#don't judge me too hard ok i'm a baby writer and I posted it without editing

[silvermizuki]

I was gonna wait to post this until I ended up editing the errors I made in my writing but its been like two? weeks so I don’t think its happening lMAO 

ANYWAYS this is a scene that got stuck in my head from the blurb I wrote on ao3

[shokuhimaru]

Author-Chan: Hello! As promised in my last post I'm gonna do the Tanaka x Fem!Reader smut! Don't judge this story like please...I'm not the best writer but I'm gonna try my best! You and Tanaka have been dating for 1 year at this point too btw! And y'all also in college (ION MAKE STORIES OF MINORS LIKE FYM???) Without further ado please enjoy the story my stars~

Y/Ns POV:

I'm on another date with my boyfriend of 1 year! Yeah I know, 1 year, kinda a big deal (Author-Chan: sorry just hadda make her sassy at this part) we are at this fancy resturant and Tanaka won't even look at me! What. The. Fuck? I gently grab his hands "Ryu whats wrong? Your not yourself right now and I can tell." you move your hands to his face and lift it up "Ok fine I wanted to ask you something...We've been dating for a year now and well..." He was rambling at this point so I just let him do him until he says something that shocks me "I wanna have sex with you" Hold the fuck up, did he just say what I think he did? "Y/N? I totally get if you don't want to" you shake your head no at his worry "Its fine we can do it Ryu it would be something new right?" I smile slightly "Well it should be easy considering we both lost our virginity in what??? High school?" Omigod. I forgot I lied to him about losing my virginity. Look don't blame me for lying! I wanted him to be interested in me and well...Its not like hes a horny bastard...well he is but I just wanted him to be more interested! "Yeah totally its gonna be hella easy"

Oh. My. God. Tonights gonna be the night I lose my virginity.

Tanakas POV:

Say I'm wrong but just in case Y/N said yes to having sex I brought a condom with me. She is a (Your personality) I was suprised she even said yes with her being like that. I can tell shes getting more and more nervous the closer we get to our college dorms. "Y/n you alright? You seem hella nervous" she gives me a look that says 'well no shit sherlock' but also has a bit of softness in it. We reach my dorm first before hers but then she starts talking really fast "TANAKAIGOTTAGOTOMYDORMANDGETCHANGEDYOUKNOW?JUSTDONTWANNARUINMYDRESSAND-" It was a mix of so many words I barely realized what she said and just nodded my head yes to...whatever thing girl said. She rain to her dorm while I waited in mine. Shit. Am I really gonna do this with the girl I love most right now?? Fuck what if I actually get her pregnant, we don't want kids until later...

Y/ns POV:

