#can we at least acknowledge someone else's problems for once?

[astonmartingf]

FALLING FOR YOU ; MV1

max verstappen x reader

. . . in his own little way, max finds the solutions to his problems not without a little help from his friends and ends up giving you the confession of a lifetime

amgf yeah... there's this, just fluff. i won't be as active this week because of exams and research but this is prime time of my impulsive ideas so either i can milk this opportunity to write every single day, or avoid this app for the remainder of the week. enjoy 👍

Max strives for stability. 

He enjoys the same routine that consists of jogging at eight am, early morning workout by nine am, brunch, a few rounds of sim racing, stopping by for a few phone calls and online meetings. If he isn’t expected to fly anywhere else he’d have his usual afternoon snack, play with his cats, more sim racing from six to eight pm, dinner with his team, reviewing data and notes, an hour for his own leisure— mostly sim racing, before heading to bed at one am.

Whatever happens in between is usually one of Lando’s plans in an attempt to spice things up in his life. Whether it’s going to the movies, buying ice cream at the convenience store down the street, or playing padel. Max is very much thankful for his friends.

Max also strives for the best.

He takes pride in his skills in racing and acknowledges his talent, and flaws. Honing them like a sharp knife through whetstones, he polishes himself and cuts through the defenses of the grid. He is a World Champion for a reason, and with a great car and team behind him, he knows they’ll get far. Max is very much thankful for the trust his team set upon him.

Max hates uncertainty. 

Well- hate is too strong of a word and dislike would be too weak for his opinions. 

Max despises uncertainty.

Especially when there’s you- the current root of all his “problems”. Despite his tendency to be blunt and straightforward statements, uncertainty always left a distasteful feeling in his mouth. 

Realizing that his wavering feelings for you have now shattered the routine he built to perfection. Long gone are sleeping on time and hello to staying up with you crowding his thoughts. Head full of the lingering scent of your perfume and the same voice playing in his head.

Max hated it. He despised how you orbit around his mind, bouncing through the walls of the gray matter inside his skull. He often catches himself smiling at the thought of you- before a bitter scowl fills his face and an incredulous and slightly constipated look pasted on his face.

But that was the least of his worries, such feelings could be fixed (a term he used to convince himself these are temporary). It’s not that Max doesn’t believe in relationships or think it’s nothing but a distraction, deep inside he’s aware that he craves affection. It’s the vague emotions clouding his heart making him think twice.

Then again, Max is thankful for his friends. 

“What did you say?” Lando squinted his eyes in the hopes to hear his words clearly. With a blank look- almost as if he put on a mask void of emotions Max spoke once more.

“Do I like YN?” 

The rest tilted their head to the side, in confusion. “D-did you perhaps ask us. . . if- if you like someone?” George, asked once more to make sure of his words, sighing in disbelief.

“It’s not just someone, it’s YN.” Max pushed the question once more and glanced at everyone on the table.

The silence was deafening. Max’ statement was too loud and too quiet at the same time, no one spoke and they left each other contemplating on the next words he will say.

“I need help. How do I know I like YN?” Collective gasps were heard throughout and one by one they slowly left the group of friends on the table leaving Max with Lando and George.

“How about we sleep over your question and. . .think— think about it you know?” Lando, the first to talk regarding the revelation that their stoic friend has now developed feelings for someone.

“Sleep? I hardly get any sleep these nights. I want to confirm my feelings now so I can finally sleep peacefully.” 

That’s when the pair noticed the bags under his eyes, mostly due to the lack of sleep like he said. Lando took a glance at George and started to talk telepathically at each other.

George sighs before pushing Max from his seat, “You see Max these feelings can’t be confirmed in a night, these requ-”

“It’s been weeks, George, I can’t lose sleep over such a trivial matter.” Max retorted with a firm stance using his lack of sleep as a front to confirm his feelings.

“Okay, first of all feelings are not a trivial matter. They are valid, and whatever is going on in your head about YN shouldn’t be taken lightly. Not because we’re curious but because we care about your emotional well being.” Lando spoke in a serious voice which only added on to Max’ confusion.

Feelings are not a big deal, at least not for him.

“And we're curious as to why you like YN.” George chimed as he followed the pair outside the room.

“Yes we’re curious but now how about I give you some romance books that you can study and read. Only you can confirm your feelings Max, let’s stop by my room and I’ll give you books you can read and next week- next week we’ll talk about this matter again.”

Lando now sounds like a mom scolding his child for misbehaving, dragging the latter to his room and sending him off with a tower of romance books.

Max is smart, he can understand such concepts by himself.

Feeling accomplished, Lando glanced at George smirking at him before walking away with Max to his apartment.

Max on the other hand went inside his room and began to bury himself in the books he brought along. “If I’m not sleeping at least I get my feelings in line.”

One chapter. And another turns to five and in the blink of an eye a week has passed. Max returned to his routine but instead of sleeping at one he pushed it to an even later hour to make time for reading which helped him sleep.

The first nights were hard, after finishing a chapter of the book he finds himself falling asleep and now you appear to become more vivid in his mind. Invading his dreams as romantic scenarios play on repeat while Max mindlessly sleeps which results in him waking up flustered and warm.

Passing by you on the paddock became frequent; it's as if the universe has its way to bring you together. Now everywhere Max looked there was you, in the corner of his sight you occupied a chunk of his thoughts and as much as he hated to admit he found himself anticipating your presence.

By the end of the week you managed to invade his thoughts and heart which only strengthened his theory and confirmed his feelings for you. With no time to waste, Max went to look for you. The second practice was over, he’s telling you what you’re doing to him.

With new found information from the team about your whereabouts, Max made his way to the hospitality locating where you’re assigned he opens the door abruptly to see you preparing food. You stand straight feeling the intimidating aura around him, you watch him exhale a sigh of relief before talking a large step in your direction. On instinct you back away giving him space, every step Max takes is a step backward from you.

Unknowingly your feet hit the corner of the marble countertop and like a cliché scene Max remembers from the books he’s been reading you stumble backwards.

Max is a racer for a reason, and with swift reflexes he managed to catch your fall and brought you up to your feet. “You should watch where you’re going. I don’t want you falling just like how I fell for you.”

Silence. Complete, utter silence from the both of you paired with the low buzz of the booming air conditioner right near you. You blink your eyes incredulously, “What?”

“I mean. . . I do want you to fall for me, it would be sad to find out that my feelings are one-sided. But I mean my words YN.”

You adjust your posture and back away. “What are the words Max? About me falling to the ground or you. . . you f- falling for me?” Your voice thins out at the end unsure of what you just heard.

“Both. I don’t want you to fall, it’s dangerous just like how you did to me. You enamored me with those charms, I just want to know how you did it.” Max spoke with the most bored and plain looking face he could muster up. His palms were sweating inside his pockets in extreme nervousness.

“Is this- is this your confession perhaps?” You try to piece things together, like the subtle clues Lando and George have been leaving out of nowhere.

“Yes. This is my confession.” Max blurts out as sweat drips from the side of his forehead. And just as he was losing hope from this failed confession your bubbly laugh bursts the silence in the air.

“You know, you need to work on your confession more. That was unlike any other, but I understand what you mean. Do you want me to fall for you, Maxie?” 

Max stares at you and you don't miss the soft gaze he set upon you. You note the light blush spread around the apples of his cheeks as his eyes light up the moment you called his name. The once awkward silent air was now filled with a warm feeling that spread all over your body, leaving goosebumps all over your skin.

“I do. I fell for you, I like you, and I want to mean something to you.”

His way with words caught you off guard, Max Verstappen, who would’ve thought. You smile at him, this time it’s you walking towards his direction.

Max stiffened at the proximity between the two of you, his feet stuck to the floor preventing him from backing away. Your face gets closer to his and all the thoughts clouding his mind have been wiped away.

You face him and whisper something in his ear before walking away towards the kitchen at the back, legs shaking and breaths heavy. 

Taking a moment to himself Max meditates in an attempt to calm his bouncing heart, legs shaking as if they ran a hundred miles, and his mind whirring into different ideas and possibilities.

Max never falls- literally and figuratively.

Yet you managed to be the root of all his problems. The person who made him fall, there was no doubt that Max fell and will still be falling for you.

[justatalkingface]

Making Izuku Worse, But BETTER

*walks in* *drops post* *explains nothing* *leaves*

So, a while ago, I made a post talking about how, among (many, many) other things wrong with how Izuku was developed over the story, that his fundamental character was just... slowly and systematically chipped away by Hori, until his unique personality was gone, and all that was left is a shell of a shonen protagonist.

Well. I'm here today to tell you that... fuck. I can do that shit better than Hori did.

Here's my revolutionary idea: lean into it. See, while he's growing in a bad direction, while as a person he's getting worse in a lot of ways, that isn't bad, as, like, character development, or as part of a story.

So. The thing is, while Izuku changes, it's never really... acknowledged in the story. (This is, of course, a different part of his problem, that while he changes throughout the story, by and by large his improvement, how far he's come, and what he's done, is never acknowledged; in fact, he's actively criticized for not doing everything perfectly, because of course.) Because Izuku is, over all, improving, that means he never gets validation for his work... but, flipping it, with this? He never gets it pointed out that he's doing worse.

And it doesn't even need to be a person, is the thing; you can have it never directly told to Izuku, but shown to us, the viewers, in story, and that's fine, as long as it's acknowledged.

So, the first thing I'd do, to make this whole idea work right is... actually spend more time on Izuku's quirks as a character. He's smart, curious, enthusiastic, mildly obsessed with Quirks, and look! Here he has a Quirk. There's no possible way to work with that, right?

Start there. Show, at the very least, one panel scenes of Izuku... geeking out. Experimenting. Being Izuku, basiclly, and scatter them every once and awhile in the story. Maybe have him suggest something to someone else, show that person's improvement under his guidance (and, you know, have Izuku interact with other human beings... as a human being. Yet another problem Hori has with Izuku; as far as we can tell from what we are shown, he is strangers with his entire damn class, even though the story has tried to push the vibe that he is, in fact, friends with all of them. And don't get me started on his mother, who barely even exists...).

It doesn't have to be big, is the thing, or elaborate, it just has to be there, to help firmly establish these characteristics in our minds as readers. And that's important, because that means it'll be noticeable when it stops.

Ideally, I'd think it'd be best to do this post-Kamino, because it's such a big thing that Izuku having a radical change in response makes sense. All Might's gone, the mantle is his now... no pressure, right? And, in the same way the foundational aspects were set up, it can start small: those few scattered panels? They're gone.

*ratchet sound effect*

It's not something pointed out or anything, they're just... gone. Maybe replace them with more training, maybe not, but we don't see Izuku spending his free time being Izuku anymore, and that's it. It stays at that new normal for awhile.

Then the stress kicks up a gear; conveniently, after Kamino we have... *sigh*. I can't believe I'm saying this, but conveniently, we have Sir Nighteye. And the thing is? Sir Nighteye is an asshole; he's perfect for just.... bringing the stress up just an extra notch. And here's where more work has to be put in to sell this idea, not just showing less happy Izuku, but showing more upset Izuku, showing how things are getting to him, not just in the moment, but consistently, even when nothing is actually happening to him at that exact point in time. A scene of Izuku... head in his hands, maybe. Training, and pushing farther than he should, and maybe there's something bleeding. Not a lot, not yet, but the cracks should be showing at this point.

*ratchet sound effect*

For the purposes of this, we'll assume that by and by large the story is happening as usual, so Mirio loses his Quirk, and there's that guilt, hitting Izuku like a truck.

*ratchet sound effect*

Show those stress scenes just a little more now, work in some conversations with Mirio where he acts happy, but the second he walks away everything crashes down on him; you don't even need to have anyone saying anything, just the visual of his smile vanishing in an instant will carry it.

Because if I'm writing this I'd want her to be a character, show Izuku's mom slowly growing worried as they meet (with her actually being more of a character at all before hand; show her growing happier and less burdened as Izuku improves before all of this, only now they see each other less and less, and every time he seems less happy than he was before, grimmer).

After that, just let things bake for awhile; nothing really changes, Izuku is just more miserable, and people are slowly starting to notice that he's acting different now, even if they don't really understand why...

And then Joint Training. Fun fact: canonly, the Vestiges, as introduced to us? Are assholes; which, honestly, isn't that surprising, because just about everyone is an asshole to Izuku! Stress Factor 5975 that is never really acknowledged in story: some asshole yelling at Izuku for instantly failing at his Quirk because he had no idea how to even use it, much less that it was even there, much less that it would happen in the middle of a fucking training exercise.

*ratchet noise*

And then, important moment here, have someone.... All Might, Ochako, whoever, notice that Izuku is getting a new Quirk (...or developing a new facet of his Quirk, or however that was explained to everyone), but he isn't enthusiastic about it. There's no brainstorming, no experimenting... this thing that should have been a source of joy is just.... there. At worst, it is actively causing him stress. And it this obvious difference that is ringing some warning bells in people's minds.

