#finally my english degree putting the work in

[thegaycondor]

this is the ask about ninth house and dantes inferno, from someone who loves both and woud love to hear the theories!

i feel like this is less theories and more analysis of textual influence. while we don't get the one to one journey into hell comparison there is a lot of things that perk my interest as a little literary goblin. truly truly there's way to much for me to get into all the little things that i think have a connection to dante, but i will get into some of the basic characteristics of hell and how they are mimicked in hellbent, along with the more direct literary references. however if you want another post about other parts(the leopard, lion and she-wolf characteristics being able to be transplanted onto alex,, the call into hell/darlington & beatrice comparisons,, the roles of virgil and dante,, etc.) , i will do it.

ok, brace your self for a far too short analysis

the most glaring reference we get to dante's inferno is bardugo labeling part 2 "the descent"[242] directly after dante's canto 2. not to mention the titles of lethe themselves being derived from the story. i cannot find it but i believe someone in either hellbent or ninth house say "abandon all hope ye who enter here" (if anyone can find where this is said i would be eternally grateful). ok so, it's known that leigh took some inspiration from dante, but let's get into how she characterizes hell in comparison to dante's version.

the beginning of canto 1 and chapter 27 start very similar. in dante's inferno(working from John Ciardi's translation), we start alone in a "dark wood" which is is "so rank, so arduous" that "it's very memory gives a shape to fear" [1.3-7], with a dawn sky over head. in hellbent we start in a similar state. alex finds herself alone, in an orchard, feeling afraid, confused, and lost. specifically the journey was supposed to cause fear, just as the forest for the lost souls in the first canto.

then just as the group find the hope of getting darlington, they are attacked by wolves. while wolves and dogs make multiple appearances in the inferno, the most notable is the she-wolf seen in that first canto, right before virgil comes in. if this is a one to one comparison(not suggesting it should be), than these wolves are the counterpart to the leopard, lion, and she-wolf. they represent the sins committed by the group, while also preventing them from bringing their and darlingtons soul to safety, or salvation.

i could go into more details about other things that come to fortition when looking at hellbent through the lens of dante's inferno. i would love to talk about alex and the wolves in the inferno, but i could fully write a 10 page paper on it if i wanted to. honestly if you already like/own/have read the inferno, i just recommend reading the two books in tandem to each other. it's fascinating.

[silhouettecrow]

365 Days of Writing Prompts: Day 249

Adjective: Raw

Noun: War

Definitions for those who need/want them:

Raw: (of food) uncooked; (of a material or substance) in its natural state, or not yet processed or purified; (of information) not analyzed, evaluated, or processed for use; (of a part of the body) red and painful, especially as the result of skin abrasion; (of an emotion or quality) strong and undisguised; frank and realistic in the depiction of unpleasant facts or situations; (informal) (US) (of language) coarse or crude, typically in relation to sexual matters; (of the weather) bleak, cold, and damp; (of a person) new to an activity or job and therefore lacking experience or skill; (of the edge of a piece of cloth) not having a hem or selvage

War: a state of armed conflict between different nations or states or different groups within a nation or state; a particular armed conflict; a state of competition, conflict, or hostility between different people or groups; a sustained effort to deal with or end a particular unpleasant or undesirable situation or condition

[reiderwriter]

For some reason my comments don't come through on your posts, but I want to first say I absolutely love your writing and I'm so happy your requests are open!! 🥰😭 So I've had this idea of a fluff mixed with spencer angst where reader is maybe interning at Diana's facility (not a dr yet, studying) and becomes close with Diana by reading, chatting, etc and Spencer over hears it from time to time and the dialogue between spencer and reader gets too close for Spencers comfort, but Diana wants her around more. Thank you again for your hard work okay bye!

A/N: I've never written a fic with Diana in it before, so this was a bit of a challenge for me, bit I enjoyed writing it a lot! Hopefully, this is somewhat like what you wanted!! ❤️

Warnings: Spencer is a bit dense (real) and puts his foot in his mouth (metaphorically, of course).

Diana Reid's son was exactly the way she described him, down to the tiny curls at the base of his neck and the glimmer of intelligence in his eye. 

After four weeks interning at the care facility while working on your medical degree, you'd spent a considerable amount of time with your favorite patient, and her stories about her son were legendary. 

At first, you weren't sure whether to believe the woman when she said her son was a genius with an IQ of 187, three PhDs, and a job in the FBI. She wouldn't be the first schizophrenic patient to muddle up her facts, but she certainly was the sweetest. 

So when you recalled your conversation with the head nurse later that day, she laughed and confirmed every story about Doctor Spencer Reid. Your mouth hung open in shock because surely nobody that incredible could just be out walking the streets. 

Another month of conversations about the man, and you were half in love with him. He wrote his mother letters every day - hand wrote them, even - and she's shown you a few. He'd talked about his friends, his team, his jobs, and how he was saving lives. And when one of the latest ones dropped in the news that he'd be free for a visit soon, you found yourself overflowing with anticipation. 

Of course, you felt like you already knew the man. You knew what his first words were, what his favorite toy was growing up, and even about the exploits of his first date, as pitiful as it was. What you didn't know was if Diana was passing along similar information about you. 

The day Spencer Reid finally showed up, he took your breath away. You were mostly in awe of Diana's ability to describe her son perfectly, though you'd grown fond of her perfectly professional English Lecturer tone of speaking over the last few weeks. She was practically lyrical when talking her son into existence. 

“His hair curls beautifully. He's my little adonis. He keeps it too long though, I'm always telling him he needs to cut it because it hides too much of his face,” she'd told you one day before picking her book up and ignoring you for the next half hour. 

“My Spencer is delightfully tall. He's a little bit spindly like a spider. He's not the most grateful, that's for sure, we used to call him crash because he was always bumping into things. Poetic, right?” 

You knew from the second he walked through the door that this man was him. 

Tall, slightly hunched, clutching his satchel strap in his hand, terrifyingly handsome and making your hand jump into your throat. Definitely him, and definitely a problem. You'd have to check the code of conduct about falling hopelessly for a patient's beautiful son. 

If you had any doubts, this was Spencer in front of you though, when he bumped into a chair just as he was about to reach his mother, it was confirmed. 

“Diana, I believe your Crash is here,” you smiled and giggled, watching her turn quickly to greet her son. 

You, too, gave him a warm smile, but he seemed a little hesitant to return it, instead greeting his mother softly and sitting with her while you retreated slightly to give them some privacy. 

You hovered in the space, as Diana had been talking about introducing the two of you all week, and you didn't want to distress her if she couldn't find you close by. 

But though Spencer was closely attentive and soft with his mother, he took brief pauses to stare almost frustratedly at you. You weren't sure what it was, but something about you was setting Spencer on edge, and that in itself was unsettling you as well. 

“Oh, Spencer, you must meet our Y/N. Y/N, come here, this is my son, Spencer.”

Slightly more apprehensive now, you held out your hand to shake his, “I've heard so much about you  it's nice to finally be seeing you in person, Doctor Reid.” 

He didn't shake your hand, though, but awkwardly waved it off quickly, leaving you to awkwardly replace it by your side. 

“Nice to meet you. Are you a new attendant? I asked all updates about my mother's companions to be confirmed and passed on to me, patient and carers included.” 

His tone was business-like and clipped, and you could see a gentle annoyance settling on his features. 

“I'm sorry, Doctor Reid, I thought Diana would have told you in a letter, or the administration would've passed it on. I'm a medical student on an internship.” You felt like you'd been chastised by an irate parent though he'd at no point raised his voice or indicated in his words any sense of anger at all. His eyes burned across your skin, though, and you felt a flame heat your skin under the weight of his stare. 

“You're mother has told me a lot about you though, she reads me your letters sometimes, between our discussions of Marjorie Kempe.” 

“My letters? Mom, we've talked about this. Those are private.” You looked at the quiet disappointment on Diana's face and felt protective over the woman all of a sudden.

“Please, I'm sorry for overstepping, but your mother is just very proud of you. She talks about you a lot actually, and your job-” 

“With all due respect, Y/N, the last time my mother talked to a new friend about me, he traveled to Virginia and shot one of my friends, so this really is a conversation I'd rather not be having.”

Your heart dropped into your stomach as he turned back to his mother and started talking to her gently again about personal security, effectively dismissing you from the conversation. 

You'd had stupid hopes for Spencer Reid, and that's all they would ever be. 

Reid talked on, and you left him alone with his mother, though she seemed distracted by your departure. 

“Spencer, that wasn't nice. Look at that poor girl. She's close to tears.”

“What? Mom, are you even listening to me?” 

“No, and I likely won't until you go and apologize to Y/N. She's a pretty girl, Spencer, and she was very excited to meet you.” 

“Pretty…. Mom, please.” 

“What, do you disagree? You think I don't know you well enough to know when a girl would suit you well? Or do you think I'm blind to the fact that you were stealing glances at her before she introduced herself.” 

Spencer went quiet at having been caught, and he hated to accept that maybe his mother was right. 

It was true as well that the care facility had informed him of medical interns coming and going in the next few months, and really, she wasn't to blame for his mother being fond of him. 

He was glad, though, that neither of them had noticed the ten minutes he'd spent just outside the large sitting area watching them talk. He'd been obviously taken aback to see someone new so close to his mom and his mom similarly comfortable. He felt even worse for the fact that for a solid minute and a half, he'd stared at the girl with no other thought in his head than the sound of his heart skipping a questioning beat. 

He'd pulled himself out of it eventually, but only when another nurse had come along to ask him if he'd actually be visiting his mother today or just dropping in to check on her. 

And then he'd bumped into that infernal chair when he was so fixated on getting to them, and she'd opened her mouth and called him crash, and his heart had sank. 

He reminded himself it was neither of their faults and inwardly cursed himself for being so unfriendly with someone who'd taken such good care of his mother recently. 

He promised himself that he'd talk with his mom and then go and find the woman, and apologising for being such a brute. 

“Spencer, are you listening to me, or are you busy daydreaming about my nurse?” 

“Mom!” 

“You're plain as day, kiddo, you'll never get anything past me. Now please, leave me be, I'm reading. Come back later if you must, but for now, take this to Y/N for me, please. She left it with me to read this morning, but I'm not in the mood for Medieval Romance right now.” 

It was a blatant lie, but a dismissal nonetheless, and Spencer quietly took his chance to search for you in the halls. 

The head nurse humorously pointed him in the right direction without him asking, much to his annoyance, but he persisted and lightly tapped on your shoulder to greet you. 

“Oh, Doctor Reid, hello again.” You smiled a little smaller this time, still polite, but he watched the way it didn't reach your eyes and felt like a jackass all over again. 

“My mom told me to come return this book to you.” He held out the book, and you quietly took it, folding it into your arms and hugging it tightly against your chest as you both stood there silently after the exchange. 

“I'm sorry, as well. I wasn't exactly very friendly back there, because-” 

“It's okay, Doctor Reid, you really don't have to explain. I overstepped, it's my fault and it won't happen again.”

“Are you kidding? My mom hasn't looked that relaxed in years. Please keep overstepping.” 

Your smile widened slightly at the compliment, and Spencer's tongue kicked into hyper drive immediately at the sight, even as his brain powered off. 

“You're pretty,” he blurted out, stopping only as his brain caught up with his tongue before firing off again. “My mom said you're pretty. I agree as well, though, you have a nice smile, and it's better when you don't force it. Not that I'm telling you how to smile, though. I don't know why I'm telling you this, but my mom made me come over here and talk to you, even though I'm pretty sure that's her book and not one you loaned her.” 

He took a moment to catch his breath as you blinked at him in confusion, heart beating rapidly even as you heard the blood rushing through your ears. 

“If you're free now, would you want to grab a coffee? Unless you have a boyfriend. Or husband. Or girlfriend or wife, I guess, I don't mean to presume. But if you're free, as in time, and free as in, like, relationship wise, I'd like to buy you a coffee to thank you for listening to my mom.” 

He finally stopped, and you stared wondrously at the reddened skin of his cheeks as he held his breath, waiting for your reply. 

“You want to take me out for coffee to thank me?” 

“Yes.” 

“And on a separate note, I'm pretty, and you want to know if I'm in a relationship?” 

“I'm sorry, you don't have to tell me, I'll just see myself out. It was a stupid idea anyway-” 

“No, wait, Spencer! Let me… let me grab my coat. My lunch break is in half an hour, and I'm sure it'll be okay to take it early.” You held his arm for a second, stepping slightly too close for comfort before realising yourself and taking a tiny step back.

He stood and blinked in your direction, as though wondering seriously for a moment what your lunch break had to do with him. 

“Are you going to stand there staring at me, or are we going to go out?” 

“You're serious?” 

“I guess…. I guess I am.”

“And you're… you're single.” 

Your mouth went dry as his skin finally completed its transformation from vampiric to tomato red. You desperately hoped your own embarrassment wasn't equally as readable on your face. 

“Quite single. Medical students don't have that much time to date.”

“Neither do FBI agents.” 

“Perhaps a subject we could talk more about later?” 

“Definitely.” 

[steviewashere]

I want to write something sort of meta, hear me out on it. Sorry, if this hits too close to home. The idea came to me and I needed to get it out of my system. And...would you look at that, another half-written fic.

Steve ends up getting really into Star Wars after Dustin shows him to it. Like, so much that he gets himself involved with conventions, cosplay, collecting anything and everything he can. He's involved in a fandom space. Learns the world of fan fiction. And let's say that maybe, during his time figuring out where he wants to go with life, he picks up writing fanfic as a hobby.

It encourages him to get an English degree. Encourages him to lean more into that hobby, but then expanding upon it to write original short stories and small novels that go published. But he holds strong to Star Wars and fandom and finding his spot cemented in it. He's been a fan for...nearly forty years at this point (set in 2024, ugh I know).

And maybe he dabbles in online spaces here and there. He ignores the insufferable adults in the Star Wars fandom (the "um, actually..." guys, btw). Indulges the effort of typing out his handwritten fan fiction, ones he used to bring and pass around at conventions, ones he'd let Eddie read with a shy look in his eyes. And he posts them online, has a Tumblr account, maybe does a few short things on Twitter, definitely is on AO3 (albeit newer, having never attempted online fan work before).

But then...then he gets his first little bit of hate. Vicious, gross comments on his work. Sometimes in private messages. Even publicly, once, on Twitter. It irks him. He holds strong, he does. But then it gets worse and worse and somehow, worse. Younger people claiming he's too old, others claiming that he can't write for certain characters because they're out of his age range, that he can't ship certain people, he can't say that a character would do this or that, that Star Wars is media for a younger audience (despite being somebody who saw it "back in the day"). But that he...That he's not supposed to be there.

And that last little comment sticks with him for a long time. It makes his effort and his attention and his love for writing fanworks falter. He stops. Thinks about the characters he loves, of Leia and Han or even Luke and Han or Lando and Han (listen he loves writing Han). But then he wonders if it's even worth it, to indulge this interest anymore. Yeah, maybe he's older than the source material. Sure, maybe he was introduced to it a little later than most, but that doesn't mean he doesn't love it. Yet, his attention towards Star Wars completely falls away.

He stops watching it. His DVDs going dusty and unused. Starts putting away all his action figures, because what if he posts a photo one day and somebody sees them and claims that that's not for him and—

Then, he goes completely offline from fandom. Even if he still gets the emails from users who actually enjoy his stuff, ignoring them completely. Focuses on using the internet for work. For his novels, for the little stories he actually gets paid to write. But his work just isn't the same. The passion, despite being an original story and original source material, is completely dwindled.

