#darth sidious

[mabsart]

Finished reading Darth Plagueis and this was my one takeaway:

Baby!Maul is strong! 🥺✨✨

Original Meme under the cut

[adragonsfriend]

It's always "the Jedi failed at this," "Anakin should've done that," and never "Darth Sidious is so good at his job, he deserves to get Sith Lord of the month."

[raphaerolo]

Zack and Cody (2005)

[stagbeetleboy]

He is bugs

Puffy sleeves and blues Senator Palpatine is matching the Euops genus of leaf-rolling weevils

Camarotus singularis and the chancellor’s spectacular sleeves

What in the world? Frog legged beetle Sagra Fulgida.

The Emperor is a pale imitation of the humble stag beetle. Lucanus Cervus.

What a brilliant color! Agrypnus agrillaceus.

[acrowbyanyothername]

so far this comic has only had negative reviews. maybe it is more cursed than I originally believed

[phantasm-echo]

Cue Exit Music (for a Film) by Radiohead

RIP fives you will be dearly missed (whether you come back from the dead to become an inquisitor or not)

+ doodles to lighten the mood ig

[ventresses]

Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith (7/?) - Mustafar, part 1

Star Wars + Text Posts & Headlines

[phoenixkaptain]

I love it when pre Original Trilogy era shows how much effort went into making the Death Star. It took decades, literal decades, and it took so much money and so many people and it was such a secretive thing and it’s staffed by millions because it’s the size of a small moon.

I cannot express how much all of the added information makes it so much funnier that Luke blew it up.

Luke destroys literally everything Palpatine built. He blows up the Death Star, which was referenced in universe as early as the second movie. He blew up the weapon of mass destruction twenty years in the making. And he blew it up pretty much directly after it’s first and only successful attack. It was operational for fifteen minutes, fifteen minutes that Palpatine had the thing he’d been building for longer than Luke has been alive, and Luke blows it up. First day retirement, but first hour retirement.

Luke convinces Darth Vader to turn back to the light side, a feat thought literally impossible by literally everybody. Sidious clearly doesn’t see Vader’s betrayal coming. Vader’s betrayal was not in his plans, nor was it something he was prepared for. Sidious is a powerful Force user with all four limbs while Vader is a man in the tin can Palpatine put him in. If Palpatine had seen Vader turning coming, he would not have allowed it to happen.

Luke literally should not even be alive. Palpatine almost definitely got Padme out of the way on purpose, and he almost certainly was trying for her unborn child as well (there was way too big of a risk that a cute liddol bebe would bring some humanity back to Anakin, and Palpatine did not want Anakin to have any humanity) Luke living is literally the first step in Palpatine’s ultimate downfall, especially once Vader finds out that Luke is his son. His very alive son. His son that is not dead, despite Palpatine claiming Anakin killed Padme. Implying that Anakin killed Padme and she posthumously gave birth. But, she didn’t give birth on Mustafar, which was the last place Anakin interacted with her. And once the mother dies, you have to get those fuckers out fast or they die too.

I imagine Darth Vader piecing all of this together is that meme with all the math floating around his head, because how could Padme have died by his hand and then given birth like two hours later?

Luke killing Palpatine is what ultimately leads to the dissolution of the Empire as an omnipotent entity. Luke killed the Empire. Luke spends a good amount of his adult life killing Empire remnants. We see that in the Mandalorian, since he’s so recognizable that Gideon immediately knows he’s fucked just by seeing an X-wing. We read it in Legends’ continuity, where Luke terrifies Imperials because he can walk into their changing room and stand in their for a minute and they don’t even notice.

Luke destroyed Palpatine’s life’s work. Everything Palpatine spent his whole life working towards, and Luke kills all of it. He blows up not one, but two Death Stars (he may not have pulled the trigger on the second Death Star, but without him, it never would have been destroyed). He convinces not one, but multiple Sith and Dark Jedi to return from the Dark Side. He is the only reason that Obi-Wan Kenobi, the biggest pain in Palpatine’s ass ever born, lives long enough to make it to the Death Star.

Palpatine went through so much effort. And just when he had finally won, when he finally had a weapon capable of destroying entire planets with a single blast, making it impossible for any planets or peoples to go against him, Luke shows up nineteen years late to the Jedi party with space Starbucks and a droid twice his age and almost singlehandedly destroys everything Palpatine ever had a hand in creating.

Luke manages to become even worse than Obi-Wan Kenobi, the ultimate thorn in the side of politicians, and Luke doesn’t even understand any politics. He wasn’t trained in diplomacy like Obi-Wan and Leia, no, he’s a farmboy who left home for the first time in his entire life, just this morning. And he is the one to destroy the Empire.

If they rewrote Star Wars and had it entirely from Palpatine’s perspective, Luke Skywalker would be his greatest foe. Luke Skywalker would be the final boss. Luke Skywalker is the antithesis of everything Palpatine believes in and he is the one character that Palpatine cannot predict. He isn’t as moldable as Anakin, he doesn’t respond to threats very well, he’s apparently impossible to kill via Force lightning (still the funniest scene of all times, the progression of Palpatine’s face falling and him looking like “what the fuck??? Is this kid rubber??? I’ve electrocuted him eight times???”), his unwavering faith in his father’s goodness makes Darth Vader want to be a better person, Luke Skywalker is the big bad of Palpatine’s story and—

There is nothing in this world that is funnier than someone’s biggest antagonist being Luke fucking Skywalker. Luke Skywalker, who saved the galaxy with the power of love and who shouldn’t exist, by Jedi rules and by Palpatine’s own attempts, and whose best friends are literally droids, which Palpatine canonically hates!

