#don't mind me just reposting old works from twitter to here

[ryoplicaisherenow]

Concert Gao Chong lives rent free in my head to this day

[creampie-capital]

║The Demon Childhood Friend║║━ Pt. 1 ━║

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

Male Monster x Fem! Reader Word count║12,600

The Devil May Lick Me Masterlist ━━━➤ 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥 𝐌𝐚𝐲 𝐋𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐌𝐞

↳.·:*¨༺𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧༻¨*:·.

↳║The Demon Childhood Friend║║━ Pt. 2 ━║ - in development

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

Photo Reference Cred ━━━➤ 9taeX on X (Twitter)

Do not steal, copy, or repost anywhere. My work is currently on both CREAMPIE_CAPITAL on wattpad and Imtropicalbaby on Quotev. If posted on another account or website, please report and notify me immediately.

Now onto the story :)

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

(Y/n) - Six years old

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

"Hey! Why are you sitting there all alone?" 

The movement of your legs stalled on the swing as you peered up through your hair. You hadn't expected two boys to appear in front of you like a flash of lightning. 

One of them had leaned down while tilting his head of light bubblegum pink hair. It was long, pulled into a high ponytail with bangs that split in the middle over his pale forehead. He observed your small stature sitting on the swing with otherworldy optics like he held the ocean in his iris. 

His eyes were doe-like and hooded, gracing him with a curious, youthful face that probably won over the hearts of young and old women. Lastly, before you diverted your attention away, you observed the golden halo hovering above his head.

The one beside him was a lot shorter and appeared apathetic as if he were annoyed to be here at the park. He had rather dark, woolly blond hair with nice curls that were longer by the back of his head. Even as he kept his small body at an angle, looking off into the distance, you were still able to see the vibrant scarlet colors in his iris'. 

Small angled eyes with long dark lashes could have had him mistaken for female if it were not for his facial features or body. Interestingly enough, unlike his counterpart, a pair of crystal-like horns sprouted from the top of his head. 

They were small, too, like little baby horns of a goat. It would be blind of you not to mention their set of wings, one a soft fluff of white feathers hidden beneath a long-sleeved shirt. The other, dark, leather in texture and featherless, curled inwards behind his back.

"Mom and Dad were arguing again." You murmur while dropping your small hands that held onto the chain on top of your lap. 

The angel boy raised his brow as his small lips formed into an o-shape. "Ah! You're the new girl that just moved in next to mine!" He stuck out his hand and offered it as he grinned boyishly. "I'm Javan, and this is my bestfriend Zagan. He also lives just down the street." 

You stared at his rather thin fingers for a moment before reaching for it with a bleak expression. Yet once your skin touched him, your entire stomach became a ball of heated lava, and the cynical emotions running rampant in your young mind became non-existent. 

The dark thoughts omitted from your mentality...it all became so clear. 

"What's your name?" Javan questioned as he held your hand firmly while that bright grin remained on his face. 

You had to swallow thickly before you could answer. "(Y/n)...I'm (Y/n)." 

"Nice to meet you!" He beamed before looking over at the demon boy. "Why don't we include (Y/n) into the group!? You know we kids need to stick together!" 

Zagan glanced at you for a moment before sighing and crossing his arms over this sweater. He didn't speak; probably didn't want another person to come into their already-established friendship and steal his best friend. 

It was understandable. 

"Oh, Zagan agrees! Then help me push her!" Before you could reply, Javan and Zagan appeared behind you and began pushing your back on the swing. 

It didn't take long for you to start moving. Creaking reverberated around the park as the setting sun painted the sky with molten gold. 

The wind rushing past your ear felt exhilarating, your heart skipping a beat as the sensation of your stomach dropping provoked tingling sensations to surge through your body. 

You had never gotten so high, so high that you can touch the clouds. It felt like you could finally do it... as if you could finally flutter away on a pair of wings. 

Weightless, feather-like, you could fly away anywhere but here. 

One of your arms stuck out to the dimming sky. You wanted to grasp that warmness and hold it close to your heart, never to let it go ever again.

And for a moment, it felt like you were doing it. Until the air swooshed past your ear, and your body was descending swiftly. 

"(Y/n)!"

The darkness of night took over as the lamps flashed with murky color. 

And the chill ate you alive until you were swathed in that same lava-like heat from before. Your eyes drifted from the sky to Javan's face, who held you firmly.

His wings had torn from his clothes to beat in the air as he slowly descended until he kneeled and sat you down on the tire chips. 

"Are you okay?" He questioned you, face full of worry, ocean blue eyes filled with dread. 

The words felt caught in your throat. 

A burning sensation sprouted in your chest, and it took everything in you not to cry. But when Zagan ambled over to kneel on the other side of your figure and lightly touched your shoulder, you felt overwhelmed. 

So you cried and bawled and wailed so hard that you were choking on air. Your face burned, the heat on your cheeks and ears hot like the burner on the stove. 

Wet tears fell as though they were never-ending, wetting your face and drenching your top. An ache so tense and strained gripped at your heart, squeezing to where you felt lightheaded. 

Zagan and Javan hadn't said a word as they kneeled by your side and let you cry your heart out. 

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

(Y/n) - Ten years old

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

A tap resonated from your window as you hid beneath your comforter, reading the superhero comic book with a rather bulky flashlight. 

You had ignored it, mouthing the words on printed paper to yourself to practice your pronunciation. Turning the page, your lips parted to speak, and yet another tap at your window startled your movement. 

For a moment, you sat in silence, hearing it again before thrusting the blanket overhead. It was hot and stuffy under the covering that once you were out, the chilly breeze of the central air rose goosebumps over your skin. 

You nearly tripped, scooting off your bed and running over to your window. Kneeling over the cushioned bench, you forced it open to stick your head out. 

Zagan and Javan hovered in the air of your second-story house with their wings. They've grown a lot since you first met them; well, the pink-haired one grew the most.

He grew taller, his limbs longer, and his hair, tied in a high ponytail, reached the small of his back. His halo now pulsated brightly with the pure white aileron's lengthier, far longer than the length of a car.

Zagan, on the other hand, remained the shortest, shorter than you. He still had a lot of baby fat on his cheeks that were framed by his golden curls that grew longer, reaching his shoulders. Though, if something had grown, it had to have been his leathery bat-like wings that extended to such a length that you were surprised it was not getting stuck in the tree branches. 

"Baby girl!" The angel boy greeted as he smiled brightly and fluttered his white feathered wings.

That nickname used to be an insult because of how you cried your eyes out when they first met you. But then they both casually referred to you by it since you liked to call them Angel Boy and Demon Boy. 

When they call you it, you swear all your worries melt away, and you become a small little jewel that they cherish like a national treasure. 

You felt special and valued, adored by people who didn't see fault in your every move.

Instead of responding back joyfully as you usually would, you crossed your arms and turned the other way. "I'm not talking to you two! Not after you guys got me grounded!" Your young adolescent voice expresses out. 

The demon boy frowns while he twiddles his fingers behind his back with his batty aileron's twitching.

J had clicked his tongue and shrugged rather nonchalantly in his grey windbreaker. "You can't blame us forever, Baby! You were the one that wanted to fly to the satellite tower-" 

You flung your head towards the angel while sneering. "Yeah, but you both were the ones that flew into the camera with the news reporter! When my dad saw it, he flipped and took away all my privileges! That's why I'm still grounded after three months!" Your response only spurs the young boy to rub the back of his neck sheepishly. 

He could only grin and hope that bright smile he knew you loved would cheer you up. It was irritable how right he was. Although you were still upset, you wavered without even a fight. 

Javan was just someone you couldn't be mad at, and Zagan as well. Not when the demon looked like he would faint when you would ignore him and vice versa for you with the angel. 

"You guys are so lucky." You whine while sitting down on your bench and resting one of your arms on the windowsill. "Your parents never ground either of you."

The angel quirks a lopsided grin as he wags one of his fingers. "You can't get in trouble if they don't know~" His teasing remark spurs you to flick his forehead harshly. 

He winces slightly while you train your attention to the ends of your hair. "Easy for you to say when your parents don't monitor everything you do like a hawk. They only just recently allowed me to be in my room by myself during the day..." 

Zagan's scarlet red eyes flicker upwards to meet your gaze. "Sorry..." He whispers so softly that you almost miss it over the loud wooshing of the wind due to their flapping wings. 

You parted your lips to speak, yet it was interrupted by a voice. "(Y/n)! Who are you talking to when you're grounded!?" 

It was your father, and you could hear his heavy footsteps already stalking up the stairs. 

"Crap!" Javan groans. The angel boy flew over to kiss your forehead before waving goodbye and flying over to his house next door. 

You watched him glide so effortlessly away as the warmth on the spot he touched was mind-numbing and addicting. 

Z glanced down at the ground for a second before shuffling for something in his pants pocket. Just as the footsteps arrived at your door, he placed something in the palm of your hand and whispered softly against your ear. 

"I thought of you." 

His soft, boyish voice rose the hair on the back of your neck. 

The door squeaked open, and Z was gone like a flash of lightning. "Who said you could have your window open? Close it now." His voice is grating, pungent with authority as the man of the house. 

"Yes, Dad." You responded immediately and slammed it shut. Your blood is running cold, a type of chill that burns bitterly.

His presence lingers, staring at the back of your head like you are little prey unable to escape its trap. Then there are his eyes, those cold, lifeless eyes.

You never liked seeing those words in the books. Cold...Lifeless...how can one look like that? But as you grew older, you became aware. 

Nothing behind the eyes, empty and void of basic compassion. Or maybe he's only like that with you. Fathers know best for their daughters, right?

"Do you want more privileges to be taken away?" He questioned, which spurred you to immediately shake your head, gaze still situated on the wooden floor. "Should it be your bed or your books next?" 

"N-No, please." Your voice was feeble, powerless like an injured animal. "I'm sorry." 

His bulky body leans against the door frame while his arms crossed over his chest, and remains in silence. He lets the stillness unnerve you, the unknown of what is to come to scare you into compliance. 

So he just stood there while you sat on the bench, cornered and head bowed. 

The silence is so deafening. No, it's suffocating. As though quietness manifested into hands to grip your little neck and squeeze-

"Dad, the show's back on!" Your younger brother's voice cuts through the tension and gains the older man's attention. 

He huffs audibly and finally speaks. "When I say you're grounded, that means you're being punished for disobeying." The man retorts. "Don't piss me off again." And with that, he grasps the door handle and slams it shut. 

A hanging frame on the door tumbles from the force, with the walls of your room rattling. You don't move for a second, remaining stagnant to cease the quivering in your lips. 

"I hate you." It seethes from your lips before you rub your eyes free of a burning sensation. 

Now that you were alone, you allowed yourself to relax and unclench your fingers over the object Zagan had given you. What you come to see is a silver necklace with a small pendant. It's a pair of wings, silver and shiny, with something engraved on the smooth backside. 

'My Favorite Girl'

How gorgeous. It brought a smile to your face as you ran your finger over the present. The metal and jewels felt cool to the touch. 

You swiftly ran over to your vanity and chained the necklace around your throat like your life depended on it. 

Often, it felt as though Zagan was annoyed with you, rarely ever speaking while looking disinterested. But sometimes...sometimes, he did things that brought a smile to your face. 

Just like now. 

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

(Y/n) - Fourteen years old

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

Javan settled down in the seat next to you as he placed one of his arms around the back of your neck. Your gaze rose from the school Chromebook while you smiled at the male. 

The more he ages, the more he continues to grow. His limbs became lengthy, his pink bubblegum hair down to his knees, and all the youthful fat in his face graced him with a prominent jawline and hollowed cheekbones.

"Hey, you. I thought Mr. Voitier was going to keep you after class for not paying attention." You tease while reaching for an apple on your tray. 

It's lunchtime during eighth grade; you had sat in the courtyard attempting to fix homework you made a mistake on before it was due. 

The angel winks while wagging a finger. "Not some good 'ol persuasion couldn't help with." He states before sticking out his tongue. 

You scoffed, pinching his tongue before wiping the saliva on a napkin. "Threatening to tell the school that he's being biased because he's a demon isn't going to work forever. Eventually, he's going to lose his patience." 

J merely waves a hand, dismissing your words before he leans back in his seat. His ocean eyes peer over to your screen, which provokes a groan. 

"Sh*t. I didn't even know that was homework." 

"How did you not know? It literally says the due date at the top." 

The angel shrugs, and you roll your eyes. "This cannot be a habit, you know." His gaze is burning against the side of your face, provoking little tingles to run up your spine. "Fine...Fine, you can copy." Once you spoke, he beamed so brightly that his halo pulsated almost blindly. 

He's like the sun that you could have in your arms. 

"You're a lifesaver! Mom would kick my a** if I got anything below an A." He expressed with his white wings fluttering behind his back. 

He's so cute. 

"Yeah, yeah. If you would just stop being lazy and forgetful, you'd never have to worry." As you return your gaze to the Chromebook, you catch a glimpse of dark wings and light hair.

Blinking, you tilt the screen down as you hone in on the background. It was Zagan, for sure.  

You actually have not seen him around for a while now. He's always busy or off doing his own thing. Your parents do not trust you enough to have a phone, so it is not like you can just message him. 

Often, you do see him around his house down the street, but in school, it's like he's a ghost. 

Matching your sight, Javan stands up while unfortunately removing his arm from your shoulders. "Yo! Z, bud!" 

Zagan's movement froze as he removed his earbuds and directed his attention to the wall of windows. 

The demon boy was still the same as when he was years ago—chubby cheeks, short height, stick-like limbs, baby crystal horns, with his shaggy curly blond hair reaching his shoulders. 

What really changed was his wings, which were just massive, even longer than Javan's. He had to have it folded behind his back and buckled with a binding due to how difficult it was for him to keep the huge ailerons closed. 

It must hurt.

The male beside you waves his hand over, and at first, it appears as though the other person in the trio looks hesitant. 

But after a moment, he shifted his path and opened the doors to enter the courtyard. His scarlet horns glimmered like a gleaming diamond under the sun. 

Javan and Zagan share a quick handshake before he nods over to acknowledge your presence. 

"Whatchya been up to, man? We barely see you anymore." The angel starts as he returns to sit down next to you. 

His right hand found its place on your thigh, and you swore your heart nearly lurched out of your stomach. The heat of his skin that you could feel through your clothes was swathing you in a bubble of delight. 

It was addicting and comforting and had shot tingles all across your abdomen. 

The demon boy swallowed rather audibly as he turned his head away. "Just been busy." He states, his voice slightly cracking. 

Hmm, why wasn't he telling you two about it? You all shared everything with each other. 

"I get it, man. Just don't forget about us. We've been friends for way too long just to grow apart." Javan expressed, and you nodded your head in agreement. 

"We are here for you, Z." His scarlet eyes fling down to meet your gaze. "With whatever's going on, we'll listen. We'll support you through anything. That's what friends are for." 

He swallows thickly again, his one hand hanging by his side twitching before curling into a fist that he hid in the pocket of his sweatshirt. "Yeah, I know. Thanks for that." His phone abruptly vibrates, and he snatches it swiftly, reading something on the screen with hard eyes before sighing. "I gotta go." 

