#c!xisuma x y/n

[patxhwrk]

greetings. could u write a little imagine thing for ethoslab? watcher!reader or dsmp!reader thanks! preferably male reader. take ur time if u do write it. stay hydrated.

my fuck this is such a good idea thank you anon for being so smart

anyways dsmp reader with angst sorry about that

completely forgot u asked for an imagine so have a whole fic instead. I might write a seperate imagine for this one too tho

-ˋˏ✄— Bubbling Memories

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Ethoslab x Male! DSMP! Reader

Pronouns: he/him

"You're more home to me than any house is."

.navigation. // .hermitcraft & empires smp masterlist.

CW!!

—Mentions of character death

—Implications of self-harm & attempt su*c*de

—Blood

—Derealization(?)

Every second spent in that lawless server—ironic, considering it had been laws that started wars—was spent in the echoes of left behind misery. There was never silence in that world. If you managed to stumble upon even a sliver of quaint and quiet, you would find that it would have been better to have the ear piercing noise.

Y/n was lucky enough to have been left with one life. The last thing he remembered from the old server was the sorrowful eyes of his friends waving goodbye as he left. The portal—it vaguely reminded him of a nether portal if it was pink—shrunk as Tubbo's and Ranboo's backs turned to leave.

He hugged the blue stained yellow sweater closer to himself as he turned towards the new server—his new server—as the habitants greeted him with warmed welcome arms.

He was half afraid of building something that took effort. But one reassuring conversation with Xisuma—the man somewhat resembled Dream. Why was his mask fucking green?—coaxed him into building one of the biggest and best things he had ever created in his life. Well, it was just an "improved" Logstedshire, but it was the thought that counts, right? Building it reminded him of the time he spent with his brothers—though one had been a ghost, it was fine. He even put a bell where he and Tommy would—!

His hands stopped swinging the bell.

Tommy was dead. His younger brother had visited Dream in the prison where he was left to die. And he left his brother because he was too much of a pussy to confront the same man who had tormented him until he had a knife barely glazing at the skin of his throat.

He shook his head, running his hands through the mop he called hair as the bell ringed a final time. It silenced before it stilled. And then Y/n left his base.

Voices rang in his ear—was it his?—as he scolded himself for building something that gave him so much horrible memories more than the good ones. Why can't be just be like Ghostbur? Forgetful of the sorrows and always looking at the sun even through dark clouds.

His arms found comfort in himself, wrapping around each other as his nails dug into the skin under the yellow sweater. Wilbur wouldn't mind if he stained it, right? Wilbur would reassure him that it was fine, he was fine, it was all fine. And then he'd take the sweater and wash it. Because Wilbur was a good big brother.

No, Wilbur's dead. His brother was long dead before Philza killed him. Ghostbur wasn't like Wilbur, either.

He walked aimlessly around the server. He would have reminded himself of Ranboo's enderwalking state if he was in his own head. He watched as he passed by builds, ignoring the calls of concerned friends—friends? He had friends now?—as his feet brought him further and further from the build that he longed to blow up. Longed to tear into shreds bare handed as the memories of a pain long buried but never forgotten bubbled back to his head. Longed to feel the blood coat his fingers as his fists crashed through the shards of glass that showed the reflections of himself—a man who was too much of a coward to save his little brother. Too much of a coward to stop his father from killing the brother he looked up to. Too much of a fucking coward to just shove the knife through his chest, in the same place the sword dyed the sweater blue.

He longed to let his hands, his arms, his whole body fucking hurt. The seating hot pain that followed, the ache, the numbness, before it disappeared and he'd wake up with one less life left.

A hand was placed on his wrists. Cold, it was so fucking cold, as it pulled his shaking hands away from the yellow—now red stained sleeves—sweater.

It jolted him awake. Whether it was the cold, the tug of his arms, the way his voice called to him, or his concerned eyes searching for something—just something—in Y/n's unfocused stare.

"Y/n, hey," Etho's voice was gentle. He was patient as he tried to bring Y/n's eyes to his own. "Hey, hey, I'm here."

"I—Etho?" Y/n's voice was barely above a whisper, almost inaudible to Etho if he hadn't been paying close attention to him. "What—?"

Etho's arms wrapped around his midsection, pressing him against himself as his hand raised to hold Y/n's head gently. "Thank void you're okay."

Hesitantly, Y/n wrapped his arms around Etho's neck. He hadn't realized his legs were shaking until his whole weight was leaned against him. But Etho didn't complain, he was strong enough to carry Y/n if he ever needed. And he did now.

Y/n sniffled. He didn't stop the tears flowing out of his eyes as he buried his head on Etho's shoulder. And Etho let him. He buried his head on his hair as Y/n's whole body shook.

Pressing a feather light kiss on the crown of his head, Etho whispered in the quiet forest. "It's okay, you can cry. But it is never your fault. None of it is."

Y/n's eyes searched the distance, and he realized just how far he walked when he spotted the world border a distance away. He sniffled and hiccuped as Etho gently and patiently combed through his hair.

He shook off his thoughts before it could remind him of a memory long past and buried himself further into Etho's clothes. It smelled like redstone, and the glowing red dust was enough to tell Y/n that he was working on a project before hand.

"Let's get you home, shall we?"

"No, not my place. Please don't bring me back there, not again."

Etho nodded. The pain in Y/n's voice stung his heart, and he knew he had to make him feel better. He kneeled down for a short second just to hook his arms under Y/n's knees and bring him up to carry him easier. Y/n's head still nested on his shoulder as he took off to the direction of his own base.

"My place, then."

"You don't have a proper base yet, Etho." Etho felt the upwards tug of his lips. His eyes glanced down to Y/n's whose reddened eyes watched the path they took.

"Hey, it's a home to me and it'll be a home to you!" He laughed to lighten the mood. Y/n's quiet chuckles followed after him and he smiled down at him.

"Thank you, Etho."

"Anytime, sweetheart."

Y/n could take down improved Logstedshire when he felt better. Then, he wouldn't have to do it bare handed. Or alone, he reminded himself, as his eyes found dual coloured eyes.

Right now, he was just content to be with Etho.

—PATCHWRK !

[frog-writes-for-fun]

Hello! May I pretty please request a fluff, friends to lovers with Xisumavoid? Like they go stargazing and at some point he just accidentally reveals his crush for the reader, but is too embarrassed to continue? And that's when it comes to the trope of "Sooo you love me?" "...I guess??!?"

Thanks in advance and have a good day! Love your writing! :D

Anon, you know the key to my heart. Friends to lovers, Xisuma, stargazing and astronomy, embarrassed characters! How do you know all of my favourites?

Brighter Than All the Stars in the Sky

c!Xisuma x gn!Reader

Summary: You go to show Xisuma some of the constellations that catch your eye in the night, only to find him watching something he thinks is more beautiful than any star you could show him.

Notes: Have a nice fluffy Xisuma piece! Also, stars! Go look at the new space pictures if you haven’t already! Love (/p), an astronomy nerd.

You were excited. Astronomy was a passion of yours, and you’d finally convinced your best friend (and crush, but no one needed to know that) to go stargazing with you. As sunset approached, you were practically dragging Xisuma with you into the forest. 

“C’mon! The sky is supposed to be really clear!” Xisuma laughed at your excitement. He’d never quite understood how watching the sky could be so interesting, but since seeing how it was so important to you he’d become more open to the idea.

Eventually, you brought him into a clearing. A blanket was laid out on the ground, and the trees were far enough apart for you to see a wide circle of the sky.

Moving towards the centre of the ring, you dropped onto the blanket. Looking up at Xisuma, you patted the spot beside you. Smiling at you, he lowered himself to the ground. The two of you leaned back until you lay completely horizontal, looking up at the dusk.

Soon, it was truly dark and tiny pinpricks of light twinkled in your vision. You began to show Xisuma some of your favourite constellations and stars.

“Look!” Pointing upwards, you grinned. Tracing a line between a few stars with your finger, you drew a shape in the sky. “It’s that one nebula! The… um. The Orion Nebula! That’s it!”

A low chuckle came from your companion. “It’s beautiful.” Turning your head, you saw that his gaze was not on the stars above, but on you. Giggling, you reached over to tap his nose. 

“Silly, you’re not even looking at the stars!”

“I don’t need to. I’m looking at the brightest of them all.” Your eyes widened, and Xisuma’s face immediately flushed red. “I said that out loud, didn’t I?”

It took a moment for you to collect your thoughts and respond. “Um. Yeah, you did.”

Xisuma quickly stood up, abruptly turning and walking straight into the surrounding woods. Scrambling up, you followed him. “Where are you going?” 

“I’m going to go fall into a pit and die.” Half-laughing, you grabbed Xisuma’s arm to stop him from going further. 

“Why would you do that?” With light effort, you spun him around to face you. As you did so, Xisuma ducked his head, burying his face in his hands. “I’d miss you!”

A low murmur was all you could hear. Gently, you took one of X’s hands in your own and pulled it away from his mouth. “What was that?”

