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chilope · 3 months
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Ask meme for people in their 30s
What was the first piece of furniture you bought?
What proportion of your meals do you cook?
Foaming hand soap or normal hand soap?
Favorite chore?
Least favorite chore?
Most precious thing one of your pets has destroyed?
Any groceries you've been getting into lately?
What cleaning product do you swear by?
What's your emotional support craft?
Youtube, cable TV, or streaming?
What's something you saved up for and then regretted buying?
How many cups can you see from where you're sitting?
Which filter are you most likely to go "eh, it's probably fine" when you find out you need to change it?
How often do you take baths?
Do you go down each aisle when you grocery shop, or only the ones you know you need stuff from?
Where do you go when you need to get out of the house but it's raining?
What's a movie you saw recently that you liked?
Pro or anti tchotchkes?
What's your go-to tape?
What's in your freezer right now?
Last concert you attended?
Favorite grocery store?
Paper bags, plastic bags, or reusable bags?
Do you get your government mandated 8 hours every night?
Favorite old person activity?
Would you rather sit on the porch drinking sweet tea or sit by the lake drinking beers?
Do you prefer Boardgame Night, Build-Your-Own-Pizza Night, or Movie Night with your friends?
Be honest, do you like all of the pictures of their babies that your friends send you?
Go-to holiday card format?
How many pairs of scissors do you own?
Do you still own your first car?
How do you take your morning coffee/tea?
What's something you collect?
What's your commute like?
Aisle at the grocery store you never bother walking down?
Do you keep a daily journal or agenda?
Do you still listen to the same music you listened to in high school?
What's the last filter you changed?
What little treat do you always get when you run errands?
Grocery list or no grocery list?
What's the oldest thing you own?
What's an unjustifiably expensive appliance that you really want?
Favorite book you've read recently?
Honest feelings on Settlers of Catan?
What's something you wish you had more time for?
What kind of stuff do you keep on the door of your refrigerator?
Lamps or overhead lighting?
If you could build your home from scratch, what outrageous feature would you want to build into it?
Do you bring a bag with you everywhere you go?
Pro or anti throw pillows?
How many blankets do you keep in your living room?
Did your relationship with your parents get better when you stopped living with them?
What's worse, the DMV or the Social Security Office?
Do you decorate your house for holidays? Which ones?
Favorite high-effort meal that you make?
Favorite low-effort meal that you make?
Do you tend to bring an appetizer, entree, dessert, or drinks to a potluck?
What kind of bag do you use for your bag full of bags?
If you died and your ghost was stuck in the outfit you're wearing right now for the rest of time, would you be happy with it?
Do you have an opinion on your local weather reporter?
Do you have a favorite brunch spot?
Where are you on the minimalism-maximalism kinsey scale?
Opinion on Bath and Body Works?
Last time you visited a farmer's market?
Anything you're procrastinating on right now?
Do you get your taxes in as soon as possible, at the last minute, or late?
Do you keep any stuffed animals on your bed?
Are your garbage bags scented or unscented?
What are you looking forward to next week?
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the-golden-comet · 4 months
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Lately on my dash, I have been seeing lots of wonderful mutuals get too hard on their beautiful minds.
Lovelies, your stories and art are beautiful because they are from you, and FOR you. Stats do not determine the quality of a product. Again, some of the BEST stories on the archive I have ever read were around 100 hits, and 0-10 kudos. Some of the BEST ART I’ve seen has 0 notes.
You know how I can tell? Because the authors and artists poured their heart and soul into their craft. As long as it can inspire ONE person, you should be proud. You just radically changed the life and perspective of ONE person. That’s amazing.
Sure, you might think your art or story is “cringe” or “bad”…OR, it can be someone’s comfort piece that they go back to after a long day. You may see your stats and think, “man, nobody enjoys this,” not knowing that maybe, juuuust maybe, you have that ONE person who you’ve inspired, who loves your work, and lurks your socials awaiting for your next project. Your art, your music, YOUR story has the potential to do that, but you have to love what YOU do.
And yes, your love WILL show. Maybe not with stats, or kudos, or notes, or comments. But you may be someone’s favorite without even knowing. As long as your art is out there, it WILL reach somebody. I will try to be that somebody for a lot of you, but there is indeed A LOT of you.
In a world where media is being “consumed” for “content,” remember that ART comes from the heART (sorry not sorry for being cheesy). Artists, Writers, Poets, Musicians, Sculptors, HUMANS: Get your hearts out there for the world to see. The world needs more motivated minds. 💫
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emo-batboy · 11 months
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Things Battinson Totally Did During His First Year of University
Using Unhinged or Odd Things I Also Did as a College Freshman :D
Note: for this list, let’s believe Bruce was living in an (admittedly expensive and swanky) dorm because it is required for first-years, especially those entering at a young age, and Alfred told him he needed to make friends. Also yes I did every single thing on this list. I never claimed to be a role model
Bruce, to his TA: I’m so sorry I’m late to class. I gave blood a few hours ago and almost fainted on the way here, but it won’t happen again.
Signs up for a class called “Age of Dinosaurs” despite it not being required whatsoever and proceeds to work his entire schedule around it
Bruce: Your mental health is super important. If you think you should see the on-campus therapist, go see them. Friend: Fine. I’ll sign up for therapy if you sign up for therapy too. Bruce: Hold on-
Finds a loophole in his housing contract that allows him to get a pet frog, calls him kermit :)
Gets a second frog because Kermit was lonely, names it Constantine after Muppets Most Wanted, then realizes that they’re gay for each other. Wonders if the rainbow-colored rocks he got them triggered anything
Swings dramatically between calling Alfred every single day and ghosting him for weeks, cries when he realizes what he did
“Accidentally” joins the student body council, doesn’t know what he’s doing, gets re-elected anyway
Molds a dragon out of Laffy Taffy instead of doing his work
Bruce: *joins Honors, gets all A’s, takes the max amount of classes, has several minors, overachieves* Also Bruce: I’m a failure.
Breaks into a building after hours to study because NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO SHUT THE FUCK UP AT THE LIBRARY
Bruce: I will not get seasonal depression this year. Bruce: *gets real and seasonal depression that year*
Meticulously schedules his day with a color-coded planner because if he sits down for too long, the thoughts will consume him
Gives a presentation to his rhetoric class on how much he likes Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse (it is 20 minutes long)
Successfully allocates funding from the student body council to pay for free feminine products in the dorms OUT OF SPITE because someone said it couldn't be done. fuck you, Andrew
Bruce: It is not an all-nighter if I go to sleep before my first class. Friend: It is 7:30am, the sun is in the sky, and your first class is at 12:30. Bruce: But I am getting sleep.
Refuses to go anywhere without his backpack because what if he needs three notebooks at once
Loses over 20 pounds because ✨stress✨ and scares the shit out of Alfred when he comes home for Thanksgiving
Argues with his TA over the one (1) question he got wrong on his Dinosaur exam
Bruce, calling Alfred: Hello father figure. How do I do taxes? Do I have to do them myself? Also, I think I’m having a panic attack.
Joins in on a charity arts-and-crafts project that gives kids books with matching activities made by volunteers, proceeds to commandeer the project because “it’s not color-blind friendly” and rewrites the instructions for everyone
Makes a murder wall
Goes to one (1) sports game and proceeds to leave in the first ten minutes because it’s way too loud wtf is wrong with people
Professor, addressing the lecture hall: I dare you to write an essay about these two sentences. Bruce: *writes an essay about six words, gets a 100, never even read the book*
Crawls into the ceiling for some alone time
Ghosts someone after a date because he’s too scared to tell them he didn’t know it was a date in the first place and now he feels bad
Classmate: How tf does he walk across campus that fast? I go in the same direction he does on my bike, and he’s always ahead of me. Bruce: *is gay sprinting to Dinosaur class*
Refuses to let others use his Favorite Pen TM
Constantly gets mistaken for a Grad Student because he is “so wise and mature” (bestie, that’s the autism)
Alfred: *casually mentions he got into a car accident through text* Bruce: *replies with a meme while hyperventilating because he doesn’t know what to do with that information??!*
Wears a suit to one of his finals
Regularly eats non-organic food for the first time in his life, proceeds to learn about several allergies Alfred forgot to mention he has
Writes “What is a Hot Pocket?” in calligraphy and proceeds to laugh his ass off alone in his dorm because he is so exhausted he’s reached the point of delusion
Locks himself out of his dorm right before class, frantically asks the floor group chat if someone can help, proceeds to tell the nice gay man on the floor who saved him “I love you” because his social skills have hit rock bottom
Makes a little music album display next to his desk for his favorite band (Nirvana) His friends call it a shrine, and they are technically correct
Has a blacklist of people he refuses to interact with because Reasons
Counselor: What do you want to do when you graduate? Bruce: *gestures vaguely*
Refuses to take the bus because there are people in there and he doesn’t like those
Loses one of his frogs, how tf did he do that, they’re fully aquatic, oh fuck, this is probably why they got rid of that loophole a year later because unbeknownst to Bruce, he accidentally started a frog revolution in the dorms, btw he SWEARS he did not mean to do that
Has two trash cans in his room: one for the Good Garbage, and one for the Bad Garbage. Only Bruce knows which is which
Bruce: *writes a creative piece about a ship’s final thoughts as it sinks, bringing its passengers down with it* TA: Absolutely lovely, Bruce, but are you okay?
Goes on Night Walks, keeps himself safe by maintaining a level 12 resting bitch face at all times
Earns the nickname “8th floor cryptid” after pacing the halls at 3am when it’s too cold for Night Walks (honestly tho how tf didn’t he get the nickname earlier?)
Bruce: Do you think a depressed person could do this? Bruce: *has a manic episode*
Okay that's all love you BYE
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bucksangel · 6 months
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Honeysuckle
pairing: alpha!steve x alpha!bucky, alpha!steve x artist!omega!reader x alpha!bucky (poly) - omegaverse!au pt. 3
word count: 4k
summary: “Honey,” Bucky sighs wistfully, falling into your embrace while Steve stands behind you with his arms around your waist and helping you not fall over under Bucky’s hulking frame. You don’t mind though, you’d happily die by being crushed under their weight if it meant you could touch them, and have them touch you. Caressing you, kissing you, adoring you the way only they can. And despite your earlier hesitation, you wouldn’t pass up the chance to brighten up your Alphas day for anything. And their grateful kisses and pleased rumbles let you know that you did just that.
or - your Alphas take such good care of you. their mere presence brightens up your day, so when your Alphas have a rough day you take it upon yourself to show them how good of an Omega you can be, that you can provide for them too.
warnings: 18+, mild suggestive thoughts, i apologize to ur dentists bc there’s so much fluff it might give you a toothache, omega is very shy and awkward but steve and bucky are fond and patient, fluff, kissing, tw for steve using 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner, tiny bit of hurt/comfort, bucky needs some lovin’
a/n: this is dedicated to the loml @buckysbarne and @buckysprettybaby who also helped beta <3
milk and honey masterlist | main masterlist | tip jar
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“Babe -“ Bucky sighs, his head hanging low and hands clenched into tight fists. “I’ll be okay.”
Steve huffs, walking up to his boyfriend and wrapping one arm around his Alphas waist, cupping his cheek with his other hand.
“It’s okay, she’ll understand,” Steve whispers softly, leaning forward and placing a delicate kiss on his mate’s forehead before pulling back and guiding Bucky to look up at him. He quickly dips his head to kiss Bucky’s lips.
“What if she doesn’t?” Bucky mumbles, shame and embarrassment flooding his body.
Why can’t he just be normal?