*ratchet noise*

So, all this time, along with all the story points that are supposed to be happening, from Kamino on I've been slowly weaving together a new one: Izuku increasingly barely holding his shit together in the face of his clusterfuck of a life. Then the War Arc kicks in, and that's where the pay off for all this slow build, because here's where everything goes to shit.

War Arc hits Izuku like a train, and leaves him wrecked in the aftermath, absolutely destroyed... which, organically, leads into the Dark Deku arc, only here, we actually do it better.

Here, him going 'rogue', is an organic evolution of various things that have been going on for probably years now, Izuku slowly depriving himself of all things that gave him joy, in favor of training for his Mission, TM, this Grand Purpose that was thrust upon him.

Here, his classmates going to save him makes more sense because we've seen them interact, we've seen their growing concern over how he's been changing.

All of these things happen, and come together for this moment where the story finally admits what it's been dancing around all this time: Izuku is not OK. And at last, finally, starts to actually resolve it.

[sharonisthebettercarter]

Well the comics did a good job squandering any sympathy and shiz for dicklander, and the show too. I only feel bad for his child self. His grown ass can get attacked by rabid kryptonian dogs for all I care.

i disagree.

and look, i ain't gonna tell you how to feel boo, i can't obviously. i can only spew out nonsense and hope i might reach you or someone else who comes along to read my long winded bullshit.

but while both renditions are pieces of shit, i feel so much for comics homie too if not more. he's even more whoobie than show homie but gets dismissed but i digress.

throughout the story, we're made to feel *suspicious* about the claims on homelander or that his story may have more than meets the eye. ennis presents it point blank. he doesn't tell the reader how to feel about homelander, or anything, or anyone. he makes it clear how billy feels, how other characters feel, but he also certainly makes it show that things aren't quite adding up about him and billy's claim. he presents the story and lets *you* the reader feel (which is what real *good* writing does)

BUT it's framed out in a way to make the reader realize he *wasn't* this big bad awful guy he was made out to be, a piece of shit sure, but and not the real monster they were after, that billy was fuckin' wrong (like his dumb ass always is), that his end and final point in the story was manipulated, coerced by outside force, and not truly justified as a result.

leik, this guy got his WHOLE LIFE fucking RUINED, his whole self image, gaslit into fucking oblivion to *believe* he was a bad guy until he *became* a bad guy, after literally never once getting a *choice* for anything, ever, at all, at any point in his whole gotdamn life.

this boi never had a chance... and even after ALL that. people STILL want to control or punish him when he lacks one major vital thing that would warrant him *actually* deserving that.

AGENCY. fucking agency, the answer is agency, homelander has none of it, never has, and still does not have it. (he pretends to but it's not quite the same, the lack of it is what makes him a ticking time bomb)

you seem like someone to really value your own agency so idk, i feel like you should get that??

BUT GOTDAMN LET THE BOI JUST FUCKING BREATHE AT LEAST ONCE PLEASE????

UGH

just try to imagine if every single choice in your life was made *for you* by *someone else*, and that's homelander. and it doesn't stop into adulthood, it just turns into a fucking fucked up conservatorship beside someone who wants to kill you, oh yeah, and stunted growth so you never get a chance to really grow up and feel like or be your own person either.

like i'm not kidding, he might as well be a child STILL in that regard and it is super fucked up how often people exploit and groom him that way. i don't care if he's fucking 16, 40, or in his 70s, the man *ain't* grown like he should be and *needs* the space to actually *grow* before we decide to fucking judge him, else we're no better than his abusers.

and when a kid commits a crime, it's the parents/guardians that are brought up on charges/trial. there is a *reason* for that.

homelander's very clear lack of sanity/mental capacity and vought being his 'guardian'/conservator?? (if he even is a real legal person...) would put him under this spectrum of bullshit, and baby i don't want to say it's ableist not to acknowledge this, but...

i mean if i'm being real, it kinda sorta is...?? wait... HOLD THE--- FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!! OH MY FUCKING SATAN--it IS!! and I JUST GOT WHIPLASH FROM WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THE BOYS FANDOM WHEN IT COMES TO HOMELANDER.

this motherfucker is *CRIMINALLY INSANE*, emphasis on that last fucking part, in every sense of the word *CLINICALLY*. and when that happens, even the fucking laws in the fucked ol' U.S. of A. DO NOT 'punish' a mofo by regular 'incarceration', they still order institutionalization but with a HOSPITAL for TREATMENT. (granted there are a whole mess of other problems in this country that still do not handle this properly jesus fucking christ--)

ABLEISM! it's fucking ableism that doesn't let fandom recognize this!! EVEN some of the people who claim to love him!!

except THEN make it WORSE on top of everything *because* of the stunted growth and vought AND limited personal agency and... fuck me... UGGGGGGHHHHHHH--

but THAT is homelander. and uh... yeah. yeah, you'd probably lose your gotdamn mind too, i don't think ANYONE could walk out sane, realistically speaking. pain is easy to say we'd walk out clean from, and then we all turn into pussies the *second* it's our turn to deal.

and the whole point of the twist is to rob you of any satisfaction of his death and make you angry at his circumstances rather than at him. again, ennis doesn't explicitly *tell* readers how to feel because it's more of a graphic novel but...

i personally think the show is aiming to recreate this effect because if they can pull it off (and manage to make an entire population feel like utter ableist shitheads for wanting him dead), then they'll be pulling off some kinda magical MAJOR amazing heist of the feels for the ages that will *hopefuly* be enough to push society in some better directions than its current state (man, we really could not have asked for a better time for this series... holy shit--)

as much as it pains me, *this* was why he was killed in the comics. not just for... ugh, sadness, realism... but because it was *part* of the lesson in exemplifying what was actually wrong.

man i am just way too fucking hyper analytical with this shit and also sometimes SO SLOW i--

[stetervault]

Why do you have a problem with Scott not wanting to murder people? It's not wrong to not want to kill. I think you're just biased becuse he's not morally bankrupt like Stiles or Peter (your faves).

Jesus I can't believe I'm still receiving these asks in this year of our lord 2023 but okay I have ten minutes before I need to leave the house, I can answer this.

First of all, you are absolutely right, I am 1000% biased towards Stiles and Peter because they're my favourite characters and my TW otp. Idk anybody who likes a character and ship and isn't at least a little more fond of them than any other characters/ships.

But second of all, I do not have a problem with a character not wanting to kill. It's a little boring to write because I like my characters feral and unhinged these days, but it's not like I haven't written them myself. That's not the issue here. What are you even talking about? Scott absolutely wants to kill. WHEN IT BENEFITS HIM.

Peter killing people for revenge is a big no-no. But then Scott is told that killing the Alpha can change him back? Then killing someone is suddenly perfectly alright. It doesn't matter that he didn't succeed in the end. That's just because Derek was faster, not because he didn't want to kill Peter.

And it's not just once. There's also Gerard, and okay, we all want Gerard dead, that's not the point. The point is, Scott plotted premeditated murder against the guy by swapping out his cancer pills with literal poison and then forced Derek to bite him. He absolutely 100% was out to kill Gerard because Gerard threatened his mom, and that's fine. I have issues with how he went about it, but it's not like I have a problem with him trying to take out Gerard when he's backed into a corner like that. The problem is his double standards, and it's one thing if he was young, and it was a personality flaw he would fix over time, but the thing is, he never grows out of it, because ten thousand seasons down the road, Donovan threatens Stiles' dad and literally tries to kill Stiles, so Stiles ends up accidentally killing the guy out of self-defense, but what's Scott's response? "There's always another choice." He doesn't let Stiles explain, doesn't give him the benefit of the doubt, he just walks away.

And there are other incidents where his hypocrisy just defies all sense and logic, but we're supposed to view him as this paragon of goodness and justice? Why is it okay for Scott to murder people but not anybody else? Because other people actually end up with dead bodies and he doesn't? That doesn't make Scott not want to kill. That just makes him bad at killing.

My biggest problem with Scott is that he is a huge-ass hypocrite, but he/the show never, not once, acknowledges that or tries to fix it in any way. Whether or not he wants to kill isn't the issue. It's that he only approves of it when killing someone benefits him, but when it doesn't involve him, he feels free to judge and condemn others for it.

[ofbreathandflame]

Mor is “Lying by Omission” and not Nesta when she lies to those men she was sleeping around with about her virginity? Nesta stans and y’all constant contradictions and stupid talking points

alright — you only come up with a response like this if you’ve fundamentally misunderstood what the problem is here.

(1) i think its an argument that can absolutely be made -- and considering sjm's writing history, i think we can at least draw parallels. i don't know you sent this as a gotcha -- the whole point im making is that writing that does into these characters is a consequence of sjm not writing them with care. that means that all of the characters fall consequence to the shitty writing. if you believe so -- then sure, make the argument. the problem is that the issues outside of the characters are being exploited. i really do dislike the the theme in her stories of people withholding pivitol pieces of information from people under the guise of love.

(2) the situation you're referencing isn't quite the same thing. not for the argument i was making, at least. first cassian immediately stops having sex with mor when he realizes what happened -- that in itself displays the difference between these two situation.

nesta doesn’t owe her sexual partners a summary of her sexual history. she’s just having a one night stand. second, the circumstances around nesta having sex aren’t being altered. the fear is centered around cassian finding out -- which means nothing because as of that point in the story, nesta has vehemently expressed no interest in cassian. nesta isn’t lying about being engaged to cassian, she isn’t specifically having sex with someone with the intent to accomplish something else. but in theory, if you wanted to make the argument, there’s definitely room to make it. morrigan specifically chooses cassian bc she wanted to lie down with "the greatest" which definitely a conversation for another day. she does choose him though -- to make a point to her family. which IS complex and NOT bad writing inherently. does mor owe cass a summary about her sexual history? - no. the problem isn't the virginity, its the lying. inherently the virginity thing isn't bad; but the story goes to great lengths to reiterate that this situation specifically enormous. AGAIN cassian IMMEDIATELY stops having sex with mor once he realizes she lied. he immediately recognizes the problem. he would not have even had sex with had he known the reality of the situation:

he’d done it, and regretted it at that very first thrust, when he’d felt her maidenhead yield to him, and realized the enormity of what she’d done

(3) the point isn’t that mor isn’t a victim, or that her situation isn’t worthy of empathy. the problem at hand a purely a writing problem. that’s really the point. the situation is (at the very least) complex. morrigan situation is complex and of intrigue. the problem is that the writing doesn't hold these issues to be dear enough to write with care.

(4) morrigan is badly written because she is constantly thrown away and minimized by the writing. huge swathes of people literally left the fandom because of how badly conceptualized more became after acomaf (subjective ofc - but this has been an issue in the fandom since the release of acowar).

(5) i just want the issues to properly acknowledged, i don't quite care about the feelings for the characters, i just think that sometimes people should take a step back and understand the concepts behind the characters. esp bc earlier in that thread people were literally justifying tamlin's abuse of lucien bc they argued that his actions during his abuse negated any ideas of victimhood, and that feyre is allowed to get her 'deserts' by having tamlin beat the hell out of lucien. like the argument being presented wasn't consistent and it just fell into abuse apologism. which is...definitely not conscious, thoughtful scholarship.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

IOTA Reviews: Illusion

You know, It's really sad how this is a Lila episode, and she somehow isn't the most annoying character to come out of it.

Let's get into the fifth episode of Miraculous Ladybug's fifth season: Illusion

We start off with a news broadcast where several people are interviewed about the recent developments this season. There's an attempt made to show differing perspectives, but while half are recurring characters who are confident Ladybug and Cat Noir will beat Monarch (Xavier, Mr. Damocles, and Alec), the other half are antagonistic characters who either blame Ladybug for everything going wrong or are too stupid to care about the bigger picture (XY, Chloe, and Bob Roth).

This is one of the overarching problems with the show, its refusal to show any nuance in its arguments. We already know how easy it is for the writers to blame Marinette for things whenever there's a conflict, but whenever there's an argument where both sides make interesting points, the opposing side is almost always represented by an antagonist or jerk who frames their view in either a condescending or idiotic way so it's easy for the viewer to brush them off, and the same can be applied to their side of the argument as well. Hell, it's already happened twice this season with Lila and Chloe (Multiplication, Determination). It just comes across like the show is pretending to act like its conflict is deeper without actually showing any real nuance with it. I get that some arguments aren't morally gray, but if you're trying to discuss Ladybug's past failures, put more effort into showing how the people of Paris would see something like this without knowing the full context.

Also, this is a minor thing, but I actually like how when we see Alec on the talk show, he's wearing a wig like the one he had in “Wishmaker”, and has the same positive outlook on life he had at the end of that episode. For a show that usually plays loosey-goosey with its continuity, it's surprising to see the writers actually acknowledge the character growth of someone as insignificant as Alec.

Congratulations, Miraculous Ladybug. You managed to give a very minor side character a consistent arc. Now if only you could put the same amount of effort into writing your main cast.