His eyes peeked over his other fist. With the limited view of his face, it was still obvious that he was flushed. “Because I didn’t mean to say that, and now you know and I never meant for you to know and I can’t exactly take it back because I mean it.” Progressively his speech sped up until he was nearly tripping over his words at the end. 

A beat passed. Two. Then you realized what he meant. “Oh.” Your grip on Xisuma’s hand loosened, but he left it in your grasp. “Oh.” You smiled. “So you… Oh, X.”

Reaching up, you drew his remaining hand from his face. Cupping his cheek, you made him meet your gaze. “You love me?”

Slowly, he nodded. “Yeah.” His eyes drifted away from your face.

“Good.” At your statement, Xisuma’s eyes shot back to your own. He started to speak, to ask something, but you leaned in and shut him up before he could get the words out. 

Drawing back, you opened your eyes to find Xisuma staring at you. He opened his mouth, then shut it. After repeating the action a few times, he finally choked out some words. “I… You just… What?”

You smiled gently. “I love you too.”

[moriiartist]

Xisuma is like dream in ways; admin, green, mask. Why not make a fic about that? When the reader goes to HC after DSMP, X falls in love with them, but reader is scared of him because of his similarity to dream. He grows on them though, and then love <3333333 You’re scar writings always make my day btw pls keep them coming! <3

‧₊ BRUTAL

PAIRING: C!Xisumavoid x GN!Reader

SYNOPSIS: Healing what’s broken is hard work, but some people are worth the effort.

WARNINGS: Language, self depreciation, implied/referenced violence, implied/referenced abusive relationships, implied/referenced death, poor self-care, panic attacks, PTSD symptoms

A/N: GIRL HELP, I BLACKED OUT AND WHEN I WOKE UP I HAD WRITTEN FIVE THOUSAND WORDS. This is honestly the most self-indulgent thing I think I’ve ever written for you guys, so... I’m kinda exposing myself to the masses😅. I was thinking of season 8 while making this, but it’s kinda ambiguous. (Oh, and I did combine 2 requests for DSMP!Reader x Xisuma, so if you requested something similar to this, I hope you enjoy!)

There’s a certain mindset that you have to have to survive those years you had spent in your own personal hell, a certain fire that had to burn within to look at yourself in the mirror, to face the countless scars that mottled your flesh, and know the story behind each one.

It was supposed to be fun, to just… hang out and play with your friends. Pick stupid fights, prank people, and walk away still knowing that the other didn’t really hate you. Wouldn’t that have been a fucking fantasy, huh?

Now, having lived through several wars, a dictatorship, a portion of your home being blown to kingdom-come at least thrice, and a mind-controlling viny red egg thing taking over the server, such dreams were laughable, at best.

Whoever came up with the concept of limited server lives was either a sadist or didn’t fully understand the implications of how it would feel to be constantly on guard, your fight-or-flight response shot to hell from the near-permanent adrenaline rush you coasted on seemingly every moment of every day. To be fair, though, you don’t think that anyone would’ve predicted just how perverted the mechanic could become when put into the wrong hands. 

Well, that wasn’t exactly true- there was one person who did. (Your hands white and shaking on the pommel of your sword, frozen in place as you watched him drive an arrow through-)

You don’t really remember how you became tangled up with Dream. You don’t really think it matters, in the grand scheme of things. However you had met, whatever you had done to become close, you had fallen for the masked man’s honey-laced words and saccharine promises, and had held his hand as he walked you straight through the gates of Hades.

There’s a certain mindset you had to have in order to live in the Dream SMP, but the moment you and the rest of the players that had managed to survive were suddenly spit back out into the World Hub with no prior warning or reason given… well, it felt as though everything you had learned over the years was suddenly useless.

Disorienting felt like too bland a word to describe the abject confusion and dawning horror you felt when it became obvious that the traumatizing events that had transpired on the SMP were, for lack of a better term, well known.

Those few visitors that Dream had whitelisted for a day or two? It turns out that they had not been quite as oblivious to the barely-contained tensions and conflict that brewed underneath the cheery façade that the admin and famous speed-runner had tried to maintain, and it hadn’t been long before word had spread that everything was not as it seemed in your server. (Trying to hold back a gag as tears flooded your eyes, the echoing sounds of explosions and screaming fuzzing out as you struggled to focus on reality-)

Based on what you overheard, though, both from other players and through the channels of knowledge that seemed to just kind of… manifest… between worlds, the actual specifics of what had happened hadn’t made their rounds yet- none of the wars, the betrayals, the horrors that you had been forced to endure (and commit).

Consequently, people seemed to mostly be focused on the fact that a whitelisted server had turned to anarchy- a phenomena that was completely unheard of in modern times, when admins were put through such a thorough vetting system before they were granted their abilities. 

Dream’s status as one of the most famous players in this era was really only the cherry on top of the pie.

In some ways, having everyone know the bare minimum was worse than when you felt isolated, alone with nobody beyond a few tenuous allies at your side. The hushed murmurs that seemed to follow your every step as more and more players realized who you were, where you had come from. The eyes that seemed to scorch holes into the back of your head, even more than usual.

Even one person’s attention was enough to put you on edge, but having people traveling between servers outright stop and stare at you only made you painfully aware of just how vulnerable you were without gear. Prime- sometimes it was hard not to believe that the gods had it out for you, personally. (Maybe you deserved it-)

Despite all the attention you had received, though, receiving an invitation to join Hermitcraft was the last thing you had expected. 

The group was widely known for being… well, hermits. The only time they really interacted with other people outside of their group was during MCC, the championship games in which only the most elite players were invited to compete in. Even then, they were too busy to stick around for the festivities afterward- something about how they had too many projects they all had to work on to stick around.

If you were being honest, you didn’t quite believe their excuses at first. I mean- who would have that much work to do on a world that they’d spent years in? However, after you had first been contacted by the group it had quickly become obvious that their server operation was wildly different from anything you had seen before.

They called each world they worked on a ‘season’, and they were meant to be impermanent. Every one to two years or so, they abandoned everything that they had been working on- their builds, their Redstone contraptions, their weapons and armor all left behind. Archived. Collecting dust in some long-forgotten shulker. (Gods- you couldn’t even remember the last time you had heard the term ‘shulker’, much less seen one)

Naturally, your knee-jerk reaction was: “What the fuck.”

It was… absurd. Utterly, completely insane. Nobody in their right mind would ever give up something that they had worked so hard for without a fight, especially with how rare it was to make something without it getting griefed or looted almost immediately upon its completion, sometimes even before that. 

It took a hell of a lot to convince somebody to just- hand something like that over with no expectation of getting it back. But these people did, for seemingly no reason. Was it their admin that orchestrated it? Was there some kind of instability that forced them to leave? Were they just fucking crazy?

That was what was so scary to you about accepting their offer- you had absolutely no idea. About anything.

Despite how honestly fucking terrifying it was to live in the Dream SMP, you had to admit that there was at least some familiarity with how things were run. You kept to yourself and the few allies you had, trying to keep as much out of the way of the Big Bads™ as much as physically possible. You traveled light, kept your valuables close- coming home to find your house half-blown up wasn’t an unusual surprise. Nobody went to the crater that once was L’Manberg anymore, not unless they had a death wish.

Life was hard (Gasping for breath as you awoke from yet another nightmare, the sticky sensation of your sweat clinging to you feeling more like blood as his face flashed before your eyes-), but it was the same for everyone. You had been fine. 

However, now you had nowhere to go. You’d been thrust from a familiar environment, albeit a hostile one, into a completely unknown situation. There was no other server that you were traveling to, no arrangements made- in essence, you were stranded.

So, despite your initial shock, that was why you found yourself accepting the offer that had been extended to you. It would be stupid not to, especially when you had nothing to lose. Not anymore.

Your first impression of the Hermitcraft server was… strange, to say the least. The admin had arranged for you to join when they switched to their newest season, so you would start off the same as everyone else in terms of resources. So, blessedly, the wealth gap was going to be far less intimidating than you had initially assumed, but- you don’t know- it was just… weird.

The first thing you were greeted with as you stepped through the hub portal was the excited chatter of multiple players, laughter as they greeted one another and fooled around while they waited for the admin to log on. It was definitely new for you to wake up at spawn and not be immediately greeted by something unpleasant- the obstacles that had been built around it in the early days of the SMP, or worse, later.

The momentary hush that settled over the group wasn’t exactly something you were used to, either, feeling your skin start to burn as several sets of eyes snapped to you, alerted to your arrival by the buzzing of their communicators. Prime- where was Tommy when you needed him? 

Despite how abrasive the kid could be, spitting out insults and threats with his signature cackling voice, he was one of the first people to make you feel at home on the SMP, giving you a tour and making you laugh at his childish blustering. If he was here, you know that he would’ve made some comment about how jealous all of his wives would be at the staring. It hurt to admit it, but gods you missed the blonde. (Watching as he dragged the teen away to exile, the signature grin etched on his mask seeming to ooze with smug victory as he ripped what little the kid had left away-)

Awkwardly, you offered your greetings with a half-hearted wave, picking apart the players in front of you with guarded eyes as they each introduced each other to you eagerly.

