#but to Amanda i think she wants to take it slow and in this case slow is secret and it's all because she's been burned so many times before

[skullchicken]

heyyy you can help me out if you like because I have choice paralysis about which project to work on while I take a break from my other projects ;_;

More Info/Synopsis under the cut!

(Sorted from how long they've been rotated from most to least so far)

Action/fantasy webtoon about a cursed school where students turn into monsters:

The class clown turns into an actual monster-clown, the sporty girls become cheerleader-zombies, the annoying little elementary school brats turn into screaming dolls and the teachers turn into boss monsters.

The only three people seemingly unaffected are Miyako (metalhead, bff of Cally), Cally (goody two-shoes, Miyako's bff) and Achintya (nerd, unrelated). With the former two, the reasons seems because they're not quite human themselves. But what's up with that shady little nerd? And he seems to know more than he lets on...

Whatever the case may be, they must lift the curse before things escalate.

Okay, so, imagine a Shounen Manga, except the demographic is all genders and women are people. Miyako, since she's secretly a demon, takes after a typical shounen battle protagonist, while Cally is a fairy and falls more into the magical girl mold. As for Achintya... he's complicated.

Shadowrun-action-romance-novel about fixing malicious DRM on cyberware, m/f

Working title: You owe me

A story about maliciously designed cyberware, trust-issues, debt, being in your twenties, guilt and a wrestler-elf and hacker-dwarf being dumbass idiots who pine for one another and secretly think the other person is the best thing since sliced bread. Slow-ish burn.

The good news is, I have like a hundred pages already written. The bad news is, I would have to rewrite a lot of it because my writing process has changed a lot. But let me say no more, take a gander at our romantic leads, ladies, gentlemen and those that lieth betwinxt:

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

He is wearing a gorilla mask for plot-reasons.

Webtoon fantasy/romance remake of a story where a girl marries the carrot king

There is an german fairytale written by the guy who also wrote the nutcracker which is bonkers and hilarious and I'd looove to adapt it into webtoon format. I wrote about it here: click meee

I would update the story so it takes place in modern times and deals with the issue of aesthetics versus being... (think e.g. cottagecore versus actual farming) in short "it is fine and dandy to dream, in fact it's very important... but if you're too keen to only believe what you want to be true, you're gonna get duped."

But most importantly it would give me ample reason to draw a carrot with a handsome anime-face.

Shadowrun-mystery-novel about the worship of dragons (Blackout Sequel)

I wrote a shadowrun short story about loneliness, vulnerability, yakuza and mysterious lemon cake. I have ideas for a sequel - granted they are quite nebulous as of now, but I'm confident I'm reaching the point where I can start fleshing them out. This time around the story would be longer and more involved. The theme would be the worship of dragons, not just in the literal sense, but also in how people relate to power.

We would also see how the relationship between Hanne and Amanda progresses. I personally wish friendships would receive as much attention and nuance as romantic relationships and here I would attempt such a thing.

Webtoon-action-romance about the housing market and identity, f/f

Anansi and Muu meet, one day, via the matrix, when they stumble upon each other trying to get entry into the same matrix club. The reason they're here are quite different. Muu, a corporate princess, just hit her thirtieth birthday, only received presents she didn't like and has a minor crisis about it. Anansi, who is a technomancer, is always on the run and here to meet a Mr Johnson.

While Muu's journey is, at first, internal, as she starts to try out different avatars to figure out who she even is, Anansi holds on for dear life as a squatter and, gets screwed over with the payment and sets out to find that damn Johnson to make him pay one way or another.

Their paths in life are quite different, yet they keep running into each other and, despite everything, find themselves drawn to each other.

And then it turns out their worlds are not as far apart as suspected.

I would be quite excited about this one because I've never written a f/f romance before, despite being very, very bi (granted I've also never finished writing a m/f romance, but still). Mostly I just really like the characters and I think the story would be solid and not too convoluted... as mine tend to get sometimes :,)

... but I'm equally excited to do all of these! What do you say?

[storiesofsvu]

Under Over Ch 14

Joe Velasco x reader warnings: regular svu type conversation.

The precinct was having a relatively slow day, Carisi had just finished making a deal with Barth, Amanda was going through the Elite case, adding in the last update from Velasco. Olivia was in her office finishing up a very annoying call with McGrath while Fin was looking through the giant pile of Jane Doe’s from Melinda trying to match any of them with sapphire. They had all figured on it being a pretty tame day, most of them hoping to skip out a little early, Carisi pausing at Amanda’s desk on his way out in an attempt to make some dinner plans, seeing if the sitter could stay a little later.

Liv was finally off the phone, thankful to hopefully have another twenty four hours she didn’t have to hear McGrath’s voice. She let out a little sigh, pushing back from her desk and moving through the bull pen to grab a fresh coffee, a little bit of small talk and laughter bouncing through the room. Carisi gave the team a quick goodbye and swiftly left the building, knowing he had an arraignment later that morning to get to. Olivia was about to retreat back to her office when the elevator pinged and there was a flurry of movement that caught her eye, she wasn’t quite sure what was going on until she realized who it was.

“Velasco?” Her brow furrowed, “I didn’t think we had anything scheduled ‘til next week?”

“It couldn’t wait.” He replied, his chest heaving and Amanda finally glanced up from her desk, taking in his workout attire.

“What? You run the entire way here?” She said with a tease in her voice and he was suddenly taken aback, realizing that he had, simply letting the adrenaline take over.

“What’s going on?” Liv asked, placing her mug down on Amanda’s desk as Joe crossed through the room.

“I think we need to move in on the Elite… now.”

“Whoa..” Olivia started, a hand up to slow Joe down a second, “I think we’re doing fine. You’ve had things under control pretty well, and as long as you still think we can flip y/n then I say we keep working until you’re sure she’ll cooperate.”

“Y/n’s missing.” Joe deadpanned, tossing the bracelet down onto Amanda’s desk and everyone tensed, “I found that on one of the offbeat paths in Thompkins on my run. Those are the bracelet’s the Elite use, and hers was diamond. No one’s seen her since the morning after the murder, she hasn’t responded to any texts or phone calls, and Carly said some of her stuff is cleared out from her room.”

“You sure she didn’t just run?” Fin asked and Joe shook his head.

“Absolutely not. Carly told me last night that y/n said she was gonna get her out in the next couple of weeks. Those two are practically sisters, she wouldn’t just abandon her out of nowhere.”

“Any thoughts?” Amanda glanced up at him with a sympathetic look on her face.

“I really don’t know. They don’t know what happened to sapphire yet, whoever has her bracelet is the one that killed her, but it’s turned off. Kayra’s losing his shit, he was screaming at the girls last night, high outta his mind… he’s so close to snapping, and I’m worried more girls are going to die.” He glanced up to Liv, “especially if we don’t do something.”

“You said it yourself Velasco…” her voice was soft, knowing how badly he wanted to make things right, “without y/n we don’t have a case.” She paused to let it sink in before she spoke again, “are you sure that’s her bracelet?”

Joe let out a huff, picking it up from the desk, praying that it wasn’t dead as he pressed the button to turn it on, letting out a little sigh when it sprung to life, vibrating in his hand. That was the first clue, the confirmation came when he opened the app and the little flashing dot of diamond was the sixteenth precinct. He handed the phone to Liv who let out a sigh, running her hand over her face before handing it back and he quickly shut the bracelet off.

“Do you remember exactly where you found that?”

“Yeah.” He nodded, “I marked the spot and the end of the path where it meets the main one.”

“Okay. We’ll get CSU out there, see if they can find anything.”

“Thank you.”

“As for the ring, there isn’t much we can do yet. Things are still under control, okay?” Liv urged, “I know it seems like now’s the time to make the move but we can afford to wait a couple of days still. Y/n could turn up completely unharmed, she was a key player in all of this, and you mentioned something at the start that she might have something going on with Kayra?”

“I wasn’t sure then, but now I know there isn’t. She plays into things to get her way, to make sure she stays in the good books, but she doesn’t like him, and doesn’t want him around.”

“What about the other girls?” Fin asked.

“Carly’s scared. Didn’t want to go back to the penthouse last night. She knows without y/n around there’s nothing stopping Kayra from taking out his aggression on them, and judging by the vibe in the house yesterday, I’d say most of them agree.”

“We could try to flip some of them?” Amanda suggested.

“I doubt we could without alerting a higher up or breaking my cover.” Joe replied.

“So we’re stuck.” Fin said and there was a collective sigh let out, “for y/n… what about that politician that likes her so much?”

“He hasn’t heard from her. Got a refund cause she didn’t show at the party last night, I talked to him myself.”

“Okay.” Liv broke into the conversation, “so for now, we keep working. I’ll call CSU, Fin, keep going through those Jane Doe’s to see if we find a match. Velasco, do you think it’s worth it to put out a missing persons for y/n?”

“I think we might be passed that point.” He replied, trying to hold back the worry in his voice.

“You think she’s….” Amanda couldn’t bring herself to finish the sentence off and Joe shot her a look that made her heart sink.

“Besides, she doesn’t have any social media, there’d be no photo of her and those sketches are crap.”

“Alright.” Liv let out a little sigh, “maybe you can get back into the house? Talk to some of the other girls? Carly seems to trust you.”

“Yeah. Next party’s in a couple of days, I’ll keep everyone updated.”

“Thanks Velasco.” She replied before turning back to her office.

Joe let out a little sigh, shaking his head before he trudged into the breakroom. With the adrenaline rush he hadn’t realized just how long he’d ran, especially without breakfast, coffee or water. He swiped a bottle of water from the fridge and a crueler from the counter before dropping into one of the chairs, swigging back the water before it came to rest at the table in front of him.

“You okay?” Amanda’s voice asked softly from the doorway, the door shutting behind her as he glanced up.

“Would you even believe me if I lied?”

“Not in the least.” She crossed to the counter, filling up a cup of coffee for herself before approaching the table, “you mind?” He shook his head and she took a seat across from him. “You’re really worried about her, aren’t you?”

“Yeah…”

“You said she seemed to know what she was doing, right? I’m sure she’s just out on some bender or some john whisked her away out of town this week, shit like that’s gotta happen all the time with a group like this.”

“Not with her. She’s only ever left town with David, and it’s not like her to miss a party, especially one with him. I was trying to hope there was something else going on but once I saw that bracelet….”

“You really think she could be dead?” She asked softly and he finally dared to look up at her, trying to avoid the tears misting in his eyes and nodded solemnly.

“I think it’s my fault…” his voice was barely above a whisper and Amanda wilted at it, realizing just how important this case and finding you was to him.

“What happened?”

“We…. Connected really well, right from the start. That’s why I chose her for my intel… about a month ago, she was over at my place.” Amanda raised a brow, trying not to let a smirk take over her lips as that was roughly when she’d popped by for an accidental surprise visit, Joe hesitated and she nudged at his leg with her foot under the table.

“Hey… whatever happened, happened. I’m not gonna rat you out, I’ve done my fair share of shifty shit both undercover and not undercover to save my own ass. Promise.” Joe studied her for a moment, she’d been the most involved with this case from the start and he did honestly trust her, he’d heard about some of her past and knew she wasn’t kidding.

“Things got…a little unprofessional.” He admitted, “she left with a hickey. The next night I stopped by the penthouse to drop off a package and she had a bad black eye. Claimed it wasn’t Kayra but she had to be lying…”

“What happened the night before she disappeared?”

“It was the night sapphire was killed.” He let out a sigh, “she ended up at my place. She was the one who found sapphire, even had a bit of blood on her, she was so out of it. I calmed her down, said she was safe and could stay as long as she needed. The next morning her phone was going crazy, she freaked over something and ran off before I could even think about asking a question. I..” he took a shaky breath, “I didn’t even realize it until today when I found the bracelet, but…she had it on that night…”

“With the GPS?” Amanda winced and he nodded.

“Yeah… Kayra would’ve known exactly where she was…”

“And I’m sure he didn’t like that.”

“No.” He ran a hand over his face, taking a sip of water, “Amanda… she can’t be… I don’t know if I can…” He stopped to take a heavy breath, not wanting to finish any sentence right now, or admit everything to her, he just hadn’t had someone to talk things through with. Her head tilted as she thought, her coffee mug coming to settle on the table between them.

“This wasn’t just some casual hook up thing, was it?”

“What? No! I never said that.” He defended and she smirked.

“She was at your place and left with a hickey… you admitted that. And now I’m doubting that thong was some old college friend?”

“She wanted out,” he deflected, “we talked about it. She wanted a future… Call me dumb all you want but this wasn’t just her playing me, I watched her do that at parties, this was different. And if I’m the reason she’s… gone… it should’ve been me.”

“Don’t say that.” Amanda reached across the table, squeezing at his hand, “and we don’t know anything yet, okay? Don’t start the whole blame game when there’s still plenty of options.”

“I just don’t want to lose her Rollins.”

“We’ll find her.” She gave another squeeze, moving back to her coffee, “did you end up telling her you’re a cop?”

“No.” He groaned, burying his face in his hands, “which is a whole other reason for her to hate me.”

Before Amanda could respond, Fin opened the door, poking his head in,

“Hey, Phoebe just called, Vice just stumbled upon a body they think could be sapphire.” He spoke of his wife, the sergeant over at Manhattan South Vice, the two departments had worked multiple cases together over the years, “Velasco, you’ve met her, can you make the ID?”

“Yeah.” He replied, pushing up from the table, taking the water and crueler with him, if he couldn’t do anything to try and find you right now, the very least he could do was find some closure for the other parts of this case.

___________ @witches-unruly-heart @fandom-princess-forevermore @cycat4077 @xoxabs88xox @alwaysachorusgirl @teamsladsandgentss @thatesqcrush @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @wandas-wife @katieslotherford @almatra @momlifebehard @dondivajadee

[merv606]

The Mr. Miyagi’s room scene.

We know Daniel doesn’t deal with anything - doesn’t process it, but this really hammers that fact home.

“Amanda I don’t go in there”

Not - you know I don’t go in there or Amanda I don’t go in there, you know that.

A blunt statement / absolute almost.

He doesn’t go in there and that’s a given - everyone probably knows that - she does.

It’s like a time capsule in here / yeah because I’m willing to bet time stopped for you when Mr. Miyagi died and didn’t ever flow properly after.

Grief distorts everything it touches and nothing ever works quite the same after, does it.

No matter how much we learn to go through the motions.

Meanwhile he hasn’t dealt with anything really - not his issues from his past or Miyagi’s death. He pushed it down and away from him / the safest thing to do because he needs to be strong for his mother and miyagi and then his family.

But the worst part is he thinks he has dealt with it / and made peace with it - probably convinced himself he was fine, but he wasn’t and hasn’t been.

Probably why cobra Kai returning was so jarring and caused him to do some things he did.

What was it he said to Kumiko?! Felt like I he had no tether and is just spinning with no answers while everyone looks to him to know what to do?

Heavy is the head that wears the crown. There is something very draining about being the one to always bear responsibility and take on that which no one else wants to do. To always be expected to do the right thing while being mocked for it.

The sad thing about Daniel is his suffering is that it isn’t obvious - oh he has the perfect life / loving family (gorgeous wife the two kids) and is successful and as such any problems he has have always been pushed aside.

But the man is hanging by a Thread - literally held together with bits of outdated glue.

And Terry silver comes along and grabs that sting / a string that I swear is connected to his own.

Becasue make no mistake Terry and Daniel are similar in some regards.

Both capable of such violence and anger …… lying restrained under their surface, both just needing the right circumstances (or excuse in Terry’s case) to bust free.

Difference is one uses that violence to do what is right - to right a wrong or vanquish evil - one uses it for fun and to ensure he gets what he wants - a means to his own end.

Their anger is also different - Daniel’s is more quick to burn and fizzles out almost as quickly as it started, and causes him instant regret after. This I believe ties into why he’s so willing to forgive when apologies are given.

Terry’s is like a slow burn - he enjoys it, until he’s tipped too far and then it’s a blazing fire that can’t be put out, consuming himself and anyone in it’s path.

The thing is also, Daniel knows when to stop - when to pull back - when to not let it get to far / Terry not so much.

