#but there's a couple of people in the discord server that i just really need to be at 100 percent to deal with | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jemiswumbo · 4 months

Text

bulletproof love (18+)

twitchstreamer!luke x reader

author’s note: omgg this oneshot took all my blood sweat and tears to produce. i am NOT a graphic designer. i do NOT normally write smut. but this idea had to come to fruition before i went insane. HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY!!!!

title is from bulletproof love by pierce the veil. lyrics have no correlation but it IS a certified banger.

tags/warnings: smut!! minors dni. oral (m receiving). use of y/n. not proofread. kinda long. teeheehee etc.

You met Luke Castellan at the grocery store.

He looked like a completely normal (albeit, very attractive) guy in his twenties. His dark curls fell slightly over his warm, chocolate brown eyes. A mischievous smirk was plastered across his cheeks, showing off a small dimple on the left side. He wore a simple hoodie and sweats as he perused the pasta aisle, picking up different jars of sauce and reading the labels absentmindedly. He did, however, have an interesting scar sitting jagged over his cheekbone, but it was so faint that you hadn’t noticed it until way later on.

You would have never guessed he was a near millionaire with close to a million social media followers. You would have never guessed he spent the majority of his life not at the grocery store, but rather streaming FPS and RPG games for an average of fifty thousand views at a time.

You would have never guessed he’d take a liking to you.

You, who worked part time at this very grocery store. You, who didn’t really know the first thing about video games, except that they were confusing and it was insane that some people could build ridiculously complex structures at a mind-boggling speed on Fortnite whilst also shooting with godly precision.

He had backed into you accidentally whilst you were restocking a shelf, causing you to drop a couple glass jars that cracked open upon impact with the floor. You apologized, even though you’d really done nothing wrong. He obviously thought you attractive (or maybe he just didn’t leave the house much?) because his idea of an apology was taking you out to some lavishly expensive dinner the next night.

The dinner was okay but the conversation is what got you hooked. He was so sweet and told you so many wild stories that had you laughing until your chest ached. He paid for the meal and held your hand on the drive home. When he dropped you off, he casually told you his Instagram handle and told you to shoot him a follow. You blushed, smiled, and scurried inside.

You just about died when you saw his profile.

ii.

It’s been about a year since you had started dating Luke Castellan, otherwise known as his twitch handle “SonofHermes.”

(“Because he’s the messenger god, right? In, like, Greek Mythology? And I felt like a damned messenger god when I was a moderator for four different discord servers and a twitch chat—“)

Luke’s twitch streams occured mostly every night, from 8pm to about 3am. He always began his streams with some FPS game (Overwatch, Valorant, CS:GO, or something similar). After a few hours he would swap over to a different game for his variety segment. His chat was hilarious. They loved to tease Luke and joke around with him and donate silly messages. And, of course, because Luke was so very attractive, a decent chunk of his fan base was dedicated towards swooning over his every word and look and smile.

You, honestly, never really minded. Mostly because Luke was yours. You were sure the thirsting from chat would diminish once they knew you were dating. But… you really, truly, had no desire to be in the public eye. Having nearly a million people know your name and your face was daunting and scary. You also had enough common sense to realize that some of his fans were probably batshit crazy and would send you hate and death threats for dating Luke. You were a part time employee and a student; you did not need another reason on top of that to have poor mental health.

Luke loved you unconditionally and that was all that mattered. You were perfectly content spending most evenings to yourself. He was a good boyfriend, though, and did schedule days off to take you out and show you incredible amounts of love and support. You were both very happy and secure in your relationship.

One particular evening, you were staying over at Luke’s apartment. It was a Friday, and you had no work tomorrow, so he bought alcohol and weed and selected a list of movies to marathon. It was basically your most ideal way to spend the weekend.

That was, until, Luke’s gamer friends messaged him on discord, begging him to join their Rust server to defend their group base.

Luke had met these friends through Twitch events and game conventions. There was Percy, who streamed with his girlfriend Annabeth. They were one of the most adored couples in the gaming community. They all lived in the same state, so Luke hung out with them pretty often. There was also Grover, who was Percy’s roommate and would join his streams from time to time. As well, there was Thalia, who was a huge advocate for women in eSports, and played in a professional league. Luke had introduced them too you a few months ago, and they all swore to help keep your relationship a secret.

The five of them often played different games together, as most of their fanbases consisted of the same people, so it really raked in the views and made for good content. Plus, it was just really fun. You knew how much Luke loved his friends and cherished the times they got to play together.

The Rust server was a recent hyperfixation that you were positive would fade once a new MMO came out to grab their attention. But, you were also aware of how much time and effort Luke had spent constructing this base of his.

“Go,” you said, noticing his confliction. “You can have one hour to play. Stream, too, so I can watch out here. But after that, you’re mine for the rest of the night.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Luke said with his devilish grin. He kissed you hard, leaving a swarm of butterflies dancing in your stomach. He hurried off to his bedroom, where he kept his gaming setup, and shut the door.

You were fine with spending an hour alone. Flipping through Netflix, you cracked open a bottle of wine and relaxed into the sofa.

One hour went by fast. Luke didn’t return to the living room.

You picked up your phone and opened the Twitch app, clicking on Luke’s stream. He was currently in the middle of some intense adventure with Percy. Luke’s webcam was situated in the top left corner of the game feed, and he looked so cute and handsome under the glow of the monitor and the purple LED lights.

To be honest, the wine was getting to you. You felt such a strong desire to be near Luke and to feel him and be with him. He bit his lip on camera, deep in concentration, and that action alone had your heart rate increasing.

“Fuck it,” you said, turning off the TV and standing up from the couch. His hour was up, and it was time to take the matter into your own hands.

iii.

Luke enjoyed playing his games with the volume high in his headphones. It allowed him to feel like he was actually in the game, and unaware of the outside world. This also was an issue, because more often than not he would lose track of time and forget about his plans and scheduled events.

He just couldn’t help it — he loved video games. Currently, he was busy perfecting his base on Rust so it wouldn’t be broken into again. It took a lot of effort and concentration, and Percy and Grover dicking around and goofing off did nothing to help his focus.

