#connor brashier imagine

[connordavidscamera]

The (Not So) Good Ol’ Days | Connor Brashier

A/n: This chapter has literally been ready since March and I keep forgetting to post it when I come on here, but anyway, here it is after a very long wait. So sorry about that.

Summary: After Connor’s ex shows up randomly, y/n starts having doubts about her relationship with Connor, but they boys are there to reassure her.

Warnings: angst, obviously. It’s not me if it’s not angsty

Word count: 6.8k

***

I think I’ve stopped breathing. Because I’m standing here watching the only man I’ve ever loved stand in front of the only other girl in the world that has had him the same way I have. I’m suddenly back in high school, watching from the sidelines as Connor loves and cares for another girl in a way I had only wished he would love and care for me. 

The first couple of weeks were hard. It was difficult to figure out what I could and couldn’t do anymore now that Connor had a girlfriend. A girlfriend who isn’t me. Things between Connor and I didn’t fully change immediately. It was gradual, and to anyone else it probably wasn’t even noticeable, but for me it was. It started with a side hug when he slid into the seat next to me. Then a nudge, then nothing but a “hey.” Then it became a thing where he had me scoot over so McKenzie could sit with us. Then they started to get to our seat before me, causing me to have to sit in front of them.

I’d sit there and have to watch them hold hands over the table, and kiss. I’d have to watch him move her hair out of her face, and her play with the tufts of hair on the back of his neck. I’d watch her laugh at everything he said, and him hold onto every word she said. It was torture, but I was learning to live with it. That is until she approached me one day before class.

It was very much a coming of age, teen rom-com movie moment. I was in the bathroom, washing my hands when she came in. I forced a smile, same as I always did when I saw her. She did the same. 

“Y/n, just the person I wanted to see. I was hoping you’d be here.”

“McKenzie,” I nod. “What can I do for you?”

She looks into the mirror, adjusting her ponytail so it sits higher on the top of her head. “Well, I’m glad you asked. I want you to stop hanging out with Connor.”

“Excuse me?” I turn off the water, facing her, but reaching for a paper towel. 

“I want you to stop hanging out with him. I don’t know what your relationship is or was before I came along, but I don’t like it. I don’t like how close you two are.”

“Um, he’s my best friend.”

“Mhm, and I know you like him.”

“Uh, McKenzie, I don’t know where you heard that, but-”

“Oh, it’s obvious, don’t play dumb. Everyone knows you have a thing for him, except for him and it’s going to stay that way because I’m his girlfriend now, not you. So that hanging out alone that you used to do, isn’t gonna happen anymore. If all four of you are together, expect me there too. And don’t even think about sitting next to Connor when you do go out together.”

“Does Connor know that you’re in here telling me this? Because I don’t think he’d be okay with it.”

She rolls her eyes, “Oh, I’ll be telling him the same thing. Don’t worry about that.”

I toss the paper towels in the trash and look at her, my arms folded over my chest. “I’m sorry, and what are you getting out of this? Like what is your end result?”

“To have you out of the picture,” she says matter-of-factly.

“Okay, but… he and I have the same friends. And we have for years. I highly doubt that he’s gonna let some girl that he’s only been dating  for three weeks come in here and disrupt his life like that.”

“Connor does whatever I want him to do. And if I tell him that I don’t want you around, he’s going to make it happen.”

“But-”

“Look, I don’t have time to explain this more. Just stay away from Connor, okay? That’s it.”

I don’t respond, but she takes that as one. 

“Okay, perfect. Well, I’ll see you in class. I’m so glad we were able to have this talk.”

I watch her leave the bathroom, but I don’t leave. I lean back against the bathroom sink and take in everything she just said. Surely Connor wouldn’t go for this. I mean, we’ve been friends forever. He wouldn’t just cast me to the side because he has a girlfriend. 

But… isn’t that what he’s doing now? Pushing me to the side to make room for her.

“What are you doing here?” Connor asks. “Last I heard, you’d moved to Arizona.”

McKenzie nods, smiling that same perfectly straight, shimmering smile that she always did in high school. It’s crazy how some things never change. Like the look she’s giving him - I don’t know how a look can convey possession, but hers does. Hers says that she still has him. That he’s still her “Connor Bug” despite them having broken up over three years ago. 

“Yeah, I did. I’m going to school there, but my friend, Cammy - you remember Cammy, right? She goes to school here, so I thought I’d come visit for a little while. I didn’t realize you go here, too.” She looks over to where Shawn and Brian are - which just happens to be who I’m currently hiding behind. 

“Shawn, Brian! It’s so good to see you guys again!”

They both nod in acknowledgement. “Hey,” they say.

Brian reaches behind him and finds my hand, squeezing it reassuringly, telling me just what I need to hear - they’ve got me. They always do.

Friday nights look a little different now. For the past three weeks, I have opted out of my usual Friday night plans with the boys. It’s been pretty much the same since middle school. We go to the diner down the street from the school (they have the best milkshakes in the state, you can’t convince me otherwise), and then we either go watch a really bad movie - or rent one  - or we go to the park and we play on the playground until it gets dark. After that we grab pizza or chinese food and head to whoever’s house we feel like crashing at that night. Our parents are well versed in our plans, so it was no surprise that mine questioned me when I said I wasn’t going that first week. 

Shawn and Brian did too, but all I had to say was that I was having really bad period cramps and they were done with the conversation. Connor didn’t even ask why I didn’t go - I actually doubt he noticed with how intune he is with McKenzie. (And by intune I mean they’re practically swallowing each other anytime I’m around, so if they even came up long enough for air, I know he didn’t notice.)

The second week, Shawn and Brian gave me a sympathetic look. I think Shawn was starting to understand why I wasn’t going at that point, given the fact that I had also started opting out of eating lunch with them. I told them that I was tutoring, but really I was sitting in the far corner of the library, reading, hoping they wouldn’t come looking for me. Thankfully they didn’t. At least not during the day.

I’m sitting in my room, curled under my blankets, just hoping that sleep will take over so that I don’t have to address for the third time this month why I'm not going out with the guys today. However, about forty minutes into cowering under the blankets, my bedroom door opens. The lack of knocking tells me exactly who it is.

“Alright, sit up. We’re watching movies.”

“What?” I peek out from under the covers to see Shawn and Brian sitting on the edge of my bed. They have pizza and movies in their hands, as well as all of our favorite junk food. “What are you guys doing here?”

“I told you,” Shawn says, setting the pizza box beside me before taking off his shoes to put near the door. “We’re watching movies.”

“Yeah, but aren’t you guys supposed to be at the diner?”  I sit up, making room for them on the bed. 

“If you’re not there then we don’t want to be either.”

“But…”  I shake my head. I know that it’s better to just go with it than to argue with them. “Is Connor coming?”

They share a look between each other and Brian shakes his head. “No. Not tonight. Shawn and I thought it would be fun to have it be just the three of us tonight. For old time’s sake.”

I nod once, “Oh, right. Sure. That’s good.” I clear my throat and scoot back on the bed, “Well then let’s put in a movie. What are we watching?”

McKenzie looks between them, making eye contact with me, and that smile that she has for everyone else changes. It’s now tight-lipped and forced, fake. “Y/n. I see you’re still hanging around my Connor Bug, huh?”

“I’m not your Connor Bug, Kenz.”

Kenz. The nickname rolls off his tongue so easily and I hate it.

She shrugs, ignoring Connor’s comment. “Why are you hiding? You’re not happy to see me?” She frowns. “Well that hurts my feelings.”

She’s challenging me. It’s what she’s always done. It’s how she got me to stop hanging around Connor alone - or at all for a period of time. But I’m not the same person I was back then. I wouldn’t stick up for myself then, but I sure the hell would now. 

I hum and squeeze Brian’s hand before making my way between him and Shawn. “Well to hurt feelings, you have to have them, don’t you, McKenzie?”

Shawn sucks in a breath beside me.

She chuckles softly. “Oh, come on. We can put all of that petty stuff behind us, right? It’s been years.”

“You’re right,” I nod. “It has been. So you know it’s been three years since you and Connor broke up, right?”

“I’m aware,” she nods, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“Good,” I nod too, mimicking her stance. “So then you also know that a lot can change in that time, right?”

“I guess so. What are we doing? Playing twenty questions?”

“Well you were always one for games.” I take a step forward, arms still crossed. I will not back down.  I will not let her ruin what I have worked so hard to build. “So let me ask you something then. If it’s been three years, what makes you think he’s still single?”

“Are you telling me he isn’t?”

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you. He and I are together now, in case you were wondering.”

She stares daggers at me and then at Connor. "You're joking."

Connor shakes his head. "Nope. Four months."

"Oh!" She laughs. "So it's not serious then."

"We also live together," I tell her. "Although whether or not we were dating for four months, four weeks, four days, that shouldn't really matter." I make my way back over to Connor, who puts his arm around my waist instinctively. "We’re together and I'd appreciate it if you didn’t try to flirt with my boyfriend."

"Well it looks like things really have changed, huh?"

"Yeah, but you haven’t."

"You know it's not gonna last, right? You're just a fluke. He needs to get it out of his syst-"

"Enough, McKenzie! Fuck, just stop!" Connor exclaims. "Look, I'm sorry I ended things the way I did in high school, but we weren't right for each other. You were horrible to my friends, you manipulated me into hurting the most important person in the world to me. You just wanted to boss me around. Sure there were some good moments, but those didn't outweigh all the hurt and pain you caused. Now you can be mad or jealous or whatever the fuck it is that you are right now, but it doesn't change anything. I'm with y/n. I'm in love with y/n, and we're happy, so just leave us alone."

She stands there, speechless. I’ve never seen her speechless before and I like it. But it doesn't last long. She plasters on the smile reserved just for me and nods. “Okay. Well, just so you know,” she says, but she’s only saying it to me, despite our group of friends around us, “whatever you two do in bed together, he learned from doing it with me. If it’s the best head you’ve ever received, I taught him everything he knows. Have a good night.” She pushes past us and I chuckle, turning in Connor’s arm to lunge at her, but he quickly pulls me back.

“Let go of me, I’m gonna rip out those ugly extensions,” I seeth, still reaching for her as Connor and now Shawn and Brian are practically dragging me to the car. 

“While we would love to see it, that’s not gonna happen,” Brian says, opening the passenger side door.

“Fine, then let me break her nose. Give her an excuse to get that nose job she was always whining about.”

Shawn laughs from beside me as he bends down to grab me from behind my thighs and shove me in his Jeep, despite me still resisting. Connor’s walking to the other side of the car to turn it on. “Well that’s very thoughtful of you,” Shawn says, biting back another laugh. “But we’re gonna hold off on that.”

I’ve just now realized that Alessia and Liv are still with us, following us to the car, getting a front row seat to my crazy. They weren’t around when Connor and McKenzie dated, and for the most part, they knew little to nothing about the relationship. All they knew was what I had written in the songs I wrote with Shawn, and even then it was only about how I was feeling, and less so about her and their relationship. 

I scoff and fall back against the seat, my head thrown back in frustration. Shawn pulls at the seatbelt and Connor takes it from him to buckle me in. “I can buckle my own seatbelt,” I grumble.

Connor smooths my hair back, “I know you can, baby. We just want to help.”

“Then get me out of here.”

“Okay,” he nods. “Shawn, can I take your-”

“No,” I shake my head. “I want Shawn to drive.”

“What?”

I take in a deep breath and shut my eyes tight. “Bub, I love you. But right now if I look at you, I’ll see her and I’ll end up being upset with you. I don’t want to be upset with you, so just, please.”

He sighs, “Okay. I’ll ride back with Brian.” He shifts and kisses my temple gently. “I love you,” he says quietly.

“I love you,” I say back.

—

“Hey, Shawn?” I say quietly after we’ve been sitting in silence for the first five minutes of the drive.

“Yeah?”

“Do you know what prompted their breakup? Like why he suddenly went from being so in love with her to not wanting anything to do with her in the span of like two days.”

He sighs, “Y/n, I don’t think this is a good conversation to have with me.”

“Why not?”

“Because I can’t speak for him. I know, from my perspective, what happened, but I don’t know what he was thinking at the time.”

“Well, then from your perspective, what happened?”

He turns on his signal light, merging lanes. “I know that Brian had to talk to him about how McKenzie was treating you.”

“Brian talked to him about that?”

Shawn nods, “Yeah. Connor came up to us about a month after you, me, and him started hanging out by ourselves. Asked him what the deal was. Why we weren’t inviting him out anymore, why we didn’t sit with him and her at lunch, why you would barely even look at him anymore. I don’t remember exactly what Brian said because obviously it was years ago. But it was something along the lines of how she treated you like trash and we were tired of sitting around and letting it happen, so we decided to just distance ourselves. If he wanted to hang out with us, he still could, but he had to do so without her.

“And, I mean, you know what happened after that. They broke up like a month later, right, and things were back to normal. As they should have been.”

“Normal is a relative term.”

He chuckles, “Okay, yeah. It took a while there, but you guys worked through it, and you’re here now. So just think about that. After all of that, you’re here now. You’re together. You’re in love. All is right in the world.”

“Why didn’t y’all ever tell me that y’all talked to him about what was happening?”

Shawn sighs, “I guess we didn’t want to hurt you even more. You were already in a world of pain at the time, and we knew bringing him up would only make it worse. Hell, we were scared to even let him start hanging out with us again because we didn’t want you to freak out and leave.”

I look down at my hands, “It was a really bad time, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah,” he agrees. “It was. Brian and I hated seeing you in so much pain. We hated that we couldn’t do anything about it. No matter how much we really wanted to, we couldn’t fill that Connor-shaped hole in your life.”

“But you tried,”  I reach for his hand, squeezing it three times. “I never told you guys thank you for that.”

“There was no need to. We just wanted to be there for you.”

Connor leaves me alone for the most part when we get home. Well, all the guys do. They know I need a moment to process everything that just happened. You know like the fact that Connor just told me he loved me for the first time, and wrote a song about me, and then his fucking ex-girlfriend just showed up out of nowhere and ruined the whole night. I’m sitting on my bed, my knees pulled up to my chest as I stare at the photos on my wall. I still haven’t changed out of my clothes yet. 

A knock sounds from my door and it opens before I can tell them to come in. It’s Brian.

“Hey,” he says softly. “Just came to check on you. You alright?”