So two men (similar in some regards but still different in those similarities nonetheless) held together by bits and pieces but to the outside world completely whole and normal; they have it all.

Does Daniel see parts of himself reflected back and doesn’t like it and same for Terry, but in his case does he see what could have been.

Neither would probably like the implications.

Cobra Kai - what it represents, what is did to him, what it is capable of doing - gets under Daniel’s skin but Terry the individual gets under his skin in another totally different way.

Terry comes back and Daniel spirals the worst we’ve seen and it briefly causes him the loss of his family.

Like Amanda said he got in his head in a way she didn’t think was possible.

What he learned under Terry allowed his defeat (finishing off with the first move Miyagi taught him / the roots Miyagi helped him plant are still there and stronger than ever) and we know that although Terry tried to break him / and he brought him to the brink - he never gave in. Didn’t then and didn’t now.

Daniel benefitted from his time under Terry - what it cost him though, was almost everything.

[shardkeeperwip]

I decided to move the opening of Shardkeeper to earlier in the day to better introduce Rebecca and Paige before things hit the fan.

Excerpt under the cut.

My chest tightened and my feet rooted themselves to the dirt below while the other girls moved easily around me. Free choice of partners – so freeing to everyone else – froze me to the spot. Canoeing. It was just canoeing. I could hardly slow anyone down or get in anyone’s way. It was just sitting in a little boat and rowing. I’d wanted to do it a half-hour ago. Now I was sure I was going to mess up.

Sasha hurried past me to play rock-paper-scissors with Alma over who got to pair with Jasmine, the only one in the troop who’d been canoeing before. Other girls gravitated to their best friends or split off from larger gaggles into duos. I scanned the thinning crowd for someone who might offer their hand first. I didn’t want to annoy anyone. I told myself that it wouldn’t matter that I’d never done this before. Almost none of us had. We’d all be equally bad at it.

Some eyes glanced at me and then quickly slid away to other partners just as our gazes met. I’d done it. I’d held still too long and made it weird.

I felt a presence behind me and a light smack on my shoulder. I turned to see Paige Cullen’s freckled face and cheerful brown eyes.

“Come on, Rebecca,” said Paige, smiling brightly. “Don’t just stand there. Let’s pick a canoe and go!”

The tension that paralyzed me in place melted into relief, followed by regret.

“She just follows Paige around everywhere. Like she’s lost.” The whisper overheard at breakfast echoes in my thoughts.

“You’re okay with always doing stuff with me?” I asked before I could stop myself.

Paige raised an eyebrow. “Where’s this coming from?” She cast a fierce gaze around at the other campers as though hoping she’d catch one of them smirking.

“I just… I mean… I’m not holding you back, am I?” I stammered. “In case you want to go with someone else?”

“I’m cool with going with you,” said Paige. “Did you want to go with someone else?”

By now everyone else was partnered up, so I shook my head and followed Paige. Why shouldn’t I always hang out with her? She was my friend, after all. I hesitated to call her a “best friend” because I’ve never really been sure where the mark is for that sort of thing, but we probably counted. She’d introduced herself to me at lunch one day. I was too shy to do more than just answer her questions at first, but now we share our interests and hang out. I don’t know how I’d have ever gotten along if Paige hadn’t made the first move.

Seven canoes set forth on the small lake (really more of a large pond, I thought). It didn’t take long to get the hang of rowing as we worked together to steer. A light breeze and an overcast sky kept us cool while a pair of ducks watched us from the reeds. It was nice. I let myself relax and followed Paige’s commands when she wanted to turn. It seemed silly that I’d been so hesitant earlier. This was fun.

“Your turn,” said Paige. She turned in her seat to face me.

“Huh?”

“To lead. You need to face the other way.”

“Oh. Uh.” I felt my stomach drop as the canoe rocked from side to side when I readjusted. What if I capsized us?

The canoe stabilized and I settled into place. I could see that another canoe had lost a paddle and the girls were pulling it back with the one they still had. They weren’t angry at each other for losing it, just giggling and cheering when they got it in reach.

“I need to be braver,” I muttered.

“Hm?”

I considered pretending I hadn’t said it aloud. That I’d just said ‘Let’s go left’ or something else. But I swallowed and repeated myself, head turned to Paige could hear.

“I need to be braver. I’ve been so worried about messing things up that I’ve been holding myself back. Look, Katie and Amanda can lose a paddle and carry on like nothing happened. I… I think I need to let myself make mistakes. I need to be braver.”

I wanted to scream. I really just said that all out loud, hadn’t I? I looked back at Paige, who put a hand to her chin in thought.

“You know,” she said. “I might just have an idea.”

[adelaidedrubman]

2,9,11,19,28,33 for the writer’s asks?

thank you amanda these were super fun ones!! sorry for the amount of times i bring up riverdale.

2. Anything that you’d like to write but feel like you’re unable to?

the concept i have for telling jenna and faith’s getting together story is something i feel unequipped to write, because i have the idea to do it as an epistolary work of sorts, told primarily through like, jenna’s research notes and possibly faith’s stray letters out to tracey or other folks. but it’s just such a different form of writing than i’m used to and the time it would take to orient myself to that method of storytelling is probably not worth it.

9. Thoughts on cliffhangers.

fine, as long as they aren’t used in a cheap, obviously there just to manufacture tension way. i’ve had plenty “find out next time on dragon ball z” moments myself. basically i think as long as you don’t make it like a riverdale episode you’re fine — if the build up feels like a natural progression of the tension and not just like you threw in a “and prom’s tomorrow!” as a cheap trick to make people hungry for more.

11. Three tropes that are fine but overrated.

soulmate aus soulmate aus soulmate aus. i’m sure there are some compelling, beautiful pieces out there but i’ll never find out. sorry i love divorce and i love love as a free, often stupidly made choice. (unless you count my mary may is the reincarnation of biblical cain and is cosmically linked to johnjess as eternal punishment as she wanders the earth through multiple lifetimes always to encounter them thing as a soulmate au.)

also i think like, “fix it fics” are fine in theory and i enjoy some but so often the effect is just completely draining canon of everything that made it compelling and emotionally engaging in the first place. like we don’t have to jettison everything into children’s cartoon story rules to have an overall happy ending if that’s what you want to change. a lot of what those fics are fixing ain’t actually broke imo. nothing wrong with it if that’s the stakes people want, but i like a little tragedy.

also, love triangles, if i don’t trust the author and know they’ll do something meaningful and fresh with it i’m just completely disinterested. too often they’re just an excuse to put down one character or just throw a lot of toxic jealousy and possessiveness out there for The Drama™ without exploring it as an interesting theme or character flaw.

19. Share a snippet from a wip without giving any context for it.

“No,” she scoffed in repetition. “No way in hell I’m ever coming back here willingly,” she spat. “This is your one get. And I’m not gonna change my clothes either, daddy,” she tacked on with a defiant upward shove of her chin, ensuring, of course, that not one request went without being spitefully disrespected. “I wore this shirt ‘cause I plan on going fishing as soon as I’m done here, in case you didn’t bother gettin’ your mind out of the gutter long enough to read and realize it’s a fishing shirt, and not everything’s about you and your stupid church club.”

“Oh, trust me I read it.”

“Pleasantly surprised to find you’re fucking literate after all. I’ll keep that in mind. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m missin’ the service,” she finally sneered before shoving past him towards the door.

28. Any writing advice that works for you and you feel like sharing?

if you’re stuck on a project, work on something low stakes or whatever happens to scratch your brain the right way to get remotivated, try something that gives writing a renewed novelty or fills the void of whatever you think is missing in your main work. (the johnjess 100k holding hands only marathon is sustained by frequent au smut oneshots.)

and watch riverdale that’s not a joke it legit helps me i will be like “ooooooh my pacing sucks so bad it’s so slow” and “waaah my characterization is so shitty i am a flop at character nuance” and “booooo showing and not telling is stupid i hate showing and not telling” and i will watch riverdale and remember why these things are important and that i’m not completely flopping at them. i cannot stress how important it is to watch riverdale.

33. Give your writing a compliment.

i think i’m really good at threading humor throughout! like, not just the snappy banter, but the subtle ridiculousness of the characters that seeps into everything they do. like the funniest wildfire moments to me are always tiny things you could blink and miss, like the image of jessie scarfing down a bag of communion wafers like chips as she yells about the fucking gas station.

[takeeachdayonebookatatime]

Law and order svu fanfiction

Video killed the pedophile part 10

Liv: pov I told Bri and Elliot how I wanted to get clean and have not showered in 4 days. Bri says he and Fin talked with my Dr about this, says the supplies are in the bathroom so I can get clean. As long as my hair stays dry I can have a nice long bath.

Elliot: pov Brian gets up to fill the tub with water and bubble bath. He goes into her room to grab some pj's out of her drawer, I hear Brian shout I can't believe you still have my old NYPD shirt. Liv says it has too many memories to get rid of it. She also says she kept a few of Ed's after he died to remind her of him. We never got to finish our questions but can finish them another day. As I get up to leave Liv says thanks for hanging out with me detective, as she heads to the bathroom for her bath.

Liv: pov all of my stuff is ready so I can take a bath, I put my hair up and put on the shower cap the Dr gave me. How nice the water is at the right temperature, relaxation music is playing from some speakers. I climb in and let the warm water soothe my aching bones, I let all of my stress leave my body. I can't stop thinking about Elliot and what he did to me. 40 minutes later I hear Brian shout you okay in there, I say just getting out. Once I'm dressed in my pj's I head into the living room to watch a movie.

Brian: pov a few minutes into the movie Liv falls asleep with her head resting on me which is actually kind of cute. I made a light dinner for us. Liv went to bed early, Fin was coming in the morning to stay with Liv, thankfully he could work from home tomorrow since Amanda, Joe and Muncy had the case handled.

:time jump A few days later:

Fin: pov Today is Liv's Dr's appointment in the waiting room, I fill out the forms a nurse handed me. It has important questions about her concussion. Like symptoms And other stuff, I made sure to put that Liv is a former trauma victim. Her name was called and I followed her into the exam room. A male nurse came in to take her vitals. When he put the Stethoscope on her chest he intentionally touched her scars and licked his lips. This guy is bothering me. She has scans before the Dr will see her. The male nurse handed her a gown to put on. He helped her onto the gurney, in the scan room as he is, helping her get comfortable and pointing out the important buttons. I notice his hands grab Liv's pinning them down, I can tell she is starting to freak out. I see him whisper something in her ear. That is when I make a judgment call and barge in shoving the male nurse away. Behind me is the technician who is also concerned, he gets a Dr while I check on Liv who seems very frightened and is hyperventilating for some reason. Thankfully Liv is able to tell me what he said, which is. One move, lights out. I'll do you cold. Why does that sound so familiar to me? Omg he knows, he must have read the file. Once she calmed down a different Dr then the one that treated her at the ER walked into the room to check on her. I asked where the other Dr was. He said family emergency. The guy is at a funeral so I'm filling in.

Liv: pov fin stayed next to me during the whole scan. Back in the other room the neurologist said my scans look good, he said getting my stitches out should not hurt he then proceeded to take out my stitches. The male nurse had been arrested thanks to what he said. I'm lucky the scan room has cameras. I was told in a few days I can go back to work but on light duty. As we are leaving my appointment I notice castle and lanie sitting with Kate in the waiting room, it looks like Kate has a rash on her face. Lanie says with Kate's health issues it's better to play it safe than sorry, and yes it's a rash.

:Time jump a few weeks later:

Fin: pov it has been a few weeks since Liv had her concussion, she was cleared for light duty. Today was a slow day, Joe and Muncy just came back from getting take out for the squad. They both were talking about playing a 20 questions/ never have I ever type game, they asked Amanda if she wanted to join she said fine. In my opinion it's a good way for Captain Benson to learn some stuff about her squad. Me and Liv both said no. Amanda said come on you both probably have a lot of skeletons in your closet this could be interesting. We both agreed since we know all of each other's secrets.

Muncy: pov my first question is ever slept with your partner. Fin says Phoebe was his first partner but we dated years later. Amanda looks very embarrassed and Captain Benson says go on Amanda, Me and Fin both know you were sleeping with nick. Her face turns very red, Amanda says what about you Liv you and detective Stabler ever sleep together. Fin says been waiting 22 years for that to happen. I lost a lot of money on that bet and I still am. Liv says no, but I did sleep with Cassidy one night in 1999, then years later I dated him, Bri is my ex boyfriend. I dated him for about a year a few years ago. We're still good friends. Okay I did not see that coming.

Joe: pov I have one ever do something illegal or against the law. Fin says Liv can answer this one. I'm shocked when she says she illegally ran her DNA through the DNA database looking to see if she had any family members. To be continued. …….

[cycat4077]

My Sonnyshine is finally smiling, truly smiling and happy and that's all I've ever wanted for him 🥺😭

[lebenspurpur]

{slashers x fem reader who has a blood kink? sorry if this is against ur boundaries u don’t have to if ur uncomfy!!!} submitted by anon but I accidentally deleted the original ask because I am an idiot.

Also darling, you're fine, all my boundaries got destroyed years ago.

Warnings: blood (duh), knives, a lot of cutting, mentions of self-harm and necrophilia.

Also a female reader this time.

Michael Myers

Oh Michael loves it.

Blood always gets this man going, I think we've established that.

Wait a second.

You want to cut him? *slowly backs off*

Yeah, he doesn't necessarily trust you with a knife.

Michael doesn't mind the pain, his pain endurance is way too high for that. It's just that cutting him would be a dominant action. And Michael really doesn't want to give you dominance.

He'll let himself get cut if he can cut you.

Michael is all for period sex if that's your thing. Be careful though, he is not going to be soft just because you're sensitive.

Michael just thrives off of the fact that, not only are you shedding blood, you're very sensitive and you're in pain as well.

A pure sadist, this man.

Vincent Sinclair

Blood? Doesn't that involve you getting hurt?

Vincent is skeptical.

He really, really doesn't want you to get hurt.

It would turn you on?

Hm.

Let's test it first.

Vincent will be very slow and careful, stopping as soon as he thinks something's wrong.

You have to reassure him to get going quite a lot.

After he realizes what effect blood has on your body, he overthinks it again and then consents.

He's going to create a new and very special safe word for this, just in case he ever really hurts you.

He himself doesn't really mind getting cut, as long as it makes you happy. This man would do anything for your happiness.

To be quite honest, Vincent loves the marks you leave on him. He looks at them in the mirror the next morning, a bashful grin painting his handsome features. I am so soft for Vincent please.

Period sex? Are you sure you're not in pain during that?

Vincent isn't grossed out by body fluids, but he won't go down on you during your time of the month.

His problem with period sex is that you're already hurting and he doesn't want to cause further harm.

He's perfectly fine with just fingering you and receiving blowjob though he can do without those if you don't want to until you're off your period again.

Vincent would literally do anything for you and I'm not kidding.

Bo Sinclair

"Woah there sugar... didn't think you'd be into that."

He's a bit surprised in the beginning.

Period sex is a no for him, don't even bring it up. He'll probably vomit already at the word period.

Him cutting you is totally fine and he likes that if you're fine with it.

However him getting cut is not going to happen.

To make it up to you, he can fuck you after he just killed a victim.

He'll thrust into you, fresh dark-red splashes of blood painted on his face.

"Do you like that? Knowing that I fucking killed a guy and then immediately came in here to fuck the shit outta you? I bet'cha do sugar."

Lester Sinclair

B-..blood?

Lester is pretty concerned until you explain it a bit better.

After that he's still concerned.

Hmm, how about animal blood?

Lester just doesn't want to be in pain and he doesn't want to put you in pain.

If you're fine with non-human blood then he's very relieved, having been scared that you'll leave him.

Please reassure your feelings for him or he's going to worry for months now.

Baby Firefly

She's a bit astonished in the beginning. She just didn't expect that from you, out of all people.

But, being a part of the Firefly family, she's totally down for it!

She'll gladly pepper you in little cuts and then suck at them. Baby loves using her tongue on you anyway so it's a win-win situation.

