#first point is from another post that lives in my mind I just don’t remember who said it sorry

[falseficus]

the two assumptions that make moby dick readable:

the entire book is being spoken aloud to you in line at the dmv

every detail queequeg told ishmael about his culture was a complete lie for his own amusement

[thyme-in-a-bubble]

341 days of foreplay

A/N: this used to be my most popular fic on here before I accidentally deleted everything. originally posted back in march/april, was some of the first smut I ever wrote, so keep that in mind, there's probably so many mistakes in this, I haven't edited it. also I changed the title, it used to be called i should've worshipped you sooner (gif in the moodboard is by my love @fightingdragonswithwho )

summary: Spencer overhears his roommate, Y/n, confess her true feelings for him.

warnings: Spencer Reid x reader, smut, roommates, drinking, chess, love confessions, kissing, orgasm denial, alcohol consumption, oral (male and female receiving), impact play, unprotected sex, penetrative sex, fingering, creampie, cumplay, dirty talk, praise, degradation, choking, spit kink, overstimulation, dom Spencer vibes 

word count: 3911

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You had been Spencer’s roommate for almost a year now, and for all of that time, you’d been hopelessly in love with him.

You often think that if his work didn’t take him out of state so often, you’d probably come clean about your feelings much sooner.

It was Friday night, and Spencer still hadn’t come home yet, from California you think you remember him texting you a few days ago? So here you were, in the kitchen, trying to open a bottle of wine. 

“You really shouldn’t mix wine and beer”, your friend’s voice boomed from your phone.

“Well, what do you want me to do, Eleanor? Just stop drinking after 2 beers?” you mocked, struggling with the cork. “This is not a 2 beers kind of day, so yeah, I’m switching to wine since it’s the only option that I have here. It’s that or stop, which is just, no.”

Even through the screen, Eleanor gave you her best disappointed parent expression and it stung. How had she perfected that? Shaking her head, she sighed, “you really need to move out.”

Popping the wine bottle open, you pointed the corkscrew at her, “don’t,” you warned, “I don’t wanna hear about it!”

“You can’t keep living with someone that you are head over heals for! Either tell him or move out and move on.”

“Or I could just keep drinking alone on a Friday night, and then go snooping through his things.” You raised the bottle up to cheers the screen, then took a large swig of it.

“What, your gonna become an alcoholic?”

“Hey, don’t judge my coping mechanisms little miss ‘I spent 3 months' wages in 1 minute after getting dumped by Sandra’. And who was so kind as to support you and lend you some money in order to get by, oh yeah that’s right, me, your oldest friend.”

She took a deep sigh, “fine. What are we drinking?”, then you saw her pick up her phone and move to her kitchen. 

“Yes!” you squealed, “I promise, I won’t even mention him the entire evening.”

“It's just like, when he talks with his hands, which is always, which is also always because he always rambles, they are just so, urgghhh” you slurred, and bent over the kitchen counter in order to get closer to the screen, because your vision wasn’t the best at the moment. “pretty. But also like, I want to feel them everywhere on, and inside me. And the veins, oh fuck…”

Eleanor was totally spacing out on her end of the line, so you just continued. “like the other day, he got home and was soooo mad, like only once in a blue moon mad. And I know that it’s kinda wrong of me to just be lusting after him in such a tough moment for him, but damn!”, taking another gulp of your now much lighter bottle. “He just looked, god, so good.” You almost moaned. “His delicious forehead vein was popping out, fuck I just wanna lick it. Like, he gets so petty, but in the hottest way! Fucking, just bend me over right then and there, and go at it for hours!” you carelessly set the bottle down on the counter, “I’d let him do anything he’d want! and I’m talking like some Erika Lust shit. Choke me, slap me, say open up and I’ll happily let him spit in my mouth”

“God, you need to get laid,” Eleanor complained. 

“I know, but I only want him. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to even think about anyone else in that way,” you admitted. 

“Aw, babes, you will”, she said with a sad smile, then looked up to the side “oh, it’s 1:05, I’m sorry, I really need to go to bed, but we’ll talk more tomorrow?”

“Yeah, sleep well” you sighed.

“And hey, don’t go fall asleep in his bed!” she quickly added before ending the call.

“That was one time!” you said to now no one.

Feeling slightly dizzy from the alcohol in your system, you leaned your head against the cool countertop. 

Hearing the sink turn on behind you, you whipped around, startled to find the aforementioned Spencer standing there, filling the kettle with water. 

“Jesus Christ! Spencer, what are you doing here?” you screeched. 

Breathing out a small chuckle, “as far as I’m aware, Y/n, I live here.”

“Yeah, I know that, I mean what are you doing home?”

Setting down the now filled kettle in its holder to boil, he turned to you, “the case ended, ergo I’m home now. That’s how it works, Y/n.” 

He kept on saying your name, making you shutter at the way it sounded. “You just usually give a heads-up first”.

He sighed, clearly not in the mood for this conversation, “yeah, well I didn’t.” 

Maybe it had been a tough case? God, if he kept up this mood for any longer, your ovaries were going to explode. 

Suddenly remembering the topic of the convocation you just had with Eleanor, your eyes widened, “ho-how long have you been home?”

“Why?” he said with a tiny smirk.

