#clone discourse tw

[luidilovins]

I was just informed that the word "womborn" is actually problematic in the clone community as it has recently been used more heavily in certain Neosphere neurowave spaces. Aparently, it's a huge bioprimary dogwhistle used to argue that the only legally recognized humans are those who come from wombs. Actual members of the clone community prefer the term "viviparous" when it comes to non-clone individuals. What clones refer to themselves as is identity based on a person to person basis, and it's not my place to decide how they define their creation experience even if they all came from the same 6 global factories. I'm sorry for my mistake and I will do better as an ally in the future so please forgive my ignorance because I'm growing.

Also if there's any bioprime scum clowning on this post I will be blocking on sight. I'm not playing around.

[lapetitechatonne]

small rant

listen. i love tim. i’ve been writing a character study about him for over a year.

but if i read one more “aww Tim was just a baby boi 🥺 and everyone was so mean to him when Bruce died” post i’m GOING to scream. in fact i was yelling about it and my girlfriend had to listen to it all so she’s really the victim in all this.

stop👏sacrificing👏THE WHOLE ARCH👏and everyone’s👏characterization👏to👏babygirl-ify👏him👏

[a-lil-perspective]

I know that we mainly see the Bad Batch working together well - with some mild arguments - but what do you think would make them angry, frustrated or have bad feelings between each other? I know Cross is the easiest to point out towards disagreeing/arguing with the others, or at least seeming annoyed.... But what about the others? What do you think would upset Tech and make his normal passive, sweetness become short around his brothers?

And what about Hunter and Wrecker, or do you think the Batch is at a point where they do get along well enough?

Another Anon I must apologize to you might not even remember sending me this ask it’s been so long lol I’m sorry.

I love these questions.

I think they are obviously very seamless but like with any relationship/team, there is bound to be discourse on occasion.

Crosshair is pretty self-explanatory but I do think his disputes among his team is mostly singular and isolated. I think he disagrees with much of Hunter’s leadership - even before the inhibitor chip was an issue. I’ve said before that Crosshair is an excellent judge of character, and I think he sees some nuances to Hunter that maybe we and others necessarily don’t. I think he respects Hunter’s authority but not his decisions - to clarify, I don’t mean his battle-oriented decisions. I mean just about everything outside of that; especially when they are emotionally-involved. And with Hunter, they often are.

I think Tech is pushed to the brink when he feels unseen and unheard. Mostly unheard. A major perk of his enhancement is his ability to assimilate viable information and while it can be overbearing, it does prove relevant at some point in their excursions. I think that when Tech doesn’t feel appreciated, he can go from zero to a hundred real quick. He knows his resources and technical skills are invaluable; as he should. And so it is a silent expectation that he and therefore all of his faculties are to be held in high regard. (Also… if you want to live… never damage any of his equipment…)

Wrecker I feel is most affected by tension and strife. He doesn’t like it. Quickest way to spoil his entire mood. He is not at all a confrontational person believe it or not, and so his emotions are influenced heavily by the emotional turbulence around him. When this happens, I think it makes him feel very lost and irked and when his brothers are being buttheads and shutting him out, he also tends to shut down himself. Siblings feed off of each other, and Wrecker is quite the absorbent fellow.

Hunter gets defensive when he feels his command is in danger of being upended or challenged. For all my love of Hunter, I do think he is subliminally a control freak and maybe even manipulative to get what he wants and find favor. So anytime he feels threatened - which is mostly through his mode of strife with Crosshair - he is quick to lose his cool in this regard.

Obviously there are numerous accounts of which to base their dynamics and discourse off of but these are just the main ones I was thinking. I hope this answered your question.

[rancorsdelight]

I'm new to TCW but...

Do the ones who don't like cloneship/clonecest and yet, devour reader/clone smut or their oc/clone smut, somehow think that makes them better than everyone else?

Because if you think you aren't fetishizing these POC copy and paste men or whatever dog whistle term you are using now, you are my dudes. You are.

Also its a good thing that these self proclaimed "better" TCW fandom milfs don't have people who take them seriously outside fandom (and even there, it seems like they are the ass of the SW fandom joke) because calling people "Incest apologists" is called SLANDER. Because, I don't know how to tell you this kids, but no, no one is okaying incest/apologizing for it/supporting it in the real world. And just because someone writes on their blog claiming that they are -- doesn't mean its true.

Just like the hostile proship ANONS some of these people claim they get. They could be sending it to themselves to get attention. It seems like a lot of them have lost their audience. Weird how when you pollute your good message of Unwhitewash the TBB with falsely accusing disabled people of abilism, calling POCs who disagree with you "internalized colorism?!?" and then supporting artists who CULTURALLY APPROPRIATE MAORI CUSTOMS (they start with an O) and think its okay because someone told them it was okay, you end up on the many block lists floating around TCW fandom.

And that's a YOU problem.

I have surfed around and seen MANY UniBomber style manifestos on these "blogs" with 10 paragraphs of why supposed cloncest/cloneship is, I dunno, fiction that is causing real-life incest? Like, what the fuck? Trying to sound all scholarly, saying that fiction "always influences real life"?

So.. by that logic, all murder authors condone murder? All smut writers condone S&M and dubcon and abusive sex? This is what happens when you try to be a Social Justice Warrior, and use a strawman argument. It doesn't work. I'll assume that most of these people are not even over the age of 25, and have been listening to people tell them everything in black and white. Evangelicals with a gay hat, I guess.

I do not read clone/clone, but I don't consider 3 million guys siblings. Shared DNA only matters for procreation in this context. (and NO I am not saying real life incest doesn't matter because the victim and perpetrator share DNA, I am saying in this context of 3 million xeroxed people, who, and I'll say it slowly, DO NOT EXIST)

I share DNA with people I have never heard of, don't know and never will according to Ancestry. It may be something as small as a single strand from a common ancestor 100-300 years down the line. They are not my family, never will be and anyone arguing that is a lunatic searching for a straw to cling to.

Again, these guys don't exist. Its really fucking sad and scary you guys have to be repeatedly told that.

I challenge these bloggers to go to a Sexual Assault crisis center and tell them that fictional SW character ships are equal to incest victims trauma. Better yet, do something to support those centers, instead of screaming into the void.

Don't like being called out? Tough shit. Reader/Clone is fetishizing. OC/Clone is fetishizing. Spreading slander makes you a piece of shit. No one believes you anyway.

Let people enjoy the fandom how they want.

[nunanuggets]

RANT

So.

I can’t put into words how freaking mad i am. Mad, and very disgusted. Every single day i have to see mutuals, some that have even followed me for a long time, reblog clonec*st shit. I am done. These people even continue to interact with my blog and like and reblog my shit. Every fucking day i discover another mutual that ships these harmful, disgusting pairings. And it pisses me off. I have said it many times and even put it in my bio, if you ship clonec*st, FUCK. OFF. Forreal. If you ship clonecest, literally unfollow me, block me, and never interact with me ever again.

I have been bullied off a server before for being the only one to speak out AGAINST clonec*est, inc*st and p*dophilia. I WAS THE ONE BEING CALLED INSENSITIVE for exposing people that support this shit. I’m done. If you ship these ships, re-evaluate your life choices.

[coruscantguard]

good evening clone wars fandom, my name is "yes I know that most to the Kaminoans we know in canon suck but oh my god guys they are not INHERENTLY EVIL MONSTERS WHO ALL DESERVE TO DIE okay they are an ALIEN SPECIES none of the kaminoans CHOSE to be kaminoans. do they have extremely shitty ethics? yes! are a lot of them guilty of doing truly heinous things? also yes! but that does not mean they should all be MURDERED/DRIVEN OFF THEIR LAND OKAY. IS KAMINO FUCKED UP? YES! BUT MURDERING ALL OF IT'S NATIVE INHABITANTS SO SOMEONE ELSE CAN POPULATE IT IS NOT HOW YOU FIX THAT."

(and don't get me wrong, I am not defending anything that they did re. creation of the GAR! i am simply pointing out that the kaminoans didn't fucking get to choose to be born as kaminoans, and acting like they all deserve to be killed/driven off from their land just because of the actions of those in charge is uh. well. a gross oversimplification of a complicated situation that has... really troubling implications.)

[celebrate-the-clone-wars]

writingcyan

replied to your post

“If you have artwork, writing, and/or graphics/edits that you’ve made...”

If someone has something that would be suitable for your blog, but also has other content which would not be (e.g. problematic ships), would you accept the suitable stuff or would you prefer no interaction at all?

Do you mean if they have some posts that are meet the requirements but the overall blog ships a predominantly problematic ship? 

There are users I do not reblog from entirely because of that. 

I’d hate to put people in a situation where they were to submit and I inexplicably not reblog it so I figure it would be good to just be transparent about this now: we do not reblog r*xsoka or qu*obi. 

Even if the young people in question are aged up for their ships I think it’s still shaky ground to have to even do that so it’s somewhat remotely okay. You cannot change the fact that the people they are paired with knew them since they were teenagers (and/or younger) and that is quite uncomfortable. 

Comparatively, I think I’m only “okay” (and I say this lightly) with ob*kin mostly because they are closer in age and if they are seen in romantic situations, it’s not when ani is still a child. Perhaps I just don’t delve deep enough, but I’ve scratched the surface for the other two previously mentioned ships and...it’s prevalent enough that I have to abstain.

And that’s where I stand on that. 

I’m also going to be updating the Submissions Conditions in a bit, but if people have any questions, feel free to just send an ask as well. I will answer privately!

[lestats-ovaries]

TW: discussions of war and death

at this point I'm sure most people have seen Jennifer Corbett's recent post featuring a gif from the new All Quiet on the Western Front movie:

I haven't really seen any discourse about this on tumblr, but as someone who has A) seen the new All Quiet movie, and B) is very familiar with the book, I want to fill anyone who isn't familiar with them on what is specifically happening in this photo, and what it could mean for The Outpost.

For context, the guy in the photo is Paul, the main character of All Quiet on the Western Front.

To explain some of the current discourse I saw under the original post on twitter, a lot of people think this is referencing the frenchman scene, where Paul mortally wounds a frenchman and then desperately tries to save him, only for said frenchman to die.

But, that's actually not the part of the movie where this screenshot is from.

Right at the end of the movie, Paul's last surviving friend, Katczinsky, gets shot. Paul carries him for miles until they reach a doctor. There, the doctor tells him Kat had died hours earlier, leading Paul to realize he was carrying his dead body that entire time.

After that, Paul quietly lines up to march into battle one last time, now completely alone after watching each of his friends die one by one. And that is where the screenshot is taken.

