#diary of a wimpy kid headcanons

[ch9rm]

Rodrick Heffley headcanons

CW: fem!reader, masturbation, semi public, fingering, handjob, oral 18+ minors DNI (a/n: this is my first public work in a burning hot minute. right now i don't take request but i'm working on it. i hope this isn't too bad)

divider by: @pommecita

SFW

He loves physical touch

Any chance he has at touching you he takes it

Your hand, thigh, hair, butt, etc

He also loves to kiss

Not really on the lips but hands, cheeks and forehead

Speaking of forehead kisses he will melt if you kiss him on his forehead and stroke his hair

It's a dangerous combo

Will make a playlist for any and everything

“This is from our first date, and these are the songs we've kissed to...”

He is just like a little puppy in public

He always has to drag you to look at things he knows he doesn't need

“But pleaseeee, i’ll find a place for it, babyyyyy”

NSFW

Boobs.

His favorite place to put his hands and face is your boobs

You can never go a day without him having some sort of interaction with them

Similarly, he can't go one day without you blowing him or jerking him

Sometimes you two will sneak away to the record store bathroom to fulfill your wicked desires

“You just couldn't wait till we got back home huh?”

Rod loves having his long fingers buried in your cunt

The sounds you make while he brushes your cervix drives him crazy

“You're doing so good for me sweetheart, keep making those noises, tell me how good my fingers feel”

He’s more of a slow and sensual man when he has the time

You guys will make out and touch each other for hours

He'll go between your thighs and leave butterfly kisses all over them before plunging his tongue into your cavern. 

When you're not around Rod finds himself with his hand down his shorts thinking about what you two did the other night

He's always thinking about you and your body

Aftercare consist of warm blankets, movies, and shoulder kisses

He just can't get enough of you

[goatcheesecak3]

I'm so excited you're taking requests, AHH! Could you possibly write some hcs for cuddling w/ Rodrick :0

I would absolutely love to write this, thank you for the idea! And thank you for being my first ever request :^)

Without further ado, here's my headcanons for cuddling with Rodrick, enjoy!

He likes it when you lay on his chest while watching a film, he always jokes that he's your pillow and you're his blanket.

He likes it even more when he's laying on your chest, nuzzling his face into you just to be as close as humanly possible. In all honesty, sometimes it feels like he's trying to burrow into your skin.

He's very needy, while he lays on your chest he'll often whinge and say things like "if you really loved me you'd be playing with my hair right now", and if you stop he whines and sleepily pulls your hand back to his head.

Sometimes he likes to be the little spoon, pressing his back into your chest as much as he can, because once again, even when you're as close as humanly possible it's never close enough for him.

When he's the little spoon you lean over and give him lots of little kisses on his cheek and in the crook of his neck, causing him to let out happy little sleepy hums.

He likes for you to be the little spoon most of the time, not because he's being assertive or protective or anything, but because he loves treating you as his teddy bear. He holds you incredibly tight- maybe even too tight sometimes- and if you have to get up for whatever reason he pouts and whines until you go back.

His constant need for cuddles isn't limited to when you're behind closed doors. When you're hanging out with his friends after band practice he always makes sure you're sat on his lap, his arms hugging round your waist and his head leaning on your shoulder.

Sometimes he lets himself get so clingy that it's almost a pain (but he's too cute for you to be mad at him). When you're cooking sometimes he'll come into the kitchen and hug you from behind, watching curiously as you cook and asking lots of questions - and nearly getting both of you burnt in the process because he's completely oblivious to hot pans and stoves.

Sometimes he likes to snuggle up next you, clinging onto one of your arms like a teddy. When he feels bored or like he hasn't got enough attention for a while he'll playfully bite your arm, which you know is your cue to start giving him affection. "Aw come here my handsome man" patting your chest for him to snuggle up closer.

He falls asleep on you all the time, and he snores and mumbles in his sleep. If he isn't laying on your arms sometimes you take your phone and record it to embarass him with later, although secretly you find it adorable.

