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#disabled men
humormehorny · 2 months
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Men as a group may not be oppressed, but I really don’t know how to talk about men and any other marginalization without talking about how being a man affects those experiences.
men of color don’t experience racism tm
Trans men don’t experience transphobia tm
Disabled men don’t experience ableism tm
Neurodivergent men don’t experience ableism tm
Gay men don’t experience homophobia tm
They experience a unique version of these things that is informed by their manhood/masculinity. Men do not experience a general oppression that is informed by just their other marginalizations. It’s also informed by their gender. Men are not “the default gender” and their experiences are not “the default oppression” removed from gender.
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cripple-punk-dad · 2 years
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Apparently this needs repeating since the terfs found me again:
Hating men doesn't make you quirky or a feminist.
Feminism is about equality among all genders. Like that's the whole point.
Men with intersectional identities suffer under the patriarchy. Systemically. Because they are men. Disabled men, MOC, queer men. Fuck off with that "kill all men" bullshit.
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inkskinned · 6 months
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love when men cry about body hair bc "it's hygiene" and yet 15% of cis men leave the bathroom without washing their hands at all and an additional 35% only just wet their hands without using soap. that is nearly half of all men. that means statistically you have probably shaken hands with or been in direct contact with one of these people.
love when men say that women "only want money" when it turns out that even in equal-earning homes, women are actually adding caregiver burdens and housework from previous years, whereas men have been expanding leisure time and hobbies. in equal-earning households, men spend an average of 3.5 hours extra in leisure time per week, which is 182 hours per year - a little over a week of paid vacation time that the other partner does not receive. kinda sounds like he wants her money.
love that men have decided women are frail and weak and annoying when we scream in surprise but it turns out it's actually women who are more reliable in an emergency because men need to be convinced to actually take action and respond to the threat. like, actually, for-real: men experience such a strong sense of pride about their pre-supposed abilities that it gets them and their families killed. they are so used to dismissing women that it literally kills them.
love it. told my father this and he said there's lies, damned lies, and statistics. a year ago i tried to get him to evacuate the house during a flash flood. he ignored me and got injured. he has told me, laughing, that he never washes his hands. he has said in the last week that women are just happier when we're cooking or cleaning.
maybe i'm overly nostalgic. but it didn't used to feel so fucking bleak. it used to feel like at least a little shameful to consider women to be sheep. it just feels like the earth is round and we are still having conversations about it being flat - except these conversations are about the most obvious forms of patriarchy. like, we know about this stuff. we've known since well before the 50's.
recently andrew tate tried to justify cheating on his partner as being the "male prerogative." i don't know what the prerogative for the rest of us would be. just sitting at home, watching the slow erosion of our humanity.
#writeblr#warm up#ps edited so it is more clear where “half” of men is coming from:#15% literally don't even touch water#an ADDITIONAL 35% ''wash'' by just running their hands under water WITHOUT SOAP#15+35 =50%#like that is not washing ur hands. go back and use soap#btw the numbers for women are 4% never washing and 15% ''just water''#which is still gross but like. sooo much better yikes#ps i know we're all gay on this site but watching ppl ''correct'' my math on this has been wild#i have a learning disability im genuinely bad at math so i check EVERY time someone corrects me#but no they're just confidently wrong.....#182 hours is a week babes. 182/24 (number of hours in a day) is ~7.6#that's where i got that number from. also from rent we know there's 168 hours in a week.#ALSO btw if u read this and ur response is ''men are also struggling rn tho'' like babe you missed the point of it tho#this doesn't even make fun of men it's legit just pointing out that bigotry against women isn't founded#in anything men actually CARE about . like they don't actually CARE about ''being clean'' when they make fun of armpit hair#or they would be WASHING THEIR HANDS.#men pretend to be rollin' in cash and Apex Predators and instead they are trained to be lazy and unwilling to act in emergencies#i have never and will never make fun of men for asking for more support on important topics like DV and mental health.#this is so clearly not about men; it's about how common just being plainly misogynistic has become.#like they don't try to hide it anymore.
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crippled-peeper · 11 months
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disabled trans men don’t owe you physical fitness. disabled trans men don’t owe you stereotypical masculinity. disabled trans men don’t owe anyone protection or physical favors or displays of strength
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genderqueerdykes · 4 days
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disabled trans person need help paying for food, necessities + shipping supplies for shop after being homeless for 6 months
hello, my name is equinox, i am severely disabled autistic trans person dealing with schizophrenia, PTSD, arthritis, hypermobile ehlers-danlos syndrome, degenerative disc disease and gastroparesis. i am a wheelchair and cane user. i am recovering and stabilizing after being homeless for 6 months; i just spent 2 full months living in a hotel paying $38/night. i have relocated into my apartment that i was waiting 6 months for due to the subsidized housing program taking forever to calculate my earned income
i just paid $307 for my deposit + prorated rent in order to move in, as well as a $20 electric bill and a $35 bill to get internet set up, which is required for my jewelry business. i also had i also currently need a lot of things in order to make my house livable including a bed and food, and being able to get to the pharmacy for my medications. right now i have no food in my home due to having to spend money on uber XLs to and from my motel and storage unit in order to get the few possessions i have like blankets and personal belongings. i lost a lot of my kitchen supplies when transitioning between staying with friends for a while
i have almost no money on me right now. i will be re-stocking my shop with new items later today, but for now I need help being able to afford my living expenses as well as being able to afford to ship my products out to my customers. thank you to everyone who has helped thus far you have kept me safe for 6 months. you can help me here:
cash app: $glitterGraphix pay pal: glittergraphicnightmare@ gmail .com chime: $Equinoxian venmo: $Equinoxian
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prussianbluevelvet · 4 months
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Still seeing feminists in 2023 claiming that ‘emasculation isn’t real’ and it’s still baffling me.
