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csbenthusiast · 2 months

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May your heart never stop beating for me - Choi Yeonjun X f!reader

a/n: *ahem* hi😭 it’s been a long looong while since I last wrote something and posted in here(my apologies), but ummmm this is a comeback ? sort of? idk, but what I know is that this was sitting on my docs app FOR SO SO LONG LIKE SINCE FEBRUARY and it was supposed to be out on Halloween and then on Christmas but I got sick😬 anyways consider this a miracle and a late gift 😀 (I’m also planning a Soob fic that was supposed to be out on his birthday but shhhhhlets not talk about it for now).

a/n²: y’all I lied😨 I’m late once again, but what matters is that it’s finally here!! Literally a year later 😀 and ummm I tried to mix two ways of writing this, so I hope it was not confusing!

Genre: angst? it’s bittersweet.

CW: toxic relationship (nothing to worry about, YJ and mc just go back and forth), language, Yeonjun has a bad behavior(I’m not sorry, I was feeling very angsty), implied suggestive touches? they both need each other in a not so healthy way. Lemme know if I missed something!

WC: 2.2k

disclaimer: this only fiction and does not represent this idol in any way.

Pls enjoy and give me feedbacks:DDD they make me very happy (English is not my first language, excuse any mistakes 😙)

Songs I listened while writing this: here

The weather outside was definitely a mood killer. As the days passed by, October just got colder and colder. And it’s not like the chilly weather wasn’t nice, in fact, it was actually quite pleasant.

The season was nice, sure. But spending the days alone was not on your ‘to do’ list, to be honest.

Yeonjun left without even explaining himself once again. Everyday life seemed meaningless and the urge to check up on him was growing more and more.

It was worthless, though. Why bother yourself when he has never put you on the top of his priority list? Was it too much to ask?

Despite that, here you were, almost 10pm on a Tuesday trying to cheer up your mood with a random movie playing on the TV.

It was a terrible film, though. The best option was probably going to sleep, but you knew better; going to bed meant reminiscing everything until the first ray of sunshine was peeking through the curtains.

In the end, you tried to go through that mess.

And, somehow, that thing was able to get your attention to the point where you ended up startled by the sound of the doorbell.

You tried to ignore it at first, too scared to check who it was, but it rang again. Was it a murder? No, no murder would ring the doorbell before making a victim.

In defeat, and dragging your feet to where the door was, you took a look through the peephole and, right now, the person outside was probably worse than a murder.

Yeonjun couldn’t be on the other side in the middle of the night, right? It was like he read your mind.

You twisted the keys in a hurried move, though. Being curious sometimes was a curse.

“Hey.” It’s the only thing he bothered to say, looking at his feet like he was ashamed. As if.

“What are you doing here?” You hissed, not really sure of how you were supposed to feel. It’s kind of bittersweet.

He was still looking at the ground, but you took notice of how Yeonjun was shivering. Was it due to the cold and the lack of clothes? You’re not sure.

“I…” a sigh escaped his chapped “I don’t know, all the roads lead me here at the end of the day, I suppose.” It was an attempt to cheer up the mood, but by the look on your face he quickly replaced his smile with a frown.

Two pairs of eyes bored into each other, and it was clear that you were anything but pleased to see him standing by your doorstep. But, again, being good could be a curse, perhaps.

It was cold outside, and Yeonjun was shivering. Maybe you should invite him inside. Unfortunately, you did.

Huening Kai will have to deal with this later, I guess.

"Come on, you're clearly cold." You stepped aside, making room for him. "I can make some tea if you'd like. What do you say?"

"That's what I like about you, Y/N." Yeonjun winked "You're always looking out for me." and made himself comfortable on her couch.

"Do you deserve it, though?" the girl mumbled, occupying herself in the kitchen.

Meanwhile, the older boy was looking around the room and hallway. A few things changed; the picture you two took back in July was no longer hanging on the wall and a few decorations were out of place. Odd.

"Hey, Y/N?" he called, receiving back a hum. "Where's our photo? You know, the one you're kissing my cheek."

The nerve. Where does he think it went?

"What do you mean 'Where's our photo'?" She scoffed, dropping a few things while doing so. "I put it in a box, of course" and mumbled loud enough for Yeonjun to hear.

The boy frowned as if she said the most horrible thing in the world. How could she put it in a box? Does that mean their relationship meant nothing to her?

"I can see the gears turning inside your head." Y/N said from behind, which scared him a little. Did you have a sixth sense or something? "Don't think too much about it… or do, it's up to you since I don't have a say in any of our conversations anyways."

Now, that definitely bruised his ego. Why were you being so passive aggressive all of sudden?

"What's wrong?" He asked, sitting by the couch once again.

Is he playing dumb? Or is he just trying to get under my skin?

Y/N bitterly chuckled. You surely could've ignored him when he knocked on your fucking door a few minutes ago, but you didn't and now you had to deal with his stupid behavior.

No, wait. Why were you complaining, though? You were the one who agreed to play his little games, right? Little games? Is that what this is?

"Hey, Y/N, look at me, will you?" Ah, it took him long enough. He used that sweet tone; he always did. Maybe that's his curse, being awfully sweet yet such a jerk sometimes. "What's wrong? Now I'm the one who's able to see the gears in your head." He chuckled and grabbed her hands, gesturing for Y/N to sit beside him.

His touch sent shivers down her spine, but it’s not like she would admit it. And Yeonjun must’ve noticed that, because he took this opportunity to bring Y/N closer to his body with a hug.

That touch was supposed to be an act of comfort, but it only made her feel more anxious than when she saw his face earlier that night. However, it was impossible to ignore his scent; y/n’s senses were drowning with every touch and breath lingering on her skin. Yeonjun was sneaky, he moved his hand off her arms and stroked her back, and, maybe, just maybe, y/n’s heart started to beat a little bit faster and louder.

Perhaps that’s your curse. Yeonjun always found a way to drive you insane, and you always tried to push his buttons. But by the end of the day, you two would always get back together. Saying that it would be the last time you’d hurt each other was pointless, because it was not the truth.

Despite everything, y/n wanted to be mad, sad and let everything out. But she couldn’t, her mind was a complete mess with every brush of his fingers on her skin.

“Hey, you seem off.” Yeonjun brought her face closer to his by holding her chin.

“Am I now?” Y/N flinched at his touch, face burning with the proximity. Your body betraying your emotions made him smirk.

Yeonjun’s breath was against her neck, with lips slightly brushing over her ear.

“Yes, you are.” He whispered. “Kitten, talk to me. Why are your walls suddenly up, hm?” And planted a kiss by her pulse point.

This situation was uncomfortable, to say the least. But it’s not like you wanted him to stop.

Really? He should stop. You had to stop it.

“I hate you…” y/n’s breath hitched. She pushed him away, but that was not enough. He frowned and tried to get closer to you at all costs. “I hate you for lying to me. And…and for running away when you sensed something was wrong. You always do that and then come back here to say it’s the last time, but let’s be honest, we both know it’s not the last time and…”

Yeonjun kept quiet the whole time. He knew you were right, it was a very good point, but he wouldn’t admit it. As always, he tried to stand up for himself.

“Come on, Y/N, that’s not true. We both know that.” his thumb grazed the line of her upper lip and her whole body tingled at the touch.

You were better than that, of course. Your hands wrapping around his wrists to push him away were enough of a sign to startle him.

“You’re making me look like some fucking crazy ex-boyfriend.” His words were sharp; sharp enough to make Y/N chuckle and cry at the same time.

Maybe that's what he is. Ex-boyfriend. The words matched his actions, but why hearing or even saying it out loud left a bitter taste in your mouth?

“Maybe that’s what you are.” hurt was evident in her voice. “You run away, fuck some other girl and then come back to me expecting everything will be alright? I’m tired, Yeonjun. And I’d appreciate it if you could just…leave me alone.”

He went silent. The room grew silent once again, and the only sound that dared break the silence was the soft thuds of his heart. His breath hitched, but he put on an act with a scoff, trying his best to look unfazed.

What else was he expecting? She was right, he messed up one too many times. Even when they did reconcile, it never lasted long.

After a few minutes of thinking, and an endless amount of silence, he looked at her with a sly smile curling his lips.

“Kitten, has anyone made you feel as good as I do? I don’t think so…” his lips widened even more with every second.

And, maybe, just maybe, he was right, and thinking about it left a bitter taste on your mouth. No one has ever made you feel like he did; does. Did it really matter if he shattered your heart? By the end of the day he would be just Yeonjun, the loving, caring and stupid boy you met through your friends.

Yeonjun could read you like a book, but you never really tried to hide your feelings or reactions either. Just the subtle brush of his fingertips on your arm was enough to get him under your skin again.

It’s all too overwhelming.

“You like this, don’t you?” He whispered. “It’s a cat and mouse game. Excited much?” Yeonjun added.

Oh, yes. This was nothing but a game.

Right before his eyes y/n was clearly aching. But you didn’t have anywhere to hide, did you? You opened the door and let him in.

It’s just you and me now, she thought.

“Who wins in the end?” Y/n looked at him with a bored expression, but in reality everything about her was fragile now.

Despite that, Yeonjun kept a smug look on his face, bringing her close to him. It was obvious what he was thinking.

“I’m not quite sure. Wanna find out?” He licked his lips and kissed her cheek.

His breath was hot on your collar, making you loudly swallow. He moved his mouth from your face to your ear, then jawline and lastly the neck, making you whole body shiver with the contact, a human contact you missed for weeks.

“Why do you treat me like this?” She mumbled, too dizzy with his touches.

“Now, that’s not what I asked, love. Do you want to find out how this game ends?”

A tear dared to almost run down your face. You wouldn’t let Yeonjun do that to you, though.

“M-mouse…” Y/N whispered. “Mouse wins.”

Yeonjun seemed amused by your response, which made his grin widen; you couldn’t properly speak without wanting to break right in front of him.

He pulled away from you, going back on his feet.

Is he going away again? You thought right before he offered his hands for you to take. And so you did, just like you did a few months ago.

Surprisingly, the palm of his hands were really warm and welcoming. Who would’ve thought, right?

“You’re so pretty, princess…” Yeonjun smoothed your hair and dragged his thumb across your lips.

Pretty? It’s more like ‘weak’.

He was asking for something, that was a fact even if unspoken. You couldn’t blame him, could you? He was just this good at turning the tables, so good to the point he would make you feel weak and break for him.

“You’re not supposed to be here…” That was everything y/n was able to reply. She was confused, frustrated. Why was he doing all of this? To torture you?

But it felt good, though; having him there in the middle of the living room under the dim lights of the apartment. You didn’t want to be alone, it was not a good option.

However, it was impossible to ignore the tension growing in the air.

Before she could think some more, Yeonjun stumbled with her into the kitchen, being quick to press a soft kiss on her lips and placing her on top of the counter.

It was a short touch of lips, but enough to make y/n sparkle inside and also shake with anxiety. He did know how to be convincing.

“This is the last time I tell you’ve got it wrong…the last time I’ll run away.” He mumbled, chin resting on her shoulder while she caressed his covered back.

“Only if you promise me your heart won’t ever stop beating for me.”

He nodded, a silent agreement.

Was it really?

“I promise.” Yeonjun smirked, holding y/n on his arms and dragging her down the hallway straight to her room.

Heh happy Valentine’s Day y’all

#txt x reader #choi yeonjun x reader #choi yeonjun #yeonjun x reader #tomorrow x together x reader #txt imagines #txt x y/n #txt scenarios #yeonjun imagines

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summercourtship · 9 months

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stay to burn (only to drown instead): chapter one: water to tread [part I]

masterpost | ao3 link

jonathan crane x reader; bruce wayne x reader; edward nashton x reader | warnings: canon typical violence, sexual themes | word count: 4218 words

DISCLAIMER: these chapters are not meant to be read alone. not every chapter has content for one of the three pairings listed. this is an ongoing fanfiction that I am cross-posting here on tumblr, not a series of one-shots.

The rain in Gotham was poison on your skin, more acid than water as it hit the city’s streets. It wasn’t doing anything to wash away the grime. Instead, it made it bubble to the surface like a toxic stew of dirt and blood. But you’d lived here for long enough that you were used to it and paid it no mind as you quickly walked home, trying to ignore your water logged shoes and pitifully wet socks. It was much later than you liked being out but your sleazy manager still scheduled you for late shifts despite you repeatedly telling him why you aren't comfortable walking home in the dark.

“Get some pepper spray and don’t flatter yourself.” He’d rolled his eyes when you’d tried explaining, raising his eyebrow as he gestured to your body. You didn’t bother telling him you already had a canister of pepper gel (it’s better than pepper spray) in your purse. And your backpack. And the inside pocket of your usual coat.

You also didn’t bother bringing up Gotham’s stupidly high crime rate and the statistics of violence in the city, knowing it wouldn’t do you any good. You didn’t want to push too hard and end up out in the rain, jobless and soon to be homeless when you wouldn’t be able to afford your rent. And then you’d lose your ability to continue your education, and everything would just keep spiraling downward along the same trajectory until you’re a drophead and trying to bum dollars off the clients outside the Iceberg Lounge.

All of that to say that you had to watch what you said around your boss because you needed your job.

Half of the time, you were able to find someone to cover the night shifts over at the 24/7 convenience store but every now and then they couldn’t (or wouldn’t). And sometimes you decided to just grin and bear it for the money. The shop was understaffed anyway and they made you feel like shit for not being able to work every waking second, even though you explained time and time again why you didn’t want to walk home after eight P.M.

But they thought it would be “special treatment” to only give you the shifts you wanted to work. Or they told you that with the extra money you made you could just order an Uber. But the prospect of getting into a random car was more nerve wracking than the idea of walking home alone at night. So you picked the lesser of two evils and walked.

So, that’s where you were at.

It was better, anyway, to brave the walk home than to be on a bus or in a cab by yourself. At least you could run if something bad happened to you out here. It felt like every other day now there was a bus or train jacking for some asinine reason and you really didn’t want to have to deal with that.

As you walked down the street, you subconsciously adjusted the hood of your rain jacket, but whether you were trying to hide your identity or shield yourself from the rain, it was futile.

Your face was dripping wet, and you were being watched.

You didn’t notice exactly when watching became following (always be aware of your surroundings, but there’s too much to be aware of in Gotham city that you’re bound to miss something), but soon enough you were more than aware of it. A hot itching feeling at the base of your neck started, sending a wave of heat and anxiety over you as you glanced in a passing window to confirm what your mind had been whispering at you.

Three men were following you.

One short and stocky, one tall and gangly. The third, middle one, being completely unremarkable- which is why he scared you the most of the three. It was always those ones who were the most dangerous.

When you stopped at an intersection for the crossing signal to turn in your favor, you glanced around you. Cars sped by, their tires disturbing the permanent puddles on the road. If you were attacked now, would anyone stop? Or would they chalk you up to another number in Gotham’s ever increasing violent crime statistic?

The men had stopped after you halfway down the block, keeping their distance behind you. You allowed yourself to, for a moment, entertain the notion that you were just being sensitive and jumpy. That nothing would happen and you'd get back to your wonderfully warm and horribly cramped apartment with a sigh of relief when you realize that your paranoia had gotten the best of you again.

But in this city, paranoia is akin to safety.

You spared another glance behind you, pretending like you were just checking out the closed lingerie store you had stopped next to while you were waiting for the crossing signal to change. They were leaning against the brick of the next shop down and goosebumps ran down your arms when you saw them looking your way. Really, they were leering and the way they did was enough to set off every alarm bell in your head. Adrenaline burned over your skin as your brain went into a quiet frenzy, trying to figure out how to get out of the situation as safely as possible.

Realistically, you had three options:

Option one: run. (but you must also consider the possibility of falling, being hit by a car if you didn’t look carefully enough, or still being overpowered by the men.)

Option two: fight back. (the option most likely to end with you dead, if you’re being honest with yourself.)

Option three: ??? (there was no option three.)

Turning back to the crosswalk you jolt forward as the little LED man giving you permission to cross the street flashed at you. You quickly crossed, not even checking the street to ensure cars had actually stopped coming. Being hit by a car was the least of your worries (at least they could pay off your student loans).

Sneaking another glance behind you as you rushed onto the other sidewalk, barely sidestepping a large puddle, your heart sunk in your chest when you saw the men start following you again, their dark eyes trained on you like a predator stalking its prey.

Without a second thought, you started running, pressing your way past all the other people walking home. You didn’t even apologize when you jostled them too much and they didn’t seem to care. Really, they barely paid you any mind, adopting the typical attitude of Gothamites: it’s none of my business; I didn’t see anything; I don’t want any trouble.

Always content to stand back and watch, never concerned enough to do anything about it.

You could feel rather than hear your socks squelching in your shoes as you ran through puddle after puddle. You twisted your body, sliding your backpack around to your front. If you could just get your pepper-gel out of your bag, maybe you’d have a chance of escaping this relatively unscathed. Shoving your hand into the front pocket, you fumbled around inside, not caring when your hair ties and period products fell onto the sidewalk. They are replaceable.

Finally, your hand wraps around the familiar canister, your thumb immediately turning it so it was ready to deploy. You should have done this from the moment you left the convenience store but you’d been so ready to leave and so tired that you trusted your luck a little too much.

You’re close to your apartment by now but you won’t risk leading them to your home- your sanctuary. Instead, you make the hasty decision to duck into an alleyway between a diner and a bike shop- both closed for the night. Pressing your back against the dirty brick, you breathe slowly, fighting against your body’s instinct to pant in exhaustion.

You knew that the men were still following you, and that they definitely saw you go into the alley- there were not enough people on this street to hide your movements. All you could do was wait for the light spilling into the alley from the street to be blocked.

You didn’t have to wait a long time- within thirty seconds the slow, wet stomps of boots on the sidewalk drifted into the alley. You held your arm out, desperately trying to keep your grip from wavering.

The second you saw one of the men, you pressed on the trigger of the pepper-gel, but clearly luck wasn’t on your side as it jammed just long enough for the man to rush towards you and knock it out of your hand. It sputtered as it landed in a puddle, useless and dead. The tiny canister hadn’t given you much hope, but even now that was dashed.

The shortest of the men shoved you against the wall, ripping your bag away from where you’d been holding it like a shield against your chest. He threw it to the one who knocked your pepper-gel out of your hand, who immediately began searching through its contents.

The short one slammed you against the wall again, knocking the wind out of your chest, bringing his knee up into your stomach before you could catch it again. You crumpled in on yourself, pulling out every ounce of strength you had to keep your feet steady on the ground. You’re brought back into reality when the tallest man comes behind you and holds you still against him. You lift your impossibly heavy head to stare at the short one, daring him to do what his sleazy smile was implying.

But the man only rears his hand back and punches you across the face.

Pain blossomed from the moment his knuckles met your cheek, an involuntary cry escaping your mouth along with a glob of spit. The man holding you readjusts his grip on you, his arms hooked under your armpits. As soon as you’re able to bring air back into your lungs you renew your struggle against his grip, trying desperately to jab your elbow against the sensitive flesh of his stomach or into his side. Anywhere that might cause him to release his hold on you.

You knock your head back, trying to look up into his face to see if he was bothered yet or if he still had that same self-satisfied grin on his face. But your eyes slip right past his grimy complexion.

Instead, through the sheets of water falling from the sky, through the lights of the buildings, your eyes focused on the clouds. Or rather, what was being projected onto them. It didn’t appear every night but tonight it seemed that somewhere, someone in Gotham needed him.

You certainly did.

“What’s this?” A rough voice broke your focus, wrenching your attention away from the signal in the sky. The one who’d been pawing through your bag held up two thick bundles of money, tied together with rubber bands. You closed your eyes, heart sinking, head dropping against the tall one’s chest.

“Shit!” The tall one laughed at the sight, his chest hitting your back with his boisterousness. But you know it's really not that much cash, maybe $350, certainly not enough to warrant the beating you’d already received. Singles and fives stack up quickly.

You wonder if they’ll be disappointed when they count it out and see it’s not even enough for a month’s rent in this city.

“Now what were you doing to get this?” The stocky one swept his gaze up and down your body, fingers twitching like he wanted to touch you too. “And how much for one night?”

You knew what he was insinuating, but in reality your boss was just shit at paying you everything you were owed on time. Every month or so you’d finally ask him about it and he’d just reach into the register and give you cash. Did it feel illegal, or at least extremely shady? Yes. But you needed the job and you were just getting what you were already due from your work. He’d be in more trouble if he withheld anymore from you than he already did.

“Give it back.” You struggled to get the words out, water and blood pooling on your lips. You tried to wiggle your way out of your captor’s grip again but he didn't let go.