We cut to Adrien's room where, shock of all shocks, he isn't exactly a fan of his image being used for a high-tech ring without his consent. He storms off to see his father, but it turns out that Gabriel is experimenting with the idea of not being such a terrible father for once. He's making breakfast, saying that Adrien can call him “Dad” now, and even admits that he's been very neglectful towards his son ever since Emilie “disappeared”. Yeah, he's cooking breakfast in his white suit and haircut that makes him look like a grandpa for some reason, but hey, at least the kitchen isn't on fire.

Of course, Gabriel still isn't really good at comforting his son, as seen with his response to Adrien's concerns about Alliance.

Adrien: Speaking of which, Dad, I'm not really comfortable with having my face on all these rings. That's actually why I didn't want to be a model anymore, to avoid that. Do you understand?

Gabriel: Of course, I understand, my son. But that's the point; it's just an image, it's not you! And since this image frees you from your obligations, we, the Agrestes, are able to spend more time together. But if you'd rather everything went back to the way it was before, just say the word.

Adrien: You're probably right.

Gabriel: You'll see, my son. Alliance will bring us closer.

“I know you're concerned about me using your image for something that I could have hired literally anyone else for, but if you would rather go back to being a model on a strict schedule, just say the word.”

Father of the year, ladies and gentlemen.

We get a decent interaction between Marinette and Alya where they discuss ways that Monarch could be giving Miraculous to his Akumas, unaware of what the Alliance rings do. Alya comes up with an interesting hypothesis that Monarch is using the Dog Miraculous to swipe them back, and honestly, that sounds like a much better plan than “develop a cutting-edge AI ring and hope whoever I akumatize had enough money to buy one”. I like this bit, as it shows the two thinking of ways to stop Monarch beyond beating whatever Akuma he sends out next. It honestly could have been a really interesting story arc to see Marinette, Cat Noir, and Alya learn more about how Monarch is using the new Miraculous he got instead of having us know what he's doing already.

After class ends, Nino talks to Adrien about an underground resistance he's forming with his friends, deciding to give each member a condiment-themed title.

Alya: What's up with the sauces?

Nino: What's up is Ladybug and Cat Noir don't have us to help them anymore.

Alya: (nervously) Um... uh... what do you mean, “us”?

Nino: Well, us, you Rena Rouge, me Carapace! (Alya kicks Nino's leg underneath the table) Ouch! What's the big deal? We can tell Marinette and Adrien we used to be superheroes. It's not like we have any Miraculous that Monarch could steal from us. The only ones who need to protect their secret identities are Ladybug and Cat Noir, not us. And anyway, I already told Adrien about Carapace.

Adrien: (chuckles nervously)

Marinette: Adrien knew?! Alya, did you know that he knew?!

Alya: What, no, I swear I didn't know at all! (kicks Nino's leg again)

Nino: Ow! Come on! He's my best bud, I can tell him stuff! You and Marinette tell each other stuff, don't you?

Alya and Marinette: No we don't!

Yeah, remember how shocking it was for Nino to reveal that he and Alya were Rena Rouge and Carapace to Adrien in “Rocketear”, and how we thought this reveal would play into something big like the Season 4 finale, possibly splintering the trust several characters had with each other? This is what it culminates in. Wasn't waiting over a year since that plotpoint was established totally worth it for that gag that once again ignores the secret identity rule?

Also, just because you don't have a Miraculous, it doesn't mean Monarch can't target you like he did last season (Optigami, Sentibubbler), you dumbass.

For the first time in God knows how long, Lila actually becomes relevant when she asks to sit with the four, only to be rebuffed by Marinette and Nino. Using some more condiments and food as props, Nino explains his plan.

Nino: We're gonna film an akumatization.

Alya: And how are you, Comrade Ketchup, gonna be in the know when and where this akumatization takes place?

Nino: Easy, Comrade Beurre Maître d'Hôtel. I'm gonna make it happen.

Yep, this is the plot of the episode, people. Nino's going to try and get someone akumatized. Now I know what you're all obviously thinking: Isn't this cruel?

Adrien: Isn't that cruel?

Alya: Totally! To make someone suffer just to discover Monarch's technique? Super cruel!

Nino: No, it's not! You forget Ladybug always fixes everything in the end with her magic ladybugs! The akumatized victims forget what happened to them.

Oh yeah, this is totally ethical, you guys. Who cares about the emotional trauma an Akuma victim would go through, much less any civilians endangered by their rampage?

To make things even better, guess who Nino wants to get akumatized?

Okay, putting aside what we, the audience, already know about Gabriel that Nino doesn't, why would he think pissing off one of the most influential fashion designers in the city of Paris is a good idea? He says he's targeting him because it's easy to do so during parent-teacher conferences, but why not target someone else who has been akumatized more often than him, like Xavier/Mr. Pigeon? I don't think the idea of a more morally gray plan to stop Monarch is a bad one, it's just that this plan is so stupid, and the writers only go over the ethical implications, and that said plan is so ludicrous, Nino is basically asking for a restraining order.

While Adrien and Marinette agree to Nino's plan, Alya only hesitantly goes along with it, but unbeknownst to any of them, Lila was overhearing their conversation, so she goes to tell Gabriel what they're doing. During the conferences, Marinette barges in and pretends to trip and drop some pizza onto Gabriel's clothes, and I'm going to assume that either the pizza was cold of Gabriel is really good at keeping a cool head because there's no way taking a hot pizza to the chest wouldn't hurt like hell. Adrien and Alya come in with more food, and we get the one funny joke of the episode with Alya half-assing her performance as the half-heartedly throws some cake onto Gabriel's suit. Pretty funny how Nino is conveniently the only one who isn't taking the risk by attacking Gabriel in front of his teacher by filming the whole thing, isn't it?

Gabriel has had enough and does a 180, planning to take Adrien out of school and somehow, Marinette blames herself for going along with the plan... even though she was the only one to not approve of it, while Adrien and Alya did, and even then, the latter two were very hesitant. It turns out this was all part of Gabriel's plan, as we see him transform into Monarch as soon as he gets to his lair and uses Trixx's power to create a Mirage of his civilian form, having a breakdown so dramatic, I'm surprised he didn't end it by saying, “YOU ARE TEARING ME APART, MARINETTE!”.

The illusion of Gabriel turns into the Collector again, and now he supposedly has the Horse Miraculous' Voyage as a power. Adrien and Marinette transform into Cat Noir and Ladybug respectively, and try to fend off the “Akuma”. Back in Monarch's lair, we learn that he somehow has the ability to unify with five different Miraculous at once, choosing to do so with the Bee, Mouse, Horse, and Rooster Miraculous. Why is he able to do this now?

Monarch uses Voyage and heads to the sewers, activating Venom before using Multiplication to create eight smaller clones of himself, finally using Sublimination to give the copies the power of invisibility. Strange, wouldn't wanting to be invisible count as a wish? While looking for “the Collector”, Ladybug uses her Lucky Charm, getting a bag of shredded cheese. The two chase after the illusion, only to fall through a Voyage portal into the sewers, where Cat Noir is almost immediately stunned by one of the clones. Hey, it took five whole episodes this season for him to be incapacitated by an Akuma to pointlessly raise the stakes this time! It's a new record! Ladybug throws the cheese to reveal the clones, who are then chased off by some nearby rats.

Monarch goes back to his normal form, and after a small pep talk, the illusion pretends to reject the Akuma entirely before falling into the water. The real Gabriel detransforms and then pretends to have gotten out. So Gabriel tricked the heroes with his foolproof plan... except for the fact that Ladybug and Cat Noir should have recognized the use of Venom, the hidden clones of the Collector when the video Nino got only said he had the Horse Miraculous' power, the akuma somehow purifying itself when Ladybug still needed to de-evilize it in “Rocketear” and “Penalteam”, the fact that Gabriel should be soaking wet from falling into the water, and the—okay, you all know where this is going.

Meanwhile, Nino sees the footage of the illusion and sees what he believes to be the way Monarch gave the Collector the Horse Miraculous' powers. Nino then apologizes to Gabriel for attacking him, Gabriel forgives him, and Nino invites him into the Resistance, with a bunch of new members. The final scene reveals that in addition to Nino, Alya, Marinette, Adrien, and Gabriel, the Resistance now has Max, Kim, Rose, Juleka, Ivan, Mylene, and to Marinette's horror, Lila. Also, there's a post-credits scene where Gabriel explains what he did to Tomoe when literally everyone watching was able to figure it out.

Okay, so let's summarize. The first mission for Nino's resistance involved assaulting a private civilian, was easily discovered before it could even be implemented, was just as easily foiled by an illusion, now Monarch and one of his allies have infiltrated the alliance as moles, and Nino isn't even aware that his plan was a colossal failure. This resistance isn't exactly going to be like the Rebel Alliance, is it?

Yeah, this episode sucked. It's easily the worst one so far in my opinion. There were a handful of decent moments and ideas here, but my God, the story was just terrible. Morally gray subject or not, it's hard to get behind the heroes when they try to intentionally piss someone off for a plan that the audience knows is going to fail, especially a plan as stupid as Nino's. This episode features Nino at his most obnoxious and unlike Alya, Marinette, and especially Adrien, he doesn't even feel bad for what he did to Gabriel when it ended up being (as far as we know) completely pointless. It feels like the writers wanted to gloss over the ethics of Nino's plan by making Gabriel the victim, because if it was anyone else, it would have made him look like a colossal prick. The fact that he learns nothing and thinks his moronic scheme was a success really doesn't help.

The other characters thankfully weren't as bad. It seemed like the writers were trying to show some self-awareness by having Alya, Marinette, and Adrien object to the plan in one way or another, but it never really went much other than them begrudgingly going along with it, much less calling him out for his actions. At the same time, they all got some decent moments, like Alya and Marinette's discussion about Monarch and Adrien struggling to convey his feelings about the Alliance rings to Gabriel.

It's also kind of weird that it took us about five episode into the season for Lila to finally be relevant again after she did absolutely nothing for the last three episodes of Season 4 and the first four episodes of this season. It was only three and a half years since “Ladybug”, the last major Lila episode premiered, right? But hey, at least the writers didn't overindulge in the dumb Lila lies like her other episodes, and was used more as an informant to kick off Gabriel's counter to Nino's plan.

Putting aside how terrible Nino's plan was, Gabriel's plan still had a lot of problems to it. Like I already mentioned, it's a little strange that Ladybug and Cat Noir never talk about the tiny clones they fought, or the fact that Cat Noir was stung by Venom. I can kind of suspend my disbelief by saying Ladybug was too focused on the battle to think, but why the hell didn't Cat Noir say anything? You would think after working alongside Queen Bee and Vesperia, he would recognize what being stung by Venom must look like. Yeah, Ladybug and Cat Noir didn't know Monarch can now use more powers for some reason, but it still really bothers me, because they should know the Collector can't multiply himself. It's also strange that he made his trick so hard to find when you would think it would be more obvious to see

But overall, this one was just a chore to get through. It feels like the writers saw how much some people didn't like Nino in “Rocketear”, and were like, “You call THAT character assassination?” And speaking of...

THE BIGGEST IDIOT OF THE EPISODE IS... NINO

Was there ever any doubt? The dude talked about his identity in a public place, nonchalantly blew him and his girlfriend's cover when he had no reason to for his Resistance, tried to get his best friend's dad akumatized while not caring about any potential damage, showed no remorse for what he did when his plan blew up in his face, tried to tell Ladybug and Cat Noir about what he learned while they were fighting the Collector, and all that was for a plan that didn't even work because the intel was discovered with ease, to say nothing about how he unintentionally let two enemies into his own Resistance. I've seen a lot of stupid decisions in this show, but never have I seen a single episode where a character makes screw-up after screw-up and doesn't even realize how much of a colossal moron he's being. With the past five episodes I covered and awarded Biggest Idiot Awards to (Ladybug, Alya, Xuppu, Mr. Damocles, and Luka), it was more them not seeing the bigger picture. Here, Nino is honestly trying to help Ladybug and Cat Noir, yet he failed at his job in every way.

[sawturn77]

𝑶𝑪𝑬𝑨𝑵 𝑬𝒀𝑬𝑺 (𝒇𝒖𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒈𝒖𝒓𝒐 𝒎𝒆𝒈𝒖𝒎𝒊 𝒙 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓)

02: somebody I used to know.

MASTERLIST.

january 1st, 2018.

----

suguru saved me from the awkward silence and wiggly eyebrows from satoru. "y/n! come help me set up the table, please!" "coming!" i bolted out of there. phew, at least im free from embarrassment now. . once i got in the kitchen, yuji and nobara were arguing about who was going to eat the most food. suguru handed me the utensils that went on the table. i realized hadn't talked to him since i got home. he gently patted my head instead of ruffling my hair like satoru. "how was your visit to the ice rink?" he asked, gently smiling at me. "It was good, until i hit my head and fell on my butt." suguru chuckled at my defeated tone. i started to set the table, placing the chopsticks, spoons, etc in front of every seat. i watch as yuji and nobara approach him, talking to him comfortably. i didnt know they were friends with megumi. he seems like the closed off type, especially now.

