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#but they are also 15 and 15 year olds will say whatever comes to mind whether its well formulated or not
poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 year
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This is the start of something new
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drefear · 8 months
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Imagine reader artist, who loves to draw Miguel. And the other day she's just drawing naked Miguel's body. He saw it and just smirks and say: "I've got bigger than that" or "I could show/pose for accuracy"
TW: raunchy smut, Dom!miguel, fem reader, smut with no plot.
A/N: I wrote half of this while at work and a little drunk. So here ya go. Also currently in the process of writing a part two.
Miguel’s face filled your sketchbook, his back in his spider suit, his mask, every angle you could find him at. You often sat in his office for hours while he did reports, sketching him and drawing him. You loved using different mediums and colors, giving him new features and styles. You specifically loved practicing drawing his broad body and sculpted as-
Ahem. Legs.
Yes, ok, fine, you had a small crush on your boss, whatever, no big deal.
You would purposefully finish all of your work as fast as possible so you could sit back and draw him. And because you weren’t loud or annoying, and everything was always done on time and orderly, he let you.
But one mission in particular made him stressed out, and as you watched him filling out data about the anomaly he’d just captured, he glitched his suit down his torso and injected himself with that mysterious green liquid, entrancing you for those glorious few seconds.
It was very obvious he had a nice body, duh. But you never let your mind go too far in imagining him out of his suit, scared to go into a territory you couldn’t back out of.
And now you did, drawing his torso and pecks, shading his abs, and this got you curious about more.
Lower.
Biting your lip, you sat in the cafeteria a few days later. You purposefully sat with your back to a wall, making sure no one could sneak up on you and see what you were drawing, as you drew him laying down. His arms splayed behind his head, face relaxed, as you defined his leg muscles. As you finished the piece of art, the only area you’d avoided was his groin.
And now you stared at the empty area of art, knee bouncing from anxiety about how you were supposed to draw this. You had no reference for him. Yes, you’d seen dicks before, obviously. You lived in a universe with unrestricted internet access, so it’s not like you’d never been around the block, but here you were, blushing like a 15 year old just because of a dick.
Drawing and then erasing and drawing, you repeated the process a few times before you heard someone click their tongue in front of you. You’d been so consumed by what you were doing, you didn’t even feel your spider senses or hear them come close.
Miguel stood with an eyebrow raised and his hands on his hips, eyeing you curiously. “Why are you so jumpy?” He asked and you snatched the book in front of you to your chest, stuttering some bullshit answer about too much caffeine. He just nodded and continued giving you a new order.
You got up from your seat and moved to follow him to his cold, dark lair area. As you were about to step onto his platform, you tripped and your hands flew out to stabilize your fall. As you did, the notebook flew across the floor and slid as your vision blurred from how fast you’d collapsed, getting up slowly and rolling your shoulders. You reached to where the sketch book had fallen, but it was no longer there.
No.
NO.
It was between his fingers, as he flipped through the pages slowly, eyeing your work with his brows furrowed, focused. You jumped towards him and he just turned his back, making you feel like you ran into a wall. You reached around him and he webbed your wrist to the table beside you, still not tearing his eyes from your work.
“Stop, that’s private! Give it back!” You shouted and he rolled his eyes briefly.
“It’s all drawings of me, I think I’m allowed to see-“ and his words stopped as he flipped to the newest page.
The nude drawing of him.
You gulped as his expression became unreadable, stoic, and your eyes flashed between the art and him. “I-I was just practicing forms and poses-“
“It’s… inaccurate.” He spoke lowly before your eyes blinked for a moment, confused.
“What do you mean?”
He walked to you and stood tall, bending down slightly to stare directly into your eyes. His mouth turned up at the ends and his eyes glittered with something you’d never seen in him before.
Turning the book back to you and showing you your own drawing, he smirked deeper.
“I’m much bigger.” His eyes were almost challenging you, making your blood run ice cold, and you felt his hands yank your body against his. “Do you want to see for reference?”
And then his watch made a loud sound, Lyla popping up to explain some anomaly on earth number whatever. He groaned and turned to walk out. “I’ll be back once this is done. Don’t go anywhere because When I do return, we’re continuing where we left off.”
Then he was gone and you stood, mouth agape from the whole exchange. You thought it might take a while for him to capture this anomaly, so You’d decided to go back to your own universe in preparation, showering and fixing yourself up. You bit your nail nervously as you thought about it all. Was he serious? No way, right…?
As you stood in the bathroom mirror, the sound of a portal opening cut through your mind like a knife, making your body rush into your living room. You gripped the towel tight around your torso as you saw Miguel walk out of the colorful dimension behind him and into yours. The portal closed and with that, his mask disintegrated so you could see his face. A bit tired, he still had a less-than-enthusiastic expression on.
“I thought I told you not to go anywhere.” He repeated and you stood stuff as a board, now a bit scared. He took slow, calculated steps towards you as your head tilted back to continue watching him. “Inaccurate and disobedient. I have a lot to teach you, don’t I?” His index finger hooked under your chin as he smirked and grabbed your hand with his free one, pulling you into your bathroom. He looked around for a second before hitting a button on his watch and letting the fabric disappear.
You bit your lip as your eyes took full advantage of his exposed skin. “You- it-“
“Yeah. I know.” He grabbed your wrist and spun you around, bending you over your counter with your hand breached against your back. “Now I want you to really study how I fuck you, so that you get a good look at how big I am, and how easy I can maneuver this body.” He whispered into your damp hair and pushed down, then ripping the towel away and throwing it out of the bathroom completely.
His eyes stared down at your weeping cunt and he licked his lips. “I’ll be tasting you another time. Today, I want you to really feel my size.” He was cocky, and he had a right to be. His dick was huge, almost alarmingly big.
The tip of his cock pressed against your entrance and you clenched your jaw. “It’s gonna hurt, but I’ll go slow. That way you can feel good and still learn.” He cooed in a teasing tone and your eyes found his in the mirror, watching intently as he began to push into you. The sudden width he was stretching you to was mind numbing and your knees began to buckle, but he just held you up with one hand, the other still guiding himself into you.
“Coño, your sucking me in so nicely, might not even need to slow down.” He spoke and your eyes were rolling back from his words, to which you snapped out of once his hand that was holding you up held your face harshly towards the mirror. “No slacking, little girl. You better keep your eyes on my cock.”
Halfway inside, and you were already fluttering around him, on the verge of orgasm. “That’s it, sucia, cum on my cock. It’ll be the first time of many.” You shivered at his words, feeling him sink in further and immediately orgasming. The rolls of pleasure washing through you made him grunt as his hips couldn’t help but rut into you harshly. The lack of prep had you feeling everything he was giving you, hyper aware of your insides wrapping around him.
“Mm, wanna fuck me back? Grind back onto my cock? Paciencia, Nena.” He instructed as you kept trying to get him in further. Wrapping a hand around your torso, he tweeked at your nipples and made you gasp from the sensation. “That’s it,” he mumbled.
Finally, smirked, he chuckled darkly as you tried once more to thrust backwards. “Fine, you asked for it.” He met your eyes in the mirror, now blood red and swirling with the threat as he snapped his hips forward and forced the rest of him into you, making you gargle out a strained sound in shock and pleasure. The pain was beautiful, and began to subside quickly as you felt him twitch. He hit every spot and more, feeling new depths and points of pleasure.
Tears welled in the corners of your eyes as he started a slightly faster pace. Your body jiggled from the movements and the sound of skin slapping against skin filled your apartment, your mouth hanging open as your eyes never left were his dick was buried into you. He smiled, enjoying the way you watched his cock disappear into you over and over, and you felt the pressure building once more. How he bullied your cunt and grinned while doing it made you burst, tears breaking free and a scream ripping through you as your pussy squeezed him.
“Fuck, so tight.” He groaned, head now falling back and he kept going, beginning to chase his own high. Your mind had shut off now, fucked practically stupid on his cock and he rocking into you mercilessly. His speed was unmatched and he moved to pick up your hips to meet his, closing the gap your height difference had created, and finally having him slam into you until his hips met your ass, making you choke on your own oxygen from the absolute brutal beating he was giving your cervix.
He slid one hand to the back of your neck and pressed you further into the counter top of your sink, forcing your pert nipples to meet the cold marble and you cried out more, barely able to push back against him now as you were trapped between his body and your bathroom’s confinements with only your top toes touching the floor. Your face was streaked with tears as he grunted and let out ragged breaths.
“The perfect little pussy, so perfect for my cock. You can take it, little artist. You wanted to draw my cock so badly, now you have the perfect image to do it. Fucked deep inside of you. Draw us like this for me, yeah? I wanna see it everyday. Or should I just fuck you every day instead?” His words tumbled from his mouth like an avalanche and you could feel his cock about to burst, making you teeter over that cliff as well. “That’s it, strangle my cock. Cum all over me, niña, paint me with your cute cunt.” He demanded and you obliged, feeling a shooting electric sensation rip out of you. Suddenly, you were both a bit wet between the thighs and he was mesmerized by what he saw. Your juices squirt all over him and he came instantly after seeing that, pounding into you as far as he could and forcing his cum the deepest it could be inside of you.
Both of you were unmoving as you caught your breath, a layer of sweat covering you both as you stared at each other in the mirror. No words could describe what had just happened and Miguel smiled once more, which prompted you to ask.
“What?”
“You need to get a mirror by your bed. Because I want to do this to you every day.” He watched your eyes widen in the mirror in front of you both as he licked your neck from behind and sinking his fangs into your soft skin, jutting his hips once more and making you realize he was still hard.
“For art purposes.”
Part two is out!
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graychrissy · 3 months
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🌊Digital Detox + Egyptians lucid dreaming method 🌊
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Idk what to put on the title of this post so I wrote digital detox and I have copy pasted the main lines.
In the ancient Egypt the Egyptians use to have lucid dreaming alot and it was extremely easy for for them not just Egyptians but it was also mention ancient Indian scriptures.
You’re probably wondering ‘what’s the secret’? The real problem is often NOT your technique. It’s actually another issue that no amount of techniques, articles, reality checks, supplements or uncomfortable masks is going to fix. It’s your ‘inner game’. Specifically, your subconscious motivation and reward circuits, and ‘dopamine cycle’. Travel in your mind for a second, to ancient Egypt.
There were no smart phones, internet connections, computer animated action movies or virtual reality headsets.
Your brain back then would have produced a healthy amount of dopamine as a reward for pretty basic things like eating, working, exploring, and taking some time to relax or meditate
Now our average attention spans are literally less than 7 SECONDS. It’s probably a lot lower than that, and It’s declining every single year with the rise of new, highly addictive and stimulating social media apps and platforms. When was the last time you meditated for over 90 minutes? Have you ever? I’m not saying you have to do that to lucid dream, but this sort of practice was very common 5000 years ago. In fact, it was weird NOT to do that. And herein lies the main problem.
Your brain is ‘fried’ with an overly stimulated dopamine pathway. Dopamine is the neurotransmitter that stimulates the feeling of WANTING to keep doing something. It’s the reason you keep scrolling through Instagram, or keep refreshing your Facebook feed to see if there are any new comments or notifications. But it’s also the SUBCONSCIOUS reason you aren’t able to lucid dream easily. In the last decade especially, there have been billions of dollars spent by big tech to essentially ‘addict you’ to their platforms. Why? Money. The more time and energy you spend on platforms like that, the more money they make. So the task has been given to artificial intelligence. The AIs often just get trained and told a few basic things: 1: Get people to spend more time on the platform 2: Get people to keep coming BACK to the platform as often as possible The ‘AI’ pays almost NO attention to what that would do to your mental health, attention span, motivation, emotions, or really anything else. Much LESS attention is paid to the effect it has on your ability to focus, or do things like, say, lucid dream. Now, the ‘dopamine cycle’ is one part of the problem, but it’s actually pretty easy to fix. There are several little pieces to what I call the ‘modern brain puzzle’. Things that just weren’t a problem 5000 years ago. You can see some of this playing out in children today. On average, children or people under the age of 15, find it MUCH easier to lucid dream than adults do. It’s because at that age, their dopamine system has not been damaged too much. This is of course changing now, as more and more children are having access to smartphones, but it’s an interesting point. In fact not only does the dopamine problem affect your ability to lucid dream, it also affects your ability to WANT to lucid dream (consciously and subconsciously). Specifically I’m talking about your motivation and focus. And you guessed it, there’s your number one cause of problems when trying to meditate, practice techniques like the WILD, or recall your dreams.
After reading this paragraph or stanza whatever,I noticed something,as a kid I had lucid dreams alot with just putting intentions.
My first lucid dream was at around 7-8 years old,and I was sinking when I realised I was dream and I tried controlling my dream and even succeeded,and I was probably there for about 10 minutes playing with underwater creatures and mermaids.
And till 7 grade I use to have alot of lucid dreams but after that I was allowed to use phone and so I was always invested in phone like all the time. By the way lucid dream was pretty normal for me and I pretty much forgot about it and never really paid attention to lucid dreaming. And then I rarely had any lucid dreams, probably 4 times ever since 8 grade and I've noticed every time I lucid dream it's always whenever I don't use any social media.
In 9 grade my phone was taken again because my mother noticed my social media addiction. And after few months I again start to lucid dream for fun easily and effortlessly but during COVID I was again allowed to have my phone and then a new laptop so now my life was revolving around social media again and for the past few year I only lucid dream whenever I don't get to use my phone more then 2 days.
Idk bout y'all but I wasn't allowed to use phones or laptop till 8th grade so the only thing I knew was TV which I only watched after coming home so like my mind was most of the te bored because I didn't had anything to keep it entertain which made it easy for me to observe around looking for things to do.
So how can you reverse the ‘dopamine problem’ and several of the other issues modern life has created? By the way: This is NOT about destroying your phone and going back to live in a cave. There are actually several powerful habits you can install, that will let you KEEP using your phone, laptop etc, but without these harmful effects. Here’s the simple solution to more lucid dreams: 1. Reverse engineer your life and remove distractions, manipulation, ‘dopamine hijacking’ and harmful blue light exposure from your daily routine (along with some other ‘problem patterns’) 2. Get inside your subconscious brain and rewire yourself to WANT to practice lucid dreaming, and to effortlessly do reality checks at the right time, without even trying 3. Learn powerful ‘all day awareness’ and ‘lucid living’ techniques that give your brain superpowers in the fight 4. On top of THAT foundation, learn the most effective techniques and concepts, use our tools to stay motivated, and experience lucid mastery within 14 days. Let’s dive a little bit deeper: First, you have to ‘reverse engineer’ the problem. This can be complicated if you don’t know what you’re doing, but we’ve laid everything out step by step for you. If dopamine addiction is part of the problem, we have to break that addiction first. Then comes your mindset, and your motivation pathways. You need to actually feel GOOD when you practice these things. I see so many people saying they’re struggling to remember to do reality checks, or they just don’t want to wake up at ‘weird times’ to practice. Don’t worry, you won’t have to. It will feel good, and you’ll ENJOY practicing these things. Next, your subconscious mind. It’s SO important to fix your internal beliefs about lucid dreaming, because the chances are you have ‘internal blocks’ about becoming lucid. They’re easy to pick up, but a bit harder to ‘unlearn’. The system shows you how to ‘unlearn’ them, and install new, powerful and self affirming beliefs into your mind. This gives your brain lots more motivation to keep trying. Now, one of the most common things I hear people say is that they can’t REMEMBER to keep doing reality checks. It’s linked to the dopamine problem we mentioned earlier, but it’s also connected to a few other psychological principles that we’ll get onto. We’ll give you a new framework to ENJOY reality checks, remember them without any annoying reminders, and actually get them to SHOW UP in your dreams, 9 out of 10 times. And then finally, we’ll build the most effective techniques, methods and concepts on top of that new, strong foundation. Of course, I’m simplifying this here, but that’s the outline.
Here are some videos that may help.
youtube
youtube
If you want to know more about it or get the steps to lucid dream you can buy the book or go through a long step to get it for free but the procedure is very long and probably only for Iphone user.
You find some good articles ways to do the 'reverse dopamine' thingy.(I donot trust my research on this topic cuz I got confuse)
You may use Adambja's tape to reprogram your subconscious and this hacking the matrix tape the comments under the video was so good and I found this tape on someone's success story. You can use this two tapes to reprogram your subconscious and of course psych-k.
This is pretty much all you need digital detox,observing your surroundings and subconscious reprogramming to change your belief or assumptions.
And this will make you even more motivated that you are working on your goals as many of us have the access of devices it's hard for us to keep up with all this method and it's not like we are always busy if we are we wouldn't be scrolling through Tumblr and Pinterest all the time. If you read the the copy pasted part you'll see what I mean.
Edit: I forgot to mention it 🥲 if we follow do this we CAN HAVE lucid dream everyday.
Egyptians lucid dreaming tea
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This will be quick,so I went to my aunt's place with my mother and my aunt's ran out of tea powder/leaves so she used her daughter's blue lotus tea and after getting home I took a nap and I HAD A FOKING LUCID DREAM,so basically I didn't knew that it was the tea until I was doing some research on LD and found out that in ancient Egypt they use Blue Lotus tea and I found some review about it on YouTube and people had very vivid dreams aswell. This tea basically put you in REM which y'all probably know about.
But I don't like tea😐,so if anyone have interest you can try I honestly want to but my hate for tea is on top on the list of top 5 things I hate,you can find them online people even use Blue Lotus in vape😐not encourageling y'all to smoke but if anyone does you can.
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nerves-nebula · 10 months
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OK SO HUGE SPIDERVERSE 2 SPOILERS HERE i wanna discuss what themes i was picking up on and that i'm the most excited to see resolved
obviously theres FAMILY and PARENTING but i'm more interested in the themes presented with how The Spot developed and ALSO how that relates to miguel's whole situation
there is one main thing i wanna talk about tho:
inflexibility/the justification of cruelty
To me this is the core of the conflict behind both what happened with The Spot (my beloved) and whats going on with Miguel & the other spider-people's adherence to maintaining the status quo of their shitty shitty lives.
the inflexibility/justification of cruelty is obvious with miguel, it's like his whole thing. but I think it's less obvious with Miles. Miles cracks jokes to cope like a lot of spiders do, but his mockery of The Spot made things WAY worse. Like, here's this guy who tells you a harrowing story of how his life got ruined, and yea it's not entirely your fault but it's also not completely unrelated to you. He's completely alone, no one will hire him, he's a freak! And to top it all off, you won't even let him steal some money so that he can fucking live! whats he supposed to eat, miles?????? where's he supposed to LIVE.
and yea that's a lot to drop on a 15 year old but he's also a superhero (the age of which most people don't know) and the LEAST he could do, the BARE minimum imo, is take this guys pain seriously. even if he does look funny or weird, and he's not a huge threat at the moment.
