#dc headcanon

[bug-bites]

batfam beach episode?? real not clickbait no glue no borax??

cw: nothing! pure vacation beach fluff (p≧w≦q) also barely proofread,,,

pairing: gn!reader x batfam (NOT ALL AT ONCE.)

characters: dick grayson, jason babygirl todd, cassandra cain, tim drake, damian wayne (all intended to be interpreted as either romantic or platonic unless its damian. ik in some comic runs he's like an adult but hes like permanently 12 in my head and i dont fw that :/)

a/n: im back with a new dc obsession tee hee (soz to everyone who wanted more abt the cod guys or spiderverse im comicsmaxxing and redhoodpilled) will probably make a part 2 w/ bruce, babs, steph, and duke eventually :3c

Dick Grayson haha dick

oh he loves the beach so much

the sand beneath his feet make him feel nostalgic from when he would practice tumbling with his parents in the circus ring i think there's sand in circus rings right? I dunno someone fact check me on that one

the victim of being buried in the sand, always asks for a mermaid tail but ends up with something like massive sand tits (courtesy of either tim or jason), he laughs it off anyways

somehow gets the worst tan lines. He wore a swim shirt one time and never again because the tan lines looked SO BAD which is a total shame because he tans gorgeously

will beg to do play shoulder wars i have no clue if this is the right name, again fact check me for this thing where you get a piggyback ride from someone and you try to knock someone whos also getting a piggyback ride over in the water

you’re on his shoulders since bro is strong asf and you square up against tim and damian

obviously you lose because hello that's damian wayne we are talking about but at least its fun!!

cass and jason are forever the undefeated champions of shoulder wars though, that goes without saying

Cassandra Cain

shes always seen beach episodes in animes that damian practically dragged her into watching so when she gets to actually go to a beach she is so excited peak sibling bonding is dragging your siblings into your interests

loves building sandcastles and writing things in the sand, watching it get washed away, and then do it all over again

hold her hand and jump over waves together on the shore and she will be the giggliest and happiest human being alive on planet earth

but out of all the beach activities she loves beach volleyball

shes actually scarily good at beach volleyball for someone who has never played volleyball before

dick thought it would be fun to teach her and have a friendly match between him and bruce vs you and cass

yeah bruce and dick were COOKED. huffing and puffing like they have a vendetta against the three little pigs at the end of it while cass is like “this is so fun, lets go again!”

ends the day with a little sunset stroll along the shore i need her so bad you do not understand please bbyg ill treat u soooo well

Jason Todd

beaches are fun on paper for him, in person not so much

PERSONAL HC INCOMING! He gets migraines after the lazarus pit so he can only have so much fun before needing to lie face down with his head covered with a beach towel to make everything less overwhelming or he wears sunglasses the entire time

he brings a book to read at the beach and stays in the shade the entire time yes he is that bitch

usually at home in the comfort of his little library he likes to read things that have an impact on him or just stuff that makes him want to analyze deeper. think books like frankenstein, lord of the flies, all quiet on the western front, just generally heavier stuff

but his vacation books? totally different. usually something super light, maybe a shitty romance book that you find in walmart which are clearly just results of book packaging, or a some booktok recommendation he got for shits and giggles because it just was so laughably bad, maybe even a childhood feel-good book like percy jackson or the little prince (mostly just books he would not grieve over if sand permanently got in between the pages)

he tried reading a colleen hoover book once and honest to God wanted to toss it into the ocean HE WOULD HATE HER BOOKS AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

but out of everything he likes watching you enjoy yourself, his book wasnt that important anyways. show him that funky sand dollar you found or that really cool piece of seaglass, he’s probably gonna bring it home with him. a little keepsake along with the millions of grains of sand that never seem to go away

Tim Drake

Burns so easily

At first its kinda cute, like hes asking you to help him get that spot on his back he just cant seem to reach and its just a little sweet moment between you two as you rub the sunscreen into his sore muscles

But then it happens again. And again. And again to the point when he goes up to you, you automatically reach for the tube of SPF 100+ 

I just know his vitamin d deficiency goes crazy

Leaves the beach looking like a lobster, sunburnt, a crazy bump on his head from getting hit with a volleyball, and some god awful sunglasses tan lines

Overall, beach activities are not really his thing bros job is NAWT beach

Enjoys the boardwalk a lot more than the beach itself, likes the touristy stuff but still goes to the beach because dick loves it and he loves his older brother :(