“I don’t think so, whore.” He drops you to the ground, your hip hitting the concrete with a wet thud, landing in a questionably dirty puddle. He swiftly kicked you in the stomach, forcing a wheeze out of your lungs. You curled in on yourself.

The man was rearing up to kick you again, and you wondered if he’s actually aiming for your stomach. In a flash, you can see him missing and instead kicking your face in. You were so certain that this would be what was about to happen that you close your eyes, bracing yourself for the worst pain you would ever feel.

But the kick never comes.

Instead, you hear a deep thud followed by the obvious rustling and scuffing of boots on pavement. Then, the dull sound of punches landing on clothed skin, hushed threats spoken in a low voice.

The men aren’t laughing anymore.

“Go.” It’s not a familiar voice, certainly not any of the three men who’d attacked you. But it couldn’t be who you’re hoping it was, right?

Your bag lands beside you and from the sound of it, it was pitifully empty as the men ran away, almost splashing through the rain in their hurry to leave.

You open your eyes, blinking in the warm light of the streetlamp. You keep your gaze focused on the bricks, watching a soiled band-aid float across the puddle you were currently laying in. Gross.

Two black combat boots stepped into the circle of light, raindrops rolling off the leather onto the pavement.

So it was who you thought it was.

“You’re a bit late,” you cough, grimacing as you attempt to lift yourself. The man says nothing, which is about as much as you expected. You’d read all about him, the masked vigilante running around, trying to save Gotham.

You finally managed to push yourself into a seated position, your clothes now so thoroughly soaked you didn’t mind sitting in the puddle while you attempted to gather your thoughts. You don’t think you could actually stand right now anyway.

“They took my money.” You sighed, more to yourself than to him. “That was like, 30 hours of work.”

How the hell are you going to feed yourself for the next two weeks?

“You shouldn’t be out walking at this hour.”

You finally look up at him, the Batman, narrowing your eyes. Out of all the things he could say, he chose that? You don’t allow yourself to be starstruck, astounded by his overwhelming presence in front of you, instead choosing to be indignant about what he said. How removed from reality it was. You can’t read his expression, what with most of it covered by that mask of his. Maybe he regrets what he said, but it’s just as likely that he sees nothing wrong with it at all.

“I’m going home. I work late.”

Once again, he didn’t say anything, simply watching as you pulled yourself onto your feet. Your footing was shaky but you didn’t feel like you would keel over, at least not immediately. You could make it the few blocks to get back to your apartment.

Then your knee gave out from under you and you’re about to fall right back over when he steadied you with one gloved hand on your upper arm.

Your heart jumps in your chest, any annoyance that you had felt dissipating at his touch.

“Let me help you home.”

His voice cut through the silence between you. Wouldn’t it be nice to be escorted home by the man who saved Gotham on a regular basis? But a moment later your ears pick up the faint sound of a siren in the background and you shake your head, waking up from the awed stupor his presence had put you in.

“I think you’re needed elsewhere.” Bending down to pick up your soaked and empty bag, you gave him a soft smile. “That probably wasn’t for me.” You gesture to the signal in the sky, still projected onto the clouds. You’d always wondered who kept it lit, who decided when the Batman was needed and when he could stay in. As far as you knew, the crime of Gotham never ended. He was always needed.

“Thank you for the offer, though.” You stopped, frowning when you realized that only seconds after you’d finished speaking he had disappeared once again into the shadows.

The rest of your walk home saw your thoughts preoccupied, almost getting hit by a black sedan you’re so distracted.

The Batman had saved you. You! Somebody whose body, if it ever became just a body with no life in it, would’ve barely made a line on the fifth page in the next day’s news.

You moved like a zombie, ambling and slow, through the streets, only waking up from your daze when you arrived at your building. Old bricks with moss clinging on them towered above you, the buzzing light above the main entrance flickering.

Your apartment itself was small, sandwiched in the middle of a hundred year old building that showed its age in the worst ways. The apartment had clearly been renovated at some point to give the main space a more open floor plan, but aside from that it was pretty much exactly as it had been when it was built. Uneven door frames, cracked window panes, creaky floors. But it was your home, your safe haven in this godforsaken city.

Thrusting open the door with a decidedly unladylike grunt (your key got stuck half of the time), you threw your keys on the counter and your bag onto the floor. To your right when you entered was your kitchen, which consisted of nothing more than a few counters in the corner of the main room, complete with a stove in the middle and a fridge on the end of the row. A few nondescript magnets held papers on the fridge- grocery lists, greeting cards, your schedule, a brochure from the Gotham Museum of Fine Art.

You immediately made a beeline for your kettle, filling it with water and perching it back on the stove. In the back of the cupboard is a dusty Bella Reál campaign mug that you should really throw away but can’t bring yourself to. You don’t pick it though, instead pulling out an old Christmas mug. Turning and rummaging through your pantry cabinet, you pull out a well-worn box of Sleepy Time Tea that had been your saving grace this past year.

“God, I wish I was you.” You murmured to the tiny bear on the packet before ripping it open and throwing it into the Christmas mug.

It’s almost November. Close enough. (And you broke your only Halloween mug last week.)

As you waited for the kettle to boil, you moved to the section of the room that you have designated as your living room and office space. Against one wall was a desk with your laptop still open on it, various textbooks, and random documents scattered on its worn surface. Directly next to it (at an uncomfortably close distance, sometimes) was your TV stand with the world’s smallest TV sitting off-center. More books were stacked next to it, ranging from history textbooks to self-indulgent paperback romances. Barely six feet from the TV stand was your couch, and just behind that, with barely any walking room, was a sliding glass door.

You glanced outside the windowed door to your balcony- which was a glorified fire escape, really- and almost shrieked when you noticed a large black silhouette. Heart racing, you yanked open the door, grunting as sticks slightly in the middle. Mustering the most of your strength, you heaved it the rest of the way open.

“How did you find me?” You asked immediately, not stepping away from the doorframe, from the comfort of your warm apartment.

“I have my ways.” The Batman was mostly hidden in the shadows, only the light reflecting off the tiny droplets that had collected on his suit differentiating him from the darkness.

“That didn’t answer my question.” Really, it only raised more. But he didn’t say anything else, so you just sighed and crossed your arms, wincing as the movement sent pain across your skin. “Why are you here?”

Typically, you wouldn’t be this standoffish, even with strange vigilantes that showed up unannounced on your doorstep. But you were tired and had had a rough night- you could say with confidence that it was one of the roughest you’d ever had. Honestly, you just wanted to curl under your duvet and take a nap for three days.

You raised your eyebrows at him, daring him to be the next to break the silence before you realized that he was holding something out to you. It took another second for you to recognize what it was.

Money.

It was crumpled and it was wet but it was money.

“Is… is that mine?” You reach out to take it from him, but he doesn’t let go of it yet. You’re tethered to him, connected by a wad of damp and dirty cash. But you can’t let go of it, you can’t risk him leaving and taking your hard-earned money with him (though you doubt he would do that, given that it's yours).

“What did you do for it?” His voice is quiet in the night air, barely audible over the rainfall and whoosh of cars five stories down below. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes again.

“Honest work, I swear.” You looked up into his eyes, almost glowing in their darkness, hidden being the mask and a layer of dark paint. You wondered, in the event you ever saw him again, if you would be able to tell what color they were. “A 24/7 corner store, the one on Swift and Broad. My boss just… sucks at paying me.” On time or at all.

He released his hold on the money. You immediately draw your hand back into your personal bubble, cradling the bundle of cash against your chest as if it will disappear again. Who knows, maybe one of those insane city pigeons would swoop down from the sky and snatch it from you to use in their nest.

“Thank you.” You broke eye contact with him, looking at the bundle in your hands instead. “I’m sorry to have put you through this trouble. I’m sure there were plenty of other things to do tonight… Other crimes to stop and all.”

Ever since the Riddler’s murder spree last year, Gotham’s criminals really seemed to up the ante. Sure, before, there’d be a few weirdos every couple of years but now… now it seemed like everyone was trying to outdo one another. All vying for Batman’s attention.

If you weren’t so unnerved by it all, maybe you’d laugh. But instead, all you could wonder as each criminal was taken down and into custody… What now? Which nightmare would emerge from the shadows next?

“It was a slow night.”

“Well, I’m glad it was.” I would have been killed if you hadn’t found me.

“Clean your wounds before they get infected.”

“I will, don’t worry.” You both stand there for a few more moments, before the screech of your kettle breaks the silence. You turned to look into your apartment, sighing. “Do you want-”

But when you turn back to the balcony he’s gone, the droning of the rain suddenly deafening.

“-To come in.” You finish lamely, not even knowing what you would’ve done if he’d stayed and said yes. The mental image of him sitting in one of your mismatched chairs at the table was funny but incompatible with reality.

No, him leaving like this was better. You’d never see him again and would just remember the night where he saved you, perhaps think about it- reminisce, like a little old lady- when you saw him on the news.

You closed the door again, locking it and pulling the curtain closed. The familiar, anxiety-inducing smell of money wafts up to you and you put the roll on the small table by the sliding door, your makeshift kitchen table that saw more use as a catch-all table than as an eating surface.

When you count the money later, you may have noticed that there was more in the pile than you’d thought before. And you know for a fact that your boss would rather die than pay you more than what you were owed.

It seemed that Batman was more generous than he came across.

Sighing, you pushed aside the extra amount (almost $200 of extra amount), deciding that if you ever ran into him again, you’d make him take it back.

After all, you were beginning to suspect he hadn’t tracked down the thieves in the first place.

part two

#Cross-posting this over here now!#stbotdi #jonathan crane x reader #batman x reader #scarecrow x reader #batman fanfiction #jonathan crane #bruce wayne x reader

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nekoannie-chan · 9 months

Text

Early

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.!Reader.

Word count: 481 words.

Summary: You wanna spend your free time with Steve.

Warnings: Couple surprise, fluff.

A/N: This is my gift to @greenv. HAPPY BIRTHDAY VIRI!

You can read it on Wattpad and Ao3 too.

@saiyanprincessswanie

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

Add yourself to my taglist here.

My other media where I publish: Ao3, Wattpad, ffnet, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter.

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @sinceimetyou @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78 @charmed-asylum @pandaxnienke @real-fbi @smokeandnailz @white-wolf1940 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @xoxonotme @bluemusickid @leyannrae @harrysthiccthighss @marvelatthisone @caplanbuckybarnes @sapphire-rogers @lizzieolseniskinda @notyourtypicalrose @hallecarey1 @nana1000night @talia-rumlow @writingshae @alexxavicry @azulatodoryuga @daemonslittlebitch @chaoticcollectivenightmare @endlesstwanted @chemtrails-club @marigoldreamer @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @here4thefanfics @theestorm @patzammit

You settled into your seat, and in a few minutes, you would arrive at the Triskelion. The mission had been too simple and easy, so you came back early, so you would go to look for Steve at his office. As soon as you arrived, you would invite him to the movies or a restaurant. He had stayed there because that day he would probably be worried as usual.

You practically got off the ship before it finished landing; you even thought you heard someone comment that you were in a hurry, but you didn't care; you wanted to take advantage of the little free time. It was very rare that this kind of situation happened.

You continued on your way, ignoring the others, until you arrived at your boyfriend's office. You immediately opened the door.

"Stevie... "

There was nobody; the office was alone. You looked at the blackboard where he left you messages; maybe he had gone out for a few minutes, so you waited for him for about an hour; however, Steve did not show up.

Maybe he was on some mission too; you dialed him, but he didn't answer. The best thing to do was to go home and wait for him; he would arrive at some point.

On the way back, you started planning what you would do when you got home—maybe a shower and a little spa time would be nice.

When you arrived, you looked out; Steve's motorcycle was gone, which meant he wasn't home either. You lifted your shoulders, and then you would have a good time with yourself and pamper yourself.

You opened the door and immediately put your hand on your gun as you heard a strange noise.

"Y/N? " Steve called out to you while trying to hide something in the oven.

"Steve? " You frowned. The house was supposed to be empty.

"What are you doing here? You were supposed to be on a mission." Steve was trying not to sound nervous as he continued to struggle with the oven door.

"You were supposed to be at work. What are you hiding?" You asked, stepping closer and putting a hand on the oven, ready to open the door.

"You weren't supposed to be here yet; the surprise was supposed to be ready when you got here, and it's not done cooking yet," Steve confessed, taking your hand away so you wouldn't open the oven. "You can go take a shower and make yourself comfortable while I finish preparing the surprise," he asked.

The dinner was spectacular, but you didn't expect the other surprise. After a few minutes of talking about unimportant things, suddenly he was kneeling in front of you, asking you to marry him.

You would be married in less than six months, and you would continue to be as happy as you had been so far.

#Happy Birthday Viri #steve rogers x reader

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chemistryread · 2 years

Text

disclaimers/tags: female oc. written as a reader insert but reader has a lot of backstory. slowburn. angst. implied domestic violence. minors dni.

a/n: some rash decisions on this one, get ready! if you love angst as much as me, this can be read as the ending, but there’s another chapter coming :) also very sorry at how long this post is, but i really wanted to make this story 4 chapters so ! anyways, enjoy and thanks all of u who have liked, rbed or commented in some way 🫶

right cowboy, wrong time

rhett abbott

part 1

part 2

summary: you’re not home and your boyfriend’s a dick. thankfully, not all cowboys are bad.

"Did you sleep with someone else?"

"Did you?"

That was basically it.

(There was a lot of screaming and attempted emotional blackmailing you don’t bring up. What would be the point?)

You're retelling the events to Dani, working side by side with her.

A kid had joined the staff, and since he's still in school he needs the night shift. Now, you're bumped back to mornings alongside your friend. Things are looking up.

"I can't believe it was solved with one non-violent conversation."

She's actively ignoring the marks in your arms but you take her selective blindness as good-spirited. Focus on the good.

With that in mind, you don't mention how close you got to apologizing and taking it back when he questioned your ability to be alone. Saying you'd only fall on hard times once more and return to him for help. But...you were alone before him, and you were okay before him. It will work.

"I know. I mean, I'm not at all under the impression that he’s not planning some sort of revenge, mulling it over. He'll still be around for another two weeks. And we can't pretend that didn't play a huge part into how well he took it."

"Took it. Right." She laughs, handing you the clean menus to set on the counter. "Be honest. He was aware that this was the only way to do it without exhibiting lack of power. Like it was beyond anyone's control."

During your conversation, it was made clear that he did not yield, you agreed it was unsalvageable. Stupid to keep trying. And he wasn’t stupid. Dani’s right.

"Hey, I'm not disagreeing. Or complaining."

Her smile falters and you frown.

"I have to say, though, I was convinced you would not fall for him."

She shoves the pen and paper in your hands, along with three menus, and spins you around towards the tables.

If it isn't the little Abbotts and Amelia. Just your luck.

You do not regret it. At all. It would be spoiled of you to.

However, it obviously soured things between you and Rhett. Which is precisely what you did not want.

You meant it, when you said you didn't want to be one of his girls. In a way. You would either take him (yes, take him) out on a date and do the whole process with an open heart, or shut him out and remain nothing but the friendly waitress until you left for home and never saw him again.

The way things are right now, you can't possibly do either with an honest face.

And honesty is a huge thing for you. The motivator behind admitting to being unfaithful that night, putting yourself in a risky situation in front of your boyfriend. Ex.

Amy's smile when she sees you approach the table helps you believe in the good things again, even if only for a couple of minutes.

"Yes! I told my dad, if any of the other girls tried to serve us, I was gonna fake cry until we got you."

Rhett avoids you, taking a coin left as part of the tip from the previous seaters and flipping it between his fingers.

You wink at her and point your pen to Perry, before clicking it. "You're raising her right. What can I, and only I, get you guys?"

His cap is not wide enough to hide the circles under his eyes, and he orders a standard hangover breakfast. You exchange shy nods, but it's not confident.

Amelia’s next.

"And if I could have that with a side of that story your stupid boyfriend didn't want to read, please?"

Your jaw hangs open. She's a rockstar.

"Amy, she said no once, don't push it."

She glares at her uncle.

Perry adds, “And don't call people stupid."

"But he was! Stupid and rude."

Your giggle draws the table's eyes.

"No, he was. About time we broke up."

Her dad looks impressed, like he thought he would never see the day. It bothers you a little. You don't have the guts to look at Rhett, even if you can feel his eyes on you.

"Really?" She asks excited, and you nod. "Cool! So you can marry my dad or uncle Rhett and then you'll be in the family forever."

"Jesus."

"Amy!"

You laugh again. These men do not appreciate her humour and it's kind of sad.

"I'm too young to get married, kid! I'm not a child bride." It flies over her head but Perry laughs. You'll win him over someday. "About the story, I'm afraid I got rid of that one, it wasn't good. But when I start working on something new I'll ask you for help, deal?"

She nods with tight lips, silky straight hair shaking down her shoulders.

"Good. I'll be right back with your food."

It’s a busy morning, so they had no choice but to sit at an unclean table. You’re retrieving the plates, stacking them up against your left arm and shoving the bills into your apron’s pocket. That’s when Rhett taps the coin on the table three times, startling you.

Your eyes snap to his. Unreadable. Pupils large, deep blue flooding your insides. Nearly choking on it. He offers you the coin, you open your palm, and he drops it. All whilst maintaining eye contact. Honestly, you feared breaking it, as if the second you did your memories of each other would be erased. He doesn’t look away. Your eyebrows furrow, blinking a couple of times, clearing your throat and walking away with a weak step.

Dani mouths, what the fuck?

Your best guess is none, shrugging and taking the dirty dishes to the kitchen.

They eat peacefully, and you suspect Amelia got a talking to from her father because she sticks to polite smiles when you serve them.

They leave as you take another family's order. Back at the counter, Danielle kicks you in the calf.

"What?"

Your coworker simply nods to the back. The butterflies in your stomach can only mean one person.

Stubbornly, you fight off the urge to fix yourself or take in your reflection off the windows before stepping outside to meet Rhett.

He looks cuddly in a hoodie.

"What are you smiling at?"

Hearing his mumbled teasing is like being lift straight out of hell and into heaven.

"What do you want?"

"Asked you first."

You bite the inside of your cheek, hands clasped behind your back, playing with your rings. Hiding your nerves from him.

"Cool hoodie you got on."

"Fuck off."

You two burst into outright gross, happy giggles.

"So?"

"Were you gonna tell me you broke up?"

Your answer is fire rapid, delighting in petty revenge. "No. It's not like I'm running away with you."

He tsks once, hit.

"Right. But if you'd like to-"

"Don't." No, don't look at me like that. "I can't. Not yet."

He takes a deep breath, as if entirely too used to your bullshit, and steps closer. You let him.

"Explain."

"Yes, well, one of his ventures sailed off in Montana. He's going to move there for a while. But not yet." He looks too hopeful, and the full story scratches up your throat. "He knows I slept with someone."

A more somber expression, but he still doesn't get it. Briefly, you wonder if 'sleeping with' was too formal for what you actually did together.

"He doesn't know it's you." Your arms fall back to your sides, nails digging into your palms. "If he finds out-"

"I can handle him. Trust me."

"Look, hotshot, it's not about that. Sure, he'd probably threaten to punch any other guy who had his way with me. But one of you? And it's not like you took advantage of me, I chose you. I- I seeked you out. I wanted you. That's a whole other…I've seen what he can do when he's actually mad. When he loses. He'll want to fucking kill you."

"He's not that dangerous. You're being ridiculous."

"Hey, don't tell me I'm being ridiculous when I have suffered in his hands." He doesn't say anything to that. "Just get this through your proud little thick skull…If he hurts you because of me, it'll hate myself. Spare me, okay?"

His features soften at your confession. You wish he would simply accept circumstances for his own well-being, but if he won't, you'll appeal to his sensitive side.

"When does he leave?"

"Two weeks. I'm moving in with Dani tonight."

You didn't protest when she offered the extra room at her place, wanting out of that house before his brothers could give you a piece of their minds.

Rhett squints at the sun, hands on his hips, worn gloves poking out of his pant's pockets. He looks so much younger in the green cap and a plain gray hoodie.

"I can wait two weeks."

You want to run up to him, kiss the breakfast grease off his lips until Danielle calls you back inside to help her, run your fingers through his hair, feel the fabric tasked with warming him up.

Instead, scared he doesn't want any of that, you roll your eyes amusedly and run up the steps. You should set a calendar reminder for two weeks from now.

——————————

Thirteen days. He leaves tomorrow, finally.

In the meantime, he uncharacteristically leaves you alone. It's a very peaceful time in your life.