His hobby has been stripped from him. His interest has been knocked straight out of his hands. And he just...moves on.

Even if it hurts to go down into the basement of he and Eddie's home, eyes catching on the see-through bins of original action figures, Lego sets, comic books. Even if it makes something strangle in his chest when he opens up the browser on his phone and it immediately opens to a new ship he'd been getting into: Din Djarin/Luke Skywalker—because he finally picked up The Mandalorian, because he was finally talked into watching it when he had the free time.

And then it all bursts over when Eddie finally approaches him about it, when they're enjoying a night-in, sitting around lazily on their sofa.

"There's a convention coming into town," he comments, "supposedly, Hayden Christensen is going to be there. We should go, try and meet him."

Steve just grunts in response.

"Oh-kay...or we could just stay home and watch the movie?" Eddie suggests. "Been a while since I've seen Darth on screen, telling Luke about"—

"I don't want to," Steve cuts in quietly, "isn't really my thing anymore."

Silence then follows. For a beat. Then two. A third.

"Not your thing?" Eddie asks him incredulously. "Not too long ago you were raving all about that new show that's coming out! That you saw they were doing lightsaber whips and you were excited to see how they worked! What do you mean it's 'not your thing'?"

Steve shrugs. "Grew out of it or whatever. Got more important things to focus on now." He sniffs, trying to keep himself held together, grumpy and firm in his decision.

Eddie's stare drills into the side of his face. Scalding, just like that lava was in Revenge of The Sith. "Baby," he speaks softly, "did something happen? You haven't even...you don't read your beautiful little stories to me anymore. In fact, now that I think about it, I haven't even seen your lightsabers around here. What's goin' on?"

He fiddles with the hem of his shirt. A ratty plain white t-shirt that he wears now when he's lounging around the house. It used to be one with the Millennium Falcon on it, but that's tucked down far in his dresser. Not for him anymore.

"Steve," Eddie presses, "did something happen?"

His stare stays down at his lap, still fiddling with his shirt. Fingers flexing unfamiliarly in the strings, unlike the loose ones on his Star Wars shirts. "I just"—Steve heaves a deep sigh—"it's time I grow up. It's...not for me anymore. Too old for it now, I guess."

"You guess or you know? Because nobody's too old for anything. Unless, y'know, you're like eighty-nine and in terrible health and trying to hike Everest, then..."

Despite everything, Steve finds himself chuckling. A giddy little sound here and gone in a breath. He shrugs again, albeit smaller this time. Crumbling within himself. Quietly, honestly, he admits, "People were being mean to me about it online. About my writing. That I'm doing it wrong, that I—that I'm too old for it. That I don't belong because of my age." He finally brings himself to look at Eddie, blearily because his eyes are aching and wet. "I got to thinking and I...maybe I've just been too caught up in my own bliss to realize that those people are right. They're right and I shouldn't be into kids stuff anymore."

Eddie makes a soft, sad cooing noise in the back of his throat. "Oh, baby," he breathes. "Baby, those people don't know a single damn thing about your love. But...but I do. I know that you've seen every single Star Wars movie more times than I've probably eaten in my entire life. And what about all those Halloween costumes over the years? I didn't dress up like Leia for nothing, Mr. Solo."

Steve scoffs wetly. Goes to protest, but—

"And...and that handshake! The one with Dustin? You guys have had that for nearly forty fucking years! So, why bother indulging any of these...these hardasses on the internet? Did they sit next to you on the sofa as you fucking curled yourself like a shrimp and wrote every little intricate detail of a kiss between Luke and Han? Have they read your work while you blushed all shy, while you tucked your hair behind your ear and asked for the most earnest of feedback, to make sure you spelt things correctly or put a comma in the right place? These people, did they get to see you blossom and grow like a fucking bushel of roses over your hobby?

"Because I know I did. And even though you were nervous about your words on the paper, you still came to me. You still wrote and wrote and wrote until I had to bully you into breaks, just so you wouldn't ruin your poor wrists. If they had even an ounce of the passion that you do, they could write their own stories. They can make their own endings and make the characters the way they imagine them.

"They choose, instead, to—what—make fun of you because you have a space to express yourself? Because you found passion and turned it into something so beautiful, even I—a dungeon master, someone supposed to be amazing at storytelling—can't put into words? You found a way to do that, Steve. And you do that with kindness. You do it for free, mind you. If their only passion sits within sending you vitriol over people who aren't even remotely close to real, then they're the ones who don't belong.

"If I've learned anything, fandom is a space to share and bounce off each other's words. It's community and it's belonging and it's sharing what you love because you just love it. Fandom isn't bullying. Bullying is just bullying, Steve.

"And everything you've ever done in your life, in regards to fandom and outside of it, is so much better than hate. You may be a nerd or...or a little bit overzealous or whatever, but at least you aren't hateful. I think being hateful, that's worse—don't you think?"

Steve can only stare in response, fast tears down his cheeks, hands shaking in his shirt. Mind reeling. Because, yes, Eddie's right. And he maybe should've talked about it initially, but the hurt festered and festered and tangled and grew until he was nothing but an unhealed scab. And Eddie, he's the antiseptic to his uncovered cuts—the ones deep on his heart, where all his love is—even for things considered mundane, like movies, like TV shows.

"Steve," Eddie carefully murmurs, wrapping Steve's hands with his own, "you don't have to do something right to love it. You don't have to be a certain way to be happy. If Star Wars made you happy, then why give it up?"

He sniffles and chokes back on a sob. Because, again—damnit—Eddie's right. "I miss it," he admits quietly, "all I've done is miss it."

Eddie gives him a small smile. Something achingly soft that reaches deep within Steve. "Then open your arms and welcome it back, baby," he whispers, "even if you can't be online anymore, do it for yourself."

"I...I want to try it again, I'm just...scared. What if people hate it all over again? What if they're just nasty to me and shut me down and push me to the side and"—

"But what if they love it? What if your readers have missed you just as much?"

"You think?" he meekly asks.

Eddie's eyes widen and his eyebrows shoot up his forehead. "I know, actually. Your emails keep coming in on the computer's desktop because I keep forgetting to log you out. And, baby, you would not believe how many people have been eager for updates, for your return." His thumbs work into the backs of Steve's hands, warm and sure. "And, if it helps, maybe I can moderate your comments before you look at 'em? I'll read them to myself and if they're mean, I'll delete them."

Steve blows out a breathy little chuckle. "You'll just get mad at them," he gently teases. "But that doesn't sound too bad. Maybe I should try again. Not yet, though. I'm not ready."

"That's okay," Eddie assures, "take things slow. Maybe we start with watching the movies again? Getting your lightsabers back on display?"

"Can we go to the convention, too?"

"We can do whatever you want, Stevie."

For the first time in a long while, Steve finds himself smiling. "I love you," he whispers.

"I know."

[onelittlespiral]

Hey dude, I'm just a lil bro looking for a big bro to take care of me in all sorts of ways but all I'm stuck with is my lousy nerd of a roommate. Could you help me out?

FML: Fraternize

My roommate was… chill all things considered. I don’t know, he was just the random guy that I got stuck with when all my bros decided to move into the house and I needed someone to take the lease with. Scruffy, for sure. A bit out of shape. He said he used to play soccer in high school. Cute, but that was about it. Nowadays he was just getting his degree in English. Just a guy. But I didn’t want just another guy.

I tried to be friends with the guy, but he always just blew me and my boys off. He would just say he was too busy studying or playing some video game to come out to the gym with us or hang at the frat. I finally decided I was fed up. I needed my roommate to be more than a rando in my house. I needed a bro. And the fraternity had some resources to make that happen.

They usually keep this kinda stuff for pledges who start stepping out of line, but my buddy slipped me the files that they show to help guys get in line. I don’t remember if I ever saw them myself… what ever. It was a series of videos that promised to turn any guy into a bro in no time flat. So, one night, I put the tapes on when my roommate was home:

“Hey man, I’ve gotta watch these for class, mind if I slip them on?”

“No problem, I’ll just hang out in my bedroom.”

“Actually, it may be something you would like. You should stay. Here, you chill here and I’ll listen while I cook. I’ll make enough to split.”

I turned the first tape on and went to cook up some chicken and rice. In the other room, I heard the video beginning. It wasn’t long before I started hearing my roommate responding to the commands:

You are loyal to your bros.

“I am loyal to my bros.”

When you are around them you feel relaxed.

“When I am around them I feel relaxed”

The gym feels like your second home.

“The gym feels like my second home.”

The frat is life. You are made to be loyal to the frat.

“I am made to be loyal to the frat.”

They kept pushing him in the background while I finished cooking some food. When I walked back into the room, static filled the screen as my roommate stared into space, drool dripping from his mouth. I turned of the TV and he seemed to come to his senses.

“Hey, sup bro? Got the fuel?”

Already he was much better, “Yeah man, chicken and rice.”

“Hell yeah, gotta get a good workout in before getting my homework done.”

We ate quickly and started getting ready for the gym.

“Hey, bro, you think they are still taking new pledges? I’ve been meaning to apply to your frat!”

I was shocked at how quick the progress had been, “Yeah man. I’ll hook you up with my peeps tomorrow.”

“Sweet, let me finish getting ready and we can go.”

Dang those videos were quick. Even the way he carried himself was so different. This is the bro I needed.

The week went on and we kept working out. I hooked my roommate up with the pledge master and he quickly started falling in with the bros. We worked out, partied, did almost everything together now. I gave the rest of the tapes back to my guy who gave them to me. He said he needed them for a few guys who had gotten a little hands-y with some girls at the last party. I was fine to get them back, I didn’t think there would be any more issues with my roommate.

The year flew by until it was time for spring break. I had opted to be my roommate’s big and done all the usual hazing and shit with him. Had to keep him on his A game, I wasn’t going to go east on him. The spring break frat trip was a rite of passage for the incoming pledges. As much as I wanted to go, I had plans to visit California with my partner. We were having a great time, chilling at the beach, shopping through souvenir stores, and hiking parks. But I made sure to get updates about how my roommate was enjoying his week. It was from one of these progress reports that I got word from the pledge master:

Hey, bro. Just letting you know. Your little bro was making some girls uncomfortable at the bar. Can’t have that causing issues for the frat.

Shit man. I’m sorry. Lemme talk to him.

Nah dude, it’s good. We have a protocol for these kinds things. Just letting you know so you aren’t surprised. We’ll make sure he won’t bother any girls again.

Thanks dude. Lemme know if you need anything.

Nah bruh, relax. Enjoy your vacay.

Well as long as they have shit handled. I went back to my vacation and forgot about the whole situation. I would give him crap for it when I got back. The rest of our trip was great. I didn’t hear anything more from my bros so I assumed it all went according to plan. I was eager to get back to my roommate and prep him for full brotherhood when I got back. It wasn’t till I walked into the apartment I knew something was awry:

“Sup, bro, welcome back.”

A deep voice echoed from the balcony. He stepped inside and was greeted by a stranger. His arms were as thick as a football, his legs as thick as tree trunks. The smell of sweat, sex, and stale beer followed him into the room. He had a fresh tattoo on his arm with the number 86 boldly displayed. The stranger walked with swagger up to me, like he owned the place. As he approached, his musk only grew more intense. It wasn’t until I noticed the glasses it all clicked into place:

“Bro… is that you?!?”

“Bruh, who else would it be?”

My roommate stood proudly in front of me. He had been going to the gym steadily but no amount of protein powder could explain the progress he had made in a week. He was also easily 3 inches taller. And the smell. I don’t know how to describe it but he smelled… virile. Like just being around him was starting to get me excited. He certainly had never been like this before.

“Looking good, right? Like the new tat? Year of our chapter’s founding, 1986. After all, I am made to be loyal to the frat.”

That line made it all click together. The tapes. They said they would handle the situation, I didn’t know they would use the tapes.

”Speaking of which, dude. I can’t believe you flaked on the frat and went on a trip with your partner. You’ve got to be loyal to your bros.”

His scent, his words, my mind was swimming in a way it hadn’t in a long time. He stepped towards me, grabbing my head. I was pulled into his pit. I tried to pull back but a hand on the back of my head held me firmly in place. I felt so aroused and so scared as I was forced to huff the scent of pure frat bro. I was… fading. I couldn’t… resist… my… my… bruhhhhh.

“I think that you should sit through the next set with me bro.”

My mind was blank as he told me to sit down on the couch. Of course, I would do anything for my frat bro. He put on a video and sat behind me.

“They said we could watch this one together.”

The video whirled to life as my roommate held me in place in his lap. A flash of color and a brief intro played. It explained that it was the last in a series of videos for brothers who were trouble makers in the frat. This last one was the most extreme. I felt a wave of guilt, knowing I had betrayed my brothers and the chapter. I wasn’t sure what I did but I knew it must be bad. My behavior had to change.

You will conform to the standard set by the frat, whatever it takes. You will be entirely dedicated to the brotherhood.

“I will be entirely dedicated to the brotherhood,” we both repeated, in unison.

Good. Since you have proven you can’t be trusted with making good decisions, your brothers have decided to make those for you. You will become the ultimate frat bro.

“I will become the ultimate frat bro.”

Let’s start on the outside. A brother works out daily, at least. Strong muscles make for a strong foundation.

As I repeated the words, they became my reality. I had certainly never been a scrawny guy before, but this was something else. My muscles convulsed all at once, then seemed to shred and burst. My muscles ached as pecs, biceps, abs all were pulled out of my body. I sweat under the effort as legs bloated and toned, bloated and toned. My back stretched out and shoulders mounded on muscle.

Good bro. Now, a brother should be cocky, with a cock to match. All the other fraternities should know how superior we are.

‘Shiiit, no other frat could even come close. We threw the best parties, had the hottest girls and… fuck the hottest guys. With a bod like this, just about no body could resist.’ As those thoughts echoed in my head, there was a sharp pain in my balls as they started to swell. My cock snaked down my shorts, throbbing with newfound power and size. A moan escaped my mouth as my cock swelled thick as a beer can. Anyone would beg for a cock like this.

A frat bro with a cock like that just needs to fuck. Your libido keeps your mind so full that you hardly have time to pass your business classes.

My swollen balls began to churn as my cock came to life. As my mind was thrust into a deep sexual haze, any aspirations I had on my pre-law track were pushed out, draining right to my balls and slowly leaking out my cock. At the same time, I felt my roommate begin to shift behind me. I felt his cock press against the small of my back, throbbing as it was thrust into overdrive. He began slowly humping against my back, and I leaned back against that massive cock. I wanted to help my bro however I could. He wrapped his arms around me and slowly started jacking me off. My mind was in pure bliss as I was kicked into overdrive. His arms felt so warm and strong, and he was pushing all my buttons till I was thrusting into his hands.

The frat is a part of you. You live, breath, and sweat the frat. Everyone who meets you will know exactly what you’re about and submit to you, an alpha bro. You put the reek in Greek.

My mind processed for a second until the smell hit me from behind and I understood. My hormones shifted as sweat poured out. It was hard work being a fraternity brother, and everyone would know that. I worked overtime as the smell of straight frat filled my nostrils. The apartment changed in response, filled with leftover beers, used tank tops, and soaked underwear. Anyone who entered would fall into an immediate haze, the smell of bros clouding their mind. My mind was… so… slow. Just… needed… FUCK.

You will keep it simple, keep it stupid.

“I will keep it simple, keep it stupid.”

My head felt like it was filled with fluff. No thoughts, just instinct.

You will listen to your pledge master, follow all he says.

“I will listen to my pledge master, follow all he says.”

It was so much easier to just trust my bros. Whatever they said went.