I rushed to my dorm wanting to get away from Tanaka, He really wants to do this! I run back out my dorm to Tanakas and see him in nothing but his boxers. Shit I didn't think he'd be hard, this is gonna be a long ass night. "Babe? Are you sure you really wanna do this?" (Author-Chan: Remember everyone CONSENT IS COOL!!!) of course I wanna do this but I'm nervous. "No I don't wanna do this Ryu" I say with loads of sarcasm slightly smirking. Oh boy that did not help me, he tackled me on the bed and started kissing me. He licked my bottom lip as if he was asking to enter but I obviously denied well that was even worse because he harshly grabbed my boobs. That made me moan out in sorta pain but it felt good! He took that as a chance and starts exploring my mouth. We end up fighting for dominace and no surprise he wins! He ends up taking my top off and just looks at me "Damn no bra baby? I guess you were prepared for this huh~" he says with lust in his voice, although I knew he would do something like this I couldn't help but blush. He grabs my boob and starts sucking it. "R-Ryu~" I didn't even realize that I said that but he saw that as me slowly falling under his touch. He stops sucking and decided to place kisses all over my torso. "Tanaka what are you doing" I can't help but giggle LOOK IT TICKLES OK!!! He slowly makes his way down to my crotch and pulls down my pants. He looks at my 😺for a minute then smirks. "Babyyy I'm hungry" He whines "Well then I can just order t- A-ahh~" I moan mid sentence because he starts eating me out. "You taste delicious you know?" H-hes such an asshole! "G-get off of me you idiot~" I can barely even say. "Fine but your gonna need to fix MY problem" I stare down. Shit I'm fucked. "T-tanaka wait! I need to get somethin off my chest!" I blurt out "Oh if its me then sorry..well I'm not that sorry your kinda comfortable." I roll my eyes at that remark. "I never had sex before. Im sorry for lying" I look away with guilt but Tanaka doesn't care "Babe then we can stop I don't wanna do something you dont feel comfortable with." I shake my head no "I would rather you be my first time then anyone else please keep going..." he looks shocked then just shrugs, as he takes off his boxers my eyes widen "Goddamn..." you mumble not even realizing it. "Oh? Like whatcha see baby~~~???" I glare at him then smile a bit "Oh why would I? I have no reason to." That made him mad and he pounded into me with no warning. "Sorry but you need to be punished for that" F-fuck hes big...I don't think I'll last long. "Ryu this- your- so...big..." I say without hesitation, he starts going faster and all I can do is moan under him. "Say my name Y/N~~~" Obviously I use a pet name but he only goes faster. "No I mean my real name my full name I wanna hear you moan while saying it~" Fuck hes so stubborn but I want this to get over with! "R-ryu-n A-ahh~ shit slow down at least!" I can barely finish his name but I can feel him slowing but very little "Ryuno- fuck I can't do it please don't make me say it please!" He rolls his eyes but he says okay. "First we both gotta cum though okay?" I agreed with him and he started going at an insane speed. "F-fuck Tanaka im gonna-" you got cut off with you milking his 🍆 then not long after you he cums too. "Your on the pill right Y/N?" Did he really just ask this AFTER we did what we did? "I don't think so, no" you pant. "Well I mean I wouldn't mind a mini version of m-" tanaka starts "Nope nuh uh I'll pop a plan B before than and if that doesn't work I'm getting an abortion hell no I'm not doing that" He laughs at what I say "I'll clean us up just you rest okay?" you nod and slowly drift off to sleep

~bounus~

"You know we don't have to actually KEEP the kid I mean we could give it up for adoption" Tanaka really wants a kid on this earth all of a sudden? "Yeah no I already have my appointment so mini you is gone! Say bye bye Tanaka!!! Maybe in a few years but not now." He thinks I'm joking but my face is dead serious. "Fine I'll wait those few years."

~The End~

Author-Chan: I don't write many smuts so work with me I tried but give me some advice and don't be mean about this shit. I tried my best and thats all that matters! Follow my Wattpad it has all my stories on there right after! Its MiyakosMiracles

[valkerymillenia]

Umbrella Academy

season 2, episode 8

Once again- live blogging my thoughts and reactions in one post to avoid spamming.

So this is how the FBI gets their hands on Vanya, huh? Seems most fan theories were wrong.

Oh, Sissy's last name is Cooper!

I did wonder about that -how did remember her name despite forgetting everything else? If she knew her name then she should have been able to remember other little fragments.

Of course the feds focus on the fact that her name is Russian. Cold war bullshit. I guess they think she's a spy or since Russian sleeper soldier or something.

"I'm not Russian" -you kinda are though 😅 Tatiana was Russian and gave birth to you in Moscow sooo...

DID VANYA JUST SPEAK RUSSIAN?!

Is that one of the 7 languages that Reggie all the siblings or....? Does it... Does it have something to do with her powers or her birth place?

"simple-minded boy"? FUCK YOU.😠

"communist threat" there it is 🙄

Oh no, she's losing her cool. Here come the powers... I keep wondering how she does that 'sucking the life' out of someone thing. 🤔

That's a lot of puke.

Poor Five, he's starting to crack under the stress.

