#but this support has filled me with comfort and relief and even determination to continue creating

[shadowusagiart]

I hav no clue how modern Tumlbr works so I have been ass at saying this but!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you all for all of the love on my fanart pieces!!!! 🥹

[mutigold]

∞ teacher’s pet — i.n.

summary: in which the top student fails a test and gets extra help from his favorite professor.

pairing: student!jeongin x teacher!reader

genre: college!au

warning: sub!jeongin, dom!reader, pet play, noona kink, exhibitionism, handjob, ear licking, humiliation, quirofilia, seduction, he still has his braces.

word count: 1.9k

authors note: i really don’t know where this idea came from, but all i know is subby jeongin = 🤤. thank you for supporting me! watching people like my little writings really make my day.. hope y’all enjoy this <3. stream “Going Dumb”!

“would anyone like to explain what it means to be dependent on an organism?”

jeongin’s eyes concentrated on you, as he listened to your voice encompassing the leveled platform. today’s lecture was based on the living organisms in the world and you seemed to be determined for everyone to learn the curriculum.

however, jeongin could not focus on anything except your figure. you were wearing a white skin-tight turtleneck and black formal pants that emphasize your ass. all topped off with a large suit jacket and black louis vuitton heels.

it overall made his heart jump for joy just enjoying the view.

he thought about how those heels would look wrapped around his waist as he pounds into you; screaming his name. or maybe how your tiny hand would slip around his throat as he begs for your come.

“mr. yang?”

jeongin quickly snaps out of his trance to hear you calling his name. and not in the way he wanted.

you looked up at him with sad eyes, upset at him for not paying attention to your favorite lesson. “what’s going through that head yours? is it more important than organisms?”

he quickly fixed his posture, shaking his head rapidly, and responded with, “n—no, i’m sorry noona. i just was thinking too hard about something. i’ll promise to listen from now on.”

you hummed with caution, continuing the biological lecture. the student sighs gratefully for you letting him go off easily and tries to at least take some notes.

“yo, i.n. you okay?” a familiar voice whispered.

jeongin turns to see his two close friends, seungmin and felix, staring down at him in question. “yeah, you seem a little off today.”

confirming he says, “uh. y—yeah; i’m okay.”

“mhmm. okay with staring professor y/n down huh?” felix smirks.

the heat on i.n. 's cheeks becomes noticeable when hearing about his staring. he then tries to ignore the statement by writing his name and the current date in his notebook.

“leave him alone felix. he’s just probably having some problems with the lesson; you should perhaps ask noona for help.” seungmin tries to intervene.

“yeah; i mean, maybe noona can also help you with other problems. if you know what i mean.” felix grins bumping jeongin’s arm.

“f—felix!”

“boys?! care to tell us what is so interesting other than my lesson?” your voice suddenly booms throughout the room. jeongin jumps at your tone and begins to apologize again once making you soften.

“that’s alright, but please pay attention. oh, and jeongin, stay after class for a few minutes to speak with me.”

he didn’t know what to think at that moment; with felix oohing in one of his ears and seungmin trying to shush him in his other or the fact that you wanted to talk to privately.

alone, with no one around, made his mind officially shut down.

“you wanted to speak with me noona?”

you shifted around to see jeongin’s stiff form; then took note of how nervous he looked and gave him a light smile. “hey, kiddo. i just wanted to see how you were doing lately.” you wished to see some type of relief release through him.

but unfortunately, that didn’t happen.

he still looked kind of anxious to speak with you, letting you know how intimidating you seemed. “hey it’s all good, you're not in trouble or anything, i promise. i’ve noticed how you’ve been acting recently in my class and how your scores dropped a little,” you reassured.

“ai! i’m so sorry noona!”

you giggle at the student’s consistent apologies. in your mind, you thought how cute he was; like a puppy aching to gain approval from its owner.

maybe you could make him as your puppy and work hard for that admiration.

immediately, you shake your head from the naughty images. ever since the semester started a few months ago, your thoughts almost ran around yang jeongin.

how his pretty smile, concealed by clear braces, shined at your speaking, how his crescent-shaped eyes followed your every move; making you feel sexy, how large and veiny his arms grew over time within the season, etc.

“that’s alright, jeongin. i just want you to feel comfortable in my lectures. how about this, you and i have a session later this evening to cover the material for the next exam. what do you think pup’?” you offering, accidentally calling him by the pet name you gave him.

after catching the tiny nickname, jeongin clumsy drops his possessions while feeling something swell in his pants. he begins to overthink the word. pup’? why did that sound so nice coming out of your mouth? and how was he gonna hide the fact that his dick got hard in the middle of their conversation?

“i–i’m sorry!”

“oh! no worries hun! here; let noona help you out.”

you instantly proceeded over, bent down, and gathered i.n.’s school objects. starting with some of his blue pens, his macbook, and then his green two-subject notebook. “n–noona! i got the notebook, it’s okay.” jeongin stuttered.

it was almost like he was trying hard to hide something in the notebook, and suddenly it all made sense as it opened to the front page.

yang y/n. it was his surname combined with your first name.

it seemed as if time swiftly froze with silence when discovering the secret. however, it didn’t bother you essentially much as jeongin thought it would have had. “aw, pup’, this is cute. yang y/n has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”

the air that was in jeongin’s lungs properly stopped working when distinguishing how seductive your tone became. “i–i..”

“relax a lil’ pup’. listen, will you promise to meet me later this eveningfor some tutoring. i think you could really use it. plus if you’re good–”

you shifted closer to the student’s ear lobe and whispered, “–noona could give you a reward.”

jeongin swore he felt some pre-cum drip down from his pants. “y–yes, noona.” he swallowed trying to moist his dry throat, then jumped moaning in pleasure when your small hand gripped around his erection.

“good. see you then, pup’.”

a few hours later, jeongin ends up at the university’s public library, not knowing what to expect. though, he did make sure to be ready for any possible situation. what did you mean by rewarding him? did you feel the same way he did?

you must have since you did touch his swollen cock during your conversation. or maybe it was just his imagination?

jeongin sighs restlessly thinking of the concept while waiting for your arrival. that soon ends as he hears your alluring voice greet out, “hiya pup’! ready for our lesson?”

he peers up from the library’s table to see you wearing informal clothing. a tight crew neck that reveals your smooth arms extending down to red-painted nails and large breasts bouncing with every step you take.

“ah! i hope you weren’t waiting too long, i got held up in traffic.”

“t–that’s okay noona! i just got here.”

you smile at his nervousness, now acknowledging where it came from, and sat down in the hard chair right next to him. “good, we can get started. i hope you’re ready,” you whispered, feeling an urge to dominate.

jeongin gulps recognizing a certain excitement coming from his pants within hearing your tone and replies with, “r–ready?”

“so, what does adaptation consist of?”

jeongin couldn’t comprehend what you were saying being he focused on the way your glossed-up lips looked. the way he could imagine it wrapped around cock or it traveling up and down the side of his neck molding kisses; it worked him to the point where he was solid hard.

“pup’, what is going through that mind of yours?”

“s–sorry. it’s just, i guess this lesson isn’t grasping in my head yet.” he tries to explain not wanting to upset you.

however, instead of upsetting you, your colored eyes just darken. “oh! i have any idea; remember when i said i would reward you if do good–”

jeongin nods excitedly, making you giggle.

“–well, i know you understand the concept of this chapter. so to push you a little more, i’ll ask you a question and if you get it right, that little cock of yours will get to come.”

the student freezes up at your approach, thinking it was a dream too good to be true. “w-wait what?”

“what is the definition of homeostasis?”

“i, uh, i think it's an organism's constant adjustment to maintain stable conditions in itself?”

you reached under the table discreetly and unbuttoned the pants on jeongin grasping his swollen cock. “o-oh my god, noona!”

“shh, pup’. you gotta be quiet for me; now onto the next question. who created the biogenesis theory?”

jeongin’s breath became too much for him to handle feeling the pre-cum drip from his blood-filled tip. “n–noona, please.”

“come on puppy, tell me the answer or i stop.”

his mind starts to rush trying to find the answer before you let him go. it took him a couple of seconds, but once he got it, he hurried to speak. “henry charlton bastain!”

“good puppy.” your tiny hand moves faster, satisfied with the statement. you felt his cock throbbing with every stroke you took. like jeongin, you dreamt of this same exact moment. you wanted to control the poor student every time he walked through your room, when he made eye contact with you, or even when his plump bottom lip was bitten from his teeth.

and finally, it was happening.

“oh, who’s a good puppy for noona?”

“m-me! i am noona.”

“that’s right pup’. next question, what are the five steps to the scientific method?”

i.n.’s vein from his cock popped out sensing the rubbing moving faster than before. “i only know four noona!”

“too bad, i wanted five or i slow down.” you coldly demand.

jeongin began to try to think hard on the five steps letting the sensation run through his body. “o-okay. it’s defining the problem, making a hypothesis, testing it, analyzing the results… then..”

your hand slows at his hesitation. “give me the last one puppy.”

“oh! noona, don’t stop! i–i. is it d–drawing the conclusions?”

“good puppy!”

his cock grows bigger when your finger grips at the base. then, you painted nails lightly scratch at his tight balls. “oh! noonaaa. that feels sooo goood. pleaseee.”

“continue to answer like a good pup’ then i’ll keep going.”

soon after the next few questions, jeongin sits near his breaking point. “nooonnnaaa! please!”

“grab your textbook and hold it up.”

i.n. clutches the hard-covered biology book to cover both you and him from public eyes. suddenly, you lower yourself to his lips, deeply kissing him with tongue, and wander towards his earlobe. “one more question, pup’. what does stimulus mean?”

“uh! noona! please let me come! make your puppy come!” he moans a little too loud.

“shh. answer the question, then i’ll let you come.”

“s-stimulus? it m-means anything an organism responds to.”

you then move your head to spit down to moist his penis. “good puppy! getting your small cock rubbed in front of everyone like a little slut.” you cup the back of his neck feeling the shivers release through him.

“you can come pup’, come for noona.”

jeongin then lets go, coming hard in your hand. “o-oh! thank you, thank you noona!”

after guiding him to his high, you let go of him and licked the white, sticky substance from your hand.

“good puppy. i’m sure you’ll be ready for that next exam.”

[bokutosworld]

sick day | tsukishima kei

pairing: tsukishima kei x gn!reader  word count, genre: 1.7k words, college au, fluff, childhood friends to maybe lovers.  warning: none!  summary: you and tsukishima have been friends for as long as the both of you can remember. and when you’re down with the flu, he’s left with no choice but to take care of you. 

“Can you drop by their home and give them this paper?” 

Tsukishima stares blankly at the piece of paper and back at the girl who approached him. He hasn’t even gotten up from his chair when Yachi stopped him. 

He already knows who she was referring to and was quick to turn her down. “Move. I’m packing my bag.” 

The girl grumbles, moving out of the way but continues, “Come on! You know where they live.”

“Correction, you know it too.” Tsukishima retorts. He walks past her, striding with his long legs over to the door and exiting. But Yachi was hot on his trail. “Why don’t you do it yourself?” 

Yachi groans, “I would but I’m too busy with the school paper right now. I have to head to the office to assist in lay-outing this month’s release.” She stops in her tracks, catching Tsukishima’s wrist and turning him around. “You live in the same neighborhood. Please, I promise I’ll repay you.” 

She waves the paper in front of him, and eventually, he’s left with no choice but to do the task. He sighs before snatching the form and turning on his heel, “You owe me.” 

— 

As he walks the familiar route towards home, he wonders about the last time he saw you in campus. It had actually been three days since then. Worried, his mind runs about hundreds of possibilities about why you hadn’t showed up in classes.  

The only possible thing that he could think of was that you were down with a flu. This predicament that he was in right now oddly reminds him of a time in middle school when you were absent for a week because of a severe cold. Growing up, he’s noticed that you were extremely prone to getting sick and Tsukishima always berates you for not taking care of yourself properly. Especially during flu season. 

When he passes by a convenience store, he decides to buy some instant porridge, water, and medicine. He wonders if your family were at home but gets the answer that he was looking for when he’s arrived in front of your house with the lights off. 

He eyes the building and notices the faint light coming from the side which he knows was your room.

Tsukishima enters the door, unlocking it with ease as he inputs the passcode he’s known since the both of you were kids. He feels for the switch on the wall and turns the lights open. 

He makes his way to the kitchen and places everything on the counter. He’s in the process of boiling some water when he hears footsteps walking closer. 

“Who’s there?” Your voice sounds weak and when Tsukishima turns, he sees you, cozily bundled in a hoodie and holding on to a blanket as you lean on the wall for support. 

He’s quick on his feet to help and sit you down on a chair. “You shouldn’t have left your bed,” he mutters under his breath. 

You recognize the voice, “Kei? What are you doing here?” 

He was back on the counter, opening the pack of porridge and filling it with water to cook for five minutes. He hands you a glass of water and you down it. “Yachi told me to tell you about our final project in Literature.” He takes the paper from his bag and sticks it on the refrigerator with a magnet. “Here’s the reference. Don’t lose it.” 

You manage to let out a small chuckle. “Look at you, being kind for once.” 

“Shut up.” But his words say otherwise when the look in his eyes are soft, watching over you to make sure you didn’t fall from the chair. “Where’s everybody?” 

You put your head on the table and groan. “They’re out to visit the grandparents in the countryside. Said I couldn’t make it because of school requirements but here I am.” 

“You’ve been alone this whole time?”

“Yeah,” you say with a yawn.  

He tuts at you to show his disapproval, “Why didn’t you tell anyone you were sick?” 

“Eh, no one would have bothered anyway.” 

He hands you the hot dish and you take it with a whispered thanks. You devour it in silence, relishing in the warmth that fills your body. Tsukishima hangs back, saying nothing and only observes as you eat what looks like the first decent meal you’ve had since you’ve been sick. 

“I would.”  

His sudden answer almost makes you sputter the food out from your mouth. You look at him, and though it was dark, you could make out his features and the way he was staring at you with such intensity. 

“I mean, I’m here now, aren’t I?” He takes a seat beside you, taking the cup from your hands and feeding you the last few scoops. “My parents would have made me come here either way to check on you.” 

You curse the way your heart flutters at his words. The heat on your cheeks not anymore caused by your fever but by Tsukishima who was sitting way too close for your comfort and helping you finish the porridge. After he gives you the medicine, he extends his arm out and you look at him in question. 

“Come on, I’m bringing you back to your room.” When you don’t make a move, he pulls you up to your feet and hooks one arm around your waist to keep you steady by his side. The two of you begin the slow trek to your room. 

He’s careful to lay you down on the mattress, cradling your head as he fluffs and positions the pillow under you. You seem to be already lost in your dreams when he pulls the blanket over your body, tucking you in and making sure you were warm. When he’s done, he kneels down by the side of your bed and gazes at you. 

He’s transfixed on memorizing the outlines of your face—the one thing he’d never admit he always liked to do whenever he went to your house for sleepovers years ago. Absentmindedly, he traces your features, sighing as he wanted so badly to tell you off about not properly taking care of yourself.

“Kei.” 

Surprised, he pulls back his hand, “What?” He knows you’d tease him to no end when you saw what he was doing. 

“You should be like this all the time,” you say sleepily with a smile. “Who knew you had a sweet and caring side in you?”

He smirks, “Don’t push your luck.” He puts the back of his hand on your forehead to determine whether your fever has gone down. It was still hotter than normal and Tsukishima only sighs, “You should really learn to look after yourself.” 

Burying yourself deeper in the blankets, you hum, “But I like having you take care of me.” 

He’s surprised, mostly at the way your voice sounded so calm and soft when you said those words. Because he knows that on any other day, you’d have responded with a smart quip and maybe a punch to his arm. He’s aware it could be the flu talking, making you bare your true feelings similarly to how a drunk man would reveal their sober thoughts. But will you remember them when you wake up tomorrow? 

He laughs quietly before leaning to press a kiss to your temple, “I don’t mind it too.” 

But you were already fast asleep to have heard anything. 

—

The following day, you woke up as if you never had intense fever the night before. The bad headache and chills that you felt was gone and you could move your body without feeling heavy. So not wanting to miss out more on lectures, you got ready and finally went back to school. 

To say that Yachi was overjoyed to see you was an understatement. Your friend sighed of relief and ran to tackle you with a hug the second she saw you step foot on campus. She caught you up to speed about everything that has happened and the tasks that your professors on your shared classes has assigned. 

The two of you were settling in your seats when she remembers, “By the way, did you receive the paper about our Literature project? I had Tsukishima bring it to you.” 

“Really? I didn’t receive anything.” 

And just as she was about to complain about Tsukishima, the door opens loudly and the said boy enters the room. 

“Oh, Kei! Great timing, we were just talking about you,” you greeted as your childhood friend headed straight to your desks. 

Meanwhile, Yachi complained, “Tsukishima, I told you to pass over the reference to them.”  

The boy just walked past her, and stopped in front of you. He stuck out a pack of banana milk (your favorite drink) and some fruits, making you confused at the sudden gesture.

“What’s this?” 

“You skip your breakfasts, right?” You were shocked that he knew about your unhealthy habit. “I don’t want you getting sick again so make sure you eat properly.” 

Yachi’s jaw dropped at his nice attitude. You’re wary as you take drink and snacks from his hand, looking at him as if he grew another head on his body. “You’re being suspicious, Kei. What do you need?” 

He takes the seat beside you, laughing when he turns towards you with a wicked smile that has your heart beating faster. 

“I’m just doing what I need to do as your friend.” He resumes to fix his things on the table. “Besides, weren’t you the one who said you liked me taking care of you?” 

You stutter, cheeks feeling hot as vague snippets from when Kei visited you and took care of you came flashing in your mind. Yachi was now giggling and congratulating you for finally confessing. As you watched the grin on his face, you wished for a hole to appear on the ground and swallow you whole. 

Because your crush on your longtime childhood friend was something you never wanted him to know. 

But that thought was quickly erased when Tsukishima leaned close and whispered, 

“For what it’s worth, I like you too.” 

And since then, Tsukishima started keeping you close and took care of you in the little ways he knows how just so you never have to experience a sick day again. 

[dp-marvel94]

Dan Redemption with a twist

So I'm still geeking out over my ask that @stillebesat answered a few days ago, the one where about an upcoming fic. I've been playing around with a really similar idea, with a redeemed Dan fusing with a clone of Danny, for months now.

Here's my idea:

First of all, my preferred version of Dan is basically Danny but evil. He less fused with Plasmius and more consumed his powers so Dan doesn't have any of Vlad's memories. Next, I'm a big fan of the idea that Dan deeply regrets killing his human half and is, for lack of a better word, haunted by the action. It was the first death of his reign of terror, his final chance to turn back from the dark path he was on and...it was his suicide.

Now, Dan doesn't realize any of this for what feels like centuries. He's trapped in the Fenton thermos in Clockwork's lair, alone with only his thoughts. And the knowledge starts creeping in, all that he'd lost, all that he'd done. He realizes that he misses his friends and family and to his surprise, he hopes his younger self saved them. But then he realized that he tried to kill them. And the guilt starts creeping in. The regret follows and he remembers all the rest of his crimes. He doesn't have enough humanity, enough emotional capacity to be wrecked but he's no longer a rage fueled destructive monster.

Then to Dan's shook, Clockwork releases him without a word. The master of time dumps him in the new timeline, maybe a few months after the events of TUE. To his dim relief, Dan finds that his friends and family are all still alive. He watches them for a while, trying to process where he is and what happened. But then he runs into Danny. And things don't go well. It's a rocky start. Danny does not trust Dan at all. He doesn't trust that the older ghost has no intention of hurting his loved ones. Danny is ready and willing to fight and recapture him. The younger's opinion doesn't change until Dan saves him and Jazz during a ghost attack. The two ghosts, at Jazz's insistence, come to an uneasy impasse. Danny will leave Dan alone if the older ghost leaves him and his family alone. Dan isn't really happy about this arrangement but it's better than being trapped in the thermos again and he does have no intention of hurting his younger counterpart or his loved ones.

So Dan concedes. He stays out of Danny's way. He watches. He catches glimpses of his former friends and family from a distance. And it hurts. Dan feels out of place, disconnected. This isn't his time, isn't his place. He's stuck on the outside looking in... and this timeline already has a Danny, one who didn't make the aggresous mistakes he did. And those mistakes... the guilt's still there but like all other emotions, it's dim and distant. That's how it's been since his death, with every emotion but rage. But still, Dan does not like being on the outside looking in. He needs to do something else with himself, find some place he can belong.

Then Dan remembers Vlad. He had gone to the older half ghost after losing everything. And... Vlad had tried to help him. Separating the then halfa at his request had been a horrible idea but Vlad had been trying. Vlad did care about him. And.... the man must be so lonely now. Lonely like Dan himself is.

It's something of a wim but Dan goes to the older halfa. And at first, it's a surprise to Vlad and then seemingly a dream come true. Here in front of him is a version of Daniel who wants to stay by his side willingly. This Dan is more powerful and experienced than his younger counterpart, though not as experienced as Vlad. The young man is willing to be taught and all he seemingly wants is companionship. Yes, it would be a dream come true except...

Dan will not tolerate any of Vlad's shit. He will not be used to hurt anyone ever again. He will not take part in any of Vlad's schemes against the Fentons. It's a high price to pay but the older man backs off. Vlad is content to not be alone and have a chance to convince Dan to work with him.

So Dan stays with Vlad. With the older man busy with work, Dan has free reign of the mansion for most of the day. In some ways, it's nice. Away from Amity Park, there's no temptation to check on his former loved ones. His longing for a life he can no longer have is diminished. Vlad's mansion provides ample distraction, in the library, the game room, the gardens. But... the days are long and often lonely and the nights... they're even worse. The large building, empty and quiet, it's too much like a time Dan wishes he could forget. The memories are stronger now. After the fiery explosion...weeks of weeping in his room. Somber diners with Vlad where he couldn't force himself to eat. Waking up from another nightmare.

Without his humanity, the grief isn't as soul wrenching as it should be. But it's ever present, the memories on repeat. And there is little to break them up. As a ghost, Dan cannot sleep. He cannot eat. He can't truly feel the sun on his face or the comforting chill of the water on the pool. All physical sensations are dimmed.

And Dan starts to realize, it's excruciating. He feels incomplete, like there's a gapping whole in his chest. The memories of his own death, seen from the outside, return. His own icy blue eyes wide with fear and pain. Red blood spattered on his face. It's horrifying. Or it should be. If Dan could muster up more than the dimmest shadow of the emotion. But he can't, because the part of him that could died 10 years ago. And... this is wrong. He is wrong.

He should have died completely as himself, as Danny Fenton. He shouldn't have watched his death from the outside by his own hands. He shouldn't be this half being that couldn't even be bothered to die properly.

Dan stews, a forgotten anger growing as he longs for something he'd once wanted rid of. His human self, his Fenton, his humanity... he wants it. He wants to be truly, completely himself again. He wants to be whole enough to fade, to move on.

But that is the problem with ghosts, especially one like him. They do not change. They do not move on. As much as Dan acts like he is older, like he is different, he is not. He's the same angry, broken teen that he was ten years ago. And he will never be anything else.

Dan rages, trashing Vlad's training room. Soon enough, his anger is spent and the young man comes back to his senses. Dan huffs in frustration and annoyance at himself. He'd rather enjoyed Vlad's training room and now the man himself will likely be cross with him. Dan does his best to put the room back in order and find something else to do.

But the pain, regret, and longing linger. At some level, Dan thinks he's being ridiculous. All his former loved ones are alive. Dan isn't alone. He has Vlad and the ability to determine his own future. This world wasn't ravaged by his hand. His mistakes have been erased. He should be free. Except...

No, his mistakes are not all erased. His own death returns to his mind over and over. He shouldn't think about, he shouldn't dwell on it but...

One day, Dan goes down to Vlad's secret lab. He knows he shouldn't. This is such a breach of Vlad's trust but... this is were it happened. The young man stares at the metal table. If he was capable of feelings cold, he would shiver. There, where he was pulled out of his body. That wall, he cornered his human half there, the boy cowering in fear. There, that control panel was spattered with his own blood.

Dan wishes he could cry but he's not human enough for that. He's not human at all. But he wishes he was.

Startled by the thought, the full ghost turns away. He shouldn't wish for things he can't have but... no. Dan's eyes flicker around the room, looking for small differences from his memories. Some of the equipment is laid out differently. There are different samples on the shelf and... that door wasn't there before.

Dan walks through and finds... metal and glass chambers in different degrees of construction. A few are filled with ectoplasm and there in the back... if Dan had a heart, it would stop. There in a clear pod with a breathing mask over his face is...Danny Fenton. No, that's not right. This isn't... this isn't his timeline. And his younger counterpart is in Amity Park so....

Dan frantically searches Vlad's computer, his notes for answers. Clones. Vlad had been trying to clone his younger half ghost counterpart. In the tube... clone 3. Fully human. Suffered mental decline from 2 weeks gestation and eventually brain death a month later. Body kept alive by machines since... the week Dan arrived.

Dan wishes he could feel shock. He wishes he could feel relief. From the data, this was the first attempt that even resembled something human. The others were by all measures animals, in no way sentient. And it appears Vlad hasn't continued working since Dan came to live with him. But still...

Dan confronts Vlad, asking about the experiments, about the clone kept on life support.

"I could not bear to pull the plug." Vlad answers, surprisingly sober. "I'd hoped his condition would improve." There is a far away look in his eyes, a longing. "I tried everything I could think of to stop the degradation but..." The older half ghost shook his head. "I'm continuing to monitor 3's status." There was a pain in Vlad voice. "I fear he won't live to see the outside of his chamber."

Vlad was in denial, Dan thinkd. This clone is gone, like his own human half. The heart still beats, the lungs still breath but...

He shock his head. "Before you approach me, I consider...if I could create a viable, ghostly clone and coax the spirit to hybridize with the body..."

The idea was ridiculous and he should be disgusted, hearing all Vlad had done, what he had planned but...