Before either of you can tell him goodbye, he was trekking back into the school with his tied wings beating against the binding. 

A scowl laces your lips as you slouch in your seat. "I hope he's okay." You murmur, which prompts the angel to squeeze his hand on your leg. 

Your fingers twitch as you train your attention to meet his bright eyes. "He's fine. You know he's just always been moody." The pink-haired being expresses while reaching for his own phone.

Either on instinct or tendency, your dominant hand rose to graze over the winged pendant beneath your blouse. 

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

Knocking audibly on the door, you could hear courses of children screaming and laughing with objects falling to the ground. 

It took a moment for the front door to be opened, and you were welcomed by the sight of Jahi, Zagan's mother. 

She's a beautiful woman, blessed with beautiful features, a small mole on her chin, and small, sharp cat-like eyes with long lashes. You could see where Zagan got his hair from, his mother sprouting bright golden curls that reached her hips. 

Her wings were something else, still leather-like but marked with swirling scarlet red lines that seemed to glow.

There was a small toddler hanging off her shoulder with one on top of her head and another babbling in her arms.

"Hi, Aunty!" You greet and grip the straps of your backpack. "Is Zagan home?"

"Baby!" She gushes down at you from her tall height while using the childhood nickname the two boys in your trio used. "It's been a while since you've been over. Everything alright?" 

For a moment, you feel the inner corner of your eyes tense and burn, but you push it down to smile and nod your head. "Yes, Aunty! Eighth grade is just so busy." 

Jahi nods before she catches one of her kids that fell from her head without even looking. "I understand. Don't be afraid to come over more often, even if it's just for dinner. Come in; Zagan's down in his room." 

You bowed slightly before entering her large home and immediately removed your shoes. Two other kids covered in paint ran past swiftly while knocking over a vase. 

Aunty Jahi practically teleported over and caught the porcelain object with one of her wings. "It looks like the kiddos are rather active today." You jest while helping her to put the vessel back on the stand. 

"No kidding." She murmurs while leading you over to the kitchen. Easily, she holds two of the tykes in one arm as she rummages through the refrigerator before pulling out a bowl of fruit. "Have a snack. I'll be making dinner soon." 

A lopsided grin forms on your lips from the habit you've always had. Every time you all used to come over, the older demon woman had snacks for you to eat. 

Whether it be fruit, candy, or pastries. Carefully, you took the bowl and nodded. "Okay, Aunty. I'll see you in a bit." 

She waved you away as you strode through the home like second nature. The residence was big, bigger than all the houses in the neighborhood. 

It made sense with all the children in the Lamia household—at least seven children, with Zagan being the oldest. He likes to say that he can't stand his siblings, but he's cared for them like a third parent. 

He'll say he hates them, but you've never seen someone who'd go to the ends of the world to find a cure when his brothers and sisters have just a cold. 

Yeah, the demon boy goes on and on about wanting to move away, but you both know he'd worry himself sick about the other kids.

Watching your footing, you strolled downstairs to the basement, where you passed one of Z's younger brothers by a year reading on the couch in the common area. 

They were rather similar looking, except he was taller, a little more aged in the face, and his horns had grown to curl back over his ears. 

If you weren't family friends, you would have guessed the second and third oldest had come before Zagan because of how fast they grow...it's something Zagan's very insecure about.

"Hey, Alastor." You greet him as you pass.

He peers up for a second before returning to his book. "Hey, (Y/n)." 

Down the hallway, the last door at the end, you approach unhurriedly before knocking loudly. You wait for a response, and once you get a quiet 'what,' you open it. 

Zagan's changed into a pair of sweats with a matching dark sweater. His attention is on the gaming computer as he effortlessly clicks the buttons on his controller without even looking. 

Once his gaze flickers over to you for a moment, he's startled and bangs his knee against the desk. "F*ck..." He curses under his breath as he yanks the headphones off his head.

You hold in a giggle and step in fully to close the door behind your figure. 

"What are you doing here?" He snaps, practically hissing it out as he slides out from the desk to rub his knees. 

"Why else?" You retort, dropping your bag against the wall to settle on his wide bed. "I miss you and came to check in because it feels like you're ignoring us." 

Zagan frowns at your words; his gaze focuses on his legs for a second before he returns them to his screen. "You should have just texted-" 

"I don't have a phone, remember." 

He's silenced as you begin plopping the fruits into your mouth and snacking on them as if you had been starving. 

The demon boy returned to his game, placing back on his headphones but keeping one earpad off so he could hear if you spoke. 

Indulging in the comfortable ambiance of his button clicking and the muffled screaming of his siblings upstairs, you watched him play silently. 

Not long after, you grasped your bag and took out a folder with homework that needed to be completed. You lay on your stomach, kicking your legs back and forth while reaching for fruit in the bowl. 

When it came to spending time with Zagan, you both enjoyed doing your own thing in each other's presence. And considering that the demon boy didn't often speak either, you did most of the talking as he either nodded along to what you were saying or grunted in response. 

It was comforting and something you've missed. For a while now, there felt to be this distance growing, like he were on the other side of the bridge with the path crumbling apart. 

You didn't want to lose him. 

"Where's Javan? Thought you'd be with him." He abruptly speaks up, cutting off the neutral silence. 

"Javan had something to do with the Angel community." You state while turning over the packet to the next page. "Something about reconnecting with their beliefs or whatever." 

Although you do not see, the demon nodded his head while saving his game. He removed his headphones to hang them on his monitor before turning his gaming chair to face your figure lying on his bed. 

Feeling his gaze, you peered up while smiling. "Hey, there, Demon Boy. I missed you." 

Zagan swallowed thickly at your words, his throat visibly bobbing as he gripped the rest of his seat tightly. You didn't notice earlier, but beneath his vibrant eyes were dark undercircles.

Had he not been sleeping well? He was always the last one to fall asleep and the first one up during sleepovers. 

Even Jahi used to take him to the hospital for chronic insomnia, and they thought it was resolved. Guess not. 

"Do you-" 

"I know that you are in love with Javan." 

You choked on a bite of fruit, a stinging sensation sprouting in the back of your throat as you sat up to cough. "W-What?! No! What are you even talkin' about?" Zagan's expression was not pleased. "Was it...Was it really that obvious?" 

He scoffed while nodding and leaning back in his seat. 

Groaning, you ran a hand through your hair while keeping your eyes down. It felt difficult at that moment to meet his gaze. "I didn't want anyone to know. I don't want anything to ruin our friendship, you know? We're already becoming distant." 

The embarrassment was eating you alive. 

"Baby Girl..." It's been years since he has called your name, even longer since you've heard him use that nickname. It makes shivers run up your spine as a tingling in your abdomen flutters. "You know that Javan's not really..." He stops himself from speaking anymore as if he couldn't find the words. "Javan's not really who you think he is. Don't you see fast he switches up when you're around?"

Raising a brow, you shook your head. "Actually, no, I don't. What do you mean by that?"

He respired a heavy breath, appearing unsure and doubtful as he shifted in his seat. "F*ckin' A... Listen, you might think you know Javan, but you really don't. He's not...He's not a good person-" 

"What are you talking about!" You interjected, feeling heat flush through your body and a wave of vertigo. "I've known him since forever. I know him. Why are you talking down on our friend like that?" 

His constrained wings twitched, pushing against the binding that had the straps whine. He attempted to speak, his lips parting, but only wheezes escaped. 

Cursing again, his thin, bony fingers gripped tightly onto the armrest as his right leg began to bounce. "Please, if you value our friendship, just listen to me." 

Oh, how you wanted to walk away right there, but what he said halted you in your spot. Of course, you valued your friendship with him; he was your best friend. 

He was your family. 

"Baby, Javan knows you like him. Everyone knows." Your face was burning in embarrassment; it felt so humiliating for some reason. "He doesn't feel the same. H-He's rather ashamed and disgusted-" 

"You're lying!" It was practically a scream as you shot to your feet off the bed. "Javan would never say that!" The inner corner of your eyes stung as tears glazed over the conjunctiva. "He's not like that! You're just envious that he's always been better than you!" 

Due to your words, the rage boiling your blood had now transferred over to the demon in front of you. Zagan stood up almost dangerously slow, like a predatory. "You think that's why I'm envious..." He nearly snarled while his canines visibly grew longer and sharper. "I don't give a flying f*ck that he's taller, bigger, smarter. He could be better than me in a hundred more ways, but it wouldn't even come close to why I'm envious of that b*stard." 

Seething hot tears trailed down your face, seeping down your chin to wetten your throat. You didn't know how to feel, what exactly to feel. 

All your emotions were taken for a spin: disoriented, puzzled, dumb-struck. Who is telling the truth? Who is right? 

They both are your best friend, the people closest to your heart that makes your days brighter and nights calmer. 

But how do you react when the one you're utterly in love with isn't who you thought he was? Or when the other confronts you with what could be the truth...but also a lie? 

"Please, Z. Just...just tell me that you didn't mean it, and I'll forget-" 

The straps containing his massive wings had snapped from the force as they extended outwards. The dark, leathery ailerons knocked over objects and slashed through metal shelves attached to the walls. 

You nearly fell over from the sudden action, intimidated by the spikes that lined the edge at the top. Not only was it long in width, but the height of it was nearly double his stature.

They don't grow their wings like that; they don't get so big they are nearly twice their size. But his had the possibility of rivaling Satan.

"Ever since we were kids, you've let him get away with everything. You've overlooked too many flaws for me to stand here and let you get your heart broken." He reached forward to wipe a tear away, but you couldn't stand the touch of him at the moment. 

It can't be true. 

"What does it matter to you..." It's a broken cry, whimpering from your lips as your heart shatters inside regardless. 

It just can't be true.

"I-" His chest decompresses while his wings descend like a deflating toy. "Baby, I care about you-" 

"Then why are you lying to me!?" 

Zagan startles you as his hands latch onto your shoulders and squeeze. "I'm not lying! Not to you! Not to my Baby." His already slightly high pre-teen voice squeaked, and he cringed at his tone. 

So overwhelmed, filled with grief and disbelief, you stepped backward and spoke to him in a way you never have before. "No, I'm not your Baby. Not anymore." 

It was as if you watched his world crumble in his scarlet eyes. "(Y-(Y/n)...please." 

You couldn't breathe at all, as if someone had your lungs in their hands and were depriving you of any air. With blurry sight, muddled with tears, you turned away and shoved your things into your bag. 

His wings were still in the way; those beautiful things that you loved to play with when he would allow it made the tears all the worse now. "Let me out." You ordered. 

The hands that were once holding your shoulder dropped to hang limply by his side, weak, frail, unstable. "If I let you go, then that's it." 

You were losing strength in your legs.

"(Y/n), don't leave me...please." He begged while stepping forward, but you turned your head away. 

Your grip on the straps of your bag was not enough padding to save your palms from being burrowed into by your nails.  "Goodbye, Zagan."

That was it. You both knew that it was final; there was no going back from this. The friendship has been tarnished, and trust broken. 

It will never be the same again. 

Hesitantly, Zadan curled in his massive wing, and you didn't waste another moment running out of there.

You flung the door open and scurried down the hall. 

Alastor was still in the common room on the couch and waved to you without looking away from his book. "Goodbye, (Y/n)." 

"Goodbye, Alastor." 

You passed the other Lamia siblings who called out to you, and you had to say goodbye, knowing you'd never be back here again. 

On your way to the front door, you tried to be silent, holding down a sob, but when you heard Jahi calling out to you from behind, you nearly bawled right then and there. 

"I'll see you soon, right, Baby?" 

You sniffled, hiding your face as you forcefully shoved your feet into your shoes and half-a**ed-tied them. "Of course, Aunty!" Faking the enthusiasm hurt like a punch to the gut. "I'll see you again soon."

Before she could reply, you left as fast as you could. There's no one left to turn to but him; you need to see him. 

Without a phone or any way to contact him, all you could do was return home and wait for him to get back from the event. 

At first, you walk as if your legs are broken, but the ardent emotions spur you to bolt down the street back to your house. 

You fling the door open and hasten down the hallway to get up the stairs. Your father yells out to you, followed by your younger brother, whose mocking words pierce you like blunt knives. 

The sobs raking your body are excruciating, aching as if your entire figure is cold rubber being pulled. It feels even worse here with all the memories. 

Pictures of the three of you are everywhere: the unfished projects worked on together, and the clothes still left over from when they used to sneak in for a sleepover. 

You cannot stand it; you cannot handle it. 

Everything must go.

There is no carefulness or being mindful of how you handle the things in the room; you throw them into plastic bags with the full intent of being rid of everything. 

Yet when you collapse to your knees to catch your breath, the necklace he gave you slips out from underneath your shirt. 

The sight only provoked your wails to become silent, merely broken, stuttering wheezes as the stress spurred sleep to hold you tightly and close your eyes. 

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

A warm touch ran through your hair while the same heat traveled up and down your spine in a soothing manner. 

"Hey, it's not good to sleep on the cold wooden ground." 

Your awareness was returning, and you groaned audibly while cracking your puffy eyes open. "Mmm, Javan...?" 

He hums in acknowledgment, and as your vision focuses, you see that you are moved onto your bed, the angel boy sitting at the edge as he comforts your head in his lap. 

"I'm sorry it took me so long to get here, Baby." He cooed softly as the singing of grasshoppers filled your room due to the open window. 

His presence, the god-like radiance, was cathartic, like the pounding of raindrops on the roof. Everything had felt so cold, and you felt so alone. 

With Javan here, as he holds you, it's like heaven. 

You tell him everything, everything that happened when you visited Zagan at his home. Without mentioning your feelings for him, you skidded over that part, but it wasn't needed to explain the event.

It hurts inside as if you swallowed a cluster of needles. 

The angel listens silently as he continues to rub your back and send tingles through the muscle. By the time you finished, a new set of tears had befallen your face; however, your throat ached too much to wail audibly. 

"I'm so sorry he did that to you. I knew he had always been rude and inconsiderate, but I didn't think he would ever try to smear my name or break your heart." He murmurs while tilting his head. "I really thought our friendship meant something to him." 

You could barely nod with exhaustion interwoven in your limbs. "Me too..." 

One of Javan's hands lightly grazed over your lips as he trailed it down your neck. "You know how much I care about you, right?" 

【"What does it matter to you..." It's a broken cry, whimpering from your lips as your heart breaks inside regardless. 

"I-" His chest decompresses while his wings descend like a deflating toy. "Baby, I care about you-" 

"Then why are you lying to me!?"】 

You do not trust your voice, only nodding your head as you turn over to hide your face against his abdomen. 

"I cannot tell you enough about how important you are to me." Javan's hand reached down as he clasped his fingers with yours. "You are my everything, Baby. You are my sun-" He squeezed your conjoined hand. "-my moon-" Leiursurely, he leans down to hover by your ear. "-you are the air I need to breathe-" And finally, you felt the softness of his succulent lips caressing the skin of your neck. "-and the strength that lets me fly. I cannot be without you." 

He kisses down your throat until he reaches your shoulder so he can hide his face in the crook of your neck. "Don't let his hurtful lies make you question our friendship, our relationship. We don't need him anyway. Right?" 