----

soon, shoko arrives and everyone eats. i have to admit, my brother sure can cook. im starting to think hes like satoru's malewife..anyways, after everyone finished eating, we had a drawing, and whoever drew the short stick had to wash dishes while everyone else got to play uno. God was NOT favoring me today. there were two short sticks, and guess who got them! me and megumi. FREAKING MEGUMI. you know what? it cant get more awkward than this.... right?

wrong.

here, we stood right beside each other, shoulder touching shoulder, leg touching leg. i wanted to crawl in a hole and disappear. the worst part was, he wasn’t even bothered by it! he didn’t even acknowledge it! surely, if i was him, i’d at least be stealing glances! oh, well, maybe he isnt that kind of guy. he was never interested in stuff like that. the two of us stood at the kitchen sink, washing dishes. the entire time, i was wondering how to start a conversation and barely got anything done! megumi had done most of it. now he probably thinks im useless! he’ll never associate himself with someone so unhelpful. “so,” i started, lips trembling. he glances at me. how come his eyelashes are so long? does he use mascara? “how..how have you b-been lately?” i wanted to curse myself. who the hell stutters nowadays!? “alright. what about you?” i could feel my shoulders tensing. i had heard his voice earlier, but now, im really paying attention to it. just thinking about it makes my stomach do axles. “good, actually.” i smiled, desperate to keep myself from squealing. minutes past, he hasnt said anything after that. okay, you dont wanna talk to me, cool. fine. whatever. (squealing) part of me wanted yuji and nobara to come in and start being annoying to break the ice. hell, maybe even satoru would do. after what seemed like decades, we finally finished washing the dishes. i sighed in relief, but i couldnt have a moment of grace before my heart nearly jumped out of my chest. i felt a napkin on my cheek, wiping soap off my face. “sorry,” he muttered. kill. me. please. “you had soap on your face.” i laughed awkwardly while he just looked at me, “really? i-uhm, i didn’t know! thanks.” what the hell, y/n?? what is your problem??

yuji and nobara ran towards me and megumi, bombarding us with a fury of words i didnt understand. something along the lines of, “guess what?? i won against mr. gojo!” “no, kugisaki cheated!” “the hell? i didnt cheat! all of you just suck!” “cheater cheater, pumpkin eater!” “grow up!” megumi frowned at their antics. “idiots” he muttered.

an: hey guys sorry for the short chapter😔i kinda rushed bc i have to gts early bc i have school tmrw. but i will be posting tomorrow or the day after that! it normally takes me two days (4 hours total) to write this much anyway

TAGLIST: @fillmeup6969 @morgyyyyy @kasumitenbaz (OPEN)

[songmingisthighs]

Cache

introduction pt. i | pt. ii | pt. iii

<< previous | masterlist | next >>

ch. lxxxi - Kyle ?

wooyoung × reader, ??? × reader

buy me coffee ?

in a school filled with the affluent, it would only make sense for birds of a feather to flock. but what if your new status doesn't immediately buy you a way into said flock? what if instead, it bought you sure rejection? to the rich and powerful, having different masks is a must. despite some people knowing your true self and your secrets

You were walking in the hallway of your classroom when you bumped into someone. "Watch it," the person hissed.

You felt bad for bumping into the person, whoever bumped into the other, you yourself weren't paying attention. Besides, it doesn't take much to just apologize. You turned to look at the person to apologize with the most polite smile you can muster. "I'm sorry, excuse me," you said.

But once you saw who the person is, your smile hardened.

Seonghwa glared with his sharp eyes, dusting the arm you bumped into BY ACCIDENT. He was acting like you dirtied him by just bumping into him. "Maybe pay attention to your surroundings? Are you that inconsiderate of literally everyone else around you?" he scoffed.

Despite his action towards you, all you could think about was how he had been doing such a great job ignoring you, why is he acting like this all of a sudden? Like he HAD to let you know he has feelings for you. Before this moment, had you found yourself meeting Seonghwa in the hallways or library or during assembly, you both would either lock gazes for a second before averting or just simply acknowledge the other's presence. It might sound weird that you both still interacted in a sense considering you both aren't friends anymore and it turned out that he never really considered you a friend anyways. But you both were always civil. Or, at least that's what you thought.

You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms in front of your chest, "It was an accident, Seonghwa. It's not like I bumped you with a car," you pointed out, expressing your distaste at his pettiness. It seemed like Seonghwa fully expected you to reply as he stared at you with an eyebrow raised, "Are you saying that you WANT to bump me with a car?" he asked. Now it felt like he was egging you to create a problem. Worst case scenario is that he's trying to prove you're intending to hurt him deliberately or something. Petty bitch. "Oh god Seonghwa, why don't you just call up your army of lawyers and cry to them," you spat out of frustration, not wanting to deal with him anymore.

Seonghwa was about to say something when someone called for him from behind you, catching both your and Seonghwa's attention, halting the argument.

You saw Wooyoung standing with his head tilted to the side, eyebrows raised. "What are you two doing?" he asked, looking back and forth between you and Seonghwa. Seonghwa nodded at your direction, pointing at you with his chin, "She bumped into me," and you rolled your eyes once again at that, "By accident," you added. But he wouldn't back down as he took a step closer to you and glared at you directly, "We don't know that, no one can trust your words," he hissed. His out of pocket comment made you furrow your eyebrows but your palms started to sweat as you had a feeling that he was talking about a certain something that you know. "What the fuck does that mean?" you asked.

Luckily enough, someone pulled Seonghwa away from you as another person stepped between you and him, "Okay, we're not doing this right now," Yeosang said as he gripped Seonghwa's arm harder, making sure he can't break free. Wooyoung turned to look at his older friend as he shook his head, "Stop it hyung, it isn't worth it," he pointed out. His words seemed to make Seonghwa pause and calm down, you can only assume that the logical side of his brain is working again. With Wooyoung's words, Seonghwa ripped his hand from Yeosang's grip and spared you one last glare before pushing past, DELIBERATELY BUMPING INTO YOU.

As he walk away, Wooyoung hesitantly look between Seonghwa and Yeosang, as if communicating with his friend who was still standing there. Yeosang nodded at Wooyoung in assurance, "Yeah, you make sure he gets to his car," he said. Wooyoung nodded and turned to follow Seonghwa. But before he did, he looked at you with eyes that conveyed something like worry which surprised you because you don't know what it meant.

Once left alone with Yeosang, you could only stood there in awkwardness. You've never spent much alone time with him, it was always awkward for some reason. You don't know what kind it is, but tension is always palpable when it's just the two of you.

Not knowing what to say, you simple slowly start to make your way back into the classroom to grab your bag. "So..." you started, slowly shuffling away, "I'll get going now," you decided to say as you immediately rush inside the classroom to escape the awkwardness.

Your hands moved quick, packing your things into your bag. You'd hate to keep your friends waiting.

"You know, a thank you would be nice,"

Startled, you dropped the pencil case you were holding to the floor as you turned around to see Yeosang frowning by the door. "You... Want me to thank you for making sure your friend won't get in trouble?" you asked, making sure you understood his word correctly because, honestly, you didn't quite understand how his logic was working at that moment. Yeosang crossed his arms on his chest and leaned on the doorframe, staring at you, "It's weird when you put it that way," he scoffed, "I'm just saying that it would've polite to say thank you when someone does something for you," he added in a matter-of-factly way. Which annoys you because who does he think he is?

"Oh wow, okay? So, you mean to tell me that you do things just so that people would thank you? And here I thought San and Wooyoung were the narcissists," you scoffed, smirking at him challengingly. With a roll of his eyes, Yeosang retorted back, "You know I don't mean it like that, (y/n)," he sighed. Not really caring, you shook your head and returned to packing your bags, "Whatever, Yeosang. You know I don't owe you anything, not even a thank you," you paused to grab your fallen pencil case on the ground before continuing with what you were doing, "If it's a thank you you wanted from me, consider all the 'thank you's that you owed me from the past were paid off. Because let's face it, Yeosang, you never approached me to lend a hand, heck you never even personally approached me literally by yourself. If you had something you wanted, you always waited until someone else needed me too and just piled up whatever the fuck it is on me without caring about my availability or how I was doing." Once your things are packed, you slung your bag on by one of its straps and headed towards the door where Yeosang was still standing, staring at you. "You know, for people who didn't want to have shit to do with me after Wooyoung humiliated me, you and Seonghwa seemed to have a lot to say today," you said with a shake of your head in disbelief before trying to push past Yeosang.

Alas, Yeosang was too strong and his shoulder was too broad, it prevented you from escaping the room and getting away from him. With a step backwards, you glared up at Yeosang, "Can you move away, please? I want to go home."

Much to your surprise, Yeosang was looking at you with a frown on his face but his eyes showed something that is more akin to disappointment. "Well?" you asked, waiting for him to do something. It seemed like Yeosang didn't even know how to react at that point. He wanted to do something, say something, you can clearly see how he was struggling to say something. But why would he?

"I can't believe you only remember the bad things I did," he muttered in disbelief. "Excuse me?" you scoffed, "How could I not? That's all you did!" you exclaimed, equally in disbelief. "I tried to be there for you too, (y/n), truly and I can't believe you don't acknowledge me being there for you," he shook his head in disappointment as if he was actually hurt. The audacity of this man. "What the fuck are you talking about, Yeosang? I don't know if you forgot our entire interaction this whole or maybe you had amnesia recently, but this is the most interaction we had where it's just the two of us!" you couldn't help but raised your voice at him because you couldn't comprehend his reaction.

"You don't get it," Yeosang hissed as he turned to walk away from you. Seeing him walking away made you mad because there is no way in hell he's allowed to walk away just like that after spewing some bullshit about being there for you when he has never done that. You ran up to Yeosang and grabbed his arm, "What do I not get?" you asked. It seemed like Yeosang wanted to answer, but you saw him hesitating. But he shook his head and pulled his hand away from your grip gently, "Nevermind," he muttered. But you wouldn't let him off that easy. You grabbed his arm again, harder this time, and made him face so you can glare at him properly, "Tell. Me.," you pressed.

"I'm Kyle," he blurted out.

You felt your breath stop.

The both of you stood frozen, staring at each other. The only sound you could hear was people in the distance, chattering as they exit the school.

"I... Am Kyle," he repeated.

You let go of his arm as if the feeling of his skin burned you. "No, you don't know what you're talking about, I have your number and you are DEFINITELY not Kyle," you said, trying to make an excuse as to why Yeosang claimed that he was Kyle. "I do," he sighed as he reached into his pockets and took out two similar-looking phones, "We were connected from the school's valentine's event, we were a match. I put my "business" phone number there so no one would know who I am," you stared at the phone, brain still trying to make sense of things but it couldn't. Seeing you frozen, Yeosang took it as an opportunity for him to continue talking, "I... Wanted to tell you who I am, I told you but you know that I'm scared of how you would react if you knew and I don't want to jeopardize the relationship we had because I promise you, I'm being as honest as I can be, I do like you romantically and I can't stress how much I want to be with you," his hand reached forward and it slowly wrapped itself around your wrist, his thumb caressing your pulse point, "Can you understand where I'm coming from?" he asked, seeking your eyes pitifully.

It was hard for you to process the information you just got. And with Yeosang- Kyle? Saying that he wants to be with you, that he had been the one who was all lovey-dovey and even claiming to be your best friend, sharing your interests and even spending time together, when in reality, Yeosang has been one of the people who were using you for their own personal agenda whilst simultaneously ensuring that you remain feeling like as if you're nothing more than the poor person you were before. It was too much.

You wanted to rip your hands off of his grip, slap him, kick him, and tell him how much you hate him for playing with you. But at the same time, you don't want to do that. Because if he is who he said he is, if he's truly your Kyle, you can't help but consider the fact that you have genuine feelings for him, you truly do care for him and it's not that just because you found out that Yeosang is Kyle that can suddenly say that he was faking it this whole time. Because to be honest, the Kyle side of Yeosang was the most genuine, most comfortable person you've ever had the pleasure (or is it displeasure now?) of knowing.

So you carefully took your hands out of Yeosang's gentle grip. When you were detached from him, Yeosang can only stare at you with much sadness in his eyes, he could hear his heart cracking. But he knew he deserved it. After all, he was the sick bastard who kept his identity from the person he claimed to love. It was all on him.

"I..." you started, wanting to say something to Yeosang, anything. Yeosang waited, expecting you to cuss him out, berate him, attack him, anything just so he could know how you feel about him being Kyle. But the more he waited, the more he realized that you yourself didn't know how to react.

"I need to go."

That was the only thing you told him before you turned and quickly walked away and out of the school, wanting to escape.

This had to be a dream (or nightmare) because no way in hell is life treating you like you're a joke.

