#but like im just so fixated on how awful the game is and how the fans are even worse and i have this urge to argue forever

[tinta--branca]

fixating dummy hard on dos2 again but i only just learned that you can find Kniles’ childhood room in the black bull tavern?? also had no idea his mum sold her soul to adramahlihk,,, the layers of it all

[hecksupremechips]

Girl help I keep thinking about freaking persona 4

[infizero]

im going fucking crazy im going to bite someone’s head off kris and noelle deltarune making my brain fucking melt

[virtue-and-beneviolence]

This made me think how much hanma and draken have this funny enemies thing going on so imagine ur pissed at shuji or just sick of him not making a move yet? Y’all act like a couple but this mfer never made it official? Like why is his hand always in the back pocket of ur jeans? Why does this mfer offer u the last bite of his donut? No tell me why tf does he hold ur hand in a crowded place?🤨And when u lowkey joke about oh are u in love with me? And he laughs saying “don’t be silly doll” doll? (I’ll end him I swear) so u flirt with draken and yknow how he hates his guts that’s why u do so to piss him off and I think pissed shuji very sexy tbh wow 🤲🏽👍🏽and the thought of losing u to another man? And that man is bald with a braid? Aw hell naH Shawty he confessing so fast🤭😳

No because making draken the sacrificial goat is killing me lmao. Dw we won't do draken dirty here I've got a work-around.

also massive apologies to you vivi i'm sorry you knew abt this for an inordinate amount of time

Official.

it takes idiots (reader and shuji) many months, jealousy and miscommunication, and some prettiness to finally make it official.

cw: fem!reader, reader loses her temper and shuji is super needy so its a lil more subby!shuji smut, cream pie, unprotected sex (don't recommend, be safe out there), ye idk im gonna go pretend this isn't posted now, peace ✌️ ~2.2k

God but hear me out it starts at a toman party. Shuji and you are acting the way you always do. You're literally in his lap lounging in the corner of the couch. He's playing with the hem of your skirt, flipping the end between his fingers and rubbing the skin of your thigh. You're talking to Yuzuha who's occupying the chaise lounge. You haven't seen her in a while, she's been abroad with hakkai on so many modelling gigs lately. And she totally misreads the situation. She's like, so how is it, finally being together?

At first it's silly, though you have a tinge of want at the end of your words when you joke back with, "Well we've actually been married for three years, we just never found the right time to tell you all."

Yuzuha clocks it as a joke, but not as a sore spot for you. Or maybe she's so shocked and that's why she won't let it go that easily. "Hanma what the hell is wrong with you?"

"Undiagnosed ADHD and probabl-"

You give your friend a we're-going-to-talk-about-this-later look as a baffled Yuzuha cuts him off. "Wha- Hanma god damn it I meant-no- you know what I meant."

He offers a half shrug, "What? M'young."

That's when you excuse yourself blankly to get another drink. The insinuation that Shuji was still playing the field left you a bit numb. He wasn't. You knew that he wasn't because you were with him 90% of his waking hours. Hell you'd platonically (as platonically as you and Shuji ever really were) slept in his bed last night and woke up next to him. The bastard slept with his arms around you and snored in your ear half the night and he has the balls to joke like that? His words stung like a betrayal of the highest degree.

In the kitchen you found Draken looking for a pong partner. Perfect, you decide, a distraction with alcohol built in.

He tells you casually between turns he's fresh off (another) a break up with his on again off again girlfriend and you feel a dark part of you light up and a wicked idea is born.

You throw the pong game. To the point where Draken has to give you pointers. Has to get real close and talk lowly in your ear about how we need you to aim for the left one this time okay? His honeyed baritone sends shivers down your spine and you wonder for a second how much better this scenario would be if it were Shuji in your ear. Shuji's hands on your hip, his thumb dipping below the waist band of your skirt.

You huff a little. Nah fuck him. it's time to put your plan into action. You throw with your usual accuracy. You get the point. Out of the corner of your eye you see a certain skunk striped boy half-fixated on your game.

Showtime, you brain screams.

Excitedly you hop in Draken's grasp, throwing your arms around his neck and revel in his pleased laughter. "You're up again," he says as he puts you down and steps back. You stop him by the wrist, tug him back a little.

"Wait can you help me line it up again?" You bat your lashes a bit, playing at being drunker than you both know you are.

"Sure thing." You feel his warmth and relish in it, stalling and pressing into him. It's a miss, but the tiny peck under your ear he plants feels like a win.

The ball splashes in a cup on your side and you opponent, Kazutora smirks. Draken offers to drink it but you refuse. It's cheap beer. It's rough going down. Draken puts his hand between your shoulders and says that for such a pretty little thing you sure can hold your alcohol. The praise, more than the alcohol, warms your cheeks.

It's the last shot and you make it. You excitedly turn around in Draken's grasp and catch his lips in yours. You never intended for it to be a just celebratory peck, but you pull away, blushing a bit and stuttering apologies to make it appear so. Draken drawls out some praise for his pretty girl that won the game and draws you back in by the small of your neck and pulling the plush of your lower lip between his teeth.

