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#choi yeonjun angst
gardnhee · 30 days
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can we start over? - c.yj
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✸ tw/content. intentional lowercase, cussing, angst(very little), fluff, use of baby (only like once or twice.), reader is slightly antisocial in the beginning, not really proofread
✸ exbsf!yj x afab!reader
✸ note. yj drabble cs i love him an unhealthy amount
✸ song rec. start over - jacquees
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you stood in a corner like the awkward person that you are. away from all the chatter, laughter, yelling, and horny crowd. this is how you liked it, you indulged in your solitude.
the unbearably loud music rang in your ears, the fact that you were standing just a couple feet from the speakers didn’t help either.
you decided to drown the ringing by taking a sip of your cup, inhaling a sharp breath as the liquid cascaded down your throat.
“…who hired this dj? music’s unbearable…” you murmured as you frowned at the dj who stood a couple steps from you.
it was fairly boring for a while, the music slowly started to feel faint as the stuffy atmosphere began to push its way into your already tight space. you slightly squeeze the plastic cup in your hand, pressing your back against the wall.
you felt trapped.
deciding you’ve had enough of this, you walk away from the corner. as if you were popping a bubble; like a puppy opening its eyes for the first time, but instead of meeting with a fascinating world, you’re met with drunk shit heads who can’t dance, let alone walk in a straight line.
“where is she…” you huffed, looking for the coworker who invited you to this party, if you can even call it that. it’s more depressing than a fucking funeral.
pushing through everyone was a literal pain in the ass, the environment reeked of alcohol, and the air was incredibly thick. you were starting to regret even accepting the goddamn invitation.
go they said, it’ll be fun they said, “fun my ass.” you utter a small ‘tsk’ as a man twice your size bumps into you, not even having the common courtesy to apologize. god, this is horrible.
you somehow ended up in the kitchen. sighing in frustration, you rest yourself against the counter.
“i’m going to fucking kill-“ you started, but were rudely interrupted when someone walked into the kitchen.
your eyes slightly widened as you acknowledge the person. your ex best friend. fun.
he was whistling along to the horrendous noise these people call music, happiness basically oozing from his pores.
he turned his head to you, looking at you from head to toe in shock, shock which soon subsided and was replaced with an expression you can’t quite describe.
“oh.. hey.” yeonjun waved, mullet drenched in sweat as some loose hairs stuck to his forehead. he breathed heavily, his once joyful demeanor now engulfed in…uncomfortableness? melancholy? nostalgia? it’s been so long that you can’t tell anymore.
he slowly made his way to the fridge, giving you an awkward smile as you bite your inner cheek and look away.
it was silent for a while, you could feel his eyes burning holes into your face.
“yn?” he quietly said, arms crossed over the open fridge door. he looked at you, waiting for a response.
in all honesty, he didn’t expect one. at least not after ghosting you completely and then coming back a couple months later like nothing happened.
he scoffed and shook his head with a sad smile, sighing in disbelief. he was disappointed in himself.
yeonjun shut the fridge door and begun to lead himself out the kitchen, “yes?” you replied with urgency, you didn’t want him to leave. not again. not after losing him for months.
he chuckled, looking back at you. “you’re…not mad at me?” he asked, feet moving in your direction. he realized you aren’t so closed off anymore, you’re more…awake, as if you’ve come to terms with the gravity of things, and for that, he’s thankful. he can make things right now.
you grew nervous, a prominent lump built up in your throat, making it difficult for you to breathe. “i wouldn’t say i am - or was - mad, i guess i..“ you stopped yourself as yeonjun stumbled, falling onto you.
you tried backing up, but couldn’t. fucking counter…you thought, swallowing slowly as the smell of alcohol invaded your nostrils.
“yeonjun? yeonjun, you’re drunk.” you tried pushing him off, but he didn’t budge. instead, he laid his head on your shoulder, “not drunk, just… tipsy.” he blabbered.
it was silent for a couple seconds until you heard him sniffle. he was crying.
“wha…” he grabbed your waist, sobbing into your shoulder. “i’m so-“ he hiccuped, followed by a groan. “i’m sorry, yn, i’m sorry!” yeonjun cried, lifting his head in an attempt to look at you. you stood there, dumbfounded. heart hammering against your chest. he’s drunk. it was evident, yet he still denied it.
he peeked at you through his wet lashes, incoherent sounds slipping past his lips as he wiped his runny nose. “and you say you’re not drunk? look at you! why are you crying?!” you raised both brows in confusion, stroking his hair softly.
you’re supposed to be cussing him out for all the hurt he’s caused you, for leaving with absolutely no explanation, yet here you are, combing your cold fingers through his sweaty strands as he bawls into your shoulder. you’ve seen him like this more often than not; always manages to surprise you, though.
“i’m not drunk…. ‘m sorry” he hesitated, wiping the wetness from his eyes with the back of his hand. as you realize how close your bodies are, you nod, circling around him.
yeonjun turned, biting his lip. he wants to say something. you know he wants to say something, but he’s holding back and it’s making you anxious and impatient.
“would you maybe…want to leave?” you blink, all previous feelings of discomfort disappearing. “what’re you planning?” you question, crossing your arms as you sternly stare at him.
“maybe grab some drinks and then go to my place?” he smiled, which quickly disappeared when you displayed a doubting look. “i mean, i just want to talk to you…without all the noise…and the multitude of people.” your heart shattered, and you were sure your eyes softened, because his did too.
“fine.” yeonjun’s ears perk up, big smile on his face. “let’s go.” you nodded, grabbing his arm before he left the kitchen.
“i’m driving.”
“but-“ his eyebrows furrowed, “no buts, deny it all you want, we’re not risking it.” he sighed, defeat poking through the pout on his lips. he lowly hummed in agreement, walking out of the kitchen with you trailing close behind.
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“home sweet home!” yeonjun exclaimed, arms flying in the air as the bag of soju dangled in his hand. “yeonjun, be quiet, it’s late.” you slowly grabbed his arm, taking the bag of soju away. “i shouldn’t have allowed you to drink on the way here.” you sighed, placing the bag on the counter and taking out the already opened box of soju.
he pouted, stumbling towards the little coffee table that sat in the middle of his living room. “bring some soju, please!” he slurred.
you grabbed the box, nestling it under your arm as you made your way towards drunk yeonjun.
you sat down, setting the box on the coffee table. “oh…i forgot to bring shot glasses.” you groaned, fixing to stand up when yeonjun stopped you.
“no, it’s okay. i’ll go get them.” he smiled, patting your hand.
“but-“
“it’s okay.” he shook his head, standing up and making his way to the kitchen.
in a matter of seconds, he was back, sitting in front of you with soju in hand, two shot glasses already set on the table.
yeonjun held the bottle from the bottom with one hand, and swirled it vigorously with the other. you watched him closely, how his hands wrapped around the bottle, you wonder how they’d feel on your face-
“yn?” you blinked, snapping back into reality. “yes? i’m sorry.” you gulped, noticing a full shot glass in front of you.
as you were about to reach for the glass, you stopped midway. sighing as you plopped your arm down on the table. yeonjun noticed this and raised a brow, “is everything…alright?” he asked, pouring soju into his glass.
“yes…and no.” you admitted, “i mean i just…i missed this, you know? spending time with you. i missed being here. i missed this apartment.” you paused, staring at yeonjun who was now looking down at his thighs.
“i missed you.” you leaned forward, arms now crossed on the table. yeonjun snapped his head up, quickly grabbing his glass and gulping the liquid down.
“ahhh…” he set the glass down, frowning as the liquid burned his throat. “i missed you too yn…” he smiled weakly, you realized he wasn’t in the right mind for all the sappy stuff right now, so you decided to change the subject.
“tell me, what have you been up to?” you smiled, grabbing your glass, tilting your head to the side as you swallow the drink.
“me? hm…not much….” yeonjun leaned forward, smile spread across his flushed cheeks.
✸ ✸ ✸
you lost track of time, it seemed. but you weren’t the only one. yeonjun, too, lost track of how many shots he took. not that it mattered, he was already drunk out of his mind to begin with. “baby…..” he slurred, reaching out to you as you gasped. baby?? are you serious??
“yeonjun what…” you decided to stop yourself, not even questioning anything that came out of his mouth.
after looking around for a minute, you groaned. there is so much to clean up.
an unfinished 20 pack of soju on the table; only 4 remaining, some snack wrappers thrown on the table, and a drunk yeonjun who can’t even utter a proper sentence.
“‘m s’sorry” he hiccuped, head lulling as he smiled like an idiot. his lips glistened under the dim light, most likely from all the constant licking and drinking he’s been doing.
“let me take you to your room so you can sleep.” he shook his head violently, backing up against the sofa behind him as you made your way to him.
“no!” he pouted, looking at you with tears brimming his eyes. “oh you’re such a child, come on let’s go!” yeonjun pushed your hand off his arm, whining.
you stopped and huffed, sitting down beside him in order to comfort him, “why are you crying?”
“i f…feel like shit” he cried, wiping his tears with the back of his hand. “why do you feel that way?” you knew this was just a drunk fit of his, but you had to at least hear him out.
“‘cuz i ruined my chance with the person i love” he sniffles, staring into your eyes with his teary ones. you blinked, wiping his tears with your thumbs. “and who may that be?” you question, stroking his shoulder in a comforting manner.
“you.” you inhale sharply, blinking in confusion. you shook your head, chuckling awkwardly, “you’re just drunk, come on.” yeonjun stopped protesting, defeated by his own tiredness.
you wrapped his arm over your shoulder, dragging him while leaning against the walls for support. “goddamnit, what have you been eating? you’re so heavy.” you strain, sighing in relief as your eyes find his bedroom door.
opening the door was one thing, laying him on the bed was another. you pant, his body weighing you down. as a result you slipped and fell.
on top of him.
jesus fuck.
you froze when he groaned. “i’m so sorry!” you scrambled to stand up, but he grabbed your arm and pulled you against him.
“sleep with me tonight, please.” yeonjun whispered, lazy smile spreading across his face. you shake your head, “yeonjun, you’re drunk. we can’t be doing this. you’re not in the right mind!” you faintly shake your head, “please?” he insisted.
you sighed, pressing your forehead against his chest. “fine. but i will be leaving first thing in the morning.” he chuckled, nodding. “if you want to get comfortable, my shirts are over there-“ he hiccuped. you nodded and patted his chest in understanding. “just sleep, okay?? i’ll be right back.” yeonjun hummed, closing his eyes.
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you wake up groggy and disoriented, staring at the window as a ray of sunshine peeked through the curtain, making you squint and smile lazily.
you rub the sleep from your eyes and stretch, “good mor-“ you stop as you notice yeonjun isn’t in bed with you anymore. you look around the room once more, no sign of him.
a pang of worry and confusion washed over you. one would think it’s stupid considering the fact that you’re in his house, yet you can’t help but be alarmed.
what if he left you again?
‘oh that’s stupid, yn. pull yourself together.’ you shake your head and scoff, but the panic settles at the pit of your stomach nonetheless.
throwing the blanket to the side, you stand, yawning as you wobble towards the door.
“yn-“ yeonjun stops, doorknob in one hand and breakfast tray in the other. he eyed you as you stood there, eyes wide in confusion.
yeonjun blinked, “good morning?…” he lets out a breathy laugh, stepping into the room and closing the door behind him with his foot. “i made you breakfast.” you felt your heart squeeze at that. he smiled, walking over to the bed and signaling you to lay down.
and you did. you laid down, placing the warm blankets back on your body and smoothing them over in order to create a flat enough surface for the breakfast tray.
“thank you so much..” you gush as yeonjun placed the tray in front of you. he sat down, crossing his legs and smiling like a total idiot.
“you’ve been nothing but smiles since you walked in the room…did something happen?” you question, making yeonjun hang his head with an even bigger smile on his face. “you look so beautiful.” he mumbled, adjusting his position on the bed.
“what?” you looked up, cheek stuffed with food. he snorted, scooting forward and leaning towards you. “i said,” he wiped your lip with his thumb, eyes traveling to yours, holding them dearly. “you look so beautiful.” he chuckled at your expression, making his heart skip a beat.
“you’re making a mess, be careful, yeah?” you grab the tray, placing it to one side as you choke on your food. yeonjun stands with you, stroking your arms with his soft hands.
“hey, you alright?” you nodded, grabbing onto his shoulder for support. “it’s just…” you stopped, swallowing the lump in your throat. “you caught me off guard, that’s all.” yeonjun’s eyes softened, “i meant it.” he caressed your face as a warm smile tugged at his lips.
“why…why are you being so nice to me?” you stepped away from his hold, sitting back down on the soft bed. he sighed and flopped down beside you, staring at the curtains that blocked the sunlight.
“because i’m in love with you.” his eyes traveled from the window to you, “i’ve been in love with you.” you waver, eyes widening in confusion. “and i don’t want to mess up again.”
“so last night-“
“i remember.” yeonjun nodded, fidgeting with his thumbs as he bit his bottom lip. “i guess i was drunk enough to let that slip but not enough to forget.” he reasoned, gazing at you briefly before staring at his feet.
“it’s okay if you don’t want anything to do with me, i mean-“ you placed a hand on his, drawing circles on it with your thumb. “yeonjun, im in love with you too.” he stopped, shifting on the bed.
“what?…”
“im in love with you too.”
he stuttered, mouth opened for a few seconds before closing it again. you saw the glint in his his eyes before being pulled into a hug.
a long, warm, cozy hug.
a hug you’ve been craving for a while.
his hug.
you broke into tears, nuzzling your face into his shoulder. “oh god, yn, i’m deeply sorry. i’ve hurt you so much.” yeonjun ran his fingers through your hair, cooing softly.
you stained his shirt, but he didn’t care,“i missed you so much, you know? we stopped talking for so long. i thought i lost you for real…” you say between sobs, lightly punching his chest.
“i forgive you, dumbass.” he stayed quiet, you’re too nice. he didn’t deserve you, he didn’t deserve your forgiveness. yet you gave it. you gave something so precious to someone who doesn’t even deserve a single look from you.
yeonjun held your face in his hands, wiping your tears with his thumbs. he smiled, “how about this, you finish breakfast and then we can go wherever you want. i’ll explain myself. i’ll explain everything.” you nod slowly, grinning.
“there’s my yn, i missed you.” he quipped, earning himself a slap to his arm. he winced, rubbing the spot.
“is this a date then?” you question, grabbing another bite of your once forgotten food.
“hmmmmmmm” yeonjun tapped his chin, laughing as you whine. “yes dummy, it is.” he flicked your forehead lightly as you giggled.
you grab his arm, “let’s get ready then.” yeonjun didn’t budge as you tried dragging him along, “but the food…” you shook your head, “it’s gone cold, plus i know you’re somewhat hung over so let me treat you to food, hm?” you tapped his hand reassuringly.
“yn-“
“i’m not taking no for an answer.” he pursed his mouth, slowly nodding in defeat.
“perfect, where do you want to go?”
“how about…”
you both disagreed the entire way to the bathroom, laughing and giggling as jokes were thrown around between sentences.
you missed this.
you missed yeonjun.
he was willing to start over, and you were willing to let it happen.
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© GARDNHEE 2024, do not copy, modify, or upload on other platforms.
💌: im sorry this is lwk ass, i hope you enjoyed regardless! please make sure to leave a like, comment, and reblog!! thank you 🫶
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channoticedmeuwu · 10 months
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23:57 HRS | p — CHOI YEONJUN × FEM!READER | g — fluff, prod!reader, vocalist!yeonjun, idol!au not intended | w — none
:: (🖇️.) !!🎧🪽 ω 🖥️❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ☆
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“let's keep the last one and try again.”
yeonjun blinked at you from behind the glass— his glasses were perched low on his nose, his hair was pulled into a half pony and his neck, adorned in a dainty chain, flexed as he swallowed, realizing that he felt awfully nervous to be criticized by you. he only nodded, a jingle from his piercings echoed, letting out a chuckle as he saw you tilting your head with a soft, encouraging smile.
cute, you thought to yourself as you pressed your legs together and rubbed your face, accidentally smearing your lipgloss a little beyond your lips. but it only made you look imperfectly prettier. that's what yeonjun thought, eyeing the way your lips looked— plush and soft n’ sparkly as you smiled at him.
“you're good, jun,” you hummed after his take, throwing him another smile as you shifted your focus from the computer onto him. you couldn't tell if it was the new ambiance lighting that was recently installed in the studio or just your imagination, but, was he blushing?
“thank you.” he muttered, running a finger over his bottom lip. reaching out towards the pencil, he began scribbling something on his lyric sheet. “can I try that again?”
“of course.”
you were refreshing, yeonjun thought to himself. the way you shot him encouraging nods and hums of approval— he felt like he was being highlighted in ways that he never thought could make him shy. and after another take, he saw you sucking in a breath, looking at him with a raised eyebrow, as if to say, ‘it's perfect.’
you could see him pressing his lips together. if he wasn't blushing before, he was definitely now.
“fuck,” you blinked with a slight chuckle. ironically, what you were about to say next was exactly what he felt like, ears growing pink as he fingered the pendant of the necklace around his neck, eyes glazing over your oddly sweet features.
“i've never heard anything that sounds like you before.”
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txt — masterlist
a/n — just finished watching skz record s-class and I'm in the mood. yeonjun manbun supremacy + I switched the formatting of my drabbles what r everyone's opinions
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yeonboy · 11 months
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𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐥 ♡ choi yeonjun // mlist.