She's also very open for period sex. After all, she's done worse than eat someone out during their time of the month.

Baby is the best at aftercare. She'll make you a hot bubble bath, clean the cuts and she got sparkly pink band-aids for the both of you!

Otis Driftwood

Did you just say blood? *drags you to his torture room*

Otis... is so down for this.

Can he.. like carve his name into your body?

Oh and can he take a picture of you?

Can he take a picture of you next to a corpse?

You just wanted to see him bloody, god damnit.

Period sex is not something he'd insist on doing but he'll never say no to fucking you.

Billy Loomis

You want to do what?

Billy has never heard of a blood kink before. It reminds him of his love for the red substance though.

The only difference is that he doesn't use real human blood.

It takes a lot of coaxing but after a while he might be okay with cutting you a little bit..

After seeing how much you enjoy it, he might let you cut him too.. but not too deep!

Billy would also really enjoy fucking you after coming home from a kill. He'd be drenched in blood, the red fluid clinging to his chest and slowly smearing onto your back.

He smirks as he spreads the red fluid on your perky nipples, watching you throw your head back and moan shamelessly.

Stu Macher

Sure, why not?

Stu is an incredibly adventurous person, even when it comes to sex.

You trust him and he trusts you so where's the problem?

I don't think Stu would actively enjoy a blood kink but he's not going to say no since you asked him so nicely.

The pure facts that you're getting so aroused from a simple liquid is enough to make him turn feral anyway.

Who needs blood when you can have Y/N begging on her pretty, little knees for your cock?

Brahms Heelshire

"No."

"But-"

"I said no."

Yeah no, blood scares him.

It will need a lot of coaxing to even get him to try it.

I don't think he'd like it very much.

But Brahms will gladly kill the grocery-boy for you if you'd like to see him drenched in someone's blood.

Thomas Hewitt

Blood? Sweetheart, what if you get hurt?

He'll gently cradle your face in his big palms, searching for sincerity in your eyes.

Upon finding it, he'll nod and ask you to explain it to him again.

He'll try it for you. If you're going out of your way to ask this of him, he has to try it in his opinion.

He doesn't like the act of cutting to get either your or his blood and he'd rather have the blood to be his.

Tommy is a big, strong man. He can take a few small cuts.

But you're his tiny, sweet Y/N, he can't cut you?!

So yeah, to get him to cut you will be quite a quest.

As soon as he sees your reaction to blood, he blushes, desire clouding in his brown eyes.

Maybe this is a good idea after all.

He'd still have you or him covered in animal blood, rather than human blood.

Thomas doesn't care if you're on your period or not, but he'll immediately stop when you're in pain.

Just relax Y/N, he'll go get a towel and then he'll take care of his "little problem".

Josef

Blood? But why?

Okay, for you, he might try.

He enjoys it more than he originally thought.

Blood has an important meaning to him too and to see it spread all over your pretty body.. just does things to him.

Period sex is not his thing.

I don't even think he knows how periods work.

Amanda Young |TW SELF HARM|

Amanda has heard about blood kinks before and you can not change my mind.

She's down to try it if you both feel comfortable.

However, Amanda has had struggles with self-harm in her past and would therefore prefer you getting cut.

She just doesn't like willingly adding new scars to her collection.

There's something so arousing about you licking her bloody fingers clean, she can't help but press her thighs together.

Period sex?

She isn't the biggest fan of that idea but fingering you is not a problem to her.

She's kind of confused since her cramps are too painful to get aroused during her period.

Her aftercare is also very good. Amanda always has bandages and band-aids stacked away somewhere and she knows how to deal with the wounds she's left

[callmeshakespurr]

Hey, if you're requests are open could you do a Rick Flag × Male Villian Reader (fluff) idk something cute where Rick Flag ends up falling in love with Male Reader, and the feeling is mutual. Idk you can fo what you want with it. ❤

Rick Flag x Male Reader

Requested: yes

Category: fluff, just a little bit of angst

Warnings: slight torture (?), i mention a knife like,, once

Note: I haven’t watched Suicide Squad in some time, so this could’ve turned out just the tiniest bit yandere, I hope you don’t mind! Also- I kinda struggled with this cause its my first time writing an actual one shot, but I hope you enjoyed it anyways (:

Tysm for requesting, hope you enjoy it <3

“Where is he?”, Amanda Waller called out as she walked down the hallway, towards the high security room you were currently kept in — Colonal Richard ‘Rick’ Flag not far behind her.

Her call grabbed the attention of the two guards, who stood in front of your cell.

“Is he in there?”, Amanda asked again, approaching the door with fast steps. One of the guards nodded and opened the thick metal door to let the director and the colonel in.

Amanda Waller had tried to get her hands on you for almost five years now, after you first made an apperiance in a club, killing two people. After that, several assassinations followed. Nobody knew who you exactly were, what you looked like, who you worked for; you were like a shadow — what people then came to call you, Shadow.

The major reason of why nobody could get a hold of you even in the slightest bit, was because you always vanished before anybody could even spot you.

After two years of not being able to catch you, the police gave up on further investigation in your cases. Amanda didn’t break so easily though. She wanted you in one of those cells she kept so many freaks in already, and she wasn’t going to give up until she had you sitting behind one of those metal doors, unable to escape her.

After all these years of going after you, she did manage to find out two major things about you. Why you always managed to escape without anyone catching a glimpse of you, and what your weakness was.

All these things led to the present situation.

You sat in a dark room, the only light source being a small lamp, dangling from the ceiling. Your ankles were tightly cuffed to the chair you were sitting on, on your wrists and neck you felt something cold and heavy, which seemed to send small electric shocks through your body every few seconds.

You weren’t sure where you exactly were, since you passed out before they got you. Hell, you didn’t even know who ‘they’ were.

You closed your eyes, trying to concentrate on your thoughts, which was not as easy as you hoped it would be. To say that you were in pain was an understatement. The electricity flowing through your body kept you from thinking straight, and send a wave of pure pain through your limbs with every shock you got.

A female voice ripped you from your trance, and you slowly opened your eyes again, head still hanging low. You knew that voice and you knew that you didn’t stand a chance anymore.

��Your powers won’t work anymore, unless i allow you to use them, so don’t even try.”, that voice belonged to none other than Amanda Waller, probably the only person on this planet you actually feared. You were never scared of what her minions could do to you, no. You were scared of what she could do to you if she ever managed to get you — which almost happened on several occasions.

You clenched your fists, trying to ignore the pain that came over you again, as you frantically tried to somehow sort your thoughts and find a way out of this, but nothing seemed to work. There was no way out of this. There was no escaping this. The feeling of helplessness washed over you, a feeling you didn’t like at all.

“You’re Y/N L/N, you’re a teleporter, thats how you managed to always vanish before the police got to the crime scene”, Amanda spoke, watching you as you sat there on the chair, staring at the ground, unable to move a single muscle. “It took me some time, but i managed to figure out how to block your powers”, she continued, taking slow steps towards you “Teleporters are extremely sensitive to electricity, some mightve even already died due to the constant pain if they were in your place.” She stopped right in front of you, looking down at your slumped figure, the only thing restraining you from falling over being the thick metallic handcuffs that kept your hands tied behind the chair.

Amanda grabbed your chin, forcing you to look up at her. Your sight was blurry and it cost you a lot of strength to even keep your eyes open, but you did manage to make out the silhouette of a rather tall person standing at the entrance of the cell, watching the whole scene, before your focus was back on the woman in front of you. “You’re actually a very pretty boy, Y/N, and very smart too, it’s a shame that you decided to end up like this.”, she said, before letting your face go. “Rick, take him to get the injection, then get his things and introduce him to the team. After that, you can take him to his provided cell.”

The man standing at the door — Rick, you assumed — made his way towards you, as Waller left the room, leaving you to the colonel.

Rick helped you out of the cuffs, that kept you strapped to the chair. Looking at you, he almost felt bad, you looked so drained and helpless. He had never exactly agreed with anything Amanda Waller did, but seeing what just a few hours under her control did with you was another level of not agreeing with something she did.

“Can you stand?”, the colonel asked and you nodded, slowly rising from the chair. Your legs wobbled beneath your weight and you instinctively grabbed onto whats next to you, which just so happened to be Ricks Arm.

After making sure you had gathered enough strength, he began to walk with you towards the door.

time skip

It’s been a little over a week now since they’ve brought you here — you think. Every day was the same. Sitting on the cold floor of your cell, staring at the camera in the corner of your ceiling, some guard bringing you food, you not eating it, some guard taking it away again and reporting everything to someone, more staring at the camera, someone bringing you food again, you not eating it again, the guard taking it away again and reporting everything, all over again, everyday.

The only slightest bit good and entertaining thing was the colonel — Rick Flag, as you learned was his name — checking up on you every now and then when he didn’t have anything better to do. You didn’t quite understand why Rick was making efforts to look after you, just for you to not answer his questions anyways, but you appreciated it. It made everything a little more bearable.

Of course, you were one of the bad guys, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t have a life outside of assassinations.

When you weren’t working for other bad guys, you loved to just sit in your apartment and read, you loved to go onto high buildings and watch over the city. You dreamed of leaving everything behind and exploring the world someday. You worked at your favourite coffee shop, hell you even had a cat. The thought of your only friend being probably already dead or suffering made you sad, but what could you do about it?

Sometimes, you wish you hadn’t picked the path you were on, but looking back at the time you chose to work for the bad guys, you didn’t really have a choice.

Your train of thoughts was interrupted, when you heard the door to your cell open. Hoping it would be Rick, you looked up, your eyes only half open from the lack of strength you had. What you did not expect was to see Amanda Waller standing in front of you, Rick Flag behind her.

“Stand up”, the woman demanded. You listened, as it was of no use to resist her orders. You slowly got up on your feet, which didn’t last long, since you almost immediately fell over, landing painfully hard on your knees. To your suprise, Rick immediately rushed to your side, helping you stand up again.

“I don’t need him on missions like this”, Waller spoke as she watched you lean onto Rick for support. “Take him to the base, the council and I will be waiting there in the meeting room for him.” With that, Waller left again.

The way to the car wasn’t long, but with you almost not being able to stand on you own, let alone walk on your own, it took a little longer, which only fueled your anxiety. The ride to the base was even worse though, since nobody talked and you had five guards sitting around you.

Finally arriving at the door of the meeting room, which was located in the base, the two guards standing in front of it immediately opened the door as soon as they saw the colonel.

The room was quiet at an instance, when you stepped a food inside, Rick following very close behind you — just in case something should happen.

Amanda Waller stood in front of a group of suit wearing men who all sat at one big round table, most likely discussing something. She gestured you to come next to her, to which you complied.

“And who is this now, Director Waller? A new addition to your group of- freaks?”, asked one of the men as he looked you up and down, probably doubting that someone like you could be much of an good asset.

“This, Gentlemen,”, she grabbed your arm and moved you a little forward, making you almost tumble “is Y/N L/N or ‘Shadow’, he was an assassin for almost five years now, working for several other bad guys. Nobody got a hold of him till now due to his teleporting ability. He has over a hundred confirmed kills and not once did anyone ever get near him. I’m using these electric cuffs”, she grabbed your arm again and lifted it up to present the metal cuff, which was secured around your arm “to block his powers, which means he cannot teleport, as long as the electric shocks are on full power. As soon as I turn down the power a little, he can use his power, it is more draining and limited to a certain radius, but it works. I have him under full control and I want him on the team.” Murmurs broke out between the people in the room, as soon as she finished.

“I’m sorry, director, but do you really think it’s a good idea to put another- another misfit on that team? They’re bad guys and will always stay bad guys, and their freaky abilities make them even more dangerous.”, one of the men in suits spoke.

“As I said, I have him under full control, gentlemen. Let me demonstrate.”, Amanda spoke, turning to you, as the people sitting at the table sat back.

Waller took out some kind of remote and tapped on something. First your body tensed due to all the stress and pain you were under at the moment, but as soon as Amanda tapped on the remote, the electric shocks suddenly weren’t as intense as they were before, and your whole body relaxed, your eyes almost watering due to the wave of relief washing over you.

Rick was more than tense while watched the whole situation, only realizing in how much pain you actually were when Waller turned down the intensity of the electric shocks emmitting from the metallic cuffs you were wearing.

Waller looked you in the eyes with a serious expression on her face. “You disobey, you die, got that?” And suddenly you remembered the injection they gave you, when they first brought you here.

Seeing you had no other choice than obeying her, you simply gave her a small nod and looked around the room, taking in every detail. You looked at the small table in front of you, spotting a sharp knife, which you figured was put there by Amanda specifically for you in this exact situation.

With fast movements, you grabbed the knife and teleported to the other side of the room, holding the knife to one of the mens throat. Everyone in the room stiffened even more, and you heard at least three guns clicking.

Looking up, your eyes met Rick’s, before you looked over to Waller, who was already fixated on you. You slowly pressed the knife more against the man’s throat, wanting to see what Waller was going to do. The next electric shock came and you almost yelled out in pain, letting the knife fall, teleporting back to Waller and falling to your knees, clutching the metal around your neck.

Rick wanted to rush to help you, but was quickly held back by Amanda, gesturing him to wait.

“As you can see, I can control his powers however i want to, and should he disobey in any way, or should his powers bolt”, she tilted your head with her finger, than pressed onto the spot on your neck where they injected you, “he dies.”

Still staring at the ground, you swallowed harshly. You’ve never wanted to go back in time and undo all the bad things that happened so badly like in this specific moment. Maybe if you’re parents hadn’t ever found about your ability, you would still be at home, with your family, not here, being tortured by some government lady who wanted to use you as a weapon.

“There’s one more thing. I don’t need him on any mission in this shape. He needs to recover, quickly, and while doing so, I want him under Rick Flags complete supervision. It might cost a little more effort, but think about of how much use he will be for us”, Amanda said, a mischievous expression crossing her face for a few seconds, that going unnoticed by you and pretty much everyone else in the room.

time skip

Three whole months had passed. You’ve been staying with Rick ever since Amanda Waller announced that he had to fully supervise you.

The time you spent with Rick made you feel as if everything wasn’t so bad after all. Occasional talking here and there, Rick cooking something for the both of you every now and then, you almost felt normal again — weren’t there the electric cuffs reminding you of what was real every few minutes.

Over the past three months, your sleep only got worse. You got used to the constant pain by now, but the electricity didn’t only affect you physically, it also messed up your thoughts like hell. Sometimes you didn’t know where up and down was anymore, everything was all over the place inside your mind.

That was also the reason, you were up right now, in the middle of the night, sitting at the big window in your bedroom, looking over the city. You hugged your knees tightly to your chest, and rested you chin on them, letting a few tears slip. You hadn’t cried in a long time, but you were just so exhausted. You were never this close to giving up than right now. Nothing seemed to ever be okay again, you couldn’t do anything but accept your fate.

Being to entangled in your own thoughts, you didn’t hear your bedroom door open.

It didn’t take Rick a long time to spot you in your place at the window. He just came home from a mission that Amanda Waller had wanted you on, but Rick insisted on giving you a little more time to deal with everything.

The tall man closed the door as quietly as he could behind him, which seemed to not be quiet enough, since you jumped slightly at the noise, quickly standing up and turning around. Rick gave you an apologetic look, before slowly walking towards you, “I’m sorry, I should’ve knocked, I just wanted to check up on you and see if you’re alright-“ “It’s fine, I’m fine”, you interrupted him, wiping your tears quickly, taking a deep breath.

Rick frowned, he had never seen you cry before. He cared too much for you and he knew it, he just couldn’t help himself. Stopping in front of you, he looked down at you, only for his eyes to meet yours. For a moment, you both got lost in each others eyes, before you ripped your gaze away, looking to the side.

“Do you want anything else from me?”, you asked shakily, getting a little nervous with his burning stare on you.

“I actually do, yes-“, he hesitated for a moment. You looked up at him with a questioning expression. “Close your eyes”, you complied, closing your eyes slightly, one hand moving to hold onto Rick’s shirt so you didn’t lose your balance. You felt him lean down slightly, till you could fell his warm breath on your cheek. You surpressed a shiver, as he carefully tilted your head.