You hear Kazutora cat whistle and know, you just know, it's meant to alert his buddy Shuji. Mentally you apologize to Emma but after she's regaled you and the girls with all the filthy details of the nasty make up sex she and Draken have, somehow you think she won't mind this little show, given that's all it was.

You hope she'll also forgive the two heavy punches Shuji lands on her Kennyboy before Kazutora pulls your next friend back and you can get back between the two again. People are staring, hoping for a fight. Some even boo when Emma whisks Draken away by the collar of his shirt and you try to push Shuji away.

"Fuck him," he spits and looks at you, "you too you little shit," he accuses and pulls you away by the wrist.

--

God, you're a certified sucker for that crazy look in his eyes. It's the first thing you think when Shuji slams the door of a spare bedroom in Pah Chin's house. You can't help it. There's nothing like Hanma Shuji slipping into his aggressive chaos mode on this earth. His irises glow with his emotion. And, wow was it easy to forget that he had you pressed against the door of this room with all his energy and attention fixed on you.

His fingers were knotted in your hair and you vaguely noted his growl asking you what the FUCK you thought you were doing.

"And who are you to ask that? I'm not yours. We're not together Shuji. Never have been. You're young, still right?" You shoot back

"Tch, that's what this is about?"

Maybe he had you caged against the door but liquid courage had you fighting back. You shove his chest. "Yeah. Yeah that's what this is about. What the fuck right do you have to treat me like I'm yours? You drive me everywhere. You hold my hand. You share your bed. You kiss my forehead. You make me breakfast. You know my secrets. You call me yours. But you can't make it official? What the fuck is up with that?"

With every sentence you've pushed Shuji back till he was perched on the corner of the bed.

"How the fuck is that fair, huh? You want me to be yours Shuji? Then tell me you're fucking mine." It's not a request. It's a demand. An ultimatum. A last chance to be honest with you.

He's looking up at you still as a statue, emotion so unreadable it unnerves you. You know how he wears almost any emotion. He rarely surprises you, and yet...

"I'm yours."

Shuji says it quietly at first like there's a lag between his awareness and speech. You're shocked he's caved so quickly and you stutter out an "Excuse me?"

"I'm yours." He repeats, more confidently. "God I'm so fucking yours." He's dragged you by the hips to straddle his lap and his lips are on yours and you swear you can taste the adrenaline on his tongue.

It's every bit as addicting as you guessed to properly make out with Shuji. You don't know how long you've been sat on him attached in this kiss but when you tug him by the hair to catch your breath and hear him groan at the tension you think you've died and gone to heaven. He's mumbling little "all fuckin yours, baby" up and down your neck and you feel his voice reverberating in your throat.

You grind down on the swell of his hardening dick and smirk a bit, lips ghosting his, "all?"

"All."

He's shimmying out of his pants, when you slide off his lap to kneel on the floor. You're met with a sizeable bulge hidden under tight black fabric and you damn near moan just at the sight of his freed dick springing up to tap his abs when you pull the last offending piece of fabric away. "Shuji you're so fucking beautiful." You say as you brush your fingers over his length carefully. His mouth opens in an amused playful smirk but you're on him immediately, stealing his words by licking a stripe from base to the tip that you pop right in your mouth. His jaw hesitates and then goes slack as you look up at him and take as much of him as possible.

You don't know what you expected but he is not quiet. He's mumbling praise and expletives and he exhales the hottest, breathiest moan you've ever had the pleasure to hear, let alone cause, when his tip hits the back of your throat and you swallow around it. You smile around him and want to giggle but you settle on humming around him. You force his fingers in your hair into a fist telling him to set his pace but he pulls you off instead. He's panting a bit and you feel a pang of pride in your chest.

"Need to fuck you. Need your pussy." He's already clamoring to help you up and discard your skirt. You do him the honor of not remembering his words as needy and stuttered as they were just this one time.

You climb over him to straddle his hips and stroke his cock once, twice, before running the tip along your slit. Rather than taking the tip you pivot your hips and pin his dick to his abs and run your soaking lips along his length. The sensation of his hot head nudging your clit brings you to your elbows, moaning in his ears.

Big hands grip your ass and grind you even harder into his dick. And between the warm stimulation and the nails digging into your skin you're already on the fucking edge, but you'll be damned if the first time you fuck Shuji you don't cum around his cock.

Finally after your relentless teasing you lined up his dick and hovered over him bobbing just enough to tease his tip with the velvety walls of your pussy. Shuji can barely whine a "fuck, doll stop teasing me cant take it," before you've sunk down and taken his cock whole and he's groaning and squeezing your ass, pulling you onto himself with bruising strength. You're suddenly laying on him again, collapsed down to your elbows with the power of your orgasm, while your fluttering walls only spur him on.

