#don't ignore the lil snake aziraphale

[thorin-is-a-cuddler]

Don't leave your demon uncuddled

A/N: Crowley wants cuddles, but Aziraphale never stops reading. This calls for drastic measures.

When Crowley had introduced Aziraphale to the marvels of staying in bed all day – all week, all month, not yet all year – long, he’d had a very specific picture in mind: the two of them wrapped around each other, respective noses buried in shades of cream-colored and auburn-tinted hair, eyes merely opening to exchange glances of fond admiration, warmth encompassing them both in a timeless embrace, a fest of never seizing cuddles.

In Crowley’s opinion, this plan should have worked out fine. Not a single obstacle had presented itself to him when he’d set out to tempt the angel into the gentle embrace of warm blankets and soft pillows. What the demon had underestimated at the time, was the power of Aziraphale’s books.  

If the angel were asked to list his favourite things since… well always, he’d most certainly list Crowley first and foremost. The mention of his books were, nevertheless, only one breath away.

So, quite unexpectedly, since Aziraphale’s introduction to spending quality time in bed, Crowley had not been succumbed to countless hours of cuddling, but to a quite unsatisfyingly absent angel whose face tended to disappear behind the pages of a leather bound classic. Moving between the covers and pillows ended up being rather unpleasant, since numerous pointy hardbacks stuck out on either side of the mattress. And if he got really unlucky, Aziraphale even left their pillow fort for a while, putting many cold miles between their vessels, only to return with more books.

To be fair, the giddy face of the angel who seemed to experience a whole new level of dedication to his favourite hobby was rather endearing and Crowley could not seriously bring himself to complain to Aziraphale about the lack of physical attention to himself. Besides, the angel was a rather entertaining reader, exclaiming and gasping and giggling all the while which did give Crowley some fun hours, as he simply watched him, curled up by his side, shaking his demonic head with a soft smile.

Sometimes Aziraphale had found good compromises: petting Crowley’s back while reading out loud to him or drawing the lines on the pages out with a single finger between Crowley’s shoulder blades. He was also really unbothered about Crowley’s choosing of which way to position himself around or on top of the angel, across his belly, next to his side, underneath his arm – nothing disturbed Aziraphale when he was reading.

Crowley had therefore enjoyed some of the time they’d passed in bed together.

But after two weeks of frequent reading and of books piling up around them like a flooding tide, Crowley did start to feel like he was drowning in old ink and crinkly pages. And it had to come to an end.

“Angel,” he moaned, when hours had passed with only the sound of pages turning, the repetition transforming it into a form of torture to his ears. He was curled up by Aziraphale’s side, the blanket allowing for nothing but his hair and his yellow eyes to stick out – his expression was all but pleased. “Aziraphale!!” He repeated, slipping his head out from underneath the blanket entirely, intensifying the glare he directed up at the angel’s face.

“Hmmm?” He asked, not even looking at the demon, his blue eyes glued on the pages that shielded him from the warm and welcome temptation of snuggling in peace.

Crowley groaned and had to summon all his lazy powers to slip out one arm from underneath the comfort of the blanket. He moved it up to put his hand between the stupid book and the angelic face. “Haven’t you done enough reading for now?”

Aziraphale swatted Crowley’s hand away like a pestering fly and didn’t pay much attention to his responding hiss. “Crowley, why don’t you just go back to sleep, that’s a dear.”

Surprisingly, the displeased look in Crowley’s eyes grew even less pleased than prior and the demon struggled to pull out arm number two from within the sweet – and currently only – embrace of his blanket to cross both of them over his chest meaningfully. “Can’t you just put your book down for a few months and… just…” cuddle meee?, he continued in his head, but a sudden twang of insecurity avoided the words from leaving his tongue.

His lips turned into a thin line, when Aziraphale’s sole reaction consisted of a quickly uttered: “What? Yes, jolly good, indeed.”

Fiddling with his hands, he sighed and glared at the ceiling for a while.

“You’re not going to pay attention to me then?” He asked eventually, moving his head to look at the angel’s face. And just then did a small smile and a very smugly raised eyebrow grace that oh so innocent face.

“I guess not.”