The day started horribly; Bucky woke up at around seven in the morning from a particularly harrowing nightmare. He hasn’t had one of those in a while, so it was very unwelcoming. This one, unlike other nightmares he’s had, was terrifying in a way he’d never felt.
He knows they’re gone, that Hydra and its agents have been obliterated, but that doesn’t mean Bucky doesn’t occasionally get anxious over the ‘what ifs’ of any potential harm Steve could go through should Hydra get him.
This ‘what if’ manifested in the form of you getting captured too. Even if he and Steve haven’t mated with you yet, they both know in their bones that you were crafted by any gods that exist to complete them. And the thought of you and Steve getting taken from him is far worse than anything Hydra could ever do to him.
Steve had to shake him awake, and he hadn’t been able to stop crying long enough to explain what had happened. After ten minutes of shaking and sobbing into his mate’s chest, he was finally able to articulate the horrifying images that now plague his mind, Steve had held him close, and he had kissed his cheeks and forehead and hairline, all while cooing words of affirmation and love.
The day only got worse from there. After the dream, it started with small things; he burned his hand while trying to make coffee - then spilled the coffee all over his favorite shirt. He ran out of his shampoo and had to use Steve’s - and, listen, Bucky is fully convinced that he survived Hydra because the universe wanted them together again, but Steve could definitely use some better shower products. The whole ‘two-in-one’ thing just doesn’t cut it for Bucky.
But then they had to meet up with their teammates for a briefing over a mission that Bucky is really not excited about, and found out the original one-day mission was going to be three days. Three whole days without you? Luckily Steve is coming with him, but then he thought about you being without both of them and started getting anxious. Now, even though you all haven’t been together for long, and they both know you can handle yourself, they detest the idea of leaving you for an extended period.
They’d managed to sneak in a few texts to you. Wishing you a good day at work, sending heart emojis when you send them a picture of a cute dog you saw while walking to the studio - Sam and Natasha spent a long time trying to get the men to understand modern language - and sending you pictures of them while they were too bored to listen to Tony talk.
But then they went to a coffee shop intending to grab their coffee and rush back to their apartment to get a few things so they could pick you up from work and take you to the new ice cream shop that opened up a few blocks from your studio. Dark clouds came rushing overhead while they were waiting for their drinks, and they decided to wait out the storm in a corner booth.
But people were staring, giving them - mainly Bucky - nervous glances, and a few people at the table next to them ate quicker than someone usually would and then placed a wad of cash on the table before rushing out.
Suddenly the idea of getting ice cream doesn’t sound so appealing.
Steve noticed because he’s so attuned to his mate that he knows Bucky is dejected, Bucky is hurt, he’s tired. Tired of people still judging him. Tired of being accused of things that he had no control over. They didn’t stay long, deciding that getting soaked while racing home was better than being in a place that’s now making Bucky feel unsafe.
Bucky’s been fighting with himself ever since they got home and changed out of their wet clothes. He wants to spend time with you more than anything, and you’ve been excited about this date ever since they told you, and Bucky will be damned if he doesn’t give you anything you want. But he really doesn’t think he can handle being in public right now.
His body is hurting with how bad he’s trying to force the negativity out of his mind enough so he can enjoy being with you, but it’s hard. And Steve telling him that you’ll understand that he can’t go out breaks him. His fists clench tighter.
Bucky wants to be normal for you. He wants to go out with his mates and not get worried about getting less-than-friendly looks at the three of you.
“I’m going to call her,” Steve says calmly, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend and pulling him in tight while Bucky’s body starts to shake with how badly he wants to cry. “I’ll call her and I’ll tell her that you’re not feeling well, but we’ll go to her studio tomorrow for lunch. Okay?”
Bucky takes a deep, shaky breath before nodding, trying his hardest to not blame himself when he imagines the look on your face as Steve tells you they have to cancel. Steve kisses his mate's forehead and then untangles himself so he can get his phone.
It doesn’t take long for you to answer, and Bucky can hear your chipper “Hi Stevie!” and suddenly he wants to cry harder. He also hears Steve telling you that Bucky isn’t feeling well and that they’ll come visit you tomorrow. You go quiet for a moment before asking Steve to pass the phone to your other Alpha. And when Bucky mumbles, “Hey, honey,” he knows you can hear that he’s holding back tears.
“Hi, Alpha,” Your sweet voice immediately fills him with warmth, images of your smile filling his head. “You’re not feeling well?”
“No,” Bucky clears his throat, trying to force himself to not feel bad about it. “I’m really sorry, honey. I promise we’ll make it up to you.”
You pause, and suddenly Bucky is worried that you’re mad. But before his mind can spiral into more negative thoughts, your voice - soft and shy - asks if he’s home. And when he tells you that he is, you simply say “good,” and then hang up.
Well, fuck. Bucky tries to convince himself that you’re not upset, but Steve can see that it’s not working well. And at his boyfriend's suggestion of a nap, he trudges upstairs, lying down in bed and wishing upon every star in the universe that you’ll forgive him.
____________
When you heard that Bucky wasn’t feeling well you immediately thought of the worst. Is he sick? Well, that doesn’t make sense, he’s a super soldier after all. Is he hurt? That’s a possibility, their jobs are tough.
Does he… not want to see you? As soon as that thought crosses your mind, you dismiss it. Bucky and Steve have shown over and over that they like you and want to be with you. The word ‘love’ flashes through your mind but you dismiss that as well. It’s too soon, right?
No matter what’s actually going on, you know you need to make him feel better. As soon as you hung up the phone you gathered everything you needed to make apple pies. But then you faltered, what if he doesn’t like apple pie? Well, you have things to make brownies, and you know both Alphas love them. So you took out everything needed to make brownies with the intention of bringing them over when they were done.
But then a thought popped up. Would they even want you in their house? There were a few times when you told them they could come inside your apartment while you finished getting ready for a date night, but they politely declined. You hadn’t thought much of it at the time, but now you’re worried you might be crossing a line.
You’ve just put the mixture in the oven when you decide that you’ll just drop them off and then leave. You don’t want to make them uncomfortable, especially since Bucky isn’t feeling well. While the brownies cook, you run to your bedroom to change into somewhat presentable clothes. You don’t bother getting all dressed up since you’re not going anywhere but your Alphas’ place, and even then you won’t be staying long.
By the time the dessert is done and put into a container, you’ve talked yourself in and out of going several times. Finally, after several minutes of having a mild freak-out, you gather the courage to gather your things and get in your car.
The entire drive has you a little on edge, though you know you have to do it. Not necessarily out of obligation, but because you want to make your Alpha’s happy. They’re always doing little things for you; buying you new plush blankets, getting you food on their way to visit your studio, Steve had even given you a sweater that both he and Bucky regularly wear - fully knowing and hoping you’ll use it for your nest.
Those men make you happier than anyone else ever could, you relish in their praise, your whole body lit up in flames whenever they get all sweet on you - which is all the time, neither man can resist kissing you, hugging you, telling you how you’re the sweetest Omega to ever exist.
They make you happy, and you will do everything you can to make them happy too. You want to be the perfect Omega for them, to show them that you can provide for them too, and that thought is what fuels you to park outside of their house and gather everything.
Your confidence wanes when you get to the front door, anxious again that the Alphas would be upset that you came over. You don’t even get a chance to think about leaving because the door opens wide, and Steve stands there with a smile.
“Honey,” He says, giving you that same longing gaze he always gives you. His eyes travel down to the container you’re holding, his smile growing wider while you cast your eyes down to the floor nervously. “What is that?”
A part of you wants to laugh, you know his heightened sense of smell can already figure it out. You don’t though, you merely shuffle on the porch nervously.
“W-Well I - um… I know Bucky isn’t feeling well, and I wanted to drop off some brownies for you guys.” Your eyes suddenly go wide, a small panicked noise leaving your lips. “Which I just now realized is probably not a good thing for Bucky to eat right now.”
You kind of want to smack your forehead. You were so focused on trying to be helpful that you didn’t even think of what would actually help Bucky feel better. Sensing your growing panic, Steve hums softly, reaching out and taking the dessert from your hands.
“That’s really sweet, honey,” Steve purrs, transferring the container to one hand so he can take your hand in his free one. “Thank you.”
An unexpected squeak leaves your lips, warmth filling your body as you squeeze Steve’s hand and smile up at him shyly.
“Y-You’re welcome, Stevie.” Your voice is soft, nearly indiscernible except for your Alpha with his advanced hearing. “Um, just… I guess you can text me later and tell me how they taste?” It’s phrased as an uncertain question because you don’t want to make him feel like he has to, but you desperately hope he does. You need their praise more than air.
“You’re not staying?”
That question has your head snapping up so you can look at him directly, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you take in his equally confused gaze.
“I - um. I guess I just thought you wouldn’t want me to. I mean, you never want to come in my house, so I just figured you wouldn’t want me in yours.” Your voice comes out shakier than you’d like, and the hope that he’d invite you in is creeping up. “Which is fine! You - you don’t have to, and I don’t want to make you guys uncomfortable, especially since Bucky isn’t feeling well.”
Steve sighs, his scent souring a little as though he’s disappointed, and now you’re anxious over possibly saying something wrong. But when he senses your growing panic, he tugs on your hand until you follow him inside. And immediately, the aroma of both Bucky and Steve’s scent calms you down.
“Of course we want you here, sweet Omega.” Steve smiles at you again, pulling you further into the house until you get to the kitchen not far from the entryway. He drops your hand so he can place the food on the counter. The Alpha quickly moves toward you, wrapping you in his arms and pulling you into his chest. Plush, soft lips land on the top of your head, and they linger there for a few moments.
As though he sensed your arrival, Bucky comes rushing into the kitchen with a wide smile.
“Omega,” He says, walking toward you and Steve with purpose so he can wrap around you too.
“Our sweet girl brought us some brownies since you aren’t feeling well.” You can hear the smile in Steve’s voice, and they both release their hold on you so you can turn around and face Bucky.
Bucky goes silent, and when you place your hands on his chest you can feel how his heart rate picks up. And after a few moments of simply staring into your eyes, his smile softens, his body relaxing.
“Oh, honey,” Bucky sighs wistfully, falling into your embrace while Steve stands behind you with his arms around your waist and helping you not fall over under Bucky’s hulking frame. You don’t mind though, you’d happily die by being crushed under their weight if it meant you could touch them, and have them touch you. Caressing you, kissing you, adoring you the way only they can. And despite your earlier hesitation, you wouldn’t pass up the chance to brighten up your Alphas’ day for anything. And their grateful kisses and pleased rumbles let you know that you did just that.
“Thank you,” Bucky mumbles into your neck as he presses soft and chaste kisses to the area. “You’re perfect.”
You can’t help the nervous chuckle that passes through your lips, nor can you stop yourself from shaking your head, immediately trying to deny it. While you love praise, specifically theirs, you don’t really feel like you deserve it sometimes. How can these two perfect Alpha’s possibly be interested in you? You’re not too sure why they like you, but you try not to think too hard about it. You don’t want to overthink everything and spiral into self-doubt, which would then lead you to sabotage the relationship, and you absolutely don’t want that.
“I-It’s nothing, really. I just want to make you feel better.” Your voice is small and shy, and you cast your eyes downward when Bucky pulls away from you to look at you with such intensity that it makes your entire body go warm. Your heartbeat speeds up when Steve steps back too and moves so he can stand beside Bucky and look at you directly.
“It’s not nothing, baby,” Steve sighs, reaching out and placing a large hand on the back of your neck and turning your head upwards so he can hold your gaze, and it’s absolutely impossible to suppress the shiver that runs down your spine. Oh, how you want to feel his hands on… other parts of your body.
