#chisaki overhaul

[anime-as-textposts]

[chisakifiles]

everybody say happy birthday chisaki

[raitonsfw]

𝓈𝓎𝓃𝑜𝓅𝓈𝒾𝓈: Chisaki had some time before his sadistic ordeals, leaving you planted on his thigh with a towel underneath you. How long could you last as you rutted against him, his hand welting against your ass to show his dominance over you? Not long, you deemed.

warnings: 18+ mdni, sut, fem!reader, whipped!reader, mean!chisaki, thigh riding, spanking, hand marks, masochism, commands, dirty talk (moreso mocking), edging/orgasm denial, use of chisaki's quirk (to stop reader from touching herself), thoughts of dirtying chisaki (reader gets off on it), chisaki's very much in character with his germaphobia, pet name-ish (pretty pet), lot going on in such a tiny word count oops.

a/n: this was one of my FAVORITE thirsts to write, holy crap; I fucking adore this man, ive watched the shie hassaikai arc sooo many times. its by far my favorite arc ever of my hero academia alongside the current manga arc. i was screaming with joy when i saw the chisaki thirst come in, hehe. wc: 600ish. v-day m.list | m.list

thirst count: 1

divider credit: @hitobaby & @firefly-graphics

“You’re lucky to be sitting on my lap right now…” Chisaki sneered and honestly, you were lucky; even if he did lay a towel down against his thigh so he wouldn’t itch with insanity. His plague mask rendered useless to you, all you wanted to do was pull it off and actually see him speak in his uttered tone but you knew he wouldn’t allow your hand to so much as raise if you did so. 

“Pretty pet, am I right? Go on, use my thigh sweetheart.” He commanded wryly, his gloved palms hovering over your body but he didn’t dare touch. 

You had been stripped down to your lace panties, a long black shirt covering the swell of your ass and you felt so exposed in the cold room he had you cornered in. It was downtime for him, something he so desperately needed and lucky for you, he brought you along to keep him company. What you didn’t expect was to beg for his attention and ultimately end up on his lap, your cunt dripping onto the pristine towel that covered his lap. 

You wonder how fast he’d throw you off if it was his bare thigh, the slick soaking through his trouser’s fabric and you felt yourself start to move against his thigh at the thought of it. You wanted to get him dirty, the lace of your undergarments rubbing deliciously against your clit and you let out a quiet moan. As you grinded against him, he watched with molten eyes that glistened with every move you made. His eyelashes stuck out in your vision and you averted your gaze from him, a deep blush spreading against your cheeks.

“Oh, shy aren’t we? C’mon, you can do better than that…” Chisaki’s gloved hand came down, striking you hard against the flesh of your ass and you yelped out– holy fuck, he actually touched you. “Go faster, doll.” 

You wanted him to touch you again– your cunt sliding directly against his thigh now and you so desperately wanted to lay your arms on him and just take it, but what would that even get you? Disassembled and rearranged to your heart’s content, the thought pillowing your mind as you sped up your movements. The ache of your cunt against his thigh made you woozy and you felt your orgasm rushing towards you, the dull pleasure building between your thighs. 

You could feel yourself trembling against his leg and a harsh sigh breathed above you as you started to drag your pussy in tight circles, dredging up any type of friction you could get. You were mad, you thought– pure mad as you snuck your hand down towards the front of your panties but Chisaki’s quirk was faster and he reassembled your hand back where it should’ve been in the first place– behind your back and unable to move. You yelped at the sting from the use of his quirk, but were thankful he didn’t use it for bad intentions; just to rein you in from your impending orgasm. 

This only accelerated the heat that threatened to swallow you whole, a simpered smile casting over your face and you were so so close to cumming all over his leg– such cleanliness about to be deduced to nothing but a muddled mess. Your high raced up your spine and you let out a string of whimpers, his name falling from your lips as you felt the coil pull and–

His palm stopped you, a loud smack echoing off the bland walls.

“Ah, enough. Slow down.” Chisaki instructed, a bit of paranoia seeded within his voice and he brought his hand down again, this time leaving a welted mark and you jumped– no, relished at the pain that bit at your ass harshly. “I didn’t say you could cum all over me, now did I? Know your place, Y/N.”

[cut3blush]

The House Wife

Warrnings: smut

Authors note: Kai Chisaki has a face that you just wanna sit on

Chisaki loves having you as his cute little housewife. He buys you so many things like expensive jewelry, cute dresses, and shoes. And the most important thing is high-grade A quality cleaning supplies. Sometimes if he’s in a good mood and you finished all of your weekly chores he’ll take you out to a fancy dinner as a reward for all your hard work and good behavior. It was the rare occasion that Chisaki day off from “work”. But it was also the day you’d be the busiest due to the number of chores you had today.