Rhett comes to the diner from time to time. You bump into each other at the shop and he ends up helping you put away the groceries at Danielle's, where he sees the begonias in a vase by the window. He relocates them to a better spot.

He learns more about your university and you about his family.

You put that knowledge to test one afternoon, when he comes by during your break and asks if you want to have lunch at his house. Royal eats very little and quickly returns to work, just as you had been told he would. Amy skipped school because she woke up particularly down and missing her mother (probably why Rhett thought of inviting you), therefore Perry eats even less but spends more time at the table, just looking at his daughter. You feel for him, really.

Cecilia is the one who suggests you go rest under the shade while Perry helps her clean up. You get the sense his mood is entirely affected by his daughter's, so mother and son need a moment to talk.

Amelia sits between you and Rhett, all three quietly eating fresh strawberries.

"Grandpa did say somebody messed with them. They're not as good."

You disagree. They taste pretty delicious for you, who's in the midst of licking the juice off your lips, satisfied.

But you know what she means, unfortunately. So you purposefully avoid Rhett's eyes, leaning back against the tree trunk and guiltly keeping your mouth shut.

He assured you this has happened for as long as he remembers being neighbors with your ex and his brothers.

Trying to dissipate the tension in the air, you poke Amy on the side.

"I've been writing something. Wanna read it?"

She almost drools when she smiles, shoving the open jar on her uncle's stomach and getting him sticky with splashed strawberry juice.

Reaching for your phone, you remember something.

"Oh, I bought a really pretty vase to put the even prettier flowers you got me, look!"

Rhett sits up awkwardly beside his niece as you show her a picture of the golden hour sunlight shining on the pink begonias.

"I didn't get you any flowers." She matches your confused expression. "I've been told off by grandma way too many times from messing around in her garden to do it again. But it does look really pretty."

Rhett's cheeks are burning red, and your stomach is doing flips.

Completely lost for words, you switch from the photos app to a Google drive document and hand the little girl your phone with tremendous trust. Kids are brutally honest.

"Here. It's, uhm, a horror short."

She picks it up with toddler-like grabby hands and sits back to enjoy it like it's a new young adult best seller.

Your eyes are still on the boy next to her, who's holding your gaze in an electric back and forth.

"Can I read it?"

"No."

After devouring four-thousand words, Amelia runs back to the house, shaking your phone at her dad's face, practically bragging that you let her read something of yours. Her first impression is pretty positive, if not over-the-top, and she tells you she'll write down her ideas and 'get back to you'.

Everyone chuckles when you shake her hand as if this was a business meeting. Her being the big publishing agent, of course.

Cecilia makes a comment about rushing back home, there being a lot of work to be done, when you gather your stuff so Rhett can drive you back to the diner. You simply smile at her.

You're biting your tongue, busying yourself with lowering the passenger side's window, but Rhett's getting a little too good at reading you.

"Speak now or-"

"I'm not dumb, you don't have to protect me." He laughs, unphased by your random instances of snappiness. "Of course it has something to do with me, Rhett. You think people don't talk?"

"We're not even doing anything."

"But there's a 'we', that's enough to create gossip. And I told him I had been with someone. The fight at the bar, the 4th when you knocked on his door holding my coat…You really think he hasn't put everything together?"

He's quiet. Rhett is not stupid, what he is is inconsequential. He thinks everything will always be ok.

"We have fought over girls before, it's always been like this."

It stings, to be put in such a common role in his life.

"Well," He turns his head your way, hearing how your voice wavers, and you cross your arms defensively. "I'm glad they didn't worry like I do, but I do. Your family has nothing to do with this. Your dad shouldn't have this put on his plate too."

"He'll be fine, trust me, he likes the work. He lives for it. Always has, since we were little boys. He's fine."

You just don't want your ex-boyfriend and his brothers taking things too far.

"I think your mother doesn't like me anymore."

He cackles and you pout. Of course you sound silly, you know that. But maybe this is what it's all about. His family are good people. You don't want good people to dislike you, or go through anything bad because of you.

It's not their fault you cling to those who seem nice and helpful. Sometimes you forget yourself. That you have been and can be alone. Being single is a great moment to capitalize on your independence, accept it. At least that way you won’t take anyone down with you.

Fingers snapping pull you out of your self-reproach.

"Don't…Don't spiral over what she said, alright? She just wants me to stick to the work, be responsible and stuff. Not wander off."

"Maybe you should."

Blue eyes search yours for a sign that you're kidding. Infuriating that you can't trust yourself not to breakdown around Rhett, you look straight ahead. One block away from the diner.

Your body is free of the seatbelt before the light can turn green again. "I can get out here, it's fine."

He doesn't move, and you stare at each other for what feels like minutes. Then he swallows, looks down, and unlocks the doors.

You hop out, carefully stepping around the car and onto the sidewalk. He calls out your name and a shiver runs down your spine, both because of how heartbreakingly confused he sounds and because you're scared one of your ex-boyfriend's brothers or friends just heard Rhett Abbott yell for you from his truck.

Turning around, you glance up and down the street, sighing in relief when everyone seems to continue their lives without noticing you two. You want to say sorry for being weird, for not being a better liar or knowing how to mask your feelings. But it would serve you more than him, at this point.

Instead, you step up to his window, hand closing around his own that is hanging halfway out and squeezing it.

All you say is, "Thank you."

——————————

You're a mess all day.

Spilled drinks, dropped knives and even a broken glass.

Danielle has to pull you out of your own head every five minutes, she's exhausted by the end of your shift.

You felt childish, telling her boy gossip at work. Ridiculous even, since she scrunches her nose when reminded the boy is Rhett Abbott.

Nothing against him, per se, he was just always such a predictable choice in high school, she had said. Good heart, though.

She ruthlessly mocks your insecurities but dutifully listens to your ramblings. Your worries about harming his family, moving on too fast, disappointing Amelia.

A wet dishcloth fight starts in the kitchen when she suggests you're in a little deeper than you had assumed. You hit her right across the stomach before she can profess the term 'in love'.

Because no, you refuse. He's a good boy, and you are attracted to him. You like him, obviously. Too obvious to deny. But you have to hold back.

Actually, until tomorrow. Perhaps that's why you're freaking out. When your ex leaves, everything becomes more real between you and Rhett. Or it's allowed to. It's your choice.

Dani and you are handing the night shift waiters your aprons when your phone pings.

"When was your last fun Saturday night? We're at the same bar as always. Danielles welcome. First rounds on us"

Somewhere in your texts - texting Rhett all day long at work was starting to get on Lenny's nerves, you should watch out - you had mentioned it was bound to be a girl's night at home, since Shiree was staying at a friend's for the night.

It's her first time too, so you had imagined pizza and wine to be a good way to keep Dani's heart at ease. But this could work too.

You show her the text, and she immediately smiles. You know it's been a while.

Eighteen. That's how old you were the last time you got to dress up as a single woman for a night out.

You're aware this isn't Boston, however. Tricking an entitled Harvard Law alumni into paying for your drinks is not up for grabs tonight, so you don't go too overboard. Still, Dani is a little speechless when she comes out of the shower. Right back at her, honestly (even though she definitely looks local and you don't).

Danielle drives to the bar, and you're already having a great time critiquing her stiff driving, begging her to relax.

"Wait, Perry's not thinking that we…"

"No, I don't think so."

"Good, makes things less awkward when you and his little brother make your eventual escape."

"That's not going to happen." She looks at you like she really doesn't believe that. You point two other trucks in the parking lot, owned by your ex and his brothers. "Even if I wanted to, it's not a good idea."

"Shit, I'm sorry. Do you want to leave? We can still get pizza."

You smile at her, sincere. You'll miss her so much.

"It's fine, I figured. It's his last day. Hopefully, we will all stay on different sides of the room and he will be enjoying his going-away party too much to care about lil' old me."

Perry's hand comes up as soon as you step inside.

Both of them do a doubletake of your outfit, lingering on the bright red cliché cowboy boots, but you decide to pretend you don't feel their eyes on your bare legs. Rhett gets up to greet you (you honestly didn't expect him to) and your words slip out before you can contain them.

"You smell good." He laughs, and Dani groans a playful 'oh my God' behind you. He's pink. You pat him in the shoulder with a sympathetic smile. "Sorry."

"I'll get another round."

Perry gets up to greet you as well and struts to the bar.

Rhett finds it strange when you take the seat across from him, instead of by his side, but you decide to stick to a good behaviour tonight.

The four of you fall easily into conversation. It's nice when they speak about their school memories and you get to listen, watch them remember and cringe at their old selves.

Your legs are stretched under the table, incidentally in between Rhett's spread legs. He gives you a small kick whenever he catches you looking over the divider to guarantee your ex is not searching for you. So far, so breezy. It's weird.

The other two drink faster, which is why, you assume, Dani jumped at the opportunity to dance with an old flame the minute he recognized her. Perry went to the bathroom.

It's just you and him.

He looks mostly sober and his tanned skin is glowing nicely under the bar's scarce lighting. His hair looks especially droopy.

You smile at him sheepishly.

"I'm sorry, I have to ask. The begonias. What was that about?"

"Oh, God. C'mon. Do you have to?"

The words push through gritted teeth, his entire body recoils in embarrassment.

You simply nod, leaning forward with a teasing grin.

When you do, your legs draw back, but not too much. He doesn't let them. His boots trap your ankles, dragging them forward, closer again.

Rhett’s pupils darken at the way you jump and you bite your cheeks so hard your dimples cave impossibly deep.

It'd be stupid not to take advantage of the moment. You blink slowly. "Please?"

Teeth trap his lower lip, but he quickly rolls his shoulders back.

"It was me. You figured that much." He looks at your for confirmation. Amelia wasn't subtle, and he was even less. "Why did I lie? Uhm, I- Shit, after you said you used to hang out with street racers, well, I felt like a loser giving you flowers from my mother's garden."

You laught at his face. Unabashedly. A nice surprise when he actually laughs along.

"Stupid, right?"

You love when he acts shy. Mousy.

"No. I never got flowers before. I would've liked knowing they were from you."

Your heart beats faster at how wide open this moment is. He did something no one has ever done for you, and you liked it. You liked that he did. And you just told him that.

"More than if they were from Amy?"

You can't look away from his eyes.

"Yes. But don't tell her that."

Perry scares the two of you by slapping the table. He's very much drunk.

"Your turn to get the drinks."

He points at Rhett, who hesitates before awkwardly smiling at you and sliding out of his seat.

The older Abbott is kind of all over the place, so you return his favor from many nights ago and look away, turning your attention to a very relaxed Danielle enjoying the dancefloor.

"I just talked to them in the toilet, you know." The brother finally directs his words at you. He must think you were looking for your ex's table. "They're not happy about this. At all. And they don't like when folks think they're idiots."

"I know. I don't mean to-"

"Yeah, you never do. But all of you who get obssessed with my little brother did not grow up here. You haven't dealt with- You don't know what these lands are like. Consequently, you don't understand the people. Who can blame you?"

You think obssessed is mean.

"I'm sorry, Perry."

"Appreciate that. Still should leave him alone. You've played with him long enough, don't you agree?"

You sip your beer. His eyes are looking past you, venting to no one in particular. Not personal.

"Right."

As a reflex, you look for Rhett. The reason why he is taking so long leaning next to him, making him stutter and laugh.

"Oh, yeah, and then there's that." Perry points the bottom of his beer at Maria. "Sixteen. The first time I saw him look at her like that, and he still does. Not a difference. My folks believe he'll marry her, if he ever gets the chance to."

"What are you saying, Perry?"

You're running out of patience. You never liked people who only spoke their true feelings when intoxicated, while you made an effort to be honest all the time. Well, guess you haven't been doing much of that here.

"Look, you're fine. But who are we kidding? You want big things, you go to a fancy school, you probably drink cocktails during happy hour."

You feel small when he laughs. His attention turns to his brother letting the beer sweat on the counter, transfixed on Maria talking. That's all she's doing, and he looks gone for. Her hand is on his shoulder and he's leaning into it.

"Bless him. He's never gonna leave. And he deserves to find love here, with a nice girl who knows what this place is about, how to deal with a guy like him. And with his family."

If you had eaten anything, it would be coming up.

Did you embarrass yourself with his mother, with Royal? Was there something in the story Amy read that was inappropriate? Did they make fun of you behind your back, at Sunday lunch?

A million thoughts swarm your brain.

"Shit, I didn't mean to make you cry, I'm sorry."

Perry laughs again, with his whole body, and it draws Rhett's attention from the bar. You look away.

"Don't worry about it."

His eyes widen, instant sobriety, seeing you stand up. Before Rhett can join you back at the table, you're fleeing to the bathroom.

When you reach the door, someone walks out of the men's. Your eyes meet, and your ex is the second guy to laugh at you in the span of sixty seconds.

A young girl leaves one of the stalls and lets you borrow her eyedrops, and in a record three minutes, you're walking to the table as if nothing happened.

Rhett is trying to convince Perry to finish the beer in front of him before getting another and Dani is nowhere to be seen.

You're happy for her, letting her hair down. Selfishly, you also think that if she were at the table she would see right through you and ask what's wrong, and you'd start crying all over again. These boys don't have the feeling for that sort of stuff. Good.

The youngest does search your face extensively, however, reaching for your hands under the table. You pull away, leaning your head on them.

You ask Perry about Amelia, a subject you know will make him go on for hours. Ten minutes in, Dani rejoins you with a bit of a flushed look. You smile at her and let the proud father continue.

With three other people there to react and respond, your mind takes the liberty to drag you out of the moment and consider what you've been told.

It isn't wrong.

You don't belong here. Maybe Rhett thinks you are his ticket out, but you don't want to take him away from his family. No, he doesn't want that either. He's better off with someone who, as said, knows this life. Their identity meshing with the dry air, blending in with the colorful streamers in the arena every weekend. Rolls with the punches, all the machismo, better. Can be happy with and despite.

Unfinished business waits for you in Boston. A life. Your life.

And Maria. You won't pretend to know her very well, but she seems liked wherever she goes. Fondly remembered and broadly welcomed. Nice, beautiful, educated and most of all familiar. Ran away from her hometown long enough to be interesting, returned in enough time to be seen as grateful. Prodigal daughter.

The way you have seen him look at her. Bask in her warmth.

It's a really sweet tale.

You think of how often you brought his peaceful mood down with your own paranoia. You took the prize he won to help yourself. How many times did he become anxious and upset when he was around you?

Standing in his way is the worst thing you can do to someone, a family who is kind.

You don't want him to think you were using him or to notice any changes (yet), so when Perry and Dani finish talking about their kids, you spark back to life to ask if anybody's hungry.

"It's early enough that we can still get that pizza."

The perfect comfort food. You nearly melt into her, the two of you holding hands and getting up. "Are you…?"

"Why wouldn't we?"

Rhett asks, and he seems apprehensive. Did you fail already?

Dani shoots you a weird, questioning look.

"I don- I don't know. Just asking."

Perry is still tipsy, heedless. "Want to ask Maria if she wants to come?"

Your hand is painfully squeezed by Dani, and you squeeze back to avoid any awkwardness.

"What?"

"Just saying."

They're standing nose to nose, and it's weird to watch.

You clear your throat, tugging Danielle forward. "We're going! Walking out the door now!"

It breaks your heart when Rhett jogs behind you, catching up and hugging you from behind, swinging your body to the side like he's going to pick you up. He notices your laugh is strained.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah-"

"Abbott!"

You should've made a more discreet exit.

"Yes?” His arms slip away from your form, turning towards your ex-boyfriend, and you enter a state of panic. “I'm all ears."

You almost move to pull him back before catching yourself. Filled by a weird feeling of deja vu. This is ridiculous.

"Did you think I wouldn't kick your ass on my last night?"

"Try me."

"Hey, don't touch-"

Big hands push Perry, and he stumbles back before you and Dani catch him.

Fed up, you place yourself in the line of sight of both men. Not exactly in between them, but close.

Rhett looks at you for a significant amount of time considering the tempers. It's a clear message. Go ahead, if you want, but I won't entertain it.

"Really, she's got you on a leash already? I have to hand it to ya, I never thought-"

You walk towards him, pulling on his arm for the last time, so you can talk. Eye to eye.

It's hard to say what the other three can hear. You're not whispering, but it's for you and him only.

"It's over. You and I are fucking free. Aren't you relieved? I am. And look at you-" You pat him on the chest, with a proud smile. "Big things in Montana. Lots to look forward to. And you're still stuck on this? Both of us are meant for greater things than this town and anyone in it. Let go."

Lying through your fucking teeth. This place has rotten you.

He smiles, hat casting a shadow over your eyes.

"See, I knew you never stopped being smart."

You return his grin. Sick.

"And you're smarter than your brothers. Tell them to stop messing with the Abbott land before you get a chunky lawsuit. It's not worth it."

Glossy eyes roll to the back of his head, hands on his hips. Doesn't admit it, but not arguing. You smile, self-satisfied.

"Have a good one."

Before you can walk away, he grabs your wrist. Rhett takes a step forward and Danielle tries to cuss him out but is scared of him too, and it dies in her throat.

"You know he's in love with the other girl, right?"

Two seconds ago, he was a big man ready to get physical. Now he's whispering in your ear, fighting dirty.

You sigh, and look straight into his eyes. Laying everything out for him, more than he deserves.

"I know."

He lets go of you, and you flash a last fake smile for him, before walking away.

"And you're okay with that?"

He yells. The others act as bystanders, trying to piece together your conversation.

"Don't worry." You exclaim already on your way to Dani's truck, loud enough for him to hear. "Didn't mean anything."

Readjusts his hat, shakes his head. Boisterous laugh. To Rhett, he says, “Another time. I feel sorry for you, now.”

You look past Rhett's puzzled face, shrugging. Your ex goes back inside.

"Can't believe that worked."

Dani comes up to you, tossing her keys into your hands. You grin. Smart woman.

"Pizza. Please." Perry mumbles like a sedated patient, Rhett helping him stay up.

"Try and keep up."

It's all you say before climbing behind the wheel, releasing a big exhale. Face muscles sore from the strain of forcing yourself to smile so many times in one conversation.

"Okay?" Dani caresses your arms. Smart fucking woman.

The taste in your mouth is revolting, stomach sinking as the words echo in your head. Sorry for him, what an asshole. And you propped him up to believe it, to say it to his face. Lying is taking a real toll on you.

"Will be."

Your emotions are behind your fast driving, as they have always been. Dani's tipsy fit of laughter is an added bonus to the experience.

Perry is just as delighted when you park.

"What the hell, woman?"

You clear the hair in your mouth, smiling wide at the brothers.

"Just showing off. Who's hungry? I'm starving."

Due to your recent change of plans, you have decided a night eating pizza with a group of nice people could be a good lasting memory.

No more overthinking and paranoia. For tonight.

They all look happier when you pretend everything's fine. (Rhett's smile is actually not reaching his eyes, and it concerns you over how much he heard, but you will not think about that tonight).

You'll leave when you're supposed to and they will recover very well.

——————————

The Abbotts come in for breakfast a few times. Even Royal.

Every time, you stash the tips they leave for you in Danielle's box.

You have enough money to go home, pay for your last year and support yourself until you find a job. Actually, you've had it for over a week.

It's hard to imagine leaving. Saying goodbye is terrible. You think about Amy. Part of you wants to pretend like you're way short just so you can stay a little longer.

To silence that part, you buy your ticket and call the university, arranging your schedule. There's a date. And a ridiculous cancel fee.

The following week is spent soaking up the familial nights with Dani and Shiree, watching Pixar movies and eating ice cream.

Giving Lenny a precocious Christmas present. An air freshener for his car, he kept mumbling about his husband asking for one but forgetting to buy it.

Visiting the Abbotts.

Cecilia and Royal appreciate the company of a new person not trying to steal, buy or camp on their land. You give Amy two of your favorite books, a horror novel and one on writing. She promises not to snitch on you.

Perry takes you on a horse walk and you forgive him. He has no recollection of telling you anything, instead, he talks about how much he loves his brother, wants the best for him. It eases your initial reaction that night.

Rhett asks for a date. Friday night. Drive-in movies. You have a whole argument about whether or not it should be official.

"If it's a racing movie, will you say yes?"

"Only if it's Tokyo Drift. I love Han."

(It isn't. It's Grease 2 for, what he says, the third time that year.)

He doesn't understand why you want to go 'as friends'. It's really hard, too, because you've secretly always dreamed about a small town drive-in date.

He gets the better of you.

You go, and hold hands, and he kisses you in his truck. You joke about the windows fogging up. He drops you off at Danielle's with another kiss. A proper goodbye, slow. Hands on your ass and wet noises that you hope the neighbors don't hear. (Danielle does and mocks you relentlessly.)