Ohh, thought Crowley. Ohhhh. That was how he wanted to play? Foolish, foolish angel. No one could beat Crowley at a game of ‘You can’t get a reaction out of me anyway’. That was a challenge, the demon was more than apt to live up to.

A smile took over his brooding features as he nodded to himself, feigning peacefulness, his eyebrows rising just as smugly as the angels’ had. “Huh.”

Another page was turned – extremely slowly and extremely loudly. Crowley narrowed his eyes. The angel was still smirking ever so slightly, thinking himself clever. The smile on Crowley’s features grew.

“I see. Don’t let me disturb you then, I’ll just get a little more comfortable.” Lifting his upper-body, Crowley crawled on top of his angel, placing a hand on either side of his body, before lowering himself down. His head came to a rest on Aziraphale’s belly, the soft cotton of his pyjama smelling of fresh waterlilies. With a loud sigh, Crowley cuddled himself as close to the angel’s body as possible, his arms finding the space between the small of his back and the mattress to cross underneath and wrap him up in his embrace.

Aziraphale didn’t allow any of that to disturb him in the least. Behind his book, hidden from view, he bit his bottom-lip, concealing a little smirk. Mischief was in the air and he was quite prepared to see whatever Crowley would come up with to gain his attention. The letters on the pages turned into senseless repetitions of the same line, his attention not really remaining with his lecture.

Crowley was feeling particularly mischievous in that very moment and he was in a rather perfect position to act out his mean little plan. Moving his chin over Aziraphale’s tummy, he tightened his grip around him ever so slightly. Suddenly he buried his nose in the soft, angelic belly and inhaled deeply. “Ahh, you smell so good, angel.”

Aziraphale’s grip on his book grew a little stronger. Oh dear, maybe he was in more trouble than he’d expected. “Crowley,” he warned meaningfully, conveying unmistakeably with his tone of voice that the demon better not do what he appeared very much about to do.

“Yes?” The demon answered innocently, a playful grin settling on his face, as he started circling Aziraphale’s belly with the tip of his nose.

“I’m warning you.” The angel stated, shifting a little on the covers and lifting one hand from his book to hold up a reprimanding finger. His face stayed hidden behind the hardback copy which merely propelled Crowley’s grin to new dimensions of evil.

“I’m not doing anything.” He lied, placing a kiss in the middle of Aziraphale’s belly, before more kisses followed - to his sides, to his ribs, to his hips, all soft spaces that got Aziraphale to hold his breath and press his lips together tightly.

He tried not to react too strongly to the sensations spreading on his midriff, but truly, Crowley started to tickle him more and more and soon enough, Aziraphale was sure of it, it would become unbearable. He cleared his throat and shifted around some more, trying to distract himself with the sentences under his nose, but it was to no avail. He was about to lose their little game, but he tried to stay afloat for as long as he possibly could. Little titters of laughter tinted his voice when next he spoke. “You- you will regret this.”

“I sure hope I will.” Crowley answered, his smirk audible in every syllable and all hell broke loose when next he dipped his head to Aziraphale’s tummy and started growling into it. A loud screech left the angel’s lungs as he slipped out of his comfortable sitting position, starting to hit Crowley’s head with the next best weapon – which turned out to be the very enemy, the book itself.

“NOO!!” The sweetest squeals emerged from the bibliophile angel as Crowley continued to snarl, growl, gnaw and nibble all over the cotton covered ticklish belly at his mercy, paying no heed to the painful attempts at self-defence directed at his poor head. “DON’T DO THAT!!! OH CROWLEY YOU’LL-“ A peal of high-pitched laughter cut off Aziraphale’s line of thought as wily fingers started prodding his sides, adding to the unbearable sensations that overpowered his vessel.

“I’ll what? Tickle you until you pop? Maybe sooo.” Crowley snickered when Aziraphale finally tossed the dangerous book aside and started pushing and hitting at him with his hands instead, his scrunched up face decorated with the sweetest smile and his cheeks painted a very rosy colour.

“I BEG OF YOU!! STOP THIS!!”