Why is Ben gagging? He's dead, he shouldn't be able to feel or smell the puke.

Loving Robert's real curls starting to show.

"I regret nothing" -hmm.... Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of.

"there's a giant dead white boy on my couch" 😆

"Oh, I see. It's gonna be one of those kind of nights, huh? So are we burning or burying?" -this is why I love Klaus! He doesn't even flinch, he doesn't care what happened, he doesn't ask, he just immediately decides that he's going to help his sister get rid of a dead body like it's the most natural thing in the world.

Although, it would be interesting if Klaus actual saw the Swede ghosts too. I just want Klaus to be seeing ghosts everywhere again, ok? I want that struggle from season 1 to be brought back and not swept under the rug for plot convenience. As a writer, if you make something an important character trait, you stick with it and they haven't done that with Klaus, they are half-assing his struggle with his powers.

It's the Swede really going to...? Oh good, saved by the cat.

Oh! So that's what "lavender" means! I was right, it was the perfume, it was probably obvious but I'm a little dumb.

Ah! Lila is trying to hire Diego for the Commission???

Diego is so confused.

"colorful history" sounds so wrong and sexual 😣

Diego is so full of bullshit. His loyalties absolutely lie with his family, he's just too defensive to admit it.

Reginald FRAMED Pogo's family drawing? So he's a better dad to the chimp than his own kids, huh?

THE TELEVATOR!!!!!!! PLANS FOR THE TELEVATOR!!!! I love comic references, please tell me we'll see a real televator in the show!

So Reggie really is planning something about JFK...

"are you involved in something nefarious?" "Quite often. Did you have something more specific in mind?" -at least he owns it 😆

"shaggy man" -ah! Poor Diego!

Reggie really loves this Grace, huh? But she has a point.

Five is losing it a bit, huh?

The baby powder 🤣

"I have to find myself" -RIGHT! I was wondering when this would come up! Old!Five was there for the JFK thing so Five just has to find his old self and his briefcase in order to correct all this mess. More comic references!

"arguably the most dangerous assassin in the time-space continuum" -DAMN RIGHT 💯

"paradox psychosis" 🤣I know it's supposed to be super serious but the symptoms are so funny...

"a spotter? What is that? Like a wingman?" 😆 This parallels that "Body man? What's that? Like a masseuse?" line in s02e02 where Five is the confused one.

Five, do you really think your brother can stop you if you spiral? Because I don't.

Luther doesn't have a great attention span, does he?

Harlan's drawing is interesting... I get a feeling it's important.

Shit, they are torturing Vanya!! This is so bad!

LSD? LSD?????? No, that's a terrible idea with her powers!!!

Eeeewwwww the eyeballs! 👁️

That's a hell of a bad trip... The way the music makes with the visuals reminds me of my synesthesia though.

Oh! So this is where the scene of all the adult siblings in the Academy uniforms is from!!! (I remember someone saying it was Diego dreaming of having a drugged hallucination in the asylum, they were pretty close! It's Vanya drugged by the FBI instead!)

"I get you" -that is not the face of a person that gets this at all, Luther!

"Don't freak out." -like that ever worked 😆

Lila trying to have her cake and eat it too with her mom and Diego.

That informational video 🤣🤣🤣

Free coffee! Weekly donuts* (*fees apply)! Wow, so tempting 😒

"whatever your skill, education, or comfort level with moral ambiguity (...)" 😆

Are the Fives just having a staring contest? 🤣🤣

Ah! How can Five be bitchy and aggressive to HIMSELF 😆

"all those years on the apocalypse, we never stopped working about our family." -why does Luther look so damn surprised to hear this?? Why the hell does he think Five is doing so this for?!

Wow, Five is really bitter about his body, isn't he? He's making old!Five so nervous 😅

Oops, there's stage 4 for old!Five!

And there's stage 3 as well and stages 5 and 6 for little!Five.

I get a feeling Five doesn't really have the accurate calculations, he's just lying and using the originals.

