#but then im scared that if i bring this up I'll just make the situation weird idk

[holduwheremyheartis]

.

[starlightazriel]

bee 9

series desc: modern best friends > lovers (fem reader) tattoo artist az

warnings: 18+, az acting crazy and toxic haha, arguing/angst, just the beginning of the groveling, simp behavior hahaha, drug/alcohol addiction, reader struggling, heart break, time jumps, aa, depression mess, az is literally falling apart at the seams, don't expect good decisions from reader lol she's hurting that's all ima say

a/n: wow I know I ain't shit this took me so long I'm sorry angst central too ik

wc: 3.8k

other parts can be found on my az masterlist <3

nine

"Say the word Bee, I'll knock on his door and knock him out." His jaw was tight, eyes dark with the desire to inflict pain. Real pain, sometimes that side of Azriel scared me, these days it would only make my panties wet.

"Im fine Az," I wiped tears from my face with the back of my sleeve, my chest tightened slightly at his willingness to put himself at risk for my naivety. "Hes not worth it anyway," I added, trying desperately to swallow the lump in my throat.

"Well that youre right about. Tried to tell you he didnt deserve you," he pauses, his face looking displeased. There's a moment of silence and it made me wish I had the courage to fill it with my feelings for him. "Please stop looking so sad though. Bings will help," he smirks, trying the only way he knew how to lighten the mood, he held up his bong, already freshly packed. I sighed softly, letting a small smile tug at the corner of my lips despite the ache I felt in my chest.

"Yeah they might," I smirk a little bit, and take the bong from him, taking one of my little baby hits, I shove the bong back in his direction, coughing obnoxiously despite the small hit. Normally he would make fun of me, I figured he was sparing me the embarrassment in light of the current situation.

"I can kick his ass," he repeats and I just shake my head at him. I didn't doubt it either— when it came to me, Az didn't have any limits. He would go down swinging for me, no matter who it was.

Thinking back on that memory... It made me feel sick, that now he was the one to hurt me.

I had made the mistake of trusting Azriel too much. I knew better. I knew he wasn't ready for this and still I let myself live in some little fantasy world for weeks. And now... Now I was dealing with the consequences.

My heart was shattered.

Incomparable to my insignificant couple of break ups in the past... This was so much worse.

Az... My Az. Maybe not my Az after all.

He clearly couldn't even handle a relationship.

Or maybe... The alternative made my stomach sink.

Maybe he knew the entire time that he was moving and he was just passing the time until he did? Az wouldn't do that... Would he?

You can know someone forever... As soon as there are drugs involved... Well, nothing is guaranteed.

It seemed to be just as hard for me to admit that he had a problem than it was for him. I hated it, but this pain— it made me see things more clearly, see him more clearly.

I couldn't bring myself to block him. I did have to turn my phone off for a while because not picking up was just becoming hard. 39 missed face time calls, 12 missed regular calls, and a handful of text messages that I was leaving on read.

baby please just talk to me

i'm so sorry shit was so fucking stupid

please come home

bee i swear i'll come over there and drag you out of that house by your hair

you know i didnt mean that

im sorry

i need you bee, don't shut me out

just talk to me

i'll stop drinking so much i'll do whatever please just fucking talk to me

cass is a fucking idiot nothing happened i swear baby i didn't fuck anyone.

The messages were spaced out minutes between some, hours between others. I couldn't help myself when I typed out a reply to the last one.

how do you know you didn't fuck anyone? do you even remember? You were getting your fucking grind on with a random ass bottle girl. or maybe she wasn't random lol who fucking knows with you. and you had your face in tits Az. Tits. WERE TOUCHING YOUR CHEEKS. AND YOU WERE SMILING LIKE YOU LOVED EVERY FUCKING SECOND. AND I BET YOU DID CUS YOU LOOKED HIGH OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND.

It was only seconds before he read it and was typing.

i didn't fuck anyone. i only want you. i'm just a dumbass. bro please do not do this shit to me. i will do ANYTHING to make this up to you that's on literally everything.

And another one.

you don't have a choice anyway and i swear if i catch you outside with any of these mother fuckers yo youre both done

And another.

its not a threat its a warning don't play with me

I groaned in frustration and tossed my phone to the side. It was all so... Exhausting. My chest quite literally hurt. And the audacity, please don't do this to him?

He did this to us.

And why the fuck did he think he owned me? I hated that it made my heart flutter— bottle girls, titties, Vegas. I reminded myself.

Sick.

I had confessed everything to my mom the first day I had came back to my parents house, which in hindsight I wished I hadn't. Knowing me... I would be back in Azriels bed within days of being back, my cheeks burned at the thought. No matter what he did, it didn't change the way I now knew how he could make me feel.

She had always loved Az, since day one... He had practically been a part of our family at one point, joining our family dinners every night, even my dad and him had a certain respect for each other. 'Some people are just better off as friends,' was my mom's response to the whole ordeal. Maybe she was right, but I didn't like it, not now.

How could we go back to that?

Was it possible to go back to that?

-

The stress, the heaviness of my heart... I couldn't stop myself from swiping a cig from my dad's secret stash in the garage. I was now sat on the rocking chair on my parent's front porch, debating on what I was going to do when I returned home. I had to go soon, it had already been weeks now I was starting to dip into my old wardrobe.

I had been commuting to class even though it was much farther than Azriel's apartment. I just didn't know what to say when I saw him. I didn't even know how to bring up the fact that I knew he was moving. Did he plan on telling me? What had been his plan for my living situation if he didnt have the apartment anymore? Had he even thought about it?

"So you're smoking now?" his voice causes me to jump, my heart nearly leaping from my chest as my head snaps to Azriel who's standing there, one hand shoved in his pocket other hand gripping a small bouquet of flowers. Scarred fingers against delicate stems, my cheeks turned pink remembering what he had done to me with those fingers. That feeling soon turned to anger remembering what he else he had done, he's frozen now, maybe half way up the stone path leading to my parents front door.

"Jesus Az what the fuck?" I breathed out, exhaling a shaky breath, my tone laced with a venom I had never used with him before. "You scared the fuck out of me, what are you even doing here?"

"You know what I'm doing here," his voice is soft but slightly strained, my stomach twists at the pain I can feel, radiating off of him. I didnt know how he did that, he was always able to change the air around me— like I was so hyper aware of him that I could sense his feelings.

"Az-"

"I love you," he cuts me off, my breath hitches, his cheeks are slightly pink, hand still shoved into his pocket. I set the burning cigarette down on the can beside me, I tried to swallow the lump forming in my throat.

So long.

I had waited to hear those words for so fucking long. And now, here, under these circumstances— it didnt feel how I imagined it would. It didnt feel how it was supposed to.

"I love you too Azriel you know I do but I-"

"But what? You dont want me because Im so fucked up right?" His voice drops slightly, his throat bobbing and I noticed his grip tighten on the bouquet in his hand. His face was soft— pained, and my heart cracked again, remembering that boy so many years ago bruised and bloody with that same heartbroken face of betrayal, and now I had done that to him. "Im sorry, Im so fucking sorry please—"

"I didn't say that," I mumbled, my heart felt like it was bleeding in my chest, like there would be nothing left once he walked away. He didn't dare to step closer. "I just- I need some time Az," I mumbled softly and he closed his eyes for a minute before tugging at his hair, huffing out a frustrated breath. He looked like he would get down on his knees for me, like he would beg me if I asked him to.

"I know what that means Bee," he huffs out another small breath, his face slowly contorting into that hard cold stare I knew him to hide behind. "Anyway," he breaths out, looking away from me. "I'm going to change your mind, we—" he struggles again before giving up, I could see his eyes were bloodshot as he got closer, dark circles prominently underlining them. "Here," he finally says, he shoves the bouquet in my hand, there was an envelope taped to the side of it with my name on it.

"I'm coming home soon Az," I mumble, though, I didn't even know if I was ready for the conversation the two of us would be having. "I told you we could talk then," I add and he sighs, stepping back off of the porch.

"I'll see you soon then," he muttered softly and just shrugged his shoulders, I could tell he wanted to run to me... He wanted to wrap me in his arms and kiss me. He wanted to strangle me also— I could see that too, that deep rooted need for control, to make me see things his way. I couldn't blame him— it stemmed from years of physical abuse, traumas I would never truly be able to understand.

"Go home Az. Goodnight, thank you, for the flowers," is the last thing I say before walking back inside shutting the door behind me, in his face. I didnt watch him walk away, that short conversation had been painful enough. I put the flowers in some water and tore open the mini envelope despite how angry I was with him.... Seeing him, made me crave him so much more.

'I could lose every single thing I have in this world but I can't lose you. I miss you. Please stop shutting me out. I can't take much more of this Bee.'

His handwriting was rushed— desperate messy scrawl, guilt twisted in my gut. I couldn't help it... I had nothing to feel guilty about and yet... Imagining him alone, needing me, missing me... Enough to buy flowers and scribble out a little note. More than I'd ever seen him do for any other woman.

I couldn't fall for it.

My chest tightened and tears welled up in my eyes. Why did he have to fuck everything up? It had been so perfect. Leave it to a fucking man to ruin everything.

-

Azriel swallowed the bile that rose in his throat as he stared blankly in front of him at all of the faces looking back at him. His palms were sweaty, ears hot with embarrassment and he couldn't stop tapping his foot. He had opted not to get up and stand at the front, feeling much more secure in his seat toward the back of the room.

"Hi, uh, my name is Azriel, I'm twenty five, and Im um— Im an alcoholic," it was the first time he'd ever said it out loud, it tasted horrible on his tongue. "I've um I've been addicted to drinking alcohol probably for about ten years- Got me into other- shit and I'm here today because I fell in love with my best friend and um- I don't want to lose her. Never tried to quit drinking before— never really believed I had a problem but— yeah, here I am," his voice had gotten quieter as he finished and he realized he was rambling. His cheeks burned, he hated all the eyes on him, hated that he was the center of attention. And he was craving a line, bad.

His introduction was followed by many 'Hi Azriels,' which only made him feel more uncomfortable. They tried to make him feel welcome, tried to relate to him— get him to open up. He thought he might explode but he listened though. He listened to each and every persons story that shared. And when it was over the leader gave him a small white chip, service, unity, recovery. A pledge to a new beginning, toward sobriety.

He sighed and shoved it into his pocket, he was sitting on the step now, to go coffee cup in his hand, black obviously. Isn't that what recovering alcoholics did? Drink black coffee and smoke cigarettes?

"Can I bum one?" a male voice asks and next thing he knows he's sitting down next to him, he was a bit older, maybe 40.

"Sure," he mutters and pulls a cigarette from the pack and extends it to him, he recognized him from inside the meeting.

"It's Max, if you didn't catch it in there."

"Azriel," he mumbles, looking straight ahead at the cars passing by. He didn't know how to feel. He didn't want to get sober. But he needed Bee. He couldn't lose her, after getting a taste? He couldn't handle not having her again. He swallowed the lump in his throat.

"You need a sponsor?" he asks, raising an eyebrow, Azriel shrugs, the new sobriety coin felt like it was burning a hole in his pocket. The anxiousness... The insatiable desire to rid himself of any of his uncomfortable feelings by doing a line and buying a bottle... How the hell was he supposed to stay sane?

"You going to be my sponsor?"

"First things first, don't wear a cocaine vile around your neck to an AA meeting."

