#dua re

[hewashalfofmysoul3]

Please keep me safe tonight Lord Thor, Zeus and Ra

Keep me and my family from your thunderous power

Keep my family dry and safe

Let my possessions stay from harm

Khairete

[daughterofsekhmet-bast]

Dua Re, lord of creation, father of all,

He who dies and is reborn each day,

The golden sun upon the horizon,

Who’s eye is Sekhmet-Bast;

As winter’s shadows grow longer,

And the shortest day approaches,

The people turn to you, oh Shining One.

Dua Re, be our light in winter’s darkness!

May Sekhmet, your Eye,

Turn her arrows of sickness away from us.

May Bastet, your Eye,

Protect us in the darkness.

May Hut-Hor, your Eye,

Bring us joy and revelry in your absence.

Dua Re! Dua Re! Dua Re!

[bookgeekgrrl]

My media this week (5-11 May 2024)

another absolutely unhinged episode from this crew. i love them all so much.

📚 STUFF I READ 📚

🙂 Lessons in Exposing a Deadly Alias (Cambridge Fellows Mysteries) (Charlie Cochrane) - this series is now the equivalent of watching criminal minds or some other long-running procedural: it's certainly not for the plot/mystery but for the characters who are family. I do love that as the series has gone on their friends & family have taken on a more active role in the investigations. that said, I think I might be done with this series; it took me forever to get thru this bc I wasn't remotely motivated to get back to it.

🥰 No One Likes Us But We Don't Care (Rainne) - 45K, modern Steve/prewar Bucky - an accidental interdimensional swap drops a 1940s Bucky into the present - he & Steve figure out what that means for them (3rd in a series)

😍 Spectred Isle (Green Men #1) (KJ Charles, author; Ruairi Carter, narrator) - [reread] very old world supernatural shenanigans in 1920s England - truly sad that there won't be any more in this universe because it's sooooo good and so rich but forever grateful we at least got this marvelous (and complete) story

🥰 it's good to see you back in a bar band, baby (LiarsandThieves22) - 139K, Steddie modern musician AU - absolutely adored this! enemies-to-friends-to lovers speedrun, understandable & character appropriate mutual pining, fantastic supporting characterizations - it had it all!

😍 You Should Be So Lucky (Cat Sebastian, author; Joel Leslie, narrator) - baseball player Eddie & newspaper writer Mark are both dealing with some devastating life events. They find each other and some solace and healing. This book, like We Could Be So Good, is absolutely incredible. It knocked my socks off and healed my heart. It almost made me like baseball! I'm just going to quote from a review written by kiki124 in the Romance Salon server because she is great with words and captured it exactly: "I was just blown away by the writing and the ways Sebastian drew these two utterly believable and interesting characters, plus all the side characters, plus the literary notes, plus the queer history plus the New York history. I think that what I love the best about these books is that the story doesn't end when the characters fall in love--there's a whole second half of the book to come as the relationship has room to breathe and grow and work out kinks. Literally everyone who has a heart and a brain should read these books."

💖💖 +115K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved 💖💖

the Steve Rogers problem (relenafanel) - MCU: stucky AU, 36K - "Bucky doesn't consider his Steve Rogers problem as a problem so much as the solution he hadn't realized he was hoping for to help him through the transition from the Bucky Barnes he'd been before his accident to the new, shiny version of himself. No, the problem isn't with Captain America and The Howling Commandos fandom. The problem is the amount of porn Bucky managed to write and draw about Captain America before finding out that he's less than one degree of separation away from Steve Rogers. 'Less than' as in he's sitting across the table from him."

📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺

Is It Cake? - s2, e4-5

Girls5eva - s1, e1

QI - series U, e4-8

Beyond Paradise - s2, e4-6

Game Changer - s6, e8

Strange Way of Life (2023)

Um, Actually - s6, e6

The Brokenwood Mysteries - s10, e2

Smartypants - s1, e2

D20: Fantasy High: Junior Year - "Rock The Boat" (s21, e18)

D20: Adventuring Party - "Blimey" (s16, e18)

Doctor Who - series 14, e1-2

🎧 PODCASTS 🎧

Re: Dracula - May 5: The Dead Travel Fast

Wiser Than Me - Julia Gets Wise with Patti Smith

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Sans-Souci Palace

Wait Wait… Don't Tell Me! BONUS - The animal that terrifies Peter, and other 'Wild Card' topics

Re: Dracula - May 7: Stranger in a Strange Land

Short Wave - 'Stealing The Past': A Spat Between Twins Leads To A Theory Of Disputed Memories

Re: Dracula - May 8: Foul Bauble of Man's Vanity

Vibe Check - Oh, How We Have Fallen From Taste

Re: Dracula - May 9: Castles in the Air

Today, Explained - Israel, Gaza, and Eurovision

Consider This from NPR - From utility man to one of California's foremost journalists

It's Been a Minute - A 'Wild Card' game with Rachel Martin

Wild Card with Rachel Martin - Issa Rae thinks a little delusion goes a long way

⭐ It's Been a Minute - Drake and Kendrick are beefing, but who pays? Plus, moms as our social safety net

Today, Explained - The real victims of Baby Reindeer

Re: Dracula - May 11: Pray for my Happiness

Twenty Thousand Hertz+ - TikTok’s Boom-Bling

⭐ Lost Notes - Go with the Flow: Community, Virality, and the Politics of Dancing

Why Won't You Date Me? - Love in Theater (w/ Jesse Tyler Ferguson)

Wait Wait… Don't Tell Me! - Chappell Roan

⭐ Big Gay Fiction Podcast - Baseball, 1960 New York, and Bad Dogs with Cat Sebastian

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Beauly Priory Wych Elm

🎶 MUSIC 🎶

'60s Sunshine Pop

'60s Folk Rock

Dance Party Hits

Carly Rae Jepsen

Presenting Charli XCX

Presenting Dua Lipa

Energy Supermix

Women of Electronic

Essential Proto-Metal

Rock Radio • 1980s • Popular • High variety

Presenting The Beach Boys

Classical Workout

Instrumental Hard Rock

[dashingwishes]

My brother’s best friend passed away in Turkey he was visiting his family there. The horrific earthquake killed him & his wife and 2 children and his mother as well. Please send your prayers/duas.