I shrug, but usher him in. “Sit down with me?”

He nods and steps in, closing the door behind him. “What’s up?”

“When we were in the car, Shawn told me that you had a conversation with Connor before he and McKenzie broke up. About me. And the way she treated me.”

Brian sucks in a breath but nods anyway. “Yeah, I did.”

“Can you tell me what happened?”

He sighs, “Y/n, I don’t-”

“Please?”

He relents, “Okay. Well Shawn and I were at my locker, I don’t remember what we were talking about. Doesn’t really matter, I guess. He just showed up like he would any other day, except this time he was mad.”

“Yo, what the actual fuck?”

“Excuse me?” Brian rears back.

“Like, what? Are you kicking me out of the group or something? You’re barely talking to me, Shawn’s always busy when I ask to hang out, and y/n hasn’t even looked at me in weeks.”

Brian and Shawn share a knowing look, and Shawn shrugs. “We’d invite you if we knew it was just you.”

“What? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means we aren’t the biggest fans of your girlfriend,” he shrugs. “And you can’t tell us that it’s because we don’t know her. We know enough. We know her and we don’t like her. So, if you want to hang out, great, but don’t bring her with you.”

Connor scoffs, “She’s my girlfriend, Brian. I want to spend time with her.”

“And that’s great. You can totally do that, and you should. But don’t make us spend our time with her when it’s just supposed to be us four. We’re not dating her, we’re not asking for her. We’re asking for you.”

“I don’t get why you don’t like her? Like what’s the big deal?”

Brian shakes his head, “The big deal, Connor? She’s a bitch. And you can be mad at me for saying that, but holy fuck. Do you see the way she is with y/n? She’s so rude to her, it’s not even funny, but you go blind or deaf when she’s around. I mean, the last time we all hung out, y/n left almost in fucking tears and you didn’t do anything about it like you normally would. Your girlfriend hates your best friend.”

“That’s not true.”

“Not me, not Shawn. Y/n. Everyone knows that you two are best friends, but you’ve totally dropped her since McKenzie came around. I mean, you make your own decisions, that’s cool. But you can’t force that relationship on me and Shawn. We know where our priorities lie, and we know who’s important, and that’s y/n. She’s one of the most important people in our lives, and she used to be the most important person to you. But it’s clear that things have changed. It was just the three of us before and if it has to be that way now, then I guess that’s how it is. We’ll pick her every time. I guess the question is, will you?”

Brian shrugs, “He chose you. It just took him a while.”

I sigh and rest my head on his shoulder. “I hate that I made you choose.”

Brian sighs and takes my hand, “You didn’t. We did that on our own. You’re important to us and you were hurt by the one person you thought would never hurt you. The one person we thought would never hurt you. There’s no chance we weren’t gonna be on your side.”

“Y’all are always protecting me.”

“It’s our job, hon. Now, I think you need to go talk to Connor. He’s been pacing since we got back, he’s creating a draft,” he jokes. 

I shake my head with a soft laugh, “I thought it was a little chilly.”

He squeezes the back of my hand, “There’s our girl. You want me to call him in?”

“No, I want to change first. I’ll go talk to him in a minute.”

“Promise?” He holds his pinky finger out.

I lock our fingers, “I promise.”

“Okay,” he presses a kiss to the top of my head and stands up.

I wait a couple minutes after he leaves the room before I’m able to pull myself up and change into my pajamas. I find one of Connor’s softest shirts in my drawer and throw it on with a pair of shorts that I find thrown in there. I go to the bathroom to take off my makeup before going to Connor’s room.

He’s sitting at the edge of his bed, biting his nails and shaking his leg with all the lights off except for the lamp by his bed. I sigh and knock on the open door. “Hey, can I come in?”

He looks up at me with wide eyes, “Pretty girl,” he sighs. “C’mere,” he motions me in with both arms and stands up. I’ve barely made it two steps in before he’s wrapping me in a tight hug. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know she was gonna be there, I promise. I would never do anything to jeopardize what we have. You are the most important person to me and I-”

“Shh,” I shush into his neck. “I know. I know, baby. Just calm down. You don’t have to apologize. Let’s just go to bed, okay?”

“Are you sure?”

I nod, “It’s been a long night. Let’s sleep it off. Is that okay?” I ask, threading my fingers through his hair.

“Yeah,” he nods. “That’s good. C’mon. Come lay on me.” He kicks his door shut and then walks us back to his bed where he falls down first, allowing me to lay beside him. We shuffle until we’re at the top of the bed, sliding under the covers. He pulls me to his chest and we just stay like this until sleep finally takes over. I wish it didn’t. 

We’re sitting at the beach, all four of us, because it’s been that way again for the past few weeks. Connor broke up with McKenzie, and since then he’s started hanging out with us again. The boys asked me if it was okay, first, but I couldn’t say no. I missed him. I wanted him back too. However, it’s very clear that things aren’t the same. 

Despite him apologizing to me and us hanging out alone for the first time in almost seven months, I couldn’t make it seem like everything was just perfect because it wasn’t. Yes, he was back, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t still hurt by what happened. 

So, if this was any other time than now, I would be burrowing into his hoodie instead of Shawn’s. I would be resting my head on his shoulder instead of Brian’s. I would be leaning into him and I wouldn’t think twice about it. But now, I feel like I have to think eight times about everything that I do around him. 

He’s peering at me now, but he won’t say anything. He doesn’t say much at all the rest of the time we’re here actually. 

“Hey, Bri and I are gonna play fifa at his place, you in?” Shawn asks him, his arm around my shoulders as we walk toward our cars. 

“Um, no. I have an English paper that I have to get done, so I’ll just see you guys on Monday.”

The boys nod and start to head toward Shawn’s Jeep where we all rode together, except for Connor because he was running late. I watch as Connor gets in his car and slams his head against the steering wheel. I move out of Shawn’s grasp, “Hey, I’m gonna catch a ride home with him. I’ll talk to you guys later.”

“Are you sure?” Brian asks.

I nod, “Yeah. Love you guys,” I pat both of their sides and rush to Connor’s car. I open the passenger side door and slide in before he even has time to process what’s happening. ��Okay, what the hell is going on right now? Why did you just lie to them? We don’t have a paper due.”

When he looks over at me, I see the tears in his eyes and I crumble. “I can’t,” he shakes his head. “I can’t keep pretending like everything’s fine when it’s not. Nothing’s fine anymore. I feel like everything is slipping right out of my fingers. I don’t want to play fifa with the guys, or go out and film. I want to spend time with you. I want to go out and play mini golf because you suck at it, but you still somehow win every time. I want to sit next to you instead of in front of you because you feel so far away when you’re in front of me. I want you to lean on me, trust me. Wear my hoodie when you get cold. I want my best friend back. I want my girl back,” he shakes his head and wipes at his tears.

“So yeah, I lied to them, but I just need a damn moment to take in the fact that I’ve lost you.”

I look down at my hands, nodding slowly. “I’d like my best friend back too. But I don’t know what’s okay anymore. I didn’t have you to lean on for six months. Six fucking months. I had to go through everything alone because try as they might, Shawn and Brian aren’t you. They don’t know how to help me the way you do. You didn’t lose me, Connor. I was right fucking here the whole time. But I lost you. So, I’m sorry that I can’t just lean on you like I used to, but I’m scared you’re gonna disappear again.”

He nods, sniffling. “I know, but it feels like I’m losing you right now. Because you’re right here but you’re not y/n. And I know that’s my fault, and I’m so sorry for putting you through all of this. I just, I don’t know how I let it get this far.”

“You’re not losing me,” I respond quietly. “But you can’t just expect everything to go back to the way it was the second you said you’ve broken things off with her. You know I don’t work like that. I would love to lean on you, Connor. I would love to fall asleep with you when we watch movies. I’d love to wear your jacket instead of Shawn’s, but I don’t know if it’s okay anymore. I don’t know where our friendship becomes too much, where it crosses a line.”

He nods again, “I want you to do those things so badly, but I get it. I want you to be comfortable with what you’re doing, so I guess, if we need to start fresh then that’s what we’ll do.”

I sigh and drum my fingers on the inside of my wrist, a nervous tick I picked up a few years ago. “I just want to be Connor and y/n again.”

He reaches over and takes my hand in his, rubbing over my knuckles with his thumb. “I wanna be Connor and y/n again too.”

I close my eyes tight and squeeze his hand, “I’m terrified that you’re gonna leave me again.”

“Never again. I promise.”

“Don’t promise,” I suck in a breath, “promises can be broken.”

I jolt awake, holding my chest. Connor’s quick to sit up behind me. “Hey, hey what happened?”

I shake my head, pushing my hair out of my face. “Nothing. Nothing, I just… can memories be dreams?”

“Uh, I don’t know,” he yawns. “What did you dream about?”

I shut my eyes tight, “Just a really bad time in my life. Nothing to worry about.”

“Are you okay?”

I nod, “Yeah. Let’s just go back to sleep.”

—

I wait for her to fall back to sleep. She asked me if memories can be dreams and I’m wondering the same thing. Because the dream I just woke up from was anything but. 

“Smash or pass? Really? What are we thirteen?” I ask when our group gathers into a circle around the coffee table. My parents are out of town for the weekend, so I thought I’d have a small get together. It was just about twenty of us, but there was enough alcohol to serve a party of fifty. But now, there’s only six of us left. Shawn, Brian, y/n, me, Sam and Matt. We’ve all been drinking, so we’re all staying here for the night. Y/n’s drank the most probably. 

Until today, I don’t think I’ve ever seen her drink. She’s usually the responsible one of us. I guess since we didn’t plan on leaving, she didn’t have to be tonight. I’m watching her carefully. 

“Don’t be such a downer. It’ll be fun. Y/n, we’ll start with you. Do you want a guy or girl?” Matt asks.

She shrugs, resting her chin in her hand on the table. “Doesn’t matter. Surprise me.”

“Ooh, okay. How about that girl from Pitch Perfect. Hailee something?”

“Steinfeld?” she asks. 

“Yes! Her! Smash or pass?”

She doesn’t even hesitate, “Smash. 100%.”

“Really? Interesting,” he nods.

“Are you saying she’s not a smash? Because you’d be wrong.”

“Oh, no. Totally a smash.” 

This goes on for a while, throwing out different celebrities until Sam gets a bright idea. “Okay, let’s make it interesting. People we know.”

I go to protest, but everyone nods. “Y/n, you’re up. Smash or pass with Brian.”

“Pass,” she says instantly.

He gasps, “Hey! Rude! At least act like you’re considering it.”

She holds her hand out to him, her eyes squinting, her head bobbing a little because she’s five drinks in, and I’m pretty sure all her drinks had at least two shots in them. “Not because you’re not attractive. Don’t get your panties in a twist. S’cause you’re like my brother. I wouldn’t fuck my brother, that’s disgusting.”

“Alright, in another universe then?” Matt asks, but I don’t really want to know the -

“No. There’s just no attraction there. He’d try to tell me what to do and I’d bite his head off.”

“Ha,” Shawn laughs. “Which one?"

“I think you know,” she sips her drink but frowns when she finds it’s empty. “Oh, sad,” she looks in her cup with furrowed brows. “I’m getting another.”

“Ah, I think you’re done,” Brian argues. “That’s five.”

“Don’t kill my buzz just because I said I wouldn’t have sex with you,” she slurs.

“No, honey, I think he’s right. You’ve had a lot tonight,” Shawn agrees. 

I don’t know what to say because I think she’s had a lot too, but I’ve never been with her when she drinks. I guess her drinking habits are new. 

“I think you both suck, and since I’m not driving, I’m having another.”

They both sigh and look to me for help. She and I still aren’t back to where we were before, but we’re at least better than we were on the beach a few weeks ago. “Y/n, at least get some water to drink too.”

She frowns but nods, “Fine. I’ll be back, keep playing.” She staggers off, barely able to keep her balance. 

I sigh, “When did she start drinking like this?”

Shawn gives me that look. The one that says “take a wild guess,” and I know my answer then. When Kenz and I started dating. 

“Right,” I nod. “Got it.” She comes back, a water bottle in one hand and whatever concoction she just made up now. 

“Okay, who’s next?” she asks. We go around again until it’s her turn. 

“Shawny boy here, smash or pass?”

She looks him over and huffs, “Pass. In another universe where I didn’t know everything about him, smash.”

I clench my jaw, but Shawn just laughs. She’s drunk, I tell myself. It doesn’t mean anything. Except don’t people say that drunk words are sober thoughts? The next round takes a little longer, and by the time it gets back to her, she’s falling asleep on Shawn’s shoulder. 

“Hey, Con, can you help me get her to your room? She’s about to pass out and I’d rather not leave her here on the floor all night.”

I nod, “Yeah, no problem.” I stand up and Shawn puts her arm around my shoulders and I hold onto her waist while he stands, taking place on her other side. 

“Y/n, one more,” Matt says. 

“M’kay,” she nods. 

“Connor, smash or pass?”

"Dude," I start to protest, but she answers quickly and definitively. 

“Fucking smash,” she shakes her head. “A million goddamn times.”

Matt and Will laugh, but the rest of us stay silent, especially me. 

“Okay, let’s get you to bed,” I say, walking her up the steps. We get her to the room and on the bed. I walk over to my dresser to get her some clothes. 

“Is she sober enough to change on her own?”

Shawn shakes his head. “Gimme. I got it. Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve had to change her.”

“She’s been drinking like this for a while?” I question, going to my bathroom to grab the makeup remover I have stowed away for her for when she stays the night.

“Yeah,” he nods, pulling my shirt over her head. 

“Shawn?” she whines, her voice cracking. 

“Yeah, honey?”

“Why doesn’t he want me?” She whimpers, “Why am I not good enough for him?”

I rear back like she’s hit me. What? Who is she talking about? It's not me, right?

Shawn sighs deeply, "You are, baby. You’re enough," he assures her and then looks up at me. "Give me a second with her?"

I don't want to leave her because I want to know who she's talking about, but my heart doesn't. So I nod and leave the room, shutting the door behind me. I slide down to the floor and rest my head in my hands, waiting for him to come back out.

He does ten minutes later and I look up at him, defeated. "She thinks I don't want her."

He gives me a sad smile, "She's just drunk. She gets like this when she drinks."

"Drunk words are sober thoughts," I shake my head. "I can't believe I've made her think she's not good enough. That I don’t want her? I want her every day, Shawn. I always have."

