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#dean series
winchester-girl67 · 3 months
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Wild Hearts (Part 2)
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Summary: Dean steals his father's car to give Y/N a ride home. The next day Y/N tags along to the dunes for sand surfing. 
Masterlist
Pairing: AU!Dean x reader 
Word Count: 3,771 
Warnings: underage, age gap (reader is 16, Dean is 20 but closer to 21), mentions of physical abuse by a parent, past injury (bruising/scars), mentions of death and alcoholism, John is an asshole in this one, underage drinking, angst, language, slow burn, mutual pining, a hint of jealousy, a bit of fluff 
A/N: Sand surfing looks really fun. Didn’t think I’d get this finished before the new year. Happy holidays! 
_____ 
Dean grabbed your hand every time the headlights of a car came into view and pulled you off more to the side of the road. Placing himself between you so the car would have to go through him to hit you. The last time he did it you held onto his hand and he didn't let go. Until you came up to a driveway that led to a small ranch style house sitting amongst the evergreens. 
You spotted a cherry-condition, black muscle car sitting in the driveway, "No way! Is this your car?" 
"Uh- yeah," he smiled, "-I mean, no. It's my dad's but yeah that's what we're taking." He stumbled out his words as if he was nervous. 
You trailed your finger up the hood of the car, "Sixty-seven?" 
"You know your cars." He smirked. 
"My dad used to drag me to every car show he could when I was younger. On those days he did get off work." You said, admiring the freshly waxed black paint. "And as a result, I developed a thing for pre-seventies muscle." 
"Baby's the only thing my father has ever loved." Dean said and you frowned, "Aside from my mother. She passed away when Sammy was born."
"Baby?"
"It's what he calls the car." 
You nodded. "Who's Sammy?" 
"My little brother," he explained with an edge of protectiveness, "He's sixteen, too." He bit the split in his lip until it bled and kicked the front tire with a glare. "He's probably passed out by now," and somehow you knew he was talking about his father again, "But you better wait out here." He said, pushing you off to the side of the house so you blended with the shadows of the trees lining it. "Y/N, if you hear anything... Do not come inside." 
Then he turned around and headed for the door, leaving you with a sinking feeling in your gut. The way he spoke about his father, loving four wheels and engine more than his sons. Dean looked pained at the thought and his eyes greener when they glided over his father's Impala. 
Then it hit you, his warning. His father wasn't a good man. 
You left the shadowed tree line and peered through one of Baby’s windows. Fast food bags littered the front bench seat and a half a bottle of liquor lay on the floor. Your skin started to crawl at the thought of Dean's father coming home half-pissed and taking his day out on his sons. No doubt Dean only stuck around for his little brother. You wondered if Sam had endured the same type of injuries or if Dean always stood between them. Somehow you already knew the answer. 
The screen door shut with an audible creak and Dean reappeared on the porch, "Y/N?" He whisper shouted as he scanned the area you were supposed to wait. "Y/N." 
"Over here," you matched his tone. 
"Got 'em." He jingled the keys for you to see. "Let's push her out onto the street before we start her though." He opened the driver's door, "Here, you steer, I'll push." 
"You're not gonna get in trouble, are you?" You hesitated, you didn't think you could bear to see more bruises on him, or worse. 
He gave you a cocky smile, "I'm not gonna get caught." 
You slid in behind the wheel and shifted into neutral, taking a moment to appreciate Baby's beauty despite the mess of trash in the front seat. Meanwhile Dean ran around to the bumper and started pushing the car down the driveway. You braked when you got to the edge of the street, throwing open the door and letting Dean take over as you slid over to the passenger side. 
The car grinded to a stop as he pulled up in front of your house. It was a beautiful car but the whole ride felt like a tin can rolling over bumps in the road and the muffler rattled against the undercarriage the entire time. His father didn’t seem like the type to put his time or money into anything that couldn’t give back to him. Which apparently included keeping up maintenance on Baby. 
"For someone who's supposed to love this car," you flicked a used ketchup packet onto the floor and wiped your sticky fingers on your jeans, "He's shit at taking care of it." 
"Imagine if he didn't love her." Dean's eyes were lost on the dashboard, deep in some solitary thought. "He didn't deserve her and he doesn't deserve this car." For a moment you thought he must've been talking about his mother. You wondered if the abuse started before or after her passing. You didn't ask. "Are you busy tomorrow?" 
"Um."
"It's fine if you didn't mean it. About being my friend. But I was gonna go sand surfing and I thought that might be something you'd like to do. Something friends do." He shrugged. "I-I'm not trying to be creepy. Just friends." 
"I don't think you're creepy," you shook your head and met his sad smile, "I'd love to go, sand surfing? What is that?" 
He laughed, "It's like snowboarding but down a sand dune. It's easy, I'll teach you. Fall's the best time for it because the sand won't burn you." 
"That sounds fun." 
"Good, I'll pick you up," he said and then added, "My friend's driving. There'll be others there too, but they're not like your brother's friends." 
"I don't like my brother's friends." 
"These are good people," he smiled, the bruised part of his face hidden in the shadows of the car and you almost forgot about it. He had a nice smile, he didn't show too many teeth or too much gums. "I'll give you my number, in case you decide to cancel." 
You laughed silently but let him enter his phone number into your cell. Then you texted him so he'd have yours, too. 
"Thanks for the ride, Dean." You reached over and gave him a quick side hug. He didn't even have a chance to react but stared at the dash again and nodded when you pulled away. "Text me when you get home or I'll worry." 
"You don't have to worry about me, Y/N, I'm not a child." He said cordially. 
He'd obviously picked up on you putting the pieces of his home life together, his injuries, his father, how much he was risking by stealing Baby tonight. Dean was tall and built enough to protect himself, but nobody should stand alone and clearly his father was still bigger and stronger. 
"People worry about you in every stage of life, Dean. At least they should. I will." He looked over at you and matched your frown. 
"But you only just met me." 
His words echoed in your ears well after you showered and crawled into bed. Dean brought about so many feelings in you that you didn't know which to follow. You felt butterflies, and mutual affection like you'd known each other longer than you did, and an untethered desire to protect him, which was absurd because although he was skinny, he could toss you over his shoulder and spin you around if he wanted to. His bruises and scars made you feel helpless, but his smile made you happy because you could tell he felt lighter, too. 
You checked your phone and found a message from him. 
Dean: Mission impossible accomplished. See you tomorrow. 
Y/N: Thanks for texting. Goodnight, Dean. 
Dean: Night, Y/N. 
You'd be lying if you said you weren't developing a crush. You sighed and rolled over in bed. What could you do, nothing. He'd get into a lot more trouble than you. 
Sleep did not come easy after that and you woke up before you thought you'd even fallen asleep. You groaned and rolled over in bed when you heard your phone buzz. 
Dean: Good morning, Y/N. 
Y/N: Geez, you wake up early. What time is it? 
Dean: You're literally looking at your phone. 
Y/N: Omg! It's 6am, what is wrong with you?! 
Dean: You know the saying, early bird... 
Y/N: The sun isn't even awake yet, Dean. 
Dean: You're grumpy in the morning. 
Dean: Just wanted to let you know we'll pick you up around noon. 
Dean: Y/N? You still wanna come, right? 
Y/N: Yeah! Sorry, I'm tired. 
Dean: Awesome. Just one question before you pass out on me. Benny's bringing a grill, so we're making hotdogs for lunch. You're not a vegetarian are you? 
Y/N: Yeah...
Y/N: I'm joking. No, I'm not. 
Dean: Good, our friendship might've ended right there. 
Dean: Just kidding. Go back to sleep. 
You smiled at your phone a little too long before you locked it and went back to sleep for a few hours. 
"Hey, sweetie. You're awake early." Your mother said when you walked into the kitchen around ten. It was early compared to your typical Sunday morning. "Have fun last night?" 
You nodded, not wanting to get into the events of your brother or his friends from the bonfire. Your mom seemed to accept the answer and you assumed your brother made it home at some point without her noticing the hour. 