The first thing you noticed about the group was how unconcerned they seemed to be with their own safety as they welcomed you to the server, excitedly chattering amongst themselves as well as with you about their upcoming plans for the season. That alone was enough to knock you off-kilter, but when the short parrot avian- Grian, you remembered- offhandedly gave you an invitation to build near him, you couldn't help the incredulous snort that escaped you. Honestly, did these people have no sense of self-preservation?

However, it quickly became obvious to you that, no, this was just their normal. 

As you assessed the group, you became painfully aware that… well, these people had never gone through what you had. For most of them, their skin was smooth and unmarred beyond the occasional thin scar- clearly remnants of a respawn (except for that one brunette, who was mottled with them), or wounds that had been treated with health pots. Their faces were bright, practically filled with a kind of luminous joy as they interacted with one another.

Casual touches weren’t met with flinches or a hand reaching for a weapon out of reflex, nor was there any animosity between the groups that seemed to naturally form as time went on, each Hermit treating the other kindly regardless of how close they were.

These people… these people had never had to endure what you had. Couldn’t even begin to imagine the pain of what you had witnessed. (Watching as the person you loved most in the world fade away, replaced with a monster that reveled in the power he leveraged over other people)

You pointedly ignored the way that the singular tattoo of a heart inked on the inside of your wrist ached at the thought.

It was hard to ignore the way that you seemed to stick out amongst the group, the hard line of your shoulders and the wariness in your eyes setting you apart from the rest of the crowd like a wolf in a doghouse. Despite their friendly advances, the others picked up on it as well, smiles fading ever-so-slightly and bodies shifting nervously as you passed them by.

You couldn't blame them- after all, you weren’t one of them anymore. Not as you were left envious, yearning for the easy camaraderie they shared, and the affection that had been denied to you.

If you thought that was bad, though, the moment you came face-to-face with their admin was even worse. So, so must worse.

By some universal stroke of misfortune, another funny trick that the world seemed so fond of pulling on you, Xisuma was… well, the resemblance he had to him was undeniable. 

A cursory glance was enough to set your heart pounding in your chest, the dark green color of his bodysuit melting into a sickening lime green within your periphery. You weren’t breathing when your eyes snapped back to him, your panic spiking at the sight of his mask before you finally, finally realized that it wasn’t who you thought it was. He wasn’t Dream.

That split-second comparison, borne out of a survival instinct honed throughout weeks, months of never knowing when the next hit would land- that was enough for your brain to start making connections.

Xisuma had an affinity for green, wearing a dark steel and silver mask that covered his entire head, barring a panel of tinted glass to see out of. While intimidating, it also served to obscure his expressions. Body language wasn’t exactly the easiest thing to read, especially in someone you had hardly even met.

The way he spoke, the confidence in which he held himself with- it was like looking at the distorted reflection of your own personal demons, memories of a blank smile making you shudder as you instinctively made yourself smaller, less noticeable. Sinking back into the shadows as he chatted with the rest of the group.

Of course, because you couldn’t have anything nice, he spotted you the moment you were distracted, having been reluctantly pulled into a conversation with Scar about something or other- cats, probably?

Whatever small amount of tension you had lost in your body returned tenfold when you felt the heat of someone’s gaze burning holes into your back, natural defenses springing up as you turned to make eye contact with him. Your hand fell to where the pommel of your sword would normally sit at your hip only for your fingers to meet air. Gods damn it all. 

“Xisuma, right?” you said first, hefting the next best weapon available in your arsenal aloft- words. Giving him the opportunity to speak first would be conceding the first move to him, and you were sick and tired of having to react to other’s attacks.

Keeping your face and stance neutral, you gave him no hint that you were off-put by his sudden interest in you. You weren’t sure if you succeeded.

He inclined his head, stepping forward to offer you his hand. Wound as tight as a bowstring, you stared at it for a moment before accepting. “Yup, welcome to Hermitcraft.”

The majority of his palm was covered by a thick gauntlet made out of some kind of thick cloth (Kevlar, perhaps?), but his tan fingers warm and calloused- the hallmark of a person more than comfortable with a blade. He squeezed your hand once before letting go.

Up close, the admin’s eyes and brows were visible through the thick glass that made up part of his helmet. What features you could make out were relaxed enough, but there was still that slightest crease between both of his dark brows, that thoughtful, seeking facet to his eyes. Intelligent, determined. Curious.

Xisumavoid was dangerous, you decided. The best thing for you to do would be to fuck off to some distant corner of the map, hole up, and keep out of his way for the remainder of the time you would spend here.

A decent plan, but only if Xisuma had gotten the memo.

The Hermits spread out across the island you had spawned on fast, forming their own little communities. You noted how the groups you had picked out earlier seemed to, for the most part, stick together- Grian, Mumbo, and Scar forming their own faction to the north of the island that everyone had spawned in on, while the creeper and wolf hybrid that had reminded you so much of Sam and Ponk (well, before everything happened) set up east.

And you? Well, seeing as everyone stayed relatively close to one another, you built yourself a boat and planned to get the hell out of dodge, traveling a couple thousand blocks until you felt safe enough to settle- that is, until you ran into a slight problem. 

It turns out, another difference between the Dream SMP and Hermitcraft was that your previous server had lacked a world border- a magical barrier that was set up by admins to prevent players from ranging too far and causing… issues, to put it lightly. Lag. Which is very, very dangerous for the health of a server and its members.

Nobody really knew what lag was, exactly- whether it was a glitch in the foundations of the universe itself, or the act of irritated gods. It was the kind of thing that crept up on a server, distorting the world into something a step to the side of reality. Redstone machines would break, animals wouldn’t spawn… hell, it was difficult to even get around when there was an overabundance of lag.

However, besides all the normal issues that would throw a wrench into the workings of a server and possibly lead to player deaths, the biggest (and most dangerous) aspect of lag was its effect on respawning.

There were too many stories, too many tales about how people just… disappeared after they died. Eaten up by the endless, unforgiving expanse of the void that whispered beneath bedrock.

Just thinking about it made you shiver.

Lag was easy enough to manage on most servers, there really only being ten to twenty players on average per world. However, that was when you were speaking about average players- those who made their way through life goofing around with friends, perhaps even entering some low-level Hypixel competitions, but never really going beyond that. 

Even the Dream SMP, despite how glitchy the server got during Doomsday, never really had an issue with those sorts of things. Any big Redstone machines were either used only once, or were broken too quickly to make much of a difference in the world’s operation.

Compared to everything you had ever experienced, Hermitcraft itself was practically a myth- a beast of a server, filled with some of the most legendary players to grace the universe. It was a miracle that their worlds could handle the sheer enormity of their bases and builds, so in theory, it didn’t surprise you that their admin would have to take extra measures regarding lag safety.

However, that didn’t exactly mean you were expecting it when you ran into the world border, a giant, shimmering wall of magic and static electricity that resisted any attempt you made to breach it. A cage keeping you in, trapped where you would really rather not be.

It made sense to you, really. If players were kept within a small space, then the server wouldn’t have to use as much magic to support an infinite expanse. It was logical.

Still, it fucked up your plans, forcing you to settle in the eastmost chunk of land you could reach- an arid savannah biome. (You resolutely tried to forget a different savannah biome, swallowing back the sting of guilt-regret-guilt that threatened to pull you under)

Those first few weeks you dedicated yourself to the grind, getting as much food, supplies, and armor as you could, spurred on by the ever-present knowledge that you could be attacked at any time, have everything taken away once more. You worked your way through the cave systems that wound underneath your hastily constructed base. You set up an experience farm near one of the many spawners you had found, allowing yourself to invest just that little bit of time and effort to get levels.

All-nighters were common, nightmares even more so. The dark circles under your eyes were as well-worn as your armor, practically looking like bruises, and even on your best days you were never not aware of just how exhausted you were.

It was on one of the bad days that Xisuma decided to stop by for the first of his many little ‘trips’ to your base.

You had taken a quick break in between tasks, promising yourself that you would get back to work soon, but… well, you had nodded off, leaning against the trunk of the gnarled acacia tree you had left to shade your farm. It was comfortable there, where the warmth of the air and the shade of the leaves created the perfect temperature, and where you had taken off your heavy breastplate and helmet to shed some weight.

Your eyes slipped closed, and when you opened them, it was to see the silhouette of an armored figure looming over you.

You couldn’t even remember it- one second you were blinking awake, and the next you had pinned them down, one hand holding a dagger to his throat and the other pinning their wrists down. You were panting, great, heaving breaths that sounded almost like sobs, heart jack-hammering in your chest like it wanted to break free.

“What the fuck are you doing?” you choked out, your entire body trembling from fear and adrenaline.

They coughed, and all of the sudden you recognized the helmet, the armor, the dark eyes that watched you with equal amounts of shock and concern. Xisuma- the admin- was held under the weight of your body, glossy netherite armor digging into the soft of your belly through the flimsy shirt you wore. You had attacked the admin. The admin, who now had full reason to get revenge on you.

Your panic only grew at the realization. No- no. You were not going to have a panic attack right now. You couldn’t.