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After facing disappointment with love for years upon years, you have chosen to replace romance with dance in your life, dedicating your entire time to this dance academy you’re employed at. It’s not that you hate men now, you just don’t expect to fall for them anymore because all they do is break your heart. And then Choi Yeonjun enters your life as a new recruit at the academy – sweet, adorable, soft spoken, kind and younger than you. He is everything you have never found attractive in a guy before. But somehow, you're helplessly spiraling for him.
❧ choi yeonjun x f. reader | 16+ | smau ♡ comedy ♡ angst ♡ strangers to friends to lovers!au ♡ dance academy!au ♡ 98-liner!reader ♡ dancer!reader ♡ dancer!yeonjun ♡ slow burn.
❧ warnings! profanity, an ABUNDANCE of suggestive jokes, mentions of people's sex lives (or lack thereof), death & murder threats as jokes, some of the characters being assholes for no reason, reader being a commitment phobe, a lot of pining, a ton of miscommunication (hehe ofc <3), misunderstandings, unnecessary heartbreaks + more will be added as the series progresses!
❧ featuring! all of txt | jimin & jungkook (bts) | sakura & kazuha (le sserafim) | yeji & ryujin (itzy) | keeho (p1harmony) | somi (soloist, ex i.o.i).
❧ playlist! trampoline - zayn & shaed ║ easy - camila cabello ║ lavender haze - taylor swift ♪
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❧ status! 23.04.23 ⇢ tba. | on-going | bi-weekly updates
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notes! heyyy, guys! yes, rya smau era 2k23 hehe! i had this idea for a very angsty fic where an older reader has feelings for a younger yeonjun but can't accept it bec he's not her "type"... but when i tried to write it, it got soooo sad and heavy soooo fast that i had to give up 😭 SO! i reckoned why not attempt to do an smau w a lighter version of this concept??? let's hope this turns out okay (:
pls be kind! the last time i wrote an smau was in 2018 so my creativity's got rust in every crevice (': but constructive criticism + suggestions are more than welcome! 🫶
❧ main masterlist | inbox ⁘
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profiles: [1] [2] [3]
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00. intro ║ 01. more nepotism hires ║ 02. grandpa and grandma ║ 03. break a leg (but not yours) [written: 1k] ║ 04. do you like flowers ║ 05. ✨aRtTtT✨ ║ 06. let the boy feel a woman's touch ║ 07. support system ║ 08. liking people we can't have ║ 09. it IS weird ║ 10. ‼ trouble ‼ ║ 11. connecting some big ass dots ║ 12. it's a work in progress ║ 13. dance crush ║ 14. enemies to lovers ║ 15. ohhh my god i'm so stupid ║ 16. at least that’s how it began ║ 17. we're no sidehoe material ❌ ║ 18. jealousy wasn't on my bingo card ║ 19. pesky little feelings ║ 20. why do i know so much ║ 21. it should've been me ║ 22. an overthinker AND a dumbass ║ 23. everything is a mess [written: 500] ║ 24. sum chamgo love dive it is [written: 1k] || 25. feels like a funeral in here ║ 26. let's all act surprised || 27. must start breathing into a bag ║ 28. IDK DUDE IM NERVOUS ║ 29. i wasn't jumping I SLIPPED ║ 30. wdym denial ║ [tba]
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taglist: @bailies-me @samisubi @forever-in-the-sky2 @captivq @jiawji @hyuneyeon @wanlore @softcabur @emohazuzworld @yjusei @marifujioka @taekwondoes @suzirumas @ohmahgods @ye0nvibezzn @mrsyawnzzn @rionah
let me know if you'd like to be added!
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© yeonboy 2023 // do not steal, copy or repost. respect your local content creators, kaythanks.
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yeonyeonyeonjun · 6 months
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Serendipity
pairing: choi yeonjun x fem!reader
word count: 505
synopsis: You were stood up by your date, when a mysterious man came to take his place.
warning: bickering, and I think that is all? let me know if I have missed something :)
a/n: I'm back? kinda. just wanted to try getting back to writing, but let's see how this goes. this is kinda a series? or just a collection of written works until I get bored? pls don't expect frequent updates, I swear I'm bad at all of this 😭 anyway, I hope you guys like this :)) pls feel free to give feedback <3
master list for this series
~~~
At this point, you wondered why you had decided to show up in the first place. You should have dumped him the last time he said he would change. But now here you were, munching on some bread, annoyed and potentially planning his murder. As you munched, you sadly, very SADLY made eye contact with the old couple sitting diagonally to you. They shot you a sad look as you smiled back awkwardly.
As your gaze made its way around the room, you realized, everyone was taking sneaky glances at you. You were so going to murder him. Just as you were about to give up and head home, someone sat across from you, sighing loudly.
“So sorry babe, the traffic was preposterous.” The mystery man said.
“Preposterous? You literally called traffic that?” You replied, not surprised by the choice of words.
“Hey, I’m trying to help you here, and you’re insulting me?!” The man continues.
“Um, well thank you-”
“Yeonjun.” He smiles.
“Yeonjun.” You smiled back.
“So, before this gets awkward and we just start to gawk at each other, why don’t you tell me something about this idiot being who stood you up?” He continues.
“Well, his name is Leo. He was supposed to show up about, let's say an hour ago?” You draw.
“Be honest, how long have you been waiting?”
“An hour and a half?”
“Are you serious?”
“Yeah.” You sigh.
“I’m surprised you haven’t thrown your glass of water at me.”
“I know, I should cause a scene. But that old couple sitting diagonally to us have been giving me pitied looks, and they’re looking at us now. So I’m kind of afraid that they might just get a heart attack if I do something this bold.” This makes the boy laugh.
Your eyes widen at the sound. You have encountered your fair share of attractive men, but this man, is something different. Even his laugh is something different. Maybe. Just maybe you are onto something with this date.
“Why did you decide to help me?” You ask, making Yeonjun tilt his head at you in response.
“What do you mean? I saw a pretty girl waiting for some douche and thought why not take a chance and treat you the way you should be treated? Nicely.” He asked.
“Sounds a little cocky to me.” You challenge.
“Agreed. Let’s just get to know each other as friends first. I am sure you will fall for my charms soon enough.” He smirks and shoots you a wink.
“Are you guys ready to order?” The waitress asks, and finally, you get to have food.
The entire night went by with you and Yeonjun conversing over something or the other. By the end, you were a little sad to be saying goodbye.
"Before you leave, I just want to say thank you. For everything." You say with a smile.
"I only accept thank yous in exchange for phone numbers." He says with a smile.
"Well, here you go then." You say, smiling back.
___
Part one done?
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sungbeam · 2 years
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AHH REQUESTS OPEN?? omgomg OK could you perhaps write an angsty yeonjun friends to lovers drabble with a happy ending <//3 like reader and jun are best friends but one night they kiss and either reader or yeonjun completely freaks out over it and starts avoiding the other until they realize they’re in love w the other and need each other SORRY IM SUCH A SUCKER FOR THE ANGSTY FRIENDS TO LOVERS TROPE😩😩😩 anyways if you decide to write this, please don’t rush yourself and take all the time you need duckie!!! have a good day 🤍🤍
𝗶𝘁 𝗸𝗶𝗹𝗹𝘀 𝗺𝗲
choi yeonjun x gn!reader
2.5k words (sorry I KNOW i said 2k max but how can i not y'all), angst, fluff in the beginning if u squint, bffs2l, kithing, idk why but they cry at the end, barely proofread
a/n: nana !! thank u so much for ur request, my luv ^_^ i loved writing it sm i'm so honored to write u an angsty yeonjun fic <3 took much inspo from the vibes of "it kills me" by dxmentia and keshi so yeah (_ _;)
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"Ow."
Choi Yeonjun clicked his tongue, his lips pursing into a cooing pout. "Sorry, honey."
You suppressed your wince and prayed to god he couldn't see your pink-dusted cheeks. Or at least, maybe he would think it was from all the pain coming from your recently pierced ears. No matter how gentle Yeonjun was (and trust that he was incredibly gentle with you), the rubbing alcohol would simply never cease to bring you great pain as it rid your piercings of bacteria and infection. "It's okay. Not your fault. It just kinda hurt."
"You're doing really well," he murmured under his breath. He was so close to you that you could feel his body heat, but he had claimed he had to be so close because the bathroom light was so dim and because he didn't want to miss any blood. Then came his constant praises as he helped you through the process, "It looks good so far, Yn-ie."
You sighed in relief as he stepped away and tossed the soiled cotton swab into the trash. "Does it?" You peered into the mirror and took a peek at your reddened earlobes, studded in sterling silver earrings. 
Yeonjun appeared beside you again and nodded his head. He had even swapped his main earrings to match your studs. Your best friend currently boasted a whopping five piercings, and he'd even thought of an eyebrow piercing at one point. But, as you stared at his pretty, sculpted face, you realized how much you appreciated his decision to only get an eyebrow slit. 
Only. Tch. As if it was something small. It amazed you how attractive such a little thing could be on a person, but you also couldn't help but admit that everything about your best friend was attractive. Even in the dim, cruddy light of his bathroom, he somehow glowed like a sculpture under display lights. 
Yeonjun caught your eyes in the mirror—smiled. His eyes crinkled at the corners, and he leaned against the wall next to the door. You wished he hadn't folded his arms across his chest, because now, all you saw were his arms. And his chest. And his smile. And his— "You should get an upper cartilage piercing on your left side," he suggested mindlessly, eyes intent on your face. "Like mine."
You leaned your hip against the bathroom counter. "Okay, slow down, mister. Let's make sure these ones are successful first." You gestured to the studs in your earlobes now. 
He pushed off the wall and stepped into your space, teeth capturing his bottom lip. "It'll be fine," he said with a roll of his eyes. He raised his hand and gently brushed a strand of hair from your eyes. He was so close again. 
"Didn't your second ones almost get infected, like, four times?"
He deadpanned, and you giggled, head tilting back slightly. 
Oh, if only you'd seen the stars in his eyes whenever he watched you laugh. It made his heart palpitate whenever he made you happy. (He just wished he could make you even happier.)
Yeonjun snapped out from his daze, clearing his throat. It was wrong to have feelings for you like he did, wasn't it? But what about all of your lingering stares? Did they mean anything like his did? "Laugh all you want, but they're still here, aren't they?"
You sobered into a wide grin. "Okay, okay. Whatever." You placed your palms on his chest and gave him a light push out of the bathroom door. "Now, out! I gotta do my things."
Yeonjun's bottom lip jutted out. "Aww, why can't I just do my night things while you do your night things?"
"Because you always insist on brushing each other's teeth?"
"It's not that weird."
You rolled your eyes. "Yes, yes it is that weird, Jun." 
You stepped out of the bathroom for a moment, intent on going to grab something from your overnight bag. What you hadn't anticipated was the slight lift in the carpeting; you swore it hadn't been there before. Your foot hooked onto the crevice and your eyes widened as you were sent flying. 
Yeonjun's instincts caught you, and your body hit his with an "oomf" falling from his lips. The both of you landed in a heap on the floor, but he had broken your fall, your body parallel over him. Your noses brushed, your hair fell over his forehead. 
His eyelashes fluttered and he licked his lips with his eyes darting between your eyes and your mouth. "Yn…" he murmured, and you felt the delicate, but hesitant touch of his hand smoothing the hair on the back of your head. 
He coaxed you down to him, his head lifting slightly to meet your lips. 
You wondered if the heartbeat pulsing like a bass drum was yours or his or both of yours—your chests were pressed together like glue, sandwiched together and clinging to dear life. Yeonjun's head hit the carpet, and his fingers threaded in your hair, a small content hum spilling into your mouth. 
That woke you up. 
You rocketed off of him, quite literally scrambled away. 
He seemed to realize the same thing when you noticed how wide his eyes had gotten. Yeonjun sat against his bed, his gaze settled on you as he waited with bated breath for your next move. 
"I'm sorry," you choked out and fumbled to your feet. In a daze, you hurriedly grabbed your overnight bag from the foot of his bed. 
"Yn—wait, Yn!" Yeonjun could only sit there and reach for you helplessly as you swept yourself out of his room, out of his apartment, as if you hadn't even been there in the first place. 
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The kiss had been a mistake, you'd told your roommate Yeji. 
She had scoffed, and pressed, "You love him, Yn. That's what this is, isn't it?" But she'd drawn up a bath and put on a movie for you to make you feel better anyway.
You could hear the exasperation in her voice, but you didn't need her to tell you that to know. Harboring feelings like this for Yeonjun was always difficult when you spent so much time in his presence, hearing about his day, feeling his affectionate gestures, dealing with your heart skipping every time he did something as small as open the door for you. No, you definitely did not need Yeji to tell you that you were in love with him.
There was this certain uneasiness about you the next few days. The hair on the back of your neck was constantly standing up; you always felt colder, emptier, even with the fan off and sunlight streaming through the windows. There was something so miserable about having no notifications from your best friend, especially since a part of you hoped that you had dreamt the kiss and that it truly had been all your imagination. 
But reality slammed back into you on Saturday morning. 
Early Saturday morning grocery shopping had always been something that you and Yeonjun did together, but as you stood in the self check-out lane, mindlessly scanning your items and placing them in the bagging area, you tried imagining doing this all over again next week—alone. 
The lane next to you opened up, and you had the sudden urge to look up. 
Yours and Yeonjun's eyes met at once, a clashing of waves against a cliff face, the memory of that night resurfacing and lingering. He was swaddled in a hoodie with his dark hair hanging in his eyes, and you wondered if he'd lost sleep over that night like you had. Or maybe you were being dramatic, but you feared what came next. 
"Hey," he said first, then abruptly cleared his throat. 
You set a head of lettuce onto the scanner to be weighed. "Hi." 
You went quiet when, after you'd moved the lettuce, Yeonjun stepped over and lifted the large carton of mangoes from the counter for you so you could scan it. He set the mangoes down in your shopping cart, and you continued on like clockwork. You hadn't asked, and you never needed to ask with him, and thus, you were left at a crossroads now. (How did one ask their best friend if they loved them back in a way that best friends shouldn't?)
Yeonjun went back to his own station and started checking out his selected items, while you pulled your wallet out to pay for yours. 
"Thank you for the help," you murmured beneath the sound of the chirping register.
He bobbed his head, swallowed. "No problem." 
And then you were ready to leave—your items were bagged up and loaded into the cart, you'd grabbed your receipt from the printer—but you lingered still. Because he wasn't done yet. 
You bit your lip and drummed your fingers along the handle of your cart. Yeji's voice urging you to just tell him echoed in your mind, over and over again. When you opened your mouth to say something, he beat you to it. 
"Your, uhm, piercing might be infected."
You blinked, then turned to him. Out of all the things he could've said… maybe you were hopeless. "Is it?" You twisted the urge to reach up and touch your piercings, and though you'd tried to clean them out these past few days like he showed you, perhaps you had missed a few spots. 
Yeonjun hoisted the bags from his counter and walked out with you toward the exit. "It's a little red. I—" he stopped himself, hesitated. "Did you want to come over tonight?"
"Jun…"
He stopped to face you, and there in his expression, you saw the lines of desperation. This wasn't about the piercing or the infection. "I just wanna make sure you're okay." 
And dear god, if you didn't want to make sure he was, too. 
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It was just a kiss, right? 
You had been weighing the pros and cons of—well, whatever was going to happen next. It was less of pros and cons, and more of convincing yourself that you hadn't just ruined one of the relationships you cherished most in your life. Because when you realized that you full-blown, head-over-heels, oh-good-lord loved Choi Yeonjun… man, did the world cave in. 
You inhaled deeply before slotting your copy of his apartment key into the lock and letting yourself in. The smell of spices and the crackling sound of sizzles erupted into your senses as you closed the door behind you. Just to your left, Yeonjun stood at the stove with his back to you, laboring over a pan of what you could guess was fried rice. He knocked the plastic spatula along the rim of the pan and set it down on the counter. 
"Hey," he said over his shoulder while he shut off the hood range's fan. "Thanks for coming."
You nodded and fiddled with the hem of your shirt. "Thanks for having me." You didn't know what to do, where to sit, how to exist in this space for some reason. 
Yeonjun walked toward you and rested his hand between your shoulder blades. "Let's take a look at your ears, hm?"
Of course, you wanted to say. Of course he would worry about you first. 
The bathroom light was dim as it flickered on. The bottle of isopropyl had been sitting untouched in the corner of the medicine cabinet, and Yeonjun pulled it out and dipped the tip of a cotton swab into the clear liquid. His touch was gentle as the alcohol bit its way into the earring hole, cleaning out any of the build up that might have accumulated there. 
You stared at the counter, your neck and head tilted to give him easy access so that he could see in the dim lighting. You wondered if the reason why he hovered a little farther away this time was because he didn't want to make you uncomfortable. 
When he had finished cleaning up your piercings and confirmed that it wasn't infected just yet, you found yourself sitting across from him at his small table in the kitchen. Yeonjun set a bowl of fried rice in front of you, and you murmured out a small thank you. The steam rose to meet your face and you realized that the smell of the food he always made you had your body relaxing. Home-cooked meals were things that either you, Yeonjun, or the both of you made for each other—and with that in mind, you wondered once more, how could you think about a world without him around?
He settled in his seat, posture slumped, as he watched you take a bite. Then he picked up his spoon and picked at his own bowl. "Yn… are we cool?
Your spoon slowed on its way back into the bowl. When you looked at him, you found that he was waiting for your answer with a nervous sheen in his eyes. You set your spoon down to play with a stray thread on your jacket sleeve. "I think so."
"You think so," he echoed, but it sounded empty, as if he was uncertain if he heard you correctly. He scratched the side of his face, his jaw clenched in thought. "The—the kiss, Yn."
You inwardly winced. "Yeah."