You got along with your parents well enough. You never really got into any trouble and you weren’t sure they even knew how to ground you if you did. Besides, your dad wasn’t around much lately, it seemed his new promotion kept him at the office longer than necessary. Which was where he was now. On a Sunday, at ten A.M. 
You didn't know what you wanted to do when you grew up, but you knew you wanted to have balance in your life. Something you thought your dad didn't understand. You couldn't remember the last time he brought you to a car show, you couldn't remember the last time you'd asked him to bring you either. 
"Your dad said he'd be home for dinner and your brother probably won't be up until mid-afternoon. What time did you two get in last night?" She asked, sipping on her coffee. 
You didn't have a curfew because you never had the need for one and your parents oddly trusted you. You didn't do crazy shit to make them worry about you but sometimes you wanted to, if only just for the attention. So you knew she was just curious when she asked. 
"I dunno," you shrugged, not wanting to get into why you didn't know and that you didn't come home with your brother. "I'm going out with some friends for lunch." 
"That sounds fun," you weren't sure if she was even listening anymore or just saying that. 
Your family had gotten better at not actually listening to each other lately. But you ignored that fact yourself and grabbed a bowl of cereal for breakfast. 
At eleven-thirty, you threw on a pair of high-rise jeans and an oversized t-shirt that you knotted at the waist. You also pulled on a flannel shirt in case it got chilly which was the way the weather was turning lately. Then you texted Dean. 
Y/N: Text when you get here, I'll come out and meet you. 
You wanted to avoid an awkward interaction with your mother. Especially since your brother was awake now and slamming the kitchen cupboards. He wouldn't really care but he was nosey and would start something if he saw how much older Dean was. And you doubted a few hours would've helped much with the bruising on his face. That wouldn't be fair to make Dean explain how he'd got them to complete strangers. Especially since you were pretty sure you knew how he'd gotten them. 
Dean: We're here. 
You shouted a 'Bye' as you ran out of the house, hearing your brother ask your mom where you were headed before the door slammed shut behind you. You shoved your phone into your back pocket and ran down the driveway to where a red Jeep waited. Dean stood outside, leaning against the door. 
He smiled when he saw you run up, "Hey." 
"Hi." You said, noticing his face falling, "What's wrong?" 
"I feel like we're sneaking around," he glanced back at your house as if he expected someone to come running out after you. "Feels wrong." 
"I just didn't want you to have to deal with the inevitable questions about, you know," you pointed to the left side of his face. "But if you want I can introduce you before we go... Or you could come over Friday for family dinner and give that a little more time to heal." 
He stared at you for half a second then shoved his hands in his pockets, "Family dinner sounds nice." 
"Great, I'll set it up tonight!" You smiled brightly and touched his arm, "Feel better?" 
He swallowed and nodded and you heard someone shout impatiently from inside the Jeep. Dean opened the backdoor for you and climbed in after you. You sat in the middle next to a guy with black hair and blue eyes who looked about the same age as Dean. 
"Hey, I'm Cas." The guy greeted you as you settled in. 
As soon as the door was closed the Jeep pulled out onto the road with a bounce from a pothole the tire hit. 
A small brunette in the middle front seat turned around and waved, "I'm Ruby, Sam's girlfriend," she pointed to a lanky guy with long brown hair next to her who offered you a smile. 
They looked about the same age as you, at least you knew Sam was. You noticed right away Sam didn't have any bruises or obvious scars. You felt a bit proud of Dean for that and also a little sorry that he didn't have someone like himself to have his back. 
"That's Benny," Dean said, pointing to the guy driving. "Benny say ‘Hi’."
"Hi." He glanced in the rearview mirror. 
"He's quiet until you get to know him." Dean explained. 
Benny, by far, looked the oldest of the bunch. Maybe it was because he hadn't shaved in a couple of days or maybe it was because he was built like a linebacker. But either way he didn't seem to like you. It was just a vibe you got in the split second your eyes connected. It practically radiated off him and you wondered if you were the only one picking up on it. 
"So, Y/N, how come I never see you at school?" Ruby asked, spinning around in her seat to face you completely and bumping into Benny who growled. Maybe it wasn't just you. "You're not home schooled are you?" 
"No, I go to one near my dad's work." You explained quickly, not really wanting to talk about school. 
"Where does your dad work?" Sam asked this time. 
“At Sandover Bridge and Iron. He’s the Director of Sales and Marketing.” You bounced your eyebrows. Really all that means is he’s barely around anymore. 
"That's cool," he said, shifting his eyes to Dean for a second. 
"Oh," Ruby’s brown eyes widened for a second and you knew what she was thinking. 
"Yeah."
"Am I missing something?" Dean asked, glancing between the two of you. 
"It’s a private school." You explained and it seemed to dawn on him. "What are you smirking at?" 
"You have to wear a uniform, don't you?" He smiled so wide the split in his lip threatened to pull again. 
"If you must know, yes, and it is the bane of my existence." You rolled your eyes dramatically to make your point. 
"So, like a plaid skirt with those long socks?" 
"Careful, Dean. We're friends, remember?" You whispered to him and he opened his mouth to respond, but then snapped it shut and turned to stare out the window. 
Ruby pouted, resting her chin on the back of the seat, "That's too bad. You could've sat with us at lunch and I would've shown you around. Dean says you're new." 
"Yeah," you sighed. That would've been nice to know someone in school. You had begged your parents to let you go to a public school this time, but they insisted. "Too bad." 
Dean had gotten really quiet and you nudged him with your elbow. He turned to smile and swallow thickly before turning a cold-shoulder and staring out the window again. You had only been teasing, but you didn't want him getting any ideas that would only result in him getting in trouble. 
"How do you guys know Dean?" You asked, directing the question at Cas since Benny didn't seem to be much of a talker. 
"We grew up together. Well, me and Dean did." Cas explained, "Benny just kind of showed up one day and we couldn't get rid of him." Benny growled and Cas winked in the rearview mirror. "He really is a teddy bear once you get to know him." 
Once you got to the beach Benny didn't park in the parking lot, instead he drove out onto the beach and down the shore for a long time until you were surrounded by only dunes of sand. It would've taken forever to walk there. He parked at the top of the dunes and everyone filtered out of the Jeep. The guys grabbed the boards from the trunk and Benny got to setting up his grill. You guessed he wasn't really into sand surfing. 
Dean said he was going to teach how to surf, but he was already halfway down the dune with Cas when you looked. And Sam and Ruby were flirting as they carried their boards over to join them and you didn't feel like third wheeling it today, so you hung back with Benny. 
"Need a hand?" Your voice was softer than you'd like it to be but you found him intimidating, even if he wasn't nearly as tall as Dean or Sam who was a moose at sixteen and probably still growing.
"Thought you came for that," he pointed at the dune where the others had run off to and you saw a couple extra boards stuck in the sand at the top. But you still didn't know how to surf, never even been snowboarding. And those surfboards looked a lot more like snowboards. You'd hurt yourself for sure without knowing how to turn or stop. "I hope you know what you're doing with him." 
Your eyes snapped back to Benny's and you squinted, "Excuse me." 
He raised his hands and his eyebrows, "His home life is... undesirable. I know you know what I mean. Last thing he needs is your parents on top of his own." 
You didn't think your parents would bat an eye at Dean. Mainly because they were wrapped up in their own lives and didn’t pay you much attention. But if they did notice, you wondered if they would dislike Dean enough to turn what you have with him into something wrong and indecent. You'd like to think they wouldn't because it wasn't. But it's a parent's job to be protective of their child.
"We're just friends." 
"Not the way he looks at you." Benny cocked his head and started setting up the foldable stand for the grill. "He's not thinking when he's around you. And don't get me wrong, I like seeing him happy, he's been there for me more times than I can count, but- Do you have any idea what his father would've done if he knew Dean took that car out last night. If that's the way he looks after spilling paint in the garage..." You didn't know what to say and opened your mouth like a fish out of water before he continued. "Dean's never done anything like that before. I'm just asking you to be careful with him. He has two years left and then he and Sam can get the hell out of there." 
"Why two years?" That's all you could manage to ask. 
"Dean's tried to get custody of Sam since he turned eighteen but the lawyers always tell him the same thing. He's too young himself, with no steady income and no decent living quarters. Going through courts takes time and money and Sam would likely age out before that time." He explained as you fiddled with the knot in your t-shirt. 