He invites you to have dinner with his family the next day. You leave on Tuesday morning.

You're washing the dishes while he dries them. Perry brings a sleepy Amelia in his arms to kiss you goodnight. She compliments your strawberry-patterned dress for the tenth time. Royal and Cecilia watch TV on the couch, nearly asleep themselves.

"I think he doesn't know how to tell you, but Perry likes having you around Amy. Like a big sister she never got."

The sponge slips out of your hands, thoughts of his brother's drunken words coming back to you. Actually, this is as good a segue as you're going to get.

"Mhm, I don't know."

"What?"

"I adore her, obviously. But I'm more like the young English teacher she apparently missed out on. Which is a real shame, those are important when you're growing up."

"Don't get a lot of young teachers around here."

He's watching you suspiciously as you hand him the last plate. Too used to your bullshit.

"I'm just saying, maybe I'm not the role model for a little girl like her. I have no family, no prospects, a regrettable love life. I'm an abandoned Bostonian, for crying out loud. Struggling to pay for school and a small apartment, for myself. Not really the poster child for a bright and respectable future in the western lands."

Rhett carries the dry plates back to the cupboard.

"I don't like it when you talk about yourself like that." Please, shut up. Don't be nice now, I'm trying to get at something. "You're just different from us. And, just 'cause she likes you doesn't mean she wants to be you."

You think about the writing book you gave her. What a hypocrite you are.

"Younger siblings tend to look up to the older." He smiles, as if you're personally attacking him. "Hey, you brought up the metaphorical sister stuff. I said teacher."

"So you're teaching her to be you?"

"No! I-" You groan and steal the cloth from his shoulder to slap him with. Folding it in your hand, you swallow your feelings to be able to muster your sentence. "All I mean is that, yes, she should have a good influence in her life that isn't related to her by blood. But it should be someone who is consistent, similar. Someone she can relate to but also trust. Possibly, someone she already knows. That all of you do."

You're struggling not to say her name.

"Are you or are you not talking about yourself?"

He's genuinely confused and you sigh into the folded dishtowel. "Nevermind."

The parents sleep soundly, leaning on each other. You think of how long they’ve been together, how much they’ve gone through. Still so supportive of each other and their family. It’s a nice reality you know nothing about.

Cautious not to wake the couple on the couch, you step carefully around the living room and pick up your discarded coat and purse. You're trying to quietly slip on your Vans when Rhett puts a hand behind your back to steady you.

"I was thinking you could stay."

Glad to have strong arms to hold onto, you nearly let yourself fall back into him, basking in the unapologetic seduction in his words. But you think of the disrespect of having sex while his family is sleeping, sneaking out of the room many girls have snuck out of before, just to move back home in three days.

"I really should go." You smile. "But I'm gonna need help walking in these to Dani's truck without falling on my ass."

He laughs. "Useless fuckin' shoes."

Light rain is still falling, rattling the leaves. It smells amazing. You see the dogs taking cover in the driveway.

You'll miss this so much.

The two of you walk like senior citizens, shuffling your feet to avoid an accident, to the car.

"Okay. Thanks."

You chuckle as he opens the door.

Quickly, you throw your stuff on the passenger seat and climb inside, very obviously avoiding saying a real, kiss-involving, goodbye to him.

He squints his eyes but opts for brushing it off, complimenting you instead.

"You look really pretty tonight."

Don't think about him saying it to her when you hand him over in a platter.

"Thank you. So do you."

You're smiling, but not moving to touch each other.

After a beat, he gives up.

"Alright, goodnight. Drive safe." He steps back, hands in his pockets. You think of a teenage Rhett saying goodbye to his dates. "Like a normal person would."

An awkward, disingenuous laugh. Turning the ignition. Calm before the storm.

"Night."

Your foot is on the pedal before you can regret everything. Before you can tell him that you're so sorry about leaving this way.

In the rearview mirror, you watch him wait until you're completely outside of the gate, then jog back inside.

The whole way home, you think you're going to cry. But you're empty. Resolute.

On Sunday, you ignore his calls, eventually texting him that you're busy with Danielle and you'll talk tomorrow.

It's all true.

Dani had been an unbelievable friend, so you figured she deserved to know that you were leaving before everyone else.

Truthfully, you expected a better reaction.

She had seen you save money, she knows you want to finish school and that if it weren't for her, you'd have nothing keeping you here. She pulls the full truth out of you and you agree that the Abbotts would be a reason to stay.

Except they aren't.

You tell her all about Perry's accidental revelation, the logic behind your sudden leave and why it is better this way.

"Don’t you think Perry would only say that if he was scared his brother is falling in love with you?"

You glared at her, then. Begging silently to not be encouraged in favor of optimism and romance.

"No. He made it clear he thought I was wasting his time, preventing him from being with the person he actually needs."

"Maria? They’ve had their chance and neither of them has ever done anything about it, that should say enough."

"Dani-"

"And, so what? Your feelings don’t matter, are not worth seeing through because he had a crush on the girl everyone had a crush on?"

Reinforcing how desired she is doesn’t help.

"Please. Stop."

It's safe to say she doesn't agree, and she calls you a moron a handful of times, but ultimately concedes when she sees you've made up your mind.

"I think you'll regret the way you're going about it. But I've also never seen you backtrack on a decision. For better or worse, we'll see."

She helps you pack and write your resignation letter, and you end the night watching another Pixar movie with Shiree and ice cream.

Your phone sits on the bedside table all day, untouched.

—————————

It's Monday, your last here.

Lenny is the most supportive, happy to hear you're going to finish school. He requests that you send graduation pictures, and it's a great idea.

You and Dani spend your entire shift attached to the hip as it's a slow day, talking about how she'll be miserable again at work and you will look for her in every diner you go to.

Like a storm to finish the day, a sweaty Amelia Abbott bursts through the doors. Did she run here?

"Is it true?"

"Amy, what are you-"

"Shiree said you're leaving tomorrow. Is it true?"

You look back at Danielle, who has an apologetic look on her face. Turning back to the little girl, you're ready to beg for forgiveness at the sight of her blue eyes filling up with tears.

"Oh, Amy, I was gonna say goodbye."

She turns and runs out of the diner. Danielle is already dialing Perry to let him know that he should drive past the school. Right after, she bolts out of the back door to go get her before she gets too far.

The heartbroken child sulks into her father's car, and you watch from the counter.

Dani comes back inside, walks past you into the lockeroom, and comes back again with her own keys.

"There's like an hour left."

"It's your last day, he won't even notice, go."

You sit there, picking your words, before starting the truck. For someone who calls herself a writer, you're often out of right things to say.

The quiet inside the house when you knock is daunting.

Perry opens the door, and he looks distressed, almost pleading for you to come in and explain.

Inside, Rhett is looking at you in disbelief.

"I was going to say goodbye, I promise."

"Can somebody, please, tell me what's going on?"

It's funny that Rhett, expert mutterer, is the one who understood what a crying Amelia was saying. Now, you can hear soft sobs from one of the rooms with the door closed.

"I'm going home tomorrow. Back to university. Quit today. I only told Danielle yesterday, but she told Shiree so she wouldn't have a shock and then she told Amelia at school."

The father looks unsurprised, which in turn surprises you.

You point to the closed bedroom door. "Can I try?"

He nods.

You sit down in front of the door, knocking first.

"Amy, it's me. I'm sorry. I was going to say goodbye. I'm sorry you found out this way, really." You breathe in. "Look, I have one year left. Remember when I showed you the campus pictures? I love that place. I love what I study. I want to be able to practice it. It's…who I am. I'm going after what I most want. We talked about doing things for ourselves, right? That's all this is, okay? My number stays the same, and you can send me any draft you write, anytime. Or questions your stubborn old English teachers don't want to answer. Any book report you need help with. I'm not too far away, Amy. It'll be fine."

Your eyes are closed, brows furrowed in hopes that she's actually listening instead of shoving her earbuds in like you used to when your foster parents tried to discipline you.

There's more that you wan't to promise her. That she can visit you, that you'll write letters to each other to practice, that you'll come see her. But that would make you too present in the Abbotts' life. You made sure she can reach out to you if she needs, and your communication will be direct. If you sent a letter, everyone at the house would be reminded of your existence. It's not what you're after.

There's no response, so you stand up, smoothing your clothes silently.

Rhett's chair screeches against the floor and he swings the front door wide open, stepping outside. It's your cue to follow. Perry stops you on the way to say he'll try and get Amy to come out and hug you goodbye, which you find oddly sympathetic.

You lean against the porch, watching him pace in front of you.

"I don't get it."

"C'mon. You funded part of my back to school campaign. Hardly a surprise that I'm going back to school, is it?"

"Don't be fucking sassy with me now."

You take a deep breath, preparing to fill the shoes of the asshole. It's deserving.

"Rhett-"

"What? How are you gonna defend this? Amy's heartbroken. Again. You think she likes to be left like this? Time after time. And with no warning. Swept off her feet."

You suspect he's not talking about his niece.

"I'm sorry."

"Sure, yeah." He finally stops pacing. You're standing in front of him, your hands clasped in front of your body, eyes burning against the sun. "I thought…"

"I apologize if I lead you on-"

"You didn't lead me on, kitten, you meant it. What happened to your honesty? Why are you lying to me?"

Right into your lap.

"That's the thing, Rhett. I don't know. Ever since I've been here, what I've done the most is lie. Sneak around. I don't like it. I don't belong here, and it shows."

"Bullshit! Who told you that? Was it one of those blonde fucking pricks?"

"Please, I can't have thoughts of my own?"

"Not insecure ones like this, no."

This is more hurtful than what you imagined. But it's good that he's being honest. You'll remember these words forever and probably be too embarrassed to return here.

"Like I said, I'm sorry."

He throws his hat on the ground, stepping right up to you, grabbing your hands in his.

"Stop fighting yourself."

It shakes you to your core, to hear what you needed to all your life. And from someone who you…

You can't.

"Jesus, Rhett! Wake up!" You push his hands away. "This is your life, your family. Doesn't it matter to you? It's not about me. You need to step up for them, and I'm not the girl who's going to get you there, I'm just not! So you need to find her. If you haven't already."

His blue eyes have never been icier. You can imagine what he thinks of you now. Manipulative. Spoiled. Deceiving.

In the background, Royal's sprinting on top of a horse, cussing angrily. You question Rhett.

"What's up with him?"

He runs a hand across his forehead, reluctant.

"Our dear neighbors are convinced we trespassed their property and are legally demanding we give it back. It's a, uh, considerable amount of good land."

You feel like snapping that useless piece of shit in two. Had it not been enough? To tell him that it meant nothing, that you weren't going to stay with him or feed into this silly rivalry…

You praised him while backstabbing Rhett for him to betray you one last time?

He notices your thousand-yard stare nearly setting fire to all the grass in your vicinity. He warns you, calling your name in a way that says 'don't'.

"Those shitheads- Son of a bitch! I asked him…"

Rhett finally closes the distance, fingers kneading the knots on your shoulders as you huff, exasperated.

"Relax. This shows it has nothing do with you."

His hands massage your neck, thumbs caressing the ends of your jawline, and you close your eyes for a second.

"How so?"

"I'm assuming that's what you pulled him aside the other night to talk about. Play the game. Boost his ego, ensure I'm no threat, and he'd leave us alone. Because you're smart. If it was about you, they would have stopped. It didn't work, so it's unrelated to you, right? It's business. You don't understand, forget it."

You let him pull you in for a hug, stroking your hair while your arms envelop his body.

But then, it hits you. You don't understand. Maybe you made things worse by talking to him, maybe he told his brothers to punch harder, or didn't talk to them at all. Once again, you're proven to be out of your element. You wonder if she would have made this mistake. Or if she would have known the right way to handle this, them. Part of you roots for her.

You push him off.

"Or I wasn't convincing enough. Leaving can still make things better."

"Is that why you're going?"

"Rhett-" You're tired. Can't he just yell, grab your arm, tell you to never show up here again. That, you know how to thread. "It's not why, but it's a damn good reason."

He laughs at you, incredulous. Like he can't take you seriously. Like his brother, when he was drunk. It's a nauseating sight.

"Ok. So, what, you're bad for me? Get over yourself."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me." He's in your face again. "You really think that works on me? Is that how stupid you think I am? You’re bullshitting."

How is he controlling the situation? How did this happen?

"What do I do with that?"

"Tell the truth."

"I am!"

"Not that. Just two weeks ago. Prick's last night in town. You said to him, it didn't mean nothing. What didn't?"

"I didn't know you heard that."

"Well?"

"You and I. It didn't mean anything, soon enough I'd go back to Boston and you'd stay here."

"Did you lie to him, or to me?"

"I have a ticket back to Boston so-"

"Did it mean nothing to you?"

He's staring you down, breathing fast on your face, eyes searching yours for any signs of weakness.

It's right in front of him. The answer.

All these years valuing honesty, putting it on a pedestal, clinging to it as the one virtue you can count on… It made you a terrible liar.

He knows. You realize, then, that his point isn't to hear that you cared for him and that it wasn't all meaningless. Your leaky eyes, heaving chest, gritted teeth, it shows him that you do care.

He's asking you to speak up. To fight for yourself, instead of against. He probably doesn't mind you going back to school, he helped you, even. All he wants is to hear it.

Are you going to let go, tell him how much he means to you and that you'll be back for him? Or will you cower and run, leaving him behind?

You swallow an entire speech.

Rhett backs off, side-eyeing you one last time as he walks towards the steps, before turning to you. "In that case, you're probably right."

Then, Amelia interrupts your moment, running past her uncle and almost knocking him down in the process. You almost tumble yourself with the force of her hug.

It's crushing, and wet from her tears. You smooth her hair.

As fast as she came, she goes. Her weight is missed.

She takes her uncle's hand as she goes up the porch's steps, Perry watching from the doorway.

You fish for the truck's keys in your pocket, hearing the wooden door of the house shut behind you.

—————————

It's an even quieter than usual morning for the Abbotts.

The goddamn dogs look disinterested.

Amy woke up asking to skip school again, but his brother said no. She has spoons under her eyes to try and downsize the puffiness.

He didn't cry. Why would she?

Danielle called, he's not sure why, to say that you were gone. And to relay that you sent Amy a hello, wished her a good day in school.

Life is swift.

They'll be fine.

But he doesn't get it. At first, he thought he could save you from a poor excuse of a man. He had stolen girls from the boys next door before.

Eventually, the obvious dawned on him. They're not teenagers anymore.

You weren't nice to him to be saved, you were just nice. Yourself. Even if you hid, guarded up, dipped your toes in the water before diving. It was only fair. You decided he was good enough to let in.

And then he had screwed it up by fucking you in a strange place against a wall. Coming inside you with no regard for your well-being despite telling you he wanted to make you feel good. Instead, he probably ended up making you feel like another notch under his belt.

He was terrified. That he had lowered your expectations on people even more, convincing you to stay with your boyfriend because it doesn’t look too much better out there; that he had shown you his worst side and you'd never want to look at him again.

But you smiled, just a few days after. Teased him like he noticed you only did with him. Told him he had nothing to worry about, while you worried sick for him and his family. Didn't let him ease your nerves. A no-good, infuriating tendency to be self-righteous.

He knows- He knew you. What he doesn't understand is why you couldn't break those vices for him. What else could he have done to make you feel safe enough to?

You'd sacrifice yourself if it meant his family would be alright.

Did he not make it clear that he doesn't want you to? That, as long as you're gone, he will not be alright? And if he's not alright, he can't step up or whatever you said.

Then, there was all that talk about Maria. Obviously, the woman still affects him. They never got their chance, it's bound to make him wonder…

But even after all these years, he has no clue who she is. What she likes, what she hates. He knows her story by accidentally being part of it, and even then, he doesn't know it that well.

In a few months you managed to leak into every bit of his life. He memorized all of the pieces that built you, made the effort to. And he wanted more. He wanted you everywhere.

Everyone but his niece was skeptical. They liked you despite how vastly different you are, it scared them. For a family who has been through enough hardships, change is always uncomfortable. He spent nights awake thinking about how he could sprinkle a good word about you every dinner, maybe recruiting Amy, so that you'd feel loved by them too. They could love you, he's sure of it.

He doesn't understand why he's not enough. You must have noticed his effort. Sure, he wasn't too good with romance but he never gave up on you. It's not entitlement, you don't owe him anything, he chose you. Like you had said once, that you chose him. What changed?

Why was he not enough?

His mother is frustrated, to put it lightly, that now her two sons brood around the house, and so does her granddaughter. His dad spends even more time working to avoid the off-putting energy in the house.

So she suggests no one goes to Lenny's diner for a while. And that they all go watch him ride on Friday. Then they'll get some good chicken wings on the way home. Together (she means no bar after, no drinking).

They obey dilligently.

The show that night is good, he scores a great time. Maria is there. Not surrounded by blonde assholes, just her friends, he notices. Approachable.

They'll be fine.

————————

last part coming soon :)

#rhett abbott x reader #rhett abbott #outer range fanfic #outer range #lewis pullman

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multifandomimagines · 1 year

Text

All I Want for Christmas - A Steve Harrington Imagine

Characters: Steve Harrington x Reader

Word Count: 3410

Summary: The annual Christmas-themed Hawkins Middle School dance is fast approaching, but while they should be volunteering, Steve and the Reader spend their time with each other instead.

Warnings: Slight swearing, suggestive ending + angst - topics surrounding a previous breakup, as well as a mention of a bad relationship with parents.

Written by: Jasper

A/N: we’re back!!! we missed you guys SO much. i absolutely LOVED writing for steve and stranger things! our requests are always open, so if you love this as much as i loved writing it (as well as any of our other posts), please please please check out our requests post and send over your requests! merry christmas and happy holidays! <3

p.s. peep our new feature that we’ll sometimes be adding to our works! listen after or while you’re reading for the full experience 👀 ⤵️

Soundtrack: ‘Snow On The Beach’ by Taylor Swift ft. Lana Del Rey 🌨️

Disclaimer: GIF isn’t ours - credit to whoever it belongs to.

Snow Ball, 1984.

Given everything that happened a month ago, Y/N should have felt elated to go and help out at the school dance; to act like everything was okay just for a night, to feel normal again, but she surprisingly felt quite the opposite. She begged and pleaded, more than she ever had in her whole life, to just stay home, but her mother refused with a swift, “You’ll regret it when you’re older.”

“She’s making me go,” Y/N whispered over the phone, peering around the corner to make sure her mother wasn’t eavesdropping from the living room.

“I don’t know, Y/N,” Steve Harrington’s voice came through the ear speaker. Her and the once snobby rich boy formed an unusual bond after last month’s troubling events. Going through something as traumatic as that certainly ties you to someone for life, and she guessed that was what ultimately made them become the best of friends so quickly. They came to each other for everything since then, and she would be lying if she said that she hadn’t formed a crush on him that first night… But he was just out of a heart-wrenching breakup, so she (as hard as it may be) kept quiet as to not make him feel uncomfortable or ruin their budding friendship, which meant so much to her already. “I guess it could be kind of nice for you…”

“Jesus Christ, not you too—” she rolled her eyes, aggressively leaning into the wall.

“I’m just saying,” his voice was muffled through the phone, seemingly because he put it between his ear and shoulder. “you haven’t been the same since… everything…”

“Of course I haven’t, Steve… Who would?” Y/N answered, frustration and impatience apparent in her voice. He stayed quiet, prompting her to remember all the times he has acted as if nothing had ever even happened, “Well, not everyone can be Mr. Perfect Steve Harrington who-ignores-all-his-problems.”

“I think we’ve established that no one thinks I’m Mr. Perfect,” he chuckled insincerely, hinting at what had happened between him and Nancy Wheeler a month prior. The two had gone through a rather nasty breakup— the boy was devastated, seemingly never quite moving on. The girl, however, moving on not even a couple days later, contributing greatly to Steve’s heartbreak.

I do, Y/N so desperately wanted to say, but instead she kept quiet, an awkward silence falling over the two them.

“Okay, I’ll tell you what,” Steve said, cutting through the quiet tension. “I’m taking Dustin to the dance— why don’t I come around, pick you up too, you can make yourself look all pretty or whatever, and then you can sorta lie to your mom; act like you’re going to the dance, but in reality, you’re just hanging out with me.”

“Are you asking me to the dance, Harrington?” Y/N laughed, trying to make Steve flustered. “And did you just call me pretty?”

“Technically, I’m asking you to ditch the dance and hangout with me instead,” he replied, making no mention of the pretty comment.

After a moment of thinking, “Fine. But you have to stay in the car, I don’t need my parents asking you any weird questions— we all know you’re awful at lying.”