He was fumbling for words. "I—I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable or step over boundaries, and I… I totally get it if you hate me for it. I just thought that was…" His voice died, lost its confidence, as he met your gaze again. He whispered, "I just thought you liked me, too."
Oh, dear Lord. Did he just say too? Your head was spinning at how your heart thundered in your ribcage. "Jun, I don't just like you," you stammered. "I literally—I'm in love with you. And I could never hate you."
"But Yn, you just left—"
"I know," you cut in and your hands flew to your hair. "I'm sorry, Jun. I'm so sorry. I was just… I was just scared of what that might have meant, and I didn't wanna lose you." You heard your voice break at the lattermost words, and your vision was beginning to blur. 
Yeonjun's chair rattled against the floor as he clambered out of his seat, then rounded the table to get to you. He was shaking his head, hands grabbing your face in his warm palms, begging you to look at him. His eyes were lined in gold from the warm light of the kitchen reflecting off the tears pooling. 
"Oh, sweetheart," he rasped, kneeling before you. Both yours and his hands shook in the other's hold, lips quivering. "Christ, I thought I lost you, Yn."
You shook your head back and forth. "I love you," you repeated. "I dunno what I'd do without you."
His mouth pulled into a smile as he laughed through the tears now streaming down the slopes of his cheekbones. "Glad we're on the same page now."
He rose up a little to pull an extra chair closer to sit next to you. "I love you too, Yn," he promised, leaning toward you and ghosting his lips over yours. "I love you so much."
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a/n: yeah,, , so that happened kdnfjd tbh i can't even tell if that was sad or not i can't even tell my own angst writing anymore T_T
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permanent taglist: @tayunji @im-a-big-mess @honeyhuii @y3jiishot @crazywittysassy @seomisaho @stopeatread @enhacolor @yedammi @rnjfy @jaehunnyy @justanotherkpopstanlol @w3bqrl @super-btstrash-posts @hibernatinghamster @otchae @bigballsz @shakalakaboomboo @ashxxkook @kpop718
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beom1e · 1 year
Text
twenty four
everything about yeonjun was infuriating to you. the way he assumed he had the right to toss other women aside simply because he was arranged to marry you, the way he didn’t care for the kingdom he was going to one day rule, and most importantly, the way he didn’t love you the way that you loved him.
pairing choi yeonjun x fem! reader
genre drama, angst, fluff, enemies to lovers, royal au, prince! yeonjun, princess! reader, set in the past (unspecified)
warnings misuse of alcohol, mature discussions, minor injuries, minor violence, a horse dies, large amounts of blood, weapons (daggers and arrows), cursing, slight misogyny, gets a bit heated but not too far, mentions of death
masterlist | next
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it was funny how alcohol could change so much. everybody shows their true colours, even if they don’t want to. people cheat, love is drunkenly expressed, confidence is boosted, awful confessions are spilled, mistakes are made. you had once vowed to never let your true colours show, no matter what. it would be more harm done than good. nevertheless, you couldn’t resist an invitation to drink.
just you and the other girls in flowing nightgowns, laughter filling the room. you would sing and dance and knock empty bottles to ground as you clumsily navigated your bedroom on a loop. gossip and the never-ending ‘who is doing who’ updates would be exchanged, your favourite aspect of the night. and much like your present, all of this would be a result of a mandatory ball or dining experience. the need to free yourselves from those obligations always ended in drinking until you passed out, and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
the forced smile on your lips faltered for a moment as the boy standing before you looked you up and down. if it weren’t for the required formalities, you would have taken your hand out of his own and used it to shove him far away from yourself. as a princess, though, that was merely a fantasy. you could only dream of breaking character in a room full of watchful eyes.
your father was the king, or at least one of them. the land was split into two separate kingdoms thousands of years ago, as the two families totally despised each other. in a sense, you were the juliet of the story. your mother was forever searching for peace, and convinced your father to make a deal with the rival kingdom. that deal involved you and the other family’s son, choi yeonjun. you were to be married, and the two kingdom’s would be united into one. everybody was sick of war, and you were roped into their need for peace before you had even been born. now you were the queen-to-be, and had a reputation to uphold as their peace-loving princess.
you actually hated peace. you loved bad habits, both alcohol and boys. being queen was something you dreaded, and mostly because it meant being married off to a man who couldn’t care less about you if he tried.
yeonjun was quite like you. he loved socialising in rebellious ways, although he always got away with it. to the adults, he was a prince hard at work in preparation for his throne. to your generation, he was the biggest heartbreaker of both kingdoms combined. it didn’t taint his image, in fact it only made him more desirable. a king who valued fun and freedom over ridiculous activities such as hunting and fencing, and one who everyone on the land had a chance to sleep with. watching girl after girl sob and splutter about how yeonjun broke her heart at your secret, drunken parties always gave you a sickly feeling. how could a man be so cruel? and how come you were the only woman he wasn’t interested in?
‘would you excuse us?’ yeonjun spoke. talk of the devil and he will arrive. ‘i’d like to have a word with my betrothed.’
right, this was your engagement party.
‘of course,’ the man dropped your hand, and you smiled politely before following behind yeonjun.
‘i’m not a damsel in distress,’ you reminded. ‘i don’t need you to step in every time a man so much as looks in my direction.’
‘that man was eyeing you as if you were a bag of gold,’ yeonjun stopped and turned to face you. of course, he had to do this in the middle of the ballroom. ‘he has no status, so he’s not worth tainting your image over. a queen shouldn’t be seen mingling with commoners when she’s engaged to be wed.’
‘i was making polite conversation,’ you raised your voice slightly, before catching yourself and taking a deep breath. ‘i had no intention to sleep with him. i’m not you, i don’t just take every living, breathing thing home with me.’
‘i’m friends with enough of your previous lovers to know that’s a lie, y/n,’ he held out his hand to you, bowing slightly. ‘now, may i have this dance?’
‘absolutely not,’ you scoffed, but raised your eyes to see that everybody had turned to watch you. another forced smile made its way onto your lips and you took his hand. ‘just know i’m doing this for the kingdoms, and not you.’
‘that’s my girl,’ he flirted, pulling you in closer as the band began to play a slower song. ‘now look pretty and dance for the sake of our parents.’
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the laughter didn’t seem to stop. you fell back against your bed, still giggling to yourself as your best friend hid her face out of embarrassment.
‘your turn, y/n,’ another girl spoke, running across the room to deliver a freshly opened bottle of mead to you. ‘we’ve been waiting on a story about how it is to be yeonjun’s girl.’
‘well, i am definitely not yeonjun’s girl,’ you pulled yourself to sit up. ‘although, he did refer to me as such at our engagement party. still, it’s only for show. we don’t share a bedroom, we’ve never kissed, i would rather eat coal than hold his hand, and he’s already slept with half of the women in this room. the most i can say is that he’s a swell dance partner.’
‘well, i can say so too,’ another girl spoke, sending everybody into another fit of laughter. ‘and of course, i mean outside of the ballroom.’
‘yes, yes, we all got it the first time,’ your best friend looked at you with pity in her eyes. ‘i think it’s time we left y/n to sleep, she has a big day ahead of her.’
after the room was cleared of drunken girls, you locked your bedroom door and hit your head against it a few times. hiding your jealously behind humour had became a very bad habit of yours, but it was the only way you could cope. you were being forced to marry the boy you had been in love with for your entire life, and he just didn’t feel the same. it was cruel and torturous, and yet only one other person in the world knew just how much it pained you to hear of his recent hookups.
it took mere seconds for the alcohol to knock you out, but it was only a few hours later that you were being forced out of bed again. a loud knock echoed throughout the room before the door was shoved open and yeonjun stepped inside.
you gasped, sitting up and using your silk sheets to cover your almost-bare body. the only thought running through your mind was that you were sure you had locked the door, and that only palace staff had access to the key. the words were about to leave your lips before yeonjun interjected.
‘i asked for permission to wake you up this morning,’ he smirked, closing the door behind himself. ‘from your father, and from the staff. i wanted to get a feel for what i’d be getting in the morning for the rest of my existence. so far, i’m not totally appalled by you. considering the fact that you’re hardly covering yourself with those sheets, especially.’
the sound you let out in response was a mixture of a growl and a gasp. you gripped the sheets harder and tried to shuffle further into them, while yeonjun stood there looking amused.
‘get out,’ you ordered, glaring up at him. ‘we’re not yet married so you have no right coming in here without my explicit permission. my father’s permission is not enough.’
‘i only came to deliver you a hangover cure,’ he brought his hands out in front of him and presented you with an old glass bottle filled with a brown liquid. ‘the kitchen recently received the recipe for coca-cola, so i asked them for a sample.’
‘just leave it by my dressing table and get out,’ you avoided his eyes, waiting for his next move. he simply raised a brow and tilted his head. ‘thank you, yeonjun.’
‘you’re welcome, y/n,’ he smiled, crossing over the room to place down the bottle. you watched his every move like a hawk. ‘and breakfast is in an hour.’
then he was gone. the door closed behind him and you did what could only be described as a child throwing a tantrum over having to do something they didn’t want to. but there was no choice about it, obviously. the servants would arrive shortly to dress you, and then you’d be carted off to village after village in search of peace.
you slipped out of bed onto the hardwood floor and hurried towards the bottle. the throbbing headache was kicking in, and you had all the hope that this would work.
‘your highness?’ a woman’s voice called, causing you to run back towards your bed and gulp down as much of the drink as you could. ‘are you awake?’
‘yes,’ you breathed out. ‘could you give me one moment just to bathe myself alone?’
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yeonjun was flipping through an old book and producing different sounds based on how far he agreed with their views. you felt like throwing your knife across the long table and hitting him right between the eyes. of course, you had no choice but to put up with his annoying habit — although you’d bet he was simply putting it on in order to annoy you — whilst many servants surrounded the two of you.
the doors swung open and your father came towards you with purpose in his stride. you placed your cutlery down beside your plate and stood, assuming he’d ask to speak with you privately. that assumption was proven wrong when he began to speak in front of everybody.
‘a maid found an unregistered bottle beside your bed,’ he fumed, filling the room with his large voice. ‘you know the rules, y/n, and breaking them won’t do you any good when you’re queen. i won’t be able to step up and explain your mistakes, and i certainly don’t expect the prince to do so.’
‘it was me, sir,’ yeonjun stood. ‘i delivered the bottle to her early this morning, it was a new recipe i wanted to share.’
your father looked down the table and over at yeonjun, the anger in his expression slowly dissipating. you smiled down at your plate, mentally thanking him for saving you.
‘from now on, register every item that goes into and comes out of your rooms,’ he spoke in a softer tone. ‘when you’re married and crowned the new royals in charge, mistakes like this won’t pass. it only takes one servant for the word to be spread, and for your image to be ruined by the rumours.’
‘yes, father,’ you bowed your head. yeonjun stayed silent, but mirrored your actions.
‘the carriage is waiting outside,’ the king continued. ‘add some layers so you don’t freeze, and be friendly to the townsfolk who came to watch your departure.’
there were minutes of silence that followed. your father’s footsteps echoed throughout the room before the large, wooden doors creaked open and then slammed closed. servants began to whisper and yeonjun seated himself with a kind smile on his lips. it was all just for show.
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your mother buttoned your cape at the collar before grabbing your face and pressing a kiss to your forehead. you smiled sadly and made a silent promise between yourselves that you would keep yourself safe. only another woman would understand the dangers of travelling alone with a man, whether that man was involved with you or not.
‘the king and queen to be,’ you were introduced, followed by the doors opening and the sound of cheering filling the area. both you and yeonjun put on a smile and he offered his arm for you to hold onto as he led you down the stairs. children jumped with joy at the sight of your dress, and women fanned themselves at the sight of the man on your arm. if it weren’t for the audience, you’d be rolling your eyes already.
the carriage was cramped, as always. you never minded if it was just you and your own family members, but being forced to sit that close to yeonjun was going to make for an awful few weeks. on the seat, there was a basket of baked goods and clothing items for the villagers. you wanted to question how the next basket would be delivered, but you assumed your parents would have already thought of that.
yeonjun helped you inside and took a moment to wave everybody goodbye before he sat beside you. you scooted as far away from him as you possibly could and faced the wall.
‘we’re going to be sitting here beside each other for the next three hours,’ he reminded. ‘maybe i can offer something more interesting than the wall.’
‘i actually think the wall will offer much more intelligent conversation,’ you shot back. ‘i want a peaceful ride.’
‘sorry, your peaceful majesty,’ he mocked. ‘i had no idea you were such a genius.’
‘how dare you?’ your head whipped around to face him. ‘i would have loved to go to school. i would have loved to read and to learn, not be forced to practice crochet patterns and piano. do not mock a woman whose only purpose was to marry, because i can assure you it wasn’t my choice.’
‘i didn’t mean to offend,’ he sighed. ‘i’m sorry, truly.’
‘gosh, yeonjun,’ you scoffed in disbelief. ‘i can’t believe so many women want to sleep with you when you famously can’t go three minutes without displaying that you’re a misogynist.’
‘you think too little of me,’ he rolled his eyes. ‘i only meant to throw an insult back at you. i didn’t think about the context, only how i wanted to fight you back.’
‘this marriage will never work if you can’t respect me,’ you turned your head away. ‘i’m not asking you to love me or even to like me, but a bit of respect would be nice. i’m not a joke, i don’t need saving when another man approaches me. i have fought my own battles for my entire life, and i want you to respect that i’m my own person and not just your queen.’
‘i do respect you, y/n,’ yeonjun sighed. ‘we’ve always been this way. you take the first chance to insult me and i take a jab back at you. just because we’re going to be married doesn’t mean we have to act all grown-up from now on.’
‘but i do,’ you met his gaze. ‘a queen has to be perfect. perfectly dressed, perfectly well-spoken, perfect manners, perfect attitude and a perfect reputation. a king merely has to fulfil his duties, and the rest is his business. he can have as many mistresses as he pleases, he can drink any day of the week at any time of the day, and nobody will blink an eye.’
‘and you think i’m going to cheat on you with every woman in the kingdom?’ he laughed. ‘drink myself to death? ruin the image my father created for our family?’
‘did you not invite one of my girls to your room last night?’ you raised a brow. ‘did you not grab a sample of coca-cola for yourself as well?’
‘no, i didn’t,’ something in his expression shifted. ‘i haven’t even looked at another woman since i proposed. this marriage is for show, so there’s no way i’m going to risk being caught being disloyal and ruin the whole illusion.’
‘you’ve gotten away with it for years,’ you clicked your tongue. ‘has all the secrecy and tiptoeing around finally gotten to you?’
‘you don’t know me, y/n,’ he frowned. ‘as much as you’d like to believe you do, you don’t. family comes first for me, and now that you’re part of my family, you come first. i don’t want to risk ruining you or us, so i’m doing the right thing. i’m sorry for spending my days of freedom doing the things i wanted before i would be inevitably made king of two kingdoms.’
‘freedom?’ you rolled your eyes. ‘and what freedom will you be losing as king? i, on the other hand, now belong to you. i belong to you. i’m your wife, i’ll mother your children, i’ll greet the townspeople everyday while you make all of the important decisions, and i’ll never get to experience love.’
‘oh, please,’ he dropped his head back against the seat, closing his eyes. ‘i’m done arguing with you.’
‘because you know i’m right and i’m winning,’ you had to get the last word in. ‘because you know everything i said to be true, and you can’t deny it.’
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the first thing you noticed was that it was muddy. yeonjun had dropped down from the carriage already and was holding a hand out to you, but you only stared at the ground and then back at your dress. he groaned and lifted you from the carriage into his arms, before placing you down on solid ground. the women audibly gasped and cooed at the sight.
‘thank you,’ you smiled. yeonjun left your side to reach for the basket, before placing it in your arms.
‘prince yeonjun, and princess y/n,’ the carriage driver introduced, bowing as he did so. the two of you smiled and bowed too, before the townspeople came excitedly towards you. yeonjun watched as you were practically swept off your feet and brought into the village.
the carriage was parked elsewhere. you handed out the food and clothing while yeonjun gave hefty donations to each of the market stalls. the children swarmed around you and tried to play, some of the girls reaching for your hand and asking for you to dance with them. it was a fun interaction complimented by the live band that played jolly music. for once, you enjoyed the obligation. the people loved you and were thankful for you, and that made you feel so good inside. becoming queen was something you definitely didn’t want to do, but you thought it’d be a little bit easier now that you were loved and respected by your people. well, they were currently yeonjun’s people as you were visiting around his kingdom.
‘i think the queen would like to rest now,’ a woman spoke, placing her hand on her daughter’s back to pull her away from the crowd. the rest of the children began to space out, and you looked at yeonjun for help. ‘i can take you.’
‘oh, thank you very much,’ you smiled at the woman, and began following her through the village. yeonjun caught up with you and offered his arm, you wrapped your own arm around his and held onto his bicep for support. the ground was very uneven, that was the only reason.
the sun was starting to set when you were left alone in the room you’d booked for the night. yeonjun began undressing, unclipping his cufflinks and unbuttoning his waistcoat. you choked out a sound of surprise and spun around.
‘what’s the matter, princess?’ he pried as he shrugged off the waistcoat and placed it on the bed. ‘do you want me to step outside to change and raise suspicion?’
‘you could have warned me,’ you huffed. ‘watching you strip wasn’t part of the deal.’
‘these people have to really believe we’re in love,’ he began with the excuses. ‘for all we know, they could be peeking through our window right this second. and i can guarantee they’ll all be listening out for some bed squeaking tonight.’
‘shut up, choi,’ you snapped. ‘you can’t manipulate me into sleeping with you ‘for the people’.’