-

I was quiet, careful when I slowly pushed open the door to Azriels apartment, my apartment too, I guess. Not for long.

It didn't feel like home anymore— the sickening feeling that twisted in my gut as I took a step inside. It was quiet, he wasn't home... Fucking filthy. There was pizza boxes and take out containers, ash everywhere, multiple ash trays made from various things, there were unfinished cigs and blunts everywhere that made it smell awfully of cigarettes and stale weed. Cocaine residue and half crushed pills were out on the coffee table like it was normal. I swallowed thickly, a soft breath leaving my lips I knew I shouldn't feel guilty, shouldn't feel bad that he obviously wasn't okay... But I did, I just left him. Never, never had I ever done that to Azriel. I was the one constant in his life, the one person who was always there. Ever since that day in front of my house all those years ago.

Titties, bottle girls, moving to Vegas. I reminded myself, my stomach turned again. So angry. Fucking idiot.

I entered the kitchen for a glass of water, needing something to calm that sick feeling. The bile that rose in my throat that felt like I was about to hurl everything I ate for the past three days. I thought better of it quickly, before I consumed anything from this rancid kitchen I would need to deep clean and disinfect.

Dirty dishes in the sink, the dishwasher hanging open half loaded still with clean dishes like he had just been taking them from there and hadn't bothered to put anything away, empty liquor bottles overflowing from the small recycling bin, more take out containers, a bong tipped over, the foul smelling water from it still dripping off of the counter, a small puddle of brownish water collected on the white tile.

What the fuck?

My room was the only room that didnt smell like bong water and cigarettes, but still, he had been in here. Maybe even slept in here. Papers covered the floor, not just papers but drawings. There were drawings of me everywhere. Just me, me naked, him and I together, kissing, fucking, our hands intertwined— there were even drawings of us when we were younger. A little messy, like he had been pressing down so hard— drawing with such emotion that he kept breaking his utensil of choice that day.

I let out a soft sob, my hand flying to cover my mouth.

Fuck.

Kat. I needed Kat.

I tried to swallow the growing lump in my throat again and pulled my phone out to check her location. Of course she was at the shop.

-

"Hey," the bells chime softly as I walk into the shop, there was no one in the waiting room besides Kat and she looked up from her phone, our eyes locking.

"Heyyy baby," she greets, flashing me a smile that soon turns into a frown, her eyebrows drawing together. "Are you good?"

"No," I loosed a shaky breath, advancing to the counter, I leaned against it like I had so many times, but my chest was fucking aching. It was so fucking infuriating that nothing felt the same, nowhere felt the same. I guessed this was what heart break really felt like, seeing the world in every color one day and then black and white the next. "Is he here?" I dropped my voice lower, playing with one of the knick knacks on the desk to distract myself.

"No, he left a while ago, didnt say where he was going," she's still frowning, the worried look still plastered on her face.

"The house Kat?" I paused, making a face. "It's fucking disgusting, I don't understand how hes living like that," my harsh words could have only been brought on by anger, she softens, her look turning more sympathetic which annoys me only, I ignore it.

"He hasn't been the best at work either— snapping on everyone, late every day and fucked up," she lets out a small sigh, "Rhys is fucking pissed," she pulls her lip between her teeth.

"Fuck Rhys, honestly," I mutter quietly, she raises an eyebrow in response but I only ignore it. Of course, none of this was his fault, but still Vegas. Why fucking Vegas? "It's my turn to get fucked up, anyway, that's why I'm here I bought a bottle to pregame, just needed my bitch and one of her miniskirts," my words are met with a grin.

"Babes you know I got you."

-

I hadn't been drunk in a while, so to say the least I was enjoying myself. The pounding of the music, talking to strangers, dancing with Kat. I had needed all of this.

To slip out of my mind for a few hours and just let go.

Kat was definitely enjoying herself now too, and was dancing with some tall sexy man she had just met. I was keeping to myself for the most part, on the edge of the dance floor, swaying my hips to the music as I surveyed the scene with a fuzzy mind.

My mouth popped open in slight surprise and when I felt curiosity instead of the desire to leave immediately, I knew I had drank too much. There was Eris, in all his jewelry and expensive clothes, looking poised and composed as always. Long pale ringed fingers wrapped around a glass of amber liquid. I hadn't seen him since the night we shared.

"You ghosted me princess."

"I had other things going on— and I didnt finish," I smile boredly, not meeting his gaze, it must have been the liquor making me so bold, he scoffs slightly his eyebrows raising in surprise.

"Let me buy you a drink then, to make up for it, must have been an off day for me," he inquires, I wouldn't give him the satisfaction that my body was basically broken with anyone except for Azriel, I would let him believe it was his fault. His ego could be taken down a peg, anyway.

"I have one already," I raise it up slightly, smirking as I swirl the liquid around in the cup.

"Not anymore," in a swift motion he takes the glass from my hand and dumps the drink in a near by plant, a fake plant. I squeaked, looking around to see if anyone else had witnessed it.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? It's fake and you just filled it with liquor and juice! Have you even heard of a fruit fly?" I demanded, swaying a bit on my feet, liquor buzzing through my veins. If anyone did that at my bar, I scoffed slightly at the thought staring him down judgmentally for his utter carelessness.

"It's fake, so the liquor won't kill it," he flashed me his insufferable sexy grin before adding "there's wins and losses to every decision we make," his eyes flashed and I stopped for a moment, weighing those words.

No, I can't get caught up in this. I had to figure out what was going on with Azriel and I. "And now you don't have a drink and I get to buy you one, so I win, Im not really concerned nor do I care about any of the losses. Besides, I only ever come here looking for you, so I don't care if they get fruit flies." That cocky smirk he wore, the way he carried himself... He did look good. That piercing gaze, the confidence that radiated off of him along with his expensive dizzying cologne.

I remembered what Az had said about him 'theres a lot of people that would kill him in this city' hearing his words echo in my head, knowing how much he hated that I'd been with Eris... I swallowed, my cheeks turning pink.

Az didnt care when he was fucked up, when he was smushing his face between those two bottle girls titties he didnt think about me at home— waiting for him.

So I wouldn't care now.

I didnt think about him, I didnt think about what it would do to him when I wrapped my fingers up into Eris expensive shirt and yanked his tall frame down to me.

"Wins and losses you say?" I whisper before pressing a kiss to his lips.

-

a/n: cliffhangerrr only time and comments will tell if yalll are mad about this drama HAHA sorry I had to drag the groveling out into multiple parts Az WILL be on his KNEES in the near future

taglist <3: @smalljasper289 @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @scorpioriesling @userxs-blog @lilah-asteria @abadfantasybook @judeduartewannbe @lindsayscottagebythesea @velarisdusk @serxndipity-ipity-blog @julesvanslutta @honk4emoboyz @bookishbishhh @dakotali @blessthepizzaman @scooobies

IF ANYONES TAG DIDNT WORK IM SO SORRY

[cntloup]

had enough

Toxic!Simon, unhinged reader, threatening to commit suicide, guns, mention of killing, implied cheating

Part 1 | Part 2

ik ive used this song before but whatever

“I’ll do it, Simon! I will fucking do it!” you shout while holding his gun to your head, the one he always kept under his pillow just in case. It was supposed to be there for your protection. But how he regrets it now. 

You're a complete wreck right now as you stand before him, uncontrollable flows of tears along with your makeup cascading down your face, bloodshot eyes looking back at him as you threaten to pull the trigger. 

And he has never been this scared in his life. Not even when streams of bullets come flying in his direction almost every day. 

“Put the gun down... please... we can talk about it. I will stay. I promise.” he pleads desperately, struggling to figure out what to do in this situation. 

“What does she have that I don’t have? Huh? What do they have? I don’t even fucking know how many there are anymore!” you continue yelling and sobbing while waving the gun around, stopping him dead in his tracks as he steps closer to take the gun from you. 

He ducks his head as you point the gun in his direction for a moment, “What? You think I'm gonna kill you? Whatever I do, I'll do it to myself! I can’t go on like this anymore!” you cry out, your loud sobs and hiccups fill the room, fill his senses, overwhelming him as it builds up his aggression and frustration more and more. 

“Put. The. Fuckin'. Gun. Down.” he states firmly as he gets closer, slowly reaching for the gun that you now hold by your side as you go on sobbing. 

“Why don’t you love me, Simon?” you ask while slightly tilting your head, this time in a much softer tone, almost as if you have given up the fight, now only desperate for an answer. 

Your words bring a shocked look to his face, not from the question itself, no, your question is completely valid considering his actions, but because he doesn’t know how to answer. 

He finally reaches out and takes the gun from you, your fingers loosening their grip and your sobs slowly dying down a bit, a defeated look replacing it, “Why do you do this to me? All of it? Why the fuck did you make me fall in love with you?” 

He holds his head down, not daring to meet your gaze and look into your expecting eyes as you still await an answer. 

Is it from shame? Or that he doesn’t want to confront the consequences of his actions? You don’t know which one, but you guess the latter is probably true. 

“You d-don't... can you just hold me please?” you ask in utter desperation as you shut your eyes in shame of admitting defeat.

In no time, you feel a pair of strong arms wrap you in a warm embrace. 

And after all that he’s done to you, you still feel safe in his arms, even somehow... loved? Or something resembling that.

And you remember why you always keep crawling back to him as he tightens his arms around you.

And as much as you don't like to admit to yourself, you'd feel content if he would just pretend to love you.

yes im going through some stuff as you can tell :'(

[sonoyoung]

- Soon

bsf!non idol!dokyeom x gn!reader | fluff + friend to lovers | 0.5k | wait - dino “I'll hold you close and tell you not to question us, don't worry”

a/n. erm idk about this one, i thought writing dk would be easy coz love him but im just overthinking haha, i hope you like it i have longer stuff coming, these are just fillers i wanna post :,)

Most days you could feel his gaze, he didn’t always make it obvious, but you knew he was looking, it was needy, begging for some sort of answer from you, an answer you had a hard time formulating. In your head it was clear, the day Seokmin blurted out his feelings under the influence of alcohol, you found it funny that he would admit to it when he knew you were seeing someone at the time, not that it was going well, but the timing really made you smile.

It was those sorts of things that you liked about him, he knew how to brighten up even the brightest days talk less of the dark ones, if he knew a situation was bringing you down, he would try his best to make it better for you. For the longest time you wondered why he did that, why he went out of his way just for you and now you knew, and you would be lying if you said you didn’t feel the same.

However, there was still the timing, you had been in an on and off relationship for the past few months and the only thing it brought you was exhaustion, you didn’t even know why you held on to it, but you did and now you didn’t know how to end it completely, so you put Seokmin on hold, hoping he’d understand.

It was an odd situation being in love with your best friend but dating someone who only gave you the comfort of not having to be single and goodnight kisses. You actually hated having to make Seokmin wait because of something so insignificant but the decision was harder to make that just the shitty boyfriend factor.

Seokmin was everything to you, once you’d leave your boyfriend, he’d be all you had left, your past relationships never truly worked out, but it was never that bad because he was there for you so if it didn’t work out this time you would be so lost.

When you would see each other, you would act like nothing changed but his eyes always searched yours for a flicker of hope, he didn’t want to pressure you into it just because you both reciprocated feelings but he didn’t want you to base your decision off an unrealistic fear.

