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captainsophiestark · 5 months

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I Made You Breakfast

Kai Parker x Reader

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Written for my personal fic writing challenge for 2024, Sophie's Year of Fic! Featuring a new fic being posted every Friday, all year long :)

Fandom: The Vampire Diaries

Summary: Kai's on his apology tour, and Y/N is his next stop after things didn't go too well with Damon or Bonnie

Word Count: 2,000

Category: Fluff, Humor, a little bit of Angst

Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.

I sighed to myself as I headed downstairs in my favorite pair of sweats, mentally making a list of everything I had to do today. It was an unfortunately long list, compounded by the latest supernatural drama, which my friends insisted on dragging me into. Bonnie had finally made it home from the prison world, thankfully, but that didn't mean any of the drama in our lives had gone away. In fact, it had almost doubled, with news of Damon's mother floating around in another prison world somewhere. I got halfway through an eyeroll at the memory of everything going on lately when I stopped dead in my tracks.

I could smell bacon, eggs, and toast wafting up towards me from the kitchen. Someone was here, in my house, cooking breakfast. And with everything going on lately, I knew for a fact it wasn't one of my friends.

I glanced around, grabbing a stake off the nearest end table. No vampire should have been able to get into my house unless they were a friend I'd already let in, but I'd had enough near-death experiences despite that fact that I was constantly prepared.

I crept towards the kitchen, trying to listen for any signs of trap or trouble. All I could hear was a faint clinking of plates. If someone had seriously broken into my house, why the hell were they just hanging out in my kitchen making breakfast?

I got my answer a second later when I burst through the door, going for the element of surprise, and found none other than Kai Parker standing before me.

"Oh, hey!" he said, jumping and spinning to face me with wide eyes. "You're up!"

"...Yup. And... you're here. In my kitchen. Making breakfast."

"Yeah! I hope you like it. Here, let me get your plate. I thought I'd have a few more minutes."

With that, he turned to the stove and starting scooping scrambled eggs and toast onto a plate. I just watched him, not moving an inch.

"Kai?"

"Yeah?"

"What the hell are you doing in my house?"

He turned back around to look at me again, his eyes wide and the plate half-finished in his hand. After a moment, his expression morphed into a sheepish grin. I just blinked at him, my expression unchanging.

"Well, after I merged with Luke, I started getting all these... feelings." He said the word like somebody else might say 'zits' or 'rash'. "And one of those has been guilt, for some of the stuff I put you through. Or I guess, your friends, mostly. I tried apologizing to Bonnie earlier, and... it didn't go well."

His expression darkened, and I frowned. But a moment later, the clouds apparently cleared, and Kai fixed me with a beaming smile again.

"So I thought I'd try again with you. In the Prison World, I saw Damon making Bonnie breakfast all the time, and she seemed to really like that. So I figured you might, too."

I just stared at him for a few long moments without saying anything. I turned my options over and over in my mind, trying to get my still half-asleep brain to make a rational choice. I probably should've been incredibly freaked out that Kai was here at all, but I'd actually had a few positive interactions with him even before the whole merge thing, and had kind of started to like him. Or, at least, started to think he had some ally potential, despite other things he did. We'd even bonded over music taste and his new fascination with social media, and he'd tried to help Sheriff Forbes, although it hadn't necessarily been out of the goodness of his heart. For some reason, I just couldn't muster the fear or anger I probably should've been feeling when I looked at him in my house. Finally, I sighed, my mind made up. No reason to try to force bad feelings when they wouldn't come on their own, right?

"Thanks, Kai," I said, actually meaning it as I moved over to the dining table. "Aside from the fact that you broke into my house to do it... that's actually pretty sweet."

He beamed at me, and I found myself returning his smile. He turned back around to finish making my plate, and I shook my head. This was absolutely ridiculous, but I couldn't say I minded very much.

"Here you go!" he said, setting the plate down in front of me with a big smile. He didn't move away, just standing off to the side and watching me expectantly. I picked up my fork, but didn't take my eyes off Kai.

"...Aren't you gonna join me?"

"Oh! Right. You know, I've been practicing how I was going to do this in my head all morning, and now that I'm actually doing it it's like I completely forgot everything I was planning to do. That's weird, right?"

I shrugged. "I mean, sounds like a normal part of being nervous to me."

He nodded emphatically as he returned to the table and sat across from me with a breakfast plate of his own.

"All these new... emotions from Luke have been, like, super weird. I don't know how you all deal with these all the time."

"Eh, yeah, they can be annoying sometimes. It gets easier with practice though, and I'd say on the whole they're a positive experience."

Kai nodded thoughtfully, taking a bite of his eggs as his gaze wandered around my kitchen. I took a few bites of my own food, and I had to admit, he was a surprisingly good cook.

"So..." I started. "Was this it for the apology? It's a great breakfast, but usually an apology has a little more attached..."

"Oh!" Kai's attention snapped back to me. "No no, this isn't it. I was planning to do the other part of the apology while we ate breakfast."

"Makes sense. Go for it."

He cleared his throat and shifted around in his seat, then met my eyes before hesitating again. I tried to look encouraging as I ate my eggs, and after a moment, he nodded to himself and continued.

"I'm sorry for trying to kill your friend, and testing out my power on her. And that I couldn't save your other friend's mom, even though I really couldn't do anything about that. I still... I still feel bad. And honestly, I'm mostly sorry for everything I've done that hurt you, even if it was indirectly. I... I actually really like you, and so, uh... I don't want you to hate me. I keep getting this stabbing pain in my chest when I think about it... or when I think about that time I saw you crying over Bonnie..."

He trailed off, staring at the table instead of me, apparently lost in thought. After a moment though, he shook his head and cleared his throat, looking back up to meet my stare again. His blue eyes were wider than usual, his eyebrows pulling together, and he looked to be in actual distress for maybe the first time I'd ever seen, at least when his life wasn't being threatened.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I promise not to do anything to hurt you again. Will you give me a second chance?"

The corner of my mouth quirked up in a smile, especially at the rare senserity in his tone. I knew my friends would have quite a few things to say about this decision, but I didn't let myself think about that. At least not right now.

I sighed. "Kai, despite the fact that you broke into my house, I'm going to believe you about this whole 'turning over new leaf' thing. I... I'd be lying if I said I didn't like you too. So, if you really mean what you're saying about not hurting me or the people I care about anymore?"

He nodded so fast I was actually a little worried about him.

"Completely serious. Cross my heart and hope to die. I'm ready to join the Mystic Falls Scooby Doo team for good."

I smiled, laughing a little and shaking my head.

"Well, okay then. I can't promise anybody else on the team will be quite as easy to convince as me, but... I forgive you, Kai. I'm happy to see you like this. And, by the way, you make some very good eggs and toast."

"Thanks. I had to get good at cooking, you know, alone in the Prison World." A shadow passed over his face again, until I reached across the table and lightly rested my hand on top of his. Then, his face lit up like the sun. "And thanks for giving me a second chance. I promise, you won't regret it."

I wasn't totally sure I believed that, but I decided not to say so. Instead, I smiled and gave his hand a little squeeze before pulling back.

After a moment of silence where I could see Kai vibrating with the desire to say whatever he was holding back, he finally blurted out the other thing he'd apparently been planning to ask me this morning.

"So... I might be a little rusty about how all this works, or if it's changed since the eighties, but... would you want to go out with me sometime? Like on a date?"

I smiled, then buried my face in my hands. My friends would kill me if I said yes to this, but despite myself, I really, really wanted to.

"What's wrong?" Kai asked. I shook my head and looked up at him again.

"Nothing, Kai, I just... ugh, my friends are really not going to like this."

He smiled. "Does that mean you're saying yes?"

I took a deep breath and let it out, then shrugged and matched his smile with one of my own.

"Yeah. Yeah, I think it does. What the hell, right?"

"That's great! I was thinking we could go do karaoke? I've always loved karaoke. I got good at it when I was passing time in the Prison World."

"I have to warn you, I am very much not good at karaoke. But I'll still sing my heart out with you anyway, if you want to go!"

"Perfect! We can go tonight." I laughed, and Kai's expression immediately dropped. "Is that okay? Do you not want to go tonight?"

"No, Kai, I do. It's a little fast, honestly, but I don't mind. Why wait?"

"That's exactly what I was thinking. So... should I pick you up? Around seven? We could get dinner first, and then go."

"I think that sounds like a great plan, Kai," I smiled at him, which he immediately returned. A moment later, though, his hand shot up to clutch at his chest.

"Ugh, what is... what is happening to me? Why does my heart feel like it's about to explode?"

"That's probably excitement, Kai, or butterflies, which are like positive nerves. I'm feeling them too. It's because we're looking forward to going out together tonight."

Kai made a face. "This is what people were talking about when they said they got butterflies? This is terrible." I hid a laugh behind my hand, and Kai's eyes snapped up to mine. "Wait. You said you were feeling it too?"

I nodded, and Kai's expression immediately changed to a wide grin.

"So you're excited, too?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I am."

He nodded, the smile staying on his face as he dug in to his eggs again, glancing at me between almost every bite. I just shook my head, a smile on my own face all the same. This was going to be an adventure, going on a date with Kai Parker, and I knew my friends were going to want to murder me for it. But I couldn't totally bring myself to care.

Despite some pretty rocky history, I had a weirdly good feeling about Kai, from the moment he'd started his apology speech this morning. And so far, I'd never been wrong when I trusted my gut for stuff like this, even when it led me into karaoke. I had a good feeling it was going to be right about Kai Parker, too.

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agent-whiskeys-sweetheart · 1 year

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Oxytocin

Pairing: Egon Spengler x F!Reader

Summary: While looking for a new research assistant Egon finds you, a parapsychologist whose always wanted to be a Ghostbuster. Little did you both know that there would be a lot more than research and ghostbusting that would bring the two of you together.

Warnings: None! Just fluff.

A/N: Bare with me y’all. I’m really trying to get back into writing so I can answer some requests that I have. Please be patient, I promise I haven’t forgotten. I just need to get back my gumption for creating things. Thank you for understanding and I love you all!

“Venkman. Venkman, you’re getting distracted again. Would you please come into the lab?” Egon calls from the threshold of his workspace. Peter turns, jogging over to the lab and finding a rather uncomfortable bench to take up residence on as the two men talked. The first closed the doors, making his way to the work table.

“Geez, Spengs. You know, you really oughta get more comfortable furniture in here. No wonder you’re so cranky all the time.”