Not funny.

taglist :

@rdiamond2727 @miaatiny @baguette-atiny @kpopnightingale @dear-dreamie @potaeto-writes-on-wp @kwanisms @qghosty @charreddonuts @noonaishere @bbymatz @maddiebabyxoxo @kawennote09 @woo-stars @treasure-1117 @starjoongie1117 @linhyyboo12 @kodzukein @dreamlesswonder86 @glitterhongjoong @kitty4hwa @ateezourstars @starlight-channie @jo-hwaberry @yla-aira @hyuckilstan @phenomenalgirl9 @flamingi @gxlden-bxbyy @kirooz @leagreenly @memorymonster @purenjuniverse @meowmeowminnie @star1117-archives @ilsedingsx @kkayfan @ckline35 @jaxavance @yoongiigolden @jayeonnature @hwanchaesong @thesolarplanetarysystem @multihoe-net @jwnghyuns @moon-gyus

@cutie-wooyo @rubberduckieyourtheone

[queentheweeb]

Male Ronal X Fem Metkayina Reader Pt 2

Part 1, Final

A/N: Your friend/tsmuke's name is Yira'vo, and I'm re-using my OC Ranari as Ron'ek's best friend.

-----------------------------------------

You're not sure if something transpired between you and Ron'ek or if you were the delusional one here and believed he was treating you differently, but he was so much nicer and appeared everywhere that you were. You were either by yourself, with your family, or with Yira'vo, and he would somehow, someway, be there in the background watching. You caught him smirking a few times and started telling Yira'vo about it.

"You're not crazy, Y/N. I've noticed." The two of you were at the communal dinner talking amongst each other about the phenomenon that was Ron'ek. "How do you feel about it? Do you like it? Would you want it to continue?" You thought about it as you munched on the Nalutsa with veggies. You must have been quiet too long because she nudged you, urging you to look at her. "You can tell me the truth, and I won't judge you." You knew that already. You sighed, turning to face her fully with a small smile.

"I do like the attention. I like that he acknowledges me. It reminds me of how he was when we were growing up. I have always thought he was cute, funny, and sometimes stupid. Now he is so strong, the perfect leader, he's the man of your dreams, honestly... I just miss his smile." You were looking down, smiling to yourself as Yira'vo grinned to herself. 

"Well, since you told me all of that... It's only fair I tell you about Ranari." You leaned in excitedly as she started telling you about Ranari, Ron'ek's best friend, who was popular among everyone, too. Look at the two of you gossiping about the Olo'eyktan and his brother. 

"I know this is childish, a little, but...imagine we both get who we want." The two of you bumped heads, giggling, missing two pairs of footsteps coming your way. Yira'vo was always on your type of timing, though. 

"For all we know, it could be true. Imagine the look on-" The clearing of a throat stopped your conversation. You both yelped and looked up at the exact two people you both were talking about. You looked as they both sat down with their food across from the two of you.

"You don't mind if we sit here, right?" You minded for one reason but chose not to say anything.

"You can sit anywhere you want." You smiled at both of them, turning to share a look with your friend, who was staring at Ranari. At least someone was enjoying herself a little more. It was a little tense, but it felt nice when Ranari and Yira'vo started talking. You had a feeling that Toni'va and her crowd would come really soon. 

"Are you alright, Y/N?"  You glanced up at Ron'ek, giving him a tense smile and a head shake. "We can leave if you want." You shook your head no again, reaching a hand-out but stopping midway. You saw how his own hand twitched.

"You're not the problem, and neither is Ranari... It's the people coming right now." Your eyes bored into his, and when he heard the tale-tale noise of Toni'va, his face changed along with Ranari's. You felt an unnatural rage swell up inside of you that you broke the utensils you were using with your fingers. You sighed and turned to Yira when she grabbed your hand and squeezed. She let go, and you used your fingers to finish eating your food as your once quiet spot was overrun with noise.

"Why are the two of you sitting over here? Everyone else is over there." You were so mad it was unbelievable. You ignored what was happening as you ate slowly, trying to savor your food.

"We wanted to." His voice wasn't even soft anymore. He was using the voice that everyone heard, even though Toni'va didn't pick up on it. 

"It's so boring over here, though, nothing of importance or someone to talk to." You were getting light-headed with how angry you were getting. You couldn't look at anyone but Yira, who was also losing her patience. You missed how Ron'ek was looking at you.

"No one told you to sit over here; you could go sit back over there." You saw Toni'va's eye twitch at Ranari but focused back on Ron'ek. Ranari had a good point; no one told them to come here and be obnoxious. They squeezed themselves onto the log that you were already sitting on and were pushing you, but you weren't budging. The amount of self-control you have is astounding.

"Even though it's a little cramped, I don't mind sitting here." They kept making jabs at you and Yira and being obnoxious on purpose. You had finally finished eating, with Yira's tail wrapped around yours as the two of you could talk to Ranari a bit, but even the others demanded his attention. It was crazy how they came into your space and wanted the two of you to leave. 

"Can you move over? Or just sit on the ground. It's cramped." You were done and simply were going to swing, but Yira saved you by dragging you over. Now, she was pressed against Ranari, and you were pressed against her. 

"Thanks for being a sweety." The sarcasm dripping from her voice was enough to make you go for her throat, but Yira wrapped an arm and leg around you, whispering rapidly in your ear. 

"They are not worth it; I hate them too, but they are not worth it." You relaxed completely, and she let you go, turning to talk to Ranari while you looked around at everyone, and to your chagrin, they took up the space and were still being obnoxious. They wanted the two of you to move so badly. 

"You move anymore, you'll be in his lap." Yira nodded, but Ranari gripped her by the waist, pulling her halfway into his lap.

"I'm not bothered by it." He grinned lightly at Yira, and you smirked at her; maybe your delusion wasn't delusional after all. It was calm, and Ro'nek seemed more bothered as time passed, and you didn't blame him. Yira finally left, leaving you alone with them, and you were about to get up and go yourself when Toni'va's snarky voice interrupted you.

"Phew, we can all breathe and move around freely." That was your last straw, and with a speed that surprised you, your foot connected with her face, sending her sprawling back. Before her friends could get up and do something, Ron'ek stood between you and them, growling and silencing everyone. Toni'va got up, holding her nose, which was bleeding. 

"Enough." He looked at everyone and glanced back at you, meeting your eyes.

"Punish her! She can't go around attacking people! Look at what she did to me!" Ron'ek was looking, and he was impressed with the speed at which she did that.

"You were verbally attacking her. You kept annoying and picking on her; she had had enough of it." Toni'va looked like she wanted to screech, and it's a miracle that she didn't.

"You're taking her side?! You're just going to let her get away with it!" Toni'va wanted to see you get punished, and you're unsure if you need to be humiliated like that. You didn't want to be, but if what everyone said was true, you just assaulted his future Tsahik.

"Whatever I tell her is none of your concern. Get. Away. From. Here." He added a growl to the last word and watched as they all left, but not without hissing at you. You were going to go for her throat again, but he lifted you up, threw you over his shoulder, and started walking with you further into the woods. It was silent for a while as you dangled, watching the trees get thicker and trying not to think how your ass was next to his face. 

"Where are we going?" You didn't get an answer, and you hissed, hitting his back, but he was unphased. "Arrogant man giving me the silent treatment." He walked a few more before stopping and placing you down on your butt, and you looked up at him only for him to sit down in front of you. You huffed and leaned against the tree, refusing to meet his eyes.

"Look at me." You refused and closed your eyes to be more stubborn. You heard him sigh, and you yelped when he grabbed your legs and tugged you forward. You turned around then, and he wrapped your legs around his hips, which forced you to be on his own legs/lap, and he wrapped his arms around your waist. "Wrap your arms around me." You looked at him, stunned.

"Huh?" He wanted you to do what now? He kept scanning your face just...taking you in.

"Come on. Do it for me, please." You blinked and wrapped your arms around his neck, and he smiled at you. "There, now you're looking at me." You felt yourself getting flustered but didn't look away from him. "I want to know what's wrong with your relationship with Toni'va." That triggered you, and you frowned at him.

"There is no relationship; she made sure to get rid of it when everyone told her she would be Tsahik. She started treating everyone who doesn't worship the ground she walks on as beneath her, and I fall into that category. Everyone follows her orders as if she already got the title when she has nothing." Toni'va bothered your soul. 

"Why does she act like that?" You weren't sure if he was probing for answers, but you'd give them to him. 

"Everyone put it in her head; everyone listened to her, convinced her she was the most desirable, and you didn't bother correcting anyone. You don't like to speak; you avoid her and avoid any conversations about mating her. People believe you're being mysterious and playing hard to get." He snorted at that.

"I don't like her and am not interested in mating her. Never was. She is too arrogant and difficult for me. She will not make a good mate for me nor a good Tsahik. I do not know why everyone thinks I am choosing her." That was a relief to you, but it was short-lived.

"If she is not the one you want, then why not tell her and go after the one you want? Who's feelings do you really care about? Do you like the idea of having everyone chase after you? Is that why you haven't told her?" You could tell you were aggravating him, but you needed to hear his truth.

"She's never alone. I do not wish to embarrass her, but it looks like I have to, so the one I want doesn't think otherwise."  You both were pressed so close together that you could feel his heart beating fast and taste his breath on your lips. You wanted to kiss him so bad. 

"Who's the one you want?" You already knew, but you wanted to see what he does. You saw how he glanced down at your lips before meeting your eyes again.

"You." He closed the space between your lips, and this was intoxicating. You found yourself pressing harder against him, and he moved a hand to the back of your neck to hold you in place. When the two of you pulled back, both of you were breathing heavily, and you giggled, which made him chuckle. Your eyes widened at the sound, and he let out a little laugh, showing his teeth. "You act like you haven't seen me smile before." You shook your head in disbelief

"Not like that...Not since we were children." He hummed because there was nothing he could say to that. He leaned forward, pressing his forehead against yours, and the two of you stood like that, breathing each other in. "Is it me that you truly want?" You wanted to believe, but you also wanted to protect your feelings.

"Yes, ma Y/N. I want you. I want to be with you for life. I want to mate in front of Eywa with you...I have a courting gift that I want to give to you...if you will have me." That was the first time you'd heard him sound nervous, and it was endearing that you made him nervous.

"...Yes, I will accept as long as Toni'va and everyone else in the clan knows. Be sure of your feelings for me because there will be no turning back." You weren't threatening him, but you didn't want him to make a mistake.

"When the sun rises and the day starts, I will announce who my future Tsahik will be. I want everyone to know who I want, and that is you. Not Toni'va. I want my Y/N, and I will have you." You both had opened your eyes at the conviction in his voice, and you couldn't help but smile at him.

"Tomorrow?" He took a deep breath and pressed another kiss to your lips.

"Tomorrow ma syulang."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Part 3 will be the final part of this! Hope you guys enjoy reading this.

[meimi-haneoka]

{drabble} Somewhere I belong - Kaito/Akiho

This is the second Kaito x Akiho / YunaAki drabble that is paired with the first one I wrote from Akiho's POV. Please read that one first so you can have a better understanding of the situation!

The setting is the same as the first drabble, but Kaito's thoughts drift all over the place because....well, he's Kaito. He's been officially named as the "overthinker" by CLAMP so now I'm going to call him that for quite some time 😂

As you will be able to see, while Akiho thought to herself without problems that she loved him, you won't see Kaito thinking that, here. This is a very early stage of their new life and he's still far from acknowledging any of that, but he's starting to come to terms with things, at least.

This one might be a bit more angstier than the other one, again because this is Kaito we're talking about. His self-loathing won't disappear overnight. But I hope that the finale will comfort you, at least. ❤️

Once again, I'm not a native English speaker so forgive me if any line sounds weird!

P.s. Dandelion, thank you again! P.s.2 Yes, I also like Linkin Park 😁

Excerpt:

“I’m sorry...”, I blurted out, in a whisper. Every time we ended up in this situation, I would apologize. And she would never reply to it.   Maybe an apology wasn’t what she wanted to hear, but I had yet to find out what were the right words to say. 

Kaito's POV

I don't think I'll ever be able to forget it. 

The way she looked at me when they told her everything, that night.  The way she had slowly turned her head and kept her gaze fixed on me, while the British magician rattled off all that my plan had entailed, down to the way it had affected my body. He recovered all the previous memories, and he knew Akiho-san needed an explanation more than anyone else, but also knew I was in no condition (neither mental, nor physical) to give it to her. I could feel her gaze piercing through me, while someone was helping me sitting down, as I couldn't even stand up. 

Her hands gripped tightly the tablet, shaking. Her blue eyes, usually crystalline and bright like the Caribbean Sea, darkened several shades and became like a raging storm. They once again glazed over with emerging tears, but she probably held them back, because not even one dropped. 

And I felt so weak. My guilt, growing again by the second.   I would've given anything to remove that hardened gaze from her and bring back the soft features I've always known. But you see, that was my problem.   Giving everything the way I did before wasn’t the correct answer. And I had finally surrendered to the truth, that night.  But I didn't know any other way. I simply didn't know how to express how important she is to me without pushing it to an extreme, and that was exactly how we came to that point.  