That's all I got for now! I really hope you enjoyed, and I hope I did my first ever request some justice :^)

[embodyingchaos]

Heyy

So can I ask van u do a Roderick hcs??? If u do tysm

❥ hii there, hun! of course, i can! i wasn't sure if you wanted general headcanons or dating headcanons, so i did both! hope this is okay! (im so sorry this is so short and LATE)

general/dating rodrick headcanons warnings: kissing, awkward roddy

okay so i feel like you would meet rodrick most likely at school and when you do he won’t warm up to you immediately

then once you bring up rock/punk music or anything emo he’ll be like ALL EARS and just start yapping away

i feel like rodrick would be a bit unintentionally mean/rude because he doesn’t think before he speaks but it could also be because he’s trying to impress you ykyk

he’ll tell you about his band of course, and invite you to every damn band practice but you don’t mind obviously

then if he develops a crush on you, he’ll try to play it smooth and cool and ultimately fail because he’s a huge ass goofball

and you’ll probably be able to tell bc you aren’t that dumb, so when he confesses you’ll be like “...i know.” and he’ll be like “whaaa??” LMAO

FOR YOUR FIRST DATE HE’LL BE SO CLICHE LIKE A MOVIE THEN DINNER AT A FAST FOOD PLACE and yall just end the night

OH OH you guys would end the night by laying on the top of his van and just stargazing quietly together or smth

you’d try to kiss his cheek when he drops you off at your house but he accidentally turns and you kiss his lips instead and yall just blush SO MUCH AAAA

this is all i have i apologise

[idonotwanttogrowupbitch]

Rodrick Heffley fluff alphabet.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

when you start dating this man is not at all affectionate, he doesn't really know what to do, he never had a girlfriend before and doesn't want to do something that you will feel uncomfortable with but when the relationship progresses he has more confidence to do things, he will hold your hand, hug you and give you kisses, this man can be very romantic.

if you were best friends before you started dating, its completly different, i actually made headcanons about that here.

B = Body (what is their favorite part of your body?)

He obviously love every part of your body, but, if he have to choose one (without being sexual) your hands, oh man he loves them, every chance he gets he will hold your hand and intertwine your fingers, he likes it and does it without realizing it when you are close, he also leaves little kisses on them from time to time, and if you caress his face he will probably bite them or kiss them, you'll never know he's next movement.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Yes .Always , believe me when I tell you that this man IS the most clingy in the relationship, probably initiating most of the cuddle sessions.

D= Dates (What are dates with them like?)

PARADISE, dates with this man are the best thing in the world, he will always try to make sure you both have a good time, even if you don't leave the house, just spending time together is more than enough for him, for sure all of them include food and music, believe me when I tell you that you will ALWAYS have a good time.

E = Equal (Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?)

he thinks he is the dominant one but both you and he knows he is not, maybe at the beginning of the relationship he will be like "I am the man and I will protect you, I'm very cool" but as time goes by he will let himself go more for you, he will keep doing things like opening the door for you to come in or leaving you his jacket if you are cold but you will be the one guiding the relationship (mostly because you are the more mature one, probably).

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Thinking of you as his wife is somethign he loves , fantasizes about it and probably proposed to you a million times , literally for anything, you would just hand him the class notes and he would be like "please marry me", but he wouldn't really be aware of the commitment of a marriage.

G= Gratitude (How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?)

He is very appreciative of what his partner does for him and is very grateful and feels very lucky to have them and tells them when he can, but at some point in the relationship after dating for a long time he would inadvertently start to take his partner for granted, without realizing it he simply stopped seeing the things you do for him becoming even distant or "ungrateful" looking like only you put effort into the relationship, you would talk and he would definitely feel very guilty he would hug you and not let go for like 15 hours, he will definitely be much more attentive to you and what you do for this relationship, he will also contribute by making everything equitable, this relationship will make this man mature really.

it would be the only serious disscusion you could ever have.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Remember when i said he is the one who start the cuddle sessions? well, there's your answer, this man LOVES hugs, but only your hugs, and probably hugs you most of the time, every time he got the chance he do it (especially from behind)

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Hard to believe or not, I don't think he says it so fast, probably after you went out a few times while you were listening to music in his van he just looked at you sweetly and when you turned to look at him he just said "I love you" (his most romantic moment for sure).

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

A lot, he sees that a guy talks to you and automatically stands next to you and say "hi honey" and then he will tell the guy that he IS your boyfriend, but it is mostly because he is insecure and not because he distrusts you, he is afraid that you will find someone better than him and change him (he'll never admit it) but after you show him that he is ENOUGH the jealousy calms down and little by little disappears.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

The first kiss was awkward what can I tell you, he was nervous and stealing a kiss from you was not his best choice (he almost broke a tooth) and in the beginning of the relationship most of the kisses were short and sweet (mostly because he didn't know how to ) but with time when you try something more passionate he learns little by little and ends up being a VERY good kisser.