“I’m not cranky.” Was all Egon could say in return as he picks up a stack of papers, handing them over to Peter. “Now, I want you to look at this research I’ve been conducting. In the New York area alone paranormal activity has nearly tripled in just the last few weeks. This is getting dangerous, Venkman. I’m not sure how but I know the slime is connected to all this. I just need more time and more hands to be able to finish my research.” Peter tilts his head to the side.

“So what do you need? A bottle of whiskey to keep you up at night?”

“You know I don’t drink, Venkman.” Egon says, scolding mildly. “No, I need a research assistant to help me conduct my experiments.”

“Doesn’t Ray help you out?” Peter asks, picking up a tool on the edge of the nearby table and twirling it between his fingers. Almost as soon as he does so Egon reaches out, taking the tool into his hand and setting it back down so that Venkman will actually pay attention.

“Ray is great and he knows his stuff but he’s not always here. I need someone reliable who will be at my beck and call until we can figure out exactly what’s going on with this slime.” He insists.

“Alright. I get it. You need an assistant. Consider it done buddy.” Peter says, hopping off the bench and strolling towards the door.

“Now, Peter. I want to hold the interviews myself. I just need the money to pay whoever I find to add on to the team.”

“The money is yours pal.” He calls back as he finally makes his way out the door. Egon can’t help but roll his eyes at Peter’s seeming lack of caring for his current predicament. However, he pushes past those feelings, knowing that the man meant nothing by his apparent boredom. That’s just how Venkman always was. Nothing that could be done now. With the final approval from Peter, Egon set about writing out an advertisement for the papers to be posted ASAP.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scientist Seeking Research Assistant! Matter Is Urgent, Will Pay For Help. Come To The Ghostbusters Headquarters For More Information. Interviews Being Held During Normal Business Hours.

The ad was short, sweet, and to the point. Maybe that was what drew you to it. You didn’t need any hassle in your life right now. Just a paying gig that would fit into your schedule. Then again, there was that word. Ghostbusters. You may not have wanted to admit it, but that was really what drew you to this particular ad. That one word. Your entire life you had always loved learning about the paranormal. Of course your family hated your fascinations. They found them to be blasphemous and unholy. That never stopped you though. As soon as you had the opportunity to go to school, you finally found your place among other parapsychologists and you never wanted to go back.

Just as you were finishing up your last year of school, you started seeing the ads on TV. A group of paranormal experts that called themselves the Ghostbusters became all you thought about. You tracked their every move, studied their work religiously. They were doing exactly what you’d always wanted to do. Catching ghosts. What a thrill that would be. Ever since, you’d made it your life’s mission to become a part of that team. Now, here was your in. You may not be a Ghostbuster but you were good at research and if you could use that knowledge to help then by god, you were going to.

As you made your way out of your bed, you pulled on the most respectable looking ensemble you could find. Black pants, a nice blouse, and a black blazer. Simple but professional. Just what you were going for. You wanted to show them you were exactly the person they were looking for. Filled to the brim with excitement you left the house without even stopping to eat. That could wait. The Ghostbusters could not. As soon as you were able to hail a cab, you sped off down the busy New York streets for the old Firehouse. When you arrived you were completely starstruck. You’d seen it so many times but you’d never actually set foot inside and now was your chance. You gave the door a good tug, stepping into the building.

Inside the lights were dim, barely lighting your way as you looked for the front desk. It was just ahead of you, more illuminated than the walkway. There didn’t seem to be much natural lighting but frankly, you didn’t mind. Behind the desk sat a woman with a short auburn bob, flipping through a magazine. You stood as tall as you could and gave her a nod when she looked up at you.

“Hello. My name is Y/N L/N and I’m here about the research assistant position.” Upon hearing your words the woman leans back in her chair and yells out a name towards the back of the Firehouse.

“Egon will be here to interview you in a moment.” She says with a smile before going back to her magazine. With that you waited, taking in your surroundings. That is until a tall man with fluffy brunette hair stepped out from the back, walking in your direction. His eyes lit up when he saw you, like you were an old friend.

“Hello, I’m Dr. Egon Spengler. Can I assume you’re here about the research assistant position?” He says with excitement.

“Yes, I am!” You return his enthusiasm as he reaches out to shake your hand. You take it, feeling his soft palm against your own.

“Excellent. Just excellent. I’ll be conducting the interview in my lab. Follow me please.” He opens up the small gate for you that leads into the back rooms of the Firehouse. You happily step through, feeling like you were finally a part of their world. He directs you right back to the lab, opening that door for you as well. What a gentleman he was. It made you grin to yourself as you finally stepped into his lab. There were several work tables that were neatly piled with tools and beakers filled with chemicals. Notepads with various notes on them laid strewn about. His handwriting was very neat and you could read each word perfectly. The combination of chaos and order surprised you but this was definitely an environment you could work in.

Dr. Spengler offered you a seat on the couch against the far wall, rolling over a chair for himself. You sat down quickly, eager to begin.

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to jump right into things. You’re about the tenth person I’ve had in here this week and I’m very eager to move this process along.” You nod in agreement, ready for whatever questions he might have for you. “Good. Why don’t you tell me about your experience in the field? What are your qualifications?”

“Well, I actually attended Columbia University for a number of years and received my degree in parapsychology. I’ve completed a great number of research assignments in my time there and I went on to conduct some of my own research funded by the University.”

“Odd. My colleagues and I were actually in a very similar situation a few years back. Small world I suppose. What research were you conducting?” He leaned forward, hanging on your every word.

“Well, I was performing some studies to determine the spike in paranormal activity in the New York area opposed to other states in the country. There has been almost triple activity in this area even just over the last several weeks and frankly, I’d like to know why.”

“Another incredible coincidence. That’s exactly what I’m researching. I have some leads but nothing has been determined yet. That’s why I need help. I don’t have the hands or the time to do all this myself.”

“I understand. I couldn’t determine anything either, especially since I was forcibly removed from the University last week.”

“The more you speak, the more I feel like this is a perfect arrangement.” He adds with a self satisfied smile. “You’re much like my colleagues and I in many ways. I’m very intrigued to find out what your mind has to offer. How early can you start?”

“I can start right now!” You say, a little too exuberantly.

“I greatly appreciate your initiative and enthusiasm. Two very underrated qualities in the world of science. You can’t just do it because you must. You have to have a passion for it. It seems like that’s something you possess.” His words have you absolutely beaming. Although you have to admit that he has certainly surprised you. Based on the ads you see on TV you’d think Dr. Spengler would be rigid and cold. However, here he is talking about passion and giving off all the warmth and friendliness you can handle. It’s a very welcome change from what you had thought initially. You can’t wait to see what other surprises are in store for you. “Well, since you’re currently available I’d like to catch you up to speed on my research. I can share notes with you. Do you have a notepad handy?” He asks.

“Always.” You reply smugly, pulling a pad of paper from inside of your bag. This causes an impressed smile to spread on his face as he starts gathering up his notes to show you. As soon as he’s organized, he is off. His information comes at the speed of light but you wouldn’t dare ask him to slow down. You simply keep up to the best of your ability, writing down everything you can to study at home.

After about an hour of being inches apart while comparing notes, Egon finally sets aside his last notepad. Taking a step back towards his chair you realize that you’re actually quite sad at the loss of warmth. He reclines back, extending an arm to the couch behind you both. You sit again, now recognizing that you’re quite exhausted from the rapid fire work the two of you had been doing for a while.

“Well, I’m quite happy with how today has gone. Needless to say, the job is yours. If you’ll come in every day of the week during our normal business hours, we can get you set up with the proper equipment to continue our research.” Hearing him call it ‘our’ research made your heart flutter. “You’ll have weekends off. I can pay you minimum wage, I hope that is sufficient for your needs.”

“That works just fine for me.” You add.

“Good. I’m sorry it couldn’t be more. Do you have any questions?”

“Yes. Will I ever get an opportunity to meet your colleagues or will it always be you and I working together?”

“Oh yes, you’ll certainly meet the others. When Ray isn’t busy on jobs he usually spends time here, working in the lab. You’ll most definitely cross paths with him. As for Venkman and Winston, I’ll introduce you. Since you are a part of the team now.” Hearing him say that nearly knocked you out of your seat. You’re part of the team now.

“Wonderful. Well, I don’t think I had any other questions.”

“Excellent. If you do think of something don’t hesitate to give me a call. I’ll give you my number so that you can do so should you feel the need.” He stands and writes down his phone number on a slip of paper, handing it to you as you stand too. “Well, I won’t wear you out on your first day. You’re free to go but I will see you tomorrow.”

“Yes! Definitely. See you tomorrow.” With that he leads you back to where you entered from, seeing you off as you run outside to hail a cab. On the ride back to your apartment it’s all you can do not to scream out of sheer excitement. You were finally doing it. Making your dreams come true. You were almost sure that’s all it was, a dream. However, you knew that this was your reality now. Working with the Ghostbusters, doing exactly what you’d been training your whole life for. God, you couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You slept poorly, tossing and turning with excitement all night. When your alarm finally went off you jumped out of bed without a moment of hesitation. You had already picked out your outfit the night before, slipping it on as you headed for the door. Once again you did not eat breakfast, too ecstatic to ingest anything. Once you hailed a cab you were off, headed for your new workplace yet again.

When you headed into the Firehouse you were immediately greeted by Egon, who was standing right inside the door. As soon as he saw you he checked his watch. “You’re early. That’s excellent. With all the work we must get done, it’s important that you’re here as soon as you can be every day.” You nodded as you walked towards the lab.

“You know what they say! Early is on time, on time is late.”

“I couldn’t agree more.” He adds, straightening his lab coat. “Now, I do want to prepare you. My colleagues are all waiting for us in the lab. I wanted to introduce you to all of them and catch them up to speed on our current research. They won’t be around long so don’t worry.”

Little did Egon know you were far from worried. After years of following their work you were on the verge of meeting all of the Ghostbusters. You couldn’t wait. Yet you knew you had to stay calm.

When you finally stepped into the lab you saw that they were all crowded around a beaker of slime which sat on a workbench, watching it curiously. None of them dared touch it until Egon had arrived. Once you both came into view all three of them perked up, exchanging happy little smiles at the sight of you. You took up residence on the other side of the workbench, trying to contain yourself. Egon stood beside you and you looked at him expectantly.

“Gentlemen, I’d like to introduce you to Y/N L/N. My research assistant. I believe she’ll make a strong addition to the team.” You beamed proudly at the introduction. “Y/N, this is Winston Zeddemore, Peter Venkman, and Ray Stantz. My colleagues.”

You extended your hand to the first one in line, Winston. He took it happily. You went down the line like that as they all shook your hand.

“Well it’s a pleasure to meet you Miss L/N.” Ray was first to speak.