"I don't trust him!" -he's... He's you...14 days ago! How do you not trust yourself?

"but he's you" "exactly" 🤣🤣🤣

I'm so afraid how what Diego is going to do. I get a feeling hell fuck up trying to be a misguided hero again...

"I'm Diego. I have a knife." 😆

"it's very shiny" 🤣

So Diego is a legend, huh? 😏

"there's been a coup d'etat" "what's that? Cadillac?" -don't play dumb, Diego, I don't believe for a single second that you don't know what a coup is.

So the new apocalypse WAS Vanya's fault but by proxy (actually more the FBI's fault), she was just a small domino. So literally the only one that didn't actively do anything to impact the timeline ends up being the one doing the most damage (again)? PLOT TWIST!

Oh no, DON'T GET ANY IDEAS ABOUT YOUR SISTER, DIEGO! YOU SAW HOW BADLY THAT ENDED LAST TIME!

No, I refuse to believe "she will always be the bomb" 😠😠😠😠

LOL, hi, Dot!

NO! LUTHER, YOU MORON! DON'T GIVE HIM ALL THAT INFO! YOU'LL CHANGE EVERYTHING AND CEASE TO EXIST!!!

These dumb siblings exhaust me

"little jerk-off" -why are you insulting yourself, you weirdo? 😆

Old!Five with all the PP symptoms and yet he says he never felt better in his life 🤣

"you're getting paranoid" -you both are, and sweaty, itchy and gassy. All that's missing is the homicidal rage at this point 😅

Vanya's hallucination shows us a twisted paranoid view she has of her siblings and it's very interesting:

-Ben is protective, defends her, he can do no harm, probably because he died young so nostalgia blurs her memory of him

-Allison defends her but is also arrogant and condescending, speaking as if she's implying that Vanya is weak, probably because Vanya feels that Allison is perfect and has an inferiority complex

-Luther is just as arrogant and looks down her, calling her lazy, but does so without malice (more mockery than anger)

-Klaus is accusing and suspicious but still on the fence and excitable, probably reflecting Vanya's own doubts and how she herself sees Klaus

-Five just stares, judging and silent but unable to look away, probably because she trusts him but she also doesn't know him, there's the same nostalgia effect as Ben but because Five came back (to stop her) the inferiority and fear of judgement is still there

-Diego is completely different, awkward and detached, this one is the most interesting because he's one of the people that was most vocal and mean against her in season 1 but apparently she sees a kindred spirit in him to an extent, either that or she fears she means nothing to him

Maybe I'm overanalyzing again...

I totally predicted the dishes would be brains but it's still gross.

Ew, the chewing... 😫 It's giving me the creeps.

Why is she seeing Harlan's drawing? She was gone already when he made that particular drawing (I knew it would be important), is she connected to him now??

And how does she remember her own birth??

Holy shit, Harlan is feeling Vanya's pain!!!😲😲😲

"why are people so much heavier when they're dead?" "You got a lot of practice at this?" 😅

Ben and Klaus conversation actually makes me feel a bit better about the possession but it makes no sense at all 🤣

Poor Ray keeps meeting in-laws in the weirdest situations 🤣🤣🤣🤣 his face! 🤝

Ray is having a nervous breakdown 😣 poor guy...

The moment Lila notices Diego is missing, the intercom chimes "Loyalty isn't a choice, it's a lifestyle" and if that isn't foreshadowing for Lila choosing sides then I don't know what is.

This is a really painful way for Vanya to recover her memories but it's so well done!

Holy shit... 😳

Klaus asking the real question here. She's being tortured, Klaus, go help!!!

HOLY SHIT! HARLAN HAS VANYA'S POWERS NOW?!

No, no, no,no, no, no nononononono! This is so bad! A child with a disorder that makes emotions hard to regulate suddenly having an apocalyptic level of power that connects directly to emotion is just a recipe for disaster!