I think we were supposed to relate to miles while he was fighting The Spot a the start, we saw the meeting with his parents and how bad he needed/wanted to just get the fight over with to stop disappointing them. But if you think about it from the spots perspective the whole thing wasn't just humiliating and frustrating- it cemented in his mind that spider-man was an uncaring and cruel person who didn't give a shit about him as long as he didn't disrupt the status quo of normal people or whatever.
but who cares, right? Miles does that all the time. that's just how things are, right? there's no need to change how he thinks about the lives of the people he fights so long as it doesn't affect him personally :/
And that's kind of what miguel does too. he's just more aware and active about it. he does things he'd rather not do, makes sure people suffer the way he thinks they have to because that's just how things are.
and both of those are probably not actually necessary! it's needlessly cruel to force spider-people to lose the ones they love, and it's needlessly cruel to mock and belittle a man who's had his life ruined to the point he needs to turn to crime just to survive.
I can't prove it yet cause the next movie hasn't come out yet, but I feel like it would be a bad idea for The Spot to die, I can accept him dying but only if they acknowledge that this isn't entirely just because The Spot is like, idk, evil or something. I want them to acknowledge the cruelty and pain that lead to this.
The same way it wouldn't make sense for Miles to end up agreeing with Miguel, it just doesn't match with the themes they've set up so far. Miguel is clearly coded to be in the wrong about what he thinks has to happen, and I suspect there's an aspect of his story/history that we aren't aware of. I can't say how or why but I think he's wrong about why the universe he went to fell apart (maybe he knows that, maybe not?) but I guess we'll have to see.
anyway can't wait for spider-man 3: even more fucking spiders!!!!
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brae-brae · 3 months
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RODRICK HEFFLEY X READER (fluff)
"He did that shit to me too..."
So TW to people. this contains mentions of SA, SH, and underage drinking.
Sorry if this is shit. I don't really post on Tumblr and I don't really know how to do this, so I'm just gonna put this on here- ALSO HEATHER IS NICE IN THIS ONE!!!!! (kind of)
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“A party? Oh, I don’t know…” I twirled my hair, something my mom said I do when nervous or deep in thought. Lily, my best friend, sighed on the other end. “Oh, come on! You haven’t been to a party in forever!” I gripped my hair at the thought of the last party I went to. “Yeah, you know why..” silence. After what felt like forever, she finally spoke. “Listen, I know last time wasn’t the best party experience ever..” I rolled my eyes. “Yea, being… well you know isn’t the best scenario… for anyone. Anywhere...” she breathed out. I rolled on my back looking at the ceiling. “Listen, you don’t have to go. I just thought you would want to get out of the house. You’ve been in there all summer!” I looked to my side, noticing my alarm clock. 9:17
After a little bit of debating, I finally responded. “Be at your place in 15.” her squeal was heard over the phone. “OKAY! LOVE YOU! I laughed at the response. “Love you too.”
______________________________________
I guess that’s how I got here. A house full of sweaty teens, completely intoxicated, dancing, whether on each other or with friends. Lily ran up to her boyfriend Ben, kissing him on the cheek, and engulfing him in a big hug. “Hey, Y/N, how have you been?” I shrugged my shoulders. “You know,” I put a finger gun in my mouth, before going back to my nonchalant self, “the usual.” he chuckled and put an arm around Lily. 
Lily looked behind me before looking back at me, smiling evilly. “Oh, heyyyyyyy Rodrick.” I quickly threw my head around to see Rodrick Heffley coming towards us with drinks in his hand. Handing me one smiling, before turning his attention to the other two. “Hey?” he said confused. I quickly drank the cup, hoping it was beer. I needed to calm my nerves. Thank god. Beer. 
We walked into the living room sitting on the couch. “So, it’s been a while,” Rodrick said smiling. I could feel my face heat up at his words. Looking down at my cup, I let out a nervous laugh. “Hehe, yea. Just been kinda cooped up lately. You know, listening to music and reading, boring shit.” I took a large drink from my cup, earning a laugh from him. “Yea, so how have you been?” he said putting his foot on his knee, putting an arm on the back of the couch. “Oh same old, same old. How about you? Heard y’all have been working on a new song?” he immediately perked up, his whole demeanor changing. 
He loved it when someone asked about his band or music. “Oh well actually-” he yamered on about his music and the song names they came up with so far. A lot of people find it annoying but I loved hearing him talk. Whether it’s about legos, the newest hyper fixation he was having, or whatever his mind could come across. I loved it. His voice brought me a sense of calm, which is surprising because he’s just as fast-talking as I am. I guess because I’ve known him for years, I kind of just got used to it, finding peace in it too. 
 After a long talk and about 4 cups later, I hopped off the couch, suddenly stumbling back. “I am,” I paused turning around to look at a giggling Lily, “Going to the kitchen.” I smiled and walked off, Lily saying something about me being fucked up. As I made my way to the kitchen, I bumped into someone. “Well, hello..” the dude smiled at me, “I’m Justin, and you are?” I smiled and got the last few drops out of my cup. “Y/N, I was just headed to the kitchen, care to join me?” I said with a smile. Eventually, we started to talk as we made our way to the kitchen. As he spoke, I couldn’t help but get bored by his presence. It was giving... toxic masculinity. I turned around to grab a pop, only to see Rodrick, in the dining room talking to Ben. 
I couldn’t help myself but stare.
The way he holds his cup, the way he moves his hands when he talks, the way he smiles, oh his smile. God, it was contagious. His smile followed by his laugh makes my face feel like a thousand suns, kinda makes my butt and outer thighs tingle, too. I caught myself looking at him for longer than I should have but I didn’t care. Justin’s voice slowly faded into the loud music. All my thoughts wandered to him. What was he laughing about? Did he like my outfit today? I wonder what he’s thinking about? Should I go talk to him?
“Hello? Earth to Y/N?” I saw Justin’s hand waving in front of my face. My head whipped around to look at him. “I’m sorry, what were you saying?” his arm dropped to his side, and the shit-eating grin that was on his face before was gone. Probably left a while ago. “I was just saying that this party is really fun and all, but would you wanna go somewhere… more private?” his hand came up to my arm and started to rub it. I looked down, honestly kinda uncomfortable. I looked up, trying to give him the best smile I could without seeming shocked. 
“Um, I  think I’d rather stay here..” I said pulling away from him. He quickly grabbed my shoulder when I tried to walk away, putting his hands on either side of me, blocking me from leaving. “What? Really? I sat here for 15 minutes talking while you just stared at who knows what. You could at least give me something in return.” his voice was dark and stern. It made my stomach churn in fear. He grabbed my hip, forcing me closer to him. I could smell the alcohol on his breath as his face got closer to mine. I could feel the color drain from my face. 
Shit.
No no no, I can’t move. Please god. I promised. I promised wouldn’t get into this situation again. Please god someone- “Hey! Y/N, right?” we both turned at the sound of a girl’s voice. Through my blurry vision, I could make out a blond girl wearing a pink tank top and low-rise jeans. She was really pretty. I nodded, finally. “Hey, so I need your help in the bathroom,” she looked at Justin, “Girl problems.” she smiled sweetly at him. She grabbed my hand leading me through the living room. Before we went behind the wall, I caught a glimpse of confused Rodrick.
 We made it upstairs to the bathroom, and when she closed the door, I immediately started to throw up. I didn’t know if it was the drinking or the fact I was scared shitless. She sat there rubbing my back, holding my hair. “Are you okay? God, I’m so sorry..” I looked up at her, smiling weakly. “God you’re pretty..” she giggled and sat on the bathtub. “Thank you, I get that a lot,” she said flicking her hair back. “I’m Heather by the way, Heather Hills,” she paused, sitting on the floor with me,
“Listen, I saw what Justin was doing, and I couldn’t just stand there and watch that asshole just feel you up, you know?” I nodded. I was shanking, no, trembling.
Then, I just started balling. Crying hunched over the toilet. thankful for the blaring music downstairs. “Hey, it’s okay. I know. He did that shit to me too. Normally, I would just laugh at a guy’s pathetic excuse to flirt with a hot girl and joke about it with my friends,” she laughed to herself, almost as if she were remembering her doing that. Then she stopped, looking at me in the eyes. “But I knew what he was planning, no fuck that, scheming. He did..” she looked at the door for a minute then continued after clearing her throat, “He did that to me, too. Back in freshmen year.” she looked at her hands in her lap, almost dazed. 
I sat up from the toilet and looked at her. I tried to find the right words, the best ones, to express myself without seeming like too much. But all I could say was, “Thank you.” she smiled at me, helping me up off the bathroom floor. We walked out of the bathroom, and I followed her back downstairs. As I turned off the last step, I bumped into someone. “Oh my shit, sorry..” I looked up at the idiot who had bumped into me, only to be met with dark brown eyes. My mouth instantly ran dry, however, that was the only dry thing on me… 
Just as he was about to speak, Heather interrupted. “Jesus Hefley, watch where you’re going..” she pulled me along with her to her friends. The rest of the night was kind of a blur. All I remember was dancing, laughing, and thinking about Rodrick. 
The next day, I woke up in my room, my head pounding. I look at my floor to see… 
“RODRICK??” he jumped up at the sound of my terrified voice. He kneeled on my bed. Grabbing my hands. “Hey, hey, you okay?” his eyes laced with concern. I shook my head and instantly regretted it. “Here, drink some water.” he handed me a water bottle, and I instantly began to chug it. Setting the empty bottle down on my nightstand, only for it to drop. 
Then it hit me. Like a fucking truck. “Um… this isn’t my room..” he let out a breathy laugh, shaking his head. “No, it is not. its mine." he paused, "What do you remember from last night?” he asked while sitting on, what I now know is, his bed. I thought, trying to remember. “Not really anything… wait, did we-” his hands shot up, shaking crazily. “NO NO NO! I wouldn’t ever think about that shit with you that fucked up!” I let out a relieved breath. “Okay. I just wanted to make sure.” he nodded. His eyes suddenly became very worried. “So last night, you were wasted, like I said before and so you threw up all over your shirt..” I looked down.
I wasn’t in my clothes… I was in a graphic teeshirt and some sweatpants, suddenly I realised.
___________________________
GETTING READY FOR THE PARTY
I walked over to my closet, going through my abundance of clothes. I grabbed my My Chemical Romance shirt and black leggings. As I started to get undressed, my arm stung as I pulled off my clothes. I looked down at my arm and saw the fresh marks I had left the previous night. I looked down at my shirt and thought to myself. “Shit, hmm.” I quickly switched out my shirt for a plain green hoodie. I looked at myself in the mirror and put on the best smile I could. “Well, ready as I’ll ever be…” I grabbed my bag and headed out of my room.
_______________________________
“How long?” my eyes shot up to meet his. i looked away. trying to find anything else to focus on. I brought my knees up to my chest and rested my head on them, taking a deep and shaky breath. When I finally looked at him again, I felt the tears prick in my eyes. “Since Jason Dean’s party…” I mumbled, choking slightly, "about 8 months ago."
I couldn’t stop them. The tears just kept coming. Rodrick just sat there, staring at the wall. After what felt like years, he finally spoke. “Can I hug you?” I didn’t respond. I just wrapped my arms around him burring my face in his shirt. He wasted no time in putting his arms around me, but he didn’t squeeze too tight, almost afraid to hurt me.
Eventually, I pulled away, looking at his snot-covered shirt. “Oh, sorry. Kinda just got my nose jizz on your shirt,” I said with a strained laugh. He looked down laughing. “Nose jizz? Dude-” We both burst out laughing. My eyes still have some tears falling. The one thing about our friendship is no matter how serious, jokes will always be okay. Just lightens the mood.
After we both calmed down, he held my hand, causing my face to burn. “Okay, but seriously,” he cleared his throat, trying to suppress his laugh, “does anyone else know?” he said, trying to continue the conversation. I shook my head. “Not even Lily?” I looked up at him, shaking my head again. He looked down, trying to find his next words. “Was it because of the incident?” my hands became clammy, and I felt like puking. “Yeah...” I said meekly. He let out a sigh. “Listen, I want to help you. In any way I can. Okay? I care so much about you and I don’t want you doing this to yourself. I want you to talk to me, that’s what I’m here for…” he held my face with his other hand making me look at him. I nodded. 
“Who changed me?” his face burned. “Well technically you did, but okay so-” he thought for a second, “so after most of the people left, Lily said that you should stay here, so I brought you upstairs and you puked all over yourself. So I went to grab some of my clothes and handed them to you, and you kinda just started like, stripping? Hehe..” my face burned, “I went downstairs and when I came back up a few minutes later, you were passed out in my bed. Then when I saw, um those..” he tried to make eye contact with me but failed miserably. 
I was still blushing at the fact that he saw me getting undressed. I mean he’s seen me in a bra before, but now I have boobs and stuff, so that made it a little more awkward. Then the question that I was wondering came out of my mouth before I could think. “Why did you sleep on the floor?” his eyes finally met mine. “Oh, uh I didn’t think you would be comfortable with me sleeping next to you, plus you already freaked out when I was on the floor so…” he said rubbing the back of his neck. I again spoke without thinking, “I wouldn’t have minded.” instantly regretted what I said, slapping a hand over my mouth. “Really?” his eyes lit up, slightly squeezing my hand tighter. I looked away from him, hoping he wouldn’t see my red face. 
God this boy has me whipped. 
“I mean, my back hurts from sleeping on the floor, would it be okay if I laid down here?” he asked hesitantly. I rolled my eyes grinning. “It’s your bed, you can do whatever you want.” he chuckled and laid down.
I gently laid down facing him, hands resting under my face. I quickly looked at his lips and back at his eyes. We sat there in silence, just looking at each other. Wait is he leaning in, wait! Am I leaning in? Just as I thought he was about to kiss me, he paused, “Y/N?” I looked up at him through my eyelashes. “Can I kiss you?” I smiled and nodded. “Use your words..,” he smirked. 
“Yes..”
WE LOVE CONSENT!! CONSENT IS SEXYYYYYY UHHHHHH
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RIP to my friend nixie. they stopped watching SPN after season 11. and asked about the finale. i wanted to immortalize what i sent (which includes a recap of seasons 12-15 so they would Understand.) so. read on if you wish, this monstrosity is going under the cut lol
so. in season 12 lucifer possesses the president of the united states (dont worry about it) & impregnates one of the president's staff members who was banging the president behind closed doors, republican Kelly Kline. through a series of events, cas winds up being the Adoptive Father. kid is born, but he had opened a rift to a different alternate universe the show so eloquently named 'apocalypse world'. it is a world where sam & dean were never born. through Another series of events, team free will PLUS mary winchester (yeah shes back from the dead, amara brought her back, dont worry about it lol) & cas tries to kill lucifer. he thinks he did, comes back through , and hes like there for .02 seconds before lucifer pops through & stabs cas. cas dies. mary beats up lucifer with angel brass knuckles or whatever & they fall through the rift & it closes. they are trapped there. at this exact moment, jack kline (kelly kline & lucifer/mr. president's baby) is being born. sam runs into the house to Check On That. dean however, falls to his knees next to cas's body & looks up desperately to the sky. (the cw said Not to read into this. it means Nothing. destiel who?!) also kelly died in child birth. bc spn Hates women.
thats the end of season 12.
season 13, we have jack. he popped out a fully fledged like. 19? 20? 21 year old?? bc his mom said he would have to Grow Up Fast. dean wraps cas's body in a curtain. alone. and is like crying & devastated. the bois and jack burn cas's body & dean looks like he wants to off himself (& he tries to in like. the next episode but Death brings him back). (also sorry im sooo bad at summary lol). we have the Widower Arc where dean bargains with a silent god to bring back cas, but Nothing. and dean is just fucking depressed as all shit. suddenly! cas is back!! BECAUSE jack heard dean yelling at sam about how its jacks fault cas is dead bc when jack was a fetus he showed cas a Vision of how he could bring Paradise On Earth if they allowed him to live (they wanted to kill him bc. like. Spawn Of Satan & all that). so jack uses his Powers™️ & brings cas back from the dead! yay!! a lot of other shit happens & the Empty (which is like. the Entity that encases all the angels & demons when they die, & where cas was when he was dead) Does Not Like that cas escaped. so, it wants to take jack to get back at cas. cas is like 'no fuck off thats my son lets make a deal. take me back instead' & the empty is like 'ok bitch 2 can play that game. i WILL take you. but ONLY when you experience a Moment Of True Happiness™️'. & cas is like 'bet.' bc! hes a depressed mf & figures it would take a Miracle to make him Truly Happy. (pls keep this in mind, its a surprise tool for later). ummm so yeah season 13.
season 14 had like. ANOTHER fucking michael/lucifer arc but it was Stupid. dean said yes to michael like the angels wanted in season fucking 4 & 5. & i dont Totally remember the plot but like. dean has michael trapped in a box in his mind & wants them to?? fucking?? put him in a warded coffin & chunk it in the ocean?? so michael will never hurt the world again?? also--its like. AU michael. and also mary is okay, & we get AU bobby & AU charlie & a lot of shit happens. anyway.
season 15: we get the Divorcr Arc™️!! dean & cas fight!! bc guess what? jack accidentally killed mary!! (yes! she died AGAIN!!) bc! he didnt know how to control his powers! & dean blames cas! so cas Leaves in a big dramatic breakup scene. we also find out that god (aka chuck) has been like. controlling Everything?? & free will Doesnt Exist?? & dean has a crisis & we get cas saying 'dean, you asked what about all of this is real. We Are.' (which we were apparently sooo crazy to read into!!) & also!? chuck brings back ALL the monsters salmon dean ever killed?? and rowena sacrifices herself to save the world! but! dont worry! she is now thenQueen Of Hell™️ & fucking THRIVING! anyway, season progresses, we get purgatory 2.0 and dean & cas are separated & dean lITERALLY GETS DOWN ON HIS OLD MAN KNEES TO PRAY TO CAS AND APOLOGIZE AND SAY HE FORGIVES HIM!! & then. a bit later. chuck starts poofing away Everyone On Earth bc he wants to destroy the multiverse. and also? death wants to kill dean i forget why. oh yeah! i think he stole her Death Book or whatever to try and see how to kill god. anyway. we have episode 15x18. Thee Episode of All Time. it starts with AU charlie and her gf. they are making eggs and vibing and all of a sudden her gf goes Poof. then sams gf Eileen goes Poof. so they round up as many friends as they can & put them in a warded place but they all go Poof. so sam is with the friends when this happens & also jack. and dean & cas have gone to the bunker to Fight Death. and. so. get ready for this. death shows up. she (yeah billie the reaper became death btw. long story) she starts to like. squeeze deans heart to kill him with magic. cas helps dean run through the bunker away from her. they get to the dungeon. death is literally banging on the door which cas had cut his palm to ward with a sigil of his blood with a knife he pulled from deans back pocket. (again: he cut his palm--another Surprise Tool For Later). deans like 'im so sorry man, we should have stayed with sam. shes gonna get in here, and shes gonna kill you, then shes gonna kill me' & cas is like 'well theres one thing strong enough to stop her' & he starts telling dean about the deal he made to save jack (yep, he never told him). and he says 'i always wondered what would break that curse. but i think i know now' & he. he fucking. he starts a speech about how he knows how dean sees himself, as a killer, a monster, daddys blunt instrument driven by anger, just like his enemies see him. BUT cas says dean is Not that. he says dean is 'the most caring man, the most loving man on earth' & deans like freaking out & is like 'why are you telling me all this? why does this sound like a goodbye??' & cas says, crying, but smiling, 'because it is' & then!! cas!! says !! 'i love you' !!!!!!!!! &&&&& death breaks down the door!! && the empty is materializing behind dean! & dean says 'dont do this cas!' & cas grabs deans LEFT SHOULDER WITH HIS BLOODY PALM! & says 'goodbye dean' & shoves him out of the way!! & the empty grabs cas!! && death!! & takes them away!!!!!! && dean is like!! freaking the fuck out sitting on the flooor with tears in his eyes!! && we cut to like. a bit later. hes Still there, crying, head in his hands, as his phone rings on the floor--its sam. end of the world, sam is calling, & he doesnt answer. we end the episode to deans crying. LIKE FUCK!!!!