You will live for and serve your bros, live for and serve the frat.

“I will live for and serve my bros and the frat.”

I would do anything for my bros. Gotta keep ‘em happy.

The frat is life.

“The frat is life.”

My roommate’s cock was still rock hard behind me. His grip was edging me as moaned for release. I could dedicate my life to men like him.

Thank you for your cooperation. There will be no further issues. Now cum.

And I did. Ropes shot across the floor as all the changes were set in stone. I was just another frat dude, struggling through Business classes and fucking through the night.

And with that the video ended. It took a sec for me to regain my senses. I slowly refocused my eyes and… fuck bruh my head is pounding. Musta partied too hard last night. Shit, I was drooling all over myself, lol. I mean, I’m hot but not that hot. And fuck, I made a mess. Bro, what happened? It’s already late, I’ve got to get ready to go out tonight.

I was going to throw on a polo and some shorts when my roommate put a hand on my shoulder. This man must’ve got a double dose of whatever I got. Bro, he was on another fucking level. He pulled me in tight, cupped my ass in his hands, held my chin, and slid his tongue in my mouth. All at once, my world shifted as the fraternity’s motto rang in my head, I will be entirely dedicated to the brotherhood. An aching in my balls told me that I wasn’t going to make it out tonight. I had my frat bro… no, my big bro right here. And he will take care of his little bro. He pulled down his sweatpants and a thick rod popped out from the waistband. He gently guided me to his cock, the true source of his musk. Our scents mingled as my thoughts were consumed by sex. The salty taste of pre coated my tongue as the tip slid down the back of my throat. My mind faded as the smell of the frat filled my nostrils. I was lost in bliss as my bro started pumping, pumping down my throat. Gone was the nerdy roommate I had:

There was nothing left but frat bro.

[crios31]

Chapter 1: The aide

Smut and story building (Defloration, creampie, blowjob, facial)

Lenght 1890 words

You recently finished your university’s year so your parents are visiting you, the three of you are sitting in your living room talking.

“So son, how are your preparations for Korea going?”

“All the paperworks concerning universities and the exchange student program are now done. My flight is booked for the end of the month but I’ll make a stop in Japan to see my friends for two weeks so I’ll arrive in Seoul around mid-July.”

“Good. You should have ample time to take your marks before starting your internship at the holding company over there then.” Says your father while nodding. “It will be a good opportunity for you to learn about the company, after all you’ll be taking it over following your graduation. Now I’ll let your mom explain something to you.”

“So, concerning the person that will be your aide in Korea, we asked her to come today. She should arrive shortly.” Said your mother. 

“That’s good, I was curious about who it could be.”

“For that, do you remember the scholarship program I’m in charge?”

“Yes, you created it following the opening of your first private school. Girls are chosen because they show potential and the program supports them until the end of their studies.” 

“You’re right but there is more to it. I’ll give you a file explaining everything when you’ll be leaving for Japan. What you need to know is, we helped her family in the past, plus she is smart, so we selected her from the program to work for you. We then explained everything to her and she was very curious to know more about you and in the end she accepted our offer. 

“As for more information about her, she is Canadian but was born in South Korea so she has both nationalities, she is a little older than you and recently graduated with a master degree, moreover she is an excellent cook. Finally, the most important information is that this sweet girl will do everything you want. " As she finished her sentence the doorbell rang. “Oh that should be her!”

Your mother asks you to wait as they go to your door to let the guest in . When they return to the room, a beautiful young woman is following them.

Your mother put a hand on her shoulder. “Son, this is Wendy.”

She greets you with a bright smile and cheerful voice.

“Good evening sir, I'm Son Seung-Hwan but I usually go by my English name Wendy. Nice to finally meet you!”

“Nice to meet you too.” you answered smiling

“We'll let you both get to know each other. Have fun kiddos!” says your father as he begins to leave.

“See you soon son.” And with a whisper adds, “Oh I forgot to tell you, she’s still a virgin.”She winks at you before passing the door, your father follows his wife outside while chuckling because he heard her.

You return to your living room where your guest is waiting.

You gazed at Wendy’s body for a moment before beginning to caress her cheek making her blush, “Strip down to your underwear.”

At first confused, she soon complied as she began by taking her T-shirt then her jeans, now you can see her toned body adorned with a black matching set of underwear.

“It’s done, sir.”

She silently waits for your next command as you take a minute admiring her exposed body, making her heart beat faster.“So pretty.” is the last thing she hears as you hold her by the waist and begin to kiss her. As you deepen the kiss she begins to respond by putting her hand around your neck, your tongues playing with each other. Your hands don’t stay idle as they roam her body.

With the kiss end, you turn Wendy's body around, one of your hands unhooking her bra which soon falls on the floor as you start to play with her breasts. Small moans start coming from Wendy’s mouth because of your fondling. Each of her boobs resting in the palm of your hand. you slowly feel the tips hardening, so you decide to give it a pinch to the now hard nipple, eliciting a loud moan from her mouth. “What a beautiful voice.” you whispered.

“Thank you.” she answered, turning her head trying to face you. So you kiss her again.

While you still play with one of her tits, you begin to slowly explore downward with the other. When your hand finally reaches its destination, her panties are completely drenched under your fingers. “Someone is excited.” you pointed out, before kissing her neck as you trace her lower lips over her underwear provoking a shiver from Wendy.

She watches your hand going into her panties. She grabs your wrist and closes her legs when she feels your finger touching the source of her wetness.

You begin to move your fingers along her entrance, teasing her clit each time they go up. Her moans soon become more frequent, so you decide to focus on her clit. You increase your speed, feeling Wendy close to her peak.

“Sir.I'm… I’m coming!” shouted Wendy as her legs grow weak. 

You give her a moment before carrying her to your bedroom where you put her on your bed. She watches you undress while biting her lips, until you finally put down your boxer.

“It’s.. big. ” She said looking at your cock..

Now naked you approach her on the bed grabbing the hem of her panties to remove. With the final obstacle out of the way, you open Wendy’s legs.

“What a cute pussy,” you said before getting into position with the head of your cock pressed against her entrance. You slowly push it in spreading her fold apart making her wince.

“Wait! It’ll never fit!” She shouted as your tip touched her thin membrane. 

“Take a breath and relax as much as possible” You firmly grasp her hips and thrust the rest of your cock until she is full.

“Aah too big! It hurts!” She shouted, her hand gripping the sheet with all her strength.

“Don’t worry it’ll soon feel good. You passed the hardest part,” as you keep a slow pace for some time while making out in order for her to relax. Soon you feel her arms intertwined around your neck and her legs around your waist, as she begins to adjust to your size. “See it’s better now.” you said, smiling at her.

“Yes, it’s still painful but it’s also starting to feel good,” she answered. “You can go faster.”

You then gradually increase your pace as her pussy fully accepts your cock. Wendy gets more and more vocal, so you take one of her nipples in your mouth, sucking on it while teasing her clit with one of your hands.

“Oh.. yeah just continue like that! Yes! Yes! YES!” she shouted as her limbs tightened around you and her walls clenching around your cock showing the start of her orgasm. You stop moving to watch her body shaking. And when the wave of pleasure subsided you began to thrust again. “What? Wait! Cum..  cumming again” she said with her eyes rolling back.

This time you don’t stop as you’re close to your peak, the sound of both yours flesh clapping against each other becoming more frequent,”Fuck! I’m cumming!” And with this last trust you release your load deep inside her, filling her womb. “Damn.. it feels so good.” 

You take a moment to rest before taking your cock out of her freshly deflowered pussy, now empty, both of your fluid begin to drip on the bed sheet. “We’re going to have a lot of fun together in the future,” you said grinning at Wendy who has regained her focus. “Now let’s get cleaned up.”

“Sir? Can I have some help?” 

You lift her, drops of your seed continue to fall from her cunt, leaving a trail behind you as you enter the bathroom. Now in the shower you put her down, Wendy leaning against the glass for support.

Both of you exhale as the water hits your bodies, you begin to wash each other, but you soon feel vigor returning between your legs. “Ready for another round?” You asked before she notices your growing erection.

“I don’t think I will be able to take it in again today sir.”

You paused a little before looking at her lips, “Then suck on it.”

She complies and drops to her knees, slowly grabbing your cock as she hesitantly gives it a few pumps. “Now for starters focus on the head by licking it.” She pulls her tongue out and gives you a tip with growing confidence she explores it covering  it with saliva.

“Good girl, now take it in.” You said softly caressing her head.

She nods, putting your cock in her mouth while looking at you, with upturned eyes stopping a little before a third of the length. “Try to take it deeper.” She starts bobbing her head and takes more of your member each time, but soon you hear a small gag showing her limit. You let her continue the fellation, as you savor the feeling coming from your groin, in particular the feeling of her tongue on the underside of your cock. 

“Good just like that.” you say, patting her head. “I’m close, take it out while you continue to jerk it.” She obeys, your cock leaving her mouth with a pop, placing both her hands around it, moving them up and down with more confidence than when she started.

“Here it comes.”

You ejaculate, sending a big wave of sperm out, painting Wendy’s face white. You watch your work when she decides to taste some of it by licking her lips.

“I’ll need some time to get used to the taste and texture”

You smile at this before both of you resume your shower as Wendy has to clean herself of the slimy liquid on her visage. Exiting the bathroom both of you put your clothes on.

“Are you hungry Wendy?”

“A little.”

“Alright, I’ll make us something. I heard that you are a good cook. I hope that I can experience it soon.” You said with a smile.

“You can count on it.” She answered, smiling back at you.

After having dinner, you let her stay for the night.

—-------------

In the following weeks, you meet again with Wendy, learning more about each other, and having sex with her on multiple occasions, until the day for your departure arrives.

“Sir, are you ready?” asked Wendy from behind you.

“Yes, I was checking that I didn’t forget anything. Let‘s wait outside for my parents.”

You both exit your home with your luggages, and five minutes later your parent’s car arrives. With your dad's help you put everything in the trunk before getting into the car. 

Your father starts the car and soon you are on the highway in the direction of the airport.

[angelnthsnow]

All Too Well

pairing: joe burrow x fem!reader (+18)

summary: enemies since childhood, y/n and joe burrow meet again in LSU, joe to play for the university's team while studying consumer and family financial services and y/n to study mechanical engineering, while also being a cheerleader for the team. what happens when they encounter each other after a fateful night?

word count: 7.1k

warnings: cursing, implied smut, fratboy!joe, asshole!joe, reader skinpicks, angst, use of y/n, author not knowing how an american uni works.

author's note: first published fanfic! i hope you enjoy! keep in mind english isn't my first language, so i'm sorry in advance for any mistakes, also this wasn't proofread bc it's too long and i'm lazy lmaoo.

Sat in the airport, legs over your luggage, you started to question the decision you had made a month ago. It all started in June, when an old colleague from LSU reached out to you via email with a simple, yet — to you — terrifying invitation.

Your colleagues from university were planning a Fourth Of July party in Baton Rouge, the one place in earth you swore to never step foot on again. Well, it's not like the city itself had done anything to you, more like the college life did. Your college years were a part of your life you desperately wanted to forget, partly because going to LSU meant giving up on your dream of studying abroad, and partly, well, let's just say a certain blonde with a degree on consumer and family financial services was to blame.

With an acute voice echoing through the airport gates, you sighed, getting up to get on the plane.

As the aircraft was in the air, you get your playlist blasting on the headphones and not long after that, you drift off to sleep.

You wake up when there's 20 minutes left to land on the city, and as you get your phone to send a message to your friend, Emily, the device decides to make this trip a little harder than it should have ever been. On that bright screen, on a small box with "Years ago on this week.." written over it, was the picture.

It was night when you woke up, tangled on the white strawberry sheets of your own dorm bed. Opening your eyes quietly, you saw the one man that had put you on that position earlier. Sat with his back to you, there was Joe. He had only his sweatpants on, and you could see the reddish marks, the ones caused by you, were starting to fade on his skin. His hair was messy and he breathed slowly, seeming oddly calm giving what had just happened.

Joe and you had been, well.. enemies? since you could remember. It all started in school, you had a dream of becoming a world famous dancer, a cheerleader in college, and Joe just thought it was stupid, all of it. He was quite shy, but you knew he had a dream as well. Joe wanted to be a football star, but nobody knew that. He'd just let it slide once when you two were fighting on the school's playground. When you two got to the age in which people go to university, you thought you had finally seen the last of him. How foolish, truly. After two years of studying engineering at Louisiana State University and being in the cheerleading team, there he was, ready to make your life miserable for another few years.

That was, of course, until now. You'd never imagine you see him like this; half naked, messy hair and your cat on his lap as he caressed her head, whispering in a baby voice to her as she purred softly.

You smiled, because why wouldn't you? Shifting quietly on your bed, as if he was a scaredy animal you could scare away with any abrupt movements, you get your phone, taking a picture of him. It was dark, blurred, but you didn't mind, you could tell it was Joe, his big silhouette right in the center of the photograph. In your head, you knew you wouldn't need to keep this blurry memento, you were certain the amount of opportunities to take pictures of him now were infinite, or so you thought, drifting to sleep again.

The pilot's voice pulls you out of your little daydream, announcing the plane had arrived in Louisiana.

"I shouldn't have come." You chant in your head as you exit the plane, heading over to the landing area to wait for Emily.

You and Emily had met in LSU, and became inseparable since then. She was your roommate and, despite being highly introverted, you managed to develop your longest friendship ever with her.

When Anna, the colleague that invited you to the party, emailed you, Emily was the first person to text you, begging you to come and enjoy a night with the people you hadn't seen in so long. She also missed you a lot since both of you hadn't seen each other much after college, of course, you somehow managed to see each other every year and talk almost everyday, but it wasn't as close as you wished.

Emily lived in Louisiana with her husband, Dave, who had also gone to LSU with you, and of all the times you had seen each other, she had gone to your home, so you technically kind of owed this to her.

Waving in a frantic manner, there she was. Slightly different from last time, but still your best friend. You smile, walking towards her.

"I'm so glad you're here!" she says once she gets a hold of you, hugging you as if you could run away at any moment. You kind of wished you could, but she made everything better. She had that superpower.

"I'm glad I could come, Ems. I've missed you so much." You smile, looking at her as she helps you with your heavy bags.

The two of you start walking towards the exit to her car, catching up after a long time. Emily put you to date on what every single old colleague was up to now, and you laughed at the amount of gossip she was able to retain.

"Where's Dave?" You furrow your brows, just realizing someone was missing.

Emily opens the trunk and you help her put your bags on it. Panting after carrying so much weight, she replies "Home. He was working so he couldn't come, but he's super excited to see you." as you two get into the vehicle.

And with that, the engine starts and soon you're on the highway, on the way to her house.

The week in Emily and David's house had passed very quickly, and you throughly regretted ever wishing you hadn't came. She had shown you every bit of the city, and things had changed a lot. Now, you were in their guest room, getting ready to the reason that had you coming all the way from New York to Louisiana.

It was fourth of July, and you had heard fireworks all day around the neighborhood, even stopping to watch them for a bit before going for a shower.

"They're pretty, aren't they?" Emily said through the kitchen window as she saw you looking up outside.

"Very much." You turned around, smiling at her.

"Anna told me they're having fireworks tonight, I think you'll like it."

You got a bit excited, you've always loved fireworks, they were like drawings in the biggest canvas you could ever get, the sky.

"Looking forward to it!" You said, going up the stairs to get ready.

Looking in the mirror, you sigh. You wore an USA flag bodysuit and jean shorts. This whole patriotism seemed stupid, but Emily dragged you into it, alleging you were allergic to fun. Nonetheless, you looked good.