Now, you didn’t really know what to expect; you and Rick had gotten closer but you weren’t sure, if there were actual romantic feelings, or if he just pitied you, so a kiss wasn’t exactly what you expected. But you definitely would’ve expected it more than what happened next.

A small ‘click’ echoed through the dark room, the next thing you knew was, that all the pain suddenly disappeared. Your eyes watered when you felt Rick’s fingers carefully removing the heavy metallic cuffs around your wrists and neco, pure relief washing over you. Your leaned your body onto Rick’s, unable to support your own weight for a few moments.

When you had finally gained control over your own body again, you moved back a few centimetres and looked up to Rick, who met your confused eyes. “I couldn’t bear to see you in so much pain any longer, so I triedmy best to convince her and I’d say I’m lucky that she trusts me with you.”, the colonel smiled a little, raising a hand to softly carress your cheek. Your eyes widened. He quickly removed his hand again and apologized, “I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.”

Rick took a step back, still being careful so you didn’t lose balance again, “I should go, and you should sleep, you need to be well rested and-“

You were fast to interrupt him by taking a quick step towards him, getting a little on your tiptoes, before pressing a small kiss to Rick’s lips. You carefully looked him in the eyes again, “I don’t know either, but it just felt like the right thing to do.”

It took the man a few seconds to process what just happened, but when he did, he was quick to kiss you again, his soft lips over yours, moving slowly, as you kissed back. He put his hands on your waist, while you locked yours behind his neck. You kissed for a few moments, before the both of you had to breathe again. “Thank you”, you whispered against Rick’s lips, before receiving another small peck. “Sleep with me tonight?”, he asked quietly, getting lost in your eyes again. You gave him a small nod, allowing him to pick you up and carry you to his room, both of you smiling as you fell onto the mattress.

[australiancarisi]

Olivia Benson ~ Let Me Take Care of You

Sometimes you just gotta take care of your girl Based on this song Words: 1139

You huffed as you got to the floor of your building silently plotting the death of whoever broke the elevator. For the amount of time you spend running after an extremely active 10-year-old boy, you’d think you’d have just a little bit more fitness.

Speaking of an extremely active 10-year-old boy, you grinned as you could hear him running around the apartment from all the way down the hallway. How the neighbours put up with the noise you never knew, although it probably did have something to do with being married to a police captain.

“y/n!” Noah cheered as you walked through the door

“Noah!” you cheered back with a giggle, playing your stuff on the entry table before turning to your sitter “Hey Lucy”

“Hey y/n” she smiled from the table. The two of you easily fell into conversation about your days, Noah, Lucy’s boyfriend and university.

“I can’t tell if I need a night out or to lock myself away from literally everyone” she laughed

“Well, I think you should treat yourself, grab some take out on your way-“ you were cut off by your phone. You lifted it to see it was a message from Fin.

“Everything okay?” Lucy asked

“It’s Fin he wanted to see if I was home yet, the case they have seems to be taking a toll on Liv” you sighed. You and Fin had a pretty good system going, he kept you in the loop and kept an eye over Liv at work and you made sure that whenever you stopped by the squad room you’d bring him some sort of treat from the bakery down the road.

“Go I’ll stay here with Noah” Lucy smiled

“No Luce, I can’t ask you to stay longer you already do too much”

“Y/n if you don’t go in the next minute I’ll push you out the door myself. Besides, I owe Noah some ninja turtle time” she smiled and ruffled Noah’s hair who had at some point made it next to her.

“You are a godsend, Lucy, I owe you one” You smile, At this point, it’s more like owe her eleven. You grabbed just your keys and phone and quickly headed out the door and down to the precinct.

“You all look terrible” you smiled as you walked into the silent squad room. It was empty except for Fin, Amanda and Kat - all the uni’s having left for the day. They all lifted their heads and smiled at you. “Please

tell me you guys are done for the day?”

“We are we were just waiting for you” Amanda said standing up to gather her things together.

“Bad?” you asked handing Fin a box of assorted baked goods. He smiled and thanked you, taking it happily.

“yeah… It’s been pretty full-on with this case and then this morning we found the 10-year-old boy dead in the park-“ you held your hand up to Kat to stop her, you didn’t need to hear anymore. You didn’t want to hear anymore.

“She’s been held up in her office most of the day, she’s admitted on getting justice. I haven’t seen her eat more than a bag of chips from the vending machine and like five coffees” Fin said

“Thanks for telling me” you knew Liv wouldn’t tell you. She tried very hard to keep you and Noah away from all of this.

“I know I don’t have to say it but take care of her” Fin patted your back.

“Always. Get out of here guys, go get some rest” you waved them goodbye and headed to Liv’s office. With a soft knock, you opened the door to see your wife, her jacket thrown off on the couch, her hair slightly tousled but nothing crazy, glasses on and head staring down jumping between her laptop and the case to her left.

“Fin I already told you guys to head out, I’ll be another 20 minutes I promise” Liv said not looking up.

“How many times have I heard that” you teased lightly. Liv’s head shot up at the sound of your voice. You could see just how truly tired and run down she was. The only positive being that you noticed a small bit of tension leaving her shoulders as she realised it was you and not her Sargent.

“y/n-“

“Now what’s this I hear about you only eating chips and coffee for the day?” You slowly closed the door for privacy, even though there was no one around. “How many times do I have to tell you? Coffee-“

“-is not a meal” she said along with you. Ever so gently and quietly you rounded her desk to her. Without hesitation Liv pushed back slightly in her chair and pulled you into her lap, wrapping her arms around your waist and you putting an arm around her shoulder.

“Let me guess…Fin?” she mumbled while she nuzzled into your neck.

“Yeah, Fin” you whispered. A silence fell over the office as you began running your finger of the hand around her shoulder through her hair while your other held onto her arms.

“He shouldn’t have called you, you should be at home relaxing” Liv sighed

“Well, technically he texted” you joked, getting a small laugh out of her. “You should be home too” your tone changing to be more serious “Any way you know I truly can’t relax when you’re not home, I worry”

“You worry” Liv nodded pressing a kiss to your shoulder. Your head turned slightly, your eyes falling to the file. Liv quickly flicked it shut, not for privacy but to protect you from what she sees every day.

“Come, home time” you mumbled into her hair as you felt Liv’s arms tighten around you. The two of you sat there in silence, the only noise coming from the street outside. You felt Liv’s breathing slow down as she relaxed for what was probably the first time since waking up that morning.

“I have so much to do though” Liv said, her eyes darting to all the paperwork spread over her desk.

“Hey” you put your fingers under her chin and made her look at you “you take care of everyone else. You are always thinking about a victim or your squad or me and Noah, and I love that about you but you need to allow me to help you. You are always the first one to take care of me at my worst now it’s my turn” you pecked her lips “let me take care of you. Let me take you home and give you something to eat and snuggle with our boy. You always wanna take care of us? You can’t do that if you don’t take care of yourself first”

“I love you” Liv smiled “Let’s go home sweetheart”

[brokenbutnotquiting]

Say My Name

A Nace Oneshot where Nancy *really* loves the way Ace calls her name. (Because Alex Saxon makes it sound so damn enticing that I couldn't help myself)

I had always liked my name. Nancy Drew. Not so much Drew anymore, but it sounds better than Nancy Hudson. Or maybe that was just my habits talking.

In any case, I like my name. Nancy.

With the ever-growing confusion regarding my last name, it suited me better to opt for – what I call – the Ace option. Just casually dropping my last name until and unless it's an official or legal requirement.

For the very common folk of Horseshoe Bay, I am Nancy.

Just Nancy.

It was only after I realized and accepted my intense feelings for my best male friend – my partner-in-investigative-work – Ace, I often found my heart skipping a beat at my own name.

Purely because of the way he called it. Nancy. With that adorable lilt at the second 'n'. He probably never even realized that he did it, which made it all the more enticing.

But I would never tell him that.

__________

I ignored the screaming soles of my feet as I locked up the Claw. It was date night for George and Nick, and despite my best hopes, I was the one left in charge of closing up the seafood restaurant.

How had I ended up here tonight, I wondered sarcastically before a face flashed in my mind.

Ace.

How was it that most of my stupid impulsive decisions nowadays were because of him? 

He had opted to lock up for the night, claiming to be happy to do it only if George allowed Amanda to stay with him.

"We haven't seen each other much since we returned from our road trip, and she has been asking me if we could just talk for a while without either of us running off for something or the other," he had said with a shrug.

Now, normally I am not a goody-two-shoes. Or a masochist. But seeing Ace with that utterly adorable little pout made my heart melt, and I jumped in to sacrifice my sanity to let him leave early. To be with his girlfriend, no less. 

What can I say? Sometimes, I am just that much of an idiot.

Bess had side-eyed me so hard when I chimed in, I wondered how transparent I had become regarding my feelings for Ace. How did no one else notice?

But then, maybe everybody had noticed it at some point in time and had chosen not to comment on it.

Everybody except Ace. A sigh heaved out of me at that particular thought.

Ace was blissfully unaware. And thank God for that. I didn't need him to hate me for ruining his chances with Amanda. As much as I had rolled my eyes at his dopey smile that first time he had accepted his crush on her—almost endangering George in the process—I did want him to be happy, even if it wasn't with me.

Even if watching him fall for her tore my heart out every time, I thought about it.

Even if I was wrecking myself over him. Every. Damn. Day.

I looked around aimlessly. I only had to mop the floors one last time, and then I could leave. So I got the mop and the bucket— put on some music, and let my mind daydream about a life where I wasn't the girl one-sidedly crushing on her best friend as I let my body move on autopilot.

I didn't even realize that I wasn't alone until I felt the hair on the back of my neck rise, pulling me out of the daydream just before I got kissed.

I whirled around towards the door leading to the locker room to find him standing there.

Ace.

He looked angry. Really angry. 

"Ace? What are you doing here? What's wrong?" I asked worriedly. Was someone in danger? Was there an accident or something?

"What's wrong is that I cannot fucking stop thinking about you," he snapped, his soft blue eyes flashing with barely concealed anger.

"What – what are you on about?" I stuttered with surprise.

His nostrils flared delicately. "There I was, with my girlfriend, finally spending some much-needed time together, and my mind kept reminding me that she is not you. That you are you. And that you are here. And I was so distracted by the thought of you being here alone with no one to protect you, should something happen, that I completely missed her telling me that she loved me."

He strode over to where I was standing, grasping onto the mop as if my life depended on it. The weight of his words, the complete and utter disaster of it all hit me at the same time he stopped barely half a foot away.

"Ace— ” I started and stopped. What was I supposed to say? Was there anything I could say that would help? Anything at all? It didn't seem so.

"There she was, looking all hopeful as she told me she loved me, and all I could think of was whether you were safe. Whether I would see you tomorrow." His voice held an undercurrent of fear. And I understood that.

After the Aglaeca and the Wraith and Everett Hudson and the threat of the Road Back still lingering, all of us felt overprotective of each other.

"I am not a marshmallow, Ace. I can take care of myself. At the very least, not drop dead while locking up the Claw," I joked half-heartedly. I admit that I might have intentionally ignored the part where he said he barely paid attention to his girlfriend. Or how my heart skipped several beats at it. I didn't need him more antagonized over my feelings for him.

"That's not the point, and you know it," he snapped. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes, before he continued, "my girlfriend told me she loved me, and not only was I distracted enough to miss it, I couldn't even say it back."

He shook his head, eyes still closed, as if he could somehow forget everything that happened. I understood that feeling as well. Sometimes, I wished the same.

"Why?"I asked him softly because I knew that was the part he wanted me to stress on. I knew him well enough to know his cues. I could play along.

He opened his eyes at my question.

"Because, as much as I like Amanda, I don't love her. At least not as she wanted me to. I tried, God knows I tried so damn hard, but I just couldn't," he explained.

I didn't ask him the question on the tip of my tongue again. I merely kept staring at him. Ace knew my cues as well as I did his. If he wanted me to play along, he could as well.

Why? 

"She broke up with me, rightly so. She deserves someone who isn't already in love with someone else," he whispered, just loud enough to be heard over the music, "what kind of a pathetic person does that?"

Even then, my heart beating fast enough to rival that of a marathon runner, I stayed silent.

"Nancy." He whispered almost pleading, for what I didn't know.

"I love the way you say my name, "I whispered back as if in a thrall. Completely inappropriate? Perhaps. But a kernel of truth nonetheless.

He raised his hands, cupping my face so softly as if afraid that I would break under his touch. He touched his forehead to mine, his eyes closed again.

A slight tremble shook me at his touch. His breath ghosted over my face. "Say my name again," I whispered to him.

"Nancy."

He shifted his face a tiny bit and kissed my cheek. I closed my eyes at the onslaught of feelings his adoration elicited.

"Nancy," he whispered before kissing my other cheek.

"Nancy."

A kiss on my chin.

"Nancy."

A kiss on my forehead.

"Nancy." 

A kiss on my brows.

"Nancy."

A kiss on one eye, and then the other.

"Nancy." 

A kiss on my nose.

"Nancy," his voice took on an almost worshipping quality as he whispered my name but didn't lower his mouth to mine.

Tell him, I chided myself. Tell him that he isn't wrong in his feelings for you. Tell him that if he felt condemned about his feelings for you, then you shared the damnation with him.

"I love you, Ace," I said, tears escaping me, my throat raw with emotion, "I have loved you for a while now." 

There was so much I wanted to tell him and couldn't. So much he needed to know. Another day, I reasoned with myself. I would tell him another day when we were both far more clear-headed than we were at the moment.

"I know, Nancy," he said softly, nodding his head, "I love you too."

And then he closed the gap between us.

His lips were soft against mine. Unhurried. Moving with a languid assurance that he knew what he wanted and wasn't afraid to claim it any longer. I played along with him, slow and steady, our form of normalcy until the heat growing in my body took over.

The kiss turned frantic as soon as I bit on his lower lip. His tongue was in my mouth, claiming me. He wanted everything, and I wanted to give it all to him. My tongue followed his, teasing him to a sensual dance of their own.

His hands, which were previously cupping my face, slid lower until one of them was grasping onto my neck – positioning my head as he wanted – the other grabbing onto my waist, pulling my body closer to his.

I let go of the mop, and it fell on the floor with a clang. I placed my hands on his chest. His heartbeat was strong and steady, if not galloping at a faster pace, under my fingertips. I moved my hands on his body, feeling his muscles flex subtly until one of my hands took a life of its own and decidedly wandered over to his hair, tugging on it as if he could come closer than he already was.

I don't particularly know how long we stayed like that, devouring each other like the last meal, but when we did eventually come up for air, I knew I wouldn't be able to let him go, and I told him as such.

His chuckle was like music to me. I opened my eyes just in time to see his smirk, "after a kiss like that, I should hope not, Nancy."

"Jesus Christ, Ace," I swore, "the way you say my name is my favorite thing."

His used laugh vibrated through me at that, warming my core but you know what? I didn't care.

"That's all?" Ace asked me playfully. No more stoicism. It was almost as if he had pulled back another layer of his surprisingly dazzling personality. I smiled at him in answer.

His answering grin almost knocked me right out. Damn! I really did love this man.

I didn't know what my face showed him, but the grin dropped off his face as he asked, "what's wrong?"

Ah. I must have been emoting the pent-up sadness I had repressed for so long.

I shook my head at him, smiling again. I combed through his hair with my fingers and let all of my affection pour into my voice as I said, "I didn't think I would ever get to do this again."

"Touch my hair?" Ace asked amused, quirking an eyebrow.

"Just be with you. Touch you without having to worry about offending anyone," I explained.

He placed a soft kiss on my forehead, pulling me into a hug, "You never really had any sense of personal space when it came to being near me, Nancy. That was just so you, I never really questioned it further. I was so scared of you putting up defenses against me that I purposefully ignored all the signs. Even when they were glaringly obvious." 

He kissed my cheek and said, "I shouldn't have tried as hard as I did to deny my feelings creeping up on me for over a month. And I definitely shouldn't have chosen the easier way out with Amanda."