So, it only made sense that he didn’t notice his bedroom door opening. The door wasn’t in frame on his camera, so he didn’t see it open, either. He didn’t notice it close. He didn’t notice you, getting down on all fours and crawling over to his desk setup.

He didn’t notice you, at all, until you put a hand on his leg.

Luke jumped a bit and glanced down, meeting your mischievous glance and the naughty smile on your cheeks.

“Uh, chat — sorry, gotta go to the bathroom, one sec —“ Luke rushed out. He shut off his camera and muted his mic, double checking that it was definitely muted by quickly scanning the latest messages in his chat:

He rolled his eyes at the messages, and pushed his chair back, glaring at you on the floor. “Baby, what the hell are you doing?!”

You smiled. “I was just missing you, is all.”

“So you snuck in — wait, shit, you said one hour. It’s been an hour hasn’t it?” Luke said, running a hand through his messy curls.

You nodded, and gave a weak shrug. “It’s okay, though. I think it would be fun if we also played a game of our own.”

Luke raised his eyebrows, feeling a blush form on his cheeks. “What’re .. what’re you suggesting?”

You unbuttoned your blouse and tossed to the floor, leaving you in a lacy black bra and your mini skirt. You let your fingers linger on the strap of your bra. “I’ll let you stream longer. But.. once you cum, you have to shut it off.”

“You want to blow me on stream?” Luke asked, incredulously. He could already feel himself start to harden at the thought of this ‘game’ of yours occurring.

“Like, secretly, though.” You said with a slight eye roll. “You can try to keep your composure for as long as you can, but you’ll be all mine for the rest of the night. Okay?”

Luke took a minute to ponder. If he somehow got caught… the consequences would be severe. His reputation would be tarnished. He’d lose his job and his income and the entire career he had worked so hard to build.

But on the other hand.. you looked really fucking sexy, staring at him with your doe-eyes, feigning innocence in the most seductive lingerie he’d ever seen you in.

“Fuck’s sake.” Luke pulled his chair back towards his desk. He tugged his sweatpants down to his ankles, giving you a face full of his half hard cock and his toned, muscular thighs. “You have to be quiet too, you little slut. I seriously cannot get caught.”

“Of course,” you replied, slightly moaning as you took his length into your hand. “You’re so incredibly attractive.”

“Shut up,” Luke said, adjusting his camera angle to absolutely ensure it cut off at his upper chest and nothing lower than that was visible. He took a deep breath and was about to rejoin his stream, when you began sucking him off. “Fuck!”

You pulled your lips off of him with a loud pop. “Come on, Lukey, you can last longer than that.”

“You’re mouth feels so fucking good though,” Luke groaned, threading his fingers through your hair. He took another deep breath and guided your head back to his cock, which was now fully hard and aching for your mouth. This time, when you licked up his shaft, he was more prepared and was able to maintain his chill composure. “Okay. Okay, baby, I’m turning my stuff back on. Be quiet, please.”

You nodded, slowly taking him back into your warm mouth.

Luke turned on his camera. He turned on his mic. He ran a hand through his hair and grabbed his mouse and keyboard. “Okay, I’m back. Chat, please tell me Percy and Thalia didn’t do anything stupid while I was gone.”

“Hey!” You heard, faintly from Luke’s headset. “We didn’t do anything, and if your chat says otherwise, they are lying!”

You giggled as quietly as you could, and clearly the vibrations from such movement felt good for Luke, because you heard him take a sharp intake of breath.

“Wh-whatever. Doesn’t matter. Let’s get back to work.” Luke said defensively.

“What?” Percy asked. “You sound weird, man. Is something wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong!” Luke replied, too quickly and at an octave higher than he normally speaks. You couldn’t help but get a little nervous. He was terrible at being subtle.

“Okay…” This was a girl’s voice, and sounded like Thalia. “My chat agrees that you’re being weird.”

“Same.” Percy agreed.

“Yeah, well,” Luke scanned his second monitor to check in on how his chat was reacting. He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “My chat is being dumb, as per usual.”

Below the desk, your nerves had subsided and instead you became preoccupied with the notion of possibly getting caught. It was kind of twisted but this caused your lower region to dampen. You lifted your short little skirt over your hips and moved your lacy underwear to the side, giving you access to finger yourself.

You moaned, with your mouth full of thick, heady cock, and brain slightly foggy from the wine consumption. You were close already.

“What?” Luke said, clearly reading something on his monitor. “Chat, that was my phone vibrating on my desk. I did not moan over that headshot Percy made. Be so for real”

“Rude,” Percy said. “I would’ve moaned. I’m like, the god of gaming.”

“Loser.” Luke responded, biting his lower lip and slightly bucking his hips into your mouth. He must’ve been getting close, too.

From that moment on, you were desperate to make Luke finish. You abandoned your slow and gentle place, and took his entire cock down your throat. You silently gagged, and bobbed your head up and down, making sure to suck a bit longer on his leaking tip. You grabbed his balls in your right hand and squeezed, keeping your left hand on his upper thigh.

“Fuck,” Luke murmured, just under his breath. You sucked harder in response. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

“What is going on, dude?” Percy questioned. “You’re stressing me out.”

Luke glanced over at his chat again.

Luke flipped a middle finger to his camera, and gave a playful, “Chat, you all suck.” Obviously, he loved his fans and was eternally grateful for their support. It was just fun to mess around with them and feign a love hate relationship. It did make him a bit anxious, however, that everyone easily picked up on the fact that something was affecting Luke. It didn’t exactly help that he was really close to finishing and was starting to lose track of what was happening in the game. All he could feel was his cock going in and out and in and out of your soft lips, that were now coated in a mixture of salvia and his precum. It was just about driving him insane.

You, on the other hand, were knuckle deep inside your own cunt and sucking Luke off with so much fervour your jaw was starting to ache. But you loved the feeling. And you were determined to get him off. Now.