How can you look at the lived realities of Asian and Jewish men and think “yeah these men totally aren’t emasculated and viewed as lesser males or less masculine than white men and it’s totally not dehumanising or racist or anything 😌” like. Racism against MOC doesn’t always look like portraying them as aggressive or dangerous, it can also look like viewing certain types of minority men as ‘failed’ men and ‘lacking real manhood’ as a dehumanising tactic. Myths about Jewish men previously portrayed them as having periods and being ‘basically women’. Asian men are fetishised and stripped of their manhood frequently by K-pop stans and people online who don’t realise that masculinity and gender roles look slightly different in non-western cultures.
Also… trans men. Who are FORCEFULLY emasculated and feminised against their will, by genocidal bigoted conservatives, and sometimes even somewhat by other queer people telling them to ‘tone down’ their non-toxic masculinity to avoid making others uncomfortable, making themselves dysphoric and detached from their gender identities to remain palatable.
What about disabled men? Are they not also viewed as failing to achieve proper manhood? Are they not also emasculated and viewed as ‘un-male’ or ‘less male’?
Minority men absolutely can and do experience emasculation. And it’s not ‘toxic’ or misogynistic to bring it up. Feminists who care about POC in particular should not be pretending otherwise.
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objection-u-a-bitch · 8 months
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You need to unlearn your misandry before you can be a proper ally and advocate for marginalised people. Because some of you like to deny it, but your distrust and hatred of men intersects with every marginalisation out there, while you're out here pretending that men can't be oppressed.
You don't trust a black man, you hold your purse a little tighter when one walks by, you cross the street to avoid him? Congratulations, you just perpetuated racism.
You don't trust a Jewish man, you won't let him express his Jewishness around you, you regard his kippah with fear? Congratulations, you just perpetuated antisemitism.
You don't trust a disabled man, you mock him for his awkwardness and hate him for trying to talk to you? Congratulations, you just perpetuated ableism.
You don't trust a trans man, you refuse to listen when he shares his experiences with misogyny or claim he betrayed women by transitioning? Congratulations, you just perpetuated transphobia.
You don't trust a fat man, you insult his appearance and mock him for trying to find a girlfriend? Congratulations, you just perpetuated fatphobia.
I could go on but I think my point is clear. You cannot separate your hatred of men from your oppression of marginilised groups, and to be a proper ally to any group you HAVE to unlearn it. I don't care if the patriarchy traumatised you. It has traumatised all of the men you hate too. So be better.
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hazel2468 · 7 months
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Something that I need people to understand, especially on this hellsite. Is that oppression does not depend on who you actually are.
It depends on how the world sees you.
If the world sees you as X identity. They will treat you as X identity, whether you are or not. If the world sees that you are not X identity, but they can use the oppression of X identity as a cudgel to make you act the way they want you to? They will use it.
Oppression is NOT dependent on who you actually are. It depends on how the world sees you. It depends on how people see you and what they decide to put on you because of that.
Oh. And when someone experiences a form of oppression that is NOT based in the reality of who they are? It's still that kind of oppression. It's not "misdirected"- it is still that kind of oppression being leveraged to maintain the current social climate.
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cripple-punk-dad · 2 years
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Kiss all men (consensually)
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deeperlydreaming · 8 months
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Sometimes I think about how I went to my endo for testosterone to begin transitioning, and during the appointment I described my chronic illness symptoms. And she perked up, excited and said "oh, I'm so excited for you, you're going to feel 10000% better once you start T."
It was horrifying. I've had these symptoms for decades.
Testosterone could have helped me, even when I thought I was a cis woman, even at a low dose, but it wasn't given as an option because it's limited to "gender affirming care."
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jasontoddssuper · 4 months
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"I love men who're freaks🥰😳😍"You guys can't even handle dudes with physical disabilities
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trans-androgyne · 5 months
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I love men idc. The world built me not to; I’m not a man, I am a lesbian, I’ve been through hell at the hands of some of the worst men out there, and I am still put in a lot of scary situations around them. But men as a whole deserve to be loved and celebrated for who they are, and we need to recognize the kinds of pressures that are on men to constantly perform, to constantly do, to constantly prove themselves, and the kind of fucked up shit that can do to a person. I feel like trans people in general have a special perspective on this matter and I hope we can use it to extend our love to all kinds of men, cis, trans, and anything else.