I shook my head at that. "You did what you thought was right for you," I said, somewhat sadly, "I remember your smile. You told us that she made you bloom."

"She did. For a while."He said. There was a trace of sadness in his voice. It would take time, I knew, for him to stop blaming himself for everything that happened with her.

"Take your time before you move on, Ace. Both of you deserve that respect," I told him.

"I will," he said, a small smile gracing his lips again, "but not tonight." I nodded my acceptance of his decision. Whatever he needed.

"Nancy," he whispered my name in my ear a heartbeat later.

The groan that escaped me was obscene, and I rightfully snapped, "Stop saying my name like that, Ace, if you want to keep your clothes on."

His answering kiss made my blood heat up and my toes curl in my shoes in an instant. I kissed him back with equal fervor. His hands started roaming, and I gasped into his mouth as he cupped my ass. He chuckled in response. A challenge.

Very well, I thought to myself. I dropped my mouth, kissing his neck softly before biting on it. An obscene groan escaped him. I smirked.

Two can play this game, Ace. And I barely got started.

I licked the spot I had bitten.

"I won't be able to even see straight if you keep doing this," his warning rang. I ignored the moan accompanying the statement.

I took half a step away from him and said playfully, "You need some space, Ace?"

"Nancy," he almost growled before yanking my body flush against his again and dropping a searing kiss on my lips.

Dear God, in the heavens above! I loved the way he said my name.

Nancy.

[paper-cuts-and-fresh-bruises]

So once again I’ve taken my time to collect my thoughts because wow, I am all in the feels right now (warning, long post). First things first, I am so oddly HAPPY that they didn’t give us a Nancy and Ace kiss, because beforehand yes I was wanting it and by all means I still do, but it made so much more sense with how everything played out. Plus, the proximity Nace had in the dreamscape was immaculate, and when dreamscape Ace said “knock ‘em dead”, oh lord that knocked me dead for a good minute. Plus, we’re in it for the slow burn, and part of that is letting it unfold naturally and gradually, not forced by circumstance or manufactured; make no mistake, the writers are invested in giving us everything we could want and more, but they know how to do it without falling in too deep into the rabbit hole, they have to take clarity in real time, we can only do that after the fact. I personally find that for once the writers know me better than I do, I’ve thrown out theories (some I’ve shared on here and some not) that I’ve had into the void with varying levels of accuracy, from none, to partial, to spot on (this last one being more rare personally). And honestly, I’m actually quite comforted at the moment with my trust in what the writers will do just in general, but obviously especially with Nace. For now I’m living on Kennedy’s words “just let it ride baby”. Plus, season 3 is the place to be for it to flow naturally like a river, give us that progression and have it happen.

Another Nancy x Ace feature I loved was Ace’s tendency to be more touchy (literally) and drawn to Nancy in the finale, because although make no mistake Ace has had numerous moments through the season in terms of his journey towards Nancy, Nancy has definitely been a bit more loud on that side of things although it does make total sense for the both of them. Nancy’s near death experience was definitely a catalyst in the journey for Ace to acknowledge those feelings, I mean the eye contact when Nancy woke up was astoundingly loud. Also, going back a bit for a second, aside from the fact I am so glad that Nancy dumped the dumpster fire that is Gil, I am also so giddy at what Ace said to Nancy because it was so sweet but I also adore his clear affirmation to Nancy that she can do it and that her breaking up with Gil was all her, she has the strength and as can be seen she proved that. Also quick note, aside from the back rubs and hand holding, his concern when the blood was draining, MY HEART. On top of that his “I feel like I left something behind” is giving me everything, and btw I can give you an eye witness description Ace, plus any additional info if you’d like. Coupled with Nancy’s speech she was rehearsing at his door, the girl has it bad for our boy, he just needs to gain clarity in return.

Other things I want to mention, I know we kind of talk about who Nancy’s gonna be with next but I’m gonna throw it out there and say no one, at least not until Ace comes along, at which point they play the game of awkward interactions and figure things out. The Nancy we’ve known up to this point has jumped from guy to guy, but we understand at this point that that’s down to her avoiding her trauma, which she’s now not only in charge of but has to face head on, which means not diving into just any guy’s arms, she understands at this point that it’s not healthy and it’s not helpful. As a result, I think she’s gonna fuel her time with other things; this will obviously include investigating, but maybe even hanging out at Ace’s house whilst he’s on the “romantic” trip (also I really don’t like Amanda defending Gil, I can understand defending family to a certain degree, but girl “he got dumped for no reason” is complete bs, did you even ask or just assume? Ace is right about all he said, and as someone with a brother myself I’ll say it doesn’t take having a sibling to know that, you didn’t even acknowledge Gil’s toxic behaviour properly when Ace called you back). I feel like even though Ace encouraged the trip that he’s already not feeling it, because his feelings are elsewhere *hint hint* right now, it’s more of an excuse to run from what (or who) he’s feeling different about, but when he returns we’re gonna get a lot of juicy content (I don’t think they’ll waste much time doing this for season 3). 

The episode really went there, addressing a lot but not making it feel rushed. Which whilst we’re on the subject, aside from Nancy’s whole ordeal, it’ll be interesting to see if maybe there’s a solution for finding a way to separate George and Odette (I’ve had this theory in my head that Temperance might be the devil they have to make a deal with), though if they do I want it to be a case of Odette being freed and her moving on, because Bess deserves to find someone (as they hinted in the interview for the finale) and not just be dragged back because whilst it was cute for a bit, the whole Odette thing was definitely messy regardless of her noble choice to not resurface again, but also give George her life back where she isn’t having to rush milestones and Bess can get the screen time (which btw I think they deliberately scaled her back this season to serve the other plots better so that they could do more for her in season 3, to give the writers credit where it’s due). Another thing, from the interview as far as the Bobbsey’s are concerned, as far as I know they’ll be taking a backseat, which has me intrigued as to how they’ll be used if they do turn up. On top of that, I loved the reference to Nancy and Ace’s feelings as “nothing casual” which leads me to the last bit of this long post (I will likely make more posts but I’m trying to control myself).

For the longest time I’ve shipped Nancy and Ace, like day 1 type stuff. And part of me just thought it was my brain working overtime and wanting it to be that way, especially when season 2 rolled around and we got all this CONTENT. It could’ve been the writers just latching onto us. But as it turns out I and the rest of us Nace shippers have been right in what our eyes saw this the entire time. They looked at Ace (Alex Saxon) as a love interest for Nancy (Kennedy Mcmann) the moment they had him cast. It’s such great validation because in season 1 amongst other scenes, especially when they went to the library and there was that look between them when they read the emails, I was like...am I? are you seeing this? the seeds were being planted. Anyways, that’s all that’s on my brain right now (surprise surprise), nevertheless I can’t wait for what’s next overall, but obviously I and the rest of us will have to. Luckily though it’s not a whole year we have to wait so we are truly blessed. Looking forward to what’s in store.

[onceuponamirror]

flutter

consequences? of her actions? it’s more likely than you think. nace oneshot, post 2x12, speculative fight and feelings. [read on ao3]

She wakes up disoriented. Her brain adjusts to her surroundings—creaky bed, filtered natural light streaming through plastic curtain panes, and faint smells, all mixing awkwardly with the dull neon sign over Gil’s bed.

Gil’s bed. Right. Now she remembers finding herself outside the Bobbseys’ at midnight, unable to stop herself. It feels like Nick all over again, when she buried her feelings in someone else and begged for a distraction from her own brain. But she keeps seeing Ace on that ledge when she closes her eyes, and can’t bring herself to let the thoughts linger.

The bed is empty, cool to the touch where another body should be. He’s been up for a while then, she thinks. Nancy sits up, straining her eyes against the morning light. Gently, an aroma of coffee and eggs wafts into Gil’s room, and she smiles, realizing he must’ve gotten up to make breakfast.

She pulls on her jeans and boots. Gil hadn’t seemed the type to cook a girl breakfast after a booty call, but maybe she’d misjudged him. She drapes her jacket over her arm and follows her nose to the kitchen.

“That smells gr—oh.” Abruptly, Nancy cuts herself off. It’s not Gil by the stove, but Amanda, who also quickly falls silent halfway through a laugh. At the counter, in his lucky pullover and an unbuttoned flamingo shirt, is Ace, who visibly straightens in his seat when he sees her.

“Uh.” Nancy finishes pulling on her jacket, adjusting her hair around the collar. Her neck feels very hot as she puts the pieces of the scenario together. The three of them, all before 8 am, all at the Bobbseys’s. She flashes Amanda an awkward finger gun. “You’re not Gil.”

Amanda smiles back at her sympathetically. “Sorry,” she replies. She glances down at the eggs sizzling quietly in the pan, and then back to Ace. “But I make a much meaner omelet than him anyway. Want one?”

For a long moment, Nancy just stares back at her. Red alarm sirens are ringing in her thoughts, but she’s still settling with the fact that both she and Ace seemingly slept here. “Is…Gil…here?”

“No. He left, about twenty minutes ago,” Ace says, his voice low. Nancy wonders if he always sounds this grumpy in the morning. “Forgot to mention you were here, though.”

Nancy blinks. “He left? Like—left? Is he coming back?”

Amanda turns off the stove and faces her. “He said he got a freelance gig that he couldn’t pass up. Kind of left in a hurry.” With a slight grimace, Amanda sighs. “Nancy, Gil can be…easily distracted. It makes him forgetful, you know? Of his manners, mostly. He doesn’t mean to be.”

Nodding distractedly, Nancy runs her tongue along her teeth. Of course he runs out the day he was supposed to help her out. After a long moment of Amanda and Ace watching her, he clears his throat. “Why? Did you need him or something?”

Ace’s tone is uncharacteristically harsh, and both she and Amanda turn to look at him. After another awkward beat, Nancy says, “Um. Well, he was supposed to help me run a boat over to this beach for the case I’m working on. It’s kind of…a two man job.”

He looks annoyed, but Amanda just smiles at her. “Well, we can help. Right, Ace? It could be fun. I’ve always wanted to go on one of your mystery adventures with you and Nancy,” she adds. Ace glances between the two of them, looking uncomfortable, but finally nods.

“Sure,” he says slowly, rolling his shoulders. “Yeah, we can help.”

“Great,” Amanda says cheerily, and plops the eggs she was cooking onto two plates. “Well, I’m gonna just take a quick shower. You two have these and then we can go!”

She disappears into the back of the trailer, and a few moments later, the sound of running water filters across the room. By the time Nancy glances back at Ace, he’s nearly finished eating the eggs before him, almost as if stuffing his face will keep him from talking to her.

Nancy takes a small bite of the eggs, chewing as painfully slow as she can. “This is good, actually. Maybe Amanda wants Grant’s old job. We still kinda need a line cook.” At the mention of his brother, Ace finally meets her eye. He doesn’t say anything, though—but she notes that he hasn’t left either. Attempting to fill the awkward silence, Nancy pushes on. “You know, I think this is the longest time you’ve been in a room with me since he left.”

“Yeah,” Ace sighs, and averts her look. “I’ve been busy.”

“Really?” She replies, skeptically. “Because it kind of seems like you’ve been avoiding me. Like, I don’t know, you’re mad at me?”

He glances at her again, like he’s considering his words. “Maybe I am.”

Nancy puts down her fork. She’d known this was coming, and hoped it wasn’t. Her hands slide over her face. “I know, I know, this is about the list of names. But…it was an emergency, Ace. I didn’t know what else to do. I couldn’t let you—” She drops her hands from her eyes. “And—and anyway, I fixed it!”

“Yeah, you fixed it with Celia Hudson,” Ace replies curtly, getting to his feet. His voice rises. “You traded the list for letting a murderer get away with killing 12 people on that ship. You didn’t fix anything, Nancy, you just moved it to another place! You made me responsible for you doing—for those 12 lives instead!” 

For a moment, chest heaving, she stares at him. “No,” she says finally, finding a level in her tone. “I made me responsible for the Bonny Scot. Not you. And I will find another way to bring Everett to justice, okay? There’s always another wa—”

“What if there isn’t, Nancy?” He shakes his head, pacing towards her. “Not everything is a puzzle you can just solve, okay? What if he gets away with this and hurts someone else? We know he will. And you’ll get pulled in deeper with the Hudsons. And when that happens—that’s—that’s on me.”

“Then it’s my burden, Ace!” They’re practically shouting now. Dimly, she hopes Amanda can’t hear this through the shower. “You’re right, Ace, okay, I did trade your life for the witnesses and then I traded the witnesses for the Bonny Scot.I made a necessary calculation in a crappy situation. But I did it, not you!”

“For me!” He yells back. She’s not sure she’s ever heard his voice this loud; she wasn’t sure his vocal cords could physically reach this decibel. He exhales, deflating and running his hands through his hair. “It was… a total Slytherin move, Nancy. Okay? Just…admit you didn’t think it through.”

She scoffs, throwing her head back. “Well, that’s rich.”

Hands on his hips, he glowers at her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“How many federal databases have you hacked into by now, Ace?” She exclaims, throwing her arms out. “I think I stopped counting after you broke my dad out of prison!”

“That was different,” he mumbles. “That was an—”

“Emergency,” she finishes flatly, raising her eyebrows.

Ace purses his lips, and he finally seems somewhat calmed. “Your dad’s life was in imminent danger. I didn’t risk anyone else in the process. But I told you, Nance, at the paper mill. I told you I didn’t want to be responsible for anyone else’s life. ”

“Well, I was responsible for yours,” she replies softly, defeated. He stares at her, chest heaving. “And…I told you, I couldn’t lose you.”

He still doesn’t say anything, but a look passes between them. Her heart flutters so madly against her ribcage she’s afraid he might hear it. She’s reminded of that night after the wraith in the woods, when he’d told her something very similar. He didn’t want to lose her, then. She wonders if he’s thinking the same.

There’s a long moment of silence.

Finally, she nods, and her hand finds itself home on his arm. “I’m sorry I made you feel responsible for the Bonny Scot, Ace, I really am. But…even if you’re right, and I can’t find another solution, then…it’s still my fault. Not yours. It’s my problem, my burden, okay? Please, Ace. I can’t have you mad at me. I can’t…focus when you are. I need you on my team.”

When she meets his eye again, his expression has softened. She can tell the fight has gone out of him. Eyebrows knitted, he says, “No.” Her face falls, but then he continues. “I’m a Hero of Horseshoe Bay too, you know. You shouldn’t have to shoulder it all alone.”

“Yeah, well,” she says, before she can plan otherwise, and steps back from him. She lets out a self-deprecating sound from the back of her throat, thinking of how Gil abandoned her the night after her promised to help. She thinks of Owen Marvin, dead because of her. She thinks of Nick, who was right to have ended things with her. Finally, and bitterly, her thoughts jump to how happy Amanda and Ace had seemed before she walked in. “I’m used to alone.”

His face crumples and he opens his mouth, but whatever Ace is about to say, she’ll never know. Amanda has emerged from the back of the trailer, toweling off her damp hair and already dressed. “Okay, I’m ready,” Amanda says, striding towards them. She pulls to a stop after a moment, having picked up on the strange energy lingering in her kitchen.

Ace is still looking at her with an expression she can’t—won’t—name. If she had to try, it might be pity, or a kinder version of it. She inexplicably feels like crying, but swallows it, unwilling to feel weak in front of Ace’s girlfriend.

“Everything okay?” Amanda asks gently, and Nancy can’t help but think, that’s why Ace likes her. She’s sweet. Her heart squeezes again. Don’t think about it.

Exhaling, Ace nods at Amanda, and then back to Nancy. “Yeah. We’re okay.”

She hopes it’s true.

[navalcriminalimagines]

Backup

Request by @wow-life-love4 ❤️ : So I was hoping to request a Barba x reader; Where the reader sees Barbra back when she goes visits Carisi and she has those feeling again what she had years ago when he left!And he finally accepts the fact that she was the one as well!!!!!(Throw some angst in there I’m dying for it with fluffy ending)

Words: 3,530

Tags: @crying-river

Sorry for the typos. Enjoy. ❤️

Based on 22x04 Sightless in a Savage Land. (Of course)

(Gif isn’t mine)

*Carisi’s office*

Since Sonny got his new office, you found a comfy place on the floor, against his furniture. That’s where you were even though your former partner wasn’t there yet. There was this new case that came up in the night before, he had a few meetings while you were working on your laptop, coffee right next you and Sonny’s on his desk.