[missrandomdreamer]

Little space ace Hope 💚💜💚👽🛸

Levitating by Dua Lipa plays in the background

[raofmemphis]

“And like the dawn

You broke the dark and my whole earth shook

I was sleeping in the garden

When I saw you

At last, at last

Bones of my bones and flesh of my flesh, at last

You were the brightest shade

Of sun I had ever seen

Your skin was gilded with

The gold of the richest kings

And like the dawn

You woke the world inside of me

You were the brightest shade

Of sun when I saw you”

- Like the dawn, Oh hellos

[islamicspecialistforloveback]

Learn Here How to Win Lottery

Islamic Prayer To Win Lottery Jackpot, Winning jackpot is a pleasing experience. You wish to hit the jackpot every time you buy a lottery ticket. Hitting the jackpot in the lottery can bring you financial prosperity. Moreover, you can ensure a stable life with money won in the jackpot. There is nothing wrong in trying your luck in the lottery. Besides that, you want a stable and secure future…

[pemintalkata]

Bagaimana kalau pilihannya memang cuma satu?

Menjadi ibu berarti rela. Rela apapun in a good way tentunya.

Ada ibu yang rela melepas karirnya karena memang cuma itu pilihannya supaya anak tetap ada yang urus.

Ada ibu yang rela tetap berkarir sembari meneteskan air mata tiap mau berangkat kerja dan saat melihat anaknya tidur sebab rasa bersalah. Dan mungkin hanya itu juga pilihannya.

Ada ibu yang rela mengesampingkan mimpi-mimpinya untuk menemani buah hati tercintanya bertumbuh dan berkembang.

Banyak ibu yang harus rela memutuskan hal-hal sulit dalam hidupnya dan itu bukan sekali dua kali saja.

Beberapa orang mungkin punya pilihan untuk melakukan beberapa hal sekaligus tanpa harus meninggalkan hal lainnya. Tapi gak sedikit juga yang cuma punya satu pilihan dan mau gak mau memang harus merenda rasa rela.

Aku selalu sedih setiap kali melihat konten parenting tapi isi komennya selalu membandingkan antara ibu satu dan yang lain, anak satu dan yang lain, sampai cara parenting satu dan yang lain.

Rasanya seperti gak boleh kalau ada perbedaan sama sekali. Again, kita gak pernah benar-benar tahu hidup orang lain sehingga sangat gak pantas bagi kita untuk menghakimi mereka. Terlepas apapun pilihannya.

Mana yang katanya women support women? Mana yang katanya mom support mom? Kalau kita selalu berisik dengan urusan hidup orang lain.

Sesederhana support system saja pasti antara satu ibu dan yang lain pun berbeda. Orang terdekat yang harusnya ada saja (re: suami karena dialah ayah dari si anak), gak semua punya figurnya. Ada yang suaminya ada tapi seperti gak ada. Ada yang juga betul-betul gak ada.

Jadi perempuan hari ini selalu serba salah. Sedihnya yang menyalahkan juga sesama perempuan.

Bukankah kita harusnya saling dukung karena terkadang kita juga merasa kesulitan ada di posisi saat ini. Dan mungkin ada yang memang terpaksa harus ada di posisinya karena ya gak ada pilihan lain.

So, be wise dengan ketikan, ucapan, dan lain sebagainya. Kita gak pernah tahu titik lelah seseorang. Bisa jadi mereka terlihat kuat tapi siapa yang tahu di hari kita kasih komentar negatif, dia sedang kacau-kacaunya.

Kalau memang gak bisa kasih pelukan, setidaknya kita gak perlu jadi orang yang menjatuhkan.

[writingreadinglurkingandsmirking]

But I Shine So Bright - Rafe Cameron x Reader

Dear Reader Duology: Part 1, Part 2

Summary: You wake up hungover from the previous night’s party, and are struck with the realization of the conversation you’d had with Rafe prior. You decide that, yes, you should actually have that conversation with him sober like he’d suggested. So, that’s what you two do. Word Count: 5.1k+ TWs/CWs: Adult/profane language, she/her pronouns used for reader, brief descriptions of a hangover, OOC Rafe in that he's only a little crazy and is actually willing to admit he was wrong, unrealistically fast relationship re-establishment, Rafe still wants to kill that guy lol, bad example of a healthy relationship but hi this is Rafe be so for real here, Rafe obviously has pretty privilege Note: Yeah so I just decided to do the part 2 lmao so here she is. And now it has me thinking Thoughts about doing more Dear Reader inspired fics for OBX babes...like a Dear Reader duology collection sounds like a fun little project hehehe

Waking up was more painful than you’d anticipated. When you’d gone out, you never intended to get that drunk. Decidedly, you’d drank more than you had in a long while. A stupid choice all around, but especially stupid considering you didn’t have the built-in protection of…him anymore. Your girlfriends had dutifully tried to slow you down, but you didn’t listen to them.

Fuck’s sake, even his friends had tried to stop you. To be fair, they’d been more successful. Yes, the first memory you woke up to was Topper and Kelce, your ex-boyfriend’s best friends, stopping you from doing a fucking keg stand. And that was just something special considering you knew damn well that you’d been wearing a skirt with nothing underneath. So clearly your night had been just full of good choices.

“God,” you groaned, rolling over on your side. Your eyes landed on a water bottle on the side of your bed. You blinked once, twice, a third time, and then lurched up into a sitting position. “Shit.” While the sudden movement made you nauseous for a moment, you managed to resist the urge to vomit. You scrambled for your phone. It was noon already. Fuck. You saw that a group chat with your friends had blown up and you had a slew of other texts.

Where the hell did you go?

Why did Topper come tell us that fucking RAFE took you home??

Hello?? Girl what the hell are you thinking?

You better call us and tell us that you’re safe.

Dude you better not fucking sleep with him I swear to God I am SO serious.

Be like Dua Lipa and remember the new rules bitch.

Be safe I swear to GOD bestie I’ll fuck you up if you get hurt.

If you fuck him you better not let him hit raw.

BYE don’t let him hit AT ALL.

“Shit,” you hissed.

You’d thought you’d had a dream that Rafe had been the one taking care of you. A pleasant dream minus the blubbering you’d been doing. But no. It turns out you actually had been blubbering on him. On the ex who left you for no reason and with no discernible guilt outwardly shown. This just had to be a joke. It had to be. The pit in your stomach wasn’t from the aggressive hangover, it was literally just the dread that had an iron grip on you. Looking down at your phone again, you saw a text from Kelce of all fucking people too.

Lmao I know you’re gonna be hurting this morning but let me or Top know if Rafe did anything stupid yesterday and we’ll beat the shit out of him fr.

You couldn’t help but let out a high-pitched, borderline hysterical laugh at the very idea. You run a hand down your face, grateful that Rafe had forced you to take the makeup off the night before. You felt sick and awful and still somehow better than you had before. It was pathetic somehow, on some level, that spending even an hour with Rafe had the ability to make you feel so much better and so much worse all at once. So, with trembling hands, you made a move to answer.

First, to your friends.

Not yall acting like you don’t have my location. I got home safe. Nothing happened fuck off.

You then immediately silenced the group chat so you wouldn’t have to deal with it. You looked at Kelce’s and cringed, letting your fingers move.