He doesn't say anything except, "She’s asking for you."

I get up in a heartbeat and walk into the room. "You need something, love?" I ask gently, sitting beside her on the bed.

She looks at me with her half closed eyes and an extreme pout on her lips. "Will you lay with me? Sleep with me tonight?"

I nod, "Anything you want, it’s yours. Let me go get your water. I need you to drink it before you fall asleep, okay?” I push her hair out of her face and let my fingers trace over her cheek.

“Okay, bubba. Whatever you want,” she hums. “Hurry back.”

I let my hand linger for a moment before I get up to go downstairs. The boys are still just sitting around the table, laughing, fooling around. Brian and Shawn look up at me when they hear me. 

“Is she okay? Does she need anything?” Brian asks.

I point to the water that’s sitting by Shawn’s elbow. “I just need her water. I’m gonna go lay down with her.”

“Just lay down?” Matt wiggles his eyebrows, earning a punch in the arm from Brian.

“Shut up. She’s drunk, he wouldn’t do that,” he points to me. “You won’t touch her.”

“You know I would never do that,” I shake my head. “I’m just gonna hold her until she falls asleep. And this,” I gesture to the group, “this game never happened. Not a single one of you will bring up what happened tonight. I don’t want her to be embarrassed.”

“So, what? You’re just gonna pretend it didn’t happen?”

“That’s exactly what I’m gonna do,” I sigh, “There’s extra blankets and pillows in the closet down the hall. Make yourselves comfortable, I’m going back upstairs to lay with her.” I don’t wait for anyone to say anything because honestly, I don’t care what they have to say about it.

I walk back into the room to find her sitting against the bed frame, a picture frame in her hand. 

“Whatcha looking at, pretty girl?” I ask her, closing the door behind me.

She turns the picture to face me. It’s a photo of the two of us from last summer. I’m leaning against her, my eyes closed, face scrunched, flipping off the camera. Her arms are around my bare chest and she’s licking my cheek. I promptly tackled her after the photo was taken. “This was my favorite day.”

I hum, sitting next to her. “Mine too. Here,” I hold the bottle out to her. “I need you to drink the whole thing.”

She nods, setting the picture back down on the nightstand. There’s still a lot of photos of her in here despite McKenzie telling me to take them down. The one she just had was hidden in my drawer, but I refused to take the other ones down because they had the boys in them too. She takes a few sips, successfully downing half the bottle before handing it back to me, resting her head on my shoulder. 

“Did you take down all your photos of her?” she asks quietly.

“No,” I shake my head. “There was no need. I never had any hung up.”

“Why not? I bet that made her mad.”

It did. “Doesn’t matter,” I turn my head to kiss her forehead. 

She shifts and wraps an arm around my torso, we haven’t cuddled like this in a long time, and I wish it were under different circumstances, but I’ll take what I can get now. A few moments of silence pass before I feel her body slump next to mine. She’s out like a light. 

I sigh and lean down, kissing her forehead once again. “You’re enough, baby. I want you. I always want you. And I’m gonna show you every single day for the rest of our lives.”

***

I hope you enjoyed it! Please like, reblog, and leave feedback!!

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[wannabedonnasheridan]

wrote this a couple months ago and simply couldn't keep this just for myself. By the way, that's probably the first and last time i'm writing. Who knows?

Thanks to Connor Brashier for being himself and to the Mamma Mia movies for making me want such an amazing life.

*english os not my first language, sorry for any mistakes!*

FLUFF - based on an amazing dream :)

°•°•°

"Lay all your looooove oooooon meeeeeee" I sing at the top of my lungs. "What are you singing, bubs?" Connor asks me, coming from our bedroom only on his shorts. "Lay all your love on me, by ABBA. But the version from the Mamma Mia movie, so it's a duet. Mind joining me on this little karaoke moment?" I say, putting my arms around his neck "You know I'd love to continue listening to your beautiful voice, but I'm afraid I don't know the rest of your song" he answers me, which makes me pull away from our little hug and look straight into his eyes with a confused expression. "What do you mean 'I don't know the song'? They sang in Mamma Mia" "Okay, but why do I have to know a song from a movie I've never watched before?" he tells me, making me stare at him, shocked. "You've never seen Mamma Mia?" I ask, confusion running through my head. "Well no... what's the big deal about it?" he says, chuckling lightly at my facial expression "Except for the fact it's one of the best musicals ever made and one of your 2 years girlfriend's favorite movie? Nah, nothing much." I exclaim, causing him to become confused suddenly. "Oh, I knew you like it, but not so much" he scratches the back of his neck, probably not knowing how to react over my little 'show' "Oh lord, I failed as a girlfriend..." I whisper disappointed. "Obviously not bub... you are perfect for me. I love you despise everything" Connor says, approaching me. He pecks my lips and engulfes me into a hug. "Wait" I suddenly said, looking into his eyes "if you haven't watched mamma mia yet, lets change it now for our relationship's sake! Go pop some popcorn and grab some drinks, I'm gonna put on the movie!" I exclaim. He soon makes his way to the couch with our snacks so we can start watching it. "Prepare yourself, your life will never be the same!" I smirk slightly, making him laugh "If you say so..." he says and kisses the top of my head. I press start and the movie begins. After its two hours of duration, Connor and I are cuddled on the couch still amazed by what we've seen. "Sooooo..." I sit up and start " what do you think?" "It's a really good movie, actually" he says, looking at me "the songs, the performances and the storie are really creative and fit a lot together. But in the end we don't know who is Sophie's dad? I wanted to know SO MUCH." "Yeah, we don't know who is the real father, but let's analyse: she wanted her dad and found three possibilities that she loved. Why would she need a physical comprovation of something that was already great to her?" "That's true... oh also: she didn't marry Sky? Wasn't it the thing she wanted, like, the most?" "She ends up not marrying Sky because they decided to live their lives together and explore the world before they became a real couple. That's actually really nice to think about" I say, closing my eyes to think "You decide not to do something so responsible and end up having more teenager years. It's a great situation." I finish my own thought and see him admiring me. "What?" "Nothing, just thinking how you drift off talking about your perspective of the movie. It means a lot to you, doesn't it? he asks, holding my hand "It does... to be honest, I wanted to be Sophie when I was little. I was 8 by the time the movie came out, so I got amazed by how soon she found and decided to travel around the world with her love. It still buzzes me sometimes, how lucky she is. Lived in Greece, litteraly PARADISE, found love, didn't marry him but decided to realise her dream accompanied by him. I would do the same, except I would also want the marriage part" i say and chuckle a little. We stay quiet for a few seconds, Connor holding my hand and with a serious expression. He seemed to be deep in his thoughts. "Marry me" he says, out of nowhere. "Excuse me?" I say shocked and confused by the sudden action. "You want to have a life like Sophie, right? Then marry me. Marry me and we will travel around the world together, as a real couple" he calmly says, still sitting cross legged in front of me. "Yeah, but

I can wait until you're ready too. You don't have to do this just because of a stupid and old dream." I tell him, being honest from the bottom of my heart. I knew C was the one, but what if he wasn't so sure? "Bubs, this is not stupid. If you want or wanted to, it's important to me. I know you're the one and that someday I want to be able to call you my wife." he drops to one knee and grabs both of my hands "Make me the happiest and luckiest man on earth and marry me." "Connor..." i say, trying to keep my tears away "we are just so young! I am not saying I don't want to because trust me, I do. I mean, we are finishing college and your work with Shawn is just getting started. Maybe we should simply wait some years. I don't mind." I state. Connor thinks for a minute and stares at me again. "But I do mind. Bubs, I will eternally want and try to do whatever makes your beautiful smile appears on your pretty face" he cups my cheeks "If college is the problem, let's just wait until it ends: you graduate next year, we have a whole year to prepare. Then, we are gonna spend the next year travelling and meeting the world, no jobs and no worries. Shawn and our friends will be waiting for us, I guarantee you. So what do you say?" I think for some seconds and realize that the chance of realizing one of my biggest dreams with the boy I loved the most was face to face to me. I guess it's pretty obvious. "Yes. A thousand times yes!" I smile and hug Connor tightly "So, are we enganged yet?" "Not yet, I have to do something more special and beautiful, after all that's what you deserve." He says while grabs both of my hands again "Right after you graduate, I am gonna drop to one knee and propose properly. I promise." "That's okay with me, my soon to be husband" i whisper the last part in his ear, feeling his neck shiver under my hands. "Okay, I guess that's my favorite nickname ever" C says while pushes my to the couch and lies on me. A little squish of surprise leaves my mouth, and i start laughing. "C, we still have to watch the second movie" i say and try to get up, but he pushes me to the couch once more "Con, I am serious, let me put the DVD. I haven't seen young Donna's journey in ages" i tell him, making him laugh at my seriousness. "Okay, i'll let you go my soon to be wife." I put the DVD on and hop into the couch on top of Connor. He wraps his arms around my hips and kisses my temple gently. "I love you bubs" he whispers. "I love you more C." I whisper back, pecking his lips. The movie starts and, after some minutes, I hear Connor calling my name. "Yes, bubs?" I say, turning my head to face him. "Do Sophie and Sky end up having a baby after their trip? Because I would enjoy exercising for one a couple of days during our trip. Every night, maybe?" I keep looking at him with an interrogative expression, but when i get what he had just said, I can't help but roll my eyes and laugh. "You're impossible!"

°•°•°

[softiecaro]

MISTLETOE

Summary: Where Y/N is part of the Shawn Mendes tour staff. Everyone’s in Miami, where the last show was before Christmas, but something ruins the plans of everyone who wants to spend the holidays with their families. Camila's mother invites them all to spend Christmas at her house and they accept. Shawn and the others start a plan to reunite Connor and Y / N.

Warnings: English is not my native language so I apologize if there are mistakes.

A/N: I know, I know it's been almost a month since Christmas HAHAHAHA, but I had this in my drafts and for some reason I never posted it. 

Remember, the requests are open!

"It's a joke?" Cez asks for the third time on the phone while he keeps an irritated scowl on his face. "Ok, if there is nothing else to do ... ok, thanks, bye"

After a while, he cuts the phone and watches us all before speaking. "Ok guys, this is not easy to say."

"What happen?" Connor asks concerned.

"Our flight was canceled due to bad weather in I don't know where and apparently there is no airline that can take us home in time for Christmas"

"Are you serious?"

"Do you think I'd be kidding about something like that, Sylvie? They said that the flights will be available again in 5 days. ”Everyone sighs in surrender.

"I am very sorry for what happened, I know that everyone wanted to spend Christmas with their families" Sinu, Camila's mother begins to say "But you are all welcome to spend these holidays here, with us" She says referring to Camila, Alejandro, Sofía, Shawn and her.

"That's very nice of you Sinu, but do you think you can feed all of us tomorrow night?" She laughs in response to Cez.

"Of course. Anyway, there are 5 more people, it is nothing, you don’t worry "

It was Cez, Brian, Sylvie, Connor and Y/N who missed their flight, since the rest of the staff had taken flights to different parts that same day, but earlier.

"Then I suppose we will spend this Christmas at the Cabello’s house." Cez ends.

"It will be fun." Y/N says  looking at Camila with a smile.

"Yes, it will be." 

...

At one point in the afternoon, they were all in the living room, except Camila's father who was taking a nap, Y / N who was taking a shower and Connor who was on the phone with his mother.

"So what’s the plan?" Sylvie asks.

"I don't know, but we have to make those two take the first step tonight, or I don't know what I'll do with my life, they stress me out." Brian says exaggeratedly, referring to Y/N and Connor

"I think I have an idea," Sinu exclaims as she leaves the kitchen.

"What? Mom-" Only a few minutes later she comes back with something hidden behind her back "What are you bringing there?” With a bright and proud smile on her face, she shows us a little mistletoe.

"Oh my god, you’re brilliant." Sylvie claps.

...

"So the plan is, at some point in the night, both are under that" Camila ends.

"And finally they will kiss, for goodness sake!" Brian exclaims with his arms in the air.

"Who will kiss?" Connor enters the kitchen suddenly causing us all to panic.

"Nothing, little boy" Brian exclaims quickly while Sinu with a quick movement hides the object that only seconds before had our full attention. "How is your mother? How did she react to the news that her little boy won't be spending christmas at home? " Brian walks over to him and puts one arm around her shoulders, patting her while he ruffles her hair with his other hand.

"Don't call me little boy"

"Hey Tiny, don't get mad, we just play," Shawn says with a laugh as he tightens his grip on Camila's shoulder next to him, who laughs anyway. Connor just rolls his eyes and walks away from Brian.

“What do you all have with giving me such strange nicknames? I don’t like it, at all."

"I don't think any of those are better than the Lemon one, I think it's very original" Y/N he comes down the stairs laughing, his hair wet from the shower she had taken.

"Oh darling, go dry your hair, you can catch a cold." Sinu tells the girl. "Camila, go show him the hair dryer." Camila nods as she gets up from the side of her boyfriend, letting her arm fall on the couch.

Shawn watches Connor and sees him off guard glaring at Y/N coming up the stairs. He sighs and sits next to him.

"Hey, what's up?“

“"Nothing, could you explain to me for the last time why the nickname lemon?”

...

The night of Christmas Eve had already arrived. They were all at the table having dinner while laughing and talking about any topic.

"Can I have the wine, please?" Sylvie exclaims.

Y/ N directs her hand to the wine at the same time as Connor does, making her hands touch.

Y/N thinks everything has been really weird between her and Connor lately. When she met him over a year ago on Shawn's tour, he created a trust in her that she had never felt with anyone. They immediately started talking and became very close. Everyone thought there was something between them, many times their friends teased them about looking like a couple, but they both denied it all those times.

But lately something had changed. Y/N was a friend of touch, she liked to hug her friends in general, and Connor was no exception to her. But lately those touches of best friends that used to be given day to day began to bother her. It made her feel weird. Every time she was near him, she felt butterflies in her stomach.

Lately, Connor was feeling the same.

"Oh my God, can you stop now?" An excited Brian interrupts their thoughts. He takes the bottle of wine and hands it to Sylvie across the table.

"What do you mean? Y/N question, indifferent.

"What do I mean? I mean… ”Brian makes a strange gesture with his hands. "That. That you two do"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Connor says nervously as he takes a sip from his glass.

...

"It is time."

"Will they really do this?" Cez asks laughing.