"That is all in the past now." Vlad finished sadly.

All in the past like the loss of his own human half. He shouldn't wish for things that he couldn't have but...

"I'm a viable ghost..." Dan could barely believe the words coming out his mouth. "Not a clone but... I am without a human side."

Vlad is staring at him like he has another head, something which Dan was sure he did not currently have. "Daniel...are you suggesting... what I think you are suggesting?"

Was he? It was ridiculous, impossible. He could not replace his human side by... possessing an animated corpse.

"No. I am not." Dan denied. "Forget I said anything."

Vlad gave a nod, dropping the conversation. But Dan did not forget. This idea... it was wrong. It was impossible. He couldn't be made a half ghost again. But...

The temptation. If anyone could get it to work, it would be Vlad. And if it did...the ghost floats to what had been his bedroom and laid down. If it worked, he could sleep. He could eat. He could go out in public with human. It would necessarily be a replacement for what he'd lost but...

No... this was wrong. This was basically a clone of himself whose body he wanted to steal. But... was it really? This was an empty body, no mind, no soul. It was mad science but... Dan was already the product of mad science.

And if it worked, not as an overshadowing but a hybrization... he could truly age, he could grow passed what happened. And he could feel more than the pale shadows he could now.

The next day, Dan asks Vlad for what he wants.

"Are you sure?" The man asked. "This could have unknown consequences on your body or your mind. You could even destabilize."

That gave Dan pause. This might not work. He might end up in unknown pain or even fade but... "this is worth the risk."

The pair work together, planning and experimenting. They give the body transfusions of Dan's ectoplasm. The younger ghost practices envisioning himself as a halfa again. He prepares himself.

"I will need to reduce you down to your core." Vlafd says solemnly.

Dan places his existence in Vlad's hands. After blowing off seemingly endless amounts of energy in a desolate portion of the Ghost Zone, the older halfa repeatedly shocks him with the Plasmius Maximus. Dan's body pops out of existence, leaving his core exposed.

As just a core, there is no sensation. No input. No output. It's terrifyingly like being in the thermos again. Dan knows he is being moved. Vlad is doing something to him but... there is nothing and too much at the same time.

Dan can not process. He is cradled. There is something beside him, something around him reaching out. Something is changing. He is changing. It is too much. Dan loses consciousness for the first time in ten years. It is not sleep. There is no dream. He can think one moment, separated from the world. And the next...

He is under water. Something is beeping. He feels light but heavy. Cold but warm. His center is fluttering, something straining and pounding. An emotion. Something that might be panic or fear suddenly rises in him, crashing over him as a wave. An equally panicked voice comes from in front of him. Then there's a sting in his neck. Sting? Pain? Pain, it's been so long since he felt pain. And... his neck? He has a neck again. Dan blacks out again.

The young man comes to again. There is still something beeping near his head. He's not under water now but laying on something soft. Soft and warm. Warm....Dan can feel that. His breath hitches. Breath... he feels lungs move on his chest. And...he feel heavy and warm. Something... something happened. He can't remember what...

Dan's eyes flutter open, falling on... Vlad.

The man's eyes met his, relief flashing across them. "Daniel." He sighs. "How do you feel?"

"Feel?" Dan crocks. Is that... is that his voice? "What...what happened?" The ghost (?) thinks he might know. "Did it work?" He whispered.

Dan's voice... his voice is high, like when he was a younger teen. It should feel strange but...

"Take a look." Vlad says, offering him a mirror.

Dan reaches forward with a shaking hand. His hand... it's not gloved, neither is it blue. It's.... he stares. It's a pale peach color like... his hands are smaller and thinner....

"Daniel." Vlad interrupts. "It's alright." He holds the mirror up and...

Dan meets blue eyes. His own blue eyes. Eyes he never thought he'd see again except on someone else. His eyes water as he reaches towards the mirror. "It worked."

His new heart is aching, a thousand emotions hitting him. Joy, happiness, relief, grief, guilt, regret. All of them are bigger, nearer, more real and soul-aching than it's been in years. He should be upset. He looks and sounds like a kid again. But... "I'm alive."

He is alive. And it is a joy. A gift. A promise. He will not waste this second chance.

The newly remade halfa is crying and...it's never felt so good.

[sup-hoes-its-me]

Emotion (Kakashi x Reader)

A/N: Kakashi again...can't get enough of this mans tbh. U r an empath due to your kekkei genkai and Kakashi has always been difficult to read. Friend to lovers. Sharing one bed folks, we got some steamyyy shit here. Angst warning as well.

Word count: 6000

He was always alone. Ever since his childhood, he walked the world completely alone with only a few people there to support him. No mother, no father, no mentor, no teammates. He was at the mercy of fate his entire life, things being stolen from him time and time again. 

He just prayed that he could keep her. Y/N L/N, the only woman to have wormed her way into his heart and made a home there.

When they first met, Kakashi and Y/N, she cursed him for being such a weirdo. Apparently his mind was empty and his heart was seemingly full of sand. He was conditioned that way, and that is how he lived for the longest time. It wasn't a surprise for him to hear that.

But she thought it was stranger than anything she'd ever seen, and so she followed him. She would figure him out, bring him back down to Earth from his supposed high horse. That woman was determined, and frankly he didn't mind her being around. She was quiet enough that it didn't matter. Not to mention on the missions they had together, she was quite the partner.

Over time, she'd learned to read him like a book. It was part of her clan's kekkei genkai. The ultimate empath, I suppose. The ability to read a persons every single emotion and then turn that, if they so choose, into power. 

She was never the greatest fighter, but her negotiation skills were the best they could possibly be. She would dive into the emotions of another and manipulate them backwards and forwards to get what she wanted. 

It was overwhelming, walking into a room of people and immediately being bombarded with so many feelings coming at her all at once. Occasionally, if the situation was bad enough she'd have to take a seat and clear her mind, organizing each person in her mind like a filing cabinet of empathy.

But damn, did she try to weasel out every bit of feeling she could. It was just something that came so naturally, she couldn’t help but instigate whatever was brewing up inside him.

"Kakashi, if you're happy, you know you're allowed to express it. You don't have to hide it away," she told him, staring at the masked man sitting across from her at the table. He was watching as she sharpened her kunai, and she could feel the content running off his body in small bursts. He was feeling better. Better than he had in a little while. Of course she picked up on it.

He sighed, rolling his eyes. She was always reading him, he knew that. He just preferred when she refrained from mentioning it. It did, most times, feel like a bit of an invasion of privacy, how she could deep dive into the corners of his mind. There were things no one else could ever possibly know that she did. It was strange, but he was used to it.

"What? Want me to smile or something?"

"No, but you should let yourself go. Just drop the facade."

"Stop doing that. Getting into my head."

Quietly, she set down her blade and picked up the next one, taking a cloth and softly wiping away any dirt. Her eyes slide up to his for a moment, her all knowing gaze filling his vision. "It's basically impossible. Especially if you're the only one around. There's nothing else to focus on except you." He knew that. It wasn't like she had an on or off switch. That was the downside of this dojutsu. Unlike sharingan and byakugan users, hers was always pulling the strings of her brain.

"You've got that mission next week. With Naruto and a few of the other kids, right?"

"Yes."

"It's A rank, isn't it?"

She hummed in agreement. He had a habit of knowing about all her missions, more importantly being the dangerous ones. He wasn't necessarily scared for her, probably not. He was more cautious than anything. There was this nagging feeling in his head that he shouldn't let her go on these missions alone. That it was too dangerous for her to handle. 

But he was wrong. She was stronger than he thought, and could hold her own in battle. He was just a worrier. He'd just lost too many, seen too many bodies in front of his eyes to trust. God, he wanted to trust her, but he couldn't. She was too vulnerable. His friend, one of the only ones who hadn't died yet. For all he knew, her days numbered, that's how paranoid he was about everything.

"You'll be careful?"

"That's a silly question." He gave her a look that said he was more serious than anything, and she sighed. "Of course I'll be careful. I have people that would miss me if I wasn't." He was one of them. She could sense his fear whenever she said goodbye and his relief when she returned. He really tried to remain objective, but his heart said otherwise. 

And she would be a liar to say that she did not experience the same relief seeing him come home from missions, even if he was beaten and bruised to the bone, she was just happy he made it back. So many never got to come home. It was a sick world, they lived in, but she could relish in the little comforts.

"Don't worry about me. I'll always turn out fine. It's you and your dumb students we have to worry about."

"I hear you. Those kids are enough to drive a person mad." He rested his chin in his palm, the mere thought of those kids causing his blood pressure to rise.

"Thankfully my students never gave me any trouble. Sweet little things."

"Well, aren't you just lucky, Y/N?"

"What can I say? Kurenai and I got the luck of the draw with our students. You men had it rough, I have to admit," she laughed. It was funny that he was so unfortunate to have gotten assigned the Uchiha and the Uzumaki, two completely opposite but persistent forces. "Despite your perverted tendencies and your perpetual lateness, you still did a great job teaching them."

"Thanks. But do you really have to call me a pervert? I'm really not."

"Yeah? That explains why you read porn in public. Admit you're a pervert, you dumb old man."

"We're the same age-" he began to argue, but she just cut him off with her harsh words.

"Creep," she muttered, running the sharpening stone along her blade. He narrowed his eyes. She was being awfully annoying, and he knew she could sense his irritation building up. Yet she continued just to be a pain in the ass.

 He warned, "Hey. Watch it, L/N."

"Okay, okay, I'll stop...Pervert." She ducked her head when his hand reached out to wring her around the neck for being so frustrating, and she continued to laugh. It was nice, having a friend she could joke with and be around without having to worry about what she said. He might pretend to be mad, but she could feel the happiness still rolling off his body thickly under all that fake neutrality. 

He was happier than he'd been in a long while, and she found herself swelling with pride knowing that she might have helped make that happen. Her lips curled into the gentlest of smiles as she peered back up at him, and he found himself smiling back even if it was just through the mask. 

He swore in that moment, he'd make sure Y/N didn't end up like all the others. She would live. He'd break this wretched curse just for her. He was sure of it.

______

"How could you be so reckless?! Do you want to die?" Kakashi shouted at his friend who could only stand there angrily, arms crossed over her chest and one foot in the other direction. She didn't need to be lectured by someone who took just as many risks every single mission as she did.

"Kakashi, I really don't want to hear it. You have no idea how it went."

"Yeah but Naruto does, and we were just talking."

She placed her free hand over her chest and exclaimed even angrier than before, "You're going to trust a kid over me? Naruto even?" It was just low to trust Naruto when she was right there to explain herself. Just let her speak for once, she wanted to say but he of course, had something else to say.

He waved his arm toward the ramen shop, eyes glaring. "Don’t be rude. He's right there. What is wrong with you?"

Indeed, Naruto was sitting inside Ichiraku with Jiraiya at his side, munching on pork ramen while the pair fought outside. Kakashi was eating with them, taking a break from his work to just relax with his master and student when out of the corner of his eye he noticed Y/N stumbling down the street on her crutch. 

He heard when she got back home that she was in the infirmary for a couple days. He had no idea for what reason until Naruto explained to him what happened. She was being needlessly reckless on the battlefield, relying too much on her kekkei genkai and not enough on her brain. She threw herself right in the way of an enemy, for what reason, he didn't know. All he knew was that she could have died and she didn't seem to care one bit.

Rightfully so, he was mad. Normally he preferred not to make a scene in the open like this, but there wasn't anyone else around and he was red-hot.

She huffed. "He knows I don't mean anything bad by that. How could he not? I'm also his sensei, you know."

"Doesn't matter," Kakashi brushed off her words. "What you did was dangerous and you don't seem to care. Next time what are you gonna do? Run right into the arms of the enemy?"

"No, I would never. Kakashi, you're just being a jerk right now. I'm literally injured from the hip down and you have to yell at me? Jeez, just be grateful I'm alive, okay? Things happen," she tried to reason with him, but he didn't acknowledge it. He wasn't exactly feeling all that rational.

"Things don't just happen like that."

She groaned, "Well apparently they do, because it happened to me."

His eye narrowed and she noticed the way he clenched and unclenched his fists a couple times by his sides. Clearly he was just trying to channel his anger, but he really had no reason to be so upset. She hadn't done anything to him. He really needed to relax. "This is so like you L/N's. Always so emotional. Always thinking you're stronger than you actually are."

"Excuse you-"

"Get a grip, you aren't going to live forever."

"First off, don't interrupt me. Second, don't talk about my clan ever again, you hear me, Hatake? We don't live to please your dumbass," she cursed, how dare he say shit about her clan. That asshole. He was just being so...so unlike himself. She had no idea what had gotten into him, but she hated it and just wanted to continue on her way before he said something else stupid. 

Normally, she didn't expect to be bombarded in the street nearly the second she leaves the hospital, but Kakashi never fails to surprise her.

"I've got to go. Don't bother following me." With that, she took off past him, rushing as fast as she could on her crutch, which was pathetically slow. Silently, she cringed at how ridiculous she must look waddling around like this in a fit of rage. Nevermind that. She had better things to do.

He huffed out the breath he had been holding to walk back into the ramen shop, taking his seat beside Naruto and slouching down into the stool. Immediately, Master Jiraiya met his eyes, wisdom about to drip from his tongue once again. "You need to go apologize."

"Why? She clearly doesn't want that right now."

"Well, to start, you insulted her clan which is a big no-no. Imagine saying that to an Uchiha. You're lucky she let you off so easily."

"Yeah, Kakashi. You kinda just attacked her out there in the street," Naruto added.

Jiraiya continued, "Mainly though, the longer you let her stay angry, the worse it'll be for you in the end. Trust me."

"She said don't follow her."

"And you're actually going to listen?" The older man laughed. "You and her fighting reminded me a lot of young Tsunade and I. And let me tell you, you don't just let a woman like that go. I sure did. It’s not a fun time."

"Yeah, Kakashi sensei, go find Y/N."

The jounin stood from his stool and slapped a ramen voucher onto the counter top to pay for his meal. This really didn't seem like a good idea, he had to admit. But he would trust the process. This was the author of his favorite romance series, after all. How could he get something like this wrong? To put blind faith into Jiraiya on realistic romantic matters was probably the not the wisest thing to do, but it was the only thing he had to go on. "I'll go, but this doesn't sound like good advice."

"If you let this go, she's might run into the arms of another man for comfort. Do you want that?"

Tch, there was no way she was gonna do that. She barely had any friends. If anything she would go see Kurenai. Still, he pulled back the cloth at the entrance and muttered, "I gotta catch up to her."

"'Atta boy," Jiraiya cheered, waving off the copy nin. "Another bowl, Naruto?"

"Yes, please!"

Kakashi walked down the streets, looking for the woman he was sent on a mission to find and apologize to. He searched through the shops and the stands for her, walked by her apartment no sign of her. It wasn't until he stumbled by the bookstore that he found her eyeing down the display out front, leaning comfortably on her crutch.

"Y/N," he called to her, and he watched as she tensed up without a second. He caught up to her, walking to stand beside her in front of the store windows. "I need to talk to you."

"What do you want?" She questioned, peering over at him with a quirked brow. He seemed calmed down by now. Thankfully. "Also, didn't I tell you not to follow me?"

"You did, but Jiraiya told me to apologize."

"So this isn't even on your own accord, you're doing it because Jiraiya told you so." He groaned. Of course she would twist his words and find some way to make things bad on his end. She was angry with him, what did he expect to happen? Her to accept him with open arms?

"Listen, I'm sorry for yelling at you. I was just overwhelmed."

"With what? I wasn't paying attention to anything but the anger." She picked at her finger nails in an attempt to remain casual, but really she was just itching to hear what he had to say. She was willing to give him a second chance, only because he was normally so sweet. This was just out of character for him.

He replied, "I was scared for you. Naruto told me about how you nearly died, and I was upset that you did that. I was upset because I could only think about what if you had been overpowered and the enemy killed you." His explanation was weak, but he hoped she would accept it as truth. He really wasn't lying. When he heard she was in the hospital indefinitely, he nearly had a heart attack himself. He worried for her every time she left on a mission without him. It just meant that if she failed, he wasn't there to protect her himself. He couldn't handle that thought.

"So you were worried?"

"Yes."

"Well, that's sweet of you, isn't it?"

"I'd miss you, you know. If you died."

She froze. That wasn't what she expected him to say. When she looked over at him, he was just staring into the storefront window, but she could feel the sadness in waves running off his body. She wobbled around on her crutch to face him, a hand getting coming up to rest on his shoulder. "It's okay."

"I don't want you going on missions without me because every time it scares the shit out of me thinking they'll bring you back dead. Every time. I don't know why."

"It's normal to worry for your teammates."

"It's not the same, and you know it."

"Ah." And she felt it. Even if it was just a little hint of something, she felt his infatuation roll off his body and she took it in like a drink of cold water. So refreshing. Was he attracted to her? She had no idea before this that he cared so much but from the sound of it, he had some strong feelings attached. She wanted to reach out and hug him, tell him it was going to be okay, but that felt too personal. Instead, she leant back and muttered, "You know, Kakashi, I worry about you too."

"It's good we both have someone who cares, right?"

"Right."

"Well, I should be on my way, but, uh, if you need some help getting up to your apartment-"

"I should be fine."

"Okay, good."

"Yeah, so uh, see you," she turned on her heel and started heading in the other direction toward her home when suddenly, his hand reached out to stop her. 

"Wait, Y/N. I think..."

"What is it?"

"It's just that I need you. Please be careful from now on."

She stopped, turning around just enough to get a good look at his face. He only watched her, a glimmer of something she didn't recognize in his eye. 

"As long as you take care of yourself too, Mister."

"Y/N, I…"

All she could feel was a rough fabric rubbing against her face for a second before the full picture came into view. 

Mask to lips. I repeat, mask to lips.

She stared at him, as he kissed her right there in front of their favorite bookstore. When he pulled away after a second, he seemed just as shocked as she was. She pressed a hand to her forehead and struggled to find the right words to say. 

Kakashi Hatake just kissed her. 

And she definitely liked it. More than any other kiss she’d ever had before. She loved it. Mask or not, that was one of the best surprises of her entire life, and she honestly had no idea how to react. She settled for the easiest possible thing, running in the opposite direction, give herself time to think over what that meant for the two of them if anything at all. Kakashi wasn’t the type to have a girlfriend, he was always single. There just wasn’t room in his life for her.

There was plenty room in her life to fit him in comfortably. And there was more than enough room in her bed as well. 

Flustered, with heat coming to sit in her cheeks and run up her neck, she turned and motioned in the direction of her home. She just had too many thoughts to sit here and pretend she wasn’t dying inside from the tension.

"I've got to run home now," she managed to say. "Well, not run, with these crutches and all, but you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I should be going too. I'll see you around,” he mumbled, running his hand through his hair and down the back of his neck. 

"See you."

And into separate directions they went, just as confused as ever.

______

"Kakashi, I swear to God, if you don't stay on your side of the bed, I'm gonna-

"You'll what? Hit me? Go ahead. You're the one that keeps snoring."

"Shut up!" she exclaimed, rolling over in the bed and planting her fist directly in the middle of his chest. He didn't even flinch, she hadn't meant to hurt him anyway. She was just so annoyed. You would think that the stoic Hatake would be easy to sleep beside but no, he was a pain in the ass. He was rude. He was way too hot under the sheets. He still smelled like dog even after taking a bath. Just overall a bad experience, definitely 0 out of 10.

"What? It's the truth."

She groaned, throwing one of her arms over her eyes, burying her nose in the crook of her elbow. "Whatever. Don't ever mention my snoring again. It’s embarrassing me." She was self-conscious. She was usually so good at maintaining a cool and calm presence and now Kakashi was seeing that all crumble. Great. 

"Fine."

"Can't you just stay on your side so we can both sleep comfortably?"

"Can't you just stop snoring so I can sleep comfortably?" 

What a bastard. She could practically feel him snickering beneath his mask, and she felt frustration bubbling up in her chest. He was annoying. The audacity of this man, laughing and causing trouble in the night when they clearly had a mission to continue tomorrow. She could actually feel the delight radiating off his form.

She jumped up from her spot and threw herself onto the man beside her, attempting to make a vicious grab for the throat so she could maybe shut him up for just a few seconds. He dodged easily, taking her wrists in his calloused hand and lowering them to rest on his chest. Still, he continued to laugh at her. She felt like an utter joke sitting there on his stomach, looking at him through loose strands of her hair. 

She grumbled under her breath, her cheeks puffing out full of embarrassment, "Stupid."

"Me? Stupid? Look at you."

She replied swiftly, "What about me? You're the one with that ugly grin on your face." Quickly, she snatched her hands out from under his to cross her arms over her chest. She rocked back a bit on her knees to get a better look at his indeed ugly face. 

Except he definitely wasn't ugly, and that grin was more devilishly handsome than anything else. And honestly, she felt herself starting to get flustered in the position she'd put herself in. Of course she didn't hate Kakashi. He was one of her friends and coworkers. It was just that sometimes he could be casually attractive and she found herself falling under his spell. 

He just looked so fucking good lying there, staring up at her with a glimmer in his dark eyes. She could see the smile outlined under his mask. His hands had felt warm and firm around her own fingers. She missed his touch, there she said it, any touch on her body from Kakashi Hatake felt like heaven. He was far too cute, and the soft contact between them drove her crazy.

She wanted to punch herself for thinking such silly things. This was Kakashi, one of her frenemies. Not boyfriend material. Stupid. Silly. 

If only he didn't look so good, Jesus christ. Get your brain out of the gutter, Y/N.

Little did she know, his mind was already waist deep in those damn gutters and he was loving it.

"You really think that?"

"What? That you're ugly?" She asked, tilting her head to the side just a bit as if to think about it. Only a second later, another mischievous smile crossed her lips. "Of course."

He lifted his fingers to slid along her waist and down to her hips, fingers curling ever so slightly around her curves. She shuddered as his hands slid down to hold the sides of her bare thighs in his hands, his warm, strong hands with the softest fingertips. She wanted to die.

Had they kissed before? Yes. We're they somewhat romantically involved? Maybe. Did that give him any good reason to rest his rough hands on her thighs like that? Probably, and her thoughts were running a mile a minute at this point. 

"Kakashi...stop that," she said softly, her voice lowering from how it was before. She suddenly felt a lot smaller, scared even. Hooking up with Kakashi wasn't something she planned on doing anytime in the near future, if at all. He was her friend, and she felt strange sitting in his lap with his hands all over her. It felt so right but wrong at the same time, like she was breaking the law. Well, laws of friendship that is.

She cared about Kakashi, more than she wanted to admit. He wasn't just a friend, he was something weirdly in between and she couldn't exactly put her finger on how she felt about him. All she knew was that if she was going to have sex with this man, it would be the right way. They would have to date first. She wasn't just gonna sleep around this time. He was different. 

She wanted to impress him, to make him smile and laugh, to take him out to dinner and hold hands on their way home, to kiss at her doorstep. She wanted all of that before any of this.

His hands dropped from her sides and she crawled away from him, grabbing her blanket and cradling herself in it. "Listen, Y/N, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"I know, it's not your fault. Don't worry about it."

It was quiet. Just the sounds of both their breaths filling the air and the crickets chirping in the darkness outside. She shifted in her blanket to rest her head on the wall, leaning against it with her shoulder. He remained on his back, staring up at the empty ceiling tiles. 

It was now so terribly awkward. Thanks, Y/N.

Finally, he broke the silence. "You, uh, don't snore all that much. I was just teasing you."

"Thanks," she exhaled. "You're not as ugly as I said."

"I know."

Wow, Kakashi. So modest.

Her words fell right into place as she spoke, emotions slipping out with each breath. She looked at his profile in the dark, the way his bedhead stood on end, his nose pointed upward and his lips sat calmly, the curve of his chin under the edge of his mask, the way his eyes just sat there unmoving and gentle, brows soft above the eye. She took in all of him as she confessed, "I just don't want it to be like this. I don't want to fall for you this way."

"I get it."

"I just think that you and I could be something different. You're not like the other guys to me, at least, I don't think of you that way," she took a deep breath. He still stared deep in the ceiling, and somehow it made her comfortable enough to confess everything she'd been feeling. It was as if he could just lay there and listen without words forever. "I don't want you to just fuck me before we really...well I don't know, we've never even been on a date. I...I think I'm ready to fall in love with you."

"Then let's do it."

She peered over at him, lips agape with surprise. She hadn't expected much at all, but certainly not that. "What?"

"When we get back to the village, I'll take you on a date, more if things go well. We can take it as slow as you want," he told her, turning to lay on his side, facing her. He watched as she cuddled further into the comforter, only a peek of her face in his view. She was actually kinda cute through all those worn and torn layers. "I don't think I can let you go this time."

"Really?"

"Anything for you."

She ducked her head down to stare at the hardwood beneath her feet. She was overwhelmed by how nice he was being. Normally, it didn't go like this. Things normally got sexual so quick there wasn't even a chance for these sorts of conversations. It was just different with Kakashi. She could say no to him and expect better, because she knew he could deliver. "No one has ever treated me like this before."

He smiled. "Well, it's about time someone did."

"Can you hold me?"

"Come on." He lifted his arm up with the covers attached so she could crawl over and burrow herself next him, tucked right against his side. He rested his arm around her shoulders and held her close to his chest. Things were looking good for the both of them. Better than they had in a long time.

He wished this kind of thing could last forever. The beating of her heart, the laughter in her voice, the shine in her eyes. He just wished he could have bottled it all up and held it close to him for the rest of his life. 

But he waited too long, and the opportunity slipped from his grasp.

______

The pair fought hard. Kakashi was better than her, everyone knew that. The enemy targeted her for that reason. It was clear as day that she was important to Kakashi, and the enemy quickly caught onto that. He was quick to bring the knife to her neck, pressing the woman’s back tightly to his chest. The blade stung her skin, already piercing the flesh from the bit of pressure he applied.

She cried out, feeling a trail of blood begin running down her neck. Her nails clawed at his arm, desperate to get him to release her from his clutches, but he persisted. One hand held onto her chin tightly, keeping her face from thrashing, and the other continued to apply more and more pressure into the blade. 