L= Love Confession (How would they confess to their s/o?)

It was very cute but still awkward, you know, Rodrick style, You two had been classmates for a while and Rodrick had always liked you, so one day he just came up to you and said (while being such a blushing mess):

"hi y/n"

"oh, Rodrick, hi, what's up?"

"I was wondering if.... well, yes, if... youwouldliketogooutwithmeonedayyouareaverycoolgirlandIwouldliketogooutwithyouonlyifyouwanttoofcourse,itwouldbeverycoolifyoualsowanttoyouknowasfriendsorsomethingelse."

"sure..."

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Lazy and affectionate, if you stayed to sleep with him in his house you have to be clear that as soon as you get into his bed you will not get out of there ever unless you necessarily have to, Rodrick will hug you or fall asleep on you and you can not get up, when you finally get rid of that and you get up and get to go to the bathroom or something be sure that he will either go looking for you or start calling you to come back with him

N = Nicknames  (What do they call their s/o?)

More often babe but if he's joking or he wants to get your attention, he'll say something super specific and clingy like "my sweet gummi gum".

O = On Cloud Nine (What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?)

It's VERY obvious that Rodrick is in love, even if he didn't say anything everyone knows he is in love and of whom is in love. He literally can't stop looking at you when you are around and will definitely try to get your attention or hit on you with his eyes making everyone around him notice his crush and when you are together he shows you off to everyone (literally) so everyone knows who is Rodrick Heffley's girlfriend and crush.

P = PDA  (Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss when others are watching?)

Remember I said that everyone knows who Rodrick Heffley's girlfriend is? As soon as you start dating this man screams that you are together, he wouldn't deny your relationship for the world.

As far as public pda I have only one thing to say and that is DEFINITELY, this man would make out with you in public if you let him, he is not denying anything, the limit is set by you.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Being honest, he wouldn't remember every little detail of things you tell him but he is an attentive boyfriend he remembers your favorite ice cream, your favorite song, what you don't like and what you do, if he forgets something important you told him (or your anniversary) he will apologize for like 5 minutes straight even if you tell him it doesn't matter to him (in general he cares about you a lot)

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

He doesn't have a particular favorite since he enjoys every moment he spends with you but if he had to choose it would be the time he teach you how to play the drums (although maybe he doesn't say it or express it, he love every second of that day).

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Not too much, he makes sure you are always well and cares about you but he also knows that you can do it on your own.

as for him he doesn't like you to protect him too much (he loves it) or at least not in public because he doesn't want people to think he's not cool.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts?)

Although the dates look very simple, he really tries hard to make you have a good time with him, and if it's your anniversary, even more so, although he would end up taking you to the amusement park or something like that, he is romantic in his own way.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

this man has a lot of bad habits, he sleeps badly, it's not that he doesn't sleep but that he sleeps too much, eating habits (unhealthy food and that somedays he barely eat because he was sleeping all day) and his dubious hygiene (I still love you Rodrick).

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

50/50

he wants to look cool but we all know how little he cares about his hygiene, probably after he met you he started to bathe more often

he worries about what he wears and how his hair looks, he always wants to look cool you know, I see him in front of the mirror for 45 minutes trying to do his eyeliner with his mother's eyeliner.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Probably yes, and even more if you have been dating for a long time.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He LOVES when you do his eyeliner for him, always ask you to do it, although it is still a difficult task because he doesn't keep his eyes closed because he wants to see you and he says many things that will make you laugh or break your concentration + he is not completly still (he's an earthquake) so what was a 5 minute task becomes a 30 minute one.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

I don't think he'll wouldn't like something in a partner but in general probably public PDA with another person than you, he loves when you do it because he wants everyone to know you are his girlfriend but if Greg or Susan hug him in public he would be embarrased.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

I had already mentioned it and it is something we all know but even so, this man sleeps too much he can sleep 72 hours straight also having a very heavy sleep, there could be an earthquake or explosions and he would still not woke up.

i know i've been dissapeared for a long time but i still hope you like this <3

[alt-froggy13]