Suddenly, Luke felt the familiar feeling build inside himself. Before he realized it was happening, he was shooting thick ropes down your eager throat. “Fuck!” he screamed, legs shaking and eyes squeezing shut. He shuddered and gasped for air as you did not let up on your pace, sucking every last drop of cum from him.

He realized how fucking weird this whole ordeal must’ve looked to his many (many, many) viewers.

Instead of confronting what just happened, he slammed his mouse on the End Stream button and shut off his computer, without so much as a goodbye. He pushed his chair back and grabbed your shoulders, pulling you up to your feet.

You smiled at him sweetly, a sheen of sweat covering your entire body. Luke leaned down and kissed you hungrily.

“Y/n,” he said, once he was out of breath from such an intense kiss. “I.. Need. To be inside of you. And you can never, ever do that again.”

“Mhmm,” you hummed innocently. “Kinda seemed like you really liked it though.”

“Oh, shut up.” Luke said with a grin. “Bed. Now.”

You obliged, heading over to his comfy queen sized bed, unaware that you were about to have the most mind blowing sex of your entire life.

authors note: aaaaa ok. first of all i’d like to apologize. i have not proofread this at all and i wrote each chunk on separate days. i will proofread it eventually and fix the errors lmao.

also! now that all the ~lore~ to this AU is sorted, if you ever wanna send me twitchstreamer!luke specific prompts, i would ADORE THAT.

thank you all again for reading !!!!! <3

taglist: @notacluelessblonde00 @lilyirlevans

#luke castellan x reader #luke castellan x you #luke castellan #percy jackson #pjo #jemiswriting #why am i so embarassed to post this…#oh wait i know #it’s bc i cannot write smut to save my life LOL! :)

575 notes · View notes

my-castles-crumbling · 1 month

Text

OMG Clandestine is done!

I am so so so excited to say I just posted the epilogue to Clandestine! Featuring a beautiful commission from @itslotuseater!

Ships: Jegulus, background wolfstar, dorlene, pandalily, rosekiller Rating: M Length: 142k (FINISHED! COMPLETED! AHH!)

Summary:

He was crying. “You can do that?” He repeated, feeling like he was in some sort of dream. And then, Sirius seemed to realize. Because for a twelve-year-old, he was decently smart, and knew him better than anyone. “D’you…d’you want to do that, Reggie? I thought…I thought it was just a game?” But he could only shake his head. Because it wasn't a game. He was a boy. And he could tell from Sirius's nervously resigned expression that Sirius knew it, too. "It's...not a game." --- There's not enough Trans Regulus Black, so here's a fic to help fix the problem. Rated mature for lots of references to transphobia and Walburga Black being a piece of shit. COMPLETED (I'm not crying, you are)

Ahhh, my long-winded thank-you note:

First and foremost, thank you to Arson, my amazing Alpha Reader who brainrotted with me throughout almost the entire process. I literally could not have finished this without you, and I am so thankful to have you in my life. You've helped me through so many cases of horrible Writer's Block, encouraged me whenever I needed it, and you're an amazing friend. I hope you love your "Barty and Evan's Bitch" shirt :D

Second, to my wife, who literally dealt with me talking about this fic for TEN MONTHS. You're literally the most amazing and supportive person in my life, and I love you more than words. Thank you for being the James to my Regulus.

Third, to my Beta Reader, Kat, who is still wading through the trenches of this fic finding all my mistakes. I am so glad to have you and thank you for dealing with all of my errors and answering my messages at odd hours of the night.

Fourth, to all of the people who have encouraged me: Abby, Danielle, Kelz, everyone on the discord servers who has seen me struggle, you guys are amazing and I am so thankful to you.

Fifth, to the lovely people who created fanart for this fic. You all are amazing and you brought this to life. I bow down to you, truly, you are so incredibly talented.

Sixth, to the people who I interviewed about dysphoria and being on T, so I could have a more well-rounded understanding about Regulus's experience. Though I identify as trans, I am so thankful that other trans people were willing to give their experiences in areas I wanted to describe as accurately as possible.

And last, to all of you, who read and kudosed and inboxed and recommended and commented and kept me going. You all are amazing, and you've made this such a positive experience. This fic really was for me, to work through my own gender an discover about myself, and I am so thankful you have been here along this journey.

I want to reiterate that this is one trans person's journey, but I think it's so important to have representation in all forms of media. I'm hoping that my version of Reggie has helped with that a little bit! He's my baby, and he deserves all the good things.

Keep an eye out for the B-sides of this fic! I'll add a chapter to this work linking to it, so if you're subscribed to this, you'll get an e-mail. I'll also be editing this work to fix all the errors, and I'll be doing the B-sides as I go. It probably won't be for a couple of weeks, since I am now working, and I won't have any strict posting schedule, but I'm excited for those as well!

I love you all. Thanks for being a part of this journey.

161 notes · View notes

husbandograveyard · 3 months

Text

This is my contribution to a Discord Server exchange. My recipient is @lale-txt - an honour, truly.

Henlo Lale, I am your [no longer secret] secret summer...santa? Fairy? Either way, I set out to write you a little thing and then it became a slightly bigger than little thing. I think it may actually be my longest Tumblr fic to date. I hope you enjoy it, I had quite a lot of fun writing it -it took me out of a writing slump even. You gave me SO MANY delicious prompts to work with, but I eventually settled for my very first instinct, fake dating / married with Tengen. Sending you loads of love!

Tengen Uzui x Fem!Reader - SFW - 5.0k words cw/notes: fake dating / fake marriage | mention of injuries | In series | a hint of angst but all comfort after | Readers body does not get described, but female pronouns are used, reader is referred to as wife, girlfriend, woman, etc. | Tengen has his wives, they are mentioned, but they are not actively in the story | Tengen is still an active Hashira |

“So let me get this straight…”

You were rubbing the bridge of your nose, trying to massage away the headache that was brewing. There was no way you’d be successful with the way this situation was going.

“You have not one, not two…but three wives. Yet you are asking me to pretend to be another one of your wives because…?”