"Y/N! Let's go, we're gonna be late!"

Breathing in deeply, you close your eyes and stare at yourself one last time. You knew Joe would probably attend the party, he loved parties, and still, you came. You couldn't give up now, you couldn't get this stupid thing get to you. He probably doesn't even remembers everything that happened that day.

You shake your head, moving those thoughts away as you go downstairs, seeing Emily and Dave ready sitting on the couch.

"You look amazing! I told you you'd rock this fit." she gets up, hugging you.

"You too, Ems." you laugh, fixing your hair after she lets you go. "Shall we?"

"After you, Miss United States!" David jokes, signaling for you to get out of the house first. You laugh, rolling your eyes.

The three of you get in the car, and the drive to the party is filled with singing and more of Emily informing you of your colleague's current lives.

When Dave finally pulls over to the party, you can already hear the loud music in the car. Looking out the window, you see the last thing you'd expect to see today: Joe's parents house.

When Robin and Jim were away, Joe would always throw parties in his house instead of in the frat house. It made sense, giving the fact his house was a bit bigger. Snapping back to reality, you froze, but still had hopes of not seeing him tonight, after all, the amount of people that would come to the party was huge.

Entering the house, you were struck by fairy lights hanging on the roof, from a wall to another, and USA flags all over the house. There was a big wood table in a corner with punch and other drinks, but other than that, the place looked pretty much the same. It was weird coming back after all these years, but it still had a familiar air to it.

After almost 50 minutes, Emily was already drunk and fooling around somewhere with her fiancé. You were finally alone, and by now you had roamed the entire house, gladly not meeting Joe not even once. You thought about leaving, but not before going to your favorite spot in the house, the only one you hadn't explored today yet.

Joe's house had a small attic, which you adored. When he threw parties in high school and you couldn't get away from your friend's pleas to come, this was the place you found yourself in. So, after 6 years, there were you again. On that narrow wooden space that had a somewhat medium window with a view to the back of the house, where the party was most wild. You were surprised to see they hadn't moved a thing, it felt like you had time-traveled to your school years.

In front of the window, there was an old blue armchair, the one you would sometimes sleep on waiting for Emily and the others to want to go home. The rest of the attic was filled with boxes, some with trophies and pictures of Joe, with his family, his team, and his coach.

You sat on the armchair, arms hugging your knees as you looked at the window, the music that once made your head hurt because of the volume was long gone, sounding now like white noise.

Entering the football team frat house, you could see neon lights and hear music blasting through the speakers. Soon enough, all the other cheerleaders and Emily were dancing and having fun, after all the team had won the game, there was no reason not to celebrate. Except for you, because a win for LSU immediately meant running into Joe Burrow, or seeing his face all over the university for a week or so.

Sitting on a couch in the living room, you had a privileged view to the enormous door that swung open, revealing a sweaty but smiley Joe. He walks in as he normally does, exhaling an air of cockiness around him. He has a bottle of beer in hand, and already looks drunk as he laughs to his teammates. After being showered in praises and congratulations, he's free to walk a bit further, which is when he sees you. His eyes immediately glance at your jersey, and you immediately regret having done what you did.

Earlier that day, before you left for the party, it started to snow, and you realized you hadn't brought a single coat to the game. The girls were about to leave and they didn't want any delays, so you looked around for anything that could cover your body and protect you from freezing.

The only thing you could find was an old LSU football team jersey with the name "BURROW" stitched on the back. You sighed, but tried to confort yourself by thinking nobody would see it, after all, the lights at the party were pretty low.

All of it cumulated to this moment. This disgusting look he gives you as he looks down, glaring at his jersey. "What the hell are you wearing?”

Of course he would recognize it, it was his, after all. You cursed yourself mentally in all the languages you know, and prayed that Emily would come to you out of the blue to take you home. She didn't.

"Please, don't start, Joseph." You say, trying to ignore him. "I was cold and this was the only thing I could find."

“Yeah, right. Just say you were trying to piss me off, like always.” he scowls.

"Not everything is about you, QB." You get up, furrowing your brows at the audacity, annoyance dripping in your voice.

“Everything is most definitely not about you either, cheerleader.” he scoffs, and his teammates laugh. “You're still not even good at that.”

"And you're still not even good at your little games, idiot." I scoff. "Let me remind you, I'm the one going to the national competition while you're still playing football in college."

This time, his friends mutter a low "oooh".

He's stunned for a moment, then he scowls and gets closer to your face. “Watch your mouth. This is my last season here anyway, then i’m going straight to the NFL and everyone's gonna know my name, who knows what you’ll be doing.”

You just still didn't know he actually meant it.

"The NFL?" You laugh, hands on your chest. "You know, Joey.." You say, calling him by the nickname his friends had given him, in an attempt to piss him off. "To be on the NFL, you gotta be one of the greats." You stare at him, getting closer. "Something you.. are not."

He scowls, and his friends are surprised, the nickname really got to him. Before you can get another word in, he grabs you and pulls you close, his voice is low and cold. “Who the fuck are you calling Joey? You don’t get on the nickname level with me, Y/N."

Your squirm under his touch, trying to get off of him. A bit of fear seems to be creeping up in your eyes, and you try your best to not let it show.

"Don't fucking touch me!" You slap him, getting some inches away and staring at him in awe.

He recoils a bit, then glares. His lips are trembling, and you’ve never seen him angry like this, even his breath is shaky. He doesn't look like the Joe you once fed turtles in kindergarten with. He clenches his fist and looks around, he’s got the attention of everyone at the party “Are you seriously gonna slap the quarterback?”

"Fuck you! You're a horrible person that thinks that because you're a star you can do whatever the fuck you want, well, breaking news, YOU CAN'T." You scoff, angrier than ever, while removing the jersey off of you, throwing it at him, eyes swelling with tears.

"You're a fucking parasite, a manwhore who thinks everything's about you. I hope you never get to the NFL." This time it comes out lower, like a personal threat. You desperately crave to hurt him in a way he won't be able to laugh at or make jokes. Turning around, you walk out of the house, everything seemed to suffocate you.

He's stunned, no ones ever talked to him like that, specially you, the one person he was so used to getting shit from. He just stares at your back, the BURROW that was once hidden by your messy hair now gone, in his shaky hands. A range of emotions go through him. He's mad, but then there’s a sadness, he feels unwanted, as if the only reason people talk to him is because he is the quarterback. He doesn’t want you to leave like this, but he doesn’t know what to say, so he just yells “Where are you even gonna go?!”

"Somewhere you're not!" You scream, not even bothering to turn around to face it, crossing the door and walking through the garden in front of the house.

At this point, the party had gone back to what it once was, a loud, fun mess.

He sighs, then chases after you. When he catches up, he grabs your arm and forces you to turn around to face him. “Where the hell do you think you're going? You're not safe, there's a bunch of drunkards out there today."

"Like you give a fuck." You shrug, shaking your arm to get away from his grip. You turn around and start walking, the cold getting to you again. The snow fell mercilessly and all you had was the thin sweater that covered your cheerleading clothes.

He sighs, then realizes you’ll freeze outside. He puts his arm around you and pulls you in. You're so incredibly small compared to him you can feel his heart beating fast and his muscles tense from anger. “I do care. Just… come back inside, you're gonna freeze out here."

"Leave me alone! I fucking hate you!" The tears start falling as you punch his chest in a frantic way. It didn't hurt him, of course, but you didn't know that.

He scowls when you do so, gritting his teeth, then just watches you cry. He sighs and pulls you in tight, his body heats yours up. He rocks you like a baby, and whispers “Let me explain. I didn't meant for things to be like this.”

"Like what? Like living hell?" You away from his embrace, but part of you wishes you hadn't. Joe was so big and warm you didn't even needed a coat. "You hate me. Why are you even doing this?" you yell, the loud blasting music from the party muffling your screams. "Go back to your stupid party with your friends and your girls. I'm going home."

He grabs your arms and makes you turn to him. “I don’t.. hate you. I just get mad and take it out on you. I know that’s not right, i’m trying to fix it. Let me take you home.”

"Oh please." You scoff, tears still falling. "No need. I'll walk." You say, shivering due to the cold.

He sighs again. “You're not going home alone, it's not safe. I don’t care if you hate my guts, i’m not letting you walk alone.”

Joe's words and actions pierce you like a bullet. Never, in a million years, you had imagined you'd hear him talk to you like this. Of course, it was still rude, but there was a sweetness to it. You say nothing, as you couldn't bring yourself to. As he puts the jersey you once threw in his face back on your shoulders, the shivering reduces a bit, and your lips stop trembling, their reddish color that was once white from the cold, reappearing. His big hands stroking your back felt so gentle, and helped you get rid of the cold as he gently and quietly led you to his car. He opens the door to the passenger seat and waits for you to get in. You do so, surprisingly, and he closes it, turning around to get into the driver's seat.

He climbs in the drivers seat and starts the engine. The warm air that comes out of the vents warming you up as he looks over at you. You watch him drive, he seems so focused, and when he speaks, it’s in a quiet voice “I'll walk you to your door, then you should probably take a hot shower to warm up, your gonna get sick like this.”

"There's no need. I'll survive." you say, pulling the jersey closer and breathing in the warmth.

“I'm not gonna risk you getting sick just because you decided to be stubborn now.” You can’t help but notice how gentle his voice is, a nice contrast to how cold he seemed towards you at the party.

"Fine." You whisper, and after a few moments in silence, he finally pulls up to the dorms. You open the door of the car and get out, the cold getting to you again. You sigh.

Joe does the same and the two of you walk in silence towards the entrance of the building. Once you reach the door, you turn around, "You've done enough, Burrow. I mean it. Go back to your party, you have a win to celebrate." You say, grabbing your keys and unlocking the door.

“I wanna see you safe in your house before i go, I feel responsible for you getting cold out here.” he doesn’t want you to think he doesn’t care about you, when it’s clear from the way he’s acting he only thinks of you and your safety right now.

You nod, his gentle words feeling like daggers in your heart, making you almost regret the way went a few rounds with him earlier.

Getting into your aparment, you take off your shoes, holding the door for him to do the same, and when he does, you lock it again, before making your way to the small kitchen.

"Can I get you anything? Water, tea..?" You ask, trying to be a good host. You and Emily never expected no one to come to the apartment, so there was never many food or drink options.

He follows you to the kitchen, shrugs and looks around. The apartment is not very big, but it’s homely. From the kitchen, you can see the entire living room, including the door, and then there's a small hallway that leads to the rooms and bathroom.

He looks at you when you offer him something and smiles, it breaks his scowl, it looks good on him. He looks at you for a moment, then says “Can i get a glass of water?”

You nod and get on your tip toes to open the cabinet, getting a glass and then filling it with water, handing it to Joe as you take a seat on one of the stools in front of the kitchen's island.

He takes the glass and drinks from it, still holding on to his scowl, but it slowly drops off as he begins to relax. He sits down beside you, close enough that his knees are touching yours “Your apartment is so different from mine.”

You sigh, making small talk with him was the last thing on your list for today, but still, you gave it a shot.

"How so..?" You say, not even bothering to look at him. Instead, the cup of water you had poured to yourself in front of you was the one getting all of the attention. The fact that the only person in the entire campus that hated you was the one to bring you home was already embarrassing enough, so you were still to wrap your mind around the fact he was still here.

He watches you and looks around the kitchen, not sure how to explain it to you. For a few moments he just looks at you, trying to gather his thoughts. “I don’t know how to explain it, it’s just different from anything i’m used to.”

"Calling me poor now, are we, Burrow?" You shrug, letting a small laugh fall from your lips.

He glares, then realizes you were joking and laughs a little bit. You can notice he still smiles when he looks at you, which is surprising considering how he always scowled at you. “I'd never call you poor, especially not after seeing your outfit tonight.” he looks you up and down.

"Mr. Joseph Burrow's a fashionista?" You chuckle, this wasn't something you'd ever expect from him. There wasn't any monograms or brand names on the sweater you wore, but if you were a someone into good clothing, you'd recognize it.

He laughs and shakes his head, he can’t help but notice your curves and he looks down, trying not to stare. “I wouldn’t consider myself a fashion guy, i just know something looks nice when i see it.. and your outfit looks very nice on you."

"Yeah, sure.." You nod, standing up and grabbing both of the glasses. You take them to the sink, putting your hair up in a bun and washing them. "I'm okay now, Burrow, really. I don't know why you did what you did tonight, but thank you." The thank you comes out like a whisper, but you pray he does notice. "Come back to your party, enjoy your teammates and your girls. There's still time."

He shifts in his seat and watches you as you wash the glass, his mind is conflicted. Part of him wants to follow his teammates back to the party, the other part wants to stay with you, see how long the small talk can go before it turns into a fight again. His eyes watch you as his breathing starts to pick up a bit. When you thank him, he realizes you don’t want to talk about the fight or why he did what he did at all.

He shakes his head and stands up. “I guess I better get going then."

"Yeah.. of course." You flash him a shy smile, and the awkward silence sets in again.

He notices your smile and smiles back, not knowing how to express himself right now, although he doesn’t know how to leave either. He just awkwardly stands there, staring at you, his eyes are locked on yours, he can’t help but notice how beautiful they are. The two of you lost in your own thoughts, the silence filled with tension. Then he speaks “Can i ask something before I go?”

"Yes."

“Why'd you wear that jersey? You knew it would piss me off, so why’d you wear it?”

You sigh, you had already explained that, but Joe seemed so drunk you thought maybe he had forgotten. "I told you, I was cold and I had forgotten my hoodie." you point to the couch, where the green hoodie rested on. "I knew it would piss you off, and trust me when I say I wasn't going for that today, but it happened. I'm sorry for it, you can have it back now." You say, taking the jersey off for the second time that night, except this time you don't throw it on his face. Instead, you just gently hand it to him, like a peace offering.

He takes it, looking down at it in his hands, then he looks back up at you. He sighs and is suddenly filled with mixed feelings, anger, sadness, his emotions feel overwhelming. He doesn’t want to yell and argue with you again, but he also doesn’t want to leave. He can’t stop looking at you and your eyes, he can’t help but love how pretty they are. "Can I please keep this? Please..?" he whispers.

"Why are you asking me that? It's yours, it has your name on it." You say matter-of-factly, fidgeting with your hands, something you do when you're nervous.

You can tell he’s trying really hard not to smile at you, his voice is soft when he says “Yeah… but it’s got your sweat on it… your smell… I want something to remind me of you… even though, you know… we always seem to get each other mad.”

You don't understand, after all, you see each other every single day. The best "something to remind me of you" he could ever ask for was standing right in front of him everyday.

You furrow your eyebrows. Years of fighting, screaming and pissing each other off leading to this moment was something you couldn't wrap your mind around. "Do I need to remind you we hate each other? Until this morning, you'd get me suspended from LSU if you could."

He laughs, and you’ve never seen him in such a vulnerable and soft state. "We both know I don’t wanna get you suspended from LSU, I mean, come on.. just look at you.” he stares at you, you see his eyes roaming your body like he always does, but there’s a different look about them. "You deserve this scholarship more than I do, you've always have."

"Yeah.." You scoff, not believing a word, looking at the jersey on his hands and then at his eyes. His big, blue eyes that you got lost in countless times before.

He smiles at you, realizing the snarkiness he just heard. He doesn’t mind the teasing, in fact, he kinda likes it. He stares at you for a minute, then he looks back down at the jersey “I like how it fits tight on you.” he says without realizing it.