‘you can’t keep using my surname against me,’ he joked. ‘it’ll be yours in a matter of months.’
‘stop,’ you were furious now. ‘you’re being mean. i’m having my name and my freedom stripped away from me by you, and you think it’s all fun and games because you get to be king. the reality will hit you hard when you figure out that ruling isn’t as easy as you think it is. and i’m not going to become your wife, i’ll be the queen who stands just as tall as you will.’
‘and how easy will that be for you?’ he pressed. ‘you hate responsibility. you love drinking until you pass out and sleeping with the men who fall at the knee in front of you as soon as they hear of your status. you’re no better than me, in fact you’ll be a worse queen than i’ll be king.’
‘if i’m no better, why do you think so highly of yourself?’ you argued, and yeonjun had already spun around to start unbuttoning his shirt. that pissed you off. you ripped out the bows in your hair and set them down, before undressing yourself down to your undergarments.
the bed was going to be yours. you stomped around and huffed as you picked up yeonjun’s neatly folded clothes and tossed them to the ground. he spun around in disbelief and his eyes widened at the sight of your barely-clad self. you got under the sheets and pulled them up over your head, leaving yeonjun half-dressed in the middle of the room. he sighed heavily and moved to blow out the lamps around the room.
‘i wish you would stop fighting me,’ he spoke softly. ‘i don’t want to spend the rest of my life fighting with you.’
the rest of his life. the rest of your life. you were going to be trapped in a marriage with no love and no affection. you’d never get to experience sleepy morning kisses or intimate nights, you wouldn’t be introduced to his friends at parties as the woman he loves, your children would never tell stories of how dearly their parents loved each other. he wouldn’t hold your hand or kiss you goodbye, he wouldn’t fix together a poorly made soup when you’re sick or hold you when you’re struggling. a loveless, cold marriage doomed for eternity.
‘excuse me,’ you rushed out of bed and through the room until you were pulling open the door and leaning against it from the other side. yeonjun took a seat at the foot of the bed and he felt his heart ache. both for you and for himself.
it was miserable. you’d never get to be happy, and neither would he. your lives were dedicated to reuniting two rival kingdoms and combining them into one. the whole point of your trip was to convince everyone of your love and help them adjust to the collaboration, not a romantic getaway to test your love. you lived to serve your parents and your people. it was either you spent everyday feeling hopeless and miserable or you sucked it up and learned to be happy in an environment not built for happiness.
you let the tears fall. it didn’t matter. you sobbed and wiped furiously at your eyes, your vision turning blurry after the amount of tears filling it.
‘why so glum, princess?’ a man’s voice, and you gasped. he placed his hand over your mouth and held your arms behind your back in an attempt to keep you quiet. ‘make a sound or scream and i’ll kill you.’
your mother had taught you what to do in this situation. he’ll kill you even if you’re quiet, so you need to kick and scream and cry for help. and when you’re free, go for the weak spots. eyes, nose, stomach, and you know where. you squirmed aggressively and freed your arms, reaching forward to grab his hand and rip it away from your mouth.
‘yeonjun!’ you cried, still flailing around in the man’s arms. he reached into his pocket and pulled out a dagger, holding it up to your throat as a warning.
‘i mean it, princess,’ he spat. ‘i was sent here to snatch you, dead or alive. your father’s stupid for trying to get us to join him, i know hundreds who won’t do it.’
‘that’s not her doing,’ yeonjun interrupted. ‘get your filthy hands off my fiancée.’
‘what are you going to do?’ the man snorted out a laugh. ‘i’ve raised chickens with more muscle than you’ve got.’
you took the distraction as a chance to elbow the man hard in the stomach. his dagger sliced across your arm as he dropped the ground, and you winced momentarily. yeonjun grabbed you but you pulled your arm back and placed your foot firmly on the man’s hand. he groaned while you reached down to slip the dagger out of his grasp. once again, yeonjun reached for you and pulled you back, but you only slipped out of his hold again and returned to the bedroom.
you grabbed your cape and fastened it over your shoulders when you heard more disturbance outside of the room. when you stepped outside, the man had grabbed yeonjun by the collar and was holding him against the wall. you looked around for a solution, and noticed a table holding a single lamp. you blew the flame out and tossed it aside, spilling wax all over the wooden floorboards. as you lifted the table, you thought that maybe the hot lamp would have been a better choice.
still, you lifted the small table above your head and used your strength to throw it towards the man. it hit him over the head, and yeonjun quickly ducked out of the way onto the ground. the man dropped silently to the ground and blood trickled out from the small wound in his head.
‘we should go,’ you breathed out, feeling the ache in your arms. not to mention the sting of the slice you’d endured from his dagger. ‘quickly before another shows up.’
‘thank you,’ he cleared his throat, his eyes full of worry. ‘y/n, you’re bleeding.’
‘don’t pity me,’ you rolled your eyes. ‘i don’t need your pity, and evidently i don’t need you to come and save me.’
‘why’d you call for me?’ that same smirk was on his lips again. the sight of it made your blood boil and your body tremble slightly with anger. ‘if you don’t need saving.’
‘you seriously need a reality check,’ your eyes narrowed. ‘i can’t wait for the day somebody finally ruins your confidence.’
the sound of a door slamming cut you off, yeonjun grabbed your uninjured arm and began dragging you down the unstable stairs. if it wasn’t for the current life or death situation, you would have fought him on his need to act a hero once again. instead, you just followed along.
outside of the inn, a few more men were waiting. yeonjun began to run, but when he noticed the arrows flying towards you, he shoved you aside and ordered you to hide. you caught yourself before you fell face first into the mud, and ran towards the stables. the bottom of your white slip dress was now dripping and drenched in mud, and you had smudges of blood ruining the upper half.
you looked for your family horse in the stables, a smile lighting up your features when you spotted her. in a struggle to unlock the gates, you noticed hurried footsteps approaching you. but much to your delight, it was only yeonjun catching up with you. no words were exchanged as he squeezed his way past you and opened the gate easily. the usual huff or groan that you’d respond with was nowhere to be found, you simply looked at him with thankful eyes as he guided your horse out.
‘you first,’ he ordered, holding a hand out for you. you nodded and climbed up onto the horse. you grabbed hold of the reins as yeonjun sat comfortably behind you. your breath hitched when you felt the warmth of his body surrounding yours, and his firm chest pressing against your back. ‘we’ll be best off going through the woods if we want to lose them.’
you nodded in agreement and pulled on the reins, sending your horse into a hurried run towards the thick woods. the men followed the sound of her hooves hitting the ground, still clutching onto their bows as arrows repeatedly zoomed past you. it was unnerving, the whipping sound of arrows and the thump as they pierced into trees all around you. yeonjun tightened his hold on you in order to calm your nerves. the woods were getting thicker and thicker, branches scratching against your bare skin and tears beginning to form.
‘i won’t let anything happen to you,’ yeonjun whispered beside your ear, but his voice was shaky and unsure. ‘i promise.’
the moment was ruined when your horse stopped and began to refuse to move. you held on tightly to the reins, despite her insisting on throwing you off.
‘over there!’ a man’s voice announced, followed by the sound of more arrows flying past.
the tears began to fall. the horse finally agreed to move, but the amount of arrows in motion was becoming dangerous. you could hardly see due to the speed, the darkness, the amount of greenery and now your tears.
‘let go of the reins, y/n,’ yeonjun wrapped his arms around you waist and pulled you flush against him. you shook your head, letting out a sob. ‘let go!’
it was an order now. the reins slipped from your grasp and yeonjun dragged you down the floor with him. you landed harshly on a mess of twigs and mud, but yeonjun took most of the fall. he coughed, having been winded. your horse began to throw a fit once again, before a pained sound that you’d never forget echoed throughout the trees.
‘no,’ you whimpered. ‘please, no!’
yeonjun couldn’t stop you. you picked yourself up and began to run towards your horse. her beautiful white fur began to turn red from the multiple injuries she sustained from the arrows. she laid motionless on her side, and you couldn’t hold back the sobbing and screaming. blood soaked through your dress and began to paint your hands and arms, and then your face when you tried to wipe away your tears.
‘we have to go, y/n!’ yeonjun grabbed you by the arms and pulled you back, but you shrugged him off and went back to stroking over your horse’s lifeless snout. ‘if we don’t leave now, we’ll both be dead!’
as irrational as you wanted to be, he was right. you felt numb as he grabbed you and pulled you to stand. you didn’t really understand what was going on, your mind was hazy. yeonjun held you behind a tree while you tried to calm down, a hand placed over your mouth to silence your cries. you only snapped out of it when you heard him wince in pain, and noticed the arrow that had just skimmed past his arm.
this time, you grabbed his hand and began running with him. you had no idea of which direction you were running in, just that you wanted to get far away from your attackers. you began to grow hopeless after running yourselves to exhaustion, when you spotted an old, small house not too far away. the coast seemed clear, so you silently agreed on the plan with yeonjun and made a run for the house.
he tried the door handle first while you scanned the area in a paranoid and erratic manner. it was stiff, but he managed to nudge the door open. he grabbed your hand and dragged you inside before slamming the door behind you.
‘close all of the curtains,’ he ordered, and you did so happily. you liked this side of him. he was assertive and put-together. ‘i’ll block all of these doors off so they have no chance of getting inside, but we have to be quiet.’
it was almost half an hour of making sure they wouldn’t be able to break in, and all you could think of was wrapping up yeonjun’s wound. that thought made you feel stupid, because you knew the slice on your arm wasn’t bothering him in the slightest. still, you began searching the cupboards for anything to wrap it up. of course, it was practically bare. but if by magic, there sat some gauze on a high shelf. you climbed up until you could reach it, as well as grabbing the only knife left behind by whoever used to reside here.
‘come here,’ you called softly. ‘we need to wrap that wound up before you bleed out.’
you pulled out a chair and took a seat at the small table. it was incredibly dark, but your eyes were adjusting enough for you to make out the objects in your hands. yeonjun pulled out the only other chair and sat close to you. he grabbed your wrist and turned your arm over.
‘and what about you?’ he sounded tired, the sound tugging at your heart. ‘you’re grieving, y/n. i’ll wrap your arm up and you’ll go to bed, and i’ll take care of myself.’
‘yeonjun, please,’ your voice broke. ‘i’m too afraid to sleep.’
he ignored your words and went straight to wrapping your arm up in the gauze. when he got to the end, he held the material between his teeth and sawed away at it with the knife. then he tied it into a dainty bow, making sure to keep it pretty as he felt you deserved.
‘now—’ he tried to speak, but you cut him off immediately.
‘i’m not tired,’ you reminded. ‘let me do the same for you.’
yeonjun didn’t want to fight. he’d lost all desire to rile you up. he’d seen a new side of you, and his opinion was starting to change. you weren’t heartless, you cared so much about everybody and everything. he’d seen you break down over a horse you’d loved throughout your childhood, you saved his life, and you were begging for him to let you help him.
he didn’t see you as a person, that was his problem. as children, you were an annoying little girl who always wanted to be in his space. as teens, you were rude and could never see eye-to-eye with him. and as adults, you made it as clear as possible that you wanted nothing to do with him. it was rejection after rejection. you’d glare and roll your eyes, scoff and groan every time he spoke. he wasn’t invited to join you and your friends, he only ever saw you at formal events. you were cold towards any man in your path, including close friends of his that he’d grown up with. all of this just painted you as a dark, looming presence in his life. you always had something sarcastic to say, you snapped and broke character easily around him, you always had the perfect insult to throw his way and you wouldn’t dream of viewing him in any way other than the opinion you’d created of him in your mind.
you wrapped the fabric tightly around his arm, and he tensed his arm in pain. he looked down to meet your concerned gaze and he relaxed again, but he was hoping you hadn’t noticed.
‘you’re so full of surprises, princess,’ he whispered.
‘what’s that supposed to mean?’ expecting an insult, you pulled tightly on the bandage again. yeonjun grunted in pain, and you felt your body heat up.
‘perfect self defence, stamina for running, you can control a horse, you’re strong, and you know how to wrap gauze,’ he smiled, ignoring that you were totally taking everything he said the wrong way. ‘i was thinking you were just a girl dressed in bows and lace, dreaming of owning a castle.’
‘well, you don’t know me very well,’ you tied off the end of gauze, your hand lingering on the sleeve of his shirt for a little too long. your eyes dropped to the area of his chest visible due to the first few buttons being left undone. you guessed he didn’t find time to fix himself in between all the running and trying not to die. ‘i never wanted to be queen. i love bows and lace, but the new castle will be too lonely and too large.’
‘you have a point,’ he agreed. ‘it was built way too far away from the centre of the kingdom. and what will they do with the two empty castles?’
‘don’t you mean, what will we do?’ you sighed and stood up, placing the knife down onto the table and approaching the bed. ‘don’t you wonder who used to live here? and how come they left all of this behind?’
‘all of what?’ yeonjun followed you, stopping in front of you. you were only inches apart, but he stood taller than you. ‘it was poorly built, it’s cold, and it’s in the middle of nowhere.’
‘it’s quaint and beautiful,’ you whispered, realising there was no need to speak when you were this close. ‘much less lonely than a large castle with too many rooms to count.’
yeonjun grabbed your hand, interlocking your fingers. the both of you watched your hands before locking gazes.
‘what would you do?’ he whispered back. ‘with the castles.’
‘schools,’ you felt your body forcing you to step closer to him. ‘education for everyone, no matter their status. every girl—’
his lips pressed against yours. only for a moment, and it was the lightest touch, but it made you feel warm inside. when your lips parted, he was still only inches away from you. he dropped your hand and placed one hand in your hair in order to pull you in again. you moaned into his mouth and let yourself melt into the kiss.
‘i’m sorry,’ you pulled away, eyes closed and lips pursed. ‘i’m so sorry, i don’t know what came over me.’
‘why are you sorry?’ he leaned to place his forehead against yours, his eyes also falling shut. ‘it’s just you and me, princess… it’s just you and me for the rest of our lives.’
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yeonjun didn’t sleep. you’d passed out with your head on his chest hours ago, and he laid thinking about you and the kiss you’d shared. never in a million years did he think he would fall in love with you, but now he was realising he just wasn’t allowing himself to fall. why did it bother him that you paid him no mind? and why did he enjoy poking and prodding at your nerves until you inevitably snapped? because he wanted to be something more to you.
the sun shone intensely through the gaps in the curtains. you whined and buried your face into yeonjun’s chest without realising what exactly you were doing. he lifted his hand and held it over your eyes, protecting you from the sun. he wanted you to keep sleeping, he wanted to keep thinking, he wanted to stay in this small space alone with you forever.
alas, your eyes opened and you were met with yeonjun looking down at you. immediately, you sat up and apologised. he just smiled and stretched his arms above his head, making his shirt ride up above his hips.
‘you look terrible,’ you commented. ‘you’re covered in blood.’
‘i could say the same for you, princess,’ he gave you a lopsided, half smile. ‘your mother is going to hate me.’
‘my mother loves you,’ you laughed shortly. ‘you could set a village alight and she would still defend you.’
‘we should set off to get home before nightfall,’ he suggested. ‘i’d rather deal with our parents now rather after two nights of us fighting for our lives.’
the walk home took several hours. it was easier once you’d made it onto the path, and once yeonjun had insisted on holding your hand so that you wouldn’t fall behind. walking into the castle grounds was terrifying, the stall keepers whispered amongst themselves and mothers covered their children’s eyes. who could blame them? the future king and queen were walking hand-in-hand, covered in blood and in clothing that had been ripped and stained black and brown. not to mention that you were both barely clothed, having had to flee from the inn mid-preparation for bed.
word spread like wildfire and your mother came running out of the castle to see if it was true. she pulled you away from yeonjun and into her arms, checking you for injury. then she ushered the both of you inside as quickly as possible.
you were taken away by servants to be bathed, treated and dressed in appropriate clothing. for the next few hours, all you could think about yeonjun. the way his lips felt, the way his fingertips rubbed against your scalp to send you to sleep, his warm hand in yours, the skin showing beneath his shirt, the way his gaze now softened whenever he looked at you. it made you feel giddy and childlike, and you were kind of thankful for the men who’d tried to hunt you down.
yeonjun didn’t seem to be around. he wasn’t seated at the table for meals, you didn’t see him walking around the castle, and you hadn’t heard anyone else mention his name. a part of you wondered if it had all been a dream.
that was, until nightfall.
the shock of everything you had experienced and the pain you felt every time you relived the memory of your horse being shot down had kept you inside. not just inside the castle, but inside of your room. so when it came to the night, you were finally free to walk around the castle.
you peeked through your door before opening it fully, and began walking towards the servant’s entrance into the kitchen. it was no longer mandatory for use, per your mother’s request, but you loved how quickly it took you into the kitchen. you stepped down the steep staircase and pushed open the door at the bottom, only to be met with a figure standing by the sink. they turned back at the disturbance and you realised that, in all his glory, it was yeonjun.
‘y/n,’ he practically sighed. it was obvious, even under the candlelight, that he was tired. he’d had no chance to sleep, not that you knew it yet, and was too shaken up to do so even if he’d had the chance. ‘i didn’t mean to disappear on you.’
‘i’m not upset, yeonjun,’ he loved the way you said his name when it wasn’t coming out as a snarl or mid-insult. ‘i was worried about, if i’m being honest.’
‘i had to talk with our fathers,’ he placed his cup down. ‘they’re going to put in a new law surrounding treason.’
‘and that is?’ you came towards him, stopping just a few feet away from him.
‘punishment of death,’ he sighed. ‘i don’t have hope.’
‘that’s awful,’ you agreed. ‘but we don’t have much choice, do we? it’ll either do well to scare them off, or we’ll be sentencing hundreds of men to their deaths.’