You were up and stumbling back before you could blink. “Fuck- I am so sorry. I don’t- I don’t even know what came over me. I shouldn't've- sorry, sorry.”

Slowly, carefully, Xisuma sat up, telegraphing his movements like one might do when faced with a frightened animal. You didn’t see that, though- all you could see were the weapons strapped to his belt, the 

The cloying fog of fear descended over you, threatening to send you spiraling into a panic. Your heart felt like it was racing a mile a minute, breaths coming faster and faster until the familiar sensation of nausea welled in your gut and crept up your esophagus. 

It could’ve been seconds or minutes you spent like that, unseeing, unfeeling, desperately trying not to gag, but when you dragged yourself back into consciousness someone was pressing your hands to their chest, ribs flexing as they took exaggerated breaths. Their voice slowly filtered through the fog of panic that set over you.

“-You need to keep breathing, okay? In for five, out for seven. Can you do that? Follow my breathing, like this.”

Finally registering the pinched and burning feeling in your lungs, you inhaled, the dizzying rush of oxygen making you lightheaded as you blindly tried to match the rhythm of the other person’s inhales and exhales. Their heartbeat thudded heavily through the flesh and bone of your hands, and you distantly noted that their accent sounded a lot like Xisuma’s.

Wait.

Glancing up through teary eyes (when had you started crying?), your gaze met smooth metal and glass, a familiar dark gaze, brows drawn heavy over his eyes into a concerned scowl.

Ah. That… makes more sense.

Distantly, you noted that Xisuma had very long eyelashes.

When you didn’t seem like you were about to pass out from hyperventilation, you removed your hands from where Xisuma had placed them on his chest, curling into yourself to appear smaller as you noted just how close together you were.

“I’m sorry,” you tried again, wiping away the few tears that had escaped from your eyes with shaking hands. “Didn’t know it was you.”

“Don’t apologize,” he responded almost immediately. It took the gentle squeeze of his hands for you to realize that he was holding your shoulders- not tightly, but enough so that warmth seeped through his gloves. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Hunching your shoulders, you desperately searched for any indication of his mood as he drew back- a clenched hand, stiff shoulders, anything, but the admin’s every movement was slow and nonthreatening. Controlled.

“I just wanted to check on you since none of the other Hermits have seen you since the start of the server. I’m sorry for scaring you so badly.”

A flicker of surprise flashed across your features before you schooled them into a scowl once more. “Yeah, well, maybe don’t fucking sneak up on me next time.”

Xisuma huffed a laugh. It didn’t sound amused. “I guess I deserved that.”

You eyed him then, screwing your lips into a deep frown as your gaze jumped from his mask, to his hands, to his mask again. After a moment, you abruptly exhaled and stood up, dusting off some of the dirt that had stuck to your armor.

“Alright, well, I’ve got work to do, so…”

He stared at you for a moment (and you could practically picture the dial-up noises his brain was making) before scrambling to his feet as well. 

“Wait- wait! Uh, is there- do you have panic attacks often?”

Your posture, which you hadn’t realized had relaxed somewhat, tensed once more. “What’s it to you?”

Xisuma stooped to pick up the breastplate he had taken off to help you, hastily affixing it to his frame before answering your terse question. He seemed uncharacteristically sheepish, running a gloved hand over the smooth dome of his helmet in what you assumed was a nervous tic.

“It’s important to me to be aware of people’s needs, being an admin ‘n all. Panic attacks are part of that, so I remember what triggers they have.”

Against your will, both of your eyebrows quirked up. It would be so, so easy for him to be saying that just to use your ‘triggers’ (weaknesses) against you. Hell- you had gone through this song and dance so often you could do it with your eyes closed. 

It’s too simple to get attached to someone when they said all the right things, easier so when they knew what they were, knew you, planned to string you along like a wooden marionette…

But, you had lived with a very good liar. Lied yourself. And Xisuma? You hadn’t known him very long, but some long-buried part of you recognized his sincerity and ached.

The knowledge hurt, stung more than when you had dove into the ocean with a couple arrows still stuck in you, but he wouldn’t use this against you.

Xisuma took your thoughtful silence as a negative, backpedaling quickly. “Of course, you don’t have to tell me, you’ve barely even met me. Sorry for being pushy, I’ll just take my leave-”

“I don’t like surprises,” you said, interrupting him cooly. “I don’t like TNT, rockets… loud sounds in general are pretty shit- and that includes yelling. Green, too, but that’s mostly bright green. On bad days I can’t really stand it at all. And… I don’t like not seeing people’s faces. Stresses me out.”

He seemed too shocked to speak, the muscles of his throat working for a moment as if he was opening and closing his jaw, before exhaling deeply. The sound was relieved, if a little breathy. “Great. Well, not great, but- y’know. Thank you. For telling me.”

You huffed, stuffing your buzzing nerves deep, deep down. “Yeah, yeah. Keep it moving, I’ve got work to do.”

Suffice it to say, you see a lot more of a certain masked admin after that. (Not him, never him, but the change isn’t entirely unwelcome)

It irked you at first, having to contend with visits that reminded you a little too much of better worse times, an unfeeling porcelain mask and raised voices in dark rooms; being watched, kept pliant and tucked out of the way. But Xisuma’s presence once you got past his appearance was so, so much different.

Dream had always reminded you of the ocean, stormy and beautiful and alluringly dangerous. The comparison was even more so fitting once you had gotten past his mask- not his real one, but the facade of friendliness- and realized that he was as deadly as a riptide current.

If Dream was the ocean, then Xisuma was the endless night sky, constant and comforting. He never pushed you to talk during his visits, never toed the line of your boundaries or asked why you couldn’t talk about certain things or couldn’t listen to certain songs. It was almost as if he didn’t want anything from you- which, of course, was total bullshit, but the thought was nice anyway.

Against your better judgement, you could almost call him a friend.

The two of you were sitting on your porch one evening when you finally worked up the urge to ask the question that had been tearing at the back of your mind, watching as the eggshell blue sky slowly bled and burst into a riot of orange and pink.

“Why are you doing this?”

Xisuma looked up at you, the side of his helmet brushing against your legs from where he was propped up against the siding. “Hm?”

You gestured vaguely with a hand, cheeks heating slightly. 

“Y’know, visiting ‘n all? I thought it was to- to watch me like D-” your voice failed, and you cleared your throat awkwardly before you went on. “Like he did. But, uh, you’ve been around for a while and you haven’t made any moves, so… what’s up?”

He stared at you for a moment, silent, and you hastily looked away from his face, picking at the material of your pants. They were some kind of super-durable fabric that Impulse had given to you for helping him with his Redstone farm, and the sheer amount of pockets sewed into it had quickly made it the favorite pair you owned.

With Xisuma’s gentle coaxing, you had gradually began to interact more with the Hermits. It wasn’t anything too major, just helping them out with a few things here or there in exchange for payment. You knew business, understood it, so your dealings with them were easier to manage than any other social situation- or, Prime forbid, a festival.

The admin finally seemed to find his voice after a moment, turning fully to face you this time as he spoke. “Did you think think I was only here to- did you think I was guarding you?”

You shrugged, trying to keep the movement as nonchalant as possible. “I mean, it’s not like it hasn’t happened before.”

“Fuck,” he breathed, the curse tinged with a disbelieving sort of amusement.

A laugh tore itself out of your lungs. “Hels, X, I didn’t even know you could curse. Seems like your pristine reputation isn’t all that it’s made out to be, hm?”

He chuckled along with you, and, against your permission, you felt your muscles relax at the sound. Fucking- damn him. Damn him and his ability to make you feel safe, secure. Loved.

“I don’t know where you got that idea from. It’s not like I’m a nun,” he said, a grin curling the edges of his voice into something sunshine-soft, even as swathes of darkness cut across the sky above your heads. 

You rolled your eyes. “I dunno, with you I can never be quite sure.”

He was silent again, the two of you watching as stars flared and blinked into existence one by one. So silent, in fact, that when his hand slid up your calf you jolted.

“I would never- you know I could never be like Dream, right? Gods- I would never forgive myself for doing a fraction of the things he did.”

Inhaling sharply at the mention of the man who had broken your heart, broken you, you squeezed your eyes shut tightly before tears could begin to well up. “Yeah. Yeah, I know.”

Xisuma squeezed your leg comfortingly, and you could feel him shift closer until he was almost fully leaning against you.

“I love you.”

This time, you let the tears slip down your face.

Maybe you didn’t deserve a new start. Maybe it was too difficult, would take too much energy to get back on your feet again after being held down for so long.

But, if you could have this, then you wouldn’t mind giving it your best shot.