“Please, feel free to call me Y/N.” You add.

“Well, Y/N,” Peter was next. “It is nice to meet you. Although I’m highly doubtful that you’re any kind of scientist.”

“Peter, I’ve heavily vetted her myself. She is--” Before Egon could finish defending you, the man continued his statement.

“I only mean that I just don’t think pretty scientists exist. I mean, take a look at this ugly mug.” He says with a laugh, pinching Egon’s cheeks in his hand. “You are far too beautiful to be a scientist.”

You look up at the man beside you who shares an annoyed glance down at you. You would never admit it but you highly disagreed with Peter. Egon was one of the most handsome men you’d ever laid eyes on. You’d have to be blind not to notice his beautiful features. Of course the thought made you blush so you pushed it away, reengaging with Venkman. “Well, thank you but I can assure you I’m highly qualified for this work. Trust me, I can get the job done.”

“Well, I’m looking forward to seeing just how efficient you are.” He said, giving you a little grin. You knew that he had meant something naughty by the way he’d said it so you simply chose to ignore him.

“I for one am glad to have you on the team.” Winston added. “It’ll be nice not to be the new kid around here for once.”

“Me too!” Ray said. “I’m excited to have you around the lab. We’ll be working together every now and again. Can’t wait to get to know you.” His response was heartfelt and you couldn’t help but smile.

“Now that introductions are out of the way,” Egon began. “We’d like to show you what we’re working on.” He prompted Ray, who had helped to begin this research. The man moved the container of slime into the middle of the nearby work table. Everyone crowded around, including you. You were very intrigued to see what research had been conducted thus far. Egon had told you all about the slime the day before but you hadn’t gotten a chance to see it. Now you were going to get a good look at what it was really capable of.

“Watch this. Go ahead Ray.” Egon began.

“You! You worthless piece of slime.” Ray yells. As he does so, the slime begins to bubble. Only slightly but enough for you all to notice. “You ignorant disgusting blob!” He continues.

“You’re nothing but an unstable short-chain molecule!” Egon adds.

“You foul obnoxious muck.”

“You have a weak electrochemical bond.” As the two take turns yelling at the slime it bubbles further, getting closer and closer to the top of the container.

“I have seen some disgusting crud in my time, but you take the cake! You--” As Ray begins to get out of hand, the other three rein him back in. The sight of the young scientist getting so invested in the bubbling slime makes you giggle a bit, unable to stop yourself.

“This is what you do with your spare time?” Peter asks.

“Peter, this is an incredible breakthrough. I mean, what a discovery! A psycho-reactive substance. Whatever this stuff is, it responds to human emotional states.” You eye the slime, utterly fascinated.

“Mood slime.” Peter chimes in, simplifying the whole discovery down to a much more manageable but seemingly accurate term. “Oh baby.” He adds in a seductive tone as he leans down towards the container, backing away quickly when the slime bubbles again.

“You mean this stuff actually feeds on bad vibes?” Winston asks.

“Like a cop in a donut factory.” Ray affirms.

“We’ve been running tests to see if we can get an equally strong positive reaction.” Egon says, nodding his head at the group.

“What kind of test?” Peter asks after a brief pause.

“Well, we sing to it, and we talk to it, and say supportive, nurturing things to it.” Ray adds with a tinge of embarrassment.

“You’re not sleeping with it, are you, Ray?” Venkman can’t help but joke. However, as soon as he says it there is a palpable tension between Egon and Ray. The two exchange a glance and you can’t help but notice the blush that comes to Egon’s face. Winston and Peter join you in looking at Egon. That’s when you all come to the same realization at the same moment. “Oh you.”

“It’s always the quiet ones.” Winston says incredulously.

“You hound!” Venkman adds, holding in a laugh. Egon quickly clears his throat and begins to get up from his seat.

“How about the kinetic tests?” Everyone walks across the room behind him but your mind wanders to that little comment. What could that have possibly meant? After only a day of knowing Egon, you found your mind wandering to the thought of what he got up to you in those hours of the day when he was by himself. Ashamed by your dirty mind, you brush the thoughts away and join the others.

The next set of tests are particularly impressive and give you great insight into the slime. They took a small drizzle of slime and poured it into the open end of a toaster, setting it up on the table for all to see. After blasting some Jackie Wilson the toaster begins to pop and dance, making you all laugh. Once the two are done showing off their experiments the others vacate, leaving you and Egon alone.

“I’d like to continue my experimentation on the slime. I’d like you to help me take notes and observe for now.” He instructs.

“Yes, of course.” You pull out your personal notepad, getting your pencil ready. He dives right in, playing other kinds of music to see what might affect the slime and in what ways. You obediently take notes of its behavior, curious to see what will get it going.

After another hour of work, Egon excuses himself briefly which leaves you in the lab completely by yourself. You cradle the notepad to your chest, watching the slime for a brief moment. Looking around to make sure you are truly alone, you take a step closer. A thought pops into your head. Rather than waiting for Egon, you decide to test your little theory for yourself. Clearing your throat, you start to sing the song that had played over the speaker earlier. “I said your love keeps lifting me higher. Higher and higher, higher.” You croon. As you do so the toaster bubbles and pops twice as much as it did before.

“Magnificent!” Egon exclaims. You jump back, ending the song once you know he’s there. “I didn’t expect such a reaction but I suppose it makes sense that the slime would react more strongly to a beautiful voice. I’m afraid Ray and I aren’t really singers.” He immediately begins writing things down and you look over his shoulder, seeing if you had taken the same notes. “Sing to it again. I’d love to observe.”

Now that you have to perform on the spot you’re suddenly quite nervous. You didn’t sing anywhere but the shower so this was very nerve wracking. Especially since you had already taken such a strong liking to the man who was now beside you. You wanted to impress him. Once again you clear your throat and start singing. The reaction is immediate, the toaster jumping to life at the sound of your voice. As you sang you couldn’t help but recall that Egon said you had a beautiful voice. For some reason the compliment made you blush.

After a moment you stopped however Egon kept writing, simply murmuring to himself. “Excellent. Absolutely outstanding.” He says before turning to look at you. “You’re already making terrific contributions to the research. Thank you.” You nod your head shyly.

“I’m just glad I can help.” You say with an earnest smile.

“Well, I think we’ve discovered a great deal. I look forward to seeing what tomorrow has in store. You’re free to head home for the day.” He says, turning away from you to continue writing things down.

“Oh. Okay. Well, I’ll see you tomorrow then.” You can’t help how disappointed you feel that the day is over already. You could have stayed there in that lab with Egon for hours. However, you didn’t want to overstay your welcome so you grabbed your things and headed out the door. Once you were on the sidewalk you couldn’t help but let out a little squeal of happiness. This was everything you had hoped it would be. And more. After meeting Egon it was much better than you had even dreamed it. It was all you could do not to jump for joy but you contained yourself, hailing a cab. As great as today was, you couldn’t wait for more of this fascinating experimentation. Of course that’s not all you wanted more of but you’d never say it out loud. Heading home, you decided to get an early jump on sleeping so that the next day would come sooner. That night you dreamt of ghosts and research and science and Egon.

Tags: @localsimpmigraine @theespookybitch @twinkie-buttercream @fizzyfazzy420 @boneless07 @holewithinahole @spengler-in-a-jar @the-hidden-pages @the-mechanical-angel @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @egonscalculator @sporesmoldsfungus @tedesquire @killerheelsonadiscodancefloor @emeraldborealis @bisexual-thoughtss @notquitecanon @finniestoncrane @lonelyridesinecto-one @tinyvesselhearts

#egon spengler #egon spengler x reader #egon spengler x you #egon spengler x y/n #ghostbusters #ghostbusters x reader #ghostbusters x you #oxytocin #fluff #reader insert #self insert

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thoseyoulove · 2 months

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Reacting to The Vampire Lestat - Part IV (with a bit of spoilers)

Lestat's narration has gotten so much better actually. I mean, I still don't care when he talks about stuff that doesn't have an effect on him, but when he describes things/people that actually do? It's great. It's just so vivid, rich, colorful, sometimes even abstract that simply makes me giggle and kick my feet. When he gets really thoughtful about life, vampirism, existence, religion, morality, feelings, theater, music etc, it feels like borderline insanity, but in a brilliant way? Feels like I'm tasting some crazy drug and tripping, but it's so good? It activates a very specific part of my neurodivergent brain and I love it because I'll also be having those crazy thoughts all by myself with nobody to talk to and Lestat just gets it.

I also love the excess of exclamations on this POV haha.

Sometimes it just feels like a naive child telling things and is kind of endearing.

ARMAND!

Armand in Lestat's words: he was beautiful, ethereal, sublime, exquisite, delicate, soft, perfect, a Caravaggio painting, a Da Vinci painting, an angel, I found myself in him, the possibility of him, I didn't pay attention to [whatever] because I was looking at him etc etc.

Basically calling him the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, really.

Like, I legit MEMORIZED some of them. Lestat was THAT repetitive lmao.

I don't know if it's because the words were so superlative or because Lestat had it that bad or because I have it that bad just thinking about it, but yeah.

I'm not even kidding when I say I need to take pauses because this is kind of unsettling.

I'm so serious, but I feel like reading Lestat's description of Armand has a bigger effect on me than the prettiest person I have ever seen in freaking R E A L L I F E? What the hell, WHAT IS THIS SORCERY?

Lestat, tone it down, I'm begging you.

Been told Armand is really that gorgeous and every character talks about him that way, so apparently he isn't exaggerating... I'm gonna lie down, bye.

It's even worse because I just picture show!Armand because he's even more handsome there so it makes me dizzy.

Also because Lestat won't miss an opportunity to talk about his beauty? He LITERALLY says it EVERY SINGLE TIME he sees Armand. I'm not joking, I swear on my own life. I'm like, OKAY, WE GET IT? ENOUGH!

Armand (Lestat's version) on season 3 will be insufferable and I'm so ready for it. But also not ready yk.

At this point I'm basically just drooling over him and I don't care.

PERFECT casting with Assad. He incorporates Armand like no other. Everyone on the show is talented and I can see them as their characters, but there's one thing or another that I imagine differently sometimes? But not Armand, like, my Armand looks, walks, moves, talks, stares etc the exact same way Assad does it on the show. Every single time. The others are like, 90% or something for me, but Assad is 100% my imagination? It's like he traveled in time, stole my 2024 thoughts, went back to the past, auditioned, got the part and then played it exactly the way I see it today. It's crazy.

Wouldn't be surprised if that's the case, they already have all these possessions going on, what's more to our little satanic show lmao.