“You know I’ll be fine if you say no, it was kind of selfish of me to put you in such a position” he gives you a small smile shrugging along with the words, you shake your head at him completely dismissing the statement,

“You were drunk and I haven’t decided yet, it’s hard… I don’t want to lose you” his eyes widen hearing those words like losing you is something he couldn’t even fathom, he cups your cheeks in his hands, so you look at him directly in the eyes.

“I’m not going anywhere baby,” you can’t help the smile that creeps up on your face, “I know you’re scared but trust me I won’t be letting go”

“Really? Never?” he smiles so bright his eyes are smiling too, it makes you so warm inside.

“I’ve loved you so long I don’t think it’s ever dying out”

ty for reading feedback is much appreciated

[sgnjimmy]

Hey can you do something about Owen Knight and the Black Reader to help Owen Reader study for a math test and be fluff thank you

𝓞𝔀𝓮𝓷 𝓚𝓷𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽 𝔁 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻

≛ 𝙰/𝚗: so sorry for taking so much time with your request ((one year of delay is crazy, im terrible sorry)). I had so much fun starting this but then I just got stuck, so my bad. If you have any complaints or if you want something fixed let me know, I'll see what I can do. also, he might be a bit OOC, but that's bc he's mesmerized 😍.

≛ 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝: 999.

Owen has his eyes fixated on you as you're explaining the same math problem for the third time today. You probably would be mad at him if you knew he's paying more attention to your pretty lips, rather than your lovely voice. But the blonde couldn't care less about school stuff when you were sat, prettily, right beside him — at an arm 's length of distance. He's so glad you agreed to help him with this, and even more so for coming to his house to do it.

He should feel guilty, and if he stopped to think about the whole situation for a minute, he is.

The truth was that Owen didn't really have any problems with math, you see. He just saw an opportunity to get close to you and the boy took it without blinking an eye. At the end it was all worth it, he can finally admire you up close, and…

God, what a sight, Owen thinks smiling.

Your skin looks so soft, he wishes to touch it but, of course, he refrains himself. He doesn't want to scare you off when he just now got you alone in a room with him.

Owen entertains himself by smelling the perfume you have on. He wonders which brand it is and where he can get it… Maybe he can sneak a question about it later.

Owen’s so lost that he's daydreaming about buying clothes like yours and spraying your perfume on it so he can pretend it's you.

Your voice brings him back to reality.

“Hey, hey. Owen?” You wave your hand in front of him. “You there?”.

“Sorry, so sorry. What were you saying, pretty?”

There. Pretty. Owen always drops pet names when talking to you, and it sounds so effortless that it has your heart skipping a beat. You only hope Owen doesn't notice the way you quickly pursed your lips in response.

“Mm, I know it's a lot. We can take a break if you want.”

A break? Great! Owen thinks. Now he'll have the chance to actually talk with you instead of just staring.

After making up his mind Owen gets up from his chair.

“Yeah, sure. Do you want anything? A drink? Snack?” The blond asks you with a smile.

The kind of smile that had you daydreaming of him. The kind of smile made you say fold when Owen came up to you between classes to congratulate you about your latest score. All the teachers were talking about it, and one even mentioned it in Owen's clase. Since you two weren't in the same class it was hard for Owen to talk freely with you but he still didn't want to give up.

So when he heard the news it was like a sign from heaven, telling him to ask you to tutor him since you were such a good student.

“I'm good. Don't wor–”

“No, it's fine. Just ask away.”

You don't reply right away. Still contemplating what you should do. After a couple of breaths you figure that Owen is trying to be a good host. You should just accept his kind offer, after all maybe when he sees you're taken care of he'll concentrate on the actual task in hand, math.

So you give in, and tell yourself it got nothing to do with his pretty smile.

“Just a sandwich will do, thanks.”

“Great” Owen starts to turn to leave but when he sees you're copying him, the blond stops in his tracks. “No, no. Wait here, I'll be back in a second.”

Owen is not back in a second. Instead it looks like he's taking his sweet time making that sandwich.

You began to question if you should go down the stairs and check what's going on but before you can get up from your chair, Owen walks through his bedroom door. You notice he holds a wooden tray with two plates, cups and a jar of juice.

As you watch him approach you make room on his study table.

"Here." He says, placing a plate in front of you.

You guys fall into a comfortable silence while eating. After the food is gone, Owen decides to make a move, asking you things to get to know more of you. It starts with what lotion you use, he compliments it's smell and told you it suited you.

As the minutes went off, you got more comfortable chatting with him about anything and also answering the questions he threw now and then. The sun was already setting and you two didn’t even notice.

A ring from your phone interrupted you as you spoke in reply to Owen's latest question.

“It's my parents.” You explain as you read the messages on your phone. “Shit, it's 9 already… Sorry, but I should get going.”

You get up from your chair to gather your things from the table.

“No, i'm sorry. I didn't mean to keep you here so late. I didn't even notice it got so late.” Owen hands you the books you brought, helping you pack your things.

“Don't stress about it. Is just that my parents are worried about me walking home late.”

“I'll walk you.”

You make a noise from surprise.

“What? It's fine, you–”

“I can walk you.” Owen opens the door of his room and makes a gesture for you to go first. “It's only fair, since it's my fault that you're here at this hour.”

“You don't need to trouble yourself, I'll–”

“I insist.” Owen simply says, but what gets you it's that on his face lays that damn smile. “Please, angel.” He adds, and you give in for the second time today.

You just might do so for the rest of your life if he keeps this up.

Owen isn't aware of it but since he met you he's been playing dirty. Those heavenly blue eyes and soft smile. The pet names and light touches. He had you since day one.

But he didn't need to know that…

© 𝙨𝙧𝙜𝙣𝙟𝙞𝙢𝙢𝙮 2024

[starker-raving-mads]

For You: Part IX

im so sorry this took so long but everyone can thank @madeforstarker for kicking me in the ass to get it done. Thank you, princess <3

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX

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Peter didn't see Tony for three days.

This was partially his fault. His initial reaction to The Bedroom Incident, as he was calling it, was to flee the entire building, his feet scurrying him to May's apartment early the following morning. He spent a good few hours with his aunt - something he didn't actually regret, though the reason for the new time together soured it a little for him - and when she left for work he left for patrol. It was probably his longest patrol yet, capping off at 6 hours, and while it felt good to stretch his muscles and help the people of Queens, his mind constantly drifted back to The Bedroom Incident.

He couldn't face Tony after that.

And yet he couldn't not.

After weeks of living in the penthouse, it felt like home. It was the only place he felt well and truly free and comfortable, and Tony being there just made it even better. Even with the - awkwardness that now surrounded them, surely they could get over that right? It's not like he'd said Tony's name. Out loud, at least.

So, exhausted and starving, he swung by a 24/7 deli and grabbed two sandwiches. They wouldn't be as good as Mr. Delmar's but Peter was starving so he'd take what he could get. He ate one of them on the walk home in his street wear, taking his time by taking a circuitous route back to Stark Tower. It was just delaying the inevitable but Peter couldn't bring himself to speed up the awkward conversation he was no doubt gonna have once he got home.

And yet, once the elevator doors opened and revealed the penthouse, no one was there.

"Fri?" he called.

"Yes, mom?"

"Where's, uh - where's Tony at?"

"Boss has been dematerialized and operating within the bounds of his cognitive digital space, which I am unable to access. Would you like me to get him for you?" she asked, tone colored with curiosity. Peter had to wonder what she thought of the situation, but also did not want to know. He could only imagine the leaps in logic she would make that would hit too close to home.

He dawdled around the living room for a little while before heading down to the labs, half expecting Tony to be there, blue and glowing and insubstantial but present and, for lack of better words, alive.

This was not the case.

Tony was nowhere in the confines of the lab. Peter sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, slowly making his way toward the elevator. He stopped before he entered it and turned around, speaking aloud, "I, uh, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I - yeah. I'll be around." He felt like an idiot speaking to an empty room but he wasn't sure what else to do.

He spent the rest of the night in the penthouse doing his online course work in silence. When he went to bed, he had Friday tell Tony just in case he wanted to know where Peter was, and then fell into a very tense and restless sleep.

The following two days were much like the first. Peter woke up, had Friday tell Tony what he was doing or where he was, visited his friends or May, patrolled, and did his online coursework. He'd come home, have Friday update Tony - not that she ever got an affirmative response - and he went to bed. He slept like shit, he felt like shit, and it was really starting to drain him.

On the fourth day, when he'd about lost his patience and his nerve, Tony finally popped into existence in the middle of the living room. It scared the hell out of him but he didn't do much more than look at the older man, dumbfounded and slightly stupefied.

"Tony?"

"Yeah, uh," the simulation ran a hand through his hair, messing it up in an impossibly cute way, "hi."

"Hi," Peter replied, lame as fuck.

They stared at each other in silence, brown eyes meeting blue ones, before Tony finally broke the tension.

"I'msorryforintrudingandseeingyoucum."

It was only Peter's enhanced senses that made the jumble of words make sense and he blushed immediately, grimacing and trying to hide it.

"It - uh, it's okay."

"It's really not, this is your place and I should give you privacy and I didn't and - " Tony paused, looking at Peter again. " - and I really should not know you have a daddy kink, kid."

"Oh god," Peter groaned, grabbing a pillow and shoving it over his face. "You heard that?"

Tony chuckled and it somehow broke the tension in the room despite the topic. "Kinda hard not to when you're all breathy and moaning. Plus," he shrugged, still grinning, "I have this kickass new memory since it all gets stored and fragmented and saved now."

"Please, please let's change topics before I pass out from blood loss," Peter begged. And, suddenly, everything felt right with the world again. This was their thing. Teasing and being teased, having fun and making jokes between all the serious stuff. It felt good, like a breath of fresh air after three very long, very lonely days.

Peter tried not to analyze what that meant for the future of his sex life.

Long and lonely, he sighed.

But, they moved topics like Peter had wanted, only to something he had not really expected.

"You what?" he asked, perplexed.

"I sent Pepper a Cease & Desist," Tony said as if it made any sense at all.

"How? Did you tell her you were - "

"Oh no, no way," the older man shook his head. "I figured neither of us were ready to pop open that can of worms. I sent it through Friday on your behalf - which," he grimaced, "I probably should've asked first, but what's done is done."

"It's fine, I guess, just - why?" That was what Peter couldn't understand. Why would Tony be sending C&Ds to his wife of all people? And on Peter's behalf no less.

"Listen, kid, I fucked up when I made my will - and before you start thinking it was about your part, it wasn't that," he cut Peter off when he saw the protest in his eyes. With a firm glare, he continued, "She had no right doing a lot of the things she did and is still doing. I had plenty of time in the last three days to think about it, analyze data, check on sources - it's amazing what having all that extra time I'd normally be sleeping can do - and I'm very unhappy with her, Pete."

"Just, why?" Peter asked again, feeling like a parrot or an NPC who had no other dialogue.

"She shouldn't have taken your blanket," the older man glared. "And she shouldn't have said what she did in that meeting room, or any of the tactics she's employed since. I know Pepper, kid, like I know the back of my hand," he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose with one hand. "That means all the good and the bad. I know that I loved her, or something like that - I must have, to have gotten married and had a kid and everything," he waved his hand like this was not a tremendous thing to be admitting. Might have loved his wife. Oh boy. "But she's taking my decisions out on you and it's not right and it's not fair."