“Oh, no, I just, I didn’t hear the door or anything” you trailed off.

“Well, you were pretty loud, so it makes sense.”

“I-“ fuck, your heartbeat was raising, “um, did you hear?”

Narrowing his eyes, looking you up and down, taking in your nervousness, “would you really let me do anything I’d want?” 

You let out a shaky breath.

“Because, Y/n,” he moved closer to you, ”there are so many things I wanna do to you.”

Not truly believing his words, you asked, “you do?”

Choosing not to answer with words, he grabbed your face and kissed you fiercely, letting his tongue dance across yours. Humming into it, the combo of the feeling of the kiss mixed with the alcohol made the world spin, so you clutched onto his forearms for support. 

Abruptly pulling away, he studied your eyes, “you’re drunk.”

“Guilty as charged!” you beamed, moving your hands down his body.

Catching them before they could touch what they desired, “no.”

“What? If you don’t want to, then why did you just kiss me?” the words rushed out of you.

Chuckling lightly, he held your hands in his, “trust me, I do.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I really like you. I’ve known it for a while.”

“You do?” you smiled as you moved to kiss him again, but he turned his head before your lips could meet.

“But your drunk.”

“So what?”

“Y/n, I can’t with good conscience just bend you over and fuck you in the kitchen when you are drunk.”

Letting go of him, you leaned back against the cold slab and spread your legs a bit, “you could though, I want you to”, grabbing ahold of his hand, you moved it between your legs, “I’m yours if you want me.”

Growling, he closed his eyes. 

“Please” you whispered, grinding into his hand, trying to find some form of relief. 

Snapping his eyes open, his hand started to move, just a bit, moving up and down over your covered pussy. “Is this what you want?”

Shuttering, you replied, “yes.”

With a smirk, his hand moved inside of your pants, cursing under his breath when he felt just how wet you were, “is this all for me?”

Lips now slightly parted, you nodded hard.

Using two fingers, he pressed hard down on your clit, drawing tight circles. Bending down to kiss along your jaw and down your neck he asked amidst the kisses, “do you really want me to choke you,-“ kiss, “slap you-“ kiss, “and spit in your pretty little mouth?”

All you could do was hum in affirmation. 

“I had no idea that you were such a dirty little whore.”

“I just- really really like you,” you choked out, hips moving of their own accord, trying to aid in the goal.

Coming up to look at your face, “good, because I really really like you too”.

A combination of his sweet words, how good he was a finding the exact right place and pressure on you, as well as just the anticipation of it all making everything heightened and so much more intense, you felt yourself getting dangerously close to cuming.

“Oh fuck, Spencer, I’m-” you moaned, clutching onto his shirt.

But then, he removed his hand.

“No, no, no, no, no-“ you breathed, trying to catch it and guide it back to your center, but he wouldn’t let you. “I was so close.”

“I know.”

“Then why did you stop?”

“Because like I said, I’m not going to fuck you when you’re drunk.” His sentence was emphasized by the click of the kettle being done boiling.

“But-“ you tried to argue, but he cut you off.

“I want the first time you cum with me to be on my cock. I wanna feel it.” He explained, then turned to grab two mugs out of a cupboard.

Standing there, slightly stunned, you tried to decipher what the next move could be. The alcohol made it virtually impossible to think of anything other than getting railed by him, so you just sat up on the counter, catching your breath and watching him brew the coffee.

After a minute, you asked quietly, “so, we just go to sleep now?”

Filling the last mug, “no”, he turned and lifted you off from where you were sitting and back to a standing position, “we are going to wait.”

“Wait?” you questioned.

Grabbing one of the mugs, he handed it to you and confirmed, “yeah. How many drinks did you have?”

Scrunching your face up, you tried to remember, “um, 3, no 4, maybe?”

Licking his lips he said, “okay. Come with me.”

Hopping after his long strides, he stopped at his chess table and sat down, motioning with his hand for you to follow suit.

“We are going to sit here until you sober up.”

“Playing chess? Of course, that would be your definition of foreplay.” You teased, but ungracefully sat down as well.

Moving your rook forward four spaces, you asked, “is this even entertaining for you? You keep on beating me in like 5 moves.” 

One step ahead of you, he quickly moved his bishop and snatched up your last surviving knight. Then turning his big brown eyes to look at you, “oh trust me, this is very entertaining for me. Might be some of the best games I’ve ever played.”

Cocking your head to the side you almost laughed, “um, no. I know I’m not a very good chess player, I know the rules and there forth can somewhat follow along, but I am nowhere near skilled enough to be an entertaining chess partner to you, dr. Reid.”

“Who said that your chess skills had anything to do with it?”

Giggling lightly, you moved a pawn and muttered, “oh.”

It was his turn again, but this time he didn’t move a piece, but simply asked you, “are you still drunk?”

Your body tensed at what the question really meant. 

“I don’t think so,” you said honestly, then deciding to joke a bit, “why, do you want me to walk in a straight line? Touch my finger to my nose?” already doing the last movement in front of him.

Smiling, he asked, “do you still want to?”

Stopping your movements, you replied completely serious, “I don’t know how that’s even a question.”

He raised his eyebrows at you, waiting for the right words.

“Yes Spencer, I still want to.” Rubbing your thighs together at the building sensation that never quite disappeared from earlier. 