I don’t know when exactly I started to hear that voice inside of me, telling me that I wanted to connect with her. 

I could hear it every day, before I carried out my plan. Louder and louder and louder. Kicking and screaming inside of me. I tried to fight it for so long, forcing myself not to hear it. But when she asked Sakura-san to bring me back, and she stated that she refused to keep living a fabricated life, wanting to go back to what she had before with me, I suddenly grew so tired. So, so tired. I was exhausted. I didn't want to fight it anymore. 

I've fought countless magicians ever since I was a little boy, and defeated every single one of them. People kept me at a distance for that. And yet, completely oblivious to all of that, she was the one who defeated me every single time.   Even this time around, she won. She won over that brutal, devastating desire to disappear forever that had consumed my life to such degree. She won over my guilt and self-loathing that I, quite frankly, haven’t got rid of yet. 

So here I was, now, clinging to her like a lifeline in the kitchen, while I waited to regain control of my breathing. I had tried to hide it from her, the first couple of times after I got back on my feet, following that fateful night. But she found out every single time and made very clear that if we wanted to live together from now on, this had to stop. I didn't know what to do with myself anymore. Why was I fighting it again?  So I did as she requested, and by now, this was already the third episode of seizure she had witnessed. 

I didn't know.... how any of this worked. But I wanted to learn. I wanted to try. 

I was slowly starting to get it. Why I caved in and agreed to go back to her, that night, despite how confused I was and how much I still despised myself for making her cry like that.   She made me feel wanted.   Made me feel accepted. Made me feel like I finally belonged somewhere. I hadn’t realized how much I actually had yearned for that, all this time. 

I thought I was nothing to her. I thought that she could've lived perfectly fine without me, without remembering anything of what we experienced together. Because, in the end, who was I? Just her butler. I embarked on that mission with the full understanding that I would've always been just her butler, and I played that part till the end at the best of my ability. An expendable tool to let her reach the happiness she deserved.  

But I wasn't. I wasn't, and I couldn't see that. I could only finally realize it that night in the most harrowing way possible, causing that face I wished to see eternally smile to be tainted with burning tears, as she poured out all her pain. Pain that I had caused. This wasn't the kind of support she wanted from me, and I failed her terribly. 

I was willing to do anything to make things right. So when she asked me, no, rather demanded to not be kept in the dark whenever I had one of my seizures, I had no choice but to comply. That was what she wanted, and there was no way I could refuse it to her. 

But now that the medicine was finally starting to kick in, and my breathing stabilized to a more normal rate, I raised my head to look at her worried face and I couldn’t help but think how unfair all of this was on her. She was so young, and she didn’t deserve to withstand all of this because of my choices.  

“I’m sorry...”, I blurted out, in a whisper. Every time we ended up in this situation, I would apologize. And she would never reply to it.   Maybe an apology wasn’t what she wanted to hear, but I had yet to find out what were the right words to say. 

She helped me stand up and supported me all the way to the couch, where I finally laid down and released the tension from my stiffened muscles. Seizures usually left me completely exhausted and sore.  

She sat down on the floor next to the couch, and we exchanged a long, wordless stare. Her eyes were again clear and bright. Before I drifted in a dreamless heavy sleep, I remember I felt so grateful to have her by my side.   I didn’t deserve it.   But the warmth I felt in my chest, contrarily to before, felt so nice.   And I was pretty sure she was the cause of it. 

[kkaewrites]

good as strangers [1] — chigiri hyoma x reader !

warnings. ooc chigiri, slight angst.

content. no strings attached, let’s not fall in love.

it was a quiet night. a contrasting idea in comparison to your mind, which seemed to not silence itself even as you embraced the evening’s cold touch. in fact, the only time that your mind’s at peace is when you’re asleep. even you, l/n y/n, get tired of that sometimes.

or maybe you’re just genuinely tired of it all.

you wanted to say that you’re just a frustrated tennis player; that there’s no way you’re falling out of love with the sport. it’s less cruel to say and definitely something you’d get over. you wanted to at least think that at this point, you’re not just watering a dead plant.

however, as you stare down at your calloused hands, your stomach sinks. it wasn’t a sight to see. it didn’t feel good, either. and your mind screams at you once again: maybe you just don’t love tennis anymore.

you wanted to scream, but at the same time you wanted to bawl. tennis has long been a part of you; it was something you were used to since you were a kid. it was the only thing that’s constant in your world. it makes you feel safe. how can you get tired of your one comfort? is that even possible?

the silence of the night ensues. your mind wanders.

the balance remains that way until you hear a soft shuffle of feet from behind you. it was too heavy to be a little kid and too light to be a full-grown man. there, you wished that it’s not someone you know, because you’re not sure you can handle their never-ending questions.

how do you feel? you could practically hear their voices echo. you’d answer fine, and then they’d say that it’s okay, sometimes we just lose like you haven’t thought of that fact before. it enrages you; not because you had just lost an important match, but because the loss itself isn’t making you feel anything. tennis doesn’t make you feel anything.

you win and it’s okay. you lose and it’s okay.

since when was tennis just an okay to you? it was once your world. it was once your everything. your mind wanders again and you forget that there’s a human being a few feet away from you.

you didn’t have the energy to turn around, expecting them pass by and go home. you didn’t bring anything with you aside from a lone tennis ball that you’ve been squeezing dry since earlier, but the starry skies and the starry city from below you indicates that it’s something past 8. it was late. they’re definitely just someone passing by.

their footsteps stop and you internally curse. was it really someone you knew?

agitated, you wait for the person to call out to you or ask you, for the umpteenth time today, how are you? but it doesn’t come. instead, the person settles to stand on your far left without a word. from your peripheral vision, you could see their tuft of red hair and the color of a uniform you know too well.

the person doesn’t speak. no, this person doesn’t even acknowledge or regard you. silence swallows up the both of you, and it’s refreshingly relieving. being in the company of this person doesn’t force you to engage in a conversation. you’re not even forced to at least look at them; but in their presence, you exist. with your presence, they exist. that was enough.

you spent at least half an hour wallowing in silence until you decided to head home— mind still in haywire. the person on your left remained to watch over the city, but you don’t spare them at least a goodbye as you walked away. it was then did you finally realize that he’s chigiri hyoma, the former football genius.

what a waste.

you concluded that your life’s nothing but tedious work. your classes were boring. tennis practice was boring. answering homeworks were boring. it was too much of a problem; your mind doesn’t want to revel in the idea of boring. it doesn’t like anything else at this point. you’re scared that one day, you’d think living itself is boring.

you refused to head straight home after school and tennis practice, so at half past 6 o’clock, you let your feet lead you where to go. your phone vibrated from your pocket, which only told you to get away from the prying eyes of people because your friends were looking for you.

so, just like yesterday, you found yourself at the overlooking spot. chigiri hyoma was already there when you’ve arrived.

surprisingly, you’re not annoyed. however, you know that it’s only because he’s not the talkative kind and he minds his own business. you do notice that he’s carrying a sports bag, so just like you, he attended practice. you don’t say anything to him, though.

you placed your bag on the floor and took out a tennis ball, before leaning onto the rusty railing. it doesn’t bother you, but with chigiri’s furrow of brows, you thought that maybe it bothers him.

“what?” you snap, meeting his eyes. he stares at you for a good minute before he looks away, wordless. “you look like you have something to say.”

“no, i don’t.”

“then, what’s with the look?”

he doesn’t answer. you’re not sure what drove you to speak to him, but now that you had, it’s stupid that he’s not even responding.

“you’re l/n, right?”

“so?”

“you’re shorter than i originally thought.” he states, with no emotion or whatsoever. you feel as if he’s not entirely mocking you, but you’re insulted nonetheless. maybe the rumors were true; he is a stuck-up prince.

against your better judgement, you threw your tennis ball at him— but he catches it with ease, even when he isn’t facing you. he tosses the ball back to you without a word, although less harsh than what you’ve previously done.

“hmph.” you refuse to compliment him. why should you? he already takes pride of his athleticism. telling him something simple as “nice catch”, when that fact is already known and settled between the two of you, is redundancy. besides, you don’t want to fuel his ego further. he already has too much of that.

“nice throw,” he comments. “do you play baseball?”

it must be a joke, you thought. no one in their right mind would ask that, knowing what a tennis ball looks like. so, you decided to humor him for a bit. “no. what about you? how’s rugby?”

for unknown reasons, his face drops. “so you’ve heard of me.”

“obviously, mr. prodigy.” he turns to face you, and it’s the first time you’ve had a good look on his face. his pink, almost red, eyes bore into your e/c ones and for a few seconds, there was silence. your mind quiets down. all you can think is he’s undeniably pretty. so so pretty.

“what?” he tilts his head, unaware of your thoughts.

“you’re pretty.”

“excuse me?” his brow furrows, but the light tint on his cheeks says that he’s anything but offended.

“you’re surprisingly easy to fluster, mr. prodigy.”

“could you stop calling me that?” he turns away. “it gives me the ick.”

you shrug at his response and decided not to reply. your phone vibrated once again, indicating that you have received another text, which — like the previous ones —you ignored. silence swallows the both of you as the sky turns prussian blue. it calms you down. deep down, you think that chigiri hyoma might feel the same way.

“you love soccer.” was your greeting for chigiri hyoma upon seeing him. he’s got his back turned, his sports bag sitting comfortably on the floor with a soccer ball right next to it. that was your observation once you saw him at football practice earlier— there was fire in his eyes. it was hungry, relentless, and would eat up everything in its path. the ironic thing is, it’s the opposite of how he played.

you thought prodigies all end up like you— a burnt out player who only continues to play because it’s the only thing you’re good at. however, chigiri hyoma exists. someone who’s terribly in love with the thought of playing but limits himself because of his leg. he can’t play up to his full potential.

“you’re stalking me.” was his response.

“if i was stalking you, i would have known your birthday.” you coolly state, pocketing your hands. “i don’t.”

he turns to face you, a chuckle escaping his system. “so, what?”

“i said you love soccer.”

“and?”

“so play.”

he turns to the view from below, opting not to say anything. however, you weren’t satisfied with his response. you understand the stakes— if he tears his acl once again, he might never play. but if he doesn’t play now, where will that take him? where will he go?

“to be honest, i’m envious.” you piped up. “i miss having that kind of rush.”

he shrugs. “maybe you’re just not talented enough.”

“you haven’t seen me play.”

“are we supposed to be buddies now?” he questions.

“you’re a stranger to me, hyoma.” you answer. “and i don’t want to have more friends, anyway.”

“i don’t want to be friends with you, either.”

it could have hurt you. it could have offended you; who doesn’t want to be friends with l/n y/n? apparently, him. but instead of feeling bad about it, a rare giddy smile spreads onto your face. he doesn’t want to be friends with you, but the way you took it was: let’s marry.

there was something about strangers that always intrigued you. how far can one draw the line? how far can one know about another’s life, even as a stranger? your questions were endless, but it doesn’t matter. the answer’s right in front of you. the answer’s chigiri hyoma.

“then we’re good as strangers.”

“aren’t we?” he sarcastically implies.

“yeah. we don’t know anything about each other. except maybe our sports, but that’s common knowledge, right?” you held out your hand. “this is a stranger’s pact. i won’t tell your secrets so long as you won’t tell mine.”

it was your way of saying “we’re like friends but i can ghost you anytime and not feel bad about it”. to be honest, the only person that will benefit from a situation like this is you— but you’re hoping chigiri hyoma plays along. at least you’d have someone to talk to before you leave japan.

he stares at your outstretched hands for a good few seconds before saying, “do you do this to everyone you meet?”

“no. just you.”

his brow furrows before reluctantly taking your hand. the agreement was settled; his secrets will be yours, and yours, his. you, l/n y/n, wants to fall back in love with tennis. he, chigiri hyoma, wants to fall out of love with soccer. that’s the only thing you knew about each other. that’s the only thing you talked about. it’s the only thing that binds you.

“i’m quitting soccer.” chigiri hyoma’s words were nothing like his usual complaints about the wanima twins. it rung in your head like an old bell, and it reminds you that it’s what he’s planning all along. he wanted a reason to quit soccer. it was nothing but irony.

he wanted to quit the sport he loves. you wanted to play the sport you’ve fallen out of love from. from that, you guess, people really can’t have what they want.

“quitting soccer is quitting your dream to be a striker.” was what you respond with. your h/c hair sways with the wind and it grows colder. it makes you feel sad that chigiri was quitting. you knew how much he wanted to play.

“i know.”

“so, why do it?”

“it feels right.” he sighs. “and it’s not like i can play like before.”

“then about that blue lock letter...”

“i’ll see what it’s about.”

instead of the night’s silence, it is noise that engulfs your mind; yet again, it wanders. this time, it’s not about tennis. it’s not about school. it’s not about your parents. it’s not about your friends. tonight, its noise was caused by chigiri hyoma.

irony appears; chigiri has never caused such turmoil within you. that was the reason why you particularly liked his presence, because he keeps your mind settled. this time, however, it’s the opposite.