Also, great casting with Assad because no man with red-ish hair has looked this good ever. It just doesn't make sense, I'm sorry.

Armand is a beauty God, but also a really good character and I love his lines. Even when I don't agree with him, I just find him fascinating, the role he has on the story, what he represents, the way he moves the plot, whatever the effect he has on Lestat etc...

Armand's moments are never boring. He'll probably piss me off later, but right now I'm having a great time and the book has never been better.

Lesmand's/Armandstat's moments are always heated. The tension is always there. I'm not telling you what kind. Actually, I don't even know it myself. Do THEY even know?

Sam said something about how you're never sure what they are and I think he's right? At least for now. Let's see it after all the books.

They also act like they've known each other forever, have this crazy history that goes through centuries and they already can push each other's buttons... But they actually, like, only know each other for 5 minutes? CHILL?!

They're sort of soul ties/mirrors/foils/two sides of the same coin-coded in an appealing way.

I guess I can say Armand is my favorite character right now. I always read it faster when he's there, I'm always looking forward to seeing him again, I'm fine when I don't see Gabrielle or Nicki, but I'm always like, BRING HIM BACK. I don't know if I should be worried I'll grow into hating him when stuff happens or if I'll just be an Armand apologist lol. I'm scared. But let's wait to see it.

Samssad on season 3 will be delicious. Specially on the 1700s flashbacks. I'm expecting almost, if not EVERY scene of them there to be INTENSE. Great acting potential there.

I really want to see a moment with Armand and Lestat in a church like on the book? Let's take their angelic faces and curls to the next level. Put them in a church, surrounded by religious figures, stained glasses, candles etc. I don't even care what the context will be. They can be talking, silent, killing each other, doing something else, doing all of it, but give me the heavenly visuals. Actually, if they want to film the entire show in a church they can, it would be so aesthetically pleasing. Bonus points if they use Gothic churches because I'm extremely obsessed with them. Bonus points if they use Sainte-Chapelle because I'm kind of even more hyperfixated on that. I mean, it would never happen, but it should *shrugs*.

Btw, the mess Armand made in the house and the way he was reading the books is very neurodivergent of him.

The way he prefers to talk telepathically instead of speaking out loud is very neurodivergent of him as well.

Nicki is soooooooooo doomed by the narrative, omg. Anne didn't even try to hide it.

I'm not really sure how I feel about Nicki except that he needs therapy...

This is probably the silliest comment so far, I'm no longer thinking clearly after Armand's introduction. Sorry, guys. It will happen again.

The next chapter has his name so I'm scared, but also excited.

P.S. Nothing is permanent, opinions might change and this is based on Lestat’s narration, which can be unreliable. I’m reading the books so I can find out more about the characters, what potential events might happen in the show, what I can expect etc. This is my favorite show in the universe, so I want to be as informed as possible. I have no idea if I’ll become a legit fan of the books or not, but so far I’m enjoying it. I’m posting these comments only for fun.

#interview with the vampire #the vampire lestat #lestat de lioncourt #armand #do you guys use lesmand or armandstat? i prefer lesmand but don't know which one is more popular

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theinstagrahame · 5 months

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One of the best things about Crowdfunding is, stuff arrives even when you're cutting way back on spending. A *ton* of stuff arrived in the last month and a bit. Got a bunch of really neat projects in, and it's time to get hype about it!

Why these games rule, under the cut

The Revenant Society: Banana Chan is one of those names that immediately catches my attention when she's on a project. Actually, looking at the list again, the team for this game was stacked, it was a real All-Star Cast. But like, even without the powerhouse designers on the case, this just gets all the things I want in a game: Time loops, murder mysteries, trapped on the Underground. A PbtA game where you solve your own murder is, y'know, a pitch that'll attract my attention.

Hellwhalers: I saw this game coming up through design phases in the Plus One Exp Discord, and it sounded incredible. Using tokens and an old ship betting game, you're part of a whaling crew chasing Moby Dick into actual hell. Maybe Ahab wasn't crazy after all, and maybe we won't survive.

Xenolanguage: I might own everything Thorny Games makes now, because they make games about language. Folks who may not know me might not know that I *love* linquistics. Honestly, if I could repeat college, I'd put more of my time into Linguistics. But due to the linear nature of time, I'll settle for playing games about decoding alien language in a first contact situation. Sorta like that movie Contact. Which, I loved.

Mothership and Desert Moons of Karth: I read through the original version of Mothership a couple of years ago, and it's one I wanted to get more into. When I saw that there was a chance to pick up the full 1e boxset on KS, I jumped. I've also seen tons of people talk about Karth as a really awesome sandbox module for the system, so when I had a little cash on DTRPG from selling books, it was an easy pickup.

Inscrutable Cities: Possum Creek Games told me to back this, so I did (this is a joke, but I do love PCG a whole lot). In reality, I saw Inscrutable Cities on Itch a while ago, and the pitch grabbed me. I love reading solo journaling games (I still haven't found a way I like to play them, if I'm completely honest, but they're really neat reads). Walking through an impossible city is something I'd love to do, so, I have the book for it now.

Reap: Spencer Cambell makes bangers, and bangers only. I'm not *not* on a mission to collect all of his work, but Necromancers? Solo tactical board games, built on Rune? Sure. I'm in.

Luna: Spencer Campbell makes bangers, and bangers only. I also picked up another of his books this month. The Nova universe? Moon cultists trying to destroy the sun? Sure, I'm in.

3 Moonlight on Roseville Beach zines: I played Moonlight on Roseville Beach on my now-defunct podcast, and it's a game that I honestly think about a lot. The dice system was complicated, but in a really neat way that gave the players a ton of really interesting decisions with every roll. What part of my action succeeds? What kinds of complications am I opening myself to?

Anyway, R. Rook put together some characters, mysteries, and monsters for the game, and I really wanted to explore more.

Hiria, In the Margins, A Visit to San Sibilia: I mentioned earlier that I like the notion of exploring weird cities, right? Well, here's two games about that, and a cool bookmark RPG for reading. I listened to San Sibilia played in an episode of Friends at the Table, and it really captured my attention. The questions were fascinating, and they let the players flesh out a city we'd only heard of, but not seen prior to that game. It was a cool coda on a really fantastic and weird season, Sangfielle.

Grandmothership: The title alone had me, but Armanda Haller is a creator I keep an eye on, because she makes really rad stuff. This caught my attention because solving mysteries in a weird, Mothership-esque sci-fi setting, as nosy grandmothers, really just, gets me. I want to do that. I want to live that.

Holdfast Station: I've been watching Stonetop develop through its email updates. It's another PbtA game, but with a robust city-building and city development core loop that, is 100% my jam. (Low-key, one of my favorite games is Dragon Quest Builders 2.) This game takes that concept to space, which is 1000% my jam, in fact.

Spectres of Brocken: Aaron Lim is a designer I got into early on in my foray into games, and I do love Mech Anime. I am eager to see his take on Mech Anime, and I am really intrigued by the way this game handles playsets and worldbuilding as part of the game itself. Really can't wait to dive into this.

Lay on Hands: This is another of those games I've heard about, but never actually checked out. I know Alfred Valley better by reputation than by direct experience, but this is one of those games I hear people constantly telling people to check out. So, I'm gonna!

Penumbra City: Maybe 5 years ago, I read a novella by Margaret Killjoy about anarchists living in an abandoned city, and beset by assholes within their community, and supernatural horrors from without. The world kinda stuck with me, so when I saw she was working on an RPG not in the same world), I was curious to see what that would look like. I haven't cracked Penumbra City open yet, but I'm jazzed to do so.

These two fell off the pile for the big photo, so I forgot:

Deathmatch Island: I enjoyed the Hunger Games and Battle Royale movies a pretty moderate amount, but what really caught my attention here was the promise that players could also break the Reality TV Parody. The use of the Paragon system also caught my attention. After hearing one AP of Agon, I really wanted to see how that would translate into this, and it didn't take me too long reading it to go "Oh, okay, this rules."

Our God is Dead: What if you were a paladin or priest of a faith, and you found out your god was dead? What if you also had like, a bunch of people who really needed that god not to be dead, like this weekend? This sounds hilarious, and I am going to insert it into conversation often to see if people want to play it. Apologies to people who know me.

Eagle eyed viewers may have noticed a second Mothership box. What's that about?

It's a storage box for all my Mothership Zines so far... Except the two that are just slightly too big!

And, some fun comics/graphic novels:

Good Boy Paws: A friend of mine in comics put this together, and it looked extremely cute. A sweet tale of a good boi.

Wine Ghost Goes to Hell: Picked this up because the creator had contributed to Bugsnax, which is a game I enjoyed, and the concept seemed fun. Will have to check it out and report back!

#indie ttrpg #ttrpg #indie ttrpgs #indie comics #crowdfund haul report

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littledesertfox · 2 months

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intro, I guess?

hii! I figured I should make a post like this even though I have a feeling it will be like super messy xD

I've had an interest in history, specifically World War II basically since I was a kid. It was only recently though that I found out that there's a community for it! I've always had a thing with expressing my interests in ways that may seem slightly odd to other people, so it feels nice to see that there are others who seem to experience this in similar ways :3

I want to make it very clear that I am NOT a nazi or rightwing in any way, and I don't want actual (neo-)nazis to interact with my blog, get the fuck out! Similarly, I don't want racists, lgbtq-phobes, ableists, religious extremists, pedos & zoos or people of similarly disgusting kind to interact! I'm literally queer and neurodivergent (undiagnosed/suspected bc getting a therapy place is hard :/), this is not a place for you!

+++

I've been a fan of the Downfall parodies on youtube when I was younger and recently relapsed into this fixation😭 I don't know if this fandom even really exists at this point since it seems that many creators have left in the meantime, but I'd love to talk about it, maybe I'll even get to write fanfics at some point. Also a short disclaimer that when I talk about historical figures that play a major role in the Downfall parody universe (such as Fegelein, Krebs, Burgdorf etc), it will usually be about their parody selves, not the real people! I'll try to clarify that individually if needed though.

I've also started lurking a little in the reichblr tag with a feeling that I'd describe as "indimidated fascination". Currently I'm mostly interested in some members of the Wehrmacht, but other historical figures that I had or have an interest in might come up as well. Overall any stuff that I post will probably go more into the lighthearted and humorous direction, but I'd love to bring in some more educational stuff as well.