Damian Wayne

i feel like he wouldn’t care too much for typical beach stuff. like at every beach that has sand and decently clean water you can do most beach activities

one thing that is never 100% consistent at all beaches is what lives on the beaches. this boy will spend hours staring into tidepools 

bruce was lowk concerned because his son did not gaf about normal beach activities that kids do but eventually he reached a point where he was like "i mean at least hes having fun and being safe"

i feel like talia would always show him books of sea creatures when he was little but he never ended up being able to see them in their natural habitat someone take this boy to an aquarium now

tells you fun facts about each creature you come across

will scold you if you take a shell from the beach, definitely says some shit like “how would you feel if someone ran into your house and just took your bed?”  based though, leave shells at the beach yall! taking them is like bad for the ecosystem

brings his notebook around and has little sketches of the sea creatures

even though typical beach activities arent his favourite, he doesnt hate it. he likes that he can catch a break from all the vigilante stuff and spend time with his family as a family and not just as a team

loves scuba diving. idk it just somehow makes sense and i think he would look really stupid in a wet suit

also i feel like he would never mention it but in his mind hes fully thinking "this is just like a beach episode" but he would rather die than say it out loud FUCKING NERDDD

[definitelysome1]

A favourite headcanon of mine:

Some rando: your brother is super weird!

Dick: my brother is autistic, and you’re being ableist!

Tim: what? I’m not autistic what’re you talking about?

Dick: yes you are?

Tim: no I’m not.

Dick: Tim, it’s in your medical file.

Tim: but I’ve never been tested!?

Dick: yes you have, I was there!

Tim: when was this??

Dick: like three years ago? I said “hey Tim, I think you might be dealing with some mental disorder” and you said “ok Dick” and then I said “can I take you to the doctor to get tested” and you said “sure Dick”!

Tim: oh! So that’s why the doctor was asking weird questions… I didn’t listen when you asked about the doctor, so I just thought it was a normal visit.

Dick: how are you so smart, yet so dumb?

Tim: idk 🤷‍♂️

[therandomfandomme]

why do i imagine the batfam finally meeting the league and then one of them going 'how the fuck do you have so many kids?' and little shit Jason goes 'well, when two people love each other very much...' and because Bruce doesn't wanna listen to this, he tiredly reminds Jason: 'you're adopted' which naturally means that Jason is going to dramatically pretend that this is the first time he's heard that and how could Bruce keep this from him, much to the horror of the league and the exasperation of Bruce

[file808]

I have a head cannon that non of the batboys favorite superhero is batman, but they don't know that he isn't Tim and Damians favorite.

---‐----------------------------------------------------

Jason or the most loyal Wonder Woman fan: Dick I can't believe that you're a Superman fan

Dick an superman fan: Hey at least I'm better than him. *Points to Damian*

Damian: Tt I'll have you know that I'm an avid fan of Black Canary. Father is not my favorite hero unlike somebody. *Glares at Tim*

Tim: You know that Batman's not my favorite hero right?

Dick genuinely shocked: WAIT WHAT!?!?

Jason: Yah Tim, Damian makes sense but you??? You have been such a Batman fan sense the beginning.

Tim: Like a year after becoming Robin Batman stopped being my favorite. Why is this such a surprise?

Damian: So Drake who's your favorite now?

Tim: Green Lantern!

Dick: Which one? There's a whole Corp of them.

Tim: ...

Jason: Tim...which one??

Tim:*Sigh* Hal Jordan.

Bruce in the distance: REALLY HAL JORDAN?!!!?!!

[superbat-love]

Clark: [stares at Ace] Is that what I think it is?

Bruce: Oh, that’s Chewperman, Ace’s favorite chew toy.

Clark: You let Ace chew on a mini me?

Bruce: That’s what it’s made for. If it makes you feel bad, I’ll make one for Krypto too. He’ll love it, right boy?

Ace: Woof.

The following week at the Fortress of Solitude…

Bruce: Why is this toy kept behind a glass casing? It’s meant for Krypto. [takes it out of the casing and tosses it to Krypto] Here boy!

Krypto: [happily chomps on the Batman chew toy]

Clark: Noooo! Don’t! Krypto, let go of Batsqueak!

Bruce: Batsqueak?

Clark: It just feels wrong, Bruce! I can’t bear to let any harm come to Batsqueak. He should be kept safe in his ice cave, not mauled by giant fangs.