His eyes were glued on you as you lowered your body to the floor, kneeling in front of him, slowly running your hands up his legs.

Reaching a hand down to your cheek, he slipped his thump inside your mouth, completely entranced, it came out as almost a whisper “show me.”

The way he looked down at you made your pussy throb. Hollowing your cheeks and swirling your tongue around his finger, you watched him work at his belt.

“Be a good girl and show me.” Taking his finger back with a pop, then used both of his hands to free his cock.

The sight made you smile. Of course, even his dick was pretty.

“Open your mouth, Y/n,” and without another thought, you opened up and stuck your tongue out. Your eyes were big and doe-like, in awe of how he looked, sitting in front of you, working himself a couple of times.

Tapping the weight against your wet tongue, he groaned, “lick it”, and so you did, slowly a few times, just on the tip, then moving your head slightly to the side so you could trace his veins all the way down to the bottom, all the while keeping your eyes locked on his.

Moving your hand up to grasp the base, stroking it lightly as you came back to the tip, swirling your tongue around it a few times before pushing it past your lips. Slowly taking him further and further in, his hands were tangled in your hair, pulling at the roots whenever you would move your tongue just right. 

Letting him move your head for you, picking the pace, how far down you would go down and how long he would hold you there, enjoying the sound of you gagging. 

After a bit, moaning, he pulled you off his now glistening cock, “I’m not gonna last if you keep that up”.

Proud of yourself, you beamed up at him, whipping your mouth and chin with the back of your hand.

Pulling you up to him, he kissed you. Moaning into it, his hands went straight to your tits, palming them softly and then whispered against your lips, “take it off, slowly”.

Pushing yourself off him, you backed up a few steps, giving him a good view. Gradually, layer by layer you striped for him, turning when you got to your pants, in order to give him the best angle. Unconsciously, he mirrored your actions, taking his own off.

When you were both completely naked, his dark eyes drank you in, “get on the couch, ass up, now.”

Your body did as he wished by its own accord. Leaning over the back of his brown leather couch, you waited eagerly for him to get closer to you, and when he did, you grinded into the feeling of his body pressed up against yours. 

Running his fingers lightly through your folds, “mhm, you’re fucking soaked.”

“Please don’t tease me anymore,” you wiggled against him, “I want you inside of me, now.”

“Oh really?” he cooed, then landed a small slap on your pussy, surprising and hard enough to make you jump a bit, “you want it that bad? Do you just wanna be my pretty little whore?”

“Please, ruin me” you whined, as you felt the head of his cock brush against your entrance.

“Wait,” he said, panic suddenly filling his voice, “I don’t have a condom.”

As he began to pull away, you wouldn’t let him, “I don’t care, please just give it to me, please Spencer.”

“You serious?”

“I’m clean, please do it. I’ll just get plan b tomorrow”, you begged.

And without any more warning, he slammed the entirety of his dick inside of you, making you lose your breath and almost turn into putty in his arms.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” he groaned into your ear, then distanced himself from you by pushing you further into the couch and straightening up himself. Gripping onto your hips, he didn’t give you a moment to get use to the feeling of how much he stretched you out, but opting for a brutal pace. The snapping of his hips made your body jump in the best way. 

As he slapped your ass, you only got that much closer to cuming. His arms went around your waist and pulled you up against him. One firmly staying there, holding you close to his warm body, the other snaked its way up your body, staying at your boobs just long enough to pinch one nipple, then finding a home softly wrapped around your neck.

His face was right beside yours, occasionally placing a sloppy kiss on your cheek, neck or shoulder. Feeling you clench around him, he asked amidst his grunts and moans, “you gonna be a good girl and cum for me, Y/n?”

When you didn’t reply, too wrapped up in the feeling of it all, he taped your cheek lightly, “huh? Are you gonna cum on my dick?” 

Seeing stars now, you had no way of getting out actual words, and when his hand came down on your cheek again, this time a little harder, you gathered just enough strength to nod lightly.

“atta girl, let me feel you,” he cooed in your ear and returned his hand to his resting place around your neck. Your eyes struggled to stay open as the orgasm rocked through you. 

Legs shaking and trying to catch your breath, his trusts slowed down. Your head lolled back against his shoulder, and he kissed your cheek. “fuck, just when I thought you couldn’t get more beautiful.”

Smiling you reached your hand up to the side of his face, “let’s move this to your bed, I think I need to lay down”, you breathed out.

“Done already?” he asked in a joking tone.

Laughing lightly, you winched at the feeling it gave, making your sensitive walls clench around him, “no, I just don’t wanna fall.”

And with another peck on your cheek, he pulled out of you, but still held you close as you moved the short distance to his bed.

When you hit the mattress, you pulled him with you, letting him fall on top of you. Gasping as he slipped inside of you again, the feeling already starting to feel like home. 

“Oh, you’re taking my cock so well” he moaned, finding a good rhythm, picking the one that made your boobs jiggle the most. “God, I love your tits,” he thought out loud, playing with them, making you giggle a bit at the compliment. 

Craving the same sensation from before, you requested, “choke me.” He didn’t hesitate, wrapping his long fingers around your throat again, squeezing lightly at the points where your rapid heartbeat was easiest to feel. 