"How'd you know about the car?" 
"I live next door, I helped him push it back up the driveway so his father wouldn't wake up and hear the engine." 
"I'm sorry, I didn't know. I mean, I kind of knew but I guess I believed him when he said it would be fine." You watched your shoes and tried to still your bottom lip. "Just so you know, I'm not trying to cause him any more pain. We just kind of connected last night and I like him. I'm not gonna do anything that'll get him in trouble though. I promise." 
"Kid, I'm not worried about you doing the dumb shit. I'm worried about him." He scratched his slight beard. "It's not fair to ask you to think for the both of you." 
"It's not fair to ask me to not be his friend either." 
"I couldn't ask that of you." 
You kind of missed quiet Benny and the afternoon was starting to feel a lot like last night with your brother's friends. You wiped a tear threatening to fall down your cheek when you were sure Benny wasn't looking; everyone else taking a second run down the dune after climbing back up. You stood around and kicked at the sand until you could feel grains in your shoe. 
"Hey, cher, can you grab me the hotdogs from the cooler?" Benny asked and nodded towards the cooler next to the Jeep. 
You didn't bother digging around and just brought him the whole cooler. He split open the pack of hotdogs and started grilling. Then pulled a can of beer from the cooler and opened it. He handed it to you and grabbed his own. You wondered if you actually had to drink it, but he clearly saw that you were upset and it was a peace offering of sorts. So you took a sip. 
The fifth sip wasn't so bad and the seventh went down even easier. But it still tasted gross and you still didn't see the point. Maybe just a little warmth in your cheeks. 
Sam and Ruby were the first to run back over when Benny rang the dinner bell. Followed by Cas and Dean. Dean eyed the beer can in your hand and you took another sip before you grabbed a hotdog and walked away.
_________________________
Part 3
_________________________ Dean: @akshi8278 @laycblack @thoughts-and-funnies @mrsjenniferwinchester @crustycheeks @kazsrm67 @sexyvixen7 @lyarr24 @suckitands33  @eliwinchester99 @yvonneeeee @igotmajordaddyissues @djs8891 @leigh70 @globetrotter28 @backseat-of-deans-67chevy
SPN: @hobby27
Wild Hearts: @justrealizedimmascifygurl @evieluvsjamie @kimberkingrivers
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deanwritings · 1 year
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Master List
Fan Favorites
Night Falls Master List: After witnessing a murder, Y/N becomes a protected witness to FBI Agent Dean Winchester, who needs her help to do more than just solve one man’s murder.
FwB - Master List: FwB - Friends with Benefits. After walking in on Y/N following a fun encounter, Dean and Y/N decide it would be beneficial and much easier to use each other for their needs. But can they keep it just about sex? (SMUT)
Stay: The reader confronts Dean about his feelings for her, and when he refuses to admit how he feels, the reader gives him an ultimatum.
I Ship It: Reader insert into the 200th episode, “Fanfiction” where Marie ships Dean x reader.
Since I’ve Been Loving You: Having slow sex with Dean while “Since I’ve Been Loving You” by Led Zeppelin plays and Dean accidentally confesses his love for you.
Safe Now: After a tough hunt, Dean is upset that the reader put her life in danger to save him.
Baby, We’ve Got A Problem: The reader faces some trouble when Baby isn’t just a car anymore. Human!Impala
Series
Night Falls - Master List: After witnessing a murder, Y/N becomes a protected witness to FBI Agent Dean Winchester, who needs her help to do more than just solve one man’s murder.
FwB - Master List: FwB - Friends with Benefits. After walking in on Y/N following a fun encounter, Dean and Y/N decide it would be beneficial and much easier to use each other for their needs. But can they keep it just about sex? (SMUT)
Baby, We’ve Got A Problem - Master List: The reader faces some trouble when Baby isn’t just a car anymore. Human!Impala
The Guest House: Dean Winchester is going through a nasty divorce. He doesn't have much left to his name, but what he does have is his house. Leave it to his soon-to-be ex wife to find a way to even ruin that for him. Enter Y/N, who is looking to get away from life for a bit, and stumbles right into the middle of it all.
For the Best - Master List: You and Dean parted ways three years ago after a hunt went horribly wrong, and you haven’t seen him since. While passing through a town, Dean spots a familiar face and can’t help but give you a call to see how you’ve been all these years later.
As I Lay Dying - Master List: While driving back to the bunker one snowy night, the reader is on the phone with Dean, but as she’s driving, she hits a patch of ice and goes off the road. Trapped in the car, she thinks back to her favorite memories with Dean.
As Time Goes By: Time After Time AU where instead of Elliot Ness, Dean hunts Chronos with the reader.
As Time Goes By: Part 1
As Time Goes By: Part 2
Smut
Stay: The reader confronts Dean about his feelings for her, and when he refuses to admit how he feels, the reader gives him an ultimatum.
Since I’ve Been Loving You: Having slow sex with Dean while “Since I’ve Been Loving You” by Led Zeppelin plays and Dean accidentally confesses his love for you.
Don’t Need Candles or Cake: You have quite the surprise in store for Dean’s birthday
Rub-A-Dub-Dub: Some post-hunt, shower sex
Safe Now: After a tough hunt, Dean is upset that the reader put her life in danger to save him. 
Forgive me Father, for I have sinned: The reader has some not-so-pure thoughts when she sees Priest!Dean for the first time
Angst
Green-Eyed Monster: Reader and the boys are working a case and the reader keeps getting hit on, leaving Dean annoyed and jealous.
Persona Non Grata: On the run from Heaven, rebel Angel!Reader becomes a hunter, crossing paths with the infamous Winchesters. She quickly falls for Dean, but it all goes to hell when he finds out what she truly is.
What’s Mine is Mine: (SPOILERS: Set after Season 9 finale) The reader and Dean were dating before he became a demon. Now that he’s turned, his desire to protect her is even stronger and more out of control. Demon!Dean
No More Solo Hunts: Dean being protective and desperately trying to keep you from doing dangerous things, but you continue to sneak out and hunt by yourself
Remember Me?: After being knocked out on a hunt, the reader wakes up in a seemingly unknown bunker, with whom she thinks are two unknown men.
That’s Enough: After a rather nasty fight between you and your boyfriend, Dean, he goes out to drink and you go after him to stop him.
What We Lost: After a shapeshifter hunt, Dean begins pushing you away, and you can't figure out why. Trigger Warning/story spoiler in the post tags 
Capeesh?: A fun night out at the bar takes a turn for the worse when a handsy patron approaches the reader.
Too Far Gone: (SPOILERS: Set after Season 9 finale) While looking for leads on Dean, you manage to stumble across the one person you were looking for. And it’s not the reunion you were expecting. Demon!Dean.
You Rang?: (SPOILERS: Set after Season 9 finale) A week after Dean is killed and he disappears, you run to the nearest crossroads to get him back. Problem is, the demon won’t make a deal.
Your Helping Hand: Having made a choice to not to go with her reaper, the reader is now stuck on Earth as a ghost. Her days are pretty boring, until Dean Winchester rolls into town on a case and is in need of some extra, unseen help.
Here For You: Dean takes care of the reader after an extremely emotional week. TW: Mentions of suicide
It’s Okay: Reader is in the closet about her bisexuality, but Dean figures it out one night and tries to set her up with Charlie, only to have the reader confess her feelings for Dean.
Estar Roto: As the boys prepare for a vampire hunt, the reader is shaken with the memories of her rape. TW: Rape
Skinny Love: Reader is self conscious about her body so Dean decides to help.
Big Girls Do Cry: Reader suffers a migraine and Dean takes care of her.
Fluff
I Ship It: Reader insert into the 200th episode, “Fanfiction” where Marie ships Dean x reader.
Distracted: Dean is trying very hard to focus on research for a hunt, but you have other plans.
Never Let You Go: Dean has a special surprise in store for the reader but first has to trick her so she won't catch onto his plan. After all, hunters are the hardest to surprise.