When you don't reply, he pulls away and lightly swivels your head to look up at him. "Right, Baby girl? We don't need him. Can you say it?" 

"W-We..." It feels as though you have no voice even to speak. No one wants to drop a friend, let alone one from childhood that was like family. 

Shaking your head, you attempt to pull away; however, you are not permitted to leave. Javan maneuvers your position, with you on your back, as he leans over from above. 

The beautiful white feathered wings flap lightly in the air as the moon glimmers behind him, darkening his halo. 

"You can do it, Baby. I know you can." The angel boy lightly pressed his open palm on your stomach as he stared down with otherworldly eyes. "Here, I'll even say it with you."

 

"I-" 

His hand on your belly lifts so his fingertips trail up to your neck. 

"I-"

He wraps them around your throat, tingles jolting across your skin. 

"-Don't-" 

The angel leans down just close enough to where your nose barely touches.

"-Don't-"

You feel hot beneath your clothes as if you were lying in a sauna. 

"-Need-" 

Your heart hurts, filled heavily with the distraughtness of losing your best friend. 

"-Need-" 

The closeness...the proximity of your bodies were suffocating your lungs. 

"-Him-" 

It's one word, but the impact of it was greater than an asteroid colliding with the moon. 

"-Him-"

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

(Y/n) - Eighteen years old

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

Even early in the morning, the common room of the high school was bustling with activity. You felt heated beneath baggy clothes as you chewed on a piece of gum. 

The insides of your stomach ached as though they were eating its self alive. 

With your cracked phone in hand, your fingers danced over the keyboard as you debated whether or not to double-text. 

Javan has left you on read again without a single response. You've been attempting to get in contact about when you could give him the essay that he needed help with. 

During senior year, you know he's busy with Track and Lacrosse, and he doesn't have the time to check in with you like he used to. 

It doesn't help that it's hard to get close to him. High school does what high school does. 

Angels run with run angels, devils and demons congregate together, and any other monster type sticks with their kind. 

There obviously were a few outcasts, but even then, it was hard to be included. Not even mentioning how the small populations of humans weren't a fan of you. The humans said you were too close to the monster, and the monsters didn't like you because you were human. 

Lose/lose situation. 

Just thinking about it always puts a damper on your mood. The isolation and seclusion were nothing new; it was merely exhausting to have to do everything by yourself. 

You threw the broken phone on the round table in the common room and leaned over the AP history textbook that was open. Its cold, plastic-like texture felt pleasant against your warm skin. 

Sleep hasn't been gracing you for a while now. There have been just too many things to do. So much homework, more than half, not even yours. Javan already had so much on his plate. As his best friend, it felt only right to help him as much as you could. 

Resting the side of your head on your arms, you stared out at the entrance of the school. More students poured into the halls as the time grew closer to the first period. 

Hopefully, Javan arrives by himself, so you won't need to deal with the other angels questioning your presence. 

For beings that were made to be messengers of god, they were rather concerned about their vanity. Well, that's what happens when they are left to themselves.

They become rather human in their sins. 

Your already sour mood became acidic as the one person you wish you didn't have to see walked through the door. 

He had to bend down from his 6'6 (198.12cm-1.9812m) height, the grown crystal horns on top of his head only causing more hassle; it nearly scraped against the already lofty door frame. 

Zagan used to believe that his horns would never grow, considering his younger siblings had curled and extended way earlier than he ever did.

The demon boy was just a late bloomer. 

He used to be this short, scrawny little guy who was never in the slightest popular. Many of your peers picked on him, mocking him for his appearance, calling him a pathetic excuse of a demon. 

Now, he was practically the poster child. His muscles grew, making him beefy and bulky. His upper torso was wide, more specifically, his shoulders, with his chest broadening. 

Through his tighter clothes, anyone could see the muscle definition of his abbs and v-line. Before, Zagan was never one for such fitted clothes; you knew he was always insecure about his skeletal limbs and hid them beneath sweats and oversized attire. 

Similar to his upper body, his legs grew just as muscular and thick. They fitted dark jeans perfectly to where you could see the curves and meat beneath the cloth. 

What has also changed is his hair. His blonde curls were less defined, and he cut them so they were just slightly beneath his ear. 

His earlobes are now pierced and riddled with embellishments and rings. Those beautifully dangerous batty wings of his had somehow grown even larger; the width was nearly unbelievable, with the height a little past his head. 

The spikes were pointier, more ominous. 

At first, when he was younger, he needed to bind his abnormally large wings for his size because he didn't have the control to keep them closed or out of the way. Now, he still has to bind them only because they are so oversized that even when he curls them in, it's like he walks with a wall behind him.

Zagan Lamia went from being super nerdy and a loner to a big shot that everyone wanted to be affiliated with...everyone but the angels and you. 

Now, your ex-friend ran with the other demon students. He was like a celebrity, someone the girls threw themselves at, and the boys always tried to get into his good gracious with. 

Sometimes, when you look at his mature appearance, you wonder if it was you who was holding him back from his potential. 

For a moment, it felt as though Zagan's scarlet red gaze rose to meet yours as he swiped his tongue over his plump bottom lip. A small black ring pierced the left side of his lip, and he appeared to fiddle with it as he neared. 

Your heart abruptly skipped a beat, and the back of your neck was drenched with sweat. 

It's as though he's deadset on making his way to you, but a warm hand on your neck startled you. Your head flew up as you swung your gaze in the other direction. 

Javan plopped his body down in the seat beside yours and tilted his head while smiling almost coyly. "What were you looking at, Baby?" 

Your stomach coils like two hot wires being twisted around each other. Glancing back swiftly, there doesn't appear to be any trace of Zadan. He's nowhere to be seen, and that's saying something.

"Nothing." You murmur softly and return your attention to the angel. "Just thought I saw something, must be my mind playing tricks on me." 

He hummed slowly, staring at your phone tossed aside on the table before glancing at your face. "I can see that you haven't been sleeping. Bad dreams?" His words are laced with honey, so sweet that you devour it like a greedy little kid. 

You don't want to seem incompetent by confessing that you feel overwhelmed by your workload, so you attempt to smile and nod your head. "Yeah, bad dreams and Yose's little pranks getting out of hand." 

Javan laughs lightly; you're sure that he can easily imagine that annoying little menace of a brother bothering you. 

Similar to Zagan, the angel had grown and matured just as much. He didn't get beefy like the demon; his build was more athletic and toned. 

His muscular limbs were proportionate to his 6'2ft (188.976cm - 1.8796m) stature, the white feathered wings just as big and as tall as himself. They curled perfectly behind his back; wouldn't be a problem unless he unfurled them outwards. 

That long hair of his was no more. He cut it so it was long bangs over his forehead and a mullet of some sort down the back of his neck. 

There was just something about the angels and the way they dressed; they were always on trend, stylish, and attired in a manner that always made their bodies look the best. 

It was like having supermodels strutting down the halls, not accounting for the succubus' or Incubi. 

Realizing why you were upset in the first place, you dig through your heavy backpack to pull out your Chromebook. "Before I forget, let me send the essay to you." 

Javan beamed, his ocean eyes practically glimmering as he wrapped a hand around the back of your neck. "I literally forgot. You really are a lifesaver!"

【The angel shrugs, and you roll your eyes. "This cannot be a habit, you know." His gaze is burning against the side of your face, provoking little tingles to run up your spine. "Fine...Fine, you can copy." Once you spoke, he beamed so brightly that his halo pulsated almost blindly. 

He's like the sun that you could have in your arms. 

"You're a lifesaver! Mom would kick my a** if I got anything below an A." He expressed with his white wings fluttering behind his back. 

He's so cute. 

"Yeah, yeah. If you would just stop being lazy and forgetful, you'd never have to worry." As you return your gaze to the Chromebook, you catch a glimpse of dark wings and light hair.】

It's been four years, but that memory from the courtyard in middle school suddenly flashed in your mind. So long ago, but the recollection still feels as though it were yesterday. 

The loss still feels so fresh. 

"Right..." You wheeze out before clearing your throat. "What are your plans today? I've been wanting to get out of the house and go somewhere other than work." 

J appears to think intently, his gaze almost out of focus, before he shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair. "I don't think I can. The community is meeting up at the grand church for a ceremony tonight." 

The dejection is evident, your shoulders sagging, but it's what you expected. He's ever so busy; you should be more considerate of his schedule. 

Humming, you sent over the documents through email as you kept your gaze away from meeting his. "Are you still going to senior formal?" You question just to start a conversation. 

It's been weeks since you've actually been able to speak face-to-face with him. You're soaking his attention in as much as you can.

"Yeah, I wasn't gonna go, but the others convinced me." 

"Oh~?" Your lips form into a faux smile. "Javan Wyn was peer pressured?" 

The hand on the back of your was removed to flick at your forehead. "I don't get peer pressured." He stated, which spurred you to roll your eyes. 

"Alright, whatever you say, Angel Boy. Do you have at least a date?" 

"No." 

The heat beneath your baggy clothes grew worse, and a sudden surge of anxiety flushed through your bloodstream. "Are you going to ask someone?" 

You don't know whether you want him to say yes or no. He's so handsome, his appearance nearly a blessing of god. It's astounded you that he isn't in a relationship. 

Everyone flocks to him. 

And you're still in love with him after twelve years.

"Hmm." He leans over the table and rests his chin in the palm of his hand. "I haven't really put any thought into it." 

A breath of air you hadn't realized you were holding in was released as you laughed. What did you expect? 

He's never voiced anything about liking any of the girls at the school, and you'd know. Best friends tell each other everything. 

"Well, if you come up with someone in mind, won't you tell me first?" You offer while leisurely closing your Chromebook. 

"Sure, Baby. You'll be the first to know." Javan laughs under his breath while swiping a loose strand of hair over to behind your ear. Doing so, he was able to see a very small hair clip you had to keep some frays out of your face. 

"What's this?" He questions, and you're unable to meet his gaze. 

You immediately remove the clip and conceal it within the palm of your hand. "Oh! I-It's nothing. I just forgot to take it out. My hair was just getting in the way." 

Whatever the angel says goes a long way for you. If he says a certain color looks good on you, you're altering your whole theme. 

When he tells you, 'I really like it when you wear baggy clothes. You don't look good when you wear anything tight.' You change your entire wardrobe, so maybe he'll like you more. 

Maybe his eyes would linger on you more when you listen when he says, 'Don't wear make-up, you look so much better bare-faced. Make-up just doesn't fit someone like you.' 

Perhaps he'll tell you he likes the way you look when you do your hair just the way he likes it. 'It's ugly when you put those clips in your hair, ya know. I only like girls who keep their hair up in a bun. Yeah, yeah, that suits you much better.' 

You would do anything for him. 

"Don't forget next time." Javan reprimands and reaches for the colorful metal clip in your hand. "It's ugly when you wear it." 

Your throat tightens, constricting with the sensation of sobbing, attempting to force its way through. But you swallow it down and nod your head with a small, frantic smile. "Of course." 

His warm fingers graze over your palm to take the clip in his own and leans back to aim and toss it in the garbage can against the wall. "There." He murmurs while turning back to face you with a gleaming smile. "You look so much better when you're like this." 

Simple, he likes it when you appear simple and clean. He likes it when you wear ill-fitting clothes, even when it's hot, and you're swathed in sweat. He likes it when you tie your hair up, fringes, and lose hair gelled back. 

He likes it when you do nothing more. 

The bell rings, which draws his attention as well as that of other students who scatter to get to class on time. The angel stands and pats your face lightly while grazing his thumb over your lip. 

Your entire stomach is doing front lips, and you could melt in his angelic touch. 

"I'll see you around, Baby." And with that, he departs from the common area to leave you alone just as you were before.

It was nice while it lasted, but all good things must come to an end. 

"See you around, Javan." It whispers from your lips as you shift in your seat to collect your things.

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂ 

You hate that sensation, the feeling of chlorine in your hair. Even as you try to scrub and wash it out after aquatic fitness, that awful tacky and dry sensation sticks to every strand. 

It sucks, considering how much you enjoyed swimming. Weightless, fluid, as if you're flying away from here. The way your hands split the water, the manner in which your body glides through it so easily, drives all your worries to melt away. 

Shutting off the shower in the female locker room, you reach for your towels and wrap them around your body and hair. 

There should still be at least ten more minutes before the bell rings for the end of class. You can take a little bit of time to look presentable-ish. 

As you enter the lockers, it appears that all the other girls had finished before you, already gone. Not that you minded either; you didn't like their eyes on your body, judging in the way they always do. 

You're just a little human in a world of monsters.

Sighing, you undid the code to the lock and opened the locker. Instead of seeing your change of clothes and other items, it was bare.

Not a single object or article of clothing. 

Your entire stomach filled with dread, and dropped to your knees. 

"Awe, whatever happened to your clothes~?" It's a sickeningly sweet voice that originated behind you. The hairs on the back of your neck stand on end as your heart skips a beat. 

Laughing lightly even though you desire to scream, you remove the towel from your hair and slowly turn around. "I just can't seem to keep my things together." 

It's suffocating, standing in only thin, short clothes as six other students surround you, four angels and two humans. 

Water trickled down your neck while you swallowed thickly. 

"Oh, we agree." One of the angels expresses and steps forward. "Which is why you need to learn a lesson~!" She's so pretty; is such a shame her personality is rotten.

You latched onto the front of your towel as you stepped back, only for the locker to shock you with the contrast of heat. 

"I-I'm sure I'm innocent." You're losing your voice, becoming guttural like you had been screaming it away. "What did I do?"

A human girl latches her hand on your bicep and tugs you so hard that you nearly slip on the cold concrete ground. 

"You need to be reminded of your place." 

Before you can attempt to de-escalate the situation, your other arm is latched onto, and you're being dragged away. 

There is no grip on your bare feet that you are just sliding on the floor. You can only hold onto that thin towel to keep even a bit of your modesty. 

"Stop it! Hey!" They bring you closer to the exit, where loud chattering emanates from. Classmates and other students must fill the large open area where the hallway had opened up for gatherings. 

Your elbow slams back, knocking into one of the girl's noses. She gasps, and blood immediately begins to trickle down. 

She licks it while a terrifying sneer forms on her plump lips. "You bitch!" Her hand latches onto the back of your knotted, wet hair as two others open the door. 

They managed to drag you through the door and thrust you outwards so you fall forward. You're barely able to catch yourself, striking your knees on tile that immediately spurred an onset of blood to stream down your shins. 

Laughter...Laughter reverberates outwards, so loud that the vibrations echo beneath the ground. 

You feel sick. 

The one you had hit grasped onto the back of your hair again. She tugged your head upwards to look at everyone while also grabbing onto the bottom of your jaw. 

At least more than half of your grade had congregated in this massive area, and they surrounded you like a school of fish.

"Look, everyone! It's the girl who thinks she's better than us!" 

Ice runs through your veins, so cold that it's a burning sensation. The insides of your throat swell up, depriving you of air. 

You're scared.

You're humiliated. 

They're laughing at you, their giggles and cheers so deafening it's as though they are bursting your eardrums. 