For the first time in a long time, she found herself feeling unrestricted fear. She was scared. Scared for her life. She’d never been in this situation before, feeling so completely and utterly helpless like a deer caught in the headlights. Kakashi was right there, she should have known everything was going to be okay. After all, she had the village’s strongest veteran on her side.

It wasn’t the pain that caused the tears to bubble up in the corners of her eyes, no, it was Kakashi. The way his eyes darted over to the them, and she could feel his heart beginning to race, the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end, and the fear creeping up into his heart. He never wore his heart on his sleeve. He was so closed off, sometimes she could only get a wisp of emotion from him, especially the ones that showed such vulnerability. 

Now it all seemed to come tumbling out like a landslide. She was drowning in fear, his and her own. 

“Let her go,” he called out, practically pleading with the man across from him, but it was in vain. 

“Like I’d listen to some filthy leaf shinobi,” the spy replied angrily. He felt so hot, burning up with so much anger she wanted to throw up. What had they done to upset him this badly? Her jaw was starting to ache from being held so tightly, and she swore she could taste blood running down her throat. This was bad. This was so terribly, miserably bad. 

Kakashi stood there, his hands hovering at his sides, unknowing of what to do. She was already bleeding out all over the collar of her shirt. If he made a single move, the man could easily finish the job with one fatal swipe. The copy nin felt cornered. Hopeless. What was there left to do? He’d let the love of his life fall in the hands of some petty criminal. 

Come on, think of something. Anything. Just think of something.

“What? You upset I’ve got your little girlfriend here?”

God, he was so desperate. The man taunting him didn’t help at all. He just felt himself spiralling deeper into hopelessness. He bargained, “Please, just let her go. I’ll give you whatever you want.” 

It wouldn’t work though. This man was set in his ways, and there was no changing that. He came into this fight knowing exactly what he wanted to do. And he was going to finish the job. 

“This is for what you shinobi have done to my people,” he sneered before she felt the knife dip further into her neck, sliding painfully across her throat. He dropped her head from his grasp, and as soon as he had, her body crumbled down to the ground. She collapsed in a bleeding heap on the dirt. 

The criminal quickly ran into the forest behind them, getting lost among the trees and the bushes within seconds. None of that mattered though. Kakashi could only run over to her limp body lying there on the ground, sputtering and coughing on thick blood filling her throat and lungs. Her cheeks and lips painted red now from spitting so much up. He fell to his knees beside her body, and for the first time in a long time, he felt a tear drip down his face.

She cried, hot tears running down her cheeks into the dirt on either side of her head. She cried for her pathetic self, having been attacked and injured in this way. She cried for Kakashi, feeling the pain and sadness, the panic, radiating off his form. She took in every emotion he was feeling, wanting to savor being with him for as long as she had, to fully take him in one last time. 

“Y/N, it’s gonna be okay,” he whispered, his hands running over her hair and cheek, smearing blood on her skin and his fingers. “We’ll bring you back to the village. The Hokage can fix you.” His words were so soft into the air, like if he spoke any louder he would hurt her.

They both knew that none of what he was saying was true. She was as good as dead.

She lifted her hand weakly to sit on his other hand. “I…” The woman took a labored breath.. “Love you, Kashi.”

“No, no, no. Don’t say that,” he hushed her, feeling his heart grow heavier in his chest with every second that passed, every look at her bloody neck and face, her laboring chest as she took hopeless breaths. He was falling apart in this moment, desperate for fate to change, for her to magically be better. He choked, “You can’t die, Y/N.”

“It’s okay.” Her words were slurred and hard to hear, liquid bubbling up in her throat to the point she was almost incomprehensible. “I love you,” she confessed once again. She wanted those to be her last ever words to him, the words he would remember for the rest of his life. To know someone out there loved him more than anything else.

He had to know that he was her everything. He was the best thing that ever happened to her, and she was going to miss him so terribly wherever her soul went after this. She just wished there was more time to tell him everything she felt. Yet, time was passing faster than she thought, and all those words felt impossible.

“I love you, too. You have to live for me. Just keep breathing, it's going to be okay.”

“It...hurts.”

More misery erupted his chest, and he found himself wanting to scream. Tears dripped steadily down both his cheeks now as he watched this woman die in front of him, one of the only people he truly needed in his life. “I know, baby, I know. I’m sorry I let this happen to you.”

She nodded faintly, her eyes beginning to close. He was starting to panic. Was this his last moment to say goodbye? Their time together was so short, how was this fair? He’d already lost everyone he ever cared about, and now this? He felt like the gods were laughing down at him and his misfortune. 

“You were the best thing that ever happened to me. I don’t know how I’ll do this without you.”

She didn’t respond, but she was still breathing. 

“Y/N, please.”

And he watched as her chest fell still and her labored breaths were silent on his ears. He found himself gathering her form up against his chest, her head cradled in the crook of his neck, just sobbing into her hair, weeping for a long lasting love gone in an instant. 

 He carried her body home that day himself. Something he never anticipated happening, but should have prepared for. He always thought he was going to watch as someone else carried her home to him, death long gone before he had the chance to see. He never thought it would be right in front of him. He thought he could protect her, save her from the clutches of fate. He was so wrong.

Kakashi was alone once again.

[closedafterdark]

What's your greatest sex fantasy involving mommy eunbi?

You wake up from a quick nap to find a comfortable pleasure radiating from between your legs. Removing the blanket from your body, you find a beautiful busty vixen, nuzzling your hardening cock with her soft cheek.

She smiles, giving a deep kiss on your tip.

“Goodmorning, baby.” she said softly, her tone warm and full of affection despite the fact she was stroking your cock with her face.

“E-Eunbi? What’s going on?” you asked.

“Mommy told you she wanted to get fucked, remember baby? I waited for you downstairs.” It didn’t take you very long to recover from your sleepiness, a woman between your legs does have that effect on you.

“Mommy’s sad you dreamt about sleepingwith that whore Lee Saerom, baby. Aren’t I your only mommy?” she asked, using her cute, small left hand to grab the base of your cock and pump you up and down, watching curiously as you begin to pulse and strengthen in her warm embrace.

“Oh fuck, mommy…” you moaned out, her hand sending the first torrent of pleasure coursing through your body.

“Mommy’s going to use you to burn off her anger and stress. I hope you’re ready, baby.” Eunbi said in a soft, whisper-like tone. You noticed an edge of frustration in her voice. It was safe to say she was not happy you kept her waiting.

“If it’s mommy, I’m always ready.”

A shy smile appears on Eunbi’s face. She gives you several slow, tight strokes before she rises from between your legs. Saerom and Eunbi were only an inch apart in height. While Saerom had longer limbs and a tight, model-like body, Eunbi was on the curvier side of the two. Her thighs were a lot thicker and the obvious difference between the two was no piece of clothing could truly hide the outline of her chest. You held onto her wide hips, rubbing them slowly as you enjoyed her warm, smooth skin. Eunbi has ridden you many times, but you could never truly prepare yourself for the first time she lowers herself onto you.

Eunbi’s shorter hair length doesn’t give off the disheveled look Saerom had whenever you two had sex. She brings her small hand to her face and bites a fingertip, the warm smile on her lips anything but - the cute mole under her eye the only source of relief from her seductive gaze as Eunbi straddles you naked.

She gives you a seductive wink before removing herself from your body. You sighed, slightly disappointed you weren’t currently inside her. Yet you managed to smile, appreciating the curviness of her body and her hanging, full round breasts as she opens up the nightstand and retrieves an object from it.

Eunbi doesn’t let you see what she got from the drawer, instead covering your face with her body until you feel your wrists tied to the headboard of her bed. The soft, silky fabric was wrapped around your wrists. Not too tight, not too loose. Kind of like her pussy.

“So it’s going to be that kind of stress relief.” you said, slightly teasing her as you knew what was going to happen.

“Mommy needs to de-stress. You’re going to get it rough, baby. This just helps make certain I won’t be slowed down while I fuck you.” Eunbi said with a lust-filled smile on her lips.

Eunbi was never the type to enjoy slow, passionate-filled sex. She loved it rough, wanting to be in control and using you for her own pleasure. You certainly held no complaints - not that you ever would. There was nothing hotter to you than a woman who knows what she wants and is not shy to admit it. Those thoughts are short lived, however, as Eunbi raises her body swiftly and in one fluid motion, grabs your cock with her small hand and impales herself on it.

Not a second was wasted. It only takes a second for you to fully be inside her body. Eunbi’s loud gasp at your entrance is short-lived as she raises her body again, doing this several times until she is taking your cock in and out at a rapid pace. Your hard shaft is only slightly visible as it appears and disappears, her movements holding zero regard for you or your comfort.

Expecting her to brace herself on your chest for support, Eunbi surprises you once more by wrapping her sexy, slim fingers around your neck. She squeezes you, applying a firm pressure that slightly constricts your airflow as her large, full breasts bounce up and down while she rides you. Anger and lust filled Eunbi’s eyes, she seemed determined to work out her frustration and anger towards you with each thrust of her hips.

She bites her lower lip erotically, the sight of it seducing you. Eunbi enjoyed moaning loudly and telling you how good you feel inside her, but this time was different. She wanted to show you how hard she wanted it, how hard she wanted to fuck you while you were unable to slow her down to a comfortable pace.

“Fuck, mommy… that feels so good.” you moaned, your body quickly being overwhelmed with pleasure. While it had only been a few hours since a woman was impaling herself onto you, you noticed the differences. Eunbi cared little for how hard or fast she was going, her rough pace showing she only cares about her own pleasure.

“Mommy rides me so well…”

“Shut the fuck up.” Eunbi said, raising her hand to slap your cheek. It stinged - you remembered that she had a slapping kink whenever you two had sex. The act of doing so made her even wetter, this time being no different. Her hot juices surround your cock, adding another layer of stimulation for the both of you.

“You parade that bimbo around me like she’s better… Mommy is the only one for you, baby! I’m going to fuck you until you regret choosing her over me.”

You clenched your teeth tightly as Eunbi stopped pumping her hips up and down, choosing to instead grind herself hard on your cock, swirling her hips around in a circular motion while you were fully inside her.

“Fuck, mommy…” you moaned, struggling to keep the pleasure inside you. You wanted nothing more than to hold onto Eunbi’s wide hips, pacing her in order for you not to cum too quickly. But with your hands tied to her headboard, there was little you could do to stop her.

“You like mommy fucking you like this, don’t you baby?” Eunbi asked, trying her best to maintain her composure. But like you, Eunbi could feel the pleasure building up in her own body. Despite this, she refuses to slow down her pace, her hips swirling against yours while her hot, wet walls wrap around your shaft tightly.

“I love everything mommy does to me…” was your response.

“Everything, huh? Then enjoy mommy fucking you, baby.” Eunbi replied, lifting her hips up and down and riding you at a merciless pace.

Clenching your teeth, you bite on your lip - trying to do anything possible to distract yourself from the pleasure Eunbi was giving you. It proves to be anything but effective as she rides you ferociously, her hips working up and down your body. You feel your cock entering and exiting her pussy with each movement of her body.

“Baby! Oh fuck!” Eunbi screamed as she began to break character. She gradually begins to reach a new level of pleasure, throwing her damp, sweaty hair back while her moans continue on. Her soft hands still wrapped around your neck, Eunbi was hunched over you, her erotic words as close to you as possible. But as she continues to ride you, she straightens her back and removes her sexy hands from your neck before placing them onto your chest. You are given a perfect view of her body - despite seeing it so many times, you could never get tired of her creamy legs, her curvy yet slim upper body, and of course, her full, large breasts rocking up and down while she rides you.

The both of you lost track of time - Eunbi loved riding you; even long after you have already cum. This time would be no different. She uses every muscle in her body to give you the most amount of pleasure possible. It was as if she wanted to dedicate herself to slamming up and down your hard cock. As you noticed earlier, her anger towards you about Saerom was quickly being replaced with gasps and moans of lust that leaves her soft, beautiful lips.

“Baby, your cock feels so fucking good…” she gasps.

“Mommy… fuck, your pussy feels good too. It’s going to make me cum soon.”

“Wait, no baby… not like this.” she moaned before she stops riding you, raising her hips and turning her body around while trying to keep you still inside her.

“Fuck mommy like this.” she said, continuing to ride you once more. 

Eunbi holds onto your stomach for support as you watch your cock appear and disappear inside her tight, wet pussy lips. They wrapped themselves tightly around you - her slick juices making thick, wet squelching sounds that turn you on even more. Her plump, round ass bounced beautifully up and down your lower body. And were you not tied up, you absolutely would have given each cheek a harsh slap. Eunbi did love getting spanked, after all.

While you were disappointed she cut off her long, beautiful black hair, her shorter hairstyle gave her a more mature image. Her toned muscles of her back glistened with sweat as she arched it. You admired her toned waist that flared out into wide, fuckable hips and her large thighs that were complimented by her round ass bouncing up and down with each impact of your hips against hers. This newfound position allowed Eunbi to ride you even faster than before.

She felt tighter - something you noticed was true whenever you fucked her from behind. And while you certainly wanted her to be on her hands and knees with you in control, you could never say no to Eunbi’s dominant nature. Eunbi loved being in control, she loved setting the pace and choosing how hard she wanted to fuck you. She was never fond of other women talking to you, whether it be a close friend from before you and Eunbi got together or a cashier in a convenience store. The only women she allowed you to be with besides herself were Kang Hyewon and Miyawaki Sakura. Eunbi’s dominant personality was not just towards men - she had women wrapped around her slim, erotic-minded finger as well. While she let you fool around with Hyewon and flirt with Sakura with her permission, your thoughts returned to your girlfriend riding your cock as if her life depended on it.

“Oh my god… Mommy’s gonna cum soon, baby.” Eunbi screamed, getting your attention. Her pussy tightens around your cock even more, making you unable to hold out much longer. You watched her short bobbed haircut sway in rhythm with her body.

“M-Me too… mommy.” you managed to say. You loved Eunbi tying you up but in this moment, slightly saddened she did so as you wanted nothing more than to squeeze her asscheeks and slam them up and down a bit rougher against you.

“Baby… I’m cumming!” Eunbi screamed loudly as she released a long, drawn out moan. You feel Eunbi’s orgasm begin - her beautiful limbs flowing with pleasure as her pussy tightens around your cock.

“Mommy…” you said as you reached your own orgasm. The pleasure was too much for the both of you. You empty hot, thick semen inside her as it courses through the length of your shaft and mixes with the hot juices of her wet pussy.

You pull on the fabric currently restricting your movement, causing the bed to shake as it restricts your bound hands. You wanted to wrap your hands around Eunbi’s quivering body, to feel her orgasm shudder her completely. But she knew her way with knots, a skill you questioned where she learned it from.

Eunbi grinds her wide hips against your cock as she rides out her orgasm. A few soft moans escape her pretty lips as she tosses her head back. Fatigue was quickly filling her, she was unable to fight it any longer. She braces herself on your knees, her breathing heavy and full of exhaustion. She tried to compose herself as best she could amidst the pleasure working its way throughout her entire body.

The two of you do your best to silently bask in the wonderful afterglow of your orgasms. Eunbi straights her back as she looks at you, her eyes half-lidded while her pleasure is continuing to subside. Her mouth is slightly open as she releases one final moan of pure sexuality. As she comes down from her euphoric high, Eunbi’s eyes are fully open and she smiled sweetly at you, her face thanking you for the pleasure you gave her.

“You did so well for mommy, baby.” she said.

Regretfully, Eunbi slowly raises her hips and begins to draw out your cock from her body. She grabs both of her cheeks, spreading them as her splayed pussy lips that were wrapped around your softening shaft are fully displayed.

Both of you moaned as inch by inch of your cock is revealed. It was drenched with thick, white cum - both yours and Eunbi’s. When you are finally released from her body, you see a trail of semen leak out of her freshly fucked pussy and onto your shaft and crotch.

As Eunbi turns around and lowers her head back between your legs, you wonder where she found the energy to do so.

“Bad baby… You know better than to make a mess after fucking mommy. I guess I should clean you up, then.” Eunbi said softly, knowing full well it was out of your control. She maintains eye contact with you, as her tongue collects the mixture of her pussy juices and your semen. You could do little else besides throw your head back as she consumes your bodily fluids.

Once she finishes, she gets back on top of your body and lowers her head, puckering her lips in an attempt to ask you for a kiss. You smile, reciprocating her action as the two of you partake in a loving exchange of your feelings for one another. When she finally releases you from her headboard, you give Eunbi a deep kiss before wrapping your arms around her as the two of you drift off into sleep. The last thing you remembered is her lips draped around you as she tells you she loves you.

--

“I’m still like, super fucking mad at you for dreaming about fucking Saerom, baby. I understand if it was Hyewon or even Sakura-chan, but Lee Saerom? Ugh. There’s just something about that whore I don’t like.”

The next time you have sex with Eunbi, you find yourself holding onto her curvaceous body as a constant stream of high-pitched moans escapes her lips as your crotch smacks against her round butt while your cock grazes her pussy lips as you fuck her delicious thighs. Both of your hands squeezed Eunbi’s breasts roughly as you pin her body to the cool glass door of her shower.

The screaming hot water cascades over both of your bodies, the rainfall shower head giving her smooth, creamy skin a shiny-like quality as it flowed through her wanton body. Eunbi’s legs shake with each thrust of your cock. Her hair is plastered beautifully onto her face as you mirror her previous actions and use her body as an outlet for your own pleasure.

“Baby… fuck mommy just like that! Oh… keep fucking me!” she said.

Her nails dig into your hips as you feel her thighs instinctively tighten around your shaft. Despite not being inside her, you feel her quivering pussy tighten for you - letting you know Eunbi was enjoying you fucking her thighs just as much as you were. You released her breasts, moving your hands down to her wide hips as you refocused your thrusts.

“Baby… Keep making mommy feel good. Don’t stop!”

You buried your face into the crook of her neck as you continued to fuck her, concentrating on every single thrust in between her thighs. It caused a spike in pleasure both of you could feel in your spines. While you loved fucking Eunbi from behind, you were slightly disappointed to be unable to see her breasts rocking in pleasure. The water beads on her body quickly as you suck some of it off her neck, causing Eunbi to let out an erotic moan.

“Baby…!”

Eunbi was unable to announce her orgasm. You heard a shrill scream of pleasure as her nails claw your hips painfully. Her body quivers from the top of her head to her now curling toes. While you would normally stop thrusting into Eunbi as she cums, you were outside her, meaning you didn’t have to stop.

You loved that Eunbi had no preference when it came to sex - some days she loved pure, animalistic lust, and others she preferred it soft, more natural. Both of you would relish in the fact that no words needed to be said, your bodies would do the talking for you. Eunbi preferred to give and take - while Saerom only wanted to use you as an outlet for her own needs. She turns around and presses her lips against yours, snaking her hand to your cock and stroking you, preventing you from softening on her.

You grabbed onto her wide hips as Eunbi pushed her butt out slightly. You trace the outline of her spine with your finger before admiring her curvy hourglass figure.

“Fuck mommy more, baby.”

Dominant Eunbi was hot, but Eunbi begging you to fuck her turned you on even more.

With your left hand still holding her hip, your right hand lets go as you give her a firm smack on her butt cheek, causing Eunbi to gasp sharply.

“Ahh… baby… Mommy’s been a bad girl. I don’t think one slap is enough.”

You repeat the process, switching hands this time as you spank her other cheek. You are once again rewarded with another deliciously erotic moan. Eunbi bites on her fingertip while you feel her beginning to leak on your shaft.

“Mommy wants you to punish her, baby.”

You stroked your cock before pushing it between her full, round ass cheeks. You thrust slowly between them, the two of you letting out a satisfied moan as her juices and water from the shower have lubricated your shaft to allow you to slide easily between her soft flesh.

“There will be more time to fuck mommy’s ass cheeks later, baby. Right now, I want you to fuck me. Fuck mommy, baby.”

You hold onto your cock once more before spreading her drenched pussy lips, rubbing them slightly. Eunbi however, has had enough teasing as she pushes her ass against you, causing you to enter her body. Her fingers curled, as she felt her breasts pressed against the glass door once more.

“Mommy has been very bad… she will be punished accordingly.”

You wasted no time fucking her. Both of you didn’t want any sort of build up. From the very first entrance in her body you don’t hold back - giving her long, smooth strokes as your cock enters and exits her tight, hot pussy. Both of your desires - to fuck and be fucked make the sinful act even more pleasurable.

Eunbi opens her mouth, releasing noiseless screams as her thoughts melt away. She throws her back as she finally releases audible moans. You take this opportunity to squeeze her chin from behind, lowering your face close to her ear.

“Mommy likes her baby fucking her like this, doesn’t she.” you said while thrusting into her body.

“Fuck! Fuck yes… mommy likes… Oh! Fuck, baby! M-Mommy likes baby pounding her like t-this… Feeling y-your cock inside my tight pussy. Fuck… baby!”

You loved it. You loved hearing how Eunbi pretended to be a sweet, caring person in public - a far cry from the pleasure seeking, foul-mouthed woman she was in the bedroom.You loved cumming inside Eunbi, an act her body reacted to by tightening her pussy even more on your cock.

The two of you are fully absorbed in pleasure, the only sounds of your wet flesh colliding with each other as the uninterrupted streams of Eunbi’s moans cool down the hot shower as you roughly fucked her against the shower door. She tilts her head back, grabbing onto your hips as she pulls you in for a kiss while your cock penetrates her hot, wet pussy repeatedly. Her body is rocked with each thrust of your crotch against her pillowy soft ass.

“Baby…!” Eunbi screamed as she felt her desire and lust reach its peak. “Cum inside mommy!”

Nothing else mattered. All you cared about in this moment was your girlfriend’s wish for you to empty your semen inside her wanton body. Not Saerom, not Hyewon, not even Sakura. Eunbi was the only woman in your life you truly loved. And while she would later tell you her jaw still hurt from how hard you grabbed her chin, the quivering feeling of Eunbi’s body was what you desired most as you curled your toes and emptied hot, thick semen from your cock into her moist cavern. Each stream of your raw cum alleviates the pressure in your bodies and relaxes you both as you internally make Eunbi as yours.

Your own body slightly shudders as the two of you take awhile to recover. You were worried you hurt Eunbi - the two of you fondly recollecting the first times you were intimate. Just as you were about to speak, you hear her release a long, satisfied moan that lets you know she enjoyed the feeling of your cum inside her body and that she enjoyed your roughness.

Her eyes were filled with satisfaction, a softness to them that you usually saw when the two of you would make up over a fight. Eunbi loved you - and she knew you loved her just as much. Despite your incessant claims that you loved her more, she was thankful to have you in her life. As she turns her head and shares another deep, passionate kiss with you, your hand traces up her body and reaches her breast, firmly squeezing the soft flesh. She giggles as her tongue swipes your teeth and lets go. Both of you stared at each other, a look of fatigue in her bright, beautiful eyes that still slightly contained a hint of lust and passion. Her soft smile was one of the many things you loved about her, and as she gives you a quick peck, Eunbi finally speaks.

“Baby… we were supposed to get clean.”

--

It was Eunbi’s turn to make breakfast.

The two of you used up a lot of energy in a marathon of indulging in each other’s bodies. It was time to refuel yourselves. When you awoke from a nap the two of you took after the shower, the intoxicating aroma of sizzling bacon perfumed the air. You were greeted with Eunbi’s naked body, her cute, round butt visible as the thin fabric of an apron wrapped around her curvy body.

“Baby, I know you’re drooling from staring at my ass.”

It scared you sometimes how Eunbi didn’t need to turn around to know you were undressing her with your eyes. Although this time, she was already undressed and only wearing the apron she bought for your bedroom activities. You wipe your lower chin with the back of your hand, cursing yourself at Eunbi’s sharp skills.

The two of you enjoy the breakfast she made - which ended up being enough food for a family of four. As she raises her coffee cup and sips the amber colored liquid, she lets out a satisfied moan before turning to you.

“What do you want to do today, baby?”

“I’m… not sure. Do you have any ideas?”

“Hmm…” Eunbi said, pretending to think hard. You noticed the change in her expression as Eunbi leaves her seat and climbs onto your lap, resting comfortably on your thighs while wrapping her arms around your neck.

“Why don’t you savor the taste of mommy’s body, baby?”

“Don’t I do that everyday?” you said, pouting and rolling your eyes playfully.

“Baby…” Eunbi whined. You held onto her hips before planting tender kisses on the exposed skin of her chest and swiped the delicious line of her cleavage with your tongue.

“Does mommy want to start her morning off with dessert?” you asked, raising your eyebrow suggestively.

Eunbi nodded, the mischievous glint in her eyes appearing as she sees you catching her drift.

She pulls you closer to her as she nibbles on your lips, her tongue entering your mouth and exploring it. You caressed her soft, smooth skin before your hands rested firmly on her butt.

“Mommy wants her daily protein…” she said softly as her eyes became clouded with pleasure and lust.

You watched her lift her body off your lap as she removes your cotton boxer briefs and tosses them away. She stares at your cock hungrily, a look of satisfaction painted on her beautiful face. She bites her lower lip as your legs spread open instinctively, allowing her to sink her face into your crotch.

A comforting pleasure washes over your body as you feel her lips, tongue and mouth wrapped around your cock. It was truly an amazing feeling, with Eunbi bobbing her head up and down. One of your hands holds onto her coffee cup tightly while the other grips the back of her head as Eunbi takes your cock in and out of her hot, wet mouth.

You spread your legs more, allowing her more room as your head tilts back in pleasure. Every inch of your shaft that enters and exits her lips is coated generously with her saliva. You eventually gathered the strength to look down and find your hand holding your girlfriend’s head that is bobbing up and down. The sounds of the birds chirping and the warm sunlight rays entered the window as you enjoyed a morning blowjob from the love of your life.

You succeed in savoring the pleasure Eunbi was giving you, but knew her mouth made you powerless to resist her for too long.