Yeah definitely got a hellish hungover. Thanks for keeping me from doing a keg stand like a dumbass last night btw? Idk what the fuck that was about. And nah, Rafe didn’t do anything. Even if he did you wouldn’t win that fight, Kelce, be so fr lol.

The response from him came quickly.

Ah, she lives. Well, you didn’t choke on your vomit so that’s good. And hurtful, I could definitely beat him.

You rolled your eyes.

Yeah, maybe if he were tied to a chair bro. But fr, thank you for helping me out. Thank Top too for me btw.

The response took longer this time. And was punctuated by an immediate follow-up.

Course. I’ll let him know. You’re still our friend. We weren’t gonna let you get that messed up.

You should talk to your boy though. Let him know you’re good. Pretty sure he’s worried about you.

You bit your lip. Instead of replying, you instead closed that text thread and looked back to the rest of your messages. But, you were thrown for a loop when you saw Rafe’s name appearing at the top, texting you just now. You weren’t proud of it, but you had to throw yourself from your bed and empty your stomach. You blamed the hangover, but you also knew that the anxiety of facing him after the night before was nerve-wracking enough to be the culprit alone.

Once you finally cleaned yourself up, you felt a bit more human again. Only then did you return to your phone. You stared at it for a few minutes before even daring to pick it up. Then, you stared at your background - still a picture of you and Rafe, one where his smile was so big from a laugh that it crinkled the corners of his eyes and you had buried your face in his neck while also laughing. You hated that you hadn’t changed it yet, but every single time you tried to, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You put the phone down again.

Sighing, you reached over and grabbed the water bottle he had left you. Then you noticed he’d also left out some meds for you to take. Not letting yourself think about it or the way it turned your stomach, you took the pills and drank the water completely before letting yourself even think about your phone again. At least that was the lie you spun yourself, ignoring the way that the stupid piece of technology wove through every thought and every damn breath you took.

In an effort to pretend like that wasn’t true, you walked down to your kitchen and got a Liquid I.V. knowing damn well that Rafe would be telling you to if he were here. And, yeah, even now, the little things he did to show he cared still stuck to your bones. You hated it. Or, at least you hated that he wasn’t actually here. Some days it was hard to tell which was true and which was the lie. You wanted him, you didn’t, you wanted him, you didn’t. You definitely did—that was the truth and you knew it.

Steeling yourself, you eventually went back upstairs and picked your phone back up. Clicking Rafe’s name, you were fully prepared to ignore whatever the message was like you knew you should if you were going to get over him. But somehow, you could feel the familiar love and affection punching you in the gut.

Take the pills I left. Drink some liquid iv or whatever if you have it. Don’t forget to eat.

You inhaled shakily, thinking if you should even respond or not, worrying at your lip and tapping your fingers anxiously against your knee. But, as you did, another text came through from him.

Lmk if you need anything.

Short, sweet, and to the point.

You, your brain supplied unhelpfully. I just fucking need you.

You thought about the night before. About the words he said. About the stark honesty in his voice that you hadn’t heard in months from him. You thought about the simple promise he made. He said that you could talk about it when you were sober if you still wanted to. Did you want to? Yes. So, before you could talk yourself out of it, you clicked his contact to call him and brought the phone to your ear.

“You okay?” were the words that Rafe greeted you with. Not hello. Just concern.

“I…yeah. I’m fine,” you said when your brain finally caught up with you again. “I…thanks for getting me home. You know, and everything else too,” You paused for a moment, finishing with, “You really didn’t have to do all that.”

“Of course I did,” Rafe said, sounding surprisingly serious. “I’d never leave you like that. Ever.”

“I’m sorry I was such a mess,” you said, reflexively apologizing. “And sorry I was like…pawing at you like some animal.”

Rafe let out a dry sort of chuckle that betrayed he was at least slightly amused by some of your antics the night prior. It made your heart flutter, which just felt utterly ridiculous. He made a noncommittal noise. “I just wanted to make sure you, you know, were good.”

“No. Seriously, I can’t imagine how much worse that would’ve gotten without you there. So really, uh, thanks. I was…not thinking last night obviously,” you said. There was a pregnant pause over the phone and you realized how that sounded. “I mean I, like, really don’t drink that much!” You were rushing to clarify, anxious to make sure that Rafe knew you didn’t mean your conversation with him. “I seriously don’t even know how much I drank. I’m lucky I didn’t, like, die in my sleep.”

“I’ve seen you worse,” he said flatly. “You’d have been fine.”

“That’s when I had you, though,” you pointed out before you could stop yourself. You heard Rafe inhale sharply, saying your name but you cut him off. “Did you mean what you said?”

Rafe paused. “What?” he asked cautiously.

“That we can actually talk,” you clarified.

“Are you not too hungover for this?” Rafe asked, sounding tired already.

“No,” you said bluntly. “I want to talk to you.” You huffed out a sigh. “Rafe, I need to talk to you.”

You heard him let out a sigh of his own. “Yeah,” he said. “I know.”

“I want to do it in person,” you said, willing to push your luck here. “I don’t want to do this on the phone. I want to see your face so I know if you’re lying to me.”

Rafe gave a similar sort of dry chuckle to before. “Have never lied to you, Princess, but sure. Fine. Today?” he asked shortly.

“Yes,” you agreed. “Today. I think waiting two months was long enough.” Rafe didn’t rise to the bait, which you were partially glad for and partially disappointed by. “How about we meet at the country club at like…six?”

“You want to do this in front of people?” Rafe asked, surprised.

“No. We’ll go down to the beach. Just easier to meet there,” you said vaguely.

The reality was the country club gave you a way to chicken out last minute that the beach didn’t. At the country club, you could hide in a bathroom. On the beach, unless you were planning on drowning yourself or burying yourself in the sand you were stuck with him.

“Okay, Gorgeous,” he said lazily, the nickname slipping easily from his tongue. “Do you want me to pick you up or…”

“I’m good,” you denied. “I’ll get there.”

“See you later then,” he said.

“Okay. See you,” you said, hurriedly hanging up before you said something stupid like I love you or just tell me now why you left me.

You spent the next few hours panicking about what you’d just done, torn between hating yourself for making that choice and being relieved that it was finally happening. You gave all of your friends in your group chat a short version of your plan. You were met with a mixture of approval and disapproval from everyone—mostly born of a desire to make sure that you were alright. They offered to come and do recon so you’d have an easy out, but you denied the need. Then, they offered to come and slash his truck tires, which you declined just like you had the first hundred times they’d offered over the past two months. After that, they settled and just insisted that you text them an update later to let them know what was going on. It was easy enough to agree to.

You make your way to the country club a little bit before six and were shocked to see Rafe already waiting there. He was sitting at the bar, knee bouncing with anxiety, tapping at an empty glass in front of him. His eyes met yours, and just for a moment, you froze in place. Slowly, you drifted over to his side and were pleasantly surprised to see that he appeared entirely sober.

“Hey,” he greeted when you found words hard to formulate.

“Hi, Rafe,” you replied after a few breaths.

He looked you up and down, an undercurrent of amusement passing through his eyes. “I’d ask if you want a drink but I have a feeling that you’d rather swallow a bucket of sand right now,” he said.

You nodded, grimacing. “Pretty much,” you confirmed. You glanced towards the door. “Wanna…go?”

God, how could this be so fucking awkward? you asked yourself. This was the man you fell in love with and knew like the back of your hand and still somehow this was wildly uncomfortable like you didn’t know each other at all.

Rafe nodded slowly, rising to his feet. He gestured for you to go first, eyes habitually roaming around the room. They landed on the guy who had been touching you the night before at the party, gross hand on your leg as if he had any form of claim to you. Rafe felt his blood boiling for a moment and had to resist the urge to go and pummel the guy’s face in. It was hard for him, at least until the guy looked over, noticing Rafe. Immediately, the creep paled to a near-ghostly white shade. Satisfied by the obvious fear, Rafe offered the guy a condescending smile, with a harsh edge to it, teeth set. He put his hand on the small of your back as you walked, guiding you forward and opening the door for you as he went. As he passed through, his eyes did not separate from the guy’s until you had exited. The message was clear, even though you hadn’t even noticed the interaction at all.

She is Rafe Cameron’s, she is not available.

As you started to walk down to the beach, almost immediately, Rafe began to feel guilty for thinking that. He’d already done enough to hurt you in his eyes. But, then again, he couldn’t deny the part of him that desperately did want a second chance to reach that famous happy end. The kind that he knew only you could give him. The kind that only came with you beside him. No, he couldn’t ignore that part of him. It made up most of him. And he knew that it made up most of you too. And that was the part that made him loathe himself all the more.

On and on down the beach the pair of you walked, alternating between a few feet and barely a few inches between you. The silence continued on until you realized you didn’t even know how to approach this conversation. You sighed, stopping in your trek, evidently having decided you were far enough from other people to have this conversation now. 

“I don’t know how to even start this,” you admitted quietly. “I miss you. I meant that. I meant everything I said last night except that I hate you. I don’t. I wish I could, sometimes. But I don’t. I love you. And…and last night you said that you loved me too, still.”

“I do,” he said, shrugging, then setting his jaw to shut himself up.

“Then why are we doing this? When we love each other and we both want to be together? Why?” you asked, the words simple but desperate.

“You’re better off without me,” Rafe said, staring at the horizon, refusing to look at you.

“I’m not,” you denied. “And you’re not better without me either. Don’t think I haven’t noticed that either.” He’d been spending an egregious amount of his time high or wasted since your break up and it was impossible not to notice. Rafe glanced down at you and then back out over the water. The sky above you was morphing from its crystalline blue to the golden hues that promised night was coming soon. “I think we’re past lying to ourselves about that, don’t you? Or at least we should be.”

“I know that I’m not. But you are,” he reiterated. “I’m…an absolute fuck up. And I am only going to drag you down. That is all that I will ever be good for. You may not get that now. But you will.” He sighed and looked over at you. “I’m trying to do the right thing here, Princess.”

“Well look at that, wrong as usual,” you muttered, shaking your head. “You’re not any of that! You’re not a fuck up. You’re not going to drag me down. You are…” You gesticulated wildly, trying to have your brain magically summon the words to describe how you felt. You settled for shaking your head and gesturing around you. “You’re like a…like a fucking beacon or something.”

Rafe snorted. “Fuck me, if you think I’m some sort of guiding light you’ve lost it, Princess,” he said sharply. “I’m literally the opposite of that. I don’t…I don’t help people. I just hurt them.” He gestured towards you. “Look at my family. Look at my friends. Dragged them all down. And…I mean, just look at you. How could you think that I’m anything good anymore?” He shook his head. “No, just…no. I’m not.”

You groaned. “Stop talking about yourself like you’re some hideous monster that has to hide in the dark,” you insisted, voice growing louder. “You’re not. You’re just a man! That’s it! A fucking stupid man, who I love more than anything…who I hate to see tearing himself apart like he does. An absolutely idiotic man who I miss so much it hurts to wake up in the morning.” You deflated, shoulders slumping, and this time you were the one looking out over the water while Rafe stared intently at you. “I’m not better off without you.” From the corner of your eye, you saw Rafe’s hand run over the bottom half of his face while he shook his head. You saw him bring his hand towards his lips and your head whipped over to look at him. “Don’t bite your damn nails, when was the last time you washed your hands? You’ve touched doors and railings! This is a public beach!”

It was like a bubble of tension cracked at that and Rafe laughed. Honest to God laughed. Laughed like you hadn’t heard in months from him. Laughed in a way that made your heart flutter and your lips turn up. The laugh kept going like he couldn’t stop it, and before you knew it you were chuckling yourself, which morphed into a hysterical laugh. You swatted at his arm in the midst of your laugh, but he caught your hand and held it. After a few moments longer, you both stared at each other, calming down. His easy smile and the crinkle of his eyes disappeared, replaced by a frown and concern.

“You…you should really find another guiding light if that’s what you’re looking for. A real beacon. Someone you can count on,” he said.

“Rafe,” you said seriously, taking a step closer to him. “Look at me.” He sighed but met your eyes. You squeezed your still-joined hands and he looked down as if he’d forgotten you were even touching. “You kept me from making myself look like an idiot last night. You got me home when I actively was trying to make it difficult. You held me until I fell asleep. You owed me nothing and you did that. I didn’t even have to ask you to, fuck I didn’t even want you to be there, but you knew what was good for me. And you left out water and pills and then texted me in the morning.” You let out a short, weak laugh. “I don’t think that I can count on someone else more than you.” He looked at you as if to say your name without having to actually speak it and you rolled your eyes. “Tell me something. How often do you get second chances in life?”

Rafe looked away, tongue running over his cheek, and then he looked back. “More than I deserve,” he said shortly.

Again, you rolled your eyes. “Stop being a self-sacrificial bitch for a second,” you said. He looked at you, scandalized and you had to resist the urge to laugh, soldiering on with your point. “Tell me, without the shit, how often you get second chances in life for something that you really want?” 

“I don’t,” Rafe said after a moment.

“And yet here I am. And I know that you still want to be together. And I am trying to give us a second chance. Why are you trying to refuse it?” you demanded.

“Because you actually are a fucking beacon of light,” he snapped, hand flexing like he was about to squeeze yours but stopped himself. “And I don’t want to…to fucking ruin that. I would never forgive myself if I ruined you. If I…made that fucking light go out? No, I’d never forgive myself. And I don’t want to risk you like that. Ever. And considering I’m this fucking black hole of bullshit…that is definitely risking it.”

His words resonated as if they were a tuning fork that struck and vibrated at the exact frequency of your very soul. He sighed and let go of your hand. In your shock, you let him. He moved away a few steps and paced back and forth. This time, when he brought his nails to his lips, you didn’t speak for a moment. You saw the glint of tears in his eyes and you didn’t know if they were from frustration or from sadness—both most likely.

Your brain caught up with you after a few moments of just staring at him. You walked forward and took his hand away from his mouth, moving your hands to rest behind his neck, forcing him to stop moving. Reflexively, his hands landed on your hips, holding you rather firmly to ground himself. You played with the ends of his hair, waiting for him to measure his breath once more and meet your eyes with his own.

“You’re not a black hole, idiot,” you said fondly. “You are not an irredeemable monster. You’re just scared.”

Rafe’s jaw clenched and he looked away, then back again. “I’m not fucking scared. But if I were, Princess? It’d be for good reason,” he said. “I have a lot to lose if I keep fucking up.”

“Everyone does,” you pointed out. You moved one hand to cup his cheek. “For now, if you think that I’m some mythical fucking beacon of light, then let me do it for both of us…be it.” He shook his head, blinking away tears he didn’t want to fall. “Rafe…I can handle you being stupid. I can handle your fuck ups. I have this long. What I can’t handle is losing you.” He was silent and you shrugged. “Look at me and tell me that if I walked away right now and started dating someone else you’d be okay with that.”

His eyes snapped back to you, visibly disturbed and angry. “Fuck no,” he admitted, practically spitting the words out.

“Exactly,” you said softly. His hands moved slowly to wrap around your waist more, no longer just resting on your waist. “I know that there are things we have to work on. Believe me. But we make sense. We work together. Let’s try again, Rafe.” You took a deep, shaky breath. “If you tell me you don’t love me. If you don’t want this…I’ll walk away. I won’t bring this up…won’t bother you again.”

“No,” Rafe said immediately, more firmly than even the last time. “I do love you, of course I fucking do. And yes I want you.” His voice almost immediately became choked up. “I want us. I just…”

“Are the words you’re looking for ‘am scared?’” you suggested.

“No,” he denied, using what was obviously his new favorite word once more. “Not scared. Just…hesitant to risk hurting you.”

You gave him a flat look. “Rafe, is loving me worth the risk of me hurting you?” you asked.

“Yes,” he said. “I don’t care if you hurt me.”

“So then why can I not feel the same way about you?” you demanded. “It’s worth the risk. So let’s take it.”

“You’re more important than me,” he murmured, leaning your foreheads together, initiating the touch he obviously desperately craved.

The noise that escaped you was somewhere between a scoff and a snort. “That’s the dumbest thing you have ever said to me,” you declared. “And you told me that for two years you didn’t believe that dinosaurs were real.”

Rafe laughed, weak but true and a sweet sound to your ears. As he did so, he pulled back just enough that your eyes were able to meet. “I was a child,” he defended, a tiny smile on his lips.

“You were twelve,” you corrected. “You started high school not believing that dinosaurs existed. You had to take an earth science class to realize that fossils were real.”

Turning his head, Rafe moved one of his hands to your face, holding your cheek, just like you were doing to him. “Can I kiss you to stop you from making fun of me again?” he asked softly, eyes darting down to your lips and then back up. “Or is it too soon to tell you to shut up without being an ass?”

You smirked. “Don’t worry. I know you’re an ass,” you said, leaning forward.

He met you halfway, your lips brushing together. The kiss was soft at first, sweet and featherlight as if trying to ascertain if it was really happening. That didn’t last for very long though. Quickly, Rafe’s grip on you tightened and he pulled you closer and deepened the kiss. You happily let him take the lead, letting your hands travel to the back of his neck again, longing to just sink into his embrace. When you broke apart, you both were breathing unevenly, looking at each other with vulnerable gazes.

“I missed you,” you said, voice strangely shy considering who you were talking to and how well you knew him—not to mention the fact that his tongue had been practically down your throat moments earlier.

“I love you,” Rafe said. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to your forehead that lingered, then tipped your chin up to meet his gaze, his other hand keeping you pressed firmly to his body. “You gonna be my girl again, Gorgeous?”

Even though you rolled your eyes, your smile gave you away. “I never really stopped, did I?” you posed.

He hummed, half-frown on his face, and shrugged. “Dunno,” he admitted.

“I didn’t,” you said, wanting to wipe away the insecurity from him in one assurance even though you knew you couldn’t. “I never stopped. And, for the record, I love you too. Even though you’re a jackass.” You paused. “And a little bit on the stupid side.”

Rafe’s lips cracked back into a smile that grew into something far more relaxed. “Well that’s good to know,” he murmured. 

“You just have pretty privilege is all,” you murmured quietly, voice serious despite the words being joking. You looked at him as though you feared he might disappear. 

He stroked your cheek, wiping away a stray tear you hadn’t realized fell, and then reluctantly pulled away from you, forcing his hands into his pockets to keep from touching you. “We have a lot to talk about.”

“We do,” you confirmed. You offered him your hand. “Wanna go get something to eat and actually, you know, do that?”

Immediately, his hand was out of his pocket, and his fingers were laced with yours. “Yeah, Princess, I do,” he agreed. “Let’s go before it gets dark.”

“How could it get dark when I shine so bright as our beacon?” you asked, teasing, grabbing his arm with your free hand and squeezing it in a half-hug.

“Jesus Christ you’re lucky that you’re so damn easy to love,” Rafe said laughing. He pulled you closer, letting go of your hand in favor of throwing his arm over your shoulder. He pressed a kiss to your temple, lips lingering, his voice going serious this time. “I love you.”

“I know you do,” you assured him. “I love you too.” He nodded, still not moving away yet. “Come on, Cameron. Let’s get a move on here. You’ll be thrilled to know that I didn’t listen to you and drink or eat much of anything today, so I am desperately in need of water or something.”

Rafe groaned. “Of course you didn’t,” he said dryly. “Come on, can’t let my girl stay dehydrated or hungry.”

With that, he started pulling you back up the beach towards the country club. And, in the back of your mind, even with the lingering uncertainty and unsaid words, you felt better than you had in what felt like an eternity. You stared at Rafe’s face—your Rafe, your stupid, sweet, annoying, perfect boyfriend—as the golden hour’s light hit him. The angelic glow that it cast on his infuriatingly perfect face was always breathtaking. But, something about him at this moment, after being so vulnerable and honest, struck you differently. You took your phone out and snapped a picture of him before he could notice or refuse and smiled down at it, ignoring the delayed groan when Rafe realized you’d already captured it.