The weight of years of fantasies of this moment hit him at once and before you can process it, he's bear hugging you and rolling over to take the lead. Fuck, how could he not? After pining after you for so long, imagining getting to finally fuck you and promising himself that he'd make sure you wanted no one else when he was done with you.

It's endearing, you think, how he mutters as much to you over and over as he makes your pussy his as he fucks you through your high and beyond. You giggle and moan and gasp and think this is exactly how you pictured sex with Shuji to be needy, whiny, unexpected, a little rough.

You can read him so well that when his breath hitches just right, you wrap you legs around his waist, ignoring the stuttered warning of his own impending orgasm. Instead you gripped his hair, pulled his face to yours and breathed, "Gonna make me all fucking yours?" over his lips.

Immediately he pulled away from your kiss, unable to coordinate as he lost his composure and filled you, half locked in place by your legs. Muttered curses and filthy nonsense about how you feel around his is all he can get out until he's spent, finally latching his mouth on your shoulder to give an affectionate bite, not unlike bites you'd exchanged as friends a few hours before. You let him lay on you a minute or so to recover before he pulls back and sits up on his knees to look down at you, at his handiwork.

"Holy shit."

"Yeah," you agreed.

"Why haven't we done that before?"

"Hm...something about you being young?" You tease as he eases out of you.

"Yeah yeah, I get it. We already fucked that issue away," he jokes back and combs his fingers through some minor tangles in your hair, "S'not like I meant it anyway, y'know."

You catch his hand and tug it, wanting to be closer, "You're free to prove that to me any time."

In true Shuji form, he gasps in that goofy performatively dumb way he likes to as he brings his face close to yours for a kiss, "You mean I can do this again?"

[void-chara]

haha wow i hate how 90% of the celeste tag is just crossovers with other media. anyway here i am to contribute to the problem!

listen at least its a different crossover than usual. adding variety to the suffering. itzsubz celeste au because im mentally ill about him and also i love this game. yippee!!

as usual with my art posts, ramblings and explanations are below the cut

so first hi if ur here from the celeste tag Sorry! quick explanation of What This Is: Itzsubz_ is a youtuber and twitch streamer i enjoy a lot, and recently(a few months ago) he played celeste, which reactivated my celeste fixation after months of dormancy. and that lead to me doubling my goldenberry count lmao(before that i had golden for 1a 2a 1c 2c and 3c. currently i have goldens from 1a 2a and 1c-8c. currently working on 3ag and have been for a few months). so anyway yeah im Really Normal sooo i made a crossover au ! his youtube videos are cool but i cannot in good conscious recommend his streams. hes kind of awful. obsessed with him tho

also the color scheme makes it look like i put him in the badeline role but actually he takes the place of madeline. for Part Of Him/badeline-equivalent im gonna differentiate by givin more of the inhuman characteristics of his online persona and stuff.

now. if ur here for the guy, not the game, you may be asking yourself a very important question right now: why tf does he have tits. and the answer is this: you can take the transgender(character trait) out of celeste but you cannot take the transgender(allegory) out of celeste. so tbh why bother taking the transgender(character trait) out of celeste. sooo i made him bigender in the au. shes like if a girl was just some guy. yippee!! i do a little projection

the guy herself i drew the way i usually draw but with the background i got a bit more experimental and tried some new stuff! i really like how it turned out, especially the mountain and snow

the reason the canvas is so long is because i made this to be my new phone wallpaper since i wanted a new one. also heres some other versions! first is without filters, and the other two are alternate filters.

i loooove creating content which caters specifically to me and absolutely no one else in the world lmao. hope someone enjoys it anywya tho ! also i have plans for less niche art to be posted eventually. currently workin on an ivory drawing, and then after that i have a few plans for more celeste stuff(not crossover this time! ..and also a few more crossover.)

[inkyquince]

Daddy ur so brave for making such a FILTHY IF 😳😳 I can’t wait for it to come out :3

Jokes aside tho, it’s actually awe inspiring that you made a dark IF and from what I’ve seen in the IF community they’re quite vanilla at dark things. Like i remember one IF where one of the LI is their brother, i mean they’re not biologically related since the brother is an alien but i guess the sounds of raunchy stepbrother filthy alien sex is scary to them. And seeing you inky one of the best filthy disgusting porn writer making an IF honestly it is very amazing and i love you for it keep it up daddy can’t wait for your next content to drop out‼️

Dont let nobody stops you from making a disturbing content the shit you make is honestly so fucking great

ur so fucking sweet and im going to go fucking insane you little lad im scuttling over im tackling im kissing im wailing im peeing on the floor a wee bit

i just want to implement my favourite shit. a greying doctor who happens to be connected to one of the origins in a familial way, a deeply repressed guy who wants to fuck in werewolf form, a mean husband who wants to make MC their kept paramour, an openly horny nasty one, a younger sibling to another RO who openly WANTS TO smash no matter what- LEGITMATELY, emil/emilia is one of my favourites cuz they're so fucking sick in the head, no matter how you treated them in prior games, from sweet and kindly to dismissive and rude, they're going to develop a weird fixation on the MC just cuz of that and will get so nasty if ur romancing their sibling and want you to cheat. plus an opera singer who is the ex of one of the others who will either be such a fucking bitch to you or will be so weird and possessive and obsessive if you show interest in them both or just them-

inhale.