"I don't - "

"If you say you don't mind, kid, I'm gonna figure out a way to kick your ass," Tony swore. "You matter, your persona matters to the public and the shareholders, your favorite things matter even when they're just blankets, and you matter enough to me to be able to see your own god daughter."

"I - thank you," Peter replied softly, curling into the couch with a not-as-cozy blanket draped over him. "I don't know what to say to that."

"Just accept it."

Peter chuckled. "I can do that."

A sweet smile was spread across the space between them, warm and something. After a moment, Peter asked, "So what exactly did your C&D say?"

"The majority of it was just getting her to stop her public and private attacks on you," Tony started. He sat on one of the couch cushions and it was weird seeing it not sink in with his weight. "There was a second petition as well, to get visiting hours with Morgan. I hope, uh," he looked truly nervous here. "I hope you don't mind. I really think you'll love her, Pete." His eyes were earnest as he said this, not really looking for acceptance to an apology that wasn't given. Tony wanted Peter to know his daughter and Peter wanted that too.

"Of course I will," Peter smiled. "She's part you, remember?"

[the-moon-devi]

MESSAGES FROM THE LUMINARIES & PLUTO

Look at the pictures, Close your eyes & take a couple deep breaths. Open your eyes and choose. If you can't choose a pile this may not be the reading for you!

Attention ❗ ( this reading will not be for everybody!)

Hey ya'll! I wanted to make a Tarot reading channeling the planets. Originally This was supposed to be just Neptune.... but spirit said not right now. So instead they told me to do the luminaries & pluto. Idk why these specifically. Pluto did just move into aqaurius so i understand pluto but the sun & the moon are probably the divine feminine & masculines. Depending on which pile you pick will tell a lot about the energy you are. But it's alot with karmic issues & divine unions. I'm also picking up on venus energy as well. Ik venus is finishing up her flower. So maybe I'll just do a channeling venus next for the Twins/ soulmates out there. It won't be a pac just a collective read. I want those of you who are in these type of dynamics to understand your purpose & what it means when you come across certain omens etc. I'm sure your spirit team as well will help you to understand. I just feel called to speak on it. Alright enough of my rambling! As always enjoy! (444 as I was typing this)

• ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊° .☆ . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊° .☆. • ☆ . ° • ☆ . ° .•°*₊° .☆ .

Pile 1:

Tarot: 3 of swords, 7 of cups, 2 of wands, 6 of pentacles, The Empress & The Emperor

Runes: Ehwaz- horse, transportation, partnership; Nauthiz- Need, necessity, hardship; Tiwaz-honor, justice, leadership, authority

Extra Messages: virgin,fated,water,dancing/music

Oracle: jump in, karmic relationships, surrender to the sweetness

Moonology- full moon in cancer, New moon in aqaurius, full moon in aqaurius

Messages from the moon:

If you chose this pile you are heavily connected to Lunar & water life energy. The moon is saying something about relationships. You have went through a break up that left you feeling confused. You may have had bad luck in love & receiving dreams about this. With the 2 of wands & 6 of pentacles I'm really getting that you're going to come together with a person. You guys may explore the world together and give charity or just really help people. So I pull my cards/runes as I'm writing. If you look above you'll see the runes you got and they match up perfectly with what I just said. You & this person may travel. You both may be very powerful & earlier I wanted to say you gave me power couple vibes. But there may be some type of misunderstanding that's going on here and the moon may be sending you dreams to understand this. But there's like a need for your two to be together. This is karmic and Fated. You may be new to relationships and things like that. Moon wants you to open up. You may be a dancer as well ik that's random but your energy kept pulling song cards. You and this person may have not had s*x yet and your scared of that but again moon is helping you to open up. You may have really gotten hurt before or your scared of this person hurting you again. You should connect with water as well. You may have moon-venus,moon-Uranus, or moon in aquarius, cancer, taurus/libra. Yall may be traveling out the country soon as well because I just heard, "visa". I can't get over this 3 of swords & 7 of cups energy so I'm gonna pull some more...... ok so I pulled the world card & the 3 of wands wanted to come out. I getting maybe your scared/paranoid to travel. Maybe it's with the person. I think you might have social anxiety and the moon wants you to show the real you. Whatever issues you have will come to a close. The moon wants you to bring love onto your situation & freely show yourself. Be vulnerable. You could also be afraid of large bodies of water. I'm also getting that your beautiful. (I mean you did pull the empress so ofc) your uniqueness is pulled to the front. I feel like yall have like Lunar and Uranian energy heavily in your chart maybe even venusian. It's kinda crazy because Im not getting much on your person they may be moving really slow towards you. They could even be long distance or live overseas and your scared to take a leap of faith to go see them. I'm really getting your protected tho. Yeah there's definitely some type of wedge that's driving yall apart but your going to come together. It's really something with travel but this issue will be fixed. There may even be a certain lesson you have to learn about letting go & be OK with change. Don't stay stuck in one spot because your scared. Alright bye pile 1!

Pile 2:

Runes: Mannaz- Mankind,Divine structures, mind, learning,memory; Peorth- unknowable, luck, chance, fate, divine intervention, ancestry memories, feminine, destiny; Ansuz- ancestors, ancestral knowledge, God/gods, communication, omens; Thurisaz- regeneration, chaos & power, protection, violence

Tarot: Knight of Wands, 8 of wands, 2 of cups, Queen of Pentacles, The lovers, The judgement card

Oracle: Star Family- you're apart of a team of souls call in support; Portal- doors are opening. you decide. Rewards. Wild card; The Great Severing- mars energy, anger, conflict, softening to love

Moonology- full moon in libra New moon in aqaurius

Extra messages: Past Lives, My Soul Evolves, Countertop,Yin-yang

Hey to my plutonian pile!!

If you chose this pile 222 & 88 could be important numbers to you. So before I even pulled anything I started singing London Bridge by Twenty88. Maybe if you fell off it would be really bad for someone/ something. Maybe pluto is really taking you through a destruction moment. Perhaps something is coming to an end? Let's pull to see!

Ok so basically from these cards I'm getting that your ancestors could have built some type of mystery school. There are definitely assisting you in your path. It's funny we are talking about past life's because plutonian energy does rule over death. And old memories. So maybe you remember your past life. Your waking up to what you used to be to help you in the present. They always say "know where you come from so you can know where you are going". There is definitely love invovled. You and your person text or talk alot. Definitely a divine union because we have two of cups, the lovers and the judgement card. The judgement card to me in this scenario is saying that you both are waking up to remember something. You could be getting alot of messages from source. A lot of the runes are saying the same thing. This is something that is Fated and has to happen. You are protected by pluto and if anybody messes with you they gone kick they a$$. I really just heard that. You may teach mankind some type of ancient knowledge. Maybe you were a queen in your past life as well. So yeah I just pulled two extras and we have the empress and death. And with that London Bridge song the catch phrase,' the London Bridge is fallen" means the queen has fallen. So maybe you were killed in a past life by someone. You were definitely a queen and I feel like you feel this energy in the present. You have very strong energy. Maybe someone was jealous of you and your partner.

Wow yall I didn't even need to pull oracle because it's just confirmation. You have support when it comes to your spirit team and ancestors. They are opening doors for you on the other side. All you have to do is tell them and they're willing to ride and do it. The last Oracle card you pulled was mars energy and that's funny because scorpio is originally ruled by mars. But again with this jealousy and violent energy. Someone definitely was jealous of you in your past life. As for your person they may have been a little bit of a hot head. You were the queen of pentacles & the empress so you were very powerful . You had a lot of earth energy & connected to Gaia.

Something in summer could happen for you. This summer you may go through a transformation. But pluto is evolving you into a even stronger energy. If you don't remember certain past life memories you will start to get them back. You & this person are divine counterparts. I really feel like you & this person have already met in this lifetime so this is confirmation if you feel like you know them. They were like the other half to you literally. Yall may be building a house or something like that as well. Or your going back to a house from your ancestral lineage and seeing the countertop and you like it. Ik thats specific but thats only for a few of you! Also your ancestors or your family now may have a stone/rock business maybe they were into architecture. You guys may be being spied on as well. Thank you for reading pile 2! I hope this resonated for you!

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Pile 3:

Tarot: The Emperor, ace of swords, the empress,9 of cups, knight of cups,3 of swords, knight of wands, the tower

Oracle: Double mission- lightworker & starseex ; Deep cellular healing, The seas of mintaka- seeing potential bringing unconsciousness to light.

Moonology- full moon in cancer, full moon in saggitarius, New moon in cancer

Extra messages: sweet, hit different, angel for them but for me you a hoe

Runes: Berkana- mother earth, birth, fertility, growth; Fehu- wealth, property, new begginnings, luck; Jera- harvest, year, patience, harmony, abundant

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Heyyy pile 3! Ya'll are my solar pile! So before I pulled your cards I was hearing at your best you are love by Aaliyah. You are like sunlight for somebody. I just heard, "thank you" so maybe you really help people out. You really are the sun. The sun is giving you the light to light the world & spread love. Let's pull some cards now....

Now I'm hearing Ja Ara É by Burna Boy. This song really just sounds happy to me. But go give that a listen.

Ok so yall literally got almost the same cards as pile. I shuffled these card atleast twice before I even getting to this pile. So ik it's not me. Even the same Oracle wanted to come out and for the moon cards there was one card that is the same as pile 1. So yall are traveling somewhere. I'm getting like maybe moving somewhere far away. With the emperor I'm getting maybe this is a masculine energy watching this pile. Idk but if your a masculine and you have a DF her energy was in pile 1 and for some reason I really couldn't get much on you the masculine energy. So maybe this is the other half of pile 1! You may be wanting to talk to a feminine enrgy. Maybe you said some hurtful things and you want to make her feel better. Or maybe there is this mental understanding between the two of you to try something new and heal together. I'm seeing that this will be beneficial and make the both of you happy. You could be sending the feminine energy words of love & healing. Yall literally may be traveling to see one another. I'm getting one of yall are fast and the other one is slow. The 3 of swords and the tower tells me that there was some type of break up that happened abruptly. I think you are now coming back together and building. There's a new begginning between the two of you and there's a lot of abundance surrounding this connection. I get the feeling that the emperor is the empress sun like the emperor lights up her being but when the emperor is mean the empress isn't happy. You may have broken up to find yourself and not be so attached. I keep getting water energy so maybe yall are very connected to water. The empress is very sweet. The empress may actually be pregnant the more I look at these cards. Alrighty pile 3! I really didn't get much but I think this was just a wrap up of pile 1 from a different perspective. I hope this resonated!

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Catch ya later lovelies! Til' next time!

~𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓶𝓮𝓵 𝓴𝓲𝓼𝓼𝓮𝓼 xx🤎💋

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𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒄𝒌 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒐𝒖𝒕!

𝓓𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓷𝓮 𝓓𝓮'𝓛𝓾𝔁𝔁𝓮 (masterlist)

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©𝓟𝓻𝓮𝓽𝓽𝔂 𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓶𝓮𝓵

[youremyheaven]

buut one more thing, Jupiter women trying to be the dad they never had is so true, I've definitely noticed that. My MIL is Vishakha Moon & she's kinda like, the man of the house. She had a very abusive upbringing with super incompetent parents & she ended up having to take a lot of responsibility for her siblings even as a child.