“Deal.”

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ

The night of the Snow Ball fast approached, and before Y/N knew it, the night had arrived. For hours beforehand, she had hastily gotten ready, trying to make herself look absolutely perfect. She wasn’t exactly certain why— sure, she had a crush on Steve and she would have made herself look nice for him anyways, but she wasn’t attending the dance, so was it really necessary to make herself so dance-ready? Picking out shoes that would be perfect for dancing, even picking out a flowy dress perfect for dancing?

“Y/N! Your date is here!” the girl’s mother called from the living room. “Is that really what he’s wearing to the dance?!”

“For the last time, Mom, he’s not technically my date…” Y/N answered, hurriedly rushing past her unbothered father sitting in his recliner, grabbing her bag off the coat hanger and opening the door. “Also it’s 1984, don’t judge other people’s attire. Bye, love you!”

“Is he not coming to meet us?—” was the last thing she heard before abruptly closing the door behind her, practically running to Steve’s car in the process.

She jumped in the backseat, “Step on it— Oh, hey, Dustin! I almost didn’t recognize you.”

The younger boy sat in the passenger, looking small in comparison to the older boy in the driver’s seat. His outfit was the epitome of the 1980s, puffy hair, bow tie and all. She wondered briefly if Steve had helped him get ready or if Dustin had done this all on his own. She looked over to Steve as Dustin greeted her, her attentiveness dying out instantly, no longer hearing a word the younger boy was saying.

Steve’s eyes were on her, and by the looks of it, they seemed to have been on her. The air between them suddenly felt on edge like never before— the way he looked at her made her heart hammer faster and faster against her ribcage; so loud that there was surely no way the other two couldn’t have heard it. His eyes sparkled in the dimming light as he took deep breaths, clearly mesmerized— well, until Dustin’s growing voice and finger snapping cut through the tension, “HELLO?! You two are going to make me late! Stare at each other later, it’s already getting dark!”

Steve pulled himself together first, slapping Dustin playfully on the arm, “We weren’t staring, smartass. OKAY, OKAY! I’m driving! Jesus Christ, you’re such a—”

But Y/N never really pulled herself together. The whole car ride to the dance was a blur, she didn’t even truly hear what the other two were saying. All she could focus on was the memory of his eyes on her, the look on his face, and the way she absolutely melted underneath his gaze. She was oddly quiet the rest of the ride, and Steve noticed— his eyes frequently shifting to the rearview mirror above him to glimpse back at her.

Quickly, she realized that the Hawkins Middle School building was emerging ahead of them; street lights and traffic finally snapping her out of her trance. Sitting up straight and leaning forward, she rested her forearms on the center console as Steve pulled the car around front, directly adjacent of the entrance doors. People streamed into the building in mostly pairs, all dressed head to toe in formal attire.

“All right, buddy, here we are…” Steve’s voice cut through the silence. Both him and Dustin looked to the doors, Dustin’s lingering on them a bit longer than Steve’s. “So, remember, once you get in there…”

Dustin looked back to Steve, nervousness somewhat apparent on his face. “Pretend like I don’t care.”

“You don’t care,”

“I don’t care.”

“There you go. You’re learning, my friend. You’re learning.”

“Oh, Jesus Christ— are you actually teaching him that?!” Y/N scoffed in disbelief, interrupting the other two’s somewhat heartfelt conversation, laughter choking out from her throat.

“What do you know?” Steve replied, turning around in his seat to directly look at her for the first time since the start of the journey. His brazen gaze softened the moment his eyes landed on hers.

“I know that acting like you don’t care makes you look like an asshole—”

Dustin reached for the rearview mirror as the older two playfully argued (which was such a common occurrence at this point, to which everyone else just simply ignored) and snapping it rather hastily in his direction.

Steve looked back at the sudden noise, “Hey—”

“What?” Dustin replied, still glancing anxiously at himself in the mirror above him.

Steve grabbed the mirror from Dustin, pulling it back into his direction, “Come on, you look great, okay? You look— you look great.”

Dustin assured Steve that he was hearing what he was saying, but it seemed more like assurance to himself than anyone else. He more or less looked like he was about to cry— he looked frightened, almost as if he wished he could just stay in the car forever and never have to step foot through those daunting doors.

“Dustin, take it from a girl, okay?” Y/N said, reassuring the terrified younger boy. Steve smiled to himself. “You genuinely look amazing. How about you save me a dance for when we pick you up later, yeah?”

Dustin nodded, signifying he was listening despite him looking to the floor.

“Okay, you’re gonna go in there…” Steve said.

“Yeah…”

“Look like a million bucks—”

“Yeah,”

“And you’re gonna slay ‘em dead.”

“Like a lion,” Dustin replied, a newfound confidence in his voice. Suddenly, his mouth opened and a purring noise came out, issuing both Y/N and Steve to nervously glance at each other.

“Yeah… don’t do that, okay?” Steve said as Dustin stared back at him, doe-eyed.

“Okay,”

Steve reached out a loving hand to him, “Good luck.”

Dustin took it, a slight smile on his face. He nodded, turned, then exited the car. Both Steve and Y/N watched as Dustin walked into the building hesitantly, but more confidently as he started to speak to someone that Y/N couldn’t see. Then, awkward silence washed over them as they both watched through the doors, neither of them saying a single word to another.

She looked to Steve out of her peripheral, realizing that he had spotted something, a relatively distressed look apparent on his face, unalike the smile he had merely moments before.

“Steve?” she said gently, worrying what she would see if she put herself at his level. “You okay?”

After he didn’t answer, she leaned forward, eyes instantly falling on Nancy Wheeler. She looked absolutely beautiful, talking and laughing with attendees as they came to her for a cup of punch. Steve visibly didn’t know that Nancy was volunteering tonight— the thought of going from knowing everything about someone, to knowing nothing, appeared to hurt him greatly. She was happy, which must have pained Steve even more— he hadn’t seemed genuinely happy himself in so long. But knowing Steve, Y/N knew that it was bittersweet to him— he was happy that Nancy was happy, and to him, that’s all that really, truly mattered.

Turning away, hiding the pang of jealousy and hurt that she felt by this, Y/N acted as if she hadn’t seen what he was looking at. Instead, she hopped up into the passenger seat next to him, minding her dress, and looked over at him. She was now unknowingly blocking his view of Nancy, yet he didn’t really mind it. Honestly… he grew to like it better this way.

Y/N was always there for him; she was there through the thick of last month, saving his ass that night more than he cared to admit. She was there through the aftermath of the breakup; all the times he tried to hide his tears from her in fear that she would make fun of him, yet she never did. She’d even let him stay over on nights that his parents made him so furious he couldn’t even be in the same house as them. She was there through it all, yet Nancy hardly did the same. Y/N was better for him, and he was finally starting to realize it.

“You okay?” the girl asked again sincerely, her eyes glistening in the low light as she watched him closely.

The boy exhaled and looked away, shook his head, more so to himself than her, and shifted his gear from parked to driving, “For the first time in awhile, I’m okay.”

He drove around the side of the school and parked. The parking lot was now deserted of other people despite the amount of vehicles that resided in spots, their owners clearly dancing the night away inside the building, abandoned until hours later.

The two of them exited the car, walking around and taking a seat on the back. That seemed to be one of the things they did these days; parking off somewhere and sitting on the hood or trunk and having deep conversations. Y/N cherished those perfect moments, she was sure she cherished them a bit more than Steve did considering her feelings, but nonetheless, she was sure he adored them too, even if not the same way she did.

“You sure you’re okay? You looked pretty… blindsided back there—” Y/N hesitantly said, shifting her position to look at him. She feared he would be upset with her for bringing it up again. She braced for a sarcastic remark… but none ever came.

He looked back up, his dark hair falling over his forehead in pieces. He looked so innocently back at her, no sign of hurt or annoyance at her question. His voice was gentle, “More than okay.”

She chuckled, “Well, that’s a start. Why the change of heart?”

“You, actually.” He replied, his voice soft, unlike she’s ever heard it before. “It’s always been you.”

Her breathing shallowed, her heart beginning to palpitate. Was he meaning what she thought he was? Or was she simply looking too far into it? “I don’t understand—”

“You know,” he begin. “I can’t remember the last time Nancy asked me if I was okay, or simply cared if I was, if I’m being honest.”

Y/N simply sat and listened, not daring to say a single word or make him lose his train of thought.

“It was always me asking her if she was okay, always only caring about her and her well-being. I lost sight of myself and how I was doing, all just to make her happy… but I never got it in return.” he continued, looking out at the empty parking lot, remembering memories that he was trying so hard the past few weeks to forget. “I mean, I don’t blame her. She’s always had her own shit going on. I don’t know— I guess what I’m trying to say is… it’s been nice having someone care about me for once. You know, ask how I’m doing and all that shit. Maybe all this time I’ve just been focusing on someone who never really wanted me in the first place, while someone who’s been there for me since day one was getting the short end of the stick.”

“Steve—” Y/N began to say, the words dying out in her throat. Her comforting hand came to rest atop his beside them, their fingers slightly intertwining. Her eyes scanned his face, looking for any sign of hesitation or regret. Yet, there was none…

“You’re beautiful,” Steve spoke delicately, looking up from their embracing hands to meet her gaze. “I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it.”

“We still have time.” she smiled, squeezing his hand a bit tighter. She dreamt of this moment for so long, yet when it finally came, she felt as if she couldn’t speak properly; all the words she imagined saying to him died out in her throat the moment it was finally happening. It wasn’t just a dream this time— it was real life.

“I’m sorry— Jesus Christ, I haven’t even asked how you feel—” he backtracked, shaking his head, frustrated with himself. “I just assumed—”

“Are you kidding, Steve?” Y/N replied as he looked to her nervously. “It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

He smiled, relief washing over his face in waves. This was atypical for Steve Harrington— not only the anxiousness he exuded in those few moments, but also the way he poured his entire heart out. Y/N was sure he must have done it with Nancy; he’d even done it with other topics to Y/N, but never in this way. Never so vulnerable— she figured that was the perfect word to describe it: Vulnerable.

Steve had changed so much over the past month. He was broken and bruised (even quite literally at one point), so much that it changed him. He was worried that Y/N didn’t feel the same— he had always just assumed Nancy did, but that didn’t turn out well for him now, did it? No, he needed to be absolutely sure this time.

“Y/N, are you sure?” Steve asked, glancing back at her hand atop his. “I can’t go through it again…”

Her lips met his, gently but urgently, washing away all of the doubts and insecurities swirling around in his head. In that moment, he forgot about Nancy wholeheartedly, forgot about every bad thing that had ever happened to him, even forgetting how him and Y/N got to this point. The only thing that mattered was the destination; her lips were soft moving against his, her hands caressing his skin in innocent places that she’d never touched him before.

Steve’s fingers came up to lace through her hair delicately, pulling her closer than ever. He ached to feel her nearer to him, to embrace her wholly, after so long of not knowing what that felt like.

He pulled away first, cold air replacing the heat of where his lips were mere seconds previously. Her senses on high alert, Y/N realized the music from inside the building could be faintly heard, interrupting the quiet of the dark, abandoned lot. Every Breath You Take was vaguely audible, the vibe of the dance changing drastically. She imagined the dance attendees slow dancing with another, taking the opportunity to kiss and be close to each other.

Steve jumped off the back of the car, held out a hand to her and said, “You didn’t think I’d let you come to a dance without making you dance with me, did you?”

She chuckled, smiling to herself, happiness overtaking her for the first time in awhile, “Not letting Dustin get the first dance with me, huh?”

“Never in a million years,” Steve joked. “you’re mine now.”

“I could get used to that…” Y/N flirted, taking his outstretched hand in hers.

The two found themselves embracing, slow dancing, spinning, playfully joking, until it got comfortably quiet between them. They basked in each other’s presence, feeling happier than they’ve felt in a long while. It was hard to imagine this any other way— it felt as if it had been this way between them forever.

She rested her head atop his shoulder, pulling him close and wrapping her arms around him. They both shut their eyes, the comfortable silence giving way to the song faintly coming to an end inside of the school. The moment felt bittersweet— both of them wishing it could last forever.

After a long pause, Y/N opened her eyes first, noticing that the scenery had slightly changed around them. A thin white sheet covered the ground and the cars residing in their respective spots, white flakes falling gently out of the sky.

“Steve—” she spoke, lightly backing out from his embrace. She glanced around them, “It’s snowing.”

He opened his eyes, both of them immediately landing on her, not bothering to even look out at the snow. As cheesy as it sounded in his head, she was more beautiful than anything nature could possibly do, and he didn’t want to miss her most of all.

He tucked a snow covered strand of hair out of her face, making her look to him. A smile formed on her mouth as his lips met hers for a second time, snow falling all around them like minuscule, twinkling stars.

“Hey…” Steve whispered, lips resting against Y/N’s. “How about we go back to my place? Pick Dustin up in a couple hours, yeah?”

“Mhm,” she replied, grinning, finally opening her eyes to meet his once again. “hey, wait— what happened to acting like you don’t care?”

Steve, remembering the advice he had just given Dustin less than a half an hour before, snickered, “Yeah, well, that was minutes ago— I’m a changed man now.”

She laughed, making a face at him as they got back into his car. They drove off to his house as Christmas music played vaguely over the radio, hands tenderly held near the stick shift, stealing glances at each other on well-lit streets.

As it turned out, her mother had been right in someway all along; Y/N would have regretted this night for the rest of her life if she hadn’t gone. As much as she hated to admit it, school dances, or lack thereof, turned out to not be so bad after all.

#stranger things #steve harrington #steve imagine #steve harrington imagine #stranger things imagine #christmas imagine #christmas imagines #stranger things christmas imagine #steve harrington christmas #steve harrington christmas imagine #requests open #steve harrington snow ball #stranger things christmas #steve harrington x fem #steve harrington x reader #joe keery

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irrelevantwriter · 2 years

Text

In This World And Beyond

Pairing: Eddie Munson (Stranger Things) x Female Reader/You

Rating: SFW

Warnings: Spoilers for Vol. 2, language, heavy angst, mention of character death, grief (im sorry)

Word Count: 1169

Summary: Those who were with Eddie on his last days come to see you. You have some things to say.

A/N: I said i wasn't going to acknowledge Eddie’s end, but here I am. Posting this sad shit. But it felt cathartic at the same time so hopefully I banished that shit out bc this will always be an Eddie is alive truther blog. I also have a fluffy companion piece to this that I’ll post to make up for whatever heartbreaking shit this is. Feedback is that good shit.💗

Disclaimer: As always, reader inserts are true reader inserts. If you find any specifics in regards to reader’s appearance, kindly let me know and I will fix that.

*Check out my other Eddie fics here

*Read the fluffy companion piece here

***********************

The breeze picked up around you. You shivered, but didn’t move. You ignored the looks. Ignored the whispered words and judging gazes. You stayed rooted to your spot. Tears streaking your face every few minutes.

A pack of footsteps and whispers pulled your attention momentarily. You could hear a voice that you recognized. He was debating on approaching you.

“She doesn’t look like she wants to be bothered, Henderson.”

“She’s grieving, asshole.”

The words came to a halt, so did the footsteps, when you looked up and met their eyes.

It’s the group.

The people who were with Eddie when he died. The people you both blamed and appreciated for Eddie’s last few days on earth. You had mixed feelings about seeing them. They were brave for approaching you. You could see the fear in their eyes.

Steve. Robin. Nancy. Dustin.

“H-hey…we just wanted to check in. See how you were doing,” Dustin said, sorrow coloring his words.

You knew what Eddie meant to him.

He’d meant a lot to you too.

You didn’t respond to him.

“We’re really sorry about what happened. Eddie was…a great guy.”

Tears began to run down your cheeks as you cut your eyes away from Steve Harrington and back out to the woods that lined Eddie’s trailer park.

Again, you said nothing.

A few more whispers were exchanged. You could faintly hear Steve trying to convince Dustin to let you be. The kid refused.

They continued to bicker until you finally broke your silence.

“Did you know Eddie had a cat?” Your voice was painfully hoarse, and it cracked with your words.

You didn’t look at them but you could tell you had their attention. So you went on.

“Yeah, he came to my house one day. I don’t know if I’d seen him that excited before,” you sniffled, getting lost in the memory. “He had the thing bundled in his jacket. All matted and dirty. It was skin and bones. And hissing like crazy.” You smiled wistfully as you conjured up his face in your mind.

Trees rustled as another breeze swept through, trying and failing to dry your tears. There were always more.

“Eddie’s hands had scratches all over. But he was like a kid on Christmas. Excited to show me. And I was convinced the thing had rabies,” you laughed, the sound watery and broken. “But he said it just needed some Eddie Munson TLC.”

Your gaze caught a rabbit in the distance. It stood still as it sniffed the air. After only a second it darted off, as if sensing the danger that lingered here. The death.

“So that’s what he did. He gave it a bath and fed it. Nursed it back to health. And it became his shadow.”

Somewhere, you could hear shuffling.

“He named it Munster.”

A sob wracked you suddenly. It was powerful and all-consuming. You had no control as tears poured from your eyes and your chest physically ached with pain. It felt like he’d taken your heart with him when he’d gone. Like he’d ripped it from your chest at the same moment his stopped beating. As if you’d taken your last full breaths with his. You’d never know peace again.

You could feel their uncomfortable gazes on you. Watching a broken woman fall into smaller pieces. Dustin hovered close by, as if waiting to swoop in and comfort you.

You regained some semblance of control and looked to the sky, willing it to open up and swallow you.

“That’s the man they labeled a killer. That’s the man they hunted,” you rasped, eyes darting to the group.

Emotion filled your voice. Anger. Rage. It all simmered for a town and its people who never cared about him. Never cared what became of him. They just wanted him gone. And they got their wish.

“They’ll never know the Eddie I knew. They’ll never know how truly amazing he was. How they pushed him. They pushed him and made him believe he was less than. A coward. When he was one of the bravest people I’d ever know.”

Dustin’s eyes filled with tears. Steve swallowed and looked at the ground. Robin sniffled. Nancy stared at you, sympathy in her large eyes.

“They killed him. They killed him and I’ll never forgive any of them.”

You shook your head and squeezed your eyes shut, willing for the millionth time that you’d wake up from this nightmare.

But nothing happened.

“He saved our lives. He’s a hero,” Dustin whispered.

You nodded, wiping at your swollen eyes. “He sacrificed his life for a town that wanted him dead. He sacrificed for you.” You stared poignantly at each of them. “And I hope you never forget that. Because he didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve to go out that way. And you didn’t deserve to have him go out that way.”

A calm vitriol laced your words, but you could see the effect it had on the group. They each had the decency to look remorseful.

Steve opened his mouth to say something, but you turned away.

“Thanks for stopping by,” you cut in, effectively shutting the conversation down.

You waited as they each turned and walked in the opposite direction, Dustin lagging behind.

“Dustin!”

He turned abruptly at your voice and made his way back over, Steve lingering in the distance.

“Thank you. For all that you did for him. Up until the end. He loved you. So much.”

Dustin’s tears were free flowing as he nodded, wiping at his eyes and looking every bit of the child he still was. He dug in his pocket and produced Eddie’s pick necklace, the sight of it making your heart seize.

“Here.”

He held it out to you. You took it with shaking hands, feeling the weight of it. It felt so different without being attached to him. It felt wrong.

“You keep it.” You shoved it back at him. “I’ve got plenty of Eddie to keep me company,” you gestured to the abandoned trailer where all his things still waited for you.

Dustin silently nodded and put the necklace back into his pocket. “He was metal up until the very end,” he said softly, meeting your clouded vision.

More tears fell as you laughed. “I bet.”

“And he told me to…,” he struggled to continue, voice choking up. “To tell you that he loved you. In this world and beyond.”

You closed your eyes, hearing Eddie say those words a thousand times before. When you were half asleep in his bed. When you listened to him talk about his D&D campaign. When you both sang along to the radio in his van. When you sat in the audience at his band’s shows. When you threw fries at his mouth, laughing when he missed over every shot.

Memories flooded you. And then the sky opened up and rain began to fall.

Dustin left you there.

You stayed there for hours. Feeling the rain. Letting it soak you.

“Goodbye Eddie.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson fanfic #stranger things

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horanghaejamjam · 2 years

Text

Calico: Chapter 4

Story Summary: Now that he is a successful business owner and financially stable,Yoongi felt it was finally time to welcome a hybrid into his home. What he didn’t expect, was a chance meeting with the young calico that would steal his heart.

Chapter Summary: After Mika expresses her loneliness, Yoongi decides to start bringing her to work.