RODRICK DATING HEAD-CANONS

idk why but i feel like no matter who you are, it would go from enemies to friends to lovers or just friends to loves

you two constantly play with eachothers hair (mostly you playing with Rodricks)

you sit on his lap and do his eyeliner for fun or while blasting music (until you get yelled at to turn it down)

you two listen to mcr together till there are no more songs left to listen to

you watch his band practice/play (mostly to see him play drums cuz he looks hot when doing it)

he calls you babe, dear, darling, and lovely but mostly babe

when hes around others he pull the "im a bad boy" but when you guys are alone he spoils you, baby talk, constant cuddles, kisses, hes soft around you

you two would always go on "drives" and make out in the back of his van

if your reckless like him expect him to jokingly baby you whenever you get hurt "aww baby did you get a boo boo" - "rodrick i swear"

sorry this was short hope you enjoyed <33

[i-killed-a-prostutute]

rodrick heffley walked so Eddie Munson could run

☠️😈🖤🤘🏻🚙🎸🥁⛓️

[rs8ndead]

❛ Drummer boy ❜

" anyone tell you you’re pretty..? "

── ﹙ 𝜗𝜚 ‧₊˚ MASTERLIST&INFO.﹚. ☆

→﹐ 𓏵﹒ SUMMARY.﹒⟢ ⸻ dating Rodrick <3

→﹐ 𓏵﹒ PAIRING.﹒⟢ ⸻ rodrick heffley x gender neutral reader

→﹐ 𓏵﹒ A/N.﹒⟢ ⸻ comments & reblogs urged⠀·⠀request a bot⠀★☆ I have written all of this out just from the pure boredom that I go through on a constant, daily basis, and because I have am also very touched starved for affection and bored and want to write and I have a constant fuel for writing and for roleplaying, but I have so many google doc’s for my original characters that I have to finish and i wanna get into a friend group without getting to weird and to attached to other people. Anyways I have no brain cells to write a proper sentence nor do I have the proper brain cells to come up with some jaw dropping title that will make people go like “oh wow that’s a super cool title… wish I came up with that title” BUT NOOOOOOO I came up with drummer boy, and it’s going to stay like that for a while until I come up with something better. I’m going to make a bot for these headcanons by the way THEYRE TO GOOD RO NOT MAKE BOTS FOR. Anyways I have to go back to school tomorrow because I accidentally stepped on my glasses and the leg came off and then another day the other leg of my glasses randomly fell off so I almost missed an entire week and now I am being informed I’m going back to school tomorrow so I have to switch bags because I’m not going back to school having a juicy couture bag and a plush backpack while having the face of an abomination because I’ll just look like some weird weeb with an anime fetish and I also have to make a bunch of focuses for my apps so nobody knows my deepest darkest secret: I run a tumblr blog and post headcanons and all that stuff. I have so much on my plate right now but it’s okay. I’m sorry if any of the bots are weird with their replies, IM SORRY😭

→﹐ 𓏵﹒ TAGLIST﹒⟢ ⸻ none ( ;´ - `;)

→﹐ 𓏵﹒ WHO REQUESTED.﹒⟢ ⸻ no one ( ;´ - `;)

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ © ❛ rs8ndead . she/her

🥁  ⸺  Rodrick, who’s like a touch starved puppy, always following his lover around as if he were afraid of losing them if he were to be separated from them.

୨୧ ᵎᵎ ﹐﹒⟡﹒

🥁  ⸺  literal definition of ‘written by a woman’ that’s been mashed up with a touch starved puppy who just wants some belly rubs along with an emo guy. He’ll follow his partner around, offering to carry their stuff and also compliment his partner because LISTENNN. he’s a very yappery type of man when it comes to complimenting his partner, and I think he’d have quite the emotional attachment to his partner

୨୧ ᵎᵎ ﹐﹒⟡﹒

🥁  ⸺ if his partner likes music playing at their birthday parties ( IF HIS PARTNER CELEBRATES THEIR BIRTHDAY ) then Rodrick will make subtle hints at him wanting to have his band perform at his partners birthday party, from nudging their shoulder and stuff, and if his partner doesn’t get the hint then he will practically go on his knees and beg his partner to let him play for their birthday party ( please do, he’ll make it worth it. )

୨୧ ᵎᵎ ﹐﹒⟡﹒

🥁  ⸺ most likely would have the mentality of a freshman attempting to appear cool to the upper grades, he’d try to steal things from stores that his significant other shops at and if he’s confronted about it by his partner he’ll be all like “whattttt?? pschhh.. no, I didn’t stea- yeah I stole.” He can’t help but tell the truth to his partner, he hates lying to them. I MADE A BOT FOR THIS HEADCANON

୨୧ ᵎᵎ ﹐﹒⟡﹒

🥁  ⸺ best. person. to gossip with!! ( if his partners into that ), he’ll probably forget about it almost immediately so don’t worry about him telling others about it, and it’s not like he has people to tell it to ( except for his band mates, who would be brushing him off and be like “he’s in love love😭” )

୨୧ ᵎᵎ ﹐﹒⟡﹒

🥁  ⸺ when he’s hanging out with his band, he’ll sometimes be like “I miss them,” “it’s been what, a few minutes without them?”