My inbox is always open if you want to gush or ramble about your favourite historical figures or Downfall characters (both from the parodies and the movie itself) and such! Please talk to me about our shared faves😭🫶

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I get crushes on fictional characters and sometimes historical figures too, but that doesn't mean I support, condone or defend their worldviews or actions in any way (this applies especially to real people of course)! These "crushes" usually stem from a place of fascination with who they were behind their public appearance, I want to know more about them as a private person, like their hobbies, favourite food and other mundane things like that. Often it's also simply that I feel physically attracted to their appearance because I think they're handsome, either that or they give me massive gender envy (or both lmao). I don't really control on who I fixate like that, it just happens, but I hope that this will be a place for me to express those feelings in some way and find like-minded people. Though I also want to point out that not all my fixations are automatically also crushes! Usually I will mention whether they are or not, or you'll probably notice based on what kind of posts I make about them lol.

Current main historical fixations:

Erwin Rommel (I can't help it I just think he's cute ._.)

Fritz Bayerlein (he's the dude in my pfp lol, there's barely info about him but idk I just think he's kinda interesting😭 also yes he was actually bi)

Current main Downfall fixations:

Hans Krebs & Wilhelm Burgdorf (the otp ever)

Wilhelm Mohnke (ngl Downfall!Mohnke is kinda fine❤️‍🔥 ... idk maybe I'm just finding the actor hot though😭)

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If I encounter things that make me uncomfortable I follow common fandom courtesy and block tags or blogs accordingly. This is nothing personal, I'm just curating my own online space. I don't want to see any harassment here, neither towards myself nor to others!

Anyway I guess that's it for now? Idk if this is any good as an intro post but for now it'll have to do I guess😂 I'm generally not really sure yet in which direction to go with this blog (should it be more Downfall or reichblr focused? is there a lot of overlap between the fandoms? do they even get along? help😭). I also don't know how active I'll be in general, I'm also constantly jumping between thoughts like "yee this is gonna be fun" and "dafuq am I doing here I should feel ashamed about myself" but I hope to meet people who share my interests :3

#downfall parodies #downfall parody #downfall #der untergang #reichblr #ww2 #ww2 germany #how do I tag this help #also I have no idea what to do for my blog theme so I guess for now it's just Fritz lol #I'm honestly nervous about posting this ahh

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 5 months

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tuesday again 4/23/22

three months unemployed YAY. also wherein i get SUPER pressed about star wars lore

listening

funeral by tele novella. popped open tiktok to see something my best friend sent me and this was there, the first thing on the for you page. let's yoink a description of their previous album from an interview i'm going to quote at length in a bit: "The result was “exactly what we wanted it to be,” a perfumed mist of jingling, jangling, lilting, off-center pop—a strange little snowglobe gathering dust at the back of the shelf."

youtube

the lyrics did hit me like a train bc i often find myself mourning places and situations that were not necessarily good for me but were familiar.

Oh, you're not tied up Here comes the train The tracks feel safe because you know 'em

if you had told me this was made in about 2007-2009ish i would have believed you. very spare production in the way folksier songs of the time were spare. a bit raspy and direct in her delivery. there's a bandcamp interview wherein i found out this is the side project of a vintage/antiques dealer and she has a fascinating perspective on her own music:

Her passion for the craft is evident—in our conversation as much as in listening to the band—but music, for her, is a means to an end, a way to transmit stories. “As a musician, I’m mediocre at best,” Ribbons says matter-of-factly. “I think that my talent lies in my storytelling ability. I think that I’m a good storyteller.” It’s something instilled in her by her grandparents, “voracious readers” who were always buying her books and secretly wanted Ribbons to be a writer, she suspects.

i really adored this whole album as a cohesive work. "vampire cowgirl" is another standout for obvious reasons.

youtube

You came barrelin' down Rabid with some talk Of a gal who rides at night Picking off the stock

remarkably good at reproducing the general vibe of the midcentury cowboy western album, when tv cowboys were sweeping the nation

reading

T. Kingfisher's Nettle & Bone. enjoyed it, but not quite as much as her other stuff. whereas her other series are almost always comical and often stray into farce, this one was a bit grim. even with the addition of a demonic chicken. had to stop and really think about if my own experience with funerals and funerary rites (too many, too often) was coloring this for me but i think it is simply not as funny or interested in being funny as her other works. not a ding against it, but not what i was really expecting or in the mood for. image from tor, let's yoink the description from macmillan

This isn't the kind of fairy tale where the princess marries a prince. It's the one where she kills him. Marra — a shy, convent-raised, third-born daughter — is relieved not to be married off for the sake of her parents’ throne. Her older sister wasn’t so fortunate though, and her royal husband is as abusive as he is powerful. From the safety of the convent, Marra wonders who will come to her sister’s rescue and put a stop to this. But after years of watching their families and kingdoms pretend all is well, Marra realizes if any hero is coming, it will have to be Marra herself. If Marra can complete three impossible tasks, a witch will grant her the tools she needs. But, as is the way in stories of princes and the impossible, these tasks are only the beginning of Marra’s strange and enchanting journey to save her sister and topple a throne.

paywalled article, sorry, but i personally have a bone to pick with fanduel due to [REDACTED INCIDENTS] from [PREVIOUS JOB] so it does not surprise me in the slightest that they don't really seem to be doing a single fucking thing about money-laundering. allegedly.

watching

the bad batch, or the 13/16 episodes of the third and final season that are out. all these images are from comicbookreview bc i watched this on my actual television

one of the plots i hate most is the trying to get someone back plot. for example, i think finding nemo does this really well bc it's also a coming of age/parenting movie. i do not think the second finding nemo movie does this well bc as soon as one person is reunited with the group, through a wacky series of coincidences they lose another member. plus that movie is part of the downturn of modern pixar where they forgot how to tell interesting stories but that's neither here nor there. the bad batch falls into the finding nemo 2 category. it's simply frustrating to watch. it turns into a desperate floundering after whoever happens to be missing instead of using a The Searchers style plot to say something about the act of the search itself. i realize i am once again saying "what if star wars was good" but like. come on.

the bad batch s3 is surprisingly focused on retroactively filling in the backstory of how and why palpatine got cloned with his force powers intact, which is apparently a difficult technical problem. i would have cared about this if this show came out before the last movie and we had a cool breadcrumb style approach leading up to the movie. unfortunately that movie (and the sequel trilogy more broadly) killed a lot of my interest in modern star wars. anyway, this cloning problem leads to a lot of very technical conversations in a children's' show that are interesting to me, a grownup, bc no star wars media has ever successfully explained 1) what midichlorians actually are and 2) the biological processes by which they operate but refuse to be cloned? which is extremely funny to me bc midicholrians aren't supposed to be real. qui-gon has that whole little speech and blood test in the phantom menace but the series had So scrupulously stayed away from explaining how the force works before that. they still fail to explain it but they at least attempt to break two inches of new ground. side note this show gives us TWO canon trans girl clones and i really wish they were in a better show.

it's annoying that i'm annoyed about a children's show meant to sell toys. some fun things: the pyke syndicate shows up, a slew of my favorite bounty hunters show up, this show is much better at painterly backgrounds and has an overall more concept-art feel than the clone wars proper or rebels. i think it would be cool if they stopped whitewashing the clones. i'm going to finish out the season but i don't exactly have a lot going on in my life right now. i am not terribly sad that this is the final season but BOY do they have a lot of loose ends to wrap up in three episodes.

playing

new genshin update on uhhh thursday and it's kind of exciting bc i THINK it will finally fill in this hole on the map and the associated shorelines of three different countries!

i thought i had long since found all the chests in liyue (the second area released) but in the process of doing a recently released character quest set in liyue i found another chest. this game is very good at hidden objectives and little secrets but i wish it was better at letting you know when you have Actually cleared an area completely of all the little hidden stuff. anyway i have been holding back the last character hangout (ningguang, my best beloved ruthless girlboss business high femme) for a terrible day and that day came! unfortunately hanging out with the fake pretend video game lesbian did make me feel better!

also unfortunately i fucked up and cannot count so the gacha pity system (every 90 pulls you're guaranteed a 5-star character) gave me Neuvillette. who i don't hate but i wasn't really planning on pulling for. i do like his questline and his voice actor, he simply doesn't fit in super well with a mono-electro team bc i play this game like an insane woman.

the real bitch of the thing keeping me from upgrading him is going out in the overworld and collecting enough sea stars. why can't he need flowers or little gears or anything else i have a thousand of.

anyway this gal will be dropping sometime in the next six weeks and i AM extremely excited to pull for her. she has some cool abilities (GUN) and is part of a popular pair with the steampunk lolita character i love and leads my other main team. i hope their abilities play well off each other but she has such a cool storyline and design i don't super care if she fits in with my playstyle. i will adapt for her in a way i am not willing to do with neuvilette

making

i am once again obsessed with gallery walls, bc a friend has asked me to find the correct gigantic size frames to put some comics on his wall, and that has given me an excuse to go to thrift stores again.

unfortunately i have mostly found frames for me, and the projects i have been working on have kind of a long tail of when they will actually be on my walls. i picked up four 16x20 frames for $2.50 each (solid wood! remarkably detailed!) bc i eventually want to put up these fallout maps in the style of national parks maps up on the map wall in my office. i suppose this means i should join @ruffledringdove and actually play '76, bc that's the one modern game i haven't played. these are getting scuff sanded with 120 and painted with a eggshell paint sample in a bright white u all know the drill at this point. ive painted a lot of frames in the past few weeks.

left is one of the painted 16x20 map frames, right i have also finally sanded and painted both 12x16 deckle-edged wood frames i picked up off the side of the road in MA. and found glass + backs for them! eventually i will procure fancy mats and print + frame my grandmothers' portraits. they will eventually go on the living room wall, which is a neutrals and blue-greens wall of slightly disdainful women. this will help me swap the three maps in there to the office map wall.

i have also acquired this gigantic plaster-over-wood mirror for $15. i am using leftover rub n buff bc i don't have a great spot to spraypaint here without sheeting my entire front porch, and rub n buff is way less susceptible to 80% humidity than spray paint. also i would have to buy spray paint. i am looking up suspiciously bc i thought there was a bug. not sure what mackie was looking at.

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem

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sirianasims · 9 months

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Chapter 29

Just Like Fire

The year I turned 42 was also the year we lost my mother. My father soon followed her, just as he always had in life.

They had been inseparable through everything – demanding careers, the loss of my brother, all of my problems – for almost 45 years. And now, not even death could keep them apart for long.

I was shattered. I wouldn’t have gotten through it without Cecilia. I could only hope to get 45 years by her side as well.

I tried to keep it together for the girls who were also grieving.

Freya took it the hardest, of course.

She had known them for much longer than Grace, and had always been close with her grandparents. And she was already dealing with a lot.

At least something good came out of it. Samuel came over to comfort her, although things were a little awkward between them at first.