Bruce: …

[smallandangry24]

AU where Bruce gets the baby bats as baby bats: Jason’s first word being “icky” but he’s not eating anything, he’s pointing at Dick

[yesiknowimshort]

to keep up appearances, bruce asked the batkids to find reasons to excuse their various bumps and bruises:

dick was easy. gymnastics and acrobatics run deep within his veins and it’s always his “party trick”, so they just let the public come up with an answer themselves.

jason, mysterious as he is, never addressed his bumps and bruises. the public have settled on underground cage fighting.

tim’s was skateboarding and being “himself”. tim knows how he appears to the public, and as much as it pains his ego for people to see him in such a way, clumsiness fit his charming, dorky, public persona.

damian needs no excuse as he is a ‘rambunctious little ankle biter’, so bruce just lets damian straight up tell people shit like “i was engaged in battle with a duel wielding madman” and then says “kids and their wild imaginations, amiright?”.

steph insisted on fencing even though bruce argued that she would not realistically get many black eyes from fencing. she just tells people she’s very bad at it.

cass’ are from ballet duets.

duke just says “there was a spider” with no further context.

harper’s go to line is “you should see the other guy”.

and bruce is basically barbie so he comes up with a new sport each time he’s asked. and people believe it every goddamn time without question; because what else would a billionaire do with their time other than unicycle hockey and chess boxing?

[terrywho-cartoons]

Dick was a normal name in the 1950’s, but it’s 2022 now, so here’s how I immagine all of the batkids (+ some extras) reacting to Dick introducing himself.

BABS (10 years old)

Dick: My name’s dick

Babs: That’s a bad word.

Dick: No? It’s my name?

Babs: Daddy says it’s naughty to say bad words.

Dick: But it’s my name?

Babs: I’m gonna go ask daddy *runs up to commissioner Gordon* daddy, that kid says his name is Dick, can I say it when I’m talking about him?

Dick: *the son of immigrant parents, grown up speaking an amalgamation of Easter European dialects and was names after Dick Tracy still confused as to why his name is a bad word*

***

Jason

Dick: Hey buddy, I know this is all very new but my name is Dick and I—

Jason: hold up, hold up. Dick?

Dick: yeah, I know, I know but —

Jason: Damn and I thought my parents were assholes.

***

Tim

This little stalker already knew Dick’s entire biography, so there wasn’t a reaction, bless him.

***

Damian

He was brought up by assassins, also no particular reaction.

***

Steph

Dick: nice to meet you Stephanie, my name’s Dick.

Steph: you said Dick?

Dick: short for Richard, yes.

Steph: Nice. *nods*

***

Cass (Cass uses sign language because I said so)

Dick: *finger spells D I C K*

Cass: *there’s a sign for that*

Dick: yeah but we ain’t gonna use it, kiddo.

***

Wally (13 years old)

Dick: it’s so cool to meet other sidekicks! I’m Dick.

Wally: as in your name is Dick?

Dick: Yes *blushing because now he knows why everyone is reacting like it’s strange*

Wally: Ok from now on I’m gonna be the one to introduce you to anyone we meet, deal? Oh you’ll see man it’ll be so much fun *proceeds to list out all of the ways they could sneak dick jokes into conversations*

***

Roy

Wally: Roy, I have the pressure to introduce you to my Dick.

Roy: what the fuck do you mean now!?

Dick: *quadruple flips over Wally and lands in between them* ta-da!!!

Roy: who’s the kid?

Wally *placing an hand on Dick’s shoulder*: this, is my Dick

Roy: that’s your actual name?

Dick: it is.

Roy *looking between the other two*: ok I want in on your plans to introduce him to the others

————

This is all I could come up with but feel free to add more!!

[goodoldfashionedengineer]

I think it is extremely funny how New Jersey, the state Gotham is located in, is the only state where it's illegal to pump your own gas.

Apparently it's "Because of the fire hazards directly associated with dispensing fuel[...]"

Any Gothamite would be shaking their head at this.

They are used to attacks on Gotham by rogues on a daily basis. Just living in that city puts them at risk for dying in a gruesome way. Fear toxin, Joker Gas, getting frozen in ice, you name it.

But they aren't trusted to pump their own gas?

And the poor gas station attendants.

I bet they judge the supervillains based on how they treat service workers.

You stand at the gas station and Red Hood rolls up?

Yeah, they know him. He's nice. Yeah, they know how he opperates, so what? He bitched with Freya about her ex when they'd just broken up. He gave Alex a good tip when he'd mentioned how he had to work on his birthday.

[bizbat]

When They're In Love HCS - Jason Todd

~ Fem terms used for reader

~ Partially based on these headcanons

🕸️Spiderverse Masterlist🕸️

🐼JJK Masterlist🐼

~ You can find part two here, and part three here.

~ You can find more of my works here

Jason Todd seems like the type to fall hard and fast. He might not admit it for a while, but he's been developing feelings for you from at least the second or third time you met.

He's the type to call you "Wifey" or "The Missus" even when you aren't married and regardless of whether or not you to plan to.