"Tight? You're big as hell, it looks huge on me." You laugh, remembering how the jersey looked on you when you put it on earlier today.

He laughs silently to himself, a big smirk appears on his face. He looks at your body, then smiles. “You're just too small, but I do like how it fits on you."

You feel goosebumps throughout your entire body and your cheeks heat up. You curse yourself mentally for letting it all show so easily.

He's still staring at you, but doesn’t realize just how much he’s making you blush. He continues to speak in a low voice "I can see your belly button when you dance for us on the field.." He pauses, but decides to go on, and it's like you can hear the engines turning in his head. "I can see your bra strap when you go so high in the sky I feel my hands covered in cold sweat in fear that you'll fall and I won't be there to catch you. I can see your collarbones when you get so close to me when we're fighting that I wish I would just lean in and shut you the fuck up. I can see how you blush when I sweep you off your feet and leave you speechless, like i'm doing now." He steps closer. "I can see all of you. Matter of fact, Y/N, I think you're all I have ever wanted to see." He states, like it's a fact, like he has always known that. You feel your eyes starting to water and you feel stupid. "Every inch of you looks amazing in that jersey, it fits you like nothing else i’ve ever seen."

You sigh, it's almost like you can feel your skin being touched by him just by the way he’s looking at you. You feel like a forest fire, and his voice tone doesn't help. "Stop.."

His voice is so low when he talks, you want him to keep speaking. You want to hear his voice go on and on, to get you worked up, but also to lull you into the most peaceful sleep you've had in years. He keeps staring at you as he speaks “Just look at your shoulders, the fabric wraps all around them so perfectly, they’re such beautiful curves, just like the rest of you. Just look at you.. Jesus." He sighs.

You squirm under his gaze, but in a split second you're reminded of everything that happened before this moment. Before being here, in your small dorm, talking to the man you earlier thought to be the meanest person you knew. "I won't fall for it. I'm not the girls you get after winning games."

He chuckles and looks away, clearing this throat before going on "Those girls are just something to make me feel good, they don’t even mean anything to me. But you.. even when you make me angry, I want nothing but to feel you in my arms. You make me feel so good, even when you piss me off.”

"You don't mean that." You mutter, trying to stay calm. You pick the skin on your arms while staring at him.

His eyes shift back to yours when you speak, he sighs and you can tell for a minute he’s conflicted on what to say. "I know you don’t believe I mean all those words, but honestly, I mean every word. You are the only girl who's ever made me feel something, even if we’re arguing, that means we at least have some emotion we want to put towards each other. I'd rather have you making me mad than have someone making me feel nothing at all."

A single tear slides down your cheek. "You're drunk, that's what it is. You're drunk and this.." You point to yourself, and then to him, "..must be a prank."

“I know that’s all we’ve known for years, but maybe the reason you make me so mad is because I have feelings for you. You are the only girl I have ever wanted to talk to like this. You're the only girl that makes me feel this way. I never want to stop talking to you, I just want to tell you how beautiful you are, even when you make me mad, or when you push me so far it makes me want to push you towards the wall and kiss you."

You stare at him like everything you've ever known has finally made sense. A few more tears drip from your eyes and you sigh. "You promise?" it comes out in a whisper.

He smiles and you can tell it's not a fake drunk smile. This is the smile he flashes at someone when he's letting down his guard and being completely honest and vulnerable. "I promise. I don't want anyone else, I want you. I wanna be the guy who makes you happy like no one else could. I want you to be there when I get into the NFL and I want to be able to look for you on every game, waving at you when I see you're wearing my jersey because you finally want to, because it means something."

You look up, melting over his voice, your eyes meeting his like never before. His eye color seemed different now, a more vivid blue. His eyes seemed more relaxed, a nice contrast to the ones full of rage that always came with a furrowed brow. "I want you, too." You whisper.

He smiles, a real and sweet smile. This time when his eyes roam your body, you feel like he isn't looking at you in a nasty way like always, he's just looking at you because he thinks he's the luckiest boy in the world.

You smile, "Do I need to call you some names to have you kissing me now?" It makes him laugh, and your eyes lock on his. There isn't any words, just feelings, and you can see it in him when the realization sets in that you want him too.

You get on your tip toes as Joe pulls you towards him, your lips finally touching each other. Your belly feels as if you just rode a rollercoaster, as if the LSU football team had won, as if there was fireworks inside of you like there's in the sky on the fourth of July. But instead it was all him, the same boy that you once hated so much, doing all of this to you without even trying.

Immersed in your thoughts, you didn't notice when someone opened the door and came in, what gave it away was the smell, and you wondered if it would ever change.

"Joseph..?" you froze, again, but still managed to turn around on the armchair, feet now touching the ground.

His eyes meet yours for the first time in.. well, years, since that fateful night. He looked.. the same. Although his hair was shorter now and he looked bigger than ever, his face was the same. The same mesmerizing ocean blue eyes, pointy nose, and rosy cheeks, which you always found funny, because it looked like he had blush on. He wore a threadbare white shirt, shorts, and a tennis shoe, but they weren't the same as years ago, and you thought to yourself how an outfit of his now would cost probably more than your monthly earnings. He also wore a USA flag headband, which you had seen earlier laying on the wood table for everyone to get one. You thought it looked.. funny.

"Y/N." He nods. It felt like forever since your name had left his lips for the last time.

"Sorry, I-" You start, getting up from the chair as you wrote a full apology in your head for being in a private part of his home. "I thought nobody would need the room, I'll leave now."

"Nobody does." He takes a sip of his drink, his hands looking huge as he holds the red cup. "Dave told me you came with him and Emily, had to see it for myself."

He says, getting closer and finally leaning onto the window, arms resting just above it. Another sip, and you find yourself sitting again.

"How'd you know I was here?" You furrow your eyebrows, not understanding a thing. His eyes don't wander from the view. You're stiff, and you think you've probably never felt so nervous.

"You always are."

If you thought your eyebrows couldn't furrow any more, you were wrong. As soon as the words fell from his lips, you were in complete shock. Does that mean he knew that, all this time, you spent the parties in his attic, alone, dying to go home? That he knew you slept here, not once, not twice, but several times before?

"What?" Is all you manage to say, embarrassment taking over you.

"I mean, when I threw parties in high school you were always here. I know you don't like parties but you would always come because of Emily, and somehow your nights always ended here."

Your eyes widened, and you swore that if your mom could see you now, she would say something along the lines of You look like you've seen a ghost.

You kind of felt like you had.

"I'm surprised you like the place, it's kinda small." He finally shifts, taking his arms off the window and setting his now empty cup on the small wood piece that rested under the window. You blush, after all this time.

When you woke up in the morning, Joe was no longer there. You didn't panic, just thought of it as typical him. Getting up from the bed, you saw Emily on her chair, watching something on her computer.

"Morning, sleeping beauty." she says as she hears you yawn.

"Morning, Ems." You smile, sitting up straight. "D'you have a good night?"

"Obviously, duh. Dave's a gentleman." she states, bragging, and you laugh. "He also told me you and Joe left together last night.. what was that about?"

You sigh, flashes from the night before coming back to haunt you. "We.. uh.." you start, but words can't really explain what went down in this apartment yesterday. "We kissed, and had sex.. and, uh.. he might've said he likes me.." you whisper, like it was a crime.

"WHAT?!" Emily jumps from the chair, startled. "Y/N.. Oh my God.." she gets closer to you, getting on her knees in front of you. "How was that? And, most importantly, how's that gonna work now?" she states, as if something had changed overnight.

"What do you mean?" you furrow your eyebrows, confused.

"Well, you know he's been drafted to the NFL, don't you?" she says as if it was something everyone knew, incluiding you.

You felt your heart sink.

So it was a prank, after all. The worst one he could ever pull on you.

He left, and he wasn't coming back.

You knew he meant every word he had said last night, but he also had really left. Joe had confessed his love to you the night before just to leave in the morning, leaving you mercilessly stranded.

You don't say anything, because how could you find the words to? Emily immediately understands and hugs you, but the only embrace you could possibly want at the time was miles away now.

You were surprised at his ability to pretend like nothing had happened, like the last few years hadn't been torture to you, wondering where did it go wrong. Years of blaming yourself, of recalling the night over and over and-

"No need to be ashamed, Y/N." he chuckles, the sound of it filling the quiet room.

"I'm not ashamed." you lie. Letting him see through you was the last thing you needed today. "Just thought nobody knew."

"Well, if it helps, I'm the only one who does." he finally sits on the ground, back glued to the wall where the window was. A beat, and then he was back with the personal questionnaire. "How are you?"

"I should be the one asking that question. Huge team, getting all the girls, abnormal paycheck.. Superbowl." your words dripping with disgust as you stare out the window, hoping for something, anything, anyone, a divine intervention to get you out of there.

"I don't really get that many girls," he says as he stares at you. One of the things about him that bothered you so much was his courage. You could never, ever, not a million years, bring yourself to stare at him the way he'd do to you. It was intimidating, raw, and worst of all, familiar. He'd always do this when the two of you fought in high school, that's how he'd always win the arguments, not by words, by having the courage to look you in the face and leaving you feeling vulnerable and naked under his gaze. That's also the same way he stared at you that night, after saying all those nice words that made you melt under his touch.

"Mhm.." You nod, not knowing what to say.

"Aren't you going to answer me?" he questions, again.

"I'm fine, finishing my doctorate now."

You don't know why you told him that, but it felt right.

He lets out a breath, "Fuck, Y/N.. That's huge." he congratulates you, and although he couldn't see it due to the poor lighting, it makes you blush. You had never seen it as that big of a deal, it was just the thirst for knowledge you always had, but it was nice knowing someone Joe thought about it as something nice.

"Thank you"

"Thank you coming today," he finally says, awkwardly, as he gets up, grabbing his cup as he does so. "tell your folks I said hi."

"Will do."

He opens the door and gets lost in the crowd, leaving quietly and sneakily like he did that night, and you let out a breath you didn't even realize you were holding.

[mirohlayo]

HATE YOU LOVINGLY | LN4 (pt1)

( you hate him just as he hates you. but maybe it's just his way to show he fell hard for you. )

warning : angst, jealousy, fluff

note : light enemies to lovers because it's literally my favorite trope 🤭 also this first part is like the whole context, next part will be more interesting

word count : 3.7k

↳ part 2

!! english is not my first language !!

lando doesn't really know when he first started to hate you. he thinks it just happened like that, all of a sudden. the truth is that when he first laid eyes on you, he never intended to detest you. this can be seen as a complicated relationship. and actually it is.

he hates you as much as you hate him. he can't stand seeing you. he can't stand being near you. because he knows how much he get annoyed by just being in the same room as you. he knows how hard it is to not yell and curse at you. he hates you badly. but maybe it is just a way to bury his true feelings regarding you ?

being oscar's best friend is one your biggest proud. not in the way of you being a total jerk and prove to everyone your best friend is a famous f1 driver and take advantage of it for you and self seeking. but in the way of you being able to have such an amazing and fulfilling friend, whom you support everyday for his achievements in f1.

your relationship with oscar is like siblings. you have the same age as him but definitely the same vibe and energy. you support him as well as he supports you. you bring each other up and always look out for both of you. it's genuinely a healthy relationship, no toxic behaviors and no toxic feelings.

you know each other for a long time now, since kindergarten. your parents are good friends and you had spent your childhood mostly with him, stuck to his side. you two went through different friends groups but always ended up together at the end. you basically grew up with oscar, like real siblings. until your paths force you to part ways.

his goal to be an f1 driver tear oscar from you. fate is sometimes painful. he started from an early age karting so you two had barely time to see each other. but yet you remained close. you always tried to attend his kart racing, always cheering him up. you were definitely his number one fan and he was so thankful towards you. when he became a f2 and f3 driver you still tried to attend the races but studies called you back.

you decided to pursue your studies to achieve your dream and especially your dream career : being a f1 presenter. seeing oscar drives and feeling the atmosphere of the sport of formula filled you with wonder and then it becomes an evidence. you were made for this job. so you put all your efforts and all your sleepless nights into your classes, into your essays. and the work finally paid off.

you're finally going to be a f1 presenter for this new season.

no need to say how much you are happy, finally graduated from university. and plus you will be able to get the job you so desperately wanted. first thing is to tell oscar the good news. you know how proud and happy he'll be, you always bothered him about this degree during the rare f1 races you could attend, university took up a lot of your time and you could very rarely come and support your best friend.

but he is understanding and he's by far the most supportive person, he always says you'll achieve your dream. and now that it became true, you didn't wait a second to tell him you got the job of your dream. so you decided to attend the suzuka race.

-

the drivers parade just ended and oscar is making his way back to the garage, where you are waiting for him. you stand here, scrolling through your phone while peeking out to make sure you don't miss him. your hear footsteps getting closer to the garage and a voice you recognize well. you lift your head up and your look fall on oscar's teammate. you glance at him, already feeling a little bit annoyed by just seeing his face. you try to ignore him and go back to your phone.

lando knows you're here. he also knows you glared at him too. well he spotted you as soon as you had entered the garage. and also him can already feel a sour sensation, he's fed up with you.

he first laid eyes on you some months ago, actually during the second race of the year. he had never seen you before because of course you're oscar's best friend and you had no one to support in f1 in previous years. but oscar being lando's new teammate, you obviously had to show up for him.

he'd be lying if he said he didn't find you unsettling. well to make it clear he found you extremely attractive. you were the most beautiful woman he has ever seen in his whole life, and who knows how much he had met lots of pretty girls. but they didn't even rival you and your beauty a little. no, he knew you were different from them.

first he was just watching you from afar, stealing glances at you whenever you would show up around the paddock. you were mostly talking and laughing with oscar, so he often caught you smiling and he found that adorable. you intrigued him a lot. never ever he wanted so bad to talk to a girl before. but he didn't, he just gazed at you.

and it seemed like you were constantly with oscar. always. always with him. so he had never gotten a chance to talk to you. but soon this curiosity turned into something else. something bad.

he suddenly started to hate you. him either doesn't really know it started or what are truly the reasons. he's just sure you became the most annoying person ever to be. it all started when he noticed you never congratulated him for his performances or podiums. but always oscar.

when oscar would ends up on the podium, or do a great job in qualifying, you were always there to support him and jump into his arms, hugging him so close. you would always tell him how proud you are, how amazing he did and that he's pure talent. and the mclaren members would definitely agree with you. but when it comes to lando, there's no reaction from you.

you never tell him congrats or that he did a good job, never. you never show him a hint of support. first he didn't really care, though seeing you only be proud of oscar and not also him while he did the same good job as his teammate if not better, it was kind of disrespectful to him. but he also knew that he didn't talk to you, you didn't know him and you are not close, of course you won't congratulate lando the same as you do with oscar.

but still, the driver thought just showing some respect and support for him and not just only for oscar could be appropriate and appreciated. the rest of the team always cheered up for lando, and surprisingly even the loved ones of oscar would congratulate him. except you. you were the only one amongst oscar's friends who don't seem to care about the other driver.

and lando hates that. fucking hate that. he is also a driver of the team, he's also doing a great job, so why would oscar be the only one to receive your support ? he doesn't understand, even if you two are not close it's important to not neglect him and to actually care as much for him as for your best friend. it looks like you ignore him. oscar is not the only mclaren driver to win and earn points. lando exists too.

he hates the fact that you act like he doesn't exist.

but from your point of view, it's completely different. of course you care about lando. you won't lie, maybe you care about him more than you care about your best friend. how much you want to show him all your respect and support, how much you also want to hug him after his every podiums. but you don't, because you're just scared. you are being a coward.