Now, that's not to say the episode is going to follow Kat's story, or have a frenchman-style crosshair redemption plot, or even resemble any part of the movie. All Quiet is probably the most disturbing movie I've ever seen, and TBB is literally a children's show.

My guess is that the running theme of trying to save someone only for them to die/being completely alone is what the episode is going to center around, which would be tonally in line with The Solitary Clone and just in general Crosshair's arc.

Or yk the photo was just for effect, considering the episode is going to "push Crosshair to his extreme in a heartbreaking way" apparently, we really don't know until wednesday.

Regardless, have fun theorizing!

[hellothere-generalangsty]

Fives - Anchor

Pairing: Fives x reader

Word Count: 1450 words

CW/ TW: Angst; mourning/loss, death, letter, anniversary, pain, brooding, it’s very heavy and sensitive so please proceed with caution and let me know if I didn’t TW something you deemed necessary; also a bit more hopeful/ light toward the end because my heart couldn’t handle that much sadness tonight

Tags: @chaoticvampirejedi @loth-wolffe @m-o-o-n-s-g-o-o-n-s @tacticalsparkles @imalovernotahater @canwestayinthisdream @wakeupjackthisisntfair @namesmox @badbatch-simp24 @lightning-wolffe @maddieskywalker @for-the-love-of-clones @m-e-w-117 @99squad

@ladykatakuri @firelordillyria @andiebell2023

Notes: I guess I missed him a lot tonight… Sorry for the pain

Some elements included in this fic are inspired from chats I had with @m-o-o-n-s-g-o-o-n-s ; thank you little moon for being an inspiration to me 🌙

Iridescent - Linkin Park

.

0000.

Happy anniversary Fives.

Though I don’t see how it could be happy, when you’re everywhere but here. I never grew used to your absence, I never could; not when you’re haunting my every move, haunting this place and this world, finding your way back to me through faint memories and thousand of faces walking up to my office every day, asking me about my day and if I feel well.

I have to look at the ghost of you, every single time, and lie.

“I’m fine. What can I do for you?”

And I hear your voice again, and again. It tells me about the pain running through your back, the nightmares hitting harder than usual, and the fear eating you alive every time you get out of your hard, cold bed.

But it’s not you. It never is. I never could be.

I stopped buying your shampoo. I couldn’t even bring myself to finish the bottle we had in the shower. It’s still there, hidden somewhere in the bathroom, waiting to be emptied and thrown away carelessly, in such a mundane way one could so easily forget about it. But I can’t throw it away; it’s not mundane anymore.

I hid the jewels too, except for the bracelet. I hate to wear it, but I hate even more to put it away. I just feel…I feel naked when I don’t have it, and empty when I do. I can’t help but see you – feel you – through the shades of blue and black. What was once the purest blessing turned into the worst curse, and I can’t break it. I almost did – breaking the bracelet. I almost did.

I could if I really wanted to; but then I would lose you again, and I just…

I gave your aprons to the boys. I couldn’t stand to see them, neatly hanging in the kitchen. They were silly anyway, and I had no use for them. I’m a doctor after all, not a cook.

I published my thesis on the clones’ rights, and it is being presented to the Senate by Senator Amidala as we speak. I told her I wouldn’t be able to be there for her discourse, and she simply hugged me. I wish she hadn’t.

0527.

It’s been a year, yet it feels like yesterday. Everyone moved on; everyone but me, and I can’t help but be mad. I am mad that they forgot so easily about you, that they brushed you off as “another collateral damage”, another…clone. It’s the way they say it when they try to comfort me.

You were more than a clone. More than a soldier, and more than a man.

You were Fives.

You were my anchor, and I was your ocean.

I miss the way you said it. Coming home to me, tired, features drained and eyes darkened by the horrors of your latest campaign; but always soft and caring through the hoarseness of your voice as you whispered it against my skin. You always found a way to be there for me; for everyone, even when you were losing yourself in your own prison.

I am mad at you because of that. Because you couldn’t stand back for once, be egoistic and think of yourself instead of trying to play the hero in the dark. They killed you because you didn’t wait, not even when I asked you – begged you to. I am so angry because I called you an idiot, and all you could answer me was “I love you too, my ocean. My anchor.”

You didn’t even let me say it back.

1134.

I am mad at myself. You trusted me enough to tell me everything, and you knew I would believe you. And when you tried to do something about it, I called you an idiot. I wasn’t even there with you; I should have been there with you. I could have saved you.

Fives…

I remember the first time you came home. At the time, it was still “my place”, but the moment you stepped in it stopped being mine only. I always told you to come by if you needed; and the one time you did, we ended up laughing so hard the neighbour had to knock at the door. But it felt good. I guess that day I gave you a part of myself, and you carried it with you ever since. I suppose it died with you, too.

I know I shouldn’t be so broody; I can almost hear you, your chuckles filling the room, your hands pressing down my shoulders as you tell me “it’s a celebration, smile for me!”; and the smell of that shampoo tickling my nose as you come close to lay a kiss on my cheek…

But now the only thing I can feel are the tears, and that twisting ache in my chest, burning my skin and ripping my lungs apart. I can’t even breathe correctly anymore, I…

1745.

I’m sorry I had you waiting.

I fell asleep on the table, and woke up because of the cold. It’s always cold in here now. I borrowed one of your old sweatshirt - I hope you don’t mind. I kept them. I almost gave them to the boys, along with the aprons; but then I thought they could always come in handy.

They do. When days like today happens; days where I feel too lonely, where I miss you too much and it just feels too cold, I slip into one and hold it so close to me it almost feels like you’re here. My arms become yours, your faint perfume comes back to me fresh and soft, and I sometimes swear I can feel your warmth against my skin. I close my eyes when I do that, and it stops being a dream for a second.

For just a second, you’re back. You never truly left.

And when I open my eyes again; when I realise what it is all about, I still feel you. I see the bracelet, smell the black tissue, watch one of these B movie we used to laugh at and somehow I feel the best and worst I’ve felt in a long time.

I wish you were here. I wish I could tell you how much I missed you and how beautiful you are; if I could hold you tight, one last time... I didn’t even get to hug you one last time. I didn’t know it would be it; else I wouldn’t have let you go.

Echo is supposed to come around today. He told me he would. He didn’t forget about you either, you know. Neither did Rex, or Jesse, or Kix. Your vode didn’t forget about you. They always make sure to keep you alive, tell everyone about you and remember them of who you were.

Echo always says you’re his best friend. He never uses the past tense. I can’t blame him; I still say you’re the love of my life whenever people ask me. I guess we know deep down these things will never change. We don’t want it to change.

Wait, someone knocked.

2226.

When was the last time we laughed like that? For once, we turned the tears into something better; lighter. I’m sure you would be proud of us.

Of course, you would be proud of us.

It almost feels good to see you through Echo; to find glimpses of you in his smile, the faint spark in his eyes when he retells your best pranks, and the way he chuckles...I almost feel at home right now. With you. Not quite, but close enough.

Enough to make me smile, for the first time today.

Echo says hi. He’s watching me writing to you. He asked me to tell you that Rex lit a candle for you this morning, and the boys had a little something for you; but I can’t know what; apparently I “wouldn’t understand anyway”. So I hope – we hope – that you liked it.  We’re probably going to watch a bad movie and mock the poor acting until we fall asleep, and tomorrow we will…We’ll probably think of you again, but hopefully there won’t be as much tears as today.

I guess it’s a battle worth fighting. Not for the Republic or the Greater Good; not for the Senate or the Chancellor. Not for the Jedis or the Galaxy.

No, it’s a battle we fight for you, Fives. Let us be your anchor, for once, and rest easy now, because more than anything or anyone else out there… you deserve it.

2359.

Happy anniversary Fives.

I love you too, my Anchor.

 - Your Ocean.

[bobathirstaccount]

Play With All My Emotions

Boba x fem!reader, smut

Song inspo for this fic is Ecstasy by Dreezy

TW: unprotected sex

**

He held you against the wall, roughly fumbling with your clothing. Your heart beat in your ears; you weren’t used to such casual encounters. But you were so very... fond… of Boba that you couldn’t resist when he had come on to you. And now things were so heated there was no turning back, despite the fact that you were in a pretty public area of the ship. You surprisingly didn’t even mind. The feel of his hands undressing you was more than enough to turn you into an exhibitionist.

The last of your clothing fell away, and Boba’s body pressed you into the wall again. His breath was hot on your throat. You opened your eyes as he kissed your neck. You tilted your head down to kiss him on the mouth. He easily lifted you and urgently kissed you back. You wriggled, spreading your legs and wrapping them around his hips. His erection nudged into your center as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. The skin on skin contact made you moan loudly. He shushed you and covered your mouth with his again. Kissing you passionately, he penetrated you slowly. Inch by inch he slid in, your pussy stretching around his cock. His hand covered your mouth as he started to stroke you. You cooed his name and bit his fingers, making him smile slyly. He flattened you against the wall, his cock moving in and out of you at an agonizing pace. You bucked your hips, “I want you to go faster.”

“So needy, cyar’ika,” Boba murmured, picking up his pace and kissing your throat. His cock started to slam in and out of your pussy, making wet fucking noises. “You like it hard?” He gripped your ass cheeks and fucked up into you ferociously. The sound of his rough voice brought you to the edge. Your pussy started to tighten around him.

“Hng… You do like it hard, I can feel how much you like it, mesh’la.” A soft gloved hand slid up your torso to grab your naked tit. He kissed you hard as your cunt spasmed around his cock. “Ungh, I have to pull out—“

“No no no no,” you squirmed and squeezed your legs around him to keep his hips in place. You felt his cock as he came in you, grunting and trying to express surprise. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, breathing hard. “Why’d you do that?”

You nuzzled your face into the side of his head, kissing him on the temple. “Why’d you come on to me in the first place?” You countered.

He half laughed, still snuggled into your neck. “You’re… vey sexy. I couldn’t take it anymore.” He pulled back, making eye contact with you, “But I’m not. Why are you here with me?” His hands ran up and down your sides.

You blinked, made a bit nervous by his intense gaze. “You’re, I mean, I like you,” you blurted out. His eyes searched yours. Finally he asked simply, “Me?”

You looked down with your eyes, “Yeah.”

A gentle finger brushed over your cheek, “I always thought you and Din… he’s closer to your age, you know.”

You looked back into his eyes, “Huh? So?”

He returned your gaze, but swallowed hard. “You know I’m not getting younger or more attractive.”

You snorted a soft laugh, “Neither am I… no one is.” You slid your hands up his chest. He pulled you to himself, kissing you again. You felt him tense up as he broke the kiss and turned his head. At the same time, he used his cloak to conceal your nakedness. Your eyes followed his gaze and went to the doorway. Bo-Katan stood there, stopped short. She looked completely shocked, but recovered, “You know if you want to fuck that same cock, you can find it attached to a more attractive clone.”