But their life-long friendship won in the end, and it actually seemed like they finally made up.

I don’t know if they ever discussed that fateful evening a few years ago, when he revealed his true feelings, but I was glad that she at least had the comfort of a friend.

Samuel always had a gift for cheering Freya up. It didn’t take long before he dramatically pretended to lose his balance, pushed her over and fell to the floor, flailing wildly, as they both laughed.

He would always do whatever it took to see her smile again.

I was happy that she had Samuel in her life. He was a good kid.

Very different from his older brother, Charlie. Whenever I felt challenged by my girls, I reminded myself that it could be much worse.

Charlie had been getting into all sorts of trouble for years, but it all came to a head a few months ago. He had been arrested at a rave while playing a gig with his band, and they found drugs on him.

Colten and Kailani had done their best, bailing him out and begging him to change before it was too late. But it was no use, Charlie had walked out in anger and they hadn’t heard from him since.

He hadn’t always been like that. Although he’d never exactly been the teacher’s pet, Charlie had still been a good big brother to Samuel, and he had often included Freya as well. Charlie and one of his band mates had even accompanied her to get her first tattoo when she turned 18, for moral support.

I was secretly relieved that Charlie wasn’t around anymore. I knew Freya had always found his odd-coloured eyes and rebellious attitude fascinating and I didn’t want her to get involved in whatever he was doing.

So compared to Colten and Kailani, I had it easy as a parent. But even though Freya was ridiculously talented, she still struggled with her self-worth. Confidence, she had. She knew exactly what she was capable of. But she was insecure when it came to other things, as if she couldn’t quite believe that people really liked her. She was popular among her team mates, but her only true friend seemed to be Samuel.

No matter what I did, Freya felt like the odd one out in the family. I tried to treat the girls the same, obviously allowing for the fact that Grace was only 9 and Freya had just turned 19, but it often felt like I couldn’t quite reach her.

She was, of course, under a lot of pressure. She had applied for several sports-related scholarships, and was constantly either training or studying.

Other parents with teenage girls mostly worried about stuff like drinking or going out with boys. Freya was extremely anti-alcohol – which was understandable, considering my past and the effect it had on her childhood. She also had some rather severe opinions on dating, it seemed.

beginning / previous / next

#duchellilegacy #duchellichapters #duchelligen3 #eric duchelli #cora duchelli #zane fyres munch #cecilia bell #freya duchelli #Can I offer you a nice hug in this trying time?#its a terrible day for rain #charlie ward #caleb vatore #grace duchelli #samuel ward #kailani ward #colten ward

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eventinelysplayground · 5 months

Text

Anatomy Lesson

This fic is brought to you by my conversation with @echoes-in-the-forest when we were laughing over the misreading of my previous Isaac fics title. It just stuck in my head and I was inspired for this, it is also the fic that got 0% of the votes for my badly described WIP poll awhile back which me knowing what it was made me laugh because I think it'll be popular, it was also finished awhile ago but it got pushed back for other stuff. This fic is definitely NSFW so minors do not interact. Isaac decides to learn more about anatomy and enlists your help while studying. WC approx 1796.

Isaac sat in his chair reading, his desk was covered in books, some closed while others were laid open to various pages. He barely registered the knock on his door or the sweet voice that followed it.

“Isaac it's me, I brought you something to eat and some rogue.”

“Huh? Oh!”

Isaac had finally lifted his head out from his book at your voice and when he did he noticed it had gotten very dark.

“I must have read through dinner.”

“That's why I brought you up something.”

Isaac felt you place a soft kiss on the top of his head and he smiled up at you.

“Thank you and I am sorry I didn't come down to eat.”

“It's alright Isaac I know you get lost in your research though, this doesn't look like your normal research.”

“You're right it's not.”

Isaac followed your gaze down to one of the open pages that had a diagram of a skull on it.

“I didn't think you were interested in biology.”

“That's a bit generalized but you're right I never really cared much about it.”

“So what brought this on then?”

“Earlier today Le Recteur ‘asked’ me to take over Professor Belanger’s anatomy class for him as he was called away for an emergency and I was free. I told him I wasn't familiar with anatomy but he said I would be fine, the students had just started an examination and only needed someone there to supervise them.”

Isaac heard the giggle you tried to hide and he frowned.

“Getting back to the point as the students began to hand in their examinations I decided to look over them and realized just how little I knew about the subject. I always had a generalized knowledge of it but nothing in depth. Honestly I never really cared to study it, I was too focused on other more serious subjects. I found myself quite curious reading through the exam papers and just like other scientific fields it's changed so much over the intervening years and I found myself wanting to learn more.”

Isaac reached for his sandwich and took a big bite out of it.

“Well I'm glad you found something new and interesting. I'll let you get back to your books, just promise me you won't forget to eat again.”

As you turned to leave Isaac had an idea and he hurriedly swallowed his bite of sandwich.

“Actually, would you mind helping me?”

“Of course not but I don't think I can be of much help, biology wasn't my best class.”

Isaac stood up from his chair gently grabbing your upper arms and guiding you to stand in the center of his room.

“Umm Isaac how is this helping you?”

Isaac walked back over to his desk and picked up a thick book before returning to you.

“This book talks about the different bones and muscle structures. The drawings are good but I think it will be easier to understand by following along on an actual body. That is, if it's alright with you?”

“I already said I didn't mind helping you and I'm done with work for the day so why not.”

“Excellent! Thank you.”

Isaac gave you a quick peck on the cheek before he started flipping through the thick book. As he combed through the text he would reach out and poke, prod or twist you around in different places feeling for muscle groupings or seeing how they worked together while your body was in motion.

Isaac was mildly aware of you moving occasionally, like when he ran his fingers from your side across your stomach and you squirmed as you let out a giggle, but for the most part he was completely absorbed in his new fascination. He started to become more focused blocking out all possible distractions as well as becoming more thorough with his touch.

“Isaac.”

His hands had slowly and methodically moved their way upwards caressing over your stomach and sides, along your arms and shoulders and now moved slowly along your neck.

“Isaac.”

Isaac didn't stop, he brushed your hair aside to get a better look at the back of your neck leaning in close to examine you better with his lips almost grazing the side of your neck.

“Isaac!”

He was pulled back to the present suddenly by your loud and desperate sounding cry of his name.

“Did, did I hurt you? I'm sorry I should have been more careful poking and-”

Isaac had moved to stand in front of you concerned he had hurt you somehow with his examination but what he found was not a look of pain or distress on your face but one of longing and desire.

“You didn't hurt me Isaac it's just…”

Your words trailed off and Isaac could see your cheeks and ears were flushed.

“The way you were touching me felt so good and…my body started getting other ideas.”

“It, it did?”

“Yes.”

Now it was Isaac whose cheeks were turning red as he thought about the way he had been touching her. He felt that familiar heat stirring inside him. Encouraged by the look in your eyes he stepped closer to you running his fingers along your cheek.

“You know I…I think it would be more helpful to me if we removed your clothes. That way I could get a better feel of everything. Of course you don't have to if you don't want to-”

“No! I mean, no it's fine Isaac. I don't mind taking them off.”

Isaac swallowed hard as he watched you slowly unbutton and remove your blouse, followed by your skirt. He stood there in awe of your perfect body, your perfect heart that loved him despite how awkward he was. Once you were completely bare in front of him he stepped closer and began his study of your body again.

Isaac started where he had stopped when you had called out to him. His fingers glided along your neck followed by his lips. Each time his lips touched your bare skin he could feel you shiver and detect a change in your body temperature. Slowly, methodically he kissed his way across your neck and over your shoulder. He heard the small sigh you let escape your lips and he smiled to himself.

He kissed down from your shoulder across the top of each breast while his finger caressed down your sides and hips. He could hear how fast your heart was beating and he rained kisses down right where it should be. He continued his exploration of you running his tongue over one nipple before capturing it in his mouth and sucking hard.

“Mmm Isaac.”

“Shhh, I like quiet when I study.”

Isaac was surprised that he voiced his request aloud and he looks up to see your eyes briefly wide with shock before you nod at him, a sheepish smile on your lips. Of course he knew he could be demanding but right now he wanted to explore your body fully and just the sound of your sweet voice alone was enough to undo him.

He brought his lips to your other breast tenderly kissing along it. As his lips closed around your nipple he moved one hand from your hip down along your stomach and in between your legs. His fingers caressed your inner thigh as he methodically studied every little twitch of your muscles brought on by his actions.

Slowly he moves his fingers further inward towards your most sensitive spot. He makes sure his touch is feather light as he lets his fingers glide over your wetness, wanting to draw out more reactions from your body.

“Do you know how many different muscles and parts of the body are used to perform something as simple as a kiss?”

Isaac's question was rhetorical of course as he closed his lips over yours before you could even begin to think of an answer. As he deepens the kiss and twines his tongue with yours he hears the muffled moans of pleasure that try to escape your captured lips. He wanted to take his time studying your body but now his own desire is too far gone.

“I'm sorry, I can't wait any longer.”

“Don't apologize, I want y-”

Isaac runs his thumb along your lips to cut you off.

“Shhh.”

He kisses you again as you both move towards his bed, your hands working furiously at the buttons on his shirt while his own undo his belt. Isaac wastes no time once you've reached the bed and has you pinned beneath him without breaking your kiss. He doesn't even bother to finish removing his pants instead just pulling them down just enough to free his hard cock so that he can take you.

“I wanted to be gentle with you but I can't.”

Isaac's lips find yours again as he briefly brushes up against your wetness before guiding himself deep inside you. His thrusts are quick and deep and he can feel your body reacting to his. The way your skin is flushed and warm, the way your panting into his kiss, the movement of your hips and the increasing wetness as he pleasures you. He grips one of your hands in his and laces your fingers together.

“Your body is amazing, the way you react to my touch, the way I fit inside you perfectly and how you tighten around me. It's like your body was designed to compliment mine in every way, created for me alone.”

Isaac kissed you once more before sinking his fangs into your neck. He feels your body arch as your core tightens around him and he knows you're desperately trying not to cry out in pleasure. He thrusts even faster and harder now, his heat reaching farther into you then it has before. His free hand moves to knead your breast as he licks the blood from your neck. He lifts himself to look at you and finds you biting down on your hand to stop your cries.

Seeing you trying so hard to fulfill his desires only makes him want you more and he thrusts even faster. He moves your hand from your mouth nipping at your lower lip before piercing it with his fangs. As your body writhes beneath him from the new wave of heat his release hits and he fills you up with it. Normally he would be satiated with this much for now but not tonight.

“It's not enough, I'm going to love you all night long.”