[shepard-ram]

Sleepy Hermit Headcanons

Fluff, No one asked for this but I will still present my daydreaming, no I'm not touch starved what are y'all talking about also thank you to the discord when I asked who to add, only to name like half of the whitelist. There are many more I want to be soft with in the hopefully near future so this is probably just a part one

Includes: Grian, Bdubs, Doc, Ren, Xisuma (Seprate)

Grian---

Aprently macaws sleep for 12 hours so yeah, goodluck waking up early with a bird boy resting after a day filled with heavy lifting

Will lay on top of you solely to make you completely disappear under his wings like a gaint colorful blanket

You can tell when he's finally waking up because he'll start nuzzling into you while making a bunch of chirping noises

It's adorable but dammit you woke up like three hours ago can you please move-

You've gotten into the habit of smoothing over his hair and feathers while waiting

Which, you can guess from the louder chirping that he enjoys it

Bdubs---

Goodluck having any sort of inconsistent sleep schedule, it might as well be a competitive sport with him

No matter what you're doing the minute the sun's touches the horizon you're gonna get dragged to the softest bed ever rather you want it or not

Uses you as pillow, it's impossible to get up without waking him up. Wake him up and you're being clung to and begged to go back to sleep

In the morning he's almost always awake before you. So you wake up with the positions switched, your head on his chest

He's still trying to keep you asleep as long as possible, at least you've gotten a proper night's rest

Doc---

It was a little awkward at first, metal arm, centaur body and all. But you found out how to make things work

Loves curling around you, crushing you into his chest, pressing your face into his furr, the whole thing

He's always making sure the blanket keeps the cold metal off your skin. You don't really mind it but he keeps doing it anyways

He hisses alot in his sleep, and if your crash course in creeper behavior served you right it's his equivalent of purring. It's sweet to think he feels that safe and relaxed with you

Being squished against his chest also means you can hear the soft tick of cybernetics alongside his heartbeat

Ren---

Part two of how in the world is it this comfort to cuddle with you you're like half metal-

You've woken up in some really weird positions to avoid the ol' steel pillow his chest and arm are

He's on the colder side, loves to bury his face in your neck. Not ideal (for you lol) during the winter, but at least he likes using you as a hot water bottle

Okay this was inevitable, ear scratches the puppy loves them. Will fight sleep just to keep enjoying the sritches

Talks in his sleep alot, the amount of storylines you've pieced together from his broken dialog is incredible

Xisuma---

Very half and half with who drags who away for some well deserved rest. At this point you might as well start keeping score

If you're the one getting him to bed then you often have to remind him that armor probably isn't the most comfortable pajamas for either of you-

If he's the one to get you in bed then he likes to mess with your hair as you drift off. That and little kisses. You of course return the gesture when it's you putting him to sleep

Has tried to get you to sleep with a group of axolotls. It was an... interesting experience. Napping in a pond isn't exactly your speed

Mornings are really sweet though, you'll both spend a while together chatting about the upcoming day while dozing off, the colder it is the longer it takes for either of you to get up

[womburt]

That mumbo one was so sweet! I love it so much!!! If possible I'd like to request something sweet with Xisuma

Stargazing; C. Xisuma x Reader

I would love literally nothing more than to write Xisuma fluff!! >:-) Fun fact! I wrote an entirely different story for this request, decided it wasn’t soft enough, and wrote this instead! So now I have a second fic I can publish another day lol

Anyway, hope this one is sweet enough and thank you for requesting!! :-)

-----

“Good evening Xisuma.”

The man in question nearly jumped out of his skin at their greeting. He spun around as quickly as his body would allow, coming mask-to-face with the person who surprised him.

Y/n was standing behind the admin, hands dug deep into their pockets and a nonthreatening smile on their face. They were only a few feet away, casted in moonlight that gave them a gentle glow. Xisuma thought they almost looked like a dream, the way the sky lit them up. He didn't tell them that though. 

“Evening Y/n, what brings you here?” Xisuma stood from his knelt over position, wiping imaginary dust off his pants. He turned as he did so, eventually standing to his full height. He took note of the way that their eyes followed him, seemingly observing every part of him. 

“Oh you know, I was just off to bed and saw you were still awake.” Y/n answered honestly, looking toward the direction of their own base for a moment. Xisuma looked that way as well, anything to escape the pressure of them staring at him.

Y/n knew Xisuma too well. He’d figured that out ages ago. X had never been the kind of person to lie, but he knew he could never get away with it on Y/n’s watch. They could always tell what he was thinking. When he wasn’t satisfied with a project, when he wasn’t sleeping enough. When he was embarrassed or nervous. They could read him like a book, and X still had yet to figure out how they’d come to know him so well. 

“You’ve made a lot of progress out here.” Y/n spoke again, a knowing look in their eye. Xisuma sighed as he realized why they were here.

“I have. Once I get going, it's hard to stop.” The admin admitted, reaching gloved hands up to rub his eyes, only to be intercepted by the visor of his helmet. Xisuma blushed under the headgear and returned his hands to his sides. He hadn’t thought about how long he’d been working for, but  now that it was at the forefront of his mind, X could recall it’d been sunrise when he’d initially begun. 

“Mhmm.” Y/n agreed, unyielding gaze remaining on the man. They watched him fumble with his hemet, suppressing a laugh when he struggled to reach his own face. 

“Well I can definitely see that, it looks great!” They gestured towards the wasteland, Xisuma’s buildings standing tall amidst all of the other bases at spawn. Xisuma followed their lead, admiring all his work. He took a step back and took it all in, chest swelling with pride at his work. Truthfully, in all his concentration about getting the damn thing done, he hadn’t really taken a second to enjoy the progress. 

X stepped back again, jolting when his back hit Y/n’s form. He looked toward them, raising his hands in embarrassment and also to steady himself. Y/n was already reaching out to him, their own palms on his shoulders to prevent him from misstepping and falling over. Xisuma mumbled his apologies, face turning furiously red under his helmet.

“Don’t worry ��bout it.” They shook their head at him kindly, hands moving from his shoulders to his upper arms, finally getting the man to stop fumbling around.

Xisuma, inwardly, felt like a blundering fool. His heart was beating impossibly fast at Y/n’s touch, and he was sure he was still shaking from all his nerves. X cursed himself for always getting like this when they came around. It was as if they could read him so well that he just disintegrated. Everytime they complimented him, or pointed out his success, it didn’t matter. He always ended up a blushing, stuttering mess. 

“Maybe it’s time you took a break?” Y/n suggested, though Xisuma knew he didn’t really have a choice. Nodding silently, the admin allowed himself to be pulled into his wastelands, Y/n gently holding his hand and leading the way. They showed him up the stairs into one of the buildings, and X wondered momentarily, when they’d learned the layout of his home. 

Y/n lead the way up another set of stairs inside, pausing at Xisuma’s bedroom. X was about to walk in when they pulled him away again. Creasing his eyebrows in confusion, Xisuma made no verbal disagreement, following Y/n even higher. 

Only a few moments later, Y/n had located a hole in Xisuma’s roof. “C’mon,” they encouraged, climbing up and out of the building. Who was X to decline? He pulled himself onto the roof as well. 

Y/n, who’d let go of his hand when they’d climbed onto the roof, was standing on top of the prismarine now, rustling around in their backpack. Cheering a quiet “aha!,” X saw them pull a heap of wool out, laying it over the bricks in thick layers. When they’d finished, Y/n plopped down onto the pile, satisfied with their creation.

He found himself wandering over without being prompted. Xisuma sat down next to Y/n when they patted the spot next to them, sinking into the layers of plush carpeting. Y/n had already cozied in by that point, their hair sprouting outwards in all directions.  They watched him with that same gentle smile that they were always wearing, and Xisuma figured out what they wanted. 

“Oh alright,” he muttered, tentatively reaching up to take his beloved helmet off. There was a low sound of compressed air escaping as he did so, face finally exposed to the cool night breeze. Xisuma’s hair fell in waterfalls down his back, the messy updo he’d pulled it into this morning having long since fallen apart. 

It was not the first time he’d been helmet-less in front of Y/n, but it was nerve wracking all the same. Xisuma set the helmet down beside them, but far enough out of the way that it wouldn’t interrupt his lounging. Settling into the wool again, the admin drummed his fingers on his legs nervously. 

Silently, Y/n picked up his hand again, holding it close to their chest. Xisuma tried not to vocalize how his breath caught in his throat, but somewhere deep down he knew they’d heard it. Something about the way they smiled mischievously at him made that obvious. 

Y/n rubbed their thumbs over the backside of his hand kindly, and Xisuma frowned at the leather of his gloves that existed between them. He took his hand back for a second, ripping off his gloves and setting them with his helmet. X returned his limb without a second thought, suddenly unashamed about his need for human contact. 

If Y/n noticed the change in his behavior, they didn’t say anything. Just resumed their stroking of his skin, holding it close enough to their chest that Xisuma could feel them breathe. 

“I feel like we don’t appreciate the stars as much as we should.” They spoke aloud, and Xisuma shifted to look at them.

Y/n’s eyes were trained above the both of them, looking over patterns and constellations. Xisuma followed their gaze, making out the shapes himself. It’d been so long since he’d paid attention to the night sky. After the horrors of last season, night time hadn't exactly been the most enjoyable thing for the hermits. 

He hummed his agreement, stifling a yawn soon after. Xisuma could feel that Y/n was watching him now, though he didn't look back at them. His eyes felt very heavy, and before long, he could barely keep them open.

X felt his head begin to lull, and then a gentle touch on the far side of his skull. He was pulled closer to Y/n, resting somewhere in between their chest and shoulder. Their fingers were gently combing through his hair, undoing all of the tangles that had come about during the daytime. 

