#double co lets go (explode)

[chiistarri]

i think its crazy that some perachel shippers think canon percy would have chosen rachel over annabeth if she didnt stop herself from being a choice (their words not mine) ? did we read the same books ? love the ships you want to have happened but canon percy was enamored with annabeth like. canon books percy chose annabeth over and over and over and would have never picked anyone else over her romantically ?

[toytulini]

wheres that post about how its hard to have like a fucking depression spiral or whatever while knitting bc lemme tell u im sitting here fighting back tears while actively crocheting and its not fucking working

[thesparklingwriter]

an unexpected surprise

tags: smut, omegaverse, afab! reader, omega!reader, alpha!zhongli, consensual somno, pet names, reader is in heat, zhongli is in rut, reader pregnancy in afterword, idk if genuine excitement to start a family counts as breeding kink, I STILL think this is somewhat fluffy if not vanilla

word count: 4k (side note what the fuck)

a/n: is celeste doing a good job of hiding the breeding kink or no

masterlist | taglist

It’s scarily easy to forget, you concede. It’s too easy to just question why your stomach is killing you all of a sudden. Or why that stack of pillows in the living room is calling out your name like a record player on repeat. Or why letting Zhongli go on that work trip last week almost made you want to fall to your knees and beg him not to.

But once you realise it's your heat breaking, it's almost like your body doubles down. With Zhongli returning from his trip within two days, there’s really no point in worrying him with the information. His ever-righteous alpha urges would have him running home in a heartbeat, and you can't be responsible for that. 

So you call in sick to work for the next week, and if anyone knows why, they don’t question you, and you resign yourself to a horrible few days by yourself. You wear Zhongli’s clothes in the hopes that enough of his scent is left behind to cool your impulses a little. Still, it’s only so long before silk is the only fabric your clammy skin can bear, and since his pyjamas have been freshly laundered, there’s really no point in even trying. 

You reluctantly switch to your own clothes again, a silk night dress you've adored since the day Zhongli bought it for you, and focus on building a nest in the spare room to distract yourself. It works so well, in fact, that you wonder how Zhongli will ever fit between the pillows you've piled up —you subconsciously only made it big enough for yourself. The spare room is good because it's the smallest—in fact, it's so small that calling it a room is almost an exaggeration. It was initially an overzealous store cupboard that you ended up forming an affinity to during your heats, and while it was never a badly kept room, Zhongli couldn’t bear the thought of you using a cupboard when you were most vulnerable, so he had it remodelled. It was worth it to him, even if you were only using it 6 times a year.

This would be the third out of six heats this year, and you congratulate yourself on making it halfway through the year without keeling over and calling it quits. But making it through this one would be tricky. One of the many advantages of married life is not having to go through heat alone, and if Zhongli doesn't return home in time, you might explode.

You try to sleep off the anxiety first, surrounded by cooling silk sheets and everything in the house you can find that smells like your alpha, and it works for the first few hours of the night until a heat cramp rips through you and stirs you awake. Zhongli is many things, but above all, he is a doting alpha, and since he has your permission to help you in any way he sees fit during your heats, he has a very good way of satisfying that part of you before a heat cramp can even manifest itself. But since you haven’t experienced a heat cramp to this extent in what feels like years, you find yourself doubled over and whimpering in pain. The waves of agony even have you forgetting how it was that you managed your heats before you found Zhongli and his cool hands and doting kisses and perfect co—

It doesn’t help to think about him, you realise, as another wave of pain shoots through you. If you can make it downstairs to just grab a hot drink, maybe your symptoms will subside enough for you to just take matters into your own hands like you used to, and then you can decide how you want to proceed. So you wait until the waves of pain are retreating, and you take the opportunity to rush downstairs and rifle through Zhongli's stash of teas. He has labelled them meticulously, and even in your dazed, heat-addled state, you know to not disturb it too much. 

You find one that seems to be labelled appropriately and do the worst job of preparing yourself a cup to drink. You know he'd have an aneurysm if he saw you, but times are tough, and he’s not here to help you. He would probably be even more offended by the way you chug the drink, not even pausing to appreciate the notes and intricacies of the flavour as you trudge back upstairs and hope you find the energy for one orgasm to get you through the night.

It's tricky during this phase. Your body only desires carnal pursuits, but your mind is so riddled with anxiety that it feels wrong when you slide your underwear down past your knees, and your other hand gently brushes your nipple. It feels awkward to slip your fingers between your legs, to pretend that it's him who’s fucking you with his fingers, but it works, so you can’t complain. You tell yourself that you’ll clean up before you fall back asleep, but the hours of no sleep are catching up to you, and you fall asleep as you are.

When you wake up again, it's not from a heat cramp or because you need to use the toilet, it's because your heightened senses can hear the front door opening. You take a minute to listen before you panic—Zhongli isn't supposed to be back for another day, but when you realise that it's his steady but hurried footsteps that you hear, the tension leaves your body, and you relax. You don't have the strength to go to him, so you just hope that he finds you here, and he does.

He pushes your door open and glances inside, spotting you curled up in your tiny nest, stressed and anticipating another wave of pain. He feels horrible.

“Oh, my love,” he whispers, walking over to you and taking you in his arms. He carefully nips at your scent glands first and is relieved that from the way you smell, you're in your late preheat, so even though you may have suffered up to this point, it hasn't been the worst your body has to offer. A grateful hum slips from your lips as your eyes close in bliss, and his cool hands against your stomach seem to calm the heat cramp that was building up. “Love, why didn’t you tell me?”

“You were coming back anyway,” you reply, clutching at his shirt and capturing his mouth in a desperate kiss. “No need to bother you.”

“There was every need to bother me,” he whispers, gently adjusting the pillows around you on the bed and stripping off layer after layer after layer. He starts with his gloved hands, and the sight has you clenching on nothing, but you're just happy to finally have him to yourself despite your frustration. “You’re my wife, my mate, my omega. It is my job to take care of you. First and foremost.”

He reaches under you to pick you up, but you protest, grabbing his forearm. “I don’t want to move.”

Zhongli is hit with this unyielding wave of desire, so much so that he has to swallow his thoughts of you round with his child down before he speaks.

“Little love,” he shoots back, gently stroking your hair. “I have to take the contraceptive. Should I leave you here?”

“Don’t,” You say. You’d agreed that the next time your heat and his rut coincided, you’d be more thsn happy to explore the idea of having a child, but with the painful realisation that it might not sync up as fast as you want it to, you’re not holding out on luck.

“Beloved,” Zhongli shoots back, devastatingly beautiful, as you pull out the ribbon that holds his hair back. The image in his mind from earlier shoots back into his mind as he quickly contemplates whether he can take your words as they are, given the stage of your heat. If you were further along, you might say anything to get him inside of you again, but right now, he doesn’t think that’s the case. He takes your hand and gently kisses the inside of your wrist, a familiar action that makes you smile lightly.

“Don’t take it.” you repeat. “I don’t want you to take it.” You gently tug the ends of his hair to pull him closer to you, suddenly over-aware of the fact that your scent glands are begging for his attention. “Please.”

“I don’t want you to have regrets later,” Zhongli says quietly, and this time, when he leans in to nip at your neck again, something in his scent tickles the back of your throat, rich and almost spicy, and it makes you cough. His eyes shoot up to yours as realisation dawns on the both of you.

Zhonglis ruts are less common then your heats, with him experiencing only four a year compared to you. And if the last time they coincided was 2 cycles ago…

“Hm,” Zhongli mutters as you pull him into your nest. “That seems to explain things.” He had returned home early from this work trip for a multitude of reasons. At first, it was your reaction to him leaving, and then it was the dreams and constant thoughts of you that proved difficult to handle during important funeral proceedings, and then it was the thoughts of how you would look pregnant the moment he realised you were in heat. He should have realised sooner, instead of ignoring it and letting you suffer thus far.

“Sleepy?” he asks you, as you bury your face into his chest. But the most you do in the way of a response is make a soft humming sound, your omegan senses calmed by the knowledge that your alpha is close. He is upset by the fact that you didn't feel you could reach him when you needed him, but he knows now you need him more than you need an ultimatum. But for the next few hours, it seems like it’s just a waiting game. He is grateful his rut hasn't set in fully, or else the way you nuzzle into his chest might have driven him half crazy.

He gently strokes your hair, unable to tear his eyes from you for a single second—not only because you're the epitome of beauty to him, but also because he has been away, and he wants to take stock of everything. You once joked that he’d probably notice if a strand of hair on your head went missing, and although he’d laughed it off, he wouldn't be surprised if he could.

Your scent slowly begins to shift to something more sweet as you claw at your husband. You're not awake yet, and you won't be for a while, but you’d given Zhongli explicit permission to do whatever he needed to keep you happy during your heats, and he is always eager to please.

Even still, Zhongli takes his cues from you—if you’re grabbing at his face, he’ll kiss you for as long as you want him to, until you escalate things in your heat-addled slumber. And you do, breathy moans punctuating the kiss until you can take no more, and you're grabbing at his hips.

“What do you want?” Zhongli whispers, as he gently rolls you over onto your back. He’s been ignoring his almost painful hardness in favour of doting on you, but he refuses to forgo his manners the moment sex is on the table.

You whine at him, clawing at him some more, and he chuckles, gently pulling your nightgown up to your waist. He clicks his tongue at the sight of you, practically dripping for him, your underwear nowhere to be found, and as much as he wants to dip his tongue into you, he knows it's cruel to play with you in such ways.

“I know, love. I know.” He whispers to you as he gently enters you. You’re so wet that there's almost no resistance, and the breathy moan that slips out of you is almost too much for him to bear. His mind is almost immediately flooding with thoughts of fucking you into the mattress until you’re both so tired that it will take days to recover, but he would never do anything like that unless you were awake. He may have your permission, but he has his own morals.

“Is this what you wanted?” he whispers as you pull him closer, your head thrown back in silent bliss. Your response is in the way you clench around him, the slight whine in your quiet moans, and the way you dig your nails into his back. Gods, he loves it when you do that. And although it drives him near crazy, he keeps a steady pace until he feels his knot growing. He nips at your scent glands again, using the opportunity to whisper in your ear—filthy words that have you orgasming almost involuntarily, and the way you clench on him as his knot settles into place triggers his. 

He pulls you to the side so the both of you can lie down comfortably, and he is convinced that the satisfied look on your face as his knot keeps all of his cum safe inside you is enough to keep it there for another half hour. 

His estimations turn out to be correct, and by the time you begin to stir, his knot is still going strong. He talks to you as you wake, gently reminding you to not move too suddenly. You’re dazed but, more than anything, grateful for him as you pull him tighter.

“Thank you,” is the first thing you say when you wake up, gently planting a kiss on his cheek. The action, albeit mostly innocent, makes his cock twitch inside you, and you've regained enough of your sanity to laugh. “Rut?”

“It seems so.”

“Did you…?” your question trails off as if the process of asking is too tiresome for you. If he had, you would understand, but your anxiety is understandable. If he had taken it, it would mean you would both have to wait again, and Zhongli would be lying if he said that the idea of being a father would be unfavourable to him.

“As per our agreement, I did not.” 

The smile you give him is so… perfect that Zhongli has to look away before his knot returns with a vengeance, and he opts for pulling you into a hug, the cold silk of your dress against his chest. He wants to bathe you before the next round of cramps set in, otherwise, you will be clammy and irritable, and he learned very quickly that you cannot bear any discomfort that he cannot fix by fucking you during your heats.

He wants to run a hand over your belly, but decides against it, for fear of jinxing things, instead settling on pressing multiple kisses to your head. 

“How do you feel?” he asks you. He’s not entirely sure how far into your preheat you were before he returned home and he’s worried that he hasn’t been able to help all of the symptoms as a result.

“Warm,” you whisper. “How come I’m still wearing this?”

“As you remind me every cycle, doing anything but what an omega in heat explicitly asks of you is essentially torture. You didn't ask me to take it off, so I didn’t.”

You pout at him, and he laughs gently at you. His knot has deflated, so he slowly sits up and pulls you into his arms. “Will you fight me if I offer to bathe you?”

You shake your head no, lifting your arms above your head as he carefully drags your nightdress off. He decides to save himself the hassle of trying to get it completely clean and just get you a new one.

The minute your skin is exposed to the cold air, you wrap your arms around your chest, and Zhongli takes personal offence to that, kissing your arms until you move them, and then kissing your breasts, his tongue flicking out to tease your nipples. From the way your nails dig into him, he realises that's just about as far as you’ll let him go with the teasing, so he picks you up and takes you to the bath. It’s easy when you’re as pliant as you are now—any attempt you make to push back is easily combatted with words of praise and a gentle kiss to your head, and before you know it, you’re clean and dry and pressed up against your lover’s cool skin.

“Are you still certain about this?” Zhongli strokes your hair again, gently scratching your scalp in a way that sends satisfying shivers down your spine. “I can still take the contraceptive if you want.” 

“No. I want this with you,” you reiterate, pulling him into another kiss. You expect him to kiss you back softly, the way he usually does, but the fact he’s in rut has slipped your mind, and the way he captures your lips in a fiery kiss has a wave of need rushing through you. You gasp at the way his teeth graze your neck, the way his hands rest against your skin, still so gentle despite the fact you know he wants to be anything but.

A heat cramp comes over you so suddenly that Zhongli barely has the chance to register the change in your scent, but he’s quick to respond to your whimper. It’s cheeky of him, he knows, but he gently slides a hand up your thigh and lets it play with your clit for little more than a few seconds. Judging by how drenched you are, if he’d allowed himself to play for any longer, you might have taken matters into your own hands.

Zhongli whispers your name, although it comes out as more of a growl than a whisper, and you know he’s asking for your permission to take you the way he wants to—the way he craves. And even though he knows you’ll be fine, in fact, when you’re in heat you’re most compatible for a mate in rut, he feels the need to check. So when you reach for him and bite on his neck as hard as you physically can, he takes that as an okay.

It takes every single piece of patience he has to gently place your legs over his shoulder, and slowly sink himself into you. It takes even more for him to maintain a slow pace when you’re looking up at him like that, even more so when you moan his name in the breathy way he loves so dear.

“Safe word?” he asks through gritted teeth, and only when you repeat it back to him does he let himself relax a little. He slides a pillow under your hips, before whispering: “Brace yourself, love.” And even though he warns you, you’re still shocked by how hard his next thrust is—if you hadn't been in heat, it probably would have been enough to send you over the edge. His hands grip your waist so hard that in the back of your mind, you're convinced that it’s going to bruise, but the rest of your thoughts are blank, a dull hum in your head where words are supposed to be.

“Are you still alright?” he asks, as he moves his hands from your waist to your wrists.

“More. please, more,” you reply, and he obliges, quietly pleased with the way your pleas shift from words to loud moans and desperate whimpers.

“You want me to breed you, don’t you?” his voice is impossibly steady, his eyes trained on you in a way that stops you from looking elsewhere, even after he thrusts into you so hard that you want to throw your head back. Your whispered please is so faint that he almost doesn't hear it, but he does feel you clench desperately around him, and he's almost disappointed that he’s knotting you so soon.

The way you look at him is unfair. The way you scream his name as you orgasm is unfair, the way you close your eyes in bliss as he cums inside you is so. Fucking. Unfair. How is he ever supposed to win against you? You could ask him for the world, and he would create it for you.

“Is it safe to assume you’re satisfied now?” he asks you when you’re once again capable of speech.

“For now,” you respond. And even though you know it's bad to keep things from him, you don’t tell your husband that you don’t feel another heat cramp for the rest of the week.

~~~

“It has been less than a second since I stepped over the threshold of this house and you are already jumping on me.” Zhongli laughs as you barrel into his arms. He notes you smell different, but he can’t pick up what he is. As he picks you up, he thinks that you're slightly heavier than usual, but that could just be his muscles being fatigued from moving packed boxes of paperwork all day.

“You’re home early,” you smile, looking down at him. He manages to get his shoes off and walk you over to the living room, where you curl up next to him on the sofa. You have been increasingly affectionate as of the last few months and increasingly horny too, but you have those phases every so often, so Zhongli does not question it. They rarely last this long though.

He very quickly realises you’re wearing the replacement of the silk nightgown he got rid of during your last heat. He made sure it was a one-to-one replacement, but it fits differently on you now. Not a bad difference, it’s a perfect difference, he concludes.

“I missed you, my love.” he kisses you softly. “More than should be humanely possible.”

Your husband's brain has been replaced with a rock, you decide. 

“I think we need to look at remodelling the fourth room,” you smile, gently pushing Zhongli to get him to sit with his back against the arm rest of the sofa.

“The room that conjoins ours?” Zhongli replies. “Why would we need to do that?”

You sit between his legs, your back against his chest, your head tilted lightly to the side so he can kiss your neck the way he always does. But this time, he hovers before he kisses you, and you use his sudden pause to take his hands and place them on your belly.

You feel his breathing pause for a second, and the silence that descends between you is warm and comfortable as realisation dawns on him.

“You’re…” Your husband is speechless for the first time ever. He sits up slowly, his eyes trained on you.

“I am,” you reply, turning around to look at him. You're shocked when you realise that he’s crying. “Oh, darling, don’t cry. You’ll set me off.” you cradle his face in his hands, gently wiping his tears away with your thumbs. He smiles at you, eyes shining with unshed tears and eternal love.

Zhongli doesn't reply; he just kisses you softly and pulls you into a hug. “I suppose I should add ‘mother of our child’ to my list of names for you,” he says quietly, pressing kisses into your hair, your cheeks, and your neck as you giggle at him. "I am certain you’ll be a great mother, deserving of every praise.”

You smile. “And you’ll be a great father.” you reply. “The best father our child could ever ask for.”

© 2023, thesparklingwriter. please do not copy, edit, repost, or translate.

notes: i have plenty of things to blame this on but I wont even start. can smut be fluffy...? is that a thing? is this enough to make u guys forgive my absence ?

[fgumi]

ꕥ ketchup; — jay drabble, wc: 887, genre: humor, fluff

it was supposed to be just another day hanging out with jay—like always. you were best friends, inseparable since you’d met. he’d always been the one to tease you, make fun of your clumsy moments, and complain whenever you dragged him shopping. it was the same routine. or so you thought.

but something was off today. a strange, unspoken tension hung in the air, one you were definitely not prepared for.

“are you seriously buying another hoodie?” jay asked, holding up the plain black hoodie you had just picked out at the store. “you have like, fifty of these.”

“i do not!” you protested, snatching the hoodie from him and holding it defensively. “i need variety.”

“right. ‘variety,’” jay mimicked, rolling his eyes but chuckling. “you know, one day, your closet is just going to be a sea of hoodies and i’ll have to rescue you from it.”

you laughed, pushing his shoulder playfully. “you’re exaggerating.”

he laughed too, but then, out of nowhere, you caught him staring at you. really staring. his usual smirk was gone, replaced by something softer, something… different. your heart did a weird flip, and you blinked at him, confused.

“what?” you asked, suddenly feeling self-conscious. “do i have something on my face?”

jay snapped out of his daze, blinking rapidly and shaking his head. “n-no, nothing. you’re good.”

he said it too quickly. suspiciously quick. you narrowed your eyes at him, but before you could press further, he grabbed your arm and dragged you toward the next aisle.

“come on, let’s finish up before you bankrupt yourself,” he said, his voice almost nervous.

later, when you both decided to grab something to eat, the weird tension hadn’t gone away. you were seated across from each other at the diner, laughing about a funny meme you’d seen, when suddenly, out of nowhere, jay reached across the table and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. it was such a simple gesture, but it sent your brain into complete chaos.

you froze, your eyes wide. “uh… what are you doing?”

jay, equally frozen, blinked like he had no idea what just happened either. “i—I don’t know.”

you both stared at each other in silence for a beat, the moment feeling oddly charged. then, the realization hit you like a freight train.

oh no.

did you… like jay?

suddenly, your entire dynamic felt different, like the world had shifted, and now you couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that his hand had just brushed against your cheek. and how nice it felt.

“are we…” you started, not even knowing where to begin with that sentence. “is this… weird?”

jay blinked, looking equally panicked. “i—uh, no? i don’t know. maybe?”

the two of you sat there in awkward silence, both of you clearly trying to process what the heck was happening. the food came, but neither of you made a move to eat.

and then, chaos struck.

jay, in his anxious state, reached for the ketchup bottle a little too aggressively. the cap wasn’t screwed on properly, and the next thing you knew, ketchup exploded all over the table—and on you.

you gasped, staring at your now ketchup-stained shirt. jay’s eyes widened in horror.

“oh my god,” he whispered, completely mortified. “i—I didn’t mean to—”

you burst out laughing. the absurdity of the situation, the chaos of the moment, and the strange tension between you suddenly felt too much, and you couldn’t help but laugh.

jay, still wide-eyed, looked at you like you’d lost your mind. “are you… laughing?”

“y-yes,” you choked out, trying to wipe ketchup off your face. “this is just—this whole day is a mess!”

he blinked, and then, to your surprise, he started laughing too. hard. the tension broke, and soon, the two of you were doubled over, laughing so hard you could barely breathe.

when you finally managed to calm down, jay glanced over at you, his expression softening as he wiped a tear from his eye. “you know, even covered in ketchup, you’re kind of cute.”

your heart did another flip, but this time, it felt… nice. comfortable. like this was where you were supposed to be.

“and you,” you said, grinning at him, “are a complete disaster. but i guess i kind of like that about you.”

jay’s grin grew wider, his eyes sparkling. “oh? you like me, huh?”

your face flushed, realizing what you’d just said, but instead of denying it, you shrugged, feeling bold. “maybe i do.”

jay leaned across the table, still grinning but now with a softer expression. “good. because i think i’ve liked you for a while now.”

your heart raced, but this time, you didn’t feel the need to run from the chaos. you smiled, leaning in closer to meet him halfway. “well, mr. hoodie critic, what are we going to do about it?”

jay smirked, reaching for your hand and lacing his fingers with yours. “i don’t know. but i’m pretty sure whatever it is, it’s going to be a disaster—and i’m here for it.”

you laughed again, shaking your head. “perfect. as long as you bring the ketchup.”

he laughed, and just like that, the world felt right again—messy, chaotic, but full of the kind of energy that only came with realizing that you’d fallen for your best friend.

disclaimer: this, in no way, reflects the idol. this is purely fiction. ✧ comments are appreciated! ✧ !nanamlist

[wet-and-wedgied]

Drew’s Diarrhea

True Story about one of my friends (with added details)

Drew smiled as he took a piece of brownie from the tray that had been set up for the college cultural festival by one of his fellow students. Drew is an average guy, about average height and build, a little on the thin side. He has really thick black curls. He was wearing an orange polo shirt with cream colored pants and a braided belt.

He snacked on the brownie as he listened to the baker explain that it was their first time baking, and they hoped that they turned out great, since they hadn’t followed any recipes or instructions. Drew assured them they were delicious as he finished up the treat, taking another and enjoying it as he headed on to his job, leaving campus.

About a half an hour later, Drew was at work when he felt his stomach churn. He bent at his desk, clutching his abdomen as it felt like his guts had turned into a boiling melting pot. He let out a low groan, then felt his stomach drop and a river of shit drop down his small intestine. Drew squeaked, clenching his ass and putting a hand underneath himself, just barely stoping his bowels from emptying themselves.

Oh fuck Drew thought. I’ve got the shits

“I’ll be right back,” Drew told one of his co-workers as he hustled to the staff bathroom and ran into the first stall.

“oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck,” Drew cursed to himself as he squirmed and desperately undid his belt. He yanked down his pants and his boxers, pooling around his ankles and sat down.

BBBBRBBBPPRRTT! A fat hot fart escape him, but did nothing to elevate the pressure in his gut. Another fart. Then two more PPPRBBFFFTTT! PppRBBRRT!

Drew held his stomach as his asshole opened up and a mushy column of shit blasted out of him onto the toilet. A cascade of muddy diarrhea followed, spraying the porcelain bowl as his bowels evacuated themselves. “Ahhh! Ahh!” Drew moaned as he bent, arms around his stomach as an other shitty eruption left his ass. Diarrhea poured out of him, emptying him out still he was left drenched in sweat.

Drew wiped himself and pulled up his trousers and washed his hands, going back to work.

… to come running back into the bathroom ten minutes later, slamming his ass against the toilet seat just in time as

BBBRRBBPPRT!

SLLESSURPRPPBBRRT!

“oh shit!” Drew called out as a cascade of bubbling diarrhea like a waterfall shot out of his ass. “What the hell is wrong with me—AHH!”

Another wave of diarrhea, thicker than before blasted out of Drew’s ass in an uncontrollable splattering against the soiled water. Squishy chunks of shit shot out rapid fire. Farts like machine guns were squeezed out, rapid fire one after another. He was then suddenly given a reprieve from his diarrhea. Drew’s eyes crossed and he extended his legs as a new thick log of shit hit his hole, stretching it out as it slowly pushed out of him, it was pleasurable and painful at the same time and then another cramp hit his gut and the massive log broke free, morphing from solid back into muddy and then watery diarrhea once again.

Again he was able to clean up and go back to work. And again he was back in the restroom not long after, his ass exploding with diarrhea.

It was Drew’s fourth trip to the restroom when things got dicey. As he entered the bathroom, he saw that the stalls were all occupied. It seemed he wasn’t the only one with an upset stomach. He doubled over as his guys twisted and he forced out a fat wet fart. He winced as it blasted out of him. Oh man, another round of the shits was coming and it was coming fast! He held his stomach, looking around, clenching his ass as he tried to make sure he didn’t shit himself. The stalls were occupied and none of them sounded like they’d be done anytime soon. But his dump was not waiting. The urinal! He winced as another fart boomed out of him PPPBBBPPPPRRRDTTTPT!

“oh man, I’m sorry, I can’t hold, I gotta—“ Drew said exasperated as he fumbled with his belt and rushed to the urinal. He turned around, dropping his trousers and yanking his underwear down around his knees as he bent ass first into the urinal, bracing himself.

PPPOLPPOSSSRRRPPERRT!

Drew gasped, his eyes crossing as a fire hose of diarrhea bursted out of him , arcing through the air and splattered against the back of the urinal. It came out as a relentless torrent of muddy shits, quickly filling the urinal as Drew’s lost complete control over his bowels.

Drew farted and moaned as he expelled the last of his waste, overfilling the urinal and sending the mess splattering against the bathroom floor. He nervously pulled up his pants, wiping himself with some torn papertowels and hurrying out of the bathroom before anyone could find the mess he had made with his bout of explosive diarrhea.

[mystwrites]

THE WAY I almost missed the deadline- I am here with literal hours to spare!🤣🤣. Your Sigma and Nikolai fic was so lovely! I especially love how you got Sigma's personality *perfectly*. Can I please request lee! Sigma ler! Dazai? (pooossibly romantic?). 🍇bcz neck raspberry supremacy and ✍🏼 bcz CUDDLES as an activity- supremacy. Feel free to decline this request because you just wrote for Sigma, absolutely understandable😊 and thanks for hosting such an epic event! I'll be with ya for the next one (preferably earlier next time🤣) Thank you!

200 Followers Event is CLOSED

Sigma was honest to god about to full on explode. Spontaneous combustion was seeming more and more plausible as of right now with Dazai clinging to him like a koala…in front of the other detectives nonetheless. Yes, he was accepted into the ADA but he was still undergoing his entrance exam. Was this a part of his entrance exam???

As he continued struggling, he caught sight of Atsushi, someone he’s become quite close with after Atsushi’s kind words to him amidst their brief interaction during the DOA incident. He grew to befriend Atsushi and genuinely felt a friendship forming. Maybe he’d be kind enough to save him.

“Atsushi! Atsushi!!” Sigma called, giving the boy a desperate look.

“S-Sigma…??? Dazai san…” Atsushi glared, clearly annoyed.

“Please!” Sigma begged, looking at Atsushi and reaching out. “Save me!!”

“Dazai san, you’re going to make Sigma more embarrassed…” Atsushi grumbled, feeling bad for the new co-worker. “Please let him go. I’m pretty sure Kenji needs to talk with him about his portion of the entrance exam…”

“Why? You jealous, Atsushi kun?~” Dazai giggled, cuddling Sigma more than one thought was possible. “Siggy kun loves cuddles!”

“No I don’t!! Not when I’m supposed to be working!” Sigma complained, struggling more. “C’mon!! Dazaiii!! Atsushi please!”

“Does our resident kitty wanna join?~” Dazai teased, grinning as Atsushi’s face suddenly changed from irritation to absolute disgust.

“What..? No! Just…ugh! Kunikida san is gonna be mad if you don’t let him go by the time he returns.” Atsushi turned away, frustrated. “Just…don’t kill Sigma with affection or whatever.”

“Wait! No! Atsushi please!!” Sigma shrieked, growling as Dazai giggled. “You chased him away!”

“He got nervous. He’s already in a relationship.” Dazai replied, burying his face into Sigma’s neck. “Just cuddle! I do this with everyone!”

“Do they give consent??” Sigma asked, glaring at Dazai.

“They do. They just act like they hate it but deep down, they love my cuddles!”

“Release me! Now! I need to go see the scary doctor lady for my next task!”

“…You actually want to see Yosano???”

“Yes!! I wanna be anywhere than with you!! Lemme goooo!!”

Sigma squirmed and struggled, realizing Dazai’s grip on him was too tight to make an escape. Sighing in resignation, Sigma went limp, suddenly squeaking as Dazai blew air against the back of his neck.

Dazai’s eyebrows raised and he blew another puff of air against Sigma’s neck, the younger squealing softly and shrugging his shoulders up.

“Dazai…”

“What?”

“S-stop!”

“What?”

“Doing whatever it is you’re doing!”

Dazai smiled innocently. "Sigmaaaaa."

"What?"

"Do you like raspberries?~"

Sigma was very suspicious now. He loved fruits, sure. Raspberries weren't his favorite fruits in the world and he only really liked raspberries if it was some sort of jelly on cookies or desserts. The way Dazai was starting this conversation however had him very, very cautious. He's seen how Dazai managed to trick Atsushi and the other younger members of the organization as well as others from rival organizations. He wants none of that.

"N-no...I don't!" Sigma replied, squealing and doubling his attempts to escape as Dazai suddenly blew against his neck. "HEY!!"

"So you don't like these?~" Dazai cooed, giving Sigma's neck another raspberry. "What a shame...what a shame! Atsushi kun, Kenji kun and Tanizaki kun say they like raspberries.~"

Sigma threw his head back laughing, nearly giving Dazai a broken nose in the process. He didn't hate this, but he certainly would've found this playful interaction more enjoyable if Dazai just told him flat out he was going to tickle him. Sigma just went limp all over again, rolling off of Dazai's lap and onto the floor before deciding to make his grand escape and run into the main office to ask for help in stopping the tickle monster.

A/N: The last and final request for my event has been completed! I do not ship Sigma and Dazai but take this in whatever way you wish. Now off to school!

[glitchcat808]

first time requesting on your blog!!!

can I request flower, lollipop, or ruby (Bfb) with reader that has a double life as a superhero and normal life as a singer but reader kinda forgets about a concert they had with (flower, lollipop, or ruby) and remembers when fighting crime in superhero form so they try to make it to the concert as fast as possible but the concert has already ended. and their co - singer just leave when they get in at the end out of anger but they forgive each other the next day

I almost forgot to add to make it a oneshot and angst to fluff

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

pls and thank you!!

OHHH YOU INTO SOMETHIN' !!!!

Hmmm, i feel like ruby will just get worried at us and flower will just get annoyed. SO YOU KNOW WE GOING WITH THE GIRLBOSS YES WE DO!!!!/POS

ALSO, since the request doesnt say any romantic/platonic relationship with the characters, i decided its best if i make the reader and the girly into a romantic relationship (hope it doesnt bother you!!/pos)

ALSO² [O/N] means Object Name, since i didn't want to make names for the members of the band, and didn't have an idea what contestant should be who (don't hit me the fanfic juice was running out 😭/hj/nm)

TW: SCREAMING, CURSING, VIOLENCE

Two jobs can be hard

Another day of crime, and it was already exahusting. You were going with your day, passing around the city, waving at citicens that saw you pass by, and many, but many fans asking for photos or autographs, and also the common fights with the evil, you know the deal.

The only thing you could thing was the concert Lollipop was making for tomorrow, preparing your voice was getting in the way because of the whole "saving the city" job you have. You didn't really think much on how you got this job, maybe because of the determination it gave you to save the people you loved, and future people you will care about, but that was too cheesy to think about.

While you did enjoy saving lives and stuff, you also love to sing. That was also a passion you had as a kid, listening to your favorite singers and hearing how they hit those high notes was amazing! Let me say that again- is amazing! You love to see the people get excited to see you, and after a long night of beating thieves that always brings a smile to your face.

Another thing you love is your girlfriend, Lollipop. She is the one that got you into singing, well, motivated, Flower took the idea after watching you do covers on the internet. She is there for you after vocal sessions, for rehersals, for anything really. She is also the bassist, and fans have said that she touches the bass like a "sigma"...whatever that means. But there is other fans saying you and Lollipop make a good couple, some say the sound of your voice and the notes your girlfriend touches are a total match! How cool of a compliment!

While you planned a list on what to do before the concert, you heard a noise comming from a dark hallway. It scared you to the point you jumped a little, getting into a fight position, not before putting on your accesories that hide your identity. Being a hero to a famous city WHILE being a popular singer and people seeing those two people are only ONE?? Not today!

You slowly walked to the hallway, careful to not make a sound that will make the moment get ruined. "Be a puppy, be a puppy, be a puppy" You repeat on your mind. If it was another thief, you were going to explode.

As you slowly got close to the thing that scared you, you carefuly got the flashlight you hid into your clothes, and pointed the light to the figure as fast as you can. The creature made a sound of surprise, looking at you like a deer in the headlights. The object had a black plastic bag into their hands, sparkles and shine getting into your eyes, pleasure of the flashlight into your hands. Both of you staying silent for a minute, shocked, confused, until the thief started to get up and run in a split second.

"HEY, GET BACK HERE!" You yelled, chasing after them. Some of the money getting into the way, but you pick it up with your powers. Oh, did i forget to say you can hold things with magic? Cool, right?

While you runned to get them, a singular candy was running in circles into the back stage. Looking at her phone every five seconds, checking at the hour and new messages, nothing can be seen. "Where is she now? She should be here since five minites ago!" Lollipop groaned, looking at the mirrow, checking her makeup. "I'm sure she is on her way, give her some time" Flower said, giving her friend some green tea she prepared for her. Lollipop grabed the cup and started to drink the liquid, and left the utensil at the top of the drawer.

You launched at the object, getting them on the ground. With one hand, you holded them down and with the other you used your magic and grabbed the bag and made a knot with all the stolen materials inside. The thief moved, but you punched them in the face, as they groaned in pain. You started to hit them more until they eventually calmed down, and finally, you used both of your hands to appear a rope, and tied their hands down.

"This is why you don't steal, you thief!" You exclaimed, looking down at them. "Don't say it like that, your not my mom!" The thief told, looking at you with anger. "You should have thought about the consequences before stealing, you know?"

"Yeah, but you should have thought about wearing that outfit, you Metroman copy son of a bit-"

The officer car turned the engine, as the sirens got into the background, getting quieter as the car moved to the other side. You stayed there, looking at how justice was served. "I don't look like Metroman, you little..." You mumbled into your breath, fixing your clothes. You started to walk back to your apartment, stretching your arms. "Man, what a day!" You said to yourself, looking at the stars. After all that trouble, you couldn't help but try to remember something important, but what could that be?

Groceries? No you already did that yesterday. Wash your clothes? Nah, you can do that later. Feed the cat? Wait, Lollipop already did that. So what could that be?...

It had something to do with Lollipop tho, so what can that mean?

...

THE CONCERT!!

You rushed to the stadium, running as fast as your legs could take you. Trying not to get hit by any cars, checking to see if you were going to the right direction, until you got into the place. You pushed the doors open in a second, looking around to get into the backstage. You runned to the back of the building, as you opened the doors with a leg kick. "I'M HERE, I'M HERE!! SO WHAT DO WE-" You cut yourself off, looking at the band's dissapointed, angry looks.

"So this is the time you get here? WHERE EVERYONE LEFT?!" The drummer yelled, dissapointed. Everyone looked frustrated, betrayed by you. "HOW DO YOU THINK WE GOT EVERYTHING DONE WITHOUTH YOU, HUH? WE HAD TO MAKE [O/N] SING FOR YOU, WHICH THE FANS DIDN'T ENJOY OR LIKED" "Hey, but i sing good :'( !" "SHUT UP, DUMBASS!"

As a fight happened, you looked shocked. How bad of you to forget about such an important thing, you just had to go into that hallway did you? You tried to look at your girlfriend for comfort, but she mysteriously wasn't there. She must have been so sad you didn't go that she just left...

"THATS IT, I'M DONE" The member that started the fight screamed, grabbing their things at leaving with a slam on the door. The other members decided to do that as well, there wasn't anything much to do anyways. They grabbed their instruments and started to walk, until the last member grabbed your shoulder. "Please try to come back more early next time, and don't forget about it"

That left shivers down your spine, but they just left you there. The door closed, and you took a seat into the couch. The soft material hitting your tired body, as small tears got into your eyes. You started to see blurry, letting out small sobs. You didn't want anyone to see you like such a mess, so you just got up the furniture after a little while. You were just about to grab the handle of the door, until you heard a familiar voice.

"Well, well, look what we got here. You left me down you know that?" Lollipop, it was Lollipop. You tried your best to wipe your tears, your clothes getting wet for this action. "Don't try to hide it, i already know" She said, her voice starting to show more dissapointment. You slowly turned around to her direction, looking at the ground. She let out a sigh, and walked towards you. 'Oh no, what have i done? She is so mad at me! Dammit, i should have been more careful about the time! I'm such a was-'

Lollipop slapped you, right on the face. Your head turning around for a little, feeling your face burn. Both from embarrassment and the pain on your cheek. Your girlfriend looked at you mad, so, so mad. She turned around, about to leave, until she tellls you something that breaked your heart.

"You should be proud of yourself, dumbass..."

The door closed, as you slided down the wall, getting into your knees. You holded your hurted area of your face, and the humiliation made you cry, cry so hard that you were going to have a headache. You cried about many things, about how you missed the concert, how you made your band members aka your friends dissapointed, and because the slap hurt like hell.

Next day, 9:00AM

Yep, you were right, your head hurt like it never did before. You woke up with a hurtful headache, blocking your eyes from the sunlight on the window. You just had to get ready anyways, same rutine anyhow. You washed your face, cleaning the dried tears, made some breakfast and got dressed. The sound of the door making you stop what you were doing, pushing your sweater down. You walked to the door, opening it.

It was Lollipop, surprisingly. She had a box of donuts on her hands, with a bag on her arm. "Thank god you are awake, i was not going to wake you up" She said, annoyed. You looked confused, didn't she slapped you yesterday? What did she wanted from you?

"Listen, i know you are thinking what i'm doing here. And i just wanted to say that i apologize. I should have been more careful of my actions, and talked to you about it" She looked into your eyes, bringing the box of food into your chest. You grabbed it, and made some free space for your girlfriend to get into the room. She walked in, and closed the door. Lollipop put the bag into a table, and started to get the things out of it.

"I also wanted to bring you something to enjoy while i take care of that pretty face. What flavor do you want?" She said, holding two cups of boba tea. You let out a happy gasp, and grabbed one. You hold the remove from the TV, and put your favorite show on.

While you two cuddled, Lollipop took care of your face. Getting some ice on it, while kissing it better. She later told you she wanted to get you to the park, and you accept the request. You both walked around, looking at the sky, trees, and animals that passed by. At the end, it was peaceful, you and her looking at the clouds on the grass. Sometimes pointing out funny looking clouds, or butterflies that fly to close to your faces.

It was currently the afternoon, both of you heading over to the apartment. You had her hands on her own, a smile on your face. You got over the lobby, and stepped in the elevator. Your girlfriend pressed the button to the fourth floor, and the elevator doors closed. Some calm music reaching your ears, making you more relaxed than before. You looked at Lollipop, her looking at the walls. Your hands reached for her face, making her look at you. You reached over her cheeck and kissed her, as a thanks for the day. She smiled, and side hugged you. Her warm figure comforting half of your body, and you liked it. Eventually, you had to fight the bad again, but that could wait for some more hours.

YAYYYYY, GOT BACK INTO WRITING AGAIN :DD. Man, i really missed writing my own thoughts so much! If any of you see a change on my writing, its because i want to bring more fun into it. So i just tried to included more scenes into the fanfic, hope yall like it <3!!

[rhyske]

ah! I read your Fenris stuff a while ago and it was so cute! if it isn't too much trouble could you write some domestic Fenris x reader!Hawke pretty please? take your time of course <3

This was adorable to think about, but also strangely hard? Because when I think of Hawke, I think of a chaotic gremlin who has people who clean and cook for them for a reason :'D

-----

Orana was going to have a heart attack.

She'd been watching you, quietly and out of sight, wringing her hands raw, for the past two hours. You've already come up with a thousand apologies to give her when you're done, and have already decided to help her clean the mess you've caused, but that was something for future you to deal with. Right now, well...

You're having way too much fun.

Baking always seemed so easy, in theory. Mix some things in a bowl, stick that bowl in an oven, wait a couple hours, and bam. Treats. What no one ever told you was that organization is everything. Knowing where all the ingredients are, and any help in the kitchen is, would be the difference between half a dozen eggs falling to the floor and, well, no half a dozen eggs falling to the floor.

Or a bag of flour. That your mabari immediately zeroed in on, threw their entire weight into, and zoomed away before any of you could get more than a single word out.

Your mabari is now an albino, and you and Fenris are now covered in layers of flour. Not to mention the kitchen that now looks like it was snowed in.

Bodahn was definitely going to have some choice words with you.

Shaking the baking sheet dry, you do your best to swipe clean a portion of the counter to lay it on. Reaching over and reading, for the tenth time, the instructions to make what should have been simple chocolate chip cookies, you hear familiar footsteps enter the kitchen.

"Did you find that rascal?" you ask, placing your hands on your powdery hips and looking over your shoulder to Fenris.

Setting the new flour bag on the counter, Fenris runs a hand through his hair, grimacing as flour dances to the floor around him. "I fear he's nowhere to be seen."

"Sounds about right." Grabbing the mixing bowl, you take the spoon and start portioning the dough onto the pan. "Though, shouldn't there be paw prints?"

"Leading right out the door."

Your frown smooths away as you feel Fenris' arms snake around your waist, his breath tickling your hair. Or was that the flour? "Well, at least we're not the only ones having fun," you chuckle.

"Yes. Fun."

You pause, registering that smirk in his voice, just as he blows the top layer of flour from your hair. A puff explodes in front of your face, assaulting your sinuses and throat as you gasp in surprise. You feel Fenris slip away as you double over, lungs burning as the coughing fit strikes hard.

A cup of water is quickly shoved into your hand, and you can only take one gulp before gagging. "Agh! I can taste it! Oh! Ew!" You try another mouthful of water with the same effect. "Oh Maker, what--"

The bellow that comes from Fenris almost makes you pause. Shoulders shaking, torso hunched, you watch through teary eyes as he laughs from his very soul.

You don't think you've ever heard anything quite so beautiful.

Fighting the smile and failing, you run to the sink to try to wash your mouth out. "Andraste's tits, Fenris!" You gag again, letting more curses flow from your tongue. "What would you have done if I'd died?"

"Death by flour." He chuckles. "Imagine how Varric would exaggerate that." Clearing his throat, he face smooths out, voice finding its even tone. "I would be the first at your grave. I have a poem already prepared."

"Oh Maker--"

"Co-written by Varric, of course. He took one look at my draft and improved on it. It starts with--"

"Okay, okay. I get it." Rolling your eyes, you shove the bowl of cookie dough into his chest. "Put the cookies on the pan while I think of my revenge."

His grin is full of smug triumph. "At your service."

[landofzero-archive]

Battle on the Sugoroku Board - The Die Has Been Cast 8

(Location: Cage)

Rinne: He~y, it’s the newcomer Rinne Amagi! Nice to meet ya!

………

It’s the newcomer Rinne Amagi! Nice to meet ya!

Madara: No response, huh? Apparently we’re not welcome.

Rinne: Oioi. We’re co-stars aren’t we? You don’t have to be so rude, y’know.

Don’t be silent and say something. If you keep looking down in the dumps, you won’t make it into a variety show. Is everyone depressed from getting out early?

Madara: Actually, it’s a program that would be better off if we left.

I was also killed instantly, so Rinne-san and I were taken away together. Honestly, if you don’t have items, it’s just a game of luck.

It’s the best part of “fun to fight, interesting to lose.”

Although, they don’t seem to be glaring at us because they lost the “Dice Battle.”

This is hypothetical, but. These idols are from non-ES agencies— non-ES idols may be wary of us ES idols.

I’m sure a small agency that’s appearing on an unknown internet program would be especially sensitive about that kind of thing, wouldn’t they?

“Are you going to expand into online programming and steal our jobs!?” …… It’s no surprise that some people are angry.

Well, we’re reaping what we sowed.

Not all humans are equal, but the world cleverly proclaims that “all humans are equal.”

There are even people who believe this, and avoid seeing the inconvenient truth.

However, it was the ES side who drew them into a huge trend and overran the existing industry. There’ll naturally be some backlash.

If they want to keep their distance, there’s no need to force our way in.

Rinne: You’re cold. In the entertainment world, that’s true.

Mikeneko-chan and I are “strays” within ES. If we all work together to liven up this boring show, we’ll be able to raise the stocks.

Madara: No, I’m a pretty smart guy. Wouldn’t it seem strange if someone thought I was close to NewDi’s management?

Rinne: Eh, is that so?

Madara: Yes. Otherwise, they wouldn’t want to accept something as suspicious as Double Face.

It’s a unit that’s like a powder keg– you never know when it might explode if it gets hit.

Since we’re in that kind of a situation, I’d like to go on friendly terms.

It’s not so easy to do all this.

Rinne: It’s a daily routine.

Madara: That’s what you say.

In any case, there’s nothing to do in the cage. Let’s have a chat and enjoy this casual atmosphere♪

(Location: “Battle on the Sugoroku Board” program set)

(CosPro Team’s Amagi and Mikejima of NewDi Team have surrendered.)

Ibara: (…… Hmm. It seems Rinne Amagi-shi and Mikejima-shi had an encounter and entered the cage.

Seeing as Yuuta-kun, who was in the same position on the GPS, is still alive, it seems he won against Mikejima-shi and ended things with both sides suffering damage.

The CosPro Team benefited from not allowing anyone but myself to hold the gold.

Unless our opponent is also using the zombie strategy, the difference will be felt in the final stages.

The problem is, when will Rinne Amagi-shi be revived? It seems like it’d be a good idea to leave him alone for now.

He appears to be able to get along well with the other participants— idols from small agencies.

The more time he can buy, the more time I’ll have to do my own research.

Especially in regards to the unknown idols booked by small agencies— I’m curious about how they were chosen.

Many of the promising candidates working at weaker agencies have transferred to ES agencies.

Idols who stayed at the small agencies don’t have impressive achievements.

If I understand the intentions in hiring them, the intentions of the program should become clear as well.

What was the production director, who once committed violent acts, thinking in calling them to be on “Battle on the Sugoroku Board?”

And what was NETV’s intention in hiring such a person?

If I understand this, then I should be able to understand whether NETV is a promising investment target.

When you’re investing a large amount of money, you need to have a good chance of winning.

As a strategist, my main focus is not on winning or losing the game, but rather on that—

At most, I’ll watch over you until the end, management of NETV……☆)

Previous | Directory | Next

[softspeirs]

Barren Soul: (16) Jumping In

Author's Note: First, a correction - I realized in the last two chapters I was simultaneously referring to Speirs as both a lieutenant and a captain, my mistake! I fixed those references in the previous chapters, and we see him get his promotion to captain and CO of Easy in this chapter. Second - this chapter features a few paragraphs which were the entire basis for this WIP and the first thing I ever wrote for Band of Brothers. I feel really emotional to see them here, now, with how massive this project has gotten. I really, really hope you all enjoy this part as much as I do, because it's so special to me. Lastly, thank you so much to everyone who has read and commented over the last few months. I know I don't always reply to comments right away but I see them and getting those emails makes my day. Thank you so much.

Captain Winters walks the line, too cold to sit in the CP or a foxhole longer than necessary. The men are holding up as well as can be expected with no supplies and barely any cold weather gear, but the only way to try to get any feeling back in your limbs is to go for a walk.

He stops to chat with some of the men as he walks, though many are trying to sleep while they still can. He frowns when he sees Roe and Spina huddled together, talking quietly. Kat is nowhere to be found. Normally if she wasn’t with them, she’d be with Joe Liebgott, but he just saw him taking his turn at the OP.

“Roe?”

“Hello, sir.”

“Are you missing someone?”

Roe sighs. “Kat doubled her rounds. Said she was going to D Company to scrounge.”

Winters looks toward the direction of the woods with a frown.

They can’t afford to lose someone else. If she gets lost on her way there or back… God knows the lines are changing every day, almost every few hours.

“There,” Roe says, pointing into the distance.

Sure enough, Winters looks behind him and sees a familiar, bundled-up form heading towards them. He takes a few steps, ready to meet her halfway, when he hears the telltale signs of shelling.

“Shit,” Spina swears, and then they’re all diving for cover, Winters sliding in next to the two medics.

“Stay down!” He hears the NCOs yelling, and hears the cry for a medic before Roe pulls himself out of the foxhole and into the woods. “Stay in your foxholes!”

Winters curses himself for getting caught this far out, he normally sticks with Nixon, but he’s even more worried because despite the calls for a medic, he only sees Roe, he doesn’t see Kat, and between the snow flying through the air and the trees splintering apart above them, he can’t tell if she made it through.

The whistle of an incoming shell is enough to set Kat’s heart racing as she realizes how loud it is. Headed straight for me, she thinks, but refuses to let herself panic.

Feet carrying her as fast as they can, she hears Shifty shouting at her to hurry up. Lip is screaming at everyone that the Germans have got them zeroed, and right then, the forest in front of her explodes.

It’s strange – there’s no pain. Everything goes white, and then blissfully black.

Read the entire chapter here on AO3!

[ambiguouspuzuma]

Mage-slaying 101

It was awful tough to kill a mage. That's the first thing they taught you at mage-slayer class. Lesson one: they're awful tough to kill. Magic can buy a hell of a lot of resistance to conventional attack, apparently. It's real good at deflecting magical attacks, too, come to that. Oh, and the mage will also be trying to kill you - something they tend to find ridiculous easy. That was intro to mage-slaying lesson two. The School had a lot of drop-outs after that.

Of course, being a mage was no picnic either. They had their own academic requirements - decades of practice and study, locked in a tower with a cackling mentor, alone on a swamp, something like that. But there was also a physical toll. Using magic took a lot out of them, sometimes literally, in terms of sweat and blood and tears. You'd struggle to make them bleed yourself, but the stuff would be coming out of their eyes and ears by the time they'd roasted you alive.

It was all about control. Balance. Magic was a whip made of fire, a double-ended spear, and it could easily come back to bite you in the rear end. Not only the consequences - when roasting an assailant, good luck keeping the flames from spreading to the room around you - but what you put into it. The mage provided the fuel on which it burned, and it was always hungry. It would take charge of them, if they let it, so they had to keep it on a short leash. It was all about control.

So Kufi had to make them lose it. That was the easiest way of killing them, or so the tutors said: only magic could beat magic, and it was simplest to co-opt the mage's own. If they sent that fire your way, pour oil in the other direction. Get them to over-exert themselves. You might be unarmed, but keep them engaged for long enough and their grip on that spear would be loosened. It wasn't impossible for them to end up falling on it. Not impossible, they said, as an indication of the chances of success. That was reassuring.

Easiest wasn't easy. Not everyone could do it, either. It took a certain kind of personality to push a mage over the edge. The School of Mage-slayers only took those kids with potential: the problem children, always talking back, always at the centre of a fight. The ones who infuriated their teachers, let alone their classmates. The School watched, and took notes, and spirited them away in the night. Having spent a few weeks with the others, Kufi felt like they hadn't really been missed.

Having been selected from a young age, the little brats with promise, the wind-up merchants in training, the School gave them training in cage-rattling and button-pressing, sparring with low blows and hurtful jabs, rehearsing for a fight that was by nature unfair. But if they perfected the art, not impossible would become inevitable. Once a mage was driven past a certain point, there was no turning back. The mage-slayer just needed to survive for long enough to get them there, and then get out.

There was little actual slaying, the tutors said, to various groans, jeers, and irritating questions: one kid echoed him in a mocking mimicry of his voice, there's little acTUAL slAYING, whilst another flicked her chewing gum in his hair. Once the mage had lost control, it wasn't wise to stick around and seal the deal. You just had to get them all hot and bothered, and they'd boil over, blow their top, flip their lid - really any metaphor for their head exploding. It would go off like a bomb, according to the photos in Kufi's textbooks. Every time - like clockwork. His job was simply to wind them up.

[thesinglesjukebox]

BONNIE MCKEE - "SLAY"

Will Adams unearths a pop time capsule and presents his findings to the rest of us...

[5.20]

Will Adams: I was aware of "Slay" ten years ago, even if it wasn't on iTunes. Through truncated live performances and interview snippets, I got the concept instantly: a big silly pop song that co-opted common Stan Twitter parlance of the time into a motivational anthem. But despite a stellar previous single that showed great promise and an impressive CV of hits penned for other artists, McKee's solo career seemed doomed to fizzle. With each passing month it became clearer that "Slay" would never see the light of day, so I couldn't fully embrace the song. I didn't believe I, myself, could slay. (Put less cornily and more accurately: McKee's label Epic didn't believe she could slay.) But ten years later, she announced her project to re-record her shelved album and release it independently, and the promise reignited. Then "Slay" dropped, and "reignite" felt less appropriate a descriptor than "exploded." Over a bombastic arrangement with a cadence and chord progression that recalls Hoku, the song is quintessential McKee: inspirational rallying cries ("come on, everybody, let's go!", "we can do anything!"); imagery that's punchy at first and confusing if given more than one second of thought ("flyer than firebirds"; "shine like razorblades"; "slaying like 1999"); a colossal bridge where she launches into the stratosphere and makes the song even bigger. And on top of that, spelling out the title in a pep rally affect. It's unashamed to be big, be dumb, be earnest, which makes listening to it in 2023 that much more impactful. It would be easy to cast "Slay" off as naïve yearning for the Obama-era college years, our wasted youth that might not even have been as carefree as we thought. But in spite of it all -- being hardened by a decade of Real Adult Life, of the awful shit that keeps on happening around us and to us, of the increased feeling of being unmoored from any sense of purpose -- I want to embrace it. You see, Dorothy, you've always had the power to slay. Before the 2023 release, I wouldn't have believed that. [10]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: ...iconic? [2]

Taylor Alatorre: As an incurable fan of the might-have-beens on the left of the proverbial dial, the impulse to stan a theoretical pop star is one that I empathize with. It can lead to some weird places, though, like pretending that this rewrite of Katy Perry's "Roar," shorn of its indie pop pretenses and with a muddier zero-to-hero narrative, would've lit up the charts as intended back in 2014. As with the hipster run-off of that era, maybe the wishfulness is part of the appeal. To the subset of the population for whom Bonnie McKee's unreleased album is their Dear Tommy, I'm sincerely glad you're getting what you wished for. [4]

Jeffrey Brister: We really need a critical reappraisal of Trouble, so we'll get less of this. [5]

Micha Cavaseno: The closest parallel I have to Bonnie McKee's musical career is actually the directorial career of Elizabeth Banks. Everything about it is perfectly functional but burdened with a trite and immensely DOA sense of humor that maybe had a chance to thrive 8 or 9 years ago but now just completely misses the mark. (If you overextend the narrative here, this makes the Pitch Perfects and Katy Perry stuff a kind of perfect parallel because they both thrive off the weird see-saw between conservatism and quasi-quirkiness. But I digress!) "Slay" is essentially a Cocaine Bear, because even if the punchline feels like a decades old meme, it's also slapped together in a kitsch from several decades ago. "Slay like 1999" while sounding like late '00s/early '10s pop nostalgia is a triple-double of identity crisis (made all the weirder by those subtle happy hardcore breaks at the bridge). It's so perfectly amorphous and logically commercial, yet also missing every possible mark? I'm not even mad it exists, I'm just more concerned how we justified it needed to exist now? [3]

Dorian Sinclair: Bonnie McKee has had a hell of a career and, in the process, been a writer on multiple all-time great songs ("Teenage Dream" is probably the crowning glory here, but let's give a shout out to Britney's "How I Roll" and CRJ's "Turn Me Up", two deeply underrated album cuts). I don't know that "Slay" is going to join that pantheon, and it's showing its age a bit after its release was deferred for a decade...but it's a solid song from a solid writer, and it gets me looking forward to her long-delayed second album, which is enough to be counted as a win. [6]

Ian Mathers: On the one hand, this really makes me wonder why McKee didn't just get to have Katy Perry's career directly instead of writing a lot for her. On the other... I don't actually like those Katy Perry singles that much, and all the goodwill towards McKee in the world doesn't change that this sounds a lot like them. [6]

Michael Hong: The further we get from "Teenage Dream," the less the American dream seems viable, the more it seems unattractive -- unfortunate for Bonnie McKee, whose music sounds like sparklers and stars and stripes all written in glowing neon letters. This version is just too theatrical; the way she sings the word "technicolor" is far too excessive. [4]

Daniel Montesinos-Donaghy: I naively thought we were doing away with this sort of label-mandated Search Engine Poptimisation, where keywords are stuffed into a song and its title, ensuring that it shows up at the top of confused uncles' Google searches until the end of time. Brazen, yes, but if you can give this songwriting prompt some heft, the shortcut is forgiven. Nope! "SLAY" (even the try-hard all-caps!) is engineered to make you think of different better songs you've heard in different better places, a cynical DayGlo casing that sounds like it was destined for a Buffalo Wild Wings Pride commercial instead of a major label release. Screw the SEO and dig deeper; there is better, organic, REAL affirma-pop out there, and you know it. [2]

Brad Shoup: Will this be the last pop song to reference Technicolor? "Slay" is out of step in so many ways: a widescreen arena-pop yearner in a time of grim partying, with a title that would have been in the pop vanguard when McKee originally wrote it. (In the video, she pulls the song from a synthwave vault -- door code 2013 -- and it's on a VHS tape.) It's really moving to see that McKee still believes in these big gestures, in the goofy metaphor that ushers you to the towering bridge. [8]

Nortey Dowuona: "Welcome to the part of the show / where we fake it 'til we make it." That's an irritating thing to say on a pop song. First, it's giving the game away. All pop is fake. It's the amalgamation of every genre, flattened until acceptable and accessible to anyone who would turn their nose up at the depths of it. Why let anyone know that you fake it? Second, it's an awkward line. The drum patter is kick snare kick-kick snare, and it lands so clumsily on that patter that it jars you either awake into "what, what does that even mean" or "oh ok, fine." It's not a sudden spark of wit, just a jarring reminder of the actual project here -- allowing you a peek into a swelling bubble of confidence. Thirdly, each lyric after and at the beginning of the second verse is as clumsily sung, as is the chant, but it feels right to have them in that way, and they turn to mush the way pop song lyrics should. They're not itchy and scratchy the way that first line is. Finally, because it's so revealing, awkward and jarring, the rest of the song fades once you hear it, since the hook, the drums and even the seething synth line jumping up and down the chorus, all melt into each other since they all cancel each other out. It don't slay, it just swipes. [5]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: OMG it's got a "spell out a word" hook I'm in love

Tara Hillegeist: Oh, so that's what Dua Lipa was missing. [7]

Alfred Soto: MARGO CHANNING: A mass of music and fire. That's me. An old kazoo and some sparkles. [3]

Katherine St Asaph: I got into an argument the other day with someone else my age about whether millennials are middle-aged yet -- they thought no, I think yes. My argument is admittedly vibes-based, swayed less by historical context than how many gray hairs I eradicated on that particular morning. But it's hard not to declare that you're in your midlife crisis era when you hear millennial Don Quixote-core like "Slay," which is only 10 years old but feels like an artifact from an ancient era with an equally ancient worldview. We all hear Katy Perry and "Halo"; what truly marks this as a genuine 2010s production rather than zoomer retromania is how many of the era's minor artists you hear. Specifically, I hear Catcall in the shouts, and MS MR in the way Bonnie McKee clips notes short. McKee's songwriting stakes out her usual turf, a lightly subversive yet unironically inspirational underdog anthem -- think the midpoint of Grease, Tank Girl, and Ready Player One, for those who too were raised by the television. Ultimately, though, "Slay" is a Bonnie McKee song that wasn't given to Katy Perry (or whomever); it's too easy to devise just-so explanations for why. Were the hooks too dulled, too inconsistent? Maybe, but so were the ones in "Part of Me." Were the lyrics miscalibrated -- too razor-blade explicit, or conversely too earnest and uncool? We have pejoratives for this sort of thing now: girlboss, Disney adult, Marvel fan. (Whether someone actually likes Disney or Marvel or has a managerial job is irrelevant to the online gaze.) But for every "Fight Song" and "Roar" on the charts, there was a "Government Hooker" or "Cannibal" in the album tracks that got even bloodier. The most likely explanation is luck: someone woke up too hungover to send an email, too sick for the earworm to take, too grumpy to want to reach for glory from the gutter. Whatever the reason, the song's nonexistence as an actual 2013 single adds another layer of subtext. Not only is "Slay" about seizing at a dream that's a decade dead, it's about seizing at a dream that maybe wasn't even alive at the time either. McKee deploys the firebirds and pop hooks regardless, and they roar to life oblivious but loud. We slay on, us aging diamonds. [6]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

[incarnateirony]

2p0 sweetie--

Ah, there it is. Now, after his M&G sources were burned, and everyone laughs at his magical WB source from the future, he's leaning on the great source of "people who got banned from a server for attempting a server coup hijacking admin permissions because they were told to stop being dicks."

No, Pat. Your ego wounded friend was told that the violations of the server rules of debate required actual arguments, not halfassed shutdowns. You can't go, "I DONT LIKE IT ITS DISRESPECTFUL" over nonsense. That's against the rules, and they chased and harassed people across four rooms entirely on the premise of a made up, unbackable rumor that came from you idiots mixing up two different songs. It was BRONLY RHETORIC because you guys started that rumor because you're idiots and mixed up said songs and couldn't discern Radio Co from Iced Earth. Any questions?

They got WARNED for harassment chasing users across four rooms. The VIOLATION was halfassed bronly rot brain "it's disrespectful because I say so" without substance or evidence. They were banned because they thought they could steal admin perms in revenge and tried to delete shit, simply for telling them to let people clown in peace.

Any more great sources you wanna pull out today buddy?

i know the banned asshole wants real bad to believe your spins even after you got blown out of the water this con, because otherwise, they were harassing people and got banned for nothing. Well, i mean, they ignored the public confirmations so far like you too but you really wanted to hide that M&G for a reason dude.

Y'alls grudges aint changing reality. cope. even if you guys get super salty, even if you double down on a stupid meta that's about to explode, even if you sit there perceiving killing me with your brain waves, even if you light a thousand candles, it is what it is dude, no matter how angry the banned morons are.

[royalcafee15]

The Ultimate Guide to Coffee Shops in Dhanmondi

Dhanmondi, a vibrant and bustling neighborhood in Dhaka, Bangladesh, is a hotspot for coffee lovers. With its blend of modern urban culture and traditional charm, it's no surprise that coffee shops in Dhanmondi are a magnet for students, professionals, and travelers alike. But what makes the coffee scene here so unique? In this comprehensive guide, we'll take you through everything you need to know about the coffee shops in Dhanmondi – from the best places to get your caffeine fix to the unique ambiance they offer.

Why Dhanmondi is a Coffee Lover's Paradise

Dhanmondi's coffee culture has exploded in recent years, transforming it into a haven for anyone seeking a cozy spot to enjoy a cup of joe. But it's not just about coffee—the blend of great atmosphere, excellent service, and mouthwatering pastries makes these spots stand out. Let's explore why Dhanmondi is becoming the go-to spot for coffee enthusiasts.

The Growing Coffee Culture in Dhanmondi

In the last decade, the number of coffee shops in Dhanmondi has grown exponentially. With the increasing popularity of Western café culture, the area has seen the rise of many independent coffee houses, each offering something unique to its patrons.

The ambiance is a key attraction: cozy lighting, comfortable seating, and modern decor make Dhanmondi's cafes perfect for work and leisure.

Wi-Fi and ample plug points mean coffee shops double as informal co-working spaces.

An increasing appreciation for artisanal coffee brewing methods like pour-over and French press is evident.

What to Expect from Coffee Shops in Dhanmondi

If you've never been to a coffee shop in Dhanmondi, here's what you can expect:

Diverse Menu: Beyond espresso-based drinks, you'll find pour-over, cold brews, and even locally inspired drinks.

Great Atmosphere: Whether you want to catch up with friends or work in peace, these cafes offer a welcoming and relaxed vibe.

Local Pastries: Many coffee shops serve traditional Bangladeshi sweets alongside Western pastries like croissants and muffins.

Top Coffee Shops in Dhanmondi

Now, let's dive into some of the best coffee shops that Dhanmondi has to offer.

1. North End Coffee Roasters

A staple in the Dhaka coffee scene, North End Coffee Roasters is well-known worldwide for its high-quality coffee beans. Their expertly brewed espresso and filtered coffees are a hit among coffee lovers. The spacious environment and cozy decor make it a perfect place for a study session or casual hangout.

2. Crimson Cup

Crimson Cup is an excellent choice if you're looking for an authentic coffee experience with a touch of international flair. The coffee here is robust, and their cold brew is trendy. It's also a great spot for grabbing a quick lunch or dessert.

The Perfect Coffee Pairings in Dhanmondi

What's coffee without something to nibble on? Many Dhanmondi cafes offer a wide selection of snacks and desserts that pair perfectly with their coffee.

Local Favorites: Samosas, patties, and other savory snacks are often served with coffee.

Western Delights: Pastries like brownies, muffins, and cookies are widely available.

Fusion Cuisine: Some cafes offer a unique blend of traditional Bangladeshi and Western dishes, creating a delightful fusion of flavors.

Coffee Trends in Dhanmondi

Dhanmondi's coffee scene is about more than just traditional espresso. New trends are emerging, and cafes quickly adapt to these changes.

Cold Brews and Nitro Coffee

One of the biggest trends in Dhanmondi is the rise of cold-brew coffee. Many coffee shops now serve cold brews, and some even offer nitro coffee—a cold brew infused with nitrogen for a smoother, creamier texture.

What Makes Dhanmondi Coffee Shops Unique?

Dhanmondi's coffee shops are more than just places to grab a quick cup of caffeine. They offer an experience that blends tradition and modernity, creating an environment where people from all walks of life can gather.

Cultural Influence: Many cafes incorporate local art and music into their decor and ambiance.

Community Hubs: These cafes often act as community centers, hosting events, poetry readings, and art exhibitions.

The Social Aspect of Coffee Shops in Dhanmondi

One of the most significant aspects of coffee shops in Dhanmondi is their role as social hubs. Whether meeting friends or attending a book club, coffee shops offer a perfect venue for socializing. With comfortable seating and a welcoming environment, these spaces encourage people to relax, unwind, and connect.

Why Are Coffee Shops in Dhanmondi So Popular?

Convenience: These coffee shops are located near educational institutions and office spaces and cater to a broad audience.

Diverse Clientele: From students to professionals, the coffee shops in Dhanmondi attract a diverse crowd.

Work-Friendly: Many cafes provide free Wi-Fi and quiet environments, making them ideal for work and study.

Coffee and the Art Scene in Dhanmondi

Dhanmondi is a hub of creativity, and its coffee shops often reflect that. Many cafes feature art from local artists, making them a place to drink coffee and a venue for cultural engagement.

Cafe Art Exhibitions

Some cafes regularly host art exhibitions featuring works from local painters, photographers, and sculptors. This supports the local art scene and adds to the cafe's aesthetic charm.

Coffee Shop Etiquette in Dhanmondi

You might be wondering about the etiquette if you're new to the coffee scene. Here's a quick guide:

Order First: Always order your coffee before sitting down.

Don't Hog the Seats: If the cafe is busy, be mindful of how long you're staying.

Use Headphones: If you're watching videos or taking calls, keep the noise level down by using headphones.

Conclusion

Coffee shops in Dhanmondi are more than just a place to grab coffee. They offer a unique blend of culture, community, and great food. Whether looking for a quiet workplace or a spot to hang out with friends, Dhanmondi's coffee shops have something for everyone. With a rich coffee culture and a growing number of cafes, this neighborhood is quickly becoming the coffee capital of Dhaka.

[kusogamesss]

AaaaaAAaaaAAAaaAAAAaAAAAA!!! -- A Reckless Disregard for Gravity

The captivation of the early Steam indie landscape can never be understated. Before the arrival of Steam Greenlight, the walled garden meant a very select few titles graced the storefront now resplendent with asset flips and low-grade eroge. Renowned games like Project Zomboid didn’t even appear on the store at that time — it and other indie darlings relied on Google Checkout and Desura for distribution. So limited was the indie space on Steam that days, weeks could go by without a new title. In looking for what underground, offbeat goodness was permitted, users invariably came across AaaaaAAaaaAAAaaAAAAaAAAAA!!! - A Reckless Disregard for Gravity, the first title alphabetically on the store. In Dejobaan Games founder Ichiro Lambe’s words:

“A name should be interesting, memorable, and descriptive — a game about jumping off of a perfectly good building in a flimsy wingsuit should be exciting. We had plenty of other ideas. The working title was Low Altitude, and we considered a bunch of others: Screaming and Falling AaaAaaAaa! Deploy Parachute for Hot Chicks Jumping to Earth From Tall Buildings Bridge. Antenna. Span. Earth. Falling Toward Earth Your Personal Crater Free Fall Don't Forget Your Parachute Remember Your Parachute Spicy Mountain Lion Freedom, Free-Fall, Freedom I Fell From a Building A few of those were obviously thrown in as jokes. "Deploy Parachute for Hot Chicks" was a dig at the industry's obsession with boobs. Spicy Mountain Lion was my personal favorite non sequitur. But when our PR/Marketing dude, Leo saw the list, he poked his finger at "AaaAaaAaa!," and refused to let me adjourn the meeting until I agreed to go with that.”

Though also available from Direct2Drive, GamersGate, Impulse, and WildTangent, the one-two punch of Steam's self-imposed exclusivity coupled with an ostentatious title made AaaAaaAaa! an enticing proposition for a couple years. Its inclusion in The Potato Sack on April 1, 2011 made it (relatively) explode in notoriety over a year after its initial launch. A crucial part of the associated Portal 2 ARG, many players, myself included, snatched up the game at its steep -75% discount and got to work inflating the player count, seeking clues, and nabbing potatoes for the ultimate goal of releasing Portal 2 early. Ten days after The Potato Sack launched, player numbers remained as high as 4,253, a number which would never be even approached again. By June 27, 2011, concurrent players topped out at 624. A year later, only 13. Since mid-2014, AaaAaaAaa! has failed to reach double digits. It has become a footnote of a footnote, a stepping-stone towards the contemporary AA indie zeitgeist of Game Pass and publishers and safety.

AaaAaaAaa! is reckless, an emblem of a sliver of a fraction of time wherein indies were starting to get the recognition they deserved. The polish of contemporary indies is absurd, their development cycles arduous, their teams an enormity, publishing rights are snatched in an instant. Finji co-owner Rebekah Saltsman in 2021 stated “Five years ago, I’m like, ‘Oh, I can make a game for a million dollars.’ And that was crazy then. And [now] I’m like, ‘I can’t make this for under four [million].” By contrast, Dejobaan’s marketing budget for AaaAaaAaa! was $0. With assets that seemingly fell out of a wallet containing lint and a single fly, AaaAaaAaa! and its ilk prided themselves not on their graphical fidelity or scale, but singular ideas explored maximally within small packages. AaaAaaAaa! isn’t bursting at the seams with content, but it didn’t need to. Like Zineth or Voxeltron or Darwinia, the aim was to present something new that hadn’t been explored within the games space as a sort of proof of concept, an offer of what games can accomplish.

As an in-effect sacrificial lamb then, AaaAaaAaa! is easy to dismiss as unimportant, as belonging to its position as a footnote’s footnote, but in revisiting it (having realised the kids of today know nothing of this time beyond its winners, its Super Meat Boy and Minecraft and Limbo) I was surprised at how enjoyable it remains. The gameplay is little more than falling while grazing obstacles and responding to simple button prompts. It isn’t good to look at. Yet it kicks ass in all the right ways. This first-person adaptation of BASE jumping evokes concepts of bullet hell with its tight navigation of enclosed spaces, of racing games in its sheer velocity, of arcade high-score chasing as you go for one more kiss, one more score plate. It oozes with risk’s rewards. It is drenched in text as an accessory, taking its overlong title and applying it to every facet of the UI and gameplay experience. It contains small nothingburgers of video chaos as if it is some valid reward in its own right. Image macros bespeckle gray slabs of polygonery. It is balloonshop’s Oreo, sounding not even half good but it is good, really Most importantly, it doesn’t wear out its welcome in the slightest, being just long enough to explore itself fully without the pressures of content bloat on the player. It would be reiterated upon with its semi-sequel AaaaaAAaaaAAAaaAAAAaAAAAA!!! for the Awesome semi-reconstructed with its long abandoned half brother 1… 2… 3… KICK IT! (Drop That Beat Like an Ugly Baby), mobilised with AaaaaAAaaaAAAaaAAAAaAAAAA!!! (Force = Mass x Acceleration) and is apparently being revitalised with the upcoming AaaaaAAaaaAAAaaAAAAaAAAAA!!! (if it ever releases).

It would be irresponsible to act like Superflight, Steep, Rush, and even Just Cause 3 haven’t trounced AaaAaaAaa! in nearly every regard with their years of hindsight to work off of, their immeasurable polish, and astounding budgets, but AaaAaaAaa! did it without a shred of shame, staying true to Dejobaan’s obtuse philosophies of making games that raise an eyebrow for their names, premises, and gameplay. It doesn’t blow my gourd, but it doesn’t need to. It’s fun, and it sits at the top of my Steam library for eternity. Jumping off of it into thousands of other games as I scroll and scroll seems fitting, somehow. It’s like Dejobaan knew they would be pioneers on an ever-growing mountain that forever shifts its form. It is a stratum fondly remembered.

[bananaff]

How to join gang beasts online multiplayer beta

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NOW RUN THE GAME AS ADMIN AND ENJOY MULTIPLAYER.Gang Beasts offers us a completely different action game starring weak characters made of jelly that have to try to fight each other on absurd settings. FIRST COPY THE (.V3-REVOLT) FILES AND PASTE THEM IN THE GAME FOLDER 8/10 (683 votes) - Download Gang Beasts Free.Gang Beasts is developed by Boneloaf, presented by Double Fine and available as a Steam Early Access release. Darren can hardly contain himself as he gets to play the hilarious multiplayer shenanigans of Gang Beasts online, in this fresh multiplayer beta. Written by Darren Gargette on May 31, 2016. I ordered a couple of press codes for me and my friends. Gang Beasts online multiplayer beta Quick Rinse. So when the news was unveiled that there was going to be an online multiplayer beta (Instead of the usual local multiplayer) some friends of mine and I were very hyped. Then, a new screen appears which shows the players character at the bottom. First, select the 'Online' option from the main menu. The steps to setting up a private lobby are simple, but not very intuitive.

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I have been loving Gang Beasts since its free alpha on game jolt. How to Set Up A Private Match For Friends in Gang Beasts. As intended by the developers, the experience is a co-operative horror game that is meant to. by Ashley Shankle The recent surge of Gang Beasts players has breathed fresh life into the multiplayer brawler, but those new and old to the game alike are both running into the same problem. While you cannot officially play Phasmophobia with more than four players, it is possible by hacking. Heres where to look if you keep disconnecting. a small independent game studio making a series of experimental multiplayer party games. Gang Beast Online Multiplayer Beta: So Far, a Flop. Gang Beasts is exploding on Game Pass, but its not without its growing pains.

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Gang Beasts is published by Double Fine™ and made by Boneloaf, Gang Beasts PC Game . Gang Beasts - Gang Beasts is a silly multiplayer party game with surly gelatinous characters, brutal slapstick fight sequences, and absurd hazardous environments, set in the mean streets of Beef. Customise your character and fight local and online enemies in the melee game mode or fight with friends against the gangs of Beef City in the gang game mode. Luckily, Valve has begun beta testing an all-new Steam feature, Remote Play Together, that lets users play locally-based multiplayer games online with others.

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Gang Beasts is a silly multiplayer party game with surly gelatinous characters, brutal slapstick fight sequences, and absurd hazardous environments, set in the mean streets of Beef City. Gang Beasts Online Unblocked Gang Beasts Online Players Gang Beasts 2 Gang Beasts Online Multiplayer Free Since the Gang Beasts online beta in August 2016, Boneloaf have been working with a small team at Coatsink to finish the content and systems for the full game, a significant part of this work has been to transition to Multiplay’s dedicated game hosting solution and Hybrid Cloud. Download Gear Beasts v1.0.8 + OnLine Download Gang Beasts With Multiplayer v Latest Version PC Game Repack-Games