He came in a few minutes later, smiled when he saw you. He threw the box he was holding on his cabinet and sat on his desk chair. When he spotted his coffee, his smile grew wider. “You’re the best,” he said, taking a big sip.

“I know,” you smiled. “How’s the case going?”

“I’m going for murder 2, and we’ll see,” he shrugged.

One thing you love about your friendship with Sonny Carisi is that silence is comfortable. There is no awkward silence. While he worked on his paperwork, you were on your laptop. Shopping online, actually. You rescued a car a year ago and the little ball of fur has been scratching on your couch ever since. It was completely destroyed now and you needed a new one.

“Dom,” you called your best friend. “What do you think about this one?” you turned your laptop so Sonny could see it. It was a nice three places blue couch, Scandinavian style.

Sonny wheeled closer to you and bent down to look at it. “I won’t fit in that one,” he said. He’s been crashing a lot at your place for the past two years.

“Stupid long legs,” you teased him. “Although, in 4 years, you’ll be sleeping in my bed, so—“ you turned the screen back at you and kept scrolling.

Sonny laughed at that. “Only if neither of us is married,” he reminded you.

“Doesn’t look good, Dominick. I’m telling you,” you exclaimed. “You seriously need to prepare yourself to spend the rest of your life with me,”

“Wouldn’t have agreed if I wasn’t. Although, that’s not the story I wanna tell our kids,” still laying in his chair, Sonny was facing you, his legs spread as always.

“Why not?” You exclaimed. “It’s cute! Two best friends that made a deal to get together to avoid forever loneliness!” You paused and realized what he said. “Wait—kidS?” you asked, making sure the ‘s’ was heard.

“At least, four, Y/N. You know I want a big family,” Sonny told. This conversation seemed like completely normal between although it wasn’t.

“Then pry I’ll give birth to quadruplets. Cause I’m not getting pregnant four times,”

“Don’t underestimate the Carisi’s power,”

You and Sonny stopped talking for a moment, just staring at each other, until you both started to laugh. “This conversation is nonsense,” you said.

“I agree,” you heard from the doorway. You and Sonny turned like one man, to look at the man standing there. You didn’t have to look at him though. You recognized his voice from the first sound.

“Barba,” Sonny was the first to greet him. He stood up and offered his hand. Both men shook hands and Rafael’s eyes stopped on you, still sitting on the floor. You looked up to him and tried to keep a poker face. But god, he looked more handsome as ever. The beard. You asked him multiple times to keep the beard, when you and Rafael were seeing each other.

“Detective,” he greeted you.

“Counselor,” you quickly said and got your attention back on your laptop. You can’t let him see you still have feelings. And that you’re mad. Hurt, even. Rafael never made a promise to you, you two weren’t actually dating per say, but you wished he gave you a goodbye. Not just—leaving.

“What can I help you with?” Sonny rescued you.

“Mickey Davis. Can we talk about it?” He said.

You felt both men’s gaze on you and looked up, “Oh you want me gone?” You said and Sonny nodded. You stood up, put your laptop in your bag, and walked to the door. “Chinese. My place?” You asked Sonny, completely avoiding Rafael. Your best friend agreed and you would be lying if you said you didn’t hope it would make Rafael jealous.

*****

Sonny showed up at your apartment around 8. He was welcomed by Mania’s purrs, he crouched down and pet your ginger cat for a moment. You were sitting in your - destroyed - couch, with a glass a white wine. Carisi knew that seeing Barba after all those years messed with your head.

“How many?” He simply asked.

“Not enough!” You said, but you were obviously tipsy already.

He’d been there many times. He knew that trying to fight to make you stop drinking was useless. So instead, he grabbed a glass and joined you on the couch. Mania jumped on your lap. “Wanna talk about it?”

“I’m just going to say the same things I’ve been telling you for the past three years,” you said, focusing on your cat.

“But now, he’s back. And I don’t think he liked what he heard,”

You looked at Sonny, puzzled, waiting for him to continue. “He was—cold. Unfriendly. And he left saying ‘Enjoy the chinese—and the company’”

“It doesn’t mean anything, Dom. Three years went by. He probably has someone,” you were on the urge of crying but you were fighting yourself. You cried enough for Rafael.

“His lost,” Sonny put his arms around your shoulders and kissed your temple. He gave a pat to Mania, and extended his legs on the coffee table. You rested your head on his shoulder and a few tears escaped.

“Why am I not over him? Why does it still hurt?” You asked. Sonny hummed in response and you continued. “I wish we were married already. I would be committed to you, and he wouldn’t live rent free in my head,”

Sonny giggled, “You sure ‘bout that?” He asked. “Know that cheating is a deal breaker for me. Thinking of someone else while you’re with me is cheating, somehow. So technically, you’re already cheating on me,”

“I’d make up to you, but we’re not there yet. You refused to seal the deal,”

It took Sonny a few seconds to understand what you meant. “And think about Barba while I’m making love to you? Noooo, thank you,”

You grabbed the wine bottle and poured yourself another glass. Mania wasn’t pleased about you moving around so he jumped onto Sonny’s lap instead. “I need a good dick,” you sighed, laying back on the couch.

Sonny wasn’t expecting you to say that. Or at least, not like that. He was taking a sip and choked on wine. He coughed a few times, which made you laugh. “Need me to remind you what happened last year?”

“Noooo, thank you,” you mimicked him. The last year was a mess. You got drunk at Forlini’s and left with a stranger. It was okay at first, the man was good looking and very cautious with you. The sex wasn’t great. He came really fast, you didn’t have time to get pleasure. When you tried to leave, he offered you to stay with puppy eyes, and you caved. The next morning, you tried to sneak out but he heard you and he didn’t want to let you go. So you texted Sonny, asking him to call you and pretend an emergency. Thank god he did. But a few weeks later, you met the guy again at Forlini’s. It lead to a few weeks of stalking from his behalf, until you went all cop on him.

After eating chinese, you went back to drinking as Sonny stopped. You two watched some terrible show on tv until you fell asleep on his shoulders. Used to that, he moved you to your bed and crashed on your couch, with Mania cuddling to him.

*****

You showed up many times at work with hangovers. You were used to pretend you were okay and your coworkers pretended to believe you. The morning went slow, until he showed up.

“Barba!” Fin was the first to see him. “Liv isn’t here,” he continued.

“I came to see all of you—in private?” Fin, Amanda, Kat and yourself looked to one another. “I don’t have all day, detectives.”

They stood up and followed him next to interrogation rooms. But you stayed put. “Y/N,” Rafael softly said.

“Three detectives is enough,” you said, without looking at you. If you looked at him, you’d caved. And you can’t do that. He doesn’t deserve it. Not so easily. Not just because he is his handsome self.

“I hope chinese with your future husband was good,” he answered, bitterly and joined the others, closing the doors behind him. You sarcastically laughed at that. Was it jealousy? You hoped so.

A few minutes later, Liv came in with Garland. He gently greeted you and asked where were the others. You told them without thinking further. And in a minute, Barba was in Liv’s office with her and Garland. Your coworkers went back to their desks but no one talked. “Fill me in?” You asked.

“In so many words, Barba needs our help,” Amanda told you.

“He’s defending the man that Carisi is prosecuting. That’s not fair to Sonny,” you told, anger started to show up.

“Carisi can handle it,” Fin said.

“Damn right he can. But you’re making it harder for him! Our ADA is Carisi now, not Barba! He left me—us,”

You knew it was too late. Your anger toward Rafael just surfaced and the entire team now knows something had happened. Mostly angry at yourself from letting your emotions get the best of you, you grabbed your jacket and left the squadroom.

You drove to Sonny’s office and stormed in it without knocking. He immediately saw your red eyes, and furry in them. “Barba asked the squad for help! And I think they are in!” You were pacing in the small place, making Sonny’s head spin. “They are going behind your back for him! They are helping him, knowing it will make it harder for you! He just—snapped his fingers,” you did snap your fingers, “and they are all in! I can’t believe it,” you were breathing hard, fighting your tears and your anger. Sonny stood, grabbed your shoulders and brought you to his chest. He held you tight as you cried in his chest. He could feel your body shaking. You stood there for a long moment until you calmed down. Sonny let you go and grabbed you a tissue. You dried your eyes and blown your nose. “I’m sorry, you must be tired of me. I’m a fucking mess,”

Sonny was leaning on his desk, arms crossed and legs spread. “Nah, you’re not, Y/N. You’re my best friend and you’re there for me as much,” he softly grabbed your hand and rubbed your knuckles, “Now tell what you’re really mad about,”

“Him. He comes back and tries to act as if—nothing happened. Like we were nothing. Ever,” you took a deep breath, “it just hurts me all over again,”

“Now that he’s here, maybe you should ask for the explanations you’ve been waiting for? You need closure, honey. You deserve it. And yeah, it may not be what you want to hear but at least, you’ll know and you can finally move on,”

“With you when I turn 40?” You tried to joke.

“Or that guy from last year,” he grinned.

“Shut up, Carisi,” Sonny pulled on your arm to bring you to him. As he was leaning on the desk, you were the same height. You put your arms around his shoulders, and his hands were in your back. “What would I do without you?” You whispered in his ear.

“You’d be stuck in a relationship with a weirdo, and probably pregnant by now,” you laughed at his words.

“That would terrible. I’d be so frustrated,”

“Uh, I’d help you with that,”

“Dominick Carisi Jr, isn’t that a sin? May I remind you, you refused to seal our deal,”

“Because if it went bad, I didn’t want you to ask Fin to be your backup,”

“Wouldn’t have worked anyway, he found Phoebe,”

Really, what would you do without Sonny Carisi in your life?

*****

His words didn’t leave your brain. “You need closure, you deserve it”. And maybe he’s right. You do deserve closure, even if he tells you everything you don’t want to hear. So when the trial was over, and Barba invited everyone for a drink, you joined in. You sat between Sonny and Kat, Rafael was across from you. You could feel his gaze every now and then but you tried to avoid meeting his eyes.

“Cheers,” Rafael said, holding his scotch.

“To what? Jury deliberated for 6 hours to find Davis guilty on murder 2 and we’re back to the start,” Sonny answered.

“To irony, then,” Rafael offered instead.

Everyone got interested in Rafael’s past three years. He explained that he traveled for a while, catch up with foreign family in Cuba. He mentioned meeting a woman there but when you heard the word “girlfriend”, you stood up and went to order another glass.

“Y/N!” You heard from your left. You turned to see the man that stalked you the year prior. “Good to see you,” before you could react, Kyle was hugged you. “Been a while,” he smiled.

Not enough. You thought. “Indeed,” you gently returned the smile.

“May I offer you a drink?”

“Thanks, but I’m with my friends,” you pointed towards the squad. Sonny saw the man from behind and he saw in your eyes you were in trouble. But instead of helping you, he was just—laughing. Bastard.

“Maybe later then? Or another day?”

“Kyle. Last year, I threated you to put you in jail for harassment. That threat still stands if you start again,” you looked at him, seriously.

“Actually, I want to apologize about that. I was in a very bad place and I don’t know why I acted the way I did. Can we put that in the past and start all over again?”

Listening to his excuses, you didn’t see Rafael circling around. It’s only when you smell his intoxicating smell, that you knew he was behind you. You sighed and tried to stay focus on Kyle. “Okay look, if you’re still here when my friends leave, maybe—“ you were stopped by Rafael’s arm, as he slided it around your chest.

“Leave her alone, man. You’re not up to her standards,”

“Y/N, who is that” Kyle asked.

You were so confused about what was happening - and a little tipsy - you didn’t react. “The man that has way more chance to take her home than you’ll never have,”

“Well, man, you’re too late. I already took her home,”

You felt Rafael’s fist clenching. “Kyle—I’ll see around okay?”

“I’m not sure I want to leave you with that guy, Y/N,” he answered.

“But you are,” Rafael growled. “Now and forever,”

Rafael made you spin around so you were facing him instead of that Kyle. He instantly grabbed your face in his hands and kissed you right under Kyle’s nose. He was acting like an asshole but there’s no way you could pull him away. You melted into his kiss, granting access to his tongue. You grabbed onto his shirt, pulling him as close as you could. You felt his hands traveling your back, until you were grabbing your ass. For a moment, you forgot you two were in the middle of Forlini’s. You moaned in his month and he felt his cock twitching.

You pulled away only when Amanda made herself heard as she was leaving. “Get a room, people.”

Rafael smiled. “I agree with her. Come home with me?”

“Where’s home for you?” You asked. A kiss can’t make everything go away.

“Home is you, Y/N. You’re my home,” he looked so damn sincere and it would be so easy to just let it go and hang on to those words. But you still need explanations. Apologizes, perhaps?

Again, you fought against your tears. “That’s so easy, Rafael,”

“Come with me and we can talk. Just that if you want,”

*****

During the ride, you told Rafael you preferred to go to your place; Mania was waiting. If Barba should have a pet, he thought he would adopt a dog. But since you have a cat, he can get use to it. Only if you cut its claws.

As always, Mania was waiting behind the door when you got in. He didn’t move at first, just studying Rafael. “He’s already judging me,” Rafael said.

“He only met two humans. Me and Sonny. Before that, he was beaten, famished and threw with the trash. He doesn’t trust humans,”

“That’s something we can bound on,” Rafael kept his distance with your furry child. And Mania did the same. You pet him a moment, gave him his food and joined Rafael on the couch, with a bottle of Sauternes. It was silent at first. None knew where to start.

“Is—is there something between you and Carisi?” He asked.

“Straight to the point,” you smiled in your glass. You liked the hint of jealousy in it. “For now, no. But in 4 years, maybe,”

“I’m gonna need further explanations,”

“I’m the one that needs explanations, don’t you think?” You challenged him. “Actually, I deserve them,” you’ll have to think Sonny later for that strength.

“Indeed, you do,” Rafael agreed. “It was easier that way,”

“Easier for who? For you? Cause it wasn’t easy for me, at all,”

“I was selfish and I’m sorry,” he softly grabbed your hand. “I knew that—if I came to see you, to tell you I was leaving, I would have back down. I couldn’t bring myself to tell you goodbye. All I ever wanted to see in your eyes, when you look at me, was love. And I was afraid to see—disappointment in them. Pity, hate, even. Cause there was hate whenever I looked in the mirror,” you heard tears in his voice. You knew he was just being honest with you.

“You ruined our relationship—or whatever we had— on assumptions, Rafael. I didn’t hate you before you left. I wasn’t disappointed. Only things you’d have seen were empathy and love,”

“I couldn’t take the risk, Y/N,”

“Let’s pretend I get that. Why didn’t you call, then? Text? Left a letter or a note? Hell, even an email would have made it easier,” you stood up, pacing around. Rafael has been around you enough to know that’s what you do when you’re angry and trying to calm yourself.

“I could have. I should have—I’m so sorry,” he was looking at you with pleading eyes but you were still pacing around your living room. “I never forgot about you, Y/N. I still love you,”

“Uh-huh,” you shook your head, “You can’t tell me you still love me when you never said you loved me in the first place!” You exclaimed.

“Fine,” he stood up and grabbed your shoulders to keep you still. “I love you, Y/N. Wanna know when I knew?” He paused, for what you assumed what a dramatic effect like he does in court, “When Yelina came in my office, telling my ‘crazy coworker’ slapped her. And you didn’t slap her because you were jealous. You did so because she hurt me and talked shit about me for going after Alex. When she left, I smiled so hard, I found the courage to ask you out,”

You felt your cheeks turning pink. “I didn’t know you knew,” you looked down but Rafael grabbed your chin and made you lift your head.