"Yeah, what makes you think we wouldn't?" Shawn asks.

“I don't know, I thought they were joking. I think both are old enough to make their own decisions and take the first step, they are not little kids "

"They're not little kids, but they're stupid." Sylvie slaps Brian on the shoulder after her comment.

"Besides, we're just giving them a little nudge." Says Sofía, Camila's sister.

"It's just a mistletoe, what if they don't want to kiss, anyway?"

"They must do it, it's a tradition, it's the rules" Sinu tells her husband as she begins to hang the mistletoe on the door that divides the kitchen and the living room. She then she walks into the kitchen with Sofia.

"And you support this Sinu, it can't be." Alejandro tells him, following his wife to the kitchen.

"She is part of us, yes." Camila says proudly.

"Where are they now?" Shawn asks Camila.

"Outside"

"What if they already took the first step?" Cez asks half disinterested.

"I don’t think so". 

"Ok, I'm going to go upstairs, I don't want to see this show" Cez exclaims as he climbs the stairs.

Y / N POV

Connor and I are sitting in the backyard of Camila's house. He rests his head on my legs while I tangle my fingers in his hair.

"You know what? I've been thinking about something lately. " He says as he puts his hand on mine while I continue stroking his hair.

"What’s it?"

"I don't know, it's something that happens when we're together." He responds as he sits up, pulling away from my touch.

"What do you mean?" Is he he is feeling the same as me?

"I've felt a little ... weird"

"Oh ..."

"But not weird in a bad way, if not that ..."

"I think I know what you're talking about." I shyly say without looking at him.

"Seriously?"

"If I…"

"Connor! Can you come here and help me with something ?!" Sylvie's call interrupts me.

Connor and I look toward the house. The boy gets up first, offering his hand to help me up. We both walked inside the house.

"I think the tree star is a bit crooked, can you help me straighten it?" Sylvie says as she climbs on a chair right next to the tree to reach for the object.

"And why couldn't they help you?" Connor says with a frown pointing to the rest of our friends.

"They don't have the same sense of righteousness that you have."

"Sense of righteousness? What the hell are you talking about? "

"Just, just get at the door and let me know when it's right." Connor snorts as he heads for the door, reluctantly. "There’s good?"

"Yes Sylvie, it’s perfectly straight"

Are you sure?" She asks as she moves the object.

"No! Why did you move it? Now is completely leaning to the left "

"And now?"

“It's totally to the right, are you kidding me?

"Come on Connor, do your part a bit."

"Y/N, can you come help me?" I turn to Connor and stands next to him looking at the Christmas tree.

"Move it to the left ... to the right ... a little more to the left again ..."

"There is!" Connor exclaims, raising his arms.

"Perfect, thanks guys. Now could you see if the object above you is straight?"

I look up laughing after the spectacle of straightening the star on the Christmas tree.

A small mistletoe hung over our heads and my breath caught in my throat.

"Did you really plan this?" Connor asks, glancing at me.

"Completely." Brian admits shamelessly.

"Go ahead, pretend we weren't here"

He turns in my direction and I look at him, having to tilt my head up since he’s taller than me.

"Hey"

"Hey" I barely reply. Does he really want to kiss me? Because I do.

"If I want to," he said, as if he could read my mind. "Do you want? ... Would you like us to kiss? I mean, if you don't want to, you really are not obliged, really the mistletoe is nothing more than a stupid tradition, I will understand you completely if you don't want to kiss me-

Quickly I stand on the balls of my feet and cup her cheeks with both hands to bring her lips closer to me. Her lips are warm against mine, the kiss full of emotion and a little shyness. His hands land quietly on my hips, pulling me toward him so I can wrap his arms around your back. His lips move against mine delicately.

"At last! I can't believe it. ”Brian's voice interrupts our moment.

"Did you have to ruin his moment so soon?" Sylvie reprimands him.

"After such a long time ..." Shawn says.

“You have no right to say that. Camila and you took a hundred times longer than them."

[2000sbitch]

𝓜𝓸𝓶𝓶𝔂'𝓼 𝓑𝓸𝔂

(𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐫 𝐁𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐗 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫)

𝐀/𝐍:𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐫 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐥𝐳

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟒𝟏𝟕

»»————-　♡　————-««

“Josiah you don’t wanna play with mommy and daddy no more?” You asked your 4 year old. “No mama i play with car.” He answered turning back towards his toy cars. 

“I guess it’s just us babe.” Connor laughs

“Yeah i guess it is Brashier.” You say before tossing the foam football back to Connor. 

You admired these small moments with your little family. 

You met Connor when you were both fourteen, both immediately hitting it off having a crazy crush on the other.

But if someone told you back then that in six years you would be happily married with a 4 year old you wouldn’t have believed them. 

You had gotten pregnant with Josiah at seventeen. Both you and Connor kept it a secret from friends and family for a long time before your pregnant belly started showing. 

Both relived when you had nothing but support from both families. 

You were snapped away from your thoughts when the ball hit you right on the eye immediately gasping in pain when the ball poked you in the eyeball. 

“Shit i’m sorry baby you good?” Connor asked rushing towards you placing his hand on your wrist that was covering your eye. 

You were about to answer before you interrupted by josiah who ran over massaging his small hands on your shoulder “Ohh mama what’s wrong?” he asked. 

“I’m okay bub daddy just hit me with the ball on accident.” You smiled.

You didn’t know what he was about to do when he walked over to Connor but when he smacked him on the shoulder you were shocked.

“Don’t hit mama bad daddy!” he scolded Connor. 

“I know Siah it was an accident i promise!” Connor yelled holding his shoulder as if the little smack from his son did any damage.

“Kiss mommy she hurt.” Josiah said grabbing his dad’s face between his palms facing him towards you. 

You met Connor half way as he kissed you. 

“Don’t hit mommy with ball again okay daddy?” Josiah said placing a kiss on both of your and Connor’s cheek. 

“I won’t i’ll be more careful.” Connor laughed.

Josiah walked back to his toys playing.

“He’s such a Mommy’s boy.” Connor whispered before wrapping his arms around your waist pulling you closer. 

“I know but when we have a girl she’s definitely gonna be a daddy’s girl.” You smiled.

“Can we try for a girl tonight?” Connor asked as he placed kisses onto your neck. 

“We certainly will be.” You answered.

»»————-　♡　————-««

Send Requests if you want! <3

[brianc521]

Connor angst where he makes you not feel worth it

Been awhile since I’ve written for Connor, here you go!

Space | Connor Brashier

Connor’s been extremely busy since he’s come home from tour with Shawn. He’s been almost as busy as he was on tour. 

Collabing with David Dobrik. Connecting with Madison and planning future projects. Filming a music video with Kygo. Meetings with Shawn’s team about new music and the docu from tour. 

You’ve seen him just about as much as you did while he was on tour. The difference being, you share a home, and he is actually home. Well most of the time. While with David he hopped a flight to Vegas and didn’t tell you until after he had arrived. He’s traveled to Canada for meetings and to see Brian. Never once thinking to invite you. 

“I’m busy, what the fuck do you want me to do about it?” He spits, eyes glued to his phone.

You actually wonder if his eyes are still blue, because you can’t remember the last time he looked up from his phone long enough for you to be able to focus on the color. Soon they have to turn into a screen themselves right? 

“Take a break? It is a human thing to do.” You mutter, washing up the dinner dishes. 

“I don’t need to though. You’re just being fucking needy.” 

You look down into the sink, swallowing back the tears trying to escape you. He’s been so moody lately, and you think it’s because he spends all of his time in front of a screen. It has to pent up some energy there, cause mood changes. You just happen to be the constant in his line of fire. 

“No response?” He snides, standing up, thumb tapping at his phone rapidly. “Cool.” He rolls his eyes, turning and walking out of the room. You stare after him, shaking your head. 

What were you still doing here? He obviously doesn’t seem to want you anymore. You can not pinpoint the last time you remember being in bed together at the same time. Or when he touched you last. He’s constantly telling you that you bother him, and get in his way. Now suddenly you’re ‘fucking needy’ for simply wanting to know if he’d be home this weekend. It wasn’t like you were sticking your plans on him, you literally just wanted to know. 

You set the plate you’re holding down, turning the sink off before drying off your hands. You’re over it. At this point you’re more hurt in this relationship than you are happy, so why were you fighting when he isn’t. You’re actually just fighting against him, and you’re tired. 

You pass his office, noticing he left the door open for once. What you don’t see is how he leans over to see you from around his monitor screen. His brows furrow when he watches you wipe your cheek. 

He listens as you reach into the closet and pull your luggage out. He goes back to what he was editing, that is until you walk past again, this time pulling your suitcase behind you. 

His heart stops, and suddenly he can’t remember what you said to him during dinner. He can’t remember how he responded. So he gets up, walking into the hallway as you head to the bedroom. 

“What are you doing?” He asks harshly, stalking after you. 

You don’t respond, you just lug the suitcase up onto your once shared bed. He appears in the doorway when you flip the top up and open. He crosses his arms and leans against the doorframe. 

“Are you going on a trip?” He asks, voice so detached almost as if he’s annoyed.

You ignore him, and the sharp pain ripping through your chest as you think about no longer being with him. You turn and open your drawer, pulling out all your panties and bras. You dump them into the bag and turn back for your next drawer. 

“Gonna be gone long enough to need all of those?” He snickers, walking forward and sitting on the bed next to your bag. 

You turn back, and almost stop at how close he is, but continue with all your camisoles and sports bras in hand. You settle them in the bag and make sure there’s room for your shirts and pants, as long as you have the things you need for work this week you can then have the time to figure out how to come back to get the rest of them. 

His face scrunches as he watches you grab every shirt from your shirt drawer, leaving it empty as you hip check it closed. It all starts to click in his brain when you reach for your jeans. 

“Hey,” He says, looking down into your bag and then back up at your heartbroken face. “What’s happening?” He says quickly, reaching for your hands. “What happened? Is everyone okay?” 

It hurts you even more that he thinks you’re packing because someone’s hurt and needs you. Not that you’re hurt and don’t need him anymore. 

You still won’t speak to him as you throw a few pairs of shoes into the bag, turning for a few books. 

“Babe, what’s happening? Talk to me.” He stands, panicking a little. Watching you reach for your books tells him something is seriously wrong. “Where do we need to go? Your Moms? Grandpa?” He flounders, opening his closet and pulling a bag out as well. 

“No Connor,” You croak. Stopping him in his tracks. “You don’t need to go anywhere, I do.” 

“I can’t come?” He asks, stare going hard. 

“No.”

“Care to explain why?” He sets his hands on his hips. 

“Because I’m leaving.” 

“You’re leaving?” 

“I’m leaving you.” You look up at him from under your lashes, scared of his reaction.

“What?” He breathes out, voice so low that if you weren’t so accustomed to everything about him you probably wouldn’t have heard it. 

“I can’t do it anymore.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“You’re unhappy.” 

“Who said that?” He raises his voice, hands going to his hair. You flinch at the movement and turn to keep grabbing things, like your phone charger. 

“You did.” 

“No I didn’t.” 

“You did Connor, earlier when you called me fucking needy. Yesterday when you told me I was bothering you. Last week when I was ‘in the way’ while you were setting up to edit. When you stopped coming to bed. When you started traveling and saw what your life could be. What your life should be. When you realized that I hold you back from what you want.” 

“That’s not fucking true, you’re what I want.” 

“No Connor I’m not. And you’ve made that blatantly clear. So just give me a few minutes to get some essentials and I’ll be out of your way for awhile. And the next time you go out of town, probably this weekend, I’ll come back and get the rest of my things and you’ll have what you want. You just have to give me a little time to pack up my life.” 

His eyes are watering with tears, heart breaking at the fact that he actually made feel like he doesn’t want you. 

“No, I don’t want that. I want your life, here, with me. Please, don’t do this.” 

“You’ll be okay,” You sniffle, turning and jumping at how close he is now. Practically chest to chest. “Me? I’ll learn to be okay, I love you Connor. And if I don’t make you happy anymore then I love you enough to let you go so you can be.” 

“Stop, please.” He sobs, “I don’t want that. I want you, you make me so happy. I’m living the best life I could because I have you. I didn’t mean any of those things. I’ve been stressed out, and so overworked. I don’t even remember saying those things. Please let me make it better.” 

Your shoulders slump as you look at him. He’s crying in a way you’ve never seen before. You’ve been together for years, tears in front of each other have occurred. Usually for him it’s one of two cries. Hold me I’m sad, or, I’m not crying that’s dust in my eye. This though, this is a desperate cry. It’s like he can’t wrap his mind around what’s happening. He’s sobbing, can’t catch his breath as he babbles on and on. 

“I love you, I love you so much. Please, please don’t do this.” 

“Connor,” You coo, bringing a hand to his chest to get him to sit. He wraps his arms around your waist, never wanting to let go. “You need to calm down.” 

“I can’t, I mean you’re leaving me.” He hiccups, rubbing his face on your stomach, leaving tears stains on the fabric of your shirt. 

“I think we need a break.” 

“No.” He whips his head up. “We promised to never do that, we promised.” He whines. 

“We were different when we promised that.” 

“How? How were we different?” 

“We were in love then.” 

His whole world crumbles around his, you watch every muscle in his face frown. “We’re not in love?” He wails. 

“I love you Connor, and I know you love me. But we’re not the same couple we used to be. We don’t try anymore. If you can count this as a hug then I think this is the 2nd time you’ve hugged me since you’ve come home. We don’t try and fight for the other any more. We don’t try to flirt or really show our love because we’ve become reliant on the fact that we do love each other. While what we need is to show the other we care. I’ve failed too, it’s on the both of us. So let’s take some time, give some distance and see if we can find that couple again.”

“I don’t want you to leave, I’ll stay in the guest room if you want space. Just don’t leave.” 

“No Connor, we need more space than that.” 

“Please, I’ll make it better just don’t leave.” 

“I’ll call you in the morning, before I leave for work.” You sigh, prying his hands off and reaching for your suitcase. After getting it zipped up and back on the ground you feel his hand wrap around your wrist.

“Let me take you out tomorrow. A date, like we used to. Let me make you fall in love with me again.” He pleads.

“Okay,” You smile, nodding at him. 

He hesitates, but leans closer. “Can I kiss you?” He whispers. 