“Fuck, mommy… I’m going to cum if you keep it up.” you said, knowing full well you wanted to start off a beautiful morning by cumming in her mouth.

Eunbi sucks your cock hard, her lips wrapped around the base of your shaft as she raises her head inch by inch while her tongue simultaneously runs along your underside. They retain a firm hold until the head of your cock is released with a loud pop.

“Cum in mommy’s mouth, baby. Feed me.”

While Saerom was not afraid to tell you guys loved cumming in her mouth and Hyewon didn’t particularly enjoy it, but knew it turned you on, you are reminded why Eunbi was truly the woman for you. She loved you cumming in her mouth, often telling you she needed to start off her day with it. The heavy desires the two of you had for each other fueled the passionate act she was performing between her legs.

Eunbi returned her mouth to your cock, hunger in her eyes as her lips parted effortlessly.

Your tight grip on her pink coffee mug made you afraid you would break it from the pleasure radiating from your lower body. If it were to happen, you know Eunbi wouldn’t let you touch her for a week. As you desperately tried to look for another outlet to prevent the pleasure from releasing, you accidentally looked down to find her massaging your balls while moving her tongue back and forth on the underside of your shaft.

“Mommy… fuck. I’m gonna cum.”

Eunbi’s head bobbed up and down rapidly on your cock as your orgasm finally courses from your head to your toes as you curl them and use both hands to tightly grip the back of her head and push her deeper into your crotch. Your shaft tightens, pulsing inside her mouth as it erupts and sends hot, thick semen into her mouth and throat.

Your body shivers in pleasure as you hold her head in place and your cock continues to pulse and empty your balls into her moist cavern. You didn’t care if she had trouble breathing as her head remained on your base as you savored the euphoric high. Once Eunbi feels your grip on her weakening, she releases her hold on your cock as your legs quiver from the small aftershocks. Looking up at you, her eyes formed half moon crescents. She opens her mouth and reveals her tongue and mouth painted white with your glistening freshly released cum.

She closes her mouth, tilting her head upwards and swallows - taking two gulps to do so as you watched her throat push the semen down her beautiful neck. She opens her mouth again and lets out a satisfied hum as you are greeted with her pink tongue.

Eunbi doesn’t speak a single word, her smile splayed on her slightly pouted lips as she gives you a kiss and carefully rises, turning around and untying the knots of her apron before letting it fall down her beautiful body and onto the floor. She leaves the kitchen and turns around, her plump ass still facing you as she uses her index finger and points it suggestively in a beckoning motion. You watched your girlfriend’s lusty smile as she slowly climbed up the stairs. Gathering strength from an unknown source, you quickly get out of your seat and run towards Eunbi. She giggles, trying - and failing to get a head start before you hug her from behind.

A beautiful start to the day was what you two needed - and how you wanted to spend every waking moment you could on this Earth with Kwon Eunbi.

[fleetwoodmak99]

Long Past Dawn

Eric Draven x reader

This is requested from @sister-morticia "Hi!! Can I please request an Eric Draven x reader whump with lots of hurt and comfort/worried!Eric? I need some caring fluff! Thank you!! ☺️" I had so much fun working on this!!! I'll be posting a part 2 as hcs of the aftermath soon. It will focus more on the comforting aspects. Also I’m really sorry this is long. 

WARNINGS: Panic attacks, hyperventilating, serious wounds, gun violence, mentions of blood, depression, talks of deep sadness, death, resurrection, paranoia, explosions, and fainting.

SUMMARY: It has been a year since you lost your lover, Eric Draven. While you have managed to get by, it has been extremely difficult. After having a particularly hard night, you decide it might be a good idea to go for a walk to release some steam, only to fall upon a danger situation.

Its been a entire year since you had lost the love of your life, Eric Draven.

It was around Halloween. The leaves on the trees were starting to change from green to orange and yellow as the air turned cool.

Halloween used to be Eric’s favorite time of the year. Always making a big deal about it with lots of horror movie marathons and tons of candy. Now, you had none of that.

No celebrating, no watching horror movies all night, no eating a bunch of candy, no Eric.

Even though it had been a whole year since that dark night, it still haunted your every waking thought.

Every day seemed to bring a new struggle. The worst of it being at night. The pain of losing Eric broke you down to the point where you could do nothing but spend most nights crying.

Anxiety making itself known at every turn. Always worried that the men responsible for taking the life of your lover and leaving you for dead will one day realize you aren't and come after you.

Memories of that night plagued your dreams often. Seeing flashes of T-Birds gang breaking through the door of your shared apartment and attacking you while you were cooking dinner.

The panic consuming your chest becoming too overpowering as you relived that night over and over again. Jolting awake in a pile of sweat when it became too much. Feeling your stomach turn to the sickening thoughts roaming around in your head.

You tried to calm your thoughts. You really did. But the terror that filled your chest was too powerful.

A strong force making you leave the warmth of your bed in an attempt to ease your mind. Pacing around the room, completely lost in thought.

Are they going to come after me? Will they want to harm me?

The demanding thoughts running through your head was starting to cause a wave of nausea to wash over your body.

No. They don't know you are alive. They would have come after you if they had.

You were lucky enough to get Sergeant Albrecht assigned to your case. He was the only one on the force who was kind to you.

Albrecht helped you stay under the radar until you were able to get enough money to move far, far away. The main problem being that you couldn't find a good steady income that would get you out of this hell hole while not blowing your cover, creating the never ending cycle of being trapped in the city. Being doomed to live here forever with no escape.

Still, you felt an overwhelming ache in your stomach every time you thought of Top Dollar still being out there, controlling most of the violence in the city. Hoping that the brutality won't one day unleash on you.

Knowing that it went against the rules you had started following in an attempt to protect yourself further, you decided it might be a good idea to go for a quick late night walk. Noting the dangers of what you might be doing, but it was your last attempt to ease your anxieties and distract you from the pain.

Hoping that the fresh cool air will be a jolt to your system, you grabbed a light jacket and black high tops, placing it over your pajamas and venturing out into the night.

Stepping out of the safety of the apartment building and into the bitter cold. Feeling the tip of your fingers and toes already starting to turn into ice. Still, you were determined to complete your walk as it has always been a good way of distraction you from your intrusive thoughts.

With that being said, the streets of Detroit certainly looked different at night. Feeling a thick layer of sorrow and rage in the air. It being so thick it became difficult to breath.

Choosing to ignore it, you kept walking.

A smile spreading across your lips when you see a group of children in Halloween costumes running with bags of candy in their hands, laughing as they did so.

Curiosity taking over as to why children would be out this late on Devil’s Night. Seeing as you did much worse things when you were a kid, you let it slide.

Either way, you began to have doubts if this was a good idea, deciding it might be time to head back and hide from the world once more.

Turning around and walking the other way, you could already feel a wave of relief washing over you as you made your way back only for your heart to be ripped out of your chest when a booming explosion erupted just up the road. A burst of light blinding you as the ground rumbled.

The sudden event sending you onto the ground, holding your heads up to your head in an attempt to protect yourself from the eruption.

Trying your best to focus on what exactly was happening as the light started to dim into small flames and a bundle of smoke coming from an old abandoned building.

At first, you wanted to run the other way. Knowing that this was most likely the work of Top Dollar or some other big mob boss trying to cause some havoc in an already broken city.

Yet when you tried to get up, you remained planted on the ground. Your body being completely immobilized and without breath.

As you tried getting your strength back, you started to hear a faint scream coming from up the road. Your thoughts immediately going to the children you had seen giggling to each other just moments ago.

You tried remembering which way they had went. Hoping that they were far away from the building now engulfed in flames but after hearing more yelling, you knew you had to make sure no one was hurt or worse.

With a new found determination, you felt yourself starting to grow stronger, experiencing a rush of adrenaline fueling your body.

This time when attempting to get up, you were able to get onto your feet. Your legs still feeling weak, you forced yourself not to waste time and move towards the very thing you made you shake.

Getting closer to the fire, you could start to feel the heat coming from the flames. Inspecting the building, you couldn't see anyone inside. In fact, you couldn't see anyone at all.

You thought for sure the police or at least the fire department would be on their way considering it was a Devil’s Night tradition for the whole city to burn. Yet no one was there. It was almost unnatural.

You were pulled from your thoughts when you heard not a scream but groaning, murmuring and the collusion of masses coming from the back side of another building. 

With caution, you started to make your way towards the sounds. Leaning on another building for support, gaining distance from the heat.

Hearing the unknown sounds starting to grow louder and louder, you could see the silhouette of different bodies laying on the ground. You didn't know if they were dead or unconscious.

Deciding to grab a nearby wooden stick. Just in case.

Two men suddenly bursting in front of you, struggling against each other. They rolled around the dirt floor, one trying to get the upper hand on the other. Both eventually getting up and starting to throw hands. 

You couldn't decide whether to intervene and try to break them up or start running, but once again your body worked against you. Forcing your mind to turn blank and stay in place. Making you now watch the whole thing go down.

At first glance, you couldn't recognized who the men were yet you couldn't help the strange feeling that you were meant to be here. Somehow this was related to you. You felt it deep down.

You tried analyzing them as they continued, trying your best not to be seen.

One of the men was a lot shorter than the other and had greasy shaggy dark brown hair underneath a worn out black knit hat with baggy clothes.

While the other one taller, and more muscular. Mostly wearing tight fit leather. His dark brown hair was longer than the other one, resting just above his shoulders. Black and white paint covering his face as some type of mask.

His hits being more calculated and precise going against the others, who was becoming more and more sloppy by the minute.

As the two men start to taunt each other. Somehow neither seemed to notice you as you stood there in fear. Your heart sinking when you hear one of the men starting to speak. You recognized that voice, clear as day.

The short man was Skank. He was apart of T-Bird's gang, who worked for none other than Top Dollar.

Shit. You need to leave now.

Finally, you were able to slowly make yourself move backwards as your feet stumbled on themselves. You tried your best not to make any noise, not even risking breathing. You couldn't help your eyes from being glued to them.

"I-I know you. You're that guy we had to straighten out cause you and your partner were protesting Top Dollar's tenant relocation program. B-But you're supposed to be dead. We killed you, dead." Skank mumbled, slightly laughing in disbelief at the end.

This made you stop. Your body turning cold.

You knew exactly what he was talking about. Remember a few months before the attack, gathering other tenants to protest. But that wasn't what was making your nerves go wild.

It was who Skank was fighting with.

No. There was no way. He has to be talking about someone else.

You didn't even want to think of the possibility of seeing Eric again. Knowing that there was no possible way that could ever happen.

But why did he look so familiar? When you heard the strangers voice, deep down you knew.

"I guess not all things that die, stay dead." His voice was deep and raspy, showing off his classic sarcasm that reminded you of Eric before his death.

How could this be happening? There was no way that could be Eric. No way.

As your thoughts battled it out in your head as to if this was a dream or not, Skank began to laugh hysterically like he was losing his mind as well. Slowly starting to move his hand behind his back to retrieve the loaded gun resting on his waistband.

While you hadn't noticed, Eric did. Giving off an eerie smile before springing into action, darting right for Skank.

Not being quick enough as a gun shot ring out, causing you to let out a small shriek. Placing your hands upon your ears in an attempt to shelter them from the sharp pain booming through it. Dropping the wooden stick in the process. Closing your eyes to try and hid yourself, knowing fully well that it was useless.

Not being able to contain your breath anymore, you started to hyperventilate. Trying your best to get your breath under control but finding it almost impossible as it kept escaping you.

Not even realizing that the two men had turned their attention to you. Eric taking a second glance as he couldn't believe his eye. He was in complete disbelief that it was you standing right there. Eric assumed you died as well that night, seeing you there made his blood drain from his face.

As the pain in your ears started to die down, you slowly forced your eyes open. Blinking a few times before getting a clear picture as to what was going on. Seeing the two men wrestling to take control of the gun. Eric grabbing at Skank's face, trying to block his vision. Somehow Eric seemed completely fine for being just fired upon.

Was he hit at all? Was he hurt?

Panic fueling your body to run but when you looked at Eric, you knew that wasn't going to be possible.

Now you needed answers.

What was he doing here? How is he alive? How long has he been alive? A day? The whole year?

Not knowing if it was the sense of curiosity or the excitement of seeing Eric in the flesh that made your heart pound. Being completely convinced that this was all just a dream. 

Hearing another bang piercing through your ears once again, causing your body to flinch out of instinct. All this followed by a tight pressure coming from the side of your thigh. Even though it wasn’t painful, it was still enough to send your body to the cold ground. 

At first not realizing why until you began to see a pool of red liquid starting to collect underneath your leg. Knowing fully well now that you were Skank's target. Lucky for you, he has terrible aim. 

Hearing who you assumed to be Eric and Shank struggle against each other once again but you couldn't find the courage to look away from your wound.

Now feeling a strong burning sensation beginning to form on the right side of your thigh, pinpointing exactly where a bullet had ripped itself through your leg. Leaving a nickel sized hole in its place.

Quickly placing your hand on it, in an attempt to somehow ease the intense feeling that throbbed through your entire leg. Feeling a wet sticky substance slipping through your fingers.

Your body starting to jitter uncontrollably as darkness began to form around the edges of your vision. The world starting to go blurry around you.

A comforting hand suddenly resting on top of yours, causing you to jerk yourself back. Only for you to make eye contact with the worried gray eyes of Eric.

A sense of relief washing over you, a small smile resting on your lips. Quickly fading, when he applied a slight pressure to your injury, trying to stop the bleeding. Causing the pain to become more intense.

Your thoughts moving to Skank, hoping he was no longer a threat. You scanned the area, your sight landing on him running down the alleyway and disappearing as he rounded the corner of a building. Your vision starting to become more and more faint as you tried to focus.

You felt a gentle hand caressing your cheek, pulling your sight back to Eric.

"I need you to stay awake, y/n." You could hear the panic in Eric’s voice.

You tried to respond.

You wanted to tell him you were trying, that you missed him, that you loved him. Yet nothing but a slight whine came out.

The energy starting to leave your body as a dull ache started to form at the back of your head. Losing all control off your body as it went limp.

The darkness completely consuming your vision as your heart pounded.

Eventually not fighting it anymore and allowing sleep to take over as the world disappeared. The last thing you remembered was hearing Eric calling your name.

[c-optimistic]

Soulmate au?

i.

“Do you believe in soulmates?” Kara asks suddenly one day. They’re in Lena’s office, having a rather late lunch, and had lapsed into a rather awkward silence when Kara blurts out her question.

(Mending friendships is slow, tedious work.

But much like all her other goals, Lena doggedly pursues it, determined to see it through.)

“No, I’m a scientist,” Lena laughs, putting her fork down. “Why do you ask? Do you think you found your soulmate?”

She doesn’t know why she asks. She doesn’t want the answer to that. She doesn’t want to hear about Kara’s dating life. Ask her why, and she’d vehemently deny knowing the reason, but the truth is that the thought of Kara with someone else sends poisonous shards through Lena’s chest, twists her all up inside, and leaves her feeling like her world has crashed around her.

(It’s not dramatic at all.)

“What? No!” Kara says to Lena’s ultimate relief. “No, it’s for an article.”

“You’re writing about soulmates?”

“Well, not exactly. There’s this woman here in National City who claims she can find your soulmate.”

“Oh?” Lena says, raising an eyebrow. Kara nods.

“Apparently, she can see the three ‘Marks’ of soulmates.” When Lena just eyes Kara skeptically, Kara grins and shrugs. “I’m serious! She claims there’s the Mark of Pain, the Mark of Skin, and the Mark of String.”

“...right,” Lena says, stretching out the word and smiling when Kara laughs. “So how does it work?”

“Well, I’ve only talked to her on the phone. But she says soulmates are attached in different ways. And she can sense it. Even if we ordinary people can’t. Like, her string theory—”

“—I don’t think that’s what the string theory is, Kara,” Lena interrupts, but Kara’s on a roll.

“I know, I know. But she says she can see it. Red thread, tied from one person to another. Or tattoos on people’s skin that matches in some way, and only she can see.” Kara shrugs. “She has a pretty good Yelp rating. Everyone says she’s gotten it right.”

“That seems more like confirmation bias than anything. And of course she’s making money off this.”

Kara smiles warmly at her, her eyes soft behind the glasses she didn’t technically need. She looks at Lena in a way that makes Lena heart skip a beat or two, that makes her momentarily forget about the past year of difficulty between them. Suddenly, she’s only looking at her best friend, and she’s a little bit in love.

“So you don’t believe in soulmates?” Kara confirms, her smile turning wistful.

“Why? Do you?” She doesn’t know why she asks. She doesn’t really want to know the answer, sure that any response Kara gives will just be a kick to the chest. Another crack in her heart.

She really wishes she hadn’t asked.

“I don’t know,” Kara responds after a short pause, clearly giving it a lot of thought. “But I hope soulmates do exist.” Kara lets out a laugh. “Maybe this woman can lead me to mine.”

(And there it is, that kick to the chest and crack in her heart she expected.)

Lena looks away, pretends to be startled by the time, but even as Kara gathers her things to leave, she secures Lena’s promise to look into this mystical soulmate finder together.

It’s a promise Lena is sure she’s going to regret.

ii. pain

“So, it’s weird that she refuses to see us in person, right?” Lena asks, looking to Alex for some support, which the elder Danvers is only too happy to give. “It’s odd. Why doesn’t she meet us in person?”

Kara shoots them both an impatient look, clearly not impressed with their negativity. “She doesn’t want to be affected by our energies while she’s working,” she explains, checking her phone before looking up and making sure they are at the right place.

“Our energies?” Alex asks dubiously, making a face at Lena behind Kara’s back. She times it poorly; before she can school her features into a neutral expression, Kara has turned to look at them again, her eyes narrowing.

“Being skeptical and being dismissive are two very different things,” Kara scolds them, sounding just a bit testy. “There’s nothing wrong with keeping an open mind, even about things you don’t or can’t understand.”

Alex opens her mouth, clearly about to start a debate, but Lena butts in, silencing Alex with a hand on her shoulder and giving Kara a small, placating smile. “You’re right, we’re sorry. We’ll behave,” she says, squeezing Alex’s shoulder until she lets out a grunt in the affirmative. When Kara is seemingly satisfied, nodding at them briskly, she continues leading them down the street, eyes on the storefronts. Alex, however, elbowed Lena hard the second Kara’s back was turned.

“What’s wrong with you?” she hisses, elbowing Lena again. “We’ll behave?”

“She’s right, there’s plenty we don’t understand, plenty out there in the universe we can’t make sense of, so maybe keeping an open mind isn’t the worst thing—”

“—oh, shut up, you know very well you’re only taking her side for one reason, and—”

“I can hear you two, you know,” Kara says loudly, interrupting their hushed argument. “Also, we’re here.”

She stops and looks up at the rundown tea shop, nestled between an old record store that had clearly seen better days, and a very busy video game and comic book store. Lena tugs on her coat when a few kids eye her as they enter the store, ducking their heads together and beginning to whisper.

“All right, well explain where here is,” Alex says, stepping closer to her sister. “You haven’t actually explained anything.”

Kara nods, gesturing for them to enter the tea shop, the three of them finding an empty table and huddling around it, perching on tiny, uncomfortable chairs. The tea shop is, for the most part, a place Lena would never have entered on her own volition. It’s frilly and pink, photos of cats everywhere, with sticky tables and stifling heat. Yet, there’s also an odd comfort to the place: it smells heavenly, the aroma of freshly brewed tea mixing with a variety of sweets, all neatly arranged at the display next to the register. The customers also look like they’re at home, nestled in corners reading books, tapping away on computers, and even on what looks to be a very engaging date.

It’s nice. Even if she’s skeptical of the reason they came here, she’s glad she’s come across this place. She thinks she may even come by again, especially if their tea is any good.

“So apparently, there are two people who work here who are soulmates,” Kara explains, motioning for Alex and Lena to lean towards her. Lena finds herself swallowing a little when the aroma of the tea shop is mixed with Kara’s heavenly scent. Her mind goes a little fuzzy, and she knows she has a silly expression on her face because Alex is smirking at her. Kara, of course, focused on work and on her explanation, notices nothing. “They have the Mark of Pain. We’re here to observe, see if they actually can feel each other’s pain.”

“I don’t know if I’d like that one,” Alex says conversationally, leaning back in her rickety chair and eyeing the register and the zoned-out employee behind it. “I mean, can you imagine? In my line of work? Kelly would always be in pain.”

“You think Kelly is your soulmate?” Lena asks, a little surprised by the easy way Alex has said it. Like it’s a fact. Like it’s just true. “What about Maggie? How do you know?”

“Who says you have to have one soulmate?” Alex shoots back, shrugging. “Kara’s my soulmate too. Platonically, of course. You, even.” She grins when Lena’s eyes widen, when she opens and closes her mouth wordlessly, confused and overwhelmed and unsure. “What? Just because I don’t believe in this mystic lady doesn’t mean I don’t believe in the concept of soulmates. But who says it has to be romantic? Or that it’s just one person?”

“So what is it?”

“People in your life who enter it and just...stay. Your found family. Chosen family.” She looks away from the employee at the register and smiles at Kara. “Kara agrees. Right?”

Kara, who has pulled out her notebook and has taken a few notes down about the employee at the register, nods distractedly. “We were drunk when we came up with this,” she explains, meeting Lena’s eyes and blushing slightly for whatever reason. “But it just seems—well, it seems silly to think that in the entire universe there’s one person who’d be your perfect partner. That’s also really sad,” she mumbles. “If that were true, who’s to say my soulmate didn’t die with Krypton?” She shrugs awkwardly. “I think sometimes people are just connected. Meant to be in each other’s life. In whatever form that may be.” Kara looks at Lena carefully, her mouth opening and her cheeks reddening further. “Like—” But Lena doesn’t get to hear what Kara wants to say. At that moment, another employee comes in from the back entrance, looking slightly distracted, eyes on the employee behind the register.

“Look,” Alex says suddenly, sitting up straighter as the employee walks by, bumping into a table roughly. “Whoa,” she says, and Lena silently agrees.

Because just as the employee mumbles a curse and rubs their side, blushing furiously and looking embarrassed, the zoned-out employee at the register winces in pain, rubbing that same spot.

A point, Lena thinks, in the strange mystic woman’s favor.

iii. skin

Lena begins researching the strange mystic woman in earnest.

(In her free time, far away from Kara’s eyes or Alex’s judgment.)

Everything about her is frustratingly perfect—perfect enough that Lena is suspicious. The woman’s website is well-made and professional, littered with testimonials and photos of weddings. There are a range of services with a range of prices, and no matter how much Lena digs, she doesn’t see a single bad thing about the woman.

It’s the internet, she thinks as she scrolls through Google reviews, grimacing at the emojis that filled each comment. Surely someone, somewhere would use the anonymity to their advantage to say something less than complimentary.

No one is perfect, Lena thinks to herself. Which means one of two things: this woman is a fraud (more likely) or she has some sort of ability to force people to write nice things about her on the internet (Lena’s had a few drinks when this becomes a plausible option to her).

She doesn’t remember dialing the number on the website, but the next thing she knows, someone with an airy voice is on the other end, asking her if she’s ready to meet her soulmate.

“You’re a fraud, did you know that?” Lena asks. “It’s cruel what you’re doing, really. Telling people there’s someone perfect out there who loves them for them. That’s unkind.”

“Oh, Lena!” the woman says, the airy tone dropping for a moment. “I mean,” she continues, the affectation back, “I’ve been expecting a call from you, Lena Luthor.”

“Oh, have you? Can you see the future as well as the red string connecting people?”

The woman chuckles, and she sounds vaguely familiar. Lena’s drunk mind chalks it up to being drunk. “I can’t see the future,” she says, sounding amused. “I just knew you would contact me after Kara Danvers began her article on my business.”

“Oh?” Lena mutters sarcastically.

“The answer to your question is yes,” she says, and Lena chokes on nothing.

“I didn’t ask a question. The ‘oh’ was rhetorical.”

“No, Lena Luthor, the question you called me to ask. I’ll give it to you, free of charge: yes.”

“I don’t have a question,” Lena denies, not liking the way the woman on the other end of the phone laughs. “Is this how you tricked the others? Tell them what they want to hear, and they write you obnoxiously positive reviews?”

“So you admit it’s what you wanted to hear,” the woman shoots back with glee, that stupid tone gone, and for the second time, Lena swears she knows this voice. “I mean,” she clears her throat, “I haven’t tricked anyone. I just tell people what I see. Didn’t you see the truth at the tea shop?”

“I think there’s a perfectly logical explanation for that,” Lena argues. “Phantom pains, an old bruise, sympathetic—”

“—okay, you’re skeptical,” the woman interrupts, “I understand. What if I show you a second example?”

Lena thinks about it for a moment. “Fine. But on my terms. I want you to find Jess’s soulmate.” She’s just drunk enough that this seems like a wonderful idea. On the other end of the phone, the woman sounds like she’s hacking up a lung.

“Your secretary?” she asks incredulously, once again sounding familiar.

“How did you—”

“—okay, I will do this,” the woman interrupts, rushing to speak. “In two days, you will be able to see her Mark as well as the Mark of her soulmate, just like I do.”

“That makes no sense, what are you—” But she never finishes her sentence. The woman hangs up, leaving Lena looking at her phone, trying to blink away her shock.

By the time she wakes up the following morning, groaning at her hangover and nearly telling Kara she loves her when the reporter shows up to her apartment with coffee and pastries, Lena’s forgotten all about the call.

///

Jess lingers every time she steps into Lena’s office. She eyes Lena oddly, stares at her hands, and shifts awkwardly on her feet. After the third time, Lena rolls her eyes, sets her pen down, and gives Jess her full attention.

“Is there something wrong?”

“No!” Jess says immediately, then grimaces. “Well, yes. But nothing bad. Not really.” Lena waits her out, knowing Jess will get to the point eventually. “My partner and I, well, we had plans this weekend. We’re supposed to leave straight from work, so I was—”

“—oh, right. Your time off. Yes, of course, feel free to leave early.” She picks up her pen, thinking this is the end of the conversation.