So you wake up earlier than him to make him a big breakfast consisting of a well balanced meal. Chisaki woke up to the smell of coffee. After doing his morning routine he sees his precious wife wearing a swing dress fitting it on all the right places. Your neck is adorned with pearls and matching earrings. He pulls your waist your back pressed against his chest he pulls down his mask and kisses your neck. You hear the sound of the toast popping out of the toaster. You grab Chisaki’s hand and lead him to his chair and serve him his breakfast.

After the two of you finished your breakfast Chisaki tells you that he was going to read in his study for a bit while you do some chores you nod and watched your husband walk away. While Chisaki was reading you did a few chores like washed the dishes and dusted a few items around the house what you didn’t know was that Chisaki had tiny cameras installed all over the house.

That way he knows your safe and sound. He loves watching you prance around the house cleaning and how you sleep in his shirts when he’s away. Chisaki sat on his chair taking out his phone and opening the app where he can see the cameras. After flipping through them he found what he was looking for. His wife cleaning the windows her plush tits pressed against them.

Chisaki undos his belt and pulls down his zipper he takes out his member with precum dribbling on the slit. He wraps his hand around his prick his thumb rubbing the tip. His other hand fondling his heavy balls. He starts to rub up and down his length. He thinks you look so delicious with you all pressed on the glass. He starts to roughly pull on his cock while biting his lower lip. He just wants to press you more against that glass and slam right into your tiny pussy he doesn’t care if anyone sees he’s far into deep in his lustful desires.

Chisaki lets out a few breathy moans as he starts to stroke his cock faster. Until his cum splatters onto his short. After Chisaki falls from his high he cringes at the mess he made and changed his shirt and take a shower after he goes to find you. You scrub the floor instead of using a mop because the mop just won’t do but some good old fashion elbow grease will do the trick. You get on your hands and knees scrubbing the floor.

Chisaki sees you on your hands and knees ready for him. His once soft member starts to swell up again. He slowly gets behind you. He grabs your hips grinding on them. You turn back to see your husband. He starts kissing your neck. You tell Chisaki that you need to finish cleaning the floor. He starts lifting your dress seeing his favorite frilly panties. He slowly pulls them down your slick sticking to them. He rubs your plush lips as his other gloved hand gropes your tits. You start to grind on his finger. He tells you how much he’s been neglecting you and that he misses the way you feel around him. Chisaki flips you on your back he rips the buttons from your dress.

He unclips your bra squishing your tits together. He leans down to kiss you, your lipstick smearing all over as your tongues dance together. Your hand goes down to his pants you feel his hard cock. Chisaki looks at you and tells how pretty you look with your lipstick all smudged as his thumb cresses your cheek.

Chisaki pulls down his quickly undoes his belt and zipper he takes out his cock it’s standing up proudly. He pulls you on top of him. Your face looking right at his monstrous cock. He spreads your lips looking at the tiny hole. He lowers down his mask and his tongue enters your hole as his fingers grace your clit you take his cock in your mouth. He starts to move his hips upwards stuffing your mouth with his cock you quickly breathe with your nose. Chisaki pulls his head back letting out an airy moan.

He inserts two fingers inside of you. You stroke his cock vigorously sucking on his tip he holds your hips to his face as he tells you to cum together. Your juices squirt all over his face. While you try your best to drink the amount of milk he’s giving you. Chisaki slaps your ass telling you to be a good girl and to get on your hands and knees he orders you to keep cleaning the floor since you made a mess as he fucks you like the little slut that you are. He slams his hard cock inside you. You arch your back sloppily scrubbing the floor he pulls on your hair as he leans down and kisses you, your smudged lipstick on his lips.

Chisaki grabs your hips and digs his nails deeper into you. You arch your back as Chisaki feels you getting tighter around him. You try to keep scrubbing but your arms give out. Your upper half is now on the flood, as Chisaki grabs you by, the arms and you’re now chest to back with him as he starts to thrust upwards. He hits the golden spot inside of you you tell Chisaki to go harder. He jackhammers into that spot his hand slides down noticing the slight bulge in your tummy.

He keeps hitting it pressing his large hand against the bulge. You arch your back telling Chisaki that you’re going to cum. He tells you to wait for him after a few sloppy thrusts he feels you cream around him as he shoots his load inside of you. Chisaki pulls out cum dripping into the floor. He kisses you and tells you that he’ll help you finish up your chores and to clean up the mess.

[fantasydaydreamers]

Not-So-Villainous Firsts

Summary: Dating a villain isn't easy, but experiencing those cute first moments with them makes it worth it. From first dates to first kisses...they'll make sure to make you feel special~

Word Count: 1,665

Warnings: None

Author's Note: I've had this in my drafts for a hot minute...I actually don't know why I never posted this. VILLAINS CAN BE SOFT AND CUTE TOO!