You contemplate it, but in the end know you need him too. So you nod and hold back your own cry when his lips touch yours. It’s a kiss you haven’t had in awhile. It’s soft, and slow. Needy and desperate, but all the love you haven’t felt in so long. 

You haven’t even left yet, but the space is working. You know you’ll be back in this room soon enough. This time with your lover with you.

[xeunoais]

Connor Brashier MS

(A/N): ! = author’s favorites

-

 - left with a broken heart !

 - rumor 

 - better half

 - four years !

 -  quarantined lovers (request)

[motherlifesucher-archives]

The Connor Situation l Shawn Mendes Imagine.

(a/n): this is super different from what I've written before and it’s kinda long (3k+ words!)

summary: Shawn is Camila’s boyfriend, (y/n) is Connor’s girlfriend, but they’re drawn to each other.

warning: mentions of drugs, sex and cheating.

A faint smell of weed lingered on the luxury Malibu house Shawn rented to celebrate the end of the tour. 

Shawn wanted to spend time with the closer part of his team without the urge of moving from city to city and putting on a concert every night. Of course, no one from Shawn’s inner circle wanted to spend more time apart from their loved ones, so the house was big enough to host at least fifteen people. 

You had met Connor back in high school, where he easily was one of the most popular kids because of his work with famous people and undeniable talent, so it was a surprise when he asked you out and everything went on from there. Of course, after he was admitted into UCLA it wasn’t expected that he’d take a break to tour the world with none other than Shawn Mendes.

You couldn’t deny it had been hard, especially after Shawn hired him for the entire tour and not just a part of it. You made it work, somehow.

Shawn, on the other hand, had been in love with Camila for ages before he mustered the courage to put a name on their relationship and go public, driving people around the world crazy, for better or for worse. 

You carefully removed the covers from the bed, wanting to get something to eat since it was 9 AM already, but an arm draped over your waist prevented you from moving. 

“Where are you going?” Asked the sleepy voice of your blue eyed boyfriend. 

“To grab something to eat, do you want me to bring you something?” You whispered, not wanting to disturb his post sleep haze.

“Mm’no, I just want you on my bed.” He tried something that resembled an adorable pout, making you laugh. 

“I’ll be back, don’t miss me too much.” You left a kiss on his messy hair before grabbing your silk robe that was thrown on the floor. 

“You’re leaving under protest.” You heard Connor mutter before he went back to sleep, his soft snores flooding the room. 

You carefully made your way to the kitchen, not wanting to wake anyone up. Everything was quiet until a tall figure leaning on the kitchen counter almost gave you a heart attack.

The person chuckled. “Good morning, I wish I had known I have that effect on you.” Shawn joked while sipping on his green tea. 

“I didn’t think you’d be here, everybody else is asleep and I think I just died of a heart attack.” You dramatized, making Shawn’s eyes crinkle. 

He was going to add something when a faint moan and the sound of a bed crashing softly against the wall, as if they had put a pillow on the corner to muffle the sound, flooded the house. You noticed a shudder run through Shawn’s body, but you didn’t know if it was because he was disgusted or turned on. “Well, at least someone’s having fun.” Shawn said with his eyebrows raised. 

“My oh my, should we put a ‘no sex in the house’ warning?” A female voice entered the kitchen before you could respond. Camila had her hair tied on a messy ponytail and her outfit matched yours. “Hey baby, figured you’d be here.” She kissed Shawn’s shoulder. 

“Yeah, I got hungry. I think there must be leftover jet lag on my body.” 

Camila just then noticed your presence, and you didn’t blame her; you wouldn’t pay attention to anyone if Shawn was your man. “(y/n)! I’m so sorry I didn’t see you, guess I'm still sleeping,” She chuckled. “Is Connor still asleep?” 

You nodded while taking a sip of water. “Yeah, he was snoring when I left the room.” 

Just then, Connor’s voice could be heard from your room screaming “SHUT UP!”. Immediately after, the soft moaning and bed crashing stopped. 

The three of you stared at each other before exploding in a fit of laughter. You couldn’t breathe, especially when Shawn placed a hand on your naked leg as he couldn’t contain his laughter. 

Shawn was an attractive man, there was no denying that fact. He was desired by millions around the world, but what made him the most endearing was his personality; his timid yet extremely cheeky and mischievous demeanor was what made him a good catch and almost irresistible. 

That didn’t make him better than Connor, though. 

But it still didn’t make sense why his warm hand left a tingling feeling on your leg after he removed it, only to continue laughing along his girlfriend. 

“I think I should go check on Connor, I’m not sure he took this morning sex thing very well.” You joked. 

“I don’t think he’s unfamiliar with morning sexual activities, he loved calling you early to start the day.” Shawn said with a suggestive tone, looking for your eyes. 

“I think I'm just gonna walk away now.” You narrowed your eyes playfully before walking away with your glass of water. 

The image you found in front of you was equally funny and adorable. 

A shirtless Connor was pouting with a pillow covering his ears, but you could still make up strands of his messy blond hair. 

“You love making a scene, don’t you?” You put the glass of water on the night table before sitting on Connor’s legs. 

Your boyfriend placed the pillow under his head to have a better position to admire you. He placed his hands on your waist while still pouting. “I swear to God it’s Brian and that Portuguese girl he sexted during the entire tour.” 

You giggled. “You should be happy your friend is getting laid!” 

“He can get laid quietly if he’s sharing a room. I swear during tour everyone got laid and I could hear them all, I didn’t think I'll have to relive my nightmares during our relax time.” He slowly moved his hands from your waist to your hips. 

You carefully climbed from his legs to his lap so that his hands could reach your body more easily. “Are you mad because you didn’t get any during tour?” You leaned in to peck his lips. Connor nodded, still pouting. “You’re just a big baby, I did visit you during tour and, if I recall correctly, had sex.”

“It was not the same!” He protested. “And we had sex yesterday, but were careful to be quiet because Shawn stayed on his room while everyone went to the beach.

It was impossible to keep a straight face when your boyfriend was basically a big baby, so you opted for the easy way out; you carefully reached for his hair before kissing him. A low moan erupted from his throat before quickly and eagerly responding your action, transforming a sweet kiss to a passionate one as his hands wandered lower on your body.

Just as you noticed Connor’s hands trying to untie your robe, the door opened abruptly, making the both of you jump. 

Brian didn’t notice your position at first. “Dude, you fucked my... Fuck! How dare you call me out when you’re fucking with (y/n) as well!” 

Brian’s loud voice gathered some unwanted attention, especially Shawn’s that couldn’t help it but walk towards your room. 

“Fuck, man. Don’t you knock?” Connor let out a deep breath while running his hands on his har, as you hid yourself under the blankets deciding whether this was funny or mortifying. 

Brian left the room while quietly cursing your and Connor’s name, but Shawn stayed there, quietly eyeing the situation. 

When you resurfaced from under the covers, you noticed his hazel orbs on your opened robe. 

No, your mind was just playing games with you.

-

The incident had taken place two days ago and there wasn’t a person in the house that hadn’t made fun of you, but especially Brian, since he had actually been heard by everyone. 

The weather was warm, perfect for a day on the fancy lagoon pool on the backyard.

Everyone tried to make a dish for lunch, but it ended up being a disaster since no one really thought there would be no space in the kitchen, but it was part of the fun. 

Connor couldn’t help but bring his camera to never forget a moment of the incredible time you were having. You were lying on your stomach with your your swimsuit, not caring about anything until you noticed a pair of prying eyes on your figure. Shawn was sipping on a cold beer while talking to Josiah and Andrew, but his playful gaze couldn’t help himself. 

You quickly turned around, knowing his girlfriend had just dived into the pool while joking with Dave and his wife. Meanwhile, your boyfriend was teasing Zubin as he zoomed on his mouth while he ate. 

Suddenly, your body felt warm, too warm. You made eye contact with Connor, who looked at you worriedly as you made your way inside the house, but you made a kissing face at him to make him laugh. 

The kitchen had become your favorite place on the house, especially because the sound of the waves crashing was calming and made the mess on your mind seem less important. 

Shawn had always been flirtatious, it was part of your nature, so the whole freaking out act from your part was pure nonsense, but that wasn’t the reason why your mind was spinning.

No, it was because the love of your life was right outside looking out for you. The man of your dreams, Connor Brashier knew you like the palm of his hand and so did you. This whole infatuation with Shawn was because he was a world famous singer, not because you actually wanted something with him, because you knew he could never amount to the man who owned your heart. 

Still, you jumped when his hand made contact with your naked skin, again. 

“Hi Shawn, did you need anything?” You asked him in a fake, high pitched voice to mask your nervousness.

“You know I have a girlfriend, right?” He asked out of nowhere, making you almost choke.

“Yes, you know I have a boyfriend, right?” You retaliated, making Shawn chuckle. 

“Oh, trust me, you don’t let me forget that.” He shook his head. You couldn’t bare to look him in the eye so opted to focus on the swallow tattoo on his hand. 

A surge of courage ran through your veins as you mustered the courage to face Shawn. “Is it all in my head or have you been checking me out since we arrived?” 

Shawn chuckled nonchalantly, which you couldn’t decide if it was annoying or incredibly charming. “Oh, it’s been way longer than these couple of days,” His confession took you off guard, you were about to ask him what was going on in his mind but he continued. “This is not a confession about loving you, I wish I never laid my eyes on you. But I can’t help this fire that you ignite inside me.” 

You were taken aback as your body trembled with desire at his low voice and confession. “What about Camila? What about Connor?!”

“I love them both, that doesn’t mean I can’t want you.”

“Am I supposed to jump your bones now because I want to sleep with you? Have a one night stand and betray Connor?” 

Your tone threw Shawn off since it was tainted with hostility. “I’m not expecting you to sleep with me, I was answering your question.”

You turned around, not being able to look at Shawn anymore. Your breathing was picking up and you knew he had taken a step closer to you. “Stop with the touches, with the glances, respect your girlfriend and your friend.”

“Likewise.” Shawn hit back. 

“I’m not the one making suggestive comments or ogling you like a piece of meat!”

“Don’t play victim! You can cut the tension with a fucking knife so get off your high horse.” 

Both of your breathings had picked up, your eyes closed and didn’t realize you had taken two steps forward. 

You were standing so close to Shawn you could feel his breathing, but if you paid enough attention the voice of everyone in the backyard could be heard as well.

His head moved around, taunting your lips that were close enough to touch, but neither of you made the move. Your hands carefully found their home on his damp curls as his warm skin met yours. 

You knew you were too wet to resist him, but in that right moment you heard footsteps, indicating someone was on their way to the kitchen. Swiftly, you pushed Shawn and turned on the tap to throw some cold water on your face, trying to calm your breathing and hold back the tears that were threatening to spill. 

The person you least wanted to see appeared on the kitchen. Connor was standing with a worried look on his face, especially when he noticed the distressed state you were in. 

“Babe, are you okay? You have me worried.” Connor walked towards you and tenderly placed his palm on your cheek.

You faked a smile before answering. “Yes, honey. I woke up a bit dizzy, but everything’s okay now.” 

Shawn cleared his throat. “Yeah, she was a little pale when I found her, but she seems fine now.” His eyes were fixated on yours. 

“You wanna go lay down?” Connor asked fixing your hair, placing it behind your ears. 

You wanted deny his suggestion, but you didn’t have it in you to see facing Shawn and see Camila. “Yeah, I think it’d be best.”

Connor lovingly kissed your forehead. “Let’s go, we can catch up with Modern Family.”

“You don’t have to, you should be having fun with your friends.”

“I’ve seen them for months, I just want to be with you.”

You didn’t notice when Shawn left the kitchen. 

-

It was the last day on the Malibu house and the end of the trip couldn’t come soon enough. It was the last night before going home, since Shawn and Camila would be headed to Toronto while you and Connor stayed in California since both of you wanted to spend time with your families and had to get back to school.

Connor couldn’t help but notice something was off with you and it was easy to tell he wasn’t buying the whole “I'm not feeling good” bullshit. But it didn’t matter anymore, because chances were you would never see Shawn again, you wouldn’t cross paths with him or Camila, and you’d be able to focus on Connor, love him, cherish him and get rid of the guilt pooling your gut every time you saw him smiling at you. 

Everyone headed to the bonfire on the private beach of the house, but it was the last place where you wanted to be. 

Excusing yourself saying you were cold, you left a kiss on Connor’s hair before heading back inside. 

It took Shawn ten minutes to excuse himself saying the big lunch had taken a toll on him. 

It took him seconds to find you on the kitchen, quietly admiring the dark night. 

And you didn’t process when his arms were around your waist, turning you around to face him. 

This time you didn’t jump when his cold hand made contact with the inside of your thigh.

He didn’t hesitate to make you jump and walk you to the room he shared with his girlfriend. 

There wasn’t time or intention for soft touches or sweet kisses to build the atmosphere. No, the atmosphere had been building for days and you didn’t want to give your mind any second to doubt your actions when you knew your boyfriend was right outside laughing with his friends, not knowing he was being betrayed by two of the most important people on his life. 

A moan ripped trough Shawn’s throat as his tip made contact with your warmth. You didn’t waste anytime in start moving on top of him, placing your hands on his firm torso as he aided your movements. 

Shawn tried his best to not make any sounds, all the noises wanting to escape his mouth were muffled by your hand and yours were being trapped by your own teeth biting on your lower lip so hard you could taste the blood. 

The bliss was ethereal and both you and Shawn were sure you were able to touch the galaxy with your fingertips as an unremarkable high took over your sweaty bodies. Your body collapsed on top of his, both of your breathings were rapid and uneven. It took a minute for your mind to start spinning and realizing what had happened, but it wasn't enough to keep relishing the spasms still washing over your bodies. 

It took a few minutes for your legs to regain its function and that was the moment you stood up and without sparing a second glance to the person lying on the bed with a fucked look, both mentally and physically. Your body hastily removed itself from the comfort of the bed, completely ignoring the female clothing scattered on the floor and the open suitcase. 

You grabbed the first thing you saw in order to cover your naked body, but you didn’t realize it was a black Champion hoodie, impregnated with Gucci’s easily recognizable Made to Measure fragrance, otherwise known as Shawn’s smell that was known by everybody who had contact with him. 

He didn’t ask any questions, he just watched you leave the room and close the door. 

You knew the tears were coming because your vision became blurry, only reaching your room out of habit. But you didn’t expect the sight in front of you. 