“Um, actually Ms. Luthor, I was wondering if you’d be willing to meet him.”

“Meet who?” Lena asks distractedly.

“My partner.” Something must show on Lena’s face when she drops her pen a second time and looks up at Jess, because she hurries to explain. “He’s a huge fan of your work. And he’s a big part of my life. I’d like you to meet him. If you can.” She tacks on the last three words almost as an afterthought, not quite meeting Lena’s eyes.

“Yes, of course. We can—”

“—wonderful, he’s right outside,” Jess says, smiling wide, rushing out of Lena’s office. A moment later, she returns, a tall, charming looking man following close behind.

She introduces them, and for the next hour, they chat amicably, discussing Lena’s work and Jess’s exceptionalism, and the weekend getaway plans. Except, Lena’s not quite sure she retains any of the information she gleans from the conversation—in fact, if you asked her, she couldn’t even remember if Jess had ever mentioned where she and her partner were even going.

Because when Jess’s partner reaches out to shake Lena’s hand, his sleeve rides up just slightly, revealing a small tattoo with Jess’s name on the inside of his wrist.

Lena doesn’t need to see a similar tattoo, with Jess’s partner’s name, on the inside of Jess’s wrist for her to realize what she’s come across.

“Those tattoos are quite nice,” Lena says when they get up to leave, Jess’s partner leaving her office first. “The artist who did them is quite talented.”

Jess gives Lena an odd look. “I’m sorry, Ms. Luthor,” she says, “what tattoo?”

Lena gestures to Jess’s wrist, but when she looks down, the mark is gone.

And that is a second point in the mystic woman’s favor.

iv. string

Lena absolutely, positively, without a single shred of doubt, does not believe in soulmates. The concept is ludicrous. To think that in a massive and constantly expanding universe, the atoms that make her are somehow destined to be near the atoms that make up someone else is an entirely ridiculous conclusion. She does not believe in the concept of a perfect partner, of someone she is meant to be with, of an individual to whom she is forever connected.

(And to be quite frank, there’s a bit of fear too. She doesn’t want soulmates to exist. For one, she’s worried about the prospect that the universe would pay back her family’s misdeeds by forever ensuring Lena does not have a soulmate. And for another, the far more terrifying option, she does have a soulmate, and that poor soul is bound to her of all people.

What an awful, horrible fate—nothing she’d wish on her worst enemy, least of all the person she’s supposedly destined to be with.)

Lena does not believe in soulmates. She doesn’t.

What she does believe in is Kara.

(Kara, who had her back from the day they met. Kara, who had saved her life more than once. Kara, who made mistakes—just like Lena—but had met Lena halfway and worked hard to fix things between them. Kara, who for all her flaws and missteps, is Lena’s best friend in the world, the one person who has seen Lena for Lena, from the moment they first locked eyes.

Kara, who Lena is hopelessly in love with; Kara, who has never shown interest in women; Kara, who has recently taken up the really rather unfortunate habit of telling Lena she loves her every chance she gets.

And then there’s Lena, who swallows down what she wants to say and instead smiles bitterly as she intones, “I love you too, you’re the best friend I’ve ever had.”)

Lena is pretty smart. She can say so without sounding obnoxious about it, because it’s a generally accepted fact. She’s pretty smart, and she was dumb enough to fall in love with someone who could never love her back the same way. She rather thinks that if soulmates are indeed real, then that wouldn’t have been possible. Then again, perhaps that’s not entirely true.

(She thinks about Alex’s notion of what soulmates are or could be, of Kara’s thoughts on connection, and she thinks that maybe—even if she wants it to—she isn’t meant to be with Kara romantically. If there’s anyone in her life who is her family, anyone Lena has chosen, anyone she has picked again and again and again, it’s Kara.

It will always, romantically or not, be Kara.

And if that’s not the definition of a soulmate, Lena’s not quite sure what is.)

For the second time in less than a week, Lena finds herself dialing a number from a well-maintained website.

“Lena Luthor,” the airy voice says as soon as she picks up. “I admit I’m surprised you’re calling. I gave you proof and your answer. What more can you need?”

“These soulmates you find,” Lena says, trying not to let her disappointment seep into her tone too much, “have you ever thought maybe you’re matching people who aren’t meant to be together romantically?”

The mystical woman makes a noise that sounds like a cross between a snort of disbelief and a huff of amusement. “You’re—wow,” she says, dropping the silly tone, and if her voice was just a tiny bit higher, Lena would swear it was— “Listen. Yes, platonic soulmates are a thing. They’re great. We love them. Some people only have platonic soulmates. But you are not platonic soulmates with—”

“—yes but how do you know something like that, that seems hard to—”

“—it’s like talking to a brick wall,” the woman interrupts, and Lena can hear some sort of scuffle from the other end, as if someone is trying to pull the phone out of the woman’s grasp. “Look,” the woman says after a second, sounding a bit out of breath, “I’m going to tell you something I have never told anyone else. Of the three Marks, the most clear and obvious sign of two people belonging romantically together is the Mark of String.” The woman pauses, and Lena would almost swear that there’s someone else speaking to her. “Here’s what you should do. And I do this free of charge for you, because I’m highly invested in this,” she chuckles as if this is a great joke and then barrels on, “so listen carefully. Tonight, go see the woman you love. Spend the night. If you wake up with a red string tied from your pinky to hers, then you can rest assured she’s the one.”

“I don’t know if—”

“—Lena,” the woman admonishes, and Lena frowns, finally recognizing the voice. “Trust me on this.”

She goes through with it, trusting the not-so-mystical woman.

Except, when Kara sneaks towards the bed she gallantly gave up for Lena, a piece of red thread hanging from her hand, Lena sits up and clicks on the bedside table light.

“You have a lot of explaining to do,” Lena tells Kara.

v.

They’re sitting on opposite ends of the couch, facing each other, Kara sitting with her knees pulled up to her chest, and Lena trying hard (and failing) to act relaxed.

“So?” she prods, gesturing to the red thread still tied to Kara’s pinky finger. “Want to explain your practical joke?”

“Joke?” Kara says in shock, shaking her head immediately. “No, Lena, it’s not a joke. Not even a little bit.”

Lena’s heart skips a few beats at that, but she maintains an impassive expression. “I don’t understand then. Why would you—”

“—remember a few months back, when I told you I loved you for the first time?” Kara interrupts, jumping to her feet and pacing in front of the couch. She doesn’t wait for Lena to respond. “It took me weeks to gather the courage to tell you. And I’d memorized the whole speech, and at the end you just looked at me like I was speaking to someone else. You told me you loved me as a friend.”

“Right, because you meant it as friends, you…” Lena trails off. “Wait.”

An odd look passes over Kara’s face, something like amusement and exasperation. “Alex told me that I needed to be direct with you. But I—even when I tried, it was like you didn’t hear me.”

(Lena thinks back to all the times Kara had said I love you and she wonders if she’s just heard what she expected to hear and not what Kara was actually trying to say.

Her heart begins to pound in her chest at the very possibility.

Did Kara really....?)

“So what? You decided to recruit Nia to pretend to be a mystical woman? To prove what exactly?”

Kara, surprisingly, looks smug. “You recognized her. I knew it. She was way off script on the phone call, and I tried to get her off the phone but she—”

“—Kara, focus. So the whole soulmate thing was fake?”

Kara winces at that. “Well. Yes, technically.” She stills, coming to a stop several feet in front of Lena. “I asked a few people to help out.”

“Wait, so the two people in the tea shop…” Lena trails off, eyes wide.

“Right, two DEO agents. They should definitely look into acting as a career, I mean they had me convinced, and I knew it was fake—”

“—and Jess?” Lena asks, feeling vaguely overwhelmed.

“Special temporary tattoos made by the DEO, easy to rub off, for both her and her partner.” When Lena is silent a touch too long, Kara rushes to explain. “I mean, it was very hard to convince her to do it. She’s incredibly protective of you, she deserves some kind of raise.”

“She does,” Lena agrees absently, getting to her feet and gesturing towards the red string in Kara’s hand. “And this?”

“We weren’t supposed to get to this. I’d hoped the first two would convince you Nia could honestly see soulmates. I was going to tie it to your pinky. The other end would be connected to me, of course,” she raises her hand with an awkward wave. “But you, um. Caught me.”

Lena bites her lip, marvelling at the sheer amount of work Kara and the others put into this. “Who made the websites? They were perfect.”

“Brainy made them,” Kara explains, a frown appearing on her lips and a crease forming between her brows. “Though I guess he made it too well, since you were suspicious of it.”

“Kara, I—” Lena’s not sure what she wants to say, and she’s glad when Kara interrupts her, taking a step closer, looking at her with an earnest expression.

“Listen,” she says, determination etched onto her features. “I love you. In a romantic way. And if there are soulmates out there, then you’re mine. That’s all this was.”

Lena feels tears well up in her eyes, blurring her vision, and she wants to duck her head, to hide, but Kara is there and saying everything she’s ever wanted to hear, and so instead she just closes the last of the distance between them and wraps her arms around Kara, holding her close, face burrowing into Kara’s neck. “All of this just to say I love you seems a bit dramatic,” she whispers, feeling Kara’s arms go around her waist, clutching her tighter.

“I figured you’d need something dramatic to believe it’s true,” Kara jokes, loosening her hold just a bit so that she can pull back and look at Lena.

“You’re my soulmate too, you know. If there are things like that out there. It was always just you.”

Kara grins brilliantly at her, pressing their foreheads together. “Finally,” she whispers.

[wandsandwheezes]

Till You Make It | F.W | CH10

Fake It | The Masterlist

Warnings // 3.4k // SMUT 18+, Hufflepuff!Reader, yelling, fighting, trauma, mentions of blood, mentions of blood purity, mentions of a shitty past relationship.

A/N // I can’t believe that this is the end of Fake It Till You Make It. I’d like to thank the angel that is @starlightweasley​ for being my co-writer and for coming along for the ride that is this series with me. I’d also like to thank every single person who has been reading along, I am so grateful for your support beyond belief.

Fred had done everything he could to make you comfortable. The second you had collapsed at the door, he was pulling you into his arms and laying you on the sofa, fetching a blanket and a drink for when you inevitably woke again, wanting to be there at your side the second your eyes opened. His hand was brushing over your hair as he felt your breathing pick up, realising that soon enough you would be awake again. You were lucky that the first thing you saw when you opened your eyes was Fred, smiling and sitting you up comfortably. “Here, it’s just some water but It’ll do you good.”

“Thank you, Freddie.” You half-cracked a smile at him as you took the glass from his hands, taking a sip, you didn't realise just how dry your throat was until the water had coated your throat and you were able to breathe without a feeling of hoarseness scratching at every word. 

"I'm scared Fred… Wh-What if he hurts you trying to get to me" You choke out, a tear rolling down your cheek as Fred takes the glass from your shaking hands again, placing it back on the coffee table before taking both of your hands in his. 

"Baby, you don't need to be scared of him, not now, not ever. You are so brave and so strong you don't even need me." He tilted your chin up to look into your eyes, his thumb wiping away the tears that spilled down your cheeks. You nodded, pushing away from the sofa to press your lips against his, happy that you had Fred here to console you and make you feel better. 

"Let's get you showered, patched up and into bed shall we?" He offered, standing up and offering out his hand for you to take at your own pace. This was what you loved about Fred, he made sure that you never felt pressured to make any decisions and treated you like your own person. You took his hand, letting him pull you up and towards your bathroom and on the way you saw Lady sound asleep in her bed, finally able to relax. He helped you shower, washing your hair and brushing it out gently for you before sitting you up on the counter to clean up your cuts and bleeding wounds. You watched as he went to put the clothing you had worn in the bin, but quickly and without thought you blurted out. "Burn them." 

He looked at you, seeing the panic in your eyes as he set the clothing in the bathtub, pulling out his wand and watching the clothes burn to a crisp with the simple incantation. You were at his side, finding a sense of relief at the way the material was reduced to dust before walking away to slip into one of Fred's t-shirts. It hurt your boyfriend to see the quick bruises that had formed on your skin in the shapes of fingerprints and ovals, vowing to never let it happen again, to never let anyone lay a hand on you so long as he lived. He helped you relax under the warmth of the duvet, pressing a kiss to your forehead as he brought the quilt down over your body. 

“Where are you going?” You whispered quietly, the fear of being alone hitting you suddenly and all at once. He stopped dead in his tracks, looking over his shoulder to see the tears that pooled in your eyes and he didn’t want to leave you, not ever if you felt safe with him there. He slipped off his shoes, knowing that he didn’t have to run the second someone knew where you were because you were home. Soon he was sliding in beside you and letting you curl into his side. You slept soundly in his arms, knowing that when Joe came, Fred was there to protect you. 

Fred couldn’t sleep a wink, he couldn’t even fathom the thought of the monster of your nightmares coming and taking you away in the night so he waited. He knew what you’d said and he wouldn’t leave you unprotected for even a second. That’s why he heard the locks being broken, the scuffling in the kitchen and the hushed breathing that echoed around the silent flat. Fred’s arms instinctively wrapped around your waist tighter, pulling you to his chest while pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

Fred gently slipped out from under the sheets, pushing his wand in his back pocket as he walked to the corner of the room, waiting for the inevitable, ready to confront the squib man for the first time. He held his breath as he watched the coward emerge from the doorway and Fred took note of the black eye he sported, his eyes fixated on you as he watched him take a deep breath. 

Joe’s gaze was transfixed upon your sleeping, vulnerable figure that he didn’t even notice the brown eyes gazing at him from across the room. You had left quite the mark on his face, not as many as he had littered on your own body but it was definitely something he hadn’t even anticipated from you. “My daisy…” He whispered, his voice filled with desperation and longing. 

“She’s not your daisy, you tosser.” Fred’s booming voice filled the silence, it was so loud that it made Joe jump, turning around only to be met with the shadow of darkness that filled the corners of each room. With each step forward, the dim light from the window unveiled every inch of his body as he emerged from the shadows, cracking his knuckles as he eyed up the shorter man like a predator watching its prey. “You have some nerve coming back to my home.”

“Think of yourself as a protector?” Joe sneers, rolling his eyes as he runs a hand through his hair, taking a step closer to Fred before looking over his shoulder to see you still sound asleep, curled up under the sheets.

“I damn well do a better job of protecting her than you ever could… The second you laid a hand on her you made it that way.” Fred returned, the anger that bubbled inside of him couldn’t be suppressed and he knew that it wouldn’t take much until he was pushed over the edge.

Joe scoffed, turning his head to the side ever so slightly and the moonlight that shone through the window illuminated his bruise and the bags under his eyes. Looking back towards the wizard, his eyes narrowed and a darkness swept across his features, “Obviously you’re not that good at protecting Y/N… slipped right into my hands she did, it was easy.” A grin spread itself across his features and a shiver ran down Fred’s spine making him swallow thickly. Part of your lover wondered if this is how you must have felt the first time Joe was this way with you. 

Cocking his head to the slight angle, he looked Fred up and down slowly before that grin turned into a menacing smirk and he continued: “Had to bribe the butler, of course. It’s amazing how someone can stay so silent when you hand them over a cheque, you see… I have everything sorted out for us both. I’ll take her now, we’ll go and you’ll never see any of us either again. It’s not that hard, mate. You’ll find another girl and you won’t be bothered ever again, I see what the papers wrote about you… ‘womanizer’, ‘bachelor’ it’s all quite interesting, really.” Joe clicked his tongue, the memory of seeing the paper in his parents’ living room had been a fateful day. Licking his lips, he glanced back towards the girl who was now stirring from the voices in the room, the bedsheets dragging along with her.

“Shut up.” Fred scowled as his face contorted with rage, getting increasingly more irritated as the bastard continued to speak and taunt him. 

“Fred, isn’t it?” Joe asked but he knew. “You don’t know how it felt when I got my hands on my daisy after so long… her supple skin, the rosiness in her cheeks and her soft hair.” Inhaling, he smiled genuinely to himself. “Of course… her unmarked body is a different matter, it was as if she had been waiting for me when I took off her–”

Fred had heard enough of Joe, unsure of how he managed to keep his cool long enough. He had his suspicions as to what had happened to you in his presence and the way Joe spoke so openly about how you felt to touch was enough to solidify the disgusting thoughts, the fact that he had the balls to touch you with any respect made all sane actions fly out the window. 

The ginger man didn’t even realise that his fists were raised until they were colliding over and over against Joe’s chiselled cheekbones. Whatever feeble punches made contact with Fred’s body seemed not to bother him, continuing his relentless assault on the man that quite simply had the nerve to hurt you and your boyfriend was ready to put him through every ounce of pain he had ever inflicted on you. The commotion in the room had caused your puppy to run into the room, the scent of the man who had left her petrified and stolen her mum caused her to bark angrily, growling as her teeth sunk into Joe’s shoulder. 

The echoes of grunts and yells that filled the room and the increasing barks from Lady roused you from your sleep, reaching out you realised that Fred was no longer in bed with you and that Lady was growling too which caused you to quickly pull out your wand and rub at your eyes. As they focused, you saw your boyfriend holding Joe down against the ground, blood flowing from his nose and mouth with every punch to his jaw. The scene in front of you caused you to swing your legs off the bed, running over to the two men, hands wrapping around Fred’s waist to try and pull him away, but his strength overpowered you, causing you to start yelling from the top of your lungs as you begged him to stop. “Freddie please,”

He eased at your pleading voice, pushing himself off the man whose face was covered in blood and as soon as he was standing you pushed the taller man behind you, pointing your wand at Joe for the second time, this time all the more determined in what you would do if it came to it. He was breathing heavily, wiping the blood from his mouth as he sat up, looking up at you through hooded eyes he laughed. “What a couple; Fred and Y/N… both too weak to stop the muggle man from his fury and anger.” 

“Tell me one reason I shouldn't kill you now.” You shouted, pushing away the fear that rose the second you remembered that Fred was there with you, swallowing thickly as you pondered it, the thought of killing him and being free from his never ending tirade.

“All I ever wanted to do was love you,” He whispered, his throat contracting due to the tears illuminating against his cheeks and his eyes that were once filled with life but also crashing waves now depicted the darkest seas, no hope beneath the void visible. “–and I wanted you to love me too.” 

You squeezed your eyes shut in response, head tilting to the left to look away from his direction as you pressed your lips together and tasted the saltiness from your own tears.

“My father would never associate with anything dirty, non-magical… or real.” He whispered, looking down at his lap where you laid your head, gazing up at him with widened eyes. “Imagine being a squib…– born into a pure-blood family,” He cocked his head slightly as he let out a small laugh and glanced out the window with tears in his eyes and sorrow lacing his voice, “I guess, yes, I’ve always had some envy towards those with magical abilities… not because I wanted it for myself but because I wanted to actually be liked by own father. I should stop talking, I’m prattling on about useless things–”

“No–” You quickly sat up, hair cascading down your back as you straightened and looked at him with slightly furrowed brows filled with sympathy and concern, your hand reaching to grasp his and the small act of kindness caused him to finally turn back to look at you. His gaze softened, taking your perplexed expression into consideration as he squeezed your hand delicately and nodded, listening to you intently: “Joe… your father, he wasn’t acting like a dad when he said those things.” 

“But why be with a squib–”

“Because I love you for who you are, not because of your blood or your abilities or your name… I love you for your kind and genuine and loving heart.” And with that, you placed your free hand on his heart, feeling it beat in rhythm with your own and you shared a kind smile with the man who you had grown to fall for throughout these months. 

It was then that you felt Fred’s comforting hand rest on your back and you knew you would be okay, you are brave. 

“I know you did.” You whispered, “But what we felt for each other, it wasn’t the right type of love, it was hurtful and perverse. I will never love you again, Joe, not when I know what real love feels like.” You realised that it was the first time that Fred was hearing those words, something you had never said to each other, but you knew he loved you in his caring actions and longing glances you felt love with Fred like it was the most natural feeling in the world. 

“I’m sorry, Joe.” You knew what you had to do, swallowing thickly you raised your wand, breathing out the incantation like it was part of your inhale and exhale. The spell altered his memory of you, knowing you as nothing more than a friend, erasing any and every memory of your relationship; every kiss, touch, date and lingering moment. You wondered why you hadn’t done it sooner and you felt a sigh of relief course through you as you felt a weight lift off of your shoulders. Part of you wished you could obliviate every mark and memory that was imprinted on your body and another part of you wished he could live with the knowledge that you had stood up to him. But when you glanced back at Fred, who was standing there with a bleeding lip and bruises yet to form, your mind went back to how carefree you felt back at Hogwarts watching him fly through the air and earn bruises that matched a winner’s smile and you felt comforted by the knowledge that you were going to be okay.

You watched as Joe’s face softened and his breathing regulated as blood dripped down his upper lip from his nose, falling against his shirt. You turned around to Fred wrapping your arms around him as you buried yourself into his chest and let out every tear inside of your body, listening to your faint sobs ricochet against his torso as his arms wrapped around you protectively, whispering softly for you to hear. “Let me call Lee, petal, we’ll get him taken to the ministry.” 

You nodded, letting him leave you to grab his phone and make the call he needed, leaving you alone with a man who was confused beyond belief and rubbing at his shoulder where Lady had bit him earlier. You knelt down beside him, fingertips brushing your hair out of your face as you sighed. “You’re going home now, Joe,” 

“Y/N, I– I don’t know what I’ve done, why am I here?” He looked up at you, seeing the tears in your eyes and recognising the fear that was packed into every look. He rested his hand on yours and for a moment you recognised the man that you had once loved, seeing past the monster that he had become and you sighed, placing your other hand over his to give it a gentle squeeze. 

“It was all a terrible accident, Joe… But Lee is coming, he’s going to take you home.” He nodded, taking a deep breath but wincing at the pain he felt in his ribs. You helped him up to his feet and out to the living area, where you were met with Lee and Fred. Lee’s eyes widened at the sight of Joe before looking back at Fred with a furrowed brow and a shake of his head, whisking away the bleeding man leaving you and Fred alone in the flat, the sounds of your breathing being the only thing between you. You reach out your hand to him, guiding him towards the bathroom, sitting him on the counter for you to clear up.

“You don’t have to do this, Y/N, we can just go to bed and–”  He spoke up through gravelly vocal chords, but you just shook your head, taking his hand to clear up the cuts with an alcohol-soaked cloth, using gentle movements to clear up the blood as he winced at the feeling. You cleaned his wounds in a comfortable silence, pulling off his bloodied shirt to see his torso littered with slowly forming bruises, your fingertips tracing over every single one as you looked into his eyes, your lip quivering at the thoughts that ran through your head. 

“I love you, Fred, I meant it when I said that being with you is what real love feels like. I’m not scared anymore, not afraid to admit that I love you and now that I’ve said it I never want to stop, Freddie, I love y–” 

“I love you.” He admitted, joining you in the last time you said the three words that he had been waiting to hear, his hand coming up to bring your foreheads together, smoothing your hair down as he gauged your reaction, a smile falling over his lips when he saw your soft smile. 

“Is now a good time to tell you I bought the cottage?” He laughed, pulling your waist gently so that you could be as close to him as possible, his heart skipping a beat when he watched your face light up for the first time in days.

“Fred Weasley, what did I do to deserve you?” You pulled him down to finally press your lips together, the flame of a thousand tiny fires building inside of you and you finally felt at peace. Fred gave you everything you could have ever needed to have a happy life and now you were free to take it with both hands, letting yourself finally fall in love with someone who deserved happiness just as much as you did.

After that night you and Fred were truly free to begin your life together, packing up the flat in less than a week, ready to move to a home that you had always dreamed of, away from the city and away from the madness that Joe had left you to suffer with. You were lucky you had an amazing group of friends ready to help in moving the countless boxes into the brand new home all ready for the two of you, who were yet to take your first steps inside. 

“I’m not sure I feel ready.” You admitted, staring at the doors to your new home, side by side with the man you loved as your hand held tightly onto his, fingers laced together as his thumb stroked the back of your hand. 

“I don’t think we ever will be, after all this is the home of our dreams.” 

“Not just that Freddie, I’m… free.” The last word you breathed out, turning to look at the man next to you, not expecting to meet his eyes so quickly but welcoming his gaze as you smiled up at him, but his hand was quickly on your cheek, pulling your lips to meet his in a soft and delicate kiss. 

“Let's do this properly then shall we?” he hummed, bending down to swoop you up bridal style before pushing open the door with his foot, carrying you across the threshold into your new home. The sounds of your laughs as they echoed through the hall made him truly realise how in love with you he was. Fred Weasley tried his best to show you how much he loved you every day he woke up and breathed for you, made you feel worthy and you slowly but surely grew to believe him. Together, you made it and that is the greatest feeling of all. 

taglist // @starlightweasley​​​ @theweasleysredhair​​ @pansydaisy​​ @vivianweasley​​ @feetoffthetablee​​ @darthwheezely​​ @thisismynerdyself​​ @witch-and-a-half​​ @loony-loopy-lupinn​​ @rip-us​​ @hopemalfoyweasley​​ @softlyqoos​​ @colorfulprofessornickelangel​​​ @fandomscombine​​ @satellitespidey​​ @rip-us​​ @starkidpotty​​​ @mollydarling-hphm​​ @amwithers2001​​ @asthmax​​ @just-here-to-escape-from-reality​​ @whizboingies​​ @rosietoesy​

[elizabeethan]

Spaces Between Us Chapter 10: Over Again

The hardships of real life separated them six years ago, and Emma has been struggling to put that fact behind her ever since. But then, only after she’s convinced herself that she’s moved on and that her new life is enough, Killian Jones comes back.

A Captain Swan Modern AU

A/N: Not much to say here. Mentions of what Emma went through in the previous chapter, as well as some minor medical stuff. Message me if you need more info!