He absolutely keeps a picture or two of you in his wallet, and no, he doesn't think it's cheesy in the slightest.

He's the type to lay on you. Your chest, your tummy, even your butt if you're laying on your stomach, your size and weight is irrelevant.

You'll be minding your own business, laying down and reading a book or playing on your phone, and he'll come out of nowhere and drop all 230+ lbs of muscle on your smaller body.

If you wheeze and try to crawl out from under him, try to push his giant hulking form off of you, he'll just wrap his arms around you and tell you he's tired, and just needs a few minutes of sleep.

Doesn't actually spend as much time reading as he would like to, but if you enjoy reading he'll always find time to do it with you.

If libraries had gold card memberships, he would be the one to have it. He'd rent any and as many books as you want.

Sometimes, he'll go out of his way to find books he thinks you'd like or that you can read together. Sometimes, he'll even give you old books from his personal library if he thinks you'll enjoy them as much as he did

I don't think he's be huge on giving gifts, I see him as more of a quality-time type (but i see almost all of the bats as quality-time types so take that with a grain of salt), but I do think he'd give you lots of tiny gifts all the time.

He'll pick up a quick breakfast for the both of you at the local bodega, he'll get your pet treats, he'll bring over your favorite candy or snack everytime he comes over to your place, etc.

Loves movie nights. Doesn't matter which movie it is, it could be some dumb, low budget nightmare made to babysit kids, or the best piece of visual media ever made by human hands.

He loves being able to talk to you, he loves hearing your opinions, loves hearing your voice. He'll recommend movies to watch just because he knows you'll have a lot to say about them.

I don't think he'd have a big moment where he introduces you to his entire family, I think he'd introduce you slowly, one person at a time.

I think he'd start with Dick or Cass, or Alfred, then so on and so forth. I think Tim and Damian would either be dead last, or have to find out on their own.

The only reason the others were told by Jason straight up is because they have that bare minimum amount of respect to stay out of his business. 💀

If you're a civilian, I don't think he'd want you to have anything to do with the more dangerous side of his life. It's bad enough you're dating him to begin with, he doesn't want to put you at anymore risk.

It's a somewhat different story if you're another vigilante. I still don't think he'd want you involved in his work specifically, but he would at least know you could take care of yourself if it came down to it.

He almost always wakes up before and goes to bed after you.

He likes seeing you when you're asleep, your hair a mess, or your bonnet askew.He thinks you're so cute when you're sleeping.

I don't think he'd take lots of pictures, but i don't think he'd mind if you did.

He might actually enjoy it if you just have a ton of selfies with him.

You are his lockscreen. Whether that was a decision made by you or him is still up for debate.

Doesn't care if you're more masculine or feminine, i think he'd find something to enjoy about both aspects.

Or if you were more androgynous.

He'd for sure call you "My girl".

A list of names I think he'd call you: My girl/wife, Wifey, Angel, Sweet thing, Princess, Baby

I've said it before and I'll say it again, the man LIVES for domesticity.

Even if you aren't married, you guys will act like an old married couple.

He's not my personal fave, but guess I had a lot of thoughts about him lol

[therandomfandomme]

Batman having a recording of a heartbeat softly play in his suit so that Superman thinks he has two hearts to throw him off his scent because he's paranoid, but then one day it breaks and Superman freaks out, because "Batman where did your other heartbeat go?!!?!" and Bruce panics and says: "I split into two," like he's some sort of cryptid and everyone goes ???, luckily he has Robin to introduce them to. It's not until much later when they all reveal their identities that they learn that it's not true and all the bats and birds that are running around were not parts that ripped free from Batman. Though not before the whole family has had a whole lot of fun creating nonsense rumors just to fuck with people.

[nothesunisadeadlylazer]

ok hear me out but ..

Damian is an avid Wild Kratts fan.

Also bonus:

Edit: Thank you for 1000 on this silly post I made! <3

[dceuheadcanons]

Eye colour headcanons for the main four Batboys but specifically in the format of that one meme

Pre Lazarus Pit shenanigans:

Post Lazarus Pit:

(They are in age order, oldest to youngest)

[ev-arrested]

My favorite HC ever is Dick Grayson just. Acting dumb. In all aspects.

Richard John Grayson is perfectly fucking capable of cooking. Is stereotyped to be capable of burning water and is banned from the manor’s kitchen. His brothers have no idea he knows how to make a three Michelin star steak.

Dick Grayson is bisexual. He knows this, has known it for forever, and is 100% comfortable with it. Based on what others would tell you, though, he’s completely straight and is actually a little uncomfortable with being considered gay. 100% a fierce ally to his queer family and friends tho.