‘i’m worried that it won’t work,’ he admitted. ‘that they’ll come back for you and you won’t make it out alive this time. then does it really matter if they’re killed for their crime?’
‘we’re protected here,’ you reassured. ‘the world won’t take me away that soon, i’m not done bothering you yet.’
yeonjun couldn’t take it anymore, he’d been going crazy thinking about you all day. he placed his hands on either side of you and kissed you hard to try and portray at least some of the emotion he felt towards you. you wrapped your arms around his neck and reciprocated the kiss, no longer feeling the need to apologise for wanting to be this close to him.
‘and i’m not done loving you yet,’ he mumbled between kisses, making you pull back with a smile.
‘don’t tell me you’ve fallen in love with me over the past twenty four hours,’ you smirked. yeonjun felt his heart skip a beat at this new flirty side of you.
he didn’t feel the need to answer, it was obvious that you were right about his feelings. he lifted your chin and placed another tender kiss to your lips. finally, for the first time, you actually felt at peace, and you didn’t feel like disrupting it.
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tenswrld · 2 years
Text
2 ways
yeonjun x reader ; angst drabble?
summary: you don’t know what you are, but you know that you two need each other more than you think. too bad yeonjun fucks it all up.
a/n: baby came home 2 / valentine inspired i am starting to think everything i write is based off a song also this was not meant to be a yeonjun bday fic but i just happened to finish it today OOOOPS
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you didn’t know what yeonjun was to you, but you knew that you cared about him.
you cared about him enough to where you thought about him even when he wasn’t around. you thought about him when you were cold and wishing for something (someone) to keep you warm. you thought about him when you were grocery shopping and bought snacks that you don’t eat, but yeonjun loves. you didn’t even notice that you had started sleeping with a pillow in between your arms, too used to holding yeonjun at night.
you kept him close because you felt like you needed him around. unfortunately, it didn’t feel like that feeling was reciprocated.
[y/n]: jun?
[y/n]: you still coming over?
you chewed your lip anxiously, waiting for his response. but, it never came.
[y/n]: just shoot me a text if you aren’t, that’s all i ask
[y/n]: please?
sighing, you picked up your phone to dial the one other person who would likely know where yeonjun is. 
“hello?”
“hey, soobin, is yeonjun with you?” you heard what sounded like a party in the background, giving you an idea of what yeonjun was doing.
“uh, yeah. not currently, but he’s here. he’s um,” he paused. that’s all y/n needed to hear to know what he was doing. “he’s occupied.”
“okay, thanks for letting me know.” you tried not to make yourself sound too disappointed. “make sure he gets home safe, okay?”
“want me to tell him you called? were you waiting?” soobin yelled into the phone.
“no, no, it’s fine. don’t worry. have fun,” you said. your voice cracked slightly and you hoped that soobin didn’t hear. 
you threw your phone down onto the coffee table in front of you where you had laid out all the snacks that you had recently bought. the tv was on, waiting patiently for yeonjun to show up so he could choose a movie to watch. your body moved slowly and sadly, turning off the tv and putting all the snacks away. 
it wasn’t the first time you had been let down by yeonjun, but it was the first time that you gave up on waiting.
~~~
you couldn’t bring yourself to block his contact, but luckily you had enough self control to refrain from texting him. though, it’s not like it was that hard since he never texted you first. 
it had been a week since you last talked to or seen yeonjun. you were curled up into your couch, eating the snacks that you bought for him even though you didn’t like the aftertaste it left in your mouth. in the midst of watching your favorite show, you heard frantic knocks on your door.
cautiously you looked through your peep hole and almost gasped at the sight of yeonjun leaning against your door, his fist knocking against it once more.
“c’mon, y/n, let me in,” you could hear him say softly. he almost sounded sad, making your heart twist.
reluctantly, you opened your door slowly, letting your eyes trail over his figure. he looked like a model like always, clearly dressed up as if he just came from a party. when you met his eyes, you noticed how relieved he looked to see you.
“y/n,” he exasperated, letting out a breath. “can i come in?”
quietly, you stepped aside to let him through. his eyes followed you as you reclaimed your spot on the couch, looking up at him expectantly.
“did you need something?” you asked, annoyed with the way that he just stood there staring at you. 
he seemed a little shocked at your tone, stumbling over his words as he responded. “...i just haven’t seen you in a while. missed you.”
you scoffed and shook your head, refusing to believe anything that he was saying. you eyed him when took a seat next to you on the couch, but still said nothing to him. you could feel his gaze burning into your cheek, as if he was waiting for you to talk.
“...i’m really sorry about the night of the party, y/n, i promise i just lost track of time -” yeonjun paused when he saw you shaking your head, frowning at the fact that you couldn’t even look him in the eye.
“you don’t need to lie to me, yeonjun.” his frown deepened once he heard you call him by his full name. no jun, or junnie. he would even be happy if you called him an idiot, but you didn’t. “i know what you were doing. if you were sorry, then we would’ve talked about it sooner. why now?”
yeonjun didn’t know how to respond. “you never called.”
your patience was starting to run thin. you finally turned to glare at him. “the phone works two ways, you know. sorry that you didn’t have the guts to call me first.”
yeonjun averted his gaze to his hands, which were itching to hold yours. he remained silent, making you sigh. his raised his head to meet your eyes, wanting to hear what you were gonna say next.
“if you don’t want to be with me, like really be with me, then let’s end this here. i don’t think that i can do this anymore.”
he swore he felt his heart stop. his eyes widened and his hands reached desperately for yours, pulling you closer to him. “i do want to be with you! i-i do, i swear.”
“do you?” you asked him, shaking your head and gently pulling your hands away from his. “sleeping with someone else while i sit here and wait for you doesn’t really show me that you want to be with me. and you wait a whole week to tell me that you’re sorry?” 
yeonjun could feel his heart sinking to his stomach the more that you spoke. he could sense your anger, and could feel you slipping through his fingertips. “i didn’t sleep with her, i-i wouldn’t let it get that far.”
before he could continue, you cut him off. “you didn’t sleep with her, but you were still with her, yeonjun. you decided in that moment that you’d rather be there than here. you knew that we had plans, and you couldn’t have at least just let me know?” you cursed at yourself when your voice began to crack, tears pooling at your eyes. “do you know how stupid i felt?”
yeonjun cupped your face in his large hands and swiped his thumbs at your stray tears, mumbling soft apologies and pleading for you to look at him. he didn’t know what else to say and could only sit there and beg you to forgive him before he lost you. you let him hold you in his arms before gently peeling his hands from your face and placing them back in his own lap.
“you should go, jun,” you said softly, looking anywhere but at him.
yeonjun shook his head in a panic, his words getting caught in his throat. “no,” he croaked. “if i leave, then that means this is over.”
“it is over,” you sputtered through your tears.
yeonjun felt himself start to cry. “n-no. it’s not over for me. i’ll be better, y/n, just give me one more chance.” you still refused to look at him, making yeonjun sob. “please, y/n. i will do anything.” unfortunately, yeonjun’s begging fell on deaf ears.
“you need to go, yeonjun.” yeonjun felt like he couldn’t breathe when you finally looked him in the eye. he knew that you were being serious, and that this was the end of you and him.
yeonjun let you lead him to the door, but stood outside of it looking at you as his tears fell down his cheeks. “if you really want me to leave you alone, then i will. but i won’t stop trying to get you back,” he declared with a quivering lip. “i know i fucked it all up, but,” he paused, wiping pathetically at his eyes, “at least tell me i have a chance?” he pleaded, eyes searching your own for any sign of love left.
“bye, yeonjun,” you whispered while pursing your lips together. “i wish it could’ve been different.”
shoulders falling in defeat, yeonjun watched you shut the door on him, shutting him out of your life.
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Text
Yeonjun text scenarios! (Until you're home edition)
Emma talks! - i missed them okay?! I miss them so much :( so here's just a random texts of the couple <33 side note, Jia is like a cousin (?) Idk man i just created her to fit the scenario :))
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Taglist ! - @ckline35 @stealanity @hiyyihsflwrs @recreatiun @faelyncore @cookiehaos @marsneo
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truly-twirls · 1 year
Note
Hello! Honestly you're the first acc i think of when it comes to writing hurt/comfort because of your fics. They're amazing and so so relatable.
tw//depression
If your requests are open, can I please request a Yeonjun fic? My depressive episodes have been coming back lately so I felt like I kinda needed this.
I just want some comfort fic with Yeonjun where his s/o feel like they're not good enough and have trouble releasing out their problems to him and feels like they're just so pathetic and weak and feel like a burden to everyone.
Sorry I just wanted to know how someone who genuinely loves someone would react and say if their s/o was going through such things. I might just be self projecting here as well tho my bad 😅
But! Incase you aren't taking up requests, that's perfectly fine as well so please don't feel pressured. Your other fics are honestly so comforting and nice so it's totally fine. I hope the day will be nicer to you when you read this <33
hehe hi i'm sorry this took so long, also sorry if it's not as great as you'd like, i had a bit of writer's block,, requests are still open!!
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playing catch-up - c. yeonjun
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Word Count: 1,364
Warnings: Reader is in a depressive episode, Self-deprecation, Brief food mention
Characters: Choi Yeonjun, Choi Soobin (Mentioned), Choi Beomgyu (Mentioned), Heuning Kai (Mentioned), Kang Taehyun (Mentioned)
Genre: Request, Comfort, Fluff (Kind of)
AO3 Link
🌱🌱🌱
‘Why do we, the people, believe we can overcome anything?’
‘What gives us the will to keep on going, even with 200, 300, even 1000 tons upon our weak shoulders?’
‘Well, we’ll never truly know the answer.’
‘As it is different for every person, and their own experiences threaded into their memories.’
That was the big takeaway? A three hour lecture on a Monday morning, and that was all it had to offer? This was where your money was going towards?
Great. Fantastic. Absolutely amazing.
You sighed and packed up your journal and writing utensils, tossing them into your bookbag, and walked out of the dreary lecture hall. You still had three more classes today, with little to no break in between any of them, and to top it all off: They all lasted more than an hour each.
-Four hours later-
You felt stupid.
No, you felt incapable.
The fact that your train of thought had steadied itself for so long, so long. Only for it to collide into a wall that you didn’t even know was there.
It was embarrassing,
You felt embarrassed.
You are embarrassing.
No matter how much you kept looking through notes, dissecting every word that came out of the professors’ mouths, nothing stuck. 
It was like you never even went to lecture.
How could you be investing so much energy, so much money, and your mind couldn’t muster the ability to even learn anything?
Honestly, how stupid could you get? 
And then you really started to think.
It already felt like you were never in lecture.
Was it worth it? 
Honestly if one were to truly sit down and think, would one day really hurt?
And that’s how it started.
Just one day.
Then it turned into three days.
Then seven.
Twelve.
It’s been three weeks since you last went to a lecture, let alone the dining hall or any university events.
You’ve just been sitting, lying down, pacing, any type of movement really. But it never left the four walls of your dorm. 
It was just you.
For three weeks.
Then, at 3am, there was a pounding at the door that jolted you awake. If it’s the fucking RA asking about another incident, you were gonna resort to sleeping at a motel.
“Y/N?”
That voice… Is it..?
“Y/N, please open up, I saw your lights on from the window outside. Please, love?”
It was him.
As you walked towards the door to let your boyfriend inside, you saw a glimpse of yourself in the mirror. 
There stood a wrinkled shirt from weeks ago, sweatpants with holes torn from being snagged onto door handles a few too many times, and a ghastly face. One that read nothing but despair, one that barely passed as alive even.
Are you really going to face Yeonjun like this?
After not seeing each other for a month?
Is this really who he deserves to see after spending such a long time in another country for an abroad study?
Unfortunately, your doubts were cut short because of the sound of keys jingling.
You had forgotten that you gave him a spare key a few months ago, who knew how difficult that would make things in the future.
“Y/N? Is everything alright? Soobin told me you haven’t showed up to Literature in almost a month..”
“Not the only one.”
“And Beomgyu asked me why you’ve been skipping out on History and lunch with him.”
“The dining hall is expensive..”
“On top of that, Taehyun and Kai asked if you dropped your Statistics lecture.”
“Okay!! Fine!! I haven’t taken a single fucking step out of this dorm in a month, so fucking what!?!”
There wasn’t another voice to be heard for minutes at a time, only the sound of an exhausted fan.
You hadn’t meant for that to be aloud. Honestly, you just wanted it to pass through your mind and move on.
But the look in Yeonjun’s eyes. There wasn’t a chance that this could pass like the clouds beyond the glass window.
“This isn’t because of me right?”
You resorted to sitting on your bed, internally stuttering as you worked to put together a response.
“I know I was gone for a while but.. It didn’t mean I stopped caring, I thought about you every day.. Y/N, what happened?”
You used a blanket to try and muffle your sobs, this felt pathetic. Yeonjun telling you how he feels and you not saying anything did nothing to ease his worries.
“Please Y/N, give me something.. Anything, I need to know how I can be there for you..”
“Junnie, I’m honestly fine.. It’s just something stupid, I’ll get over it soon.”
At this point your boyfriend stood in front of you, grabbing your hands, “Baby, we both know it’s more than that.. It’s just you and I here. The world is deaf right now, anything you tell me tonight will stay with us. I want to listen to you, whether it’s your happiest moments or your darkest troubles.”
A smile forced its way to your face, although small, the little sparks you feel with Yeonjun returned. Oh, it was such a comforting feeling, as if taking off a sleeping mask after a long slumber, your soul welcomed the light.
“It’s not really that dramatic, love. I just.. um.. How do I say this..”
“Try not to downplay what you feel, it’s real. Your struggles are real, I think saying it’s dumb or not a big deal would make it harder to talk about, yeah?” As he spoke, his hands ran through stray pieces of hair. If he noticed how oily it became, Yeonjun said nothing about it.
“Okay.. well… It became harder to understand, like, what was going on? I don’t know, it just seemed like anything a professor would say, I never got it. Like, I just couldn’t make sense of anything being said.”
You took a breath as Yeonjun finally joined you on the edge of your mattress, “I’m listening.”
“I guess I thought that there was no point in going to lectures if I couldn’t understand what was happening, but I didn’t want to ask any of the guys for help or my friends. I don’t know, it just felt like a bother since everyone has been so stressed lately.. Who would want to take the time to help me?”
Silence filled the air again, but the air didn’t feel as thick, as Yeonjun thought about what to say, you still felt safe.
“I understand, baby. I think when we first met, one of the things I admired about you was how often you took into account how others around you felt. How selfless you are, it’s an incredible part of you, but it’s not the only thing about you. You’ve never given up, not truly. Even now I still don’t believe you’ve completely lost hope. It’s just on pause because of how overwhelming everything suddenly became.”
You nodded as you processed his words, it made sense.
“But when the time comes and you feel ready to press play again, we can rewind the tapes again and pick up where we left off. The world is moving fast, no doubt, but I like to believe that we move at the same pace as each other.”
Yeonjun’s shoulder was met with a playful nudge as you got shy from his remark, “Hey! I’m telling the truth here, no matter how sappy it is! You’re my Y/N, and don’t you worry, we’ll both be back on track in no time, I think I’m still sixteen hours behind but I’ll catch on, so will you.”
A genuine laugh left your lips, it felt nice. Wherever he was, Choi Yeonjun brought the warmth to your life that was permanent, even when the moon was paired with the chilly air that blew through the sleeping cities. The two of you were awake, the two of you were here, and as you shared a sweet kiss, you knew that it would be enough to go to one lecture tomorrow.
Because as Yeonjun promised, you would go at your own pace.
🌱🌱🌱
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jastheepic · 1 year
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Toxic relationship - Yeonjun version
Warnings: Gaslighting, toxic relationship, and possessiveness etc.
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Clamping your mouth shut with both of your hands as you try to muffle your cries. The banging on your bedroom door comes to a halt for a second as your boyfriend rubs his forehead in exasperation. You don't know how much longer you can try to compose yourself and keep praying that everything is gonna be fine before you actually go insane.
Outside your bedroom door, Yeonjun is trying to keep ahold of himself. His hand, once again, begins twisting the doorknob while banging the door with the other.
"Come out of the fucking room and speak to me, Y/n!" He shouts in frustration as he kicks the door. This time, you can't handle it as you break apart in a fit of sobs. He hears your whimpers as he leans against the door.
"I will break this door down if you don't come out."
How did you reach this point? You were tired of his possessiveness, and how he monitored your every move, if you did something he didn't like, he would lash out at you. Unfortunately, you had always been a sensitive person, and he made it seem like everything was your fault which was why you initiated the breakup.
Yet, as soon as those words escaped your mouth hell broke loose. Yeonjun was furious. How dare you try to leave him?
"You think you can leave me? Over my dead body." He growls before kicking the door so hard that it swings open. He glares at you coldly as you try to hide in the corner, wishing to become a part of the wall.
Yeonjun grabs a fistful of your hair, shoving you to his chest. Your heart thumps rapidly in your chest. You look up to meet his eyes as he speaks, "What should I do with you?" You gulp, feeling a lump in your throat. You were thirsty from all the crying.
He loosens the tight grip he has on your hair and instead pulls you into his embrace. He runs his hand gently through your hair like he wasn't just trying to rip it off your scalp a second ago.
"You are so stupid, baby. No one would keep up with you other than me, only I can take care of you. So, don't try to pull this shit on me ever again. I am not letting you go, ever. You should be glad I am even letting you continue your studies. If you disobey me again, you will never see the light of day again."