Thank you, as usual, to my beta and friend @the-darkdragonfly, and to @donteattheappleshook and @xhookswenchx for listening to my ramblings and helping me figure out the plot to this <3

Read the Rest

Read on Ao3

Read my Other Stuff

~~~~

Emma is stuck. She knows what will make her happy, what will make things right for her, and she can’t get there. Any move she makes, someone suffers, and she can hardly stand it any longer. While she originally thought that a separation would lead to her potentially losing her son, she fears now that doing anything to inconvenience her husband could mean real, immediate threats to their physical safety, and she has no idea what to do. She’s feeling so hopeless that she can hardly get herself out of bed on time to walk Henry to school the next morning. 

 Walsh isn’t home when she wakes, although she isn’t sure when he left because she spent another night in the guest room. While she would normally text Killian minimally, she found that she felt so despondent last night that she couldn’t pick up her phone. While he normally makes her feel a sense of calm safety, her argument with her husband and the imminent threat of danger against her and Henry erased any feelings of positivity that she had. 

 Of course, it was foolish of her to use Killian as a means to feel good about her life when she knows how bad it is. Having him has been great, but it doesn’t address the root of her problems, and she’s starting to see that with more and more clarity. She can see now that, despite how soothing his presence has been over the last few months, things are as bad as ever-- worse-- and last night served as a wake up call to that fact. The depression that has plagued her for six years, the blackened shadow that she thought Killian had shown a light upon, has settled itself over her heart once again. 

 Henry’s quiet on their short walk to school, as if he can read her demeanor, and it makes the tears continue to flow from her eyes until they feel frozen on her cheeks. She can’t believe that she’s let this affect him so much that he can tell that she’s feeling this way. It only serves as another reminder of her shortcomings as a mother. 

 He hugs her so tight when they get to school that she dreads letting go, wishing she could steal him away and run as fast and as far as they can, but she knows that could never happen. Whatever she does, Walsh and his cohorts will find them, of that she’s certain. 

She’s on her way back to the house, unsure of how to spend her Friday and desiring not to see anyone who can tell her something she already knows. She doesn’t need to hear from her sister about how horrible her life has become. She doesn’t need to hear from Killian about how desperately he wants to get her away from her husband. 

 Of course, what she needs doesn’t seem to be on the universe’s radar, because before she can make it halfway home, the squad car is pulling up behind her and parking, the driver’s door swinging open violently. 

 “Emma!” he calls, jogging towards her and stopping short just in front of her. “Emma, what’s… I didn’t hear from you last night.”

 There’s nothing she can say or do, because his tone suggests that he’s upset with her, and she can’t handle that now. So she cries. 

 “Killian,” she sobs, flinching away from him when he reaches his arms out towards her. 

 “Love, talk to me. Come on, we can go somewhere safe.”

 “I’m not safe,” she shakes her head. “We aren’t--” 

 “Emma,” he says, trying hard to calm her panicked breathing by lightly holding the tops of her arms. “You’re safe right now. Henry’s at school and he’s safe too. Let’s go to the station and I can jump your car, aye? Or, my mate, Will, works at a garage. He can sort it out. Let’s just… let’s get off the street, alright?”

 She looks around, worried that someone may see her mid-breakdown, but there’s no one around so she follows him and gets into the car. 

 It takes longer than it should for her to realize that they aren’t going to the station. Instead, he parks in his usual spot in front of his apartment, turning towards her after he surveys the area and determines there to be no one around. With urgency, he gets out of the car and rounds to her door before she can even undo her seatbelt, opening the door and holding his hand out for her. 

 She squeezes his hand harder than she needs to, her knuckles going white as they walk up the stairs and inside the door. He says something when they get inside but she doesn’t hear him, the whole world sounding like she’s under water as she continues to realize just how bad things have gone for her. He says her name again and again, running his thumbs along her cheeks to wipe away her tears until she can finally meet his eyes with hers. It’s only once she recognizes the pure fear in his eyes that she’s able to snap herself out of it and focus on the sound of his voice. 

 “Killian,” she croaks, and he breathes a sigh of relief. 

 “Emma, please talk to me,” he practically begs her, his voice soft and gentle but filled with terror as he kisses her eyelids and her cheeks and the tip of her nose. “What’s going on? What did he do?”

 “He didn’t hurt me,” she promises. She finally allows herself to take in a deep breath and falls against his chest, practically collapsing against him and letting him support the full brunt of her weight. Before she can say anything else, she lets out a loud, painful sob. 

 He scoops her up easily, cradling her against his chest as he carries her to the couch and holding her in his lap, grabbing for a throw blanket and wrapping her up tightly and holding her together both literally and metaphorically. He whispers in her ear about how he’s here, she’s safe, he won’t let anything happen to her, but she knows he has little control over that. 

 “I’m so scared,” she cries against his neck, squeezing her thighs over his hips to try and get closer to him. 

 “Would you tell me what happened, my love?” he asks gently, and though she can tell that he’s still a ball of nerves, he tries to hide it in order to soothe her. “Why don’t we get in the bath, aye? A nice warm tub always makes you feel better.” 

 “Stay with me?” she asks, almost begging, and he nods. 

 “I’ll always, always be by your side, love.” 

 She nods, letting him help her off the couch, though she’s starting to think more clearly. He guides her into the bathroom, and although the tub isn’t too big, he always holds her close enough to keep her warm despite her shoulders and knees sticking out of the hot water. 

 He starts the tub, filling it with the soap he knows she likes the best and sitting her on the toilet gently and running his fingers through her hair. He takes the elastic from her wrist and starts delicately pulling it around her golden strands, lifting them into a high bun so that they can escape the water. Once her hair is taken care of, he starts at the zipper of her sweatshirt, trailing his fingers slowly as he opens it and pulls it off of her shoulders. He folds the garment carefully and places it on the counter before returning his hands to her back, unhooking her bra and placing it atop her shirt before he drops a tender, loving kiss to her forehead that silently tells her everything she needs to hear. 

 The act of him undressing her seems so simple, but it’s so incredibly personal and intimate. She’s finally able to breathe, to let her mind rest, to close her eyes and not see burning anger staring back at her. She knows she can’t rely on him to make everything better for her, but she can certainly appreciate how much he helps her. 

 He takes off her leggings too, pulling her underwear down with them, and folds each piece of clothing to add to the small pile. Once she’s undressed, he places her towel around her shoulders and begins to remove his own clothes, placing them next to hers, and she can’t help but long sadly over how good the two outfits look together on his bathroom counter. He plants another soft kiss to her forehead, then her eyelids, then her lips, before he turns and determines that the tub is full enough. 

 He instructs her to stand with a gentle, “come, love,” placing his hand on the small of her back and carefully guiding her to the tub. He holds her hand as she lets herself sink, feelings of panic and hopelessness melting into the hot water and dispersing further when he climbs in and settles against her back. She lets her head drop backwards against his shoulder and holds his forearms as they wrap tightly around her middle. 

 In the gentle silence of the tub, the only sounds filling the room their breathing and the steady drip from the faucet, she finally feels somewhat glued together. She can stop thinking about how her life is crumbling around her and allow herself to feel whole in his arms. It’s a reminder of how easy the last few months have been. How easy it’s been to ignore the weight of her situation and of her desperate depression in favor of focusing on the light and warmth he’s brought into her life. 

 She gives herself a few moments to feel at peace, safe and comforted in his arms, before she moves to turn around. It proves difficult in the small tub, his legs getting tangled in hers, but she’s eventually able to settle herself on his lap and face him, her fingers sliding into his hair and dampening it slightly. He rests his own on her waist, soothingly scratching her skin with his soft fingertips. “Love,” he murmurs in the quiet, and the soft word is enough to break her just enough. 

 Falling forward, she lets her lips envelop his and holds him to her as closely as she can possibly manage. He kisses her back easily, letting his tongue smooth over her bottom lip as she sighs into his mouth. She feels a sense of desperation to be as near to him as possible; to allow him to care for her and love her in the way that her husband would rather die than do. 

 “Emma,” he breathes against her mouth, and she whimpers at the loss of him as he pulls away to look at her. 

 “I need you,” she pleads in a whisper. “Please, I just… I need you to love me.” 

 “I do love you,” he promises, matching her tone. “More than anything. Nothing will ever change that.” 

 He can read her, of course. She knows because he takes her face in his hands and kisses her with hot ferocity that gives her exactly what she needs. He tells her again and again that he loves her as she desperately lifts her hips over his and slides him into her. She’s hot and tense and needy, and the feeling of him gliding into her brings her home. 

 She’s never cried during sex before. But the way he kisses her and cradles her in his arms and bends his knees to support her backside against his thighs makes her feel so solid. She feels the opposite of how she felt last night and the opposite of how she feels each time she’s with Walsh. She loves Killian so much, and it’s killing her to be so trapped in her marriage to another man. 

 Emma cries out her love for him while she comes hard around his cock, and he kisses away her tears and holds her as close to him as he can while he comes too. “Baby,” he chokes out as he bites her shoulder, the way he only does when he’s so emotional and he’s come so hard that he doesn’t have a filter. 

 Finally, when their breathing has quieted and they’ve loosened their grips on each other just slightly, he mumbles into her neck, “I just want what’s best for you and your boy, Emma.” 

 “It’s you,” she says without hesitation. “It is. But he--” she chokes on her words and lets her head fall against the warm firmness of his chest. 

 “Emma, please,” he begs. “Please talk to me. Let’s get you dried off and I’ll make you something to eat.”

 “I can’t eat,” she whispers. 

 “Please,” he says again, kissing her temple. “Just try for me, alright? I’m sure you’ve barely eaten since yesterday.”

 She nods, and when they finally make their way out of the water, he dries her tenderly with the towel he keeps for her and gives her the privacy she needs to get dressed. Being alone in his bathroom isn’t as bad as she was expecting, her feelings of anxiety and terror creeping back but not debilitatingly so. Just being in his home where she knows no one will find her is enough to soothe her aching heart. When she’s finally dressed, she creeps into the kitchen slowly, hugging her arms around her waist before he hoists her up onto the counter beside the stove and kisses her nose softly. 

 He cracks a second egg into a bowl and starts beating them quickly, reminding her where she got the recipe for Henry’s favorite scambied eggies in the first place as he splashes in some cream and dusts in some seasonings. He holds his hand over the pan to test the temperature and then pours the eggs in slowly, the mixture looking more perfect than anything she’s ever been able to duplicate. 

 “There we are,” he says as he plates them and places them on the small table, the very one they sat at months ago when they decided that they could never be apart from one another. She hops down from the counter and follows his lead, sitting at her usual seat and poking her fork into the perfect, fluffy eggs he’s prepared for her.  

 He jokes with her lightheartedly as she eats, and she feels herself smiling at him although her sordid mind tries to stop her. He tells her about the shenanigans his friend Will has gotten into while he’s been sheriff, and about his worries that he’s bending the rules by letting certain things slide. He tells her how much he enjoyed spending time with her son yesterday, and she’s reminded of how much his own father resents him. 

 “Okay,” she finally mumbles, fueled by how horribly her husband has wronged her son. She stands up, places the empty plate in his sink, and moves to sit on his lap.

 She recounts the evening as best she can, telling him about how Walsh had kissed her and taken it farther than she was comfortable the moment he touched her, although he didn’t stop right away. He tightens his grip on her, holding her close against his chest as she goes on about his fist colliding with the wall just beside her head. He runs his hand up and down her spine and kisses her temple as she tells him what her husband said about being a father. She tells him what Walsh said about her ruining his life and his desire to punish her, and she feels his breathing quicken. He listens to every word and stays silent long after she finishes her story. 

 “Emma,” he finally chokes, “I need to get you out of there.” She shakes her head forcefully against his chest. 

 “He said--”

 “Fuck what he said,” he says, cutting her off more forcefully than she thinks he meant to. “I’m the sheriff. What you’ve described is abuse. Physical threats. Unwanted sexual advances. Even punching the wall qualifies as interpersonal violence. All you have to do is make a report and--”

 “No, Killian, I can’t. He’ll know…”

 “Darling,” he insists, cupping her cheek and massaging his fingers against her scalp, “the law can keep you safe. I can keep you safe. I know I’m biased, but I have dealt with things like this in the past. I have experience supporting battered women.” 

 She gulps and takes a heavy breath, her lungs burning as she does so at the mention of her being battered. The title makes her cringe. She feels weak. “He has his… bodyguards. I’ve never seen them do anything, but I know they have a reputation. They’ll find me and Henry and they’ll… they'll make me pay.” 

 “So we leave, get you the protection you need. We can get you a safehouse, I have pull here, love.” she sighs. “I know it’s difficult to think of yourself as having fallen into this situation. A lot of women struggle to see themselves as a victim. But you are, my love, and the department can help you.”

 She sighs again and rests against his chest. Just as she’s about to formulate her thoughts, to try and put into words just how terrified she is of how wrong things can go, how scared she is to make any more waves, but how badly she wants to escape-- just as she’s about to agree with him and make a plan to get away-- her phone starts ringing and she jumps. Killian reaches for it and shows her the screen. 

 Storybrooke Elementary flashes across the screen, and her heart drops into her stomach as she slides her finger across to answer the phone. 

 It’s Henry, of course. They've called an ambulance; it’s five minutes away. His rescue inhaler isn’t working. 

 Killian has his coat on before she even finishes the call, ushering her towards the door and slamming the car into reverse before he throws the sirens on. 

 ~~~~

 The world is a blur, and he’s never seen his Emma in such distress before. He thought he’d seen the worst of it earlier while she was recounting the way her husband had attacked her the night before, but when she watches helplessly as her son struggles for breath, clinging his hands to hers in fear, he goes white and feels nauseous. He’s never met someone stronger than Emma Swan, and right now, she’s breaking. 

 She cries into his chest while the doctors wheel him through the double doors through which she isn’t allowed to follow. The boy has lost consciousness, and they must act quickly. Her fingers dig into his neck and shoulders as she clings to him as if it’s the only thing keeping her from drowning in her sea of terror. If she loses her son, she loses everything. 

 Eventually, blessedly, after she’s caught her breath and exhausted herself to the point where she can no longer shed any tears, a doctor comes out to meet them and informs her that her son is alright. His asthma has gotten worse and they will need to begin more extensive treatments, but he’s sleeping soundly in bed and she can go and see him in a moment. But first, he asks to speak with her alone, and Killian steps away out of ear shot, only able to watch as her face falls and her shoulders sag. 

 ~~~~

 “Henry’s asthma is very severe, and it seems to be getting worse,” the on-call pulmonologist, Dr. Whale, says. “Is that from your’s or dad’s side of the family?” 

 Emma shrugs anxiously. “Neither of us have it in our family. He was premature.” 

 He raises a brow doubtfully and gives her a look that makes her feel small and incorrect. “Are you sure? What was his birth weight? Perhaps you got the date of conception wrong?” 

 “I didn’t,” she snaps sensitively. The judgement she’s receiving from him is setting her on edge, even more so than she has been all day. “I knew the exact date of conception, and he was a month early.” 

 He sighs, rubbing his hand over his face, and says, “Mrs. Oswald--” 

 “Emma.” 

 “Emma… Henry’s asthma is severe. It’s indicative of being genetically inherited. While four weeks is certainly early, being premature would not have led to this level of symptomatology.” 

 She screws her brows together and glares at him, her heart beating forcefully against her chest as she asks, “what are you implying?” 

 “What I’m implying, ma’am, is that your son’s condition is more than likely a genetic one. Meaning it was inherited from either yourself, or his father. If you don’t have asthma in your family, perhaps you missed something. Or your husband did. Or… I might suggest that Henry’s--”

 “That’s enough,” she demands, holding up her hand to silence him. Through her denial and her refusal to consider something that seems more and more possible, she lets her shoulders drop in defeat. 

 When Killian came to her months ago, she refused to hear his suggestion that he was actually Henry's father. It wasn’t because she didn’t want him to be, or because she was desperate for Walsh to be. It was because, if Killian truly is Henry’s father, that means she spent six years of her life with a man who hates her and her son. She put her child through emotional neglect for his entire life without meaning to at all. The last night they spent together, with the breakup sex and the crying, Emma was on the pill, but looking back, she hadn’t been taking it regularly enough in her stress as they considered ending their relationship. 

 When she found out she was pregnant, she couldn’t stand the idea of it being Killian’s because it would mean she made the wrong decision. She shouldn’t have given him that ultimatum and she should’ve swallowed her pride and gone with him to London because that’s what you do when you become a parent. You make sacrifices. And she didn’t do that. 

 So she unwittingly convinced herself for over half a decade that the man she spent one night with had impregnated her and went along with his charade of a happy, well adjusted family. It isn’t as if she ever truly knew that the baby was Killian’s, not really. She hardly noticed any pregnancy symptoms until a few weeks after she was with Walsh, and unknowingly allowed that to trick her mind into thinking it was his. Her denial was so strong, her heartbreak so painful, that she didn’t even allow herself the chance to consider another possibility. When she realized her terrible mistake soon after they were married, she realized she couldn’t undo what she’d done, so she let herself fall deeper into her denial and held her head up as she grinned and beared the treatment she now realizes she never deserved. The treatment she now realizes she never had to endure in the first place. 

 “What, um,” she starts nervously, gnawing at her bottom lip as she turns quickly towards Killian and then back at the judgemental face of Dr. Whale. “What sort of information would you need to determine whether… whether Henry is…” 

 “Do you have any inclination on who the father could be?” He asks, seemingly able to read her mind. Neither of them proposed the possibility of Henry not being Walsh’s son, but it seems as though this doctor senses the source of her internal struggle. “If we had information on the genetic factors of his condition, it could help us determine the best course of treatment.” 

 She nods immediately. “Yes, I do.”