15x19: they defeat god. jack like. absorbed him?? & he became god?? & then fucked off to do godly duties!? and did Not bring cas back????
(there are Theories that Chuck Won &thats why the next episode is so fucked and i Have To Agree)
15x20: okok. i fucking HATE THIS FUCKINGEPISDORNFMDNFNDNFNDBDND
anyway. so. cas is Not in the episode. at All. we have sam & dean? driving??? & there are like at LEAST 2 very Bad montages of random scenes that dont even make sense. sam & dean go to a pie eating festival. sam shoves pie in deans face. they Thengo on a case. its vampires. theres a vamp from like. season 2?? who was a minor charachter?? but they brought her back?? why??? idk. and. so. dean gets impaled on a rusty rebar nail during the fight scene in thr barn. he gives sam a long ass speech. they ?? touch foreheads for some reason??? && dean wont let sam get help??? & sam is like 'if cas were here...' & deans like 'yeah well he isnt.' like??? && then deAN FUCKING DIES??? && GOES TO HEAVEN??? && BOBBY IS THERE??? AND APPARENLY FUCKING ABUSIVE ASS JOHN LIVES DOWN THE ROAD??? && dean asks bobby 'so jack did all this?' (as in revamping heaven so people can be all together instead of separate like it used to be) & bobbys like 'well, cas helped' & then dean smiles, then goes?? & rides his car!?? bc his car is in heaven????? && we just see him driving interspersed with clips of sam on earth, burning deans body, and grieving dean, and later sam gets a blurry wife, we dont see who she is, and he has a son?? and he named him dean!? whixh we know bc the kid has on overalls that say 'dean' on them??? & then sam gets old and sits in the impala & cries while wearing a wig that looks like its from fucking party city?? then sam is on his death bed and his son is there?? && theres all these pictures around him of himsefl and dean & mary & john but?? no wife!? ans also!!? noone else like their friends?? & then sam dies & carry on my wayward son plays for like the second time in the episode. and we see dean on a bridge in heaven, he finally stopped driving & is staring off into the distance. and then he hears something behind him & smiles & we all thought 'CAS???' but NO its fuckingSAM somehow young again like whendean died?? & theylike. hug. and then it pans out & all the cast & crew are there?? and they say thank you to us for watching?? and then ?? its over?????? like Awhta thWHAT THE FUCK
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toast24 · 2 months
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Ooookay, yesterday I said that I might explain the lore behind my Spore captain's story... so here it goes. This is him at the beginning by the way:
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Why is he a cell? What's going on? Well let's just say that he's a little bit older than any other alpferd. Or show I say he's mind and memories? Because as I played through Spore, I imagined that the creature we played as always remembered it's previous lives. So the captain isn't immortal but he gets reincarnated every time.
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He doesn't know why it happens. Almost no one believes him and they just think he's going crazy. And that's how creature stage passes. Only his packmates want to be anywhere near close to him. And they still think that he's a bit weird. It's weird when he talks about something he shouldn't even know happened.
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But he carries on. He feels like he's on a mission to lead his species to greatness. Years pass and he manages to become the chieftain of his new tribe, and allies most of the other tribes (it's more complicated than just that, but I'll talk about it eventually). And finally in the civilization stage, he manages to peacefully unite the whole world (well, as peacefully as possible...).
After all that, he becomes one of two captains of their planet's main spaceship (Yes, there's two of them, but I'll talk about it some other day. But it's related to the fact that I played Spore with my brother).
Buuut, he doesn't really have a name. Well he does but there's just so many of them. Like thousands or milions of them! But I'll eventually give him a name that he uses in the space stage.
I feel a little silly after writing all of that. If anyone is interested by my horse-bugs then I'll happily respond to questions. It'll even help me develop them more. Believe me i'm extremely attached to them for whatever reason, and I really like to come up with new stuff for them.
I think the next things I'll tackle are their clothes and armor. I'll figure out how it all works and stuff. And I'll draw the two captains! And also explain the stages in more detail because this is just a "quick" summary. Why is it so fun to just think of full lore for creatures you made in a 15 year old game?
Here's cake for anyone who read all that:🍰
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I think one of the biggest differences between my vision of Miles G and the general fandom is how I see him interacting with other people. Because, honestly, I don't think he would be... rude. At all. I mean, I'm not taking away from his Brooklyn slang or his experience in the criminal streets. I don't mean he doesn't have triggers that would make him loose himself and be rightfully pissed off because of it. Just like 1610 or any other traumatized person would do.
It just doesn't mean in my mind that he would swear a lot or behave aggressively.
Given the environment in which he grew up for most of his life, none of this would have led to an unreasonable outburst of anger or disrespect.
Look, in ATSV, we have already seen how Rio (remember, his main and only parent) is quite sensitive and serious about the vocabulary her son uses. Take the same moment with "whatever," her reaction was quite strong, primarily because such vocabulary in response to an important speech was hardly something she would want to instill in her child. And, realizing that Miles G will clearly receive even more advice and instruction from her in his later years than his 1610 counterpart, I don't think the strong guidance on his own behavior in social circles would have disappeared quickly even in the worst of worlds. That's why I hc him being more polite that 1610 from time to time — Rio's lessons seems quite strong and unbeatable.
And also about Aaron - as much as people like to hold him up as an example of a "bad influence" on his nephew, he is NOT a bad person. Seriously, the worst thing he did to Miles in the first movie was probably that "hey" trick. Yes, his work as the Prowler wasn't nice or morally right, but we were made to understand that he never meant Miles any harm.
(Did you see the deleted scene from ITSV where Aaron almost literally tells Jeffernos that he doesn't want Miles to end up "like him"?) He would be just about the last person on the list of people who would teach a child to smoke or swear violently, let's be honest.
(I'm not American and I'm not from Brooklyn, so I wouldn't mind if someone corrected me on that part).
However, as a person who knows the belligerent and disturbing atmosphere in my city, it seems to me that you should be cautious rather than angry here. Except for the Prowler, of course: Miles has a little more freedom here and a literal need to be fast and scary, so he deserves a little Spanish swearing in the face of a conventional Octavius.
But if you take, for example, a normal civilian going out and shopping, I don't think that in a world full of crime, Miles G will be looking for a fight. In such cases, you always have to look and know what to say, and who it is better not to approach at all, because the person, for example, may have a gun. Of course, if someone openly insults or threatens him, he can defend himself easily, but in other cases, you need to be even more polite and quiet than usual. His goal is to buy the damn milk and leave, so if he has to say "excuse me, please" to some man at the checkout, nothing terrible will happen. If you ask me, this kind of communication with silent strangers is probably the first thing that comes to mind, but it depends on your perspective.
And the last thing is that he is a child - no 15-year-old teenager with a desire to help his family and psychological isolation will drink alcohol or be angry with all the people in the world. Thank you.
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lucysarah-c · 4 months
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Since I wrote an omegaverse Levi x fem! reader, I'll add here what I believe the ABO dynamics are like, at least in my ABO AU.
First, I would like to clarify that these are not some sort of "universal rules," and everybody has a different interpretation of ABO, etc. Second, this doesn't mean I've thought it all; it's just what I usually keep in mind while writing an omegaverse.
With that being said, let's go.
In my mind, betas behave like normal human beings. Women have their periods once per month, have fertile days each month, and a cycle of 28 days. Men, the same. They lack scent characteristics; they don't have scent glands; they can't knot, etc. Betas do not present, so when the time of presenting comes, they don't suffer what I consider a "second puberty."
Now, Alphas and Omegas.
For me, presentation is like a "second puberty." It usually comes "later," around 15-18 years old, and it determines if they are going to be alphas, omegas, or betas. The lack of this "second puberty" is basically being a beta. Usually, "high breeds" or "pure breeds," either Alphas or Omegas, show clear signs of their nature even before presentation. Perhaps high breed alphas would hiss, have slightly bigger fangs, or even be bigger in size compared to little kids because their genetics are already strong, as an example.
The second puberty basically makes Alphas present, grown fangs (if I'm allowed to go full delulu and magical here) that are sort of "retractile," usually only to be on full size during "asserting dominance" or "during mating." They start to liberate and perceive the smells and pheromones, etc. Omegas go through the same. Usually, the signs are there before their first "rut" or "heat." I like to think that alphas get a sort of toothache when their fangs are growing. I do believe that until reaching adulthood, Omegas and Alphas have ruts or heats in the respective seasons no matter what because it's also their body needing them to develop.
Now, great, what are "seasons"? Basically, Alphas and Omegas only reproduce twice a year, early autumn and early spring. I believe their system is made to "maximize" and "optimize" reproduction, so they prefer "quality" over "quantity." During "season," alphas would go into rut first, before omegas, mostly to secure the territory they want to claim and "show off their capabilities," so omegas can choose before going into heat. The process of mating may last from 4 days to 14. It depends on the quality of the couple.
During the mating ritual, alphas may show their strength, capabilities, and even give gifts of food and decorations to the omega they are fancying to demonstrate their willingness to mate. They may "build" a place where the omega can nest, and both mate. They mate for life, so usually alphas put a lot of effort, and omegas are very picky, lol. I like to think of it like when penguins spend a lot of time choosing the best pebble to give to their partner, and they start to build a nest with that pebble.
What is nesting? Basically, omegas surround themselves with soft pillows, blankets, etc., usually with the smell of their alpha to keep them protected. Like if another alpha steps in and they sense the smell of the omega's alpha around the nest, they may back up because they don't want to compete, or the other alpha is more powerful.
Now, all this is "in nature"; obviously, in society, you don't go fighting people in the streets for your mating rights, lmao. In the "modern society of AOT" (yes, I'm being sarcastic), usually, there are only "glimpses" of what used to be their nature. Alphas are territorial and can easily grow possessive, but it's also encouraged that they learn "to control themselves." Going around baring teeth for whatever would only make you look like some children who can't control themselves. Save them for important occasions. Show how much "better" you are by asserting dominance without having to resort to behaving like a dog.
Fun fact: that's why Hange says in "not in season?" that they had never seen Levi's fangs.
In my mind, high-breeds or pure breed FULL GROWN UP alphas and omegas don't go into rut or heat if they spend long periods without the constant presence of the other. So, they don't waste all the "biologically expensive work" that's for them to go into rut or heat. That's why the military doesn't allow omegas, since they are all going to be living in the barracks, it's better to avoid the problems.
As I say, while in development, young alphas and omegas may experience ruts or heats regularly on their seasons. Young alphas may create a sense of paternity in older alphas, instead of creating a "territorial" sensation. Older alphas may get a sort of baby fever and feel the necessity to be the one leading the pack. This is something that Levi felt about his squad, especially since Eren presented while Levi was looking after him in the former HQ.
While alphas always take positions of power, leadership, or works that demand high physical strength. Sadly, the AOT world isn't exempt from sexism, and omegas are usually reduced to "caring" jobs only. Such as teachers, nannies, bakers, mostly housewives. I do like to believe they are extremely talented for works that require long periods of attention and high attention to details, for example, in a war: snipers. But society has a hard time accepting that.
Now, about high breeds, low breeds. Basically, high breeds mean they are either "purely alphas" or "purely omegas." To explain it with an example, a beta may bear the child of an alpha, but they wouldn't be "pure breed" any longer; they may be "regular alphas," and the more alphas or omegas mix with betas, the less "strong" their blood is. And vice versa, obviously. Conservatives believe that's "wasting your blood, etc.," they are a pain in the ass. I do want to highlight that "purest the alpha/omega," the more
all their characteristics are boosted.
Betas and alphas or betas and omegas may have kids, but it's not that effective. Alphas and alphas CAN have kids if they are "a woman and a man," the process of dominating another alpha is called "bitching," and they have ONLY one kid. I like to think that's like when pregnant women have one child of a different blood type than theirs and they need treatment for the second one because their body rejects the pregnancy otherwise? Well, the same, but since AOT medicine isn't that advanced, alphas women can only bear one child.
Omegas can bear multiple children and, mostly, they have multiple pregnancies. And, on top of that, omegas who mate with an alpha only produce "alphas" or "omegas"; the pureness of the quality isn't lost, and that's why most rich people make sure to force "only omegas x alphas relationships" with their kids because they want plenty of heirs, all pure breed.
Fun fact, in my mind, I think Ackerman are incapable of being anything else than alphas. So they all are.
To set an example, both Erwin and Levi are high-breed alphas. Hange is a regular alpha tending toward a "lower alpha," meaning they have more or the same amount of beta blood as alpha. That's why they imply that Levi might think of "bitching them" if they don't leave, as a joke. This is because Levi, as a high-breed, would have asserted dominance.
… I think that's all. Thank you for coming to my TED talk, lmao.
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b4mpyre-k1zz3s · 1 month
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hello :) So have about we do a fanfic we’re reader is Knoxvilles daughter (she’s like 14-15 whatever) and she does stunts but not like the ones the guys do. So one stunt reader does a crazy stunt and gets very mildly hurt but papa Knoxville is not very happy and very worried???
sorry if this long asf 😭😭 ok bye bye love ya 🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
Knoxville’s Girl
When Johnny’s daughter does her first stunt (behind her father’s back, mind you) he isn’t very happy with his buddies who helped her out.
(Fluff)
1.1k Words
Warnings: Injuries, mention of underage drinking
An: Thank you so much for the request!! Sorry for the long wait in writing this but as a side note you always give me really interesting requests so thank you XD I decided to add in the fact Y/N skates in this fic because when I was 15 I was really adamant about learning. I never did, but I acquired quite a host of bruises as a result! I still have my old board lying around somewhere, I think…Anyways, thank you for the request and please keep them comming!!
Despite what most of America would think, your dad was one of the most responsible men you knew- at least, when it came to you. A lot of this negative press could be attributed to his whole line of work as a stunt man and generally rowdiness with his best friends who he was so close to that you often referred to them as your uncles. As far back as you could remember, you begged him to let you do stunts- it didn’t even have to be all that crazy, you told him. Hell, you would settle for antiquing one of the guys, but nooo. He would always give you the same reasoning, that he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if anything happened to his little girl. Sure, it was sweet, but it’s not like you were eight years old anymore- you were fifteen, and you could handle a few bruises, what with how you were learning to skateboard (and getting pretty damn good at it if you do say so yourself).
While you were forbidden from any stunts, you were allowed to hang out on set with the other guys in between takes. You spent most of your time sitting around with Bam, shooting the shit and talking about skateboarding for hours until he had to go run off and hurt himself more. One time, when Johnny wasn’t around, he even snuck you a beer from one of the coolers, which you tried really hard to make it look like you didn’t think it was gross. That's all to say that your dad didn’t think he was the best influence on you. You and Bam were pretty close, which is why it was him who you ranted to about all of your problems, “Ughh…my dad never lets me have any fun!” Rolling your eyes, you sat back in your seat as you crossed your arms, “I mean, I’m in high school now! All I wanna do is one stunt- just one!” Bam nodded, listening to you. After a silence, he took a drag off his cigarette and spoke, “I mean, I’m sure we could figure something out…” Your head shot up with these wide, excited eyes and you were practically squealing in disbelief, “Wait, really? Like- really really?!” Grinning at your eagerness, Bam shrugged, “Why not? Hell, I’ll get Steve-O in on it too- I’m sure he could come up with somethin’ that won’t get you old man’s panties in’a bunch.”
The idea came from, of all places, a Willie E. Coyote cartoon- you know, the whole ‘painting a tunnel on a wall and getting someone to run into it’ thing? It was Steve’s idea to put you on a skateboard. “C’mon, all you gotta do is drop in! You can’t fuck it up that bad, Y/N.” He was right, you thought. You’d dropped in a couple of times before at the skatepark and never once did you get hurt, which wouldn’t be a possibility this time around because Bam had the genius idea to put a helmet on you to eliminate any element of risk so there was no way Johnny would ‘get all pissy’ with them and also because it’s not a good idea to get your boss’s daughter concussed.
Poised at the top of the coping, you stared down in dislebeif at the drywall in front of you with the crudely painted tunnel on it that Bam was next to. On the other side was Steve who stood ready with the camera, angling it up as he waved at you. “Alright, little lady! We’re rollin’!” Okay, this was happening. It’s happening. Taking a deep breath, you nodded and, not wanting to look like a total pussy, swallowed any traces of tension you had before squeezing your eyes shut and shifting your weight forward. See, the thing is when you’re on a moving object, it’s kind of a good idea to keep your eyes open so you can, you know, see things. This thought didn’t cross your mind as you hurtled down the vert ramp before crashing into the wall- the wall that was supposed to shatter and leave you completely unscathed. The only problem was that it didn’t. Drywall entirely intact, you bounced off of it, landing on your back with this horrible, burning hot pain in your wrist.
You walked away with a sprained wrist, a black eye, and a couple cuts and bruises. Not too bad for your first real stunt, you thought, and it was funny as hell too, as you discovered when Steve was showing you the footage in the ER waiting room to make you feel better. If only Johnny could see the same humor in it as you did. You would’ve thought they were wheeling you back in a full body cast when they got you back to set later that day. Your dad’s eyes got wide and his jaw nearly hit the ground as he gasped, taking in the sight with a voice dripping in concern, “Jesus Christ…” Hurriedly pulling you into his chest, you were about to say some comment about how you were fine and it was totally worth it cause you had a great time, when he looked up at Steve and Bam like he wanted to bite their heads off, “What the hell did you do to her?” Neither had ever seen Johnny this angry and were both starting to regret being a part of this when Bam piped up, “I mean, I dunno what you’re so mad about, man- she wore a helmet.”
Funny enough, that did end up convincing Johnny to let you in on a couple of their milder Jackass stunts only to make sure you could do this sort of thing in a safer, more controlled environment under his watch. Chasing the guys around with cattle prods, rigging the giant hand to hit them as they walked through the halls of the Dickhouse offices- you even got to help Bam out with doing Rockys on the cast and crew (even though he really thought he was a bad influence now). The only other time you saw your dad that worked up was when Bam came up to him on set in between takes sounding pretty nervous himself. “Hey, Knoxville-“ He jabbed a thumb behind him, “You know I’m usually pretty cool about this kinda stuff, but I don’t really think Y/N should be doin’ stunts like that with wild animals…” Suddenly panicking, Johnny flew out of his seat, running over to the bushes where he heard your snickering, only to find you sitting across with Chris who had his hand in the Black Mamba sock puppet, wiggling it around like a snake and hissing. Falling back laughing, all Johnny could do was shake his head, unable to keep a smile from creeping onto his lips.