it's so stupid. yet you can't fix it. you're also so bad attracted to lando. like he's consuming your every thoughts since you first caught a glimpse of him at jeddah race. his presence, his way to be, his sassy personality, his smooth driving style. you're captivated by him just as he is with you. you so want to talk to him, to finally have the guts to say some words to him.

but you think it'll be weird. and that he'll think you're a crazy fangirl or whatever. because if you suddenly start to hug him overnight to show him how amazing he did then he'll be uncomfortable. that's what you think. when all he wanted was you to actually do it. wrap your arms around him and he's already all yours.

you can't help it, you don't want to make you a fool out of yourself, you don't want to push out things. you're too scared because after all he's the teammate of your best friend, you are nothing for him. you can't be something for him. he must have others priorities, others people and girls he care about. you can't behave like he's one of your closest friend and expect him to act positively with you.

and that's why you're clumsy around him. plus with your shyness it's difficult to not look like ridiculous in front of him.

lando can't barely stand the fact you only see oscar in the team, so when you started acting clumsy around him it was the last straw. he started seeing red, oh how annoyed he was.

once you were walking in the paddock to join lily, the girlfriend of oscar. she was in the garage so you just walked towards her. but as your turned on a corner you accidentally bumped into lando. you lifted up your head, and your crossed his eyes. he didn't look bothered, though his look was somehow intense staring at you like that.

embarrassment took over you and you quickly murmured a soft "sorry" barely audible. which lando didn't hear of course. you were too shy and embarrassed to speak louder, and you run away without giving him a look. he watched you disappear, and the indescribable feeling that he felt at that moment really hurt him.

so you're like that ? you're that disrespectful towards him ? first not a hint of congratulation and then being rude ? are you serious now ? he scoffed and rolled his eyes. such bad behaviors.

or that one time when you called him stupid because he blocked oscar's car and you didn't expect him to hear you. but he did. he was about to confront you and was ready to argue with you but he calmly walked away. it was a bad idea. but he really felt disgusted and kind of disappointed. you really had the guts to call him like that when you can't even manage to greet him ?

you can't even look him in the eyes, and every times he's talking it seems like you don't listen to him, sometimes interrupting him. when you would ignore him the whole race. and all of that. all of that stuff was making him go insane.

he's so fucking fed up. like he's so annoyed to the point he hopes you won't show up to the races, even though you're already rarely present. but when you're not here around the paddock he knows it'll be a good week end. no need to worry. because he knows he won't see your face, he knows he won't have to handle you.

he hates you to the point he hopes you'll stop being friend with oscar. but does he really want this because he doesn't want to see you anymore, or it is something else ?

is it the fact he doesn't hate you, but maybe hate seeing you giving all your attention to oscar ?

is it the fact he doesn't hate you, but hate the way you ignore him, act like he doesn't exists when all he wants is to be the only one you would look at ?

no. no it's not that. lando knows it. it can't be that. he hates you, your person. but why was he feeling strange then ? maybe because you are also always showing him that either you don't like him. that you desperately can't stand him.

he's acting the same way as you. he acts clumsy. and he ignores you. once you tried to approach him but he barely did look at you and walked away, and leave you alone like a poor child. or sometimes you would offer your help to the race team, but he's always the only one to refuse it and to reject it like you're doing everything wrong. you just don't understand at all.

you can remember, the first time he had addressed you your first words. but it is not a good memory. you were in the garage, near the cars of the drivers. they looked so pretty. the liveries were perfect. and you couldn't help but brushed softly lando's car, tracing the littles details on the halo. but you didn't expect him to caught you. he glared at you with frowning brows. "don't touch my car. oscar's one is enough for you" he said coldly to you.

yeah, you really started to hate him since this day. he's so disrespectful with you and he's not afraid to show it. but a part of you is still attracted to him, and despite the fact you can't stand him, you know that you're slowly falling for him. that your heart is succumbing itself to love. to his love.

it's so weird. you hate him just as you love him. and it's so strange because he hates you just as he loves you.

you sigh and shake your head, you were dazzling again. "y/n !!" oscar's voice makes you lift your head and you smile, your best friend is mirroring you. he walks towards you and wraps his arms around your shoulders. "you didn't tell me you'll be here !" he says and smile wider, so happy to see his childhood best friend.

you giggle and pull back, resting your arms on his forearm. "surprise oscar" you reply. he gives you an other smile before joining lando. they need to talk about strategies for the race later, and you hesitate to follow him. you don't want to be near lando, you hate him and oscar knows it. you always confess about whatever is disturbing you to him and so this topic has not escaped.

but oscar gives you a reassuring smile, and you know by his look that he doesn't mind if you follow him. actually he want you to stay a bit more with him before the race. because he missed you during these past few weeks.

"i know you don't like lando but it's okay, just don't talk to him" he says and approaches the group of lando, andrea, zak and two others strategists. "like i already do it" you scoff. he sigh "not false. but you get what i meant. just ignore him like usual".

you sigh and now you're standing right in front of the man you despise. he's leaning on the counter behind him, nonchalantly listening to the strategist. you try to keep yourself concentrated, but you notice it. you notice how lando is stealing glances at you. more like glaring at you but still he often turns his head to look at you. and he does it on purpose, he keeps gazing at you intensely. which disturbs you frankly speaking.

but it's enough. you don't even listen to the guys at this point. you shift and gather your courage to plant your look in his eyes. he realizes what just happened and you can tell he's disturbed, a hint of surprise hidden behind those blue eyes. but he holds your look, and you too. it seems like the world and the time stops. like they are only you in the garage.

the atmosphere is suffocating, yet strangely tense. it feels like the whole air is burning, but your bodies are filled with desire. as if a link brings you closer. you can feel your heart beats miles away, and lando sure he's not better. his gaze shift to your lips for a second, but he pulls himself together before you can notice it. but just, just one kiss.

he asks just for one. one kiss is enough right ? he just wants to see what it feels like to move his lips on yours. maybe it'll be sweet and soft. it means nothing right ? he can kiss you and yet act like he doesn't like you. he can, a kiss means nothing to him and you right ?

he inhales deeply, feeling his muscles and whole body get tighter. it's bad. really bad. how much effect you have on him just by a simple look. it's not fair. he can't loose all his senses, he can't loose his mind because of your presence. no he can't, because he's sure he despises you. he can't fall in love with you. no this is no longer what he wants. before maybe.

he's just afraid of the reality. he's scared and he denies it. but one day he'll have to accept it. he's falling in love with you. and falling very very hard.

-

the race was absolutely amazing. p2 for lando and p3 for oscar. mclaren couldn't have dreamed better. the drivers spray the champagne on the podium, and you stand here, watching them proudly. they did a great job today and you can't hide your joy just like the others members.

then you all go back to the garage, and oscar is welcome by you and your open arms. he literally throws himself into your embrace, and you smile wider while rubbing his back. oh god, you're so proud of him. "you're amazing oscar. you don't realize how proud i am of you. so so proud. you deserve this podium"

"thank you y/n. i love you, you know" he softly says, enjoying your hug. "me too oscar" and he pulls you closer. you can hear all the cheers from the garage, everyone is so happy about the results.

but lando is... different. he watches as all of the race team congrats him, and some of his closest friends hug him. obviously he hugs them back, thanks them for their precious support. but when he pulls back and catch you hug his teammate, he started to feel... jealous.

yes, jealousy.

thinking about that is funny, because for real why would he be so jealous of his mate for some girl he's hating on ? it's ridiculous, but yet he's glaring at oscar despite himself. oscar is the only one always congratulated by you, and lando is simply falling behind. but he can't help it, he's asking for it. asking for one hug.

just one quick hug. it's nothing right ? he wonders what it would be like to feel your arms around him, to melt into your embrace. maybe it'll be comforting. but it means nothing right ? a hug and a kiss are nothing, he's just curious that's all.

but it is enough to ask ?

lando sighs and shakes his head. what is wrong with him ? he's getting insane because of the one person he's supposed to hate, but it seems like his true feelings can not be hidden anymore. is he going to admit it ? will he finally face the reality and says that he's falling for you more and more everyday ?

meanwhile, you are still at oscar's side, waiting to tell him your good news. you let him finishes his duties and wait for him in his driver room. he opens the door and smiles at the sight of you. "my best friend is here for the best podium. couldn't have asked for more" he gives you a sweet look. "true you couldn't have asked for more because i want you to know that i'll be a f1 presenter for the next season". you ramble and grin.

he stops what he was doing. his brain really stopped to function correctly. did he hear well ? he shift to look at you, and the surprise in his eyes make you laugh. he looks so surprised but also happy, like he's smiling so hard right now. "what... for real ? you're graduated ?" he asks still not realizing.

you quickly nod your head and smile widely. "i'm going to get the job of my dream. so see you next year on the track!" you say and he runs to hug you. this is literally the best day of his life. double podium for mclaren and then his best friend lands her dream job. everything is genuinely perfect. his heart hurts from joy.

he quits his driver room to tell the new to lando. because he's too overwhelmed by the happiness, he needs to share it. oscar knows how lando hates you too. he knows how you too can't handle each other. but it's stronger than him, lando must know about the news.

he finds his teammate nearby, and he doesn't wait a second to run towards him. "lando !! know what !" he starts thrilled. the curly haired frowns a bit. "what ?" he asks. "y/n will be a f1 presenter for the next season, she just have been graduated !! mate i think i'm dreaming, pinch me please." he rambles and stretch his arm.

lando stops working. what ? no he's dreaming too. "i think you should pinch me too because i feel like i'm in a dream which i'll never wake up from" he says, his eyes darting out. what the fuck is happening ?

so handling you during the races was not enough, now he'll have to see you every weekend for a whole year.

it scares him. because he knows how much impact it'll have on his feelings. it's going to be difficult. so hard. he can't barely stop himself from thinking about you all day so being in your presence every week end will be another level.

but strangely, he can't wait. he can't wait for this next season, maybe because he'll finally be able to see you more than this year....

[femd-archive]

can you do another oikawa x dom reader x iwazumi plz🥺🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

sorry for taking so long to reply! ˙◠˙ omg i love writing for iwaoi, i think it shows with this being the 3th fic that i have for them(ᵕ—ᴗ—) thank u for your request! ♡

BLOWING STEAM

pairing: haikyuu!! — oikawa x iwaizumi x fem!reader

word counting: 2.5k

content warning: timeskip!iwaoi | polyamorous relationship | use of petnames like baby, angel and love | cunnilingus | fingering (female receiving) | masturbation (male receiving) | lots of kisses | might be too cheesy because i love them sm T-T

summary: after a stressful day, tooru and hajime team up to make [name] blow off some steam

side note: english is not my first lenguage, so i apologize in advance for any grammar mistakes

Closing the door behind her, [Name] yawns as she starts taking her shoes off in the entrance at the same time. "I'm home" she announces, putting her backpack down and taking off her jacket.

A mix of soft and rushed footsteps are heard from afar. Soon, both Tooru and Hajime are standing in front of her with soft smiles on their faces, and that sight is enough to make all the stress of her the day melt away.

Tooru doesn't waste time to bring her into his arms in a hug. "Welcome home ~" he litters her neck with little kisses, making her giggle because it tickle.

Iwaizumi reaches out for [Name]'s bag on the floor and picks it up, throwing it over his shoulder. He then turn around again and looks at his partners with a tender gaze, enjoying seeing them express their feelings towards each other so easily and making his heart swell with love.

[Name] catches a sight of Iwaizumi's lovesick face as Tooru finally lets her go, even though he still had an arm wrapped around her waist. "I'm home" she repeats, this time with a more soft and tender tone, looking at her boyfriend like she just wanna melt in his arms, and so does he.

He nods, a small smile drawing on his lips. "Welcome home" he replies, scooting closer to leave a tender kiss on her lips. They linger there for a little bit, lips moving against each other like they don't want this moment to end.

Once they pulled apart —Iwaizumi leaving another little kiss on [Name]'s forehead— they walk to the living room hand in hand, and [Name] throws herself in the couch with a grown.

"Long day, baby?" Tooru asks, reaching a hand to caress her forearm, looking at her with such a tenderness in his eyes.

"Wouldn't you like to know" she sighs, closing her eyes. "The professor was insufferable today. Like, he's the one calling in sick 2 times per week, but it's our fault that we don't have enough material to study from for the finals?" she frows, a confused look plastered on her face, making her boyfriends laugh, "and he's snapped at me for telling him that!"

"No he didn't" Tooru gasps, eyebrows frowning as well.

"What an asshole" Hajime mumbles as he caresses [Name]'s thigh with his thumb.

"I know right? The worst part is that his subject is not even that important for the degree" exhausted, she rubs her hands on her face. "I don't know, for things like this I feel like quitting sometimes"

"Hey baby, don't say that" Tooru scoots closer, and so does Hajime, wrapping their arms around her figure. "I mean, if you want to quit then that's your choice, but don't let an asshole like that professor bring you down" the brunet leaves a kiss on her cheek, caressing her shoulder with his thumb.

Hajime nods. "You've worked so hard to get here to. This is your dream career" he reminded her. "Yeah, some professors can be insufferable, and that's gonna make you frustrated, but we're always gonna be here to listen to you vent and comfort you" he promises silently, keeping up with his caresses on her thigh.

Tooru's voice make [Name] turn around to him again. "We know you're strong, and you've got this, but it's okay to feel down sometimes" he reminds her again.

[Name]'s heart swell with love at her boyfriends' encouraging words, and she hopes she can convain even just a little bit of that love in the sweet kisses she leaves on their knuckles. "Thank you, loves. I really needed to hear that today"

Tooru smiles and leaves a little peck on her lips. "There's nothing to thank, cutie. Just boyfriends doing boyfriend things" he laughs as he watches Hajime attack her neck with kisses once again, smiling at the way she wiggles, trying to get away. "Say baby, are you up to some pampering? Or are you too tired?" making soft circular massages on her knee, the setter asks in a low tone.

"Oh ~ I would love some massages please. I think I have a knot on, like...my lower back" she comments, Hajime now leaving kisses down her shoulder.

Tooru chuckles. "We can get to that later" he moves from his spot on the couch until he's on his knees on the floor, between [Name]'s legs. "I was talking about a different type of pampering" he says with a sultring tone, hands caressing her inner thighs as he looks up at her with big doe eyes.

[Name] bits her bottom lip, already feeling aroused at the simple sight of her pretty boy on his knees for her. She reaches her hand out, dipping her fingers on his silky hair and combing it softly. Tooru closes his eyes, leaning into her loving touch.

"My sweet boy, always so eager to please" she moves her hand to caress his cheek.

Iwaizumi's sudden shuffle makes [Name] look back at him. He undid his embrace around her and she watches as he takes a spot next to Tooru on the floor, cheeks flushed pink as he looks to another direction. Tooru chuckles at his boyfriend's state and leaves a kiss on his cheek, finding him cute, just as [Name] did.

She smiles. "My two sweet boys" she puts emphasis on the number, reaching to caress Hajime's cheek as well, "I'll love to be pamper by the both of you" she bends over to leave a kiss on both their lips. "Thank you, loves"

"Don't thank us before we even make you cum" Tooru winks at her, making [Name] roll her eyes teasingly.

As she lays back on the couch, getting comfortable, she looks down at her boys. Oikawa had already lifted up her shirt, leaving small kisses on her hip as his hand runned up and down her right leg. Iwaizumi didn't fall bahind, also leaving some kisses in the other side of [Name]'s abdomen, his teeth brushing against the skin and softly biting it, leaving some barely noticable marks on there. She sighs, already melting into their loving touch and caresses.

Tooru's agile fingers undid the jean's button in a second, followed by the zipper. Both men moved in sync, taking each side of the clothing and wiggling off [Name]'s legs. Once they were off, they plaster a trail of kisses until they reach her crotch. Iwaizumi leaves a kiss on her clit over the fabric of her panties, and Tooru doesn't fall behind when he licks a long strip up and down, slightly sucking at her clit, also over the fabric.

[Name]'s whole body shake, letting out a shaky breath as her boyfriends continue to leave kisses on her inner tighs. "Fuck..." she whispers, trying to maintain her eyes on both of them as they work together again to take her panties off, finally freeing her wet pussy that lay in front of them.

Their eyes sparkle like it was their first time seeing it. Tooru's long fingers come up to spread her folds, getting them immediately wet. "So pretty..." he whispers, bitting his bottom lip down and looking up at his girlfriend with mischievous eyes. He looks back at Hajime, and Hajime looks back at him, sharing a secret lenguage that [Name] never picked up.

After a few more seconds of their lingering gaze, without warning, Hajime was the first to dive in [Name]'s wetness, making her throw her head back while closing her eyes. His tongue draws long strips from her slit to her clit again, before getting on sucking on it like it was his favorite meal.

Tooru's slender fingers surprises [Name] when she can feel two of them inserting themselves in her, slowly. She looks down on him, who's already looking at her with loving eyes, his free hand caressing her thigh as she gets use to the feeling of his fingers on her. Being so busy, they haven't have time to relax with each other, so it's been a while since any of them felt each other's touch.

"Can I?" the brunet asks after a while, still administrating caresses with his thumb on her thigh. [Name] only nods, sending him a reassuring smile. With that, he starts pumping his fingers, carefull not to hit Hajime in the jaw, but also not painfully slow for [Name] not to feel good.

The room fills up with [Name]'s moans and the wet sounds her boyfriends are getting out from her pussy. It's been a while since Hajime had move to his side, leaving a spot for Tooru to get in and also start lapping on their girlfriend's needy cunt. Now [Name] had to eager puppies, on their knees, eating her out like it was the best part of their day. And yes, it was.

Their tongues brushed against each other, as well as their breath became one, even sending shivers down [Name]'s body at how close their breath was. Tooru couldn't help the tentation, and sucked on Hajime's tongue, bringing them into a messy kiss. Chins dripping with their girlfriend's juice, they kiss slowly; lingering on the edge before attacking each other's lips again.

They pull apart, not before having a little peck, and moving back on [Name]'s waiting pussy. "That was so hot" looking at them through her eyelashes, she mumbles with a little smile.

Tooru smiles. "Mmh, yeah? You're hotter" he leaves a kiss on her inner thigh before diving into her cunt again.

Hajime follows him, and picks up his spot between her legs, both lapping on her folds at the same time their hands started gropping on their hard cocks over the fabric of their trousers. It didn't take long for them to whip them out, and starting to jack off as they savour their girlfriend out. Tooru's wrist motions were more desperate, while Hajime's where slower, most of his attenion focused on lapping [Name]'s folds.

Tooru goes in to suck her clit, closing his eyes as he enjoys her taste and the moans he's taking out of her, moaning for both making his girlfriend feel good and his hand ministrations on his cock. Hajime slips two of his fingers inside of her, pumping them as he looks up at his girlfried in awe, loving her expressions.

Feeling the heat pool in her lower stomach, [Name]'s eyebrows furrow deep, mouth hanging open as she feels her orgasm creeping closer.

"Mmgh, fuck. Guys...I'm gonna cum...gonna cum" [Name] started whispering like a mantra, bucking her hips up the men's faces. She reaches her hands to hold their heads, and both of them stick their tongue out so she could fuck their face, jacking their hard cocks off as they look up at her with those cute teary eyes.

[Name] cums, mouth agape in a silent moan and brows furrowed deep as her hips buck in her boyfriends' faces, clit pulsating as she cums all over their tongues. As she rides her orgasm, she collapses on the cushions as moans finally drags from her lips. She does her best to open her eyes, caughting the sight of her two boys bobbing their heads as they lick her pussy like some puppies, eyes close as they do so. So cute...

Letting out a gasp, her once tense body drops softly on the couch, chest moving up and down as she tries to regulate her erratic breath. Opening her eyes, she looks down at her boys, who are already looking at her with sweet smiles in their wet lips, hands caressing her legs to help her calm down after her orgasm. She smiles back at them, a tired smiled.

"C'mere" she whispers, motioning their empty spots in each side of her.

They climb the couch again, Tooru not wasting any time in kissing her lips, sharing some of her own taste in his tongue as they share a slow sensual kiss. Hajime kisses her neck, patiently waiting for his turn to kiss her too.

As they switch, [Name]'s hands find their way to her boyfriend's neglected cocks, starting to pump them without any other warning.

"Ah ~ baby...there's no need to-"

"Shhh" she interrupts Tooru after pulling away from Hajime's kiss. "It's my turn to treat you right. It's only fair after you treated me so good" shrugging her shoulders, she sends a smile her way and moves her focus on jacking them off.

The men's moans now fill the room in return, along with the squelching sounds of their pre being used as a kind of lube with each stroke. [Name] looks up at them, having a good timing to caught her boyfriends leaning in for a sloppy kiss, moaning in each other's mouths. She bites her bottom lip down. «So hot»

Tooru pulls away from the kiss with a 'pop' sound, hissing as his hand reaches to grab his girlfriend's wrist, wanting her to slow down but not doing more than just hold her wrist.

"Mmh, gonna cum?" she asks, leaving a kiss on his hip, looking up at him with a smile and then switching her gaze to Iwaizumi, who's biting down on his bottom lip, eyes closed as he tries so hard to not thrust his hips into [Name]'s closed fist.

"Yes..." Tooru answers with an airy tone, throwing his head back as he feels his orgasm coming.

"Go ahead, loves" she speeds her hand motions.

Iwaizumi's hand comes up to rest on her shoulder, seeking some kind of support as he feels his legs getting weak as ropes of cum sprout from his tip, landing on her lap and some on her shirt. Tooru follows behind, cumming with his girlfriend's name on his lips, bucking his hips up as his cum also lands on her lap, dirtying her thighs.

[Name] hugs Hajime from the waist as she sees his thighs trembling, also pulling Tooru close to her. They all end up cuddling on the couch, their erratic breaths being the only thing that could be heard on the room at the time.

Coming to his senses, Tooru chuckles, smooching [Name]'s cheek and then moving in closer to kiss Hajime's forehead as the trainer lays his head on the woman's shoulder. "That was so good" he mumbles, "did you like it, baby?" he asks, looking back at his girlfriend and littering her face with kisses.

"I loved it" she responds before kissing the brunet lips. Hajime moves from his spot on her shoulder to kiss her as well, and then being pulled in a more softer kiss with Tooru. "Thank you, loves. I think we all needed that" she lets out a laugh, hands coming to run her fingers through their hair.

"Absolutely" Iwaizumi comments, bringing a hand to scoop some of the cum that was splattered on [Name]'s thighs. "I think we also need a bath"

"I'll go get the water running" Tooru smiles content, kissing each of his partners cheek before getting up, legs still shaking a little bit.

"And I'll order something to eat once we're out" Hajime leaves another kiss on her cheek, putting his boxers on before getting up to look up for his phone.

[Name] layed there on the couch for a few more minutes, a fool-like smile on her face as she melts on the ongoing sensations and the memories of her lovers touch and kisses. She was so lucky to have such wonderful boyfriends.

[council-of-beetroot]

As we see an increase in antisemitism I have reflected on my experiences how many years ago being the token Jew in my eighth grade English class and I have found some aspects about it which lead me to believe are the parts that Holocaust Education in the U.S. goes wrong

Being taught in English Classes

Often such as in my state, the Holocaust is taught as part of English curriculum. English teachers aren't history teachers and they may be lacking in the skills or knowledge required to teach in the necessary depth to discuss the Holocaust.

My mother used to teach English but she had a history degree as well. She would lecture in class about everything leading up to and during WWII. I remember reading handouts she had in her classroom while I was waiting after school about the history of antisemitism. I didn't have any of this in my English class unit, because to put it simply most English teachers aren't my mother who also has the prior knowledge of how to teach history.

Additionally, as it is part of English, there is often more focus on Holocaust literature rather than the topic itself

This is where I think it gets extremely flawed if a person's primary knowledge of a historical period is Anne Frank or the incredibly inaccurate boy in the striped pajamas. A single account or work of complete fiction shouldn't be your main lens to view any topic whether it's the Holocaust, Slavery, Civil Rights movement etc.

You're in short blurring fact and fiction when discussing these things in the context of literature.

Sense of Finality

I feel like in my classes at least there was this idea that was kind of implied that hatred of Jews began and ended with Hitler and the Holocaust. I think this leads to misconceptions about antisemitism.

I feel this is a problem as I remember mistakenly getting that takeaway in school regarding civil rights in America. It was taught that Slavery was a problem, emancipation proclamation, MLK said I have a dream, and the civil rights act was passed and bam no inequality or racism. Later on, I fortunately learned this was flawed for many reasons. But not everyone does.

Not teaching about how the Holocaust happened

If you aren't given the knowledge of how centuries of hatred lead up to the Holocaust, I feel the main takeaway becomes that it was almost a random occurrence.

Many learn the Holocaust is bad without learning the signs of thinking that can lead neighbors to kill neighbors.

So many people don't have the basic facts such as Hitler being elected rather than assuming power.

I think when you learn of an atrocity of such scale without learning the human beliefs that brought about it, you have learned nothing.

I had a girl in my college uni class who was shocked when I said that antisemitism didn't begin and end with Hitler. I can see where she would get this idea if I at ten figured that racism ended with MLK.

Using Simulation

Slavery and the Holocaust should probably not be taught using roleplay. It usually goes poorly and you can find dozens of examples of how this goes wrong.

Sanitizing History

Exactly what it sounds like. But it's a major problem in general with history education in the US. I think we downplay westward expansion, and slavery in the us. When we downplay those it's easy to see how some begin to downplay the Holocaust.

We had a kid faint on the trip to the Holocaust memorial at some of the images. I think it was because they were inadequately prepared to see the horrors in image, my teacher didn't show any pictures in class.

Final notes

I don't blame teachers. Teacher's jobs fucking suck from what I've seen and many don't have the skills or resources or experience. I guess for now I think it's good to recognize those holes in our education and fill them ourselves through self education and life long learning

With the current political atmosphere of education of the unpleasant or difficult to discuss parts of history, i can only see things getting worse if we don't change anything. But like I said in the absence of a solid education which discusses these topics, it's important to educate ourselves and confront our lack of knowledge.

[ikeoji-subs]

Zettai BL Ni Naru Sekai VS Zettai BL Ni Naritakunai Otoko 2024 - Episode 6 Eng Sub

VS SHOOTING and VS FALLING IN LOVE

It's the season 3 finale!

For downloading instructions and where to find the raw files, please check our masterpost.

[Subs link]

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This is the final episode of this season! We're both going to miss working on this project. When it comes to plans for the future, we're still figuring that part out, but rest assured that we'll keep everyone posted here if we have another project in the works. For the moment, we once again want to thank everyone who has spread the word or had a kind word for us in the tags and elsewhere.

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translation notes:

about “acknowledge the way I feel” (20:27)

The first, more literal translation of this line, which Hatano says on the bridge, was, “Can you accept my feelings?” That line definitely gets something across, but I knew we’d be leaving it open to varied interpretations–some of them inaccurate–if we didn’t make it more specific. I might go a little overboard in the specificity department sometimes. I think it’s probably due to a combination of my ADHD-related quirks and having spent too much time picking apart variables as a researcher. Whatever the reason, this time I was kind of in overdrive because this line seemed pretty important. 

I asked Snow some questions about what “accept” meant in this instance. In English–and in the American cultural context I’m used to–there are lots of specific ways to talk about a situation like this one. Someone in Hatano’s position in the US would have a plethora of options for inquiring about Mob’s thoughts and emotions and/or making requests about how he might respond to their feelings. Is Hatano asking Mob to simply believe that he has these feelings about him? To let him show these feelings toward him openly, even if he only allows this passively, without offering anything in return? To receive them in a way that implies he returns them or that otherwise implies some degree of connection between them? And so on. 

I was expecting cultural differences to come up around this line, but they came up in a way I wasn’t expecting. Snow responded by telling me that there wasn’t a really specific meaning behind the Japanese wording of this line and that that was characteristic of the Japanese language around such things. I knew that I was more intense than the average American about wanting to pinpoint the meanings of things, but it would seem that the average American is more intense about it than the average Japanese person. 

That was a really interesting insight (one that I’m still thinking about), but it still left me with a conundrum when it came to this line. I could stick with “accept,” since it had a kind of vagueness to it (which was part of the reason I started trying to reword the line in the first place). But I thought “accepting” feelings sounded closer than I’d like to possibly reciprocating them, and I knew from my conversation with Snow that that shouldn’t be implied here. 

I started looking at thesaurus entries and going down different synonym paths. I wanted a word that, in its broadest sense, would be asking very little of the other person. I figured if the Japanese wording was open to being interpreted as either asking for very little or asking for more, then the English wording should be something that could at least be taken as not asking for much, because the implication that Hatano wants more than that from Mob is already clearly present. 

When I came across “acknowledge,” it fit the bill. At first, I just thought of its meaning on a smaller scale. It’s not much to ask of someone to simply acknowledge something, in most contexts. 

But after just a little bit of thought, I realized it also had a useful kind of vagueness. Acknowledgement can be as small as a barely perceptible nod, but it’s also used to talk about thanking someone, giving credit, commending or honoring someone, even giving someone a reward. In a romantic context, depending on the specific story, you could imagine “acknowledge” meaning anything from “yeah, I see you over there” all the way to someone’s devotion being rewarded in all the ways they’ve hoped for. 

Some of these uses are more of a stretch and would only work in just the right context. The default meaning of the word is clearly on the more modest side. But that works well, too. I took this request as coming from a pretty humble, unassuming place and I figured “acknowledge” was reflective of that. 

I ended up being really happy with this word choice. Hopefully, it’ll get the right idea across to folks who watch the show with our subtitles, even if they don’t read this translation note. But I hope that reading this gets it across even more effectively.–Towel

Tag list: @absolutebl @bengiyo @c1nto @come-back-serotonin @lurkingshan @my-rose-tinted-glasses @porridgefeast @sorry-bonebag @twig-tea @wen-kexing-apologist

[carnivalls]

hi everyone, long time no see! coming back to tumblr with a pitch that one friend rated 12/10, another 15/10, and no one less than a 10 (that i will be mentioning for the purposes of this post).

so basically me and my girlfriend are in our final year as university undergrads, and are fighting for our lives for stuff to put on our cvs / master applications that falls in line with our degree programs and interests (english literature for both). as much as i'd like it to, 'spending well over 80 hours mapping out dnd sessions' for some reason doesn't tend to appeal to employers or admissions offices.

this is where VULTURE CULTURE comes in.

we've laid out the principal tenets on the 'about' page, but a tldr for whoever is interested:

At Vulture Culture, we aim to take the works of people they may not necessarily feel the best about, works that may not otherwise see the light of day, and give them a ‘home.’ We believe that there’s no such thing as a story not worth telling. By not charging submission fees (be so for real) and keeping our guidelines few, we also hope to erode some of the traditional barriers in publishing, and create a more accessible space for all.

in other words, GIVE US YOUR LEFTOVERS.

we are a literary magazine that will accept anything that exists in the mid range of what you love and hate. have you ever wanted to be published but where do you even start? here. are you unsure what to do with that old work that's been sitting in your drafts forever (it's good enough to post, but not good enough to be picked up by anyone of significance)? hi.

our first issue theme is NEW BODIES, and we are just as curious as you to find out what that means. deadline is march 1st, 2024.

come help us be employable or whatever. also in return you get to clear up some draft space and see your name in print. together, love wins 🏆

[rin-fukuroi]

𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤, 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮! [𝐍𝐞𝐮𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞]

Please do not translate or publish my works without my permission.