Shigaraki

Shigaraki came to your house in the evening with a bouquet of flowers, the hand on his face covering the obvious blush. Villian life kept him busy but he so desperately wanted to make more time for you and show you just how much he cared for you. It made him nervous, to ask you out on a date, but seeing your ecstatic smile made him deem it all worth it.

He had a crush on you for a while and building up the confidence to ask you out took the longest. Not like you made it easy for him. One day you would make flirty comments, and the next act like it never happened. You gave him multiple openings to take and he never followed through until now.

Since he is a villain, he thought long and hard about his options for date ideas. Broad daylight is inconvenient and just lacked common sense. 

But damn did he want it to be a special first date.

It wasn't until he was walking along a street one night, scoping out an empty building for potential future use when a scattered flyer hit him in the face. Almost turning it into ashes, the word 'carnival' caught his eye and a lightbulb went off in his head. 

"(Y/n)?" Shigaraki said your name quietly, sitting next to you on the couch.

"Hm?" You were currently rubbing moisturizer into his arms and hands, trying to help him fix his dry skin problem.

"Are you free this Friday?"

You glanced up and noticed he wasn't even looking at you, his voice wavering the tiniest bit. You bit back a smile that so desperately wanted to show. Finally. Finally! "Yes, I'm free."

"....Good. I'll be here to pick you up around six"

From there, Shigaraki made sure to send an anonymous note to the carnival threatening them to keep it open until late unless there would be no carnival in the morning. 

You don't know that though and you were oblivious to the paranoid workers that worked the rides until late into the night, their eyes constantly looking around.

"Ooh~ let's go up there!," you point up to the ferris wheel, dragging a shy Shigaraki along by his wrist.

The worker at the ferris wheel barely even looked at the two of you, Shigaraki being thankful that you were excited so it didn't raise suspicion.

The both of you settled in the two-seat carriage, you snuggling closer to Shigaraki as he gripped the bar securing you two in with four sweaty fingers.

"I had a really fun time tonight," you snuggle closer to Shigaraki as the ride started. 

"Y-yeah."

Shigaraki's voice was trembling and you wanted to 'awh' at how cute he sounded. The view of the carnival was coming into view as you two reached the top, the ride slowing to a stop as other people were getting off.

You turn towards Shigaraki with an eyebrow raised in expectation.

"D-don't do that, (Y/n)," he said, a blush covering his face cutely. "I can't handle it."

"Handle what?" You shyly respond, lowering your eyes as you meet his gaze.

Shigaraki inched closer, his eyes also lowering as you closed yours completely, waiting.

His face was bright red now, observing you for a second as you waited for him, unguarded with your eyes closed, completely trusting and open.

His heart pounded hard against his chest as he committed the sight to memory and closed the remaining distance.

Your first kiss with him was shared on top of the ferris wheel, a warm summer breeze washing over you two as your lips moved together.

The carnival ended up staying open all night.

Dabi

Dabi was a confident man when he asked you out, already knowing you had the hots for him but still, a part of him was nervous. He didn't date, obviously, mostly known for hooking up or one-night-stands whenever he felt like it. Dabi was busy helping the League and just never felt like he had the time or energy to put into a relationship.

Until you came along.

You were the first person that ever made him do a double-take and pique his interest. The way you had conversed with him like a normal human being instead of who he was made him highly suspicious at first. Why would he be blessed with an angel like you? He felt undeserving at first, making a mental note to not treat you like his past hook-ups because he knows a good one when he sees it.

He tells himself that, but something inside of him changed after meeting you. He felt softer and although that bothered him at first, you showed him a patience and kindness he never thought existed.

Dabi had walked you home one night and asked you if you were free the next night.

"No, I think I'm going to my side-dudes house. How about this weekend?" You turn to him in all seriousness, trying not to laugh at his dead-faced expression.

"Very funny. I'll be here at eight."

"Why so late?!" You ask his retreating back, whining even though your heart was racing.

"You'll see."

Dabi picked you up one night and took you out on the town. He brought you to small street areas filled with food vendors, people coming together to party with music blasting and laughter filling the air. It was a classic city boy move, but you didn't mind. He was a villain after all so he had to be careful not to be in daylight as much, so...this was the only thing he could think of.

You two had walked up to different stalls, trying different foods, and talked while walking through the city. It felt so comforting to be around him, considering he was one of the most wanted villains in the world.

"I honestly thought you were going to take me on one of your little schemes," you admit, drinking from your frozen strawberry lemonade.

Dabi side-eyed you while chewing on some teriyaki chicken. "Why would I get you involved in that? I don't want you to get hurt."

Your chest warmed and you smiled, bumping into his shoulder playfully. "I'm a tough girl! I think I can handle a bit of danger." Puffing out your chest, you purse your lips proudly.