Your eyes were locked on each other’s, giving you a great chance to study just how blown his pupils were. Moving his big hand up, so that his thumb could rest on your bottom lip, “open” he breathed out. When you did as you were told, sticking your tongue out just enough for it to brush against his finger, his lips curled up into a proud smirk. The sensation of his spit landing on your tongue first surprised you, then did something you were not expecting it to do. You came again. Right then and there, the intimacy of the act being enough for you.

His smile only grew at the obvious signs of the power he had over you.

Then you blinked and he wasn’t above you anymore. But what he did next was enough for you to know exactly where he was. Your head shot down with a wince, to see him place sloppy kisses on your very sensitive clit. Reaching a hand down, you pulled him away, the sensation being too much. 

Head between your legs, he looked up at you, eyes sparkling, kissing your inner thigh, and muttering, “sorry, I just had to kiss you there”.

Placing your hand on his cheek, you stroked your thump up and down, then up to trace the angry vein on the side of his forehead, “just give me a second”.

Smiling, he leaned his head against your soft thigh, then turned his face to place a peck on the palm of your hand.

“mhm, okay”, you hummed after a few minutes. Spencer then sat up, pulling your tired body with him. You slumped down in his lap, like a koala, hugging your arms around him, nuzzling as close as you could. 

“You ready, Y/n?”

You hummed in reply, reaching one of your hands down to slip his dick inside of you again.

This time, you both just found a lazy and intimate rocking motion, not needing it to be hard and fast, but slow in order to make it last as long as possible. 

“fuck, I’m so close” he practically whined, “where so you want it?”

Through a string of breathy moans, you uttered one syllable, “-in- “, pulling back just enough for him to see the seriousness on your face.

“Oh, you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” he smirked, “We already live together, you want us to start a family?” his teasing only made your walls tighten their grip around him.

His movements became more ragged and desperate, “you’re just a little cumslut, aren’t you? You want me to fill you up?” whimpering in response, you buried your face in the crook of his neck and held on tight as he pushed you over another euphoric high. 

Grunting in your ear at the feeling of you milking him, you heard, “take it, all of it”, as he throbbed deep inside of you, filling you with his cum.

Staying like that, all tangled up and breathing heavy, for who knows how long. At some point, clutching onto you, he lowered you both down to lie on the soft mattress. 

Expecting him to stay and cuddle you, he instead sat back up and leaned back to admire the mess he had made. Stroking your thigh, he breathed out, “be a good girl and spread your legs for me.”

Slowly, you pushed your knees up and spread your legs apart, hearing him curse underneath his breath. Your body jumped when you felt his fingers trace your slit, gathering up the cum that had begun to drip out of you. Crying out suddenly as he plunged in two of his fingers, hips buckling, the sensation being too much for your overstimulated cunt.

“Uh, don’t get so whiny on me right now,” he cooed, looking down at you with dark eyes. He hooked his fingers and moved them furiously, “you said you wanted to cum? Now take it!”

Even when your hips tried to move away, his fingers followed. Soon the feeling of everything being too much got another thing added onto it. How could you possibly cum again? But somehow, you did just that. Spencer always had a way of making impossible things be possible.

Your whole body was shaking and quivering as Spencer laid down next to you and wrapped his arms around you. “Holy shit,” you said among your shaky breaths.

“Well, we did have 341 days of foreplay”, he joked.

“Yeah”, you laughed, brushing your hand up and down his arm. “Hey, Spence?”

“Mhm?” he hummed into your hair.

Taking a deep breath, gathering the courage, you confessed quietly, “I love you.”

His hand came to lift your face up to meet his, touching his forehead against yours, “Y/n, I love you too, so much.”

Tilting your head up a bit, you kissed his forehead, then curled back down under his chin and fell asleep in that warm cocoon of love that was your roommate Spencer Reid.

© 2022 thyme-in-a-bubble 

[squoosheez]

Sweet Relief

Finnick Odair x Reader

summary: Yesterday, the reaping took place. Your name was the one picked from thousands—and it was your last year to even be eligible. Being from district four, your mentor is none other than Finnick Odair. Prince of the Capitol. Your relationship is off to a rocky start, but on your second night, he starts to come around.

setting: The 70th Hunger Games. You’re the female tribute from District 4, on your way to the Capitol with your male tribute, Caspian, and your mentor, Finnick Odair.

pairing: Finnick Odair x Fem!Reader

warnings: smut, mentions of death, implied mentions of forced prostitution but not blatantly mentioned ykwim?

notes: I wrote this in two sittings and it’s not proofread and it’s also my first time posting anything on tumblr soooo…

word count: 5.2k

— • — • — •— • — • — •— • — • — •— • — • — •— • —

socials: ao3 (that’s all I have bcuz my cc isn’t working rn 😭

Thick, humid air circulates through your enormous room. This was not what you expected when they had called your name for the reaping. You still remember it like it’s happening in the present. You find yourself laying on your memory foam bed with satin sheets—courtesy of the capitol. One thousand thoughts race through your mind as you recall the events of this evening.

To start, you almost punched your mentor in the face. You try to convince yourself he deserved it, but he was just trying to lighten up the situation and try to make you feel better. At dinner, he made a comment about the games. His words rang through your mind. “Even if you don’t win, just try not to be killed first.”