Pairing: CEO Yoongi x Calico hybrid OC.

Mentioned Pairings: Hinted potential Bunny hybrid Jungkook x Calico OC. Jin x Wolf hybrid Namjoon. Taehyung x Cat Hybrid Jimin

Rating: PG

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 3.5k

Warnings: None

Disclaimer: Images used in header are not mine. All written work is 100% my own, editors and beta readers will be credited as needed. Do not copy, translate, or repost my work onto other sites without my permission.

Previous Chapter . . . Next Chapter

Calico Masterlist

The others visiting became a much more common occurrence now. Not that Yoongi minded too much, just happy everyone was getting along, but he still enjoyed the peace of being alone in his own home. With the exception of the super playful cat girl that lived with him. The more comfortable Mika got living with him, the more hyper she got as well. Always curious, always getting into trouble, and always wanting Yoongi’s attention.

“Yoongi!” speak of the devil, the calico was now pulling at his sleeve while he was working on his computer.

“Yes Kitten?” he asked, not tearing his eyes away from the screen.

“Play with me!” she whined as she tugged harder on his sleeve. It took everything in Yoongi’s power not to smile at her antics, opting to gently nudge her off instead.

“I’m busy Mika, we can play later,” he said. Clearly, she didn’t like this, as he heard a huff before feeling her move off the couch. Looking up from his computer, he couldn’t help but smile a bit as she pouted up at him from her new position on the floor. “Now what is that look for?” he asked.

“You’re always busy!” Mika whined, “you never spend time with me!”

“I have to work Mika, this house doesn’t pay for itself after all.”

“But you work all week,” she pointed out, “I never get to see you and when you’re here you work too. Why don’t you want to spend time with me?” Yoongi frowned a bit when he heard this. It’s not like he meant to ignore her, it’s just that work was really dragging him along recently. Then again, that wasn’t something he expected the young hybrid to understand when she was still so unfamiliar with how the world worked. From her perspective, it just felt like he was leaving her alone all day.

“I’ll tell you what,” he said, leaning forward a bit to scratch behind her ears, “give me another hour or two to finish what I’m doing, and then we’ll go out for dinner and ice cream, sound good?” Mika immediately perked up at the mention of the frozen dessert and nodded.

“Promise?” she asked.

“I promise,” Yoongi assured, messing up her hair a bit before returning to his work while Mika busied herself with one of her scratching posts. If it weren’t for specific incidents where she showed off how smart she was, Yoongi would have assumed she was more cat than human.

True to their word, she left him alone long enough to finish his work, eventually tiring herself out and falling asleep in her sunbathing spot. It was a spot under the windows that she had fitted with a few blankets and pillows because, “The floor is too hard and there’s not enough sun in my room.” Turning off his laptop, Yoongi smiled as he watched her for a moment, admiring how peaceful she looked before standing up and going to get changed so they could go out. Instead of hanging his full outfit, he replaced his sweatshirt with a fitted black turtleneck and brushed his blonde bangs out of his face. After deciding not to freshen up with makeup he made his way back to the living room and over to the sleeping Calico. As gently as possible, he kneeled down and shook her awake.

“Mika,” he whispered, “it’s time to go.” Mika groaned a bit before her eyes fluttered open, looking up at him for a minute as she fully woke up. Yoongi chuckled a bit and brushed her hair from her eyes, “Why don’t you go fix your hair real quick so we can go?” Another tired groan was her response before she nodded and sat up, taking a moment to stretch as she made her way to the bathroom. Chances were, she wasn’t going to change as he did, but she was still presentable enough to go out so Yoongi didn’t mind too much. Wearing dark leggings and an oversized sweater (that was actually his), combined with her small size, she actually looked pretty cute.

The place that Yoongi settled on was a small café that was only a block away from his company building. He had gone there once for his lunch break and, while not usually his style, the food there was actually pretty good. Given that this was only Mikas’ second time leaving the house with him, he didn’t want to overwhelm her by going somewhere that would be crowded. Not to mention he didn’t feel like dressing up and going through the hassle of eating somewhere more high-end either, and some of those places were still very sensitive about hybrids. So, all things considered, this place was a win-win. Mika couldn’t help but look around as they exited the car, her owner having to grab onto her wrist to make sure that she didn’t wander off and get lost.

Thankfully they arrived just before the usual dinner rush so they were seated almost immediately. Yoongi thanked the host with a small bow and glanced down at the menu while Mika opted for staring out the window. If this is how she reacted every time they went out, then he may have to start bringing her with him more when she got her better collar. He was already in the discussion of getting one made with a friend of his after observing the cat long enough to find her preferences. Honestly, neither of them were really much for conversation so he had learned most of what he knew about her either from observation, information Hoseok received and relayed to him, or passing comments Mika had made on her own. It wasn’t much, but given how long they had been living together, it was good enough.

Other than her personality, he knew a bunch of small facts about the hybrid. She was born in Japan and brought to Korea by her new owner. She was part of a litter of two but was separated from her brother when she was adopted. She is very sensitive to the cold, she loves music, and, most importantly, he found out that she has a major allergy to apples. Thankfully the last one he found out from Hoseok and not by accidentally feeding her the dreaded fruit. Yoongi was protective enough over the female as is, so her being hurt because of him would have devastated him.

“Mika,” he called out softly, snapping the calicos’ attention back to him, “you need to tell me what you want so we can eat. You can stare out the window afterward.” Mika hummed a bit as she turned to sit down properly. “Do you know what you want?” Yoongi asked after another few minutes, to which Mika pouted and shook her head. He hummed and leaned forward so that they were looking at the menu together. “Well, what do you like?” he asked, getting the exact same response as the first question.

“I don’t know,” Mika whined, “what can I have?”

“Whatever you want,” Yoongi replied with an assuring smile. Realizing very quickly that they were getting nowhere, he decided to help with a few more questions. “You like meat right?” she nodded, and action that he copied, “any specific type of meat?” She shook her head which caused him to frown a bit. “You also like vegetables right?” when she nodded again he sighed, “I need you to speak up kitten.”

“Yes,” she replied shyly, which made Yoongi smile.

“Do you prefer white or fried rice?”

“I’ve only ever had white rice.”

“Are you okay with spicy?”

“Yes.”

“Do you like noodles?”

“Depends on what they’re made with.” Well, at least they were getting somewhere, but it still wasn’t narrowed down enough. Looking at the menu again, Yoongi finally came up with an idea and nodded to himself.

“How about this,” he offered, “I’ll share my food with you and also get a few different side dishes for you to try and see what you like. Does that sound good?” Mika seemed a bit unsure but agreed anyways to avoid wasting more time.

The side dish idea actually worked out pretty well. The two of them managed to clean off most of the plates and Mika seemed satisfied with the food. Though choosing ice cream was definitely a lot easier for the Calico, who knew what she wanted before they had even entered the parlor. Yoongi hadn’t been in much of a mood for the cold treat, but he still got a milkshake for himself so that Mika wouldn’t feel guilty being the only one with ice cream. Once again she seemed fascinated with the outside world, with Yoongi having to guide her attention back to the table a few times before she fell out of her chair trying to see out into the street. There was a park nearby as well, if he remembered correctly, perhaps he could take Mika there as well. Not tonight though since he still had more work to do when they got home. Not that the female was very happy about this as she began to pout on the way back home.

“Why do you have to do more work?” she whined.

“Don’t give me that look,” Yoongi pouted back at her, “we went out and had fun so now I have to finish my job.” Mika wanted to say something but decided against it, huffing a bit as she stared out the window. Yoongi would probably have to sit down and talk with her about it all in more depth later, but he didn’t want to ruin the fun night they had now.

It was only later that night when Yoongi actually thought over Mika’s complaints. He was sat in bed on the phone with Jin, his hybrid companion having already fallen asleep an hour prior.

“She’s got a point you know,” Jin said, “you dedicate your whole life to your job.”

“Should I not? My family worked hard to get the company where it is today,” Yoongi argued. On the other end, he could hear the older sigh.

“I’m not saying you shouldn’t care about your job Yoongi. In fact, I’m the last person that would tell you that. What I am saying is that you need to think about how she sees it. You work from sunrise to sunset every weekday, and then when the weekend comes, your days off, you bring work home with you. What else is she supposed to think?” This time it was Yoongis turn to sigh, running his fingers through his hair.

“What am I supposed to do?” he asked, “it’s not like I can just abandon my work because my hybrid needs my attention.” A few moments of silence passed between them, Yoongi was about to end the call before Jin finally spoke up again.

“Why don’t you just bring her to work with you?” it sounded like the most obvious solution in the world when his Hyung said it, and yet Yoongi hadn’t even considered it. “Your office is large enough to fit a crowd, just set up a corner for her to relax and there, problem solved! You get your work done and Mika gets to spend time with you.” Yoongi hummed a bit, thankful that Jin couldn’t see his current expression.

“Something tells me letting a curious cat girl loose in the office isn’t the best idea,” he argued, to which his friend scoffed.

“You let Jungkook and Jimin in the office, there is no way she is worse than they are,” he pointed out, “besides, if she gets bored she can just go hang out with them!”

“Because Tae definitely needs more distractions,” Yoongi muttered under his breath. Thankfully Jin didn’t hear that so he cleared his throat, “I’ll think about it. I should probably go to bed though before I stay awake all night again, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight Yoongi,” with that the line went dead, again leaving Yoongi alone with his thoughts. It didn’t seem like he would be getting sleep tonight anyways.

Yoongi literally considered the option of bringing Mika with him up until the moment he was putting his shoes on and walking out the door, yet he still didn’t know if he made the right choice. Walking through the neatly laid out office building, he got quite a few stares from his workers. Partially because he was their boss so his presence alone demanded attention, but also because of the shy cat that was pressed against him as they walked. A few workers clearly tried to get closer to the hybrid since they had never seen her before but Yoongi was making it hard. Calmly shooing people away that tried to get too close and answering any questions directed at Mika.

Yoongis office, along with the rest of his higher-up staff, was located on the top floor of the building. It was a bit more open with offices and meeting rooms on either side, some with all windows and others that were closed off. There was also a mini breakroom in the middle of the floor and a reception desk at the front. There was a similar one on the first floor as well, but given this was where the higherups worked you usually needed an appointment to get up here. Mika also took note of the fact that there were significantly fewer people than on the lower floor, which made her a bit more comfortable. Yoongis office was at the very end and clearly the biggest. A shiny plate with the name “Mr. Min” etched beside the locked door separating them from the room. The interior was just as nice, an open room with floor-to-wall windows that allowed the sun to illuminate the room and a beautiful view of the city. Blackout curtains rested on either side for when Yoongi found the light to be too much. Multiple shelves and cabinets lined the walls, some containing books, pictures, and certificates Yoongi had received over the years. His desk stood proudly in the middle, the dark wood a stark contrast to the bright room with a large office chair resting behind it and two smaller chairs in front. In the corner was a small couch, that would probably become Mika’s area if she liked coming to work with him. After the addition of a few more blankets and toys of course.

“Now,” he said as he unlocked and opened the door to his office, stepping aside and allowing her to walk in first, “you are going to have to behave while I work and either stay in here or with Tae or Jin. Jin’s office is the one next to mine and Taes is right at the end of the hall. If you need to go anywhere else please let someone know so you don’t end up lost in this giant building okay?” Mika tilted her head a bit as she looked up at him before nodding. Yoongi smiled softly and ran a hand through her hair, “Good girl, let me know if you need anything.” He made his way to his desk as she got herself comfortable on the couch, stretching out and yawning softly. Yoongi had woken her up rather abruptly so she was probably going to end up falling back asleep in a few moments.

His suspicions were proven true when he looked over and saw her snuggled into the corner fast asleep, hugging herself with her legs pressed against her body. Not wanting her to get cold, Yoongi grabbed the blanket he brought and draped it over her softly before returning to his desk. The pile of documents in the corner demanded his attention and it would only get bigger as the day went on. Mostly contracts and signing off on new plans, so Yoongi managed to get through a lot of them within the first few hours of the day, occasionally looking over to make sure that Mika was okay. Other than opening her eyes for a moment or two or shifting around she remained asleep. That was until a knock at his office door startled her awake and almost made her fall off the couch. Yoongi gave her an apologetic glance before returning his attention to the door and calling out, “Come in.”

Mika watched quietly as the door opened and a woman walked in, dressed up in a pantsuit that matched what Yoongi was wearing. The hybrid couldn’t help but look down at her own outfit a bit and feel out of place. She didn’t have anything fancy to wear like the people that worked here. “Good morning Mr. Min,” she greeted with a soft bow, Yoongi nodding softly and motioning for her to take a seat.

“Good morning Jieun,” he greeted back. The two proceeded to start talking about some business plan that Mika couldn’t even remotely understand. Still, she listened in as if she did, wanting to feel like she was a part of the conversation. From what she had gathered, they were discussing a schedule change and an upcoming meeting he had with someone named…Kim? In all honesty, she stopped paying attention after that, deciding that the birds flying right outside the window were more interesting. It was then that the other two in the room were reminded of her presence. “Oh right,” Yoongi said, “Jieun, this is my new kitten, Mika. Mika, this is Jieun, my assistant, you’ll probably be seeing her a lot.”

Mika turned to look at the woman in question, giving her a soft, “Hello.”

“Nice to meet you, Mika,” Jieun greeted with a soft smile, “hopefully we can be friends.” She bowed her head slightly but Mika didn’t make an effort to move or say anything which caused the older woman to frown.

“She’s shy,” Yoongi explained, “give her time and she’ll warm up to you.” Jieun nodded before glancing at the clock.

“Well I should return to my desk, you should receive that email by the end of the day.” Yoongi nodded and stood up to see her out. As he did so, Mika decided to get up as well and make herself comfortable in his office chair. A soft giggle echoed through the room as she spun around a bit, only to be stopped by Yoongi.

“Excuse me miss, but that’s my chair,” he mused with a playful chuckle.

“I like your chair,” Mika exclaimed, “it’s big and it feels like you.”

“The couch is bigger Mika, surely that must be more comfortable,” Yoongi argued as he grabbed her wrist and gently pulled her up. The second he sat down though, the calico had placed herself in his lap with her head on his shoulder. “Kitten, off,” he warned. The compromising position and the fact that anyone could walk in had heat rising to his cheeks at an alarming rate. If Mika noticed though, she didn’t care as she nuzzled into him.

“But why?” she whined, “I wanna cuddle.”

“We don’t cuddle in public Mika,” he scolded lightly, pushing her enough so she was looking at him, “I have to work and it’s not professional to be affectionate like this.” As gentle as he tried to be, she still got upset. Ears dropping to rest against her head and her lips forming that all too familiar pout. Yoongi sighed and looked around frantically for a bit before getting an idea, “You know what? Jungkook is here, why don’t you go spend time with him while I work? I’m sure he’ll be more than happy to cuddle with you.” He let out a sigh of relief when she perked up, slowly maneuvering her off of his lap and walking her to the door. “Like I said, Taes office is right at the end there. Do you see it?” he pointed to it as he spoke and waited for her to nod before moving away, “I’ll come get you when it’s time to go okay?”

“Can we cuddle when we get home?” she asked, causing him to wince a bit.

“Sure,” that answer seemed good enough as Mika quickly made her way down the hall and to Taehyung’s office. Yoongi stayed at the door to make sure she got there okay before closing it and returning to his desk. Seeing his reflection in his laptop screen, he realized how much he was blushing and quickly hid his head in his hands. He would definitely need to have a talk with Mika about boundaries later, at least when they were in public. Even if he tried to deny it, Yoongi really did enjoy the attention when they were alone or with friends. “Ugh,” he muttered to himself, “what is this girl doing to me?”

Taglist: None (To be added to Calicos taglist comment or message me)

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eddiemunsonw · 1 year

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It takes one kiss

CHAPTER 4 - To hell with it

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5

Steddie Fanfic

Summary: Steve hosts a party and ends up suffering through the consequences of humoring Tommy.

Steve Harrington kisses Eddie Munson by accident and that sucked. Right?

CW / Disclaimer: Some mild overlap with S4 scenes (barely) - But (!!) Eddie lives - Mention of F-slur once.

Author’s note: My first Steddie fic! Another first woop. Let's hope you like. It has five parts that I'll be posting both on here and on my ao3: eddiemunsons. Enjoy!

Words: (of current chapter) 1817 / (complete fic) 15381

Eddie’s POV

Ah… shit. This hadn’t really been the plan. Not all of it, at least. Yes, he meant to distract the bats. Yes, he had been ready to die. No, he had not wanted Dustin to get back in and watch him die. That part really fucking sucked.

“Eddie… c’mon, you can’t do this, you’re okay.”

“Do… Do I look okay, Henderson? This is a natural one in real life, bud.”

“No! Don’t say that, you’re f-fine,” Dustin sniffed. Eddie forced a smile on his face.

“Alright, I’m fine,” he lied. “Gonna kick your ass in the next campaign. Vecna was child’s play. Just you wait.”

The weakest of smiles formed on Dustin’s tear-streaked face and he nodded.

“Yeah, right. As if. My character is gonna be the biggest tank you’ve ever witnessed. Can destroy everything with his pinky. Promise you that.”

“Your clever mind was always the most challenging thing to work around, I’ll give ya that.”

“Is. It still is,” Dustin protested weakly.

“Right, right.” He didn’t mean to, but the pain was becoming so unbearable that his vision started to swim. He didn’t want to cry. Not in front of Dustin.

“Dustin! Dustin!”

Yeah, that guy, Eddie thought, lightheadedness seeping in.

“DUSTIN! Wh— Eddie?”

He couldn’t hear the conversation, the muffled voices sounded like they were underwater. Or maybe he was. Or maybe they both were and everyone was sinking… sinking…

Slap!

Eddie blinked slowly, barely able to feel the soaring pain in his cheek, which his brain would have registered had this little signal of pain not been largely outnumbered by the fact that he was dying from things that hurt a lot more than a flat hand against his cheek.

“Eddie, don’t fucking do this to me, stay with me! Come on, man!”

Hold on… He knew that voice. It wasn’t Dustin, whose voice sounded far away and seemed to be mixed with a female one. Robin? Nancy? Maybe both? He had no idea. All he could really pay attention to right now were Steve Harrington’s big, beautiful, worried eyes.

“Steeeeve Harrington,” Eddie croaked out, a lopsided smile on his face. “It’s your lucky day, it seems.” He didn’t know where he had found the strength to speak again but he was. Steve was frowning. Steve. Not Harrington. Just Steve, because the rest was too long to think about and it didn’t matter.

“Why is that?” Steve asked softly. His arms were comfortable. The way he easily held him felt just right and he wished he could stay there forever. Well, in his case, he would. His forever at least. Maybe it was his lucky day too.

“Looks like you no longer have to worry about me knowing your secret anymore.”

“What?” Steve asked, dumbfounded.

“That you’re…” he tried to lift his hand to pull Steve closer, which the other boy seemed to notice because he leaned in while gently putting his hand back on his chest, not removing his own that now rested on top of it. “Bi.”

“For fuck’s sake, Eddie. I couldn’t care less about being bisexual right now. Kind of in the middle of not letting you die here,” Steve grunted. One of the girls shouted something and suddenly Eddie was floating. At least, it felt like he was floating even though gravity kept him perfectly tucked into Steve’s strong arms. He rested his head against Steve, face buried in his neck.

“Not so loud… Dustin might hear,” Eddie said in response to Steve’s outburst. It had taken him a couple minutes to find the words in his brain to form a sentence. Steve ignored him in favor of saving his strength but sighed nonetheless.

“Kissed any pretty boys yet?” Eddie murmured weakly. He tried to close his eyes only to find out that they already were.

“I have, once.”

“Mirror doesn’t count.”

“Shut up. I don’t go around kissing mirrors.”

“No? I would if I was you.” Ah, apparently his filter died before the rest of his brain did. Luckily he didn’t have to live with the embarrassment. Unless this was hell. Wouldn’t surprise him if hell presented itself to him in the form of eternal rejection by Steve Harrington.

“Well, maybe you should’ve just kissed me then,” Steve mumbled. Eddie smiled softly, his lips brushing gently against Steve’s neck as he carefully adjusted him in his arms. Even on a battlefield he still smelled intoxicating. It was unfair.

“No can do, I’d catch feelings.”

“What if I already have?”

Huh?

“What?”

“Nothing,” Steve mumbled quickly. Hmm alright then, hell it was, Eddie concluded. And you know what? To hell with holding back, in that case.

“Hey uh, Steve?”

“Mhm?”

“I really liked kissing you.”

Steve’s POV

While his body continued to move, his brain stopped. He dared to glance down but he couldn’t see Eddie’s face, tucked too deeply in the crevice of his neck. There was no mistaking what he had said though.