The next thing you knew, Dabi was pulling you into an alley.

"Oh? Can you?"

His words were huskier as he had moved close in your space, starring you down. His blue irises were mesmerizing, pulling you into his gravitational pull. You didn't even realize you were leaning in, failing to notice the small teasing smirk on his lips. Dabi shuffled back a bit and that's what broke you out of your trace. Embarrassment flooded your face, as you also pulled back, flattening out against the wall.

Adverting your gaze, you try to walk away until his arm comes up, hand pressing against the wall as he blocks your exit.

"You didn't answer my question."

Reluctantly, you turn back to him, still seeing that annoying taunting smirk.

"Apparently not you assh-"

Your first kiss with him was shared in an alleyway with blue, pink, and purple neon lights illuminating you two. Although you gave him a bit of attitude, it was nothing he couldn't handle, and most of the time you gave off such a sweet and innocent vibe. Your innocent eyes gazed into his completely trusting and unguarded which just...did something to him.

The kiss was gentle and breathtaking. When his lips met yours, the sound of laughing party-goers passing by the alley entrance and one of the neon signs flickering would stay vividly in your memories.

"Wow..." He had breathed out unknowingly. Your innocence and trust captured his heart that night. From his experience, he developed the pet name "dollface" because of your innocence.

Overhaul

He was never a sociable person so when he even remotely started feeling something for you, he hated it. 

It took him a while to warm up to the idea of being in a relationship, but once he did, he turned into the softest man ever.

Chisaki had taken you star-gazing. Same as the other villains, he had wanted to keep a low profile, for your safety and his. He had taken you to the outskirts of the city where the lights wouldn't impact your view of the stars and he had even packed a little picnic and blankets. This surprised you greatly because...a secret romantic? Chisaki?

It happened to get chilly tonight and you had only worn a t-shirt, and as cliché as it was, Chisaki was taking off his leather jacket for you to wear. A slight blush appeared on his face when you put his jacket on, snuggling closer to him while gazing up at the stars.

He was watching you more than the sky.

"Oh look!" You pointed to the sky. "A shooting star!" You gasp as you watch it travel across the sky.

"Mhm.." Chisaki mumbled still staring at you.

Your eyes were so wide and filled with wonder he swore he saw the shooting star reflect in your eyes. "What did you wish for?" You had asked excitedly, turning to him only to see he was already staring at you intently.

He slightly blushed again because he got caught. If you ever dared to bring it up, he would deny it and say it was dark and that you're an idiot while blushing AGAIN and turning away "So?" You had asked again, deciding to not call him out on how cute he was being.

"What?" He asked still staring at you but now on your lips.

"I said what did you wi-" You were cut off by a pair of lips against your own. Giving in to the kiss, you leaned into him. It was soft and gentle like Chiskai was scared to do any more than that.

Unbeknownst to both of you, another shooting star flew by.

[sukustar]

Earth, swallow me and spit me out in the arms of this man

[i-need-chisaki-redemption-arc]

because i need to be reminded everyday 😭

[gojos-fr-bae]

Silence

Pairing: Chisaki x reader

Warnings: Angst to fluff, lots of swearing, Chisaki being a bully

It was 11 pm and Kai still hadn't come to bed, which confused you. He had this habit of getting lost in his work, and while it helped him work efficiently, it made him overwork himself a lot. In fact, before you, he would be stuck in his office for days, engrossed in his work.

Knowing this, you decided to take matters into your own hands.

"Kai!" you called, knocking on his office door...no response.

The door creaks as you push the door open and you see him. Buried in piles of paperwork and looking absolutely exhausted. He was still wearing his unnecessarily huge plague mask but had taken off his green and purple jacket.

The room was dimly lit and although he looked dashingly handsome, he also looked ready to drop right then and there. You made your way slowly to his desk and stood behind him and rested your hand on his shoulder. No reaction.

"Kai, I think you should com to bed, you've been working so hard and need to rest" you whispered softly

"NO" he replied coldly, catching you off guard.

"Come on sweetheart, you need to rest, it's not healthy to stay up this long working" you moved your hand up to his soft hair, running your fingers through it slowly.

He let out a soft sigh but didn't budge.

"I'm fine y/n, just go to bed, I'll be their in a few hours" he said, voice growing colder.

"No Kai, I'm not leaving unless you come with me"

" Y/n, I'm doing something important so just leave"

"Can't it wait till tomorrow?"

"If it could wait till tomorrow then would I be doing it right now? Gosh just use your common sense"

"Hey! There's no need to be rude"

"Well maybe I wouldn't have to be dude if you weren't so goddamn fucking annoying and would just let me do my work!" he stood up to look at you face to face, raging anger filling his eyes.

oh...

"Oh well I'm so sorry I actually care about your well being which you clearly don't!" you said, eyes beginning to sting.