“Because they are all out on their own missions and for this super-secret undercover one I have to have a partner otherwise they will not let me in.”

Tengen was smiling, eyes full of hope and sparkles, and you had to resist the urge to punch his beautiful face just to wipe the smirk off of it. He was so casual about it too, as if it was only logical, and you were the one confused about the situation.

You bit your lip, physically trying to bite back snarky remarks. An actual filter for your words, if you will, while your brain was too preoccupied trying to make sense of the situation. You sighed, taking another deep breath before clapping your hands together in front of your face, resting them against your lips and then pointing them at him, the only way to express your mixed annoyance and frustration.

“Tengen, first of all, the mission is not super-secret, we literally all just heard the details. Secondly, there are a multitude of ways for you to carry out the mission or infiltrate that do not entail you going undercover as a couple at the retreat!”

He held his hands up in defense, shaking his head at your arguments.

“That wouldn’t really be a flashy way of handling the situation. You know I need to do my work in my own way.”

You shook your head in response, but still indulged him a little by asking what was in it for you. A smile appeared on his lips, and you realized that you had just shown him your cards. You had shown a little interest in the plan, and that was all he needed to give you the final push towards agreeing with him.

“Well, you would be able to go on a deluxe retreat with me of all people”, he started his reasoning. You just rolled your eyes in response.

“It’s fully paid, and I will take care of you all weekend. Since you will be posing as one of my wives -or a girlfriend if you feel more comfortable just doing that, you will be treated the way I always treat my wives, which is a treat in and of itself.”

You raised an eyebrow, keeping up your skeptic facade, but you had to admit that it didn’t sound all that bad. Tengen may be a little peculiar, and definitely could stand to keep his mouth shut on more occasions, but you did know he was a wonderful partner, and going on a date -or this retreat- with him wouldn’t be a bad experience per se. Except for the obvious part: the demons who were the reason that this mission existed in the first place. It was as if he had read your mind though, speaking up to address your one concern:

“It’s still my mission, no worries about fighting and stuff. I will protect you!”

You rolled your eyes again, you weren’t a meek damsel in distress, you fought demons just the same. You probably wouldn’t even have minded helping out with the actual mission part. But you also knew just how stubborn Tengen could get, and if it was a mission that he’d easily do by himself, he wouldn’t let you unnecessarily endanger yourself just to help.

You were quiet for a little bit, pretending to mull it over. Your decision was already made, but you didn’t want to seem too eager. It became increasingly hard to say no to the sparkles in his eyes and his wide toothy grin.

“Sure. I’ll be your wife for the weekend. But you better spoil me.”

“Of course. I have never disappointed a woman!”

He laughed loudly, and you couldn’t help but feel a little jolt of electricity coursing through your body. Were you really that excited?

Tengen hadn’t lied about the resort being luxurious. Sure, it was in the middle of nowhere, and sure, there were barely any people around, and sure, you knew that the forests surrounding you were crawling with demons the second the sun went under… but it was beautiful, and it was clear the clientele was a of a way higher standing than the people you usually mingled with. You felt a little out of place even, and you were surprised to see just how relaxed Tengen was, how well he blended in. It made more and more sense that he had been selected for this mission.

You had been briefed on the details of the mission, but Tengens expectations of you were clear: just enjoy the weekend and be his loyal and loving wife for two days. You weren’t expected to fight or do any recon, but he would keep you updated on all the information he found, and you would just keep an eye out, the way you always do, even off-duty.

Other than that, some boundaries were established: you were to fake being husband and wife, but there was no reason for unnecessary PDA. Everything was cleared with his wives as well, and you had to admit you really appreciated his consideration and consent. The way he went over all kinds of scenarios beforehand to gauge just what you would be okay with had made you feel some type of way. It had also made you realize that you were okay with a lot of things, way more than you would expect yourself to agree to. A small voice in the back of your head kept saying: ‘If it is him, I suppose it would be okay’, which made you wonder just why you were so willing to receive affection from him, faked or otherwise.

Checking in with him having wrapped an arm around your waist made you feel more safe than you thought it would. You were strong and could fend for yourself, but that always had made past partners feel like they had to treat you like someone who was fiercely independent, someone who didn’t need as much pampering as you sometimes craved. It was nice to not even have to ask for that, feel safe and protected without feeling like he was looking down on you. He acknowledged your strength, it was just not your time right now to be strong. It was time to relax, and let him take care of you, and most of that was conveyed through simple gestures as you finished check-in and got settled in your room.

He carried your bags, held your hand or had an arm wrapped around your shoulder and opened doors for you. The way he so effortlessly fell into the role of your husband made it easier for you to take on your role as wife as well. You leaned into his touches, and you didn’t even have to fake the smile that was on your lips most of the day. You had to remind yourself to sometimes still roll his eyes and deliver a playful slap to his bicep, especially when it was just the two of you and there was no reason to keep up the act.

“It’s easier to just stay in the role”, you explained your behavior to him when he shot you a curious look after closing the door behind the two of you, “That way if someone walks in on us unexpectedly, there is no scrambling to get back into it.”

He nodded in agreement, but you didn’t fail to notice the glimmer in his eyes as he did so, slightly smiling. Did he notice something was off? Probably. But even if he did, he didn’t mention or ask anything, and you were glad he didn’t: you weren’t sure if you could tell exactly what was going on either.

Tengen was gone for a big part of the afternoon, doing recon and mission prep.

“Nothing for you to worry your pretty head about,” he had said with a grin, and he had left with a promise to come join you at the pool whenever he was done. You were allowed to spend the afternoon as you wanted, so you had grabbed a book, and found a nice spot by the pool. You settled in with a drink and a fruit platter, enjoying the sun on your face and an occasional swim to cool down before letting yourself get carried away into the fantasy world of your book again.

“Yo~ Looks like you’re having a good time even without me here?”

You were startled by Tengen’s sudden appearance, standing next to your chair. You remembered your role swiftly though, looking up at him with a smile.