You glowered, “Just because your pussy’s dusty as fuck —“

Boba intervened, “Let’s not continue this… discourse.” His hands gripped you under his cloak. “Bo did you need something?”

“No,“ you could tell she was pissed from your comment, but refrained from returning fire. “I was looking for Din.”

“Well he’s not here,” you said pointedly. Wordlessly, she turned and left. Boba turned to you, wincing, “She will tell everyone. I’m sorry.”

“I’m not,” You snuggled into him. He kissed the top of your head. “Well in that case, neither am I.”

[coruscantguard]

Star Wars: The Clone Wars, episode four of season six in a nutshell

[problematic-faves-appreciation]

You know, I’ve been thinking abt villain/redemption discourse and I want to propose a challenge. I call it the SU Test. How many shows do you know that actually give every single character a chance to heal and be better? And I do mean everyone. No deaths. There needs to be antagonists and/or “problematic” characters. Any piece of media is fine. Anyone is welcome to play. Ready? Go! (Btw really like this blog!)

Hello!

I'm gonna give this challenge a shot! Chose animated shows and movies.

Let's see if everyone got "the Steven Universe treatment," a trope which villain-redemption haters claim is "saturating shows with redemption arcs galore." (Wut? Lol)

In Steven Universe, none of the villains were killed off nor punished through retributive means that prevented the characters from getting a second chance/improving as people.

Will this criteria apply to the shows on my list? Let's find out!

Note: I will only be mentioning villains who were punished (non-restoratively; i.e., not allowed to get better) or killed off. Even one instance of these outcomes disqualifies a story from receiving a Steven Universe star of approval. ⭐

Finally, Marvel and DC cartoons won't appear on the list. Teen Titans (2003) will be the sole exception, however. 

Major spoilers for many shows ahead!

Animation – Shows and Films

• Disney

I don't have to provide examples here. This franchise is the trope namer for the "Disney Villain Death" trope. Lol

Actually, I'll do it anyway!

Most horrific, Disney villain death: Scar

Next! 

❖

• Pixar

Most horrific, Pixar villain death: Syndrome

❖

• Pokemon

The anime and movies generally punish the villains. Some characters even died.

Notable death: Hunter J

❖

• Avatar: the Last Airbender

Notable death: Jet

I know he's anti-heroic, but he committed pretty bad crimes. It seems like the story punished him for that.

If you disagree, there's also Combustion Man's death.

❖

• The Legend of Korra

Notable death(s): Amon and Tarrlock

Fun fact: A good chunk of Korra’s enemies died. 

❖

• Code Lyoko (not counting Evolution; season 4 was the intended conclusion to the show)

Notable death: X.A.N.A.

❖

• Men in Black: The Series

Notable death: Alpha

❖

• Jackie Chan Adventures

Notable punishment: Valmont

Holy crap, villain decay hit this guy hard. His punishment? Miserable poverty.

❖

• Inuyasha

Don't need to list a notable death. All of the villains (barring Sesshomaru and Jaken) were killed off.

❖

• Rick and Morty

Antagonists die brutally in this show. Lol

❖

TW: Sexual assault mention 

• Ed, Edd n Eddy

Notable punishment: Eddy's brother got sexually assaulted by the Kanker Sisters. I know he's the worst, but damn. That is still not okay.

❖

• Adventure Time

Notable death: Lemongrab

❖

• Star Wars: The Clone Wars

Notable death: Savage Oppress

❖

• Star Wars: Rebels 

Notable death: Minister Maketh Tua

❖

• Voltron: Legendary Defender

Notable death: Prince Lotor

❖

• Danny Phantom

Notable punishment: Vlad Masters was exiled from Earth.

❖

• Centaurworld

Notable death: Elktaur

Recent proof that shows are not becoming more like Steven Universe with respect to letting their villains live. 

❖

• Star vs. the Forces of Evil:

Notable death: Toffee

❖

• She-Ra and the Princesses of Power

Notable death: Shadow Weaver

❖

• Gravity Falls

Notable death: Bill Cipher

❖

• Codename: Kids Next Door

Notable punishment: The Delightful Children from Down the Lane

They are KND operatives who were brainwashed into being evil. They genuinely can't cease their villainous ways. As a consequence, they will continue to be punished for actions beyond their control.

❖

• Samurai Jack

Notable deaths: The Daughters of Aku (minus Ashi)

❖

• Teenage Mutant Nina Turtles (2012)

Notable death: Shredder/Oroku Saki

❖

• The Powerpuff Girls

Notable death: Dick Hardly

Notable punishment: The villains get beaten to a pulp by our superhuman heroines on a daily basis.

❖

• Dexter's Laboratory

Notable deaths: Hookocho

❖

• Transformers: Prime

Notable death: Dreadwing

❖

• Teen Titans

Notable death: Terra

I know Terra was probably resurrected, but this doesn’t negate the fact that she underwent a redemption-by-death arc. 

❖

• Scooby Doo: Mystery Incorporated

Notable death: Everyone in Crystal Cove (except Mystery Incorporated) died

Notable punishment: Professor Pericles’ fate. His consciousness died due the evil entity who took over his body.

❖

• The Owl House 

Notable death: The basilisk that attacked Luz’s school

Yeah, this show is not interested in being like Steven Universe. SU would have handled the basilisk’s (a victim of Belos’ experiments) story differently. 

❖

• We Bare Bears 

Notable villain: Agent Trout 

Mentioning him because he’s a villain who lacks redeeming qualities. None of SU’s baddies were given this treatment by the writers. 

Trout was an absolute bastard. 

❖

• Over the Garden Wall 

Notable death: The Beast

❖

• Regular Show

Notable death: Malum Kranus

This show killed off a lot of its villains.

❖

• The Amazing World of Gumball

Notable death: Rob

❖

• Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts

Notable death: Scarlemagne/Hugo Oak

❖

• Coraline

Notable death: The Other Father

❖

• Trollhunters

Notable death: Angor Rot

❖

• Arcane

Notable death: Silco

❖

There are more shows, but I don’t think they'll be receiveng a SU star either. So I’ll stop here, for now.

Think I made my point. c:

[celebrate-the-clone-wars]

Thanks for being mostly non-confrontational about the shipping issues. I'm a Fandom Old & I remember a time when we didn't really have these discussions, people shipped whatever and criticism came in the form of "I don't see the chemistry/X is better than Y" rather than "Y is morally wrong and I won't reblog from people who ship it!!!" And I guess some of the convos are good. But tbh Hayden C and Ewan M are 10 years apart, so as long as it's tcw and they're 30 and 40, what's wrong with that!?

hey sorry, just to tack on to my previous ask (since it wouldn’t fit with the word limit) - I don’t really care about George Lucas’s exact timeline, the thing’s full of contradictions. By bringing up Hayden & Ewan’s ages I just meant that not all fans are the fact-driven wookiepedia-reading type, and they judge based actors. To me, how the fic is written (do they act like they’re on equal footing) is way more important. I don’t like all obiXani fics but I find many perfectly ~*unproblematic*~ 

Don’t get me wrong, I think these conversations are important and I can appreciate people wanting to get ahead of these things that are potentially problematic. I think it’s important for people to state when things are uncomfortable or off– after all, we cannot move forward and be better without knowing what’s wrong first. And no one starts out knowing everything.

It feels that a lot of people start to differ in terms of what we’re allowed to ship or not when it comes to what they do when they create the fanworks. 

Some people like to still keep a firm nod towards the canon and take consideration into what the creators and actors bring to the table as well. On the flip side, some people also want to try and take the characters and move forward from what is canon and completely reinterpret everything.

 And this involves, like you said, completely recreating the everything from the ground up to create equal footing.And both are completely valid. 

Even though it is demoralizing to have the works that you put time into criticized in any capacity, it’s important to recognize what is constructive versus what is aimed to just hurt. 

Honestly, when it comes down to it, I think the most important thing we need to move forward with is how we should be careful as to not prioritize our fanworks over what’s right and wrong in the real world.

[phantom-of-the-keurig]

if you don’t want people asking about it, I completely understand, feel free to ignore this ask but I recently go back on tumblr after like a 2-3 year break and as someone who followed for phantom stuff but stayed for that good good clone content, I have to ask. What happened in the poto fandom that made you leave? I’m so far out of the loop in regards to it nowadays since almost everyone is deactivated now and I’m just curious as to what went down. Love your blog and here’s to hoping Cody gets the spotlight he deserves in the Kenobi series, cheers!

I don’t mind talking about it anon, no worries. I will throw out a quick TW for mentions of mental health and suicidal thoughts.

I don’t think there was any one incident, it was more of a gradual build up that eventually just became so much I no longer cared about the source material anymore and found the community exhausting and toxic.

I think the biggest issue was how small of a community the phantom fandom is, and also, how old it is. Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of awesome, wonderful, extremely kind phantom fans. But unfortunately there is also quite a few long term jaded fans that have been around since Michael Crawford was a mere sperm in his father’s loins and that kind of goes to their head. Plus there were your typical toxic fans that linger in any fandom. With the community being so small, even blocking these people did nothing because they would still end up on your dash. And you had to watch all your mutuals interact with these people and worship the ground they walked on.

Being in the phantom fandom was extremely bad for my mental health overall. I had some really nasty experiences with people, including being essentially doxxed and having what I thought were close friends turn on me and threaten to expose my real name online (I have an extremely unique first name and it would be more than easy to find me if you knew it), and yet I was expected to act as if these things were not happening and keep everything hush hush for the sake of peace. I guess part of that is my fault, because I’m not very smart and am really awful at putting things into words so when I would try to explain things or talk about keeping the community positive I just made things worse. My dumb ass was no match against these part time literary scholars. Or the anons.

I remember once making a post explaining how I had a hard day at work after having a dog bleed out on me after being shot, and that was why I came to tumblr to just relax and escape life and didn’t want to get into debates about fictional characters because I was just here for fun. Someone made a vague post about me after, making fun of me and essentially calling me a big baby. I don’t remember the details, but I remember how much it hurt like that I can remember so clearly. I felt like an idiot.