"Come on!" A different girl locks onto your wrist and pulls you to your feet with her pure strength. "Where did all that entitlement go!?" 

Not even a second after you are standing, were you kicked down and forced to collapse on your bruised and rived knees. 

A strangled gasp wheezed from your lips as the inner corner of your eyes stung. Tears clouded your conjunctiva before trickling down your heated face. 

"Doesn't she deserve a little humility!?" Courses of 'yes' and cheers echo like the booms of fireworks. They begin chanting...chanting to take everything away. 

These people wanted to ruin you. 

Your hand holding up the towel was yanked away as another gripped the cloth to tear it off your body. 

"No!" Just as you finally release your voice, a vociferous snapping sound overtakes the shouting and replaces it with gasps. 

Scarlet red eyes meet your gaze as his wings tear apart the binds and extend outwards, knocking nearly half the crowd to the ground. 

He practically teleported in front of your figure to yank you up to your feet by one of your wrists and hold you tight to his body. 

The massive size of his wings is not just for show as he flaps them; the force sends everyone tumbling away, skidding across the ground and hitting the walls. 

You cannot breathe, even with your lungs expanding and retracting vigorously and your mouth gulping in the air like a fish; lightheadedness only grows more intense. 

Zagan's burly arm wraps firmly around your back as he hauls you back into the locker room, the male locker room. 

A clamorous cry echoes out from your lips as you grip his shirt, burrowing your nails in his thick, muscled waist. You didn't mean to cry, to wail out and release this visceral wail that rattles through your entire being.

He doesn't say a single word, merely picking your much smaller figure into a bridal position. His body heat contrasted against the chill of your damp person in such a way that you immediately succumb to his warm hold. 

To be against his body brings back so many memories, all before the fallout, before the trio became nothing anymore.

You've missed him so much. 

Why did it have to be this way?

The strength of your sobs worsens, racking through your bones. Zagan's wings surround the two of you, blocking out the light and muffling the sounds from outside.  

It's only the quiet hum of the internal conditioning and your blustering cries. Your face is hidden against his pecs, wetting his shirt, but he doesn't seem to mind. 

He only continues to hold you like you're a cracked vase, precious, broken, and needing his undivided attention. 

Even though your nose is stuffed, this close proximity and protective surroundings of his wings allow you to smell his scent. 

Zagan smells like an early dawning, with fog concealing the world and honeydew drops garnishing the grass. 

This is not the smell of heaven, but damn, does it feel like paradise. 

Soon, without a single word being spoken, your cries cease to become hiccups and whimpers. Strength has dissipated from your muscles, leaving your entire being exhausted. 

You just want to fall asleep and never wake up. 

The demon boy leans his head down, and though it is void of light while swathed in his batty wings, you can feel his gaze on your face.

His one arm under your shoulder gingerly pushed up upwards so you were sitting on his lap. He held onto your bare thigh while allowing your head to rest on his shoulder. 

There are tingles erupting beneath his fingers that ignite your nerves. You've never been touched like this before.

"Better?" Not the voice of an angel, not the singing of the devil; it's something entirely different. Deeper, coarser, it's manly and rugged. 

The sound of it reminds you of a rustic cabin, lost in the woods with a fire burning in a stone pit. Everything, from the foundation to the wiring, was done by hand. 

It feels personal. 

Slackly, with barely any strength, you nod your head and raise a hand to swipe at your face. 

"...You...You still have it." 

It is obvious what he's referring to; that cold pendant abruptly feels warm at the mention of the necklace. You hadn't the heart to remove it or to throw it away. 

Doing so would be completely removing him from your life, even more than he already was. "Yeah..." You didn't want to tell him anymore. 

You can't tell him that sometimes you'd grip that necklace and pray that everything would revert back to the way it used to be. Or that you'd run your fingers on the engraving on the back, remembering when he was always there for you...always there until that event. 

Feeling him nod his head, his massive spiked wings part very carefully to let in the light. Zagan stands up to place your body in the spot he was just sitting in and strides over to a wall of lockers. 

The way he just manhandles you sends shivers across your stomach and farther down.

He undoes the lock and shuffles through a bag before turning to face your figure. You can't believe the man standing in front of you is Zagan. 

This is really the same nerd who had to look up at you; now you have to crane your neck even to meet his gaze. 

It's really been four years without even acknowledging one another.

"Here, It's obviously not going to fit, but it's better than nothing." Zagan murmurs as he steps closer to lay a set of clothes on your lap. 

That sweater...he still had that same dark red sweater that you bought him once at the mall. You said it went well with his eyes, made them as bright as stars. 

It most definitely doesn't fit him now, which means he's kept it even after he had finally developed. 

"I'm going to turn around to make sure no one comes in while you change." 

His speech breaks you from your thoughts. You peek upwards just as he folds his wings and trekks over to the locker room door. 

You feel more self-conscious now with Zagan's back turned than you did in front of the other students. The tips of your ears are burning along with your cheeks. 

It's almost like the clothes are made of glass the way you gently handle them and set them on the seat as you stand. Your body has long dried after the shower, yet you keep the towel over your shoulder as you shuffle on his attire. 

The sweater was soft, lined with cushiony fabric that felt nice against your skin. Without a bra or support system, you were lucky it was rather oversized and thick to obscure your chest. 

Next is the pair of black fleece sweatpants. You end up fitting it well; you're definitely sure that this was from when he was smaller. 

Luckily, there's a drawstring that you end up tying to tighten at your waist. 

"I'm done." You meant for your voice to be firm, but it's gravelly and coarse, as if you need to clear your throat. 

He tilts his head back to look, but he audibly sucks in a breath of air before flinging his head in another direction. One hand covers his mouth as the other holds onto the wall for support

Your brows crease tightly, and your fingers form into fists in the sleeves that are too long for you. "Is something wrong?"  

It took a short moment for him to clear his throat. He shook his head as if he were freeing himself from thoughts while extending a large, coarse hand outward. "Grab my hand, and I'll take you home." 

It's as though he steals the air right out of your lungs.   

After everything? After what you said to him, after dropping him...he's still caring for you. 

You want to hit him. If only he didn't accuse Javan of what he said, nothing would have changed. 

"I-I can go home on my own." You state, yet it only prompts him to click his tongue and step forward. 

He immediately dwarfs your smaller stature by his much larger one. The demon peers down with an unknown expression, one where you can't even tell what he's thinking. 

Those gorgeous wings of his softly flutter to gain your attention just as one corner of his succulent lips quirk upwards. "And miss the chance to fly?"

How right he was. 

As kids, you begged them to take you flying. One of them would hold you close and raise you to the sky so you could feel utterly weightless. 

Nothing mattered while you soared, not your f*cked up family, not your unrequited love, nothing at all but that freedom. 

You haven't felt it in four years because Javan was always too busy and Zagan...

"Fine." It whispers from your lips as you shift your gaze away. "Just home, please." 

His small, angled eyes squinted as if he knew what you were thinking while he nodded his head. "Let's go." He states and reaches for one of your hands. 

That warmth surrounds you again as he holds on tight and departs from the male locker room. It's empty within the common area; seems that everyone knew better to leave than to stick around and face the poster boy's wrath. 

It's sunny outside as you both exit through a side door. The sun is high, with a few fluffy white clouds clumped together. You were maneuvered into a new position, one where Zagan held your body in the bridal position again before taking off. 

Those massive wings of his are so powerful, so strong that he could probably outfly any fighter jet. He's arrived in the sky in the blink of an eye.

Wind is whipping around your baby hairs and striking against your face, yet you welcome the little stings. 

You're light, fluid, and weighed down by nothing in this moment. Zagan's flying through the clouds, allowing your fingers to feel the slight chill and moisture like before. 

It earned a laugh from your lips, a genuine one that hasn't graced your face in a long, long time. The demon's grip grew tighter at the sound of laughter and peeked down at your face. 

Your eyes met for a second, and his lips parted as though he desired to speak, but they shut upon arriving in your neighborhood. 

Not yet; you didn't want to go home just yet. 

"We could fly around a little longer." Your eyes fling upwards to meet his as he swallows. "If you want, that is." 

No, no, you don't want to go home at all. 

You feel an ache in your stomach, a burn in your eyes, and a pressure in your throat.

Doesn't he hate you at all? 

"Just...Just take me home, please." You spoke a lie, and god should have struck you down right then and there. 

How is it that you both look-feel so dejected?

The scarlet-eyed demon descends from his high place in the sky to your window on the second floor. You manage to crack it open before slipping inside and shifting around to face the dirty blond-haired man. 

He hovered in his spot, taking in the view of your bedroom after so long. All the pictures of him are gone; all the gifts he's given you are nowhere in sight. 

"I'll uh-" His tongue fiddles with the lip ring as he drops his gaze. "I'll get your bag from school and bring it over."

You want to tell him not to worry about it, but you do not trust your voice, so you merely nod your head. 

Zagan mimics your action and lightly taps the windowsill before flying away. Your puffy eyes follow and watch his figure until he's too far to be seen. 

Too far gone. 

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂ 

When Zagan returned from gathering your things from the school, he lightly tapped on your window to gain your attention. 

However, he received no response, none at all. The blinds were pulled together so that he couldn't see inside...nor feel your presence. 

The demon knocked again, a little louder this time, with again no response. He reacted without thinking, thrusting up the old window and nearly tearing off the blinds.

It was the same as he saw earlier: slightly messy, books splayed open, clothes folded but not put away, yet there was something different. 

On the bench by the window was the folded set of clothes he allowed you to wear...and a note on top. His fingers were shaky for some reason, filled with dread as if he were inches away from death. 

Flipping it open displayed just a few words with messy handwriting, like writing in a rush. 

《

I'm sorry, I can't do this anymore goodbye

》

The paper tore in his grasp while the pair of fangs in his mouth elongated and sharpened. Every muscle within his body tensed and constricted. 

F*ck, f*ck, f*ck! 

This can't be happening!

You can't be gone! 

He tried to control his breathing, attempting to calm himself just the slightest so he could figure out where the f*ck you had gone. 

But your scent is decamped with not a trace of or trail leading anywhere. Even your presence, the very feeling of your soul, is nowhere close. 

He can't feel it, he can't feel you. 

After years of saying it, knowing you so well, even after four years of disregarding each other, he knows you did it. 

You ran away. 

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

(Y/n) - Twenty-Two Years Old

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

Continuing on in pt.2

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

Short and dramatic, but it's better than nothing, right? This had been in the drafts for a long time, but I decided to break it up into 2 parts just to get it out. It also allows me to focus on the second act of the story. 

This is setting up for pt.2, where all the drama is going to unfold. The reader gets found and realizes the truth, more daddy Zagan screen time (he's gonna be in a gang hehe), and Javan is confronted. There's gonna be fistfights, tears, and a lot of sl*tty demon s*x. 

Psst, I'll let you in on a little secret. The Lamia household has lots of siblings, right? Well, certain demons have a little...hmm, how do I say this...have a breeding trait passed down through generations. Jahi has it, which explains the seven children, and well...Zagan's very much like his mother.

Which makes him a 'Breeding Bull'. So that's something to look forward to in pt.2 ;)

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

↳If you'd like to support me or read 30+ drafts of TDMLM or my other stories, please consider buying me Kofi. You can find the link on my profile! Thank you :) 

꧁𓊈𒆜 ━━━━━━━━━ 𒆜𓊉꧂

𝐌𝐚𝐦𝐚 signing out

[midnights-dragon]

Pinned post 📌

Feel free to skip over if you're just stalking my blog! (Here's a song for you to listen to.) ->

Important, first of all:

This user supports AO3

This user is anti-censorship

This user believes in "don't like, don't read"

This user believes in "ship and let ship"

This user believes that fiction tastes and preferences do not dictate moral character

So feel free to block me if you disagree. Additionally, I do not usually post political things; however, if I ever do, and you disagree, DO NOT attack me over it. Like, seriously. Just unfollow and move on! Block if you have to. I frankly could not care less. Though, if you are transphobic, I ask that you don't follow me at all, as I do happen to be trans myself. And don't even try to send hate; anon asks are off, and I will freely blast & report you.

Now onto the good stuff! ->

Things that I love/am hyperfixated on:

Good Omens

Hozier & Queen (average Good Omens fan)

Snakes, sharks, and birds (and dinosaurs)

The concept of love & how it relates to romantic vs platonic

Nature

My cat and bearded dragon (you will see pictures of them you have no choice)

Cliche old movies (The Parent Trap 1998, my beloved)

Animated adult movies

Bojack Horseman (run far away)

Sometimes just random fucking shit that Tumblr puts on my For You, and that I will then reblog like 20 posts of in rapid succession, very unescapable, not sorry about that

ASKS ARE ALWAYS WELCOME, AS ARE DMS!!! Nothing weird obviously, keep in mind that I am a minor (though I do enjoy smutfics, as any teenager does), but I LOVE random people saying random things, it makes me feel like a friend. Which you are to me! I love making mutuals as well, and if you want to be on a tag list for games like picrew chains, just let me know, I do those a lot. They're fun!

Now, writing requests & my Ao3! ->

I do accept writing requests, feel free to ask for anything for fandoms I'm in (if it's something topic-heavy, CWs are appreciated in advance), but obviously I'm not going to write anything like underage content or proship; I AM ANTI-CENSORSHIP, as said, I just am not a writer of pro-ship content, myself.

My favorite tropes:

Angst, specifically Hurt/Comfort

Nightmares

Human AUs

Trauma Recovery

Anything involving domestic & non-sexual nudity

Religious Trauma Messages

Panic Attacks/PTSD (and being helped through that)

Generally, just. Angst. Hurt/Comfort. Happy Ending, though. I sometimes write fluff one-shots I sweat it just does not happen Often

Mostly anything goes; obviously I'm at full liberty to delete any messages I get or not do them, but I LOVE requests and I usually more often than not do end up doing them! Just send it my way (ask box or DMs is fine) and I'll let you know. I write currently for almost exclusively Good Omens content, which can be found under the AO3 link below. Specifically, here is my Good Omens Masterlist!

A little intro to me as a writer can be found here from a recent ask game I participated in, if that is of interest to you. Also here from my 2023 Ao3 wrapped.

I'm on a lot of other socials under a similar url! You can find my Twitter here, and my Instagram here, and then my Ao3. I mainly post similar content on all my socials, just reposting memes, art, and fandom stuff and sometimes posting stuff of my own! I'm a young artist, but proud of whatever work I muster up the courage to post. Which is not a lot, but nonetheless

If you’d like to support me and my work in any way, feel free to support me on my GoFundMe for my future top surgery/transition/therapy in relating to gender dysphoria if you are able and wanting! I am trans FTM, and use he/him pronouns, as it says in my bio. However, this is in no way an attempt to pressure anyone to do anything. Please think of yourself before a random stranger on the internet.

Anyways, thank you for all of the love I've ever gotten across any platform, I love how kind people can be. And if you're mean, then, well, I prefer if you didn't interact, because this is what I try to make a safe space. Unless I was mean to you first (with disregard to transhomophobes and the like), then it's free game, and also, my bad. <3 Enjoy my blog!