“It’s thoughtful,” Bucky adds, lightly squeezing your hips. “We mean it; thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” You say softly, smiling at both of them and reaching out to place your hands on each Alpha’s chests. In a quick and bold move, you lean up on your toes to place a gentle kiss on Steve’s lips, then move over to Bucky.
Bucky, however, decides a single peck isn’t enough. Steve keeps his hand on the back of your neck and angles your head so it’s easier for Bucky to slide his tongue along your bottom lip and take advantage of your surprised squeak by slipping his tongue into your mouth. He swallows your little gasps and sighs, snaking his arms around your waist to pull your body flush against his.
The intensity of the kiss comes to a halt when Steve’s stomach rumbles. You and Bucky break apart with breathless chuckles, turning to look at Steve’s sheepish expression.
“Sorry,” He laughs, sliding his hand from your neck to the side of your face, and he smiles wider when you nuzzle and kiss his palm. “We haven’t eaten since this morning.”
“I can cook for you!” You say quickly, surprised with yourself by how fast you were to offer. You’re not the best cook, but depending on what food they have you’re pretty sure you whip up something presentable. Plus, your inner Omega is just aching to please them.
“You don’t need to do that, honey,” Bucky says, stepping back but keeping one hand on your back. “We can just order something.”
“Please?” You ask softly, smiling up at him and using the fact that he can never say no to your pout to your advantage. “I want to.”
Both men sigh, fully knowing that they could never deny you anything you want. So, they both nod, stepping aside so you can go to their fridge.
“You can just make something easy, it doesn’t matter to us.” Steve kisses your forehead, then smiles as he turns to look at Bucky while you go about finding something to cook. Pulling him in close, Steve quickly kisses Bucky’s lips and murmurs, “Told ya she’d understand.”
____________
“Told ya she’d understand.”
Steve chuckles when Bucky playfully shoves his elbow into his Alpha’s stomach. And Steve absolutely cannot stop himself from kissing Bucky again. And one more time. He can’t help it though, Bucky was feeling so awful earlier, and seeing his genuine smile and sparkling eyes fills him with happiness.
“Shut up, punk,” Bucky mumbles with a playful roll of his eyes, wiggling out of Steve’s hold so he can go sit at the kitchen island. Steve follows him, muttering “jerk” low under his breath as he sits next to Bucky.
The two men sit side by side, both with love-stricken gazes and twinkling eyes as they watch you flit around the kitchen happily, grabbing things here and there. They aren’t too sure what exactly you’re making, but it starts smelling good in no time. But the underlying scent of happiness coming from all three of you is what really strikes Bucky’s heart.
And in no time at all the food has been finished, and you make sure to pile their plates full of the food.
“I know spaghetti is boring, but I added a few spices so I hope you like it.” Your voice is soft and shy as you present them with their plates, and your rapidly beating heart showcases your nerves. You’re desperately hoping they like it - maybe praise you a bit for taking care of them.
“We’ll love it,” Steve says quickly, getting off the chair and walking up to you with a wide smile. “We’ll love anything you make us, honey.”
The squeak you let out makes both Alphas chuckle, giving you such soft gazes that makes you want to bare your neck to them in submission. With that, Steve and Bucky take their food and guide you to the couch in the living room, being careful as they sit down while Bucky pulls you into his lap.
They take time eating, occasionally feeding you despite your assurances that you already ate before you came over. They don’t care though, because they’ll be damned if they don’t dote on you for making them feel better.
And when the food has been eaten, Bucky gives you a glare when you offer to do dishes. “You’ve worked hard enough, honey,” Bucky tells you, wrapping his arms tighter around you to keep you in place.
It’s at that moment that Bucky realizes that this, the three of you under one roof, on one couch, is what home is for him. With you in his lap and Steve cuddled into his side, he knows that he’s the luckiest guy in the world, how can’t he be? He has his Alpha; the greatest love of his life, and you; the sweetest Omega to ever exist who’s teaching Bucky how to be happy in ways he never thought possible.
He doesn’t even realize he’s crying until you make a slightly distressed sound, your hands coming up to cup his cheek.
“Buck?” Steve coos, bringing up a hand so he can run his finger through his mate’s hair. “What’s wrong?”
Bucky sniffles, shaking his head as he wipes his eyes, then takes hold of one of your hands so he can kiss your knuckles. He smiles, so soft and sweet and innocent, smiling wider when Steve presses a kiss to his cheek.
“It’s stupid,” Bucky says with a quiet huff and shrugs. “I just… Today was shit, like, awful. And I’ve been happy all these years with Steve by my side, but other than right now, the only time I can remember feeling this happy was when I was finally reunited with him.”
Bucky briefly glances over at Steve, giving him that soft and adoring look he always gives him, then looks back at you and holds your gaze.
“You make me happy, Omega.”
Your eyes go wide, a soft gasp escaping your lips. Because, while you don’t know everything about what’s transpired in their lives and relationship, you know that it must be a pretty big deal for him to say this. And it fills you with a feeling dangerously close to love, but you can’t help it. Bucky’s been through the depths of hell and back, and he deserves everything good in the world. And you being able to give him some of that goodness just makes you want to cry.
“You-“ You cut yourself off, clearing your throat to suppress the waver in your voice. “You make me happy too. Both of you.”
“Good, Omega,” Steve purrs, reaching across Bucky to give you a tender kiss.
And when you break away from Steve, you turn to give Bucky a kiss as well, and Bucky? Well, Bucky is pretty sure (re: totally confident) that he loves you. He knows Steve does too, which makes everything easier. Knowing that they’re on the same page about their feelings for you gives him reassurance that maybe this could work out.
He wants to mate with you, he wants to be with you in every way possible. And when you pull away and smile at your Alphas with that sweet and tender way you always do, he thinks that maybe, just maybe, you want that too.
So who can really blame him when Bucky asks, “Will you mate with us?”
From next to him, Steve doesn’t visibly react, though his heartbeat speeding up and the flush creeping up on his face tells Bucky that he wants that too - they’ve also spoken about it in length, so he knows he’s not just speaking for himself.
All the two men can do now is wait for your answer with bated breaths. It comes only a half of a second later.
“Of course.”
m&h masterlist: @the-ginger-fairy-artist / @supernovatardis / @perdidosbucky-yyo / @wckedheart / @kandis-mom / @wandaneedstherapy / @bigcreatorwombatdreamer / @venusfly11 / @buckybarnesmetalarmswife775 / @the-photo-hoe / @matsumama / @fandoms-writings / @thornsnvultures / @sadboiabby / @lily-excal / @alright-i-guesss / @blondie-bluue / @loveforreading / @marvel-wifey-86 / @wheezy-stucky / @exposition-belongs-somewhere / @stuckysbike / @starkblackwolf / @caitlink26 / @dreaming-potato / @lethargicluv / @perfectlyboring / @monicachic13 / @akmenia / @shawnftjacob / @hc-kerr / @iamfandomwasted / @wizardofstories / @emerald-writes / @matchat3a  / @mollygetssherlockcoffee / @normalgirlnextdoor / @lolitsbuckybarnes / @rippedpiece / @biteofcherry
main taglist: @lilyalone / @crazyunsexycool / @goldylions / @yeehawbrothers / @buckyssweetheart
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neiptune · 8 days
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i don't want you like a best friend
cw: 4.2k wc, female reader, soulmate au, friends to lovers, tendo may be the only person in the world without a mark and it's quite hard to convince him that, most times, the universe doesn't know shit
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“Holy shit, this is the best thing I ever tasted”.
“Don’t lie”.
“I’m not!”.
Tendo narrows his eyes, unimpressed.
“You said that about the last five bonbons”.
“Listen, the one with port and cinnamon was great n’all but this is a cookie dough brown butter bonbon. I’m blown away. I want to sleep with this one. I want to buy it dinner and then take it to bed”.
That’s when Satori laughs, loud and boisterous as he still allows himself to be around you. It makes you smile, seeing him happy.
“Tell me the secret to crafting these”.
“Again?”, he snorts, “I already explained the process a million times”.
“Wanna hear it again. I like how you talk about it”.
“Okay, weirdo”, there’s fondness and a silent invitation in the way he pushes the little box of his latest experiments towards you.
It’s soothing, comforting, listening to instructions you’re already familiar with. Tendo goes over how important it is to choose flavors that are fun and still be attentive enough to make sure the chocolate stands on its own: flavoring components should never completely ride over it. He skillfully exercises subtlety when coming up with new combinations, always keeps the interior so creamy and smooth the treat ends up melting in a delicious puddle on one’s tongue. The outer layer should never be too thick, chalky or cakey: that’s why he prefers to form most of the chocolates with his hands instead of using a mold.
There’s creativity involved in what he does but there’s also science. It requires a lot of patience, most of his work is made of tedious steps repeated over and over again within specific time limits and a perfectly calculated temperature. It fits him, you believe: Tendo’s always been diligent and persevering, no matter what the world threw at him.
He puts a lot of work in his boxes too, especially the ones he has to ship. They’re all triple-insulated, double-stuffed and always perfectly packed. A cute, colorful thank you card always goes hand in hand with each purchase, if he receives orders for a birthday or a special gift he’d even write a personal note as an addition. As a foreigner, it hasn't been easy to establish himself as a reliable chocolatier in a city like Paris, but he now has a pretty loyal clientele and the shop is basically never empty.
“That one’s my favorite”, Satori’s eyes zero on the bite-sized bonbon you’ve picked from the box.
You hum, appreciating the way the chocolate melts in your mouth. It’s not as good as the previous one but you recognize the artistry with which the flavors fuse with each other, chocolate ganache with clementine and hazelnuts, just a hint of lemon zest.
“They’re all incredible, ‘Tori. You’re very talented”. Tendo smiles.
“Thank you”, he mutters, grateful, “now, can we talk about it?”.
“There’s nothing to talk about”, you dangle your legs from the counter of the little production kitchen in the back of his boutique shop, closed for the day. It’s incredibly tidy, smells of soap and citrus.
“You impulsively booked a flight across the world because of a guy”.
Ouch.
“I flew across the world to visit my best friend”, you scowl, “thought he’d be happy to see me”.
“I’m fucking ecstatic, ma chérie”, it’s probably the happiest he’s been in years, “but we need to talk about it. Tell me what’s on your mind?”.
He can see the bags under your eyes, the usual brightness missing from your smile, playful vibration to your jokes absent. He knows you’re hurting and while he’d be thrilled to keep you in Paris for as long as you wish, Tendo has to know what’s broken before he even attempts to mend it. His gaze falls on a specific portion of skin of your wrist and a sigh slips past his lips.
“He broke up with me”, you articulate slowly, “said we weren’t compatible. Said it’s safer to abandon the delusional ideas that drew us close to each other and do things how they’re supposed to be done. According to the plan”, there’s a grimace on your face that pairs well with how you spit out the last words.
“Did you show him?”.
“No, you know I don’t do that anymore. He didn’t see mine and I never wanted to see his. He agreed to that”.
“Right”.
“And then, I don’t know, he did what everyone always does. Changed his mind”.
Satori sighs. Truthfully, he’s always been a little sad about your mark being permanently covered with thick foundation, concealer or whatever else. It’s been years. He misses seeing the little crooked triangle on your wrist.
“Well, maybe…”, he starts but is soon interrupted by a loud scoff.
“Don’t”.
“But they’re not wrong. The universe has it all layed out for you, maybe it’s time you stop being so stubborn”.
“I don’t care about the universe, Satori. The universe is not going to take away that choice from me, it should belong to me. I don’t want to be destined to someone, I want to be chosen by them”.