"Fucking hell y/n, STOP BEING SO FUCKING STUPID AND GET THE HELL OUT OF MY OFFICE! I'M TRYING TO DO SOMETHING USEFUL WITH MY LIFE AND INSTEAD OF BEING SUPPORTIVE YOU START GIVING ME THIS BULLSHIT! GET OUT!!"

Well heck. He's never shouted at you or called you such awful things. Stupid? Did he really think that? Is that what he has felt about you all along. Has he always seen you as useless?

You're thoughts were suffocating you and it was all becoming too much. You covered your mouth to muffle your sobs and ran out of his office, slamming the door closed on your way out.

You could barely see ahead of yourself, tears obstructing your vision. Your lung ached from the sobs and cries you were trying (and failing) to hold in.

You rushing into you and Kai's room, closing the door and crashing onto the mattress. You stuffed a pillow onto your face and let your cries free. Your entire body shook from all the pain. And this would continue for another 30 minutes.

~

After you had calmed down, you went numb, your pain slowly turning into anger. Fine, If Chisaki wanted silence so bad, then that is exactly what he would get. With your revenge planned, you slept, prepared for war.

~

You woke up to the feeling of Chisaki's gloved hand wrapped around your waist, his body pressed against your back and his head tucked perfectly into the crook of your neck. The absence of his mask caused his breath to gently fan across your neck.

While all of this usually caused your heart to warm, but today it just annoyed you.

You slowly wiggled out of his grip and began preparing for the day. You made your way out of the closet (it's a walk in closet ofc) and stopped walking when your eyes landed on Kai. He was sitting up on the bed. He had already put on his casual mask.

He turned to look at you and his eyes creased slightly, meaning he was smiling at you.

"Morning angel" he said softly in his rough morning voice.

But you just scoffed and walked out.

Kai quirked his brow in confusion, staring at the door.

"Guess she didn't hear me" he said with a shrug, pushing himself off the bed and to his feet, making his way to the bathroom to get washed up.

~

You were in the kitchen, sitting at the counter and enjoying a plate of waffles and scrolling through your phone when Chisaki mad his way into the kitchen.

He lowered his plague mask to place a quick peck on your cheek, lifting it back up almost immediately.

"Moring" he mumbled

... no response.

This caused him to turn and face you, confusion evident on his features.

"Hellooo?"

Slience

"Angel? What's going on?

And to that all he received was a glare followed by you walking out of the room and leaving him his thoughts. His thought that began reminding him of you tow's dreadful encounter the previous day.

Kai's heart sank as he recalled your encounter. all the hateful word vomit he spewed to you yesterday, all in the name of peace.

The more he thought about it the more pain he felt. his chest constricted, his breathing speeding up. Never in his entire life had he felt like such a revolting peace of shit.

And then it hit him.

You...hate him.

I mean why wouldn't you? after all the pain he caused you you have every right to. But if you hate him, then that means... your going to leave him.

Panic encompassed his entire being as he rushed through the Hassaikai's base. He needs to find. He needs to stop you. He needs to apologise, needs to make you stay, because if you didn't he doesn't know if his heart could take it.

After wandering for a few minutes and found you in the garden, walking along the stone path as you admired the greenery.

Without and once of thought, Chisaki ran to you as fast as he could, engulfing you in his arms.

You were shocked to say the least, and were about to knock him off you before you noticed that he was shaking.

"Kai?" you whispered softly, draping your hands around his waist.

"I'm sorry" he croaked into your neck. " I'm sorry for yelling, I'm sorry for Being rude to you and for...for calling you stupid" His voice cracked. He pulled back and you saw tears balancing on his water line.

"Please don't leave me"

His words shocked you, leave him?

"Why would I do that?"

"Because i deserve it for being a worthless shitty human being who made you cry and doesn't even deserve to live" he whimpered

"Hey, don't talk like that" you said in a hushed tone, feeling the tears slowly trickle down your face

"I know that you said some pretty rude and harsh things and even if we aren't okay now, if we communicate properly we can work our way though this"

"So...you f-forgive me?"

"No, not yet, but eventually i will"

"And you're n-not... not l-leaving?"

You pulled him into a hug and whispered against his ear,'

"Never"

~

A/N: Heyy~~~ Tis me🤭

© gojos-fr-bae

[spookikookiboo]

Tiny Forever

Sako likes tiny things…

~Spooki🖤

[snekusneku]

kittens

[grenzlinie17]

『 親父 に 謝りたい 』 

 "I want to apologize to him"

。 。 。

[blurbios]

Burdensome [Overhaul x Reader]

cw: self-doubt, loneliness, cursing, food mention

other: gn! reader, angst(?), dialogue heavy so you’ll have to scroll a bit (sorry)

wc: 3.1k

synopsis: you were growing tired of feeling so far away from your boyfriend who was just down the hallway.