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biaswreckingfics · 1 year
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Yeonjun + Angst -here you go 🥴🥴-
(They warned me about you. I should have listened. + You did a wonderful job convincing people that you love me. I almost fell for it.)
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The walk down the hall to Yeonjun's apartment is filled with nerves and reluctance. You know that the odds of finding something that's going to break you inside are exponentially high, but it's better to know the truth than be ignorant, right? At least, that's what you keep telling yourself as you put one foot in front of the other.
The moment your best friend texted you saying she saw your boyfriend taking another girl home, you thought she was insane. Once she sent a picture of the two of them, you allowed yourself a mini breakdown before you pulled yourself together. There'll be time to lose yourself later. Right now, you need the truth, so you march directly to his door.
Already having the key he gave you in hand, you open the door and don't have to look too hard for the treachery. There, in the open view of the doorway, stands Yeonjun and some girl making out. His hands pull her close as her hands thread through his hair. The scoff you make has them pulling away from each other. When Yeonjun spots you, his eyes widen in panic.
Every negative thing you've ever heard about him at the beginning of your relationship comes slamming back to you. Your friends warning you about his reputation and telling you over and over how they think you're making a mistake. His friends making subtle comments about his actions and thoughts. Yet, you still thought you knew better, and after a year together, you thought you were the difference. Everyone thought you got Yeonjun to settle down.
Clearly, you all thought wrong.
"Babe, I can explain," Yeonjun starts.
You arch a brow in response. "That's gonna be one hell of an explanation, isn't it?"
Yeonjun looks at a loss for words. You're unsure if he expected hysterics from you or for you to scream and throw things at him. All you feel is numb, though. He has his reputation for a reason, and you were a fool to ignore it.
"You know… they warned me about you," you tell him, letting your eyes trail down his body and then back up. "I should have listened."
"Babe," he starts toward you with that stupid pet name. "Let me explain."
You put a hand up, gesturing for him to stop coming closer to you. Glancing behind him, you see the girl watching both of you anxiously. Her lipstick is smeared and you let out a soft laugh, not believing that you're in this situation right now.
Your eyes flash back to Yeonjun and you allow him to see the pain you're feeling. The pain and the anger that he wasted an entire year of your life. "You did a wonderful job convincing people that you love me. I almost fell for it."
"I do love you," his voice breaks once he realizes there's no getting out of this.
"Then keep your love, because I certainly don't want it if this is what it feels like."
His gaze begs you to give him a chance. When you send another glance to the girl behind him, he closes his eyes in surrender.
"I made a mistake. A stupid, terrible mistake," he opens his eyes and pierces you with his stare, "but I'll never do it again. I promise you."
Nodding, you respond, "Good. I hope your next girlfriend is treated with the respect that I deserved."
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lovergonebad · 7 months
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Take Care ~ *Choi Yeonjun*
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Summary: Coming home, you see Yeonjun looking like he just walked through hell. Despite your better judgement, you decide to patch him up and let him crash at your place. However, you know he’s not here to stay, which kills you on the inside.
Pairing: Choi Yeonjun X Fem!Reader
Genre: Angst Oneshot
Word Count: 1224
Warning: Some suggestive teasing, mentions of bad wounds and stitching up a stab wound, Yeonjun gets almost full naked towards the end but then he covers up again.
Masterlist
Taglist: @foxwinter​
As soon as you got to your place, you frowned. Sitting on the front steps, soaked to the bone, was the resident bad boy, Choi Yeonjun. You thought you saw the last of him last month when he said he was going to be laying low for a while. Apparently he got into some trouble with some rival gangs and needed to keep a low profile. So what was he doing here at the front of your place, uninvited?
With a frown, you gripped your umbrella tighter before standing in front of here. “Can I help you?”
He looked up at you with a weak smile and your breath caught in your throat. His right eye was so swollen it was completely shut and an ugly shade of gray-purple. Nevertheless, he still gave you his roguish smile. “I was wondering if you could help me.”
Nodding quickly, you fumbled with the lock on your door before pushing it open. You held the door for him as he limped inside before rushing to get a first aid kit and some clean clothes. You had no idea how long he was waiting out there and you didn’t want to risk infection. Not only that but he was sopping wet and needed to get dry before he got sick. Returning from your room, you saw that he was sitting on top of your counter, waiting for you like a good little patient.
“I’m going to dress your wounds and then you’re going to change clothes so you don’t get sick, alright?” You assured him as you assessed the damages you could see, which wasn’t much considering he was wearing long sleeves and long pants with boots.
Yeonjun smirked. “So you want me to strip down to my underwear, huh?”
You could feel your cheeks dust themselves with pink, causing you to suck your cheeks in. “Don’t start with me, mister. At least take off your jacket. I’ll start from the top and work my way down.”
“I like where this is going.” He continued to tease as he shucked off his wet leather jacket.
With a snarl, you dabbed at a cut on his forehead with antiseptic, causing him to wince. “Be serious please. You’re hurt and I need to take care of it because you obviously won’t.”
He rolled his eyes. “I would, it’s just you’re nice when you do it. At least, you usually are.”
“Well, you started it.” You shot back. “You started getting all flirty and whatever.”
“Because you’re cute when you’re flustered.”
It was your turn to roll your eyes as you pressed a butterfly bandage to his forehead. You then took care to wipe all the dried blood off his face before looking at what else needs to be done. You took note that the most prevalent wound on his arms were bruises. A couple cuts here and there that weren’t deep just got cleaned and allowed to air dry. Glancing to check his legs, you noticed a big red spot on his thigh, making you let out a shaky breath.
“You got stabbed?” You mumbled.
He shrugged. “It’s not as bad as it looks.”
As you were about to look him in the eye, you saw him taking his shirt off, revealing his perfectly toned abs and few more bruises. You quickly averted your eyes with a squeak. This caused him to laugh before throwing his shirt behind you.
“What? You need to check on these wounds too. Besides, I got kicked in the stomach repeatedly, and that hurt a lot more than the stab wound.” He explained as he looked down at his bruised stomach. “I might have internal bleeding.”
“Than you should go to the hospital-”
“Oh look I’m better.” Yeonjun gave a weak chuckle. “But, yeah, that stab wound is definitely going to need some attention, please.”
You were mildly impressed that he said please, but you were more focused on one glaring fact: he really was going to have to strip down to his underwear. There was no way you were going to be able to get to that wound in his jeans without them being removed.
Sucking in your breath through your teeth, you muttered, “Alright, you’re going to have to take off your pants.”
“Y/n are you flirting with me?” He teased with a wink. “If I knew this was your idea of foreplay, I’d play hospital patient more often.”
“Would you stop!” Though you tried to sound exasperated, you sounded more tired than anything. It had been a long day and you really didn’t need to be teased by your crush like this. You were hoping that he would never see you again when he told you he needed to lay low, so then your heart wouldn’t ache like this every time you saw him.
You were surprised that he got serious. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bother you.”
Silently, he slipped his pants down to his knees and you found yourself thankful that he didn’t go commando, though you weren’t sure why you thought that in the first place. Turning your attention back to the wound on his leg, you carefully cleaned it. You noticed in your peripheral vision that his hand was squeezing into a fist everytime it stung. Before you could stop yourself, you took his hand to allow him to squeeze it out of comfort. Neither of you said anything as you finished cleaning it.
“It’s going to need stitches.” You mumbled. “I have a needle and some thread that’ll work. Do you need anything to numb the pain?”
Yeonjun shook his head. “I’ll be fine.”
“I’m going to need my hand back.”
“Then can I squeeze your shoulder?” He said it almost too fast, but you understood how painful it was going to be, so you nodded. His hand rested heavily on your shoulder but it didn’t impede your work. Every time the needle pierced the skin, he’d suck in his breath through his teeth and squeeze your shoulder.
When you were done, you cleaned everything up and handed him the clean clothes. “You can change in the bathroom. Also you can take the bed, I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“No, we can share the bed, it’s fine.” He said it with such authority that the argument was done before it even started. Taking the clothes, he slipped into the bathroom and you finished cleaning. You weren’t sure how you were going to survive the night.
Before too long, the two of you were in your bed, as far away as you both could be. Your heart was beating so fast you were afraid it was going to be right out of your chest and fly away. You couldn’t get the thought of half naked Yeonjun out of your head and even if he did look rough around the edges, he still looked immaculate.
You wanted to curl up into a ball and cry out in despair. If only he wasn’t all mixed up in this gang stuff. If only you met before all of this. Maybe then you would have had a chance with him. But you knew as you fell into a fitful sleep that the boy next to you that had your heart wasn’t going to be in your bed in the morning.
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channoticedmeuwu · 11 months
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p : yeonjun × fem!reader | g : fluff, angst if you squint, spiderman!yeonjun | w : suggestive if u want it to be otherwise none? it's like a hurt comfort trope so
a/n : i wanna be savedddddd + hi did u miss me
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you kind of never understood what you signed up for when you tried to give the boy in the corner of your math class a chance. I mean, it was a date. How serious could it possibly get, right?
well, you seriously reconsidered all of that when you saw him climb through the window of your room, drenched in sweat, mouth bruised and lips bleeding.
"fuck! 𝐲𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐧, what the fuck are you doing here?"
and your eyes slowly glazed from his sheepish expression down to the claw-mark-like-tears of his skintight, bright red suit.
"you're fucking spiderman!?"
"I can explain!" he said, walking on the wall and shutting the window from the inside, "I didn't mean for you to find out like this."
you scoffed, hurrying to shut your door so your parents wouldn't hear. "𝐲𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐧," you said, giddy from a rush you didn't know you got from seeing your boyfriend as the spiderman. the same spiderman whose posters you have plastered over the wall above your desk.
"what—what a surprise!"
he looked down and scratched the back of his head. "yeah, I seriously wanted to tell you in a better way."
he began to explain something, but you weren't listening. the way his hair ruffled to cast a shadow below his eyes, the way his teeth shone with his bright, blood-red lips as he smiled, the way fingers drummed on his thigh as he thought of ways to form his sentences. oh shit.
your boyfriend's spiderman.
you ran to get the first aid kit from your closet — that you had for some damn reason. I mean, how often do you have friendly neighborhood spidermen climbing through your window with giant claw-mark-like-wounds in their chest?
so there you were, sitting on his lap as he rested his fingers on your waist, scanning your every reaction to his words as he spoke, absentmindedly, about how he got the biggest cut he's gotten yet; and how he survived it, of course.
and you smacked him, of course. because what would you do, you thought to yourself as you ran your fingers through his hair and made his voice trail off from the sudden touch, if your boyfriend had something happen to him?
but that didn't matter either, you told that part of your mind to shut up as he leaned closer, dragging his surprisingly soft fingers up your back and into your hair, because your boyfriend had nothing happen to him.
he was your friendly neighborhood spiderman, after all.
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txt masterlist
main taglist (hmu to get added!) : @koishua @navyhyuck @allegxdly @daystiny  @kdyism  @neotism  @bluejaem  @radiorenjun  @sleepylixie @oifelixcmerebrou @mrkcore @imdamnconfused  @sicluvz @abhirami20 @tyongishs @emvrd @brxght-world
I’d appreciate if you’d give me a little feedback on the drabble if you read, whether it’s an ask, a reply or in the tags of the rb! Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed!
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ro-written · 8 months
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Don't Wanna Fall In Love pt. 2 - C.Y
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A/N: Listen..I know. It’s been a hot minute lmao. I gotta say, when I first wrote this part, I hated it and literally left it to sit for a while. I finally came back to it and now I don’t mind it! Go figure that lmaoooo, but anywhosies! I’m not gonna promise when the next part will be out, but thank yall for sticking with me thus far. 
Tags/Warnings: gn!reader (I used they/them pronouns at one point), Yeonjun Has Feelings (™), reader slips on wet bricks and busts their ass, nothing crazy happens honestly
Word Count: 3.2k
Playlist:
“Clouds” by BØRNS “Tek It” by Cafuné
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Winter break gave you a month to forget about Choi Yeonjun.
Somewhat.
You attempted to stay busy by visiting some friends and some family. You picked up some extra hours at your job to make a little extra cash for Christmas gifts. You started a new book AND a new series on TV. 
Yet there were moments when your brain would flit back to his face when you closed the door on him. Like now, how you had scanned over this sentence in the book at least 7 times now and all you could think about were his eyes. How they watched you as you shut it. How his lips seemed to frown when you looked away from him, looking like he wanted to say something more. All you could think about was the small exchange between you two.
“I’ll see you later?”
“Yeah, Yeonjun…I’ll definitely see you around.”
You would smack your head lightly when you thought of that moment to try and refocus.
What bothered you the most was the fact that you couldn’t remember the night with him. All you could remember was that you invited him in. Nothing else. You wanted to ask him what he remembered, to see what exactly happened last night. But ultimately, you’d rather steer clear of him. The least amount of contact to keep from drawing any attention.
It annoyed him. All of it.
He couldn’t stop thinking of you. How you looked that night, the sound of your voice, how you smelled. He kept replaying all of it in his head.
Especially the moment you rushed him out of your apartment.
He remembered how panicked your face looked, and it bothered him. He tried looking for you around campus before he went home for the break, but any time he caught a glimpse of you, it seemed as if you were in a hurry to get somewhere else. 
He even found you on social media, something he really only used when he remembered it existed. When he found your account, he immediately followed you so he could message you. But you never followed back, and he didn’t want to seem weird reaching out to you. Bad enough he stalked your handle out without asking you for it.
He wasn’t winning himself any brownie points.
And for the life of him, he couldn’t figure out why he was acting this way. Why he wanted so badly to talk to you about that night. He typically would immediately forget about his temporary companions within a few days. But he supposes you aren’t his typical companion.
Hell, you didn’t even sleep with him, to begin with.
He remembered quite a bit of the night. He walked you back home, you brought him inside to help sober up a bit, and you both sat on the couch talking about various things. Unlike what he was expecting, where most people immediately dragged him to the bedroom, you sat and talked. Both his and your words were messy and jumbled up, a bit slurred from the drinks you had, but you talked with him. 
You listened to him talk about his interest in music, his favorite artists, and his passion for dancing. He spoke about his interest in fashion, and how he loved expressing his identity and personality through his clothes. He talked about his love for his best friends, and how they were the brothers that he never had. You cared about what he had to say, even while tipsy.
Just thinking about it made his face burn a bit, the corners of his lips twitching a bit. He could remember how your tired eyes kept their attention on him, nodding along with what he said. Even as they drooped, you would respond to everything.
“Yeonjun,” Taehyun kicked his foot, bringing him out of his thoughts. Yeonjun’s face looked up from where he was staring at the floor, seeing all four of his best friends’ eyes looking at him. 
“You’ve been spaced out for the past ten minutes,” Hyuka filled in. 
Yeonjun nodded, giving them all an apologetic smile, and scratched the back of his head. “Sorry guys, just been out of it recently.”
“You’ve been out of it since after the end-of-semester party.” Soobin pointed out. Yeonjun raised an eyebrow, not realizing that his restlessness had been so noticeable all this time. “Something happen?” Soobin’s smirk suggested something else underlying his “innocent” question. Yeonjun just rolled his eyes and tried to refocus on the book he had been reading.
They went to Beomgyu’s uncle’s cabin for a few days before school started back up, wanting to get away from the ever-alive city. They had all agreed that they needed some bonding time together (even though they considered themselves brothers) and needed to be disconnected from the rest of the world before school pulled them back into the depths of studying. It was nice to just be near his friends and be himself, not having to be “The Fabulous Five” for a minute. Stupid name.
“Didn’t you leave out with someone?” Beomgyu piped up, tilting his head and causing the black hair he was growing out the fall in his face. “I thought I saw you head out, but I couldn’t see who you left with. Must have done a real number on you.” He snickered, turning to laugh with the others. 
Yeonjun clenched his jaw at his friends’ remarks. Typically he would laugh along with them, even if they were picking on him and his bedroom tendencies. But this time around, with him feeling so conflicted about his emotions towards you, it caused him to just grow agitated.
“I didn’t sleep with anyone that night,” he bluntly remarked back without looking up.
Actually, he hasn’t slept with anyone after that night either. But until they pieced that together, he was not freely offering that information up.
“But you left with someone, didn’t you?” Soobin’s voice piped back up, and Yeonjun rolled his eyes before finally looking at his friends spread around the room. He saw the looks they were all giving him. Ones that told him they were not planning on leaving him alone until he told them the details. He let out an exasperated sigh before setting his book down and marking the page he was on.
“Yes, I left out with someone that night. No, we did not have sex. We simply…talked. And we ended up falling asleep. I left out in the morning. That’s all there is to it.”
Except he knew that he was lying. There was undoubtedly more to it that he wasn’t letting on, given his recent habit of spacing out so much that his friends picked up on.
“Hyung,” Hyuka finally spoke up from his seated position on the floor across the coffee table. “You know you can tell us if something happened. It’s obviously bothering you.” He offered Jjun a sweet smile, one the older knew he would have trouble saying no to. He took yet another sigh, sitting up from his spread position on the couch.
“It’s just…” he slightly trailed off, not knowing what exactly he wanted to say. He hadn’t had feelings like these, whatever these were, in a few years.
“We just talked, you know? It was the first time someone outside of you all actually had an interest in what I had to say rather than just my body. Someone was interested in getting to know me beyond the surface level and…and then I was just pushed out in the morning. I was told it was all a ‘mistake.’ But what’s even worse is that I don’t even know how I feel about this person.”
Yeonjun stared down at where he was picking at his nails, slightly nervous at looking at his friends’ faces. He knows that they all remember the last relationship, and he doesn’t quite want to hear them remind him of it.