I was young when I joined the poto fandom, like 17 or 18. I was young and just wanted to fit in. Eventually I felt like an outsider in the community and no longer felt welcomed. Mix that on top of the doxxing and overall craziness of discourse and I went to a really scary place. But I stuck around, because things calmed down and it wasn’t like anyone wanted anything to do with me so I was mostly ignored. I’m 23 now, almost 24, and sometime last year I realized I just don’t give a shit about these people (the toxic, snobby ones) or trying to fit in with them anymore. Like I genuinely don’t give a fuck about discourse, or the meta of a fictional character and what makes this or that problematic about them. Like I don’t have the energy to care.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i dunno if any of that made sense, it’s 7 am and I’m rambling. I guess the TLDR is I stopped caring about stupid stuff and that’s why I now have the attitude of just being in a fandom for fun. If I don’t like something now I either ignore it and let people enjoy what they want or I block and move on. I just try not to engage with serious discourse or meta bs because it just ain’t worth it to me.

[homespork-review]

HOMESPORK ACT 5 ACT 1: Mobius Double Plusungood, Part 3

TW: """funny""" sexual and physical assault of a child by another child, extreme bullying, extreme ableism, a very brief discussion of shipping characters outside their canon sexuality.

CHEL: We get some implications of the part of troll culture we ended on last time when a slightly baffled-looking Nepeta, watching through the viewport, updates her SHIPPING WALL. Instead of hearts, some of the hypothetical pairings she’s painted are marked with diamonds. What this means will be explained shortly.

I can’t help but feel it’s slightly creepy to hypothetically matchmake your own friends, but I’m pretty sure the other trolls know at least that the shipping wall exists if not exactly which ships they’re in, and they do live in a society in which it’s stated later that mating is mandatory, so it would indeed be helpful to have at least emergency-doable matchmaking done well in advance and they might appreciate the help.

I’d like to take a moment to note a ship at the bottom row, left of centre; GA/Tavros. Hussie, on his Formspring, later said that GA was “obviously” a lesbian, or anyway was only interested in women, which doesn’t have a specific term for it in troll culture. It’s actually hard to tell going by what’s shown in canon, because she only displays specific interest in girls except for in a complicated case we’ll discuss later, but trolls are supposed to be bi-normative, plus it’s not like the male selection here is particularly inspiring, so, yeah, the evidence we actually see isn't conclusively "obvious". The fandom, knowing this, systematically harass anyone who even muses vaguely about the possibility of shipping her with a boy, even if they don't know about that Word of God. This is why I’m wondering whether the trolls knew about the shipping wall, because if they did, we can presume GA didn’t care. For the record, I’m sex-repulsed ace and have in fact written about.my own imaginary persona fucking (admittedly fucking an opposite sex clone of herself, it was a complicated injoke) and my reaction to someone else writing it would depend on context and reason, so I can imagine her reacting similarly, but not everyone would. A similar thing with a canonically gay male character explicitly on-screen not caring about hypothetical shipping of himself with girls comes up much later; he’s not a troll, but his upbringing was troll-influenced (long story).

BRIGHT: Harassing people over the ships they make content for always baffles me. It’s not like fanart/fanfic for a ship which contradicts canon has any effect on the canon, and playing around with character dynamics (often in a pornographic manner) is a major part of fanfic.

CHEL: On top of all this, gender and sexuality are really shaky concepts to even try to apply to a species which reproduces hermaphroditically. On this side of the fourth wall it’s obviously because Hussie is a not-very-reflective cisgender heterosexual man, and didn’t think about it any further than “girls wear skirts, right?” Plenty of people fanwank up possibilities for how it could happen on the other side. I think we may have to make a “What The Fuck Is Alternian Biology And Sociology” post or two separate from the sporking at the very end.

Discourse discussion over! Next page, we see some of the relevant terminology used in troll culture, though we still don’t get any explanation of what any of the words actually mean, which is a tad annoying for new readers. The context is a discussion between Karkat and Vriska about getting her into the game.

BRIGHT: Specifically, Karkat wants Vriska to get Tavros into the game, leading to this exchange…

CG: WHY DO YOU EVEN HATE HIM, IT'S FUCKING RIDICULOUS. CG: IF ANYTHING YOU SHOULD PITY HIM. CG: ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU WERE THE ONE WHO PARALYZED HIM. AG: I know. I don't really understand it. AG: It's just a really special kind of h8! It never goes away and it doesn't make a lot of sense. CG: THIS IS KIND OF A WEIRD TIME TO BE CONFIDING IN ME ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS OF BLACK ROMANCE BUT OK. AG: Oh god, what? CG: I MEAN IF YOU'RE REALLY IMPLYING TAVROS IS YOUR KISMESIS I THINK YOU'RE BRAYING UP THE WRONG FROND NUB. CG: BOTH PARTIES HAVE TO HATE EACH OTHER EQUALLY, I MEAN LIKE TRUE HATE. CG: MAYBE YOUR FEELINGS COME SOMEWHAT CLOSE TO FITTING THE BILL BUT I DON'T THINK HE CAN HATE ANYONE, IT'S WEIRD, HE'S KIND OF BROKEN IN THE HEAD.

Finally, our long-awaited introduction to troll romance!

And the introduction is an effective one. We now know that there’s something called ‘black romance’, that it concerns hate, and that one’s black-romantic partner is a ‘kismesis’. The conversation also flows naturally and fits the characters having it, rather than being an awkward as-you-know infodump, although brace yourselves, there’s one of those coming up. Thirteen is about right for kids starting to have romantic feelings and being confused about it, not wanting to talk about it is pretty normal, and Karkat lecturing people at a good opportunity is absolutely in character.

Karkat goes on to lecture Vriska about the emotions involved in different sorts of romantic relationships, and wow, it really says a lot about troll culture…

CG: OK, MOST PEOPLE WHO HAVEN'T HAD THEIR LOBE STEM CAUTERIZED ARE CAPABLE OF FEELING THE TWO PRIMARY EMOTIONS, HATE AND PITY. CG: PITY IS OF COURSE JUST THE TONED DOWN VERSION OF THE CENTRAL EMOTION, HATE. CG: AND ALL THE NUANCES OF PITY MANIFEST AS VARIOUS OTHER KINDS OF FEELINGS LIKE WHATEVER CHEMICAL REACTIONS TRIGGER MATING FONDNESS OR THE MYSTERIOUS FORCES THAT ARE BEHIND MOIRALLEGIANCE.

CHEL: It’s never really clear if this is just Karkat’s idea of it or if this is how trolls actually work biologically. Trolls do use the word “love” later on, so I always interpreted it as “pity” being a euphemistic term because “love” in such a warlike and oppressive culture could be exploited as a weakness. Fandom has played it with their love actually being based on a weird form of sympathy/seeing the other as needing protection, which is also plausible.

FAILURE ARTIST: I have played with the pity thing before but in retrospect Karkat is the only one who seems to see it that way. Maybe this is all his fake deep teenager view of romance.

BRIGHT: Vriska makes a performance of how bored she is, but Karkat’s on a roll.

CG: A WELL BALANCED PERSON IS IS GOING TO HAVE A GOOD DISTRIBUTION BETWEEN HATE AND THE VARIOUS PITY HUMORS. CG: HAVING A GOOD BALANCE KEEPS ALL THE EMOTIONS SHARPER, SEE I THINK THAT'S YOUR PROBLEM. AG: Oh???????? AG: I hope you know I already wore out some good note-taking pens today. All the pens. AG: All of them. CG: SEE, MY HATE IS LIKE A FINELY TUNED INSTRUMENT BECAUSE I'M AWARE OF THESE PRINCIPLES. CG: I COULD HATE A HOLE IN PARADOX SPACE ITSELF, STRAIGHT THROUGH TO A NEW REALITY FRESH FOR THE HATING. AG: Hahahahahahahaha, you don't even know how much I'm laughing at this. CG: BUT SEE, YOU'RE TOO HEAVY ON THE HATE SIDE, OR AT LEAST YOU PRETEND TO BE WHICH IS MAYBE WORSE. AG: You aren't reading anything I say are you? You just want to talk and talk and talk. CG: AND YOU THINK YOU'RE HATING UP EVERYONE HARD WHEN YOU'RE REALLY JUST BURNING OUT THAT ENTIRE EMOTIONAL HEMISPHERE. CG: IT'S LIKE LUKEWARM HATE. PRETENDER'S HATE, WITH NO COUNTERPOINT AT ALL. CG: AS SUCH THERE'S NO REAL SUBSTANCE TO YOUR HATE, IT'S LIKE A CARDBOARD MOVIE PROP. CG: WHICH IS WHY YOUR BRAIN IS BROKEN, KIND OF LIKE TAVROS'S BUT ON THE OPPOSITE HEMISPHERE I GUESS. CG: OR MAYBE YOUR BROKEN BRAIN LED TO THE IMBALANCE IN THE FIRST PLACE, I DON'T KNOW. CG: WHATEVER THE CASE IS, YOU'RE KIND OF EMOTIONALLY SCREWED, SORRY TO SAY. CG: YOUR HATE'S TOO DULL FOR A PROPER KISMESIS, IN MY OPINION. CG: AND I DON'T SEE ANYONE CHOMPING AT THE BIT TO BE YOUR MOIRAIL HONESTLY, UNLESS THERE'S SOMEONE OUT THERE WHO WOULD ACTUALLY BOTHER PITYING YOU. CG: AND LANDING A MATESPRIT? HAHAHAHA! CG: SERIOUSLY, LIKE THAT WOULD EVEN INTEREST YOU. CG: BASICALLY ANY FEATURE OF YOUR EMOTIONAL PROFILE THAT USUALLY MAKES SOMEONE VIABLE IN THE REDROM DEPARTMENT MUST BE TOTALLY FRIED. CG: YOUR BLACKROM POTENTIAL'S PROBABLY TOAST TOO.

Whew.

So now we have ‘kismesis’, ‘moirail’, and ‘matesprit’ as terms for romantic partners, as well as the concepts of black romance, red romance, and ‘moirallegiance’ as the relationship one has with a moirail. Troll romance is not going to get any less confusing for a while.

If Karkat’s grasp of psychology strikes you as amateurish, there’s a reason for that: He gets all his knowledge from romance movies.

AG: Hey asshole, stop watching movies for girls.

I think that’s another strike against the ‘girls are the dangerous ones on Alternia’ argument. Romance movies, per this exchange, are both female-coded and seen as inferior -- Karkat defends his viewing choices by saying they’re INTRIGUING SOCIOLOGICALLY, but Vriska isn’t buying it.

CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 42 WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 33

CHEL: I’m not sure an interest in the workings of romance should be a socially gendered thing in a society where, as it turns out, you have to have an acceptable romantic partner by a certain time or die. You’d think most kids would be trying as hard as they could to learn and put into practice everything they could about it, and you’d also think there’d be better information for them than romcoms.

BRIGHT: Has the mate-or-die part come up yet? I’m not sure when Hussie thought of it.

CHEL: I don’t know if he’d thought of it yet, but it does come up very soon.