The originals of my works can be read here

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Pairings: Neuvillette x fem!reader

Warnings: just a little funny fluff~

▶• ılıılıılıılıılıılı. Aimer - Kataomoi

Note: English is not my native language, so I apologize if there are errors in the text qq

Happy birthday, the cutest otter in the whole Fontaine (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ ) ♡

You are peacefully turning over the page of your book, lounging in an armchair, when the sound of a door opening and quiet footsteps comes from the hallway. You barely have time to close the book, as your beloved, always calm and collected husband appears on the threshold with two large bags in both hands.

For a moment, he just stands there in the doorway, just like you in the chair, blinking in puzzlement, looking into Neuvillette's mother-of-pearl eyes.

— Neuvi… what is this?

Judex follows your gaze, noticing that you are nodding towards the packages, and raises his eyebrows, returning again to the puzzled expression on your face as you put the book down in the corner of the chair, across which you are sprawled, dangling your legs from the armrest.

— These are gifts.

— Gifts?

— Yes. There's water there.

You open your mouth a little, just looking at your husband in disbelief for a second.

— Did they present you water?

— Yes.

— Two bags of water?

— Yes. Is something wrong?

You turn over, sitting up straight, deciding that such a serious conversation isn't worth continuing in such a relaxed position.

— Why do we need two bags of water, Neuvi? — you sigh, raising an eyebrow.

— But it's all from different places and has different tastes. Isn't it amazing that you don't even have to travel around Teyvat to enjoy the exquisite taste of water, unique in each region? Everallin managed to get water from Natlan from somewhere, and…

— Okay, okay, I get it, — you chuckle softly, getting up from your chair to go to Neuvillette and take the bags of precious gifts from him, leaving them on the table standing not far from the two of you. Then you hurriedly pull out a drawer, taking out something small that you immediately hide behind your back, coming closer to your lover with a playful smile, all the while watching you with a degree of wariness. — You're just going to fall over from what a cool gift I've prepared for you! I swear, even the water from Celestia can't compare to this.

«Will I fall? Is it something dangerous?..»

— Well, I suppose you understand, I'll gladly accept anything from you, Y/N, — Neuvillette clears his throat, nervously adjusting the jabot* on his neck.

— M-m, no, this is something special, you will definitely like it, — you close your eyes, proudly lifting your head and smirking smugly.

Neuvillette almost felt a cold drop of sweat roll down his forehead before you finally abruptly extend your hand from behind your back forward, thrusting it right under the slightly frightened man's nose… Is that an otter?

You peek out from behind a small stuffed toy, lightly pressing on the belly of a blue-white otter holding a pink shell in she's hands, meeting Neuvillette's completely confused gaze, examining the object in your hand.

— Look, it's just like you!

The otter's tiny black eyes look at Neuvillette, and Neuvillette looks at them, continuing to remain silent before still casting an anxious glance at you.

— Me? Are you sure?

— Of course! When I first saw her, I thought that I couldn't find a more perfect gift. Come on, take it!

The Chief Justice hesitantly takes the gift from your hand, giving the stuffed otter one last puzzled look. You could literally hear the spinning gears creaking in his head as he repeated your action and pressed on the soft belly of the toy, which caused your melodious laughter, which finally pulled Neuvillette out of deep thought. No sooner had the man raised his head than your lips gently pressed against his cheek, and your palms rested on Neuvillette's hands, clutching your little gift.

— Happy birthday, Neuvi.

He's definitely very lucky to connect his life with a girl like you.

*jabot is a finishing element for decorating the neckline of a blouse, dress or men's shirt in the form of frills, flounces or ruffles made of fabric or lace running down the chest (or just these little ruffles on the collar of a Neuvillette:D).

[incorrectbatfam]

i just read the wayne family adventures chapter that released yesterday and i'm in need of some steph and damian headcanons

They've gotten into the most arguments over who gets to drive the Batmobile

Damian: "I'll drive"

Steph: "You're twelve"

Damian: "And yet I still drive better than you"

Bruce sides with Steph and ten minutes later Damian is gripping for dear life as she goes twenty miles over the speed limit

Steph sends a multiple-paragraph story about her mission abroad with pictures, emojis, and a hundred exclamation points, only for Damian to reply, "k"

Having food around is legitimately stressful because Damian is a growing boy who will eat everything. Steph gets up to grab a drink with her muffin and comes back to a wrapper and crumbs

He offers to pack her lunch when Alfred's hands are too full. Steph takes him up on it, thinking Alfred already made something. She doesn't check her lunchbox until later, when she finds a brick of tofu and Tupperware full of grapes

Steph reminisces about an old TV show and for the rest of the day Damian copies everything she says in an old person voice

Then Damian asks what a Walkman is and it's Steph's turn to pinch his cheeks and talk in a baby voice

Steph: "Robin's the worst"

Goon: "Yeah, he is"

Steph: "You take that back!"

He sold her high school essays online and gave her a 10% cut of the profit

Damian gets a rat and Steph names it Remy, knowing he hasn't seen Ratatouille yet

She uses his head as an armrest

Steph and her friends go out to celebrate finals being over. Damian follows them to the restaurant and keeps sending milk to their table every five minutes

Damian rickrolls her through her AirPods

Steph has a special type of anger set aside for when Damian jams the carnival port-a-potty shut while she's in it

Damian gives her a misshapen rock and says, "It's the egg that hatched you"

Steph: "This is my little brother, Damian"

Damian: "We're not siblings"

Steph: "…As I was saying, this is my little brother, Damian"

She sticks a picture of Damian on the icebox to guarantee it stays cold

*After a big meal* Damian: "I cannot eat another bite"

Steph: "Same. Wanna get ice cream?"

Damian: "I'll drive"

Steph: "Like hell you are"

Damian: "Then I call shotgun"

Steph: "Bold of you to assume we're inviting the others"

Damian has a creative writing assignment for English and Steph offers to look it over, but instead of giving him feedback, she gaslights him into thinking he plagiarized Game of Thrones

However weird the Rogues may be, Damian can guarantee there's something in Steph's camera roll that's even weirder

Jason teaches Damian to swear and Steph un-teaches him by playing the bleeping sound effect every time he does

Steph rents half her storage garage to Damian to store the canoe he found. They're still trying to figure out what to do with it

Damian: "I have to infiltrate a horse ranch and I need you to communicate with your equine brethren"

Damian asks Steph to come to Career Day. She's confused at first because at the time she's a student working a part-time retail job, but shows up anyway. When it's his turn, he brings her up to the front and says, "This is my sister, Stephanie. She doesn't have a degree yet, gets paid minimum wage for a job I can do with my hands tied, and is the only one in my family who doesn't know what she's doing." Steph starts to get annoyed, but then Damian says, "I brought her today because she doesn't let her lack of direction hold her down. She has taught me that it's okay if you don't have a destination and life happens on your own terms, not someone else's."

Steph comes to the Manor one day to find everyone crowded around Damian's door. Dick explains that the person Damian asked to the 8th grade dance ditched him last minute and no one's been able to coax him out—not even Alfred with cookies. Steph goes in and after a while, he tells her about the work he put in (for a middle schooler, aka an ironed shirt and reservations at a place rhyming with Bolive Darden) only for it be a setup to make fun of him. Steph asks when the reservation is and he says it's in twenty minutes. She says she only needs ten and emerges in her old homecoming dress. Then they grab dinner before skipping the dance altogether to go bowling and destroy some unsuspecting 9-year-olds at laser tag.

[waitineedaname]

I have caved. here is my pitch for why Shigeo "Mob" Kageyama needs to win the @autismswagsummit (or at the very least get to the finals)

people have already talked about his intense autism coding (difficulty reading social cues, low empathy/high compassion, strict moral code, flat affect, bluntness, hyperfixating, emotional dysregulation/emotions being all or nothing) but I'm going to put my English degree to good use and talk about the narrative importance of Mob's autism

the entire plot of Mob Psycho 100 would not exist without Mob's autism

first and foremost, the 100 in Mob Psycho 100? it's a symbol of Mob's emotional dysregulation. the narrative uses a percentage counter as a device to indicate Mob's emotional state -- the percentage till Mob's "explosion." emotions and psychic powers are directly related within the narrative, and because he fears the strength of his emotions/powers, he's been repressing his emotions since he was a child. however, as anyone who tries to repress their emotions can tell you, that only works for so long. the percentage meter indicates the build up of emotions until he cannot repress them anymore -- until he essentially has an emotional meltdown through a psychic explosion. these explosions aren't strictly negative emotions either; they can range a wide spectrum of emotions, from rage and sadness to gratitude and trust. any buildup of emotions can be overwhelming and trigger a meltdown

aside from that, the core thesis of the series is self-acceptance. Mob starts off the series with painfully low self-esteem, for a number of reasons -- he dislikes that he doesn't fit in, he feels massive guilt for allowing his psychic powers to hurt his brother when they were little. he wishes he didn't have these powers (which, I cannot emphasize enough, are a metaphor for autism) and he wishes he could just be "normal." over the course of the series, it is emphasized over and over that psychic powers are normal, they're just another trait a person can have. there's good parts of them and bad parts, but at the end of the day, they are a neutral trait. you can understand why "your autism is a normal part of you, not something to be hated or feared" is an important message

which brings us to the final arc of the series. Mob Psycho 100 does not end with a climactic battle with some big bad, but rather with a confrontation between Mob and the part of himself he's locked away. this other part of him symbolizes a lot of things, but most importantly it symbolizes his psychic powers and his autism. since he realized as a child that his psychic powers (autism) could potentially hurt someone if he's not careful, he's been shoving that part away from him and attempting to mask and be "normal." this manifestation of his psychic powers/autism is, understandably, pretty bitter and angry about this. at the end of the day, he just wants to be accepted for who he is -- not for the face he presents to the world, but for who he really is on the inside. the culmination of the whole story comes through his loved ones showing him that they love him in his entirety, even when he's volatile or upset. they love Mob as who he is, and because his psychic powers (autism) are part of him, they love that part of him too. the resolution comes when Mob finally accepts all parts of himself, even his psychic powers (autism) because they're nothing to be feared or hated. they're just part of him.

genuinely, Mob Psycho 100 is the best representation of autism I've ever seen. Mob isn't the only autistic coded character in the series (I could go on and on about Serizawa's adult autism or the relationship between Ritsu's gifted kid syndrome and his undiagnosed autism) but his autism is definitely the most important to the plot of the show. his autism is presented realistically, with kindness and nuance and, most importantly, with neutrality. even if you don't vote Mob in the autism summit (which, you should. come on.) if you're ever wanting a show about autism and self acceptance that is kind without being saccharine, I cannot recommend Mob Psycho 100 enough

also if this isn't a damning indication of the importance of autism in Mob Psycho 100, I don't know what is

@autismswagreblogs

[alia-schlatt]

Little Things || Jschlatt

♡ Summery ♡

A long day as a teacher ending in laughing with Jay.

♡ Warnings ♡

None, SFW

♡ Word Count♡

Total words: 885

♡ Authors Note ♡

Literally came up with this idea while in English class. Hope you enjoy!!

(Story under the cut)

"I've explained this to you guys many times, so I don't understand why you are all still confused. But let's go through it again."  sigh sharing my screen with the class of fifteen year olds, I was teaching. A small knock at the door was heard before it opened a crack. Schlatt stuck his head in and smiled. I muted and smiled at him.

"Hi"

"Hey Toots, I'm ordering some lunch from Allies. You want something for when your done with classes" He asks. 

"House Combo please, and do you think you can pour me a glass of coke?" I question. 

"Coming right up" He whispers giving me a wink and closing the door. 

"Sorry about that, just had to answer a quick question for someone. I hope you guys are going to listen this time because this is the last time I'm going over this task with you guys." I look at the chat bar of the google chrome meeting and sigh. "This task is due this evening at midnight Kylie" I answer the question. The door opens and Schlatt softly lays my diet coke on the table. He winks and gives me two thumbs up before closing the door again

********

Two and a half hours later I end my final class and stretch. I stand up and open my office door a sign that I'm not in a lesson. I quickly run and use the bathroom before coming back to the desk and ticking off stuff I've done off my to-do list. I still see there's a few things I haven't done yet that include marking a few tests and sending a few emails. I open spotify and put on a lofi playlist Schlatt had made at some point for me. I open my emails and continue working my head nodding to the beat. 

I don't even notice when Schlatt leans against the door frame and smirks at me. I'm typing away furiously, when he clears his throat startling me. I look up and his eyes soften.

"How long till your done with work toots?" He questions.

I look down at my to-do list. The last 3 tasks standing out to me. "half an hour at the most" I smile. He nods.

"Movie night?" he asks.

"Yes, but we need snacks" I tell him.

"Want me to run out and go grab some while you finish up here?" He asks.

I nod "I'll get started on dinner in the meantime" I tell him. 

"Don't worry, I'm craving pizza. I'll stop and get on the way home" He tells me. "You just destress, 'ight?"

"Sounds perfect" 

"Sweet, I'll see you soon beautiful" He says kissing my forehead before walking out the room. I heard him moving around our apartment before the door closing signaling he's left.

A few more sent emails and a few Market assignments later I'm finally turning off my PC for the weekend. I decide to take a shower and slip out of my jeans and button up exchanging them instead for a pair of pj pants and one of Schlatts hoodies. I pull the curtains in the lounge closed and turn on the TV. I run into our bedroom and grab my fluffy blanket on the bed to bring to the couch. When I walk back into the Living room Schlatts closing the Apartment door with his foot, Pizza and Target packets in one, a bunch of flowers In the other. He slides the two boxes of pizza onto the counter before laying the two target packets down afterwards. He turns to me. 

"Saw these and they reminded me of you. So perfectly perfect. Here" He says handing them to me. 

"Technically perfectly perfect isn't-" He cuts me off pulling me into his side and looking down at me. 

"Don' have to flaunt the english degree" he jokes and I smile sniffing the flowers. 

I look back up at him "These are perfect Jay, Seriously. Thank you" I smile. 

His hands slip onto my waist and he pulls me closer to kiss him. When we pull apart he keeps our foreheads touching. "I love you Toots" he says. 

"Love you too" I say pulling away from his grip and finding a vase for the flowers. I grab our snack plates and start going through what he brough. All of it's my favourite candy. Once we have our snacks we go and sit down on the couch, pizza snacks and a selection of drinks. I pull the blanket over me and Jay pulls me closer to him opening netflix. 

"What we watching?" I ask. 

"How's a romance sound?" 

"You Hate romances" 

"You love them"

"How's about a rom-com. You can at least enjoy that a bit" I say. 

"Whatever you want Toots"

"Are you just going to keep agreeing to everything I say?"

"I think so yeah"

I shake my head. "I love the small things you do for me Jay" 

He winks at me, putting on some rom-com with Adam Sandler and Jennifer Aniston. We spend the night half watching the movies, making jokes, and sharing smiles. My stomach hurts from laughter. I watch Schlatt as he starts trying to fight sleep. If only he knew how much these little moments together mattered to me.