The music from your headphones stopped abruptly, causing you to whip out your phone from your pocket, only to be greeted by the no battery sign flashing on your screen. You let out an annoyed sigh and turned around to make your way to your room to charge it. You thought it had to be late or at least getting late because your phone had been fully charged when you started pacing around the compound. You tried to peek into the office as you passed by, but there were two low ranking members of the coveted Shie Hassaikai stationed outside who obstructed your view. “The boss is working.” One dismissed you, his voice gruff. 

“Isn’t it past your bedtime anyways?” The two snickered as you stomped past. You contemplated telling them off and whether or not you should tell Kai when you see him next, but you decided against both. You knew he had a lot on his plate and you didn’t want to add to it, more so than you felt you already did. The winding halls were quiet, your steps echoed as you neared your room. You couldn’t remember the last time you did anything with your boyfriend and you felt terrible. That alone caused a pit to form in your stomach. You plugged in your phone and plopped onto your desk chair, shaking your mouse to wake your desktop. 3:42am was displayed on the corner of the screen, it really was late and Kai was still working. You tried to find something to watch to keep you awake until he inevitably came to join you, but nothing interested you. You thought about playing a game, but as soon as you booted one up you no longer wanted to play. 

You grabbed your phone and drafted out a text, “hey are you going to be done soon? it’s pretty late and i didn’t see you once today. i miss you, you know.” You furiously backspaced the message, like you always did, because you didn’t want to bother him. You slammed your phone down out of frustration and breathed in deeply to prevent any crying. It had been months since you moved in and you could count on your fingers how many times you’ve actually done anything with Kai outside of the four walls of your shared bedroom, if you could even consider it shared at this point. He was always busy and you understood that, but if he was so goddamn busy all the time why did you have to be so bored out of your mind all the time? You knew you could go out if you really wanted to, but you’d have to tell him first and he’d assign someone to keep you safe if he himself couldn’t. You knew it bothered him when you went out anyways, so you only went out when he’s the one who proposes it. But it wasn’t fair, you only moved in because he was incessant about it, saying how he wanted you close, practically begging. Sometimes when he was laying next to you it felt like he was miles away. You wanted to scream, the tears you tried to shrug off began to form in your eyes. You wanted to be able to help him, he told you in the past that you just being there helps him, but you knew it was bullshit. You placed your head in your hands and let it all out as your mind raced. He wasn’t a bad boyfriend, he did care about you, but he had a goal he was set on before he met you. He did come to bed every night, or at least to your knowledge, he came to bed every night. Most times he just slipped in without waking you and slipped out in the same manner. He had only woken you up a few times and he apologized profusely in those instances. Your eyes started to sting and you could feel the tears drying on your cheeks. You mustered up all your energy to stand up and shuffle over to the en suite bathroom to wash your face. 

The cold water was refreshing, but it made you jump a little. You brought both hands to your face and dragged your fingers from the inner corners to the outer corners of your eyes, out to your temples, and down your jaw. You stared at your reflection, you looked drained and you were, rightfully so. You crossed the threshold of your room and scanned the room, looking for something to keep you occupied. Your eyes landed on an old notebook you brought from home, you took it over to the desk and scrounged around for a pen. You figured if you couldn’t say all the things you thought to him, the least you could do was write it to get it out of your brain. Much like your failed text messages, you only wrote a few lines before scribbling them out and ripping out the page, just to crumple it. On your fifth attempt, you actually managed to write the whole thing out. The second you wrote your name at the bottom of the page, you slammed your notebook shut. Again, you checked the time, 4:57am. The sun was going to rise soon, if Kai hadn’t returned by now, he wouldn't. Part of you wanted to bring him a blanket in his office, but the other part of you was far too tired and didn’t feel like trekking back just to be greeted by those two idiots at his door. You tossed and turned for a long while before falling asleep. You woke up to a knock at the door, you sat up groggily to check if Kai was next to you, He wasn’t, causing your heart to sink a bit.

“Y/N?” The familiar voice belonged to Kurono. “You didn’t come for breakfast before, so I figured I’d bring you lunch.” He opened the door slowly, to make sure he didn’t startle you.

“What time is it? You scratched your head.

“Almost 2.” He extended the plate of food to you.

“Where’s Kai? Thanks by the way!” You smiled as you grabbed the plate from him.

“He has a meeting with some on the rise villain soon, so he’s preparing his general spiel, you know how he is.” Of course he was working, you nodded as you rose to walk and set the plate on the desk, pushing things aside to make room..

“Did you see him this morning?” You wanted to stop prodding, but the words left your mouth before you could think.

“Yes. Why is something wrong?” 

“Forget I asked. Thanks again for the food.”