Connor was sitting on the edge of the bed, somber look decorating his soft features and the puzzle he had been trying to deny and convince himself was on his head, made sense. All the weird behavior and awkward encounters clicked. 

And he didn’t need to look at the black hoodie to know it didn’t belong to him. 

[queenmendes]

cozy day

connor brashier x reader

Note: this is kinda all over the place and it’s been a while since I did anything for Connor but @connordavidscamera needed some Connor cuddles and love! Hope y’all enjoy xxx

The rumble of thunder forced your eyes open as you snuggled into the fluffy pillow. It was refreshing to be woken up naturally rather than by the annoying alarm meant for your lectures; thankfully today, you didn’t have to attend one. The room was lightly lit from the grey clouds outside and you could hear the light sprinkle of rain tapping against the window. It was the perfect day for you to stay wrapped in bed with cheesy movies playing, and that is exactly what you are going to do.

Before finding the will to get out of bed for food, you decided to scroll on instagram. The first thing you noticed was Connor’s icon on the list of new stories. Clicking on it brought up a picture of his empty, unmade bed. The sight made you pout as you wished you woke up next to him this morning. Quickly snapping a screenshot, you send it to him with a text.

iMessage to Hot Stuff: Oof, this bed looks extra cozy today

iMessage from Hot Stuff: would have been cozier with you in it this morning, love. Missed my cuddles

Instead of replying, you quickly got out of bed and slipped on a pair of sweats, one of Connor’s hoodies and a pair of shoes. You washed your face and brushed your teeth before grabbing your keys and wallet and made your way into the rain.  

_____

It took you less than an hour to get to Connor’s place, hands full of bags filled with goodies from your stop at the store. You knew Connor was still in lecture from the lack of his car so you grabbed the spare key and made your way into the apartment.

Connor walked through the door about ten minutes later as you were pulling out all the ingredients to make homemade pizzas, a tradition between the two of you since you started dating; every time you had a lazy day, you made pizzas and brownies and then snuggled together as random movies played.

“Hi babe.” Connor placed his bag on the table before making his way to you, placing a series of small kisses all over your face, letting him hear that contagious laugh of yours. His arms wrapped tightly around you as he stands behind you, humming lightly. “Cozy day?” He questioned as he saw the ingredients spread across the counter.

“Yes, the rain and photo of your bed made me want pizza and your cuddles.” You grinned, starting to roll the dough out. Connor smiled brightly at you before grabbing what he needed to make the brownies he knows you will want later. A comfortable silence fell over you as both of you finished prepping the food. You were lightly dancing as you placed the pizza into the oven.

“Now, go change.” You demanded lightly as the two of you made it into his bedroom. Smoothing the comforter out and fluffing the pillows before adding two more giant blankets to the mix.

“What are we watching baby?” Connor came out in just a pair of grey sweats, knowing exactly what he is doing by that little smirk on his face. His question went unanswered as your eyes fell over his bare chest to the sweats that sat lowly on his hips, giving you a great view of his perfectly tan v-line. “Baby?” Connor’s voice went huskier as he leaned over your from the spot of his bed.

“Why are you so attractive?” You asked, wrapping your arms around his neck to bring him down closer to you. “It’s going to be hard to focus on the movie when there is such a hot specimen next to me.” You tease, causing Connor’s adorable laugh to fill the room. His nose nuzzled into yours as you reached for his computer to search for a movie.

As your eyes wandered over the screen, Connor’s baby blues looked at you. HIs eyes tracing every detail on your face, ones that he knew by heart already. It never failed to amaze him how you make him feel from the simplest things such as homemade pizza and cuddles. Everyday he falls more in love with you; and everyday something new reminds him on why you will be the woman he marries.

“Are you even looking with me?” You asked, eyes never leaving the screen but you felt his on the side of your face. Connor smiled before scooting closer.

“How about the Avengers?” He asked, knowing you loved Marvel movies more than anything. You happily agreed and went to pull the movie up when the oven beeped, signalling that the pizza was done. Connor kissed your head and made his way into the kitchen, coming back a few minutes later with plates.

You froze as Connor obnoxiously moaned after every bite, knowing exactly what the sound does to you. You rolled your eyes at his laugh as you continued eating and watched as Tony Stark appeared on the screen.

___

The two of you were finishing the second movie when you shifted, pressing yourself as closer as possible to his side. Connor grabbed your leg, pulling it over his waist, gently rubbing up and down in a soothing pattern. His lips met your forehead when you placed your head on his chest. As you watched the screen, Connor was watching you again. Every small twitch of your lips or when you giggle lightly.

“Marry me.” Connor whispered so softly, he didn’t think you heard him; but you did. You froze, thinking you misheard.

“What?” You whispered, looking up at him. Connor saw the emotions in your eyes; anxiety was there but love, adoration, and hope massed it.

“Marry me.” Connor said more confidently. You paused the movie and sat up, turning to face him. “I want to come home to you everyday and have movie marathons or make pizza and brownies and snuggle under a mountain of blanket whenever I want. I want to be able to watch you dancing around the kitchen or put up with rewatching shows a million times because you are obsessed with them and never want to stop watching them.” Connor began his rant, making tears form in your eyes.

“Every day, every time I see or even think about you, all I want to do is put a ring on your finger and be able to know that you will be my wife. That you will be by my side for the rest of our lives. Because you are the most beautiful, thoughtful, goofy, supportive person I know and I know there is no one else meant for me but you.” Connor leaned over, pulling a small box out from his side table. “I know it's sudden and we are still young and in college, but I love you, Y/N and I want you to be my wife.” Connor finished, opening the box to reveal a stunning ring. It was a silver banded ring with a diamond placed in the middle , wrapped by small diamonds giving it the effect of vines. It was exactly a ring you would wear, nothing overly dramatic and different than other rings. Connor watched anxiously as you silently stared at the ring.

“Yes.” You beamed over at him. “Yes, yes, yes, yes.” You repeated. Connor sighed in relief as he placed the ring on the proper finger. You squealed and jumped into his lap, your lips smashing against his in a passionate, searing kiss. His hands caressed your waist gently as the kiss continued but soon enough, he couldn’t contain his smile.

“I love you.” He whispers, staring at you with such love and awe. You almost felt yourself tear up again at his gaze.

“I love you.” You kiss him gently once more, “Now, go get me a brownie please.”

[brashierc]

Doubts

This is heavily unedited, but I needed to post something. So here you go!

You were having an insecure moment. It stemmed from the dream you had last night while you slept alone in his bed for the second night in a row. This dream leading you to have insecure thoughts and doubts about what Connor was feeling.

Connor was CEO of his Production Company and lately, after having produced one of the biggest names in the music industry documentary, business was booming. With interest and projects rapidly flying through his office Connor has become extremely stressed and busy. He can’t even remember the last time he truly had a down moment, with himself or spent with you. 

His new assistant Sam has slowly become your best friend. With the amount of times you’re in contact with Sam to figure out Connor’s schedule, and see if you can talk to him between meetings, or the times Sam’s called you for Connor’s holiday schedule. 

Everything in Connor’s world seems to be growing and moving a thousand miles a minute, while you’re at a standstill in the corner. You’re in a small selling slump at work. It’s slowly getting closer to holiday time which means every now and then your store has a big sale, but it’s still pretty slow. 

You woke up from your nightmare last night still accompanied by cold sheets. It was almost 4 am and Connor still hasn't come home. Sam had called you earlier telling you that Connor should be off at a decent hour and Connor would like for you to be at his place. You weren’t shocked by 11 pm that you were still alone and getting ready for bed.

Your nightmare consisted of Connor’s newest client Madison, the most perfect girl you’d ever seen, and him having some sort of attraction which was causing his late nights. This girl was everything you felt you were. She had the perfect ‘Barbie’ face, skinny body, long legs, long straight hair. When you saw a picture of her and Connor gushing about the music video she wants him to shoot and produce you had a moment of jealousy that you quickly pushed to the dark side of your brain. It seems that’s where you dreams are held, because it’s all you’ve been able to see lately when you shut your eyes for the night. 

It seems to be the only dream you can dream when your at Connor’s. Leading you to just stay awake for the rest of the night not wanting to have any visions of Connor with any other girl, dream or not. It broke your heart more and more and slowly made you question everything. 

So for a change, and a test in your theories, you headed back to your own apartment after work. Dragging your tired body into the cold home, shivering as you flip the heat and light a candle. 

You had done a lot for the night by the time you were ordering pasta and waiting on your delivery. You completed laundry, dishes, cleaned up the bathroom, changed your sheets and reorganized your lotions and perfumes into a cute little display on top of your dresser. 

You jumped a bit as your phone started ringing disturbing the nice silence you were in. You picked up the device, shocked to see that it was Connor’s name running across your screen. He hasn’t called you in days, usually making Sam do it for him. You actually haven’t spoken to him at all today, and it was just then that you noticed that you hadn’t. No texts, no voicemails, no stupid memes through Insta. 

“Hello?” You answered, weary that he might just be butt dialling you. 

“Baby?” 

“Um yeah?” Your brows furrowed.

“Where are you?” He asked. 

“Home?” You responded, confused at his sudden interest.

“No, you’re not here.” 

“I’m at my home.” 

“Did Sam not call you this morning?” 

“He did.” You nod, remembering Sam’s call about Connor wanting you to be at his tonight.

“So…?” 

“Well it wasn’t the first time I’d had that request this week, and frankly I didn’t believe him when he said you’d be off at a decent hour.” 

Connor doesn’t respond for a moment, and you bite your lip nervously while you wait.

“Can I come over then? I’m off tonight, and I wanna see you Baby. I missed you.” 

“Um sure, if you’d like.” 

“I’d love to.” You feel like you can hear his smile. “Have you eaten? Can I bring you dinner?”

“I ordered pasta, it should be here soon.”

“Oh.” He responds, knowing that you hate ordering food because you despise the awkward interaction of answering the door and taking your food from someone else. “Wanna change it to pick up and I’ll get it on my way?” 

“No I’m okay.” 

Connor stands dumbfounded in his living room. You were at your apartment, he couldn’t remember the last time you’d actually stayed at your place, you practically lived with him. You were ordering yourself food, and not asking him to get it for you.

“Okay well I’ll see you 10?” 

“Okay.” 

“I love you.” 

“Mhm.” You hung up on him.

Connor stared at his phone in awe when his phone beeped at him and the call ended. He knew something was wrong. That he’d done something wrong, or that you were upset about something and that left him feeling a bit anxious. He wasn’t paying attention to what he was packing all he knew was that he was throwing clothes into a bag and was out the door on his way to your place within minutes of your phone call. 

He actually ended up beating your delivery driver. 

“Hi Baby.” He greeted when you opened the door for him. 

“Hi.” You smiled, allowing him to kiss your cheek and hug you loosely. 

He watched with curious eyes as you shut the door behind him and tidied up the shoe bin by the door. You were putting a pair of flats away in your closet when someone knocked at your door. Connor answered for you and took your bag of food, paying for it and the tip. He was just shutting the door when you walked back out.

“Oh, here let me get my wall-”

“I got it Baby.” He smiled, walking past you to the kitchen to get you all dished up. 

You watched him as he unboxed your meal, transferring the food from the plastic containers to your plates. He set your food down on the table and held the chair out for you with a cute little smile. You simply took a seat and dug into your food as he sat across from you. 

“Y/n?” He whispered when you refused to make eye contact with him.

“Hmm?” 

“What’s wrong?” 

You looked up with big eyes and stared at him. “What?”

“What’s wrong? What happened? Why weren’t you at my place tonight?”

“I wanted to come home.” 

“But, I’m sorry if I’m jumping the gun here, but I thought that my place was home?” He asks softly, reaching for your hand. 

You let him take it, and stare at his thumb that rubs soothingly back and forth across your knuckles.

“Baby?” He whispers. 

What he doesn’t expect is for you to look up with tearful eyes and a deep frown splayed across your mouth. 

“Baby, what’s wrong?” He rushes to crouch next to you, holding both of your hands. 

“I had a nightmare.” Is all you can sob out.

He reaches out and pulls you from the chair down into his lap so he can hold you tightly. 

“When?” 

“Everyday this week.” 

“Oh Baby.” He coos, rocking you back and forth. “What was it about?”

“You.” You sob into his shoulder, shuddering breaths in and out. 

“Me?” He pulls back to make eye contact with you. 

“You-you-you-you”

“Breathe Baby.” 

“You” You take a deep breath, “You didn’t want me anymore, you wanted-wanted-wanted- Madison.” 

All the wind has been knocked from Connor’s lungs. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. 

“Baby,” He sighs, “Of course I want you. I only want you. I love you.” 

You just sob harder. “I was becoming worried that maybe you were bored, that you didn’t want to be with me anymore. That you were staying late at the office because you didn’t want to go home. So I thought maybe I’d just go back to mine so you could finally go back to yours.”

“Y/n L/n.” Connor holds your face so you have to look at him. “I am not bored.” He shakes his head. “I want to be with your forever. I was staying late at the office because I wanted to get done with Madison’s video so I could be done with her business and let one of the new investors take her business.” He explains. “I thought the quicker I could get it done the quicker I could be with you, and you wouldn’t have to worry about her. Even though there’s nothing to worry about. I only will ever have eyes for you.” He smiles, kissing your nose softly. “Baby, if I had it my way there wouldn’t be a ‘your place’ or a ‘my place’ there would only be ‘our place’ because I absolutely hate coming home to an apartment that you’re not in.” 

You pout at him, staring at his eyes, trying to read his expression.

“I want you Babygirl.” He whispers. “I’ll only ever want you. I promise you that.” 

“Yeah?”

“I have-” He sighs. “I have the weekend set up for us to look at houses. It was supposed to be a surprise but you need to know how committed I am to you. I have the first place booked for 9 tomorrow morning.” 

“Connor.” 

“And there will always be an ‘us’ because the future for us is coming sooner than you think.” He makes a show of kissing your left ring finger. 

“Connor David.” You sit up straight. 

“Yes ma’am, this won’t be bare for long.” 

“Stop.” You cover his mouth, groaning in disgust when he licks your palm. 

“I’m just trying to tell you how I am here for you. And how you don’t ever need to dream about me leaving you for someone else. I’m yours, you’re mine. That’s all we need to be okay. No matter where we are, what we’re doing, where we’re going, as long as we’re together then we’ll be okay. I love you so much.” 