“Oh you’re back, dea-”

You interrupted yourself, blinking a couple of times, finding yourself flustered and a little shocked by the sight in front of you. Tengen had changed into swimwear too, which made sense considering the environment, but for some reason you hadn’t expected to come face to face with his abs when you looked up from your book. His usual tight clothes left not that much to the imagination, but his tight swimwear took away what little fantasy you still had left. You couldn’t stop your eyes from wandering just a little, from his chest to his abs to his muscled thighs, a part usually hidden by his baggy pants, back up to whatever tiny scrap of fabric was hiding the essentials. You felt your face heat up, and opened your mouth a few times to finish your sentence, but you couldn’t, momentarily stunned into silence. It felt like hours before he moved, a few beautiful, wonderful hours, but in reality it must’ve been only a few seconds if it was even that long at all.

He just chuckled, crouching down by your side to hand you another drink, kissing your cheek, seamlessly picking up the conversation.

“I’m sorry for taking so long, I know I promised I’d only take a small nap”

You swallowed, taking the drink, the cold glass helping you return to your senses, playfully smacking his arm.

“And then you fell asleep and I had to escape your loud snoring, as always.”

There you go, you were right back into your role. He laughed in response, taking the chair next to you. You sipped some of your drink, regaining your focus and calming your senses. You were taken off guard by your own reaction to Tengen. This was all just a little play you were putting on for the sake of the mission, right? And as his wife, you definitely shouldn’t be having such an extreme reaction to seeing him like that. And yet.

You had expected Tengen to leave you the minute the sun went under, but he had surprised you by saying he’d have dinner together with you -better to keep up his cover. You’d go early enough so he wouldn’t miss out on too much of the evening, but long enough to actually lure out the demons and carry out the mission swiftly.

You were pleasantly surprised by the idea. After spending all afternoon at the pool you had expected that was as far as the act would go for today. After all, you had swum together, sat together in the pool, a strong arm around you as you found yourself trying not to focus of the feeling of his body pleasantly pressed into yours, and talked a little about your book. You found yourself really enjoying his company -way more than you expected when you had agreed to this mission-, and getting to extend this quality time, whatever the nature of it, was an enjoyable add-on.

You went back to get changed, and had to do another double take when Tengen appeared in a hibiscus violet kimono, perfectly complimenting his eyes. His hair was loose, waves still damp from your earlier activities, and framed his face perfectly. He smiled at you in your kimono, complimenting you on your looks.

“You look absolutely gorgeous tonight, my wife.”

He added extra emphasis on those last two words, in a way that was barely noticeable for anyone listening along -even though you were alone in your room. Besides that little inside joke, his words sounded genuine. You chuckled in response, waving his compliment away with your hand and shaking your head. You weren’t sure how you were feeling about your body reacting to his words, but you hoped the butterflies that had come to settle in your stomach would quiet down, so you could enjoy the food.

During dinner Tengen was a perfect gentleman again: holding your hand all the way till the restaurant part of the resort, only letting go to open doors for you and taking out your chair. The food was exquisite, dishes you had never had the opportunity to taste before, every single one tasting heavenly.

You were mostly surprised by how easily you were making conversation. Initially, you feared it’d be a bit of a hassle, considering you had to pretend to be married, and there was no way you could talk about work to not break your cover. You had started just talking about how you liked the resort, the food and then the conversation had switched to old memories, and through them you got to know each other a little better. The conversation felt intimate, sharing memories you normally wouldn’t share with just a coworker, just a casual friend. But the stories proved to be the best possible way for you to pass the time without being off topic or suspicious, and since all the stories were true, you didn’t even have to lie to make them believable.

Tengen listened to you intently as you talked, laughing loudly whenever you added a funny remark, and whenever he did so, you felt the butterflies fluttering in your chest. By now you were painfully aware of your predicament, but there was very little you could say about it in the moment without blowing your cover. Besides, you had to keep in mind that this was just for the mission. After this weekend you would go back to being coworkers, friends maybe, but nothing much more than that. It would be improper.

You weren’t sure if Tengen was this good an actor, or if he was genuinely having the conversation you were having. You only knew that he seemed a little startled when he noticed just how dark it had gotten already, and seemed a little out of it when he announced that it may be for the best for you to retreat to your room. The way he winked at you when he said that made your heart skip a beat, even though you rationally knew it was merely an excuse again for anyone who could possibly overhear. Yet, you couldn’t help but feel like he was a little disappointed to cut your date short as well.

You woke up in the middle of the night, confused and disoriented for a few seconds before you remembered where you were. You weren’t sure how late it was, but there was still no trace of the sun coming up in the distance, so you couldn’t have slept for that long yet. Tengen had gone off to do the mission work right after dropping you off at the room, sneakily escaping through the window, and you had decided to go to sleep not that long after. You asked him multiple times if he needed or wanted any help, and he had assured you just as many times that he would be perfectly fine.

Staying behind like that, while you had agreed upon it initially, worked against all your instincts: you knew you could be useful out there. It was hard not to worry. Tengen had shared some details on the mission, but had kept you in the dark for most of it, mentioning that with too many details you might come after him or try to help even though your only job today was to relax. During the day, that was not a very hard task to accomplish, but by night, especially when you were all alone here in your room, it became so much harder to ignore your very nature as a demon slayer. Especially knowing Tengen was out there risking his life. No matter how strong anyone was, there would always be a risk when you go out.

There was very little you could do right now though. You had no idea of Tengen’s game plan, nor did you know his exact location. If you went out now, you would only endanger yourself and possibly risk the entire plan failing. You knew when to stay put, so you did, but that didn’t mean it was an easy move.

It didn’t help that you were wide awake now, too overwhelmed by a mixed bag of emotions, too many of them to sort out. You were feeling antsy, muscles itching to do something, anything. You couldn’t help but feel a little worried too, listening to the quiet outside for any noises that might give away what was going on outside. But the only noises greeting you back were those of nocturnal woodland critters.

And then there were the…other feelings, by lack of a better term. You had been feeling some type of way towards Tengen today, and while you could probably define them more precisely, you weren’t sure if you actually wanted to. After all, no matter how open minded he was, it felt a little wrong to develop a crush on your coworker. Especially since he was happily married. Thrice.

