#but then my moots started playing it and i got fomo

[dotster001]

I just got the craziest love and deep space ad on YouTube and I ran to tell you guys about it!

Basically, it was

*Radio announcer voice.*

You know what they say

Any man can be a father but it takes a hot middle aged guy with a job to be a daddy

And, of course, I wasn't paying attention because YouTube is background noise for me, but I was like "wtf is this ad for?"

I look at the video, and it's For Love and Deep Space. Specifically, Zayne. 😭

Specifically! This card! Which is no longer available!

I'm so shaken 😭 I'm alone right now, but I out loud, with the nastiest voice crack, went "what!?"

[sticher30]

🎀 list 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the ask box for the last 10 people who liked or reblogged something from you! get to know your moots or followers <3

-@letsgoricciardo

Ooh ok five things that make me happy.

My friends I got from this year. I've always had a slight FOMO and a little bit of an imposter syndrome in relation to friends. This is defininetly been actually nice for me, I actually haven't felt anything related to an imposter syndrome this year since I left for university. So I'm really happy to have made the friends I did.

Editing. Editing has always been a form of art that I love to do. I'm still on the newer side of things (like I'm about to hit 5 years now). I've actually made insta moots with editors that I like looked up to. One of them I even got slightly close to and did a lil animal crossing prom thing in a discord with them which was insane. I mean it's crazy when these people you've watched make edits and aspire to make edit slike them, suddenly become mutuals with you on instagram. I started on insta and now I'm on tt. I started with RvB and I went back to RvB after the era we do not talk about but I'm also doing f1 and fe edits.

Motorsports. I've always been a sports jumper. I started with MLB then went to NBA and then NFL. I like to say that the more I get into a sport is based on the funny videos of them. MLB is obvious, I've seen all the old funny videos that I could tell you what happens in the clips. I've seen so many that I've seen so many repeat clips. NBA was more Luka for some reason, I think I liked his trick shot stuff. There isn't a lot of funny moments without involving someone in the negative light, which is different from MLB. Which I loved MLB funny moments that occured between the two teams. And then NFL just happened somehow with some funny things but not a lot. And then I found motorsports through a Brocedes edit. And I just fell in love through the funny moments. My parents sometimes ask me, how do I know so much f1 stuff, and I say it's because I consumed a lot of videos. Which I did, but majority were a funny complimation. And then suddenly formulawah made a guide to formula e, and there were quips in there that made me interested in watching fe. And suddenly now I'm watching all the lil funny montages they have up on the fe channels. And so yeah, f1 and fe make me happy.

Gaming. I play a lot of different genres of games (OXENFREE is my favorite totally recommend try playing it AAAAAAAA I could go on a whole ramble about this). Right now I have a fixation on Stardew Valley (especially with the new update) so I'm gonna binge play that. But I just love gaming, especially games with character designs and stories). And gaming just makes me happy.

Red vs Blue. It's like slightly also making me sad because it's ending (also everything Project Freelancer makes me sad (THERE IS LITERALLY A SONG THATS KINDA HAPPY AND VIBES ARE GOOD CALLED "We'll be coming back" BUT I GET SAD EVERYTIME BC SOMEONE ONCE COMPARED IT TO WASH AND THE FREELANCERS AND I JUST SCREAM) ahem anyways, yeah it can also make me sad). But it also makes me laugh a lot, and I love the characters dearly. Even if I scream in frustration when a fic on ao3 may not update in a month (bc the fandom is like half dead there ngl and that usually means discontinued sometimes). But I love Red vs Blue so much. I bought the fanbook, I bought some like slap bracelets. I just love it and it makes me happy. I could literally anaylyze every single character.