[mysticfoxdesigns]

✨Welcome to my Blog✨

⚠️Warning⚠️: This blog is rated PG-16, this is your only warning

🌆Table of Contents🌆

💜Introduction💜

💖Links💖

📚Fanfic List📚

🌛Side Blogs🌜

☄️Art Status☄️

🪻Repost Info🪻

🌠Projects🌠

🌟Tags🌟

🌌Asks Rules🌌

🎧Spotify Playlists🎧

💟Reminders💟

This blog is a safe space for queer, POC, disabled, and anyone who doesn't fit into social norms. I WILL NOT TOLERATE BIGOTRY AND FASCISM ON THIS BLOG. YOU WILL BE BLOCKED IMMEDIATELY!!!

🇵🇸This blog supports Palestine🇵🇸

💜Introduction💜

Get to know me a bit better!

Name: Mystic/Kate

Pronouns: she/they

Sexuality: Aromantic Lesbian

Age: 19

Favorite Colors: purple (duh), green, black

Favorite Animals: foxes, siphonophores, sharks, frogs

Special Interests: marine biology, WW2, Transformers, Octonauts, Riot Grrrl movement

Contact: mysticfoxdesigns@gmail.com

My CAARD

💖Links💖

Links to all accounts I own, aka anything else is pretending to be me

Instagram

Twitch

AO3

Quotev

Redbubble

Inprnt

Kofi

Youtube

Artfol

Pinterest

Spotify

Tiktok

Bluesky (will be added soon)

Twitter (rarely use)

📚Fanfic Links📚

All of my fanfics that I have posted to AO3. Some have been cross posted to my old Wattpad account, but I rarely use that anymore. You do need an AO3 account to view all of my works unfortunately. Due to the AI bs, I have locked all of my fanfics.

Visiting Home (Octonauts)

My Hero ANGST-ademia (BNHA)

The Black Ring Promise (BNHA)

This Was a Mistake (BNHA)

The Window is Frosted Over: Until it Breaks (BNHA)

The Color Court Returns (MLB)

Cyberaligned Continuity (Transformers)

🌛Side Blogs🌜

All of my sideblogs here on Tumblr

@thearomanticautistic (personal blog)

@tf-cyberaligned (fan continuity blog

@turbofox-zines (my zine account)

@mythofthemountainscomic (my original comic, blog is still a wip)

☄️Art Status☄️

What I have open or closed artwise

Commissions: OPEN (PFP commissions)

Art Trades: Mutuals Only

Art Requests: CLOSED (refer to Asks Rules for rules on requests)

🪻Repost Info🪻

My rules on reposts

ALWAYS ask for permission from me before you repost my artwork!

If you get permission, follow these rules

• DO NOT EDIT OUT MY WATERMARK

• Tag me in the post, no matter what platform you post it to

• Do not use my art to sell products!

• Do not edit my art in any way, shape, or form

If you DO NOT have my permission to repost my art

DON'T REPOST IT

🌠Projects🌠

Past and present creative projects I am working on

Myth of the Mountains (present, on hold)

BNHA Whump Bang 2023 (finished)

TF Cyberaligned (present, WIP)

TFRB and RBA Zine (present, in production)

The Color Court Returns (present, on hold)

TFP x Octonauts (present, WIP)

🌟Tags🌟

All of the tags I use to organize stuff

#mystic chaos

#mysticfox rambles

What I use for posts where I am just rambling about ideas and things in my brain

#mysticfox wips

Any kind of work in progresses I have going on

#tccr updates

Updates about The Color Court Returns

#cyberaligned continuity

#cyberaligned lore

#cyberaligned designs

Anything dealing with my TF continuity Cyberaligned

#octonauts

All octonauts related posts

#reblog from side blog

Reblogs from any of my side blogs

🌌Ask Rules🌌

My rules for asks. They are pretty always open!

Keep it PG-14. Minors follow my account, and while some suggestive stuff is allowed, don't be too graphic about it.

No hate speech, bigotry, or fascism. You'll just be blocked

Don't come in here demanding I update a fic, that will just make me NOT want to write for it anymore.

Art requests MUST BE SFW!! I will not do NSFW art requests.

Questions about any of my projects are always welcomed!

🎧Spotify Playlists🎧

All of the Spotify playlists I have made (and am proud of)

The long playlist my friends hate seeing

My friends told me to make a shorter playlist so here we are

I am one step away from anarchy so have a playlist

Tenya Iida Kinning Hours

CyberAligned Background

Robot Regicide vibes

💟Reminders💟

Some things to keep in mind.

I am disabled. I am an autistic person, so sometimes I won't always get what you mean when sending messages. If it feels like the tone can be confusing, please use tone tags. Also don't be afraid to be direct with me, it's the only way I will get what you are trying to say.

I have many other mental disorders as well that I will not go into. Joking about them is one of the ways I cope, so be warned that dark humor is my kind of humor. This is why my blog is rated PG-16, I am not going to shy away from what I deal with on a day to day basis. Torturing my favorite characters is another way I cope, sorry my blue boys, and many of my posts may be more mature cause of this.

[minerwarfare-suzuya]

Aftermath

Miles Ownership timeline drama

Public Announcement

So, apparently Mobox87 has blocked me (not surprising or upsetting. Not like I'm going to have an outburst like I did in 2016) and messaged Kevonica about my post on Miles due to how she's brought up in it. I just want to clarify that she wouldn't have been brought up at all if she didn't put Miles on a pedestal for any issues that he causes with artists or with Mobox87 fans. So, yeah not my fault you get dragged into drama because Miles has to bring you into the argument for his defense.

But-

I will just say that I won't do another rant post on Mobox since I don't want to thrive on that to where she's becoming more uncomfortable being online than she already is. I don't support her IRL stalker and online stalker madbox91 harassment nor do I wish her to harm herself like she did before over Zombify's Twitter thread and feel that she needs to be taken off the internet by deleting her accounts all over social media.

I've come to a point where I don't care if Mobox87 apologizes because her and I will never be on good terms which the same could be said to her ex-friends that were once close to her. Plus, her apologies won't ever go into details on what she's done wrong since they always go on to say "I've done some bad things" (like what did you do?) or victimize herself saying "I was a manipulable person" (that neglects the fact that you made bad decisions on your own sense of mind not by others requests or demands). Either way, it's whatever at this point. I don't need 21 apologies for her to say publicly or privately to everyone.

Honestly, what goes on with Mobox87's art is whatever at this point. As long as she keeps explicit content on a second account that isn't advertised on her main then that's fine. Some may disagree but that's a post I'll talk about soon since I do want some understanding on what can work with mature story tellng.

So, Mobox this won't be the last you'll hear from me. Not until I make one last post on giving a sneak peek of my script segment "Understanding" which will later follow up with a Maverick video posted here. For now, do whatever you want Mobox. Anything and everything said about you has been done.

In other words, I'll leave you alone for now since I do want you to succeed expectations to prove that you have changed as a person online.

Anyways!

Miles responded to my timeline post, specifically part 6 of my post cause I showed how he wanted to be in a committed relationship with a minor that was 16 who barely becoming 17.

Apparently he's been calling out Kevonica, Cagney and I out. Kev has been getting labeled as homophobic, racists and a pedophile with no evidence provided against her.

Most of the stuff said on his new account is just propaganda to make him look like he's the victim in the situation I called him out in. It's quite honestly no surprise he'd stoop so low as to label us as something we're not with out any evidence.

So just know that Miles is saying shit out of his ass.

One example being that he posted on his Instagram account "human_anthony_dust" and reposted on his new Tumblr account, calling me out as a pedo still and lying about how I "claimed false age" to his OC that he bought from Mobox87.

Which again he never announced the age of the OC publicly. Even then you can age up characters in drawings but I didn't since the OC is 30 years old or in his 30s. He's complaining over nothing.

Vinsnake is literally William Afton created as a fantasy character for Faces of Nothing. William Afton is a character in his 30s in which Mobox87 herself made Vinsnake around that exact age as it was originally attended.

Again, Miles never made the character 16 years old until he bitched about my drawing in response for harassing Yuriviq on DeviantArt.

Ironic though-

You made a character 16 years old last minute while you were trying to get with someone who you said was a 16 year old.

Even more ironic, that most of the OCs you kept the longest were kid OCs from Mobox87 while the adult OCs you owned were sold off first.

Doesn't really help your case after admitting you wanted to be with someone under 18.

Oh but wait-

I suppose you did take Kev's own words into consideration.

But that contradicts your deleted post before publicly sharing that "Important info".

You're obviously lying to protect your image and make Kev look guilty for showing me her conversation with you so I can look like I'm the dumb one jumping to conclusions.

The last response from Miles was this. Still being misleading and excusing his own actions

The following list says.

• Kevonica, Cagney and I look down at people for simple human mistakes.

Ah yes because saying I like a 16 year old barely becoming 17 while still under 18 when you're 21 surely is a "simple" human mistake.

Heck maybe the harassment all over Amino without remorse was a "simple" human mistake.

Surely, that IP ban you did to someone over a drawing of your paid OC was a "simple" human mistake.

• Lie about others and only care what they think is the correct answer.

Miles, that is you as a person. You fit that description cause you are a liar and only care what you think.

• Sick of our mental abuse, harassment and cuber bullying

Mental abuse? Where is the evidence on that of us ever doing that? Harassment and Cyber bullying is what you do since you fucken spam our DMs at 7 in the morning to talk out of your ass!

• Time to take a real adult step

You're a literal man. Whose a cry baby and the epitome of a bitch online over your petty nonsense. Like get that in your head. I'm not the one with entitlement over stupid reasons and lack of common sense.

Anyways, I'm just going to end it here because this asshole begged for a response after I went silent. So, here it is because you practically asked for it. This was your moment.

[light-lanterne]

okie, so bad news: about a week ago a beloved anon informed me of the fact that someone was posting screenshots of my dark / cannibalism byler stories on twitter (the ones i've been harassed over for months, mind you -_- ) and claiming them as their own. they weren't getting many notes, thankfully, but one of their reposts (for my story on survival cannibalism, which is a proper little fic) was getting quite a bit of traction —still under 100 notes, but certainly more than what i got— and the others weren't doing much differently than when i post them here.

so,,, i messaged them and requested for the deletion of my stories from their profile, and immediately got blocked. then i used an old account i have for another fandom and tried again (with the same result). then i considered using yet another old account to just link to my original work in their replies so at least people would see it,,,

,,,and then the survival cannibalism thing breached containment and reached a group of nasties who immediately attacked and harassed the reposter, and within a few hours their account was gone altogether.

so i guess problem solved ? albeit in a rather foul and unfortunate way that i wish hadn't had to happen; from what i saw the stuff the reposter was sent was akin to the more horrid things i've been sent on anon (including photos of actual gore and dead people) so ultimately i just hope they're fine and those messages didn't fuck with their heads too much :(

alas, it is what it is and i hope the reposter doesn't come back and that random twitter users don't give mental credit to that user for my work. of course, i also hope nasties would just stop playing cop and attacking anyone who writes dark stuff >.<

(and that they don't come for me next, if they realise i'm the actual source. i don't need double the hate i already get x.x)

anyway. i guess i just wanted to share this because i've been dealing with that nonsense all week, which has resulted in a lot of inactivity on my side. i'll try to correct that and actually get back to interacting with people and making up dark little concepts and whatnot, promise ~!! also, please take this as my reminder to not steal other people's stories and work and repost it to sites you believe we don't frequent >.< it's incredibly sucky and demoralising and it'll always lead to stress on all sides so please don't >:(

to the beloved anon who informed me of all this and to whom i can't reply in lieu of exposing the reposter's identity: thank you immensely ;-; i'm giving you a warm hug and cookies and all of my love <3

[yryn-tania]

TIPS TO MY BLOG:

HOW TO NOT GET BLOCKED!:

- Have a banner!

- Have a profile photo! (Preferred, but if you have most other (positive!) things on this list I may not care!)

- ACTUALLY HAVE POSTS/REBLOGS ON YOUR BLOG! HAVING THE FIRST TWO ALONE WILL NOT GUARANTEE SAFETY

- MINORS DNI!! (I can't stop you if you lurk, but do so at your own discretion. There is content here that is not suitable for minors. You HAVE been warned!)

- Do not be toxic! Twitter migrants, there are NO ship wars or cancelling here! This doesn't instantly net a block, but depending on frequency/topic/content/threats(?)/ect., you may be at risk of a block! I will not warn you!

- Have a bio! No matter how small, just a little something goes a long way! Helps me (and others) tell you're not a bot! :)

DO'S AND DON'TS OF MY PAGE!:

As an artist myself, I advocate STRONGLY for giving credit where credit is due! If you do any of the following, depending on frequency and severity, there WILL be consequences!:

- Tracing without consent/credit

- Stealing art in any way! NONE OF THAT!

- Reposting without credit/taking credit! This is similar to stealing/kinda is stealing, but some people need this to be spelled out for them.

ABSOLUTELY NONE, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, OF THESE ARE TOLERABLE IN THE ART COMMUNITY.

Some minor things to this section include:

- AI generated art

- AI generated art mimicking a certain artist

- No "fixing" art! Please let others draw in PEACE! I will not stand for this, this ISN'T TWITTER!

ABOUT ME!:

Hi!! I'm Yryn, or you can just call me Aspen! I go by She/They pronouns! I'm autistic and have ADHD, and yes, these ARE diagnosed by a medical professional. Some other of my diagnoses include Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Depression. Before you ask, yes I am getting help, yes I am on medication, and yes, I'm in a much healthier state of mind than I was years ago. My anxiety is still pretty bad, but I'm not entirely debilitated by it anymore.

I'm an artist from Canada, with my preferred medium for choice being paper and pencils. I also love using my nice Copic markers, acrylic or watercolour paints, among many other mediums! I am also learning the guitar, and have been playing it for 4 years now! My current models I have are an Epiphone Les Paul, and an Epiphone SG Muse.

I'm a huge fan of that classic 80's-90's-Early 2000's rock/Alternative/Punk/Metal sound. Some of my favourite bands include Megadeth (I saw them live here in Canada!!), AC/DC, Metallica, (old) Panic! at the Disco, OK Go, The White Stripes, and stuff like that.

When I'm not doing that and not at school, I play lots of games! My main game, and the main "theme" of this blog is based off of my character from Final Fantasy XIV. I love that game to bits, and you'll be able to tell. Other of my favourites include the Yakuza franchise, Rainworld (my current hyperfixation as of writing this post), Portal/Portal 2, Monster Hunter (I play World and Stories 2), Slime Rancher, Overwatch, and many other games I can't list off the top of my head.

I'd like to get into commission work sometime soon, since looking for a part-time job has me at wit's end. If you know, you know, right?

Most importantly, on this blog, HAVE FUN AND STAY AWESOME!! Have a wonderful day/evening/night!

[firedragon1321]

Digimon Fragments Art Master Post

I wrote an OC Digimon fanfic a while back called Digimon Fragments, and I drew the characters. I decided to redraw them and put them up on Tumblr! There are two reasons. One- my old art was garbage. I’ve gotten better at working with digital art since I first drew them. Two- my original mirror for this art was Twitter, and Muskrat makes it less stable every time he breathes.