Xisuma sighed at the peacefulness, leaning further into their touch. He felt himself relax into their embrace, settling into them much like a cat. 

“Goodnight Xisuma” Y/n’s voice was faint. The admin mumbled something akin to a response, but decided it must not have been a very coherent one when Y/n’s melodic giggles made their way to his ears again. He couldn’t bring himself to be flustered, too busy falling asleep to flush red. 

The admin drifted off into a much needed slumber, he could worry about being embarrassed tomorrow.

[coronation-time]

*holds clown horn threateningly* Could I request a candy maker Impulse x reader thing? To vibe check a certain person? Just- taste tester reader or just him being like “yo so I made way too many batches of candy so you get free candy, sweetheart.”

-❄️🐉

•♥•♥ “Want some Candy?”♥•♥•

✎﹏Pairings﹏: c!Impulse x Reader

✎﹏Warnings﹏: none :>

✎﹏Genre﹏: Fluff/Pre established relationship

✎﹏A/N﹏: hohoho (give me back the horn kain-) i suppose this could be considered direct violence on this certain person but i will also do my best to get the other impulse simps as well <3. (psa its been a WHILE since ive written for tumblr so this is a bit short)

You hadn't seen Impulse in a while. The self proclaimed business tycoon was locked away in the gigantic factory that he called his home. The factory was running at full speed you could only assume, the chimneys puffing out black and occasionally purple puffs of smoke. No one was allowed into the factory, not even Xisuma, his strength not a match for the netherite laid doors. Luckily you had a special way of entering the factory,

that was by breaking a window and crawling in.

Your sudden appearance, tumbling down from the window sill certainly did give Impulse a fright. He had his special ‘work goggles’ on, yellow gloves protecting his hand while his bow tie was discarded for a lab coat. His hair was a mess, sticking out as if he hadn't brushed it in a week.

“OH SWEET AETHE- Y/N? W-what are you doi- did you just break my window to get in.”

Hurriedly explaining that the factories doors were locked while brushing off a bit of glass that had gotten stuck to your wrist brace, you couldn't see the blush spread on Impulse’s face as he continued basking in your presence. Sure you might have just dropped out of nowhere (well more like fell in from his window) and your hair was all messed up, but to him you were the most beautiful being then and there. He sure was lucky to have you as his partner

“Impulse? Did I send you into a state of shock that bad? You've been staring at me for a while notthatImind-”

“Huh? Did you say something darling?” He removes his goggles, rubbing the sleep out of them, he may have been dozing off to the sound of your voice.

“Uh...nah its best if you didn't hear that. Anyways what were you working on for so long?” He sheepishly grins, gesturing to the test tubes scattered about.

“Well....I had a few orders that were still pending, so I was working on that, but after that I remembered that the first order had asked for a few batches of the same candy but then I went overboard with it and wellll I may have 32 batches of 8-packed candy stored in my closet.”

“...Impulse-” 

“I know. Want some candy?”

[frog-writes-for-fun]

I wanted to write some fluff, and got inspired with this. Don’t worry, I have more requests coming soon! Also, soft Xisuma soft Xisuma!

Just Come to Bed

c!Xisuma x Admin!Reader (romantic)

Summary: You are an admin of HermitCraft alongside Xisuma. You are generally pretty good at taking care of yourself, but your partner is easily lost in his work.

Warnings: Themes of overworking, lack of sleep, but mostly fluff.

Note: Gender neutral reader (no pronouns used, though names like "dear" and "darling" are used to refer to them). Don’t overwork yourself! Breaks are important!

Bzzzt. Bzzzt.

You jumped, looking to the edge of your desk. You picked up the buzzing communicator, hitting the button to stop the alarm. The screen went dark, a relief when compared to the light of the data screens you’d been watching all day. The job of an admin was long, but rewarding.

Reaching to the power button on your large monitor, you shut down your workstation for the night. You’d learned your lesson long ago, when a week shut up in your office had resulted in swarms of phantoms that you were too weak to take down. You smiled as you remembered the way Xisuma had stumbled outside, also half-asleep, to help you.

Thinking of your partner, you clicked on the communicator. Opening your messages with him, you sent a quick reminder.

<Y/N: Day’s over. Don’t forget to come to bed!>

<XisumaVoid: I’ll be there soon. Just finishing up.>

You sighed, shaking your head. Xisuma just always had to finish up a project or do one more check.

Pushing yourself up from your chair, you stretched, grimacing as you heard bones pop. You pushed open the door, flicking off the lights as you left. The hallways of the base were dark as you made your way to the living quarters.

You moved through your nightly routine silently, grabbing a quick meal before getting ready to sleep. By the time you made your way to the bedroom, Xisuma hadn’t come to join you. You climbed into bed and tried to fall asleep, but you began to worry about X.

You lay awake for a while before rolling over and turning on your comms. The time was late, far later than Xisuma should have come to bed even if he was working on something complicated.

You sighed as you got up. The stone of the floor was cold, and you shivered as you walked the halls to where your partner’s office was.

Light spilled from under the heavy wood of the door, and the hinges were silent as you cracked it open. You peeked in, finding Xisuma still sitting in front of several large screens, lines upon lines of code covering them.

“Hey, X?” He jumped, despite the soft tone of your voice.

When he turned in the chair to face the door, he looked slightly guilty. “Yes, love?”

“It’s late.” X winced. “You said you’d be done hours ago.”

“I know darling; this code’s just a bit more complicated than I thought.” You entered the room and crossed to Xisuma’s chair, wrapping him in a hug.

“Come to bed. The code will still be here tomorrow, and I miss you.” You nestled your face into his neck as Xisuma stood, surrounding you in his arms as he rose. “Just come to bed.”

Xisuma chuckled. “Alright beloved.” You turned to face him and rose to your tiptoes as he leaned in. Your lips met briefly before you pulled back. “What would I do without you?”

“Be swarmed by phantoms the instant you step outside,” you teased. He laughed, and after a beat you joined in. “Come on, let’s go.”

X reached over and pressed the off button on his keyboard before turning and following you out. You kept hold of his hand the whole way back to the bedroom, ensuring that he wouldn’t slip off to do more work.

Once the two of you lay down together, you wrapped your arms around Xisuma’s waist. He twisted around to face you, giving you a peck on the lips. You smiled, though it was hard to see in the near-blackness of the night. “Love you, X.”

Xisuma smiled back before leaning in for another kiss. “Love you too.”

[shepard-ram]

Yandere!Xisuma x Dsmp!Reader [Headcanons]

(Request: If requests are still open, could you please write some headcanons of Yandere Xisuma trying to gain the trust of a former member of the DreamSMP? He loves them, he wants them to feel the same, but it's so difficult when they're so used to their server admin being a puppet master.)

(Honestly I love how much of a Xisuma simp this blog has made me dhxbshsb Tw. Yandere)

From the second he learned a tiny bit about where you came from all X wanted was help. You were so skittish and on-edge, trying to leave whenever he tried to talk with you

At first he thought that's just how you were, the world you lived in was so cruel. He wouldn't hold it against you if you needed some time to warm up to him everybody

But he heard whispers about just how sweet you are, about how much more open you were being, about how thoughtful your little "thank you" gifts were

Of course on the surface he was glad to know the others were helping you get better, but he couldn't help but hold some envy

Why were you so scared of him? He's trying so hard to be there for you and you just run away only to get friendly with everyone else

He wouldn't just let you keep walking away from him like that. He cared about you, probably more than everybody combined. He would make you see how good for you he can be

He fished for as much information as he could, after all he needed to know what could possibly be making you so distant to him and him only

When he got wind of the tyrant demon that you were comparing him to, he had so many conflicted emotions

On one hand- he was livid, how dare this monster destroy someone so perfect. How dare it's impression stand between you two

On the other- he had the perfect key to help wear down that wall

Even if you didn't want him around you or your base (yet, he promised himself) he still left gifts and small notes

If you died he was always trying to be the one to deliver your inventory back to you, always sneaking in a comment about how horrifying the idea of canon lives sounded. How glad he was that war was just another name for mini-games here

When you weren't actively trying to hide from him, he practically never wanted to leave you for more than a day

The more you tell him about Dream the more he does everything he can to highlight their differences

Dream never took off his mask? Well to this day you're one of the only people X takes his helmet off around

Over some time his efforts proved successful and damn was he quick to escalate his affection. He's finally got your trust and he held onto it

He can't help but feel a tiny bit jealous. He spent all this time gaining your attention, something about someone else taking it again just sets him off

He only wants you, why can't you want him back just as much?

He can give you anything and everything, all you need to do is say so. All you need to do is stay by his side

Maybe he's not so different from Dream.

[shepard-ram]

Yandere!Hermitcraft x Reader [Headcanons]

(Not a request: my amazing anons [mostly hibiscus, dodo and honey] gave me some breadcrumbs and I am running with it.Tw. Yandere, manipulation, kidnapping etc. honestly thinking about making some poly ones)

Includes: Grian, Xisuma, Scar, Bdubs, Doc (separate)

Grian-

You were already constantly found together

Your relationship was built on carefree laughter

For a long while everything was perfect, you were practically one person

You were where he was, you talked to whoever he was talking to- it just worked

You only knew something was wrong when you started trying to branch off on your own

Sure you had your own base, projects and life, but something about you drifting away just a little more set him off

Was he not enough? Did he do something wrong?