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yourthirdparent · 2 months
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OH MY GOD okay so a beloved follower of mine sent me an ask about my tristan mclean headcanons like in december but i accidentally deleted !!!!!!! the fuckcing ask !!!!!!!!!!!!!! so i'm making it a post. hope you don't mind. also sorry for the wait
most of my thoughts are things i can not share on this blog (this is the Normal blog for Normal things and not the fucked up torture i subject this man to on a regular basis. tbf i hardly post about it on the Bad Posts blog either but like still. can share it on ao3 though check out sleep by imjustheretoreadonefic (don't do that it's not good)) but you can ask about that (if you want, which you probably won't because it is not most people's thing lmao) on my sideblog, yourfourthparent!! BUTBUTBUT i do have some thoughts and headcanons and such that are at the very least decently presentable!!!!
starting off first: i think he's bi! i think he figured out he was bi when he was pretty young (probably somewhere in his teenage years, probably like 15 max) and when he was in his 20s he was very involved in the queer community (his 20s being. in the 80s. sorry.) and was like a big activist. that is until the curse.
the curse being him hitting his big break. stars in some film that wasn't supposed to really blow up but it like Fucking Smashed and suddenly he was like all those guys who do one role and then are suddenly in Everything. cuz he sure is in literally everything. once he starts blowing up ofc he's got folks to help manage his image and at some point they're like haha [lip bite] you gotta stop with that gay shit or straight audiences won't find you marketable. you're already native and folks can hardly handle that let alone you being an active queer activist. you gotta cut that shit out so you can be the next batman or whatever. and tristan's like Well at least i'll make money to support myself and my dying father!
newsflash his father dies of cancer before he gets a chance. tristan's doing his best to avoid thinking about his father's death so he moves out of oklahoma blah blah yk how it goes.
he has piper when he's 33 ! everything's set and he's settled and then piper comes along and like. he's alright. he can handle this. he can be a good father (he's white knuckling the bathroom sink while he says this)
yeah he's terrified of being a shitty father. he does his best to keep her away from the press and keep her Okay for the most part but in order to do that he doesn't get to see her much etc etc. you know. you've read hoo. bleh
when piper starts dating jason he's like Oh cool ! i am about to break down ! cuz like. hey man. he is so not prepared for the reality of The Passage of Time. wdym his daughter is 16. fym tristan's almost fifty. that's so fucked up how is this allowed.
anyways he and jason are like Besties (*shoving my Bad posts to the side*) like they're such good friends they hang out so often even after jason and piper break up they're just Hiding it then. like they have weekly chess meetings and they talk about books and their lives and jason concerns tristan So Much oh my god tristan is so scared for this poor boy What are those tattoos young man Who are these "wolves" that raised you What is this "legion" Are you in a gang Little private school boy are you in a gang. What do you mean your first language is latin.
ngl my obsession with tristan came from my obsession with jason. i made a post like ages ago about how silly it'd be if tristan was jason's gay awakening and i just kept. thinking about them hanging out. and it spiralled and now i'm insane about him sorry. jason will always be my number one but Oohhhhh tristan consumes me.
anyways live tristan reaction when he finds out jason's mom is beryl grace in the middle of showing jason and piper a million old movies (beryl is in one and jason sees her and immediately freezes and tristan's just talking through the movie (hes silly sorry he talks through the whole thing. piper actually likes it because she has a hard time following movies so tristan explaining everything is good but jason is vaguely annoyed by it. he loves tristan to death don't get him wrong it's just that he can't concentrate on the kovie with tristan spitting fun facts a million words a second) when he looks over to see if theyre still watching and he just sees piper fretting over jason who's looking at the screen with a thousand gard stare.
let's go misc things that i want to mention somewhere but don't really fit uhhhh
i have this idea where tristan used to be a drag queen. i don't have any of the details down not a single one but i think about him talking to piper and her friends about the old days when he was a queen. mentions something offhandedly about how he wants to wear more feminine clothing and someone's like "oh are you like. yk. a gamer" and he's like "oh nonono i'm not trans trust me i explored my gender plenty, wore makeup, padded my bra, did drag for a few years, changed my name—" and they're like "you did DRAG ???" and he's like "OH yeah LOLZ i was terrible lol. my team keeps trying to bury it from public view for a reason. those looks were NOT serving !!!!" (he doesn't talk like that but i'm being silly rn)
(you just knoooooow jason was jaw on the floor immediately looking up TRISTAN MCLEAN DRAG TRISTAN MCLEAN DRAG QUEEN PERSONA NAME TRISTAN MCLEAN DRAG QUEEN TRISTAN MCLEAN— the SECONDDDD he got a chance. like staring so hard at old ass pictures of tristan doing drag and realising like Oh maybe i am bi. piper dumped him because she found his search history /j)
i think when his father died he cut his hair but then when it started growing long again it reminded him too much of the past that he Didn’t Want To Think About so he just. kept it short. and it's been short ever since. BUTBUTBUT when piper decides she wants to reconnect with her culture (which she's been mostly separate from because of tristan's own avoidance of it due to memories of his childhood and his father and blahblahblah) it sort of motivates him to do it too. like if piper's gonna do it after tristan entirely cut her from their culture then like. he can too. and it was a big part of his life when he was younger so like. he knows shit. i'm not good at this btw sorry i just have ideas UGSFHADGSF but anyways when piper starts reconnecting he decides to do it too and his first step with like Getting Comfortable again is growing his hair out. it's a smaller step yk he just doesn't cut his hair it's nothing active. (ofc when it starts getting properly long he has a few moments. he has to really confront his grief over his father's death and just the fear of that alone is enough to make him want to cut it again. piper stops him before he does but he has a few moments where he questions if it's worth it)
ik i just said earlier that he's not trans but like sometimes. with characters. i have headcanons that complety contradict each other. that is to say Transfem tristan mclean headcanon. she changes her name to t. just T. t wynn mclean. she goes by t cuz it's something she's already used to (jason called her that all the time before she came out).
these are all the ones i have off the top of my head agh pleaseplease feel free to ask more about any of these !!! (or critique them lmao half of them are. things i suck at explaining because they exist only for hyperspecific scenarios wherein nothing happens but tristan talking to jason or piper LMAO) you can also send in your own headcanons about him or jason or piper because EYE WANT TO READ MORE ABOUT THEM RAAAAGHHH seriously there's so little stuff that features him especially and if you have literally anything at all i would lovelovelove to read it all !!!!!!! sorry for deleting the ask btw i really didn't mean to LMAO sorry to my honourary mutual (i'd tag you but i'm afraid of misremembering who it was LMAO sorry mate 💔💔)
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greatcheshire · 1 year
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i think you've alluded a few times to the weird food situation you had in your upbringing, so i was wondering if you ever talked at length about that? if not, would you be comfortable saying like, what the heck was up with it? if not thats totally fine, i know it's probably a tough subject, but i will admit i am intrigued.
I believe I've talked about it before, but probably through scattered posts and what not, so I don't mind explaining it! If anything just so I have something to link to when people ask lol
CW: abuse I guess? Idk if this counts for abuse or not but just for safety's sake
Basically I wasn't really exposed to a lot of food as a young child. Like I was a picky eater at a young age, which isn't that unique, but my mom wouldn't pressure me to step out of my comfort zone at all and try anything else (vegetables, bread, most food) and instead resort to whatever I already liked. By the time I was five, this had evolved into my mom rarely, if ever, cooking anything for me and my sister, with her often just getting me fast food nuggets or me having to cook whatever a five year old could easily make and would want to make (aka a lot of microwave pizzas, dinosaur nuggets, hot dogs, and mozzarella sticks. She would give me Twinkies for breakfast, though, as they were "a source of bread so they're healthy"). As a result of this, even if I did want to try new foods, I was often unable to, as they weren't in the house or not something I could easily prep or understand myself.
This evolved once again around the time I was in middle school when my mom had me placed on a very restrictive diet in order to present a legal case for the court regarding my custody, treatment, and physical and mental health. She worked with my doctor at the time to put me on a diet where the only restriction was I couldn't eat anything over 7% saturated fat, which quickly showed to be a flawed system, as it meant I could eat as many cookies as I wanted but wasn't allowed a single yogurt cup. As part of this diet, my mom basically refused to buy any food for me that wasn't cinnamon rolls or Ritz crackers dipped in ranch dressing. So for a few years, so long as I was at my mom's, I was eating either cinnamon rolls or Ritz with ranch for three meals a day, minus the days I could sneak out and secretly use money to buy myself lunch somewhere. I remember one time she had me take a glucose test (where you have to fast and then get your blood drawn every hour for, like, 8 hours) and refused to get me anything real to eat afterwards so I chugged a few Vitamin Waters and ate Ritz crackers with ranch dressing in the hopes that it would help the woozy feeling that comes with having so much blood drawn after fasting.
When I was 14 my mom died and I was now living with my dad full time and at this point my palate began to expand, mainly due to my stepmom encouraging/pressuring me to try things that weren't just chicken tenders, cheese sticks, hot dogs, or pizza. However, I wasn't fully out of the clear yet, as my dad is also a picky, meat and potatoes kinda guy. So while I was trying more and more foods, it was a lot of stuff like pork chops or ribs or brisket or steak. Still good things to try! But not a lot of variety, especially for a family that doesn't eat non-American foods except for Taco Bell and doesn't keep fruits or vegetables in the house. Furthermore, I also had the point where despite being a teenager, being kept away from so much food for so long made me sort of averse to even breaking that barrier. Why try bread at this point when I'm 15 and know that I don't like it? What if I have it and it's gross? What if I finally do try lettuce and it makes me sick? Even when I did try things, a lot of it tasted so differently from what my tastebuds were used to that it was hard to learn to actually like it. This is something I still struggle with, to be honest: how to determine if I actually don't like the taste of something or if's just a new taste I've never experienced before.
It would kinda stay stagnant like this until I was 19, just finishing up my first year in college and about to go into my second. And as we all know, college is the time for discovery and experimentation, which in this case meant trying bread. I don't know why I started branching out into more foods then. I think I had just gotten so tired of eating the same thing every day, especially now that I was on my own in a dorm, that I wanted to at least try some new things, especially if I had a dining hall I could just grab things from. I still didn't explore THAT much, if I'm being honest with myself, but from that point on, at least I started to eat bread and burgers and sandwiches and wasn't totally adverse to the idea anymore.
My food exploration kinda slowed down in my later years in college, mainly because I didn't have the dining hall plan anymore and was low on cash and, well, when you have so little money, you're going to stick with safe food choices because if you spend $10 on a new dish and you hate it, well, guess you're out of dinner money now. But thankfully this year, through friends and travel and my own volition, I've started trying more and more things, trying to adapt to a "I'll try whatever" mentality (unless it has nuts in it because wow I hate nuts so much). It took a while, and I'm still learning and dealing with things, but I've come to realize that I don't need to fear food anymore, and now that I have my own place with my own income, I can purchase and try whatever I want to and don't have to worry about any outside pressure one way or the other. It's been a struggle. But it's getting better.
I hope that clears things up! I'm sure there's probably still questions and maybe this doesn't make sense at all but I hope fills in some gaps, at the very least.
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tickling-giggles · 5 months
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Hello! I was the one who sent that last ask (meant to say accounts not bliss idk why it autocorrected to that) and that’s so great! So if it’s not against your rules may I request ler illumi with a lee younger sister reader? Not too much younger, like only three years? So they’re both adults :D Thank you, I love your work!
You’re still the same
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Summary: Illumi is helping you move into your apartment and he brings up some of his your favorite memories together. You explain how you’re 22 now and not a little girl anymore but Illumi has ways to prove other wise.
Fem!reader (little sister) no weird stuff just sibling love. There also is a wee bit of swearing
A/n: first one of the day 🌟(this is probably so freaking terriblezzz) Gon x Killua are mentioned. I tried giving Illumi a little flavor
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“Do you need any assistance?” Illumi asked as he saw you struggling with a huge mirror. “I got it Ill” you simply responded as you almost break the mirror. “You know I’m here to hel—“ he was about to remind you for the MILLIONTH time before you cut him off “yes yes Ill I know you’re here to help your sister whenever with whatever but I got it” you sighed, laughing to yourself as you looked around to see what else needs to be done. “You forgot the little infront of sister.” He said just to be an ass.
“I’m only three years younger shut up plus I am 22 years old now technically 23 sine my birthday is next month” you lightly hit his arm as you crossed arm side-eying him with a grin on your face. “Still little not only in age but in size too Kil may be taller than you” he raised a brow as he scoffed. “You’re still my little sister at the end of the day plus it’s not like I’m calling you my baby sister so you’re okay.”
“Okay but like it sounds like we’re 12 and 15” you looked at him. “You remember at school when you tripped that one kid and he fell down the stairs but only his arm broke from the fall” Illumi chuckled at bit bringing up old memories. “Oh my gosh yes he had it coming he was so annoying” you shrugged your shoulders smiling. “You remember when you dislocated the chimera ant’s shoulder” he brought up. “Can you believe I was only 4 when I did that” you smiled. “Not to brag but I taught you that when you were 3” he said as he brushed his fingers through his hair.
“No need to gloat there bucko” you chuckled. “See I taught my little sister so much” he patted your head before you swatted his hand and point at him. “I am 22! I’m not little I am an adult and how dare you pat my head.”you dramatically acted shocked.“Look at you trying so hard to be so proper that adorable I should tell mom.”Illumi teased. “Actually I am an adult adorable is not in my vocabulary and you should start acting your age too” you sassed him.
“Oh I’ll act my age like the annoying 15 year old brother I can be” he raised his eyebrows popping his knuckles. “You threatening me?… Wait! Illumi no don’t fucking do it” you point at him slowly backing away. “Do what y/n? Tickle you?” He asked in a sly tone as he inch towards you. “Yehes exactly that” you giggled as you tried to make a run for it. He swiftly grabbed your wrist pinning you onto the sofa. “I’ve been a big brother for how many years 22 I knew you were try to make a run for it” he scoffed.
“Would you like to change your mind? Hint hint this is your last chance” illumi asked. “Fuhuhuck off” you giggled anticipating. “No wonder we’re Kil gets it from learned from his bad mouth sister” he chuckled a bit as he poked at your sides.
“Yohohou’re such ahahan ass hahaha” you giggled. “So what you are too” he sassed pinching your sides. “Someone is quite squirmy today” he teased acting clueless. “Yohohou’re literally tihihickling me”
“Oh I am?! I didn’t even notice” he acted surprised.
“Wehehehehe are lihihihuterally aduhuhults and yohohou’re tickling mehehehehe like a frehehheheaking kid” you laugh as you weakly push at his hands as he gotten closer and closer to your armpits. “I wouldn’t care if we were 75 and 72 uh oh someone is getting a bit squeaky” he scoffed as he teased. “Ihihi am nohohohot”
“You are so stubborn you know none of this would be happening right now if you just accepted you’re my little sister” Illumi explained finally reaching your armpit. IHIHILLUMEHEHEHEHEHEE STAHAHAHAHAP IHIHIHUT”
“OHOHOHKAHAHAY ILLUMEHEHEHEHE IHIHIM STIHIHIHIHILL YOHOHOHOUR LITTLE SISTERAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA” You squealed as you gave in slapping the floor. “And don’t forget it” he said as he stopped the tickles. “You’re still a teen ya’know you may legally be an adult doesn’t mean you have to immediately start acting like one” he told you.
“My god you’re acting like she’s going mars for the rest of eternity” Killua exaggerated rolling his eyes. “I can give you this treatment too Kil” Illumi said with a bit of mischief in his eyes. “Yohou’re one to tahahalk didn’t mom say you were bawling your eyes out when you first found out I was moving” you laughed as you teased him.
“Anywayssssss mom wants us all back for dinner” he side-eyed you with a faint blush, as he put his hands in his pockets. “Are you bringing your boyfriend?” Illumi teased as he smirked a tiny bit. “I—WH—HE— SHUT UP!!” Killua stuttered blushing even more as he slammed the door “HURRY UP!!”.
“Come on before he starts whining and pouting” you rolled your eyes as you got up.
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Text
IT IS TIME...to make an old-fashioned embarrassing text post like those days of yore before my old therapist started doing CBT.
So, I started an OK Cupid account. It’s kind of a big step, and also something I’ve been joking about for more than a year. Just any time something funny or self-deprecating (or vaguely dirty) came up I’d be like ‘putting that on the OKC profile!’ In the end my OKC profile is pretty tame. Maybe too tame really. I should probably rewrite my bio so I sound nerdier and more romantic or something.
ANYWAY. The point is, it’s scary, knowing that in order to be loved you must submit to the ordeal of being known or whatever, but I took a tiny step which feels like a huge step after ten eleven years of singlehood and touch starvedness. Now I just need someone to message me so I can take another small terrifying step and meet them. And so on and so on. It’s just fear all the way down with me when it comes to intimacy. IT’S FINE. I EMAILED A POSSIBLE THERAPIST THIS EVENING.
Last weekend I met with a friend who just graduated library school and talked to her about how to find a job and such. It was cathartic, and also heartening. I really do have a lot of practical skills from the work I’ve been doing for fifteen years now. She said I have experience with things they didn’t even really learn in grad school, that she’s had to learn on the job. That makes me feel a little better. I still worry about how glutted the librarian market is up here, but there really are a ton of library jobs to apply for in all different industries, so I’ll probably find something that will pay me enough and not murder me eventually.
(My Indeed email today had a listing for a Digital Archivist for the MFA but the pay only went up to $49K??? THAT’S LESS THAN THE TOO LITTLE I’M MAKING NOW. God I’d love to work at the MFA though. CAN YOU IMAGINE? Do I just apply anyway and then be like, just kidding, I want $70K, thanks.)
I’ve also been using they/them pronouns at work with select people. Mostly with my boss and within the Queer ERG channels. And I guess with my grand boss, who guessed it all on her own through a series of slightly hilarious events. I’m not demanding anything, and I still have they/she in my signature because I hate rocking boats and know that I’m femme a lot of the time so I know how people will see me and I don’t want to fight with everyone ever about it and yada yada. Maeve says that’s stupid. She’s probably right, but like. Maybe if I find a new therapist they can help me work through that. I’ve been taking up more space lately, but still not as much as a person probably should.
Like I said, baby steps.