You can read Digimon Fragments here- https://archiveofourown.org/works/31089395/chapters/76810685. It’s rated M. Please read the tags and the author’s note in the first chapter. This post contains spoilers for the fic.

Here’s a preview with an older piece of the gogglehead, Oliver.

OLIVER

Oliver, the gogglehead of the group, is sweet-natured and gentle. He tries to keep a positive outlook no matter what. However, this causes him to be somewhat naive. He is easily overwhelmed by his emotions, ranging from getting easily flustered when teased, to intense panic attacks when things get rough.

Partner: Vorvomon, Lavorvomon, Lavogaritamon, Volcanicdramon

Oliver’s personally my favorite, but I like goggleheads, redheads, freckles, and softies, so this wasn’t a hard contest to win. I made a character sheet for him, which is old, but I’m reposting it so I have a solid mirror.

LUCA

Serious-natured Luca is the group's tactician. His brilliant mind allows him insight to things his allies don't pay notice to. Where he excels in intellect, he has trouble managing his emotions. His feelings can easily overwhelm him, though he tries to keep calm and serious at all times.

Partner: Jazamon, Jazardmon, Jazarichmon, Metallicdramon

Luca is the loner of the group and my second favorite. He really needed the fixes. This character sheet shows his original design.

SKYE

Skye is an athletic girl, who happens to be on every sports team at her school. She put her friends before herself, even when doing so would be dangerous. As a result, she can be a bit reckless. Her friendly facade hides the fact that her unselfishness causes her many problems.

Partner: Labramon, Seasarmon, Caturamon, SaberLeomon

Skye’s old art was really ugly, but this newer art is really growing on me!

PIPER

Piper is a nerdy girl who loves video games. She is the most excited about being sucked into the Digital World, viewing it as an adventure. Every new thing she encounters is a source of excitement and joy. Though she can be quirky and weird around people, that's just a part of who she is.

Partner: Penguinmon, Kiwimon, Deramon, Gryphonmon

Piper hasn’t really changed. You don’t know how detailed glasses are in Digimon until you draw them!

LILY

Shy and quiet, Lily is less of a people person than she is a creative genius. She likes to sew, and has created multiple projects, including a bag to hold her sewing supplies that helps the group out multiple times (not pictured here). However, she is also frightful, and is easily intimidated.

Partner: Floramon, Ponchomon, Pumpkinmon, NoblePumpkinmon

Lily originally had way too much shading because I didn’t know what I was doing. I like the subtler direction I went with this version!

COLTON

Colton is loud and obnoxious, and knows "every curse word knows to man" (which he uses liberally). But despite this, he has a soft heart that pities the weak and despises bullies. All of this combines into one impulsive individual, who will even fight Digimon to keep his friends safe.

Partner: Otamamon, Gekomon, ShogunGekomon, Plesiomon

Colton underwent a few minor changes. I like what his hair looks like now way better than the blob I originally drew!

[laviejaguardia]

So, you made a Tumblr blog

You're finally here, after seeing many screenshot on Instagram, and hearing many times this site is dead on Twitter. Here you are, and you got no clue how any of this works. That's okay, this should help

[these are just social cues about how this site works that us old users don't even think about but can feel confusing for users coming from other platforms.]

Let's begin:

How does this site work? Easy! The blood and soul of this site is reblogs (not to mistake them with reposting). Think of it as finding something cool and going "hey guys check out what my buddy did", except way less annoying because you can do it 300x times a day and no one will mind and actually they'll thank you for it. A reblog might sound like a Big Deal but it's the equivalent of an Instagram like, as in the currency of the platform.

What if I don't want to spam the dashboard? Then you can use the queue. Click the options on the reblog window and chose "add to queue", you can configure it from your blog options for when and how it posts. You'll find many users use tags that include the word 'queue' to signal that it isn't an "online" reblog, this is totally optional.

What about the tags everyone treats as sacred? Tags are mostly for your organization, but also for speaking your mind (keep in mind, it's considered rude to diss the creation/fandom/ship in the tags of a positive post! The creator will see it in their activity page and it's a bummer, keep your comments silly or positive. If you wanna vent make your own post and tag it accordingly with anti-fandom/ship/character). If you don't have anything to say on the tags of a reblog don't let that stop you! Reblog without tags, you can always reblog it again later if you came up with something to say (no, OP won't mind).

What about likes? Likes are more like bookmarks for stuff you wanna find easily later, maybe for a personal post of a friend. You'll find you can actually hide your likes page (as the people you follow) on your blog, that's the common practice. Litterally no one will go look at your likes page,,, ever. trust me, it's easier to just have it hidden.

On the contrary, reblogs and original posts tell people what you're interested in, what you enjoy/don't enjoy. This is what it'll decide if someone wants to follow you or not: what kind of content you'll bring to their dash (don't worry if it's not consistent, we'll get to that later). Likes are mostly just for yourself.

What are replies for then? Probably the least used feature. You can use it to reply to a friend's personal post, or if you have a question for OP that needs an answer. This is not like a Twitter or Instagram comment! They won't boost the post and the creator would rather you'd put that praising comment in the tags of a reblog. They'll see it in their activity page for sure 😉

How do I find blogs w juicy posts to reblog as a newie? Search a fandom/ship you like and follow the top blogs there, scroll till you find a post you like and follow the original poster. They might follow back if they check out your blog and see you reblog content they like and congrats! You're mutuals 💕

You can also follow tags and there's always creation hubs blogs that exist solely for the purpose of creating or rebloging gifsets and content of a specific fandom/ship.

Do timelines matter? Is it cringe to reblog old things? An unequivocal no. You'll find its hard to know when something was posted to begin with, and we love that! It doesn't matter if it's from a deactivated blog, if it's 5 days or 7 years old, reblog it anyways, you won't be judged because no one will look at the date it was posted either.

What is it this about "curating your online experience"? Just like Instagram, you can block people, just like Twitter, you can also mute/filter words. On Tumblr you can also filter tags. (They'll appear like posts w a message that they contain filtered content). And like neither, you can turn off all suggestions so you see stuff only from people you follow, in the order it was posted.

How do I do this? Settings > dashboard > preferences > best stuff first/include stuff in your orbit/include "based on your likes!" > Off/on as you prefer!

Next is tags and keywords, these will depend on who you follow and what stuff you're sick of seeing. Filter freely! No one will know except you and the better tailored to your interests your dash is, the more fun using this platform will be. Remember, this site doesn't have an algorithm that hides content from the people you follow based on your activity like other platforms, so don't hold back. (Filtered tags are also great to use like on twitter to hide spoilers or trigger warnings, with the added bonus that tagging those is a popular policy here, it can be more effective than on twitter.)

I'll give you a tip: if you've blocked someone but are still coming across their stuff in people's reblogs, load their URL as a muted word and say bye to their annoying content for sure 😘 I also use it for meme posts that start to get on my nerves.

What about those comments about the likes and reblogs ratios? Well, that's A Thing here. Like I said before, reblogs are the whole point of this site, so when in recent years people seem to have switched to only ever liking stuff (along w many other reasons. It's not one single person's fault), the site traffic has plummeted. This has been very disheartening for creators who started to feel like the fandom communities they loved and interacted with on the daily became silent audiences who are not interested in making the community grow or even engage with it. It sort of escalated from there.

The bottom line is that we all want to support and enrich the fandom/s we're in, so I wrote this in the hopes that it'd give new users an idea of how to best do it in this particular platform 💗

For more info you can check tumblr's official guide

[janiedean]

I feel bad for all the nice J*nsa shippers who like their ship for whatever reasons (tropes, pretty art, aesthetic appeal, whatever) and know it's not canon but get associated with the misogynistic Dany hating crowd who act like Jon being attracted to Ygritte is J*nsa foreshadowing because red hair (I guess Jon should fuck Edmure Tully too? Omg give me Dark!Jon getting revenge on Catelyn by seducing her brother!) Tell me something. I'm new to the fandom but was J*nsa popular before the show? And I've heard something about the OG J*nsa shippers being alienated by the new shippers who insisted it had to be canon and acted like the series is called, "A song of J*nsa #danysux." I don't find that hard to believe because I know people who are now ashamed of calling themselves J*nsa shippers. Like, at this point, it's not only rival shippers who hate it. Even Gendrya/Braime/Jon stans/etc have started disliking that ship. You know your fandom is a problem when people who have nothing to do with Jnsa have a problem with it.

me: reads this ask

me: iwastheregandalf.gif which I can't find now but

okay anon buckle up because I am sadly well-equipped to answer this ask but before I do lemme tell you dark jon seducing edmure to take revenge on cat is LITERALLY THE BEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD but *clears throat* ALL RIGHT THEN.

disclaimer: as anon says I have no issue with like the shippers mentioned by anon in the beginning and ngl I agree, I have ABSOLUTELY ZERO FUCKING STAKES in the j*nsa vs j*nerys war and the only het jon ship I gaf about is jon/ygritte and we all know where that ended up I just... have been here since 2011/adwd was over and all the fic around was just for the books under secret lj communities and asoiaf qualified for yuletide and I have... seen... things.... and I actually have like uh had... beef... with some people in there and I know things bc ppl who hated those others told me stuff so anyway *sigh* buckle up anon I'mma tell you the story of jon shipwars through the years

in order, the old gods help me here, under the cut bc this is long as fuck

when I got into fandom also given what numbers were on ao3 one ship was popular and it was sansan. no like sansan was lit. the only asoiaf ship on ao3 with more than 200 fics. jb had twenty when i checked first. jc had like around 100-ish because of the show but sansan dwarfed anything. I posted the first jon/ygritte fic on the ao3 tag and the fourth throbb fic and like the others were all reposts from lj kinkmemes. nothing was popular before the show except for sansan when it comes to huge numbers bc grrm doesn't like fic and it was all hush hush until the show made it impossible to control and that ship was the one with a huge enough fanbase it actually had numbers, so like... j*nsa wasn't popular in the way nothing else was popular until it got screentime on the show

now, that stated, j*nsa had a... fair amount of fic for a rareship which was mostly book-based and from og shippers that were there from before the show and liked it for what it was but literally none of them thought it was gonna be canon, like it wasn't huge or anything but it had a small but dedicated fanbase who did their own thing and thought it was fun/liked the idea but that was it

that fandom had their own niche of hcs that they cultivated and shit except that like... at the end of S5/beginning of S6 there was a surge in shipping for... well obvious reasons bc it was obv sansa was getting to the wall and that would have been all nice and good but a) it was the time puritanical shipping was starting to take root and the 'shipping sansa with sandor or tyrion is hella problematic' rhetoric had started to circle coming from sans*ery shippers mostly but I'mma not open that fucking can of worms here, b) while the ending of S5 had more of a theon/sansa spike, the j*nsa stuff started getting big

now here we have to mention my villain origin story ie: j*nsa fandom had this one stan whose name I won't make because honestly it's been years and if she's still around I don't want her to remember I exist who was a bnf, wrote for... the website that created the whole larry/carol thing etc who was really fixed on this thing that j*nsa was actually canon and started writing extremely popular meta about it. now you're gonna ask how do you know, I know because this person once wrote a meta named 'why robb stark is a dick' and I told her that it was really fucking bad meta and she took it so badly she kept on trash talking me on her blog/her podcast (I was apparently the insane robb stark fangirl l m a o good lord) and like that was when some sane ppl who argued with her informed me in pvt that she was basically harping on the CANON thing when they'd have been okay with like... it being crackshipping and that she was basically cultivating a hoarde of followers who were harping on them/the ogs and basically ostracizing them;

I would like to add that this person - before her tumblr got 'accidentally deleted' and remade it therefore deleted most receipts for, er, her so-called meta which included stuff like ned and cat raised sansa as a sexual object and only wanted to sell her like cattle - had at some point started a round robin fic thing where... some of the characters mocked openly said stuff that some of the og fans had said specifically targeting them and people in that side basically went harassing anyone who didn't agree with that specific notion

now never mind that this person basically coined an entire term to describe ppl who liked white guys and excused all their wrongdoings out of my conversation re robb basically lying about everything I said as if I didn't have the receipts and tried to sell shirts with it and it didn't work and like then she got kicked out of her own website because she was telling her commenters disagreeing pretty shitty insults (considering I was called psychotic for disagreeing with her that time I don't doubt it) I think at some point she stepped back from fandom bc idk wtf she's up to these days and I don't want to, but basically at that point the dam was broken and there was a bunch of puritanical shippers harping on anyone who didn't agree with j*nsa is canon endgame stuff

this also includes an incident when those ppl were like... passing themselves as throbb shippers and ended up trying to tell t*hramsay shippers off the theon tag based on moral reasons and I ended up arguing with all of them (and they were all from that crowd) which in turn landed me in contact with other og j*nsa shippers who were like detached from that fandom bc those same people harassed them away as well ssooooo fun

anyway when S6 happened everyone was high on it and whatnot but I wasn't gonna begrudge them that I mean... you shipped it for years, canon is delivering you, good for you, but then j*nerys happened

god j*nerys happened

aaand basically...... I mean personally I was there like are y'all seriously arguing about the best incest jon ship out there but like basically the j*nsa endgame side was like AH JON IS PLAYING DANY SEE IF IT DOESN'T HAPPEN, the j*nerys obv got defensive af and both sides were sort of alternatively shitting on jon/ygritte anyway and depicting any other romantic rship jon could have as abusive™ and during S8 it just got worse and like I tried to stay out of it but basically from what I'm seeing now idk how the j*neryses are doing but on the j*nsa one it's ah jon's gonna play dany anyway and she's going to go insane like in the show so SHOW TRUTHING EVERY OTHER WAY and like again denying that sandor exists or that tyrion exists and like I barely touch my corner (sansan) but I ended up arguing with j*nsa/th*nsa people on twitter who were antis and is2g it was white-hair inducing and I know for sure the sansa/tyrion shippers were harassed to hell and back throughout so FUN

and even if the show didn't go there now since everyone there banked on the jnsa endgame thing and admitting you're wrong is like... not a thing, they still haven't let go of it and attach to that ship any shred of evidence which honestly is grasping at straws half of the time (like... the sansa/alysanne parallels like guys please no) and which is why every other ship is starting to get fed up, attaching canon proof of stuff from other ships onto theirs see that batb argument and jb is platonic but jonsa is not nvm taking all the sansan stuff and throwing it on j*nsa but then denying that sansan has canon evidence (like guys I had to read sansa touching his shoulder when saying gregor wasn't a true knight wasn't meaningful and we were seeing things please) and blah blah blah

this also goes hand in hand with the fixation on like... villanizing dany at all costs and like is2g I have zero investment in dany or her storyline I don't even remember it and I don't particularly care abt her either way and sure af I'm not for j*nerys endgame but like.... some stuff I read is completely excessive esp when fixing on how she's a completely mad tyrant who's gonna have to be put down and like... guys no

(also there's some srs stannis hate in that corner which I honestly don't get why they even care abt stannis but I had to read stuff like ppl don't recognize that dany and stannis are the real villains in this saga and like........ idek)