“do you think i shouldn’t quit?” he questions.

from the nights and nights of brutal honesty, even though you wouldn’t call yourselves as “friends”, somehow, you knew him like the back of your hand. this time, he’s asking if his decision upsets you. and while you do think that him quitting will be a waste of talent and effort, you won’t go as far as to hinder him from choosing his own path.

“would you continue on playing if i told you to?”

there’s a beat of silence before he mumbles, “i might, yeah.”

“how honest.”

the crickets appears and the wind howls, swaying your hair in the process. chigiri’s hair is braided neatly like how it’s always done— you itch to ask him who taught him so, but you remember that the only thing you’re allowed to know about him is his secrets. the only thing you’re allowed to know about him is soccer. maybe it’s best to keep it that way.

“would you like that?”

“what?”

“honesty.” he answers.

“sure.” was your absent-minded reply. in what way will he be more honest about soccer? you’re pretty sure he has told you about everything already. he has told you about the day he first outran everybody. he has told you that what he loves most about soccer is when he feels that ‘rush’. he has told you about the annoying wanima twins, who seemed to pester him nonstop about his previously injured knee. what’s there to know?

“i’m terrified,” he starts. it was quiet for a few minutes, and you were about to ask him what it is he’s terrified of, until he faces you to continue: “of you.”

you wanted to laugh, but the seriousness plastered on his face might as well indicate he’s confessing a sin. his reddish pink eyes bore into yours; it was so clear that you can see your reflection on them. and for the first time, you are unaware of what chigiri hyoma is thinking.

“i think i might be in love with you.” he finally says. “it’s terrifying.”

the crickets disappear. the winds quiet down. the world stops— your world stops. all you could hear was your own rapid heartbeats, it rang in your ears and it was too much noise. you feared that he would hear it, too.

“hyo, i—” your phone rang from your bag. you both turned to face where the noise was coming from, and you glanced at him as if to ask, is it okay for me to get that? he nods as if to say i don’t mind.

grumbling quietly, you searched through your bag for your phone. you have no idea why it’s ringing now, of all times. and you have no idea why it’s even ringing because your phone is on do not disturb 24/7. it was a bad timing.

and what would you even reply to chigiri? no, scratch that, you knew what you’re going to say— you just don’t know how to. if you tell him you liked him too, where will that lead? how will it go? everything is just noise, noise, noise.

you don’t know how long you stood there, trying to make sense of the messages that were from your parents. you have read them five— no, maybe twenty-five times— hoping that you’re misreading it all. hoping that the skies aren’t punishing you yet again.

“you okay?”

“i’m leaving japan.” you thought it’d sound believable if it came from your own lips, but it was proven to be difficult. your voice was the second thing that betrayed you; your mind was the first. you still can’t wrap your head around the fact that you’re leaving now, of all times.

“oh.” chigiri lets out. “when will you be leaving?”

“tonight.”

“huh,” he’s surprisingly taking it well, unlike you. was he fine that you’d be leaving like this, after all the things he said earlier? was it really fine for him? from the back of your mind, it says: maybe. “will you come back?”

“they didn’t say.”

he looks away. silence comes around like clockwork, and for the first time, you wanted noise to envelope the both of you. you wanted him to speak, about anything at all, just so you won’t drown in this sea of silence. you wanted to forget about all these and tell him that you like him too, but you can’t open your mouth to say anything. your whole body has now betrayed you.

“you should go pack.”

“yeah. i should.”

when you turned your back against him, his confession forgotten in the midst of the wind, you didn’t dare look back. you knew that if you had taken a second good look on his pretty face, you wouldn’t have continued on your path. you wouldn’t have left japan for the sake of playing tennis. you wouldn’t have packed your bags, heart numb and mind blank of everything that has happened today.

and then you understood what it meant to be strangers. you understood what “no strings attached” meant; but it was still as ironic as ever. if your agreement was to have no relation with each other or whatsoever, then why does every step you take feel heavy? why does every path feel like it’s leading you back to him?

to be able to play tennis. to have chigiri hyoma as nothing but a stranger. that was all there is to it.

notes. HAPPY HOLIDAYS <3 this was sitting on my drafts for far too long & i never had enough creativity to finish it so i hope it’s... like... okay? LOL idk i don’t feel satisfied with this one yet so i’m hoping that i can write part 2 better so i can at least make up for it.

ִ ࣪𖤐 masterlist ! • ִ ࣪𖤐 next !

[throwaway-yandere]

Sunshowers (Yandere!Ei/Reader)

A/n: (reposted cause im confused on how tumblr works and it wont let me add spaces) Ahh big mood anon. Thought about this idea before as well but didn't know how to expand on it. I'm not entirely familiar with Japanese (and Inazuman) mythos & culture so please inform me if I got things off because my search history is getting weirder. And I didn't know what vision you wanted anon so I let wheel of names dot com decide lolol. Also sorry if this story is off, I wrote the draft around 3 am and slept lmao

gn!reader

cw: yandere ei. kidnapping

-------

How could you prevail in a confrontation with Ei if you don't even have the upper hand against the puppet, Raiden Shogun?

After being soundly defeated near the Statue of the Omnipresent God, Ei herself appeared to patch you up. She took you into her world and made it clear that she was unequivocally surprised by the turn of events. Despite choosing not to let trivial concerns cloud her judgment, Ei still finds this scene to be oh-so-heartbreaking.

Her plane of Euthymia appeared hostile and dim when you first arrived. The atmosphere remained the same until you consented to receive her treatment. Afterward, the realm then grew increasingly vibrant and pinkish, and whenever you acknowledged her presence, it seemed as though iridescent rays were trailing behind her.

This disgustingly cheerful environment gradually contributed to your increasing contempt for her illiterate viewpoints. Maybe you would have kept your lips shut if her consciousness wasn't so obviously delighted in keeping you company.

"(Y/n), please stay still..."

She started to cover your wound with a cloth, and you recoiled in pain.

You mustn't look up because you are Shoguji¹ (Y/n) and not Guuji Yae. It's not like you also want to stare into Ei's eyes. All that will be sharing your gaze are eyes that perfectly resemble your one and only master, and you cannot stomach the thought of it. She is not the Archon who took you in during times of famine. You are Makoto's dearest snow-white fox² and the parallel Ei's reddish-pink familiar.

Even if you frequently confide in Guuji Yae about your problems, it seems the trickster won't be of assistance. In reality, she may have stopped hoping for your safe return. Despite being more than a few centuries older than her, you have lost much of your previously sharp wit and piercing gaze thanks to numerous traumatic incidents. Nevertheless, you didn't give up on the Inazuma that the public desired. You cannot allow the blueprint of what your master Makoto intended to be destroyed by her twin and handcrafted playthings.

Raiden Makoto once said to "never stop searching, even for a brief flash of light. If nothing else, we have the present moment." And in this "present moment", you cannot let these children suffer from an Archon's half-baked ideals.

And if the Tri-commission and the renowned traveler refused to join the resistance, then so be it.

"Did you hope your foolhardiness will shelter those who invoked a revolution? It is only through my mercy that the Shogun spared you." Ei spoke softly. "Oh, (Y/n)... Had I not programmed her to protect you, you would find yourself in a more... Excruciating state."

"Can you not for the very least display gratitude for that?" She said, almost remorseful. Not in a way where she regrets her transgressions, but more of how she regrets getting you involved.

Her pained expression disgusts you.

Why does she have more sympathy for an inari fox over the many mortals who loyally offered fares and served her stead? An inari who had the fortune to control the water element?

You coughed up. No matter how much you tried to grin and suck it up, the blood managed to get out of your system. This only sparked more worry from the Archon.

If only you could use your hydro vision to heal yourself. But Ei snatched your vision the moment you entered her realm.

Should've expected that from someone who thought a Vision Hunt Decree is a bright idea.

"You..." Another cough echoed in her vast and lonely domain. "You're not this blind... Are you, Beelzebul?"

Ei blinked.

"Pardon me?"

"The people of Inazuma aren't thriving from your stiff regulations." You said. "You do not even trust your own people. I am aware that this will come across as treacherous, but is it not unfair that you only took my vision but not Yae's as well? You are aware that this was her plan, right?"

The Archon stayed silent.

You laughed humorlessly. "Doesn't that sound like nepotism, Ei?"

"It is."

Your eyes widened, not expecting an honest reply. Ei didn't believe her statements were particularly noteworthy based on her expressionless stare. You steeled yourself and laughed.

"I'm glad you're self-aware. I wonder how far I can push that..."

"I do play favorites, but not in the way you think."

You concentrated on her eyes.

You're unsure about whatever made you so terrified to look at them. At first glance, they do resemble Makoto's, but what mirrors deep within was a far cry from her gentleness.

"If I favored Yae, I would've ripped the electro vision dangling from her ears."

Shame on you for failing to remember that, out of the two siblings, Raiden Ei has experienced the worst effects of war.

No matter how calmly Ei said it, the image of having a part of Yae's earlobe violently torn made you cringe.

Ei sighed. "I can read your expression, (Y/n)–"

You huffed. "Ah, then it appears my acting skills have grown rusty–"

"–I'm aware that my words are not making sense at the moment. But, let us put it this way..."

She tilted your chin with her slender fingers.

"Your individual ambition is becoming a threat to Inazuma's goal of eternity."

Your natural instinct was to reach for your belt, but your vision was no longer in reach.

"You have already lost a lot in your pursuit." She didn't have to say anything, but it is clear that she was alluding to your seized vision. "And if each step forward meant that something will be lost, isn't it high time that Inazuma remain static as it is now?"

The situation dawned on you.

"I've already lost her. And I cannot allow myself to lose you too."

Oh.

So this was the game Ei was playing.

"You're..." You chuckled nervously. "You're not going to do what I think you're doing, correct?"

"I was there when Makoto tamed you." She said.

"I strangely recall how she deliberately robbed your vision to prevent you from rushing to her aid five hundred years ago." Ei took one step forward, and you stepped back twice. "I don't seem to be feeling any signs of erosion, because memory serves that you have lost most of your wits in that time. It was my sister who incapacitated you so you wouldn't join her on the battlefield. To Khaenri'ah."

"Almighty Raiden Shogun..." Makoto...

"Ah, so it's Almighty Raiden Shogun now, and not Ei?" She combed your stray hairs back. "We are good friends. I don't need to remind you that."

"Please..." 

Your breath paced irregularly as you timidly grasped the hem of her sleeves. 

You're no longer as cunning as you used to be. There are no tricks nor schemes hiding beneath your sleeves.

All you can do now is beg.

"G-give me my vision back..."

"I was on the front lines five hundred years ago too." Ei continued to ignore you as she rambled on. "And yet, your primary concern has always been my sister instead of me. Why is that? Is it because you have complete faith in my capabilities? It doesn't seem to be the case. It is always I who starts the conversation first, despite living in my sister's shadow."

"E-Ei..."

"If not that, then it couldn't be that you favored the company of my sister over mine, could it? It was I, Raiden Ei, and not Raiden Makoto, who introduced you to Kitsune Saiguu, brought you on picnics with our mutual friends, and spared you the last tricolor dango each time. It was all Raiden Ei. I do not recall my sister spoiling you as much as I did."

And such actions are supposed to make her entitled to your loyalty and affections? You didn't dare question it out loud. The fear of losing your vision– losing yourself– once more is prominent. One's sharp memory is a kitsune's pride. You already lost more than enough of that.

As if to make you steady, Ei cupped your cheeks with both hands. Her lavender eyes softened. 

"Stay." 

Her fingers tightly clutched your side, and you felt her breath tickle your ear.

"Stay, and I shall have you reborn as my spouse that deserved to see Inazuma as the land of Eternity in the present moment and the next. Be my forever."

From then on, you lost sight of who you are. Permanently, this time.

And Raiden Ei made sure of it.

 ------

Ei smiled as she gingerly ran her fingers through your hair. Your eyes were closed as you indulged yourself in her soothing ministrations. She hummed to herself. This is exactly where she needed you to be, laying down peacefully on her lap.

"Won't you take a peek at the outside world, (Y/n)?" She said.

You rolled over and looked at the reflection sluggishly. The water outside seemed to be soothing. You were drawn in by the splashes it made.

You were, nonetheless, strangely uneasy. It appeared as though you had previously held the element in the palm of your hands until it was stolen from you...

"It's a sunshower. I believe this is what you and Yae call 'kitsune no yomeiri'³, is it not?"

... Sunshower?

You could only stare blankly.

Yae? Kitsune no yomeiri?

You returned your gaze back to the puddles outside.

How would you be able to answer? After all, you have never heard of those terms before. It's not as if those unique syllables had any significance for you.

... Did they?

"It's time that I have my bridal procession. I may be the God of Eternity, but you have kept me waiting long enough, my forever."

-----

Notes:

¹ Can't find much about shrine maidens, but shoguji seems to be the head shrine priest's assistant(?)