“Ah okay, and please refrain from walking around today. We don’t know this guy well and Kai wouldn’t want anything to happen to you.” He walked out the door, making sure to shut it behind him. This whole thing was starting to get to you, so much so that your food tasted bland. Even though it was your favorite dish, something felt off. You thought about blowing up his phone again, but apparently it’s an important meeting and you wouldn’t want to ruin it, whatever it was. Confined to your room for the day, you just put on some dumb sitcom and laid in bed scrolling through your phone. You even scrolled through old chat logs between you and Kai, it reminded you how sweet this all felt. A familiar warmth grew in your chest, as you reminisced. You thought moving in would guarantee that you would wake up next to him every morning and that the two of you would tell each other everything, how naive of you. When you started dating the head of a yazuka organization, you didn’t expect much out of it, but you expected something. Hours passed as you wallowed in your room, until you heard a knock at the door again. “Dinner is served!” Kurono said way too cheerily as he walked in.

“Thanks.” You didn’t have the energy to match his demeanor. 

“Sorry about you being cooped up in here today, I’m sure he’ll make it up to you.” He picked up your plate from lunch and swapped it with the dinner plate. You felt sick and much to his concern, you looked it too. “Are you feeling okay?” 

Of course you weren’t, “Yeah, just a bit annoyed.” A bit. The whole situation was laughable, he couldn’t walk down the halls himself to check in on you, or share a meal. Instead he sends his lackey to feign interest in how you felt. 

“Well if there’s anything I can do, just let me know.”

“You can leave.” You knew you shouldn’t take this out on him of all people, but you couldn’t keep the mask on anymore. Without another word, he up and left, leaving you alone once again. You just sat in bed, spacing out, not focussing on anything in particular. The show you had on had stopped playing, who knows how long ago,so the room was quiet. Sitting in bed became laying in bed and at some point you fell asleep, but that was short lived. Kai actually showed up, he was careful to not wake you, trying his best to be light on his feet. He looked over at your sleeping figure and smiled to himself, then gave the room a once over and noticed your dinner untouched. He shook his head, picked up the plate and brought it out of the room, when he came back in he saw that you were sitting upright.

“Kai! You’re back.” You exclaimed, half awake. You quite couldn’t tell if it was a dream or not, so you reached your arms out towards him. 

“Listen, I’m sorry for waking you and about today. I know being in here alone all day wasn’t the best, but I had to make sure you would be safe.” You felt the bed dip down a bit as he sat beside you, holding your hands in his.

“Did you send Hari to check on me?”

“Yes. Why?” He tilted his head slightly, raising a brow.

You couldn’t stifle your laugh, “Are you serious?”

There was visible confusion on his face, “Are you suggesting that I shouldn’t have?”

“I’m suggesting that maybe you should have.” Your voice broke when you placed emphasis on ‘you’, causing you to look away from him. He was at a loss for words, you’d never talked to him like that before. You pressed your lips tightly together and shook your head slightly in disbelief when you saw him stop himself from speaking. “What am I to you, Kai?”

“What?” 

“Just answer the question.” All the frustration you had felt was pouring out of you, making your words sting. 

“Everything.” He locked eyes with you, but you turned away. 

“You’re a terrible liar. We both know that isn’t true. If you’re saying it because it’s what you think I want to hear then it makes this even worse. Please, just tell me the truth.” 

“Y/N, please. I’m too tired to argue.” He leaned his back against the headboard. 

“I’m not trying to argue, I’m just trying to talk to my boyfriend.”

“We can talk tomorrow.” He said as he ran a hand through his hair. 

“Oh, can we now? You sure you’re not gonna be busy again?” You could feel the anger building inside of you. He could feel that the energy in the room switched.. 

“I—“

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” You cut him off and made your way to the door. 

He mimicked your actions, “Where are you going?”

“For a walk, you know since I didn’t get to leave this fucking room today.”

“I’m coming with you.”

“No, you’re not because you’re too tired, remember?”

“But—“

“I won’t be long.” You exited the room, chest heavy, legs moving as if you had weights tied to your ankles. You walked to the end of the hall and back, counting your breaths to calm yourself and to prevent spiraling further. You stood a couple of feet before the doorway for a while, contemplating just walking out completely. You let out a deep sigh and stepped up to the doorway. The scene in front of you made you feel as though a ton of bricks had just been dropped on you. There he was standing over your desk, notebook in hand, a small tremor visible in his hands. “What are you–Kai, I, I’m sorry.” He looked so hurt, something you’ve never seen. He looked up at you and tried to collect his thoughts, but as his eyes met yours all he could see was the words he had just read. 