I think most of the og shippers are gone or don't ship it openly bc they don't want to be attached to the drama but like I also think they're pissing off everyone else bc like... I mean a bunch of them also were down with sansa being paired with other ppl as long as it meant a good ending for her except those ppl were... like everyone but the ppl she has actual contact with in canon which meant that at some point sansa/gendry was a thing and like.... you can imagine why arya/gendry shippers & arya stans were fed up, and there's also this tendency to behave like sansa is the center of the entire saga which like these books is named a song of jon snow basically can we pls make peace with it and personally I've had it with both j*nsa and j*nerys people since they started with that dumbass JON/YGRITTE WAS AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP rhetoric but I'm also fed up with the total ignoring that sandor exists/depicting us as delusional and honestly I also was by proxy fed up from the harassing of the sansa/tyrion shippers soooooooooooo

there were also instances of 'well theon is an acceptable choice other than jon bc he can't threaten her' which... i mean we all know what that meant and I'm not even commenting it bc it's one AM and I have no force to but I don't have to explain why it's not a progressive take now do I

there were also metas about how cousin incest being legal in half of the world means that jondany is a worse incest and j*nsa doesn't count as such and I was basically there like guys please just fucking own up to it but honestly I chose to forgot where I read that and I couldn't find the link if I tried

tldr: no one wants to admit that it's not gonna be endgame which considering the amount of fic they have on ao3 is imvho useless bc they have more content than like.. anything I ship that's not jb or that's actually like canon *cries in joncon/rhaegar but I mean renly/loras is canon and has less fic than them* so idk what's the problem with enjoying that instead of insisting it's gonna be canon when not even the show validated it while show truthing anyway when the only show truthing that can be truthed is the small council made of minorities and possibly jon eventually fucking off with the wildlings but not like that but like most people who thought it wasn't gonna be endgame had left/were made to leave by the time S7 rolled by and at this point since wow isn't out yet everyone is fandom-grasping at straws to find stuff to discourse on and we're here beating dead horses *shrug*

so that's... how it is but I would again like to point out that I don't judge ppl on their shipping, I don't particularly care about this entire feud bc I only ship jon with ppl he's not related to in whichever way and I try to stay out of this mess bc I don't really care to argue with ppl who have already decided to bend canon to whatever they want and will have to realize that it's not what grrm wrote at some point but like I have a very good memory and the above rant is as objective as possible also bc again I don't literally have a stake in that race I just think romantic/endgame j*nsa is not a thing and that ppl should stay in their lane and not harping on other ppl who ship whatever in general but especially when their ship is the most popular thing in fandom in the first place /two cents

[bl4cklabyrinth]

Live Report: MY FIRST STORY TOUR 2019 Semi-Final at Kobe World Memorial Hall

Disclaimer: Take note that all of these reports were translated by ear, so there is no assurance of accuracy. Because of this, please do not retranslate my work. I am no Japanese or English native.

I am only reposting the relevant MCs from my Twitter thread for archive purposes. Please check my tweets to read more about my thoughts on the show.

Photo by Takashi Konuma | Taken from MFS’ official Twitter

Setlist

SE

不可逆リプレイス

Black Rail

ブラック・スワン

花-0714-(Re:arrange)

monologue

虚言NEUROSE

KING & ASHLEY

mine

君のいない夜を越えて

終焉レクイエム (Acoustic ver.)

Love Letter (Acoustic ver.)

LET IT DIE (Acoustic ver.)

Band session

無告

Missing You

Weight of my pride (Pay money To my Pain cover)

MONSTER

絶体絶命

ACCIDENT

モノクロエフェクター

REVIVER

With You

Encore

THE OVER (UVERworld cover)

LET IT DIE

ALONE

Story about Weight Loss

Hiro: Anyway, this has no relation (to the acoustic session) whatsoever, but didn’t I get super thin?

Kid’z: You did! Tell us more! You really did lose weight! Nob too!

Hiro: We declared during Hall Tour that we’d lose weight within one month, but we couldn’t do it. We made a promise though, didn’t we? I did my very best, you know?? I seriously gave it all I got!!

Kid’z: I’ve been avoiding carbs for a long time, and even tried diligently apportioning my meals and stuff like that. But before I knew it, I was already eating curry!

Crowd: *laughs*

Fan: How much weight did you lose?

Hiro: I dropped 6 kg.

Crowd: Ohhh! *claps*

Kid’z: That’s a lot!

Hiro: Amazing, right? On the contrary, I’ve always been fat.

Kid’z: No, seriously.

Hiro: I lost weight so that I can get fat again. I want to get fat so I lose weight. When I’ve lost weight, I’ll gain weight again. It’s a never ending cycle.

Kid’z: Don’t leave it as it is!

Hiro: I get told that all the time. I mean, I’m gonna gain weight before METROCK again anyway.

Kid’z: Isn’t METROCK great though?

Hiro: Can I say this? Why do they hold festivals at such a season?

Kid’z: Because (the weather) is cool? I once thought Doraemon was the one singing.

Hiro: Who you calling 123 cm tall?

Kid’z: Nobita-kun.

Hiro: I’m not the blue geezer.

Kid’z: He isn’t a geezer!

Hiro: He’s a geezer, isn’t he?

Crowd: *laughs*

Hiro: Generally, we release a CD around spring or summer. Then we start tour around autumn, right? From the beginning of fall, Hiroki starts losing weight. Little by little. Then, year end starts rolling in. By the end of the year, tour ends, it becomes production season, and eating Hiroki comes out. Hiroki enters hibernation, just like any other large mammal.

Kid’z: You need to stock up, right?

Hiro: Yep, so I can get through winter. Then it becomes spring again. METROCK is waiting for me, but I don’t want stocked-weight-from-hibernation-at-its-max Hiroki to be exposed there! Why do I keep getting told I got fatter or thinner every time?! Leave me alone!!!

Kid’z: But you did your best, right?

Hiro: ...Yep.

Kid’z: Good job.

Crowd: *claps*

Kid’z: How about Nob? How are you doing?

Nob: I lost 5 kg.

Hiro: You lost weight only because you were sick, right?

Kid’z: Because his tonsils were taken out.

Nob: I haven’t gotten my sense of taste back up until now.

Hiro: Don’t let yourself lose one of your most important senses!

Nob: Some time ago I had pickles and it was the best.

Hiro: What an old man.

Story about Poor Kid’z (figuratively and literally)

Kid’z: This story has no relation to anything we’ve talked about so far, but you (Hiro) started an IG account, right? During Hall Tour. Since then, you did a lot of things to me, like that game with the paper cups and the 10,000 yen you put inside one of them, which I played along with having good intentions in mind. I chose the right cup and you gave me the bill, but you revealed that there was 100,000 yen in the other cups.

Hiro: Yep.

Kid’z: ...I tried that with a friend. I was caught. 100,000 yen.

Hiro: Eh?? They made a winning move, huh.

Kid’z: I was like, “Oh no, what should I do?? Should I take it back?” I wanted to be able to fool someone, to get a taste of how it feels! So I started turning the cups around thinking I could do it like you did. When it was time for them to pick, my friend chose a different cup, and in my head I was all, “No no no, not that!!!” and eventually they got it...

Hiro: That person probably saw my IG post and thought you were an idiot.

Thoughts on Marriage

After Love Letter, Hiro and Kid'z talked about being excited yet nervous to play the next song, since it's been a while since they last played it.

Kid’z: Speaking of which, the person beside me seems to be nervous!!

Nob: *rubbing his palms on his pants*

Kid’z: Can I do a hand check? *touches Nob's palm* It's all sticky!

Hiro: Eh? You're scared of making a miss again? Like in Yokoari? Higedan. Ah! Speaking of which, Satoshi-kun got married! Congratulations!

H&K: *congratulate Nob*

Hiro: Eh? Official?

Kid’z: This is Unofficial.

Hiro: Ah, sorry. Unofficial. He got married, huh... There's been a crazy marriage rush recently... 

Kid’z: Yeah, it's been all over LINE NEWS lately.

Hiro: Right. back number, Higedan, Maple Chogokin.

Kid’z: You're mean for putting Maple Chogokin as last!

Hiro: No no no. *laughs* The marriage rush is insane, right... Right... Insane right... 

Fan: Do you want to get married?

Hiro: ...I don't wanna get married. 

Crowd: Eh???

Hiro: Do you? Someday, I assume. As for me, I don't wanna get married at all. 

Kid’z: *in a teasing tone* Is it because you don't have a partner?

Hiro: *taunting tone* Ha? Ha? Ha? What the hell are you saying, you.

Kid’z: Ah, sorry we had a little quarrel.

Hiro: Let's get a divorce first!

Kid’z: What the hell is this breakup!

Poor Nob

Photo by Takashi Konuma | Taken from Hiro’s IG post

Hiro: Anyway, are we good? You (Nob) still seem nervous. How are his fingers?

Kid’z: They're tender. 

Hiro: If I had to play it in a room like this, I'd be pissed.

Nob: *strums a tune*

Kid’z: It's that song!! It's definitely that song, right? Can you do it, Nob bear? Are you alright? You practiced last night without sleeping.

Kid’z: Give him your support.

Crowd: Cute!! You can do it!!!

Kid’z: The pressure on you is rising, huh.

Hiro: *in an old man voice* You can do it! You can do it! You can do it!

Kid’z: Eh? What was that voice? Father?

Hiro: *taunting tone* Ha? What the hell are you saying. Who you calling father, come home and I'll kill you.

Kid’z: Ah, sorry. Father, I apologize.

Hiro: to Nob You okay? Dududadududa~ (T/N: the intro of LET IT DIE) The last song for the acoustic session. Please listen, LET IT DIE.

Then, Hiro crouched down from his seat and kneeled, looked at Nob closely, and so did Kid’z. Nob stared back, aced the dududadududa intro and everybody clapped for him! However, Nob made a mistake towards the very end, playing the last string of notes twice. When they were walking back to the main stage, Hiro put his arm around Nob and teased in a mocking tone, "Hey, in LET IT DIE, in LET IT DIE, hey, during the acoustic set, hey, I was satisfied with the beginning, but in the middle of the song, hey, you made a mistake, right? Even if you were doing so well." When they got back to the main stage, Nob bowed down in apology.

Weight of my pride MC

Hiro: Your voice has been heard! There were a lot of requests for PTP, and in my heart, PTP is my eternal hero. It shouldn't be just us; so that he can also hear your voices, shout as loud as you can Kobe!!! Next song is called Weight of my pride!

Check out their version of the performance at Saitama Super Arena here:

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モノクロエフェクター MC

Hiro: How are we doing Kobe? I thought everyone in Kobe could handle it, you know? Aren't y'all drinking too much milk tea? Your nipples are gonna become tapioca if you drink too much milk tea, you know? Well, if you're sure you're not drinking too much then you should be able to handle it, so let's all dance together!!

Reviver MC

Hiro: Thank you so much for today! It's been a great day, I'm really grateful. I've always been alone. I've lost so many people I didn't want to lose, and I've let go of things I didn't want to part with many times. I might not be able to change the world with music, but because of music, I met the members, I met all of you, and it made me think that my life was pretty impressive. I want to believe it was my destiny to meet all of you here tonight, so let's keep walking together Kobe!!!

With You MC

Hiro: Thank you so much for today, Kobe!!! After this, the tour will be ending soon. Thinking about it makes me sad, but knowing that you will all be supporting us next year, and the year after that, and the year after that, and even after 10 years makes me feel very grateful. But there's one thing I want to say before today ends: Kobe, I love you!!!

THE OVER MC

Hiro: How was it? MFS' UVERworld. Did I become Hiroki∞? This song was really difficult. The way the lyrics jump, especially during the part before the last chorus.

Kid’z: I didn't learn that note.

Hiro: *emphasizes the difficult enunciation of a line from the song* Unbelievable, I had a hard time remembering it.

Kid’z: The instruments were tough, too. Even Nob was complaining, there were notes he had never seen before.

Hiro: I couldn't match the timing of the lyrics either. I had to enter at an exact time, 3 characters in one second!! If MFS were to do it, we'd go with a lower key.

Kid’z: You say MFS but it's your key, right? Your voice is hella loud you know.

Hiro: It's because if I'm alone, then it's not MFS.

Kid’z: Nah, we were able to match the key, but only you can sing it that high, right? (T/N: They seemed to have raised the key by 2 octaves)

Hiro: You guys thought the cover song was only Weight of my pride, didn't you? You're wrong! We did UVERworld but we received many other requests. There were a lot of PTP songs in the tags. Who else was it... Sheena Ringo, Oral, and King Gnu too.

Kid’z: Weirdly enough, B'z was highly requested too. 

Hiro: It'd be weird if I sang their songs.

Crowd: Sing! Sing! Sing!

Hiro: 萎えぇぇ！萎えぇぇ！萎えぇぇぇぇー (T/N: Nae is Japanese slang that roughly translates to “no” or “ugh” in this context) Wait a minute. Change the song.

Kid’z: *offended tone* Huh?

Hiro: Well then, sing a line that starts with A!

Hiro: You're an Ultra Soul Idiot. Do you know any other song apart from Ultra Soul?

Kid’z: Of course I do! Don't you? All of you? I love them more than anyone else, I'm even in the fanclub! こいよ！！

Kid’z: *sings a B'z line that starts with A*

Hiro: Gi!

Kid’z: Gi? *sings a line that starts with Gi* I told you, I can do anything.

Teru: Yu!

Kid’z: Yu? YUME JANAI ARE MO KORE MO SONO TE DE DOA MO AKEMASHOU, SHUKUFUKU GA HOSHII NARA KANASHIMI O SHIRI HITORI DE NAKIMASHOU, SOSHITE KAGAYAKU ULTRA SOUL!

Crowd: HEY!!!

Hiro: Oi, Teruki!! Why did you say "yu"?! You should've let him build up first before making him sing "yu"!! It was too early to make him sing that as the third song!

Kid’z: It felt really good!!

Hiro: Why did you say "yu" so quickly?!

Teru: I just made a mistake.

Hiro: Don't be an airhead!!

Kid’z: I'm really grateful!

Nob’s Redemption Arc

After their UVERworld cover, Hiro asked the audience what they should do next. The crowd started screaming different songs, to which Hiro said "I'm seriously fine with anything." Nob suddenly played the first three notes of LET IT DIE, to which Hiro said, "Ah, from earlier?" Kid'z said, "He made a mistake a while ago, so let's give him another chance." Then Nob started practicing. The crowd screamed, "You can do it!!!" then Nob walked towards the center stage and did a moonwalk. Hiro was all, "You can't do it, you're not Michael Jackson!" then sang a MJ line and howled his signature "Woo!"

Final MC

Hiro: Today was truly an amazing day, thank you all so much. We had such an intense gathering here at Kobe World Memorial Hall. The first Coming Kobe was also held here. We have so, so, so many memories here in this place. Right now, we're still on our way to reaching our dream. From hereon, we don't know if we could make such a big dream come true. We still have a long way there, but we're doing our best every year, making music for everyone and visiting various places as well. Next year, and the year after that, and even after 10 years, it would be nice if we could all make amazing memories together. Thank you so much! We're definitely coming back, Kobe!!