Anyway, my boss saw me list myself as they/them in an ERG meeting this morning and during our one-on-one later she said she was proud of me for all of the hard, scary stuff I’ve been doing lately. (Which she knows about because we talk about work approximately half the time when we talk.) It feels silly to be proud of it all, because most people do this at like, 20, right? All of it. Being able to date, knowing who you are, knowing what kind of job you want. But because she’s a good person she reminded me that when I was 15 and 20 I wasn’t in places where it was safe to make some of these decisions, or even if it was, I didn’t have the support for them. So yeah, I’m proud of it all.
In the last twenty-five years I’ve gone from suicidal to ambivalent to apathetic to super depressed to figuring it out to figuring it out to figuring it out. I’m still figuring it out. But I have an excellent support system. I have people who love me and want to know the whole me. Want me to know the whole me. I have tools to help myself emotionally. I have hope.
I can lament over the lost time, or I can look ahead with a mind to make use of all the time I have left. I maybe got here a little bit after everyone else. I may still be working toward it, but I’m here and I’m working. I’m doing hard, scary things, and that’s what being alive is all about, right?
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littlestarabove · 9 months
Text
One Master of Death
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➼ pairing: Harry Potter x reader
➼ summary: This drabble illustrates your years with Harry and his friends all leading up to the present… and what a dark present it is.
➼ word count: 13.9k (this is too long to be considered a drabble… oops)
➼ what to expect: “I would say something witty… but my mind is blank.”
➼ additional warnings: angst, character death, deathly hallows part 1 spoilers, almost graphic injuries (if you squint, i don’t like blood either)
➼ talk to my characters!
➼ IF YOU HAVE SEEN THIS SOMEWHERE ELSE, it was posted to a different blog, also owned by ME, so it's still my original work
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You never thought it would come to this.
Things didn’t turn out the way you expected them to, and certainly didn’t fall in line with your previous years at Hogwarts had gone.
All your life, being a witch had been a dream. Magic was absolutely fascinating to you. When you received your invitation to join Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, you weren’t shocked, scared, or even nervous. You were ecstatic. You’d always known there was magical presence within your life, though your Muggle parents always chalked it up to your over-active imagination. You couldn’t find any other way to explain the strange occurrences when you were sad, angry, scared, or even happy. Objects levitated, valuables shattered, and other unexplainable things happened with your emotions that not even the best doctors could understand.
You could finally tell your family “I told you so,” when your letter came in the mail- well, rather by screech owl. Next thing you knew, after converting all of your allowance to galleons, you were on your way to Diagon Alley.
Now, this place was your dream. Every where you looked, magic inhabited every nook and cranny. You didn’t even know where to start. Of course, you had your list of school supplies, but you weren’t paying it any mind as your head ran ramped with thoughts about where to begin. You hadn’t even arrived at Hogwarts and you were planning out the next seven years of your academic career with extreme detail.
You were wandering aimlessly when you saw her- through the musty window The Magical Menagerie inside of a golden cage- your future companion and confidant. She was the most majestic creature you’d ever seen, and you wanted nothing more than for her to be yours.
You walked out of The Magical Menagerie with your very own screech owl, who you later decided to call Maggie. There was no particular reasoning as to why you picked that name- it just seemed fitting.
Your wand ceremony was probably something you would remember for the remainder of your life. It was one of the most magical and ethereal events you’d experienced in your entire life. The wand that settled on you was made of reed wood, 15 inches long, with a core of dragon heartstring. Mr. Ollivander specified that you were destined for a dramatic, adventured-filled life, but also warned you of the dangers that lied ahead of you.
Whatever that meant. You didn’t take him seriously. You were 11.
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You want to say you met Hermione Granger due to the fact that you’re both amazing people adept with social skills and the ability to integrate with other witches and wizards, but that would be a big, fat lie.
You met her when you both stayed in the library after hours, which resulted in the two of you being locked in for the night until someone came to open it up in the early hours of the morning.
Which wasn’t for a long time.
It was your second year at Hogwarts, and this mistake was understandable… for a first year. Had you been 11, you wouldn’t have been so hard on yourself. But, no, you were at the grand age of 12 years old, you should know better.
That’s what your tween brain thought, at least. You used to look back on this memory with Hermione and laugh.
Speak of the devil, this is how you got to know the brilliant witch, through forced socialization behind the locked doors of the dimly lit library.
“Guess we’re stuck here, huh?” you were the first to speak. Hermione looked up at you and nodded.
“Guess we are.” She pouted.
“I’m Y/N L/N.” You stuck your hand out for Hermione to shake, which she did, politely.
“I’m Hermione Granger.” She smiled brightly, to which you returned.
“So… how did you end up in here past closing?” you asked cautiously.
“I simply lost track of time, I was looking for something.” Hermione explained vaguely, the both of you seated hopelessly in front of the doors to the exit. You sighed deeply.
“I fell asleep on my book.” you admitted. Hermione giggled, which pulled a laugh of your own through your throat.
“The boys are never going to let me live this one down.” Hermione sighed with a hopeless grin. You tilted your head at her.
“The boys?” you questioned curiously. Hermione smiled sheepishly. “My friends, Harry and Ron. They’re going to tease me about this endlessly.” Hermione chuckled.
“Harry? As in, Harry Potter?” you questioned, to which Hermione confirmed with a nod. “I’ve seen him around, but never here.”
Hermione snorted and shook her head. “That’s because I don’t think they’ve ever set foot in the library.” she snickered.
“That’s a shame, I love it in here. It’s where I belong.” You joked, beaming.
“I practically live in here, how come I’ve never seen you before?” Hermione inquired with confusion. Your cheeks turned a dull shade of red as you ducked your head.
“I sit near the back, it’s quieter back there.” You explained nervously.
“Ah, that would be why. I sit near the front.” Hermione giggled.
Next thing you knew, the two of you were chatting and sharing life stories while playing with the cards with a pack that you had buried in one of your robe pockets.
“What are you actually doing stuck here, Hermione?” you raised an eyebrow as you adjusted your hand of cards. Hermione sighed in defeat.
“I guess I could tell you. I’m looking for a recipe for polyjuice potion.” she admitted as she scanned her remaining cards.
“Wow, that’s quite complicated, I hear. I’m impressed. What do you need it for?”
“We’re trying to figure out who the heir of Slytherin is, and we need the potion to sneak into their common room undetected.” Hermione explained thoroughly.
“Oh, that rumor with the horrid message written in blood on the wall? I thought it was all an elaborate prank, but then the professors began to worry, so I knew it was serious.” You clarified with a grimace.
“We think it’s Malfoy.” Hermione announced. You snorted. “Doesn’t everyone? Malfoy is the perfect git to be the heir to a Muggle hating wizard.” you grumbled.
Hermione laughed. “Ron and Harry would like you, you’re funny and you hate Malfoy. That’s two things they look for in a person.” Hermione joked with a hint of seriousness.
“I think I would like them as well.” you smiled with a polite undertone.
Hermione looked at her cards and groaned. “I fold.” She placed her cards face down. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
“I thought we were playing go-fish?”
The two of you burst into a fit a laughter. That was the night that began a lasting friendship between two extraordinary witches.
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“Hermione, why are we in such a rush?” Ron whined as he struggled to keep up with her fast pace. Hermione huffed.
“I’ve got a friend keeping the book we need safe. We’re already late meeting her there.” Hermione explained in exasperation.
The trio burst through the doors to the library and Hermione began to scan the crowd when she remembered something important.
“She sits near the back, come on.” Hermione waved urgently as she began her path to the back of the library.
She peeked into every row with the hope of finding you sitting alone with the book you’d promised to find in your free time. Much to Hermione’s surprise, you weren’t as close to the back as she had originally thought. She found you in no time.
“There you are! I was beginning to worry.” You noticed them as they came barreling down towards you, all with heavy breathing.
“Sorry. Lost track of time.” Hermione apologized. You shook your head.
“No worries. I’ve got the book here.” You shook the book in your hand to indicate your findings.
Harry and Ron stood utterly confused behind Hermione as she took a seat without hesitation.
“Who are you?” Ron asked quite bluntly. Hermione groaned.
“Must you be so direct?” Hermione gestured to you. “Harry, Ron, this is Y/N. Y/N, this Harry, and that’s Ron.” Hermione pointed to each boy respectively. You beamed widely at them.
“Pleasure to meet you both.” neither of them replied, only stared at you.
“Warm welcome.” you chuckled awkwardly. Hermione noticed your distress and hurried to confront the boys.
“Be polite. She’s helping us.” Hermione gestured violently for them to sit. They both did as they were told.
You tried your best to ignore the fact that Hermione might as well have promised that you would be well-liked by her friends. You chewed on the inside of your cheek nervously as you presented Hermione with the book you’d promised her.
In the dark nook, you, Harry, Ron, and Hermione huddled around the book entitled “Moste Potente Potions.” The spotted pages were littered with disturbing illustrations.
You flipped to your book mark and dragged your finger under the sub title.
“Here it is: ’The Polyjuice Potion. Properly brewed, the Polyjuice Potion allows the drinker to transform himself temporarily into the physical form of another’…” You read directly from the text, trailing off as you reached the end of the important information.
“You mean, Harry and I drink some of this stuff and we turn into Crabbe and Goyle?” Ron leaned forward to clarify his suspicions.
“Yes.” Hermione assured. Ron beamed widely.
“Wicked! Malfoy’ll tell us anything!” Ron exclaimed excitedly.
“Exactly. But, it’s tricky. I’ve never seen a more complicated potion. Lacewing flies, leeches, fluxweed. And, of course, we’ll need a bit of whoever we want to change into too.” Hermione worried her bottom lip as she read over the ingredients for the overly complicated and advanced potion.
“Hang on now. I’m drinking nothing with Crabbe’s toenails in it.” Ron grumbled with a grimace.
“How long will it take to make?” Harry leaned forward over Ron’s shoulder to take a more intricate peek at the instructions.
“It looks like a month.” you scanned over the pages carefully.
“A month? But if Malfoy is the heir of Slytherin… he could attack half the Muggle-borns in the school by then.” Harry cautioned. Hermione shivered.
“As if people like us need more reason to be targeted by Malfoy.” You placed your chin in the palm of your hand with a pout.
Hermione beamed. “You’re a Muggle-born as well? I knew we were going to be great friends.”
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Harry and Ron made their exit from their library as you and Hermione remained seated to further study the potion to better learn the ins and outs.
Ron pulled Harry aside with a worried expression. “I don’t think Y/N being in our group is a good idea. We do not need another Hermione to nag us about every little thing.” Ron was practically livid. Harry shrugged.
“I dunno. I think it would be nice to have another girl around. Someone… to keep Hermione occupied.” Harry’s lie wasn’t the most clever, but he figured it was enough to throw Ron off his scent. Quite frankly, the prospect of having another girl join their group made Harry quite flustered, especially due to the fact that you’re probably one of the prettiest 12-year-olds he’d ever seen. But, of course, it didn’t take much to convince Ron otherwise.
“You’re right. That would be a big weight off our own shoulders.” Ron agreed. Harry smiled in spite of his lie.
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Third Year
Silence. A room of shadows. While those around him slumbered, Harry lied awake, unable to sleep. Finally, he turned to his cupboard, took out the Marauder’s Map, and whispered,
“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”
The crooked corridors and serpentine passageways of Hogwarts radiated across the parchment, then… a tiny dot caught Harry’s eye. He frowned. It read: “Peter Pettigrew.”
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Harry moved down a dark corridor, map in hand, wand aglow. In the paintings he passed, the subjects snored softly.
Harry’s and Peter’s figures on the map drew closer and closer.
Harry squinted toward the end of the corridor. Down at the map. Pettigrew moved quickly down the adjoining corridor. Twenty yards away. Ten. Only seconds away…
Wand trembling in his hand, Harry glanced from the map to the dark corridor ahead, again and again. Then… as the two dots were about to collide… he looked slowly up, turned the corner, heart in his chest… and met-
You?
“Oh! Harry!” You exclaim as you nearly rammed right into Harry.
Harry blinked, startled, then glanced down at the map. Pettigrew had moved past him, but your figure stood adjacent to his. Odd, how hadn’t he noticed that before?
“Y/N. What are you doing down here?” Harry raised an eyebrow in question. You were quick to explain yourself.
“Hermione wanted to conduct some research on werewolves… can’t imagine why… but she mentioned something about it being far too late for her, so I went instead.” You gestured to all the rolls of parchment in your arms- your diligent notes.
“I was just on my way back… hold on, what are you doing up at this hour, Harry?” you redirected the conversation onto Harry. He froze.
“Um… well…” Harry glanced down at the map, flustered, and back up to you.
“Is that the Marauder’s Map? The Weasley twins mentioned that they gave it to you.” You pointed at the map in curiosity. Harry’s expression turned confused, but, yet again, you were quick to clarify.
“I was helping them set up a prank… they needed to know the precise angle a… certain bucket had to be placed at on the top of a… certain professor’s door.” you grinned sheepishly rocking on your heels. Harry smiled softly.
“I was just… looking for someone. I think the map is mistaken… says Peter Pettigrew is heading… that way.” Harry pointed in the direction he’d come from. You follow his finger.
“Pettigrew? Hermione mentioned he was dead.” You shrugged. Harry mimicked your actions.
“Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s follow it.” you gestured in the direction that Harry had pointed to. Confused but excited, Harry turns on his heel to follow you, casting his wand along the walls.
“Watch it there, boy!”
You and Harry jumped. But it was only an old man in a painting, scowling in the glare of Harry’s wand light. On the map, Pettigrew continued to move away. Harry made to follow, with you in tow, then stopped, hearing footsteps. The wand’s spot danced across the parchment, and found another dot. Approaching fast: Severus Snape.
“Put it away!” You hissed urgently. Harry fumbled to put the tip of his wand on the map. “Mischief managed!” He stashed the map away, extinguishing his wand, and turned… into the harsh glare of Snape’s wand.
“Potter.” Snape sneered. Snape moved his wand slightly to the left and illuminated you, grinning sheepishly.
“L/N.” He grumbled.
“What’re you two doing wandering the corridors at night?” Snape questioned.
“We were… we were sleepwalking…”
A sneer curdled the corner of Snape’s lips.
“How extraordinarily like your father you are, Potter. He, too, was exceedingly arrogant. Strutting about the castle-”
“My dad didn’t strut. Nor do I. Now, if you don’t mind, I’d appreciate you lowering your wand.” Harry straightened and nodded towards Snape’s wand, aimed directly to his face and nearly blinding him.
Snape eyed Harry coldly, containing himself. He lowered his wand.
“Turn out… your pockets, the both of you.” Snape demanded.
You nor Harry moved, Harry’s eyes still boring into Snape.
“Turn out your pockets!”
Finally, the both of you obliged. You turned up with nothing but your scrolls. But, seeing the map, Snape’s eyes glittered.
“And this. What might it be?” He asked.
“Spare bit of parchment…” You came up with hastily. Your mind worked quickly when it came to confrontation, it was one of your skills.
“Really…” Snape poised his wand over the map. “Reveal your secrets!”
To both of your horror, words began to appear. Snape studied you both, a sadistic half-smile on his lips. He turned the map your way.
“Read it.” Snape ordered.
“Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs… offer their compliments to Professor Snape… and…” Harry glanced up at professor Snape after reading the rest, unsure.
“Go on.” Snape urged. You leaned over Harry’s shoulder and snorted.
“And request that he keep his abnormally large nose out of other people’s business.” You snickered, your eyes locked with Snape’s.
Snape’s smile drooped. “Why you insolent little-”
“Professor?”
Snape turned to see Professor Lupin standing in the shadows.
“Well, well. Lupin. Out for a little walk in the moonlight, are we?” Snape sneered.
“Harry? Y/N? You all right?”
“That remains to be seen. I’ve just now confiscated a rather curious artifact from Mr. Potter and Miss L/N. Take a look, Lupin. This is supposed to be your area of expertise.” Snape snatched the parchment from Harry’s grip and presented it to Lupin. Lupin took the parchment, which now displayed a rather unflattering caricature of Snape and a pair of potions.
“Clearly, it’s full of dark magic.” Snape continued.
“I seriously doubt that, Severus. it looks to me as if it merely insults anyone who tries to read it. It suspect it’s a Zonko product. Nevertheless, I shall pursue any hidden qualities it may possess. As you say, it’s my area of expertise. Come, Harry, Y/N.”
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The two of you walked aside a fuming Lupin, who gripped the map fiercely.
“I don’t know how this map came to be in your possessions, Harry, Y/N, but I’m astounded that you didn’t turn it in immediately. Especially you, Miss L/N. For all that time you spend with Granger, I would have expected her behavior to rub off on you in some way.” Lupin fumed. You hung your head. Lupin directed his next comment to Harry.
“Harry, did you ever stop to think that this- in the hands of Sirius Black- is a map to-”
Lupin stops when he realizes that he and Harry were not alone, and stops himself from going any further. Harry waved his hands in defense. “Don’t worry, Professor… she knows… about Sirius.” Harry was referring to the information Hermione had entrusted you with recently- About Harry’s relation to Sirius and the plot against him.
You nodded in confirmation. Lupin sighed with an expression of relief.
“A map to you?” he finished. Harry walked alongside silently, you hot on his heels. Lupin could barely contain his anger.
“Your father didn’t set much store by rules either. But he and your mother did give their lives to save yours. Gambling their sacrifice by walking about the castle unprotected, with a killer on the loose, strikes me as a poor way to repay them. I won’t cover for you again, Harry.”
Lupin entered his office, tossed the map on his desk, and began to sort through some papers. You and Harry lingered briefly in the doorway. You absently eyed the waxing moon that glimmered beyond the window, then stared to turn away.
“Professor. Just so you know, I don’t think the map always works. Earlier, it showed someone in the castle. Someone I know to be dead.” You directed your attention to Lupin, away from the moon.
“And who was that, Y/N?” He was only half-listening.
“Peter Pettigrew.” Harry finished.
Lupin hesitated ever-so-slightly, then returned to his papers.
“Very well. I’d like you to return to your dormitories now. Oh, and don’t take any detours.”
As you and Harry looked back, Lupin tapped the map. “If you do, I’ll know.” Lupin smirked slightly.
You and Harry rounded the corner and set on the path back to the Gryffindor common room.
The moment you’re out of sight of Lupin’s office, your burst into a fit of giggles, catching Harry by surprise.
“That was amazing. When you spend all of your time with Hermione, you never almost get caught like that! Oh, it was exhilarating.” you sighed happily, turning to Harry.
“I… never would have thought that you liked things of the sort.” Harry nervously scratched the nape of his neck as the two of you neared the common room.
“There’s a lot you’ll have to learn about me, Harry. I’ll see you later?” You murmured the password to the common room and stepped inside, Harry not far behind. You moved to disappear up the stairs to the girls’ dormitories when Harry stopped you.
“Have breakfast with us tomorrow.” he blurted. It was enough to stop you in your tracks and to make you turn to face him.
“Hm. I suppose I could. I’ll see you there, Potter.” you disappeared around the staircase.
Harry smiled to himself, his heart pitter-pattering in his chest as he stared off in the direction you disappeared in.
Oh dear, was he in trouble now.