“I love you too.” You smile, wiping your tears away.

“I’m sorry I made you doubt that. I’m sorry that I let you go to bed alone. I’m sorry that you felt like you couldn’t stay with me.” 

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not, it’s not okay. I’ll work on making that up to you. Now you need to get and hydrate so I can prove to you all night long how sorry I am and how much I love you.” 

“Connor.” You gasp when he lifts you up into your chair and pushes your plate closer. 

“Eat while I get the tub ready.” He grins, leaving a hot kiss to your neck before walking away. 

[shawnpetermuffins]

Finding Courage

A/n: Originally I was gonna post this as a 12k fic, but then I decided I wanted to change it a bit, so here’s part two of  We Were Us (This is predominantly a Connor chapter. We’ll get to Shawn as the series goes on.)

Summary: things aren’t going the way you planned, and Connor is here to help.

Warnings: I think maybe angst

Word count: 2.8k

***

“You okay?” Connor asks after I’ve cried on his shoulder the majority of the movie. Neither of us were paying attention, me for very obvious reasons, and Connor because he was trying like hell to console me; whispering sweet nothings in my ear, telling me that everything was going to be okay. I wanted to believe him, I really did. I wanted to stop hurting, even if it’s only been just over an hour since Shawn and I broke up.

“I will be,” I say, repeating what he’s already told me so many times.

He sighs and draws a cross over the nape of my neck, three times. It’s all he knew how to do to calm me even just a little bit. When I was younger and would have anxiety in public, I would always draw a cross on my palm until I felt like I could breathe again. I found that focusing on what my fingers were doing rather than the loud noise surrounding me tended to help. Connor knew that, and was always ready to help me when I needed it. And clearly I needed it now. “What can I get you? Anything?”

I shake my head, “I think I need to go lay down.”

“Okay,” he nods. “The bed is made up for you. And I’m just down the hall if you need me. You need to crawl in bed with me, you do it.”

I smile half heartedly and press a kiss to his cheek. “I don’t deserve to have you, Connor.”

“Don’t say that.”

“But it’s true. You’ve been there for me through everything. I wouldn’t make it through this without you.”

“I don’t believe that,” he wipes at my tear stained face, a little mascara coming off on his thumbs. “You’re the strongest girl I know. You don’t need me, but I’m here. I’m here for you through anything. I promise.”

“Have I told you that you’re my best friend?”

“Only every day.”

I nod, “Good. I just want to make sure you know.”

“I do. Now, go get some sleep, honey.”

“But I should help you put this up.”

“It can wait until tomorrow. Go.”

“So bossy,” I mumble, slipping from under the blanket that covered us.

“Only when I need to be.”

I don’t sleep well… or at all really. I toss and turn most of the night, replaying the night in my head. He felt bad that he had to go on tour again. He knew how much of a strain it put on us last time and he wanted to make this easier. But I couldn’t let him. My heart couldn’t take another eight months of tour, another eight months without him. I couldn’t just up and leave like he wanted me to, like I wanted to. I had things that I needed to attend to here and we both knew that. He couldn’t put his life on hold just like I couldn’t for him. But he wanted to make it work with us. He was trying. So why did I fight it so hard. Why did I insist on breaking it off? Shawn thought that things were okay. He thought things were well enough that he wrote a whole ass album about me.

Oh god, the album.

I jump out of bed and dig in my purse for the flash drive. I didn’t bring my computer, but Connor had his in his room. I tiptoe in and see he’s sleeping peacefully on his stomach, one arm under his head. I watch his bare back rise and fall for a minute, tracking his breathing because his face is mostly in the pillow, and I’m worried he might suffocate. (He doesn’t know that every time we’ve spent the night together, I’ve spent most of my night making sure he’s breathing, but that’s not for him to know. I just want to make sure he’s okay.) I’d hate to wake him, but I have to do this and I have to do it now or it’s going to drive me crazy.

“Connor,” I whisper from the doorway, but he doesn’t stir. I sigh and walk in a little more. “Connor,” I say a little louder. Still nothing. “Jesus. Connor,” I kneel beside his bed and poke his side. “Con, wake up.”

“Mmm…” he grumbles.

“Brash.”

“Hmm?”

“Wake up, I need you.”

His eyes open when he finally registers that it’s me. “Y/n. What’s wrong, honey?”

“I need to use your computer.”

He sits up, rubbing his eyes. “On the desk,” he points, his voice still heavy with sleep.

I move to get it and set it in his lap. He opens it with a yawn types in his password as I sit down next to him.

“So why’d you need my computer?” He asks, handing me the laptop.

I hold up the flash drive. “Shawn gave me the album.”

“He did what?”

“This is every song on the album. I haven’t listened to it. He was gonna show me after dinner but well… And I don’t think I can listen to this alone.”

Even in his sleepy state, I can see the sympathy in his eyes and a large part of me hates it. Hates that anyone is seeing me like this. But it’s him and I know I shouldn’t be embarrassed in front of him. “Okay, put it in.”

I nod and insert the flash drive with shaky hands. I wait for the window to pop up, and there, in front of me are fourteen audio files. I suddenly feel like I can’t breathe as I press play before I have the chance to talk myself out of it. The opening notes fill the room and I close my eyes, trying like hell not to let myself break from just the soft strum of his guitar. It’s already so roughly Shawn and I think I might lose it before his voice even –

And there is it. That voice I fell in love with so many years ago. The voice of the man that I was convinced I would spend my life with.

“Y/n, breathe.” He places his hand over mine and turns it over, once again drawing a cross on my skin. “I’m here.”

We make it through three songs – well, if you call me sobbing on Connor’s bare shoulder, “making it through.” It’s when the lyrics start on the fourth that I get a sick feeling in my stomach. I make it only twenty-three seconds in before I’m rushing to the bathroom, my best friend hot on my tail.

“I’m sorry,” I mumble, sitting back against the bathtub after emptying the contents of my stomach.

“Don’t apologize. It’s okay. Maybe, we should take this one day at a time, yeah? We can listen to the rest of the album later.”

I shake my head, “It’s not the album. This has been happening for a few days. It might just be some type stomach bug or something.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? I have medicine in the cabinet.”

“No, Connor, you’re already doing too much for me.”

“It doesn’t matter what I’m doing for you. When are you going to understand that? I’m going to do whatever I need to do for you. That’s what I’m here for.” He moves from beside me and goes to the cabinet under the sink. “What are your symptoms?”

“Just nauseous. Little tired, but I haven’t really been sleeping much.”

He digs through the container of the meds and I can’t help but laugh a little. “You run some drug cartel I don’t know about?”

He hums, “Hey, traveling a lot fucks with your immune system. I have to be prepared. I have something for everything.”

“You sound just like my mom.”

“Yeah, well. She’s taught me a lot.”

“She asked about you the other day. She wants you to come over for dinner sometime soon.”

He smiles, “I’ll call her tomorrow to set something up.” He pulls a bottle out, reading over the description on the side. “This should work for you.” He pops the cap and pours two capsules into his hand.

---

“Well… It wasn’t a stomach bug.”

“What is it? Are you dying?” Connor opens the fridge, “Beer?”

“No thanks.”

He hums, twisting the lid off his bottle and handing me a water. “This must be serious. You’re not drinking.” He brings the glass up to his lips.

“Yeah, well. You can’t drink when you’re pregnant.”

He coughs, spitting his beer into the sink. “I’m sorry. You’re what?”

“No, you heard right. I’m pregnant.”

“But I thought you said-”

“Hey, sex was the only thing we were still good at.”

He shudders, “Too much information.”

I shrug, “Sorry.”

“So, what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. Pretend it’s not happening?”

“Y/n?”

“What? I can’t tell him, Connor!”

“Why not?”

“Hello! He’s Shawn fucking Mendes. I can’t just spring a baby on him. Not with this new album coming out. Not with his tour next year. He can’t just put it all on hold. And the media will have a field day. ‘Shawn Mendes and ex-girlfriend: pregnant? Twins? Is it his?’ He doesn’t need to go through that. I don’t need to go through that.”

“Y/n, he’s the father. He deserves to know. You can’t just keep it from him because of his career.”

“Why not? We’re not gonna be seeing each other anymore.”

“Um, hi. I still work for him!”

“Oh. Oh. Oh, god,” I run my hands over my face. “I completely forgot you were going on tour with him again. Fuck!”

He sighs and comes to my side, “Y/n.”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do, Connor.” I sniffle.

“Come here,” he takes my hands from my face and wraps my arms around his torso. I let out a shuddery breath. “Hey, listen to me. It’s okay. We are going to get through this. You can tell him when you’re ready. And until then, I’m here. I’m here always. You know that.”

I sigh, “I’m scared.”

“You don’t have to be. I’ll help you. I’ll help you through everything. I mean it, you and I are in this together.”

“But it’s not your problem.”

“You are my problem,” he winces, “And yes, I know how bad that sounds. But… okay. Look at me,” he pulls away just far enough to see my face. “You don’t have to tell him yet. But you do have to tell him eventually. And when you tell him, I’ll be there right by your side. I’m not leaving you. Not now. Not ever. That baby,” he looks down at my stomach and then back to my eyes, “It’s gonna have you and me. I’m gonna be that really cool uncle the kid runs to when he’s in trouble.”

“You think I’m having a boy?” I ask, trying to lighten the mood because it’s already starting to get too emotional and I can’t handle it.

He takes that as his signal and smiles, pulling away from me. “I mean, I hope it is. That would be a fun time. I can teach him all the things I know. You know, how to be a lady killer, travel around the world and get thousands of girls screaming his name every night.”

“And if it’s a girl? What is Uncle Connor going to teach her?”

“That she’s not allowed to date until she’s at least thirty-five.”

It’s my turn to laugh. “Is that so?”

“Yeah, but either way, I’m teaching them about photography and video and surfing. That kid is going to be so loved, y/n. And they have me just like you do.”

I take in a deep breath. “Thank you,” I whisper.

---

“Connor, can you rub my back?” I ask, shifting on the couch, trying to find a better angle.

“Yeah, where?”

“Like right above the small of my back,” I reach my arm around myself to point and soon his warm hands meet my skin and I already feel relieved. “Oh, god. Thank you.”

“So, your doctor’s appointment is next week, right?”

I nod, “Yeah, Tuesday at three.”

“You want me to come with?”

“No.”

“Why not? I feel like I should be there when you find out what we’re having.”

I don’t correct him on the ‘we’ even though we both know this baby isn’t his. Which makes me think of the baby’s father and how I’m about to find out what we’re having and he still doesn’t even know that we’re having one. “Because you have to work. It’s the same time as your meeting with Shawn and the crew.”

He sighs, “You know I can tell him I’m out, if it makes you feel better about it.”

“No, Connor. We’ve talked about this. You’re not quitting because of me. You go and you do your job. It’s what you’re good at, and I am so proud of you.”

“Did he text you for the release?”

“Yeah,” I say quietly, remembering how I cried for an hour before I was able to text him back with a single ‘congratulations.’

“And?”

“And I listened to the rest of it... I hate that I love it.”

“You know it’s okay to miss him. Especially right now.”

“I know.” I pull away from him, playing with the hem of my shirt.

“You still haven’t told him.”

“I know,” I say again, deflating. “I will.”

“When?”

“I was thinking maybe in ten years?”

“Y/n,” he says with a stern look.

“Connor, please.”

“And what am I going to tell him when you call me telling me you’re in labor in six months.”

“We can handle it then.”

He shakes his head, “You know that’s not gonna work. You’ve got to tell him. And soon. It’s not just him it’ll effect. Karen, Manny, Aaliyah. They deserve to know too.”

I close my eyes. I hadn’t even thought about how it would affect them. “You’re right. Can we just? Wait another week? Know what I’m having first. And then I’ll tell him.”

“It’s already been four months… I guess a week won’t hurt.”

“Speaking of four months. I’ve been looking for a place, and I think I found one. It’s not too far from here and I mean, the rent is kinda a lot, but I think it’ll work.”

“Why are you looking for a place?”

I furrow my brows at him. “What do you mean? I have to move out at some point, Con. You know that?”

“Well, I mean, I guess. But you don’t have to move out right now. I like coming home to you. It’s nice. Familiar. Reminds me of the nights I’d spend at your house when we were kids. You know when your mom would make us those really rich chocolate chip cookies and we’d sneak them to your room before bed. But now it’s like that every night. Especially now that your cravings are starting.”

I smile softly, “Well I like coming home to you, too. But come on. You didn’t sign up for a baby. Plus, I’m not even paying rent. I’m sleeping in your guest room because I broke up with my boyfriend. This isn’t exactly the ideal living situation for you, bub.”

“Sure, but I don’t mind. I like having you here. And don’t think I haven’t noticed the random hundred and fifty dollars showing up in my wallet every time you get paid. Which by the way, I’m not spending.”

“Connor, I have to pay you back somehow.”

“No, you don’t. And I won’t tell you again. So anyway, the money isn’t being spent, but it is being put to good use. I started a college fund for the baby.”

“You what?”

“Yeah. Or I guess it could be used as bail money if it ever comes to that. But I don’t know. I just wanted to do something for them.”

“But why?”

“Because they’re part of you. Which means they’re part of me too.”

I can’t say anything. I don’t think anything will be good enough.

“So,” he says a while later. “We should start thinking about names.”

“Right now?”

“Yeah, I’ll start. If it’s a boy I think we should name him Connor.”

I chuckle, “No.”

“Come on, it’s a good name.”

“It’s your name.”

“Exactly.”

“No. Next.”

“Okay fine. What do you think then?”

“Brandon.”

“No. Too basic. How about Tanner?”

“No. Patrick?”

He shakes his head.

“Okay, well then let’s think girl names. Because, yes, that is a possibility.”

He sighs, “Girl names. Okay. You have anything in mind?”

“Rachel?”

“Eh, I’m not feeling it.”

“Okay, then how about Kendall?”

“How about Mae?”

Mae. “I like it.” Mae Mendes. Mendes. “Hey, Connor?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you think it’s okay if I give the baby Shawn’s last name?”

I don’t look at him when he answers, but I know him well enough to know he’s biting the inside of his cheek. “I think he’d like that very much.”