New Years: It’s New Year's Eve in Sin City with the Winchester boys, and Dean gets to see the reader all dressed up for the first time.
Happy Birthday, Dean: Reader goes all out to celebrate Dean’s birthday.
Oh, Baby: After a hunt, Dean and the reader care for a baby while they look for the next of kin.
When One Door Opens: Dean watches you shower when you leave the door open “by accident”
Drunk Words, Sober Thoughts: Drunk!Dean taking care of Drunker!Reader when a few confessions slip through loose lips. 
On Your Left: It’s Halloween and you convince the boys to dress up as your favorite superhero group. AmericasAss!Dean
Underneath the Mistletoe Last Night: Dean and the reader get into the Christmas spirit.
I’ll Be Home For Christmas: With the boys out for a hunt, Christmas is here and the reader finds herself all alone.
Coming Up Short: Dean decides to poke fun at short!reader.
Tiny Dancer: Not trusting their new partner, Dean follows the reader late one night and is amazed to see her hidden talent.
Slip Up: Dean likes you, but won't tell you. Cas lets it slip one day.
Trying to Be Mad: After a hunt, Dean gets hurt and you're taking care of him. You’re mad at him for being so reckless, but Dean is making it very difficult to be angry with him
Meta Madness: The reader is caught reading Supernatural.
Time to Get Up: Dean doesn’t want to get up, no matter how hard the reader tries, so they take a new approach.
Sweet Child of Mine: After the passing of her mother, the reader decides it’s finally time to find her father. Dad!Dean x Daughter!Reader
Short Hair, Don’t Care: Annoyed with your long hair, you decide it’s time for a change.
Guard Dog: Sam and Dean run into a hunter who has a partner of her own. And that partner does not like Dean.
Flour, Flour Everywhere: The reader tries their hand at baking a pie, ruining Dean's perfect kitchen in the process.
Daddy’s Girl: You bring your boyfriend home for Thanksgiving and a simple confusion at the dinner table turns into your worst nightmare. Dad!Dean x Daughter!Reader
Black Cat: After killing a witch on a hunt, the reader adopts the witch’s black cat, much to Dean’s displeasure.
High On Fear: You and the boys have to take a flight out to Puerto Rico for a job. You are terrified of flying, and Dean has to comfort you
Surprise!: Reader is upset when no one seems to realize it's their birthday.
Song Fics
Wildest Dreams: Dean dreams about two nights, one of his favorite nights, and one of his worst. A nice, angsty fic based on Taylor Swift’s Wildest Dreams
Heart Like Yours: Dean is avoiding you, and avoiding his feelings for you. But you won’t let him get away that easy. 
It Was Always You: After a nightmare, Dean needs to make sure you’re okay, realizing his feelings for you in the process. 
Down on Love: When the reader hears her favorite song coming from Dean’s room, she decides to show him what he’s missing out on. 
I Want You Back: Reader is singing in the shower, thinking the boys are gone but Dean gets back early.
Dream a Little Dream of Me: The reader is humming her favorite song and swaying along in her seat, so Dean decides to ask her to dance. 
9 Crimes: Dean and the reader are doing what they can to forget the other. 
Mr. Brightside (Ending 1): Dean is home at the bunker stewing while you’re out on a date, thinking about the chance he missed. 
Mr. Brightside (Ending 2): Dean is home at the bunker stewing while you’re out on a date, thinking about the chance he missed.
Faithfully: Singing your heart out with Dean to “Faithfully” by Journey
Bury Your Burdens In The Ground: Dean is burying his demons the best way he knows how, but you won’t let him do it alone. 
Cigarette Daydreams (Version 1): The moments Dean abandons you. 
Cigarette Daydreams (Version 2): The moments Dean abandons you. 
In Your Room: Dean opens up to the reader after a tough hunt.
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How Dean Spends a Rainy Day With You
How Dean Takes Care of You When You’re Sick
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jawritter · 1 year
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Carry On Masterlist
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Summary: It was just a simple hunt, found on a pie festival. It was supposed to be easy. Something they’d all done one hundred and one times a million. No one could have told Y/N, Dean, and Sam that nothing from that point on would ever be the same again.
Warnings: Heavy, HEAVY TW: Dean’s final episode of SPN. (Season 15x20 spoilers). Graphic injury. Me botching medical jargon, A lot of pain, blood, and hospital type atmosphere. Injured Dean Winchester. Depression. PTSD. Angst. Some fluff. Eventual Smut. (Each chapter will be warned and have their own warnings to the best of my abilities.)
Due to the graphic nature of this fic, and the fact that it will eventually contain Smut. This fic is an 18 + only fic! If you’re under 18 DO NOT read this fic! 
A/N: This fic is beta’d by @kazsrm67 Thanks so much love! Please do not copy my work! Feedback is golden! I hope you all enjoy this ride with me!
My Mastlist
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Chapter 1 
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7 
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29 (Final)
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Forever Tags: 
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spnfanficpond · 7 months
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Hello,
I’m reaching out with help finding a fic that I lost. It’s an AU Dean x reader. Dean, head of Winchester inc. recently broke up with his fiancé and needs a stand so that his father hands over his shares of the company. So Dean convinces the reader to be his fiancé and then wife until he can get his fathers shares.
Other information the reader has a daughter and the reader agrees in order to give a better life for her.
Like an fool I forgot to save story 🤦‍♀️. If anyone can help me find it I would greatly appreciate it!!
Admin Michelle here! THIS RANG A BELL. So, I searched my blog and found it! It's Light My Fire by @smol-and-grumpy!!
Such an excellent fic. *swoon*
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I may have spent the last 20 minutes creating a playlist that is inspiring my next series 😅
Oops... 😂 Oh well. I needed the serotonin from ordering the songs perfectly and matching them to different povs and plot points.
I hope CollegeAU!Dean sounds good to you guys... Because that's what I'm planning. 😊
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mrswhozeewhatsis · 7 months
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Chapters: 38/? Fandom: Supernatural Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Relationships: Dean Winchester/Original Female Character(s), Ruby/Sam Winchester Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel (Supernatural), Bobby Singer, Michael (Supernatural), Gabriel (Supernatural), Original Female Character(s), Impala (Supernatural), John Winchester, Demons (Supernatural), Angels (Supernatural), Fallen Angels (Supernatural), Jody Mills, Donna Shoemaker, Chuck Shurley, Lucifer (Supernatural), Raphael (Supernatural), Henry Winchester, The Campbells, Alpha Vampire (Supernatural), Alpha Djinn (Supernatural), Alpha Shapeshifter (Supernatural), Adam Milligan, Cain (Supernatural), Amara (Supernatural), Metatron (Supernatural), Gadreel (Supernatural), Mary Winchester, Charlie Bradbury, Dick Roman, Clare Novak, Alex Jones (Supernatural), Kaia Nieves, Bad Place Kaia Nieves, Jack Kline, Kelly Kline Additional Tags: Gabriel (Supernatural) is Loki, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Dean Winchester is Sam Winchester's Parent, Protective Dean Winchester, Demon Dean Winchester, Original Character(s), Original Character-centric, Original Character Death(s), Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt Sam Winchester, Angelic Possession, Dysfunctional Family, Family Drama, Demonic Possession, Demon Blood Addiction, Saving People Hunting Things, dean and original female character, Protective Sam Winchester, Protective Castiel, Impala Conversations, Impala, Men of Letters Bunker, British Men of Letters, British Men of Letters Being Assholes, Motel Rooms, Bobby Singer's House, Worried Bobby Singer, Parental Bobby Singer, Awesome Jody Mills, Parental Jody Mills, Awesome Donna Noble, Angel Wings, family business, alternative worlds, Rock and Roll, Classic Rock Summary:
When she kills the werewolf that had used her college campus as a hunting ground, Aaliyah makes a call that changes her life and answers questions she had for years. She jumps into the hunting world and settles into a nursing job when a call for help brings her into the larger world with the Winchesters.
DISCONTINUED. IN RE-WRITE.
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deecotan · 7 months
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one piece x community because i've been watching community lately
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insanesonofabitch · 6 months
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Thinking about how the plot of season 6 wouldn’t make sense if you do not acknowledge the fact that Cas and Crowley working together was an affair, or at least it felt like so to Dean.