Yet you couldn’t deny the spots where he had touched and held you today under the guise of your fake relationship were feeling a little warmer, a pleasant warmness that made you feel a little safer, even now he wasn’t around.

You could deny any less that the image of him in his swimwear by the pool was burned into your retinas, the mere idea making your face heat up just a little.

Your main concern now was for him to get back safely. After that you would figure out what to do with all the feelings stirring inside you. Maybe you would address them, talk to him about it. But just as well, you’d suppress them, waiting for them to eb away as you spent less time together. Most missions were solo anyway.

You looked out the window, the sky in the distance faintly changing colors from an inky black to a deep blueish purple. It wouldn't be long before those transitioned to purples, pinks and reds as the sun came up. It was later than you expected it to be, and you had hoped that Tengen would wrap up before sunrise. Either way, the mission would be paused or -hopefully- be finished when the morning started. You very consciously left out the third option: the mission had failed, and you were waiting for someone who wouldn’t return.

You felt safe, you felt warm.

There was a certain serenity that came with your current state: unbothered, ready to conquer the world. You woke up to the warmness of the sun on your face, and you had to blink a couple of times before your eyes got adjusted to the brightness of the light. Why was it light?

You jolted up, suddenly realizing you must’ve fallen asleep again. The sudden movement caused Tengen to groan in pain. Tengen. He was back.

It took you a few seconds to puzzle everything together. It was definitely day now, almost noon, judging by the position of the sun, and the brightness with which it shone. You hadn’t noticed Tengen coming back, at least not consciously so, but he was back. He was back and he was alive. A wave of relief washed over you, only to be quickly replaced with embarrassment, as you realized just how you were laying. Your futon a few yards away, your body resting half on top of Tengen’s instead; his groan had been a reaction to your elbow punching his ribcage as you got up a little too fast. He still had an arm loosely wrapped around your waist, and you had finally gained enough clarity to notice some dried up blood on his skin.

You sat up completely, more carefully now, looking over at Tengen. His eyes were still closed, but he seemed awake enough. His face was contorted into a slightly pained expression, and you noticed now that he was covered in bruises and small cuts. No injury bad enough to worry you, but still, enough of them for you to feel guilty. You really should have insisted on coming with him.

You got up to gather your medical supplies, noticing they were out and about already. Grabbing some gauze, water, a clean towel and disinfectant, you sat down next to him and started cleaning off the dried blood, disinfecting cuts and scrapes where necessary. This did wake Tengen up fully, and he sat up just a little with another groan. He didn’t stop you from your work, instead silently removed his shirt so you had better access and a better overview.

This time your reaction to his naked torso was different: you gasped when you noticed some nasty wounds, things an experienced Hashira like him shouldn’t have if the mission was as routine as he had made it out to be. Any and all admiration for his physique was immediately replaced by worry, and you immediately got to taking care of the wounds as much as you could.

It was silent for a bit as you worked, Tengen not reacting at all, except for muscles sometimes twitching as you touched him. You were the first to speak up, as you were almost done taking care of him, smoothing over a bandage with gentle motions.

“What happened last night?”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. You didn’t say a word, kept your face neutral. You gave him the time and space he needed to come up with an explanation. How the demon wasn’t entirely like his recon had made him think it was. How his traps had been avoided, and how the battle was a hard fought one. He did finish the job -of course- but it hadn’t been as flashily as he had hoped, and moreso, he had taken a while to get back to the resort, the demon nearly getting away as he ran further and further away from the resort when it became clear that the battle was lost.

“When I came back here, the sun was almost up again, and I found you resting with your head on the windowsill, as if you had fallen asleep looking out, waiting for me. I will admit that made me feel guilty, maybe I should have asked you to come along after all.”

You nodded, agreeing with his words, but you knew why he had made the decisions he did. He was safe, and that was all that matters, you weren’t sure if you could handle the loss of another friend. The fact that he made you worried paled in comparison to the more joyful one that he was safe, not as hurt as he could have been and made his way back to you eventually.

“I think I woke you up a little by climbing back into the room, but you weren’t fully awake.” He chuckled now, his tone way more lighthearted than when he was telling you the details of his fight.

“You mumbled my name, and when I went to move you to your futon, you clinged onto me so hard that I didn’t get to put you down without moving you. Hence our position when you woke up earlier.”

You smiled sheepishly, apologizing for your sleeping self, feeling a little flustered at the way you must’ve acted. Tengen didn’t seem too bothered by it though, if anything he seemed amused.

“It’s okay. Very flattering to have you clinging to me like a little koala bear.”

“If you weren’t injured, I’d smack you right now.”

He just laughed in response, and the sound reawakened the butterflies. You felt the heat creep up your neck, towards your ears, and you decided to hide your state by cleaning up your supplies and already repacking your bag. You’d be going home today, after all, and maybe for the best. You weren’t sure just how much longer you could last in his presence.

The decision to go home early came pretty easy. It would be a hassle to explain how your ‘husband’ got hurt during the night, and it would be even harder to avoid stares or questions as you spent more time in the resort, especially if you would spend more time at the pool.

You insisted that Tengen get his injuries checked out properly as well, even though he was adamant that he’d be fine. You were just a little worried, and you were by no means a healer, you didn’t want him to scar unnecessarily.

The trip back was quiet for the most part, a comfortable silence, mostly broken by Tengen asking questions or talking away. Hard for a sound hashira to stay completely silent the whole way, it didn’t match his personality either. You were too caught up in your own head to truly participate in the conversations, though, and you were sure Tengen at least noticed as much.

When the time came to part ways, you lingered just a little too long, pretending to just double check your possessions. Tengen lingered too, waiting nearby, when you finally realized what he was probably waiting for.

“Here you go”, you held out your hand, returning the jewelry he had given you to match his for the mission, a little extra detail to make you more officially like husband and wife. You had played with one of the rings on the way back, twisting it around your finger a couple of times, trying to stop your mind from imagining what it would be like wearing the jewelry in earnest.