BRIGHT: Karkat then moves on to the original reason he contacted Vriska -- he needs her and her mind powers in the game, because he’s just run into a double agent called Jack.

Over on the next panel, Karkat is still talking to Vriska, but he’s glancing back over his shoulder at Jack Noir. His hand is covered in blood, which keeps cycling through a range of colours. The blood, it transpires, is because Jack stabbed him. Karkat is amazingly calm about this.

CG: HE'S COOL, IT'S FINE I DON'T REALLY MIND THE STABBING, IT WAS ALL A MISUNDERSTANDING. CG: WELL OK I'M PRETTY SURE HE MEANT TO STAB ME. CG: BUT I KIND OF THINK THAT'S LIKE CG: THE WAY HE GREETS PEOPLE? AG: This game is so stupid. CG: IN ANY CASE I THINK HE'S PROBABLY ALL STABBED OUT.

This would be ridiculously chill even from someone who isn’t extremely cagey about his blood colour -- and it’s not that Karkat suddenly doesn’t care any more, because as soon as Vriska says she’ll ask Terezi or Jack what colour he’s bleeding, he tells her that he’s out of Terezi’s range, Jack is sworn to secrecy, and Sollux (who’s incommunicado) is the only one who knows how to make Trollian’s viewport feature work. (Given we saw how easy it is to use earlier, I’m surprised Vriska doesn’t try to figure it out herself.)

Over on the next panel, the viewer is now Jack, a few minutes prior to this conversation. Contrary to Karkat’s protestations, Jack stabs him because He's got a pretty sharp tongue and can't seem to keep it sheathed. He is curious when Karkat cares less about the wound and more about Jack seeing his blood colour, which is apparently some freakish mutation. Jack looks at his knife…

CHEL: While it’s not a realistic depiction of the colour, recall that this is the shade of red used in-comic to depict human blood. This reveal probably isn’t a surprise to anyone by now, if you’ve encountered fanart, and honestly it wasn’t a huge mindblowing revelation on my first read before I knew, but I do think it’s a clever little “aha, THAT’S why!” moment. Skilfully done.

It seems he's the only one of his kind with this mutant candy-red blood. An outcast. He thinks he was put on this planet covered in an ocean of his own blood to be taunted. Punished for something. Saddest story you ever heard. Got to do something to shut him up.

BRIGHT: Awww. That’s kind of sweet.

This little interchange gave rise to the ‘Stabdads’ fandom phenomenon, where Spades Slick is envisaged as Karkat’s father-figure. In Homestuck canon, it’s dubious how much affection Slick has for Karkat. He seems more irritated by him than anything else, but that’s about on par for how he treats the rest of the Midnight Crew. On the other hand, it clearly makes a massive impact on Karkat. We’ve seen how important blood colour is on Alternia and how insecure he is about his own; his sudden rush of fellow-feeling towards Jack is understandable, even if it does make him way too forgiving about having been stabbed.

CHEL: Karkat and Jack shake hands, and proceed to be in cahoots. Cahoooooooots. Doodling on the defaced parking ticket from earlier, they draft OPERATION REGISURP.

Your whole team executes the plan along the course of its journey, employing espionage, mind control tactics, political sabotage, vicious interrogations and cold blooded assassinations. Everyone does their part and you begin to learn the true meaning of teamwork, as well as this troll disease called friendship.

Yeah, it actually happening is skipped over with one paragraph, but that’s probably a good thing with all the complexity already going on, and we do hear more details about it. First, we’re reminded of the existence and functions of the Queens’ Rings, the magic rings the queens of Derse and Prospit have which give them traits and powers from whatever the players put in their sprites. The trolls have put their lusii in their sprites, except for Aradia, whose lusus died long ago, so she got in the sprite herself. The Queen could put up with getting bits and pieces from eleven hideous monsters (well, ten hideous monsters and one adowable little fairybull thing oh my gosh it’s cuuuute) tacked onto her, but what she absolutely won’t stand for is the other thing Aradia put in her sprite…

She could not stand bearing the visage of the most loathsome creature known to existence. So vile is its appearance, so contemptible its purpose, all depictions of the creature let alone members of its population are permanently banned from any jurisdiction in the reach of her agents. Those of its kind go by many names, and so does the reviled patron god they herald - THE GREAT DETESTATION, KING PONDSQUATTER, SPEAKER OF THE VAST JOKE, or most commonly, BILIOUS SLICK.

Recall that AR thought of the hieroglyphs in the Frog Temple as “illegal pictography”. We’ll find out later why the Black Queen has such a revulsion for frogs, it’s important. But the important part right now is that she took the ring off. At the time of planning it’s in the ROYAL VAULT.

We briefly see a moment in the future of the Black Queen wrapped in rags, just like the human sessions’ White Queen, wandering the desert as the BANISHED QUASIROYAL, and the caption notes the plan was a success.

However, Doc Scratch appears in the desert in front of her, and it’s noted she was given a new purpose. This, it seems, is the origin of Snowman.

FAILURE ARTIST: I would like if there was some canon Homestuck material expanding on this REGISURP plot.

BRIGHT: Same! It sounds really interesting. One example of Homestuck’s idiosyncratic pacing, I suppose -- we spend pages and pages on trivial alchimeter nonsense, but skip over something more meaty.

CHEL: The Red Team work on that, while the Blue Team battle their own session… or so they think. Yeah, I’m sure you’ve all already figured it out, but the trolls hadn’t just yet. They note that their prototypes are affecting the opposite team’s underlings, and the readers are shown Alternia’s two Frog Temples, one near Aradia’s home and the other near Kanaya’s, each with six pillars outside (one seems to have five, but the sixth is hidden behind the building). Superimposed on each other, the pillars make a full ring of twelve.

The truth was it had always been the same session all along. That your teams were not competing, but cooperating toward a common goal. In the more drawn out form of this adventure's narrative, figuring this out would have been a huge deal. We would have been completely blown away by this stunning revelation. Wow. Same session all along. Really? Huh.

This is what Aradia’s been so mysterious about. She knew. We’re provided with a handy diagram, in case we haven’t been able to keep up.

After watching the phrases MOBIUS DOUBLE and REACH AROUND toggle for a few minutes while in a sort of stupor, you finally snap out of it.

(I just noticed, the Blue Team are the Derse dreamers and the Red Team are the Prospit dreamers. Neat!)

The reader’s attention is drawn instead to the Aquarius and Pisces symbols in the top left, belonging to characters we haven’t met yet, and the narration promises we’ll learn about them soon. Drawing attention again to GA’s Virgo symbol, the narration muses about her.

It will probably be quite some time before you get to be her. It could very well be pages and pages and pages.

Naturally, we jump right back to her.

GA’s intro is long, so we’ll take it piece by piece.

Your name is KANAYA MARYAM.

The Sanskrit name for Virgo is “Kanya”, and it’s also the name of a town in Japan. “Maryam” is the Arabic version of “Mary”, as in Jesus’ mother. It may also be a reference to Marya Zaleska, the title character of the movie “Dracula’s Daughter”.

You are one of the few of your kind who can withstand the BLISTERING ALTERNIAN SUN, and perhaps the only who enjoys the feel of its rays. As such, you are one of the few of your kind who has taken a shining to LANDSCAPING. You have cultivated a lush oasis around your hive, and in particular, you have honed your craft through the art of TOPIARY, sculpting your trees to match the PUFFY ORACLES from your dreams. You have embraced the tool of this trade, which conveniently is the weapon of choice for those who would hunt the HEINOUS BROODS OF THE UNDEAD which crawl from the sand at sunrise to feast on the light and the living.

Couple things established here; trolls are not only nocturnal but actively harmed by their planet’s sun, and undead beings other than ghosts exist. Said traditional weapon for hunting them is a chainsaw, which we can see lying against her bookshelf, a reference to the Evil Dead movies.

It would be convenient if you actually hunted them, but it is of course far too dangerous, every bit as suicidal as attempting to poach the terrible MUSCLEBEASTS who roam at night. So you indulge in your bright fascination with the grim through literature. Just before the sun goes down and you join your flora in rest, you immerse yourself in tales of RAINBOW DRINKERS and SHADOW DROPPERS and FORBIDDEN PASSION.

Rainbow drinkers are, as discussed later on, troll vampires. I don’t think shadow droppers are ever expanded on, but they might be zombies or werebeasts. Troll goths, apparently, are the reverse of human goths, dressing in bright colours and staying up in the daytime, which makes sense for a species who can only safely go out at night.

You are one of the few of your kind with JADE GREEN BLOOD. As such you are one of the few who could be selected and raised by a VIRGIN MOTHER GRUB, an event so rare as to elude documented precedent. She would defend you from desert threats, and though her life would be short, in time you would assure her of progeny.

Recall that the Mother Grub is required for troll reproduction.

You are a SEAMSTRESS or a RAGRIPPER or a TREETRIMMER or a LUMBERJACK, whichever you care to be, and your unique hive is equipped with a great supply of advanced technology to accommodate your interests. The technology and indeed the hive itself were all recovered from the ruins nearby when you were very young. The seed of your hive was deployed on the volcanic rocks beneath the sand with the assistance of your lusus and her remarkable burrowing skills, and you have lived there happily together since. You know the ruins and the hive and everything here that is not sand and rock originated from the world of your dreams. You also know that one day you will visit this world while you are awake. That day is today.

Like Jade, Kanaya has been awake on Prospit for years, and the technology in question is Skaian in origin, so that’s how she knows what’s going on with the game.

Kanaya is prompted to equip her chainsaw, which promptly turns into a lipstick in a Problem Sleuth reference. Like Jade, she has a Wardrobifier, set to randomise, which suddenly turns her black shirt and red skirt into a red leaf-print dress. She takes out the lipstick.

You can choose between your trademark jade or black. Even though a troll's lips are naturally black. But they can always be blacker, and a lady with a true sense of style knows this.

She goes with green, her dress turns into a blue kimono, and she’s messaged by someone with a fuschia Pisces symbol. This person, named cuttlefishCuller, turns out to be rather excitable, greeting her in all caps and following it up with Glub glub glub glub glub!

BRIGHT: This conversation is pretty sweet, with some friendly joking about CC’s quirk (they stick hyphens in front of their capital Es) and mention of their Collapsing And Expanding Bladder Based Aquatic Vascular System. There’s another mention of moirails, with CC saying they’ll have to join the game late to keep an eye on theirs.

It also turns out both CC and Kanaya are having some premonitions of what’s to come! Kanaya is seeing visions in the clouds of Skaia, the same way Jade does, but CC hears whispers from a mysterious ‘she’ who needs her voice keeping down. It’s implied to be CC’s lusus, as both Kanaya and CC are aware their lusii are going to die soon.