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Majority of the people that I heard saying that they disliked that conflict, say that it doesn’t make sense because Dean should’ve understood Cas’ point of view. And that Dean has also worked with demons before, more than once, out of desperation. Which is why he doesn’t have the right to be mad. And I understand that. But it wasn’t about working with demons. No. Not really. The thing that hurt Dean the most about Cas’ choice was how he chose to ask for help from Crowley, instead of him. Cas chose Crowley over him.
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“Look me in the eye, and tell me you’re not working with Crowley…”
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“You’re in it with him? You and Crowley?? You’re going after purgatory together??? You have, huh? This whole time!”
“No, you had a choice. You just made the wrong one.”
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“I was there. Where were you?”
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The plot literally doesn’t make sense if you do not acknowledge destiel or crowstiel or deancascrowley. And I think that’s insane, especially for a show from 2005.
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DO YOU KNOW THIS CHARACTER?
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gentlemancowboy · 4 months
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Gayest Dean Moment Not Involving Cas Honorable Mention (In the Tags) ➼ Whatever Was Going on with Benny
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hobbitinthetardis · 5 months
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#the yearning gaze
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winchester-girl67 · 3 months
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Wild Hearts (Part 7) - Ten Years After Dean Came Back
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Summary: Dean and Y/N attend a session of couples' counselling with Dr. Garth Fitzgerald. They struggle with Y/N's infertility and make a final decision about the future of their family together.
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Pairing: AU!Dean x reader 
Word Count: 2,668 
Warnings: age gap (reader is 32, Dean is 37), infertility, couples' therapy, adoption, relationship angst, mentions of physical abuse by a parent, language, angst, fluff 
A/N: After many rewrites and some creative differences with the characters in this series, we’ve come to the last part. 
_____ 
Ten years after Dean came back. 
"And how does that make you feel, Y/N?" The skinny man asked from his chair placed next to the couch. 
He wore a tweed suit and you thought he looked more like a college professor than a couples' therapist. He had a notebook in his hands and jotted down notes every time either of you spoke. 
"I don't know, not good." You shrugged. 
"Mhm," he jotted down more notes, "I see." 
It was your first appointment and Dean had yet to speak up for any of the questions. He told you there was no point in going since he still loved you and you still loved him. He made it sound so simple, but it was more complicated than that. And he knew you needed to talk it through, so here he was supporting you and holding your hand; you couldn't ask for more. 
"And, Dean, how do you feel about it?" Mr. Fitzgerald asked. 
Dean scrubbed his free hand over his mouth and chin as he side eyed you. Mr. Fitzgerald, or Garth as he told you to call him, hadn't directed any questions towards Dean until now. Dean didn't seem too happy about it, but refused to let that show in the way he looked at you. All you saw was love. 
"I'm okay with it," Dean said, still looking at you. 
"How can you be okay with it?" You asked, scrunching your forehead. 
"Because I love you, this doesn't change anything between us." He said with a shake of his head. "It doesn't change the way I feel about you or the fact that I still want to spend the rest of my life with you. I need you here with me. I can't do any of it without you."
"Yes, you can." You said. 
"I don't want to." 
Garth stayed silent while he listened and jotted down notes. He was a nice guy but hadn't said anything helpful yet. Maybe couples therapy was about opening the conversation more than actual advice or guidance. Maybe he just worked as a buffer and had you guys find your own way through. 
"Everything's different now, Dean." 
"No."
"You're the one that had our future planned out; two kids, one boy, one girl, a white picket fence, a big yard, and a dog. You even hung a tire swing and started building a treehouse, for fuck's sake." Your chin started to tremble and you took a breath. "Dean, you want kids and I want you to have them but it's not going to happen with me. I'm broken, my body's broken." 
After four years of trying to get pregnant and the endless testing and trials, you were spent. Your body was spent and you couldn't remember the last time sex felt like it was supposed to. It felt clinical now like you were running through a maze for a piece of cheese. You tried almost everything, there were calendars and ovulation sticks, hormone injections, temperature readings, wedge pillows, and you were sick of it all. 
You couldn't imagine it felt any different for Dean either. Your sex life was present but unaccounted for. 
"I love you." Said Dean. 
He wiped your cheeks dry from the tears streaming down them and kissed your forehead. It didn't matter how many times you'd snapped at him over the past four years with your hormones in overdrive, you couldn't push him away if you tried. And you had tried. 
That was one reason why you wanted to go to therapy, you wanted to come to terms with your infertility and let it go. You wanted to stop the hormone treatments and stop feeling the way you were. You wanted to feel like yourself again. 
"Y/N, did you hear what Dean just said?" Garth asked when he saw you had calmed down. Dean clutched your hand in his and gave it a squeeze. You shook your head. "He said, he loves you, do you believe that?" 
"Yes," you knew he did. 
That was something you never had to worry about with Dean. He let you know in more ways than one and you never questioned it. Hell, he supported you through the trials for this long because he knew it was what you wanted. He saw the toll it took on you and wanted to stop a long time ago, but you weren't ready to make your peace with it, with your body. Until now, you hoped. 
"So then why are you pushing him away?" Garth asked, resting his pen on his notebook and giving you his full attention. "Do you think that's what he wants? That it'll make him happy to find someone else who can bear his children?" 
"Maybe," you shrugged and refused to meet Dean's hurt stare. 
Dean shook his head. "Y/N, I love you." He whispered, he had been saying that a lot lately. Like he knew it wasn't sinking in. 
"And, Dean, when you tell Y/N that you love her, is that what you mean? Or are you trying to tell her something else that you can't find the words to say?" Garth asked and Dean cleared his throat and nodded. "What are you trying to tell her?" 
Dean thought for a long moment, "The future I planned for us, I don't want that with anyone else." 
"But we won't have it either," you said. 
"I've made my peace with that and we're here so you can too." He rubbed the back of your hand with his thumb. His green eyes pleading with you like he still tried to convince you of everything he felt and hadn't been able to communicate. 
"It's not fair, I wanted a family too. I never thought I would this badly, but I do. With you, I do." You sniffled, "It's not fair. The one thing I'm supposed to be able to do and I can't." 
"We still can." 
"How? I can't get pregnant, Dean, and I can't keep taking those hormones. My mood swings are all over the map with them and it's not working."
"We stop trying." 
"What?" You frowned, "I don't understand, how can we have a family if I can't get pregnant? We can't afford a surrogate, Dean." 
"Making a baby doesn't make you its parent, Y/N, trust me I know. My father might've played a very short hand in creating me but he was never a dad, he was never there for me, he never cared, he never loved me or Sammy." 
"Speaking of unfair, how can a man like that make two kids and I can't even begin to form one? Ugh!" You sighed exasperatedly and fell back against the couch feeling defeated. 
Dean smiled at your little tantrum and you wondered how he was able to do that. Find levity in the difficult parts of life. But that was his motto, something like: if you don't laugh, you cry. And for a moment, you saw him with a younger face, a bruised eye and a split lip. Smiling at you under the streetlamp with ice cream on his nose. That was almost seventeen years ago now. 
You were finally voicing your disappointment at the cards you had been dealt and that was a step at healing. You tried for so long to be strong and composed but Dean always saw right through it. He hated seeing you hurt, but it was hard to come to terms with the fact that your body could never do what you wanted it to, it was less hard for him; even if the struggle was the same. 
You had to live in your mind and listen to the little voice that called you broken. Dean just had to watch. Although, now that you thought about it, watching someone in pain could be just as painful. Especially when they refused your help and pushed you away. 
You silently promised him you would never do that again. 
"I love you, Dean." You squeezed his hand. 
You were endlessly thankful to have him around to pull you out of your funk. You tried to smile back at him as you sat up. 
"Can I interject here," Garth smiled, "I think Dean's talking about adoption. Sometimes a family you choose has stronger bonds than ones you make. You run that youth group, right, Y/N? So you of all people should know that there are many children out there that wish they could have parents that want them as badly as you and Dean want a child. At least look into it, if that's something you'd be willing to do." 
"Do you want to adopt?" You asked Dean, he'd never mentioned it before. 