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Fourth Year
It was almost as if your fourth year (so far) had gone by in a blur. You arrived at school, got a new, suspiciously shady professor, and all of a sudden, Harry as a contestant in the infamous Triwizard Tournament. You were worried because of what the tournament was infamous for- severe injury and competition to the death.
You, Hermione, Ron, and Harry were sat in the Great Hall, scowling at the latest addition of the Daily Prophet. Hermione had been made out to look like she was after two famous wizards- Viktor Krum and Harry. She was livid, but you all managed to distract her for a limited period of time.
“Parcel for you, Mr. Weasley.” a small boy approached the table and presented Ron with a particularly large parcel.
“Ah, thank you, Nigel.”
The boy stared in jittery awe at Harry.
“Not now, Nigel.” Ron urged Nigel off.
As Nigel stumbled off, you, Harry, and Hermione eyed Ron. He shrugged.
“I told him I’d get him Harry’s autograph. Hey look. Mum’s sent me something… Mum’s sent me a dress.”
Harry watched Ron lift a lace-trimmed gown from the box.
“Does match your eyes. Is there a bonnet? Ah- hah!” Harry pulled a matching little collar from the box and tossed it at Ron. You giggled from beside Harry, not-so-subtly drinking a sip of pumpkin juice to hide it.
“Nose down, Harry.” Ron grumbled. He moved to Ginny hopefully. “Hey, Ginny. This must be for you.”
Ginny grimaced at the manky old thing. “I’m not wearing that. It’s ghastly.” She gasped as she laid eyes on it.
Hermione, back of her hand pressed to her mouth, suppressed a laugh.
“What are you on about?” Ron grumbled.
“They’re not for Ginny. They’re for you. Dress robes.” Hermione clarified with a smile.
“Dress robes? For what?” Ron panicked.
Professor McGonagall seemed to appear out of no where, making herself known by answering Ron’s question. “The Yule Ball. Which, if you don’t mind, I’d like to speak to you about, Potter.”
Harry nodded as he let McGonagall pull him off to the side to speak to him privately.
“The Yule Ball, Professor?” Harry questioned as they were out of earshot from his friends.
“It’s traditional during the Triwizard Tournament for the host school to put on a Christmas ball. It is also traditional for the three Champions- or in this case four- to be the first to dance.”
Harry cocked his head, as if he had water in his ear.
“Dance? With a girl?” His voice shook slightly with the question.
“Traditionally with a young lady, yes. Why don’t you take…” McGonagall searched the area where Harry’s friends sat for a suitable date. Her eyes settled on you and she smiled.
“Miss L/N? You’ve been spending an awful lot of time with her, recently. And she’s a lovely girl. A lot like your friend, Miss Granger.” McGonagall beamed as she gestured to you.
Harry followed her line of sight as his eyes settled on you as well. You sat in your seat quietly, sipping absentmindedly on your goblet of pumpkin juice as you watch Hermione and Ron converse heatedly about the condition of his ancient dress robes.
You open your mouth and make some kind of remark, which Harry can’t hear, but it caused Hermione to laugh whole-heartedly, which Ron soon joined in reluctantly, and even Ginny snickered to herself.
Harry beamed unconsciously. “She is lovely, isn’t she?” He sighed. McGonagall’s smile widened but Harry quickly caught himself.
“Oh, um, I mean, I could… ask Y/N. As friends, of course.” He added hastily. McGonagall’s smile slightly faltered but she continued nonetheless.
“I leave that decision up to you, Potter. But know this: the House of Godric Gryffindor has a reputation as long as it is illustrious. It demands and receives the respect of the entire wizard world. No house has produced more witches and wizards of consequence. You stand upon the shoulders of giants, Potter. Shame yourself and you shame all who came before you.”
Just then, a commotion was heard. Turning, McGonagall watched Seamus pelt Dean Thomas with a custard pie.
McGonagall’s face dropped.
So much for honoring the house of Gryffindor.
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The entire rank and file of Godric Gryffindor’s current roster- girls on one side, boys on the other, stood before a fierce McGonagall in what you could only conclude as some sort of dance class.
“You have to get a grip! Your behavior barely rises to the level of the common toadstool! I WILL NOT HAVE IT!”
The students exchanged nervous glances.
“Now. To dance is to let the body…” McGonagall took a deep breath as demonstration, “… breathe. Inside every girl a secret swan slumbers, longing to burst free and take flight. Inside each boy, a lordly lion, prepared to prance.” McGonagall illustrated.
“Something may be about to burst out of Eloise Midgen, but I don’t think it’s a swan.” Ron snickered.
“Mr. Weasley.”
“Yes?” Ron jumped and yelled his response, surprised to have been caught.
“Would you join me, please?” McGonagall glared intensely.
Ron glanced about in a panic, then slumped forward like a man heading to the gallows.
“Now then, if you will, put your left hand on my waist…”
“Where?!”
“My waist, Mr. Weasley.”
Grudgingly, Ron obeyed. As Fred and George whistle, Ron raised his right hand in a rude rejoinder when McGonagall closed her hand over his just in the nick of time.
“That’s right, extend your arm… and, Mr. Filch, if you would…”
Filch dropped the needle onto an old record player and a musty waltz filled the courtyard. Instantly, Neville smiled, bobbing his head, as if transported by the music.
“And one and two…” McGonagall kept the tempo skillfully.
“Oi!” Harry leaned back to Fred and George, who leaned forward to accommodate his height.
“Never going to let him forget this, are you?” Harry grinned. Fred and George shook their heads.
“Never. ” They replied incredibly in sync.
“Everyone! Come together…” McGonagall urged as she continued her waltz with a reluctant Ron.
The music swelled as the girls and boys nervously crossed the divide and began to pair off.
You shuffled anxiously through the crowd, watching as it seemed that every girl had a partner save for you.
You could feel your anxiety begin to spike and your self-esteem drop to an all-time low when-
“What’s a pretty girl like you doing over here all alone?”
You spun around quickly at the familiar voice and found the teasing face of Harry Potter standing before you. You sighed in relief.
“Oh, um… just observing, I guess.” You replied unconvincingly.
“Don’t observe. Come dance. I need practice.” Harry took your hand and led you to the floor.
Harry placed his his over your rib-cage while you placed your hands on his shoulder and in his other hand. You giggled.
“Harry, your hand goes on my waist, dear.” you mimicked McGonagall the best you could. Harry snorted with a faint flush dusting the apples of his cheeks in the most flattering way.
“I know.” He scoffed. You rolled your eyes and removed your hand from his shoulder to encase it over his wrist and pushed it down on to your lower waist.
“You do need practice, Potter.” you moved your feet according to the music as Harry clumsily attempted to mimic you. He did end up stepping quite harshly on your toes, however.
“Ow!” You gasped, removing your hands from him to hop on one foot.
“Sorry! I’m just… extremely uncoordinated.” Harry groaned at himself. You dusted off your now unpolished uniform shoe and waved him off assuringly.
“That’s what this class is for. Just follow my lead.” You nodded down to your feet and Harry followed your eyes.
“One, two, three… one, two, three…” You began softly as you moved slowly to accommodate Harry’s speed.
“How do you know so much about dancing?” Harry asked without taking his eyes from both of your feet.
“My parents are Muggles, I attended cotillion as a child.” you reminded with a smile. Harry looked up at you, realizing your faces were in very close proximity.
“Well… um… lucky me, I guess.” He chucked nervously. You beamed brightly at him, resulting in his heart jumping into his throat and being unable to keep himself quiet.
“Would you teach me how to dance?” He blurted instinctively. Your mind blanked for a moment as you were making sure you heard him correctly.
“I just… McGonagall told me not to embarrass Gryffindor and I thought that I should take some lessons from someone with dancing experience…” Harry avoided eye contact with you. Your heart sank into your stomach. Why on earth did you think he was going to ask you to be his date? You’re only friends.
“Oh, um… right, yeah. Sure. I’ll teach you a few things.” You tried to keep your voice from shaking, but the disappointment was clearly present.
Harry grinned half-heartedly. “Great.”
If only the both of you knew how much the other’s heart was sinking down into the depths of hopelessness.
You were beginning to think Gryffindor, known for courage, was not the house for you. You wondered what was going through the sorting hat’s mind when he placed you.
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After a few days of unsuccessfully acquiring a Yule Ball date, Harry made his way to the Owlery, which stood like a stranded scarecrow in a sea of white. Suddenly, an owl fluttered forth and Harry halted. Footsteps sounded and a figure descended the Owlery’s snow-laden stairs, flickering in and our of view. Seconds later, a girl appeared.
Cho.
“Harry.” Cho acknowledged.
“Cho.”
They stood awkwardly for a moment. Cho gestured all around. “Beautiful, isn’t it?” She questioned quietly. Harry nodded.
“Yeah, splendid.” he replied.
He glanced away, face hidden from Cho, and grimaced, mouthing ‘splendid’ in miserable mortification.
“Well, watch yourself on the stairs. A bit icy at the top.” Cho informed bashfully as she intended to make her leave.
“Okay. Thanks.” But as she smiled and turned, Harry pressed further. “Cho!”
He said this so forcefully, she nearly stumbled stopping. “Yes?”
“I just wondered if, maybe, you… wannagoballwime?”
“Sorry… I didn’t catch that?”
Harry collected himself with a deep inhale and repeated his question, “I wondered if you’d like to… to… go to the ball with me?”
Cho’s face fell grimly. “Oh. Harry. I’m sorry. But someone’s already asked me and I’ve said I’ll go. With him.”
“Oh. Well, good. I mean… okay. No problem.” Harry looked away, flexing his fingers within his mittens. Cho chewed her lip, frowning, then turned away. As she went, Harry exhaled, shaking his head, when-
“Harry?”
He looked up and saw her staring him straight in the eye.
“I really am… sorry.” She turned then, and Harry watched her dash back toward the distant castle, filling his footprints with her own.
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“Hermione! You’ll never believe what happened!” you rushed quickly to Hermione’s side the moment you entered the common room and found her in one of the comfortable arm chairs. She silently urged you to finish your statement.
“Dean Thomas asked me to the ball.” You bit your lip in excitement and Hermione beamed. “Congratulations! I knew you’d find a date in no time.” Hermione grinned.
From a distance, Harry could hear every word. His heart sank into his stomach. You were plan A, of course, but plan B ended up unfolding before he could stop himself. Now you weren’t a plan at all.
Suddenly, Ron tripped through the portrait hole, staggered across the room, and collapsed into a chair. He looked shell-shocked. Ginny, who’d accompanied him, fought hard to suppress a smile.
“What happened to you?” Harry asked curiously.
“He’s just asked out Fleur Delacour.” Ginny answered quickly.
“What?!”
“What’s she say?” Harry added before Hermione’s shock could be voiced further.
“No, of course.” Hermione guessed. But, in a pleat of doubt, “She did say no…?”
Ron shook his head.
“She said yes?!”
“Of course not! I don’t know what got into me. There she was… walking by… you know how I like it when they walk… and I couldn’t help it… it just sort of… slipped out.”
“Actually, he sort of screamed at her. It was a bit frightening.” Ginny grimaced.
“So what’d you do then?” Harry pushed.
“What else? I ran for it. I’m not cut out for this, Harry.” Ron groaned tiredly.
As they were all conversing, the Patil twins strode by, arm in arm with each other. They each glance at each other and in unison, “Hi Harry.” and they were gone as quickly as they had appeared.
Harry murmurs a half-hearted greeting before doing a double take in the direction they’d strode off in.
“Don’t worry. I think I’ve got an idea…”
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“Hello, boys.” The Patil twins greeted in unison.
Parvati and Padma, doubly delightful in shocking pink and bright turquoise respectively, waited below for their dates.
“Don’t you look… dashing.” Parvati’s eyes raked over Ron’s robes as she took Harry’s arm. Padma stared in open horror. Just then, McGonagall appeared, looking a bit flustered.
“There you are, Potter!” McGonagall called as she urgently made her way through the crowd to Harry and Ron.
“You and Miss Patil will wait here and enter with the other champions. Weasley…” she faltered, goggling at Ron’s robes, then collected herself.
“… you and Miss Patil may proceed inside, to the Great Hall.” she ushered them to the entrance.
“C'mon then.” As Ron dragged Padma off, she looked back desperately to her sister. Parvati just shook her head.
“We have a cousin who dresses like that.”
Just then, a gust of win stirred in the air and the Durmstrang and Beauxbaton students filed inside. As Fleur Delacour appeared, her silk wrap flew free, fluttering like a dove into the air, leading Harry’s eye to… Cho, who arrived hand in hand with Cedric Diggory.
“Omigod. She looks… Beautiful.” Parvati mumbled in disbelief.
Harry nodded glumly, staring at Cho, then realized Parvati was looking not at Cho, but a girl in blue robes.
Her hair was twisted in an elegant but messy knot with glittering butterfly barrettes littered amongst her locks to enhance the mystical facade, swan’s neck shining. She was simply ethereal. She was…
You.
“I know I’m late! Couldn’t figure out the button on the back of my dress.” You turned to demonstrate the intricate backing of your dress.
Harry remained speechless as you turned back around to face him with a wide smile. “You look handsome, my friend.” You slightly played with the collar of his dress robe, but Harry still didn’t utter a word.
“Close your mouth, Harry. We’re not a codfish.” You quoted one of your favorite Disney movies.
When he still didn’t reply, your teasing smile faltered for a worried expression. “Seriously, Harry. What’s wrong? Is my makeup smudged?” you patted your face to ensure that nothing was wrong.
“Oh! Nothing’s wrong… you just look…” Harry was quite unable to finish his sentence and you frowned.
“Is it that bad?” You looked down at your dress with your heart thumping in your chest.
“No, not at all. Quite the opposite actually… you’re stunning.” Harry’s eyes scanned you up and down. The smile returned to your features.
“Thank you… Hermione helped, of course.” You giggled bashfully.
“Well… erm, Dean is.. waiting for me so… I better go. I’m sure you’ll be expected to dance first.” You chewed the inside of your cheek anxiously, and Harry nodded.
“Right, yeah, you go. Have fun. I’ll see you later.” Harry’s arm was taken by Parvati. You nodded as well.
“See you.” You turned to disappear into the crowd to find your date. Harry watched you go longingly. Parvati smiled to herself, but said nothing nonetheless.
A path of light spilled from the Entrance Hall, revealing a darkened hall glimmering with icicles and mistletoe. The house tables had vanished, replaced by dozens of smaller ones, each glowing with lantern light around a central dance floor. Flitwick conducted a string quartet.
As the champions entered, applause arose. Fleur led the way, on the arms of a stunned-looking Ravenclaw boy (Roger Davies), while Harry and Parvati entered last, Parvati waving like a beauty queen. Harry scanned the room for Ron and found him, staring open-mouthed at Hermione as she passed with Krum.
“Is that Hermione Granger? With Viktor Krum?” Padma Patil was in shock.
“No. Absolutely not.” Ron denied with the curt shake of his head.
As the champions reached the dance floor, Flitwick’s baton froze in mid-air- bringing the hall to a hush.
“Take my waist.” Parvati urged forcefully when Harry didn’t move.
“Huh? Oh… right.” Harry places his hand on her waist and took her hand when Flitwick’s baton dropped and the waltz began.
“Go. Now!”
More out of fear than anything else, Harry took a step and then another. The music swelled. Fleur swept past, rigid as a queen. Next was Cho, dark eyes glimmering as they briefly met Harry’s own. Finally, Hermione- adrift in Krum’s strong arms- shot Harry a goofy, excited grin.
Dumbledore led McGonagall from the Tall Table and, with a short bow, swept her onto the floor, where they danced formally, beautifully. Quickly, the remainder of the staff paired off and joined them. Even Madame Maxime yielded to Hagrid and his horrible suit, though she casted her eyes askance while in his arms. Only Moody remained on the sidelines, eye whirling madly in time to the waltz.
Finally, the students converged, led by Neville, who glided like Astaire, much to the astonishment of his date- Ginny Weasley. Lost in the crush, Harry felt less self-conscious about his own clumsy feet and actually managed to smile.
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Later in the evening, a jagged razor burn of guitars, courtesy of the Weird Sisters, shattered the calm as the dance floor was now a mosh pit, hopping with bodies.
Fred’s hand reached up and snapped off one of the icicles and slipped it down the back of Angelina’s robes and she squealed, darting after him, passing Hermione and Krum. Hermione yelled above the din.
“Her-my-oh-nee!”
“Herm… own… ninny?”
She started to correct him, then shrugged. “Close enough.”
Harry and Ron sat watching grimly from the sidelines, while Padma and Parvati sat on opposite sides of them, arms crossed in aggravation. Ron eyed Krum lethally.
“Ruddy pumpkinhead, isn’t he?” he grumbled.
Harry’s eyes shifted from yours and Dean’s gyrating figures.
“Well, I don’t think it was the books that had him going to the library.”
A handsome Durmstrang boy approached Parvati, who looked ready to put a gun to her head.
“May I haff your arm?”
“Arm. Leg. I’m yours.” Parvati exited eagerly, following the boy at his heels.
Harry watched as Hermione pulled you from the crowd and your date, both with beautiful smiles as you approached the boys. Hermione dropped into Parvati’s vacant chair, flush from dancing. You stood awfully close to Harry, causing him to tense.
“Whew! Hot, isn’t it? Viktor and Dean have gone to get drinks. Care to join us?” Hermione asked cheerfully.
“No, we would not care to join you and… Viktor.” Ron spat his name like venom, and Hermione’s smile disappeared along with your own.
“What’s got your wand in a knot?” Hermione seemed offended.
“He’s from Durmstrang! You’re fraternizing with the enemy!” Ron accused loudly. You scoffed.
“The enemy? Who was it wanting his autograph? Besides, the whole point of the Tournament is international magical cooperation. To make friends.” Hermione clarified angrily.
“I think he’s got a bit more than friendship in mind.” Ron grumbled to himself. Your mouth dropped open.
“What are you suggesting?” your voice had dropped an octave, indicating your aggravation.
Harry spun around to face you, and instead of voicing his jealousy, voiced his frustration.
“It’s obvious, isn’t it? With Dean as well. You’re friends with Margaret Stone, aren’t you? That’s who Dean’s really after. Heard him talking about it the other day.” Harry huffed and sat back in his seat with crossed arms.
It wasn’t a total lie; Harry had heard Dean talking about Margaret Stone, but it wasn’t the other day. It was about a year ago.
You stood taken aback by Harry’s words. Not once had you heard him speak in this tone of voice, especially to you.
“W-… what do you mean?” You could feel your voice wavering as Hermione looked up at you.
“Y/N. He doesn’t mean it.” She urged. Harry stood.
“Well, of course I meant it! You’re easy enough to go out with and get closer to Stone without a second glance from anyone. Thought you were smarter than that. Aren’t you supposed to be like Hermione?” Harry’s arms remained crossed as he glared at you with fury.
But he quickly regretted his words when he watched as your eyes welled up with tears, threatening to spill over as you bit your bottom lip to keep from quivering.
“Y/N?”