Kanaya hopes to be with her lusus as she dies, but looks out of the window to find the Virgin Mother Grub has already passed away, apparently of natural causes.

CHEL: The Mother Grub was seen briefly before; it’s a moth-like creature with a huge fat body the size of a bus, with wings too small to ever lift it, horns the same shape as Kanaya’s, and a skull-like head with big lips. The skull on Terezi’s Doomsday Scale was, we can tell now, a Mother Grub, except quite a lot bigger - presumably a breeding Grub.

BRIGHT: Kanaya changes back into her original outfit, and goes down to live up to her end of the bargain… which entails slicing a hole in her lusus with her chainsaw and pulling out a round object covered in spikes the colour of trolls’ horns, called a Matriorb. Kanaya stores it in her sylladex; she’s using a CHASTITY MODUS, which locks each card away, and the key will serendipitously be discovered when it’s time for the card to be unlocked. These modii are getting more and more esoteric.

Kanaya proceeds to have a conversation with her own moirail, Vriska, which we already read earlier.

You then proceed to have the rest of this conversation we already read, bugging and fussing and meddling through the special and magical union one can only describe as being in moirallegiance with another. At least, you guess that's how you would describe it. Maybe. Troll romance sure is confusing!

Yes, yes it is. (Spoiler: It’s not that confusing once it’s explained.)

Kanaya doesn’t have long to dwell on the conversation, as she’s contacted by caligulasAquarium, someone with a violet Aquarius symbol who she doesn’t seem to think highly of. It rapidly becomes apparent why.

CA: kan make her talk to me do somethin GA: Who CA: your no good connivvin fuckin backstabbin girl crush thats wwho

CHEL: Trolls are supposed to come bi/pan as standard, so why does he need to specify “girl crush”? I wonder if Hussie hadn’t decided that yet when he wrote this part, but I’m not sure.

WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 34

CA’s gender hasn’t been revealed, but let’s not kid ourselves, we know from how he’s talking that he’s a dude. Nice Girls certainly exist but they don’t tend to get portrayed as so whiny in fiction, plus CC comes off as very girly, and that leaves us with six boy and six girl trolls. Balance and opposites and counterparts are a running theme throughout Homestuck. Not that there can’t be nonbinary characters, as some show up in Hiveswap; just that there would most likely have to be an even number of them, split evenly between the groups of players. Fine by me as a nonbinary person with a thing for balance and even numbers of my own.

Also, note that we’ve seen this guy, or at least his hand and foot, before. This is the litter-hater in the bowling shoes.

GA: Overstating Our Relationship Wont Make Me Feel Very Cooperative GA: Its Paler Red Than That Ok CA: pshhhhhh that is a fuckin laugh and you knoww it evveryone does CA: so help me out tell her to talk to me i think she blocked me you got to GA: Why Do I Got To GA: I Dont Got To And Every Time You Take My Help For Granted I Feel Like I Got To A Little Less CA: wwhatEVVER you are so the vvillage twwo wwheel devvice wwhen it comes to auspisticing CA: you cant let a grudge go by you wwont stick your busy stem betwwixt so get wwith the program fussyfangs

BRIGHT: Oh hey, another troll romance term! ‘Auspisticing’ is the last of the lot, don’t worry.

CA: wwho givves a shit wwhy she blocked me or about my fuckin manners come on youvve got a wway wwith her CA: i figure if youre going to auspisticize any twwo brinesuckers wwho sneer at each other a funny wway you might as wwell make it official and be ours right GA: Your Black Solicitation Just Seems Really Indecent

Funny words aside, Hussie does a good job at laying down context for what auspisticism is here; we now know that it involves mediating between two parties who dislike each other and that it’s a form of black romance. Meshing worldbuilding naturally into the dialogue is something Homestuck does really well at times.

Anyway, CA is trying to get in contact with Vriska because he asked her to make something for him and now she’s blowing him off.

GA: What Is It CA: kan stupid wwhat do you think its a fuckin gizmo to bloww up the wworld or somethin CA: ok wwell not that obvviously CA: but somethin thatll kill all land dwwellers wwhat else wwould i be after GA: Can You Just For A Moment Entertain The Thoughts Of One Untouched By Megalomaniacal Derangement And Tell Me Why Id Want To Assist You With That CA: wwell CA: im not goin to vvery wwell kill you am i that wwould be fuckin unconscionable CA: wwhat kind of friend wwould i be

While CA is obviously a douche, there’s something funny about how over-the-top he is about it and how utterly oblivious he is to the idea that Kanaya might have a problem with a device that would kill all landdwellers, although the humour is inversely proportionate to how likely he is to pull it off.

CHEL: Maybe I’m strange, but I think he’s adorable. I get the impression of a small kid trying to puff himself up to adult size.

BRIGHT: There’s also more romance talk, and this next bit is one I find interesting:

CA: you could either play along as our auspistice and do a little mediating like you wwere fuckin hatched to CA: or wwatch she and me devvolvve into fuckin full fledged kismesisses the kind like you dont get once in ten thousand swweeps CA: you knoww thats wwhat it wwould be there wwould be rainboww rivvers runnin through star systems and all nebulizin like liquid firewworks CA: it wwill be beautiful and heartbreaking all at once CA: you should read up on your history instead of poring through that godawwfull sunny rubbish

I’m going to take a step back from Homestuck itself for a moment and talk about kismessitude as it’s portrayed in fandom. People tend to envision it in a variety of ways -- some see it as a BDSM relationship, some as a way of pushing a rival to be better, some as just straight-up hate-sex -- but most depictions show it as something that only affects the two people involved.

Here, though? CA’s talking about kismessitude as something that’s potentially really damn dangerous, to other people besides those involved, and cites history as a backup -- implying it can really be that dangerous, and it’s not just a teenager’s flight of fancy. (Although, that said, CA is clearly using this to try and get Kanaya in a relationship with him, so how sincere he is is questionable.)

CHEL: Later on we do see a little bit of one of the historical cases he might have been citing. We’ll discuss it more then. Also, I do like him saying “sunny” instead of “gloomy”. Makes sense!

Kanaya tells CA none of this matters, and he sneers about the “purity of the bloodline”. That’s an… uncomfortable turn of phrase, especially since he’s speaking to someone not covered by the “purity” standard, but since it applies to aliens and it’s in a society where that’s hammered into its inhabitants it’s not a Problematykks issue. Kanaya tells him it still won’t matter because their race will be wiped out entirely, and his reaction is remarkably understated:

CA: huh CA: wwell ok HURRY UP AND DO NOTHING: 11

CA says he knows Kanaya doesn’t lie except to herself, surprisingly perceptive for one so puffed-up otherwise. CA might be smarter than he’s letting on? He asks if her clouds told her that; that was the reader’s assumption too, but she says no, she has a different source. Uh-oh. We know what the last source of information was, and it cost Vriska an arm and an eye-sevenfold. CA’s own clouds “hide nothin but misfortune and monstrosities”, so we can guess she’s Prospit and he’s Derse. He goes back to nagging her to tell Vriska to talk to him, and when she continues to refuse he poutily steps off.

CA: you dont wwant to be our auspistice cause you dont wwant to get locked into that sort of relation wwith her i can respect that

Kanaya denies this, and CA says everyone knows, including Karkat.

GA: Its Unbelievable GA: Her Patience CA: wwhat CA: wwhoa wwait wwho GA: Never Mind CA: ok wwait did she talk to you today CA: wwhat did she say CA: or glub or wwhatevver

They’re talking about CC, if it wasn’t clear. Kanaya, in a callback to John’s comment to Terezi, facetiously tells him that she talked about Longing To Touch You Indiscretely and That Shes Basically In The Scarlet Throes For You. CA, flustered, picks up that she’s teasing him, and she tells him the truth, that CC’s just concerned as a moirail.

CA: if youre not savvvvy about howw you define yourself to people CA: you can just splash into the moirail zone before you knoww wwhich wways upwward

I’m going to comment on this attitude in a bit more detail when we get a clearer explanation of what moirallegiance actually is. CA leaves her with some arc words.

CA: being a kid and growwing up CA: its hard and nobody understands

Kanaya heads back to her room, planning to emphatically not meddle but help her friends, and consults her source; it’s fortunately not a Doc Scratch-related one at all. It is, in fact, Rose’s long-forgotten GameFAQ, saved on a server floating in the Furthest Ring, to which Prospit’s clouds directed her. I have to show you the panel for a moment though…

I’m sure there was a way we could see the screen without having it facing away from Kanaya who’s supposed to be reading it.

You can only assume this took place a long time ago. This race is likely ancient, preceding yours by millions of sweeps. Maybe billions! You like to try to imagine the adventures of these players. Were they successful in repopulating their race? Did they manage to protect their matriorb and hatch a new mother grub? Could they hold it together, or were they torn apart by the complex social dynamics, the matespritships and moirallegiences and auspisticisms and kismesissitudes that will surely plague your group along the way? You have little doubt they succeeded with flying colors.

Oh dear, dramatic irony. Kanaya fantasises about a troll version of Rose, thinking she must have been the leader of this supposedly long-ago group.

And yet they appear to have been the only of their kind to have risen to the challenge in a session stacked heavily against them.

Huh. So is this just because Kanaya can’t find more information, or are the four kids in fact the only humans who successfully got into the game? Picking four specifically white-coded kids to be the last of the human race due to supposedly their own competence is… not a good choice. And why the hell couldn’t other people succeed? This strikes me as more of the whole theme of “nobody matters except the people we’re focusing on”. A good lampshading of video game tropes, but in a literary story, that’s the opposite message to everything I’ve ever read, and it’s a creepy one.

CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 43 HURRY UP AND DO NOTHING: 12 WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 35

BRIGHT: I thiiiiiiiink it’s at least implied later on that there are other sessions going, it’s just that each session is a closed loop of players so we don’t see the others...although if that’s the case, does that mean Earth’s getting hit with meteors from multiple Skaias?

CHEL: That over with for the moment, we cut to Tavros’ house as you take your place as the PAGE OF BREATH in the LAND OF SAND AND ZEPHYR. Vriska, his server player, gets down to the business of building up his house towards the Gate…

… entirely out of staircases.

AT: i THINK THIS, iS, AT: pROBABLY MEANT TO ANTAGONIZE ME,

Okay, this probably makes me a bad person, but I’m crying with laughter at his expression and that line.

It’s more disability slapstick, but here the point of the joke comes off as being more that Vriska is a jerk and Tavros’ reaction is really understated than any reasonable person being supposed to assume Tavros is wrong for not being able to climb stairs. Emphasis on “comes off as”, unfortunately. I’m still gonna give a Problematykks point, and further experience with Hussie’s attitude to disability has soured the joke somewhat, even in just the next couple of pages.

CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 44

BRIGHT: Vriska tries to get Tavros to crawl up the stairs, first by telling him that he promised not to be boring anymore and then by saying that she’s trying to help him get stronger. She caps off the rant by demanding that he apologise.

AT: oKAY, AT: tHANKS, i GUESS, AT: bUT, AT: sORRY FOR WHAT, AG: For 8eing crippled, you ass! AT: yOU WANT ME TO APOLOGIZE, AT: fOR BEING PARALYZED, AG: Yes. AG: Say you're sorry. AT: i DON'T MEAN TO BE RUDE, oR bORING, AT: bUT THAT'S RIDICULOUS, gIVEN, AT: uH, tHE CIRCUMSTANCES, AG: 8ullshit! AG: It's something called 8asic decency and civility you fudge8looded 8oor. AG: Now get down on your useless wo88ly knees and apologize. AT: nO, i DON'T WANT TO, AG: >::::O

Vriska, what the fuck.

Tavros is really great here. He’s obviously not comfortable fighting with Vriska, and repeatedly tries to redirect her into building him ramps instead of engaging. But, at the same time, he holds his ground and doesn’t let her push him around, and won’t let go of solid hard reality in the face of Vriska trying to emotionally manipulate him.

FAILURE ARTIST: And yet people still call him a wimp.

BRIGHT: Vriska retaliates, because of course she does, by grabbing his wheelchair with her cursor and shaking it about. If Hussie left it at that, everything would be unobjectionable, at least in terms of narrative voice. Instead, well…

Now she's done it. She has awoken the mighty inner fury that is... RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUFIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

CHEL: It just occurred to me to mention that the name Rufio comes from a character in the movie Hook, the leader of the Lost Boys after Peter Pan left, played by Dante Basco. Tavros’ mental image of him is a reference to that character.

FAILURE ARTIST: Dante Basco did read Homestuck, with hilarious results as we will see.

But unfortunately, Rufio is not real. He's imaginary. A fake. Like a made up friend, the way fairies are. You continue to be sad and alone.

BRIGHT: Eurgh.

Let me be clear: Tavros having no further recourse to deal with Vriska’s abuse beyond his visualised self-esteem is a problem for the character, but it’s not necessarily a narrative problem per se. Escapism is a thing. You could get a decent character arc out of Tavros learning better ways to deal with harassment he can’t escape. It is a narrative problem when the narrator mocks it and makes him out to be pathetic for even trying it.

CHEL: I’d consider this to be just Tavros’ own thought process, but, sadly, this kind of narrative sneering at him carries on throughout Tavros’ presence in the comic and the fandom seems to buy into it. Tavros gets a lot of hate for reasons which mostly boil down to him being a male abuse victim; there’s a feeling that he should “try harder” to fight back, despite him being physically disabled and a member of a caste out of sight beneath her on the social ladder and legally permitted to be killed by her on a whim. Might that count as a point for WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM, for Huss and the fandom not taking the social dynamics into account for why Tavros can’t defend himself?

BRIGHT: I don’t know if it’s fair to count against the fandom when we’re reviewing Homestuck proper, but we can definitely count against Hussie!

WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 36

CHEL: It’s also notable that the common fandom interpretation of Tavros is as Hispanic-coded, at least partly due to his Spanish username, and of Vriska as white-coded. That’s probably not helping.

Since Hussie appears to expect us to agree with Vriska that this is funny, I’m adding another to these as well.

ALL THE LUCK: 2 CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 45 IN HATE WITH MY CREATION: 3

BRIGHT: What’s weird about this whole mess is that Hussie doesn’t — yet — try to say that Tavros should be trying to get stronger; his disability is fully acknowledged. I feel like this kind of mockery is usually accompanied by the attitude that disabled people should just get over their disability, but Hussie’s clear that Tavros can’t. Which means he should do...what, exactly?

CHEL: Not have let Vriska disable him in the first place, presumably. Never mind that, you know, she has mind control powers so he didn’t really have a choice in that either. That is, however, an argument Vriska fans actually make. Apparently some of them actually blame him for not flying when she threw him off the cliff, which… well, unpowered flight is a thing that can happen in the comic but he certainly couldn’t do it then.

BRIGHT: ...Apparently I retain the capacity for surprise at how awful people can be. The fuck?

Back in the comic, Tavros fortunately does have one other means of recourse. Back in her hive, Vriska is suddenly prodded in the back with a flying toilet, courtesy of Kanaya.

GA: Just Presenting A Floating Reminder That Tavros Will Need Plenty Of Inclined Surfaces For His Ascent AG: That's silly. I made so many ramps, you wouldn't even 8elieve it. AG: I specifically decided I wanted to 8uild something ugly and 8oring. It is now the land of ramps and yawns. GA: Hes Reported Otherwise AG: That lousy snitch! May8e I should take his computer away so he can't go crying to fussyfangs anymore. GA: Maybe I Should Upend This Load Gaper Over Your Head AG: No, don't! GA: Im Still Learning The Interface GA: It Could Happen Accidentally At Any Moment AG: I'm only trying to help him. ::::( GA: Think Of Another Way To Help

CHEL: Did I mention Kanaya is my zodiac troll? I can only long to reach her heights of awesome. Of course the ability to levitate toilets would kinda help.

BRIGHT: Vriska heads down to her treasure vault and retrieves a pair of ROCKET SHOES. The captchalogue code for these is ‘PSHOOOES’, which amuses me greatly. Vriska sends the code to Tavros, who combines it with the code for his wheelchair to create a flying wheelchair. Now that is a good use of alchemising!

CHEL: Awww!

Tavros flies up to the Gate, and we cut back to him later on, leading an entourage of communed-with imps and ogres to move obstacles and help him solve puzzles. Using his skills well, I see! In another set of ruins the imps load jigsaw pieces of rock into a frog-shaped alcove,

Things, however, don’t continue to go so well, because Hussie hates this poor kid. I do not mean that facetiously. Statements he’s made elsewhere imply he has a hell of a lot of contempt for several of the characters he created, which I don’t understand at all. We’ll go into this after Act 7, but I get the sensation that the characters are merely tools to show off the complexity and meta references, which are the parts he really cares about.

BRIGHT: It’s not unknown for authors to dislike characters they wrote; the great Terry Pratchett reputedly hated his character Rincewind. The key difference is that in Pratchett’s case, the audience couldn’t tell. Hussie, on the other hand, tends to make his disdain pretty obvious, to the detriment of the story.

CHEL: That’s a point. Conan Doyle grew to hate Sherlock Holmes, too. He didn’t, however, set up situations solely to shit on Holmes in his books.

BRIGHT: I think that’s the key. I’ll forgive a multitude of failings as long as the author seems to be treating the characters fairly. That doesn’t mean that good things have to happen to them — plenty of bad things can happen and I’ll enjoy it — it just means that the author has to...respect how the character feels and would behave, I guess.

Of course, respect is Hussie’s antithesis, so.

Also, nothing so far has shown Vriska to be anything other than a (granted, entertaining) bully. I wasn’t around while Homestuck was updating, so I’m not sure when her fandom took off, but it has to be later than this, surely?

CHEL: I don’t know. I wasn’t around till about mid-Act 6.

What was I on about? Oh yes. Tavros is interrupted by Vriska again, who bitches him out for doing things the boring way and seeking the boring lore.

AG: The minds of your consorts are very soft and impressiona8le. AG: As easily manipul8ed as all those imps you've 8een 8ossing around. AG: I have picked apart their tiny little lizard 8rains and seen through all the smoke and mirrors of their riddles. AG: I have gotten to the truth they are guarding. The great 8ig mystery 8ehind this planet. And you know what it is, Tavros? AT: nO, AG: It's 8ullshit! AG: Meaningless, 8oring, fanciful 8ullshit wrapped in flowery poems to keep you guessing. AG: It all leads to one thing anyway, and that's what we should put our attention on. AG: Real gamers cut to the chase. They power through all the nonsense and go for the gold. AG: They cheat, Tavros. AG: It is time you learned to start cheating.

Interesting theory. Tavros thinks befriending his monsters instead of killing them is cheating, and Vriska grudgingly agrees but is annoyed he isn’t killing anything. She claims to have designed a better and more challenging quest for him; he asks after her own quest, and she says she has time because Kanaya’s busy.

AG: Which is just as well 8ecause I was starting to get nannied HARD. WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 37

Strange word choice for a species raised by animals, but okay. Vriska sends Tavros a map to the next Gate, and he sets off in his little rocket chair. Little does he know.

You proceed through what seems to be your second gate, into the LAND OF MAPS AND TREASURE. The THIEF OF LIGHT lies in wait.

In a callback to our last meeting of Breath and Light players, Tavros crashes through Vriska’s wall and is left hanging upside-down in the rocket chair from the large cobwebs across the room, while Vriska sleeps on a pile of broken eight-balls. Doesn’t look comfortable, but trolls rest in worse places later. Vriska wakes, and Tavros falls head-first onto the floor.

Here is where it gets incredibly uncomfortable, and we have to show it in detail to assign points properly and so that there’s no ambiguity about what’s happening, so if you have any sexual assault, ableism, underage, mind control, or victim-blaming triggers you may want to skip this part. No clothing is removed but it’s very unpleasant to read and the attitude toward it is worse. Seriously, this is Taklamakan Zoo levels of bad.

(This heading below’s not part of the comic, I just put it there so you can skip. The sequence ends with the piece of fanart of Kanaya looking at the sideways screen.)

~*THE ASSAULT STARTS HERE*~

Vriska sits up. She’s wearing a very short strappy white Tinkerbell dress with her sign on it, and what look like over-the-knee socks, a commonly fetishised style of clothing. I remind you these characters are supposed to be thirteen years old. The dress is also the same as the one worn by the fairy in the artwork on Tavros’ desktop background. I don’t know if Vriska had seen that or not.

FAILURE ARTIST:

To be fair she’s just in an actually-more-modest version of what Peter Pan’s sidekick/love interest wears and the socks come off as more dorky than sexy.

Oh my! It appears Pupa Pan himself has flown through your window while you were asleep. How exciting! Surely he is here to take you away on the adventure of a lifetime. He is more dreamy and heroic than you ever imagined. But what's this?? It seems the legendary Boy-Skylark has misplaced his shadow. He is looking EVERYWHERE for it, to no avail. He is having a devil of a time, what with being paralyzed from the waist down and all. He clearly needs your help.

CHEL: Vriska is prompted to Help Pupa find shadow, and approaches Tavros with a nasty-looking grin on her face, while he lies on the floor, gritting his teeth in noticeable pain.