It makes your blood boil just thinking about it. You’re appalled by his insensitivity. You know those people aren’t any less smart or skilled as anyone else in that arena. Just because Finnick was the one to kill them off, doesn’t make them any weaker.

District four. Your home, family, friends, everyone you love is there. You can’t imagine not making it home to them. You also can’t believe this just had to be the last year you’re even eligible for the games. The worst luck ever. You groan as you pull the comforter over your body. One of the perks about being a tribute has got to be how well they treat you before you’re sent off to your death. You finally start to drift off into a semi-deep sleep—since real sleep is impossible—when you hear a soft knocking at your door.

You groan again before allowing the person into your room. You watch intently as the figure makes its way further and further towards your bed. You can only assume it’s an avox coming to give you a spa treatment or something else extravagant. But to your surprise, it’s your fatally charming mentor.

“What are you doing here, Finnick? Wanna piss me off some more?” You immediately bark out, not even giving him a chance to look into your eyes. This obviously makes him angry, you can see it on his face.

He bites his lip in frustration. “Listen here, little girl. You should try showing your mentor some respect for a change. I could be the very difference between life and death for you in that arena. I wouldn’t take that for granted if I were you,” his fake smile pierces through your blanket of security. He really knows how to make your spine shiver.

“Here to tell you that we’ll be arriving at 7am tomorrow morning. I suggest you be up and ready before then,” he continues. You watch as he takes a piece of fruit from your nightstand and bites into it. He gives another fake smile and walks out of your room, the automatic door sliding closed behind him. The sound of his voice makes your face grow hot in anger. It’s like everything he says is made to piss you off, but he had a good point. He’s the one who decides what gets sent out. He can help you live or let you die. Maybe you should try and get on his good side.

A good two hours fly by while you lay helplessly trying to grasp onto an ounce of sleep. It’s no use. You’re far too nervous to even close your eyes. The thought of losing everyone creeps into the back of your mind, but you deem the thought selfish. You’re not losing them, they’re losing you. More than they already have. Your mother and sister sitting at home wondering why it was you. Your best friends pondering what life will be like without you. It was your final year.

The good thing about coming from district four was that most oftenly, they were able to form alliances with the main careers, district one and two. Though, you deemed them to be quite arrogant, stuck up, obnoxious.. the list goes on. You were probably the only one in district four that doesn’t wanna prove they can win The Hunger Games.

The boy two doors down from you has been training his whole life for this moment. Technically, it’s illegal to train, but since when does anyone follow the rules when it comes to the games? The little boy whose name was picked at the reaping was only twelve. You thought that maybe they were related, but he just really wanted a chance to win. Foolish. The boy doesn’t know what he’s getting himself into, you think.

When it comes to Finnick, he seems to favor you—which seems peculiar considering the fact you treat him like shit and the boy is nothing but pleasant towards him. You always assume he just acts that way towards the girls, he does seem to be a charmer. Capitol’s prince, some would call him. That warning he gave you earlier, was probably him genuinely trying to be helpful. You find that very hard to believe.

You turn on your side and click on the bedside lamp. The light brightens up the room more than a lamp probably should. The Capitol needs to stop sucking up to us, you think as you sit up and tread off to your bathroom. The bathroom is huge, a big shower that could fit any toiletries you could imagine. There’s a vanity full of makeup and hair products that you have never even seen before in your life. Red velvet robes that look incredibly soft and inviting. Last but not least, it smells of roses. The whole bathroom smells like you just walked into a florist.

You stretch and look at yourself in the huge wall mirror. You don’t look like yourself. Your features seem distorted and different. You know that you really do look the same, but you don’t feel like yourself. It’s definitely the Capitol. You turn on the water in the shower and wait for it to reach your desired temperature. You discard yourself of your clothes, realizing that you had never changed into your pajamas. When you finish undoing your hair and undressing, you step into the hot water.

Ten minutes pass and you’re rinsing some rose scented conditioner out of the ends of your hair. Everything here seems to be rose scented. Do we smell that bad? You laugh to yourself as you step out of the shower and grab onto a towel. You quickly dry off your body and hair, wrapping the towel around your hair and slipping into one of the velvet robes. Soft doesn’t even begin to describe it.

You open the door to your bedroom and begin to walk into it before you realize there’s a figure sitting on your bed. You assume it’s the boy from your district, probably couldn’t sleep either. Wants to talk strategy with you, pretend to be in love or helpless or siblings, or something even more ridiculous. To your surprise, it’s not the tribute boy at all. Quite the opposite.

You take a few steps closer, examining everything you can in the dark before you come to a conclusion. It’s Finnick. His golden-brown curls falling on his forehead paired with his sea green eyes, it’s obvious.

“What are you doing here?” You snarl, earning a laugh on his end.

“Well, you’re very welcoming,” Finnick says in return. He yawns and stretches before completely spreading himself out on your bed. “I went to check on your friend, Caspian, but he was dead asleep. Just thought I’d make sure you're sleeping.”

I knew he had a name. You roll your eyes and give Finnick an annoyed expression. “It’s impossible to sleep knowing I’m about to be sent off to my inevitable death.”

Finnick smiles. It makes you angry. He sits up to look you in the eyes. “It’s stuff like this that makes me think you really do have a chance. Definitely more than your friend down the hall, hate to say it.” He gives a fake disappointed look and it makes you chuckle to yourself.

“I’m not so sure about that,” you say. You slowly approach the bed and sit down beside Finnick despite how wrong it feels. Finnick rolls his eyes and grabs your hand.

“I think you have the drive. If you really wanted it—which you will in the arena—I definitely think you have a good chance of surviving. We’re district four. Make some allies, I know deep down you can push that cold heart and face of yours out of the way.” He gives your hand a squeeze of encouragement.

It makes you think. Just two hours ago you were sulking about losing everyone and everything, when in reality you don’t have to. You breathe out slowly, taking in everything Finnick said. He’s still there, staring at you with his green eyes. For once, his face doesn’t fill you with rage. His voice doesn’t infuriate you. He looks gentle. Compassionate. Charming. Finnick.

“Thanks,” is the only word you can mutter out. He looks at you with an endearing smile and kind eyes. You didn’t think he was capable of being nice. He looks actually sincere for once. Wow.

Finnick stands up and starts to make his way towards the door when your voice cuts through his action. “Finnick—” He turns around to face you, curiosity plastered on his face. He mumbles a quiet ‘hm?’ and you freeze. It’s like your words aren’t yours anymore.

“Will you stay?”

Finnick’s breath hitches in the back of his throat at your words. Immediately, you regret saying it. You want to hide underneath the comforter and never show your face to him ever again. Your face lights up a bright red, and you hope he doesn’t notice this.

A smirk creeps up on Finnick’s face. He doesn’t even give you a straight answer, he just climbs back into bed with you—which in most circumstances is very inappropriate for a mentor to do with a tribute. It’s fine, he’s only twenty.

Finnick wraps his arm around you, it's only then you remember you haven’t put on pajamas yet. You’re laying there in the robe from your bath, and your towel is still wrapped around your hair. You pull the towel off and let your still somewhat wet hair free to fall onto the sides of your face. Finnick looks over at you and gives your shoulder another squeeze of encouragement. Him and his squeezes of encouragement.

You reach around for the remote before finding it and turning on some show you’ve never seen before. In the districts, you only really get Capitol news. It’s definitely nice for a change. You and Finnick watch whatever drama is unfolding on the screen, holding each other as tightly as possibly.

“What’s it like?” You mutter out against Finnick’s shoulder. His head perks up as he registers what you said. He stays quiet, probably because you weren’t specific enough. “As a victor, I mean.”

He takes a deep breath, his eyes closing as if he doesn’t want to tell you. Like it’s some sort of bad news your parents tell you when you’re ten. “It’s not as great as I make it seem.”

Your eyebrows raise. He always makes it seem like he’s living the dream out here. Money, jewels, fame, glory. He has it all. What could possibly be bad about being a victor?

“I want you to win. I really do, and I think you’re very capable of doing so but..” his words catch in the back of his throat. “I don’t want you to go through what I did.”

His expression is cold. He’s not even looking at you anymore, his gaze is fixated on the screen, but you know he’s not watching. It’s like watching him hold back tears with no tears to hold back. This time you give his shoulder a squeeze of encouragement. This makes him smile softly and return his stare towards you.

“It’s wonderful.. now. I do have money and jewels, fame and glory. But nothing in life is free.” His smile fades, and he brushes a piece of your wet hair behind your ear. He is so good at keeping you oblivious. It’s frustrating.

He pulls you in closer, his grip on your shoulder tightens. Your breathing grows faster. You can hear his heart beating in his chest, and it makes yours beat even faster. His hand starts to move towards your hair. He runs his fingers through your slowly, making sure not to tug too hard. Just three hours ago, you could’ve sworn he hated your guts. What is wrong with him?

All you can do is look over at him. You realize he’s staring at you, but he doesn’t look away. The look in his eyes is something to fear, that’s for sure. He has to be zoning out.. But he’s not. He turns his body to face yours, resting his free hand on your side. You’re dumbfounded. Star struck, even. You open your mouth as if to say something, but nothing comes out. Finnick smiles and caresses your jaw with his thumb. This seems oddly intimate, and you have zero experience in being intimate.

You want to pull away. You think. You’re frozen, a slave to his touch. You want to move, but you don’t. His fingertips dance across your hips and jaw. You start to believe he’s playing a trick on you. He wants to see how far you’re willing to go. Well, you’re not a quitter. That’s for sure.

Instead of your typical surprised expression, your face morphs into a confident smirk. You bite your lip hard enough to draw blood, in fact it does. Before you can wipe it away, Finnick presses his lips eagerly against your own. His tongue runs over the drop of blood, tasting the metallic substance mixed with your saliva. Jesus Christ.

His hands pull your face even closer, along with your body. Your robe is becoming loose, you feel the knot slipping slowly. Your hands are entangled in his golden hair, your eyes are closed so tightly. All you can focus on is how good he’s making you feel.

This is definitely wrong on some level, but when he’s touching and kissing you in all the right places, it seems to not matter. His lips begin to move downward. He places soft kisses on your jaw and neck. Once he reaches your collarbones, the kisses get more intense. He starts sucking dark purple hickeys and leaving discreet teeth marks on your fragile skin. He’s eager, but careful. As if your body is a porcelain doll and he’s the only one allowed to hold it. He’s so gentle yet abrasive.

Your muscles tense as you feel his hands travel down your waist and resting on your hips. You know his intentions. He’s not just kissing you in your bed while practically laying on top of you for nothing. He looks up at you, his sea green eyes pleading for you.

“Can I take off your robe?” He says softly. His voice seems safe now. Not infuriating. You give him a nod, but it’s not good enough for him. “I need to hear a yes.”

“Yes,” you say. And with that, he unties your robe in one swift motion. The sides of the robe fall off onto each side of your body, completely revealing everything. Obviously, since you just got out of the shower, there was nothing else underneath. Finnick observes every inch of your body before continuing to attack your chest with kisses.

It makes you smile. He’s so eager to make you feel good, and it makes you forget how you hated him moments before this. You feel his tongue trace the shape of your breasts, slowly making its way to your nipples. You’re quickly reminded just how bare you really are when Finnick licks a stripe up your nipple, his teeth catching on the bud. Your body tenses, and a chill runs down your spine. His hands move to your lower back, making you arch for him. You notice his smile at your helplessness.

You squeeze your legs together in a desperate attempt for any sort of relief. Your mouth drapes open as Finnick continues to tease you. Kissing everywhere, touching everywhere except the place you desire it most. Back to frustrating. You pull his head up by his hair to look him in the eyes. You’re pretty much begging with the look you’re giving, but Finnick still doesn’t think it’s enough.

He places another gentle kiss on your upper thigh, leaving his tongue to linger slightly longer. “Is there something you want, honey?” His voice was condescending yet so sweet to hear.

His words make you squirm, but the grip he has on your hips prevents you from going very far. You attempt to speak but all that escapes is a strangled moan you didn’t know was lurking in your throat. Finnick chuckles against your abdomen, causing your muscles to tense up. You realize quickly that he’s not going to resume his work until you give him an answer.

You roll your eyes at him to hide your embarrassment, like usual. He knows exactly what you want him to do. He knows exactly where you want to be touched. He just wants to hear you say it. “I wanna feel you, Finnick.”

Not good enough. He immediately refutes your statement.

“What do you want to feel, baby?” He places another kiss on your inner thigh. You can feel the throbbing sensation between your legs grow even more prominent when he calls you ‘baby.’ You can’t even form words; he just laughs at your struggling attempt.

“What about..” he begins. His fingers trail down the sides of your waist and stop at your hips. His calloused hands move forward to the front of your thighs, giving them a squeeze for good measure. “My tongue? You seem to be enjoying that so far.”

Fuck yes.

You throw your head back at the proposal. You would be laughing like a maniac if it weren’t for your inability to form words, which once again is not going too great for you. Finnick awaits an answer and the only thing coming out of your mouth is drool and moans.

Luckily, he starts to ease up on you. His hands find their way to your knees, spreading your legs apart as far as you’ll allow him. You feel so exposed in the best way possible. Finnick continues to leave sweet kisses on your inner thighs, teasing you on and on. You physically cannot take it anymore.

You grab Finnick by his hair, once again, and yank him forward. “If you don’t eat me out right now, you may never get the chance to. I would make your choice wisely and quickly.”

His eyes widen at your words, clearly surprised, but not unhappy. His sly smile creeps back onto his face as he licks a stripe between your folds. Your back immediately arches against his tongue. He takes the opportunity to grab the back of your thighs, allowing himself full control of your position.

You don’t resist whatsoever. As soon as his tongue is back inside you, tracing circles around your clit, everything fades away. He flicks his tongue over the same spot and a sharp moan echoes through the room. You come to the conclusion that it’s from you. Finnick chuckles softly. The cool air against your wet heat just makes you feel like you’re floating. And if he can’t tell how much you’re enjoying this by your body’s reaction, he can tell by the look on your face.

Finnick’s tongue continues to work its magic as your hands flail around for something to hold onto it. They end up grabbing onto the pillow and you’re surprised the whole train car can’t hear how loud you’re being. You swear no one else could make you feel this way. His tongue knows exactly where to go and what to do. You feel his hand move closer to your heat and it drives you crazy. His thumb moves slowly towards your clit, rubbing soft circles on it. Meanwhile, his tongue is prodding at your entrance. A loud moan escapes your lips as you attempt to focus on one thing at a time.

“Finn..” you whimper out. He pulls away from in between your legs, a mixture of juices dripping down his chin. He looks up at you, his chest heaving. He looks so good. Something about him looking so fucked out just manages to turn you on. “You look so fucking hot.”

A smile creeps up on his face at your words. He licks his lips and climbs up to meet your face. He places a soft kiss on your lips as a ‘thank you.’ You smile back and take the opportunity to give the obvious bulge in his pants a gentle squeeze. A groan leaves Finnick’s mouth and his hand makes its way back down to your pussy. He slips a finger in between your lips, flicking it over your clit again. Now you’re even.

You squeeze your legs together, making the pressure ten times more intense. You let out a soft whimper that seems to just push Finnick over the edge. He immediately pulls down his grey sweats, revealing his erection underneath a pair of black boxer briefs. You don’t even have to look twice to determine that’s gonna hurt.

You sit up and cross your legs to be face to face with him. You watch as he runs his fingers through his hair trying to determine what he wants to do next. His eyes flick back and forth between you and his dick before coming to a consensus.