Crowley merely smirked lazily, rubbing his face against Aziraphale’s ticklish sides and wiggling his fingers into easily accessible ribs on either side of his favourite body, never wishing for one second to stop.

“Can’t ignore me now, can you?”

Aziraphale arched his back as best he could and pushed his head into a bunch of pillows violently. They went flying, coming in handy and appearing a new wonderful weapon against Crowley’s ticklish attack. The demon started laughing when one of them came down next on his tousled hair, softer than the previous weapons, but nevertheless dangerous in the hands of the angel.

“Hey, stop hitting me!” He chuckled, removing one arm from underneath Aziraphale’s back to protect himself, trying to pull the pillow from the other’s grasp.

“NEVER YOU FOUL DEMONIC-“ Aziraphale choked on a new wave of laughter when Crowley’s hand disappeared underneath his arm, fingers hitting the centre of his armpit and making it impossible for him to keep from squeaking with laughter. The pillow was left harmless on the mattress next to the pair, as Aziraphale tried to curl up into a little ball.

Crowley followed his every move, expertly attacking whichever weak spot revealed itself next, until Aziraphale’s position on the bed had changed from upright to sideways.

“TRUTH, TRUTH!!” The angel squeaked when Crowley’s fingers were gently scribbling up his sides, kisses tickling him underneath his chin. “YOU GOT ME! I GIVE UP! I DO! CROWELY!!”

Chuckling softly, Crowley stilled his skilful fingers and removed his mouth from Aziraphale’s sensitive neck. The angel was panting, a big smile on his face and small titters still spilling from his lips.

Crowley had missed their tickle fights especially during these last two weeks of the angel’s insatiable hunger for books. Nothing was as sweet as his angel’s reaction to having Crowley kiss and tickle all over his middle. Though Aziraphale would probably not agree with him on this – he kept teasing that nothing could be sweeter than his demon flailing like a bug in  the water whenever Aziraphale’s fingers came near his hips or the backside of his ribs.

“You,” Aziraphale exclaimed when his breathing allowed it, “are in for quite the ordeal!”

“Oh, am I?” Crowley chuckled, pushing their noses together and planting a quick kiss on the angel’s lips. “Do you really think you’d have the singlest tidbit of a chance against me right now?”

Aziraphale threw his head back with another peal of laughter when Crowley’s fingers continued their ticklish way up his sides. “NO NO!! NOT A ONE!! CROWLEY PLEASE!!”

“Not a one.” Crowley repeated meaningfully and grabbed Aziraphale’s shoulder to roll them over, grinning happily up at his angel’s bright face. “I won. Now I demand-“ He stopped himself, too embarrassed to say it out loud.

“Cuddles?” Aziraphale offered, smirking knowingly.

Crowley growled  and hissed in response, but his blushed cheeks made it lack any vigour. “Yes, that!!” He spat out, before burying his face in Aziraphale’s neck and turning them over again.

Aziraphale smirked at the demon’s antics, wrapping his arms around him to pull him as close to his body as possible and allowing him to keep his face hidden at his neck. “You shall have your cuddles then, you wily snake.”

Crowley grabbed the blanket and pulled it around them, before letting out the loudest sigh of relief, happily enveloped in the hug he had wished for. Occasionally he allowed his snake tongue to slip out between his lips to tickle Aziraphale’s neck. But apart from that, their cuddle session was not interrupted for an impressive amount of time. And Crowley couldn’t have been happier.

[noirfos]

Episode 6 wahoo, I am ready for extreme pain rivalling and exceeding the end of OFMD

Battery operated candles! He learned fire safety, good job Mr. Fell

Aziraphale knows so much about human history and books and humanity, but he still understands so little about them

Bees

Crowley what is that walk 🤣

YES MAGGIE girlboss them

Oh no she invited them oh no Maggie oh no

Poor Eric

ANGEL CROWLEY HISTORY ANGST HEHEHEHUHUE "Throne or a dominion, or above"

Let's goooo magic heaven telephone circle!

That's the opposite of the Lil Nas X Call me by your Name video

He said "Nah"

Ohhh Crowley's snake tattoo in gold, gorgeous

Surely she's down to like 10 demons now after they all got discorporated?