You turned to see Dean with two drinks in hand, looking confused between you and Harry. “What’s going on?”
You choked on a sob that threatened to rip through your throat and dashed off, brushing past Dean on your way. Hermione glared at both Ron and Harry before jumping up to chase after you. “Y/N! That’s not true!” She called after you.
Dean spared Harry and confused glance before turning off in the same direction to follow you.
“Are you going to ask me to dance or not?” Padma asked Ron as she sulked.
“No.”
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As Ron and Harry exited, after the fiasco with Hermione, Ron broke off by himself in a rage. Harry found himself alone, Parvati no where to be found, not that he cared at all where she was.
He rounded the corner out of the Great Hall and found you, leaning against a wall and dabbing under your eyes so as to keep your tears from ruining your makeup.
The two of you make eye contact and you froze.
“Y/N-”
“No, don’t touch me.” you jerked away from his grip like you’d been burnt with a ragged breath, avoiding eye contact with him.
“I’m sorry, Y/N. I really am. I didn’t mean it like that…” Harry began slowly, gauging your reaction.
“Harry, you humiliated me in front of Ron and his date, your date, and Hermione, and might as well have embarrassed me in front of Dean.” You moved to cover your face with your hand to hide your expression.
Though Harry knows what he’d done, the thought still made his heart wrench. He’d made you cry, and he never wanted to be the cause of that, not now, not ever.
“That’s… not what I meant to do.” Harry sighed in spite of himself.
You looked away from dabbing under your eyes and up at Harry, watching as his face filled with genuine concern.
“What did you mean, then?” you sniffled, averting your eyes to the ground as you gripped your heels in your hand.
Harry was taken aback at your question. You were giving him a chance to explain himself. He wasn’t daft enough to waste this opportunity.
“I was just frustrated, and I wanted to look out for you… I didn’t want you to get hurt.” Harry’s shoulders slouched as he began to explain himself. You slowly gained the courage to glance up at him as he spoke.
You exhaled deeply, “Dean was overrated, anyway…” you sniffled again, a small smile spreading across your face.
Harry’s eyebrows furrowed with confusion. You sighed exaggeratedly and threw yourself at Harry and wrapped your arms around his neck, your cheek pressed against his shoulder.
Harry grunted and stumbled back from the impact, his arms wrapping themselves around your form. He let out a breath he didn’t know had been stuck in his throat at your action, but smiled nonetheless.
“This whole night has been a disaster. Take me home, Harry.” you buried your face into his robe as you let your eyes relax and your tired brain rest.
“Oh, um, okay…” Harry gave a brief stroke to your slightly more messy, but still gracefully decorated hair.
“But you’ve gotta help me out, here.” Harry chuckled as he attempted to lift you. You groaned and secured your arms more tightly around his neck and jumped, allowing Harry’s arm to fold under your legs and hoist you up, bridal style.
He managed to bring you the rest of the way to the common room, but you somehow managed to fall asleep on the journey. Harry chuckled to himself when he noticed you’d gone limp and your jaw had fallen slack.
Through that disaster of a night, Harry learned that all friends fight, but the ones who stayed true were the ones that persisted.
He only hoped that his friendship with you would be a result of persistence.
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Fifth Year
Harry quietly dismissed the weekly gathering of Dumbledore’s Army for the Christmas holiday. The progress they’d made was impeccable, incredible, and some might dare say, unfathomable.
Though, the tragic death of Cedric Diggory in the past year at Hogwarts had taken a tole on every student, especially one student in particular; Cho Chang.
She remained in the classroom, staring longingly at a cut-out clipping of Cedric’s portrait when he’d participated in the Triwizard Tournament that was taped to a musty mirror.
Harry approached her from behind, cautious so as to not startle her.
“Are you alright?” He asked carefully, keeping his voice as level as he could.
“I heard Umbridge gave you a rough time the other day.” He continued when he knew he had her attention.
“Yeah, I’m okay.” Cho glanced down at her scaring hand, matching many other trouble makers in the school.
“Anyways, it was worth it.” Her gaze returned to Cedric’s, the moving picture smiled back at them as if it knew they were watching it.
“It’s just… it’s just, learning all this… makes me wonder, whether he’d known it.” Cho observed the room carefully with a longing expression. Harry was quick to assure her.
“Cedric- Cedric did know this stuff. He was really good. It’s just… Voldemort was better.” Harry decided on.
Cho cast her eyes down to the floor, then back up at Harry. “You’re a really good teacher, Harry.” In response, Harry smiled shortly.
“I’ve never been able to stun anything before.” Cho grinned cheekily
A faint rustling came from above the two, causing Cho to look up curiously. What she spotted was mistletoe, curiously growing from the ceiling above them with haste.
“Mistletoe.” Cho whispered quietly. Harry was still fascinated by the plant’s growth above them.
His eyes returned to Cho’s face, but couldn’t think of anything worth saying. “Probably full of Nargles, though.” He blurted.
“What are Nargles?” Cho asked with confusion. Harry shrugged.
“No idea.” They wasted no more time and brought themselves together to seal the silence in a tender kiss. Harry’s first, it happened to be.
“Sorry to barge in, but I forgot my-”
You stopped dead in your tracks when you found the couple snogging in the middle of the practice room. You found yourself speechless as your heart shattered into thousands of pieces at the sight.
Harry and Cho separated immediately when they both acknowledged your presence. “Oh… Y/N.” Harry scratched the nape of his neck and avoided eye contact with you.
“Dear Merlin, I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt.” you were quick in putting up a facade of nonchalance as you frantically searched for the tie you’d recently shed when practicing spells with the group.
“It’s alright… no harm done.” Harry threw a worried glance in Cho’s direction as you find your tie.
“This was all I came for. Again, I apologize for the disturbance- I’ll be going now- Oh!” in your haste to back away, you’d knocked yourself into the wall near the entrance. You laughed nervously and rubbed the back of your head to soothe it.
“My bad, wasn’t looking where I was going. I’m leaving now.” You spun around on your heel and rounded the corner quickly, sprinting down the hallway and back to the common room as quickly as you could carry yourself.
As both Harry and Cho watched you disappear, Harry let out a long sigh. Cho turned to him. “Was that Y/N L/N?” she asked curiously. As Harry began to pack his things, he nodded.
“Yeah… it was.” Harry nodded towards the entrance as he stowed his wand away. Cho nodded grimly.
“She seemed upset.” Cho acknowledged as she watched Harry move about the room.
“Did she?” Harry questioned. Although, he had noticed your odd behavior but thought nothing of it.
“Yes, quite jealous, actually.” Cho hummed in thought.
Harry pondered that a moment. Jealous? You? Of him? Impossible.
“Yeah, right.” Harry scoffed. Though he didn’t mean anything by it, of course.
“I always thought you liked her.” Cho carefully worded her statement as she watched Harry’s back tense.
“I guess.” Harry shrugged shortly. His tone was becoming curt and short.
“Then… why are you here with me? Not going after her?” Cho gestures to the entrance to the classroom. Harry follows her gesture with his eyes and contemplated this a moment.
The next thing he knew, he’d thrown his bag over his shoulder and quickly departed with a “thank you” thrown in Cho’s direction as he hurried away.
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Sixth Year
Harry peered through ripples of an imperfect windowpane in the Weasley’s Burrow, studying the others down below. A floorboard creaked. He turned and watched you emerge into the light, in a robe, twisting your wet hair into a towel.
“Everyone gone to bed?” You asked nonchalantly as you approached Harry.
“Soon.” Harry nodded.
“I don’t sleep these days. So I wash my hair. Silly, right?” you giggled at yourself, folding the towel over your arm
Harry just stared at you, the air prickling with silence. You eyed him knowingly.
“Happy Christmas, Harry.” You grinned sweetly.
Down below, Lupin continued to peer into the reeds. His pupils contracted.
“Sweetheart…” Tonks approached him.
“There’s someone out there. I can smell him. There’s more than one-”
“Suddenly, throughout the reeds, torches blazed.
Back on the second floor, the rippled window behind Harry blushed with light. Your eyes shifted from Harry to the trees beyond.
"Oh my god…”
Harry turned, his breath fogging the windowpane as, far below, flames snuck out of the reeds and slithered toward the house. Bellatrix emerged, peering up through the darkness toward Harry’s silhouette, a mad grin on her face. As she shrieked eerily, his eyes flashed with hatred.
Harry burst through the front door, wand draw, and pelted toward Bellatrix. She grinned, turned, and vanished into the reeds.
“Harry, no!” Arthur Weasley called urgently as he disappeared into the reeds.
Flames raced up the porch steps and climbed the walls of the house. Lupin drew his wand and raced after Harry.
“Remus!” Tonks called.
Ron, Fred, and George appeared and joined Arthur as he dashed toward the smoking marsh. Arthur glanced back as you emerged.
“Y/N, stay with Molly!”
Without hesitation, you raced for the reeds.
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Harry careened through the marsh, reeds flashing past, then spied Bellatrix. She grinned, looking like a crazed wood nymph, then flitted off, her laughter mocking him. As he pursued, fire snaked through the reeds toward him.
Fred, George, Ron, and Arthur fanned out, running full-out, their feet kicking up sparks as shadows splintered throughout the reeds. It was like chasing ghosts.
You raced through the reeds, (h/c) hair gleaming.
Bellatrix lead Harry on, grinning madly.
You came dashing to a halt, chest heaving as you peered into the smoking marsh. A huge figure quivered through a veil of smoke. You eyes shifted, saw Bellatrix racing forward through the reeds, then shifted back as the veil of smoke evaporated and revealed… Greyback.
Bellatrix made an odd, clicking noise, like a signal, and Greyback edged forward, sweeping away reeds in front of him and revealing…
… Harry as he pelted forward.
“No, Harry! It’s a trap!”
Harry faltered, looking toward your voice and spied Greyback. Bellatrix stopped dead, wheeled in her tracks, and seeing you, shrieked with rage. Raising her wand, she fired a bolt of red light which exploded in a shower of sparks around you. You shrieked and ducked, but fired back and wheeled away, flashing through the reeds and coming face to face with-
Greyback, sharp teeth glittering.
“Don’t you smell clean.”
Your breath caught in your throat as you stared up at him in pure terror.
Just then, a bolt of blue burst off Greyback’s back and he turned, seeing Harry standing several yards off. As Greyback gave a chase, you pelted after, both of your breaths shortening until…
Greyback rushed into a clearing, panting, glancing about.
Just then, twin bolts of light blasted from opposite sides of the clearing and Greyback was lifted in the air and slammed to the ground. As he regained his feet, he looked into the reeds and saw you and Harry, wands poised. He grinned… when Bellatrix’s odd, clicking signal carried through the night once again. Turning away, he disappeared.
You and Harry slowly stepped out of the reeds and stared at each other wordlessly. You let out a whimper and threw yourself at Harry, wrapping your arms around his middle in relief. He immediately reciprocated, his arms flying to hold you steady and stroke through your hair. It oddly reminded you of your experience at the Yule Ball, your mind flashing back to when you threw yourself at Harry after hearing his side of the story. You breathed a shaky sigh into his chest and Harry rested his chin atop your head.
Then… Ron, Fred, George, Arthur, and Lupin came thrashing into the clearing and stopped. All around them, the reeds smoked, the flames dying. Across the marsh, Bellatrix’s cackle rose briefly on the air- then all was quiet.
“You’re lucky you two weren’t killed.”
Hermione. Who else?
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Present…
This all brings you to today.
How did you end up sitting in Xenophilius Lovegood’s home, reading a children’s tail about the Deathly Hallows in the middle of what was supposed to be your seventh year at Hogwarts? You’ll never know.
You’ve all just finished listening to Hermione read from the Tales of the Beedle Bard children’s book of wizarding fairytales.
Xenophilius Lovegood stares out out the window. The sun has nearly vanished over the lip of the hill.
“Well, there you are. Those are the Deathly Hallows.”
Harry glances around the room, still confused.
“Sorry… I still don’t really understand.” He shrugs.
Lovegood turns and, taking quill and parchment, draws a straight vertical line…
“The Elder Wand…”
… then adds a circle on top of the line…
“The Resurrection Stone.”
… then encloses both in a triangle.
“The Cloak of Invisibility. Together… they make the Deathly Hallows. Together… they make one master of Death.”
The four of you stare at the symbol in disbelief.
“Mr. Lovegood, does the Peverell family have anything to do with the Deathly Hallows?” You asked curiously. You noticed Ron, Harry, and Hermione staring at you in curiosity.
“That was the name of the grave with the mark on it in Godric’s Hollow. Ignotus Peverell.” You clarified with detail.
“Ignotus and his brothers Cadmus and Antioch are thought to be the original owners of the Hallows and therefore the inspiration for the story.” Lovegood’s focus abruptly wavered, sadness in his eyes, then blinks, eyeing the tea kettle.
“Ah, but your tea’s grown cold. Excuse me, I’ll be right back.” Lovegood heads downstairs with the tea kettle in hand.
As Lovegood exits, Ron speaks. “Let’s get out of here once he’s back. I’m not touching this stuff, hot or cold.” Ron grimaced at his cup of half-empty tea. You nodded in agreement.
“Which one would you choose if you could? Of the Deathly Hallows?” Harry asks the group, lost in thought.
“It’s obvious, isn’t it?” Hermione glances around.
All four of your speak at once:
“The Wand.”
“The Cloak.”
“The Cloak.”
“The Stone.”
You all glance at each other, amused. You and Hermione share a look, knowingly. You’d each picked the cloak for a reason.
“You’re supposed to say the Cloak, but who wants to spend all day being invisible? Dead boring if you ask me. But an unbeatable wand!” Ron grinned.
“Its owner grew drunk with power and was murdered.” Hermione raises an eyebrow at Ron accusingly.
“Yeah, but imagine what a short wicked life you’d lead.” Ron counters.
Hermione rolls her eyes. “Why the Stone, Harry?” she directs her question to Harry now.
“Well, you could bring people back, couldn’t you? Mad-Eye. Dumbledore. Sirius. Anybody.” Harry shrugged.
“But according to the story, they don’t want to come back. It’s all rubbish, anyway. There’s no such thing as the Deathly Hallows.” Hermione’s counter is gentle.
“But I have one. The Invisibility Cloak my father left me.” Harry reminds quickly.
“There have always been Cloaks-”
“Not like Harry’s. I’ve seen a fair few. Dad used to bring home the ones the Ministry confiscated from petty thieves and the like. They always got holes or tears. Harry’s is different. It’s perfect.” Ron explains before Hermione can finish.
“And I think I’ve actually held the Resurrection Stone in my hands, that night in Dumbledore’s office when he showed me the ring he’d destroyed, the Horcrux. It had a symbol on it. Now I think it was the mark of the Hallows.
The four of you stand silently when Lovegood returns.
"Mr. Lovegood. Thank you, sir-”
“You forgot the water.” Ron points to the tea kettle.
“The water?” Lovegood inquires.
“For the tea.” Ron raises an eyebrow as if it were obvious.
“Did, didn’t I? How silly of me?” Lovegood breaks out into a nervous smile.
“No matter, sir. We really ought to be go-”
“No, you mustn’t!” Lovegood panics, his hands searching for any type of purchase on any surface he can find.
“Sir?” Harry questions.
“You’re my only hope. They were angry, you see, about what I’d been writing, so they took her. They took my Luna…” Lovegood’s eyes find Harry with malicious intent. “But it’s really you they want…”
“Who took her, sir?” You try gently.
Hermione eyes the print press. A copy of the Quibbler lies stuck under a roller. She reaches out and pulls it free, the ink streaking over the cover, over Harry’s face and the blazing headline: UNDESIRABLE NUMBER #1.
“Him. Surely you call him You-Know-Who. But his real name is of course… Voldemort.”
As if on cue, instantly, out the window, figures on broomsticks appeared in the sky, getting directly toward the house. As you, Harry, Ron, and Hermione hit the floor, ropes of light ricochet off the windowsill. The printing press explodes, raining Quibblers everywhere, like a flock of doves, smoking with flames. Lovegood waves madly from the window.
“Stop! I’ve got him-”
Lovegood is blasted off his feet by a stunning spell so great the chain around his neck flies across the room and settles at your feet. You glance down, watching the symbol of the Deathly Hallows dissolve like mercury, then looked up, seeing Lovegood streak out the door.
“Ron, Harry, Y/n! Take my hand!”
You, Harry, and Ron begin to crawl on your knees toward Hermione when another volley of spells ricochet about the room and- ping!- strike the Gurdyroot teapot. As Hermione watches, it flies into the air, tumbling end over end toward the Erumpent Horn. Harry’s hand closes on hers, then Ron’s, you reach out and…
… the teapot strikes the Erumpent Horn.
There is a colossal explosion. The second floor of the black cylinder ruptures. Quibblers belch into the air like confetti as Lovegood narrowly escapes and the Death Eaters are engulfed and you, Harry, Ron, and Hermione…
♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡ … tumble and roll to your feet, barely visible in the darkness.
“That treacherous old bleeder! Is there no one we can trust?!” Ron grumbles as he dusts himself off.
“They’ve kidnapped Luna because he supported Harry. He was just desperate.” You explain softly.
Ron says nothing, then spits, clearing the grit from his teeth and peers toward the river. Unlike the raging force it was the last time you were here, it is a little more than a trickle now. The trees are eerily quiet.
“I’ll do the enchantments.”
Ron takes out his wand… when you raise your hand, stopping him. You eyes rise. Your breath catches. Ron, Harry, and Hermione look. Clinging to the branches of the trees above, almost as if part of the trees themselves, are…
Snatchers.
A wand blooms above and illuminates the face of Scabior. Your red scarf, now faded and filthy, dangles from his neck. He presses it to his grimy nose, inhales, and grins.
“Hello, beautiful.”
♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡ The four of you dash through the trees.
You flicker through the trees, swift as the wind, as Scabior pursues you.
Harry slashes through the river, looks up, and sees a Snatcher leap across the divide from one tree to another.
Ron pounds through thick brush, over a fallen tree.
Hermione expertly avoids sticks and stones covering the forest floor, her focus unwavering.
The forest grows more dense, the shadows thicken. Spells splinter through the trees, ropes of light lace the night.
Hermione stumbles, but regains her footing and finds herself in a clearing. You come along not long after, glancing at her with panic. Another figure pelts towards the two of you: Harry.
You all freeze briefly, then the clearing explodes with light as spells ricochet. They hit the ground. You hear the snatchers closing in.
You look to Harry. The tip of your wand glows and your face blooms in the darkness, looking mildly demonic. You reach out, strip his glasses from his face, then point your wand… at him. A burst of white light strikes him in the eyes. As your wand goes dark…
… he is flying toward a fortress, gliding around the high walls, up to the topmost window of the highest tower. He passes through the window- little more than a slit- and…
…finds a skeletal figure lying beneath a ragged blanket. The figure stirs, looks up, and grins with broken teeth. It is the young man- the thief- grown old. Grindelwald.