Of course she ended up with a partner who is- lowkey incompetent. He has some good qualities and he does work and all that, but he is a menacee. He expects her to do eeeverything and acts like a big man baby- he gets mad at her if she doesn't untie his shoes for him when he gets home from work. She gets up every morning at 2am with him without fail, gets his lunch ready, makes him breakfast before he goes to work. She makes him coffee and tea at his whim. He will go to the bathroom to have a shower, not bring his towel, then yell her name out incessantly until she comes and gets it for him.

Tmi but he also has no uh, aim in the bathroom- it's really gross, like, really really gross. I had a word with MIL about it, and I was kinda just like 'yeah I'm sure he doesn't mean to do it but maybe you should have a word with him' and she looked scared and kept trying to change the subject and kinda just went 'I'll make sure I clean it up after he goes in'. Like bro is scared to tell her man child ass husband to clean up after himself 😭 poor girl.. I mean I think she's content with how things are because she grew up with so much worse, so in her mind he's the best, but I did read that Vishakha Moon women in particular can absolutely worship their husbands.

She is veryyy generous but to the point that it's a bit overbearing and I feel bad but like, I live with them all currently and I'm very grateful but sometimes she's doing too much. Like she will come home with a bunch of treats and knick knacks and I'm like- thankyou but where do I even put this?? I have no space because of all of the other things you already gave me 😭💟

Also @makingspiritualityreal made a really good post on here about how in Vishakha, the feminine is debilitated so she finds herself constantly in her masculine and never able to simply rest and be the receiver.

It definitely makes sense that this situation created two children with Venusian Moons.

your MIL's relationship triggered me so much, i've grown up seeing my mom be that way and its always disgusted me 🤮🤮🤮🤢and made me mad 😡😠😠

Vishaka women worshipping their partners is so true. Look at Beyonce, Vishaka Moon and how she seems to blindly love that crusty ass cheating man 🤮🤮

I also think it applies to Vishaka men because Will Smith, Vishaka Moon is also like that with Jada, even though she's literally an energy vampire

Generous to the point of being overbearing is soooo true about Jupiter women,, they be doing TOO much and it lowkey makes you feel guilty because you know that you could never be as giving or endure what they have and still come out without any resentment or bitterness

My friend's mom is Vishaka Moon (and her dad is Bharani Moon but idk his other placements but he seems like a Solar guy tbh) and her parents have a similarly toxic marriage. Her mom packs lunch AND puts it in his car??? before he leaves for work??? she also makes separate meals for her, her dad, her sister, their dog etc :// and everytime she spoke of her mom, it felt like her whole existence revolved around just serving everyone and it always made me sick to my stomach

I'll try to find that post you mentioned <333 tysm for letting me know <33

SKSJDJJDJDK "this situation created 2 children with Venus moons" IS SO REAL IM SHAKINGGG

ive mentioned him before but my Purvaphalguni Moon friend from college was a stereotypical Venusian man (he also had many Swati placements 🥰) and his dad was an alcoholic/generally incompetent guy who never did anything and quit working??? a long time ago??? (his elder brother provided for the family) and I remember how he often went grocery shopping or ran errands in the afternoon and sometimes rushed to go home bc his mom was waiting for him 😭😭🥺everytime he spoke to his mom on the phone, he became the softest guy ever and it made me feel so 🥺🥺🥺

unlike Lunar men who are complete mama's boys (prime example, Ranbir Kapoor, Shravana Moon),, Venusian men are more mama's little helper type dudes. The difference between Lunar and Venusian men (I'm mentioning these two specifically bc they're both Yin and benefic planets and known for being devoted to their mom) is that Lunar men kind of become extremely passive and dependent on their mom and Venusian men bend over backwards to provide for her and take care of her.

Two different reactions to having a loving mom

I once knew a Rohini Moon man who told me he hasn't been eating right for a few weeks because his mom had gone to stay with her family overseas 💀💀💀and I was like??? do you just not eat then??? and he was like "yeah I have no appetite without her feeding me" 💀💀💀and mind you he was 24 years old lmao and ik some of you will say "aww thats so cute" blah blah ITS NOT CUTE, a grown ass man starving himself (all he ate was bread apparently bc he didn't like eating out 💀💀) bc his mommy wont feed him IS INSANE EWWW. i ghosted him after that conversation lmfao bc i cannot stand that passive raja beta behaviour

In India, we have something called "raja beta syndrome" which is rooted in son preference (unfortunately sex selective abortions and female foeticide/infanticide is vvvv common in india) and most men grow up being treated like royalty (raja= king, beta = son). This is why Indian men are losers lmao because they've been spoonfed their whole lives by their moms/families and they expect their wives to also be doormats and serve them for the rest of their lives.

Lunar men give me raja beta vibes :///

I like my Venus men who grew up trying to make their moms lives easier and trying to give HER royal treatment because they want to be the one who treats her right<333 these are the only kind of mommy issues I'll accept <333 like oh you dont want me to run errands or pay the bills because your mom had to work so hard and it gives you trauma to think ill have to do that and make you feel like you've failed as a man?? dw king i gotchu <333 go get those errands done.🥰🤪😜

[graysnetwork]

HERMOSA

(I’m in severe need of more Luis fics, and I feel bad for spamming the same ppl but there’s no other ppl who write for him🫠)

Notes— I was planning on the reader speaking a bunch of Spanish throughout the story but I forgot until the end so hopefully it’s okay. AFAB reader. My tumblr also glitched so there might be misspelled things.

Summary— Luis is enjoying giving nicknames to Leon’s partner because she decided to keep her name a secret. But she’s enjoying it too.

Warnings— none, im pretty sure

You, Leon, and ashley ran into the house, breathing heavily because of the rush from running away from the ganados, Leon was mad at the man who had shouted at all of of you guys to come get inside of the building. "You" Leon said pushing the guys against the wall, "listen about earlier!" The man said, you could hear his accent in the sentence

"Yeah about that" Leon mocked him almost, "Ahh, I see you found your missing señorita, and got your partner back" the man said. Ashley walked in front of your "señorita has a name, Ashley" she told him, both you and Leon trusted her to keep herself safe but you didn't know if you could trust this man so you walked up to stand beside her.

"And you are?" You asked, "Luis Serra, encantado" he responded almost immediately "and your name hermosa?" He asked you "that's not important" you told him Leon hummed agreeing with you, Luis looked back at him remembering he was being held against a wall.

"What are you doing here?" Leon asked Luis, "very good questions, unfortunately" luis nodded off to bring all of your guys' attention to the ganados walking through the gate.

“I think we need to continue this conversation later,

I'll get your name later hermosa"

—

Ashley yelled from across the building "Guys! This way, hurry!" You turned to her before turning back and shooting a ganado. Even more started to raid the building so the three of you guys started running out of the house that you guys had been inside.

You guys finally got away from all the zombie, and Ashley began to cough you checked her hand as she looked at it scared, "Ashley, is this your first time coughing up blood like that?" Luis asked her, she nodded in response "you wanna explain something?" Leon asked Luis.

He explained that, what Ashley was experiencing was plagas. Luckily you guys had found out at an early stage so hopefully you could get rid of it from her body.

"So, that's plagas?" You asked, he hummed and nodded his head, you sighed and began to walk away from the group looking around wanting to distract yourself from that new found information.

"We won't let her turn into one of them, It'll be alright hermosa" Luis told you, he assumed you were worried about Ashley, which you were obviously, but you were also worried about yourself.

"Im not just worried about her, I think I have plagas" you said, "what?" Ashley asked, "| started coughing up blood and feeling terrible about two hours ago, I thought I was just disgusted by this whole. situation, but I guess not!" You said shrugging. "Don't worry mi carino, l'll take care of you, I won't let anything happen to you" Luis told you. You smiled at Luis' choice of nick name for you, it was cute and it was nice you were the only one who understood him

If Ashley even had a clue of these names he was giving you she would totally make fun of you, or ship you guys.

But you thought it wasn't anything more than flirting, you could tell that Luis was the flirty type and you didn't think it was anything more than that but knowing Ashley (after a little while) she'd totally ship you guys and tell you guys you were perfect for each other.

But you lightly nodded to him before he began talking again "luckily, we can remove these parasites from you guys when we get to my laboratory" he said, reassuring you that he would get the plagas removed from the two of you.

"Why are you helping us?" Leon asked him, "because it makes me feel better, let's leave it at that" he said plainly.

"how about you come with me hermosa?" Luis suggested, Leon looked at you, he didn't want you to go with him because he still did not trust him and what he was up to.

“Well keep each other safe" Luis said, "he must really want me to go with him„ you thought to yourself “alright then” you said, smiling at Leon trying to reassure him that you’d be fine. “Great, we’ll be in contact” Luis said and began walking away, waving his radio around to show Leon how they would be in contact.

—

“so why did you want me to come with you?” You asked Luis “because, you were infected first so you need to be taken care of first” Luis said looking around, “and” he added “I still haven’t gotten your name” he said smiling.

“You really wanna know huh” you said teasingly, “of course, a beautiful woman must have a beautiful name” he said, his words made your cheeks heat up.

“Hm, I don’t know if I should tell you” you told him, you two were standing in a forest, in the middle of nowhere, flirting with each other. You both knew this was not the right place or time to be doing this but it was fun, plus it gave you a distraction to all the chaos that was going on around you guys.

Although, ever since you separated from Leon, there wasn’t any danger around you and Luis, or at least less danger. Maybe danger and chaos followed Leon around.

“Im kind of enjoying these nicknames your giving me Luis” you told him, you were getting closer to him, and grabbed the zipper of his jacket and played around with it.

“You are?” He says, his voice barely above a whisper, he was getting more red by every second you two were getting closer.

“Mhmm” you hummed, and got on your tippy toes to get even closer face to face. “So I’ll keep it a secret for little longer” you said as you backed away, standing normally again, you patted his chest and continued on your way, walking on the trail you two were following. Luis just watched as you walked away from him, the way your hips swayed and the way you your black cargo pants somehow hugged your figure perfectly.

He scoffed and began following you, taking out his lighter to play with since it was boring. It was quiet, only the crunching of the leaves beneath your guy’s feet were heard, before you asked “so, is this “procedure” gonna hurt?” Luis was silent for a moment before answering “yes, but I’m sure you can handle it”

You smiled at the compliment, but then heard one of the villager’s voice shout “ahí están!” And were met with several others coming your guy’s way, you both turned to each other and you tilted you head meaning you were ready to go, Luis nodded and took the lead, and you followed.

—

You two finally got through the trail after killing the ganados, Luis groaned and you turned to see if he was hurt, he looked annoyed and disgusted “something happen?” You asked, and he looked back at you “they got my jacket dirty” Luis said, you chuckled “we can clean it later” you told him.

“Y’know, usually I would’ve said ladies first but, we can’t risk getting your pretty face getting dirty”

“Such I gentlemen”

—

You two had been walking for a few minutes, about 20 minutes if you had to guess, you had started to feel a bit light headed, you assumed it would go away and it was just a small side effect from the plaga.

But I didn’t go away, and your head was feeling worse every second, so you decided to stop and stand for a while, give yourself a rest.

Luis was still walking as you didn’t have enough energy to say something, he was only a few steps away from you before you said “Luis” weakly

And he turned to look at you, before you collapsed and passed out, he was able to catch you in time before you could hit the dirt. “Mierda, hold on I’ve got you” he said, and got a hold of you so he could carry you.

—

He finally got to his laboratory and opened the door, the squeak of the door opening was able to wake you up, “oh good your awake” he said, you still felt like shit, Luis placed you on the chair before tapping the screen next to it.