im just happy i get to implement my favourite tropes plus making an MC i would wanna play with the different origins. like you got bastard mc, adopted mc, rich bitch mc, orphaned mc, etc and URH

im so excited to work way more on it

and you, you sweet, sweet, horny anon, i kiss on the lips for being so fucking nice and sweet

also they should have had nasty alien brother sex in that one game, weak

[definitelynotshouting]

hi ! i just read all of the hunger au tag and #($+$(()33-(# . Hm . God awful . I am a worse person because of it /j . I have a lot of thoughts !!

First off , i find the conversion of biology and software fascinating , specially in the concepts of first worlds ! Like , you mentioned how players are more often spawned rather than born , and i personally interpret their first worlds as a sort of prenatal stage . think abt it , they're still connected to the universal code , still relying on it to learn and advance , and after they shed it and are finally "born" as themselves , able to access the rest of the world .

also , lots of body horror in this au . like , code , right ? i keep imagining the universal code as sort of veins , tendrils freshly born players are still teetered with , the connections grian has to put effort into severing as fleshy tendrils twisting and clinging unto players . much wet !

speaking of which , listeners , dude . i think genuinely they r much more scarier than watchers because they're not noticeable , their effects r not threatening , they don't stick to you n eat your insides , they get into your system and /change/ you , fuse into you , how many people have been affected by it ? even worse when you take into account they connect with other infected , n worse when they work towards Goals . girl what goals could the listeners want ????? I'm terrified .

And grian finally !!!!!! For al this time I've been looking at grian as having an eating disorder , cause , well , he does . It's so interesting , he ticks almost all the boxes . The guilt , the hiding it through clothing , the fact he's thinking of food all the time , damn . I'm also eternally fixated on the image of , like , the existential horror on it . he was created by sucking himself dried of code , he broke out of his own skin . something something caterpillars completely melt themselves in their cocoon before emerging as butterflies something something .

anyhow , such fun !!! I'm definitely gonna draw a lot for this , you're a great writer fr grrrr -🔆

Im really glad you've picked up on these concepts and themes i've carefully folded into this au, because it means they're coming across really clearly!!! :D thats how i know im doing my job as a writer, so im very pleased because all of these things you've mentioned (except maybe the Greater Code as tendrils) have been baked into the au with great deliberation

Spawned Players and their first worlds are absolutely very prenatal in nature-- i described to a friend a few months ago that a spawned Player's relationship to their first server, and the universe at large, is like an "umbilical cord" that they eventually detach from as they grow older :] how fast they go through that process depends ofc on the individual Player, but that was the general idea behind that concept!!

There's definitely a TON of body horror in this au WKDNWJDJSJ thats one of the first things i remember cw-ing for when explaining this au for the first time. Actual historical record right here LMFAO:

I personally tend to see the Greater Code as this sorta like. Fabric of binary, that forms the base for what everything in this universe is made of. Within it are echoes of recycled information, code that comes together to form the impressions of old meaning-- you could almost think of them as ghosts. No longer conscious, but emulating fragments of what they once were. Also, any and all body horror imagery is the full fault of my cousin, whom i consider the ultimate Horror Guy in my life, as well as his favorite video game, Dead Space, which has. so much meat in it, gods bless<3

Listeners are absolutely more scary than Watchers imo; i was sorta thinking of cordyceps as well as the mycorrhizae when i was coming up with them!!! There's something utterly terrifying about being so subtly changed and just not knowing why. You can see and hear Watchers; their presence is palpable even if you dont know what they are. But a Listener? They're quiet. Symbiotic but deeply, utterly invasive. Definitely more frightening on an existential level than a Watcher, which i find suitable for something modeled after fungi.

As for Grian, he 100% has an eating disorder. My portrayal of that in the au is very deliberate, even though its not directly stated. So im glad you picked up on that!!! And if you do draw anything for this for the love of gods send it here or tag me in the post i will DIE i love fanart and i am guaranteed to scream about it for a million years AUGH

[libras-interactives]

Hi! I just wanna say how amazing and cool u r for making UtDM, like dawg im not a fortune teller but i can TELL you're gonna grow and get big one day. Btw i remember sending a question in ur fanfic tumblr acc and im just gonna ask it here. Will you be willing to make a Filipino or a mixed option in the UtDM game? Its alr if you won't since this was just a suggestion. I really don't mean to make you hurry abt it since coding takes SERIOUS WORK, i know cuz i got a older cousin who codes alot and he look like he runs on monster juice tbh. Again thank you so so SO much for existing, living and blessing us with you amazing fanfics ( including the other fanfic writers) and games that you have made to entertain and let us eat that shit up. You are amazing and we all love you!!