"I looked into it after we found out conceiving would be difficult and again after your last round of hormone therapy. I kind of put our names on this list because it can take a long time to be selected." He confessed and quickly added, "I wanted us to have options and I'm completely fine with not having kids either. We could just be the cool Aunt and Uncle to Sammy and Jess' twins. I'd be alright with that as long as you're the one I'm growing old with. I want you in that rocking chair beside me on the porch and I'll tear down that white picket fence when we get home." 
“No, don’t do that... maybe we could paint it though.” You shrugged. 
"I like the way you think, sweetheart." Dean chuckled with a little smirk. 
Garth looked at the clock on the wall and clapped his hands together, "Well, I think that was an excellent session and I've got a bit of homework for you. Y/N, I think it would be healthy for you to look into adoption with Dean, exhaust all of your options together before you commit to a decision about your future. And, Dean, I want you to try talking about how you’re feeling to Y/N rather than just declaring your undying love for her." You laughed and Dean blushed, "I think she gets it, but she's not a mind reader. Everyone benefits from open communication and all I'm asking is that you try, you don't even have to be good at it, just put words together until you get a sentence and keep doing that. The best relationships I see are the ones where each partner refuses to give up on the other. It's about equal give and take and allowing each other to be happy and loved." 
"So, on a scale of one to ten. How did we do, Doc?" Dean asked and it was Garth's turn to laugh. 
"I can't answer that, but I will say that you guys have a great foundation. We just want to open the lines of communication as a safety net for when times are a little tougher to see through the fog. When your love is hidden behind the walls you use to protect yourselves. You don't need to protect yourselves from each other; I can see that as much as you both can feel it." Garth said, buttoning his tweed jacket as he stood up. "We all need a little help sometimes and that's why you're here, you can't be expected to get through this without it. Whether I be the one to help you both, or you turn to friends, or family, it doesn't matter as long as you find your way back to each other in the end. Never forget that you are going through this together and the best thing you can do is communicate that. Sometimes one partner may feel like they're hurting more or they are more to blame and that's not true, we need to communicate to know." 
"I got it, Doc, next session you want me to talk more." Dean quipped as he stood up with you and added, "I gotta know, what the hell is that?" He pointed to the sock puppet on Garth's desk in the corner. It had yarn for hair, blue button eyes and red lips. 
"That is Mr. Frizzles," Garth laughed with a hand on his stomach, "Sometimes couples bring their kids to the session and the kids respond better to him than me. He insists it's his sense of humour but I think it's his uncanny ability to sense when someone is being a liar." Dean just stared at him and Garth laughed again, "I'm kidding, Dean." 
"I like him," Dean said as you walked to the car together. "That's something I never thought I'd say." 
Dean opened your door, "Me, too." You said, sliding into your seat. When Dean joined you in the Impala moments later you added, "So, you'd be open to going to another session?" 
"I'm open to anything you want, sweetheart. We're in this together." Dean revved up Baby and headed towards home. 
"Dean, I don't want you to keep things from me anymore." Dean side eyed you with a curious look, "The adoption thing... If that's something you're interested in, I want to be included. Maybe it's the right direction for us. I just don't want you to ever feel like you have to hide things from me, especially things you want." 
"I wasn't hiding it, I was always planning on telling you about it but, I dunno, the longer I waited the more awkward it was to bring it up." Dean said and you grabbed his hand from the seat next to you. You gave his fingers a squeeze and he smiled. "The people I consider my family -aside from Sammy- that's you, Bobby and Jody, Cas and Benny, you're all people I found; people I choose to keep around through thick and thin. And I love you all, some more than others," he gave you a flirty wink and smirked, "But my point is when it comes to kids, biological or adopted, I don’t care as long as they’re ours. Family wouldn’t mean the same thing to me without you... So please stop pushing me away.” 
You nodded and vowed, “I promise,” then leaned over to peck a kiss on his cheek, his stubble prickling your lips. “Maybe we can go over what you learned on adoption tomorrow?” 
“Of course, Y/N, I’d love to.” He beamed and planted a kiss to the back of your hand. 
“You’re all kinds of awesome, you know that?” You squeezed his fingers again until he squeezed back. 
“Whatever happened to ‘strange and kinda wonderful’?” He teased and chuckled with you. 
“I love you... my strange and kinda wonderful man.” 
“I love you more, don’t forget that.” Dean smirked and bit his lip like he always used to when you were younger. 
You glared at him a moment as he grinned sideways at you. He knew you hated it when he said things like that. Your love for him was just as strong, arguably stronger according to you. 
“Pfft, hardly.” You declared with an eye roll. “Exactly what makes you think that you love me more? I was willing to see you with another woman just so you could have a chance at happiness and you wouldn’t even consider it.” 
“Isn’t that proof right there?” He laughed at you. 
“But it would make me happy to see you happy so-” 
Dean stopped laughing and cut you off, “I’m happy with you and only you.” He glanced over at you a couple times before he asked, “Are you still happy with me?” 
“You know I am.” 
“Good, then I’m yours and your mine and our future will be what we make of it.” He slid his rough fingers between yours and cleared his throat. “You tamed my heart a long time ago, it would be cruel to throw me back into the wild now. Got it?” 
You smiled, feeling whole for the first time in a while, “You’re right. I think I’ll keep you after all.” 
Dean chuckled. 
Whatever happened next you were in it together. 
_________________________
This series is complete.
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_________________________ Dean: @akshi8278 @laycblack @thoughts-and-funnies @mrsjenniferwinchester @crustycheeks @kazsrm67 @sexyvixen7 @lyarr24 @suckitands33  @eliwinchester99 @yvonneeeee @igotmajordaddyissues @djs8891 @leigh70 @globetrotter28 @backseat-of-deans-67chevy
SPN: @hobby27
Wild Hearts: @justrealizedimmascifygurl @evieluvsjamie @kimberkingrivers @vicmc624 @ladysparkles78 @deans-spinster-witch
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So…. Guess what I’m currently rewatching😬
Are there any supernatural fans among you? I’d be delighted :D
Have a fantastic Sunday !✨🌻💚
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jawritter · 1 year
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Carry ON
Chapter 1
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Summary: It was just a simple hunt, found on a pie festival. It was supposed to be easy. Something they’d all done one hundred and one times a million. No one could have told Y/N, Dean, and Sam that nothing from that point on would ever be the same again.
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader x Sam Winchester
Word Count: 3890
Warnings: Heavy, HEAVY TW: Dean’s final episode of SPN. (Season 15x20 spoilers). Graphic injury. Me botching medical jargon, A lot of pain, blood, and hospital type atmosphere. Injured Dean Winchester. Angst. 
A/N: 1   I decided to kind of graze over the ‘death scene’ as it where, rather than focus on it because a lot of people find it very triggering, and even though the whole point of this fic is to have him survive it, I don’t want to trigger someone with having to mentally relive it.
Due to the graphic nature of this fic, and the fact that it will eventually contain Smut. This fic is an 18 + only fic! If you’re under 18 DO NOT read this fic!
A/N: 2 This fic is beta’d by @kazsrm67 Thanks so much love! Please do not copy my work! Feedback is golden! I hope you all enjoy this ride with me!
My Mastlist        Series Masterlist
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Y/N was always a firm believer in a feeling of admonition, or a forewarning of sorts. Those feelings way deep down that tell you that something, somewhere down the path you’re currently walking, will go very, VERY, wrong. She’d been a hunter too long, and she’d seen a lot, but a lot of times, those forewarning premonitions of sorts, well, they had saved her life on many occasions.
She had that very same feeling when Sam Winchester called her, and asked for her assistance on what they believed was a ring of vampires stealing kids to raise for blood slaves. Literally the vampire version of ‘growing your own food’. He claimed that it was going to be an easy hunt that he and Dean had stumbled on while at a pie festival, and that he simply wanted to make sure that he’d had the hunters needed so that they weren’t outmanned.  There was something deep down inside of her gut that screamed this hunt, this very hunt she was packing her bags for, would leave her rendered forever changed, and that something was going to go very wrong indeed, or that this thing would hit so damn close to the heart as it did. 