“Come on, Gorgeous,” he complained.

“Sorry, I just had to capture the day Rafe Cameron admitted he was wrong. It’s a historical event,” you said, grinning, sending the picture to your friend before turning the phone off wanting to focus only on him.

He rolled his eyes at the jab, but you were pleased to see the way that his lips twitched up in an amused smile. The sight lightened your heart and made your lips stretch into a wider version of your own smile you’d already been sporting. And in the slowly fading light of day, there were only two things that you were certain of.

Rafe didn’t give himself nearly enough credit.

You weren’t going to make the same mistake as him.

Taglist: @joselyn001 @caughtinthetides @proactivetypaperson @abbybarnesstuff @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @fangirlfree @antagonize-me-motherfucker

[youremyheaven]

butterfly motif 🦋& vedic astrology

ive wanted to exclusively dedicate a post towards the use of the butterfly motif in pop culture, so here it is!! i think butterflies have had a re-emergence in fashion in the last few years and im here for it!!

🦋 as i've mentioned in many other posts, the nakshatras closely tied to using this motif repeatedly are the pisces rashi nakshatras of ubp and revati along with punarvasu nakshatra.

Revati moon, Rihanna wearing butterfly eye lashes.

Venus exalts in Pisces and ive noticed that these natives are often drawn to Venusian aesthetics and imagery.

Rihanna at a Savage x Fenty show. You cannot tell me this isn't reminiscent of the Birth of Venus and the colour scheme is super Venus coded as well.

UBP sun Lady Gaga wearing butterfly face paint. she has often gravitated towards this motif over the years.

here she is in a blue butterfly dress

idk about you but when i see wings, i think butterfly 🦋. hence why this look is here 🤭😌

yet another lady gaga butterfly lewk

2. bella hadid for Swarovski. bella has ketu in ubp and girlie is obsessed with butterflies 😍

3. kendall jenner, ubp moon wearing a butterfly print dress

4. emrata, also ubp moon wearing a butterfly print dress

5. urfi javed, an indian entertainer who has ubp ketu wearing an outfit with a butterfly motif

6. dua lipa, punarvasu moon and known for her butterfly obsession wearing a blumarine butterfly head to toe lewk

7.brie larson ubp asc wearing a winged dress

8. sarah jessica parker is ubp sun & venus with revati mercury atmakaraka and this is a vvv iconic look from sex and the city

9.bella hadid had an nft thingie and the teaser(?) for it depicted her as a cyborg in a pool of water with butterflies. couldn't get more pisces coded than that tbh

10. queen latifah, ubp sun with those butterfly tats. ive noticed a lot of pisces girlies specifically choosing blue butterflies over any other type👀

11. halsey, punarvasu moon and has a butterfly tattoo!!

12. mariah carey, i mean we all know the OG iconic butterfly top moment but here's an underrated lewk from this punarvasu queen who also has an album titled Butterfly

she also has a perfume line called Lollipop Bling that's packaged like this:

13. Kendrick Lamar's to pimp a butterfly

he has mercury and mars in punarvasu. jup in revati atmakaraka and ubp rahu. lamar has implied that the title alludes to the nature of celebrity and how something free spirited and beautiful can be so violently controlled. again, VERY pisces coded.

14. brand new eyes by paramore

hayley williams, who is the lead singer has revati mars amatyakaraka.

15. dolly parton has a very very famous song called love is like a butterfly, she has punarvasu mars conjunct saturn. look at the lyrics of the song, only a cancer girlie would go so soft like this 🥺

Love is like a butterfly

As soft and gentle as a sigh

The multicolored moods of love are like its satin wings

Love makes your heart feel strange inside

It flutters like soft wings in flight

Love is like a butterfly, a rare and gentle thing

Dolly also has a perfume called "Tennessee Sunset" and its packaged like this:

16. alexander mcqueen, the fashion designer had ubp sun and used lots of winged imagery in his work

17. vincent van gogh, revati sun ubp venus and mars and punarvasu rising has a series of paintings called butterflies. i personally associate whimsical art with both pisces rashi and punarvasu. ill make another post some day but the impressionist movement and even the surrealist movement were vvv influenced by these two placements.

18. Papillon 1973

its based on the true story of henri charriere, who is played by steve mcqueen in the movie. not only is the movie called papillon (french for butterfly) the character also has a butterfly chest tattoo and steve mqueen has ubp sun, revati venus atmakaraka and punarvasu rising

19. silence of the lambs<3

one of the most iconic movie posters of all time features a moth. this moth also plays a key role in the movie and is a major motif.

the book on which the movie was based was written by thomas harris, who has a revati stellium (sun, jupiter & ketu)

20. SPOILER ALERT!!

in the movie corpse bride, the titular character dissolves into a bunch of butterflies at the end of the movie

corpse bride is played by helena bonham carter who has ubp saturn and ketu in revati

21. Kali Uchis, punarvasu sun often uses butterfly imagery

This photoshoot was conceptualised and shot by the South Korean photographer Choi Gi Seok who has purvabhadrapada moon (0 degrees pisces)

His work heavily features butterfly imagery ;

XxxxxxX

my own take is that, since pisces is the final rashi and the point of "absolution" it represents the end of chrysalis, when all elements have come together to create transformation; in pisces there is nothing left to do, but seek liberation from these cycles (its purpose is moksha,after all) and dissolve entirely into the cosmic ocean.

a butterfly is a beautiful symbol, representing not only the death of the creature that inhabited the cocoon but also reminding us that that death is necessary because only then can something as beautiful as a butterfly emerge from within that womb. the womb is the source of creation but you're not meant to stay there forever, that's not just stagnancy, that's death. birth is a painful process because you're leaving behind the only place you've ever known but you have no other option so you must be brave enough to face it.

this brings us to the connection of punarvasu nakshatra to butterflies. punarvasu's deity is goddess Aditi who is creation itself; she is the cosmic mother, she created this universe. in pisces, you seek liberation from the cycles of life but in punarvasu, life, the universe, creation itself takes place. thus it represents the butterfly emerging from the cocoon to claim its identity as a butterfly because the life it led before that was a non-life, it wasn't yet a butterfly, it was a non-being. goddess Aditi embodies infinite space and primordial vastness. what better way to represent the cosmic abundance than with a symbol like a butterfly? 🦋you cannot ask who created you because you are your own creation

“Once upon a time, I dreamt I was a butterfly, fluttering hither and thither, to all intents and purposes a butterfly. I was conscious only of my happiness as a butterfly, unaware that I was myself. Soon I awaked, and there I was, veritably myself again. Now I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly, dreaming I am a man.”- Zhuangzi

xxxxxxx

that's it for now but i'll keep updating as i find more examples💛i hope this was interesting<3