“That’s…” Taehyun reached out and put a hand on Yeonjun’s knee, offering some comfort. “It makes sense. Do you know why this other person rushed you out? Have you tried to reach out at all?”
“I have but it just seems like they don’t want anything to do with me. And, I don’t know, I just felt like we had kind of connected that night.” Taehyun looked at Soobin while Yeonjun’s head was still down, giving a look that was hard to decipher.
“If you’re really into them,” Beomgyu piped up. “I say it doesn’t hurt to maybe go to them in person when we get back to campus. See what their deal is. Maybe they don’t know how to approach you.” He shrugged his shoulders and looked at his friend with sympathetic eyes.
“Yeah, 'cause you’re the least approachable out of us,” Hyuka smirked and Beomgyu lightly shoved him, causing Yeonjun to smile, finally relaxing a bit.
Jjun nodded and looked around at his brothers. “I’m definitely going to try.”
First day of the Spring semester…and you completely embarrassed yourself in front of your classroom building. Of course, the rain was pouring heavily as you walked down the sidewalk, making you slide across the bricks. You didn’t have your rain boots anymore after someone (read: Jung Wooyoung) put them in the washer and dryer. So now you were stuck with your sneakers trying to watch where you trekked. It took carefully placed steps and really thinking about your walking for you to almost make it to your class without busting your ass. 
Almost.
Because, just as you were only a few steps from the door, you made the worst mistake of your life, and stepped on the wrong brick. Your foot slipped from under you, and your umbrella went up into the air as you put your hands down to catch yourself from completely bruising your behind. 
“Mother fucker,” you hissed out, placing a hand on your lower back as a shot of pain went through your body.
“Are you okay?” A voice asked from behind you called out over the heavy rain. Awesome.
A firm hand grabs at your bicep, gently helping you up as you slightly limped over to where your umbrella fell, pulling it over your head so you could keep yourself from getting any more drenched.
“Sorry, yeah I’m good, just didn’t–” You turned around to face the person who helped you up, only for the rest of your words to get caught in your throat.
Choi. Yeonjun. Of fucking course.
“Oh, hey.” It was all you could muster in your surprised state, and you were sure your voice gave away your shock. You hadn’t expected to run into him on your first day back, but here you were anyways. In fact, thinking over it, you were surprised to see him on this side of campus. He was a fashion and music double major…so what was he doing at the math building?
“How ha–”
“Sorry, I gotta…gotta get to class.” You interrupted him and gripping your umbrella tightly in your one hand, rushed to the front door to pull it open. You don’t typically consider yourself to be a rude person, not normally interrupting someone in the middle of their sentences and rushing off like that. But every time you had spotted Yeonjun since that night in your apartment, you would hurry off or hide. Simply put, you just didn’t want to deal with those feelings, nor draw any attention that came with interacting with him. And if dodging and ducking him was what you had to do for the rest of your time at the school, then so be it.
You hurriedly found your class, opening the door and finding a seat towards the farthest side of the room away from the door, somewhere in the middle. You took a deep breath, trying to slow your beating heart from everything that had happened in the past 10 minutes. You shifted a bit, thankful that these seats were cloth rather than the colder plastic the other buildings tended to have. It helped considering the backside of your jeans was still very wet and cold. 
Sitting for a second, you took a moment to recollect yourself. All you had to do was make it through this semester, and then it would be summertime. He would forget all about you over the summer with his summer flings, and the rest of your time here would be fine. No dodging or diving. Your only job now was to focus on classes and made sure you finished off the year strong. Not only did you have schoolwork, but you had your friends, family, and job to worry about. As well as the future, of course. That would take your mind off Yeonjun.
Pulling out your laptop and a notebook, you heard the door to the room open up, letting out a loud groan from its age. A small gasp came from behind you, and some murmurs filled the room. Quirking an eyebrow, you looked up from your laptop. 
Your eyes widened, meeting the last person you wanted to see.
Choi. Yeon. Jun.
Every class, you could feel his eyes boring into the back of your head, and it would cause you to lose focus. The first few times you tried to shrug it off. You figured that, eventually, he would have to give up. He would have to get tired of chasing you around. To your dismay, you’d come to find out that Choi Yeonjun was a very persistent man, and as the staring didn’t stop, you ultimately got irritated by it.
A few times you would turn your head around, attempting to not bring too much attention, and try to give him a glare, telling him to knock it off. However, this time, as soon as you turned your head around, he would be the one to look away, a small smirk playing on his lips. It would make you clench your jaw in frustration, but you would have to learn how to block it out.
Another routine that persisted in your shared class was that, after each session, he would quickly pack up and start making his way over to you. And you in turn, seeing him approach you out of the corner of your eye, would pack your things faster and borderline sprint to the door, knowing the last thing you needed now was him talking to you in front of the class.
He couldn’t understand it. He knew now that you were trying to avoid him, seeing you walk quicker every time you noticed him. But he didn’t understand why. You seemed so interested in him that night. You both talked about everything, talked about who you were as people. Who you both hoped to become in the future.
So why were you being so cold now?
“Why are you avoiding me?
“Huh?”
You had been leaving your last class to catch the bus to get to your apartment. However, when a hand grabbed at your arm and dragged you into an empty classroom, you couldn’t help but let out a small yelp of surprise, your other hand coming up ready to stat hitting at whoever it was.
Only, when you saw who it was, you lowered your arm, despite still having half a mind to hit him for scaring you. His question didn’t quite fully register in your brain due to the sizzy nature of everything happening so fast.
His eyes narrowed at you, jaw tensed. “You’re avoiding me. Why?”
You moved so his hand would let go of your bicep, shifting around your bag in order to keep your hands busy. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Yes, you do, (Y/N). You know exactly what I’m talking about. You always run the opposite way when you see me, you respond to everything I say in less than three words, and you’re looking at me right now like I’ve grown two heads. So why are you avoiding me?”
Your eyes rolled and you planted your feet down, standing your ground as you looked him in the eye. “God, Yeonjun, I told you that night was a mis–” 
“I know. You said that, and I know that’s what you think.” His teeth gritted.
“Look all we did was sleep together and that’s it, I don’t understand why I am so different from all your other conquests.”
His brain felt like it just did tripped over itself, and it took him a second to thoroughly process the words you said to him.
“Wh–...So…Wait you’ve been avoiding me because you think we fucked?” His eyebrows shot up in shock and you slowly nodded your head, confused at what he was trying to say. He let out a scoff before a chuckle, turning his head to the door that he had pushed you through.
“God, if I had realized…” he trailed off, and your eyebrows pulled taut at where he was going. He finally leveled with your eyes and let out a deep sigh. “(Y/N), we didn’t have sex that night.”
He may as well have splashed ice-cold water on you with the way you froze. Your eyes went wide at his admission and you felt - and probably looked - like a deer in headlights. Your eyes went unfocused and fuzzy. Your cheeks burned in embarrassment at the fact that you had been dodging him the entire time for something that never actually happened.
“That night,” he continued, looking down at where his hands started to fidget. “We went back to your apartment, and you asked me to come inside so I could sober up. I did think at first that you were about to lead me into your bedroom. I mean, that’s what I’m used to. But you told me to sit on the couch and you went to get us both some water.”
A flash of a blurry memory played in your head, remembering how your head was slightly spinning filling the cups and walking back to the living room.
“And then we just started to talk. That was really all it was. Us talking about…well, everything. We talked about school and then that led to us talking about what we wanted to do in the future and our hobbies–”
“You really like J.Cole.” You interrupted him and watched as his eyes shot up to meet yours. “And…and you want to wear skirts more because you enjoy the feminine look it adds to your style.” 
A smile graced his face, his eyes lighting up at the small details you happened to remember. You wouldn’t admit it aloud, but it made your heart flutter in the tiniest bit. “Exactly.” 
His hand twitched, and he looked as if he was considering something, before he shook his head and continued to play with the skin around his nails.
“It’s just,” he continued as he stared at his hands once more. “I really enjoyed our talk. It felt as if…it felt like someone saw me. And…I don’t know, I was just wondering that, since you know all that now…” He clenched his fists, trying to find his words. Jesus christ, it shouldn’t be this hard. 
Finally, he sputtered out his question. “I was wondering if it would be okay if we hung out a little?”
Once again, your body froze up.
“No.”
And you left the classroom.
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This was written by @/ro-written and is not to be plagiarized, translated, or distributed anywhere else. Copyright Ro-Written 2023.
All comments, reblogs, and likes are always welcome!
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moonlighthoon · 1 year
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Exorcism
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Pairing: Choi Yeonjun x gn! Reader
Song Inspiration: Exorcism- Clairity
Genre: Angst
Warnings: Mentions of death, continuous changing between 2nd pov (you) and 3rd pov (him)
I do not consent to the translation, publication on other platforms, editing, or use of my writing for purposes other than personal reading!!!
The following story is a work of fiction that in no way is meant to represent the idol's actual behavior, and it is written purely for entertainment purposes.
Word Count: 2,061
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New to living alone, you were nervous about having so much space to yourself. At one point, it wasn't just you and your dog, and you missed those days- until strange things started happening around your home.
It started with small, simple things, like the television suddenly turning on by itself. You'd stop whatever you were doing to turn it off, thinking it might've been a short circuit or a bad connection- something of the sort. However, when it kept happening for a few days, you grew confused and slightly scared. It wasn't the fact that the TV would go on and off -no- it was that it would keep switching channels until the movie you used to watch with him over and over again was playing.
For a second, you considered it might've been a ghost, but that didn't last long since you thought it was ridiculous. But then again, it used to be you and your boyfriend who lived here.
See, you had always believed in the supernatural, but people brushed it off, saying you had an active imagination. Except for Yeonjun. He never dismissed any of your thoughts; he'd always supported you on everything. It was one of the many things you loved about him. But now that he was gone, you missed it.
You remember that day so vividly; it felt like you were back at the scene whenever you thought of it. A year ago, you had received a call from the hospital claiming your boyfriend had been in an accident, but by the time you made it to the establishment, it was too late. It took a toll on you, realizing that the person you loved most would no longer be by your side.
At one point after a few days, you started believing that those small things: like the lamp on his bedside table turning on and off, his toothbrush changing places constantly, and your dog barking at Yeonjun's spot on the couch, were signs of his presence.
You thought you were starting to go mad; it just seemed nearly impossible for the ghost of your dead boyfriend to be roaming around your home. However, there seemed to be no other explanation for the occurrences.
You sat on the couch with a warm cup of tea clutched between your hands as you thought. Closing your eyes and trying to feel anything around you, or more specifically, looking for his presence. In your head, you kept begging for a sign, anything that would confirm that he was there, then letting out a wry chuckle when you realized it was ridiculous.
Then the room grew cold upon the sound of your phone ringing. You opened your eyes carefully, placing the mug on the coaster on the table before going to your room to pick up your phone. You didn’t think much of it, not bothering to check the caller ID, but when you heard nothing but static on the other side, you were confused.
Pulling the phone away from your ear to check the ID nearly gave you a heart attack when you saw the name displayed on your screen. You dropped the phone as you let out a gasp, bringing your hands to cover your mouth in shock. This can not be real, you kept telling yourself.
Your breathing was ragged, and your entire body was shaking, but you mustered enough courage to kneel down and pick up your phone.
With shaky hands, you brought it back to your ear and called out his name. There was a strange hum coming from the other end, but no words. You repeated his name a few times as you went to his bedside table to look for his phone. Still no response, but then again, what did you expect from a dead man? What you did find, though, was his phone in the top drawer, and its screen displayed the call you were currently on. By this point, you were already sobbing, but seeing that only confirmed that your boyfriend's spirit was still lingering in your home.
As the days went on, you got used to the new things happening in your house: your dog sitting on the couch in Yeonjun's spot and whimpering, the notes written on the bathroom mirror that were revealed by fog, the coffee maker suddenly starting up a brew of black coffee. Everything would've freaked anyone out, but you had grown used to it. It was like you had gone back to the way things were before- except he wasn't physically there.
Everything was fine, almost perfect- until you decided to go out with some friends. You felt a grip on your arm when you tried leaving your home- as if he was clutching onto you. Looking back to see that nothing was there, you thought maybe you were just jittery because you hadn't left your home in a while. But as you took a few steps, the grip on your arm felt even stronger, not painful, just enough to make you realize that the feeling was prominent.
"Yeonjun, can you please let go?" You whisper, staring down at the floor. You felt a gust of wind next to you, and you saw how the mirror on the wall shook lightly, then it stopped. With a sigh, you walked up to it and let out a breath onto the glass, revealing his message. "Don't go," You read out loud.
"Why not?" You ask, looking in the direction you felt he stood. The mirror shook again, and you waited for it to stop before revealing his words again. "Please," You read, confused. "Is something wrong?" You ask and feel a tug on your arm. He was trying to pull you away from the door.
Deciding to trust him, you close the door, then text your friends to cancel by telling them you felt sick. It was strange really, how you were blindly trusting a spirit that may or may not be your dead boyfriend, but you didn’t care.
You stood in front of the bathroom mirror, holding onto the sink as you started at your reflection, trying to catch even a glimpse of him, but all you could see was yourself. You all dolled up when truly you didn't even want to be.
You hadn't worn anything other than sweats for over a year, and you'd become comfortable in them. Before you met Yeonjun, your wardrobe had been limited only to comfortable clothing items consisting of hoodies and pants. He taught you how to create outfits you felt comfortable in and looked great on you. You expanded your taste in clothing for him. Now, when you wore those clothes, it felt wrong because he wasn't even there anymore.
That same gush of wind was felt, so you leaned towards the mirror thinking he might've left another message for you. "You're beautiful." You teared up as you read it, laughing pitifully at yourself for feeling butterflies at this. Then you kept thinking to yourself that maybe you were just going insane, that he wasn't actually there, and this was just your mind and heart playing games because of how much you missed him. That's when the tears started rolling down your cheeks, mascara staining your skin and making you look messier than you felt.
You flinched when you felt warmth surround you, freezing at the sensation of being held by something- or rather, someone. It was a debate you kept having with yourself.
Is he really here? Is he gone? Maybe I’m crazy? But what if I’m not?
You walked away feeling frustrated by the situation, laying on your bed and cuddling your sleeping dog as quiet whimpers left your lips. It's been over a year, why show up now? Why make me feel like this when I finally started getting over you? With your thoughts racing in your head and choking back sobs, you fell asleep.
Yeonjun watched your figure as you slept. He felt horrible about everything, and more than anything, he wanted to be there with you. But for obvious reasons, he couldn’t. So he laid next to you, stroking your dog’s fur as he observed you until the sun rose and you woke up.
That day you decided you had enough of it all and did everything possible to free yourself of his spirit. It would be painful to let go of him, you knew it, but it had to be done. It was just too much for you.
That being said, you didn’t want to hurt him, so maybe performing an exorcism of sorts wasn’t your best option. You read online that sage helps get rid of spirits at home, luckily, you had some, so you started burning it, walking around the house to spread the smoke. Your eyes were glossed over by the thought of Yeonjun being completely gone now, but this was necessary for you to move on.
And you did. It took a few years, but you finally moved on.
What you weren't aware of, was that the sage hadn't worked, and he was still there. He had simply chosen to not make himself known because he realized how much pain he was causing you. It hurt him too, watching how you took everything that reminded you of him and put it in a box in storage, but he understood your reasons.
After having cleansed your home, you took some time for yourself to make new memories. Your friends were glad that you were finally out of your cave, but -unbeknownst to you- Yeonjun missed you. He witnessed how you held gatherings in your home, looking happy with your friends. He witnessed how one night you brought home a guy; and how after that, he became a recurring visitor. He witnessed how you fell in love with someone else.
Yeonjun felt jealous of course, but what could he do? He was dead while you were alive and trying to move along in life happily, so he couldn’t bring himself to even try to stop what was blooming between you and that guy.
Almost every day, he found himself curled up in a ball, sobbing in a corner because he wanted to stop you, but he knew he shouldn't.
Today was no exception. Yeonjun was on the couch crying his heart out for the nth time while you were preparing to leave this place and start a new life with another. He lifted his head and watched you gather the last of your things.
Thinking this would probably be the last moment he shared with you, he did his very best to gain your attention.
A small potted plant that sat on the window fell over onto the floor, breaking apart and spreading dirt everywhere. You sighed in annoyance and disappointment as you walked up to it, thinking it was strange for it to have fallen when there was barely any wind. Then, there was a strong, sudden draft of air that ran through the place causing goosebumps on your skin. It felt different though -familiar- but you brushed it off assuming it was because of the open window.
You stood up from the ground, going to close the window, and you could’ve sworn you felt someone brush against you. Looking around, you confirmed that you were indeed alone in the room, so you swallowed thickly and pushed away any thoughts that made you hesitate about what you felt.
Feeling frustrated at his failed attempts, Yeonjun rushed to the window and began playing with the curtains frantically. Then, he wrote down the three words he needed to tell you at least one more time.
As you began to walk away, the curtains moving caught your eye, and hesitantly, you went towards the window. It was strange since any source of wind had been blocked out. A thought crossed your mind, but you thought it wasn't possible. But then again, it couldn't hurt to check, right?
You let out a breath against the glass, and a tear rolled down your cheek as you read the message.
Part of you felt happy that he was still there, but the other was now sad and angry that you'd be leaving him. So, with a heavy heart and a half-smile, you wrote your own message below his words.
"I love you too."
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Taglist: @wntrnghts
© moonlighthoon on tumblr, do not plagiarize.