² Snow-white inari foxes seem to be "good and kind" in mythologies so I added that (the rest of the myth is angsty and i love it lol

³ "Kitsune no yomeiri" or "The Fox's Wedding" often refers to sunshowers since people believe it's a trick caused by kitsune-s.

[sarah-yyy]

okay okay just word-vomiting about some work stuff because i need to say it or i'll probably die, y'all can just ignore this!!

so like late last week i made a mistake on one of my files, and ended up with like a $15,000 deficit at hand. like i didn't pick up on this at all until monday evening, just as i was leaving the office, and i've been high key stressed out about this since because. it's v obviously a me mistake, like. i'm not someone who would shift blame even in cases where i could, but in this case it was p cut and dry, it was definitely me that caused this $15,000 problem.

thankfully tho!! this was a fixable problem, so i manned up, told mr r i made a mistake, and started working on recovering the funds. emailed the lawyer acting for the other side, called my client to explain the situation and to let him know i'll resolve the issue, etc etc.

client was super nice about it!! he's one of my regulars, one of the ones who really trusts/values my advice, and he's so...predisposed to thinking that i can't really do anything wrong that his first instinct was that someone else caused the problem, so ofc he goes and calls the guy on the other side and says hey look what is this about my lawyer telling me that i've been shortpaid (this was not what i said, but this was what he took away from the convo 😂) and thankfully!! the other guy was a p decent guy too, and went alright i'll pop the money through to my lawyer rn who will then pay it to your lawyer, alg buddy.

all of that was fine!! problem resolved!! stress levels went down a lot once my client told me the funds were coming!! this was like tuesday afternoon.

but!!! a whole 24 hours later, i still wasn't seeing any money from the other lawyer (let's call him mr p). flicked him an email to follow up. no response. left him a message on the phone. no response. the whole time my blood pressure was just going ↗. i talk to mr r about it, mr r said look we can't go too hard at this since this was an us mistake, but we need some kind of acknowledgement from mr p that he is in funds and will pay the money back to us.

this morning, after speaking to my client and mr r, i emailed mr p to say that we need the funds in our trust account by COB or we'll need to talk to our client about alternative recovery action. it wasn't like a rude email. i toned it down a lot and was super polite. copied in mr r so mr p can see there is some sort of Escalation from our end.

mr p replies several hours later telling me two things: 1) the funds will be paid to us soon, and 2) not to send him threatening emails because fixing my problem is not on his priority list??????????

buddies. BUDDIES. i haven't slept properly since monday night. like. i know mr p has no obligation towards me. but. you can imagine the kind of stress i've been under since monday. i'm lucky this happened with a good client who wasn't badgering me to front the money and to demand that i take responsibility or anything, but even then, this was an incredibly stressful situation. if this had happened to any other lawyer, i'd have done whatever i could to at least alleviate that stress for them even just a little bit. but mr p!!! has had the funds sitting with him since wednesday morning!! and cbf to at least tell me that until thursday afternoon!!! who tf does that!!! why tf would you do that!!! even if it's out of collegial respect, why couldn't he have at least dropped me a line to say hey funds are here dw i'm busy now but will pay you soon?????

i'm just. so !!! about this whole thing. i'm probably slightly overreacting because i've been stressed and i'm underslept but fuck, i don't think i'm wrong to be upset at mr p 🥺

[cainfortea]

Ep7 Siuan Changes

I'm going to preface this by mentioning this is going to be full book spoilers. Also, while this may read as a defense, it's less of that and more of an exploration of the changes made and what avenues that they open up going forward in a way to internalize what happened in the show and to look for silver linings. I'm not really SOLD on the big change here. But so far the show has shown that they're usually thinking ahead on these changes so I'll just have to wait and see. Book spoilers here on.

Part The First - This episode was bigly about making the hard choices you think are right. Anvaere does it with Barthanes, talks about how that's Moiraine operates. And nothing Siuan says is incorrect. Moiraine absolutely failed in her part. And instead of changing tack (sailing metaphor), or at least telling Siuan so they can come up with someone else to take her place, she hid that knowledge and tried to go it alone. Part Deux - Character Involvement. The books in general, and this show especially, is being driven by our attachment to the characters. Later on in the series, when Siuan is helping Egwene become the Amyrlin, she mentions her failings. How she just ran roughshod over people. By doing things the way they did in the show, it's a lot more direct. When (if) she says something like that in the show, we're going to remember that scene specifically because of how much it impacts Moiraine and Siuan as people. Number Three - In the books, the tower coup comes as a surprise. That seemed a very extreme reaction. In the show, it'll be easier to show exactly how it goes down. She even spells it out. "Tower law says we cage the Dragon Reborn". Well, she failed. Now the Coup is going to be a direct result of stuff we saw on screen. Gone Too Far Four - To me, the tower split was very much set up as a good guy/bad guy split. The deposing of Siuan happened under circumstances that went against tower rules in the vote to remove her, and so everyone who stayed is already compromised. Weather out of fear, or a feeling that a whole tower is more important in these times, every Aes Sedai who stayed compromised themselves. How they all deal with those feelings and whatever self deceptions they use, happens a lot in their heads. Which is harder to do on a TV show. This way, it's clear. Now when the split happens, they can do it along the lines of "While Siuan was deposed legally, we really don't think a Red should be Amyrlin just right now, she is definitely going to fuck this up". Which is a lot easier to explain on screen and paint a group with a wide brush. 4.5 - Very similar to 4 but in a legally distinct manner, once the tower is healed, in the books, a big part of bringing them together is Egwene making the rebels apologize for rebelling. Which always seemed like a weird cop out to me. In the books, as I mentioned, the split seemed very much a goodguy/badguy split. And this solution is just some posturing that seemed very centrist in a "Doesn't acknowledge the actual problem but makes a bunch of people feel better" kind of way. By making it an idealogical split, the rebels actually would be rebels. So this scene would play off better.

Five - A part of Siuan's later story is her coming to grips with her failure. And while, yes it is true the captain of a ship that mutinies is 100% responsible for that mutiny, we never really see the lead up to it in the books. Now, we're there with her as she does it. Should she have trusted Moiraine like she had almost her whole life? Should she have remembered how to embrace Saidar and realized she can't force the water? (In this part i'm pretty sure it's no accident that she compares Rand to the Water that Turns the Wheel). These are things we'll be seeing her wrestle with in the future. Maybe.

[nonmonogamy-culture-is]

Rules vs Agreements vs Boundaries

I see these confused a lot, so here’s a simple guide to them!

Rules:

Rules are things put in place to control someone else’s behavior, whether that be a partner, a metamour, or anyone else. (Yes, it’s still a rule if you have to follow it too). Rules are strict and breaking them always has some kind of punishment involved. The punishment can be anything, maybe something decided in advance (If you do X, I’ll do Y), or even just the fight you’ll get into when it’s broken. Some examples of rules in non-monogamous relationships are:

1. You can only be with people as long as I approve, and you have to dump them if I say so (veto power)

2. We can only date cis women (one-penis-policy)

3. We have to spend at least 4 nights a week together

4. No sleeping with someone else unless I’ve met them first

5. Always be home by 11:00 PM

Now, it is possible to have healthy rules in a relationship, don’t get me wrong. However, it’s also common for rules to cause resentment and mistrust in relationships. Before making a rule, please consider where you are coming from with the rule. Most rules come from places of fear, mistrust, or insecurity. You may be making assumptions about how your partner will treat you without the rule in place, assuming the worst. Once you identify the feeling behind a proposed rule, you can attack the problem at its source instead of using a rule to cover it up. It’s similar to jealousy, in that respect. If you and your partner agree the rule comes from a good and constructive place, then you have a good rule.

Agreements:

Agreements are the hardest to pin down and describe, in my opinion. Agreements are trusting each other and acknowledging each other’s needs and your commitment to meeting those to the best of your abilities. Multiamory describes the difference between the philosophy of agreements and rules as, “A philosophy of communication and trust, as opposed to a philosophy of restriction and requirement”. Please remember that the philosophy and intent behind what you and your partner agree to is more important than the language used. Regardless of whether you call it a rule or an agreement, it’s the intent that makes it healthy or unhealthy. Possible agreement alternatives to the rule examples are:

1. We will trust each other’s judgment in our other relationships, and we’ll be aware of and work through any jealousy they cause

2. We will work together to unpack the insecurities the one who set the rule had, and take agreed upon baby steps towards dating other men and/or people with penises to help ease them into the change while we work through this insecurity

3. We will spend deliberate time together each week and not take our living together for granted

4. We will stay safe during sex and be open and transparent with each other about our sex practices, and we will communicate about and work through our jealousy and insecurities together

5. We will trust each other to be safe and responsible while out, and we will keep each other updated about when we will get home and if we’ll be late so not to cause worry

Boundaries:

Boundaries are things that you can enforce all on your own. They are self-empowering, unlike rules, which give all of the power to the other person. Boundaries are a healthy way to protect yourself and a staple in all relationships. Some examples of boundaries in relationships are:

1. I will not stay in a relationship with someone who is abusive

2. I will not have unprotected sex with someone who is having unprotected sex with other people 

3. I will not stay in a relationship with someone who smokes

4. I will not stay in a relationship with someone who is deceptive

5. I will not share intimate details about my other relationships with my other partners unless it directly affects them and/or our sexual safety

The only issue with boundaries is how easy it is to turn them into threats. Going back to example number three, this can be turned into a threat by saying “If you don’t stop smoking, I will leave you”. This manipulative and controlling behavior, and it puts the power back into the partners hands, so it is no longer self-empowering. It stops being a boundary entirely, both because of the power shift, the intent behind it, and the fact that you’re still in the relationship. Boundaries are the final defense. If your boundary is broken and you don’t enforce it, and instead choose to turn it into a threat to control your partner, it loses everything that makes it a boundary and becomes another way to take control. You can avoid this by making sure the focus stays on you, what you’re comfortable with, and what you’ll do to take care of yourself. Always be honest with yourself about your intentions, and never be afraid to enforce a boundary. Keeping yourself safe is more important than the relationship and/or action that is compromising that.

For more information, I highly suggest the Multiamory podcast episode “Rules vs. Agreements feat. Boundaries”. It goes a little more in-depth than I did, and it was my main resource when writing this post.

[thunderwetter]

Ooh what about cosmos

Who? No, just kidding, poor Cosmos, always ignored by his comrades. We won't ignore him though, so let's go!

TLDR; - Has to be lured out of his shell, insecure and doesn't think he's desirable - Once he's convinced, he reveals himself as touch-starved - Likes to be the center of attention and be spoiled and serviced - Enjoys tactile a lot - Being a top makes him cocky, even mean at times - Would never be violent, he'd never risk scaring someone away - Thinks voyeurism is boring, visual stimuli are not his thing

Curious about other characters? My ask box is open!

Longer version:

Cosmos, despite his courageous personality, is quite often dismissed by his comrades and I feel like that is bound to lead to a whole bunch of problems regarding self-value and confidence. He doesn't really feel like anyone would take interest in him and he also doesn't want to be a bother, so he's a bit held back in that regard. I imagine he'd be a bit difficult to chat up, but once he realizes that there's no ill intent, he'd become flattered and chattier. I feel like at parties he'd start real quiet, but after a few drinks he'd be prone to getting into trouble. Don't get the UFO drunk, guys, he will be a problem. Maybe not yours, but someone else's.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think he's easy to get into berth or anything, I actually think it'd take quite a bit of talk to even convince him that he's attractive, but once his partner has him in his grasp, oh boy he will not let go. He'd be soft as butter underneath someone else's servos. Due to his missions usually isolating him from everybody else, he's gotten seriously touch-starved, leading to him being reeeally clingy at times.

In berth, he'd start out as a shy one, unsure of where to put himself, but once he feels comfortable, he'd regain his confidence and become more active. He's used to only following orders without any acknowledgement, but give him the okay and he'd become almost demanding. He enjoys being the center of attention for once and it gets him off massively if this is played into. Cosmos strikes me as the kinda guy who just absolutely loves to be spoiled rotten and pampered and peppered with kisses and affection.

These two things I believe would combine into a general preference for tactile play and also servicing that is not direct interface, so oral service and the likes of it. He has a looot of sensors that crave to be touched, so his partner could have a lot of fun just touching him in all kinds of places~

I think if he tops a partner that's noisy or otherwise very open about showing pleasure, he'd get quite cocky and start to talk dirty, even throw some degradation in here and there. He's so used to taking everybody's shit and has a lot of pent-up anger. He wouldn't get violent or cruel, never, but he would become a little mean. It would feel good to not be on the short end of the stick for once, but he's also very intent on not scaring anyone away.

Despite being a surveillance bot, which a lot of other bots expect to be into voyeurism, he actually does not see any value in it. Watching becomes boring when it's your ob, at least from his POV. That's why visual stimuli in general don't really do it for him. He'd much rather shut his optics and concentrate on his other senses!

Aaand yeah I think that's it for Cosmos, thanks a lot for asking about him! I can already imagine some bots that he'd get along with well 👀