[leina-off-the-beaten-track]

Getting to Japan Pt.1

If I post this, that probably means I’ve successfully made it to the other side without the world imploding. That’s certainly how everything feels right now, just over a week before I’m set to fly to Osaka. My whole situation is, in fact, not the average situation for a student on a study abroad program. I was set to travel to Japan back in September 2021, but a combination of high Covid-19 cases, the Olympics and general bureaucratic stagnation meant that this was postponed time and time again, until the prospect of leaving for Japan seemed impossible. I adapted my life; to combat familial stress from studying abroad from the comfort of my bedroom in the UK - a situation many students will understand - I moved in with my boyfriend in his small house in Scotland. Many of my course mates returned to university accommodation, where things were returning to normalcy after our first year experiences were also marred by Covid-19.

I definitely felt a lot of FOMO, but at the same time, I was content with the pace of life in Scotland. At the start, I had only set out for this to be a two- or three-month situation, and when we received news that the borders were opening in November, my spirits were lifted. These were, inevitably, crushed almost immediately with the onset of ‘Omicron’ around Christmastime. Perhaps it was the January blues that got me down, but at this point, I practically gave up on the idea of going to Japan. Online lessons seemed like a chore, and a lot of my spare time was spent sleeping or playing sims 4, with the occasional, panicked study session. I felt quite empty for a while, but then I came to terms with my lot in this, and gave myself something to work towards. My boyfriend’s house was in the countryside, and though I had been getting by, cycling miles to get to the nearest town, it felt like prime time to learn to drive.

I really threw myself into this, at the time, intending to pass my test quickly so I could get a job more easily in the local area. I saved up enough to buy a cheap car, and with my boyfriend being a mechanic for his 9-5, were able to do some repairs fairly cheaply as well. I found myself getting better and better at driving, and combined with the better weather of spring, my spirits were so much better.

Then suddenly, the sky fell down on top of me like a weighted duvet: we were now permitted to travel to Japan, and our host university had been on the ball with registering the correct paperwork for us! I actually felt a little guilty about how I felt a little disappointed by this news. I had gotten comfortable; I’d settled in; most importantly, I now wouldn’t have enough time to pass my practical driving test before leaving! >:/ Myself and my course mates became a whirlwind, organising visas, setting up travel plans, organising sim cards for our stay, and so, so, so much paperwork.

Our finances were thrown into question when the Japanese government rescinded our JASSO (scholarship for foreign students), because we hadn’t entered Japan before March 2022. Obviously, this wasn’t our fault, but arguing was a moot point. So, the whirlwind of paperwork became even more frenzied as we completed last minute grant applications, travel insurance risk assessments etc.

And now, here we are, a week and a day before I fly (though I won’t post this until I arrive). The brunt of the work for moving abroad has been done now, I just have to pick up my visa and the Japanese yen I ordered in the coming week. I can start to think about all the fun things I can do when I travel, though it feels like I can see the shadow of Covid-19 in my peripheral vision. I decided to start writing this blog to show the honesty of moving abroad for a university program. It’s not sparkles and rainbows like a lot of study abroad influencers like to show, and I think it’s important that people see that. It’s not bad to be optimistic, and don’t get me wrong, I love to romanticise the shitty things in my life to make it feel less painful, but when posting it for others to see, it’s not right to lie to them either.

Of course, I also want my friends and family to come along with me on my travels, even if it’s through a screen. Maybe it’s just the way I was brought up, but I don’t care for cities…like at all. I tolerate cities as a means to an end, perhaps visiting some of the acclaimed sites of the places, but they are not for me. It might seem strange then, that I should want to travel to Japan, when most people associate it with its megacities and hyper-ubanisation. But, if anything, that’s exactly why I want to go to Japan. I want to follow the path less walked and see the sites you wouldn’t get a chance to see on a short tourist stay. Neither Tokyo’s imposing sky tree nor Akihabara’s flashing lights, are going to be gone any time soon. But the fleeting autumn colours of a forest-lined road in rural Wakayama? Perhaps I am a Heian poet at heart, to prefer the beauty in the impermanence of nature.

So come along with me, as I document my experiences of Japan off the beaten track.