“Ah, Tom, I thought you would come one day. But surely you must know I no longer have what you seek.”
A shadow- Voldemort’s- falls across Grindelwald.
“If not you, then who?”
“You’re so innocent, Tom. Like a schoolboy. There’s so much you don’t understand.”
“Tell me, Grindelwald. Tell me where to find it! Tell me who possesses it! The name, Grindelwald! The name!”
“Can’t you guess, Tom? It lies within him, of course. Buried within the earth. It is he who possesses it, even in death. Your old friend and mine… Dumbledore.”
Harry blinks and in a swollen blur, peers at you and whispers quickly.
“They exist. The Hallows.”
You and Hermione look at him expectantly. He nods, his face shrouded in shadow, barely visible.
“But he only wants the one, the last one. That’s what he’s been looking for.”
“What are you saying?”
“He knows where it is, You-Know-Who. He’ll have it by the end of the night. He’s found the Elder Wand.”
As you and Hermione stare in stunned disbelief, figures emerge from the trees. Ron is shoved to the ground next to them. Scabior strips you, Hermione, and Harry of your wands.
“Don’t touch her!” Harry exclaims urgently. A fist hits Harry hard. It’s Greyback.
“Stop it!” You gasp desperately.
“Your boyfriend’ll get worse than that if he doesn’t behave, lovely.” Scabior grins misshapenly.
Scabior paints your face with light then casts it on Harry. Harry peers up, his eyes swollen to slits, his face horribly misshapen.
“What happened to you, ugly?” Scabior grimaces.
Harry’s hand finds his face, feeling the lumps.
“What’s your name?”
“Dudley. Vernon Dudley.” Harry blurts quickly.
“Check the list. And you, ginger?”
“Stan Shunpike.” Ron grumbles.
“Like 'ell you are. We know skinny Stan. Try again.” Scabior scoffs.
Greyback, his boot to Ron’s neck, presses harder.
“Weasley… Barney Weasley.” Ron makes up the name on the spot.
“Weasley, eh? Wouldn’t be related to that blood traitor Arthur Weasley, would you?”
“Piss off! Arthur Weasley’s ten times the wizard you are!” Ron struggles.
“Worth ten times you if I can find him. Wasn’t you that tipped him off, was it?” Scabior growls. Ron stays mute. Scabior turns to Hermione.
“You?” He asks quickly.
“Penelope Clearwater. Half-blood.” Hermione struggles in the snatcher’s grip.
Scabior turns to you with a sickly sweet grin.
“How 'bout you, lovely? What do they call you…?”
You jerk away from his finger under your chin and glare.
“Lavender. Brown. Pure blood.” you whisper quietly.
Scabior strokes the nape of your neck, then takes your hair in hand, sniffing it. You groan at his proximity.
“You smell like vanilla, Lavender. I think you’re going to be my favorite.” He grins.
“There’s no Vernon Dudely on 'ere.” A snatcher waves a book in the air.
Reluctantly, Scabior turns from you to Harry.
“Hear that, ugly? The list says you’re lying. How come you don’t want us to know who you are? Hm?”
“The list is wrong. I told you who I am-”
Scabior puts a finger to his lips, silencing Harry, his wand probing Harry’s face more closely.
“Change of plans, boys. We won’t be taking this lot to the Ministry.”
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Scabior and the others escort you, Harry, Ron, and Hermione past the yew hedges of the Malfoy Manor. You eye the white peacock, looking like a ghostly lawn ornament. Harry whispers to you.
“What did you put on me?” He inquires.
“A Stinging Jinx.” You inform quietly.
“How long will it last?”
“Not long.”
Harry glances down and sees his glasses cupped in your palm. As he slips them into his pocket, the group suddenly slows. Up ahead, on the other side of the gate, Bellatrix, Lucius, and Narcissa approach. Scabior grabs Harry’s arm and pushes his face up to the iron bars.
Bellatrix steps close. “Show me.”
Scabior reaches out his dirty fingers and pushes Harry’s hair roughly off his forehead.
Bellatrix shines her wand. Despite the swelling, one intriguing feature can be seen: a scar, in the shape of a lightning bolt. Bellatrix studies it long and hard… then smiles.
♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡
As Bellatrix leads the procession inside, she speaks to Narcissa.
“Get Draco.”
Narcissa eyes her sister briefly, warily, then strides off, toward the brightly-lit room ahead, where her husband Lucius stands, cradling a nearly-empty wine glass.
“Why Draco?” Lucius inquires. Narcissa passes her husband without a word.
“Just sit back and watch, Lucius. Hm? Pour yourself another glass of wine.” As she passes, she flicks her finger off the rim of his glass.
Bellatrix turns, eyeing you, Harry, Ron, and Hermione.
“Where’d you find them?” She begins.
“In the North Forest.” Scabior answers.
Wormtail quietly enters the room. As Harry eyes him, Bellatrix pauses, studying his scar again.
“Lovely scarf, Scabior. Though I’m not sure it’s your color.” Bellatrix teases.
“It’s not mine.”
“You don’t say.” Her eyes slide, catching him looking to you.
“Fancy her, do you, Scabior? Can’t say I blame you. Maybe we’ll work out a little reward for you, hm? That is, assuming all is as it appears. Ah, Draco. Come here, darling.”
From the shadows at the far end of the room, Draco separates from Narcissa and steps cautiously forward.
“My friends here say they’ve got Harry Potter. Seeing as he’s an old school chum of yours, I thought you could confirm the fact for us.”
Draco stares at Harry.
“Well…?” Bellatrix urges.
“I can’t… I can’t be sure.” Draco grimaces. Lucius steps forward, wine glass sloshing.
“Look close, Draco. If we’re the ones who hand Potter over to the Dark Lord, everything will be forgiven. Do you understand-”
“Now, we won’t be forgetting who actually caught him, I hope, Mr. Malfoy?” Scabior reminds, quietly menacing.
“Of course not.” Bellatrix’s eyes harden. “Narcissa. Tend to your husband.”
Lucius staggers back nervously next to his wife.
“Don’t be shy, sweetheart. Get up nice and close.” Bellatrix nudges Draco forward until he’s only inches from Harry.
“What’s wrong with his face?” Draco grimaces as he gets a closer look at Harry.
“Yes, what is wrong with his face, Scabior?” Bellatrix cranes her neck to look up at the snatchers.
“He came to us that way. I reckon he picked it up in the forest.” Scabior shrugged.
“Or ran into a Stinging Jinx.”
You feel your heart clench as you cast your eyes downward. Bellatrix notices your destress and her eyes flash, stepping up close to you.
“Was it you, dearie? Give me her wand. We’ll see what the last spell was.”
You’re alarmed as the Snatcher steps forward.
“What is that?” Bellatrix’s tone is quietly murderous. She pushes past Scabior and Greyback and steps before another Snatcher.
Your beaded purse dangles from one hand. In the other, he holds… the Sword of Gryffindor.
“It was in her bag when we searched her. Reckon it’s mine now.”
Bang! Quick as lightning, Bellatrix stuns the Snatcher and catches the sword as he drops. Scabior wheels.
“Are you mad?!” Bang! Bellatrix drops Scabior to his knees before his wand escapes his cloak. He bellows in fury.
“How dare you! Release me, woman!”
Bellatrix stares at him, eyes full of fire, then flicks her wand as he slumps forward, wincing.
“Go. GO!”
Scabior eyes her resentfully, then exits with Greyback an the others. Bellatrix turns.
“Wormtail. Put these three in the cellar. I want to have a little conversation with this one. Girl to girl.”
“No!” Hermione steps forward and covers your body with her own, staring Bellatrix down with confidence. Bellatrix merely smirks.
“Fine. Put the boys in the cellar, then. We’ll have a girl talk.”
As Wormtail jerks them away, Harry’s eyes flash with panic and meet yours. You mouth, “It’s okay.”
♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡
Wormtail prods Harry and Ron down a steep flight of stairs and slams the door. Ron throws himself against it and turns to Harry.
“Harry! What’re we going to do? We can’t just leave them alone with her!”
“Ron…? Harry…?”
Harry peers into the small, shadow space below and senses movement.
“Luna…?” ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡
Bellatrix twirls a silver dagger in her fingers.
“This sword is meant to be in my vault at Gringotts. How did you get it?” Bellatrix pins you to the floor as Hermione lays motionless beside you, watching helplessly.
You draw in a shaky, sobbing breath as you try to regain your composure as you cry out. “I didn’t take it!” You exclaim desperately.
“Liar!” Bellatrix moves to your arm and slices open the skin in a rhythmic fashion, carving a word out of your skin. You let out a scream in agony and struggle in her grip, shrieking as your skin burns.
♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡
Harry eyes Ollivander cautiously, when Bellatrix’s voice echoes through the vent.
“I’m going to ask you once again: what else did you and your friends take from my vault?!”
Harry’s heart nearly shatters when he hears your sobbing response.
“I told you! I don’t know what you’re talking-” you scream in pain. Harry slams his fist against the wall and turns.
♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡
Hermione whimpers as she watches Bellatrix’s use of the Cruciatus curse on you for answers. You let our a piercing wail of anguish as she strikes you again.
“Stop it, please.” Hermione lets out a gentle sob and whisper as she watches you struggle to keep sane.
♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡
Quickly, cautiously, Harry and Ron, now brandishing Wormtail’s wand, pad toward the main room as Dobby, the newest arrival, slips off in another direction. As Ron steps past the lifeless Snatcher without a glance, Harry hesitates and glances down.
Something flutters weakly in the Snatcher’s pocket. The tip of a golden wing. Harry crouches and looks; it’s the Snitch.
“Sss.”
Harry looks up and sees Ron gesturing for him. Quickly, he takes the Snitch and slips it into his pocket.
Harry joins Ron as the watch Bellatrix, who comes into view, towering over Griphook, who holds the sword, studying it. You lie at Bellatrix’s feet. Seeing you, Harry begins to lurch forward. Ron restrains him.
“Well?”
“I left Gringotts employ many weeks ago, but when I was last in your vault, the sword was there.”
Hermione studies the two and then watches as a strand of Bellatrix’s hair drifts free and, as if in a dream, floats through the air…
“Perhaps it just walked out on its own then.”
“There is no place safer than Gringotts, Madam Lestrange.”
… and catches on Hermione’s shirt.
“Liar! You can’t deceive me!” Bellatrix slashes the dagger across Griphook’s cheek and a deep gash opens. He barely flinches, the hint of a smile on his lips. Bellatrix looks mildly unnerved by his reaction.
“Consider yourself lucky, Goblin. The same won’t be said for this one.” Bellatrix poises the dagger over you and pushes your limp body with her pointed heel. You whimper at the contact to your sore body and flip over at her command.
“Like hell!”
Bellatrix wheeled, seeing Harry pelting forward.
“Expelliarmus!”
Bellatrix’s dangling wand shoots free and tumbles end over end, right into Harry’s hand.
“Stupefy!”
Lucius Malfoy drops instantly, his wine glass shattering in a burgundy bloom on the hearth. Narcissa and Draco draw their wands. Jets of light spray across the room.
Hermione had been snatched up by Ron at this point, but no one was able to get to you.
“Stop or she dies!”
Harry, Ron, and Hermione freeze and see you leaning limply against Bellatrix, the dagger at your throat.
“Drop your wands.” Bellatrix commands.
Harry stands rigidly, staring balefully at Bellatrix. She presses the dagger into your neck enough for a small cut.
“Ah!” you exclaim painfully.
“I said drop them!”
“All right!” Harry grunts angrily.
Ron flings away Wormtail’s wand, Harry drops Bellatrix’s.
“Pick them up, Draco. Now! Well, well, look what we have here. Harry Potter. All bright, shiny and new again. Just in time for the Dark Lord.”
Harry glances in the mirror opposite and sees that the stinging jinx is wearing off.
“Call him, Draco.”
Draco hesitates. But Lucius doesn’t, pulling up his sleeve and touching his finger to the Dark Mark on his forearm. Harry’s scar constricts and he grimaces in agony. Bellatrix cackles maniacally, her knife pressed against the tender flesh of your neck. A bead of blood bubbles on the blade and then… and grinding noise in heard. Harry glances up and sees the chandelier begin to tremble. As the tinkle of glass fills the room, Bellatrix stares directly upward, watching as…
… the chandelier bursts free of the ceiling and plummets. Bellatrix bolts and you stagger clear, falling into Harry’s arms. His arms immediately reciprocate and you fall into that familiar memory once again. Your body is sore and limp, but there’s no where you would rather be than in his arms at this moment.
Griphook grabs the sword as glass explodes in razor-sharp slivers, Draco screams and covers his bloody face. Harry wrests the blood-soaked wands from his hands after transferring you to Ron and Hermione and, wheeling, points all three at Lucius.
“Stupefy!”
Lucius flies off his feet and drops in a heap.
“You dirty little monkey! You could have killed me!”
Harry turns and sees Bellatrix raging at Dobby. The elf stands fearlessly across from her, defiant.
“Dobby never meant to kill. Dobby only meant to maim… or seriously injure.
"For God’s sake, Cissy, you’ve got a wand! Use it!”
Narcissa hesitates. Crack!- Dobby waves his little fist and Narcissa’s wand flies from her hand.
“How dare you take a witch’s wand! How dare you defy your masters!”
“Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf, and Dobby has come to save Harry Potter and his friends!”
Harry tosses Ron and wand, grabs your beaded bag, and joins the others in the center of the room.
“Give the Dark Lord our regards.” You call out weakly with a cheeky smile.
Harry almost smiles back at you. You always have to have the last word.
His hand closes on Dobby’s and the drawing room begins to spin. Bellatrix’s face twists into an ugly blur. Her arm rises, dagger in hand. There is a flash of silver. Then all goes black for a long time.
Then…
… with a great WHOOSH, Harry and the others tumble onto solid earth and hear the crash of waves.
As Harry staggers to his feet as the stars whirl above him. He sees he is on a cliff overlooking a dark sea.
Ron holds Hermione gently. Tears sting her eyes.
You feel a sharp pain in your stomach and your breath hitches.
You can already begin to feel life leaving your body as you become numb to the pain.
“It’s all right, Hermione. You’re safe. We’re all safe.” Harry begins to assure as he searches for you.
She doesn’t respond, nor Ron. Then Harry realizes they are looking past him, even Dobby and Griphook, the sword hanging limply in his hand.
Harry turns.
You stand alone, a queer smile on your face, hand resting just below your chest, the hilt of Bellatrix’s dagger protruding between your fingers.
Hermione opens her mouth and lets out a blood-curdling scream at the sight of you. She covers her mouth with one hand and tears spill from her eyes as Ron holds her tightly.
“Y/N… no…”
As Harry rushes to you, you crumple in his arms, your eyes rolling up to the stars.
“It’s okay… here… just hold on, Y/N. I’ll fix you- Hermione- her bag- Essence of Dittany- something… Hermione! Help me!”
Harry is desperate now as he watches you become more and more lifeless in his arms. He can’t watch you go now, not like this. Not when they are so incredibly close.
Hermione merely stands, tears streaking her cheeks.
“Don’t worry about me, Harry.” You manage. Harry’s face contorts in a sob.
“No, but I have to worry about you! You’re dying! Please… help.” Harry searches frantically for anything.
“I would say something witty… but my mind is blank.” you manage a chuckle as you reach up to grip Harry’s arm. Harry yanks your hand and brings it up to his cheek and nuzzles himself against your palm with closed eyes.
“Hey, look at me.” You stroke his cheek the best you can manage. Harry opens his eyes and stares down into your paling eyes, his own flooding with tears.
“You’re gonna be alright, I promise.” you whisper gently.
“I never meant for you to get caught up in all of this. I promise.” Harry draws in a shaky breath and squints his eyes shut.
It has to be a dream, he’s going to wake up any moment to you shaking him awake in the tent and telling him it was just another one of his nightmares.
But when he opens his eyes, you’re still lying limp in his arms, the dagger in your body and the life leaving your eyes.
“I wanted to, Harry. It was all worth it. For you.” Your smile is sad as you watch the emotional pain that wrenches his heart.
“Please don’t leave me… I’m in love with you…” Harry sobs desperately.
You can’t tell if it’s the dagger in your chest, or if your heart palpitates from his words. That was all you ever wanted to hear. Those words from him and him alone.
“I’m in love with you too, you twat.” you giggle. Harry’s frown twitches into a sad smile for only a moment, before he regains his awareness of the weight of the situation.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.” he sniffles pathetically.
“Me too.” Your hand on his cheek begins to grow numb and limp, if it weren’t for Harry gripping it to his face.
You use your last burst of strength and wind your hand around his neck and tug him down to your level, pressing your lips to his in your first and final kiss. Harry wastes no time and reciprocates, only separating from you when he needs air to breathe, but keeps the proximity between your faces.
“Take care of them for me, yeah?” You whisper as your eyes become hooded.
“W-what? No! Y/N, please! We’re going to fix you, I promise, I’ll-”
But he stops himself when he notices that your eyes have fluttered shut and your hand falls limp around his neck. He’s close enough to your face to feel your breathing has stopped and your body has gone mostly cold.
“I’m so sorry.” Harry cradles your head against his neck and lets out heart-wrenching sobs unabashedly.
Hermione hides her face in Ron’s neck as she cries, and Ron sheds tears as he watches his best friend cradle your limp body.
They never thought it would come to this.
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heyyourcool · 3 months
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My statements may be all over the place but bare with me 😭
This is a genuine question. What makes (some of) y'all consider one piece to be 'the best piece of media' or 'the best anime'? Or something along that line? Or even consider Oda 'the goat'? In my opinion, one piece is just like any other anime; It has an interesting lore but a mediocre plot. One piece also has things that shouldn't be normalized? Like boa having a crush on luffy (who was 17 while she's probably in her 30's), or that soldier (dressrosa arc, can't remember his name) literally having a crush on a 15 year old and her father allowing him to marry her??? And Oda thinks having Sanji simp for every girl he sees is funny, when really it's plain annoying. He throws himself at vivi who was 16 at the time and carrot? I know she's still a teenager and he still proceeds to act all 'carrot seannnnnnn~' to her. It's not funny. It's annoying. And let's not even forget that Oda actually supported that one mangaka (I'm not too sure on who the mangaka is, but I've heard the creator done some terrible stuff and Oda still (allegedly 🥴) supported him or something). And come one.... We understand there are skinny girls in the world, we love them, but alla them build the same? They're either skinny or too skinny (you can make the women the same size (or whatever) as the men, it's not unattractive, it's reality). And they're all copy and paste too. They either look like nami or they look like robin. I also came to realize after watching Oden's flashback in the wano arc, that the woman if one piece tend to be the one making speeches, or the ones that encourages their male counterparts (if you understand?) and the men are the ones fighting most of the time. idk. it's just something I came to notice.
I don't have anything else to say. Some were things I've hated while watching one piece and other were actually statements as why you guys consider one piece and Oda the best of the best.
Edit: I do enjoy one piece. It was just something that came to mind. It's not the best in my opinion, but it is fun to watch.
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