The fire extinguishers stock 🤣 part of me is remembering the library of Alexandria comic and also 4dango's Haikaveh angst but I will just pretend those thoughts do not exist

"Jolly well hurry up about it" where's that gun you have a license for when you need it?

What if holy water fire extinguishers

This institutional problem bit is a metaphor for something but my after work brain cells are not enough to figure it out

The Metatron... The Master... I see you BBC

They're so surprised he has a desk lol

So Gabriel's plan was actually pretty decent then, he just didn't tag in the people who were part of it. And I'm still hanging onto Beelzebub having similar sentiments of dissatisfaction with the wishing for positive words of affirmation in hell

The Metatron went "ok good luck with Gabriel, his disappearance is your problem not mine"

IS HE UNLEASHING HIS TRUE FORM

Oh my god it's a ringlight frisbee

Rip Eric again

Crowley just falls into a leadership position, natural girlboss ✨ meanwhile his husband starts a war but we can ignore that

The way his smirk turns on hehehe

So everyone's an idiot then

I like how Nina and Maggie are just chilling in the background

The fly is bigger on the inside? Or is he going to eat it like All Might's hair

Eyyy Beel face explanation! Also Gabriel x Beelzebub canon we love to see it

So Beelzebub said they liked the song and then Gabe inexplicably made it play forever then?

Ah no it was intentional ;) He miracled the jukebox to play their song

When the fly showed up in the first episode I KNEW it would have an important role. I got faked out with Beel showing up in Crowley's car though.

"Silly silly angel" bro??? Have you been hanging out with Crowley too much

So all the leadership are traitors LMAO, also Crowley and Zira in the back watching their bosses do what they forbid them from doing all this time.

"I found something that mattered more to me than choosing sides" INEFFABLE HUSBANDS DID IT FIRST

Crowley's proud little smile watching Aziraphale handle the host of heaven and hell like kindergarteners :)

Oh my god Beelzbriel are so cringe, I love it

Ohhhh so Shax took Crowley's flat, that makes sense why she has all his mail now hahahaha

LOL is that The Metatron in the coffee line?

Crowley knows where everything in the bookshop goes and is putting it all back 😌

So Nina calls Maggie "Angel" now too, eh?

Muriel my baby I will protect you with all my heart

NO THEY'RE GONNA GET OFMDed

It's even worse they're gonna get Destieled aren't they

But Aziraphale wasn't THERE when any of the heaven people showed their true colours!!! Crowley sees heaven and hell for what they are but Aziraphale still believes in inherent good 😭

NOOO CROWLEY IS GOING TO GET CASTIELED DON'T DO THIS TO ME

Can I also just say, David Tennant's acting holy shit, the super subtle facial changes, the shaking throat, my GOD

All he's wanted was to go off together with his angel all this time!!!! AHHHH

the fuck do you mean NOTHING LASTS FOREVER? YOU'RE BETTER THAN THIS AZIRAPHALE COME ON

the put the glasses back on FUCK

You don't get it Aziraphale, you don't Understand 😭 He needs you too!! But it has to be on both your terms not just yours,,, meet him where he stands! It's been so long surely you know him better than this

NO NIGHTINGALES

oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god

yeah I saw the kiss I'm not ok

the fuck do you mean I FORGIVE YOU???!!! This hurts more than destiel and blackbonnet

LMAO Muriel in the window watching all this go down

what was he going to say before The Metatron walked out, was he going to change his mind??? What did he want to take with him, PLEASE

THE SECOND COMING? I've read the bible I'm raised religious I know what the fuck that means, Aziraphale PLEASE tell me you've read enough books to know what that means and that it's NOT GOOD for your little life and your husband and your book shop 😭

Oh ok his face fell. there is still time. change your mind, goddammit don't ignore Crowley he is looking at you disapprovingly for a reason, USE YOUR HEAD! please.

Crowley bared his heart just to get betrayed right after, this is his superhell

The Bentley with her sense of humour, girlie why are you playing Nightingale in Berkeley Square now of all times

THE SAD VIOLIN CREDITS DON'T DO THIS TO ME

Why did he smile at the end, what does it all mean,,, Amazon better pay their employees I need season 3