Isaac waits only long enough to catch your nod before he starts thrusting again while sinking his fangs deep into the crook of your neck and keeping true to his word.

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikevamp fanfic #ikemen vampire isaac #ikevamp isaac

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cherry-blossom-qf · 6 days

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Necro, who was the kindest person in your life? And what was the hardest sacrifice you've made— literally or figuratively?

Apple Core, what was your most challenging experience as a Sensei?

Prince, O lord of fashion, which if your fits and/or forms is your absolute favorite?

Magomon, what's your opinion on Tamers in general?

Officer, my good sir, what was the toughest case you've helped or had to solve? Any solo cases?

UT, what are your favorite holiday traditions in the Underground and Surface world?

🩸: "There hasn't been a sacrifice thats been that hard for me to perform. The only thing I truly regret sacrificing is my ability to smell normal ever again. Seriously, I tried bathing multiple times and used every single perfume, cologne, all the scent products... AND I STILL CANT GET RID OF THE ROITING CORPSE SMELL!!

As for who's the kindest person I know? Well... the obvious answer would be Kirby... but there's also this snowman that has been helping me with my research, perhaps I could talk about them some other time."

🍏: "Most challenging things as a sensei? Well, to perfectly honest, it's the students that are, and I mean this in the nicest way possible, require a lot of patience from me. For example; I have this one student who is just, again I mean this in the nicest way possible, a stubborn wanna-be-cool-guy.

Don't get me wrong, he does have a lot of potential to be a Skylander and I can see him becoming one in the future... BUT he's just has a really bad habit of wanting to do things all by himself because he's 'so cool' with his high running speeds and cool dragon sword, only to get his ass handed to him one way or the other. I thought Blades' cockiness when he became a Skylander was bad, that student takes the cake!!!"

👑: "Favorite outfit? My goodness!! That's like picking between my own children!! But... if I had to pick just one.... like, you holding a knife to my back and forcing me to pick just one, then I'm gonna pick the robes I wore to my wedding. They were so sparkly and beautiful, I truly felt special on my special day~! As for forms, the Prince Form is my favorite. I like the height boost, elegance, and a sense of power in that form, hehehe~"

🎩: "My thoughts on Tamers? Well, I have said before that there have been tales and legends of humans being involved with digimon. I've always found it fascinating, as those legends have told of humans granting digimon power they could never get on their own. I kinda wished to see something like that happen one day... Little did I know that I was gonna get a human myself, hehe!!

Susie has been lots of fun to travel with, and the power she grants me and Marxamon has been incredible (tho I wish evolving into Crownedmon was so mentally scaring and painful)!! I could have never asked for a better human partner!! Me and Marxamon are her 'goodiest boys'!! 'Goodiest' is not a grammatically correct word, but I let it slide because she gives me hugs and pets!♡♡♡"

🚔: "Funnily enough, my toughest case was actually my first solo case!! The case of Artie Flopshark, a poker guru that was supposed to be dead, as he was killed by Flint Paper. According to some of the records, Artie's bank account was still active, depositing and withdrawing money regularly as if he was alive. And there had been reports of Artie being near abandoned graveyards across the country. Flint Paper couldn't track him down for the life of him, so he assumed it had been some kind of 'witchcraft' that made this guy untraceable. So Flint gave the case to me since I'm a mage and stuff (witchcraft and my magic are obviously two different things, but I let it slide). Sam and Max had a lot of faith that I could handle this on my own, so I took on the challenge just to make them proud. The weeks of trying to find this guy felt like the longest weeks of my life! But I was able to find him.

Long Story Short; It turned out Artie Flopshark was revived as a zombie like monster by a bunch of teenage wizards that were messing around with dark arts (kinda sounds familiar). When the wizards successfully revived him, they freaked out and left him behind. Artie was able to get a hold on that dark arts book that they coincidently dropped and used it to get around the county's graveyards. He was hosting nightly poker nights to get his funds back for his new undead life, inviting all sorts of creeps and ghouls to play games of Texas Hold'em. In fear of being killed again by Flint, Artie used magic to keep himself untrackable from any living being on earth. Which I was able to work around the effects because I'm not from earth, hehe~!!

I felt kinda bad for him since even mentioning Flint Paper made him scream in panic, so did Artie a favor and helped him get a restraining order on Flint. I got my paycheck and a celebration surprise from Sam and Max that they planned for me for completing my first solo case, a VIP trip to The Inventory for drinks, dinner, and poker."

💙: "Well damn, ol' gunner boy spoke in whole paragraphs! Ok, favorite holiday.... I gotta give it to Halloween, dude. Monsters seem to enjoy Halloween a lot, and I can see why, as my best memories here are sometimes related to Halloween. Like on our first trick-or-treating, Frisk dressed up as a witch and made me their little 'black cat' by dressing me in a black cat onesie. I was carried around in their backpack as we went around the neighborhood. And when I got my monster form perfected, me and Frisk did even cooler matching costumes! Mario and Luigi, Dipper and Mabel, Steven and Amethyst, Freddy and Bonnie, heck we even Sans and Papyrus a few times! (which the bros really liked)

Even though I moved out of Toriel's house after I got married, Frisk and I still go trick-or-treating together every Halloween with our matching costumes. And Frisk hasn't grown out of trick-or-treating just yet, so we'll be continuing this little tradition of ours for a few more years! And I'll be enjoying every moment."

🦋: "Man I sure do love being involved!" -he said to no one.

(Congratulations Blaze, you changed my QnA formatting just for this ask! Eff you and have a nice day!)

#magolor aus qna #this took DAYS for me to come up with an answer for all of them! DAMN YOU BLAZE!#Good lord I put too much effort into this ask wtf #If you need me I'll be in the corner steaming like a fried computer after running too many minecraft mods #If there is ANY spelling mistakes in this that I missed you can just slap me in the face

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sandyca5tle · 5 months

Text

Slime HRT - 6 Months

Back again for six months of slime hrt. Starting to see more noticeable changes over the last two months, things are revving up!

First things first: I’ve actually got some slime now!! It’s only the skin on the tips of my fingers and toes, since they’re the thinnest part of my body, but they’re slime! (my hair’s also changed some more, but I’ll talk about that after this) It is a little weird since it’s only the skin, so I can see the musculature that resides beneath since the slime is translucent, but hopefully that’ll turn soon too. I was a little worried about infections, since obviously the skin is normally there to protect all the inside bits, but apparently my slime does the same job, if not better, since it can dissolve any germs and stuff that enter it.

I have gotten a couple of weirded out responses from people who’ve noticed, although one or two were a little fascinated by it as well, and a few people have given me… less than nice looks and remarks, but I've been trying to ignore and shrug them off…

The other thing I’ve had to get used to is that, while my slime can dissolve microscopic things like germs and viruses, fluff and lint get stuck in there, so I have to pull them out. It’s a little annoying, since I kinda pick up any small fragments of anything, but it is a kinda nice sensation, almost like peeling dried glue off your hands, although that still wins on most satisfying.

As I said before my hair has also changed, it’s basically completely slime now, and is more one solid shape than individual strands, although there’s still a few holdouts. It has made it much easier to style as well, since it’s more like shaping clay, so I’ve been messing around with that a little too. Wearing a headset to play games does tend to cause issues though, since the weight tends to deform it, and I’m not at the point where I can just mentally reshape it, so I always have to find a mirror to help fix it after I’ve finished (Had a few embarrassing moments where I had a lovely imprint of my headset in my hair). Having a solid blob of slime around and at times resting against my face has been… interesting and it can be a little uncomfortable at times, since it kinda feels wet and, well, slimy. Kinda hoping that that’ll change once my face changes to slime as well, since they’ll match, so my sense about it will change too.

Naturally, actually being part slime now, my thirst has gotten worse, and I’m really having to keep on top of it; my body is sure to let me know if I’m not. I’m hoping that I won’t need to drink so much once I’m done, but we’ll have to see.

On top of the thirst, I’ve now also been getting small cravings for sweet things, which I’m guessing is ‘cause I’m gonna be a sap slime, so I need to get the additional sugar for sweetness. On that note, my fingertips actually do taste a little sweet when I lick them, so that’s neat.

My skin is also undeniably orange now, although it’s a subtle shade for now, which is a small blessing, but yeah, really reaching the point where I can’t pass things off as a trick of the light. On the note of skin, where the slime meets skin is really weird, and I’ve had to stop myself picking at the less sensitive areas - found out the hard way that hitting mostly exposed nerve ending really fucking hurts.

That’s pretty much it for this month, but yeah, glad to have really noticeable changes finally. Will see you in the next update.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ First - Prev - Next

#slime hrt #non-human hrt #species hrt #humanity replacement therapy #transgender #my writing

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transcending-chaos · 4 months

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I always found it fascinating how a card game like Chaotic had such a long and fascinating history. From starting as a Danish trading card game popular in Demark in the 80s to being revised three times and having its name changed since its original inception to the card game, we all know today. To getting a cartoon show and an online game to being shut down and now being revived.

Even now more information about the show and card games cancellation just came to light in the form of a reddit post from two years ago stating that after the poster dug through some publicly posted earnings and investor calls during the time of Chaotic they found a coloration that the game was actually losing 4kids money during the 2008 recession and onwards and that it was the primary reason why it got cancelled and they couldn't find any trace of the 4kids/Bryan Gannon lawsuit.

Basically, 4kids wanted Chaotic to bring in between 20-30 million which it did but they were disappointed that it didn't exceed expectations. 4kids also wanted Chaotic to be on par with Yu-Gi-Oh and Pokémon without realizing that Konami had other divisions to make up the failings if Yu-Gi-Oh ever had any same as Pokémon has Nintendo and their divisions while 4kids only had Chaotic and a cartoon block.

To this day no one knows why 4kids/4licencing hanged on to Chaotic since they weren't doing anything with it, and they didn't want to sell it for some reason until either the licensed expired or until Bryan bought the license off of them.

I always assumed it was because 4Kids/4Licensing had some sort of legal battle with the other parties making claim to the IP; but I do not know the reality of what may have happened.

I know from growing up during that time period, the cards and products weren't anywhere. They didn't stay in stores long, and the scraps you did find were single packs, but nothing enough to make a functional deck. It stunk.

As a kid, I always wondered why this show acted like it had stuff you could get, because it just didn't exist in any of the shops, card/comic stores, or collectible places my brothers and I went to.

It was strange to see this thing I really loved just disappear, which is why I just poured so much of myself into the fandom -even especially if it was just a cringey mess.