~~~~

~~~~

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[princesspiratecat]

The Rise and Fall of the Shepard Family Part 28: Summer, 1084

(Only two more parts left!) 

Part 1& Part 2

Part 3 & Part 4

Part 5 & Part 6 & Part 7

Part 8 & Part 9 & Part 10

Part 11 & Part 12 & Part 13

Part 14 & Part 15 & Part 16

Part 17 & Part 18 & Part 19

Part 20 & Part 21 & Part 22

Part 23 & Part 24 & Part 25

Part 26 & Part 27

Since they had arrived at the Inn a week ago, Frances made a point of venturing to Grimsby whenever he wished. He knew his father’s pride prohibited him from confronting his son, or making any kind of scene if the two of them should meet. Thus, he took full advantage of it and did as he pleased. He met friends and family members, he went riding with his new Brother-in-law, and he even delivered a letter to Gwyn from Gwendolyn directly.

When he realized there would be no repercussions, he relocated the wedding back to the Grimsby church, despite that it would likely infuriate his father. He couldn’t find a single reason why they should marry elsewhere just to please him, and it was what Gwendolyn had really wanted. He felt a small triumph in knowing that it would be done properly at the church, in front of everyone, in pomp and style.

Besides, he won’t be pleased anyway, no matter where we wed.

Gwendolyn on the other hand, had been far more cautious, as she had much more to lose. Her sisters were still at the orphanage under the care of Marcelle, and she did not wish to cause tongues to wag more than they ought. She had mostly remained at the Inn during the day, corresponding with her family and friends from the comfort of their spacious rooms. But he still made every effort to get her out and about even if it was just for a short period of time. He knew she needed other people to re-enter her world after such a long period of isolation. 

Yet tongues would wag anyway, especially in a village as small as Grimsby. 

Most people were in support of the match between Gwendolyn and Frances. Since the betrothal had been announced over a year ago, it was in fact, common knowledge. Some had thought they were already married (an idea they did not correct). And the common people loved the idea that their Anglo-Norman heir apparent was taking a commoner bride. However, since Frédérique’s wedding, the village had taken notice of the couple’s absence, and now the story of all that had happened was beginning to leak out slowly. 

Frances had his suspicions that Oswald of Whitestone was behind it, but he never had any absolute proof. Indeed, it would be a good way to slander both the house of Allard and his engagement to Gwendolyn. Then again, it could have been any number of the servants at any number of houses that were connected to the Allards. He had no way of knowing for certain, their connections were just too extensive.

He knew there were rumors. He knew there were stories. Some of them had been absurd and far fetched, others were more plausible. His jaw tightened as he thought of their gossip. He hated being the subject of it, even though it happened more often then he cared to admit. It came along with being an Allard, and being an heir.

In practice, the couple tried as best as they could to ignore comments or questions from anyone, especially people they didn’t know. He took a bit of comfort in easily quashing the pregnancy stories just by encouraging her to come out. But it had the affect of making them unable to think of much else whenever they did go into public. His father’s presence seemed to be everywhere. Frances steeled himself for their stares and whispers, and wanted to shield Gwendolyn from them as much as he could.

One day, just three days before the wedding and festivities, he received a letter from Francine telling him that his father was ill and had been so for some time. The subject had been on his mind all morning, and all evening. He ruminated quite a bit before he brought it up to Gwendolyn. 

The next day as they were walking to the marketplace Frances confided to her what Francine had written. They had decided to go through the woods to visit an old spot where they had often foraged for herbs. Then they walked to the old log where they used to sit together. It seemed like so long ago.

"If my father dies, I will not be able to live with myself, considering the way things stand now. I’d rather go to him and attempt to make peace with him, even if he cuts me off without a farthing. I expect that he already has.”

“And what if he refuses to speak to you? Are you prepared for the hurt that will follow?”

“As much as any person can be in such a situation, yes. After all is said and done, I will still be at ease knowing that I have done all that I can to heal the breech between us. Nobody will ever be able to say that I have not.” His face was determined, but his tone was casual. 

“Are you mainly considering the feelings of others on this subject? Or do you consult your own?”

“No.... I do care what some of my family thinks. But I know how I would feel if he died. I regretted not saying enough to my mother before she passed, and I will not repeat that mistake again. I know you must know what I speak of.”  

“Yes, of course. We all have our regrets, they come with the finality of death.” She sighed just then, and he knew she was thinking of loved ones that were now dead and buried. A few moments passed before she continued. “I will honor whatever decision you make. You must do as you think is right. Only let us go to him officially as husband and wife, so that he cannot attempt to separate us again. Let me come with you, and I will brave his wrath by your side.”

He had not considered that she would want to go to his father after all he had put her through. He knew her pain far too well. But then he remembered how strong she was, and he couldn’t help but marvel at her strength and courage. He pulled her close to him and kissed her cheek. Suddenly a kind of relief blew over him like a calming breeze on a dry day. She often had that affect on him.

“A united front then? Let him see us together.” 

He would be lost again without Gwendolyn, if the year prior had been any indication. She was like an anchor for him, guiding him in the right direction and helping him to make sense of the world when it just didn’t make sense. She always persuaded him to follow his heart, and to trust his own judgement. She allowed him the freedom to be exactly who he was, without trying to mold him into what she thought he should be, like his father had. 

Was he the same anchor for her? One day he would ask her, when he was ready to hear exactly what she had to say on the subject. But for now, he mainly just wanted to enjoy the fact that she still loved him, something he had not expected when he had ridden to see her. She loved him whether he was Prince or Pauper, and to him that was one of the hallmarks of real love. 

And it was love that brought them to the alter in two days time. Saying his vows was easy enough, until he stopped to think about what they really meant, and his eyes filled up with tears momentarily. There were no doubts or reservations left, just the purity of his deepest feelings for her, and hers for him. 

The wedding had garnered so much attention, that almost the entire village had been there, including all of the servants, his new In-laws, and every single orphan in Grimsby! Only his father had been missing, but Frances had been too engrossed in his own joy to give it much thought. 

When the church began to clear out and everyone made their way to the wedding feast, he watched as both of their families shed tears of happiness. There were many kisses and embraces, and much rejoicing. It had been a long road to get to this point, and he was grateful to them all for the hand they had in bringing he and his wife together.

This is just the beginning. This is just the beginning.

[randomfandomimagine]

Heal My Heart (Cloud Strife x Reader)

Characters: Cloud Strife

Fandom: Final Fantasy VII

Tags: Reader Insert, Gender Neutral Reader, Hurt/Comfort

Warnings: Injury, mentions of blood, sexual/romantic tension

Word Count: 2,2k words

Requested by anon: Hi :) may I request a Cloud Strife ficlet in which Cloud gets hurt in a battle and the reader patches him up and it's all very charged and filled with tension (since Cloud has to be shirtless and all)? Or it can be the other way around and the reader gets hurt and Cloud awkwardly but tenderly tries patching her up and is very conscious of being close/having to touch her body?

A/N: I was really excited about this one, and although I struggled a bit until I fixed some things I wasn’t happy with (big shoutout to the lovely @xionroxas​ for helping me with it!) I now love the result and I hope you do too! 

Your first battle together had been very different from what you imagined. It was a strange point in your relationship with Cloud, past the friendship that used to bind you yet not quite reached the romantic part that you both seemed interested in. Hence, all your encounters were slightly awkward with the romantic tension repressed between you. 

After lots of insisting on your part, Cloud had finally budged and accepted to let you come with him on this encounter. Your arguments, he had to admit, were strong and valid. No matter how capable he was, Cloud wasn’t invincible and as you predicted, he was outnumbered. Luckily, you were there to have his back. Even if he was worried that you would get hurt, which you did.

“Don’t give me the silent treatment now” You scoffed, noticing the tight wrinkle on his brow. “You got hurt too, didn’t you?” 

“I told you it would be dangerous”

“Yeah, and I knew that already”

He still didn’t say a word as you both made your way back. Just the thought of putting up with a silent seething Cloud made you exhausted. Or maybe it was the injury that you were hiding from him even as your ankle and knee throbbed under the fabric of your clothes. 

Comitting to his brooding demeanor, he silently opened the door to his room. You sneaked in before he could close it in your face and leave you to the loneliness of your own room. 

“What are you doing?” He scowled at you as you followed him inside.

“Someone has to patch you up, right?” You tiredly pointed to the tear in his tank top, there where a small amount of blood still seeped through his stomach.

“You’re so stubborn” Cloud only replied, resigning himself. His eyes watched you as you closed the door behind you and went to get the first aid kit.

“Yeah, yeah, like you’re any better” As you faced your back to him, you paused for a moment. A sudden lump formed in your throat and tears stung in your eyes. In all honestly, you hated to feel this harshness between you.

Hanging your head low, you told yourself that he wasn’t the warmest person. Even on your best moments, he had never been openly affectionate... but he could be very sweet and tender when he wanted to. 

When you heard the sound of his sword being leaned against the wall and the springs of the bed complain as he sat on it, you forced yourself back to reality. Clutching the first aid kit in your hands, you turned to him.

It was then when you realized where his wound was. And that you needed better access to it in order to properly treat it. Cloud frowned, staring at you, and you just hoped you weren’t blushing at the words you were about to say.

“Take your shirt off, Soldier” You dryly said, even if your voice shook a bit.

“Ex-Soldier” He corrected as usual, but didn’t move at first. 

Exasperated, you rolled your eyes at him and tilted your head. Cloud sighed and obliged, removing his tank top over his head and carelessly throwing it on top of the bed.

Your breath hitched at the sight of his bare torso and you couldn’t help but to stare. There was a scar on his chest, right above his fresh wound. Despite his pale skin tone, he was slim and his muscles were defined. You gulped, having to remind yourself what you were doing. 

“Any problem?” He asked, noticing your hesitance.

“N-No” You hurried to kneel down in front of him to hide yourself, being careful with your injured leg. “It’s just worse than I thought”

Your hands worked fast as they drenched a piece of gauze in alcohol and quickly applied it to his wound. Cloud groaned in pain at the sudden movement, and his hand flew to yours. He had taken his gloves off at some point, so it made direct contact with your skin. His palm lingered over your hand even as you looked up at him and locked eyes.

“Sorry” You could barely hear your low voice over the drumming of your heart. “I’ll be more careful”

He gravely nodded, slowly letting go of your hand. Immediately you missed his touch, his warmth, the rough texture of his calloused hands. You parted your lips, ready to tell him to do it again, to touch you, to forget the coldness that hung in the air and hold you. Until you remembered that you needed to treat his wound.

Resigned to your metaphorical distance despite your physical closeness, you sighed and carried on with your task. You gingerly pressed the gauze against his stomach. This time he didn’t flinch.

“What is it?” Cloud’s voice broke the heavy silence that had established.

He had noticed your inner turmoil. After all, he knew you as well as you knew him. You took a moment to reply, refusing to voice your genuine thoughts. Instead, you asked something that was starting to weigh down on you.

“Are you still mad at me?” You piped up after several more seconds.

Cloud sighed himself, averting his gaze when you glanced up at him again.

“I was never mad at you” Was his reply, still refusing to look at you.

You knew him far too well to realize what this meant. Angrily picking up a bandage to cover his wound, you shook your head at him.

“Don’t you dare blame yourself for this, it was my decision” Even if your tone held anger, your fingers continued to be gentle. “And I’m fine, just a few scratches here and there”

“Right” As soon as you were done patching him up, Cloud tugged at your arm.

Surprised that he was pulling you up, you gasped. He was strong and determined, and effortlessly pulled you to your feet as he stood himself. Mustering all self-control you could, you repressed the grimace that wanted to occupy your expression as you were forced to stand on your injured ankle. Despite your efforts, however, you stumbled forwards a little with a yelp. 

Cloud was quick to hold you by the hips, keeping you in place. You stared at him, surprised that he seemed so ready to catch you. Almost like he knew you would stumble.

“Head rush” You lied, and Cloud frowned in response. Your gazes locked for several seconds.

Feeling closer to him in every way, you opened your mouth to say something. He broke the instantaneous connection. Not saying a word, he moved you so you swapped places with him and carefully shoved you down onto the bed, taking the spot he was sitting in just a moment ago.

“Cloud?” You asked in confusion, watching as he carefully picked up your foot. His grip around your ankle was loose and yet it brought a pang of pain. “Ow!”

“Hurts?” He solely asked, and heat immediately flushed to your face.

“You’re really strong and...” Watching how he delicately propped your leg up on his knee, you interrupted your poor excuse. “What are you doing?”

“You were limping” Going along with his raspy voice, his eyes were severe as he peered at you. It was now your turn to avoid his eyes.

Cloud didn’t say anything else, shielding in the silence as he gently rolled your pants up to reveal your ankle. When his bare fingers delicately traced up your skin, you couldn’t help but shiver. He carefully put pressure in different spots, and although most of them hurt, you never wanted him to stop. The invisible barrier that was always between you had finally broken and his touch was tender and more wonderful than you could ever imagine.

“It’s nothing” He muttered, forcing you to look into his eyes as he stared into yours. “You’ll be fine if you don’t strain it” 

“Thanks, doctor” You joked, standing to your feet once more.

Again, Cloud reached out and held you by the hips when you inevitably stumbled. Your faces were suddenly extremely close, and you could see a faint blush appearing in his cheeks. The heat on yours betrayed the same flush.

When Cloud rearranged his hold on you, however, you yelped out in pain. He gasped before he could ask anything when your hands met again with his. 

“Oh” You breathed in relief, remembering about the mild wound you had nearly forgotten about. “Just a scratch, a bullet grazed me” 

Cloud’s brow furrowed as he frantically moved, carefully sitting you down again and going to take a look at it. His fingers, however, stopped at the hem of your shirt.

“Uh...” He gulped, shyly taking ahold of it. “Can I...?” 

Wrapping your fingers around his hand, you pulled at it and lifted your shirt just enough to reveal your wound. Cloud focused his gaze on it, relaxing his shoulders at the realization that it was nothing grave even if his eyebrows lingered on their frown.

His touch was still gentle as he prepared the gauze and pressed it, drenched in alcohol, against your wound. It smarted, but you refused to complain. Instead, as Cloud treated the superficial injury, you observed him. It was hard to miss how he was careful not to let his fingers touch your skin if he could help it. Nonetheless, his cares were tender as he covered the wound for you. 

You smiled to yourself at his face of concentration, and especially at the reddish tone his face had acquired. It made you remember all the reasons why you had feelings for him, even if you had unknowingly pushed them away after your argument.

“Did I miss something?” Cloud asked, putting everything back on the first aid kit.

“Yes, heal my heart” You replied without thinking, your gaze following him as he stood to his feet. You did the same, holding on to his shoulders to support yourself.

“Y/N...” When you regained that closeness, Cloud moved his head to the side.

“Just play along...” You begged, hoping that he would for once. It was exhausting that every time you tried to make a step forward, he took two steps backwards.

The brief silence that followed made the tension in the air all the more evident. It was not an angry one like before, yet one filled with unspoken words, sweet nothings that were never pronounced. 

“How?” He said after heaving a resigned sigh.

“Give me hope” You wrinkled your forehead, feeling frustrated tears arriving to your eyes. “Say something, anything...”

He didn’t. Cloud stayed quiet as usual. Tense and uncomfortable.

Letting go of him, you dropped your head in defeat. You gave up. Tears started rolling down your eyes. You had been convinced that you were in the same page, that you had feelings for each other despite the walls you both built around them. Maybe you were wrong, maybe you say something where there was nothing. You thought Cloud cared about you, but maybe he was just resigned to your attempts. It was so tiring, and so painful...

“It��s useless...” You whispered to yourself, feeling your shoulders convulsing with sobs. Trying not to let him know, you tried to repress any sounds, although some small strangled noises left your throat as more tears blurred your vision.

Ttwo arms suddenly envelopped you, urgently shoving you against his bare chest so tightly that it made sense that you couldn’t breathe. Utterly shocked, you just stood there, arms by your side, without even realizing you could return the hug. The tears froze in your eyes and the tightness that had arrived to your chest lessened.

“When you screamed and I saw you fall, I was terrified” Cloud whispered, nuzzling your neck. “That what you wanna hear?” 

A nervous yet genuine bout of laughter escaped you. Just then, your arms finally moved and wrapped around him in return. His skin was soft and warm.

“I’ll take it” You replied, relieved that he tore down his walls. At least, some of them.

Cloud chuckled against your ear, and you heart skipped a beat at the wonderful but unexpected sound. Pulling away, you looked up at him.

“Is that a laugh I hear?” 

“No”

His arms left you, but you weren’t going to let him win this time. You smiled, and to your surprise you saw a glimpse of his smile before you put your arms around his waist and hugged him again. 

“We should rest” All the accumulated tension left you as you pressed yourself against his chest. “I think the worry got to your head”

He scoffed, even if his arms returned around your frame.

“The pain got to your head” Was his response, which made you smile. That was the Cloud you knew and loved.

Despite your words, however, none of you moved to get some rest. Instead you stayed there, holding on to each other. You stood there, with your hands leaning over his bare built chest, with his hands resting over your hips in the small bit of skin exposed under the rolled up shirt. You both stood there, claiming something you craved and that you hadn’t allowed yourselves to have. Until now.

-

Tag list: @call-me-harley-quinn​ / @anxiouslyreckless​ / @xionroxas​ / @dancewaterdance02​ / @little-faerie-artist​ / @x-joie-x​ / @honeybunhanbin​ / @legallyblindgamer727​ / @goodmorningawfulbye​ / @trunks-kiwi​ / @ron-sparky-speirs​  // If you want to be added or taken off the tag list for these fandoms or characters, let me know!! // Reblogs and comments are appreciated!

[ssamie]

six. she likes someone else, idiot.

oikawa tooru x fem langa!reader

(hq x sk8 the infinity)

warnings: spelling mistakes, swearing, 2k+ words, u have langa’s blue hair sorry 

gen masterlist.            “snow” masterlist.

"as promised, here we are" oikawa greeted her as she opened the door to reveal him and iwaizumi. "good morning " she greeted them with a bubbly smile "hey" iwaizumi nodded at her. 

"oh, you're not skating today, y/n-chan?" oikawa hummed "well, i don't want to accidentally leave you behind again" she said as she closed the door behind her. oikawa sweat dropped and nodded along "how thoughtful" he chuckled 

"here's your coffee, oikawa-san" she had a determined look on her face as she hands him the beverage in a disposable cup

"oh... yes.. my coffee" oikawa deeply inhaled a breath of air and took it from her. "thank you, y/n-chan. i didnt think you were serious about it, though" oikawa laughed as he took a sip of the coffee 

"oh, well i thought you'd be bummed if i forgot a promise" she said 

as soon as she looked away, oikawa gagged and shuddered, making iwaizumi sweat drop and look at him in concern. "dude what the hell?" iwaizumi deadpanned 

as y/n looked back at them, oikawa's dread filled expression quickly changed into one of delight as he happily chugged down the drink 

"haha, i was just amazed at this coffee!" oikawa exclaimed with a grin "and y/n-chan made it so its extra special!" 

"oh, that's great!" y/n cheered as oikawa gave her a thumbs up paired with a wink "im glad you like it" 

"yup! looking forward to the next one tomorrow" oikawa chuckled 

iwaizumi watched the whole thing go down with a look of bewilderment. he was just about done with these two and their shenanigans. "dude.." iwaizumi muttered as he watched oikawa gulp the whole thing down "why're you doing this.."

oikawa turned to him with a grin and clocked his head to the side "what do you mean, iwa-chan?" he asked "i told you, y/n-chan made it so its extra special!" oikawa said with a laugh as he threw the cup away at a random trash can

iwaizumi's eyes widened as he watched his friend jog over to the girl and happily start up a conversation 

"jesus christ.." iwaizumi sighed "i don't know if him being like this is a good thing or not.." 

now, its no secret that y/n was attractive. her features were head turning. and her eyes alone could bring a grown man to their knees. she was quite captivating, to say the least. 

so it shouldn't come as a surprise if boys and girls start flocking around her for the same purpose. 

to have her as their girlfriend. what else? 

"hey, hasegawa-chan" a boy greeted her as she exited the classroom. "oh. hello.." she replied with a hint of confusion 

"are you free today? if you want, i would love to treat you to some snacks after school" the boy said with a nervous chuckle. "oh, thank you but.. i have club duties after school." she said "maybe some other time" 

she then walked away from the boy, absolutely clueless to the fact the she was just asked out on a date. 

from inside the room, oikawa watched the whole thing go down with a look of distaste. "hey, hey, iwa-chan!" he slapped iwaizumi's arm. "that boy just flirted with y/n-chan, look!" 

iwaizumi spared him a glance before looking back down at his comic. "i know, shittykawa." he sighed "its no big deal anyways. she declined, didn't she?" he said 

"it doesn't matter! people are trying to steal her before i could even exit the friend zone!" oikawa exclaimed "actually, im not sure if im even in the friend zone yet!" he pulled at his hair in distress 

"i told her we'd be best friends in the future but that means we're not right now, right?!" 

"you're thinking too much, shittykawa" iwaizumi sighed as he pushed him off his desk, since he was hitting his head repeatedly against the wood 

"im gonna follow her and shoo the boys away" oikawa perked up with a determined look on his face. "dont do that" iwaizumi grunted in annoyance. "and you look stupid. your forehead has a red spot now, dumbass" 

"actually, what if i ask her out before they do?" oikawa hummed thoughtfully to himself. 

"you did that already. didn't she say she has the 'boyfriend spot' reserved for someone?" iwaizumi raised a brow 

"whatever im gonna follow her" oikawa waved him off. "dont do that-- and he's gone." iwaizumi merely sighed as he watched oikawa rush out of the door 

"now.. who is that ugly guy?" oikawa muttered to himself as he watched a boy flusteredly hand y/n a letter 

"h-hasegawa-san..this is for you!" the boy exclaimed as he handed her the letter without making any eye contact. "oh.. its a letter" she muttered as she went to open it 

"no! uh- read it later when you're alone.." the boy stammered out "it's a bit embarrassing for me" he said. "oh, okay then" y/n simply nodded and put it in her pocket. "goodbye" she said as she walked away 

"right! bye, hasegawa-san!" the boy nervously waved 

oikawa sweat dropped as the boy looked at her with a lovesick grin even though she just straight up ignored him and walked off. well it's not like he has room to say anything. he's the exact same, if not, maybe even worse. 

"tch. hey" oikawa called out to the boy. 

"me..?" the boy muttered in confusion as he pointed to himself. "yeah you" oikawa raised a brow as he judgingly looked him up and down "why'd you give y/n-chan a letter?" he scowled 

"oh well i -" before the boy could finish oikawa laughed at him in a mocking way. "yeah yeah, save your voice. it's not like i'll listen to you anyways" he said with his usual charismatic smile 

"but don't do that again, okay~" oikawa cooed "y/n-chan doesn't need a boy toy like you! but maybe try with another girl!" he suggested 

he patted the boy's shoulder and waved him goodbye "good luck~" he cooed. the boy watched oikawa walk off with a look of dread and confusion. "what the hell, man?" the boy muttered 

"now, where is she-- another one?!" oikawa groaned to himself as he watched y/n receive another gift 

except this time, it was a from a girl in the first year who was shakingly handing her a bento with a cutesy note "hasegawa-senpai..! um- this is for you" the girl said as she shyly presented her the neatly wrapped lunch box 

"i made it myself, i hope you like it!" she said with a bow before hastily running off with an alarmingly red face. "..?" y/n cocked her head to the side as she waved the girl goodbye "thank you..?" she muttered 

she opened the bento slightly and gasped in awe at the food 

"no! don't be swayed by the food, y/n-chan!" oikawa silently screamed to himself "its a trick!" 

y/n then closed it and continued to walk away.

"yes! she wasn't swayed by the food. that was close" oikawa let out a sigh if relief as he placed his hand over his pounding chest. "maybe i should cook her food from now on" he muttered as he took a mental note for future use. 

"now--" before he could move another inch, he was suddenly crowded by girls that came out of nowhere. literally. 

"oikawa-senpai!" "oikawa-senpai, we made you a bento!" "oikawa-san i made you cookies, see?" "oikawa-san let's hang out!" 

"ah, hey there girls~" he cooed at them. as much as he wanted to leave them, he couldn't just ignore his fan girls. as annoying as they were, they were still his supporters after all. 

"oikawa-san, are you practicing later? can we watch?" "we'll bring you snacks during practice!" "i'll cheer for you, oikawa-senpai!" 

it had been roughly five minutes since the girls arrived. and it had also been five minutes since he's lost sight of y/n. oikawa was starting to get antsy. his sole purpose was to shoo her admirers away and yet he was being bombarded by his own. 

suddenly, the blue hue which he seemed to grow so fond of caught his eye. he turned to look at her, walking so casually while she frowns down at a piece of paper in her hands 

"y/n! -" sadly his voice was drowned out by the shouts and squeals of the girls, although the noise still got her attention 

y/n looked up to see the brunette waving at her with a girl latched onto his other arm. and being the clueless one that she is, she simply waved back with a smile before walking away 

"that might be the girl he liked.." she muttered with a hum. "he mentioned it at the park that night.." 

"ack! she wasn't jealous at all!" oikawa spluttered with a gasp 

"oikawa-san what are you talking about?" "do you like someone?" "what?! oikawa-senpai, you like someone?!" 

oikawa waved them off and hastily ran after the blue haired girl. "y/n-chan!" oikawa exclaimed as he slammed their classroom door open 

y/n, along with the rest of the class looked over to him in confusion. ".. yes?" y/n replied "ah sorry" he sent the class a peace sign before rushing over to her side 

"i was gonna ask --did  anything interesting happen just now?" he mused with a huff "did ya maybe get something from someone..?" 

oikawa, bless his heart, was trying to be as discreet as he possibly could. though it's not like he has to try since she was probably as dumb as a rock when it comes to shit like this. 

"oh.. i got a letter and a gift" she said as she shuffled through her bag for the said things 

oikawa dramatically cried in his mind as he looked away from her. "she has no shame! so she really doesn't care about my feelings!" he muttered to himself in distress 

"its this." she said 

oikawa reluctantly faced her with a furrowed brows and quivering lips, ready to throw the love letter and bento away. that is, until he actually saw what the 'letter' and 'gift' was. 

"uh what is this?" oikawa sweat dropped as he pointed to the pair of school shoes and a note from the dean. 

y/n sulked as she reluctantly started removing her converse. "i got in trouble today" she said "apparently, im not allowed to wear these" she said as she stuffed her shoes in her bag and slipped the school shoes on 

"well yeah, everyone knows that" iwaizumi sweat dropped. "then how am i gonna skate?" she faced them with exaggeratedly teary eyes as she uncomfortably moved her feet about 

"guess you're gonna have to make do with that" iwaizumi comforted her 

"is that all you got?" oikawa asked again 

"oh. i actually got a love letter and a bento. but that's about it" she casually replied 

oikawa gave her a painfilled smile and a thumbs up. "ah. i see." he grimly replied. "well.. aren't ya gonna give them a response?" oikawa asked followed by a strained laugh 

"i can't.." she mumbled with slight embarrassment 

"why not?" iwaizumi asked 

"i can't read it.." she admitted, her face gradually getting hotter and hotter from shame 

"what?" 

"i can't read it!" she covered her face with her hands "japanese is still hard for me! i can only understand certain parts!" 

"and i also ate the bento because i was tempted!" she confessed 

oikawa and iwaizumi sweat dropped and nodded along. "i see.." oikawa laughed 

"well it's no problem" he said. "you can choose not to respond. you're not really obligated to, anyways." 

"really? that's great!" she perked up. "i didn't know what to do anyway" she chuckled "i could only understand parts of the letter cus i wrote it for reki!" she said 

"im glad im not stuck in that pinch anymore.." she sighed in relief "im not used to people liking me.." 

iwaizumi watched as oikawa's face visibly fell at the mention of the redhead's name. his already pained smile quickly turned into a frown. 

"y/n-chan! can you come here for a sec?" one student called for her "oh sure." y/n replied before quickly making her way to them 

oikawa pouted and trudged over to his seat, plopping himself down on the chair and resting his head on the desk with a huff 

"so, what'll you do now?" iwaizumi asked as he glanced at his friend "dunno" oikawa replied 

"hey iwa-chan. am i ugly?" he asked. "i was gonna say yes but that'll be too mean at the moment. so no, shittykawa. you're not." iwaizumi replied with a sigh as he put his comic away 

"is that reki guy hotter than me?" he asked again. "i dunno, dude" iwaizumi shrugged "i mean, probably." 

"do ya think i have a chance? i mean, i always get with girls so easily!" oikawa huffed. iwaizumi rolled his eyes and hit him on the head with his fist. "wanna know why you don't got a chance, shittykawa?" he said 

"ouch -- yeah sure, enlighten me, iwa-chan" oikawa replied with a wince 

"its cus she likes someone else, idiot." 

oikawa rolled his eyes and rested his chin on his hand, watching y/n converse with another student from across the room 

"just how amazing is this reki guy anyway?" 

"I HAVE 40, 000 YEN AND A SKATEBOARD!" reki exclaimed as he slammed the money and the board down before cherry "IS THIS ENOUGH TO VISIT Y/N, CHERRY?!" he asked with an excited smile 

"for a plane ticket!" reki replied "do ya think if i sell this skateboard i'd get at least a thousand yen?" he asked 

cherry sweat dropped and pushed the things away. "what is this for?" he asked with furrowed brows 

cherry watched the boy fuss with a smile of amusement, chuckling lightly to himself as reki starts listing down the jobs he's done for the money. "a plane ticket costs roughly 15 thousand to 30 thousand yen. with your budget now, you won't be able to afford a trip back home" cherry explained 

"whaaa?" reki groaned out "then i have to work more? but thats so boring! i haven't skated in forever for this!" he whined 

cherry patted his back as the redhead sulked. "don't worry, we'll be going with you anyways" he said "you can borrow money from the gorilla" cherry suggested with a smile 

"why not from you?" reki raised a brow. "because i don't want to." cherry replied 

reki sweat dropped but nodded anyways. he gathered the money and the skateboard before running on his way over to joe's restaurant. 

"JOE HELP!!" reki exclaimed as he slammed the restaurant doors open. "yo, what the hell?!" joe yelled back as he watched reki rush over to him and cling on his arm with a cutesy pout 

"hey hey, joe~" reki cooed "can i borrow money from you? i can right? right? great!" he exclaimed "i'll need 20 000 yen atleast!" reki said with a grin as he held his hands out expectantly 