No, you are happy with him and if you're forgetting that he has no problem reminding you

You use to spend alot of time hanging out in the hobbit hole, surely you won't mind spending a little more there

It has all you could need! All he had to do was clean it up and get rid of anything you could hurt... "yourself " with

It was easy to get you there, it was an innocent suggestion to visit the refurbished base "just like we use to"

You didn't realize your mistake until it was time to head back to your base

If you try to leave? Well you must not need him. You'll be left completely alone until you come to your senses

"It was always us! You don't need anyone else."

Xisuma-

He was immediately very protective of you when you joined the server

It made sense, you didn't know anyone so of course he'll get you on your feet!

It was sweet at first, seeing your adorable excitement to literally everything

And your fascination when he pulled up his admin screen could melt hearts

Someone so sweet should be kept safe!

Even if he logically knows the others wouldn't touch you it doesn't ease his paranoia

It's not like the hermits are 100% innocent, and the server is bound to be filled with dangerous machines and not so safe pranks

That's what he tells you as much as himself, as well as how sad he'd be if you leave

He hates that he has to guilt you into staying, but it's all for you. He doesn't want anything to happen to you

And he's not lying, he really doesn't know what he would do without you

He does his best to let you walk around his towers that made his base and let the others talk to you

That is- until you end up with even the smallest injuries, rather or not it was caused by another hermit it's his snapping point

It felt a little cleché, to be locked away in a tower like a fairy tale

He does his best to keep you happy, it breaks his heart to see you so scared of him

"Please don't be like that, you're safe here. I-I can't let anyone hurt you"

Scar-

You never really got the chance to talk before the mayoral race

That is precisely why you decided to help him and Bdubs, giving endorsement speeches and making posters

After that he never wants to leave your side, giving you a job in townhall just to keep you around

Convinces himself you were just ment to be together

He makes sure to do everything perfect

Gifts of flowers, jewlery, chocolates and notes filled with all the things he admires about you

He's very confused when you look so terrified

Doesn't process the fact that he saw your reaction through your window

He was going to give you a grand confession

That was until you came to him for comfort, spilling your worries about a stalker

You both knew he was far from physically strong, so when you came to him for safety- he is over the moon

For your stay he is so happy to express all the love that couldn't through the gifts

When you realize his compliments are way too similar he's already so far in his own head it all falls on deaf ears

He's so dependent on your presence, and he always makes sure you know how much he loves you

"Hey where are you trying to go? Get back here, I need you to sleep."

Bdubs-

He was always trying to show off to you

Always saying he enjoyed the "rivals" thing you had, rather or not you played along

It was all fun and games for you, meanwhile he was just spiraling deeper into obsession

Even with the smallest decisions he couldn't stop thinking about you, what'd you like, what'd you think

Your approval means absolutely everything

And of course you innocently fed into it, every little compliment on his outfit, every little awe filled smile at his builds

You must love everything about him just like he loves everything about you!

It's so obvious- whenever he sees you you're smiling or chuckling or mumbling to yourself, it's so clear that you think about him just as much

And since you're just as in love, surely you'll be ecstatic to see the home he made just for you

Of course you love it with! Oh, you're going back to your own base? Well how considerate you are, not wanting to bother him

It takes a while to convince you but you're just playing hard to get!

The house has everything you could ever want, and he can give you all the attention you could need

No matter what you try to do or say he keeps making excuses, you love him. And that's the end of it

No matter how you act out he acts like it's nothing

"Calm down darling, you'll feel better after a nap. We can cuddle!"

Doc-

You weren't very close, but that didn't stop an infatuation from forming

Maybe that was part of it, you were just far enough away for it feel like a challenge

And boy is he always up for a challenge

He is made of patient dedication, you are never out of his sight

Has a small shrine of pictures and trinkets he's stolen for when he can't see you properly

Probably the most self-aware, he knows how messed up this is, how messed up he is.

That doesn't stop him from making sure your soon to be home together is as comfortable as possible

Everything was ready, now all he had to do was take you. It was easy, he knew exactly where you would be and when

He actually hesitated before going through with it, after all you look so peaceful sleeping

He was careful not to wake you taking you home

He knows it'll take awhile for you to adjust, but again he's extremely patient

Until you break he's very cold, but when you (inevitably) do he trys to be the perfect partner for you

Trys, he's still very unstable, so you better not act out

"Don't look so scared. Just listen, be good and everything will be okay."

[shepard-ram]

Old Habits, New Life [Xisuma & Dsmp!Reader]

(P!Hurt/comfort, Request: May I request some ✨xisuma✨? Like the reader juuust came from the dream smp and Xisuma is helping them get set up and just settling their anxiety and fear over stuff that happened in the smp that could happen on the hermit server? Like the reader is told they could build whatever they like, but what if someone comes and griefs it? Or worse, destroys it?! And why is everyone so nice?? Nobody is that nice for no reason. Oh god is that joke a threat or an actual joke? Them just wanting to stay away from everyone and not interact because that’s how they protect themselves but desperately wanting to be the hermits’ friend. Wow that got deep too quickly haha. Those are just some ideas for it. Take it wherever you like. - 🦤)

(You either wait 3 weeks or 3 days for your request to be finished I'm sorry, also this focuses more on you than X and yours friendship soooo)

----------

The past week was closer to a blur than anything else. All you knew was that you had managed to escape from that place you somehow had called a home. How you got here you didn't recall, the first face you saw was hidden behind the tinted glass of a visor. You couldn't lie, you were fucking terrified of Xisuma when you first met him. Especially since your mind didn't associate "green masked admin" with the best things.

Yet first impressions can be extremely deceiving. Even in your frazzled state you could tell he was trying is absolute best to make you comfortable. Of course that didn't completely switch the gut feeling off, but every time you talked it became harder and harder to see anything bad in his intentions.

Now here you were, setting up in the area you had marked down on an already filled map. Xisuma and a few others had gifted you a couple things to help you get up to speed, you were hesitant to take them. Even though they gave you them like it was nothing you couldn't help but stare at the items in awe.

Full netherite armor and tools, including two separate pickaxes, enchanted to perfection. The only piece missing from the set was the chest plate, and it was replaced with something you had only heard of. Elytra, a pair of pale purple wings with strong leather straps. There were rocket's without any of the dangerous additions you were so use to seeing in them. And golden carrots, you had seen a few of them eating the brewing ingredient like it was nothing- was it really their staple food? And to top it all off, they were delivered in a purple box, the type you had seen your people kill over. You didn't trust it.

You almost flat out refused it under the guise of wanting to work of them yourself, surely this was some "you owe me" plot. An act of kindness and hospitality only to be revealed as an IOU. when bad turns worse, but X stood by your side and promised that there was no scheming under the gift. As much as your heart screamed in disagreement you took his word. You didn't want to get attached to an object, but that night you couldn't help but carve names into your items. A simple "my first" was hidden on the inner lid of the shulker box.

In a few days you had a base. It wasn't ment to look good, it was purely functional. A birch house with enough room for a bed, ender chest, crafting table and what ever necessities you could deal with losing. All under a flat roof only there to keep your bed dry. Your home had been destroyed time and time again, so you didn't build something worth destroying.

You didn't think about it, it was second nature. You kept the shulker box in your ender chest, you stayed tucked away, you made sure you knew the area. It was autopilot, stay out of sight and be prepared for the worst case scenario. That's just how it went.

Yet you felt so- off. Sure comfort was limited back there, but you still had friends. You had to be extremely careful with who you showed weakness, but you still did to a few. X was the only person you knew as being on good terms with. You couldn't help to think how easily that could change. You've seen it happen more times than you could count.

But almost every day he would visit, despite his personal projects and admin duties. Sometimes with lunch, sometimes just to talk. As much as you wanted to stay out of sight you knew you couldn't live completely alone. Over time you felt less and less like you were walking on eggshells. Maybe even comfortable- it was slow, but no one was pushing you and you felt better.

Days turned to weeks and you knew you felt different. Jokes stopped feeling threatening, compliments didn't feel as backhanded. Even while specks of anxiety still clung to your mind you didn't hold back your social needs. You could even call a few hermits friends without hesitating.

You remodeld your shack, a non-flat roof and stained glass windows. It was bigger with more commodities than the box you started with. There were other buildings too, covering proper storage, super smelters and a small villager hall. Compared to your newer peers it wasn't outstanding by any means. Yet it was so much more than you ever thought you would have.

Yet possibly your favorite corner of the server? Your own tiny shop. You didn't have much to sell, but it was an emotional triumph. You didn't fear that the payment you did get would be stolen. You even left your first shulker box in there for an entire day and only panicked a moderate amount when you realized you left it there. It felt like you had killed your own dragon.