୨୧ ᵎᵎ ﹐﹒⟡﹒

🥁  ⸺ I like to think that he would read some very cheesy poetry to his lover from his lovers window, not poetry that he’s came up with be because he’s obviously to dumb for that, but he’ll read some poetry from a poetry book while some flower petals of his partners favorite flowers are scattered all over him and he’d definitely have one of his bandmates Chris or Ben hiding somewhere and spraying water on him to make it seem like it’s raining for it to be very dramatic as he’s busy trying to pronounce words that are out of his vocabulary while the pages are getting wet from the water spraying onto it, because of him looking at the book most of the time while he’s trying to read to his partner sappy love poetry, he looks like a pastor ( he didn’t memorize the poetry which was his plan, but OOPS!!!!!! he didn’t remember. ) I MADE A BOT FOR THIS HEADCANON

୨୧ ᵎᵎ ﹐﹒⟡﹒

🥁  ⸺ he burns cd’s for his partner, 100%, definitely, he’s an emo or either punk guy, NO DOUBT ( I love that band they’re super good but that’s not the point ), his first ever burned cd given to his partner had some cheesy line written on it ( “drowning in your eyes”, thanks to his mom happily helping him make it up ) along with their initials and the day they would both get together, so for like example: ‘drowning in your eyes: R+V & 2/14/13’ ( my OC’s initial + the day Rodrick and her got together ), and the songs that Rodrick would burn onto the cd would be ‘I’m not okay ( I promise )’, ‘Vampires will never hurt you’ + ‘This is the best day ever’ all by My Chemical Romance, ‘last night on earth’ by Green Day, ‘the middle’ by Jimmy Eat World, along with some favorite songs of his partner that he’s taken the time to learn. HERES THE LINK TO THE PLAYLIST !! & I MADE A BOT FOR THIS HEADCANON

୨୧ ᵎᵎ ﹐﹒⟡﹒

🥁  ⸺ like a schoolgirl in love, in private he’s a giggling mess about his partner and kicking his feet up, but quickly switches sides if someone walks in on him and denies over and over, even if they find out. “Deny deny deny, even if they find out… deny.”

@rs8ndead

[urmomsmainbitch]

rodrick dating a swiftie!reader

requested: yes / no

warnings: i dont think any?? mental health tw in a/n

pronouns: nothing specific

a/n: hey guys so i'm not dead! in all honestly i locked myself out of this account, so i couldn't finish writing all of the requests from the last time i checkded in account. my home life has been kind of a shit show the past few months, but now that i found the password, i feel like writing might pull me out of the hole i've been in recently. if i dissappear again don't worry -- i def j locked myself out again :) also, i'm not a huge taylor fan, so i tried my best!

okay so basically

rodrick was not a swiftie at ALL before meeting you

like, he heard it on the radio and at school, but he never like went seeking out taylor swift

but the very SECOND he met you, he immideatly started looking up what songs she was famous for

id like to think that rodrick's love langauge is music (don't think i'm using that term right but whatevs)

and that he immideatly told you that he was trying taylor swift

and he listened to basically EVERYTHING.

the next time he saw you

all he did was talk about taylor swift with tou

something was just so adborable about seeing your face light up when he mentioned that he listened to her "because he wanted to think about you, and taylor swift makes him think of you"

tim mcgraw asf!

[lifesteal-headcanons]

mapicc wears makeup. specifically, he wears makeup the way Rodrick Heffley wears makeup.

thank you for your time

- 🗿

(for context)

[yourslvtywhor3]

everyones favorite emoooo rodirck heffleyyyyyyyy ❤️‍🔥

NOT PROOF READ OR EDITED

~~~he must have a hand on you at all times bc he wants you to feel safe from his crazy ass rock friends especially bill

~~~his mom hates your guy's relationship, but its not her life

~~~ rodrick knows your insecure and he wants you to know that he's there for you in every way possible even if you were in another country

~~~he says this alot " yea me and y/n are gonna have good lookin kids because their hot asf and i have the great drumming skill ya know , so thats how you know ours kids are gonna pull"

~~~ the way this man grabs your thigh is actually like omgggggg girl you know damn well after a minutes its a whole pond down there....