Aw ty for the kind words!!! I really appreciate yall reading and enjoying my silly fixations 😭

Also i remember that message! I responded privately, maybe it didnt go thru? Anyhoo Im adding Filipino; it was asked for earlier. Mixed won't be an option just bc I'd have to make dozens of variations of what the MC is mixed with - and which side of the family they were raised by, etc. Honestly I'd like to move past the character creator and focus on progressing the story.

[keifeli]

thoughts on these guys?!

HOLYYY SHIT THATS TRICKSTAR im gonna answer this honestly btw

1. LOVE HOKKE HES SO CUTEEEEEEEE u have no idea how excited i am for the climax event im gonna throw up from excitement again :3 one of the funniest characters in the game ngl people just don't know that because nobody ever reads their stories WAHHH.. im stuck on what else to put im sorry hokke ilysm READ SAKURAFES BTW

2. SUBAAAA ♡_♡ at first i was kinda "ehh" but as i gradually read more about him i was like HOLY SHIT? THERE IS SO MUCH ABOUT HIM?????? WHY NOBODY TALK ABOUT HIM..... i adore his fake genki character archetype whatever its called i actually cried when i found out why jin has to take subaru and lock him in the infirmary?? if i keep talking about him this post will be 27 pages long so i will end this with 10/10 best character in the whole game actually

3. i relate to this guy SOOOO bad actually my eyesight too got worse due to gaming habits ⚫️_⚫️ i love loveee reading older stories with him because then i can read newer stories and gush about how much he's improved!!!!! whether it be with his fear of cameras or his overall talent as an idol :3 a lot of people think he's ugly because of the glasses but personally i prefer the glasses! they make him look cute!

4. i was actually obsessed with mao when i first started playing because i was so heavily fixated on the ! era student council LOL. begging my 10 followers to go read bigbang reflection because aughhhhh,,;,;,; mao,,,,,, i truly love how he sees through subarus facade and can tell when baru is actually bothered/upset especially when he used to see him differently in the basic main story! can i also mention how awesome he is btw btw btw btw HIS SPPS WHERE HE BREAKDANCES ARE INCREDIBLE I STARE AT THEM IN AWE

Tdlr i love trickstar thank you

[spookieloop]

You were rhe first to reblog it and im glad you liked it! Figure if I kept it gen enough works for both good and evil durges and im kinda obsessed with the durge gortash relationship ngl

Oh I'm all IN on the GoreTash ship lol.

I ghostwrite romance (usually dark romance) for a living, so I'm essentially 98% of the time fixating on romantic/toxic plot points and details, and Durge and Gortash's whole THING just utterly destroys me, whether or not the Durge is trying to be a better person.

(Plus, the Dark Romance I ghostwrite is usually required to have a happy/nice ending, which usually means the clients want the MCs to end up as better people, so Evil!GoreTash -can't remember who came up with that shipname, I think it may have been Gortrash who did, but either way I love it- is super indulgent for me because I can let them stay awful lol).

I haven't played yet, but I'm obsessing over the plot, and I'm going to eventually make a Dark Urge who struggles to try and fit in to the world and hide her Urge, for safety's sake, while she's coping with the amnesia, but who finds great relief once she reaches Moonrise and people remember her. It's going to be like coming home. She's going to reclaim her position as Bhaal's Chosen and be thrilled to "have her life back" no matter how much progress she seemed to make before recovering the scraps of her old life. (Honestly, I appreciate the fact that Baldur's Gate 3 actually lets us play a genuinely villainous character without it falling flat. I usually play goodguy types anyway in stuff like Dragon Age, but so few games let you actually ally with the villain and not have the villain decide to screw you over at the last minute. It genuinely feels very TTRPG with the level of Choice involved.)

I do fully appreciate the tragic nature of Gortash's suddenly unrequited feelings if Durge has become a new, better person though. That has to be agony, having one person who he feels genuinely cares for him, and they've come back, they're still alive, but they're different now. He won't beg them to love him again, but he'll do everything but.

It's just SUCH a good story no matter how you slice it.

[pawtistics]

harrow, for the ask game :)

hi hi sniffles i appreciate tgis so much !! headcanon asks !

realistic: uhhhhhh i dont know if this counts <33 but theres So Much evidence tgat i feel confident in saying that harrow is literally the autism/schizophrenia overlap/venn diagram. shes got both

while it may not be realistic it is hilarious: i like giving harrow my exact height (4'7). she is itty bitty teeny tiny

heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends: struggling to draw the line btwn hc & analysis here. im just gonna throw out a few !

reverend parents abused harrow in multiple ways. john and ianthe too. unknowingly or not they all worsen her psychosis

harrow wants to die for love just as much as she wants to live for it (her original plan during the cyth fight, her lobotomy, "let me live long enough to die at your feet", "and you walked to your death like a lover"). vice versa for gideon, too.

fixated on death itself & uses her lyctorhood to push herself as close as she can get — maybe even in a desperate attempt to sense the forgotten thing she Knows is missing. not with the intent to die — cost too much for it — just allowing things to get far away and fuzzy with the barest hint of arms around her again. kind of like how she pushes the bones in her hands nearly to the point of breaking just because she Can . like her parents taught her.

unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own: fashionable harrow. (stone) femme harrow. i am Sorry. verymuch a personal thing and she is 1000% more androgynous/genderless than anything . but femme doesnt necessarily equal Femininity in the traditional sense !! femmes can be all of that as well!!