Kai,

I don’t know how to say any of this or if I’ll ever even get the chance to say all this. I love you, I do, but it feels like our relationship is just an afterthought or rather I’m an afterthought. I understand that you’re busy with work, that’s why I’ve held on to this as long as I did. It’s also why I try to avoid bothering you. You have so much on your shoulders, I don’t want to be burdensome, but maybe having me move in was a bad idea. We rarely get to see one another and most of the time we spend together is sleeping. I want to be a good partner, I want to make you happy, but it’s hard to do when I’m too worried to even send you a text. I worry about you, you work way too much, and I worry that one day it’ll become so important that you forget about me entirely. These days it feels like you’re some kind of urban legend and everyone I run into around the compound has a story about seeing you, yet I always miss out on the sighting. I don’t expect you to drop everything for me, I don’t want you too, I know how important your work is to you and how important to everyone it will be if it all goes right, but I expect something. I’m not asking for a mile here Kai, just a goddamn inch. God forbid I want to spend time with you or go out in town like a normal person without having to jump through hoops to get permission. You say it’s to keep me safe, so you can have me close, but it hurts. I’m sorry.

-y/n

He returned the book to its former position and sat gently on the edge of the bed, eyes focused on the floor. The room was filled with a sad silence, until he finally broke it. “Is that really how you feel?” He bit the inside of his lip, so he wouldn’t cry in front of you. 

“It probably came off too harsh, I–” You felt so guilty for upsetting him. 

“Do I really make you feel like this?” He had a pained expression on his face, brows furrowed slightly. 

“Yeah, maybe, sometimes, I don’t know.” You rubbed the back of your neck, you couldn’t bring yourself to make eye contact. He looked at you and saw the tears welling in your eyes, his expression dropped even more. You tried to blink them away, but your eyes began to overflow and you couldn’t stop it. “I’m sorry.” You repeated over and over, each time more and more defeated. You couldn’t stand anymore, your chest hurt too much. You dropped yourself on the bed next to him. 

“I’m sorry.” He brought your head to his shoulder as an attempt to soothe you. The contact with him made it feel real, he was there next to you, trying to make you feel better. You’ve missed his touch so much that it took everything in you not to fold instantly. 

“It’s fine, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have written that.” You said between shaky breaths. 

“You don’t deserve this. I’ll be better, y/n.” He placed his arm around your shoulders and began to trace patterns on your arm. 

“So will I.” You sniffled, dragging your nose across the back in your hand. 

“Huh? You have nothing to apologize for and nothing to be better at, you have done nothing wrong.” He placed emphasis on those last words, saying them slowly, making sure you heard them clearly. He got up to retrieve the tissue box from the nightstand. He handed you a tissue and used another to wipe your tears from your face, flashing you an apologetic smile. 

“Thank you.” You blew your nose and tossed it in the bin. 

“You know you can talk to me right?” He tilted your chin up so your eyes would meet his. His gaze was warm, no trace of annoyance on his face, just concern and genuine care. 

“But you’re always doing something, I don’t want—” 

“You could never be a burden to me. Knowing that you’re here puts me at ease, knowing that I can see you whenever I want warms my heart.” He held one of your hands in between both of his.  

“Yeah, but I want to be able to see you whenever I want. It’s a two-way street, Kai. It isn’t fair that it’s always on your terms, and only on your terms.” You placed your free hand on top of his. 

“I never thought of it like that, I didn’t realize my rules were such a hindrance.” He gave your hand a gentle squeeze before continuing, “I’m sorry, my dear, for these things I've made you feel, for the lack of time I've spent with you, all of it. I shouldn't have let someone so precious to me slip through the cracks. I’m going to be better, starting right now. Whatever you want to do tomorrow, we’ll do it.”

“Really?” You smiled for the first time in days. “Really, but you need to promise me something first.”

“What is it?”

“Promise me that you won’t stop yourself from reaching out to me anymore.”

“But what if you're busy?”

“I’ll let you know when it’s an important client, besides that you can come in whenever you want.”

“Then I promise.” You threw your arms around him and he returned your embrace, holding you tighter than he ever had before. 

“Good.” 

“But you’re gonna get sick of me quick.” You said as you nuzzled your face into the crook of his neck. 

“You’re the one person I could never get sick of.” His words were sincere, he kept one hand on your back and brought the other up to cradle your head. 

“Promise?” 

“I promise.”

a/n: this started out more lighthearted in my head, but as i wrote i got super emo, so i’m sorry y’all. also, fun fact! i got back into mha because i watched the overhaul arc and was suddenly down bad

[oukamochadesigns]

I'm excited to show off more zine art~!! I have 3 to show ya'll but I'm gonna post one at a time. My mini poster made for

@bnhadecadence They have left over sales now so grab what you can before it's all gone~! https://bnhadecadence.bigcartel.com

[abodeofhunter]

"There's no more patience left. No revenge, no, it's justice."

[chaosinhood]

Happy Birthday 🥳🎉

[sukustar]

Me lately: