#drunk and stupid

[irlplasticlamb]

why have gods forsaken me?

prints + merch + commission info pinned to profile :)

[dirtgrubber]

they’re so silly

[vulcan-moon]

"he did not say that!" "he did, and then--"

anyways, girlies gossiping

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

wintersberg date night with @heraxic designs......... they r refueling my wintersberg phase 😭😭😭

i think ethan would be a very emotional drunk

[merakiui]

texts i think the twst cast would send with the help of liquid courage. some of them don't even need liquid courage, but it is silly to imagine a drunk text from them anyway.

warning: some of these lines are excessively cheesy and also nsfw.

riddle - i want to study you like you're my notes and do you like you're my homework.

trey - are you a pastry because i'd like to fill you. ;)

cater - heeeyyy heeyyy wanna be more than /j? ;D we can be /srs instead. <3

ace - i'm in love with you.

deuce - can i take you out? on a date. not to kill you. i would never. you're really cool and i think we should go out like best buds do. you and me together. a date. for best buds. a best buds date.

leona - bed's empty. come warm it. don't make me wait.

ruggie - starving rn. lemme feast between your legs.

jack - can we be lifelong mates?

azul - you must be my glasses because i can't see clearly without you.

jade - mushrooms double in size every day. may i show you a special species that does the same whenever i look at you? :)

floyd - life's hard. essay's hard. dick's hard. :/

kalim - just so you know, i don't need to use oasis maker on you to get you soaked. :3

jamil - you'd look pretty wearing a collar with my name on it.

vil - you would look very beautiful tangled in my sheets. shall we make this opinion of mine a fact tonight?

rook - let me inside, mon amour. in more ways than one, of course. <3

epel - you're the apple of my eye... (the follow-up text: that was so corny. can we just fuck instead?)

idia - jk but not rly but jk wannawatchthisnewshowtogetherinmyroomjustthetwoofuspleasesayyes

malleus - child of man, allow me to bestow upon you a most glorious gift: my surname.

lilia - if you'll allow it, i would love nothing more than to give you a delightful green gown.

silver - would you be willing to sleep beside me tonight? i'd like to meet you in my dreams.

sebek - HUMAN. YOU ARE OKAY.......FOR A HUMAN. VERY OKAY. YES.

rollo - i yearn to kiss you and taste sweetness on your lips, and in return you can taste the sin on mine.

neige - you're really so cute!!! i wanna be more than friends. :D keep this a secret, though. don't tell (name)!

che'nya - you're purrfect in everything, but nothing is nyat bad either. lemme come over and prove it. ;3c

fellow - are you in the market for a husband? i know a great candidate. i'll introduce you free of charge! it's on me! (the follow-up when you ask if it's him: no, i'm talking about hellow fonest.)

[rattini]

the last thing your security camera sees before being hacked by that bald guy you keep seeing everywhere and his two weird friends (it took 3 attempts with combined effort)

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Chat have we discussed drunk chess with cherik cause i just think. That would be the darnedest silliest thing they could do

[studymaterialsstuff]

Sorry i raped you while you were drunk, i just couldn’t let go the chance of using your pretty body while you can’t even do anything:)

[turian]

tbh i wish new vegas had companion banter bg3 or dragon age style. not because i wanna see the companions being friends or whatever but because i wanna see them fight

[elodieunderglass]

So for some more details:

- I am fairly time-poor with a huge amount of commitments: Grownup Job Senior Promotion, three small kids on summer holidays/starting school, writing a novel fanfic for sick friend, peak growing/harvest season at allotment, etc. so im only offering “what I can actually deliver” at this time

- swan comic is a new idea, people like those don’t they? Not sure of how fundraising mechanism would work here but maybe taking prompts?

- not sure how essay would work but it’s probably my best/most appealing skill?

- material items in exchange for a minimum fixed amount. So offline I’m most known for material works. I’m not a BAD printmaker / craftworker and for this I would be looking at designing a sort of limited print run of greeting card style original hand printed prints. I know you guys aren’t familiar with this work from me, so this would involve a bit of trust that An Art from me would be worth at least £5 lmao. However it’s kind of nice to get something real in the mail right??

- super worried about fandom auction so this would be mostly a register of interest that I’d take to more experienced people and use as leverage to start an auction; I’m not in a great place to provide much actual legwork here. I also have huge guilt from like 2000-something where someone paid A HUNDRED AND LIKE 20 DOLLARS to charity for earthquake survivors and I DID NOT FINISH THE FIC AND I HAD to write to them, weepingly, apologising forever about it, and they were so graceful, they forgave me and wrote off my fandom auction contribution, but I had never watched the tv show they requested and was in the process of romancing dr glass and it all went SO wrong, this MIGHT heal my scars of shame from fandom auctions generally OR might make them worse. It itvery hard to write fic actually it’s my worst skill pls don’t pick this

Anyway

I will dance like a monkey and get sick kids out of Gaza. What would you like to see most?