***

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[connordavidscamera]

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[flor3nces]

just a prank! | connor brashier x fem!reader :)

i turned on the small camera as it faced me.

i introduced the video and explained my plan, “okay so i’ve never pranked him before so i’m just going to see how this goes, i just need to make sure i don’t laugh or give it away,” i chuckled.

i hid the camera in a very covered area where he would never notice unless he was searching for it.

i laid on the sofa and shouted him into the living room.

“connor?”

“yeah,” he shouted from the top of the stairs.

“come here.”

i breathed deeply and tried to think of something sad as he walked towards me, i really gotta turn on my acting skills.

“yeah hunny?” he asked as he plopped himself on top of my body.

“connor get up, i want you to take this seriously,” i said without laughing. so far so good.

“what? what’s wrong?” he said now concerned.

“promise you won’t shout at me?”

“what? yeah yeah, i promise,” he said holding up his pinky. precious baby, this is gunna be hard.

i interlocked mine with his then dropped my hand, his following as they stayed connected.

“i-i think we should see other people.”

his face dropped and i could tell i caught him off guard.

“what? baby, what do you mean?”

“it’s just, i don’t know. i don’t feel the same spark that was there from the start.”

his eyes glossed over, “why? i do,” he said making my heart shatter for him. i just wanted to tell him it was a prank and give him the biggest hug ever and tell him how much i love him.

but it’s just a prank, so i can’t.

“i just- i don’t see you in my future,” i cringed at my words here i am telling this man he means nothing to me anymore when he literally means everything to me. he isn’t just a part of my future, he is my future.

i saw a few single tears spill but he was quick to lift his hand and wipe them away.

“what did i do wrong? i’ll change i promise, just tell me what i did,” he said in a panicky tone. he sounded desperate for an answer.

“connor you didn’t do anything, it’s not your fault. i’m just not in love with you anymore.”

that set him off.

silent sobs escaped his lips as his eyes closed, in hope to prevent any more tears falling.

“i don’t get it,” he mumbled through his sobs.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t mean for you to be so upset.”

instead of a reply, all i got was more and more cries coming from him.

i realized that it had gone on to far and decided to tell him. i couldn’t continue breaking him down.

i grabbed his cheeks and looked into his bloodshot, tear filled eyes.

“my love, it’s a prank. i still love you.” i told him, kissing him repeatedly.

“really?” he asked, genuinely quite shocked.

damn. i must be a good ass actress.

“yes connor,” i laughed at his relieved tone.

“wait, so you still love me?” he asked, sounding a little nervous for his answer.

“oh my god, of course i do hun,” you squished his cheeks and kissed his lips once more.

he let out a small sigh.

“where’s the camera?” he asked, laughing softly.

i pointed to the desk where it was hidden.

connor stood up and walked towards it. he picked it up and faced it towards him.

“everyone unsubscribe to y/n-“

i let out a laugh.

“oh my god, shut up connor!”

[softiecaro]

I am really wanting one where you go on vacation with Connor and you just have a amazing time and ahhhh

ROAD TRIP

Anon, I don't know if this was really what you had in mind, but I hope you like it 😢

Summary: You go on vacation with your group of friends (Connor, Alessia, Brian, Shawn, Sam and Camila). None of your friends know about your crush on Connor B, except Alessia, who is your childhood friend and also your neighbor.

Warnings: English is not my native language so I apologize if there are mistakes.

A/N: Sorry, I'm a fan of friends to lovers stories, I hope you are too.

"Ok, we'll pick up your boyfriend and Sam first." Alessia exclaims, glancing at me as she drives.

"He is not my boyfriend". I join in my seat.

"But you wish." I just ignore her. "If you don't make a move, then I'll do it myself."

As soon as we reach our first destination, Alessia honks the truck's horn countless times until the two boys leave.

Connor wears tight black pants with a black sweatshirt. On his head he wears a moss green cap that highlights his light blue eyes. Does it come in slow motion or is it just my imagination? I try to look away, but it's not until they are three feet apart that I force myself to do so.

He smiles at us and I feel my heart in my throat. Calm down Y / N, I say to myself.

"Hey" Both boys say hello at the same time.

Now we went to look for the others, and on the way I just hummed the songs from the radio "Hey guys, good morning." I hear my favorite boy as soon as we reach our second destination. Camila, Brian and Shawn get on. Unconsciously I glance at the rear view mirror finding Connor's calm face smiling at our friends. Apparently he felt my gaze so the blue-eyed man looks at the rearview mirror and smiles at me, I quickly look away and bite my lip nervously.

We are now heading to the supermarket in search of food for our trip.

"Ok guys, this will be quick. We will break up into groups. Camila, Shawn and Connor to the drinks." The trio grabs a cart and goes away, quickly disappearing from view. "Brian and Sam go get the treats, very important, indispensable."

When the three of them walk away, Less begins to walk and I keep up with her without saying a word. After wandering through various corridors and pulling out a few things, she speaks.

"That's it baby, come on." She announces and then we walk to the cash registees. It only takes a couple of minutes for the others to come to our side so that we could pay for everything.

We finish paying and I take one of the bags.

"Hey, I'll take it." I jerk my head around and look at Connor, who takes the bag from my hands, causing the two to touch and causing an electric current.

"Don't worry, I can do it alone." I whisper embarrassed.

"Anyway". He tells me back.

When we arrive, we quickly put things in the trunk and then I feel like a hand is placed on my back pushing me into the truck.

"Get up quickly, get up." Brian is the one who pushes me roughly, making me sit in the last row of seats, Connor follows me.

"There is no need to be such a brusque buddie." He exclaims, scowling but at the same time amused.

"I'm sorry." Brian apologizes in a tone of voice much higher than he normally speaks, while giving us a smile from ear to ear.

Sam, Brian and Alessia are sitting in the middle row of seats. The last one passed the keys to Shawn to be the pilot and Camila at her side as co-pilot.

For the first few minutes of the trip, Mila tunes the radio very low.

Beside me, I feel like the blue-eyed man takes something out of her pocket. I glance sideways to my right and watch as he puts his phone on his lap and then tries to untangle a pair of headphones. I turn my head and seeing his frustrated face, it's impossible not to let out a small laugh.

"What?" He ask with a sideways smile without showing teeth. "You are laughing at me?"

I quickly shake my head turning my gaze forward.

"Hey, Y / N" I turn my gaze to him, who offers me one of the headphones. I stare at the object for a few seconds, hesitating, but finally I receive it and put it to my ear.

"Thank you." I mumble and then the melodious voice of Elvis Presley to the song Can't falling in love reaches my ears.

I glance sideways at Connor, who closes his eyes while shaking his head gently, enjoying the song. I panic when I see his head come up to me until it rests on my shoulder.

His closeness makes me nervous and unconsciously I begin to move my legs restlessly, causing our knees to rub. He opens his eyes, wondering with his eyes if something was wrong and I answer him by shaking my head as gently as possible.

He puts his head back on my shoulder and I feel like my eyes are closing until I fall asleep. Then, what seems like 20 minutes later, the background music from the truck makes my eyes pop open.

"I hope you know I'm for the takin '. You know this cookie is for the baking. Kitty, kitty, baby give that thing some rest." They all sing along to Rihana's Wild Thoughts.

"Guys, I need to go to the bathroom" Alessia's voice interrupts the "little" karaoke that had been put together. "Urgent"

"Ok Less, we'll stop at the next gas station." Shawn tells him kindly, how it is so typical of him.

✨

A/N: I know, this is very short. I want to turn it into a miniseries. What would you think? By the way, sorry for my English :( again.

[2000sbitch]

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐫 𝐁𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐞𝐫

(𝐬) 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 / (𝐟) 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟 / (𝐚) 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭

𝘔𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘺'𝘴 𝘉𝘰𝘺  (𝐟)

- - - -

𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

[mikrowrites]

Boats, Best Friends, and Burgers

Shawn Mendes x Reader

A girl with walls up against boys meets a boy at a party who whisks her into his world. Maybe love isn’t a distraction after all.

Y/N never considered herself naive nor trusting. She prided herself on how she kept to herself and protected her heart, unlike her college roommate or her friends who would throw themselves at boys when they do much as smiled or grasped their hand. No, Y/N would not destroy herself like that.

She had college, a tiring feat that would absolutely be even more deteriorated with the addition of a boyfriend, and Y/N liked being by herself, it gave her a peace and quiet without obligations. Y/N did not need the distraction of a relationship at all.

But that damn boat party changed everything.

“Y/N!” Connor shouted through the kitchen, his voice laced with despiration and a hint of whining. “You can’t just rot away in your apartment forever!”

“Mmm, I can and will.” Y/N lashed back, taking another drink from her bottle of Gatorade. She and Connor had been friends since Pre-K, the boy seemingly insisting on filling some big brother role (ironic, since Y/N was two months older than him). “You know I don’t do parties.”

Connor scoffed, shaking his head. “It wouldn’t kill you to do one! I’m only back in LA for a week before tour starts again, I want to spend time with my best friend.”

“You can. With pizza. And a movie. On the couch. Not on some boat out on the bay with hormone-ridden girls and boys reeking of testosterone.” Y/N reasoned, Connor grasping Y/N’s arms.

“Please. Just this one party. We go for an hour, and if you want to leave we’ll leave.” He begged.

Y/N let out a flamboyant groan, pouting her lips. “Fine! Fine. One hour.”

Connor let out a whoop, throwing his fists in the air. Y/N shook her head, hoping she’d suddenly contract a case of tuberculosis or the bubonic plague, both of which, in her opinion, would be a far more pleasant ordeal than that party.

Hours later Connor dragged Y/N onto the boat, the loud music and squealing of drunken girls flooding her senses. She turned to Connor about to beg if they could leave, but he gave her a rather pointed look, silencing that suggestion.

Y/N was definitely not dressed for the occasion. Boys dressed in the ugliest Hawaiian shirts and swim trunks, girls in tiny skirts and booty shorts with crop tops or bikinis. Y/N merely wore a pair of bermuda shorts and a John Mayer concert shirt from the summer.

Y/N slowly pushed through the crowd with her extroverted best friend, Connor shouting out and walking over to some friends. Y/N looked around, the ideas of Jell-O shots and grinding circles quickly becoming rather unappealing to her.

She soon caught sight of paradise! Alas! A island amongst the turbulent throng of sexual desires and rising blood sugar. An empty corner, back at the end of the boat. Y/N made a beeline there, humming with satisfaction as she was separated from the rioting mess.

Y/N leaned her elbows on the railing and looked out at the pinkish sunset over the city, closing her eyes and inhaling the salty breeze.

“Oh, shit.”

Her eyes snapped open and Y/N turned, seeing a tall curly haired boy standing a few feet from her. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t see this corner was taken.”

Y/N nodded. “Yup. I’ve been here fifteen minutes and I’m pretty sure by the twenty mark I might start twerking or doing body shots off the lifeguard.”

The boy laughed, his fingers figeting nervously. “Not if I beat you to suddenly ripping my shirt off and seducing five girls at once.”

It was Y/N’s turn to laugh, her mind sending off sirens and screaming RUN AWAY! but she just couldn’t.

“I’d rather jump first.” She sighed.

“Oh God, me too. I’m so sick of these people.” He gasped out, leaning on the railing next to her. “One more girl pulls at my hair again and I’m going to have a mental breakdown buzz cut.”

Y/N smiled, holding out her hand. “Y/N.”

“Shawn.” He grinned, encasing Y/N’s hand in his giant one, shaking it firmly. “Nice to have someone who has a BAC of 0.0.”

“Maybe not. Perhaps they sweat it all off and it fumes. Maybe it’s like a second hand high, we’re just second hand drunk.” Y/N mused.

“Maybe.” Shawn agreed. “How’d you even get here? If you mind me asking, since you obviously don’t want to be here.”

Y/N let out a scoff of laughter. “My idiot best friend. He dragged me here out of guilt. He travels a lot, we don’t see each other much. You?”

“Friend as well. I’m traveling a lot too, said we needed to “wind down” I guess. Fucking Brashier...” Shawn muttered.

Y/N turned to Shawn, raising her eyebrows. “Brashier? Did you say Brashier?”

“Yeah. Why?” Shawn questioned.

“Oh my gosh...” Y/N laughed. “Connor dragged you here too.”

Shawn stared at her in confusion for a moment before bursting into laughter. “No way! You’re THE Y/N! Connor talks about you all the time!”

“Only good things I suppose.” Y/N responded.

Shawn shrugged, Y/N laughing and slapping him lightly on the arm. “That must make you Shawn Mendes, international pop superstar. Very impressive.”

He smiled, leaning back against the railing. “I guess I am. And you’re the Y/N who fell of a two story roof.”

“He did not—I gonna kill him!” Y/N gasped, the two laughing.

The night drifted on, the sky dark and glistening with stars as the two talked for hours. Y/N remembered clearly writing her number on his wrist before Connor took her home, herself wanting to slap the smug grin off the boy’s face.

Texts with Shawn became phone calls and FaceTimes, and soon dates. Y/N was tripping and falling so fucking deep for him. They stayed in contact during his European tour, him practically begging her to come with him on his North American tour. “You’re my anchor!” He exclaimed over the phone, Y/N blushing insanely. “You keep me grounded.”

So the playful shoves became the interlacing of hands, the smack talk over games of Mariokart became sweet pecks on cheeks. Y/N took a gap year off to follow him across the continent, because if he had breaken down the walls she spent so long building he was worth it.

The North American tour had wrapped up after many months, Y/N and Shawn enjoying lunch together before he had to leave for Asia. They devoured their burgers, laughing and talking while they basked in the time they had left.

Y/N had just finished her pickle-ketchup-cheddar burger when Shawn smiled up at her.

“Y/N L/N, I think I’m in love with you.”

Y/N looked up in surprise, Shawn leaning over the table with a smile. “Y/N, I know I am in love with you. And I need you to know it.”

She felt her heart race, a grin gracing her features. “Shawn Mendes, you somehow got me to love you too. No other man can boast as much.”

He smiled so bright grasping her hand as he leaned over the table, running his fingers through her hair as he connected his lips with hers.

Y/N deepened into the kiss, wanting nothing more but to melt into him and never end the sweet euphoria clouding her brain.

But, with the disdain of suffocation, they pulled away gasping for air. Y/N leaned her forehead against his.

Shawn laughed. “Boats, best friends, and burgers.”

“Best way into a girl’s heart.” Y/N whispered, grinning before grabbing either side of his face and crashing her lips against his again.