“From that moment, I knew you had my back. I didn’t have yours,” you saw a tear finally escaping his eye. “And if you found the strength to forgive me, I’ll always have your back. I won’t let you down. I promise,”

Seeing Rafael cried made you cry too. You swoop his tears with your thumb. “It won’t be easy, Rafael. It’s going to take time for me to—trust you again. To trust that you won’t leave again,”

“I won’t,” he grabbed your face and kissed. It was needy. Rafael wanted you to feel how much he loves you in that kiss. He wanted you to know you could trust him. Not only your tongue mixed but your tears did too. “I promise. I love you,” he rested his forehead against yours.

“I love you, too,” you kissed again, but it was more passionate. One of his arms were wrapped around your shoulders and his other hand was holding your cheek. Your left hand rested on his firm ass and your right one was in his hair.

He smiled against your mouth when he felt your hand grabbing his ass cheek. “That’s my move,”

“What can I say? I missed your ass,”

He chuckled and made you jump in his arms. Your legs wrapped around his waist and his hands were resting on your ass. “Not as much as I missed yours,” Rafael kissed you again and walked to the bedroom, closing it to Mania’s face.

[writefasttalkevenfaster]

Take My Hand (Part Two)

Summary: you thought it was enough, you thought it was what it deserved, but it wasn’t. it never was. (one of three four parts)

Pairings: Rafael Barba x Reader, Sonny Carisi x Reader

Word Count: 5,395

Song: I made you my temple, my mural, my sky / Now I'm begging for footnotes in the story of your life (tolerate it by taylor swift)

Warnings: T, implications of sex, so much angst, some swearing, 

A/N: again thank you to @bucky-of-the-opera​ and @qvid-pro-qvo​ but also @laneygthememequeen​ for giving me feedback and listening to me ramble as i continue to write this series. thank all of you for all of your wonderful comments/reblogs - every one gave me the motivation to keep writing! Also i made these timecards to account for the passage of time since we will be jumping through years quite a bit. 

“Why did we agree to  letting him shadow us again?” Rafael whispers to you, glancing at Sonny working at the conference table — his irritation evident, “it doesn’t give us a lot of time alone.” 

“Well, he’s a law student and a new detective, I’m trying to show him the ropes, and who's the one who got home late last night? Besides, he said he’d buy us coffee to thank us,” you lean away from him, nudging him, mouthing ‘be nice,’ “have you taken Criminal Procedure yet? Or Evidence?” 

“I’m taking Evidence right now, but this is nothing like learning about it in class,” he was flipping helping you root through the discovery that the defense had buried you in — a typical Buchanan maneuver, “Did you always think you would be a prosecutor?” 

You snort, “No,” and Rafael even looks up from his work, and you shake your head, “Well I thought I would go corporate at first, make some money to support myself, invest properly and then retire, but a year into doing that, I hated it. I ended up leaving without barely making a dent in my student loans.” 

“Ouch,” Sonny shook his head, “and you came here? Do you regret it?” 

“I’d be interested to hear the answer to this,” Rafael leans forward, resting his chin on his fist. 

You scoff at him, considering it — did you regret it? “I don’t,” you say, “although I’d be way less in debt, I wouldn’t be happy — I wouldn’t be helping victims, I wouldn’t be getting justice, and I wouldn’t be working with you two — “ Rafael’s gaze softens, “and here, I’m happy,” and you catch Rafael smiling at his desk, before adding, “except when Barba doesn’t get his coffee.” 

Sonny guffaws, trying and failing to hide it with a cough, “You want to get us some coffee, Fordham or are you too busy pulling a muscle from laughing?” 

“Alright, alright,” he holds his hands up in surrender, grabbing his jacket, before leaving, the office door swinging shut behind him. 

“Would it kill you to be a little nicer to him?” Rafael shrugs, rising from his desk, and wrapping his arms around you, “Raf—” 

“Better him than me, right?” he presses a kiss to your shoulder, “I liked it better when he had the mustache.” 

You laugh, shaking your head, as he sighs against the crook of your neck, “Just be nicer to him okay? He’s really trying here, and he’s a good detective.” 

“What’s with the sudden interest in Fordham?” 

You turn to face him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, “His name is Sonny, and he’s sweet — I’m trying to help him out, and you should too. He looks up to you.” 

“Lucky me,” you press a kiss to his lips, “it’s not fair when you do that—” 

You kiss him again, your tongue tasting him, his mouth following yours as you slipped away back into your seat, “Be nice.” 

“As long as you’re nice to me tonight,” he replies, just before Carisi returns, coffees in hand. 

“I hope the shadowing has been helpful, I know Rafael can be an ass—” you shrugged your jacket off, slinging it over your arm, walking beside Sonny, the detective insisting on walking you home. 

“Well he wouldn’t be Barba otherwise, would he?” and you snort, glancing at your phone to see a text from him — working, will be late. Your place? 

“Well you’re right about that,” you tucked your phone away, seeing Sonny run his fingers over his chin and mouth, “missing the stache?” 

“Not really, no, but Rollins made a remark that I looked better with it,” he bites his lips, stuffing his hands in his pockets, “what do you think?” 

You purse your lips in mock thought, holding your chin,  “No, I think I prefer this look,” you laughed, “You look good.” 

“Oh I look good? Really?” and he raises his eyebrows suggestively, and you bump him with your shoulder, “come on, counselor, you can’t play coy.” 

You step in front of him, “Oh yeah, definitely — you’re a real heart stealer,”Before turning on your heel and continuing to stroll, “do you want to grab a drink?” and you didn’t catch the way he was looking at you as you walked away from him — his eyes shining in the low light of the streetlights. 

“Yeah, I’d love to.” 

“We know this guy is guilty,” Amanda told you two, her arms crossed, “but we can’t get past his troop of lawyers to get anywhere close to his employees.” 

Liv leans back in her chair, “So, why don’t you two do your job and get this guy on charges for us?” 

You sigh, scrubbing a hand over your face, “You don’t know that for sure, Liv, and even if you did — it goes against the justice system to just entrap people without a fair process first. We can’t do our jobs, until you guys do yours—” 

“We can’t get more evidence until he’s indicted — he’s too smart, he won’t expect it, he’ll get sloppy,” Liv looks at Barba for support, and as do you, lips a thin line, and he sighs. 

“We’ll get a grand jury together, we’ll send out subpoenas, and see where we are at—” 

You gape at him, “Rafael—” 

“I don’t know counselor, this could be risky—” Carisi steps forward, brow furrowed, “Lieu, she has a point — we take this now, we wouldn’t get another shot at him.” 

“It’s a risk I’m willing to take,” Rafael waved him off, “book him, now.” 

Liv and Amanda left, while Sonny hung around his desk, as you pulled Rafael aside, “Rafael, you literally went over my head—” 

His eyes narrowed, “We need to build a case—” 

You scoffed, “SVU builds the case, we prosecute it — we’re not in the business of using indictments to get our evidence,” you looked around the precinct, eyes flitted away, and you pulled him into Liv’s office, shutting the door, “you undermined me, my opinion—” 

He says your name, “You know I value your opinion but—” 

“Not as much as Liv’s,” and it’s his turn to gape at you, “you know this case doesn't have enough — and you’re pushing it through anyway—” 

“SVU cases are not open and shut—” 

“No case is open and shut— otherwise, we wouldn’t have so many innocent people die of the death penalty would we?” you grit your teeth, “you handle this case — if you want to take a half-baked case to a grand jury I won’t stop you, but I won’t be cleaning up your messes either.” 

He calls after you, but you leave without another word, stepping into the elevator, the doors shutting until a hand stops them — but it isn’t Rafael, “Counselor,” he steps in after you, hitting the ground floor button — the doors shutting, “are you okay?” 

“I’m fine,” his eyes fell on your fisted phone, knuckles white. 

“Your phone would beg to disagree — you’re aboutta crack the screen with your grip,” and your cheeks burn, slipping the phone into your pocket, “you know Lieu has a tendency to become a little blinded when it comes to the victims, she—” 

“I know, Sonny, and most of the time I find that admirable about Liv, but it’s our jobs as prosecutors to bring justice — and that’s not just for the victims, but it’s for society,” your eyes look the ceiling, blinking away hot tears of frustration, “pushing through cases like this isn’t justice — it’s reckless,” the elevator doors ding open, and you slip through, expecting to be alone, but Sonny still follows out the doors of the precinct. 

“I get it,” you huff, slowing to a stop, “I do, really. I may be a cop, but I want to be a lawyer too, and to be one, you gotta see both sides, don’t you? But what do you do when things are gray?” 

“You search for the truth,” 

His lips twisted in a frown, he asks, “and if you can’t find it?” 

“Then you look for the closest thing to it, but this, a fishing expedition—” you shake your head, “this isn’t it.” 

He nods, jerking his head, “Come on, let’s grab a coffee,” 

“I should get—” 

He smiles, “I’m sure Barba won’t mind the extra time to lick his wounds, you really chewed him out,” 

You raised an eyebrow, “How much of our conversation did you hear?” 

“Not much after you went into the office, but it was still obviously heated,” you feel anger sting at your eyes, the heat rising in your body, and instead of fury — it came in tears, how convenient, “but for what it’s worth, I value your opinion a lot, counselor. And I know Barba does too,” he adds, and you follow as he leads you away from the precinct, “he’s just not showing it well.” 

You glanced at your phone — Going back to the office, can we talk? — “No,” you reply, “No he isn’t.” 

But did he ever? 

“Where’d you learn to cook anyway?” your legs were slung over Rafael’s lap one Sunday morning, as he fed you another forkful of the huevos rancheros he had made,  “I thought you lived off coffee and Forlini’s.” 

“Ha, ha,” he kissed you, licking the bit of sauce left on your lips, “well consider it my way of making up for what happened with the case. I am sorry about that, you know that right?” 

“I do,” you open your mouth and he feeds you another bite, “but don’t think I didn’t notice you dodging the question, Barba.” 

He purses his lips, “How about we just say I learned for you and leave at that?” 

You frowned, “Raf,” he fell silent, the gears in his head turning, “you don’t have to talk about it, but you don’t have to lie either.” 

He starts softly, even as he stabs the eggs with his fork, “When my dad went off on one of his tirades, Mami wasn’t in any shape to cook, and she wouldn’t want to ask Abuelita since that would involve telling her what happened — so I would cook for us.” 

You lean over, pressing a small kiss to his cheek, “You never talk about your father,” 

“What’s there to talk about?” he replies quietly, “he married my mom — he was amazing at first, and then just like that,” he snaps his fingers, “he changed. When they got married, he had permission to be the person he always was — angry, disgusting, abusive. He made her cut off everyone out of her life, made her miserable, abused her, abused me—” he cut off, setting the fork down with a clatter, “but still, I see him every day when I look in the mirror — and I wonder if I’m any better than him at all.” 

“Rafael, look at me,” you slide closer to him, your fingers intertwined with his, when you tilt his chin up, “you are not your father — far from it. You help victims get justice, you help them tell their stories, you are a good man, one of the best men I know.” 

He sniffs, a small smile on his lips, “Even when I don’t get my coffee?” 

You roll your eyes, shifting again so your knees are either side of his lap, sitting properly on him, wrapping your arms around his neck, “Even then — Raf, you are so good, I just wish you’d see it — I wish you’d see yourself.” 

He leans up to kiss you, gently, “Maybe I can see myself through you,” he murmurs against your lips, pressing his forehead to yours, and you sit in silence for a moment — in peace, before he finally breaks it, “I think it’s because of him that I’m so scared of us — I don’t want to be him.” 

“You could never be him—”  

“But you don’t know that,” he replies, his gaze falling to his lap, dark, as he shifts you softly off of him, “not really.” 

“Rafael—” he rises from the sofa, his back turned away from you, as he heads to the bathroom. 

“I need to shower.” And he leaves you there, without another word. 

“Working late again?” Sonny poked his head into his office, “it’s 2 AM counselor, isn’t anyone expecting you home?” 

You don’t look up from your work, “I could ask you the same — what are you doing here?” Sonny lifted his scarf off your bookshelf, folded neatly on top of some stacked books and briefs. 

“I just finished my shift at the precinct, and thought I’d drop by and see about picking this up,” he glanced at Rafael’s office, light closed, “No Barba?” 

“No, he headed home for the night,” more like you had insisted on him getting some sleep tonight, plying him with sweet kisses, until finally he left — but now you were left with the work to take care of, “I’m wrapping up some work,” you yawn, stretching, blinking at the detective still standing in your doorway, “aren’t you heading home?” 

“Yeah, I’m just waiting on you — the cases will be there in the mornin’,” he steps forward, offering you your coat, “come on.” 

You pout, “But I didn’t get what I said—” 

“Is it something that can be done tomorrow?” 

“Yes, but—” he shuts off your desk lamp, holding your coat out again. 

“I’ll walk you home,” and you sigh, looking between your work and his hand, before hauling yourself to your feet. 

It was not another ten minutes when your stomach started growling, to which Sonny raised an eyebrow, “Like to share something with the class?” 

Your cheeks burned, as you bite your bottom lip, “I may have forgotten to eat today,” and Sonny shook his head. 

“You don’t sleep, you don’t eat — do you and Barba just run on coffee?” 

“And spite,” you add with a shrug, “how do you get time to eat? You’re constantly running around all over the place.” 

“You have to make the time, whether that’s me eating in my car or taking a half hour to go grab a slice, maybe next time I’ll invite you along,” his hands slipped into his pockets. 

“I’d love to right now, but I am a little sick of takeout, and I think I rather crash at this point,” you rubbed at your eyes, “food can wait until tomorrow.” 

“You need to eat, counselor, or your stomach won’t let you,” his brow wrinkled in thought, “do you have anything at home?” 

“Nothing prepared, I have some things frozen, but nothing that’s ready—” 

“I’ll cook you something, dinner—” he glanced at his watch, “I think it's closer to breakfast at this point.” 

“Sonny, you don’t need to do that—” 

“I want to — to thank you for letting me shadow you and Barba,” his smile is so warm, “I assume he wasn’t too pleased with the idea at first.” 

“You don’t need to thank me — it’s fine—” you started, but he cut you off. 

“Are you hungry?” you pouted, as your stomach growled again, “Strike that, you are, and do you have the energy to cook?” 

“No, but—” 

“No buts, come on,” he clapped his hands together, you stood, biting your lip, “are you not okay with this?” 

“It’s not you, Sonny—” it was the concept of this — having a man over late at night, and you trusted Sonny, you did — he was your friend, but it felt misleading, “I just want you to know I’m seeing someone, kind of.” 

He raised an eyebrow, “Kind of?” 

“It’s not a relationship, but it kind of is — we’re keeping things casual for now,” you licked your dry lips, but your throat was a desert compared to it, “I just don’t want to mislead—” 

He cut you off, saying with your name, “It’s fine,” he offered a small smile, “I get it. Consider me friendzoned — now are you hungry or not?” 

“I am.” you hurried along in front of him, shivering in the cold, not noticing his smile slip from his face. 

“How did you learn to cook?” You were told to sit at your island, watching Sonny root through your fridge, “also, I’m sorry again for the state of my fridge, I’m not home a lot so—” 

“Trust me, I get it,” he pulls eggs, cheese, and a can of tomatoes from the fridge, “and I learned from my mother — she had her handful with my sisters, so sometimes I would cook with her or for her. I got used to it and I liked it.”

“Am I allowed to help or do I just watch?” he crossed his arms, evaluating you, making you sit up a bit straighter. 

“Have you ever poached eggs before?” your expression was enough of an answer, “how about you leave the heavy lifting to me and just do what I tell you.” 

“Yes sir,” and you missed him smiling at your cheeky reply, “What’s first?” 

“We both have the same weekday off?” you drop your purse and jacket on his chair, as he pulls you into his arms, “has that ever happened before?” 

“Not in what? Three years of working together?” he trails kisses down your neck, tugging at your collar, “we can’t waste it.” 

“What are you implying, counselor?” you say in mock surprise, as he walked you backwards, pressing you to the nearest wall. 

His eyes lidded and dark, as his fingers toyed with the buttons on your button up, “I’m implying that I want to spend the day f—” 

There was a knock on the door — both of your heads snapping over. You whispered, “were you expecting anyone?” 