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3raaaachachacha · 2 years
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Choi Yeonjun / 4k words / angst / fluff / smut
Warnings: swearing, degrading names, unprotected sex
Disclaimer: contains 18+ content; minors do not interact
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Warm, summer days were always so much fun. It seemed like every one was happier being together and always in a good mood to be outside . Right now, that feeling was a distant memory to you. It seemed like only rainy days were what came around lately. These types of days were tiring, daunting, and frustrating. This was how you felt when you spoke to Choi Yeonjun. You loved all of Beomgyu’s friend, especially since he was your oldest and closest friend ever since you were little babies, but Yeonjun rubbed you the wrong way.
Even after you introduced yourself to him in a friendly manner, he only gave you the cold shoulder and if he spoke to you, he always had a cocky attitude. At one point, you began to be rude back to him, not wanting to stand or take his rude comments anymore. It wasn’t fair for someone to judge you and belittle you, especially after he didn’t even give you a chance to be his friend. He simply mislabeled you from the beginning and at this point, you were over his poor excuses.
You always did you best to be a friendly, understanding, and kind person, yet whenever you were around Choi Yeonjun, he always ruffled your feathers and brought out your bad side. You did your best to ignore him, avoid him, even defend yourself, yet nothing seemed to work. Yeonjun was destined to be in your life, yet you were unsure as to why the gods were punishing you. You couldn’t put a finger on what specifically made it almost impossible to stand him. Was it his rude and uncalled for remarks? Or was is his cocky aura he radiated, even though he was definitely not better than anyone? Or was it how attractive he was even though his terrible personality overshadowed it? You couldn’t quite put a finger on it no matter how hard you tried.
There was also the slightest possibility that you may or may not have grown to have a crush on Yeonjun from how attractive he was, even though it pained you to admit it to yourself or another. There was something that was so enticing about him that drew you closer every time you saw him, even if you wanted to slap him whenever he spoke. This feeling scared you since you knew Yeonjun was no good, so you did your best to bury those feelings from him by ignoring him and being rude back. You had to make sure these “feelings” were only a phase and to make sure he would never be attracted to you. Yet, that didn’t seem to work very well.
Truth be told, the only reason Yeonjun was mean to you and admitted his cocky aura was due to the panic he experienced when he first met you. The day he met you was the day he found his soulmate, yet he was utterly terrified of it. After being cheated on by the so called “love of his life”, he was never the same with women, especially if he felt his heart race just from seeing them.
Even after two years of being single to rebuild himself and his mentality, he was scared to be with someone again. What if they cheated on him just like his ex? What if it was all a game? What if it was a waste of time? He couldn’t get these negative thoughts out of his head no matter how hard he tried. All he could think of was that nothing good came from loving another or love itself, so his feelings needed to be avoid at all cost. From then on, he wasn’t able to properly show his feelings for those he cared for.
For some reason, instead of staying quiet or avoiding you, Yeonjun’s defense mechanism decided it was best to be rude to you or make it seem like he was too cool to be nice to others. You hated people like this, especially men. In your mind, you thought there was no good reason another human being should act as if they were superior to another. Yet you contradicted yourself once again, falling for a men that thought he was better than everyone else.
“Y/N, don’t be late! You know Gyu will kill you if you are!” Taehyun scolded over the phone as you raced around your room to find your earrings to finish off your outfit for the celebration.
“I’m almost done Tae, I swear! If anything, I’ll be like 2 mintues late. He won’t even notice, it’s Gyu for christ sake,” You chuckled as you put on your earrings before grabbing your purse and running out of the house, “Besides, the bar is literally down the street from my apartment. I technically can’t be late.”
Taehyun sighed over the phone as you swore you could hear him roll his eyes at you, “Okay, see you in a second. I’m at the bar, come join when you get here!”
You hung up the phone as you checked your dress once more, approaching the entrance of the bar. It was Beomgyu’s celebration party after he was admitted into law school. It was one of the hardest majors in your college, yet somehow, Gyu did it. You couldn’t tell if he was lucky or really that smart. You pushed back your curled hair as you entered the luxurious bar to see many of your friends and colleagues. You waved at everyone and greeted a few people, realizing Beomgyu must have rented out the bar for the night, but still, there was a decent amount of people in attendance.
“Y/N! Over here!” Soobin yelled with a smile as you smiled widely to join the boys.
“Hi guys!” You gave them each a hug as you jumped with happiness in your step, “How’s the party going so far?”
Huening Kai handed you a drink as you politely thanked him, “It’s been good so far, but Gyu’s been busy talking with everyone so we haven’t gotten to see him yet.”
You smirked at him, setting your drink down before taking his hand, “Come with me. You should know I have the golden ticket to the front of any line when it comes to Beomgyu.”
You dragged Huening Kai away from the bar as Soobin and Taehyun followed. You manuvered through the crowd of people as you found Beomgyu, only to notice he was talking to the one person you did not want to see. Yet, it was too late to turn around now after Beomgyu noticed you.
“Y/N!” Beomgyu screamed as he pounced on you to hug you in excitement, “I’m so glad you’re here! You look great! Is that a new dress?”
You could tell Gyu had already had a few drinks, but he deserved it after how long he studied and how hard he worked for this all, “Well, yes it is. Thank you for noticing,” You smiled happily, giggling before twirling around to show it off.
“Slutty if you ask me,” Yeonjun scoffed under his breath, giving a blank stare at you before turning away to sip his drink.
Your expression became annoyed instantly as you clenched your teeth to not say something even worst bad. Today wasn’t about you. It was Beomgyu’s day. You took a deep breath as you took your best friend by the arm, “I need a shot, come on buddy!”
Yeonjun’s eyes followed you through the crowd and to the bar as the two of you sat down, talking about whatever before ordering drinks. He wanted to be next to you, holding your hand, having you drag him around, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t be with you. He shook his head slightly as if to knock the thoughts out of his brain, which was near to impossible.
“That was a little harsh, don’t you think man?” Taehyun stood next to Yeonjun, taking a sip of his drink.
“Do you think honesty is harsh?” Yeonjun replied with chuckle, not even realizing what fake persona took over him, yet not being able to stop.
“I don’t think you even know what honesty is,” Taehyun scoffed with a smirk on his face before turning to look at Yeonjun, “Maybe start being honest with yourself before you judge others. I see the way you look at Y/N. You may say you hate her, or say rude things to her to get her to hate you, but you aren’t fooling me. Be honest with yourself,” With that last bit of venom straight to Yeonjun’s heart, Taehyun left to go over to accompany you and Beomgyu.
Yeonjun felt his heart race as he took a seat, running his hands through his hair. He watched you smiling with the other boys, actually enjoying your time, instead of dealing with him. He hadn’t really ever seen you smiling, especially because of him. That was the worst part of all of this. He wanted to make you smile, he wanted to be the reason you smiled, yet here he was, only upsetting you every time he opened his mouth or came near you.
He downed his drink before grabbing his friends drink and downing it as well. If he was going to do this, he needed to be prepared for anything, especially being rejected by you. He took a deep breath before standing up, fixing his dress shirt, and moving towards you like a lion stalking his prey.
You noticed him approaching as you locked eyes with him, for once not upset by his presence, but curious as to what he was doing. His expression looked different than his cocky, unamused one. He looked vulnerable, like he needed to apologize for something.
“Six shots please!” Beomgyu tipsly announced as Yeonjun joined the group, wanting to ask to pull you aside, but getting side tracked by the man of the hour, “I really appreciate having all my friends here with me to celebrate this amazing moment! Even though some of us have our differences, we all came together. I love that. Now let’s fucking get drunk, cheers!” You all clinked your glasses before taking the shot.
You scrunched your nose, hating the taste of the liquor that just entered your body. Yeonjun stood beside you, “Are you okay?”
You were taken by surprise as you gazed at him with wide eyes and a shocked expression, “It just wasn’t my favorite,” You slightly stuttered, hating yourself for even letting him have an affect on you. What was he doing even asking if you were okay anyways? It’s not like he cared about you?
“Next time, if you don’t want to take a shot, I’ll do it for you,” He stated with a grin on his face before taking a sip of his drink.
“You don’t have to do that. I can handle myself,” You scoffed as you turned away with confusion written all over your face.
Yeonjun sighed loudly as he grabbed your arm to turn you towards him only for you to pull away, “Don’t touch me,” You snarled at him with spite in your voice.
“Y/N, I need to talk to you. Come on it’s just a conversation,” He softly said, already feeling awkward since all you ever knew was bad boy Yeonjun, who didn’t care about anyone but himself.
“Why should I even talk to you? All you do is insult and bad mouth me to my face. You don’t even have the common courtesy to do it behind my back,” You chuckled, “You think you can do whatever you want huh? You think I’ll bend over backwards for you just because your attractive? I’m not a slut, even though you think I’m one,” You spat at him before turning on your heels and moving as far away from him as you could.
You made it outside, needing to cool down before you blew up on him and ruined Gyu’s party. You let out a deep sigh before downing your drink and setting the glass on the table.
“Are you done having a temper tantrum?” Yeonjun asked, appearing behind you as you turned back to stare at him.
“What is your deal tonight? Can’t you just leave me alone? You stay on one half of the bar and I’ll stay on the other. Let’s do our best to be cordial for Beomgyu. It’s his night, not about us hating each other, okay?” You gave him a fake smile, doing your best to leave the situation before it was too late, but Yeonjun wasn’t done.
“I can’t do that Y/N,” He stated as he moved to stand in front of you. You gazed up into his eyes, something about them seemed sincere, but you couldn’t fall for it, “Fuck. I don’t even know where to start.”
“Just lay it on me. At this point, you’re gonna be an asshole to me anyways, so give it your all,” You chuckled, wanting to piss him off at this point, but it only hurt him more.
“Would you fucking stop? Stop being mean to me! I know I have no right to say that since I’ve been terrible to you, but would you stop for a fucking second?” His tone raised, taking you back as you went silent to listen, “I’m so sick of this. I’m so sick of always being mean to each other, always insulting one another, and fucking hiding my feelings for you. I’m tired of it! I fucking like you okay? I’ve liked you since the day I met you, but I have trust issues, so for some stupid reason, my head said, ‘yeah lets be an asshole to the girl of my dreams, that’ll get her to like me,’” He groaned in annoyance with himself as he leaned up against the wall.
You were utterly shocked by what you just heard. Yeonjun liked you since the day he met you? What? How could he? How could someone be so mean to another person, yet ultimately have a crush on them this entire time? You mind couldn’t wrap your head around it, yet your heart raced with happiness and excitement unconsciously. That’s when your body did the most unexpected thing, it moved to kiss him.
It took the both of you back for a second before Yeonjun leaned further into the kiss, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you closer to him, while his other hand gently held your face in his palm. The kiss was passionate yet soft, filled with emotions neither of you realized was possible, especially for the other. It felt right, like all the pieces of a puzzle were perfectly fitting together. You wrapped your arms around the nape of his neck, wanting more of him. His scent, his taste was addictive and all you could think about was him. The kiss quickly escalated into one after the other, until you abruptly pulled away and took his hand to drag him away from the bar.
“Where are we going?” Yeonjun asked still in a drunken love struck haze as he more than willingly followed you.
“To my place,” You smirked at him before turning to round the corner and into your apartment complex.
Thankfully, no one was in the lobby and the elevator was on the first floor, allowing the two of you to get in fast and get your hands back on one another. Almost immediately after the door closed, Yeonjun pushed you against the back of the elevator, lips pressed against yours only to move down to your sensitive neck, allowing for soft whimpers to escape. Was this a dream you were having? How did this happen? Why did you not even care about the consequences?
You pushed him off you as the door opened to drag him out and to your apartment. It was a weird sight seeing him smiling at you, especially with such love in his eyes. It was something you definitely were excited to get used to seeing.
You let a small yelp out as giggles followed after, “What are you doing?” As Yeonjun picked you up, throwing you over his shoulder, laughing along with you.
“Direct me towards your bedroom babe,” He asked kindly as the nickname made butterflies erupt in your stomach. You point in the right direction as he smacked your ass playfully before putting you down on your bed.
You moved backward to rest on your pillow as he followed along, “I don’t want to waste anymore time. I’ve done enough of that already,” He whispered against you lips as he reconnected them, only for the two of you to begin pulling at one anothers clothing. The desperation in your touches for one another, only intensifying with each kiss.
In a blind of an eye, the two of you had removed all clothing, now underneath your covers never removing your lips from one another. He massaged your breast in his hand as he focused on you and your needs, yet all you could think about was his cock and how much you wanted it. You gentle wrapped your hand around it, slowly pumping him as he removed his lips from your to let out a desperate groan.
“Fuck, baby, I can’t wait any longer. I’ve wait months to be with you, to kiss you, to show you how much I wanted, no needed you. Now I have you, and I’m not letting go. Are you ready to take me?” He asked hazed with lust and love, not being able to think of anything besides you as his fingers began to play with you soaked entrance.
You whimpered at his gentle touches, needing more, needing him, “Don’t tease me anymore Junnie. You’ve done enough of that, I need you,” You begged, giving him your best puppy dogs as he swore he was about to cum from the sight alone. How could someone be so cute yet so sexy at the same time?
He smirked at you before moving to hover above you, pressing a soft kiss to your head then nose then lips. He ran his hard cock along your dripping core, making you moan out of sensitivity before slowly pushing into you. The two of you let out long moans from the ecstatic feelings of finally becoming one with another. You kept Yeonjun close to you, never wanting his touch to leave you as he paused, waiting to make sure you were comfortable before slowly thrusting into you. The sounds that admitted from you sounded like heaven bells ringing in his ears. He had to do his best to calm himself or else he’d cum here and now just from the sound alone.
“Faster, Junnie, please!” You weakly whimpered out, already sounded so fucked out, even though the night had just begun.
Without another thought, Yeonjun compiled to your request, speeding up and pulling one of your legs higher to get a better angle to pound into you. You could barely form a sentence from how amazing you felt. This is what euphoria felt like. Pure bliss. You let your head fall back onto the pillow as your eyes closed, taking in every thrust and every groan he gave you.
“God, look at you. So fucking beautiful and all for me, huh?” Yeonjun smirked down at you as he lifted your leg higher, now rest on his shoulder as he sped up his thrust into you, “Cat got your tongue baby?” He chuckled as he watched you, squirm around, only being able mumble out incohesive words, “What was that? Use your words, babe.”
He adjusted his angle on you, now hitting exactly where you needed to already feel yourself on the brink of orgasming faster than you ever had before. You screamed out in ecstasy, eyes shut and moans spilling out your mouth. Yeonjun’s groans became more frequent, clearly a sign of his high approaching as well.
“What do you want baby? You want to cum?” He asked, watching you open your eyes to stare into his only to nod in response, “Tell me what you want or I’ll stop,” He teased, smirking at you gripped onto this chest as well as the nape of his neck in desperation.
“No, please!” You loudly moaned out, holding back as much as you could, “Please, let me cum, fuck,” You cried, feeling tears begin to run down your cheeks, “Junnie please.”
He couldn’t deny you, no matter how long he wanted to put up this dominate act. He would always be soft for you, and always treat you right from now on, “Come on babe, be a good girl and cum on my cock,” You pulled him down into a heated embrace, not wanting to be apart from him any longer. 
The more you denied your feelings, the more unneeded hatred flowed through you. After realizing the two of you had only been in pain, the sudden euphoric feel of happiness, love, and excitement flowed through the two of you simultaneously. This was what love was really like. Messy, irritating, frustrating, but also joyful, passionate, and grateful for one another.
You whimpered against his lips as you let the knot inside of you snap, letting your nails unconsciously dig into his chest, only to leave slight marks to admire later on. Yeonjun groaned against your lips, not being able to focus on kissing you from the amount of pleasure he was feeling and the undying need to cum inside of you, yet wanting to still be respectful of you and your boundaries.
“Y/N, fuck, I’m gonna cum. Let me,” He began, but before he could finish you pulled him back into a kiss, wrapping your legs around his waist as he continued his pace. The pace made you oversenstive, but it was worth it to hear Yeonjun’s beautiful moans in your ear as he gave you one last thrust before stilling inside of you. He pumped himself in and out of you a few more times before stopping all together, allowing the two of you to caught your breath after the intense love making.
“Are you okay?” Yeonjun asked, caressing your damp cheek as he watched you nod your head with tired eyes, “Don’t fall asleep on me yet baby. We have to get you cleaned up first,” He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead before carefully pulling out to watch his cum drip out of you and onto your sheets. You could care less about your sheets at the moment, all that matter was how happy you were.
“Yeonjun,” You stopped him in his tracks as he finished putting on his boxers and turned to face you, “Do you really like me?” You asked with a pout on your lips as he chuckled from your cute behavior.
Before answering, he ran to the bathroom to grab a warm cloth to clean you up. He smiled happily to see you in the same spot, patiently waiting for him, “Y/N, I’ve been in love with you since the moment I laid eyes on you. I haven’t been able to get you out of my head ever since, so what do you think?” He sat on the bed to help clean you up before giving you his shirt to wear.
“I mean you never know. You were faking hating me this entire time, you could be fake liking me now,” You teased with a smile on your face as Yeonjun joined you back on the bed, tickling your sides in return for you teasing words.
“Take it back, you know how much I like you!” He chuckled, watching your cute smile widen as you tried your best to move away from his grasp, yet still staying close to him.
“I take it back! You like me and I like you!” You giggled as he pulled you into his bare chest.
He pulled the covers over the two of you, “Let’s get some rest now girlfriend,” He said pressing a kiss to your lips. You smiled to yourself, falling asleep with every passing second. No matter what was said these past few months, no matter what either of you has done, all you could think about was how much love and happiness Yeonjun brought you and how thankful you were to finally be honest with one another and yourself about your feelings. This was a new adventure you knew the both of you were excited and finally ready to embark on.
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- Admin 🦋
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