[abejaenacuarela]

pipeline weak sarcastic nerd ---> lovcraftian demigod who doesn't know how to human anymore (but is trying)

[timeline de peinados, barba, cicatrices, outfit, poderes y personalidad de Jonathan Sims a lo largo de las temporadas según yo las imagino] 👁️🧿👁️‍🗨️👀💚🩸🥸🛐🥴💀📼🕸️

Just binged TMA in less than two weeks. I'm dizzy and obsessed. I can't believe it took me this long to get into it. Drew this in a trance. Jon they could never make me hate you<3

•do not repost •

odio como quedaron la mayoría de estos Jones. No sé hacer barbas. El color se tradujo re mal de la compu al celu. Enfin

Anyway así es el formato con el que lo subí a Instagram ( y el boceto final):

yes I am implying that the t-shirt daisy dreamt about was a Dua Lipa 2017 tour shirt

[w3w]

Sinclair, Limbus Company ID Pack

req for anon, I've never heard of this media before in my life so I hope it suffices 🫶

Names

adair, alanis, aldous, alfonso, allegra, anx, aster, aureole, balfour, betony, bronte, caelan, cedar, clancy, dacian, deni, elsdon, emil, faithe, fortune, fraser, hartley, jepson, july, kae, kaolin, kestrel, kim, langton, meade, munroe, oswin, peregrine, phemie, raine, reverie, saffron, satchel, selwyn, sequoia, silver, sinclair, sinjin, sparrow, trueman, upton, vere, vogel, windsor

Pronouns

ambi / ambidextrous, anx / anxious, atta / attack, betra / betrayal, co / coin, cont / control, dea / death, deni / denial, dua / duality, em / empathy, fe / fear, grow / growth, hu / humanity, ill / illusion, inn / innocent, in / insecure, lo / loss, lo / lost, pea / peace, qu / quiet, re / rebel, reco / recovery, re / reject, revo / revolt, sin / sinner, spli / split, tea / tear, ti / timid, vio / violent, un / uncertain, un / safe

Titles

sinner 11°, [x] lost to illusion, [x] who gets lost in the moment, stagehand illusionist, [x] who's two sides of the same coin, two worlds intertwined, [x] who brings forth an era of self realization, [x] who seeks meaning, [x] who rejects machinery, [x] who'll grow into [x] role, little bird who'll learn to soar, [x] who lost it all, her hero, [x] who rejected tradition

Genders

angelsfearquoteic, anxenic, feareatian, genderpatched, glasbrisphoria, idenblur, inochuld, lostboy, mortiscruoric, patheccentrean, peacefuldecayic, recovertraumic, sieanquist

[daughterofsekhmet-bast]

Dua Netjeru! Dua Re!

I call to you upon the shortest day.

Re, Lord of the Universe, Self-Created One,

Who crosses the horizon as the shining sun,

Today your light is dim; your journey ‘cross the sky brief.

Darkness bathes the world; in your absence grant us relief.

Protect us from the looming shadows,

As snow shines and candle glows.

May joy and love outshine the gloom,

‘Till the sun emerges from its tomb.

Hail to you, Heavenly Ones, this I pray!

Dua Netjeru! Dua Re!

[bookgeekgrrl]

My media this week (28 Apr - 4 May 2024)

📚 STUFF I READ 📚

😍 Bound by Contract (BootsnBlossoms & Kryptaria) - 135K, 00Q00 - pt 2 of The Marketplace AU with Bond & Q figuring out how their relationship works for them and how Alec fits all while doing semi-canonical spy shit. Such a huge fan of this series.

😍 Out of the Dead Lands (orphan_account) - "Someone is building machines that look and act like people. Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier tries to be Bucky Barnes." - 62K, stucky, very angsty with a happy ending, robots, identity porn (of a sort) - SO GOOD! (thank you, unknown author, for orphaning your work instead of deleting it.)

💖💖 +207K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved 💖💖

February (xoxobuckybarnes) - MCU: stucky, 5K - Steve and Bucky celebrate Valentine's Day in Wakanda

if the bad times are coming let 'em come (suzukiblu) - MCU: shrinkyclinks, 9K - accidental interdimensional swap puts still recovering WS into 1940s with pre-serum Steve

Maybe Our Kind Don't Fit Round Here (Rainne) - MCU: shrunkyclunks, 5K - companion fic to above - 1940s pre-war Bucky with modern Steve

📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺

Um, Actually - s1, e21-32

Royal Pains - s8, e1-8

Ghosts (US) - s3, e10

The Brokenwood Mysteries - s10, e1

D20: Fantasy High: Junior Year - "The Name" (s21, e17)

D20: Adventuring Party - "Five Years in the Making" (s16, e17)

Dead Boy Detectives - s1, e4-8

🎧 PODCASTS 🎧

⭐ Lost Notes - S1 Ep. 1: Louie Louie: The Strange Journey of the Dirtiest Song Never Written

Dinner’s on Me - Niecy Nash-Betts

Under the Influence - Ham on Wry: Sandwich Board Advertising

Under the Influence - Cars Are The Stars: Automobile Brands in Hollywood

⭐ Lost Notes - The True Story of ‘Tainted Love’

Worlds Beyond Number: Fireside - [One Shot] SPACE CRAM: Reasonable Hoop Dreams - "The Menlo County Summer League 3X3"

Pop Culture Happy Hour - Dead Boy Detectives

Homophilia - LOL LOL OMG LOL with Steve Yockey

WikiHole - Virginia (with Lauren Lapkus, Naomi Ekperigin and Mary Holland)

Switched on Pop - Best of 2024 so far: hip hop feuds, Hozier’s pop surprise and espresso shots

Pop Culture Happy Hour - Summer Guide

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Old Cahawba

Wild Card - Jenny Slate turns fear inside out

It's Been a Minute - How Chicago's Black press shaped America

Consider This - Judi Dench reflects on a career built around Shakespeare

Shedunnit - The Murder on the Links

Vibe Check - Every Girl Has A Good Gay

⭐ 99% Invisible #580 - Mr Yuk

Today, Explained - One Flu Over The Cowcow’s Nest

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Checking Into Hotel Imperial with Deborah Cohen

Pop Culture Happy Hour - The Idea Of You

Throughline - The 4th Amendment: Search and Seizure

⭐ If Books Could Kill - "Going Infinite": Michael Lewis Takes On Sam Bankman-Fried

⭐ You Are Good - My Own Private Idaho w. Cecil Baldwin

Dear Prudence - My Brother Is a Budding Alex Jones. Help!