#chaos speaks #thoughts on the show

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aritany · 8 months

Note

sorry to be nosy, but do u have any insights as someone who went through a divorce at a young age?

don't be sorry - what a fascinating question! it's STORYTIME. i don't know if this is so much my 'insights' as it is ruminations, but i digress.

i guess my number one tip would be: don't marry a bigot,,,

i'm kidding. mostly.

i'm very transparent about why i got divorced (if you know me in real life, you know how true this is), but that's what it boiled down to. i got married VERY young, 95% due to deeply religious family on both sides, 5% because i truly believed i had found the person i was going to be with forever. if you're going to be together forever, why not just bite the bullet and get married young, right?

i came out to my ex-husband as bisexual super early on in our relationship (i think 2 months into dating) because i obviously needed him to a) know i was queer and b) be cool about it, and he was. if i recall, he said, "oh. ok, good for you."

(later, he told me that that moment was almost a dealbreaker for him. i NEVER would have known, based on how he reacted in the moment.)

as a married couple, we were awesome roommates and very good friends and overall a wonderful team. then i started properly deconstructing christianity around the same time i started thinking about gender, and covid hit immediately after. i didn't come out to anyone as nonbinary until march 2021, and when i did, he was the first person i talked to. he was... significantly less cool about it than he was with bisexuality.

here's the thing. he LOVED having a wife. in hindsight, it's really easy to see that i could have been anyone, and he was really ready to settle down. i have to give myself some credit, because i think i'm excellent, but i do think that to some extent i was in the right place at the right time and checked off a lot of his boxes. if that sounds a little cold to you -- a SHOCKING amount of cishet men do this. it's weird.

anyway, i was His Wife™, and while i was by no means a traditional christian wife, i was still a very she/her slay queen girly.

then i started committing sins. (got some tattoos. started writing about The Gays. started speaking out against the church. Cut My Hair Short [cue gasps]. started dressing more androgynously.)

he couldn't get his head around using gender neutral language for me. to his students (he was in education at the time) i was His Wife. to his family, i was His Wife, even after i came out to them too. classic wifeguy stuff.

my current partner (who is SO wonderful) was in the process of becoming that best friend you have really confusing gay feelings about, and had to deal with me talking about this and how i was just going to have to settle for being with this guy who wouldn't respect my gender, even when that disrespect started actually making my skin crawl when he'd get close. because hey, marriage is for life. it didn't even occur to me that we might get divorced until about 4 days before The Conversation. i was genuinely ready to stick it out with this guy who refused to really See me, because i thought that was what i had to do.

then came The Conversation. i'd been invited to be a bridesmaid in his sister's wedding and had agreed to wear a dress, because hey, it's her wedding. if she wants bridesmaids in dresses, sure. (i was still very much reeling from my own wedding, but that's another story i'll tell if anyone's curious.)

anyway. dresses. i go to a fitting. i stand there numbly while wearing the most godawful dress i'd ever seen, feeling like Garbage. i go home. i step in the door, i burst into tears. sobbing, on the couch, i tell him that something's not right. i can't wear a dress to this wedding.

i think that was when he realized i wasn't going to grow out of being nonbinary. we had a really long, brutal conversation, mostly about how i was probably going to want top surgery one day, that ultimately resulted in him ending our marriage.

"i can't make you be somebody you're not," he told me. "but you can't make me attracted to you."

that's right, folks! the thing that ended my marriage was my tits.

we'd sat through and endured many conversations in which i shared my feelings about the church, about christianity, about the patriarchy, about gender as a whole, but in the end, the thing he could not get his head around was a version of me that didn't have a chest.

i won't lie, that shit stung. the constant rejection of my gender expression had sort of eroded any romantic love i felt for him at that point, but he'd been my closest confidant for so long by that point that i really had to work through some shit about worthiness in the weeks after. it was just surreal to me that me With tits was good and worth being married to, but a hypothetical version of me with a flat chest was so repulsive that he'd rather end a marriage than endure it.

and like, i get being a boob guy (trust me), but damn.

p.s. some really interesting notes: he waited to have this conversation with me until literally the week after i received the first 5-figure portion of my book deal advance, which meant when we were settling affairs, it counted as "marital income" and he got half, and then he hired lawyers behind my back after we said we wouldn't do that.

in hindsight? maybe it was never about the tits at all. ;)

#alex talks #storytime #divorce #storytime with alex #personal #asks #i love talking about the bullshit that happens in my personal life it's very fun to me #if anyone else has questions about this or anything else u know where my inbox is babey #full disclosure? getting over him was EZ and genuinely took about 4 minutes. getting over my PARENTS? holy fuck #(they didn't take the divorce Or the gender very well)

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amitieos · 24 days

Text

toa anniversary munday!

Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.

Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!

Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.

Name: Nic

Pronouns: they/them

Birthday (no year): 14th July

Where are you from? What is your time zone? UK, GMT (or BST but don't get me started on daylight savings I'll explode)

How long is your roleplay experience? Does playing A Bug's Life on the playground when I was 5 count? If not, I started with rping HP characters with my friends when I was like 11-12 over MSN after school and whilst there have been breaks it's something I've always found myself coming back to.

How were you introduced to roleplaying as a whole? As above, I made a couple of friends on (unrelated) forums and we all just thought it'd be fun.

How were you introduced to TOA? I thought I missed rp and looked for an FE based rp.

Do you have any pets? Yes, all hail Catcat the Great.

What is your favorite time of year and why? (Season, holiday, general period) Summer. I hate the heat and humiditiy but once there's no daylight the seasonal affective disorder bass boosts my chronic mental health issues and it's just a bad time really.

What is your IRL occupation? I've gone back to uni to study Law :)

Some interests and things you like/enjoy? I love reading, I'm fascinated by linguistics and astrophysics, enjoy DnD and playing video games in my spare time. I'm a particular sucker for the Sims franchise.

What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? Recently I've been playing BG3, Stardew Valley, The Sims & Fields of Mistria but I'm a big fan of the Persona series and really, really excited about Dragon Age The Veilguard

Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: I don't really play Pokemon much anymore but I'll just say Sylveon I guess

Tell us some funfacts and trivia about yourself! I met the fourth Doctor when I was 11 and he complemented my vocabulary lmao. I once got published in a poetry anthology with a poem about Shadow the Hedgehog and my parents we so proud of me.

How did you get into Fire Emblem? I think I saw a review on TV

What Fire Emblem games have you played? I've attempted to play every game except 1/2/3/5/11, although I've really wanted to play Thracia I just *need* some QoL updates and controls. I haven't finished every single one because of lost/deleted saves and stuff but I've watched playthroughs and read up on scripts on everything I haven't actually played myself.

First & Favorite Fire Emblem games: My first was Fates but Jugdral, Magvel and 3 Houses are my favourite

List your 5 favorite Fire Emblem characters across the series! Elincia, Mercedes, Franz, Myrrh and ughhhh I can't choose between Chole/Yunaka/Sylvain so I'm cheating

Who was the first character ever to make you go “ooh I like this one in particular” and why? Can be any context and reason! I saw Ryoma in all that red armour and it grabbed my attention.

Any Fire Emblem crushes? 😳 Miss Mercedes if you're free Thursday night

If you’ve played (or are familiar with) the following games, who was your first S support? Who would you S support nowadays? - Awakening: Chrom, originally be accident but now on purpose :D - Fates: My first was Takumi and I didn't know what an S support was and was very confused. Nowadays usually Kaze or Laslow if playing F!Corrin and Orochi, Nyx or Charlotte if playing M!Corrin. Niles for either. - Three Houses: Mercedes. She's still my go to ofc but I'm also fond of Dorothea, Dimitri and Sylvain. If I'm playing M!Byleth Yuri or Ingrid - Engage: Yunaka was my first and now it's either Yunaka, Diamant or Chloe. Or Mauvier maybe hahfsdgfsd

Favorite Fire Emblem class? I love Pegasus Knights!!!!!!!

If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class and stats? Would you be playable? Probably a reluctant recruit who accidentally gets involved. Weirdly magic based armoured character.

If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? (Black Eagles, Blue Lions, Golden Deer, Church of Seiros, Those Who Slither in the Dark, unaffiliated civilian, other - for example Almyran) Either unaffiliated civilian or Blue Lions probably

If you were an Officers Academy student, what would be your boons, banes and potential budding talent? Boons: Lance, Reason, Heavy Armour Banes: Bow, Faith Budding Talent: idk Axes or Flying?

If you were an Engage character, which nation would you originate from? (Firene, the Kingdom of Abundance; Brodia, the Kingdom of Might; Elusia, the Kingdom of Knowledge; Solm, the Queendom of Freedom; Lythos, the holy land of the Divine Dragon; Gradlon, the desolate land of the Fell Dragon) No idea! Probably Elusia or Firene. The Solm heat would literally kill me.

How do you pronounce TOA? 🤔(separate letters, to-ah, other?) TOA ;) (like Noah)

Current TOA muses: Elincia & Mercedes

Past TOA muses? A lot but most memorable to me are Sylvain and Julia, though I'm so excited to see Sylvain in good hands <3

Who was your first TOA muse? If you no longer have them, can you see yourself picking them up again? Elincia and I still have her.

Do you believe you have a type of character you gravitate towards writing? White magic girlies though I'm trying to change things up.

Do you have characters or types of characters you don’t think you can handle writing, but wish you could? Hm, I wish I felt I could write more of the male characters I enjoy effectively. In most other fandoms I've written in most of my muses have been men but it's just not so in FE. I'd also love to write a villain okay I once genuinely considered Hilda FE4 lmao

What kind of scenes, situations etc do you believe you enjoy writing the most? (If you filled this out last year, has this changed in any way?) I like writing dialogue and characters bonding but I'm starting to like more action oriented scenes too.

Do you have any scenario in mind for your muse(s) that gets you thinking “man I hope I get to write this one day”? For Mercedes in particular I get excited to write her steel and strength, especially when it's combined with her gentleness rather than opposed to it.

Favorite TOA-related memories? Every thread I've writen with Elincia and Rua's Byleth <3

Present or past tense? I tend to default to present in TOA but usually past tense. I'm flexible though and will try and match my partner.

Normal size text, small text, no preference? I actually find small text easier to focus in on and read (I can find normal a bit too cluttered and it can send my eyes wandering lmao) but I'm perfectly happy to use normal text, it just takes me a bit longer to comb through.

Got any potential muse delusions to share? 😉 I can't see a shake up happening soon but... Zephia or Chloe are probably forerunners. I've thought about Palla and Astrid too but I'm not sure if I can see the longevity. Also Neimi, Myrrh and Rodrigue have sparked.... ideas. For muses I've written before, Julia is the most likely but I think she's having a nice break right now :)

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