[ten-years-late-with-fanart]

giving the grillby’s npcs a little bit of love. they’re awesoem

this is a panel of a wip mini comic thing

[fangirlintheattic]

THE BESTIES PARTY | Harlan Coben's Shelter 1x08

[andersonfilms]

riding abby’s thigh is all i can think about. she’d be the one to encourage it in the first place, stating it was a crime you never had. the muscles in her thick thighs flexing as your bare cunt took what it needed. her boxers soaked as you moaned out her name. god, abby wishes she could see your ass right now, but it was even better looking upon your stunning face, pretty eyes locking on abby’s as you come.

[blakbonnet]

Stede when he finds out Ed really really wants to get married

[justaz]

arthur has always been suspicious of the tavern excuse for merlin’s absences, but he has no proof on the contrary and when confronted merlin either tells him outlandish tales of near death experiences that have no chance of being remotely truthful or he admits to and apologizes for slacking on his duties to get drunk. one day, he decides enough is enough and he and all the knights go to the tavern with merlin and arthur casually brings up merlin’s history in the tavern and says he could probably beat gwaine in a drinking contest. merlin tries to divert the discussion away from the idea but arthur is determined. they receive a round of drinks and arthur pushes a pint of ale into merlin’s hands with a look of challenge. merlin’s options are to either commit to the lie to hide his secret or admit to the lie and risk exposing his magic. he takes the former. merlin gives lancelot a Look and then slams back the pint of ale with a minor bit of gagging and pauses to breath. gwaine already finished his pint thirty seconds ago but its entertaining to watch merlin so he doesn’t say anything.

merlin (built like a twig, rarely drinks, lightweight) is proper sloshed. arthur is almost vindicated but he needs merlin to admit it. he orders two more pints and gives one to gwaine and the second to merlin, instigating the competition further despite the fact that gwaine won already. merlin grimaces and tries to do the same thing again but only gets a few gulps in before he folds. he slams the mug down and gives arthur a kicked puppy look before admitting and apologizing for lying. arthur is Vindicated. merlin is still wasted.

the nights wears on and merlin feels the effect of the ale more and more every minute that passes. he sits between arthur and lancelot and feels almost unbearably warm but that could be bc of the alcohol in his system, or the crowded tavern. merlin looks around and watches the people that pass their table by while the knights talk and joke and laugh amongst themselves. merlin feels relaxed and excitable now, his worries seem to have melted away and he cant seem to remember why he was always so stressed and worn down before. he sees a game of [insert game here] (i was gonna say darts but google says that game hasn’t been invented in canon time so ill leave it up to interpretation) going on and climbs over lancelot to join in.

the knights watch with amusement and anticipate merlin’s clumsy attempts at [whatever]. oddly enough tho, merlin is a fucking god at [game]. a small crowd gathers and betting pools form and then challengers approach and put money on the line to go against merlin and merlin absolutely demolishes them all. honestly if arthur didn’t know any better, he’d think merlin was using magic to win bc there was no way his bumbling fool of a servant was that good at…anything.

the challengers take their defeat with honor and grace. the audience is a huge fan of merlin and they keep buying him drinks but he just sends them to the table for the other’s to drink. many people come up to him and flirt, maybe motivated by all the money he won that night or maybe just bc he’s merlin, and when merlin responds to them he’s………..he’s a real good fucking flirt? like could put gwaine to shame and he’s rejecting them???? how can someone come across so flirtatiously while turning down offers to take various beautiful people to bed??

arthur was already itching to intervene when people were flirting with merlin but he seemed to have a handle on it so he let it slide, but then people started touching merlin and arthur’s hand had drifted to his hip where his sword was usually sheathed. however, again, merlin was very skilled at escaping the situations with little to no conflict and he came back to the table with his winnings. the knights cheer for him and order more drinks with his money which merlin is too inebriated to notice and truthfully doesn’t really care about. his eyes are on arthur and if arthur thought watching merlin flirt from afar was bad then having him up close in his personal space, hands brushing against his arms and dark eyelashes fluttering softly against his pale skin, breathing his name into the space between them and licking his full pink lips was absolute torture and the worst and best agony he couldn’t even dream up.

[sov666sov]

Okay so HEAR ME OUT......

HC where Bi-Han gets drunk easy so alcohol makes him more ....

KIND.... AND .... CLINGY....to the point that he will cling at you like his life depend on you

The more he drink the more he...yk..do things that he sober will NEVER do

he like sooo easy to drunk that even few drops make him dizzy and he can mumbles sitting at table say some stupid shit ( i think it's funny)

Please see my vision i begging you

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