“Eddie…”

Steve waited, trying to gather the courage to admit to the same thing. It felt different than suggesting he may or may not have feelings. It had been posed as a question. He wasn’t going to do that now. However, when Eddie didn’t say anything, didn’t even hum, he grew worried.

“Eddie? You still with me?”

Silence. Fuck.

“We have to hurry, we have to— How are we going to get him back up?” Steve questioned, looking at the others. They entered the trailer and Dustin grabbed the tied up sheets that Eddie had cut off before.

“If one of you goes back out to find something else to make a rope with, I can use this to tie his hands and legs around you,” he explained, looking at Steve. “It’s not going to be pretty but I don’t know what else we can do and we need to get out of here.”

Nancy frowned, probably thinking about the many ways this could go wrong, but Steve just nodded and Robin was already looking for a way to get back out. With some help of both Nancy and Dustin lifting her up, she managed to pass through. Once Eddie was secured around Steve, chest to chest, Steve started to climb the rope.

“Try to land slightly on your side so you don’t crush his limbs, hold his head,” Nancy told him, voice etched with worry. Steve hated going before Dustin and Nancy but he had no other choice. Being the only one staying behind with Eddie wasn’t an option either. He could always go back if needed, right?

Dustin and Nancy did what they could to make the climb easier and Robin tried to be ready on the other side to assist in any way.

In the faint moment of weightlessness, Steve quickly let go of the rope, grabbed Eddie’s head to hold it protectively against his chest and braced for impact. He landed mostly on his back but slightly on his side, hitting his shoulder hard. The air was pushed out of his lungs and he gasped as the dead weight of Eddie’s unconscious body crushed him.

“Oh shit,” Robin hissed, pulling them fully on their sides with surprising strength as she started to cut off the knots Dustin had made. Eddie rolled on his back due to lack of support and so did Steve. One was breathing and the other one…

Steve grasped Eddie’s wrist tightly, eyes still closed as he caught his breath. He could feel the faintest heartbeat under his thumb. Okay. That’s good. He pushed himself up with effort and pulled Eddie aside to make room for Dustin and Nancy.

“Steve… you’re bleeding,” Robin said softly, eyes big with worry. She was shaking and he wished he could calm her down somehow.

“Huh?”

Steve looked down and sure enough, it wasn’t just Eddie’s blood smeared all over him. Somewhere along the way one of the wounds on his sides burst open again.

“We’ll look at it later,” he mumbled, and when he heard Dustin yell in pain as he landed on the mattress he felt awful for not thinking about his ankle. Too much was going on. Too much to worry about, too many people to worry about. He held Eddie close to him, ignoring the girls’ concerned voices asking to take over, or to check on him. They needed to get Eddie somewhere safe. He needed to get Eddie somewhere safe.

A FEW DAYS LATER

“Steve… you need rest,” Nancy tried softly, for the umpteenth time. Everyone else had at least paid their homes a visit, taken a shower, put on some fresh clothes. Steve had… well. He had cleaned himself up a bit in the bathroom in Eddie’s hospital room. Did change into the clothes that Robin had gone to get for him at his home after some convincing. She had also brought a few books. Steve bought them a little over a year ago, when Dustin started talking about Lord of the Rings non-stop and how Eddie knew it by heart according to him. He was just curious, he had convinced himself, as if he ever really picked up a thick book like that. But he found that it was actually quite nice to read. It took his mind off things, which was very much welcomed at the moment.

“I’m good Nancy, thanks. I do sleep, you know.”

“In a bed Steve. Are they giving you painkillers here?”

“Yeah.”

When Steve added nothing else to the conversation Nancy nodded and not much later it was just him and Eddie again. One awake and one… not. But he was breathing and his heart was still beating and that was more than Steve could have hoped for.

“So uh, I was thinking,” Steve mumbled softly. “You must be bored out of your mind in there. They always say people can hear you despite being in a coma, right? So what if… I read out loud to you? I’m not a great storyteller like— Like Dustin says you are, but… I can try.” He paused for a moment, gazing at the other boy as if he was going to respond any second and then resumed with a soft sigh. “Before I begin, though. I just wanted to say, sorry I didn’t say anything. Back then.”

While he was referring to Eddie’s confession about liking the kiss, it could have implicated many other moments too. Countless times when his ‘friends’ had insulted Eddie and he had stayed silent. Or when Eddie had called himself a murderous drug dealer and Steve had been too conflicted in his mind to respond in time. There were so many things.

“Sorry to disappoint though. I’m not going to respond now, either. I’ll wait until you’re awake and have the energy to retort in that annoyingly, charming way of yours. Until then, Lord of the Rings it is.”

They had time.

#steddie #steve x eddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #steddie fic #stranger things fanfic

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91vaults · 1 year

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I’ve posted a lot about AI art but i haven’t really posted the underlying emotional response that really drives so much of my thoughts on it.

When Dall-E 2 burst onto the scene I felt a cold pit my stomach. It felt as if something had been taken away. These ML engineers had taken a good chunk of the breadth of human visual art (something that as an artist on any scale you hope to contribute to in your own way) they had drawn a line in the sand and had said to those on the other side: “we don’t need you anymore, we have our tool. You’re obsolete, what you do has no value if our tool can do it better and quicker”

and they had done so seemingly with glee and either wilful ignorance or no care at all for the implications. And made me angry. Most of all because they had done it with the existing work of so many human artists. It was like in Ledgend of Korra when the equalists wanted to take away eveyones bending (disclaimer: i haven’t seen Korra)

That sounds pretty dramatic and i know plenty of people would say that humans have the inate desire to create regardless of any outside factor (and this is true) and this is hardly the death knell for human created art.

it’s very easy to be dismissive or even ridicule some of the arguments people make against AI (it’s “soulless” ain’t a good one even if it feels emotionally true) it’s also very easy to shrug your shoulders and believe that these are just casualties in the name of “progress”

but people need to understand those who are against AI art are grieving. They’re grieving something intangible they don’t quite understand. Maybe it’s their place in the world and what it even means to do what they do. Non artists don’t really understand that, untill an AI will replace them in something they took so much pride and practice in. Those feelings are valid and regardless of your views and to be met with a shrug or an eye roll i think is rather callous.

The luddites weren’t actually wrong. You can make a case the industrialisation was a net good for all, but again: the luddites weren’t stupid. They understood the implications.

I don’t feel this way as much anymore since i processed my feelings on the topic and have moves on. Art wasn’t meant to be a source of income for me, and the existence of AI won’t stop my quest for artistic glory. If anything I will double down out of spite. But we could stand to be a little more compassionate to people who do truly feel AI is a threat to them in some way. We don’t know what the future is going to look like, but it can be pretty overwhelming to think about.

#ai art discourse #ai art #ai art generation #mid journey #midjourney #stable diffusion #art thoughts #artist #dalle 2 #ai art constroversy

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shadowhunterssizzy · 1 year

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The one post to rule them all: a comparison between LOTR and ACOTAR

Disclaimer: this is just my opinion about how the azriel pov mirrors the trio between Aragorn, arwen and eowyn and is a very LOOSE theory which means they are not a copy of each other and it’s my interpretation. If you are pro gwynriel i suggest you to ignore this post because i’ll be talking about the similarities between the LOTR trio and the one in ACOTAR. Also i’m following mostly the movies but i’ll add extracts from the books to make my point. Again, i know LOTR is huge and i don’t want to offend anyone.

Disclaimer 2: i’m aware of the meaning behind arwen’s name and how some things might parallel gwyn ,however, this is my interpretation of the context and if you think the opposite you are more than welcome to create your own post. This is meant for elriels and elriels only. I think that’s all. That being said welcome :D

This whole post is about the similarities between Aragorn/Arwen/Eowyn and the whole Elain/Azriel/Gwyn. I want to clarify that i believe elain story is next and it’s about her choice but i’ve noticed some similarities between the dynamic in LOTR and the dynamics we see in ACOSF, but mostly in azriel POV. Again, this is a very loose post and it’s based on my interpretation. I want to start with the key players and why they are similar:

Arwen/Elain:

While they are vastly different i found arwen’s and elain’s arc intertwined. In the books Tolkien describes arwen as:

‘’ a quiet person, but not a shy one, rather with the profound gravitas of someone who has a youthful visage but the wisdom that only comes from a long life’’

(FRODO UPON HIS FIRST MEET WITH ARWEN, THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING)

While elain is not as old as Arwen (who had a pretty long life before frodo’s journey has started) they are both described as shy and quiet. They are rather observant and they don’t play a big role in the series. Arwen plays a bigger role in the movie and i think Elain is going to play a bigger role in the upcoming books. They are both gorgeous (hello, liv tyler is STUNNING) and they are both made fun of due to their hobbies and their minor roles in the story.

In LOTR ,arwen doesn’t play your average role. She doesn’t go to war like other females and she doesn’t fight with a sword. I’m going to use an extract from one tumblr page i’ve read so you can see arwen’s main role:

‘’She doesn’t go riding off to war like Eowyn and she doesn’t run a country like Galadriel; she’s the courtly ideal of a noble lady who sits quietly at home, being beautiful, and waits for her man to go out and defeat the dark lord.

What that assessment misses is what it cost Arwen to do that and what else she does.’’

Source: lawyernovelist on tumblr

I highly encourage you to read the post above ,so you can see how arwen’s role was important in the whole middle earth story, even if it was minor. As you can see, like elain, she’s someone who is supposed to be sat down at home while looking pretty and waiting for her man to come. This heavily mirrors Elain, a beauty who was brought up as a tool to get a good marriage. Both Arwen and Elain are feminine, shy, quiet and not warriors.

However they have other strengths that need to be noted. Neither Arwen or Elain carry a sword, however they play a big part on the upcoming wars. First, we have arwen. People believe Arwen did nothing because she wasn’t at the front in the middle of the war but in the fellowship of the ring she rides with frodo and faces Nazgul. She uses her power in the river to SAVE frodo (who is the main hero) and makes sure to take him safe and sound to Rivendell. Mind you, the Nazgul are extremely powerful and there’s 7 of them against Arwen and a dying Frodo.

During ACOWAR, Elain is the one who has visions about the future and who locates and tracks down the cauldron. Like Arwen, she’s not a warrior, she’s not on the battlefield but she gets the job done and helps everyone by having those visions.

Also during the big war, people believe all Arwen does is stay at home and they mock her because she loves embrodiery. Both Arwen and Elain enjoy hobbies that are often dismissed and overlooked and made fun of because they are not funny or adventorous. But like Elain, Arwen’s hobbies play a big role in the war:

‘’She also creates a banner for Aragorn and sends it to him.

I can already hear the response that sitting and doing embroidery is not that much different to sitting and waiting. But that banner is actually really important. That’s the thing that marks Aragorn’s identity as he leads the ships up from the south. That’s the thing that puts hope into the defenders of Minas Tirith. Without that banner, Aragorn’s just a random human leader. Helpful, but lacking the massive impact his arrival actually had. Arwen made that banner for him as a symbol of her hope and faith in him and so that he could fly it at the exact right moment to bring victory out of defeat. And that was what it did. It’s not slaying the Witch-king or casting down Dol Guldur, but it’s certainly not nothing.

Arwen may have been quieter, acting in more of a supporting role, but she nonetheless used that role to powerful effect. She is determined, warm, loving, filled with integrity and dignity. She stands up for her choices and takes the rougher path. She does not fit the mould of a Strong Female Character, but she is nonetheless strong in her own way and should not be disdained or dismissed.’’

Source: Lawyernovelist on tumblr

Much like Elain ,they both play a role behind the scenes. Elain with her visions and arwen with the banner that later on, aragorn would use in the battle. They are not fighters but their strength and their power is different.

Arwen and Elain have more in common than what we think. While Tolkien didn’t give Arwen a major role, he gave her an interesting storyline. And her storyline had to do with choice. Arwen’s journey is about her choices. Is about her coming to terms with what she wants vs what she’s supposed to do. Arwen is the daughter of Elrond and she grew up with her grandma. However, her destiny is to leave middle earth and go to the undying lands with her kind. Arwen is meant to fullfill her dad’s wishes and what others expect of her. But in the end, all of her journey lays down to one thing: choice. And arwen wants to stay with aragorn. She’s torn because she has to lose her dad and she loves him very much. She’s someone who wants to make her dad happy and who wants to follow her people. Elrond encourages her to leave middle earth several times:

‘‘Elrond: "Arwen. Tollen i lû. I chair gwannar na Valannor. Si bado, no círar." (Arwen. It is time. The ships are leaving for Valinor. Go now, before it is too late.)

Arwen: "I've made my choice."

Elrond: "He is not coming back. Why do you linger when there is no hope?"

Arwen: "There is still hope."

(LOTR: THE TWO TOWERS SCENE)

And then we have sweet Elain saying this in ACOWAR:

‘’It's already ended badly. Now it's just a matter of deciding how we meet the consequences.”

(ELAIN ARCHERON, ACOWAR)

The choice that Arwen has to make is not an easy one. Either she follows her destiny and what her dad has prepared for her, or she stays in the middle earth with a man who will die eventually. Elain has to choose between what the cauldron had for her since ACOMAF or the guy she actually wants canonically. But in the end, both arwen and elain have to face one thing: choosing her future. And for Arwen it won’t be easy either:

‘’Here you will dwell, bound to you grief, under the fading trees, until all the world has changed and the long years of your life are utterly spent."

(LOTR, THE TWO TOWERS)

Both Elain and her have to make a decision that will affect their lives forever. Arwen would give up her own inmortality, her family and her own dad and elain will have to pay a cost for choosing her true love, but what’s important is that these two characters have to make decisions for themselves and face the consecuences. Both had a path written for them and they never had a choice. Arwen had to follow her dad and go to the Undying lands and give up her love for Aragorn; Elain had to grow up and marry a man and live with him just because that’s what her family expected of her. And now, the cauldron and everyone is encouraging her to follow the mating bond and give up of anything else. To do what’s expected of them. For Arwen i,s to go to the undying lands and reject Aragorn; for Elain is to follow the fae rules and accept a bond with a man she didn’t choose and who was thrown at her randomly after her most traumatic experience. We don’t know what would elain do but we know what choice Arwen made and i think it’s POWERFUL. When faced with the consecuences of her choice this is what she says:

‘‘Mine is the choice of Luthien, and as she so have I chosen, both the sweet and the bitter.”

ARWEN, LOTR.

You can see that the message is there: choice. For her, for her future, for her own mortality and for her undying love towards Aragorn.

Aragorn/Azriel:

While i believe their journeys are vastly different, there’s some similarities between aragorn and azriel that are worth mentioning:

‘’A quiet, almost brooding individual, Aragorn seeks only the company of a select few people who he can trust’‘

Like Aragorn, Azriel is someone who is extremely quiet and who doesn’t trust a lost of people but he’s loyal and loves the ones he’s close with. Aragorn and azriel didn’t grow up in easy conditions but both found a family and a purpose. Aragorn was meant to be the king of gondor and i think azriel will play a bigger role in the upcoming books. What it’s interesting about these two is their constant feelings of unworthiness and how they are a current theme throughout the series. We know that azriel feels unworthy of anyone’s love. He’s afraid of his scars and how people would perceive them. We know he believes the cauldron is wrong but he also believes he’s not worthy of elain at some point. Aragorn was a little bit luckier in the romance department (because his relationship with arwen was established really early on in the story) ,but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel this way. A recurrent Aragorn theme is how he feels unworthy of being a king and a leader. His ancestor Isildur failed with the ring and he believes he might succumb to it’s power at some point. He feels weak and carries the burden of his ancestors and it takes him a long time to accept himself ,not only as the king of Gondor but also as someone worthy of love and respect despite Isildur’s actions.

‘’A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship. But it is not this day. An hour of wolves and shattered shields, when the age of men comes crashing down. But it is not this day! This day, we fight!”

(LOTR, THE RETURN OF THE KING)

Eowyn/Gwyn:

Like Aragorn and Azriel, Eowyn and Gwyn might not have a lot of things in common but i think there’s a few worth mentioning.

Both Eowyn and Gwyn live a very secluded life for different reasons. Eowyn has to stay with her uncle in Rohan and she barely leaves the palace due to her uncle’s sickness.

‘’What do you fear, lady?' he asked. 'A cage,' she said.” ― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King

Gwyn had a traumatic event that led her to the safety of the library and the priestesses, however we do know she wishes to leave the library and to be a warrior. Eowyn, on the other hand is trapped because Wormtongue has a hold of her uncle and she needs to take care of him and his destiny:

‘’Oh, but you are alone. Who knows what you have spoken to the darkness, alone, in the bitter watches of the night, when all your life seems to shrink, the walls of your bower closing in about you, a hutch to trammel some wild thing in? So fair, yet so cold like a morning of pale Spring still clinging to Winter's chill.’’

(WORMTONGUE TO EOWYN, LOTR, THE TWO TOWERS)

Both Eowyn and Gwyn share a kind spirit and a wish they want to fullfill. They want to fight. They want to be seen. They want to leave their mark in the world one way or another. Eowyn secretly trains and knows how to use a sword. She wants to go to the battle and even though she’s been secluded her whole life, she’s determined to fight alongside the men. Gwyn is determined to win the Bloodrite alongside her sisters and to prove all of the Ylirian males that she’s worthy as well.

“And she answered: 'All your words are but to say: you are a woman, and your part is in the house. But when the men have died in battle and honour, you leave to be burned in the house, for the men will need it no more. But I am of the House of Eorl and not a serving-woman. I can ride and wield blade, and I do not fear either pain or death.'

(EOWYN, THE RETURN OF THE KING)

‘’I want to take the road that no one dares travel, and I want to travel it with you two. No matter what may befall us. Not as Illyrians, not for their titles but as something new . To prove to them, to everyone, that something new and different might triumph over their rules and restrictions.”

(GWYN, ACOSF)

As you can tell both have a common goal. To prove man kind that they are worthy, that they can fight and held a sword and that they have wishes and dreams that can be achieved. Eowyn defeats the dead king in the iconic:

Both Eowyn and Gwyn proved that they can fight in a male centered world and thats why i think they are alike.

THE NECKLACE, THE PARALLELS AND THE AZRIEL POV:

While i personally do not believe the necklace would play a big part in the upcoming ACOTAR books, i think it’s interesting to mention a few things:

Azriel POV starts with him giving a necklace to Elain. He bought it with a clear idea and it reminded him of her. It was a thing of secret, lovely beauty and it represents elain.

In the books, Aragorn gifts Arwen a ring that symbolizes their love and potential engagement, but in the movies they changed it to a necklace. Why it is so important?. Well because there’s some parallels between the necklace and the meaning and the consecuences:

-In ACOSF, Azriel gives elain a necklace that embodies what she represents. it has a rose, and it’s something that he gives elain after sharing some glances and delicate touches. They are not in a relationship, but it represents something. It’s the first gift azriel gives her during solstice and it’s something that he bought with elain in mind.

Now the necklace that Arwen gives Aragorn is called the ‘’Evenstar’’. It represents light and the unconditional love that she has for him. However, the interesting thing about this necklace is that much like Rhysand, Elrond is not happy with the romance between her daughter and Aragorn. He’s not as mad as rhysand because he’s more controlled but he constantly reminds Arwen of the dangers of staying with him. Rhysand reminds azriel that elain’s destiny is tied to lucien and the mating bond so both men have to see the fate of the women they love growing apart from them:

-Elain has to be with Lucien because that’s what the Cauldron choose.

-Arwen has to leave the middle earth to go to the undying lands and aragorn has to make peace with it

‘‘You are to stay away from her’‘

(RHYSAND, ACOSF EXCLUSIVE BAM POV)

(ELROND TO ARAGORN, THE LORD OF THE RINGS)

While different, the message is pretty similar. We have two really powerful authorities figures (rhysand, high lord of the night court; elrond, a noble half elf) telling someone with less power that they are to stay away from their love interests. Elrond does’t forbid aragorn or arwen to stay away from each other; in fact he’s aware of it and allows it to happen. However, like rhysand, elrond makes a big effort to remind aragorn that arwen has another destiny; her path is written and it’s tied to her people and what she’s supposed to do. Elain, has to follow the fae rules because she has a mate and can’t be with anyone else. Both aragorn and azriel are being constantly reminded by others that the women have other plans and they are not supposed to be part of them. Arwen has to choose inmortality and Elain has to choose a mate.