~~~cuddles and morning kisses he love you kiss your puffy face good morning because he like to see how flustered you get

~~~sleepovers every weekend like you both know damn well to behave because your parents know exactly what to take away if you misbehave (if that even made sense)

~~~ ok yall remember that scene in the movie where there at the roller skate thingie? yea ok. so when you guys went you and rodrick went roller skating and he was grabbing your waist for support so he doesn't fall and because he wants to make sure you don't fall either

~~~he loves to watch you swim like when you guys go to the pool during family trips you guys are splashing each other play fighting in the water

~~~ he went with you to get your bellybutton pierced because why not tf

~~~ lets be fr here you're the smart one in the relationship and your helping rodrick get his grades up and its working

~~~ you like art so when your with him you like to kiss him but his face gets dirty because of the pastel oils you have on your hands

~~~ LETS BE HONEST HERE WHO THE FUCKED DIDNT HAVE A CRUSH ON RODRICK WHEN THEY WERE A KID LIKE IF YOU DIDNT YOU ARE WEIRD AS FUCK BRO LIKE THIS MANNNNNNNN AGGHHHHHHH

~~~ so when yall do that lets be fr here he likes the cowgirl position

~~~ hes a boob guy thats it no arguing

~~~ sometimes he pinches your ass because he likes to hear you screech and turn around and hit his chest

~~~ you his everything and he lets you know that every day he will text you paragraphs on how much he loves you and how he never want to lose you.

I WOULD APPRICIATE IF YOU LIKE AND FOLLOW TO HELP A SMALL CREATOR OUT BC Y NOT 😊

[ur-fav-is-autistic]

greg heffley autistic ;0

Greg Heffley from Diary of a Wimpy Kid is Autistic!

[goatcheesecak3]

Could you possibly write something small about a beach date with Rodrick 😍

Rodrick x reader

Sorry this took so long! Me mam tried to sell me to one direction so I was slightly preoccupied 🙄

Anyways enough jibber jabber, here's a lil fluff about a beach date with Rodrick :^)

The heffleys had invited you on a trip to the beach, since you and Rodrick had been together for some time now, it was pretty much routine for you to come along to family events at this point.

You and Rodrick drove in his van separately from everyone else, truth be told, you were relieved. You loved the heffleys but you weren't so keen on the music they played in the car.

"You excited babe?" Rodrick turned to look at you

"Can't wait! I was looking up the beach on Google, there's quite a few rock pools so we might see some cool sealife!"

Rodrick's face lit up at this

"Like a crab?!" He asked

"Yes honey, like a crab" you smiled at your easily amused boyfriend.

"Awesome. I fucking love crabs" he said.

Upon arrival Susan and Frank were happy to see the pair of you, they both approached to greet you, when seemingly out of nowhere Greg appeared, flinging his arms around you.

"Hey lil dude! Nice to see you" You beamed down at him

"Great to see you too! I've got all the stuff set up!" He replied excitedly

You were confused for a second, before looking just past him and seeing an abundance of different sized buckets and spades. You finally remembered, last time you'd seen the Heffleys you'd promised Greg you'd be on his team against Rodrick for a sandcastle building competition.

"Rodrick I love you, but you are so going down" you said, playfully poking him in the ribs before running off to the equipment with Greg.

"Hey no fair! You guys don't get a head start!" He called after the two of you.

The sandcastle competition was definitely pretty tense, you and Greg had opted for a "bigger = better" strategy, and had come up with a 3 storey castle.

Rodrick's, while much smaller, was more detail oriented. He'd decorated it with little stones, and even carved out little battlements.

When the time was up, the three of you went to get Susan and Frank to judge, but when you'd returned only one castle was left.  It would appear that Manny had decided that Rodrick's Castle was the perfect race course for one of his toy trucks, and in the few seconds you were all gone, he'd reduced it to rubble.

"Ha! We won!" Greg jeered.

You looked at Rodrick, who seemed genuinely disappointed.

"Aw baby," you stroked his arm, "I think your castle was Manny's favourite at least"

He smiled slightly at this, but still seemed slightly miffed that all his hard work was ruined.

Never mind, you knew exactly how to cheer him up

"How about we go check out those rock pools?" You asked.

Rodrick grinned excitedly, immediately forgetting about the sand castle, "oh yeah! I hope we see something cool!" He beamed, grabbing your hand and eagerly pulling you in the direction of the rocks.

You carefully climbed onto the glistening wet rocks, made just that bit more treacherous by the odd bit of seaweed and sharp barnacles. You held onto Rodrick tightly, fearing that his clumsy self would slip and accidentally keelhaul himself.