GOD the way she centers and values this one (1) butch. her shitty lil dramatics. How she takes forever to get ready for the fifth's party while gideon gets ready in 15. same thing in the ball au where she worries over her image. when she dresses cool i do believe its on accident but she DOES dress cool and she DOES care abt that kind of thing, to an extent :] modern aus included !!

DETOURING TO GRAB QUESTIONING FEMMES BY THE SHOULDERS SO LOVINGLY You can do whatever you want forever you are no less femme for having a fucky gender!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's a role and a dynamic and a community and you get to make it your own !!!!!!!! MWAH

bonus unrealistic hcs: gideon somehow prevented harrow from dying when her parents did. maybe even stopped her herself. And in their own horrible way theyve been looking out for each other even back on the ninth when it comes to garbage mental health.

[hecksupremechips]

Maybe my opinions on things I like are too harsh sometimes 😞

[askaniritual]

So Aradia's whole deal is that she had actually been killed by Vriska as a result of the larping her Vriska, terezi, and tavros were a part of. This in turn caused terezi to notify doc scratch of Vriska's theft of one of his items and he blew it up, which caused vriska to retaliate against terezi by blinding her. As a result of her being dead and having time powers she's kind of the one that sets a lot of things in motion for the troll players behind the scenes. Shes also one of the two trolls to godtier and actually holds off jack before reuniting with the living players. She's also one of the few characters that survives the universal John retcon. Post resurrection she really has a fixation on death still but mainly through this lens that death is necessary and a healthy endpoint to all things especially things that overstay their existence like Lord English. Overall she's not the deepest of characters but she's kinda really inspiring to me because she spent so much of her life already dead and subject to the whims of fate that when she's alive again she's taking full advantage of it and living with zeal. Also Megalovania which is more commonly thought of as sans undertale's theme was her theme first! So yeah she's a relatively minor character but I just think she's awesome. My fave convos with her are ones where she talks to an alt Dave about death and her explaining to John she just wants to see how the universe will fall apart upon Lord English's arrival. I also wish she interacted with rose and jade more because I think her and rose would bond on their sort of macabre views on things and jades arrested development and separation from people in her session reminds of some if things aradia went through as well. Especially since both were robots for a bit. Overall I just think she's a really cool character!

im ngl i regularly completely forget abt sgrub and that the trolls played their own game prior to getting involved w the humans' game and that they actually have like a fair amount of pre-canon history.

based on this and what i read of her on the wiki, it seems like aradia is very much a Creepy Dead Girl tm but it seems like she gets kinda silly with it which i absolutely love for her. love to watch a character who's just in it for the universe-ending lols because it's always an interesting challenge to give a character that nihilistic compelling relationships and motivations. also looooooove a character who used to be an organic creature and is now fully inorganic i think there are many interesting things to be said about that continuum (as you have probably seen from my trigun posting). its giving me Marsha Johansson "No-Girl" vibes if ykwim

i am awed and inspired by your willingness to go to bat for aradia tysm for sharing your shrimp vision with me! i always love to hear abt what specifically interests ppl about the characters they choose to fixate on in any given piece of media

[insertive-not-assertive]

Do you have any Advice on Changeling the lost?

make your changeling as sick as possible

jk jk sorry dude im not sure what you mean like, advice for the game in general? ive never played ctl so i guess all i can offer is what ive heard and read?

ok so, play the most recent version of the game (2e i think its called) because its better, but also take it with a grain of salt. everyone ive heard from so far improvises on the game and makes homebrews, and theres so much creative room in this game that its perfect for exploring what the fuck ever you like in a ttrpg.

its even the kind of game you could just spend time making shit up for yourself if you dont want to/cant play it, as ive been doing.

like i said ive never played so idk about the finer mechanics of gameplay and whats balanced and whats not, but when it comes to character creation i REALLY encourage you to dig into ur imagination and bring out a magic creature you wanna be or youd wanna make an oc out of

what kinda changeling do you wanna be/play as? what made your character that way? what do they do after they escape Arcadia?

check out seemings/kiths/courts and then mess that dude UP, give them sick powers and weaknesses

you can be kithless lmao, some people are just too nebulous to categorize

the courts all have a different emotion for how they deal with being a changeling. you dont have to pick a court, but if u do id say to ask your character what being in that court means to them.

oh also if youre making up a Fae, try to make it as fucked up and cool as possible. theyre so weird and monstrous at times. i just picked my changelings keeper from the ones already made (because hes awful in a great way) but i think itd be cool if more people made their own?