She’d known the Winchesters for a little over a decade, and from the moment she’d met them, she’d fallen head over heels for the green eyed Winchester that seemed to always be just out of her reach. Whether it be because he was with another woman, or the fact that she was quite invisible to him, she didn’t know. A lot of the time, it did feel like Dean never even saw her, no matter how much she worked with them, or what she did to gain his attention. What she did know was that every time Sam called her, she’d go, if for nothing else, to spend just a little time with the man that literally had her heart from ‘hello’.
Y/N had never believed in love at first sight before. Hell, as a hunter, she thought love itself was the one human lore that was utter bullshit, and it was something she shouldn’t think about. Boy, did Dean test that belief from the moment she’d met him. 
Still, she never thought she’d witness what she was going to witness, not from something as generic as a vampire hunt. Something they had all done time and time again, being seasoned hunters. Something that, until they walked through the doors of that Goddamn barn had gone so simply, so old school, that she wasn’t even really needed, and that the boys could have taken this very standard hunt on their own. If someone would have told her what was about to happen, and what was to come, she probably would have told them that they were lying. 
Now, there were some things that were vivid in her mind leading up to the series of unfortunate events; warning signs that her subconscious wouldn’t let her focus on. Just like there was, and will always be, a lot of unanswered questions in her mind, because again, she simply couldn’t remember everything that had happened before her eyes, it all happened so fucking fast.
What she could remember however, was the sickening thud as she and Sam fought a vamp not ten feet away from where Dean was jostled onto that post and piece of rebar that had been protruding out from it. What she did remember, was standing back in utter horror as she watched Sam and Dean say their final goodbyes; as Dean’s vision started to fail him, his breath became harder and harder to take, and his body started to tremble as he gave into his sheer state of shock. She remembered the pain in his voice increasing, and she remembered the fear that he did his damndest to keep under control so that his baby brother wouldn’t panic. That she remembers very clearly. She remembered every fucking word they’d said to one another, and more than that, she remembered feeling very, VERY, helpless, the most helpless she’d ever felt in her life.
All as she watched Dean start to succumb to what surely was the excruciating pain; the cough got worse, his breaths became more and more shallow, as his words became harder and harder to say, while his strength started to fail him. She also vividly remembered the flashing lights and sirens as Dean’s head dropped onto Sam’s shoulder, and his consciousness failed him. 
What she didn’t remember was calling the ambulance, even though she clearly had, because the phone was in her hand with the voice of the 911 operator playing in her head like a white noise of some kind, there, but not really there. 
She didn’t remember the police taking pictures of the bodies that littered the dirty barn floor, sporting the mask that they had in their sketches. Just like she didn’t remember telling them that Dean was her husband, and that they were working as undercover FBI agents when the fight escalated, and Dean was tossed onto the rebar that was impaling him, but she did it. 
Y/N did remember the sound of the saw as they cut through the post holding him up because his back was fused tight against the rod with the blow of sheer force he was shoved onto the object. She remembered helping Sam and others hold him up and support his weight as they laid him down on his side, a chunk of wood and rebar still in his back. 
She also remembered a lot of yelling, so much yelling. Sam was yelling at a cop. The EMT’s were yelling at one another debating over which hospital had a big enough trauma center to take him to so that he might even remotely have a chance to survive. She remembered the sound of the helicopter as it landed in the field just outside the barn as so many hands worked to stabilize him. She did hear words being yelled like pneumothorax, and someone saying they needed to relieve the chest cavity of blood. Then there was talk of a possible spinal injury, but they wouldn't let her get close enough to see what they were doing to him. 
What she will absolutely never forget is the horrors that were running through her head as they cut his shirt from his chest, and his lifeless looking face and slacked jaw while his head lulled sickeningly on the gurney while they worked frantically to save his life. Thoughts of him surely not surviving this. Thoughts of being wheel chair bound, and fuck knows what else, IF he lived at all. 
She will forever remember doing her damndest to run with the gurney, Sam running along the other side of it, as they rolled him to the helicopter, or the crushing feeling in her chest as she stood there next to Sam watching it take off with her heart in the damn thing, and only a slim chance, if there really was any at all, that he’d make it, or if he would take his last breath in the air. 
There it was again, that completely sickening, helpless feeling as her legs gave out from under her, and Sam caught her before her ass could hit the ground. She’d been through a lot. She’d seen a lot. She’d been hunting ever since she was sixteen years old, but she never, NEVER, thought she would see something as horrific as this. 
The last thing she doesn’t remember doing, is riding in the Impala while Sam drove them both to Akron General, but it was what the sign said as they climbed out of the car and ran inside the hospital, only to be directed to a waiting area with white walls and hard chairs. So, she assumed that was the name of the place. 
She vaguely remembered a nurse handing her a cup of water, and asking her questions about Dean, questions a wife would know, and honestly, she knew none of them, thankfully the nurse passed that off as shock while Sam answered and filled out questionnaire after questionnaire with trembling hands. If he was in as much shock as she was, he was holding it together well, because she felt like she was about to fall to pieces any second. 
After that, the nurses left, telling the pair that Dean had been taken into emergency surgery, and a doctor would be in as soon as it was over to talk to them. That’s where she found herself now. In a small, white room, with uncomfortable furniture, a sick stomach, and a chest that felt like it was about to cave in with every breath she took, and the most suffocating silence she’d ever heard in her life. 
Sam said nothing to her, he just sat across the room, picking at the blood on his hands while her mind tried to replay what happened in order to make sense of it all over and over again as the hours wore on, and she was pretty sure time stopped moving at all. It was maddening. 
“Shouldn’t they have come in and talked to us by now?” Y/N questioned after a while, the sound of her own voice making her jump. Honestly, it was barely above a whisper and she was so hoarse she didn’t even recognize her own self. How long had they been sitting there? 
“She said that they would come in and talk to us as soon as they were done,” Sam said, staring at her with a ghostly white look on his face. It made her wonder just what she looked like. Was she just as bad? Worse? 
“The damage was pretty extensive,” Sam continued, “they told me that his chances of even surviving the flight to the hospital were slim, so I can’t imagine what they saw when they got the rebar out of him. 
Y/N brought her hand up to her mouth to cover the sob that she could feel building in her chest, she’d cried so much that she was surprised that she was even able to cry anymore, but as the sheer shock started to wain and the exhaustion and stress took its place, it was honestly all she felt like she ever wanted to do again until she was able to see his face, cry. 
Sam swallowed so thickly that she could hear it across the room, and when he spoke again, his voice was much softer than it had been a few moments ago. Maybe she looked worse than what she thought she did?
“How long?” he questioned, and she ran her hand down her face and released the breath she was holding as she stared at him in confusion. 
“How long what?” 
“How long have you had feelings for my brother?” Sam asked, a ghost of a smile on his face, and all she could do was look down at her feet as a deep resounding wave of grief overtook her again. 
“How did you know?” she choked out, unable to look at him fully for a lot of reasons. The main one being that her feelings for Dean had been what she thought was her best kept secret in over a decade. She’d been with them on hunts countless times, she always made sure she was so careful to not let it show, and then he had to go and almost die on them tonight, and suddenly Sam was able to read her mail as if she left herself wide open and ready for the taking? It was almost cruel and unfair. 
“I was pretty sure I noticed it the night we all met up on that Skin Walker hunt for the first time,” Sam admitted, and she blushed furiously in spite of the turmoil inside of her.
“Dean asked to buy me a drink and I told him my girlfriend wouldn’t appreciate that because I was mad at him for flirting with the bartender instead of me,” Y/N laughed at the memory. Dean had thought for years that she actually had a girlfriend until Sam told him she was just dragging him on to get under his skin. In truth, she was just afraid to let him know how she really was feeling, she was afraid; she still was. 
Sam laughed to himself and ran his hand down his own face as his gaze drifted off towards the closed door. 
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen Dean so jaded as he was that night,” Sam chuckled, “he sulked for days after that.”
“He just wasn’t used to being told no,” Y/N corrected him with a half-hearted smirk, and Sam laughed with a nod of his head. 
“Maybe so,” he agreed as his eyes found hers again. “So, since night one huh?”