“Okay, this is the procedure, se va a sentir horrible” he told you, “mhm, nomas apúrate, I already feel like shit” you replied.

He nodded and pressed the button on the screen and the machine began to move and you finally felt it happen.

It was absolutely terrible just like Luis said but you tried to stay awake, but immediately passed out again.

—

Finally what felt like forever for Luis, you woke up, blinking a few times, but you didn’t feel bad anymore, “Te sientes bien mi amor?” He asked, you smiled at the name and nodded “feel like a million bucks” you joked.

Luis chuckled, and he pulled away from the hug, you sat up on the edge of the chair “so, it’s gone now?” You asked, “yes” he replied, face began to inch closer to yours, tilted at a perfect angle for him to lean in and kiss you right then and there.

You were getting impatient by now, so you grabbed his collar and pulled him into a kiss, it was perfect, his hands placed on your hips as you wrapped one of your arms round his neck and the other was placed gently on his chest.

He was so passionate about it and you didn’t want it to end, if you guys weren’t in the situation you were in right now, you would’ve stayed there forever, you didn’t want to let go of him, not now, not when you were barley getting to feel his lips on yours.

He pulled away slowly, for the both of you to get some air, you opened your eyes immediately when he started to move away from you, you watched as he opened his eyes slowly, he looked almost as if he was drunk, but also so handsome.

“Y/n” you told him, “Que?” He asked, “my name, since you wanted to know so bad” you said.

He smiled, “so I was right, una chica hermosa tiene un nombre hermosa” he said, and you smiled back at him before grabbing his collar again and pulling him into another deep and long kiss, one that you would not be pulling away from any time soon.

[bluemoonjayy]

ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴇɢɪɴɴɪɴɢ ᴏꜰ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ɴᴇᴡ

[𝐶ℎ𝑟𝑖𝑠 𝑠𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑜𝑙𝑜 𝑥 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟]

𝘚𝘜𝘔𝘔𝘈𝘙𝘠: ʏ/ɴ ʜᴀꜱ ᴀʙᴜꜱɪᴠᴇ ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴏɴᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ꜱʜᴇ ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅᴇꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴇꜱᴄᴀᴘᴇ

[ANGST/FLUFF]

WARNINGS: Abusive parents, mentioning of suicide, physical violence and mentioning of it but not much cause I don't wanna traumatize people 😭

PLAYLIST:

Freaks by surf curse

Embrace by pastel ghost

Daddy issues by the neighborhood

Black out days by phantogram

[I RECOMMEND THE SLOWED VERSION]

BEFORE READING

- english is not my first language so if I make some mistakes tell me

- i never wrote an angst before so please don't judge :')

- this is inspired by my situation unfortunately so if you're in too I just wanted to say that I'm here if you wanna talk 🫶

⋆｡‧₊°♱༺𓆩❦︎𓆪༻♱༉‧₊˚.⋆｡‧₊°♱༺𓆩❦︎𓆪༻♱༉‧₊˚.

-we are tired of your behavior!- me and my parents are arguing as usual

They're abusive and hit me without a reason since I was a baby and this made me develop depression and really high switching moods

-you're tired? I should be tired of yours!- I scream meaning every word I said

I am infact tired of all of this

I used to be the most happy kid in the world when I was little and they managed to break her entirely like a piece of glass

She was too young to understand at the time but I'll take revenge for her

They won't hurt her ever again

Tears try to make their way down my cheeks

“I can do it, I know I can” I think

-you’re such an ungrateful bitch! We did so much for you and you pay us back like this?- my dad gets closer and I get scared

“Please don't hit me…”

In fact he does

He hits me in the face

Tears finally start to roll down my eyes and I feel my head hurting so bad

-we do this cause we love you- my mom says, worst excuse ever

-if you really loved me you wouldn't hurt me- I run to my room and close the door with my key so they won't enter

As soon as I do that I sit down with my back laying to the entrance

I need to escape

It's 10 pm and my parents are sleeping

I take the chance and get out of the house by the window to not wake them up

Bringing with me some clothes and other important things, I head myself to Chris and his brothers's house

He's my boyfriend and I know I can always count on him

I text him that I'm coming

15 minutes after

I knock at their home and Chris opens the door letting me in

-y/n, I love you and all but I need to know what happened- I never told them about the things that happen in my house

-fine...but first let's sit on the couch- we do as I say and I explain everything that has been going on with my parents and my mental health

You can tell by his face that he's angry at them, just hate for the actions that they did to this poor soul that just needed love and protection

The people that had to give them the most instead managed to break her whole

If he was them he would've treated her better

She's his everything and he won't tolerate to see his precious girl feel like that

-i don't know what to do...- I cry because of all the accumulated stress that I had

The boy hugs me, really worried for my mental and physical health

-honey, I'm here don't worry- he caresses my head slowly

I manage to calm down

He kisses my forehead

-thank you, love- I softly smile and he does too

-can I know why you didn't tell me before?- Chris asks

-i was worried that you wouldn't have believed me, like the others- I explain -nobody helped me so I tried to end it all some months ago but it didn't work...-

My boyfriend caresses my cheek and I close my eyes trying to relax for a moment, I don't want to cry again

-im gonna help you- he suddenly says -you can live with us so you won't see your parents again- I open my eyes and look at him

I couldn't believe it

-really? oh my god, thank you so much!- I kiss him, It was slow and passionate

Some seconds after we detach

-anything to see you happy- he takes my hands and I smile again

We head to his bed and lay on it cuddling till we both fall asleep

Its the beginning of something new

.˳·˖✶𓆩𓁺𓆪✶˖·˳..˳·˖✶𓆩𓁺𓆪✶˖·˳..˳·˖✶𓆩𓁺𓆪✶˖·˳.

It's really short so I apologize 😭🙏

BYE <3

[scalproie]

HEE HO

AsuLili

3, 6, 10, 31,36

XiaoJin

1, 60, 55, 12, 10

J FROST IS LUCKY HES BLUE AND HAS ICE POWERS

(Also dont kill me for the Asulili im not as versed as you)

3. Do they wear the other’s clothes? (sweatshirt, bandana, necklace, etc.)

*laughs in canon clothes swap in t8 customization* but fr i dont think asuka would willingly wear lili's clothes bc its not her style and the same would be true for lili. BUT when lili start to gift asuka clothes, I feel she would eventually wear the kinda clothes she buy for her gf herself, making asuka want to wear them in return.

6. Who would beg the other not to leave? Who has to leave to protect the other?

I FEEL like both of those would be lili. bc lili is the one making an active choice to be in asuka's life, so it would be her who'd have to swallow her pride and beg for asuka to stay, all the while being the one who'd be ready to leave to protect asuka, bc in her mind, pre-dating, she deep down would think/know that her presence isnt essential in asuka's life (it wouldnt be true but yknow)

10. Describe their first date.

When they decide to actually start dating, I feel their first date would be kinda jarring to asuka bc in her mind, she'd picture lili doing exactly what lili has always done, with the extravagance she's bring to everything, the roses, the everything... but the actual date is much more reserved bc in lili's mind, smth has changed yknow? This has a touch of seriousness to the situation that wasnt there before, and maybe, just maybe, lili is a bit more nervous about this now.

31. Can they sit side by side without touching the other or are they handsy? (lacing fingers, touching knees, etc.)

I feel asuka would be kinda handsy bc thats the protectiveness talking, she would barely even notice that shes doing it, someone would be talking to either of them about lili in particular and asuka would have to have a physical contact with her.

36. Who’s more likely to fire up the stove at 2am because the other woke up in the middle of the night hungry?

Again. Asuka. She's someone who finds concrete solutions to problems, and if lili wakes up hungry well there is only one way to solve that. "Its rotten work, especially if its you. I mean i'll do it but christ alive"

And now Xiaojin!

1. Who would end a heated argument by defending their actions with ‘because I love you!’ ?

Xiaoyuuu like MAYBE post-t8, jin could end up in that situation but for the most part it'd be xiaoyu, again, pre-t8, jin would have trouble coming to terms as to why someone would do any kind of extreme actions for HIM so this would be xiaoyu's argument ender. She'd immediately be embarassed after saying it while jin bluescreen

10. Describe their first date.

AMUSEMENT PARK BABEYYY like man. Literally what better for them to reconnect as friends and get used to hang out as lovers? With xiaoyu's special interest and a place jin is sure to enjoy experiencing for most likely the first time where he get just to have fun?

12. Do they have many heated arguments? How do they smooth things over?

I dont think they have many arguments and in those, jin would be particularly apologetic anyway. His loved ones are everything to him so naturally he would try to make her heard and find together a solution to whatever problem theyre having that would have them argue anyway. That and he also feels like a "my girlfriend is mad at me. I hope I die" kinda guy.

55. Do they like watching clouds or star gazing?

Both, watching clouds turns into star gazing eventually and this is more jin's thing like he would show xiaoyu the clear sky of yakushima and she's happy to share that with him

60. Who pulls the other closer when they’re sleeping?

Xiaoyu does it sometimes bc like. she's finally found him :) but most of the time its Jin, he likes that kind of comfort to having her close to him and not being scared of harming her despite himself

[djljpanda]

can you make a wednesday fic inspired by the song Snowman - Sia?

Honestly I Love Listening To That Song During This Time Of Year. Giving Me of An Idea.

"Don't cry, Snowman, Don't you fear the sun", "I want you to know that im never leaving cause im Mrs.Snow, 'Til death we'll be freezing"

Tw/ Angst

⛄

It was supposed to be a great Christmas as this you and Wednesday first Christmas as a married couple. But you had fallen sick and from doctors you weren't going to get better as this might be your last Christmas.

This wasn't what Wednesday had wanted as what will she do when your gone. Who ever is doing this may be more cruel than the devil himself and that is not a compliment.

Your skin was becoming pale, your hands are bone like, and you are now stuck at your bed. You looked out your window only to see the snow fall and when you were a child you always played in the snow but by doctors and Wednesday orders you must stay in bed.

But that didnt stop you from dreaming about it.

It was December 24, Christmas eve and you woke up seeing Wednesday bring some tea for you. "Thanks love" "Your welcome, I did add a bit of honey in your tea" "No wonder its so good". You took a sip at ypur tea placing it down on the table next to the bed. "Love" "Yes Amour" "Can we go out into the snow today" "Y/n I keep telling you, you can't go out it can hurt you even more" "But love I-" "No you must stay in this bed Y/n" "Wednesday you don't think I like laying here 24/7" "I know-" "No you don't all I want to do is play in the snow with my wife and not just be locked up as a prisoner".

You looked at Wednesday who for once a blue moon looked sad as tears were forming. "Love im sorry I made you cry i'll stay in bed just don't cry not infront of me" "No it's just I see how hard it is for you. But I can't lose you Amour, im scared".

"Don't be scared love we will push through this as it is the Christmas season a miracle can always happen", you said opening your arms out for her as she came and you held her.

"Than let's go outside" "You sure love" "We can build a snowman", you both went outside as you held onto your wife. Your eyes shined when you saw the snow as you both went into the snow.

That whole time you dragged Wednesday as you played in the snow. When you finally made your snowman you asked Wednesday to take a picture and she did as when she looked at it she can see your bright smile.

That night Wednesday held onto you never wanting you leave her. "I promise i will never leave you my love, so don't worry i will never let death do us part", no matter in any situation you always made het feel better. Only you can make her feel any real emotions.