He looked confused for a second -was it not what he was waiting for? and then shook his head.

“Oh no, you can keep those. Think of them as a token of my appreciation, and a fun memory of our relationship, which lasted the full two days”, he said with a wink, making your brain a jumbled mess again with just two sentences.

“If you insist”, you managed to squeak out, and you carefully tucked the jewelry away again, slipping one of the rings around your middle finger, pleased with the way it looked. It also helped you steer your focus away from Tengen, who was still standing very close to you, and you were hoping he’d step back before you’d have to make eye contact again. He didn’t though. Instead, you felt his hand carefully cup your jaw, tilting your face just as carefully, so you could no longer stare at your fingers. His thumb caressed your cheek, and you were sure he must feel the heat radiating from your face, enough to burn that hand. Even if he noticed, he didn’t show, instead just smiling at you.

“Thank you for being my wife for two days. It really was an honor to have you by my side for a little while, and you did actually help a lot, this mission.”

You shrugged in response, painfully aware that you’d be unable to form long intricate sentences as long as he was touching you like that, looking at you like that, standing close to you like that.

“It was just a little m-mission. I barely did anything.”

He chuckled.

“No, I think you did plenty.”

He leaned down, kissing your cheek to kiss you goodbye, missing your lips by an inch, and you felt your legs almost give way as your knees buckled.

“whaoh; didn’t think such a small and unflashy gesture would have such an effect on you?” He smirked, his tone teasing. Oh, he was fully aware of what had been happening, and you just walked right into his trap.

“I- you-” You took a deep breath, not wanting to stutter your way through an explanation. You weren’t even sure what you were trying to explain. How would you even tell him that-

“Don’t you worry, I know what’s been going on. This mission may or may not have been a little push, and my wives may or may not have been in the know. I am not saying that Hina came up with the idea, but I am saying she may have been involved even more than the two others.”

He smiled while you were trying to process his words, a task too big for your brain to manage, as his lips had left you unable to properly think.

“How about I invite you over sometime soon, hm? A proper date, no pretenses. See how it goes?”

You couldn’t do anything but just nod, still processing what was going on. He smirked; that very handsome smirk again and leaned down once more to leave the shortest and softest kiss on your lips.

“I’ll contact you soon then.”

#tengen x reader #tengen uzui x reader #kny #demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer tengen #demon slayer x reader #demon slayer reader insert #female reader #tengen uzui #fluff #humor #angst #exchange fic

212 notes · View notes

justheblueberry · 10 months

Text

handbinding of A Study in Scarlette by kittebasu

There are people who want to live forever, and then there is Shinichi, who just wants to live a little longer than this.

this bind has been in my head since i first read the fic like, three years ago. i dreamed up so many ideas for it, for so long, and now it's finally done! the typeset was actually done in early 2022, back when i was still using google docs, but it went through a few iterations because i was just. so. fiddly. with every aspect of this book. it needed to be perfect (as close to perfect as i, an amateur bookbinder out of my depth, can get) and it had to be absolutely over the top, to reflect the insane amount of love and care that the author put into the fic itself.

the first time i read this fic, i barely knew what detective conan was, much less all of the intricate plot details; i was just along for the ride, but by the end i was completely invested. i went back and watched through the anime as well as a few movies (it took me six months) and then read the fic again. and then a few more times. kaishin and the world of dcmk has utterly gripped me. it's 100% this fic's fault and i love it so, so, much.

i went through a few iterations of visual designs and i'm really happy with the little details i managed to squeeze in.

the entire color scheme is based around red, because 1) it's a murder mystery, 2) for scarlette shinamoto (and the title of the fic as well as the original holmes novel it references), and 3) the irony of "lady red" actually being red. the secret fourth reason is that i think red/gold is a super sexy color combo.

i sewed the textblock with red thread to reference holmes' "scarlet thread of murder".

another detail i love is the five yen coin bookmark, it was one of my first ideas and it turned out even better than i thought.

i wanted the endpapers to evoke a sense of the white marbled floor of the ballroom, with the glow-in-the-dark kaitou kid caricature being the luminol on the floor, and the little pops of red looks like blood that's been mixed in. i lucked out in that the other side of the endpaper was like a lavender-purpley color, i like to think of it as a little wink wink nudge to the color of the actual Lady Red.

the chapter pages got a few reworkings, but i'm happy with the illustrations i ended up doing for each of them. the chapter titles are one of my favorite things about the fic, each one has so much meaning packed into it and flows so beautifully, and i wanted to put as much care into making them pop as possible.

the cover was a linocut carving i designed and carved, which i then printed onto the bookcloth, and ironed on htv on top.

i also threw in a couple of my drawings of my favorite scenes.

this is getting way too long, so i'll end it here. i'll have a separate post detailing the process every step of the way, if anyone wants to take a closer look. this fic is kind of directly responsible for getting me into fanbinding, so it's safe to say it altered the course of my life. i now spend way too much time (and money) looking at book stuff.

kittebasu, if, somehow, you see this and would like an author copy, i would be honored to make one and ship it to you; i would be overjoyed to gift you with any art i have the ability to make, because the fics you wrote have irreversibly altered my brain chemistry, and being able to give back in any capacity would be a dream. (thank you.)

a few postscripts:

i am not selling any copies of this fic. partially because i believe in the gift economy of fandom as well as firmly keeping fanbinding a hobby that will stay unmonetized, but also because it took me months (years, if we are counting when i first finished the typeset) to finish this and i do not have the strength.

however, if you are also a fan of this fic and would like a copy, i honestly, fervently, encourage you to give fanbinding a try! renegade publishing and its discord server are an absolutely wonderful and free resource. i knew nothing about bookbinding and had zero materials when i first started, but i've learned so much thanks to the lovely people there. if you're still apprehensive about getting started, i'd be willing to share my typeset of this fic as well as answer any questions about the making of this book if you DM me.