Yes things were different here, but as long as you had some new friends walking with you you knew you wouldn't feel so lost. Maybe you would try to show some of your old friends what you had learned, but that was another chapter of your life. You were a hermit now, and you wouldn't trade them for the world.

[shepard-ram]

New Day Brings New Faces [Hc!Reader & Tommy, Tubbo, Ranboo]

(Mostly P!fluff, Request: I am that person who will request a part 2 for your fic- I am a sucker for these kinds of things and that fic was a hella good pick me up, thank you-

-🍯)

(I haven't been able to stop thinking about scenarios I am so happy to provide more crossover comfort. I am totally down to make this a full series. And the hermits are actually here this time!)

[Part 1 -Ambassadors Work]

[End Busting -side episode]

----------

You woke up stiff and lightly shaken, literally someone was gently shaking you. When you fully opened your eyes you met three faces. Your admin, mayor and his right hand shared the same confused, slightly worried expression. You glanced around looking for their source of concern, looking at your lap and- oh, oh yeah.

Your mind helpfully recalled the events of the previous day. It was Ranboo who had his head in your lap, barely an inch way Tommy and Tubbo layed next to you two. The three boys still fast asleep. With a quick glance at the sun you knew you had barley been asleep for an hour.

"I'm sure you have alot to say." Xisuma had finally said something after seeing you had collected your thoughts.

"Yeah, I do." Chuckling, still in a sleep clogged voice. "Please don't wake them up." You quickly added in a more hushed voice. "They deserve some rest." That didn't help their confusion, until you had explained why you had taken the boys with you.

"Was it really that bad?." Scar had asked after your summary. They shared a similar look to the one you wore when you realized how awful that place was.

"Yes it was." When you remembered something. You handed them the book with all the things you had learned over your visit. "I was given a tour, that has more than I can think of now." Letting out a yawn, already dozing back off.

"I know that things like this are decided by the whole server, but can you please let them stay for at least a little while." You made your request In the most sincere tone you could manage. "When they wake up I was planning on taking them to my base. Let them wash up, maybe get some clean clothes and a proper meal- and just take it easy before meeting some of the others."

"I don't see why they wouldn't let them stay." Bdubs responded. That made you smile. "But you should probably wake them up, surely someone will pass by soon." You nodded, beginning to slowly nudge them awake.

"Should we go?" Scar asked.

"No, they should meet you guys." He nodded sitting on the railing of the stairs. You watched the three groan from both the early awakening and the non-ideal bed they had been on. As soon as they saw the three unknown hermits they almost jumped back in various versions of shock. Tommy specifically looked like he had gone to draw a weapon had they been able to tavel through worlds. You hushed them standing up to introduce your friends, "Good morning boys" you started in a soft voice trying to keep them calm.

"Who are they?" Ranboo spoke first, he had been the least startled from the beginning.

"A few of my friends, Xisuma, Scar and Bdubs." You pointed to each of them as you spoke.

"Oh Scar and Bdubs? We were told about you" Tubbo said smiling towards you.

"Really?" Scar grinned.

"Yeah we got a history lesson" Ranboo explained before turning to X. "I don't think you were mentioned though"

"You didn't tell them about our admin?" Bdubs teased. Before you could make a retort Tommy fully got up, breathing much too quickly.

"Admin?" Making the connection in your head you rushed to his side. Trying to get him out of his frazzled state.

"Hey, trust me he's nothing like dream, -here breath" you guided Tommy back to the ground Tubbo placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. Xisuma hesitantly kneeled in front of the teen.

"I was told a little about your home, I don't want to scare you." His efforts seemed to reach him, "If there's something I can do to make you more comfortable please tell me" Tommy nodded full exceptance marked with him putting out his hand, which X met with a smile and handshake. From there the two sets of three properly introduce themselves to each other. You felt a soft, warm pride wrap your heart watching them get along.

As the Hermit trio left to start the days work you told them the day you had planned, opening a nearby ender chest to retrieve some elytras. They watched in fascination as you produced four identical sets, along with enough rocket's to get you all to your base.

Tubbo seemed off-put as you strapped on your wings, "Do we have to fly?"

"The server's pretty big, it's pretty much a necessity."

"Oh, okay- I just" seeing him worryingly eye your rocket's you offered an alternative.

"you know we probably don't have enough time to teach you how to fly right now, and we aren't running on full sleep." You reasoned, "There's a nether tunnel can take. Completely enclosed, no flying needed- only an optional boat."

"Boat?" You smiled already leading them toward the nearest portal.

By the time you had reached the portal that connected to your base the boats you had used were dented and marked from basically being used as bumper carts. The four of you stumbled through the portal still laughing about the race you had took on the way there.

"Here I'll get you guys some food then we'll get some proper sleep." A yawn marked your proposal. They let out varying levels of enthusiasm while taking seats on the coaches and armchairs that filled this part of your base. "When we wake up I'll get you actual beds." You promised.

Yet when you returned with some golden carrots and steak they were already passed out on the spot. You didn't fight the tired smile that formed, going to get them some blankets. You set the food on a nearby table before heading to your own bed. Despite the bright, almost noon sun outside the window, you knew you wouldn't have any trouble sleeping. With a few ideas of what to do and what to show them, you let familiar comfort take you back to rest.

[shepard-ram]

An Outside Perspective [Xisuma & Dsmp!Reader]

(P!Fluff? Hurt/comfort? Not really sure lol Request: Could I request a reader insert were the reader is causally talking about the wars and bloodshed they have seen on the dream smp to Grian or Xisuma?)

(After the Grian headcanons I'm so happy to be getting more hermitcraft requests! Tw. Talk of past war, violence, death etc. Also thank you dodo anon for some ideas.)

----------

Somehow you had managed to slip away from the Dream smp and found yourself in a much more peaceful server, Hermitcraft. Most of them knew vaguely of the wars that constantly held your home, but no one seemed to fully grasp what you had became so accustomed to. Not that you were trying to hide anything, it just never came up. Until you found yourself talking to a masked admin much kinder than your own.

You were helping Xisuma as he worked on a new tower in his base. You had been staying in the server for awhile now, and had hung around X since the start. At first it was because you thought getting on an admins good side would be a good strategic move, but now it was because you genuinely enjoyed his company.

At first it was unnerving how... not violent the hermits were. Even though you had grown used to how kind every one was, you still couldn't deny how intimidating some of the hermits looked. Including Xisuma's heavy armor and helmet that he never seemed to take off. You've been curious about it since the start, so you finally decided to ask.

"Hey X, can I ask you something?" Watching as he perked up at his name.

"Uh... sure!"

"Why do you never take off that helmet? I get if it's personal- I'm just curious."

"Oh- well at first it was a medical thing. Now I just wear it for comfort, especially since I have some scars I'd rather keep hidden." He added the last part in a slightly weaker voice.

"Oh I get that! I've got quite a few myself!" You rolled up your sleeve to show off the burn like scar that marred the skin running all up your left arm, ending just above your wrist. The mark was much darker than a normal burn would be, it was from a wither effect.

Even through his purple visor you could see Xisuma's eyes grow wide with what you assumed was concern.

"How in the world did you get that?" His tone confirmed that you were right about his expression.

"It's a long story, but back in the Dream smp I lived in this country called L'Manberg. After an election the first president and vice president were forced to leave. Eventually they and a few other of their allies tried to take it back- or destroy it I'm not entirely sure-" you told the war story in such a causal way it felt like you were reciting the plot of a show you had watched the other day. Not even paying attention as X's face worsened.

"Anyways, during that take over one of the old presidents allies spawned two withers as a show of strength. I got caught up in the blast zone, and... here we are!" You jestered to the blackened scar in pride.

"Really? How badly messed up were you?" The wither scar looked like the entire left side of your body was almost blown off, yet you seemed as bright and strong as anyone else.

"Oh I was knocked off my feet, but I just got up and ran! It takes a lot more than one missed blast to keep me down. After the day was out though I could barely move my arm, I still try to keep too much strain off it." You added casually rolling your sleeve back down.

"Was that the only battle you've been through?" He asked with what could only be described as worried hope.

"Oh not by a long shot!" If you had been looking you would have gotten a laugh at his face. "There was L'Manbergs war of Independence, died quite a few times there, Pogtopia vs. Manberg, that's where I got that scar- and Doomsday, god I thought two withers was excessive ha! If I could've known."

"What! You went through all that! You're only like, twenty, why would someone that young be put through all that" You realized just how horrified he was. Switching to a more somber tone.

"Oh I am not that young compared to some of the others." Watching as his face dropped you continued. "The vice president? That got exiled, Tommy. He's sixteen." You thought you might have broke the admin at that point. "Seemed Dream always had it out for the poor kid. I tried to help him as much as I could, but there's not much you can do against a tyrant god."

"I- I just-" you could see him trying to process everything you'd just spilled. He settled on resting his hand on your shoulder, "you know you can stay here as long as you want. Maybe even bring some of your friends for a little visit?" You weren't entirely sure if that was a question or a statement, but you answered with a sincere nod.

"Thank you."

"Of course, don't think about it." You both turned back to the half finished tower. Xisuma had some things to discuss with the others later, but that could wait for now.