(A/n if you don't know what keelhaulling is, look it up at your own risk. It's pretty gnarly).

"What are those things?" Rodrick asked curiously, pointing towards tufts of purple sticking out from the sides of the rock pools.

"Sea anemones! Be really gentle and touch them, see what happens" you encouraged him.

Rodrick looked slightly nervous, but he trusted you. He dipped his finger into the shallow water and felt the tiny tentacles grip his finger. He giggled high pitch and very amused, before pulling his hand away and shaking it dry.

"It was like, sticky?" He said

You laughed at his reaction, he was adorable when he was confused.

"That was it trying to eat you! It thought your finger was a little fish!"

"Really?!"

"Mhm"

"That's so funny," he bent down to look at the anemone, "you're no match for me little bro" he said cockily.

You were unsure as to whether he was joking, or if he was genuinely proud of not being eaten by a gelatinous blob the size of a penny. Probably the latter, knowing Rodrick, but either way you find it endearing.

You spent quite a while trapesing around the rock pools, Rodrick seemingly fascinated by everything- particularly the little clusters of sea snails. He likened their pointy shells to his studded bracelet, affectionately giving them the title of "most metal animal he'd seen all day". His day was made, however, when you called him over to a tiny pool right at the edge of the rocks.

"Baby, come quick!"

He rushed over, abandoning the clump of seaweed he'd been popping like bubblewrap, and turned his attention towards what you'd been pointing at.

There, nestled inbetween a few tufts of seaweed, sat the tiniest little crab, it's body not much bigger than the tip of a pinky finger. As Rodrick kneeled down to get a closer look, his face was graced with a wide, goofy smile. He looked between you and the crab for a few seconds, before blurting out "it's a little baby!", his voice high and girlish.

You let out a chuckle at this, watching your boyfriend's eyes grow in amazement and glee at the sight of such a small crab. His attention was fixed to it for as long as it sat there, until the crab must have decided that staring back at the squealing Rodrick had become tedious, and scuttled away under some pebbles.

Rodrick finally stood once again, and reached out to hold your hands.

"That was so cool," he said, his eyes twinkling and his smile somehow even more loveable than ever.

"You're so cute," you replied, unable to contain your adoration any longer. You placed your arms over his shoulders, while instinctively, Rodrick held your waist.

You leaned in and planted a delicate kiss on his lips. Sometimes it was hard to remember he was a hardcore punk guy with a big beat up van, and an affinity for moshing. At times like this, all you saw was an innocent, precious sweetheart. You just wanted to hold his face and pepper it with gentle kisses, while showering him with compliments like "my handsome boy," and "you're the cutest thing in the whole world". You probably would later, but not right now. He'd never live it down if his family saw him being such a big softie.

You allowed yourself to get lost in his big brown eyes for a moment longer, before you heard Frank calling the two of you to come and get some food.

I love you, you thought to yourself as Rodrick carefully guided you down the rocks. As if he could read your mind, he threw an arm round your shoulder and whispered in your ear

"I love you, y/n"

A/n requests are open! I write hcs and short fics for a couple characters, check my pinned post for details! :^)

(Pls request something I need ideas lol)

[embodyingchaos]

hello, divine person, sorry if I bothered you a lot, but I'm dying for rodrick and you/n pregnant, could you make a headcanon of rodrick before and after the pregnancy and all this please

❥ hiii! of course, i can! im so sorry this is late!

rodrick heffley before & after pregnancy headcanons warnings: pregnancy stuff, gn but afab reader

OKOK SO, rodrick before the pregnancy would include a lot, and i mean A LOT of panicking

he’d be like “oh my god, a baby? what are those? wait no… HOW DO YOU TAKE CARE OF THOSE THINGS?!?!?!?” and it would take him some time but he will eventually be used to it

he’d constantly ask you if you need anything or if you need him to do anything for you, you need the tv remote? he’ll grab it for you! you want chips? he’ll grab it for you! you want something that requires him to drive halfway across town? he’ll grab it for you!

he reads as much as he can about how to handle pregnancies and he even takes up a few actual jobs just to support you even if your parents were okay with your pregnancy and were paying for the hospital bills and stuff