473 notes · View notes

genderfluid-culture-iss · 8 months

Note

for the baby genderfluid tips!!

this could just be me lmao, but DO NOT donate your fem clothes if you feel masc for longer than usual. or vice versa.

keeping a gender journal is something that can be really helpful to actually look back on and see how it changes (and also have proof of fluidity for when you begin to think "hmm actually im just a trans girl. nothing else." no, you probably aren't. you felt completely boy/nonbinary/etc just a month ago, and thats okay.)

basically it can be really hard to embrace that your gender is not static, especially if your gender stays stable for a slightly longer period. it took me so long to stop rotating between "im a girl always" "no, im a boy always" "actually, im nonbinary always" to just admit im genderfluid.

also, make genderfluid content. you don't have to show it to anyone, but sometimes it can really help to make poetry or art or write a story about being fluid and your experience in particular. i have an easy avenue for this since i write fanfiction (haven't published any of it yet lmao) and i just hit my favorite characters with my genderfluid beam and go nuts

follow people who are genderfluid, read genderfluid books, maybe join a genderfluid discord server (there are barely any, so actually maybe make one), try to make genderfluid friends. you are not alone, even though it sometimes feels that way.

if you have plushies or anything similar, make them genderfluid. i have a genderfluid squishmallow who i use she/they pronouns for, and a little husky that switches between he/she. idk it just helps sometimes lol

some of us change gender daily, or multiple times a day. some of us change gender only a couple times a year, or even less. we're all different and that's fine.

tips for presentation:

if you have a day when you can't figure out gender, go neutral clothing-wise

take little things to ease dysphoria if you switch when you're out somewhere (ex. lipgloss, eyeliner, leather bracelet, etc)

if you can, get pronoun pins. seriously, get pronoun pins (or a colored bracelet for subtlety or if you're not out). you can wear multiple at a time, you can switch them whenever you need to. you aren't a burden if your pronouns change. you don't have to stick to they/them to be easy for people.

if you can, get a versatile hairstyle that you can make suit your gender no matter what. if you cant, try to get a hairstyle that makes you the least dysphoric overall.

if you are organized enough, separate your clothes based on gender/what you feel comfy wearing on different days. do not pressure yourself to fit stereotypes. some people can only feel comfortable in skirts when theyre boys, so they only wear skirts on boy days. do what works for you.

it's kinda complicated, but if you can expand your vocal range to sound more fem or masc depending on how you feel, it can help. alternatively, vocal train to make it more androgynous.

keep makeup wipes with you in case you need to take it off part way through being out. basically, make it as easy as possible to be able to change/tweak your presentation if necessary.

this could just be me, but having lots of hoodies in different colors and styles will save your life

sometimes you might have "blender days", which is what i call it when your gender feels like its in a blender in a bad way and you can't tell at all what it is, everything feels wrong, it's changing like every 10 minutes, etc. tbh on these days all i can do is put on sweats and a hoodie and feel dysphoric. listen to music if it helps. do a hobby.

non-clothing items can help a lot. a blue tshirt and jeans can be whatever you want it to be based on what you wear it with. (ex. sneakers/ballet flats, leather bracelet/sparkly necklace, baseball cap/eyeliner)

and lastly: YOU ARE AMAZING. keep being you, keep being incredible, and know that being genderfluid is a gift. be proud to be who you are, have fun, know that you are unique and special and wonderful!! we're ever-changing, and that's awesome. you are precious. i love you.

🩷🤍💜🖤💙

dont wanna link my tumblr, but my name is kiley if you want to attach a name to this!

Okay this is a lot more than I was expecting LMAO /pos

Thank you so much for this Kiley <33 I’ll start working on a masterpost with links to all this.

#genderfluid #genderfluid culture is #genderfluid culture #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq+#anon #anonymous #Genderfluid tips #Baby genderfluid tips #Genderfluid help

346 notes · View notes

catinasink · 3 months

Text

greetings from the sink

am i in post limit jail? nope :3

posting less due to school 👍

most recent edit: 9/21/24

im the one and only cat btw. if you even care.

also im the ultimate faggot btw

im not a vampire im notttt im notttttttt

main shit

minor. (my birthday is november 8 :3c )

i go by cat and nico and pluto and neptune and siffrin and calypso mainly and you can call me any of those (more about that here)

it/any/ask :3c

my labels arent any of your business blast. polyam + aspec + queer if you really need to know

dont call me your friend + no /p tonetag (im aplatonic :] )

no chain asks + no tag games + no donation asks please.

uhh no real dni? just no porn blogs follow me pls im a minor 👍

what youll find here: reblogging. og posts. gayposts. ventposts (tagged #neptune is complaining again or #delete later). lyricposts. fandom posts.

i spam reblog a lot. like a lot. do keep this in mind

i have two cats, kim and shego (or floorshitter); a sister (she/her); and the irls (in real life people i know; i tend to use irl as a term to describe the people i am close to irl) i mention most are pb / pissboy (he/him), cherry (they/any), and eve (she/her)

pst timezone (usually)

scorpio sun saggitarius moon scorpio rising . ok yeah thats a fucking Lie the constellations have shifted but i cba to check again lol

i speak english + russian, learning german + hebrew + ukranian

couple sideblogs, including @nymph-of-the-sea (rp blog for calypso from pjo) (no i never use it); @catinabath (for when im on post limit); two gimmick blogs; i definitely dont own @totallynotcatinasink; as well as @forehead-kiss-mutual-kill-polls :] a few others but ill keep those secret 💥

matching descs w @shrimpysstuff (shrimpy !!!) and banners w @homoashell (starr !!!)

i have four very lovely qpps mwah mwah <3 also a very dear spouse <3

i have an ao3 if that matters :]

discord server link :3 preferably join if youre around the age of a minor so everyone feels comfortable

literally just a cat in a sink btw

fandoms im in / rb from

warrior cats. i love em

will wood. hes so silly . is this a fandom idk

genshin impact. grhghrhgr

pjo. whoag

isat. save me isat

object shows. i like object shows

danganronpa. uhmmm yeah haha dont look at me