[shanesbluechicken]

Im back and i see you doing mythical creature reader requests 👀

Not really a mytical creature but could I ask for a Shane x male! Death! Reader? Like the reader is a reaper and the embodiment of death, which is a bit funny because he runs a farm and takes care of animals

I also think it would be funny if reader uses his own scythe to cut weeds and they immedietly wilt under the blade

-🦝

The farmer is the grim reaper (Shane)

So I know you requested a male farmer, but I noticed that I totally forgot to mention it anywhere when I finished. But I didn't write down any scenes or opportunities that would need a specification so I hope that this neutral version suits you as well❤

If you still want it changed then let me know in the ask box and I'll write it over immediately🤗

TW: mentions of death, mentions of suicide, mentions of alcohol

Gender: neutral

Of course he knew from the beginning that you're a little bit different. From your whole strange ominous aura to that oddly looking scythe. It's just weird to have something like that when you're living in a city, but maybe you used to have a separate garden outside of it? Who knows?

Since you didn't have a kitchen when you first moved into the old farm Marnie made him bring food over from time to time. In these times he noticed how you never used your own scythe to cut down the grass and you somehow always seem to know when he was coming over. Even without him or Marnie announcing it to you beforehand.

He would stand behind you with the box and you already knew it was Shane by saying his name. That never failed to send a slight shiver down his spine.

That one night when he was laying at the edge of the cliff surrounded by empty beer cans he saw a black, hooded figure walk up to him. No, it couldn't be described as walking, it seemed more like they were floating over the ground. Not even the light breeze was able to move the dark cloak that covered their entire appearance, making it impossible to see how they looked like.

Maybe it was his drunk mind, but it looked like the figure froze in their tracks as they came closer and they shook their head slightly.

"Now is not your time."

It wasn't just one singular voice talking to him. It was as if the entire world population was speaking through their mouth like a large group of people talking at the same time. Then as slowly as they arrived, they vanished into the night.

What the figure didn't realize is that Shane recognized the scythe they held during their encounter. It was most definitely yours.

For the next days he couldn't shake off the feeling that he escaped something and he had his theories, but his mind refused to believe in them. Considering the situation and the way you looked it honestly seemed like he was about to die and that you were were grim reaper who came for him. Only that he was still very much alive.

All of that leads to this exact moment. Shane is pacing like a tiger in a cage infront of your porch, mumbling nonsense like a lunatic. The events of that night haunt him in his dreams everytime he falls asleep and every morning he wakes up drenched in his on sweat and clinging onto his chest.

The second you open the door the words just burst out of him.

"You think this is a fucking joke?!"

"Shane, what-"

"You like scaring the shit out of me like that, huh? Is that funny to you? Do you find it funny mocking me like this?"

He wouldn't have been surprised if the entire town heard him. Shane doesn't remember the last time he YELLED like this at anyone.

Oddly enough you don't even flinch. You simply close your eyes and let out a tired sigh as if he was some salesman coming to your door to talk you into a bad insurance contract.

"Come inside. We need to talk."

He expected a slap in the face or for you to scream back at least just as loud. Not this. Telling him calmly to enter your house.

That's when his wild theories and suspicions got confirmed. There is a mix of emotions clashing deep inside of him. A part of him hoped you were indeed just mocking him back then and the other part hoped that you weren't that cruel.

"Wait so...you're THE grim reaper?"

"I'm ONE grim reaper."

"So there are several?"

"Of course! If I'd be the only one then I wouldn't be able to take care of this farm wouldn't I?"

Much to your surprise he takes the information very well. You just have to expect to be bombarded with a lot of questions. Some more ridiculous than others.

"Can one apply to this job normally?"

"So you're basically working in customer service?"

"Do you have something similar to company parties where all the grim reapers meet up, talk about the weather and drink punch?"

But you're beyond happy to see that he isn't scared or freaked out at all and it feels like a weight fell off your shoulders. It's nice to finally share this with someone.

"Do you decide who dies and who doesn't?"

"No, we just pick up the souls to help them pass."

"Then what happened? At the cliff? You didn't show up to say hi, that's for sure."

The look on your face suddenly turns incredibly serious. It's obvious that you're fighting with yourself, whether you should answer his question or not.

"I cheated death that night. I broke our rules by letting you live."

"Why?"

"I didn't want you to die. It was an act of selfishness."

"Do you regret it?"

"Absolutely not."

There is an awfully long pause in which neither of you said anything. Your eyes looked up at the stars and the light of the torches around your house gave your face a mysterious look. That's when he realizes that your beauty is undeniable and completely out of this world. His heart is nearly beating out of his chest and his throat feels incredibly dry. What is this feeling? Shane can't find the words for it, but your enchanting appearance feels like a force of nature. It makes his knees weak.

"How exactly does that work? Isn't every person's fate set in stone or some similar bullshit?"

"Nothing is set in stone. Every person has a variety of futures ahead of them and it's impossible to predict which one of them will come true. Only once in every human's life they align and share the exact same outcome. They die."

"How am I alive then?"

"Your death was inevitable as well, but I still looked through your futures in hopes to find a hole, an alternative so that you can continue life. While I searched I came across a future, burried deeply underneath the other ones. I walk away and grant you temporary immortality."

He's speechless, doesn't even realize that his hands are shaking. Shane has no idea what to think of your confession, but he does set a goal for himself. You may never regret saving his life, but he won't take any chances. He will make sure to get the most out of his life starting right now.

Masterlist

[supergigabigboybabechad]

She/they, bisexual, asexual, 19 (I tried to make it less formal sorry if it looks formal still. 💜)

I have blueish-gray eyes with red hair that's in a side shave (like one side on my hair is shaved). I am chubby, I have tons of freckles except on my face. I like wearing emo style clothes or comfy clothes like hoodies and sweats. I hate dresses and shorts, I don't like showing off skin. (If you need I picture I can send you one in dm or I can send a picrew).

Likes: anything with drawing/painting, games including board games.

Dislikes: uhhh spiders, driving (I refuse to get a driver's license it's a huge fear of mine.) I'm not scared of being in a car just driving it.

Isfp-t or my kin itto and scaramouche, I am a cancer. People say I have rbf (resting bitch face). Though I am really nice to people, unless they mess with the people I care about then I couldn't care less about them. I try to be helpful when I can. When I am around people I know, I can be loud and talkative (the loud part isn't on purpose it's just when I'm happy or excited). I tend to put people a lot before myself. I don't really like talking about my personal issues to anyone and can be known as the therapy friend. It's the opposite though when I'm around people I don't know, I'll be quiet and not wanting to interact. I have adhd, depression and anxiety (wonderful I know). When I do get upset I don't talk and won't interact until I have calmed down. I do cuss a lot though I'm more careful when I'm around kids/people I don't know. If I have a fight with someone I prefer to sit and talk it out and hate it when they walk away from me when I'm just trying to talk to them.

Hii!! Im sorry this took so long I wanted to make sure you’d definitely love it and I couldn’t do much over weekdays but weekends are for double time! So here you go!❤️ (order is less to most compatible imo!🔥)

Azul Ashengrotto

Azul would REALLY appreciate you wanting to talk things out during a fight, as well as how easy you are to talk to!

Azul has insecurities himself, so it’s safe to say he’d get scared you’d leave him if you left your fight without resolving anything, with his nature in general, pretty sure he hates loose ends

Once you’ve talked things out while being civil and mature, he’d ask “So, could we call this situation resolved?”

The way his voice shakes a little you can tell he’s worried

Upon hearing no and that it was just a conversation to better understand each other, that now that you’ve resolved the issue you can both better work to avoid it next time, not only is he relieved but he’s smitten with how smart you are!

Azul is overworks himself too. Top ranking student with a successful business, theres definitely a lot on his mind…

Luckily you’d be there to support him, he wouldn’t want to appear weak to you so if you asked him what was wrong he’d respond with the usual “just tired”

Urge him to take the break he so desperately needs so he can just sit with you

His jacket’s not very comfortable so if you’d offer him your hoodie he’d bashfully accept and lean on you

He likes that you’re chubby! It kind of hits home for him with his past but the way you’re so beautiful dare he say your size adding to such beauty it soothes his past wounds

He would love to play board games with you!! He’d take you up at every challenge

He might let you win if he’s feeling especially benevolent but if you beat him on your own accord he’d keep challenging you till he won

If it’s largely a skill based game it would bother him so much that he’d devote hours to practice just to be able to win

Azul would understand your anxiety due to his own, he may not experience it the way you do but he sure knows how it feels

He’d drag you to the vip room where you could have time to think

If you’re willing to talk to him he’d walk you through your thoughts and help you rationalize what’s going on

He’d also get Jade or Floyd to bring you some food and refreshments, on the house of course, to make sure you’re in the right headspace

If you wanted to help him out while he works he’s really appreciate it! Being helpful to him, trying to decrease his workload, he feels cared for

That and any time with you relaxes him, suddenly paperwork feels less like a chore.

Silver

Upon first meeting you silver wouldn’t be deterred by your rbf (he has one too). He’d speak to you in his overly formal way.

He wouldn’t mind you being quite or not talking much either, with his caring nature, he’d often come to you just to check in and make sure you’re okay

Silver is very much an acts of service lover. He’d take care of all the spiders for you! He wouldn’t kill them he’d carefully scoop them out and leave them far away from you.

He’d assure you everything is alright and taken care of. Then being knightly as he is, he’d ask if you need anything and bring you a glass of water.

Always going the extra mile to ensure your safety and well being he’d sit beside you, just in case you needed anything.

Speaking of, he’d always be there to comfort you when you’re struggling with your mental health

I cant say he’d know exactly what to do the first time he sees you having a panic attack.

He’ll try his best to comfort you but be hesitant knowing the fragility of the situation. What he will do though is research on how to better help you the next time, he’d speak to you exactly about it as well, not during your attack but he’d bring it up casually

While taking you out on a date in the forest, woodland creatures surround you both having in a relaxed state.

“The other day, how often does that happen?____ Mmh.. I see, I’m sorry, the next time, even if I’m not there, I want you to come to me. What can I do to help you?”

This applies to anxieties about your relationship with him as well.

If you’re anxious about anything in your relationship, it will hurt his heart to know you feel that way and he’s do anything to make sure you have no reasonable doubt in his love for you.

Silver would love your painting.

If you ever wanted inspiration to paint or draw anything outside he’d accompany you out into the forest

Creatures would come running to him wherever you are giving you a lovely scene to spark inspiration. He might fall asleep while your painting but with all the animals around him and the soft light hitting him you might end up with him on your canvas

He’d be flustered to find that he was the muse of your latest work (very flustered)

“Oh this.. No it’s nice the technique, you’re very skilled.. I just…” he wouldn’t be able to properly express how happy he is

Silver would also encourage you to talk about your personal problems. As your knight and lover, it’s his job to make sure you’re happy and safe

He’d know when you’re upset and ask you about it but he doesn’t want to push, he’d encourage you to tell him but if you’re uncomfortable he wouldn’t force it.

Instead, he’d show you acts of service, taking you out for a walk or just all together refusing to let you be alone

With Silver you’d never feel lonely and you’d always have someone there for you, and someone who will put you first the way you do for others

Leona Kingscholar

This seems like a very unlikely pairing i know, but I feel like you’d really compliment each other!