It doesn’t help that when people hear “man,” too many instantly think “cishet, white, abled man,” which is exactly what the patriarchy & white supremacy want you to think (though these men also deserve love and compassion and care). Don’t put your suffering under systems of power on individual men. And remember, you never have to prove yourself as a man to be one.
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inkskinned · 2 months
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you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.
(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)
but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.
(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)
there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.
(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)
you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.
(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)
you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.
in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.
but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.
they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.
it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.
#spilled ink#warm up#can you tell what i'm mad about today specifically#i will say that there are a LOT of things that go into this. like a lot. this is ungendered and unspecific for a reason#it isn't just sexism. it's also racism. and ableism. and honestly classism.#and before a healthcare professional reads this as a personal attack: i understand ur burnt out#we are ALSO burnt out. your situation is also dire. this is not an attack on you.#this is a commentary on the incredible amounts of bigotry that lie at the heart of capitalism#where people have to pay money out of pocket to be told to fuck off.#your job is important. so is our humanity. and if you cannot accept that people are fucking mad as hell#at the industry - you are probably not listening .#anyway at some point im gonna write a piece about sexism specifically in medical shit#but i don't want terfs clowning in it bc they can't understand nuance#> it is true that ppl w/a uterus are more likely to experience medical malpractice & dismissal globally#> it is also true that trans people experience an equally fucked up and bad time in the medical field#> great news! the medical industrial complex is an equal opportunity life ruiner :)#(if you find it necessary to go into a debate about biology while discussing medical malpractice#i want to warn you that you're misunderstanding the issue. because guess what.#cis MEN might experience this. particularly black men. particularly disabled men.#so YES having a uterus can lead to more trouble for you. but this happens a LOT.#instead of fighting those ALSO experiencing your pain.... try working WITH them.#which btw. is like. actual feminism.)
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valleykey · 9 months
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If we completely ignore the context of this it's like he's having his period
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transmascissues · 6 months
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i’m going to be starting a job soon where it looks like almost all of my coworkers/bosses are going to be cis women and i am…terrified. especially since this is the job i’m going to have to get time off from for top surgery.
if there’s one thing i’ve learned over the almost ten years of my transition, it’s that a situation where i’m the only guy there is one where my gender is guaranteed to not be respected. it really feels like far too many cis women realize they’re alone with a trans man and just see it as an opportunity to act out some sort of power fantasy where they get to stick it to the big bad evil men by taking out their anger on the first man they see without the power to fight back. that or they decide you’re “just one of the girls” and will not hear otherwise, but honestly, given where i’m at in my physical transition, i have a feeling the former is more likely.
there was a time when i felt safer around cis women than around cis men, but now it’s just a different kind of threat.
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genderqueerdykes · 8 days
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homeless disabled trans person needs help paying for hotel, storage unit & phone while government assistance housing program keeps delaying their move in date
March 21st, 3/21/2024: hello, I'm equinox or Johnny, I'm a severely multiply disabled trans person living in a hotel right now due to not being able to afford apartments on the housing market right now. i have a guaranteed apartment through a government assistance program, but their compliance team keeps delaying my move in date because they cannot figure out how to calculate my earned income because i am self employed. they have been running me in circles asking for the exact same information for six months and have been becoming increasingly more condescending and rude as I've pointed out that they're asking for information i physically cannot provide, like "bank statements" for GoFundMe, a fundraiser website that considers all money earned personal gifts, and tumblr bank statements.
i haven't been able to get my hormones in weeks.
i was promised to move into my apartment on the 7th, then the 11th of this month, and it was requested of me to put the electricity bill in my name so I could get moved in as soon as possible. I did this and now i have a $20 electric bill in my name because they've delayed for so long. my unit has been sitting empty for 6 months and now I'm expected to pay for the electricity that is running in a 1 bedroom apartment I'm not living in.
i have been homeless for 6 months straight. i have been living in my hotel for 2 months. my hotel has been without WiFi for a month which forced me to get a Tracfone with a data plan so I can do my job and communicate with this apartment complex via email. i unfortunately need to buy more data because this has taken so long. most of my possessions including large portions of my stock and shipping supplies are in my storage unit, of which the $78 bill is due in 3 days.
the hotel I'm staying at is normally $40/night but the prices are skyrocketing this weekend because this is a very cheap hotel due to its low rates. i can't afford any of these nights independently of each other, let alone altogether, and it's Thursday and i haven't heard a single word about my move in date.
i have been depressed and crying for days, i cracked a tooth from clenching my teeth and i haven't been sleeping due to stress and nightmares. anything helps. thank you for taking the time to read and support and share. everyone has kept me housed for 2 months so far. i owe you all so much
cash app: $glitterGraphix
venmo: @ Equinoxian
chime: @ Equinoxian
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