She could only nod. What was the use of hiding it from Sam now? When the likelihood that she’d never get to tell Dean just how she really felt about him was greater than the likelihood she’d get to see him smile again, and that fucking hurt, that hurt bad. 
“Hey,” Sam said, catching her attention as she leaned forward and covered her face with her hands. She could literally feel herself trembling as she tried to hold it together. The longer she sat not knowing, the harder that got. Each second felt more excruciating than the last, and honestly, she was about to go hunt down some nurses for some answers. She couldn’t accept that the last time she’d see him alive was as he looked over Sam’s shoulder to stare at her while he drew his last continuous breath, she just couldn’t.
“Dean cared about you too Y/N/N, a lot, and if he had time, I’m sure he would have told you that before… before this. He asked about you all the time. He was the one who wanted you to come on this hunt with us, and I think it was because he wanted to see you.”
Y/N swallowed the sudden lump in her throat; looked away as the grief gripped her again, and breathed deeply as she could to keep herself from falling apart. She was just about to argue that there was no way in hell he gave a damn about her, when there was a knock on the door, and a man in scrubs stepped inside, along with a nurse tailing closely behind him. Y/N and Sam stood to their feet, and waited with their hearts on the floors as the doctor closed the door behind him. 
“Mrs. Clearwater?” He questioned, and Y/N made a mental note to thank Sam for putting a name down that Dean might relate to enough if he woke up to play along at least until they could get him out of the hospital. 
“Yes, that’s me, and this is Dean’s brother Sam,” she introduced them and the doctor reached out his hand, shaking her own as well as Sam’s before pointing to the chairs for them all to take a seat. 
“My name is Dr. Martin, I was the attending surgeon for Dean tonight,” he informed, and Y/N was sure she was visibly shaking from head to toe as she waited. 
“Is he okay?” Sam asked, his own voice shaking. 
“He’s alive,” Dr. Martin informed them, “And stable. But he’s not out of the woods yet, Dean has a long, LONG, way to go.”
If Y/N wasn’t sitting down, even though she didn't remember sitting back down, she was sure her legs would have given out from under her form the sheer relief that he’d survived the surgery as well as the transport to the hospital. 
“Dean, is a very lucky man, had that rebar entered his body a little higher, well, we’d be having a completely different conversation, and still, it’s a miracle he’s still here at all. There was a lot of blood in his chest cavity by the time they got him here. The reason I didn’t come out and talk to you while they were stabilizing and preparing him for surgery was because as soon as the helicopter landed on the heliport, his left lung collapsed completely. Had he not been where he was by the time that happened– again, we’d be having a different conversation right now.”
“So, what are we looking at doc?” Sam questioned, Y/N could only swallow thickly, her voice failed her completely, and the doctor took a deep breath before patting Y/N on the back of the hand. 
“Hey, we’re not giving up on him, okay?” he attempted to reassure her. “The fact that he made it this far proves he’s a fighter, and we’re gonna do all we can to keep him as stable as possible while he recovers.”
Y/N could only nod, and Sam reached his arm around her to stabilize her as she swayed slightly in her seat. 
“I think she will feel a little better once she can see him,” Sam stated, “I think she’s still in shock.”
“Well, let me give you a run down of just what we’re facing, and then I will take you into our critical care unit where you can see him.” Dr. Martin reassured the pair of them, and she did breathe a sigh of relief and the promise of possibly seeing him soon. It did make her feel somewhat better that the next time she saw Dean, it wasn't going to be as a wrapped body prepared for a hunter’s funeral. 
“The rod didn’t hit any of his ribs on his left side but the force of the blow that impaled him to the pole in the first place was so hard that it fractured three of his ribs, the rod itself punctured his lung, and three of his vertebrae were also fractured. Somehow, and none of us really understand how, but no other vital organs seemed to be damaged, and the rod came to a stop before it could reach his heart. However, there was a lot of nerve and muscle damage.” 
Dr. Martin paused to make sure that the pair of them were still following him before he continued, that or to make sure Y/N wasn’t going to pass out, she wasn’t really. 
“I’m gonna dull this down to make it easier to understand, because, again, it’s a lot. Dean’s lung collapsed because of the large puncture wound created by the rebar, his left lung to be exact. I was able to repair the wound in the surgery once we got the bleeding under control, and I’ve placed some drain tubes to control the amount of oxygen in the chest cavity, as well as drain any fluid or remaining blood while he recovers. We run several risks just in this recovery, especially infection and pneumonia. I’ve got him on heavy IV antibiotics to help prevent that as well. Unfortunately, some of the muscle and nerve damage is something he’s going to have bad days and struggle with long after the recovery, but again, we are running a high risk of infection right now, and our goal is to keep him from bleeding anymore, or gaining an infection in the wound, internally or externally.”
“What about the three vertebrae that were fractured?” Sam questioned, “is he paralyzed, will he walk again?” 
“There is an impressive amount of swelling around the spinal cord because of the sheer trauma his body experienced, but the cord itself was not severed. He’s most likely unable to feel much from the chest down right now, but we’re hopeful that when the swelling goes down in a few weeks, that he will regain feeling in his lower extremities, and with a lot of rehab, because not only are we dealing with spine injuries, but also muscle and nerve damage, he’s going to have to spend a lot of time in rehab.”
Y/N didn’t know if she was relieved, or if she was more worried, and why the hell did it seem like this just kept getting worse and worse?
“Is he awake?” Y/N questioned; the doctor shook his head sadly. 
“No, I’ve placed him in a medically induced coma for several reasons. First, to keep him from even trying to move, because that could cause more harm than good right now, and if he tried to pull himself up with his arms for any reason, then he might tear some of the internal stitching, and bleed out. Also, his body has gone through a great deal of trauma. He was in a deep state of shock, he lost a lot of blood, and his body needs to recover. This is a way to keep him still, and keep his pain levels as low as possible, because if he were awake, his pain levels would be extremely high. I can assure you, it’s kinder right now to just allow him to sleep.”
Y/N looked down at her lap, and tried to control the wave of emotions that hit her in the gut. 
“How long will you keep him under?” Sam questioned, and the doctor let out a long, slow breath. 
“That kind of depends on him. I’m hopeful for no more than a week, and we can start to slowly wean him off. But right now, I assure you, he needs the rest. His lung needs to heal, and having him on the vent will help take the strain off. Right now, our biggest worry is infection. We don’t need him struggling to breathe, or be in excessive pain.”
The doctor stood, and so did Sam. 
“I’m sorry, I wish I had better news for the pair of you, but honestly, I can’t stress this enough, the man is lucky to be alive. He’s probably going to be in the ICU for a few weeks. But once he’s stable enough to move to a private room, we can start monitoring his recovery and Y/N will be able to stay in the room with her husband. Personally, I think he’s gonna need support when he wakes up, because this isn’t gonna be easy. Once he’s recovered, and is able, we will have him transferred to a rehab center to start his recovery. Right now, let’s just focus on getting him to remain stable, and past this window of infection, okay?”
Y/N nodded, so did Sam. 
“Okay, Rayne will take you to see him,” Dr. Martin said before bowing out of the door. “I will talk to you again soon, so will some of his other doctors and attendings, but I will be in as well to monitor his progress.”
So here it was, day one of the rest of Dean’s life, and hers, because Y/N made her mind up as they all boarded the elevator in route to see Dean, there was no way in hell she was leaving him and going back home. She’d stay and see this through until the end. No matter how long it took. No matter how hard it was. She was going to be there for him, whether he wanted her to be when he woke up or not. 
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thefriendlypigeon · 6 months
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"Found You!"
Annoying awkward small human boyfriend climbed the giant radio tower to meet his angel 🥺
Another giant!Cas artwork, yay! Here's the series.
Prints available here!
👉COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN👈
[my social media links]
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The inspiration has struck for something finally... 👀👀👀
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Not sure when I will start posting this. I do want to finish What Once Was before I do and I've been stalled on it... I'm hoping to wrap it up soon though.
I just wanted you to know stuff is in the works!
Also, if you have prompts or requests, I'd be happy to write for them. They'd help with my writing block! ❤️
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