Can’t say your first impressions of him would be great.. he’d definitely be a bit very rude but generally, i don’t think he’d make any personal attacks, I don’t think he really does so in general he’s just kinda bitchy

You wouldn’t understand what he has against you and try to ask about it. He wouldn’t be receptive at first, if you really think about it, nobody’s really put effort into trying to understand him. You’ll receive push back when trying to understand him

Once he realizes you’re truly trying to have a conversation, he doesn’t know how to take it, he’s touched deep down though, he won’t show it of course but from then on he’s acted more…neutral towards you?

Putting others way before yourself?? He won’t have it, he doesn’t care if you’re nice to people that’s none of his business, but he won’t let you do anything to harm yourself

As lovers, he wouldn’t give you sweet words, but you can tell he speaks to you softer than anyone else, but when it comes to things like this, where you’re indulging in unhealthy habits, he’s much more stern

“Hey herbivore, there’s a difference between being helpful and being a pushover. Do you really want to be doing that?”

If you don’t give in and take care of yourself first, he’ll grab you for a nap

“We’ll I need your help too. I’m your boyfriend, shouldn’t I take priority, i need to be comfortable while I sleep….. Hah? What about them, I’ll tell them you’re busy”

He’d love your comfy clothes and soft body! It’s more comfortable for him when he holds you.

The way you’re protective of the people you care about? Be ready to be on the receiving end x2

If anyone even slightly mistreated you while he’s around, he’d demand things be made right and that you receive an earnest apology

He’ll drive you around too! Or he’ll have someone take you, he’s so reluctant to show how much he cares for you with his words but he’ll do things for you that you know he wouldn’t do for anyone else

If you want him to play a board game, he might make a comment on how childish it is but willingly join you

Unless it’s chess he’d willingly challenge you, if you express desire to play video games though he’ll blow you off about not having any, but the next time you see him he has a console with competitive games for you to play together, he claims it’s because beating you is fun any way so might as well expand his horizons

As for your anxiety? If he notices you’re anxious, he’ll say he wants to ditch and take you somewhere quiet

“Hey, what’s going on with you?” The lack of attitude in his voice gives away his genuine worry. If you don’t respond or say you don’t want to talk about it, he’ll sigh, sit you down beside him and just lean you against his chest where you can hear his heart beat.

Keeping his hand on your head so you can’t move away, whether he intended it or not the sound of his heart beat would soothe you.

His hearing is highly sensitive so he’ll know when you’re feeling better due to your breathing. “Do you wanna tell me know? Or do you wanna stay there?”

Leona would be what you’re missing, he’d stand up for you and make sure you’re first. But at the same time you’d be what he’s missing too, no one has taken the time to truly listen to him, what he thinks or what he feels, with you he feels heard.

Idia Shroud

With how introverted you’d both be at first, you probably got close through board game club

Idia gets more talkative when he’s in a competitive mood which would likely lead you both to opening up while playing

His competitive spirit might bring out something in you too leading to your board game matches to become a more frequent thing (you’re more normal about games than Azul)

I have no proof other than pure gut instinct but I feel this VERY STEONGLY HE WOULD LOVE YOUR FRECKLES HE WOULD LOVE THEM SO MUCH I KNOW HE WOULD

Later into the relationship, he’d hold your face and kiss them as a greeting, afterwards he’d pull back and admire them while lightly brushing over them with his thumb(HE WOULD TRUST)

He loves your style! But he REALLY LOVES your hoodies, if you accidentally forget one in his room, he wont give it back, even when asked about it he’ll claim to have never seen it

He’d get really embarrassed if you asked to wear his racket though, no mater how close you are he’d want so badly to say yes but just wouldn’t be able to get the words out

You wouldn’t have to worry about driving! Idia would just whip you up a car that you don’t have to drive

Spiders though? You’d have to fight about who has to kill them…

Idia has a bad habit of saying the wrong thing, he doesn’t mean any harm but he doesn’t get much social interaction so the things he says can come off in the wrong way, that’s why he appreciates how understanding you are!

If you were to talk to him about it he’d rephrase what he said to better fit what he meant

If you yelled at him he’d cry so the way you approach him in such a mature and understanding way is so comforting, any worries he had about confrontation with you are gone

He understands your anxiety, very much so

He’d walk you through a whole exercise if your experiencing anxiety with him, then he’d give you a piece of candy(he always has some on him) and tell you to focus on enjoying the sweetness of it while walking you through a breathing excercise

He has hella video games too! He’d bring you over to play them, he’s playing to win too, I hope you’re in the mood for some friendly trash talk

Before he knows it, he finds himself comfortable with you, comfortable enough to be himself letting him feel safe with you im sure he hopes you feel the same way about him

——————————————P.S. Your style sounds so cool and ur hair style too! (Also I love freckles!!)

[blankwashed]

Sleepless Shadows (Part 3)

Chapter: I II III IV V VI VII

Recap: Satoru hugged your waist to try and bring you down. "It's okay it's no big deal. Just finish your meal and we'll be on our way okay? I don't like how people are looking at us with their judgmental eyes," he says to your ears.

You nod your head and try to finish your meal without getting stomach pains.

“All done?” Satoru looks at you after you slurped up the last bit from the stew, with a slight smile on his face.

You nod and try to bow your head to him as respect but he lifted your chin up.

“It’s fine darling, you can repay me in other ways. Like scoring a good score on our coming exams, okay?” He crooned, with a slight smirk on his lips.

Your face was red again as you were thinking of other ways you could repay him, ways that he will be gripping onto your hair, pushing you closer to him-. What?

“He’s just my lecturer, this is unethical as he says,” The thought nestled in your mind as you let out a sigh. If only you were a few years older, if only you were his type, if only you met him outside of class, if only-

His lips were glistening after he licked his lips, a bad habit of his.

“Let’s get back to the car, y/n.” He said, with a gleam in his eyes.

“Mm..” you didn’t want to go back home. You wanted to spend more time with him even though your body was crying out for sleep at this point, especially after eating so much at this time at night.

You dragged your feet to the passenger’s seat of his car which does not open for you this time, and you wondered why. As many times as you try to open the door, it won't budge. That's strange, it was fine before.

"Mr. Gojo? W-Why does my side of the door not work anymore? Could you help me from your side?"

Satoru quickly comes to you as he sees that you're having a dilemma. When he reaches the car, he pats his pockets and his face turned pale.

"Oh shit…" He swore, quite loudly. When the gears in your brain clicked, you realised. He left the car keys inside the car.

"Shit shit shit," He continued swearing with a worrisome face, which was quite different from his usual respected teacher-self. This did not help the situation at all as you didn't know what you could do.

"Shit, everyone is probably still sleeping and I don't want to wake them up…" He mumbles under his breath, still with a worried face.

You bit your lip, equally as worried but not so as you would be stranded with your favourite lecturer. Besides, you don't have classes the next day.

"Sir, I know this isn't the appropriate timing but I don't think you have classes tomorrow either. This predicament that we've gotten ourselves into is not really that bad? I'm sure you could call a tow truck or professionals to get your car opened tomorrow. " You try to make Satoru not worry that much, besides, you're sure that he's not married, right? No one would be waiting for him at home, right?

"I know, I know I just thought this night was going to be perfect, you know? Just me and you and-" He stops himself from continuing as he worries that he might scare you off.

Shucks, you were blushing. It was a chilly night, no doubt but you just felt that it was summer on your cheeks.

"I'm sorry, y/n. I should've known better and as your lecturer this mistake is very unacceptable for me to make," Satoru looks down at his feet while talking to you, as if he's a teenager again which you find quite cute.

"No big deal, sir. Anyways, I noticed that there's a motel nearby while we were driving here. We can sleep there for tonight, what do you think about that?" You adjusted your eyes onto his, making sure he's not sad anymore.

It took Satoru some time till he answered you.

"Sure, let's go get a room."

this was due weeks ago, ive just been really busy with uni and when im not busy, im either sleeping or playing games ;_; its sunday today and tomorrow i'll be back in uni grinding for i dont even know what lol.

[bobatelevision]

i had to put my sweet baby down yesterday...

on thursday morning he was fine, eating and drinking fine. nothing out of the ordinary. thursday night he seems to have trouble breathing, he had discharge around his eyes, and kept making these pained noises I've never heard him make before. he had no appetite and wasnt drinking water. i bought some critical care to try force feeding him but he wasnt accepting it at all and tried to give him a mix of pedialyte + water to get him fluids and he accepted some but not a lot. i thought he maybe had some upper respiratory infection and maybe needed antibiotics, so i started calling some veterinarians in my area.

it was really late at night too so i called around and had such a hard time finding a vet to treat him bc most of the animal hospitals either:

-serviced guinea pigs

-their exotic vet wasnt in that night

-serviced guinea pigs but was closed

i was scared to even go to sleep that night bc his conditioned looked so bad, i didnt think he would even make it to the morning. but he managed to survive the night, so i called around again and was able to find a vet about 40 min away that could take him. we enter the hospital and they immediately take him in and i was in the waiting room. the doc comes out to talk to me to explain what was happening.

he had a stone in his bladder that was blocking his urethra and he couldn't urinate. bladder stones can be very life threatening bc if an animal cant pee, it can develop an infection (sepsis) and even get a heart attack. when she examined him, everytime she palpated his bladder he would be in pain, so they gave him a pain injection. they lead me into a room to explain what his treatment would consist of, and i was fucking shocked.

nearly $5k for his surgery and treatment, i couldn't fucking believe it. the worst part is there really was no plan b on his treatment that wasn't euthanasia. i felt so fucking sick, but i had to think on it more. i thought about maybe calling other animal hospitals but i already had a lot of trouble trying to find anyone to treat him at all, and even if there was a miracle situation where i could afford his treatment, it would not guarantee that he wouldnt fall ill again. on top of the fact that guinea pigs are really fragile creatures and dont have very long life spans. the procedure is incredibly invasive and could put so much stress on his little body. i didnt want him to be in more pain than he really was.

so i made the tough decision on putting him down, because i didn't want him to suffer any longer. i'm so heartbroken bc although i knew we would part ways one day, i didnt imagine it would be so soon. we spent past 3 years together, i adopted him mid pandemic bc being stuck in a different country from the rest of my family is incredibly isolating. i gave him so much love and spoiled him so much. he ate veggies & hay to his hearts content, would start cui-cuing at the sound of a bag being opened, he got to sleep in the largest and comfiest pet beds. he used to sleep on my nap while i gamed or watched shows. he was very skittish with people, except for me bc he knew i would give him the world. i'm feeling so defeated rn. i stayed with him til the very last moment, he was very sedated but soo cuddly in the last hour. the only thing to bring me peace of mind is knowing he was relaxed and in no pain in his final moments.

he doesn't know the amount of people that love him around the world, even as far as Australia. he had an impact on many people. all my irls and my online friends absolutely adored him. even my mom, who is deathly afraid of rodents, thought he was so cute and precious bc of how fluffy he is. his departure left a huge hole in my heart. when i got back home, i bursted into tears looking at his empty enclosure. im so used to him jumping around and getting quirked up when he hears me enter my room. i just cant believe i'll never get to see him, or hold him, or even feed him again.

Rest in Peace, my beloved Taro.

I love you so dearly, you may very little but you had a very huge heart.. and appetite. You will always be missed and I hope you are enjoying large quantities of lettuce in cui cui heaven.