⭐ Endless Thread - Episodes We Love: Doom Jelly

Pop Culture Happy Hour - The Fall Guy And What's Making Us Happy

Re: Dracula - May 3: Your Friend, Dracula

It's Been a Minute - An inside look at the campus protests; plus, Israel at Eurovision

Armchair Expert - Chris Pine

Re: Dracula - May 4: The Eve of St. George's Day

Today, Explained - The tourist tax

Welcome to Night Vale #247 - Rerun

🎶 MUSIC 🎶

The Who

Dua Lipa

Back to the Yacht

Endless R&B Throwbacks

Hozier

[zaurae]

𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐬

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ 𝑯𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒈𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒖𝒑 𝒃𝒂𝒅 𝒉𝒂𝒃𝒊𝒕𝒔 ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

First off, giving up an old bad habit is difficult, that I know; however, it is not impossible. I've had a lot of difficulties in my life where I repeated the same habit over and over again and I thought for me I would never overcome them. But you know what changed? trying. I tried my best every day and even if I failed, I slowly accepted that I am not perfect and I am only human. That is who we are, and that is why Allah the Almighty is so merciful, because Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala himself knows we humans will slip up and fall. But listen, it's not impossible and as annoying as it is, as long as you keep trying, keep having that good intentions of becoming better and to do better; trust me those habits will be history.

Whenever we do something for the sake of our lord, everything works out, everything clicks together. These habits you have won't be vanished for one day of course, or a week, it's a process--a journey that we all need to accept. Think of it as a fitness journey, you won't get fit in one day. These things take time and after feeling so negative about myself I realized as long as you try, asking Allah for help, and doing the most you can--it is possible.

I hope these tips do help you, and everyone is different as everyone has different struggles and bad habits. These will either help you or guide you to overcome those habits in your own way. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala make it easy for us.

⤑ 𝑰𝒎𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑸𝒖𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚 𝑶𝒇 𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝑵𝒂𝒎𝒂𝒛

I have seen a video of someone asking a scholar why do I still commit these bad deeds/habits if I am performing my five daily prayers? and the answer to this was the quality of your namaz. Do you rush into prayer, are you zoning out, are you not on time for namaz, and etc.

There is of course a lot to this but the quality of your namaz and how much time you spend with our lord does affect our hearts.

One of many ways to re-connect with our lord to become better with our daily prayers are:

Performing your prayers on time (I understand how our laziness could get in the way or how we are so into whatever we were doing before and cannot detach ourselves from this but, a quote I read and did help me at times like this was "Put your time and effort to Allah, and Allah will put his time and effort to you too.")

Recite a dua/surah after your namaz (Ayetel kursi, a repentance dua, La ilaha illallah, wahdahu la sharika lahu, lahul-mulku wa lahul hamdu, yuhyi wa yumitu, wa huwa ala kulli shay'in qadir, and etc.)

Perform your wudhu 15-10 minutes earlier (Let me tell you when I did this it was so effective. When you perform wudhu earlier, you are in a clear-minded state and are purified. Along with you being on time for namaz, this additionally helps you become more focused during namaz)

Perform Dhikr (Subhanallah, Alhamdullilah, Astaghfirullah, La illaha illallah, Allahu Akbar)

Learn the meaning of what you are reciting (When you learn and understand the meaning of the surah/dua's you are reciting, being focused becomes easier and the connection becomes stronger)

⤑ 𝑫𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔

Create distractions for yourself to not commit those deeds/habits!

Do what you love and enjoy (Go back to those hobbies you used to enjoy! or hang out with your friends and family.)

Educate yourself (Look up interesting things; Learn something new; Watch an islamic podcast)

Get to work (If you have any outstanding work or homework, get straight to it.)

Learn a new surah (Let's say you REALLY have nothing else to do, then what better way to spend that time in something worthy--learning a surah!)

Go outside and enjoy nature!

⤑ 𝑩𝒖𝒊𝒍𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑮𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝑯𝒂𝒃𝒊𝒕𝒔

Along with giving up those bad habits, create new good habits to incorporate in your day-to-day life!

Each day, add something in your routine--even if its small! For instance, get back to that skin care routine you were so lazy to do; or go on that walk you kept saying later to; or even folding your clothes and organizing your closet. Each time you add a good habit to do, you become distracted to those bad habits, have less time do commit them, and on the long run you are creating habits for a better difference!

With this in mind, please do not do everything at once. To prevent a negative on-going cycle, just like that book "Atomic Habits" said, that "If you can get 1% better each day for one year, you'll end up with 37 times better by the time you're done."

A habit to always include and progress even more is repentance! Recite and repeat Astaghfirullah; Ya Gaffar and Ya Gafoor; as well as the repentance surah's! Before doing anything, always say Bismillah and whether you're doing chores or scrolling on your phone, always say Astaghfirullah. This helps you be more aware of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala!

And lastly, remember you can do it!

: ̗̀➛ Allahumma musarrifal-qulubi, sarrif qulubana 'ala ta'atika

O Allah! Controller of the hearts, direct our hearts to Your obedience.

[zeusraynar]

⚡CAMADA 5: BENÇÃO OU MALDIÇÃO

Você tem uma maldição ou benção? Sim.

Qual deus te deu isso? Hécate.

Essa benção te atrapalha de alguma forma? 5 anos e nenhuma vez atrapalhou. Ele mantém em segredo e hoje, com todo o problema com Hécate e os traidores, é grato por manter escondido.

No caso de benção, que situação ocorreu para você ser presentado com isso?

Se tem um semideus mais preocupado em respeitar a Névoa, seu nome só poderia ser Raynar Hornsby. Cada pecinha usada fora do terreno protegido do acampamento era pensada na forma que seria distorcida e usada ao seu favor? A lança moldava-se num cajado estiloso de inválido, a proteção dos joelhos numa prótese metálica. Como filho de Zeus, cada vantagem era um passo para vitória. Uma chance de vida. E quando suas missões focaram em resgastes (suas preferidas, por sinal, até virou professor!), a mente quebrou e re-moldou em algo mais fluído... Mais consciente da magia que nublava a visão e alterava memória. Foi numa missão particularmente complicada que Raynar se viu dependendo daquela magia. As duas semideuses, uma sendo filha de Hécate, tremendo de medo atrás do corpo avantajado do filho de Zeus. Ele lembrava de tentar acalmá-las, mas os cães infernais circulavam o esconderijo enquanto sirenes de polícia aproximavam-se. Seria preso ou morto, não era incrível? Porém, antes que terminasse de transformar os monstros em poeira dourada, a Névoa condensou e uma silhueta feminina se formou. A partir daquele dia, Raynar Hornsby recebeu a benção de Hécate. Pelo respeito do seu domínio, ganhou a habilidade de manipulação da Névoa. Seria capaz de controlar e manipular o véu que os protegia e escondia, influenciando as memórias e salvaguardando os resquícios divinos de suas ações.