Then we have eowyn and aragorn. Eowyn is fascinated by aragorn upon their first meet. We don’t know how gwyn feels regarding azriel because we don’t get to see her reactions but we know she’s intrigued by him. Something similar happens to eowyn when she first meets aragorn:

‘’she now was suddenly aware of him: tall heir of kings, wise with many winters, greycloaked, hiding a power that yet she felt. For a moment still as stone she stood, then turning swiftly she was gone." (The King of the Golden Hall).

Eowyn is fascinated by Aragorn’s presence and for good reason. She grew up guarded, only knowing the company of her siblings, uncle and a weirdo. Aragorns appears in the scene and he’s older. Extremely attractive. He’s a hero, someone who’s broody and mysterious and someone that notices her.

During the two towers, eowyn is training with a sword. Aragorn clashes his sword with hers and they have a little exchange:

Aragorn : You have some skill with a blade.

Eowyn : The women of this country learned long ago, those without swords can still die upon them. I fear neither death nor pain.

While in the tolkien canon is known that eowyn had feelings for aragorn, in the ACOTAR canon we don’t even know if gwyn feels any attraction towards azriel or any men for that matter. We know that she admires him. We know that he trains her and the others for a while and nesta claims she views him as the new ribbon. But it’s a dynamic pretty much like the one that goes on between aragorn and eowyn:

"You desired to have the love of the Lord Aragorn. Because he was high and puissant, and you wished to have renown and glory and to be lifted far above the mean things that crawl on the earth. And as a great captain may to a young soldier he seemed to you admirable. For so he is, a lord among men, the greatest that now is. But when he gave you only understanding and pity, then you desired to have nothing, unless a brave death in battle. Look at me, Éowyn!" (The Steward and the King)

Gwyn views Az as this figure who she can challenge. Someone who is powerful and she desires to prove him wrong. Much like Eowyn, she wants to be seen in a world where the males are predominant. Eowyn has her first encounter with Aragorn and Gwyn does it with azriel after being secluded for many years. Sure, Eowyn is way more developed than Gwyn in the tolkien canon but i believe their relationship mirrors the one that aragorn and eorwyn shared.

Aragorn was way older, he was wise, he was respectful, he saw Eowyn. Unlike the men around her, Aragorn recognizes her potential. They share a few words here and there, she admires him and he’s charming, mysterious and he’s there. But Aragorn has feelings for another woman. Funny enough, Eowyn finds out about Arwen thanks to:

TADANNN. The necklace. Aragorn is not an idiot and he’s never been rejected so he doesn’t feel the need to regift the necklace but eowyn sees it and knows it belongs to another woman. She knows about arwen because the necklace is there and aragorn is wearing it really close to his heart. It’s awrens gift, it represents their love and compromise but it’s mostly a reminder of arwen and her promise to him.

Also, sarah is a really big fan of tolkien and while i might be reaching a lot i think this is worth mentioning:

‘’It is possible to love more than one person (of the other sex) at the same time, but in a different mode and intensity. I do not think that Eowyn's feelings for Aragorn really changed much; and when he was revealed as so lofty a figure, in descent and office, she was able to go on loving and admiring him. He was old, and that is not only a physical quality: when not accompanied by any physical decay age can be alarming or awe-inspiring. (The Letters of J.R.R. Tolkien, letter 234)’’

Disclaimer number 2338223: I don’t think gwyn has the same feelings for azriel as Eowyn did for aragorn nor do i think she views az the same way. Also i don’t think every character needs to have a li and i don’t think sarah set the dynamic between those two the same way tolkien did. My point is that i think both females might view the guys under the same light. With admiration, respect and maybe as a crush. Eowyn liked aragorn but we don’t know if gwyn has any sort of feelings towards azriel since it was never implied and in azriel pov she was there. This theory is just my opinion on the events but i don’t know what sarah is going to do with gwyn in the upcoming books!.

I don’t think gwyn loves azriel in any shape of form. I don’t even think she likes him that much but like eowyn she might be intrigued by someone who’s older, inspiring and respectful. And i believe much like eowyn, she would find someone else at some point or maybe not.Both are fine btw. For Aragorn, Eowyn might have been a good match. She was a royal, she was the lady of rohan and most importantly she was human. Unlike Arwen, Eowyn didn’t have to give up her life to be with him. Aragorn was born to rule gondor and a potential alliance with rohan would have benefited him. But aragorn wanted arwen and Eowyn had another man waiting for her somewhere else (even if she wasn’t aware.( And even if she didn’t find Faromir let’s be honest, eowyn would’ve been fine). Someone who was way more fitting and someone who was not in love with another woman and that’s what she deserved.

Again, the eowyn/aragorn part might be a reach because their relationship was way more established than the one az has with gwyn (he doesn’t even consider her as a friend) but i thought this is the route sarah might take in the future books because some casual viewers thought aragorn could choose eowyn in the end instead of Arwen. But it was a red herring and they weren’t meant to be together, even though they shared some scenes and some moments that might be misleading. Arwen was away and out of reach so tolkien could’ve used eowyn as the one for aragorn. But arwen was there before, in his mind and in his heart. And in the end, arwen chose aragorn. She chose a mortal life for him and because she wanted to make the choice that was best for her. And i hope elain would make the choice that she wants in the future as well.

I believe that’s all! I hope you enjoyed this little post. I apologize for any grammar mistakes. English is not my first language so i was sweating while making this. I wanted to write a parallel between faramir/lucien but my fingers are too tired right now. i hope you enjoy this little rant and mess and if you love LOTR and acotar i truly hope you loved it!

#elriel #proelriel #elain #elain and azriel #elain archeron #lotr #elain x azriel #Azriel #acotar #sarahjmaas

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you-can-be-what-you-want-to-be · 1 year

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Hi, I’m sorry I’m bringing this to your ask box because the original post is getting a bit lengthy - I didn’t meant to say you’re not a shipper or anything like that!!! I have seen people who say they’re not shippers express frustration with the quote being taken out of context, and that was the kind of sentiment I was targeting.

I’m also truly sorry that you felt people were misleading you with their posts about the podcast, but I don’t get the impression that Beejhawk shippers who WERE posting that quote out of context were genuinely trying to fabricate a narrative in which their relationship was canon or confirmed. I’ve seen the same posts and to me, those posts that happened after the podcast were written by fans who were excited to hear Mike’s interpretation of their postwar relationship included them keeping in touch in some manner.

I also don’t think anyone has argued that Mash has any canonical gay relationships - at least, I haven’t seen that, and a disclaimer that I’ve only been a fan for a year or so! But I hope no one told you that and I’m sorry if they did. It’s just a show that one can have a lot of fun watching in a queer way - all while keeping in mind that that was NOT the original intention.

I do really recommend you listen to the actual podcast bc it’s a really beautiful conversation between two people who love the show a lot.

I’m sorry you felt you were tricked but I truly don’t think anyone intended that to happen.

Please don’t feel pressured to post this or respond, I just wanted to explain myself to you without making the post longer! 💓

Hey no hard feelings! At worst I was frustrated bc I felt misunderstood, but I didn’t feel like I was being ignored or invalidated. It’s an on off ship depending on what themes of the show I’m focusing on. I hope I didn’t come across too harsh and I’m sorry if I did. It was more frustration that the original meaning and quote was getting ignored more than anything because the entire idea of the war changing them and them being life rafts to each other who wouldn’t have talked if not for the war and the entire goodbye debate was important to me more than I was about the shipping, I didn’t think Mike was saying that explicitly as a ship thing (though I wouldn’t put it past him lol) but I never had the full quote bc it got cut short for the sake of shipping which is frustrating, and a lot of other fandoms DO say things are canon that aren’t so that attitude was already on my mind more as a behavior than anything relating to mash itself. I look forword to getting there I listen to a few mash podcasts but am not caught up on any of them. I appreciate you checking I’m ok tho! I hope you are the same and don’t feel stressed about the conflicting ideas and that I wasn’t too harsh in the way I expressed my opinion.

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dwc-jamc-spn · 3 years

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um. do *ahem* ✨certain✨ ✨people✨ not understand that destiel isn’t about sex?

when we say we ship destiel or we want destiel to be canon, that does not mean we want to see Dean and Castiel having sex on screen. it just doesn’t.

i mean sure. some destiel shippers definitely want to see it, but the majority of us literally just want hunter husband content. we want the bickering, the exasperation that comes from loving a special kind of dumbass, the petty little pranks they’d pull on each other—all of that kind of stuff. no sex. we just want Dean and Castiel going on hunts and calling each other babe. that’s. it. we want representation.

it’s problematic that *ahem* ✨certain✨ ✨people✨ equate destiel and destiel shippers with sex. it radiates a certain kind of hate that has no place in this fandom.

#destiel #destiel shippers #literally 90% of the people I’ve ever talked to have never even wanted a sex scene between Dean and Castiel #because sex is not the fucking point of destiel. it’s not and to say it is? gross.#you lose brownie point if you think that wanting destiel to be canon/shipping destiel = wanting to see sex scenes/just sex in general #and yes. those certain people are exactly who you think I’m talking about.#also those certain people include the CW producers and writers.#they’ve produced and written some of the most homophobic shit I’ve ever seen and it’s disgusting #anyway. yeah.#THESE NEXT TAGS ARE JUST MY OPINION OKAY you don’t have to agree #and honestly handholding is the most of any blatant romantic physical affection I would even want to see.#clap on the back? yes. arm slung over Cas’s shoulder? give that to me yes. shoulder/arm squeeze of reassurance? i melt for that shit.#but hand holding is the farthest I would even want to see on screen.#i guess basically what I want is destiel to be recognized and shown in little moments of affection but not in my face?#idk if that makes sense. like I want it to be alluded to that they sleep in the same bed and they go on dates?#but (this is gonna sound so wrong but I don’t mean it that way) but I don’t want to see the really romantically intimate moments?#idek how to explain it but I want it to be easy to mistake they’re not dating to outsiders? but they 100% are #and they’re 210% in love and that is obvious to Sam and Jack and Charlie and Claire and Jody and everyone who’s close to them #disclaimer: don’t like this post? it wasn’t meant for you. ignore it.

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italeean · 2 years

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Just a massage

Yuri is drained from his training and his lover offers his a massage. Unfortunately the Russian doesn't manage to understand his true intentions in

NOTE: Hi everyone, I hope you're doing great!! I've been wanting to write about Yuuri on Ice for a while, but my brain decided to not provide me any ideas (until now, that is). I won’t even begin with how much I love Yuri Plisetsky, otherwise the note would be longer than the fic lol :) I hope you like it, support and/or suggestions are always appreciated ^_^ And, as the anon from yesterday said, ricordatevi sempre di essere felici 💚🤍❤️ (remember to always be happy)

PS. Sorry for not posting this yesterday, but I got tired (I usually write after dinner) and didn’t feel like rushing it just to post it

DISCLAIMER: This is a tickle fic, if it's not to your taste I don't suggest you read it

‘I’m home’ Yuri said as he entered his and Otabek’s apartment. ‘Wel... come back’ the dark-haired ice skater surely did not expect to see his lover as he was when his gaze met his own. Hair disheveled, dark bags under his eyes and the most emaciated expression. He immediately understood that Yakov had decided to be a demon with Yuri’s training routine.

‘Hey honey, training drained you today, huh? Come on, go take a nap, you have a bit more than an hour before dinner’ the Kazakh said. ‘No, don’t worry, I’m not tired at all, who do you take me for?’ the blonde was definitely exhausted, even his supposed-to-be-snarky remark lacked its usual fire. ‘Yeaah, I’m not buying it, go and rest. now.’ Unfortunately Otabek’s “intimidating” tone had no effect on his boyfriend, who, in exchange, said ‘I don’t like repeating myself, I don’t need sle-EEP! Put me down this instant!!’

Otabek knew how stubborn his lover could be, so he opted to go straight with drastic measures. He picked up the petite guy and carried him to the bedroom, ignoring the prolonged string of (not really meant) insults and overly dramatic complaints. On the other hand, he smiled internally at the fact that Yuri was so tired that he was speaking half-Russian without realizing. And, despite his demands of being put down, he clung onto him as if he was asking him to never let go.

As the couple reached the room, the taller guy laid Yuri on the bed and tucked him in, not without him rustling a bit because “this was stupid and he wasn’t tired”. The blonde would have fought him much more, but was his head touched the pillow, all the pent-up drowsiness hit him like a truck without giving him an actual chance to resist the urge to close his eyes. Otabek tsk-ed when he saw the tiny guy already sound asleep, gave him a soft kiss on the forehead and went to the kitchen to get dinner started.

A couple of hours later, the ice skater was woken up by a pleasant smell of Pirozhki and some gentle caresses on his cheek. ‘Hey sleepyhead, dinner’s ready. Wanna come to the kitchen?’

The scent of his favorite food was more than enough to make Yuri fully awake, also because, now that tiredness wasn’t a problem anymore, he remembered he was starving, too. The Kazakh was more than convinced that he’d never seen his lover run that fast towards the kitchen. Once they sat down at the table, they began eating, and it was surprising to see such a tiny guy eat that much and that fast.

When they finished their meal, the Russian took a quick refreshing shower and reached his partner on the bed where he’d put on a movie to enjoy a chill night together. However, his sore muscles didn’t agree to that idea and finding a good position turned out to be much harder than expected. The dark haired guy noticed how restless and frustrated his lover was, so he decided to help.

‘Oi Yuri, would it help if I gave you a massage?’ Yuri was a bit taken aback, but he didn’t think it was a bad idea. After all, it was difficult to make his situation worse.

He took his shirt off to give Otabek better access to his aching back and neck, and then he laid on his stomach. The dark-eyed guy put himself immediately to work and began loosening the many knots in the ice skater’s neck. Something didn’t feel right to the Russian, though, he could swear that, while Otabek’s thumbs were actually working, the other fingers were fluttering all over the sensitive spot. Did his boyfriend know what he was doing? Yuri had no idea, so he bit his lip, clenched the sheets and held back the giggles that were threatening to spill.

‘Something wrong, Yuri? You’re supposed to relax, not to get more tense’ ‘Y-yeah sure, you’re doing great, go on’ if he hadn’t been laying face down, the petite guy would’ve noticed the teasy, mischievous and pretty sadistic smirk plastered all over the Kazakh’s face. However, the latter carried on with his massage going down to his back, starting with the shoulder blades and making his way towards the last vertebrae. One thing became more evident, though, the fingers that weren’t massaging were tapping and drumming against Yuri’s ribs and sides, making it difficult for him to stay still.

To Otabek it was endearing how much his partner tried to hide his ticklishness, and, unfortunately for said partner, he wanted more of those cute little reactions. ‘I’m gonna try a different technique, is it alright with you?’ he asked. ‘Yeah yeah whatever, just get on with it...’ to everyone Yuri’s reply would’ve seemed rude, but the shaky tone of his voice gave away his nervousness.

The blonde was not-so-pleasantly surprised when he felt ten fingers delicately stroking up and down his sides and ribs, even daring to go up to the underarms every now and then. ‘T-this ih nohot... a massage’ oh no. The usually snarky boy knew that his defenses were starting to crumble. And his lover was well aware, too. ‘What do you mean it’s not? Are you that ungrateful?’ Otabek fake-gasped dramatically, but at the same time he started wiggling his fingers a bit, increasing the ticklish sensation.

‘Something wrooong?’ how he could be so mean to keep teasing him when cute little squeaks could clearly be heard, was beyond Yuri’s mind. ‘Yohohou exahactly know what!’ he replied trying to sound mad and intimidating (utterly failing at both). ‘Uhmm... nope, no clue at all, sorry...’ the Russian could literally hear the smirk in his lover’s voice. ‘...maybe if I keep doing it, I’ll figure out what it is’ ‘Please wait a minUTEHE- NO!!’

Too late, Yuri’s dorky boyfriend had already begun poking and prodding all around his torso, knowing from experience that a harder touch worked much better on him. ‘Hahahahahahah yohohohou idiohohot stop ihiihit’ the blonde screamed. ‘Not a chance, love, you’ve been so grumpy and stressed out those days, this will help you cheer up’ apparently Otabek didn’t intend to stop anytime soon. In fact, he carried on with his “cheer-up mission” in the sweetest-yet-cruelest way he could.

‘Gohohohoho awahahahahyehehe nahahahaha’ the Kazakh was still squeezing Yuri’s sides when the poor guy started making requests. ‘Okay’ he simply responded... only to begin an awful rib-counting. An awfully ticklish rib-counting.

‘One... two... three...’ oh god, to say that Yuri was going crazy was an understatement. ‘Three... four... fiv-’ ‘Nahahahaha yohou sahahaid threehehe two tihihimehes’ ‘Really now? I must start all over then hehehe’ and back to the base of the ribcage he went. ‘You juhuhust havehehe toho ahahadd onehe to youhur cohohouhunting hahahaha’ the proposition was merely ignored by the evil tickler, who resumed his work without showing any mercy.

In the meanwhile, the blonde was getting more and more distressed, the only problem was that said distress was reflected as anger and sass. ‘Juhuhust add onehehehe ahahare you thahahahat duhumb?!’ now he’d really done it. ‘Oho? Me? Dumb? The audacity...’ It was obvious that the dark-eyed guy wasn’t mad about that insult, but he still took the chance to up his game.

He manhandled the petite ice skater and turned him on his back. When he met his gaze he saw three things: slight embarrassment, a bit of anticipation and... eagerness maybe?

Otabek winked at him before turning around to scribble lightly on his partner’s knees, just to let him know what was coming. ‘Nohohohohoho dohohohohon’t pleheheheahahahsehehe’ the green-eyed boy was literally a blushing and giggling mess, and he was barely doing anything! ‘Don’t what? I’m really not doing anything this time’ ‘Sohoho yohohouhuhu ahahadmihihit yohohouhuhu knehehew ihihit frohohom thehehe stahart yohouhu ihihidihiOHOHOT NAHAHAHHAHAHA’ Yuri had officially had reached his lover’s limit of patience.

‘Haven’t you learned where your name-calling brings you already? I suppose I have to explain it to you in detail’ this could mean only one thing, the Ice Tiger of Russia was about to receive the tickle of a lifetime.

The statement proved itself to be totally right, in fact the Kazakh had his fun scribbling all over and behind the blonde’s knees, giving him pokes to make him squeal and doing the egg-crack move, which was killer for him. However, before unleashing this absolute hell on his lover, he stayed still for a good minute, enjoying the adorable little whines Yuri was making because of the anticipation. If it were for him, he would’ve kept him like that forever.

‘HAHAHAHAHAHA BEKAHAHAHA NOHOHOHOHOHO IHIHITS SOHOHO BAHAHAHD PLEHEHEHAHAHASE’ In other circumstances, the taller guy would’ve teased him about his begging, but this time he heard a thing he’d never expected to hear from his lover. ‘What did you call me?’ he asked. On the other hand, the Russian was crimson-red and internally kicking himself for that nickname, so he answered ‘NOHOHOHOTHIHIHING IHIHI DIHIHIDN’T SAHAHAHAY AHAHANYTHIHIHING’ he wanted to be stubborn about that? Unfortunately for him, Otabek was more than fine with that (and maybe slightly hoping to receive such a response from him).

‘Nothing, huh? Very well then, I won’t stop until you tell me’ and he kept his words. He continued his gentle but ruthless assault until Yuri couldn’t take it anymore and decided to tap out. ‘IHIHIHIHI CAHAHAHAHALLEHEHED YOHOHOUHUHU BEHEHEKAHAHA NOHOHOW STAHAHAP’ The older guy was satisfied with the answer and eventually stopped, admiring the mess who was currently laying on the bed. His hair were ruffled, there were tears in the corner of his eyes and his cheeks were completely flushed. He swore that there wasn’t a more wholesome and heartwarming sight in the whole world.

When the tiny guy recovered from the brutal attack, he said ‘Call me that again please. I love that nickname’. ‘Y-you mean Beka? Come on, it’s so dumb!! How can you like it?’ the blond ice skater was genuinely confused. Wasn’t it too sappy for his lover? ‘Careful with your words, if I hear you say such nonsense ever again, I won’t hesitate to use my methods to prove you wrong’ well, apparently not. Yuri perfectly understood the allusion and decided to not say anything about it.

The couple then remembered about the movie they’d put on, which had already reached the end credits, and decided to turn off the tv and keep cuddling for a while.

After half an hour, Otabek heard some soft snores coming from the tiny figure curled up on top of him, resembling more a kitten than an ice tiger. He smiled fondly and gave him a sweet peck on the forehead, then he turned off the table lamp and reached his lover in dreamland.

#yuri on ice #yoi #yoi tickle #ticklish!yuri #lee!yuri #ler!otabek #yuri plisetsky #otabek altin #otayuri #tickle fic #tickle #ticklish

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