Pupa! You truly are a silly goose. Your shadow has been trapped underneath your useless torso the whole time! Honestly, where else would it be you stupid sack of shit?

Charming. Vriska proceeds to kick him in the head, or at least nudge him with her foot, while he lies unresponsive.

Of course, the secret to reuniting with your shadow is to get up and walk around. And play and dance and frolic! Your shadow will surely join in your gaiety. But it appears Pupa has lost the use of his legs. There will be no frolicking in this young man's future. ::::( Unless...

Everyone knows that just a pinch of SPECIAL STARDUST along with a happy thought will allow any boy to get up and walk again. Everyone knows this because it is in the classic tale, PUPA PAN. Young Pupa flies through the window of a fairy girl's respiteblock, falls on the floor, and has trouble getting up like an enormous pansy. The fairy girl then helps him walk again, and in return, he teaches her to fly, even though she probably already knows how to fly. Because she's a fairy. They fly out of her window together, and have magical adventures for many sweeps thereafter. To be honest, you hardly know a damn thing about Pupa Pan. But you do not care.

Pupa remains as pathetic and useless as ever.

FAILURE ARTIST: The story just keeps mocking Tavros for being disabled.

CHEL: Not to mention for being interested in fairies. Because how dare a boy have a gender-nonstandard interest, or a young teenager enjoy whimsical escapism from an increasingly horrible and guaranteed-to-be-short life.

WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 39

I might be projecting because the fandom has made me loathe her, but it honestly comes off like Vriska dressed up like this in the first place less to seduce Tavros and more to make sure she thoroughly ruined his favourite thing to hurt him further, especially if the narration is supposed to be things she’s actually saying to him.

The stardust did nothing! Probably because it is just glittery powder with no magical properties whatsoever and is basically bullshit. Because in case it wasn't clear, magic isn't real, and neither are miracles. OR It could just be that Pupa has failed to have a happy thought! Your duty is clear. You will have to MAKE him have happy thoughts. Vriska: Make Pupa have happy thoughts.

He certainly doesn’t seem to be having happy thoughts now. Notice his expression, what we can see of it, looks terrified, he’s trembling, and let’s recall that he’s paralysed from the waist down. Even if he wasn’t, she’s of a far, far higher caste than him, legally permitted to do whatever she wants to him, including killing him if he tries to resist. It’s kind of gone back and forth on, but higher bloods are a few times stated to be a lot stronger than lower bloods, and if they work like humans, they’re in puberty right now, a time at which human girls tend to get taller and stronger sooner than boys. Again, it’s gone back and forth on, but a common interpretation is that female trolls are stronger than male trolls in general and/or have the social power advantage. Let’s also remember that, even if none of those factors apply, Vriska has mind control powers. There is no point here at which Tavros has the advantage, nothing he can use as leverage on her. She can do whatever the hell she wants, and she does.

BRIGHT: We’ve also been explicitly shown that Vriska has little to no respect for anyone else’s autonomy if she finds it inconvenient, and that Tavros is her favourite punching bag, and that his ability to stand up for himself when she gets going is extremely limited.

CHEL: Despite the odds stacked against him, Tavros struggles against the kiss forced on him, and when Vriska pushes him back, doesn’t respond with anything but a look of horror, though she appears to expect him to, as a flickering heart-spade with a question mark over it appears between them. I’m not sure whether that’s supposed to be the thought process of him or her or both.

Vriska hurls him onto the floor with some force...

… and activates her mind control, causing little hearts to light up in Tavros’ eyes.

BRIGHT: Vriska has used her mind-control powers on Tavros before, and when it happened she walked him off a cliff. There is basically no way that her doing it again isn’t going to be a traumatic experience for him, above and beyond the inherent horror of losing control over one’s body.

I’m inclined to think that forcibly altering his emotions is worse, though. Being paralysed was bad enough, but Tavros knows what happened and he knows how he feels about it. Making him fall in love with her is just…on one level, it’s a horrible assault on his autonomy as a person, and on another level, it’s tailor-made to make him doubt himself and believe the encounter was something he wanted.

FAILURE ARTIST: I hadn’t thought that he might now consider the encounter as consensual, which would explain his later reaction.

CHEL: Tavros paws at her legs, making kissy faces, and she looks vaguely concerned. Note the background still depicts wavy blue rays coming off her, showing her power is still active.

Looking defeated, she drops the control and dumps him on the floor again.

I’m not sure what she’s supposed to be thinking in this last panel. Is she feeling guilty? Is she disappointed that he didn’t like her under his own power? Has she just decided he’s too useless to be worth the effort? Any could be true.

BRIGHT: I read that as disappointment that even when he ‘liked’ her, he didn’t act the way she wanted. (And the way Tavros acted is kind of disturbing. ‘Mindlessly pawing at someone’ is not what I’d expect from him if he was legitimately attracted to someone.)

FAILURE ARTIST: The common interpretation these days was she was realizing she wasn’t into boys which okay that’s good for her but she should feel more bad about molesting him.

CHEL: That also makes no sense, because she shows interest in multiple boys later.

I’m also not entirely sure if Vriska had the intention of actually raping Tavros here (in the standard way, I mean, as one could argue that mind control is a form of rape), or just making out with him. The fact that she dressed up in vaguely fetishy clothing isn’t making it look good, though. Yes, she’s very young, but traumatised kids in particular have been known to lash out sexually like that. It’s a way of reasserting personal power, and I imagine it would be more prevalent in a society with no sapient adult supervision. While there are mitigating circumstances involved in their social situation and Vriska not really having ever had a chance to learn better, that doesn’t make this not a horrible thing to do, or not traumatising for Tavros.

BRIGHT: The clothing could potentially be down to Vriska wanting to look ‘adult’ without fully understanding why it looks adult. That does come up sometimes with teens — they want to experiment with clothing because that’s how adults dress, not because they want to look sexy, or they might dress a certain way for dates because that’s the social model they have for How Dates Work.

And if I read it like that, this basically looks like Vriska having the date equivalent of a dolls’ tea party. Which says volumes about how she views Tavros’s autonomy.

CHEL: Good point. Though honestly it would say volumes about same either way!

BRIGHT: I said earlier that Vriska is better than Equius at recognising when other people’s desires conflict with hers, and she is, but that doesn’t mean she respects those differences. She just recognises that they’re there, and overrides them. This is a prime example of Vriska viewing Tavros as something between a chew-toy and a prop. First she kicks him around and terrifies him, then she expects him to be able to get over those emotions at the drop of a hat and respond to her advances — and, moreover, she wants him to respond in a certain way, which Tavros has zero way of knowing. This is the first time she’s shown that sort of interest in him, unless her earlier behaviour was the Alternian equivalent of pigtail-pulling.

...I think maybe that was in fact Alternian pigtail-pulling. Or at least Vriska’s version of pigtail-pulling.

CHEL: That’ll actually make more sense, once we explain what the spade symbol means.

Okay, how many counts does this cover?

ALL THE LUCK: 12 ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?: 31 CALL CPA PLEASE: 26 CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 55 IN HATE WITH MY CREATION: 13

It also occurred to me during this sequence to think again about how Karkat contemptuously swears at and hangs up the phone on the injured Tavros. This, at first glance, seems to be very much at odds with the “cranky but caring” impression we’re supposed to have of Karkat… but it fits precisely with Hussie’s opinion of Tavros and how pathetic he is for allowing a much more powerful person to permanently disable him. I know at the moment it looks like I’m not separating the character from the author, but it’ll become clear as we go that that is what he thinks.

IN HATE WITH MY CREATION: 14

Why didn’t we start a FUCK YOU, HUSSIE count?

BRIGHT: It would have ended up longer than all the other counts combined.

CHEL: The actual assault is over now, but there’s one more picture of it. The ramifications must continue to be discussed, so tread cautiously. The actual act is over now, though.

Said ramifications come pretty quickly. Kanaya, having dealt with getting herself into the game and prototyped her own lususprite, decides to check on Vriska.

Ideally she has not gotten herself into too much trouble. And ideally the dramatic irony has not gotten so thick you could draw a dotted line on it with a tube of lipstick and cut it in half with a chainsaw.

Of course, she sees the exact moment Vriska kisses Tavros.

(Fanart source has now been deleted, sadly.)

~*THE ASSAULT ENDS HERE*~

Humorous art aside over, let’s watch Kanaya’s reaction in more detail. She angrily looks at a copy of the Tinkerbell dress, which she presumably sent the alchemiter code for rather than the actual item to Vriska, hence why she still has it.

So THAT'S why she had you make this dress for her??? And you just went along with it like a sucker. Argh, you are such an IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Like Karkat, Kanaya is presented as the caring one, the protective one. The “mom friend” of the group. And yet, she looks at this, in which Tavros is clearly frightened and struggling, and her reaction is to be mad that Vriska didn’t want to wear the dress for a date with her. I’m not sure whether this says more about Hussie’s opinion of Tavros or the social system of Alternia or both, but it certainly says a lot.

CLOCKWORK PROBLEMATYKKS: 56 HURRY UP AND DO NOTHING: 13 IN HATE WITH MY CREATION: 15

BRIGHT: Kanaya has had to corral Vriska on Tavros’s behalf already! Possibly more than once! She has all the information to realise that this is abusive, even leaving aside Tavros’s reaction! Sure, teens can be self-centred, but even so this is egregious.

CHEL: Kanaya’s Grubsprite comforts her and she throws the dress out the window.

Being a kid and growing up. It's hard and nobody understands.

Yes, I’m sure Tavros thinks so too.

Charles: "I know Sir can be prickly, but you have to understand he had a very terrible childhood."

Klaus: "I understand. I'm having a very terrible childhood right now."

-A Series of Unfortunate Events

[cirrusea]

✨🩵 About me 🩵✨

• Call me Cirrus :]

• In my early twenties

• she/her & they/them pronouns, I'm queer but don't feel the need for specific labels atm

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I have mostly drawn DSMP fanart but I'm starting to branch out now, primarily with Trollhunters, The Clone Wars, and my OCs. Art is tagged "my art." Also I pretty much only use the mobile version of this hellsite so if anything looks funky... oh well

I'm also on Instagram and Bluesky with the same username

I do not support nor will I draw the characters of dteam and cc wil/bur, if you still support them don't follow me. TERFs fuck off, etc

It's generally discourse-free and sfw here. I tag potentially triggering things as "tw thing", for example, "tw blood". Please let me know if you want me to tag anything or if I missed something.

I also like Hollow Knight, Undertale, Sky:COTL, WTNV, The Owl House, The Bad Batch, ATLA, Deltarune.... a lotta stuff I might make fanart of now and then. Enjoy :]

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