Everything about this is hilarious, this is the funniest thing in all of media, Palpatine loses absolutely everything to some backwater farmboy who fucking likes droids.

[istaricelebelasse]

An AU where Maul kills Sidious on Mandalore, causing new problems for everyone including, but not limited to:

The Chancellor of the Republic being murdered on a neutral planet

Dooku and Maul arguing over who is the True Sith

Mandalore being Mandalore aka trapped in a civil war, fending off the republic, and also hosting a Sith Lord on a Victory Rush

Sidious’ plans unravelling in new and fun ways as things are unwittingly (or deliberately) set off

Maul, on his Victory Rush, continuing to plot his revenge on Obi-Wan

[questforgalas]

Palpatine: We’re going to leak that an assassination attempt on me is planned. The Jedi will try to infiltrate the bounty hunters, and we’ll trap them by hosting a bounty hunter contest to determine the assassination team and THEN if the Jedi is still alive, we’ll frame them for the whole thing

Dooku pouring his 3rd glass of wine at 9am: Please for the love of the force can we just reveal ourselves already

[trashy1turtle]

Absolutely

[sk0rbut]

if my parents had named me sheev i’d be evil too honestly

this is just what happens when you don’t pay your workers the fact that your boss was a sith is just a lucky coincidence

[shapelytimber]

I'm in the mood to sketch rn :) so here is a recap of my star wars sapphic au <3

And the lineup !

[COMMISSIONS]

But now, I would love some opinions on who should I add next soooo

Little pitch for each potential new character below vvv

Lando : I think making her a high femme mayor/pilot can be hot af lfkgkfk

I love Lando's character and design, and even tho I don't plan on keeping the mustache (a tragedy I know), I do have some ideas for a feminine version.

She's living the high life until her kinda failure of an ex comes crawling back to her with demands and a new gf :) too bad she already made a deal with Vader

Piett : middle aged stressed navy woman in uniform (even tho it's the kinda ugly imperial uniform fifkfkfk).

Piett is one of my absolute favorite sw characters ! So thank you fanon, you made something really cool for this one <3

And I adore his friendship with Veers, so they might be a muscle woman also in uniform if you pick his option ;)

Boba Fett : post sarlacc digestion butch booba fett. She's old, she's bald, and she will break your jaw <3

Also dykes on (hover) bikes :)))

PS : as always, the Palpatine and Dooku designs were originally made by Stagbeetleboy, so these are his designs

PPS : I drew Padmé in my favorite outfit of hers, and even tho she wore it in star wars 1 she isn't 14 here itjkff hope I didn't have to specify that but better safe then sorry- she's in her late twenties early thirties

[captainsamta]

On paper, after years

[stagbeetleboy]

The people’s princess

[charmwasjess]

Lightsaber Theory: Obi-Wan "Sith Lords are Our Specialty" Kenobi consistently loses duels to Dooku not for any reason of technical form mismatch or lack of ability, but because Dooku is not even pretending to try to kill him. Resultantly, Obi-Wan can’t figure out what the fuck is going on when they fight. 

Obi-Wan: (preparing to defend an expected lethal strike) You’ll answer for your enormities, Count!

Dooku: (giving him the lightest love tap on the leg) Don’t be so sure, my special good lineage baby boy, so perfect in my eyes. 

Obi-Wan: …What?

Dooku: What?

Which Dooku and Obi-Wan proud lineage moment is even the most unhinged? There are so many to choose from! Is it Dooku’s frequent inability, both in AotC and TCW, to keep from spontaneously gushing about Sidious’s plans and even his own dark secrets to Obi-Wan?? Is it the time in Labyrinth of Evil where Dooku drags a long-suffering, bored Grievous over to watch a holorecording of Anakin and Obi-Wan thwarting his plans yet again, to point out how beautifully they’re working together as a team and how much he likes watching their lightsaber work evolve? Is it in the recent Brotherhood novel, where Obi-Wan just has to casually namedrop Qui-Gon to get Dooku to do exactly what he wants?

Obi-Wan is a big problem for Sidious in his mission to destabilize and corrupt Anakin, and Sidious knows it. He needs him out of the picture to do the same isolating, evil bullshit that worked so well when ensnaring Dooku himself. But the war has been going on for years now, and guess who remains inconveniently alive? And whose job was that to take care of? Oh yeah. I remember. His useless, Padawan assassin-collecting apprentice: fucking Count Dooku. By the time of RotS, Sidious has specifically ordered Dooku to make fucking sure Obi-Wan is dead only for him to completely ignore the command about a half-dozen times.

Going by the Stover RotS novelization, in the same scene where Dooku also literally refers to Obi-Wan as his fucking grandson actually, add that to our earlier list, Sidious reiterates that KILL OBI-WAN is the plan (over the sound of Dooku’s loud complaining) moments before that final duel.  I kind of wish we’d gotten a shot of Sidious's incredulous, enraged expression as Dooku knocks Obi-Wan unconscious and pins him safely out of the way. He is, once again, going out of his way to not kill Obi-Wan in that duel, and this time directly disobeying his Master to his face after they just had a conversation about it. You just know exactly what Sidious must be thinking at that moment. Oh, Dooku. You are so fucking fired.