Photo by Takashi Konuma | Taken from Hiro’s IG post

[go-diane-winchester]

A Generational study of Misha's wackydoodle fanbase.

This was the first post I ever did, on my blog.  The post did very well, and that was because the hellers were reblogging and adding their own captions to the post, and other dumber hellers were leaving a like.  So essentially they were creating traffic for my post without realizing it.  Because their nasty fingerprints are all over this post, I want to repost an edited version with updated information and less typos.  I remembered this post because of this interesting comment.

''In Twitter, in their own words, they have from 2 up 10 accounts. A lot of free time, I assume. I barely have time to enter tumblr xD''

Immediately, the Profound Bonds census came to mind.  I remember seeing a prominent amount of children.  And on one page, there was only one 37 year old.  I was surprised.  I wish I could use a screenshot of that page, but the hellers deleted the entire census.  I wonder why.  The above comment and the census, is the reason I am reposting an amended version of this. 

Enjoy!

Impassioned fans can be very annoying.  Like any fanatic, [in the words of Spike Milligan] they don't enjoy their favorite art.  They suffer from it.  However, most of the time, you find a way to chill with them, and you will be able to have a conversation about something or the other.  You might even share their enthusiasm, unless they start behaving creepily and nauseating you.  The hellers are the latter breed of freak.  They are the creepiest, most nauseating but most mobilized and active part of this fandom, because they have a hierarchy that operates their entire system.  There are influencers and drones.  Seeing an influencers will give you the impression that hellers are a group of grown women, however, that is not the case.  Only the influencer are older.  The drones are young.  Sometimes painfully young.

Understanding slash is one of the things that allowed me to understand why these people are so subservient towards Misha, and why they never question him.  There are other factors like his cult leader behavior, however, there is a particular group that he targets and he uses social media to do it.  Slash is almost a century old.  And each generation behaved in a specific way, regarding slash fiction.  The earlier generations were very covert.  It may have had something to do with modesty.  It may also have had something to do with “outsiders ruining our  fun”.  As far as Supernatural is concerned,  three generations of slash fans are represented. 

I am using the word generation here, from a marketing demographic perspectives, because this seems like the most sensible way to categorize slash fans.  Believe me, I am fully aware I am over simplifying this.  I am trying to write a short blog.  In no way, am I throwing shade at your generation.  I just like mine the most. lol!!!

There are three major generations in this fandom, that indulge in slash fiction:

Generation X:  These are slash fans born between 1965 and 1979.

Generation Y aka Millenials:  These are slash fans born between 1980 and 1994. 

Generation Z aka Centennials:  These are slash fans born after 1994. 

Generation X is that last generation of classic slashers.  This is a covert group that doesn’t like to share its artworks and works of fiction with outsiders.  If they remained underground and secret forever, they wouldn’t mind.  And if that mindset remained, nobody would even know that slash fiction exists.  As a member of this generation, I wish that things had stayed this way, but understand that society changes.  Its evitable.  Gen Xers usually don’t ship just one pair because it would seem a little foolhardy to pin all your slashy happiness on one pair that you put together.  There are plenty of pretty fish in the sea and we tend to mix 'n match.  There may be pairings we will like more than others, but generally speaking, we don't have issues with working through a cast like a buffet and enjoying different pairings. 

Younger generations of J2 fans were influenced by this generation's writings and therefore share the same opinions.  If there are any destiel shippers in this group, three suppositions are likely.  First, they are either, hidden away from social media and don't know about this death threat drama, and they don't have any frenzied love for destiel where it blinds them.  Misha is not influencing them via social media either.  They have a life and destiel is just their pass time.  Or, they are influencers who are older and therefore that sway the minds of younger people.  I theorize, however, that most of the destiel shippers in this generation deserted the ship and moved on.

The Y generation or millenial brought two changes to slash fiction.  From a western standpoint, this generation started to become inclusive and politically correct, making their work LGBT oriented rather than hetero/bi female oriented to the detriment of the artform.  The greatest irony is that mpreg [the last remnance of femininity] was born at the tail end of this generation.  My previous theory about this group was wrong.  I thought they were a quiet group.  But no.  All the Lua Jame's, Janelle's and Exorcising Emily's are coming this group.  This means that the influencers, the first users of social media in other words, are from this generation.  Perhaps, the normal non-criminal thinking, nice destiel shippers come from this generation too. 

Generation Z or centennials are the youngest generation, making them the least experienced, with the least filter.  They don’t think before they speak, but boy do they have a lot to say.  They tend to use social justice and politics to push the validity of their ship.  They are like junkies when it comes to their ship and Misha Collins is the only dealer they have.  They look for other dealers which is why they tend to ask all and sundry, what their opinion is with regard to destiel. 

They based their opinion of that person, on how that person responds to destiel.  Its like a pothead who only likes people who say that smoking pot is ok.  And if that person is indifferent to destiel, they will collectively attack that individual.  The only reason is because they are young.  Its only when I looked at their census, that I realized that many of them are as young as 13.  So most of them are children.  In Misha's heller army, these kids are the soldiers, bashing Jensen and Jared online and voting for Misha to win an award.  Lets hope their taste chances as they grow. 

Misha and his influencer, have convinced these people that what they feel is true, and because they are still young, they don't know any better.  Even a non heller might feel insulted by this analysis of an entire generation but believe me.  I am not critiquing you.  I am merely pointing out that your brain doesn't fully develop until you hit 40.  You are not a child, I concur.  But you are not a complete adult.  Get to my age, look back at life, and realize how many times circumstances forced you to change your opinion about various subjects.   I wager that about ten years from now, the hellers will look back at their behavior and cringe.  They don't know any better and the adults around them are not teaching them to do the right thing.

So Misha’s primary fanbase are a bunch of children, who are spread around the globe, and who don't affect of the ratings, have generally no money of their own so they cant buy seats for his panel or photo-ops or raise a decent amount for anything he is auctioning.  They couldn't attend Indycon so it flopped.  Not that he has that many fans to start with.  And they don’t recognize that Misha is trolling them with destiel, because they are too young to understand. 

Misha has the dumbest cult following ever, because he attached him to Jensen and Dean.  And Jensen doesn't even spend anytime with Misha outside of work.  So the shippy calling card Misha waves will catch fire in his hands.  He is also attracting children and they will grow up to eventually change their mind and taste in men.  The influencers are likely to stick with him, unless they get bored with the lack of Jensen and move on.  So consequently, Misha and his hellers wont benefit each other in the long run. 

I have a feeling there may still be typos.  Excuse them, please.

[minblush]

Leave mimi alone. If you could get over your jealousy for one second you would see would a sweet person she is. I follow her because she doesn't look for fights unlike blogs like yours. Yet there are fights on her blog cause of people who don't have anything better to do like you.

so it’s been a while and i finally worked up any sort of courage to address all of this and i will do it under this one ask because out of all the ones mimi’s “fans” sent me, this one was the most civil

i’m still shocked that i got so many people attacking me over rightfully calling mimi out, and ofc there is no jealousy involved, i guess i just don’t understand why she is the blog that anyone would want defend, like let me summarize

she only gets notes because she is fast with her updates, why is she fast? she just takes updates from twitter and twitter translators a lot of the time without crediting and without any factchecking herself

she spreads unverified information and rumours because of it and got into trouble because of it more than once

she posts sasaeng information and photos taken outside of official schedules in the boys’ private time despite being criticized for it (like the jikook vacation)

she also still has the fact that she “stalks” the boys in her bio, even though i know for a fact people told her many times it’s inappropriate in the context of the fan culture in korea

she is very ignorant about mental illness (the post where she claims that jimin suffers from depression and was saved from it by jin as a fact is still up btw), the entertainment business in korea, colorism and racism (she thinks “reverse racism” is an actual thing lol) and she spreads her harmful opinions by writing essays about it to her large following

what bothers me personally a lot as a gay person, she is one of those obnoxious delusional shippers and normalizes that behaviour to her followers and also fetishizes gay men to a really ugly extent (i’m not talking here about normal shipping BTW I SHIP LOWKEY TOO, it’s about boundaries though, i’m talking about writing conspiracy theories and fetishizing, FETISHIZING, treating sexuality as a joke and treating it like a commodity, direct quote from one of her very “funny” posts: “BTS is gay ! Shippers : Of course. Why would I stan straight boys ? Who does that ?”)

(and yes as someone said in the tags, apparently she also did make racial jokes and jokes about north korea etc, but i haven’t seen those myself, only saw people mention it second hand so since i don’t have receipts i wasn’t going to include it initially)

and that is all before the jonghyun issue, which i feel like is kind of a culmination of a lot of what i dislike about her blog

she didn’t wait for an official confirmation from SM and immediately started posting about his death, all actual fanbases of jonghyun and shinee waited until after the confirmation to actually post about it, because can you imagine if it wasn’t true (no matter how real it may seem?), just like other actual bts fanbases most of these serious blogs wait for official confirmations for anything, unlike mimi who just jumps on any opportunity for notes and for her to be the news bearer. you could see people asking her to wait until the confirmation in the notes of her first posts, BUT SHE DIDN’T LISTEN, instead she let her posts spread and only added confirmation much later when it came out (which is what she does in general, spreads rumours / unconfirmed info, then when confirmation or denial comes out she edits the post and apologizes in some extremely lowkey way, despite her getting the heat for it she keeps repeating the same pattern)

her posts were made from the point of view of a bts fan instead of a human being, she was extremely tribal by saying things like that “as a bts fan, as an army” i offer my hand to shawol etc, “jonghyun took care of bts”

then she made her post about saying how we should be grateful the boys are under BigHit and not SM, because bighit supports the boys in expressing themselves about mental illness and provides help for them, blaming the company and the entertainment business for jonghyun’s death, showing her complete ignorance, not only do we not know what bighit is actually like behind the scenes (do people not remember the scandal where one of the managers hit jungkook on camera?), but the issue is that this didn’t apply to sm anyway… because…jonghyun was very outspoken about his issues with mental illness, so were other sm artists like taeyeon or leeteuk, there was/is even a support group for idols under sm that these guys as well as others like onew or yoona were a part of

and depression isn’t that simple, jonghyun had friends and outlets, but if anyone has ever been depressed or suicidal, then you as i would understand that sometimes that doesn’t matter, depression is a serious illness and the illness just won in this case, this is an opportunity to spread awareness about the illness, to urge people to seek treatment as well (jonghyun sought it himself) not try to analyze and pin it on any company or any circumstance

yet mimi linked jonghyun’s death to being oppressed by his company, by having to hold things on the inside, as if he didn’t talk about it candidly and didn’t express himself in his music

what i also found distasteful but i also can’t prove anything and people grieve differently, i still raised my eyebrows because when she lashed out at people who got rightfully angry for her for using this opportunity for notes and to make it about bts and bighit, she revealed that she was upset and cried because she thought about how it could’ve been “one of her idols” that this happened to and that she didn’t even know shinee that well… she was very coherent up until that point, but when people called her out she started to cry and be very emotional and started to talk about how she had liked shinee since debut and jonghyun was her favourite (so she has been following them for like 10 years? that is longer than i have been into kpop and i am OLD and have liked shinee since 2009.. so she’s been a fan that long and doesn’t even know the basics of what jjong was like and what he dealt with?) and then went onto analyze his lyrics and talk about how she should’ve known, and her blog transformed into other people consoling her despite her being the person that upset so many people with what she had done… that stuff doesn’t add up for me, but that is just speculation since grief is different for everyone etc, it’s just something i personally can’t buy considering how she behaves online a lot of the time

she said she was sorry without actually acknowledging what she did wrong and after people defended her vehemently she actually changed her tune and started to say things like how it was a misunderstanding and even asked her followers to approach any people who were still “misunderstanding” and let them know, which,,, what even? i suppose i’m party this to thank for all the people that told me i was an ugly/jealous loser that should delete and/or die

and despite her being like this, despite her never learning from her mistakes, people still keep defending her and attacking people that call her out, and why? 

i would agree if it were one mistake, everyone always says.. let’s educate her instead of attacking her, let her learn from her mistakes, that’s what life is all about, right? i agree, people grow from their mistakes

but.. SHE NEVER LEARNS! she keeps repeating the same things, no matter how many times she gets in trouble, and you guys keep enabling her, i think it’s this culture of fans stanning other fans that creates toxic behaviour like this, why would she change? why would she learn? why would she start and mature, why? when she has so many people telling her that it’s okay, that she is right and everybody else is wrong everytime she messes up? i think people that send me those messages are complicit really

i just wonder, what will she have to do for you guys to see that she isn’t someone worth sticking up to to this extent, because due to this environment, she won’t learn?

is she the hill you guys want to die on?

i often see people saying that she does a lot for the fandom, but? she doesn’t actually do anything special, she basically takes from others and profits from them, if you follow actual update blogs that do their homework, like allforbts, ktaebwi, sweaterpawsjimin, or vlissful on twitter, you will see the difference right away.. those are the people that do work for the fandom, she redistributes and doesn’t even thank those that did the work, there are people that spend dozens of hours translating and researching, books worth of content, people that paid for japanese tv subcriptions so they can record those shows for you, those are the people that do a lot, reposting tweets, anyone can do that (and a lot of people do, which is fine as long as due credit is given, what i’m saying is… it isn’t special and doesn’t require any effort at all, so why worship someone for like… doing the bare minimum? and sometimes not even that?)

why would you guys go to such an extent to then attack people that called her out, and rightfully, you guys would tell me a person with depression and an actual fan of jonghyun, that “if you care about jonghyun so much why don’t you join him”

over mimi? over someone who acts like all that i described? is that worth it… i don’t understand this cult-like mentality, even if she were an actual angel that did save the fandom, what in the world would make this okay?

i now have anxiety every time i try to get on tumblr and will have to work to overcome it because you people told me to die over calling HER out while going to her and telling her how everyone else sucks and she is a lovely angel…

and why she doesn’t pick fights? i talked to her in the past and let me tell you… she is stubborn and won’t change her mind and when she sees she can’t out-argue and manipulate the person SHE BLOCKS THEM and doesn’t let them express their views on her blog, no she only lets views that paint her as a victim there, she doesn’t let her followers see any validand CONSTRUCTIVE criticism

that’s why she seems like she is above it, like she is only nice and the angel and people like me are scum for ever saying anything, she is very smart about that aspect of things. but she isn’t above criticism (and neither am i), she is a human being like me or you :/.

i’m not telling you to hate her or attack her, don’t please.., i’m just asking you to see her for what she is, someone who is notes and attention hungry, someone who refuses to learn from her mistakes and someone who actually flaunts her ignorance, please give your time and attention and thankfulness to people in the fandom that aren’t like that :( and mostly, don’t go around telling people that call her (or anyone) out to die like.. please?

if she wanted to defend herself she could always talk to me, or anyone, or address it in a constructive manner, instead of relying on her followers to do that for her while publishing dozens asks on her blog that praise her and tell her how everybody else is wrong

she isn’t a celebrity, she can speak for herself

the fact that she chooses to deal with things the way she does says it all, right?

just…please reconsider stanning other fans, it creates all this toxicity, nothing good comes out of it, that is mostly what i wanted to say

and she specifically isn’t worth all the hurt

thanks