He deflates in the plastic chair he’s sitting on. Can’t really argue with that logic.
Ever since middle school, when your mark first appeared, you never wanted to succumb to the whole the cosmos has already decided who the perfect person for me is bullshit. You simply can’t accept giving up the freedom of falling in love with whoever you wish to pursue, regardless of the universe agreeing or not. That’s why you never really cared about matching marks and all that jazz, always dated those who seemed not to care either. But after a number of failed relationships, it became painfully obvious that deep down, everyone always believes marks are the real deal. It’s why you decided you never wanted to see the mark of the next guys you’d date, and certainly didn’t want to show yours anymore. Sometimes it’s even hard to remember it’s still there, underneath stubborn layers of concealer. You hated it your whole life.
“You’re right. It’s your life, you should live it however you see fit”, they’re idiots for giving up on someone like you in the name of a dumb sign or whatever anyway.
“I thought you’d understand this more than anyone, you’ve always hidden your mark too. I don’t even know what it looks like and it’s okay! It’s yours! Shouldn’t belong to anyone else’s prying eyes”, you pick another chocolate truffle from the special box he’s sorted for you. It’s red velvet flavored.
Tendo insisted on calling his shop like that, rouge velours, deaf to the literal translation not being entirely correct. The french need to associate the word gâteau to it, it has to be a red velvet cake. But he didn’t care, adamant in going with just red velvet.
It was a joke you had blurted out at the end of high school, sitting on the curb outside your favorite konbini on the way home, another summer evening made of snacks shared underneath the street lamps. Satori said he wanted to move to France and learn how to make handmade chocolates, open a shop and everything. You suggested it should’ve been called red velvet, would’ve paired well with his hair. It never crossed your mind that he would take your suggestion seriously.
Frankly, Tendo’s not changed much since high school. He’s a little taller, broader in the shoulders, prefers a buzz cut. He’s still cheerful, less loud if you’re not around, enjoys singing made up tunes to himself while he works, occasionally takes part in volleyball games when neighbors or friends from the gym invite him. More than anything, he’s still the kindest, most generous friend one could have.
You used to be a little jealous of Ushijima, never one to accept easily to be downgraded in the best friends ranking system. As a teenager, it was hard to acknowledge that Satori’s heart is simply big enough to fit everyone he cares about in there. Not many people realized how much of an honor that was anyway, so there was plenty of space.
He still calls Ushijima to check up on him and the fact that they declared to be best friends during a television show didn’t leave a sour taste in your mouth as it would’ve back then. Wakatoshi is a nice guy, it definitely grew on you and it now gives you comfort knowing that Satori gets to throw the blanket of his affection over more than one person’s shoulders.
Not a day goes by without missing him, different time zones making it even more complicated to keep up with each other. Yet, he’s always the one willing to stay up late to talk to you, insists that while you work in the morning, he enjoys crafting chocolates in the middle of the night. That hardly matters, since you know he has to wake up early to open the shop.
“Hard to hide something you don’t have”, he grins from where he’s sitting, in front of you. Your dangling legs come to a halt.
“What?”.
“I don’t have a mark”, Satori shrugs, “not a big deal”.
“That’s impossible”.
“You’ve seen me naked”.
“Because you didn’t lock the damn bathroom door!”, your face heats up at the memory belonging to so many years ago. He snickers.
“Well, if I had a mark you’d know!”.
You pause, incredulous.
“Did you check your nails? Maybe it was in your hair and you shaved it off. Everyone has a mark!”.
“I don’t have it”, he knows, he’s checked every inch of his body for too long before giving up, “don’t act so shocked, it makes perfect sense”.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”.
Satori shrugs, a timid smile on his lips.
“I’m damaged goods. I wouldn’t expect to be the right fit for anyone, the universe decided to spare me and a potential unfortunate match the embarrassment”.
To him, it’s perfectly normal that there’s no one right for him out there. Or rather, that he’s not the right person for anyone. Who would want that, anyway? The guy who’s always been too weird to be looked at normally. The guy who always stands out the wrong way. If the universe has decided to be merciful enough to spare him the disappointment flashing over someone’s face upon discovering that he’s their soulmate, the only thing Tendo should feel is gratitude. 
“Don’t say shit like that ever again, Satori. Damaged goods? What the hell? You’re the best person I know!”, you almost throw the chocolate box at his head, “anyone would be lucky to have you as their soulmate. Anyone. I’m certain you’re the perfect match for a lot of people but I find it very hard to believe they’d deserve you anyway”.
You’re his best friend, you’re supposed to say all that. Yet, kept silent by that fiery glare of yours, Tendo can’t help but feel his chest warm up.
He didn’t necessarily have a crush on you in high school, that’s what he told himself anyway. When you started going out with Eita, part of him was relieved you went for someone normal. His teammate fell into the right category: Semi was attractive, had good grades, knew his way around girls. It was a good reminder of what Tendo wanted for you, of what you deserved. He cared deeply about your happiness and would’ve went to impossible lengths to shield you from all the bad there was in the world. That still hasn’t changed. Your best friend was what he was always destined to be and it was more than what he could’ve asked for, anyway.
And so it wouldn’t have been right to fantasize, to admit to himself that for the first time ever since he was a kid, Tendo wished to be the opposite of what he was. He dreamed of a different childhood, school days filled with friends, practice bursting with laughter instead of whispers, not a reason in the world to direct him curious or grossed out stares. He wished he was handsome, charismatic, funny in a way that made girls laugh in sincere amusement instead of discomfort. He wanted so badly to be everything he was not, for you.
When he admitted to himself that he loved you, deeply, ferociously, in a way that would’ve scared off any other human being, high school was over and so was his volleyball dream. Another fantasy coming to an end. Satori announced he wanted to move to Paris, expecting life, distance, a different time zone, your boyfriends, to make the friendship too heavy of a task to keep up with.
And yet, you stayed by his side. Most importantly, you wanted him to stay by yours. Tendo has never been much used to the feeling of being wanted, his presence wasn’t exactly desired by other people throughout his life. But you and Paris both taught him that maybe he does have something to give, something people can be willing to accept. So what if that something isn’t romantic love? He’s already luckier than he ever imagined he would get. He’s going to be okay, as long as you’re his friend. He’ll manage.
“Satori”, you snap him back to reality, “I mean it. Fuck the universe”.
Honestly, the only thing he’s mad at the universe for is making you so deeply unhappy. Tendo’s not sure he can forgive the cosmos for failing you so many times.
“Yeah”, he agrees lightly, “fuck the universe”.
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Maybe Tendo had a point when he referred to your little vacation as ‘impulsive’, given that you never really travelled outside of Japan before. Yet, what initially was an easy escape from your disappointing reality and a wonderful excuse to finally visit your best friend, soon turned into a delightful adventure.
You reciprocated Satori’s hospitality by being as useful as possible: you’d keep his place tidy and clean, get groceries, cook dinner. He’d insist on ordering out, would try to snatch the vacuum cleaner from your hand, sometimes Tendo would come home later than usual with his hands filled with groceries just so that you didn’t feel like you needed to refill the fridge. But you liked being there and you loved taking care of him, especially since he vehemently refused to go back to sleeping in his bed and offering you the couch instead.
On his rare free days, Satori gladly gives you a tour of the city and his favorite places. When he’s working, you’d explore Paris on your own, the little map he drew by hand safely nestled in your pocket. Yes, you obviously have a phone, but the map makes each stroll all the more special.
Being with him and feeling genuinely appreciated, in a city so wonderful and far away from home, made you realize that perhaps the universe got it all wrong. Maybe there’s no one out there with a mark similar to yours. Maybe you’re not a match for romantic love in the first place. You’re already lucky enough as it is, with a friend so wonderful you can share lovely dinners with over episodes of silly tv shows, in a tiny apartment filled with affection and laughter. It’s the best you’ve felt in years and the idea of leaving has never felt as dreadful.
But everyone has to get back to their life eventually: there’s your job, bills, rent, you haven’t visited your parents in a while. All these things you’re having a real hard time caring about as Tendo offers another glass of wine, the bottle you’re sharing practically empty resting by his feet.
It’s your last night in Paris and he insisted on cooking for once, a full course dinner paired with an expensive Clos de la Roche. Notes of woods and cherries dance on your tongue when you take another sip and you shut your eyes for a moment, savoring the taste. How did you end up on his bedroom’s floor anyway? Was it him who suggested sitting on the carpet with your backs pressed against his bed? No, you’re almost certain it was you. Satori tries to be less weird as a grown up, by his own admission: he leaves odd suggestions and ideas to other people, too busy trying to fit in now.
You find yourself observing his profile as he torpidly blinks, his own gaze focused on the hands holding his glass. The line of his jaw, the perfect curve of his nose. You think he’s pretty, spiky hair no longer there to tear away one’s attention from his features.
“Did you date a lot, here?”, you ask, genuinely curious. He turns to look at you, amused.
“A lot? When did I ever date a lot?”, Tendo chuckles to himself but you recognize the hurt simmering underneath the humor. It hurts you, too.
“Well, did you date?”, your impatience feels surprising but there’s no time to dwell upon unfamiliar feelings, not as Satori hums with a lethargic nod.
“Yeah, a few times”.
“They didn’t ask about your mark?”.
Tendo’s lips twitch as he remembers how ecstatic the women he went out with were upon finding out that not only his mark didn’t match theirs, he didn’t even have one to begin with. He was the safest option they could ever date, no risk of forever.
“It’s easier to date someone you know you’re not gonna end up with”, he shrugs, “they felt more comfortable, it was fun and momentary, thus risk-free”.
You click your tongue in disapproval and Tendo cocks his head, confused by your scowl.
“They, they, they. I always hated this about you, you’re always focusing on what other people think. I want to know, how did you feel?”.
Maybe it’s the wine or maybe it’s the fact that you’re about to become a fugitive presence in his life once more, but for once Satori feels like huffing out his frustration.
“Like shit”, he admits with a sly smile, “I could fall for just about anyone and I’ll always know they’re not my person. I won’t ever have a person and it makes me feel like shit”.
You’re not sure why tears are suddenly pricking the corners of your eyes. Maybe it’s because it’s really hard to remember the last time Satori allowed himself to be vulnerable around you. It always felt like he talked more to Wakatoshi, man to man or whatever. You never felt like you could be fully there for him and now it’s almost too late again, only a few hours before you fly off to the other side of the world.
“I hate them”, you murmur, “it’s just cruel. You’re not supposed to be anyone’s temporary fixing”.
“I’m not ever going to be anything but that”.
“No, Satori-”, in the process of positioning yourself better in order to face him, you kick the not entirely empty glass previously resting by your leg. It’s gonna leave a stain but you’ll find a way to take care of it before you leave, this is more urgent. This requires you taking your friend’s face into your hands, to bring it closer to your determined gaze. “That’s not true. The universe doesn’t know shit, okay? I know you. You don’t need a fucking mark. In fact, you know what? I’m happy you don’t have one. Thank god. I-”, he gently puts his hands over yours and leans over to tenderly kiss your forehead. Your train of thought derails as he fixes you with an amused, fond stare.
“It’s okay. Really”, Tendo lowers your hands and then leaves them cold, head falling to the side, cheek pressed to the orange duvet cover of his bed. You’re pouting, looking more beautiful than ever underneath the dim lights of his room, and so he can’t hold his tongue.
“You know, I find it incredible that you haven’t been able to find your person yet, universe or not. How’s it possible that someone as wonderful as you is being dumped by complete idiots just because they believe in some stupid pre-decided romantic assignation?”.