rodrick would also never allow you to do things on your own, and its sweet! but it gets really annoying really fast

after the pregnancy, rodrick is definitely not getting enough sleep

every single time your baby would cry, he’d take care of it, i mean it is the least he could do after you literally pushed your child out of your vagina, which he wouldn’t have known was gonna happen if he hadn’t read up on those birthing guides(he thought babies were delivered by storks)

he would love you guys’ kid to little bits and pieces, getting the worst baby fever ever and would just want to constantly be with the little baby

rodrick would also already have planned where he’d take you guys’ kid to, LIKE THE WATER PARK AND THE ZOO AND CHUCK E CHEESE AND ALL THAT ADORABLE FAMILY ASS BULLCRAP AND ITS JUST SO HEART WARMING AND ADORABLE

you couldn’t ask for a better father for your child

[idonotwanttogrowupbitch]

Rodrick dating his opposite (i'm obsessed with this man, this isn't sane anymore)

Under the same context of the best friends to lovers post, you met because a teacher brought you together to do a project and then Rodrick hated you with his soul, you were too tidy, too responsible and too strict and he hated that, so he kindly decided to go on the road to bother you and make your life miserable for the rest of elementary school.

In high school when you were about 13 he played a joke on you that got a little (too) out of hand, he decided it was a good idea to start a rumor that you had touched that stinky cheese that was in the corner of the basketball court (yes he threw it and passed it around questionable places to make it even more disgusting) and then everyone started to reject you and it got to you, you knew Rodrick had done it so you reported him to your parents, you went to the principal and there the principal told you that from now on you had to get along (she had seen you since you were 5 fighting and she was fed up) and actually it worked.

At the beginning the interaction was a bit forced but you discovered that in spite of being opposite personalities and styles you had things in common and with time you became good friends, even inseparable, the director was very proud and susan was more than happy.

You learned to overcome your personalities, actually you both liked a lot of things that coincided, amusement parks, video games and all that, you really stayed together a lot but after a while you forced Rodrick to do his homework and even though he made a bad face he had made a deal with you.

He started to like you, a lot, when he spent so much time with you he realized that you were great and that he wanted you to be his girlfriend in the future, he actually said with a smile "I'll marry her when I grow up" every time you did him a favor or made him feel good, and even though you saw it as a game Rodrick started to like you without you realizing it.

Once you kissed (an awkward, short and uncomfortable kiss) just to taste the world of grown-ups and in the end you both ended up giving each other a good blow, first legendary kiss. "have you ever kissed anyone?" "no Rodrick, that's disgusting" "haha dummie.. …. do you want to try?" "yuck……okey"

As you got older you liked each other more and more, and then one day you told Rodrick how you felt about it and after a long silence he rushed up to you and kissed you (awkwardly of course, but romantic in Rodrick's way).

Greg loves you, this kid got attached to you like gum as soon as you became friends with his brother, always trying to get you to play video games with him, it's not like he likes you or anything but he really sees you as just another friend.

Rodrick is surprisingly corny, but only when you're in private. He loves cuddling with you he really loves it, once he hugs you you know you won't come out of there for at least 2 hours, he gives you kisses and cuddles up to you and puts his head in the crook of your neck, it's really cute when he gets all soft and whispers really nice things (I live for this Rodrick headcanon I created myself) he has written songs for you, or tried to, and plans one day to perform them with the band for you

i know i promise the best friends to lovers pt 2 but this come to my mind and i HAVE to write it down

[dreamingamongthestars]

If DR Asriel isn't anything like this idk what I'd do with myself bro

like this is a NEED

LIKE THE EVIDENCE IS RIGHT HERE

[theoglochnes]

Diary of a wimpy kid: Greg Goes Good! Decided to finally put some effort into something without quitting halfway through, but yeah this is a comic based on an alternate universe of the doawk book series where Greg gets a concussion and his personality switches. This is heavily inspired by that one Big Nate book where Nate gets hypnotized and turns into the good version of himself.

If you want quicker updates I suggest heading over to r/LodedDiper on reddit and finding me there!