joe spluttered as he stared down at the redhead. "hey, who said i'll give you money?" he scowled 

"cherry did!" reki exclaimed 

"kaoru.." joe muttered through gritted teeth. "that damn brat." he sighed. "whatever. i'll give ya money." he said. "it's to see y/n right? we've been planning on visiting soon anyway" 

"really?! great! can i have it now-" reki was cut off by joe's laughter. "no, no" joe cooed

"you're gonna have to work for it" he smirked as he pulled out an apron and a menu and shoved it into the redhead's arms. reki's expression morphed into one of dread as he held the apron against his body ".. am i supposed to be a waiter?" he groaned out 

"you're a smart one, aren't ya?" joe said in a teasing tone 

"but why do i have to work?" reki whined. "oh, cmon! it's for y/n, don't ya care about her?" joe taunted him 

reki sent him a glare and reluctantly put the apron on. "for y/n.. sure" he muttered with a blush of embarrassment as joe started ruffling his hair like a child

"hey, joe.." reki trailed off "if i have to work.. the shouldn't he be working too?!" he shrieked out as he pointed to miya who was quietly sitting by a booth. "hah?!" miya exclaimed "i actually have money, unlike you, you slime!" he yelled 

"how?! you're thirteen!" reki shrieked out 

"and you're seventeen but poor! shut up and take my order, slime!" miya hissed back at him 

"i hate you!" reki hissed back "im not letting you near y/n after this, just so you know" he said. miya simply rolled his eyes and huffed. "shut up, slime. i want a drink." he said 

"you shut up" reki muttered back in annoyance, but quickly wrote the order down anyways 

"haha, keep this up and you'll see y/n in no time!" joe cheered as he patted reki's back. "why can't you just give me money, dude?" reki groaned 

joe laughed and sent him a cheeky wink "gotta milk the opportunity, you know?" he mused 

"so you're just using me!!" 

ppl r asking for them to see y/n skate,, dw that's coming soon haha,, and reki and the others are also appearing soon :) 

"exactly!" 

sorry for the spelling / grammar mistakes if there are any :<

[sweetbyte]

Guilty 

BakuMomo - Rated M 

Chapter One | AO3  

Loathe he was to admit it, UA taught him a great deal of things. He wasn’t generous enough to credit that to the instructors, no they all pretty much fucking sucked...as well as the other students and his classmates, hell everyone fucking sucked. However, it was definitely a learning experience. Constantly on the brink of mortal peril and all.

Firstly, he learned that he genuinely, truly, hated just about everyone. Secondly, he learned that he was shockingly lacking emotionally. This was an issue because apparently being a hero required one to show some degree of empathy and support to the general public as if saving their petty lives wasn’t enough. Thirdly, he learned how to tone himself down, so to speak. Mistakes were made, specifically, he made mistakes; he wasn’t perfect. Which ultimately taught him not to judge a book by its cover. Yeah, the spineless annoying Deku was not all weak and worthless as Bakugou claimed. Yeah, he probably owed a lot of his own personal growth to boy. Did that mean he would admit that out loud and apologize to the kid, not a chance in hell. Bakugou still had his damned pride and even though that in itself was another flaw, it was a rather slow work in progress.

When he finally graduated he was brutally honest about not giving a rats ass about any of his classmates’ futures. They were about as one dimensional as the line he struck through the class survey box indicating he would rather not keep in touch with anyone from UA or receive any type of reunion correspondence, thanks. He’d worked with some and caught glimpses of others and although couple were quite persistent to keep his camaraderie, cough Kirishima cough ,it was safe to say that they weren’t in his orbit and that was fine by him.

Fast forward to present day and he finds all that he’s supposedly learned is being challenged by a single unsuspecting walking threat.

Momo Yaoyorozu.

He never had a strong opinion of her, if he was quite frank. She wasn’t completely useless in UA but she wasn’t remarkable either, which he found to be a pity given her quirk. She was the obnoxious type of self-sacrificing sweet that made his teeth rot and left a disgusting aftertaste in his mouth that needed two rinses with listerine, or perhaps alcohol. Whichever was closest on hand.

She’s active when they graduate, that much he knows, but they never cross paths. She apparently specializes in hostage negotiations and emergency relief response and he strictly fights and beats the shit out of anything he’s given permission to. So outside of each other’s orbit and yet they still end up in a frame together of individuals who have been named employee of the year in their respective branch.

Is he surprised? Not really.

She, however, is and its clearly reflected on her face that he resists and urge to sneer at her for old time sakes but, again, he’s learned so he settles for a cold stoic expression. She quickly schools herself as well and offers a small smile but its meaningless to him. They just have to take a photo and he can continue on with his stale Champaign and equally stale career.

Except she’s grown tenacious and is unrelenting in forcing her unsought presence on him, sticking to him like that goopy monstrous wretch he fought so, so many years ago. She’s clearly learned a thing or two working with negotiations and showers him with pricey quality alcohol, an upgrade from the complementary stale bullshit that was being served. He remembers her prestigious background, i.e. fat wallet, and isn’t above admitting that he definitely stayed for the drinks. He figured that it was the least she could do after attracting an absurdly amount of unwanted attention. She’s a hot commodity and even his glower isn’t enough to keep her admirers away. Just to be clear, he wasn’t keeping them away from her, but away from himself. He has enough to deal with just her.

After he’s had his fill in liquor, the startling revelation that Yaoyorozu has indeed become a master strategist is the last clear thing he remembers before his mind and consciousness muffles and thus its also the first thought he has when he wakes up on a strange but very comfortable, velvet maybe, sofa with a groan.

“There’s a glass of water next to you, when you’re ready.” He’d roll his eyes if they weren’t closed.

“Do you usually resort to intoxicating some unsuspecting idiot to use as an excuse to excuse yourself from celebratory functions or am I just special?” His eyes open in time to see her flush guilty, reclined on the arm of the sofa opposite to where his head was resting.

“It’s not as if you truly wanted to be there as well.” She mutters glancing away, determined not to stare at him, her victim. He scoffs.

“Don’t act like you did this for me.”

“I’m not acting, but you cannot solely blame me. It’s not like you chose to keep my company because of my bubbling personality.” She sniffs with destain almost daintily and he jerks up with a sneer.

“I didn’t choose to keep your fucking company, you wouldn’t leave me alone!”

“If you wanted me gone, you definitely could have managed it.” She retorts and raises an eyebrow tauntingly. “It’s not like you’re shy, or are you?” Undiscouraged by his threatening glare she continues. “The fact of the matter is that you choose to stay around me because of the liquor. I did not make you do anything, it was a mere incentive.”

“Of course, to endure your sparkling personality.” He bites scathingly and it makes her face scrunch up like she’s swallowed something bitter. “Right.”

There’s an uncomfortable silence that is only broken by her tired sigh.

“I’m not sure how you are at handling alcohol and I don’t want to assume, but there’s ibuprofen and water right next to you on the coffee table. You’re also welcome to anything in the kitchen.”  She stands and stretches, still dressed up from the party,  and he definitely does not notice the sleekness of her neck as she rolls it or the lift of her assets the dress accentuates. The fucking audacity.

“What, no change of clothes?”

She freezes and blinks. “Oh. That can be arranged if needed.” Her flush has faded and its almost as if she’s already forgotten about him. As if she is counting on him to just be out of her hair as quickly as he can.

“You’re just going to give me free reign of your house out of guilt?”

“I don’t think I’m guilty of-“ He stands with a sudden swiftness that stuns her quiet and he’s walking through her house with sure steps as she sputters after him. “What are you doing?”

“I decided that you can sleep on the couch and I’ll take the bed.”  He declares checking the doors for the bedroom.

“Excuse me?!”

“Think of it as your penance. You know, if our roles would have been reversed, this would have been a very controversial situation.” He states matter-of-factly leaning against the jamb of her room and her flush deepens.

“There was never any ill intent and you know it!” Her newly disheveled and agitated appearance sends a jolt of satisfaction through him.

“Do I?” He promptly shuts the door before she can react locking her out. She knocks on the door frantically and yells.  “Bakugou! This isn’t funny!” Then after a moment, “I don’t have a change of clothes!”

He makes a show of slamming some closet and drawer doors to make her panic. They both know she has the power to get into her room and he wonders if he’ll force her to break her own door down.

She soon quiets and huffs away and while she’s left him in peace he takes the opportunity let the last couple of moments sink in. Her room is, well, grand yet minimal. It’s fitting for her. It’s oddly still yet cozy. He decides to take her spacious chaise by the window, she can think he slept in her bed all she wants, he knows a thing or two about boundaries and he’d rather not cross that one.

She doesn’t return and he’s not all that surprised, she was never one for a fight.

Despite himself Bakugou lets out a laugh. He laughs because he can picture her in that expensive uncomfortable dress, flushed and irate on her velvet couch all because of him.

He laughs because he rather likes the sight of such a pristine individual like Yaoyorozu, pink and breathless, because of him and if that isn’t the funniest joke of the century he doesn’t know what was. 

AN:  I feel guilty for not updating anything in years, don’t judge me.

[theonewiththefanfics]

At Arm’s Length (Part 5)

 Synopsys: Modern!AU

Bucky Barnes is the co-owner of ‘Barnes and Rogers’. The Reader is the secretary for Stark Industries. Both are childhood friends and madly in love. Things couldn’t be more perfect. But when something happens at Reader’s work, things might change and it will test to what lengths the pair is willing to go to find their happy ending.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Genre: angst

Warnings: swearing, mentions of accidents and hospitals and injuries

Word count: 2298

Italics are flashbacks

Bucky was halfway through throwing things in his suitcase and mentally trying to check everything off a list he might need in Spain, when the doorbell rang. The absolute want to telepathically punch whoever was on the other side of the door and taking away every precious minute was almost as unbearable as that time Y/N had made him try out sushi and he’d had to pretend not to hate it.

Practically running, Bucky got to the door and ripped it open only to be greeted by a bewildered Steve at his actions.

“What?” Bucky shook his head. “What do you want?”

“You in a hurry of some kind?”

“Actually yes.” He stepped away from the door and allowed Steve to come inside the loft, quickly shutting it and grabbing the dirty whiskey glass before placing it into the sink and washing it out. “I’m going to Barcelona.”

Steve blanked for a second. “Barcelona?”

“Yes, Barcelona. Just because you repeat it won’t change the name of the city.”

His friend scoffed, and Bucky threw him a dirty gaze, but Steve just bit down on his lip. There was only one reason Bucky would be in such a frenzy, and it wasn't a secret (not that he was trying to keep it that way). 

“I’m assuming you talked to Y/N," Steve more so stated rather than asked.

The brunet sighed and nodded.

“And I assume it didn’t go over too well…”

“Nope,” Bucky murmured and plopped onto the couch. “In fact, it’s probably the worst way everything could’ve gone, which is why I need to go and see her face-to-face.”

“How so?” 

“She admitted she loved me. But…” Bucky let out a shaky breath and closed his eyes like it would erase her words from existence. “Then she said it’s not enough.”

“Did she actually say she’s in love with you?” In all honesty, Steve was quite stunned. Yes, he knew Y/N was most definitely capable of love and loved the people in her life as fiercely as the sun burned in the sky, but actually saying those words… that was not something she took lightly. And especially in the context, Bucky made sure his words were heard.

“Well not exactly. But when she asked me for a reason not to move on, and I said because she loved me as I love her, she didn’t deny it… and that’s good enough for me.”

Steve looked at his friend, the determination on his face. There was no way he’d be able to stop him (not that he wanted to), but at the same time, it was his job as his partner to get that brain living in romance-land back into the real world as well. “Well before you go, I think you should know, that whatever happened last night, has become an absolute mess. More than it already was.”

Bucky’s brows furrowed. “What do you mean? What’s a mess?”

Steve huffed. “This.”

From the inside of his jacket, Steve took out a roll of paper and unfolded it, placing it on the glass coffee table. In front of both men was a newspaper, a picture of Bucky’s face all over it, but not in a flattering sort of way. Especially with the title in big bold letters read ‘Is the fairytale already over? Bucky Barnes was seen cosying up to Tony Stark’s personal assistant Natalia Alianova Romanova minutes after professing his love on live TV to the recently promoted Stark Industries secretary Y/N Y/L/N.’

He threw the paper back onto the table, not even bothering to look at the full article. “This is bullshit," he gritted through his teeth. "It’s absolute bullshit. Look,” Bucky sighed placing a hand on his hip and running the prosthetic one through his already dishevelled hair. “I can't do this right now, I need to get to Y/N first. I’ll deal with it when I get back. I’m going to Barcelona.”

Steve crossed his arms over his chest. “To do what – forcibly make Y/N come back?”

And that set off Bucky. “I can’t lose her! Not after everything that has happened! I can’t just sit on this fucking couch and wait until she is transferred back because guess what – that’s not happening! I’ve let life dictate everything too much, so it’s time I take it into my own hands.”

The desperation was laced in every single syllable of his words, as Steve understood what he meant.

***

Bucky had never been this close to death. Scratch that. The only other time Bucky had been this close to death was when he had tried to sneak out of his room in eleventh grade to go with Steve and Y/N to a midnight movie showing, after failing his math exam. His mom hadn’t been too happy about the results, to put it mildly, so when Winifred Barnes had seen her son try and climb through the window after she'd downgraded his curfew to nine PM… let’s just say, Bucky didn’t join for movie nights for a month.

But as the train violently swished off of the tracks, his body tossed around the inside like a ragdoll, Bucky truly thought he was going to die. The train rolled to the side and continued to skid along the way. A sharp pain shot down from his left shoulder to his abdomen and up to his head, and that’s when the darkness came.

It wasn’t all-encompassing darkness as Bucky thought death would be. It was warm, where he thought it would be cold, and soothing where he thought it would rip him apart. But all of that he could attribute to the fact that even after years of not seeing her, barely catching up with phone calls and texts as they had gone their separate academic ways, Y/N was the one that brought him peace.

She was there, in the blackness, sitting shoulder to shoulder with him, and her gentle laughter filled the air around him, fueling Bucky with nothing but love. 

God, how he loved her. He’d been too scared to ruin their friendship and too scared to mess up the dynamic between him, her and Steve, but now he didn’t have to worry about that. 

Death was comfortable, it was as soft as Y/N’s hands and as gentle as the look in her eyes, and Bucky wasn’t even half-mad about going, as long as she led him through into the light.

But when he got to the end, the light was too bright and stung his eyes, and the soft palm that had slid in his had transformed into a rough and scratchy one, and Bucky’s blue eyes opened up to see a sterile room rather than what he thought would be heaven in the form of Y/N's old bedroom. 

Steve’s eyes were red as if he had been crying for days on end when their blue orbs met.

“I’m sorry,” his friend choked out, brain barely processing Bucky was awake, spewing out the first thing that came to it, the guilt eating at his insides. “They tried everything.”

“What?” Bucky slurred and tried to roll his head to the side when blearing hot pain shot through his side. That’s when the warmth he’d felt disappeared and the sharp reality set in, the horrid memories of what had happened coming back in painful waves. He didn't need to glance to his left to understand what he'd paid to stay alive. The bandages across his chest and the stump where his arm used to be said it all.

But even then, Bucky turned his head back to look at Steve and gave him a tight-lipped smile, teeth digging into his bottom lip as he desperately tried to keep it from wobbling to somehow comfort his friend.

“You gotta swear something to me, Steve." Bucky immediately stated, mind running a mile a minute. "Right now.”

“Anything,” he said through a hiccup. “You know I’d do anything for you, Buck.”

“We don’t tell Y/N about this shit.”

Steve was flabbergasted. They told Y/N everything. It was practically wired into all of their DNAs to share stuff with one another, so when Bucky demanded silence about the accident, Steve’s head didn’t compute the request.

“We can’t,” Bucky reiterated, squeezing Steve's palm with his remaining hand. “We can’t tell her.”

“And why the fuck not? She’s our friend! Our best friend!”

“Because she’s gonna flip.”

Steve scoffed. “As any normal person would. I can’t lie to her about something like this.”

“We’re not gonna be lying. We’re just not gonna say anything.”

“Why?”

Bucky bit down on his lip before looking up at the ceiling, attempting but ultimately failing to keep the tears at bay. “Because I don’t want her to look at me in any different way. I don’t want her to worry or stress.”

“Buck, she deserves to know.”

“He sighed looking back at his friend. “I know… but she deserves to finish her degree.”

Steve shook his head. “How does this factor into her getting her fucking education?”

“This is Y/N we’re talking about!” Bucky let out a teary chuckle.  “She’d drop anything and everything if she found out! Fuck, she’d run over after hearing that you got off scots free," and Bucky breathed out that statement with pure relief in his voice, as he gave Steve a once-over to make sure his eyes weren't deceiving him. "She'd do that just to see for herself that you’re alright. I can’t let her do that to her life.” Bucky finally looked at the stump that once was his left arm. “She deserves to grow and flourish before any of this shit baggage comes into her life. The recovery will be long, I'm not delusional. And she doesn’t need to see all of the crap that’s gonna happen.”

“Don’t you think it’s unfair to Y/N?” Steve bit his lip. “She’d want to be here to support you.”

“I know,” Bucky sighed. “But I couldn’t handle seeing her in pain. In any amount of pain… so please, Steve… don’t tell her about any of this.”

And with a resigned sigh, he took hold of Bucky’s one remaining palm and squeezed it. “I won’t. I promise.”

Two years and a month later after the accident.

“I deserved to know!”

Bucky let out a terrified shudder. He took it back. The train wasn’t the closest he’d ever been to death. This, the moment he told it to Y/N, was. “I – I know, but –“

“What ‘but’?! There is no ‘but’! I deserved to fucking know! Bucky, I loved you! I still do! You’re my family as is Steve, and the thought of having potentially lost you…” She chocked back and sob and placed a hand over her mouth. She had to take a deep breath before she could continue. “The fact that you didn’t want me there for you, honestly hurts like shit. Did – do I mean so little to you?”

“Sweetheart, you’re my entire world! Please don’t ever think that I don’t trust you or love you. I do,” he whispered bringing her head to his chest, which she reluctantly placed there, hearing Bucky’s erratic heartbeat. “I love you more than you’ll ever be able to understand, but you didn’t deserve to see the shit I had to deal with. It was nasty and horrible and brutal, and I’d never want to put you through something like that," he muttered in her Y/H/C locks, kissing her head.

“I don’t care about that!” She sniffled grasping onto the back of his shirt. “I’d change your fucking diapers if I’d had to. I would’ve dropped everything to help you!”

Bucky pulled her face back, head cupped between his palms, a pained smile on his face. “Exactly! Because you’re amazing, and kind and sweet and care for others and their happiness more than you care for your own! I couldn’t let you do that! You were so close to getting your degree. I wasn’t about to ruin it.”

“Bucky, you’ve never ruined anything.”

“Even your tenth birthday celebration?”

And that’s when she let out a small chuckle, but it was like a symphony of angels to Bucky’s ears. His Y/N was back, the smile he'd fallen in love with once again on her face. “Okay, maybe just that one thing. But I don’t hold that against you. More so the bad leftover shrimp you had.” She placed her palm against his cheek, and he leaned into her touch. “Please, don’t keep things from me. Especially something as big as that. I want to be there for you. Through thick and thin, I wanna be able to help.”

Bucky couldn’t help the tears that brimmed at his lower lash line. “I love you, you know that?”

“I love you too,” she mumbled pressing a small kiss to where his prosthetic connected to his shoulder. “Now let’s eat that pizza and watch ‘Friends’. You owe me. Big time.”

***

“And what are you gonna say? When you get to Barcelona?” Steve asked, finally realizing there was no way he could talk his friend out of what he had set his mind on. The blond would be lying if he said, he wasn’t at least somewhat excited that Bucky flying out could potentially get Y/N her head out of her ass and agree to at least try a long-distance thing. He'd been watching from the sidelines as his two friends loved the other from afar, and his heart ached for them.

Bucky shrugged his shoulders. “The same thing I told her before – that I love her, have for a while, and I’m not ready to give up on something that hasn’t even started yet.”

“And then?”

“And then… and then I can only hope she doesn’t make me leave.”

Tags (crossed out wouldn’t take):

Everything tags: @lumelgy @palaiasaurus64​ @supernaturalbaesduh​ @breezy1415 @crazy--me @thatawkwardlittlefangirl​ @sea040561​ @staryeyedgirl​ @deathbyarabbit​ @s-c-a-r-e-d-po-t-t-e-r @reblogger-not-a-blogger @m-a-t-91​ @dalilx​ @i-need-a-hero-i-need-a-loki @maladaptive-ninja-returns​ @averyrogers83​ @in-the-end-im-still-trash​ @gallifreyansass​ @dewy-biitch​ @avxgers​ @unlikelygalaxygiver​ @magicwithaknife​ @ollyoxenfrees​ @bnhvrdy​ @tvwhoresblog @celebsimagines @thatkindofgurl​ @sj-thefan​ @teenwolflover28 @lestersglitterglue​ @im-squished​ @strangersstranger​

At Arm’s Length tags: @impalatobakerstreet​ @slender--spirit​ @janineabad @salty-buchanan @chrisevans1fan @dyanna-corona​ @chook007​ @lost-and-wandering-alone​ @goalie-love @nerdgirljen​ @jediviolet​ @fandomly-writings​ @densewaffle @hawkxyes @mizzzpink​ @nishanki1​ @misplacedorphan​ @dylan5573​ @onespideyboi @nerdygirlwithacrush​ @rumlow-barnes-kulina @wantonmeep​ @savemesteeb​ @hoe4sebastian @dreambutdontsleepx​ @marvelismysafezone​ @cap-just-said-language​

Bucky tag list: @thunderous-flower @who-cares-rn​ @projectxhappiness​ @callmebucky-doll​ @coal000​ @killuaenthusiast @courtneychicken​ @sophiealiice​ @raquelbc2003 @watch-out-for-thorns​ @potentially-kinetic​ @thatonegirljessy99​ @proxinge @bbkenna @buckysclub @ulired @fangirlofeverythingbasically @mrsalh32611​ @horrorx570ximagines​ @the-nargles-made-me-do-it​ @pooslie​ @itsisabelanotisabella @httpmcrvel​ @purplebananatragedy​ @pxrrishly​ @parker-barnes-af​ @skulliebythesea​ @california-grown​ @stevehesaidabadlanguageword @belongsto-prachi​ @hello-i-am-insane​ @its-nott-my-problem @emmalbg @hopeinahotbox​

Marvel tags: @nerissa98​ @happyseagrill​ @asguardiansoftheavengers​ @crazybutconfidentaf​ @wishingforahome​ @pizzarollpatrol​ @desir-ae​

A/N: soooo, I guess I’m continuing this, although for whatever reason my fics won’t show up in the Bucky tags, so if you could reblog it please do so as it would greatly help :)

Also sometime on Friday I’ll make a masterpost of every tag list I have and everyone who’s tagged in what. I have loads of accounts I can’t seem to tag, and some of it might be due to the fact that these accounts have changed their names, and if you’re one of them and still would like to remain on the list I’d like it if you sent me a message with your old name so I can update it. If not I’ll just remove the untaggable name :)

P.S. hope you like this :)

P.S.S. please don’t plagiarise or repost my works on different platforms (wattpad, AO3 etc) without my specific written persmission.

[tinyshe]

Spiritual challenges of depression

Spiritual challenges of depression

Resources for Catholics Living With Depression

   For people of faith, depression may raise serious questions of a spiritual nature: doubts about God’s faithfulness, the value of religious faith, the efficacy of prayer, or the sincerity of the church community. While some individuals find comfort and courage in their religious convictions during depression, others feel betrayed or abandoned.    If you are a person of faith coping with depression, remember that faith is never a guarantee that bad things will not happen, even though we sometimes were taught to believe that it is. In fact, faith is the conviction that all will eventually be well, in spite of the bad things that happen. Faith enables us to respond with determination and hope when we experience painful, inexplicable and unwelcome personal suffering.  Every prayer is, first of all, an expression of our belief that God is at work in the world, fixing what needs to be fixed and healing what needs to be healed--all in God's own way and in God's own time. If you are a person of faith who is living with depression, here are some general suggestions which you might find helpful: • Continue to pray, even if it means changing when, how or why you pray.     During a period of depression many people lose the will or the ability to actually “say” prayers. This is a time for developing a new way to pray by sitting quietly and letting God speak to you. Be attentive to the various ways, occasions, and circumstances in which you might be hearing God's voice for the first time. Some people keep a journal during difficult times to record thoughts, feelings and impressions which might reveal God's presence and direction in their lives. Others discover the value of joining a prayer group, finding a prayer partner, or using a prescribed form of prayer such as the daily Liturgy of the Hours, the Rosary, Centering or Meditative Prayer.  Some individuals find reading the Psalms or the Book of Lamentations a helpful way to identify and express their feelings in a prayerful way.  If depression leaves you without energy or attention for prayer, you might simply repeat the simple Jesus Prayer: "Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me." • Continue to participate as fully as possible in the spiritual and sacramental life of the faith community.

    If you are Catholic, consider celebrating the Sacraments of Healing -- Reconciliation (Confession) and Anointing of the Sick.  Although the Sacraments and prayer may not lead directly to relief from depression, they open us to a deeper awareness of God's love and compassion. They remind us that God cares about us and wishes us well, even though we are imperfect, unfinished, and sometimes sinful persons. As the United States Catholic Catechism for Adults explains anointing, "even when there is no physical healing, the primary effect...is a spiritual healing by which the sick person receives the Holy Spirit's gift of peace and courage to deal with the difficulties that accompany serious illness."

   There are regular times scheduled each week in local parishes for the Sacrament of Reconciliation, usually before a weekend Mass and most parishes schedule communal celebrations of the Anointing of the Sick at various times throughout the year.  However, under the circumstances it might be best for you to schedule a specific time for either or both of these sacraments with a local pastor.  In addition, if there is a Catholic Charismatic Community near you, contact a member and ask to attend a Catholic Healing Mass or arrange for a member of the group to prayer with and for you. • Continue to participate as fully as possible in the life and worship of the faith community.

    The Sacrament of the Eucharist is always the most powerful and important of all the sacraments, but in some cases, during a period of depression many persons lose the motivation or energy to actively participate in public worship.  In some cases, persons find it difficult to feel comfortable or welcome in a faith community where people around them seem completely unaware or unconcerned about their personal suffering. It is helpful to remember that most members of the faith community have suffered painful disappointments, losses and failures in their own lives and would be sympathetic to your situation, although they may not know exactly what to say or do.  Their continued presence in the faith community is a reminder that our shared faith helps all of us survive painful and difficult situations like depression.

   In addition, there are some practical things you can do if attending church is difficult: • change the time of Mass you attend; or, if your parish offers a more reflective "quiet" Mass, choose that Mass over one which is more active and upbeat; • change the place where you sit in church; • ask a good friend to accompany you to church; or • attend a different parish until you feel comfortable returning to your original parish. • Continue to seek the support and advice of good friends, a trusted personal confidant, or a wise spiritual director.

    No one knows the pain of depression better than people who have experienced depression, so individuals or support groups of people who are living with depression are an important and valuable resource. So are good friends, although they may not know what to say or how to be helpful. The important thing is to find someone who can walk with you, at your own pace, through this painful experience.  People who want to "fix things" too soon are not very helpful; people who say they know exactly how you feel probably don't and may not be very helpful either. If you are troubled about spiritual questions related to your depression, it is important to find a spiritual director, pastor, pastoral staff person or faith-based counselor in whom you can confide and whose advice you trust. • Continue to grow and deepen your faith in God's mercy and love.

    While depression is not strictly speaking a spiritual condition and we cannot "pray it away", it may be triggered or aggravated by other emotional or spiritual issues.  At the root of these emotional and spiritual problems is often a failure to accept and live with the fact that we are limited, incomplete, imperfect, and sinful human beings.  We cannot control everything in our lives; we cannot have everything we desire; we cannot do well everything we would like to do; we cannot protect ourselves or our loved ones from sorrow, pain and loss.  In other words, as Adam and Even discovered, we are not God, and we cannot save ourselves. In fact, we are all dependent on God and on other people to help us live peacefully with our limitations, disappointments and failures.   When the people we want or expect to help us are unable or unwilling to do so, we must find and accept others who can help, always trusting that God works in unexpected and mysterious ways.  In the end, we must surrender everything, even our very lives, to God's mercy and love; all that remains is the love we have given and received.  That is why many spiritual guides say much of life is really about preparing to die well.

   For many Catholic Christians through the ages, the most perfect example of a human being who was able to accept her own limitations and opportunities was the Blessed Virgin Mary, who accepted God's plan for the incarnation of Jesus Christ with courage and trust.  For that reason, Mary's reponse may be our most perfect prayer in times when we are struggling with limitations and disappointments.           “My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord.  My spirit rejoices in God my savior.           For the Lord has looked upon his handmaid’s lowliness; behold, from now on will           all ages call me blessed.           The Mighty One has done great things for me, and holy is his name. God's mercy is           from age to age to those who fear him.           God has shown might with his arm, dispersed the arrogant of mind and heart. He has           thrown downthe rulers from their thrones but lifted up the lowly.  The hungry he has           filled with good things; the rich he has sent away empty.           God has helped Israel his servant, remembering his mercy, according to his promise           to Abraham and to his descendants forever.”     Although depression may challenge your understanding of faith, your relationship to God, or your relationship to the faith community, it can become an opportunity for an even deeper, more sustaining spiritual life. As in most matters related to faith, the real challenge is to learn to grow in trust and hope. Related Links: • Download a checklist to determine if you are suffering from Spiritual Stress due to depression. • Learn how faith grows and changes in response to circumstances in our lives. • Return to Information for Catholics Living With Depression. • Find more resources for living with depression. • Examination of Conscience for the Depressed • What Is a Healing Mass? > The Prayer of Lament

Disclaimer This information is not provided by medical professionals and is not intended as a substitute for professional medical help or personal therapy.  If you are in need of immediate help, contact a medical professional, a suicide prevention hotline, or call 9-1-1.

[Last Update: 01.07.21]