“No?” he whispered back, “it might be someone from the squad, wait in the bedroom—” 

You rolled your eyes, as he strode over to the door, straightening his clothes, and adjusting himself noticeably, to which you snorted — earning you a sharp look over his shoulder,  before you slipped into the bedroom, door shut. 

You heard a woman’s voice speaking, heels clicking against the floor. You pressed your ear to the door, but there was no need because the voices grew louder,  “The bedroom is a mess, Mami,” 

Shit. 

There was nowhere to hide in here — but you didn’t want to come off looking rude either — you spotted Rafael’s headphones and a book on his bed stand. 

Well, oblivious is better than idiotic. 

You adjusted your clothes, sitting on the bed, playing music on your phone loudly, flipping the book open to a random page, just as the door opened, “Now, what could be so bad that you don’t want your own mother to—” She cut off, when she saw you, and you peered up, mouth agape — in fake (and real) astonishment, “well hello.” 

“Hi,” you slipped the headphones to your neck, before pulling them off, setting the book side, as you looked from a bewildered Rafael to his appraising mother, “you must be Rafael’s mother, Lucia,” you introduce yourself, holding out your hand, “I work with your son at his office.” 

She repeats your name, elbowing her son, “This is who you’re always talking about?” 

“Excuse me?” you raise an eyebrow at a flustered Rafael, the tips of his ears and bridge of his nose a beautiful red. 

“Mami, I think I neglected to tell you that—” 

“That you and your gorgeous co-worker here are seeing each other? It would seem so,” she slaps him lightly with her purse, before talking your hand warmly, “it’s very nice to meet you, dear. I apologize for my son’s lack of disclosure—” another pointed look at her son, “I wouldn’t have interrupted your day off together otherwise—imagine if I used the key you gave me.” 

Rafael blanched at the thought, his eyes desperately trying to apologize to you, but you kept your eyes on Lucia, “There’s no need to apologize, I’m sorry for surprising you—” you smiled, your nerves pushed to the very edge — imagine if she had walked a few minutes later, “is there something you need from Rafael?” 

“Not in particular, I was going to ask him if he wanted to join me for lunch— I just cooked his favorite, but now that I see he’s busy—” 

“No, you both should go,” you wave her off, “I don’t want to step on any plans—” 

“Why don’t you join us?” Lucia offered, elbowing her son, “if that’s okay with el juez here?” 

“Of course,” he cleared his throat, his smile sincere, “join us, if you want to.” 

Well how could you say no to that? 

“This is delicious, Lucia,” you and Rafael helped her pick up the table, insisting on her sitting, “thank you again for having me over. It means so much.” 

“I was happy to — my son’s personal life has always been a bit of mystery to me,” she walks over, pinching his cheek, “mijo has a mouth he doesn’t mind running except when it involves his personal life.” 

“Mami,” he warned, and she lifted her hands in surrender. 

“On that note, I’m going to wash up, and I’ll be right back,” you excused yourself to the bathroom, washing your hands, and just as you began to step out, you heard them whispering. 

“So what’s the story here, Rafi? You’ve been together for quite a while — any chance you’ll be popping the question anytime soon?” 

Your heart thumped against your ribcage, leaping out of your chest, “It’s not like that between us, Mami — we’re together but—” and your heart sunk in the same motion — down to the floor, “we’re not serious—” small smack and Rafael’s ‘ouch.’ 

“Do not be such an idiot that a keeper will wait for you this long — it’s a miracle you’ve been together this long,” you hear her sigh, “not serious? The way you look at each other? Rafi, not every person is Yelina—” 

“This isn’t about her,” he cuts her off, exasperated, as you rest your forehead against the trim of the bathroom door, “I know what I’m doing.” 

“You know what you’re doing,” she repeats, the clink of the dishes in the sink, “I hope you do, mijo, or you’ll regret it.” 

Regret, you thought, squeezing your eyes shut — you knew a little something about that, as you slipped from Lucia’s apartment, the door shutting behind you. 

There was urgent knocking on your door — and you placed your book down. Well, this was inevitable. 

You had been avoiding Rafael since the lunch with his mother — taking shifts and working out of your office. He had been texting and calling — you hadn’t been replying — the temptation regulated to the charger in the kitchen. He wanted to explain, he wanted to talk — but he always wanted to explain, he always wanted to talk. And he always talked his way back into your pants with plying words and sweet kisses. 

But now there was nothing more to be said. He left nothing else to be said. 

Even so, it wasn’t his fault entirely  — it was your fault for letting this get so far. 

And why had you let it get so far? That was the one question you couldn’t answer yourself. 

And now, you steeled yourself as you approached the door — you supposed he wanted to have it out in person. 

“Who is it?” you asked, arms crossed. 

“It’s Sonny,” you blinked, his voice unsteady and weak, as you threw open the door, finding him grim faced and dull, the color pulled from his face. 

“Sonny, what happened—” 

“Can I, uh, come in?” you stepped aside, letting him in, shutting the door behind you, and he didn’t sit down — or rather he couldn’t. He paced the length of the room, his eyes on the ground, arms across his chest. 

“Sonny?” you ask hesitantly, as you approach him, his back turned, “what’s wrong?” He faces you, tears streaming down his face, “Sonny—” 

“I’m sorry,” he blinks, wiping away the tears, “I’m fine, I shouldn’t’ve come here, I just—” his voice breaks, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallows, “I didn’t know where to go.” 

“Sonny, stop, you can always come here,” you squeezes his shoulder gently, “sit down, please.” You lead him to the couch, spotting red specks of blood on his neck and on the collar of his shirt, “what happened?” and he tenses, “we don’t have to talk about it right now, okay?” he buries his face in his hands, elbows on his knees, hunched over, “let me get you some water—” 

“Look, I don’t need water — I just need—” he stammers, “please, just stay beside me, please?” 

And you did, your hand reaching for his, fingers slowly intertwining with his longer ones — even with how gentle Sonny was, with how he dwarfed you in size never failed to surprise you, but then again, he was always full of surprises, wasn’t he? His hand was warm and soft, engulfing with its heat, but trembled under your touch. You squeezed it every few minutes, the ones you sat in silence in, to remind him that you were still there — that he wasn’t alone. And you would never leave him to be alone. 

His first words were quiet in an already still room, “Barba has kept you updated on the Quinn Berris case right?” you nod — the woman who had been raped by her stalker, Ray Wilson. Wilson had been arrested by Sergeant Tom Coles four years ago, “We found out that Quinn wasn’t raped by Ray Wilson — it was Coles.” 

Your jaw dropped, “Coles did it—” 

“We went to his house, to confront him,” his voice shook as he spoke, his eyes hard, fixed on your carpet, but he was somewhere else now — back in Coles’ home, “I moved slowly, I did everything by the book, and I turned around, and he had his gun to my head.” 

“Sonny,” you squeezed his hand again, “what happened?” 

“I thought he was going to kill me,” he swallowed, his eyes unblinking, “I can still feel the metal brushing my forehead, following me as I put my gun down,” he leans back, arms crossed again, “I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t do anything. I could hear myself talking, but I didn’t know what I was saying — it was like everything was underwater. If Liv didn’t shoot him—”  

“But you’re okay, Sonny,” you pulled him closer, arm wrapped around his shoulder, “You’re alive.”

“He didn’t have to die,” he whispers, “he could have just surrendered.” 

“He didn’t want to, Sonny,” you shake your head, tears slipping down your cheeks, “he had lost everything, and he wanted to die — and he wanted someone else to go down with him. But you didn’t.”

“You know in the moment, I didn’t even pray,” he gives a bitter chuckle, “years of Catholic schooling and church, but in that moment all I could think of was my family, the squad, you,” he shakes his head, “I’m sorry for coming over and unloading this all on you — I didn’t mean—” 

“Don’t apologize,” you brush away your tears, your hands gently pulling him into a hug, “I’m just so glad you’re okay, Sonny.”  

He rested his chin on your shoulder, finally shutting his eyes for a moment, a peace washing over him for a moment, “Me too.” 

“Not a minute is promised, is it?” you whisper, pulling away, and he shakes his head. 

“Not a second,” and your thoughts fall away to your phone — to Rafael. It could have been him today — or any day. Was it worth holding a grudge, if it meant you wouldn’t see him again? That your last words to him were nothing but silence? 

“Let me get some water, Sonny,” and he nodded, leaning back on the couch, as you slipped away, grabbing a glass, as well as your phone. 

Rafael Barba: Mi amor, please, I’m sorry. Can we talk? 

You: I’m busy today, but tomorrow, we’ll talk. 

“We need to talk,” your office door opened — night had long fallen, the chatter and bustle of the office long died away in the darkness, the washed out fluorescent dimmers flickering in the halls — and there was only one person who would be opening your door right now. 

Rafael stood in your doorway, his knuckles white against the doorknob. Rafael’s brows knitted together, his mouth twisted in a scowl. You leaned back in your chair, raising an eyebrow, “not here.” 

“I can’t step away from this—” 

“You can make time for this,” he hisses, eyes narrowed, but you don’t budge, arms crossed, and he shuts your door, locking it, pulling the shutters down, “You went over my head.” 

You weren’t going to deny it, “I did,” you had went to Jack, talked to him about your concerns about the case you two had been handling together, another case slapped together that Rafael was trying to push through to trial — and you finally had enough, “You didn’t give me much of a choice—” 

“There was a choice — you could have talked to me—” you scoffed, flipping your file closed, “what is that supposed to mean?” 

“Rafael, you’re pushing through cases I don’t agree with — cases without enough information, forcing taxpayer dollars to be used on cases that will not succeed, and yes sometimes that’s necessary, sometimes we have bad cases, but sometimes you’re casting a stigma on people who end up being innocent—” 

“And sometimes casting a stigma is all we can do to warn other potential victims—” 

“And sometimes it just ruins someone’s reputation, and our own when we end up with lawsuits for damages,” you cross your arms, rounding your desk, “just because Liv coerces you into pushing through cases—” 

“Is that what this is about? That you’re jealous of Liv?” he snaps, and you laugh — a bitter noise you don't recognize, “I never thought you would ever let our personal problems affect your judgement.” 

“First of all,” your voice was an eerie calm, a deadly frigid cold permeated your words, “this has nothing to do with your personal life — this has to do with protecting the integrity of this office,” and it was his turn to scoff, "and second of all, what is there to be jealous of, Rafael?" you cross your arms, "We fuck — that’s it. Period. That’s all we are to each other. A warm body, nothing more and nothing less. You’re too busy saving the rest of the world to care.” and you wouldn’t allow your voice to crack, even though you could feel yourself crumbling with every word that you spit like venom — poisoning him and you from the inside out, “we're not serious,” you echo his words, a sinking feeling in your gut. 

“That was out of context—” 

“It’s not out of context when I heard the entire conversation, Rafael,” you shake your head, turning away from him, to look out your window — lights dotted the streets, the city very much alive with so many other places to be. 

His reply is quiet, “Is that all I am to you?” 

“I should be asking you that,” you sigh, clutching at your forehead, “no matter how much we talk about it — how much we try to fix it, we can’t. We can’t. Call this a failed experiment, call this nothing, say it never existed, it doesn’t matter. It’s done.” 

“No,” you shake your head, grabbing your jacket, brushing past him when he tries to stop you, his hand brushing your shoulder — and you knew what he would do again — ply you with kisses, whisper sweet lies that covered the bitter truth, patching shreds that fell to pieces—  “no, mi amor—” 

“Don’t call me that,” you whirl around, tears stinging at the corners of your eyes — but you hoped your words stung more, “don’t call me that when you never loved me.” 

And they did. 

He whispers your name, “Please—” 

“I can’t do this,” you shake him off, walking out the door, “not now.”

And maybe not ever. 

[takeeachdayonebookatatime]

Castle fanfiction part

Staring the cast of Castle

Why did you elbow me? 38

Lost

Part 15

Martha: pov we played some board games as a family we decided to play Scrabble. I know after the last incedend you would think we would not want to play again but you are wrong. And yes Katherine won once again. But Richard behaved himself this time and did not make a big scene.

Castle: pov The nap seemed to help Kate; she was less tired. Her new thing was taking naps. Her Doctor said it was normal. Her body's way of telling her she needs a break/rest. At 10: 40 pm we went to bed. Kate plugged in her phone and got in her cute pajamas. They were light blue with elephants on them. Her mother liked elephants. On her desk at the precinct were some elephant figurines her mom gave her. In the morning Kate had a meeting with the chief of police and the police commissioner. She unplugged her phone and made it out the door on time. She had showered, stretched, eaten breakfast and taken her pills. I was getting some writing done today at noon. I stopped by the precinct with lunch since Kate had finished her meeting.

Kate: pov the meeting was good. Castle texted me at 11:30 that he was stopping by with lunch for me, Esposito, Ryan and Lanie. Castle was walking into the precinct with his arms full of food. The tacos were amazing. They came with some chips and cheese on the side. The cheese was a little bit spicy but not much. I got a call about a missing kid who was 5. Usually when a kid goes missing it is all hands on deck. Thankfully we had no case today. Lilly had been missing for a while. The higher ups told me Liv from svu was interviewing the parents as we speak.

……………………...............

At svu headquarters

Amanda: pov hey Liv we are getting a phone call about a missing 5 year old girl the police are sending her parents over to us since they are busy with a shooting of some sort.

Liv: pov okay Amanda I will be waiting in my office. Send them in when they get here.

Amanda: pov got it by the way Captain Beckett from the 12th precinct homicide division is helping out on the case they are having a slow day today.

Liv: pov I introduced myself to the parents as Captain Olivia Benson of the Manhattan SVU 16th precinct. I tell them I have been on the job for 23 years and climbed the ranks from detective. I asked them about their daughter Lilly and when was the last time they saw her Lillian and Ken said earlier today in the morning she went outside to play and we never saw her again. We looked everywhere but could not find her. I had my tech guy jarred and Kate's had her tech girl Victoria looking for security camera footage. Lilly finally appears on security footage walking by herself towards a wooded area alone. At least we know where she went. Into the woods, I called Kate and had her get her officers while I got mine. We were heading into the woods.

………………………

On the way to the woods.

Kate: pov So far they don't think it is an abduction. They think Lilly wandered into the woods alone. Once at the site Me and Liv were in charge of the search parties in the woods. Liv went right and I went left. Eventually both paths would meet in the middle. Esposito and Ryan were checking with nearby homeowners to see if they saw anything. I'm surprised Castle was not complaining at all. Ryan called to let me know a lot of kids go into these woods to look for fairies. rumor has it you can find some in these woods. I made sure Liv heard that also. She said it makes sense why Lilly would wander into the woods alone.

Liv: pov it would be starting to get dark soon. Fin had offered to ride in the helicopter that was flying overhead to look for the child. The pilot's job is to fly the plane Fin is in charge of looking for the child.

Castle: pov After more than an hour of walking Kate and Liv were about to meet up, their paths were about to meet. I could just make out Liv in the distance. That is when we heard Fin shouting that we were close to Lilly. we could hear her crying. Liv approached first it was Lilly she was crying because she was lost. I'm not sure if she is injured. Liv was looking her over to see if she was injured because she was leaning/sitting up against a tree all weird. Liv pulled a flashlight out and shined it into Lily's eyes and had her follow it. She said she thought Lilly might have a minor concussion, nothing serious, just a killer headache. Once she calmed her down, I offered to carry her the whole way back. Kate and Liv chatted while we walked.

Kate: pov Once back to the command post outside of the woods Castle carried Lilly to the waiting ambulance. The parents thanked us so much. All of us decided to call it an early night. Castle suggested we all go to the arcade for dinner. He used to take Alexis all the time when she was little. It would be so much fun for the kids. Liv and Amanda decided to pick their kids up for the arcade but agreed not tell them where they were going. It was a surprise.

Liv: pov I ran home and picked up Noah. I told him I got off work early and we are going somewhere fun to eat dinner.

Amanda: pov I got Billie and Jesse in the car all they knew was we were going someplace fun to eat dinner.

Alexis: pov dad invited me to the arcade for dinner he said Liv and Amanda were bringing their kids. I hope you don't mind since they are Kate's friends