You mirror his position and rest your head on the softness of his bed. Despite being still on the floor, it almost feels as if you’re lying next to each other.
“They don’t believe I’m wonderful. I guess I’m just momentary, too”.
He scoffs. Deep down, Tendo also believes everyone should be granted the freedom to pursue their desired relationship, especially you. Don’t they know how lucky they are? You ignore destiny to give those dumbasses a chance and they leave before they even get to realize what they’re missing out upon.
“I think marks are bullshit”, Satori gently takes your hand and traces your fingers with his own slowly, eyes still boring into yours, “in a world with no marks, they’d be on their knees thanking their lucky star you showed interest in them at all”.
You hum, a soft smile tugging at your lips.
Before Tendo interrupted your little motivational speech, you were about to tell him why it makes you happy that he doesn’t have a mark after all. Looking at him now, it’s all the more clear. It’s horrible and selfish and childish but, this way, you will never have to go through it: you’ll never have to find out that the one person who’s always been by your side, the one person who knows you better than you know yourself and still manages to love you, also isn’t the one.
Tendo is the greatest person you know, the only one you’d trust with your life. His heart is your favorite part of him: always stayed big enough to fit in all those who asked for access, kindness embedded so deep within him he never let the world’s cruelty affect it. Satori never stored an ounce of that nastiness people loved oh so much throwing at him, it let it become an armor instead. Steel made of insults, cruel jokes, mockery. It breaks your heart that he still wears it. It would break your heart to discover that someone like him isn’t destined to be yours after all, that the universe wouldn’t be benevolent enough to assign the best friend you ever had as your soulmate.
“You don’t mean that”.
You blink, slowly, actually fighting to keep your eyes open.
“What?”.
“What you just said. You’re drunk”, he chuckles quietly and, horrifyingly, you realize your mouth decided to voice those thoughts out loud.
The shock lasts a few seconds. Tendo is no longer fiddling with your fingers but your hand is still in his and the more you look into those crimson irises, the less uncomfortable you feel about what you just said. Is it the wine or is it just right?
“You think I wouldn’t be happy if the universe assigned you as my soulmate?”.
“I think you wouldn’t hate it”, Tendo softly ponders, “but that’d be far from ideal”.
“Hey, you don’t get to decide that. Me and the universe would be agreeing for once”.
Satori swears his heart skips a bit. All those years, all that badly harbored hope, the entirety of his restraint crumbling pathetically after a few drops of expensive wine. You don’t mean that, you can’t mean that.
“You could look at me like that?”, the question is supposed to underline how ridiculous the idea is, but he realizes he just sounds wishful.
“I know you think it’d be hard but it really isn’t”, you laugh softly. You’re looking at him like that right now. As you abstendmindedly play with his fingers, thumb gently rubbing circles on the skin of his wrist, you appreciate the pink dusting his cheeks, the slightly furrowed brows, the sweetness of his questioning gaze.
Tendo exhales slowly. Neither of you is resting their head on his bed anymore, too captivated by each other. “I’m not sure I’d survive the discovery of you of all people, not being the one I’d be destined to stand with for the rest of my life. Because what a waste would be, for that person to be someone else”, it’s nothing but a whisper, raw honesty doing something funny to his stomach as it slips past his lips for the first time. There’s no one but you, honestly. He knows there’ll never be anyone else. The universe has planned love for those around him and an eternal curse for his heart.
“A terrible waste”, you agree and the hand not busy interlacing your fingers with his, suddenly closes around the soft fabric of his hoodie to bring him closer. Satori doesn’t dare move, let alone breathe, effectively paralyzed by the idea of indulging something you’ll regret the second it happens.
Except you don’t. When you kiss him, tentative at first, all the pieces fall right into place. Your lips curl into a small, knowing smile as the world slows down. Then finally, finally, he kisses you back. It’s deeper, a hand pressing to your cheek, it’s corrodingly tender and you feel yourself melting into his touch, into the genuine reverence he holds for you.
Tendo feels something unravel from within, the tangles and knots of hurt, uncertainty, combust and disappear into thin ashes. He’s too lost in the moment, too drunk on how close you’re holding him as your tongue brushes against his own, to pay any attention to the itchy feeling over the skin of his wrist. Right where your thumb is pressing, a crooked triangle appears at last.
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tswift · 8 months
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I'm honestly so tired of reading takes on how "Midnights" is undeserving of awards and not a good album. It's actually a very impressive concept album that is moody, playful and nostalgic. If you look back at the 20 (now 22) tracks on it, it very much reflects Taylor's thesis statement. It ponders adolescence, insecurities and fears, lost loves, adventure and revenge.
These are things that keep most of us up at night, whether it's hyping yourself up (Bejeweled), tearing yourself down (Anti-Hero), reflecting on how far you've come and what you've learned in the process (You're on Your Own, Kid), grappling with grief and trauma (Bigger Than the Whole Sky, Would've Could've Should've), reveling in your enemy's demise (Karma, Vigilante Shit), thinking about lost love (Maroon, Hits Different, Midnight Rain) or simply trying to delude and reassure yourself of something (Lavender Haze, Labyrinth).
The fact of the matter is, Karma, a song that many have mocked over its "cringe and immature" lyrics, is an impressively written and constructed pop song. Being a good lyricist doesn't always mean "ohhhhh this is poetry, this is angsty." What's impressive is someone who can do both.
"Midnights" truly does it all. There's depth, there's poetry, there's tongue-and-cheek whimsy. But it's a pop album. A pop album can't possibly have the same amount of depth, right?
What makes "Midnights" so different from her past pop efforts is that you can really see the growth in it. You can hear what she learned from making folklore and evermore not only in the production, but also in the lyrics. The lyrics are sharper, rawer and more honest. That is not to say Taylor did not achieve this in her past pop albums, she's simply honed her craft. And that's what you should want an artist to do.
It does not have to be your favorite album. Maybe you just don't vibe with it. But that doesn't mean it isn't impressive. You don't have to belittle something simply because you don't like it as much.
I don't think "Midnights" will win AOTY. But I do think it deserves to be in the category, especially in a year that is not particularly competitive. I can't wait for Swifties to start appreciating it. I give it a year or two, then y'all will change your tune.
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honeytonedhottie · 2 months
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master list⋆.ೃ࿔*:・🎀🍰
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growing ur femininity
building ur dream life
confidence
goal ideas
for funsies
how to be a dessert
summer activities without screens
hot girl summer reminders
hot girl summer
honey's diary season ep 1
honey's diary session ep 2
honey's diary session ep 3
all about role models
girly morning and evening rituals
hyper femininity
your guide to casual glam
hyper girliness
some of my favorite shows and films
things to add onto ur morning routine
follow along morning routine
my girly arts and crafts era
honey's guide to fall
the it girls magazine
august catalogue
july catalogue
june catalogue
may catalogue
april catalogue
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thatsexcpisces · 10 months
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Gifts to get the moon signs for Christmas 🎄🤍
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°❆⛄⋆.ೃ࿔🦌*:・❄️ °❆⛄⋆.ೃ࿔🦌*:・❄️ °❆⛄⋆.ೃ࿔🦌*:・❄️
Aries moon: clothing and items for the gym and working out, bold accessories that make them stand out, hats, earrings, tickets or a class for their favorite activity or take them on any fun adventure, new car (if you wanna go big), fancy mirrors, watch, strong fragrance, trendy gadgets
Taurus moon: jewelry, luxuriously-presented items, something cozy and for the home, a spa day voucher, soft blanket, cute slippers, beauty products, skin and self care items
Gemini moon: cute journals to write down their thoughts, entertaining card/games (ex. cards against humanity), stationary, technology, thought-provoking gifts, their favorite book collections.
Cancer moon: cooking set, something sentimental and hand-made (ex. a scrapbook of all your memories together), a comfy robe to lounge in, recipe book, candles and stuff for the home
Leo moon: gifts related to their interests whether musical or hobbies in general. ex., if they love lana del rey get them a vinyl collection of her music or a poster of her. designer clothing, something extravagant and unique, tickets to their favorite musical or show.
Virgo moon: organized home planners, plants, cookbook, antiques, cleaning gadgets, home fragrances, books on getting organized and lifestyle advice, gift cards for home goods stores or their fav stores in general, maybe even get them a small pet to keep company!
Libra moon: designer handbags, books on fashion, good-quality perfumes, beauty items, fancy soaps, silk scarves or pajama sets, luxury brand shoes, fancy decorations for their living space
Scorpio moons: spiritual gifts, something personal from you, leather/ dark colored clothing, pampering gifts, marble items, brand sunglasses, ruled by Pluto; get them an elegant version of whatever they generally like; if they like gold jewelry, get them a carefully-selected box of fancy gold rings or something like that.
Sagittarius moons: gifts brought from a foreign country, something unique, plane tickets to a country they’ve always wanted to go to, travel picture book to record their journeys, good- quality camera, laptop, money, practical gifts
Capricorn moons: expensive things (I mean it’s a Capricorn moon here 💀), money in an envelope, gift cards to high-end stores, good chocolates, wine, and other specialty gourmet items, functional coffee machine, items to relieve stress (back-massager tool, etc), self-help books
Aquarius moons: technology, new phone, computer, Apple headphones, vintage record player, art materials, something no one else has, something related to their humanitarian or quirky interests, trivia games
Pisces moon: dream journal, thoughtful gifts, paintings, adult coloring books or stuff for arts and crafts, cute headphones, their favorite album and CD’s, something that encourages creativity, collection of bath salts and fragrances, meditation/yoga tools, locket necklace, fluffy blankets and pillows
Thank you for reading hope y’all have a good holiday! 🫶🎁🌟
°❆⛄⋆.ೃ࿔🦌*:・❄️ °❆⛄⋆.ೃ࿔🦌*:・❄️ °❆⛄⋆.ೃ࿔🦌
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11cupids-tarot11 · 3 months
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A Letter From Your Future Spouse
➽───────────────❥
1 -> 4
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Cupid's Services Cupid's Master List Socials
Tips appreciated!
C@sh app and P@ypal only!
$minnieplant3
@janellec03
LOVE U
- Cupid 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡ꗃ⋆࣪.
︻デ═一 ✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩
Pile 1- Four of Wands, The Fool, Page of Swords, Nine of Cups, Page of Wands, The Wheel of Fortune.
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"Hi you! I've been sleeping a lot, can't seem to do anything else lately because of how tired I've been. Finally. I can sleep as much as I want to now because of a situation that just so happened to end recently. Death.
What now? See, I've been wondering the same thing. But let's not even worry about it, let's just sleep as much as we want to because we finally can, even if it's only a little nap time out of your day do it because I gotta see you one last time later, I've got a message for you in your dreams. Spirit will tell you, don't worry about missing it or when <3
Resting so much so when I do have to work, you know, find that balance again between work and fun, I can focus on what's so important to me a lot better, I mean really give it my all... You know? Lol
Sorry, I dream a lot, you might notice my head is always in the clouds. I have very air energy like a Gemini.
Things are finally clearing up for me! I feel at peace, maybe we mirror each other and things are also getting better for you too? You have to let me know, okay? I feel like I can finally breathe again, be optimistic without being scared the rug is going to get snatched from underneath.
I've been working so so hard on my craft, putting in so much love and effort into my work and I feel really hopeful that all of my productivity will pay off soon, consistency is key, right?
I really like the color yellow, 😄 talk again soon!"
Hope you enjoyed! Don't forget to do the poll below 👇🏾 ✨
✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩
Pile 2- Knight of Wands, I forgot to write down the rest of the cards I'm so sorry 😞
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"I have no problem with putting in hard work for anything I want, even you, you know? If you don't want me the moment we catch eyes I'll make you ;)
The moment I catch you I'm going to make sure I never stop loving you, I'll make sure every day is beautiful, even on our bad days we'll kiss each other good night before bed still. I love you!
Why do you keep worrying yourself? All of that doubt in that pretty little head of yours isn't good, you should lay it all to rest before you make yourself sick baby. Sleep more, practice some self care before you run yourself crazy, okay?
I'm so proud of you, you know, for whatever amazing things you've accomplished lately. I believe in you, I'll always be your #1 cheerleader!
You should go out and celebrate! Enjoy the sun, you deserve it my angel! Promise me you won't let this go by like it's just not that big and you'll go out and do something? Pinky promise?
Stay focused! You're on the right path, you're doing amazing! I promise you, all of this will be worth it, it's worth our future 💓 keep going, I know you can do it! 🎉"
Hope you enjoy!!☺️ Don't forget to do the poll below!!
✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩
Pile 3- Queen of Cups, Justice, Four of Cups, The Moon, Three of Swords, The Star.
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" Hi my love, you know I don't talk a lot haha, so I'll make this quick as usual and get out of your hair so you can go on.
I just want to remind you, you're my queen, my favorite, my whole world ❤️ I think red looks really pretty on you btw but anyway, I love and miss you like crazy at times like these.
I am going through something right now, a legal situation, a situation I wish would come to an end right now because it's so heavy on me, it's hurting me but I know at the same time it's happening to me because it's part of my karma, something that's forcing me to look so closely at myself, at every shadow because I think it leads me to you. My everything. We're going to get married, I'm so sure of it.
I'm keeping hope alive, I'm hanging on to every thread of it I've got. I'm working on everything right now, I'll catch up with you soon sweetheart 💋 I'm going to kiss you when I do, you won't be able to get rid of me. ;) "
Hope you enjoy! Don't forget to do the poll below!!
✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩
Pile 4- Ace of Cups, The Hanged Man, King of Wands, Nine of Cups, Knight of Cups, Nine of Wands.
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"I want to come to you with amazing news but I can't, I'm sorry to say, I've taken a turn for the worst right now. Don't worry, it's temporary.
I am slowly building myself back up, that's what I'm doing right now if you're wondering what I've been doing all this time. I'm healing day by day and I hope you are too sweetheart. I might be a bit stuck and tangled up right now, but I'm clearing through it!
I'm the kind of guy who will pursue you with nothing but kindness until I make you fall for me with your charm, I'm cute, I know I am, you'll love me, I have curly light hair, and a really cute smile. You'll think I'm so adorable.
I want to offer my heart to you, fully, 100%. You have me, all of me as long as you give me you in return, I hope you do, I can't be without you once I know you.
Take care my love ❤️."
Hope you enjoyed ❤️ Don't forget to do the poll below!!
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esmedelacroix · 8 months
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Miguel As A "Boy Dad" !
boydad!miguel o'hara who isn't afraid to shower his son with love ♥︎
Miguel And Your Baby Bump ! ← previous part ♥︎
‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️
boydad!miguel o'hara who would come home from work late to find his baby boy surprising him by walking up to him for the first time. He felt a little sting in his heart because he couldn’t be there to watch his first steps but seeing Gabriel smiling ear to ear and greeting him made him feel much better. “Come here my love,” Miguel would say he crouched down with his arms spread out he would scoop up Gabriel, and smother him in kisses.
boydad!miguel o'hara who will always be the one to get up whenever Gabriel has a nightmare. “Daddy?… I had a bad dream,” you hear your son’s quiet teary voice call out with your door cracked open a smidge letting in the light from the hallway. Miguel slowly gets up as you sit up as well. “Go back to sleep Cariño[honey] I got it,” Miguel would whisper softly giving your head a soft pat.
boydad!miguel o'hara who would hold his little boy’s hand while walking him back to his room. The next morning you would wake up seeing that Miguel hadn’t come back to your room. You would peep into Gabriel’s room to see him and Miguel cuddled up on his Lightning McQueen bed. Miguel's body being far too big for the bed making you laugh to yourself hearing his soft snores.
boydad!miguel o'hara who would always take note of the things that Gabriel liked. Gabriel liked Hot Wheels? Miguel would come with a whole race track. Gabriel liked Star Wars? He would plan a family costume for Halloween. Gabriel liked Legos? Miguel would randomly come home with a Lego Death Star for them to build.
boydad!miguel o'hara who was always so protective of Gabriel when the two of you found out he was allergic to peanuts. He always checked everything before he ate them. The two of you also wiped all peanut products out of the house. Miguel always has his Epi pen wherever they go.
boydad!miguel o'hara who helped Gabriel make his first crush a Valentine. He went out late at night and got candy and arts and crafts supplies so they could make a handmade card for his crush. “What if she doesn’t like me back?" Gabriel asked worriedly. "How could she not like you back? You’re a nice boy and you look just like your mother, which makes you the most handsome boy in the world because your mom is the most beautiful in the world, he explained giving Gabriel a pat on the back as he left for school.
boydad!miguel o'hara who always went to his son's events and supported him whether it be his baseball games or the musicals that he was in. Miguel took time to practice with him in your front yard and took you Gabriel to see your favorite productions on Broadway. Miguel was convinced Gabriel would be a famous musical theater actor.
boydad!miguel o'hara who would document Gabriel's life from his first "Dada" to his first baseball game, all the way to his first musical, the time he came out to his family, and his wedding where he married his awesome husband.
boydad!miguel o'hara who went all out every Pride Month all throughout Gabriel's high school career after he came out to the family. Nothing made Miguel happier than the fact that Gabriel felt comfortable coming out to the two of you as his parents. He felt the most accomplished as a father knowing that his son felt like he could tell him anything.
boydad!miguel o'hara who loves his son unconditionally.
‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️
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bloodwrittenletters · 1 month
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LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!
pairing . . . jason grace x fem!reader
the cassette playing . . . so american! olivia rodrigo
the letter reads . . . some headcanons about you and your cute boyfriend: jason grace!
warnings . . . none!
a/n . . . i literally can't write anything to save my life these few days, so jason grace headcanons! this beautiful blonde boy deserves more love.
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✴ he's the type of guy who would ask "can i be your boyfriend?"
✴ even before you started dating, he would go OUT OF HIS WAY (and everyone else's) to give you what you wanted.
✴ learns an specific type of hair routine to help you.
⤷ would ask piper, hazel, or annabeth for hair care products or how to take care of your hair type.
✴ the moment you guys start dating, all of his closet is yours.
⤷ you eventually start to feel bad and tell him he can also wear your clothes if he wants, a week later you find him wearing your pink top.
⤷ "i got stuck, but i look way too hot in this... can you help me take this off?"
✴ everything he makes in arts and crafts, he shows it to you.
⤷ half of the time, it's jewelry for you. the other half is for percy and leo.
✴ if you ever get in a discussion with one of his bros, he looks like a sad puppy for having to pick a side. but he always picks yours.
✴ whenever he goes to new rome alone, he comes back with millions of gift for you.
⤷ that either made him think of you, or thought it would be something you like.
✴ has shared a playlist with you.
⤷ before he asked you out, he made three playlists. "songs that would be ours if we were dating. / songs that remind me of her. / songs about one-sided pinning."
✴ he was surprised when he found out you also had a crush on him.
✴ supports everything you do. (sports, hobbies, etc etc)
✴ this man will 100% have a shoe box of things you gifted him, going from a chocolate wrap to comfort him when he first came to chb to glasses with little lighting bolts.
✴ if someone hits on him / ask him out (didn't know / didn't care he has a girlfriend) jason has two options:
⤷ "no, thanks. although my girlfriend would love to be your friend, have you met her yet?"
⤷ "no. i'm deeply in love with my girlfriend, have you seen how pretty she is? i bought her this bookmark yesterday."
✴ never really liked valentines day or any other holiday since it wasn't celebrated in camp jupiter, but goes all out with you in each one.
⤷ dress up with you for halloween if it's something you want to do, fills every room with hearts and flowers and takes you out in special dates for valentines day, plans your chritsmas gifts months ahead.
✴ if you have herritage ( or are ) from a different culture, he would learn everything and more.
⤷ makes sure that he respects it and honors it. learning your home language, learning your favorite foods, learning your history etc etc.
✴ he burns an extra piece of food for your godly parent.
✴ helps you with homework / does it with you.
✴ loves doing double dating.
⤷ your favorite one has been hazel and frank. his favorite one has been percy and annabeth.
⤷ if the second one happens, you and annie feel like the third wheel of their bromance.
✴ he doesn't have a good relationship with his dad, and... his mom is dead, so he introduces you to thalia, apollo, and maybe hera. also with all of your other friends.
⤷ "guys, this is yn."
⤷ "are you forgetting that i've known half of them longer than you have? did your amnesia came back?
⤷ "the voices in your head are getting louder, my love."
✴ that man LOVES pet names. specifically the original ones he comes up with for you.
✴ he loves to gossip with you.
✴ he is SO FUNNY. we have to stop pretending he's not.
✴ for your anniversary he would probably make you a memory book of your whole relationship.
✴ "i love you, good night, dear."
⤷ "are you staying with me? isn't that against the rules?"
⤷ "screw the rules. good night, my love."
✴ you're one of the few ones allowed to use his sword.
✴ loves matching outfits with you.
✴ he said, 'i love you' first. it was an accident when the two of you were in the middle of fighting monsters, and it just slipped.
✴ has your initials in a chain around his neck.
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imfoive · 3 months
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The Youngest Son - Chapter 1
Minho x Reader (fem.) Genre: non-idol au!, Suspense, Angst, Romance, Mature Warnings: mentions of drugs, cursing, death, physical assault, somewhat proofread WC: 2.8k A/N: A short read, just want to gauge if I should continue. Feedback is always welcome, enjoy! ── MASTERLIST
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Synopsis: The youngest son of the Lee family was stubborn, he was arrogant, he was conniving. Hiding it all behind the mask of a calm and collected man, the youngest son was a master at mind games. Playing a dangerous game where trust is a luxury and betrayal lurks around every corner. He had sworn once, to not let family ties or any feelings hold him back. Yet, against all odds, she had him completely wrapped around her fingers, and he had no desire to break free.
CHAPTER 1 ──────────────────── The youngest son of the Lee family was stubborn, he was arrogant, he was conniving. But he did a very good job at keeping it all hidden behind the persona of a perfect son. A calm and cool-headed man. The youngest son of the Lee family was a master at mind games.
At age ten, he learned that the woman he had called “mother” for as long as he could remember, was not his birth mother. Her unnecessary prejudice against him and cold shoulder she gave him out of the public eye, all began to make sense. He was a constant reminder of the unfaithful deeds her husband, his father, had done unbeknownst to her. At age ten he learned why he was treated differently than his older, dimwit brothers. enduring beatings for the slightest mistakes, weren’t for nothing. He learned from a young age that staying besides his grandfather, the patriarch, would keep him safer than he was alone. The old man didn’t pick favorites between his grandchildren, even if one was the product of a master-maid affair, afterall it was Lee blood that ran through the kids’ veins.
At thirteen he was sent to boarding school, abroad to soon learn the ropes of the family business. Though he fell at the bottom of the hierarchy in the Lee family, every member had to play their part, because that’s what it took to run one of the biggest industrial companies.
At fifteen, he met her. A enemies-to-aquaintances in the midst of a school filled with children from affluent families, where donations greased the wheels. Despite everyone trying to curry favor with him, he maintained a facade of a well-behaved young master. He wasn’t sure when this persona took root or how he managed to suppress his true emotions so effectively, but it became ingrained over time.
While others sought his friendship and the girls aimed to get closer, hoping for a future with the Lee family, she was the exception. She saw through his polite smiles and gentlemanly demeanor, refusing to play along with the charade. He found her scrutiny unsettling, as she saw past the facade he worked so hard to maintain. He didn’t like it one bit. 
The young master disliked the smirk on her face and the unreadable look in her gaze when she had him cornered. He felt vulnerable and was painfully aware of her intentions. She was establishing dominance, laying a foundation that challenged his carefully crafted image. And it didn’t help that her family was business friends with his. 
Business friends. 
They smiled for the cameras. Mingled in social gatherings. Shook hands, sent gifts. Their mothers would frequent the parlors together, shop together. But behind closed doors, they hated each other’s guts. Like every other conglomerate dynasty. But still, he couldn’t threaten her, or put it through her head that he was the one in charge. So he only kept tabs on her, letting her push him around, letting her be the boss. He was the class president, number one in the whole school, but bowed down to a brat who read him like an open book.
At twenty five, his heart pounded loudly against his chest, his eyes wide, cheeks feeling terribly hot as he stared into her own shocked gaze. Pressed against one another in a broom closet, his hand still pressed against her lips, he could feel her hot breath against his fingers.
The line between hatred and attraction began to blur.
He still vividly recalled the bitter taste that surged in his mouth when he heard the announcement of her engagement. Anger gripped him tightly, his hand clenching around the champagne glass. For a fleeting moment, his emotions flashed across his face before he regained his composure, masking his feelings as swiftly as they had surfaced. But it was too late—she had already caught that brief flicker of raw emotion.
Their eyes locked amidst the applause from the crowd, celebrating her and her new fiancé on stage. A chill ran down his spine at the intensity of their gaze. He hated the fact that he couldn’t decipher her expression as easily as she seemed to read him. Her father pulled her closer, placing her between himself and her future husband, while his own uncle chuckled, posing for the flashing cameras with his arm around his son's shoulder, nudging him towards her. Nearby, his cousin beamed at her, already envisioning their future together as husband and wife.
She was to marry into the Lee family. Becoming the bride of his older cousin—a union orchestrated for business rather than love.
He was pissed. And he didn’t understand why.
No.
He understood why, but still he smiled, clapping like everyone else in the crowd. Seeing his smile she copies, her fists clenched her dress into balls at her side, tearing away her eyes from him. Turning to the reporters and offering practiced smiles to the cameras. And he hates every bit of it.
After a few more glasses of champagne, several smiles exchanged with other businessmen in the hall, he finds himself lightheaded outside the event room, in some empty corridor of the hotel. Leaning against the wall with one hand, the other pressed to his head, his gaze fixates on the vivid red carpet beneath his feet. The vibrant color stands in stark contrast to the turmoil churning within him.
When did he drink so much?
Normally, he was adept at maintaining control over his alcohol consumption, always maintaining a balance between sobriety and intoxication. But right now, his head was pounding.
    “Hey Lee Minho!”
He recognized her voice instantly, a sound etched into his memory after a decade of hearing it call his name—whether sober, ill, or in any other state. 
Startled, he turned to see her approaching with purpose, her dress billowing around her in the wind stirred up by her hurried steps. Before he could react, she had him pinned against the wall he leaned on for support. He was disoriented, his eyes struggling to fixate on her furious expression while he attempted to stand upright, hand instinctively returning to his forehead. She intercepted his hand, pressing it against the wall alongside his other one, effectively trapping him.
The closeness of her presence, her firm grip on his hands, and the intensity in her eyes broke through his haze. He met her gaze, their faces mere inches apart, and in that moment, the barrier he had been building between them, built on years of tolerance, misunderstanding, and unspoken desires, began to crumble. Minho clung to that small bit of conscious control he had left, determined to remain stoic despite his trapped circumstance.
    “Why did you leave the hall?” Her question pierced through the heavy silence, her fingers tightening around his wrist as she searched his impassive gaze for answers.
    “I felt light headed.” He replied evenly, his voice betraying the turmoil swirling within him.
Her brows furrowed, uncertainty flickering in her eyes as they briefly glanced at his shirt before meeting him again.
    “Did you know about the engagement?” She asked softly, her voice tinged with vulnerability.
Minho opens his mouth, but his gaze flickered towards the distant sounds of people chatting down the hall. In a sudden move, he grasped her arm, surprising her, and swiftly ushered her through the nearest door.
    “What are—”
His hand presses against her lips, her whines could wait. The dark broom-closet was the last place someone would look in search for either of them. He didn’t need another mess of people catching him with his future sister-in-law pressed against each other in the halls of her parents’ hotel.
Except when he finally sighs after the footsteps outside the door fade into the distance, he realizes that was the exact situation they were in, but closer. Much closer. 
    “Minho.” She whispers, fingers pulling away at his hand that covered her mouth. 
Maybe it was the alcohol fully taking over, but her skin felt hot against his, the rise and fall of her chest brushing against him in a way that felt searingly hot. His heart pounded louder with each passing second. Her gaze hardened, a reminder that her anger hadn't dissipated.
    “Are you happy that I’m engaged to your cousin?”
Minho remained silent, swallowing hard to soothe his suddenly dry throat. Leaning his head back, he stared up at the dark ceiling, that bitter taste in his mouth returning. He could feel her eyes on him without needing to glance down at her, acutely aware of their proximity. His arm raised, maybe to pull her even closer or to push her away, he wasn’t sure exactly because his hand faltered in the air before dropping to his side, defeated.
    “Yeah I am.” 
No he wasn’t.
He looks down at her, smiling his fake smiles.
    “Congratulations, sister-in-law.” 
He hated it. 
The tears had welled in her eyes, and he chose to ignore them. He exits the closet, squinting at the bright light that seemed blindingly brighter after coming out of the dark room. He does his best to not look back, trying to walk-straight, away from her. Any longer and he might go back in there and do god knows what.
She remained frozen in the closet’s stillness, staring at the closed door where moments ago, they had shared a fleeting but charged encounter. It took her a moment to collect herself, wiping away the tears that had escaped her control. Then, anger simmered beneath the surface. She’d make him pay, she’d make him take back his words. She was good at doing that. 
Returning to the bustling main hall, she scanned the crowd for Minho, but he was conspicuously absent. Instead, she felt an unwelcome touch at the small of her back, causing her to flinch involuntarily. The fingers belonged to someone else, a reminder of her imminent future tied to the Lee family.
    “I was looking for you Y/N.”
Her fiancé, Jae, offered her a glass of champagne with a smile, his other hand deftly retrieving it from a passing server and passing it to her. She managed a forced smile of gratitude, accepting the drink amidst the constant click of cameras capturing their every move.
    “Thank you, Jae.” She murmured, the formality in her tone belying the lack of intimacy between them.
There was no respite from the public eye, no chance for a private moment. Reporters hovered nearby, snapping photos incessantly, amplifying her frustration. She longed to push him away or unleash her pent-up anger, but she restrained herself. Instead, she stood composed, facing him directly. Her fingers instinctively reached for his tie, straightening it with practiced precision.
    “You reek of alcohol.” She commented casually, her smile unwavering as she rested her hand on his jacket.
Jae smirked, glancing around briefly before leaning in closer to her.
    “Already starting to nag, huh?” His tone was more of annoyance than tease.
    “Better get used to it then.” She retorted, raising an eyebrow and tilting her head subtly, a hint of defiance underlying her compliant demeanor.
Jae had long understood her independence and resilience, attributes shaped by her status as the sole heiress to her family’s wealth. It was clear to him that she didn’t tolerate disrespect from anyone. Yet, Jae possessed his own confidence and a streak of cockiness, and he wasn't about to let her forget his presence.
    “We’ll see, baby.” He chuckled, his tone dropping as he drew her closer, a move intended to assert his control over the situation. Her involuntary shudder in response only fueled his ego, reinforcing his belief that he could handle her strong personality and keep her in check. ─────────────────────── Minho stood in front of the restroom mirror, the icy water splashed on his face offering a jolt that helped clear his mind. The cold sensation contrasted sharply with the heat of his skin, instantly sobering him up from the alcohol-induced haze. As he stared at his reflection, the running water echoed loudly in the otherwise eerie silence of the men's room.
His eyes locked onto his own, but his thoughts raced elsewhere—to the intense moment with Y/N in the dark broom closet. He vividly recalled the heat of her breath against his hand, her eyes fixed on him with a mixture of anticipation and uncertainty. A part of him wished he had kissed her, he had marked kissed bruises down her neck, claimed her as his. But his sane side reminded him of the harsh reality, suppressing his desires. Still, the memory of her pressed against him replayed in his mind, stirring emotions he struggled to reconcile with his usual composure.
    “Fuck.”
He mutters, almost pounding the sink handle shut.
He didn’t realize how long he had been holed away in the restroom, or exactly how long he had been thinking about her afterwards. Returning to the main event hall, he noticed that the crowd had thinned considerably, with guests beginning to depart as the night wore on. His secretary easily found him amidst the lingering attendees, gently pulling him aside to deliver news of an impending family meeting at the Lee estate the following morning. And to head home now that all the important guests have left.
So he does as he’s told. Like always. With a smile.
Minho found himself in a haze as his car pulled into the underground parking lot of his apartment complex. He was awake but disconnected, his mind lost in a whirl of thoughts and emotions from the evening. He mumbled a thank you to his secretary before stumbling out of the car, exhaustion weighing heavily on him.
The elevator ride to the fourteenth floor felt excruciatingly slow, each ding echoing in the eerie silence that seemed to follow him. Fumbling for his keycard as he approached his apartment door, he froze at the sight of a familiar figure crouched beside it. Her head turned at the sound of his footsteps, meeting his gaze with a mixture of relief and distress.
Y/N stood up abruptly as he approached, and before he could react, she ran towards him, her arms enveloping him in a tight embrace. Caught off guard, Minho stumbled backwards, her grip unyielding.
Tears streamed down her face, and Minho felt a surge of anxiety as he struggled to comprehend the suddenness of her presence and emotions. Her crying and shaking embrace were overwhelming, stirring conflicting feelings within him that he wasn’t prepared to confront.
    “What’s wrong—” He begins to say as he pulls her to face him, only to fall silent. 
His words faltered as he noticed the red mark on her cheek and the cut on her lower lip, dried blood marking its edges. Shock widened his eyes as he took in the sight, his mind racing to grasp the situation.
    “Jae-h-he attacked me.” She whispered through a sob.
His expression hardens at her words, she buries her head back into his chest, sniffing back cries loudly again, her cries echoing in the corridor. It was the first time he had ever seen her in such a vulnerable state, and it shook him to the core. His initial confusion and concern quickly turned to a fierce protectiveness, a surge of anger rising within him at the sight of her injuries.
Gently, he pulled her into his apartment, closing the door behind them. Without a word, he guided her to the couch, his movements careful yet urgent. He dressed her wound after finally calming her down. She’s been to his apartment plenty of times, uninvited mostly, bothering him. So seeing her in such a vulnerable state fascinated him, yet his heart clenched painfully. 
Minho knew exactly what it was, and why it was. But he was in denial.
There was no way he could want her.
Was he even allowed to feel that way?
As he studied her, he couldn't ignore the intensity in her gaze, how she watched him with a keen awareness that unsettled him.
But was she aware of the control she had over him?
That she had him completely under her spell? 
Closing the first-aid kit, he looks back at her, blood-red eyes and tear-stricken face.
Minho seethed with anger and frustration. He shouldn’t have let her leave that damn broom closet. He shouldn’t have let her get hurt. The thought of Jae laying hands on her ignited a fury within him he hadn’t felt in a while.
He gently rested his palm against her cheek, his touch surprisingly tender despite the storm of emotions raging inside him. This newfound side of him, fierce and protective, startled even himself. His gaze softened as he caressed her face, leaning in closer.
    “Should I kill him?” ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ to be continued.
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xenteaart · 4 months
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contemplating mediocrity
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pairing: idol!chan x reader (gn but written with f!reader in mind) word count: 0,9k genre/warnings: er, hurt to comfort, use of "baby", self-doubt, honestly not much else, pretty pg-13 author's note: heavily inspired by @withleeknow 's last seungmin fic, i couldn't handle the angst and needed to comfort myself fkdjfkdjfk. also it kinda made me reflect on why it hurt so bad so i guess this fic is a little support and comfort thingy for everyone who might not be feeling "enough". before reading you might wanna check out the inspo fic itself <3
“baby? what’s wrong?” 
ah, he’s always too quick to notice. 
you take your eyes off the laptop and put a video of 3racha’s festival performance on pause.
“nothing. you guys did a wonderful job, truly. ’m just… contemplating my mediocrity.”
“what?” he’s more just taken aback than anything else but you read it as irritation.
it’s one of those days when everything feels extra sensitive, even the things you can deal with well on a regular day.
“what? chris, baby, i’m not being self-deprecating, it’s just a fact. i truly could not be more proud of you, but sometimes i just can’t shake off the feeling of not doing enough compared to you. 
it warms my heart to know that you are so so loved and respected, it really does. but, i guess.. it’s a little humbling too? i haven’t achieved anything nearly as grand and i don’t have thousands of people cheering for me after i do as much as breathe. which you totally deserve, by the way, i’m not saying you don’t.”
long silence follows as chris frowns, carefully crafting his next response while you’re already starting to regret you opened your mouth at all. maybe, some things should be kept to yourself. maybe, it’s not really necessary to share every dark thought that comes to your pained mind after midnight. maybe, it’s safer for your relationship to just move those conversations to a cozy zoom meeting with your therapi—
“that’s a skewed perception of our dynamic though, baby.” 
oh, shit. he has the look. you know this one too well, and it says “i’m not letting this slide and we’re talking this through”. 
“how so?” you feel tired and discouraged already, mostly annoyed at yourself for making your boyfriend come up with some nonsense points to make you feel better now. 
“don’t put me on a pedestal. firstly, i think you’re forgetting how many people there actually are behind what we’re doing. daily. i’m talking all the staff and production teams, makeup, hair, clothes, art direction, schedule management. everything. there is literally a whole division for us that makes us look the way we look and helps us do what we love.”
you stay quiet, blinking slowly and pursing your lips together. 
“which isn’t to say we don’t work hard or that we haven’t achieved anything, but it wouldn’t have been possible without all that help. 
secondly, in my daily life i’m just a guy, baby. literally just a guy who loves music. nothing fancy,” chan gives you one of those wide soft smiles, and you hear your heart break a little. 
“yeah, well, not every guy who loves music has the amount of awards and recognition you do, baby.”
“okay, where is this truly going?”
there it goes.
“sometimes i worry i just can’t match it? that you’ll get bored of me because i’m not over the top extraordinary or... whatever.”
you feel stupid. 
“so you think i’m with you for your so-called achievements?”
you can’t come up with a response, so he continues, gently hugging you from behind and resting his chin on your shoulder. his favorite way of making you feel loved. 
“i’m with you because you’re my sense of normalcy, baby. you calm my mind when it’s racing too fast. you’re my safe little harbour where i can find peace after hectic schedules and loud noises and crowds. you ease the weight i carry on my shoulders every day.” 
you stay silent, focusing on the feeling of his warm breath on your cheek. the tip of his nose is touching your skin lightly.
“you love the regular channie. you kiss my puffy swollen face in the mornings, and those kisses make me wonder if i’m actually not that bad without all the makeup on after all. you laugh at my jokes and cuddle me when i get needy. you listen to my darkest nastiest thoughts and never judge me for feeling whatever it is i’m feeling. 
what i’m getting at is that... i can just be me around you, you know? that’s why i’m still here. and i feel so proud to have a partner with a big warm heart and a strong mind, honored to be cared for by someone so neat and beautiful in the most mundane things.
do you really think i’d measure my love and respect for you by something like fame or... some noble achievements?”
“i don’t know,” you sound even more confused than at the beginning of this suddenly serious conversation, caught off guard by chan’s words, but mostly — his tenderness towards you. his patience and the way he's willing to spell it out for you if you're feeling too low to see the whole picture yourself.
"well, then i’m telling you. that is just not the case. you’re already everything i could ask for, baby. someone passionate, honest, reliable, loving and kind. someone who holds my hands through the hard days and makes me laugh on the good days. simple as that."
the pressure on your chest is slowly fading as chan's words finally sinking in, finding their ways into your system and rendering as the truth. the ache isn't completely gone but you know it will be in the morning, when the sunrise washes the rest of your worries away.
for now, you turn around in chris's embrace and hide your nose in the crook of his neck, simply breathing and enjoying the lingering scent of his soap. skin to skin.
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umeuyenicorn · 4 months
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Thank all of you for participating in suggesting me the gift ideas, I love them all! The results are here
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Special thanks to them for suggesting the ideas on this poll:
@eldritchmoos | @shinystealingbirb | @owlishhhhh | @misty-lilies | @starstruckfangirl2018 | @koby-lux | @chynandri | @shhhhhgobacktosleep | @izzy-fishy | @K4shuu
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renthony · 5 months
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Official Commission Info Post
(Updated July 8, 2024. Copied over from my main website.)
Pay me to write about a topic of your choice!
Provide me with a topic related to my areas of interest, and I’ll share my expertise, opinions, and insights. My areas of interest/expertise include speculative fiction (sci-fi/fantasy), fiction writing, literature studies, television & film studies, media censorship, animation, and pop/fandom culture.
Note: You choose the topic, not the angle. You can’t pay me to write any amount on the topic, “why Ren’s favorite thing is actually bad,” or, “why Ren’s least-favorite politician is actually a superhero.” I reserve the right to refuse any commission for any reason, with money refunded where necessary. I retain full credit and ownership of my writing—meaning I don’t do homework and I don’t do ghostwriting.
Examples of my work can be found at this link. Further info below the cut.
Rates
$25 USD for 500 words.
Up to 3k words @ $0.05 USD per word.
Over 3k words @ $0.15 per word.
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I’m disabled and have inconsistent energy levels, so turnaround times may vary depending on my health. At minimum, 500 word essays typically take me about a week, 3k takes about two weeks, and 5k papers take about a month. If there are any unexpected delays to my work, health-related or otherwise, I will email you with an updated turnaround estimate as needed.
À La Carte
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General 500 Word Topics
500 words doesn’t give me much space, so these commissions are great for getting my basic thoughts and opinions on a topic. You can use the following list as simple prompts on their own, or as a springboard to come up with your own, more specific prompt.
Science Fiction
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3k Essay Prompts:
These topics require a little more space to dig into, so I need at least 3,000 words to do them justice. You can also request any of the prompts from the 500 word prompt list for a more robust essay on the topic.
Always Watch the Background Actors: How Learning Stage Combat Improved My Moviegoing Experience
Animation and Musicals: Misunderstood Non-Genres
Draw from the Heart: Using Familiar Settings to Craft New Worlds
Worldbuilding: Avoiding the Planet of Hats Trope
Worldbuilding: Utilizing Elements of Culture
5k Research Paper Topics:
These are the big topics that will require research, citations, and several long weeks of work. I can write as much on the topic as you want, but it must be at least 5,000 words. You can also request any of the prompts from the 500 word or 3k word prompt lists for more robust essays on the topic.
Killing the Cat: Violence Against the Vulnerable as Sloppy Narrative Shorthand
It Wasn't a Damn Door: Why Jack Dawson Had to Die
Bury Your Gays on Solstheim: Queer Representation in the Elder Scrolls
Invisibility or the Freakshow: Intersex Representation on American Television
The Nuke in the Room: Political Allegory in Samurai Jack
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For a 15% discount, you may also email me with proof that you have requested my short story, The Queen of Cups, at your local library! For a 25% discount, submit proof that you have requested both my short story, The Queen of Cups, and my wife’s novel, The Last Girl Scout.
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Note
Do you have any advice for writing with adhd? I can craft these elaborate storyline in my head, but the minute I try to write any of them down I get bored. (Or is that just regular writer block?) It's really discouraging, because I feel like my mind is moving faster then my head, and any time I try to bring any of my ideas to life it just disipates.
Writing with ADHD: 5 Game Changers for Me
Here are some things that have been game changers for me as a writer with ADHD: [Edit: everyone's ADHD is different. This is just what works for me. It may not work for you...]
Planning: It's different for everyone with ADHD, but for me it's essential to spend time planning my story before I start writing. I like to flesh out as much as possible concerning plot, timeline, setting, world, characters and arcs, subplots, and themes.
Summary, Outline, and Scene List: Three items that are critical for me to have in hand before I sit down to write are a beginning to end summary of the story detailing all plot events as far as I know, an outline loosely based on the story structure template/s that feel right for the story (for example, I may use elements of Save the Cat! and some elements of of the Six-Stage Plot Structure), which helps me navigate my plot and hit the relevant plot points. And finally, I need a detailed scene list/timeline combo which lists chapter, scene, date/time, POV character, location, and a one to two sentence summary of what happens in the scene, including the character's goal in the scene, the scene's conflict, and the scene's resolution or how it carries into a later scene.
Gamifying: When I'm struggling with a particular time period or project, it can help me to gamify things. You can do this using a game board strategy, the Yahtzee Method, making a list of bench marks that serve as "levels," race against yourself by trying to bet the previous day's goal, etc. The key to gamifying is to set reasonable benchmarks and give yourself periodic rewards. Rewards can be anything from buying yourself a boba, watching a favorite TV show episode, an hour of playing your favorite game, or going to a movie. Some people like to go to the dollar store and buy a lot of small fun things and use those as rewards. Whatever works for you! Sometimes, turning it into a game with tangible progress and rewards can keep you motivated.
Setting Up a Routine: Although I have my general daily routine, I am without a doubt more productive when I can stick to a more specific routine that includes writing time. For me that works out to writing early in the day before other distractions start ramping up. When I put on my music, sit down with some coffee and a snack, and pull up my manuscript, my brain knows it's time to get to work. That doesn't always mean the work happens, but it's much more likely I'll get something done.
Minimizing Distractions: Anything that can be a distraction when I write is problematic. For that reason, I only listen to music without words and advertising. I turn off my phone or leave it in the other room. If possible, I try to use placeholders for things I need to look up. If I absolutely have to look something up and I get distracted by headlines, interesting articles or videos, or other things, I bookmark them in a special folder and immediately close the window. That way, I know I can go back to them later (I almost never do...) And, for me, as much as I love Scrivener and the ability to organize by chapter, have quick access to character profiles and photos, toggle between scene cards and my story... it's just too distracting for me. I'll sit down to write a chapter, then decide I need to re-do my scene cards, or cast characters, or do mood boards for every location in my story.
For that reason, writing in Word works best [for me] It's simple and there's nothing to distract me. Any story references I might need while writing, such as character profiles and photos, mood boards and aesthetics, setting inspiration photos, etc. are all organized in a special folder, categorized into sub-folders, so I can go straight to the required reference.
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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!
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