ppl have explained this better than me, but the thing that changelings have that fae will almost never have is the support of other changelings. fae are so concerned with themselves they cant understand banding together to live like changelings do (which makes them still human). so i wanna say keep in mind that the best weapon changelings have against fae is ironically the power of bonds (motleys, freeholds, and courts) this is the heart of the game imo.

im bullshitting my way thru this here, i dont know how much you know about ctl already, but i can point you towards the stuff ive found these last two weeks ive been fixated on it, if you wanna look at all that stuff? you can skip all that junk i said above and just go thru this stuff. its kinda dead out there but still good:

one of the forums!

a forum post with a bunch of supplementary material!

codex site that i havent rly explored yet but its probably excellent

this guy made character sheets for almost every white wolf game

book 1e(quality might vary)

book 2e

theres other books but i havent found them yet! like winter masques!

@qm-vox's essays about seemings and courts and changeling stuff!!! link to their summer court post because thats my favorite one obviously

im always hesitant to recommend reddit to anyone, but i like reading the whitewolfrpg subreddit to read other ppls takes on ctl sometimes x]

i dont like video essays or watching ppl play ttrpgs, but if you do i guess i recommend that if you wanna hear more about it? im sure theres stuff on youtube

read the white wolf wiki if you want, but just know the info there is a little scattered and hard to put together. i started reading the books bc i wanted to put it together

sorry if you wanted to know something specific? i can only vaguely point you in a direction! im still learning abt all the finer points of this game myself

[revivisection]

its night time you know what that means! this is my diary now. very long week recap ahead.

my teeth are cool and good kind of now. they're actually still pretty awful but my front are work in progress they look mostly fine now and im not so vigilant at hiding my mouth :) not without a week's worth of pain and agony recovery but. you knoow. i will have to go through that again at some point oh well thank god for ibuprofen except it wears off before i can take another one. my upper lip was incredinly inflamed for a few days, bad experience.

you know you never really think about hpw much you use your mouth or just like. feel your mouth generally experience the life experience of having a mouth until there's problems with it. crazy how that works. i for one would have a much better time not having a mouth it's rather disgusting. ideal form i simply absorb energy through airwaves, or perhaps plug myself in to charge

after that i had to enroll in courses i was like surely i will have a fine and okay time. <-full of hubris. i slept through the first hour of course enrollment because i went to sleep at 6am and it opened at 9. so im now on two waitlists which probably wont let up. going to take latin though, going to become more pretentious just you wait. i think this is what you would call a "dark academia moment" but i dont think i actually know what dark academia is. school hasn't started yet but im having the biggest fucking imposter syndrome everyone who has ever told me how smart i am is a fucking liar.

had a fun lil trivia club day with some trivia club buddies. believe it or not, we did trivia. exciting, i know. anyways scratch what i said before whenever i get the right answer in trivia club i am literally the smartest man alive. why do all my friends have absolutely ancient editions of trivial pursuit (the words of someone who doesn't own any board games)

and yesterday i hung out with my dear friend @threecirclingbuzzards!! she let me scavenge through her big bag of miscellaneous patches it was very fruitful. my vest is very empty because i have to make everything myself and i simply do not. so now i have more things to put on it, the real question is when im actually going to sew. it was also cool because we are like brain linked we are like that image of clown-to-clown communication dont need to speak coherently because like. i get it. she gets it. we get it. the clown part is especially true because we were like. what to teens do. hang out at the mall. genius. and then we got there and it was two minutes from closing. genius. at the dollar store i got minecraft stickers god i love minecraft i will be forty fucking years old and not tire of minecraft

over the course of my mouth recovery time i listened to youtube videos to try and distract myself when falling sleep and i listened to a video about the evil within 1. i dont need to give background information but i will anyways.. back in like whenever of this year early this year some time this year i was scrolling through the discussion page of the tumblr sexyman wiki and there was a suggestion post for stefano valentini and i was like. woah. ive seen that man before. ive watched my fair share of oxbox/oxtra vids in my lifetime. and then i proceeded to go crazy. something about him makes me go absolutely nuts like awooga etc. who fucking knows. anyways i was content to never know anything about the evil within beyond that stefano valentini is like absurdly attractive until i watched that video about the evil within 1 while mildly Out Of It and i developed a very sudden crush on ruvik so now i know some things about the evil within. how was your day. another fucked up evil guy who i am compelled by. i cant fix him i cant make him worse but i CAN look at him from afar. all ive been able to draw lately is just ruvik faces idk man he's my latest fixation i guess. got him on the mind (except for when i was catching up on the patho tag today. i love my weekly spam reblogging from the patho tag except this time it's two weeks worth of posts becuase by god i was having a bad time)

perhaps i should actually watch a lets play of tew so i can know like. what the game is like in full properly and shit. shhhhh you dont see my incomplete patho2 save. i would play more horror games if i werent a little bitch, but im not so instead i just play stupid long fantasy rpgs. the sole reason i havent finished pathfinder kingmaker is because of that stupid goddamn darven quest oh my god i hate that man i hate that quest i need to speedrun it get it over with so i can enjoy the rest of the game but i simply cannot take it when the FUCK is he going to show up how much fuckng time needs to pass where are you bitch i need to xget this out of the fucking way so the hellknights stop crashing my place fucking my shit up i hate it her.e.