What’s navigation like for Dickie Gray? A master. Can track anything, navigate anywhere, knows a dozen methods for any given survival scenario. To everyone else? Dick cannot do it. Incapable. Directionally challenged. You’d think a trapeze artist would know which way is up, but no. He gets it from his parents.

Dickiebird? Excellent manipulator. We know this. His family knows it. Some of his friends know it. They pray for any poor soul who has no idea how manipulative Dick can be. They watch in the distance disappointedly, knowing that Dick’s victim just thinks he’s an ordinary, honest, standup guy, all the while not even knowing that despite being aware of Dick’s true nature, they are being manipulated in equal measure.

Related side note: Good ol Richy? Incredible conversationalist. Everyone knows this. It’s his whole persona. Wears that fact on his sleeve. He always finds a way to make everyone feel like he’s interested in the conversation, even if he would rather die than talk about the current topic for a second longer. And this goes beyond just giving occasional sounds of acknowledgment and peppering words like “cool” or “yeah”. Someone could be talking about the most boring topic imaginable, and he’d have a dazzling smile on his face, his body language signifying that he’s completely engaged, will even ask proper clarifying questions in an attempt to learn more. When he exits the conversation, someone asks, “wow, are you really that fascinated by (insert inane topic)?” and while Dick’s smile doesn’t even falter, he immediately drops the pretense and says, “Oh, absolutely not. That was the most boring conversation I’ve ever had in my life.”

Dick Grayson has gotten this far in life because people consistently underestimate him. He’s made himself come across as juuust incompetent enough (in very particular ways that don’t compromise his image as a capable leader), leaving everyone absolutely fucking blindsided whenever he pulls the rug out from under them about what they thought he was capable of.

And we love him for it.

[superbat-love]

Bruce: Commissioner Gordon, I wasn’t expecting a visit this late.

Gordon: My apologies, Bruce, there are some things that I need to talk to you about regarding the Wilson case.

Bruce: No apologies needed, Commissioner. Please, have a seat. Would you like a cup of tea?

Gordon: Tea would be-

Bruce: ?

Gordon:

Bruce: Commissioner?

Gordon:

Bruce: Commissioner Gordon, is everything all right?

Gordon: Bruce, there’s a- there’s a ghost floating down your hallway…

Bruce: [turns to see a sleeping Clark floating horizontally out of his bedroom, wrapped up in his blanket]

Bruce: Oh, that’s just my great-great-granduncle Tom. He’s always haunting this hallway on Thursdays. It’s his weekly chess game, and he never got over that one loss. Poor Uncle Tom…

Gordon:

Bruce: Alfred, why don’t you go and see if Uncle Tom can be persuaded to haunt another hallway instead?

Alfred: Right away, Master Bruce.

[dayasusays]

— jason todd 18+

— headcanons

fem!reader, boyfriend!jason todd, orgasm control, maledom, dirty talk, orgasm countdown

for better experience :

⌗ — boyfriend!jason todd, who is such a wonderful boyfriend and lover, but sometimes he’s such an asshole.

⌗ — boyfriend!jason todd, who stops, when you said you’re going to cum. you whimper, noticing he’s grinning and kissing whole your face. “sorry, babe, but you look so adorable, when i’m not letting you cum,” and leaves a soft kiss on your lips.

⌗ — boyfriend!jason todd, who absolutely adores control your orgasm. he thinks he’s honoured; you’re in his hands, he’s in charge, you trust him. and the realisation hits hard, when he slides inside, nuzzling your neck and moaning softly.

⌗ — boyfriend!jason todd, who teases you all of the time, because he needs to see your despair. you just have to moan his name and add choked “please, please, please…” — and there is he, caressing your clit with his rough thumb through your panties.

⌗ — boyfriend!jason todd, who chooses slow, deep pace, teasing you. “what did you say? faster?” jay’s pushing into you even harder, “can’t hear you, your moans are too loud,” he kisses your neck and presses lightly on your tummy with his hand, smiling, “i buried so deeply inside you, mi amor,” he bites your neck softly, “feel it? feel my cock?”

⌗ — boyfriend!jason todd, who knows which buttons to push. every his word makes you squeeze your walls around his cock, nuzzle his shoulder or beg for make you cum; he’s so good with his dirty talk and you hate it.

⌗ — boyfriend!jason todd, who counts down and speeds up his pace. “cmon, babe, you know when you allow to cum,” jay slows down again, “it’s only on three, not even two.”

⌗ — boyfriend!jason todd, who is such an asshole sometimes, but he’s making you cum so hard that you forgot about it. ᥫ᭡