#eldritchbean things

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

I made my own ID card based on this

I made a few variations. I'm really quite happy with how it turned out :3

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

had some stressful dreams last night. woke up feeling SUPER dysphoric. nothing happened at work but i still feel exhausted for some reason.

and now i'm sitting in my room procrastinating taking a shower. it's past midnight. but i don't wanna think about how wrong my body feels and showering makes me all too aware of it.

oh the joys of being alive.

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

Does anyone else have issues with people touching your stuff?

Like. Whenever my dad or younger brother come into my room they like to grab something and fidget with it and it makes me really physically uncomfortable for some reason.

I just. Really hate it when people touch my stuff. Like. Plz don't.

Whenever someone does that I'm all like

internally. But I feel like I can't show my irritation externally and it's really frustrating.

An example is When people ask if they can use/see/hold my phone for a bit, I feel really irritated for no reason. Like, no. Don't touch my stuff.

It's just a really animalistic reaction. like those videos of people trying to grab something from their dog and the dog just growls and bites at them to scare them away.

I'm honestly thinking about making a sign for my door that says something like "DO NOT TOUCH ANYTHING (without asking first)." Because I'm getting really fed up with it all.

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

I'm currently fighting for my life with artblock rn so...

Could you guys send me some asks/comments/etc with an expression/pose & one of my forms (list can be viewed here)? You can send an outfit too if you want. Pictures are proffered, but you can also just write a description.

Also plz share! I wanna get as many suggestions as possible to help me break outta my artblock.

Ok thx bye!

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

Meet the Bean

(I will be updating this post as I discover and draw my forms)

Name: Genna Brooks

Pronouns: She/Her & Shay/Ter

LGBT Status: Genderqueer, PanDemic (panromantic & demiromantic), Asexual (repulsed)

Physical Nonhuman (NOT therian or otherkin)

Eldritch Shapeshifter

No True Form. Always more than meets the eye.

My forms/sonas:

Masterpost 1 | Masterpost 2 | Masterpost 3 | Masterpost 4 | Masterpost 5 | Masterpost 6

Please, don't be afraid to send me asks! I love hearing from you guys, and it's super fun to be able to answer questions and interact with y'all :3

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

I mentioned in a conversation once that I want to start an ethically sourced bone collection. My mom and brother both stopped and stared at me before saying "absolutely not."

I get that my mom doesn't want animal bones in her house. I get that some people would find that strange or creepy.

But I adore bones. I love seeing the inner parts of living things. I love learning how bodies work. I love the silly spooky vibes bones have. Bones are cool. Bones are one of my special interests.

I want to very carefully collect and clean and tenderly care for bones. I want to do it both for myself and to show admiration and respect to the creatures whose bones I collect.

Also, art references :3

My mom and younger brother weren't having it when I explained my reasoning. They didn't think of me negatively. They just think collecting bones is creepy and weird.

So no bone collection for me.

... for now :3

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

I'm at work rn and I have some juice I bought in the fridge and drinking it is making me feel so euphoric.

It's a Cherry Cranberry Juice, and the color is like a reallly deep purply-red and it kinda looks like blood, which is making my vampire self verrry happy.

It's also nice because I've been having trouble eating so drinking juice helps with my appetite and gets me a little more nutrients than the snacks and processed food I've been able to stomach.

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

Being nonhuman and autistic is really rough sometimes. Like, I wanna run around barefoot like a little feral creature, but the feeling of the ground on my bare feet is just auOGH ICK BLEH ANJDWNDJDWHDIW.

It feels so oogy. The worst is hard floors, small rocks/dirt/gravel, and grass (I have allergies so grass just makes me itchy T^T i wanna touch grass so badly but it's not fun for me)

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

Y'all look at what I bought at the dollar store!!!!!!

It's the cutest cat bowl I have ever seen!!!!!!!!! It has little kitties on the sides!!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

I used it to eat my snacks during D&D :3 It made me SO HAPPY (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

shaving your legs not because society says to but because the creature you are (at the moment) doesn't have body hair

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

Had a bit of a rough day today

My dysphoria followed me into my dreams. I really hate it when that happens because dreams are supposed to be my safe space where I can do and be things I can't experience in real life.

I slept all day because my depression and burnout have been really bad lately (and have been keeping me up super late at night), and I didn't want to be awake when that meant having to deal with my body feeling wrong.

It's hard to want to get up when you aren't supposed to have legs that day.

Luckily my family is super cool. I recently came out to those of them that didn't previously know, and while most of them just Don't Get It, they've been super nice and cool about it. So I don't have to hide anymore at home. That really helped.

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

I'm so mad I'm just trying to get in the shower after my exercise and my brain won't let me.

I love the water. I love being clean. I like the splish splash. Water is soooo great.

But.... My dumb species dysphoria keeps getting in the way because Ew My Human Body Feels So Gross Right Now.

Ough...... This is The Worst.

[eldritchbean-shapeshifter]

This year I made a new year's resolution for the first time since childhood.

I decided I want to exercise for at least half an hour, at least 3 days a week.

So far I've been doing really well!!! I've been using the treadmill in my basement.

I didn't really make this resolution for health purposes (though that is still a huge part of it. I am so out of shape lol).

No. My main reason is because.

I WANNA RUN.

I WANNA GO FAST.

I WANT TO ZOOM AROUND LIKE A DOG DOES THE MOMENT THEY ARE LET OFF THE LEASH

I WANNA CAUSE MASS MAYHEM LIKE A CAT AT 3 AM.

I WANT TO NYOOOOOM.

I want to frolic and run and play without feeling like my lungs are going to implode after 5 seconds.

My inner creature desires to be free to run for as long as I like.

So Imma make it happen. :3