i wrote all of this because i am insuch! a mood today. idk whats up last nigh t i passed out instantly fell asleep died went to purgatory the moment i laid down on my bed like in an instant ive never been so sleepy in my life. and today i am incredibly humid but more than that the time actually melted away. like pretend time is a stick of butter in my hands except i preheated my hands in the oven for several minutes and the butter didnt even bother to melt so the preheating didnt matter it just slipped off my stupid little fingers. i woke up blinked now its night time. now nearly twelve hours have passed what the fuCK was i doing. nothing. i have no idea how this time passed i feel out of it (different) a different kind of out of it who knows maybe this is my natural tooth recovery time but instead for going outside two days in a row and having fun. this is my body and mind telling me to have less fun. wlel fuck you body and mind im hanging out with friends AGAIN tomorrow. see how you like that fucker. or maybe im just a little baby and its because i forgot to sleep with my stuffed animals last night. i have a build-a-bear longhorn i love him with my life i named him after my wife (artemy) he keeps me company because all i do is sit and rot.

also we havent read new pages of this dark endeavour in like11 days oops. the review WILL happen eventually okay i have so much to say about that wretched novel just when the summer book club completes it

[television-pil0t]

POV: your a little too functional so your mental illness isn’t taken seriously

I’m one of the 15% of autistic people that can work a job. This makes it hard to “prove” I’m autistic. Im good enough at masking to not get exhausted and shut down easily and while having a quite personality to make it seem like I’m actually cool when I’m not. Im not ok a lot of the time. I can’t stand for long periods. I stress myself out. I think to much. I have outburst. I get overwhelmed and just sit in the bathroom. I’ve learned how to suppress my daily panic attack but sometimes it’s just to much and I cry. My eyes fill with tears and rub my eyes and blink aggressively to stim so nobody notices. My eyes are always red and puffy from how much I silently cry I just get a reputation for being high all the time. This combination of being blasian, red eyes, short, and already dressing extremely casually all the time has gotten me out of a lot of trouble. I have trouble pressing my emotions. I hate talking about my issues. I do repeating tasks all the time. Locking my door over and over and over, count the starts. Walking in a curtain pattern. Left foot always first. Breathing in a pattern. I give myself panic attacks by being alive I worry about so much. Everything can go wrong. I have my like set yet I’m to lazy to do any of it. I play games all day when I could be making them. I’ve cried while having sex so often I’m so good at hiding it. Even in person. I shake constantly. I choke on my own words. I try and not laugh because I hate how it sounds. My voice is awful. I hate my face and when I don’t look like who I really am. I’m scared of my reflection as much as I jump when I see my own shadow. I hear voices. So often. I hear whispers. Breathing that isn’t mine. Moaning and crying and laughing. I get dizzy thinking about it. I am hyper fixated on the government. My special interest is space and time and reality. I have a tendency to be hyper fixed on music, games and art more than anything. I will play the same game for days to months on end. Craving it. Thinking about it 24/7 watching videos of the game AS I play the game. I will listen to the same song over and over and over and over and over. I’ve gone a whole week listening to the same song and I still love it. I will look at artists and want to draw exactly like them. Studying them so harshly. I know so many art movements it’s insane. Im hard to be romantically intimate with because I hate being touched yet I need it so bad. I hold my breath and stiffened everything my own boyfriend touches me. I’m horrified. I shake. I stiffen and try to relax and breath until it’s over. But I don’t want it to be over. I love the smell of him. The taste of him. Even tho I find kissing disgusting. I love the taste of his tongue. I’m a extremely sexual person. By my own design? Maybe. I’m scared to be abandoned so I let it happen. Most of the time I push for it. I’m very rarely actually horny. I was today and yesterday. Excruciatingly so. Other than that.. eh. Im extremely optimistic while being real. I think corecore could be a genuinely movement. A nonverbal protest against globalization, capitalism, hate speech etc while my bf sees it as a tiktok trend and nothing more. I see the good in the bad as much as I possibly can. The good in the internet, in government, in police. Because you have to see every side to even begin to argue. I understand a lot yet play dumb because I’m both scared to be wrong and scared to impress beyond levels I can’t build upon. I think demons and gods exist just as much as I believe the universe itself is it’s own entity. I believe in rituals and prayer. Manifestations and more. I believe that I’m to codependent on my bf and once a year every year he realizes I’m not good for him yet he always comes back. That is something I understand. I know no matter how much I say “I won’t take him back next time” I will. I know I can be a push over just as much as I can be mean. I know nobody as ever seen me be mean to my fullest. I know I could make anyone cry if I wanted to. I know I can kill.