“On your knees,” he smiles. You quickly scurry off the bed and onto your knees in front of him. You pull your hair into a tight ponytail and wetten your mouth, a smirk plastering your face. You allow him to pull down his boxers, his erection springing up towards his abdomen. The sight makes you ten times wetter.

You take Finnick’s cock into your hand, giving it a few strokes as beads of precum run down your hand. You can feel him throb in your hand and it makes you let out a small chuckle. He laughs too, not really understanding why.

You give the head a small kitten lick and watch as his face scrunches up in pleasure. You take the tip entirely into your mouth and Finnick lets out a loud groan. His hips begin to move slowly into your mouth. He makes sure not to go too fast or deep in case you can’t take it. You take at least two more inches to assure him you can.

You continue to bob your head up and down as his hips fuck the back of your throat. Whatever you can’t fit in your mouth, you stroke eagerly with the hand that’s not grabbing onto Finnick’s thigh.

Tears well up in your eyes and drool drips down your mouth as he fucks deeper into it. His little groans and whimpers are all the encouragement you need. You just sit back and let him have his way with you, every now and then you hum, sending the most pleasurable vibrations through his body.

You can feel his climax near when his hips start to stutter and his movements become faster and more desperate. You move your hands to rest on his chest, rolling his nipples in between your fingers. This throws him completely over the edge, because quickly after, he’s cumming down your throat. You take him out of your mouth and swallow what’s left of his cum before standing up to give him a sweaty, teary, drooly, cummy kiss. His tongue explores your mouth tasting what remains of his cum and you can see a string of your saliva when the kiss is over.

Despite your incredible blowjob skills, he’s still eager to make you feel as amazing as he possibly can. He moves his hands down to cup your ass, giving it a squeeze of encouragement. You giggle and fall back onto the bed. The satin sheets feel so good underneath your hot skin, and Finnick looks so inviting.

You close your eyes and suddenly he’s gone. You search around for a moment until realizing he’s gone to get condoms. Smart man. Not giving me a choice. When he comes back, he slips on the condom with ease and gives his hand a small squirt of lubricant.

“Don’t think I’ll need much,” he says smirking. “You’re already soaking wet for me. Yes?”

You feel yourself throb in between your legs at his words. He is seriously driving you insane. You watch as he coats his cock with the lubricant and gives himself a couple lazy strokes.

You can’t even think of a response, so instead you just pull him down to kiss you. After a few moments you break the kiss. “Finnick..”

“Don’t wear it out,” he speaks slowly. You just can’t take your eyes off of how big he is. “You’ll be screaming it in a minute.”

You smile at his cocky response. You feel him line-up with your entrance. One of your hands is resting on his bicep, the other is tracing circles on your clit. You let out a soft moan as you feel his tip slowly slipping into you. You don’t understand how he could be this slow. He wants this just as bad as you do, why is he being such a tease?

Instead of pushing deeper, Finnick decides to just use the tip for now. You’re squirming and writhing underneath him, desperate for something more. Every time you look at his face, he looks like he’s in heaven. Finally, he slowly slides more into you. You can feel every vein pulsating inside you. It makes you clench around him, which earns a very strong moan from Finnick’s mouth.

Your thoughts are being clouded with Finnick. Every touch he makes, every breath he breathes. Everything is Finnick. He’s murmuring something under his breath, but you have zero clue what. Probably something along the lines of ‘you’re so fucking hot,’ or ‘I’ve been waiting so long for this.’

You watch as beads of sweat drip off his forehead and onto your stomach. You realize very quickly why he wanted to take it slow. As soon as he tries to push completely into you, he bottoms out. You tense up, surprised by the feeling. Finnick looks at you and back down at his dick once again. By the look on his face, you can tell he is not all the way in.

“Fuck, Finnick. I didn’t realize you were that big!” You groan partially in frustration and partially in pleasure as he rolls his hips in a circular motion. He just smirks in response. Despite the little bump in the road, Finnick continues his shallow thrusts. He’s more careful now, he doesn't want to hurt you and now it’s become very easy to do so. You let out a loud whimper at his movements, angled to hit your g-spot with every little movement. Unfortunately for you, he’s still taking his sweet time.

He can sense your neediness. It’s driving him crazy. He starts to move slightly faster, but he’s still trying to savor the moment. Your back arches whenever he hits your sweet spot, which is pretty often. Your legs start to shake from using them to keep yourself up. Finnick notices and immediately pulls out and picks you up. This takes you by surprise and you flush a bright pink color.

“I wanna make sure you’re comfortable, how do you wanna lay?” His voice is soft and sweet. It’s crazy how fast his tone can switch between dominant and demanding to soft and caring.

You bite your lip and wrap your arms around his neck. “Can I ride you?”

That’s not the answer Finnick was expecting. He nods eagerly and flips the two of you around. Now he’s laying on the bed, and you're sitting on top of him. You line him up with your hole and sink down slowly onto him once again. Once he bottoms out, you start to move your hips in a circle. Finnick’s hands fly to your waist, guiding your movement. He watches as you ride him, tits bouncing directly in his face. He is surely the luckiest man alive.

His groans grow louder and more frequent, and your movements become faster and harder. His hands move to cup your ass, giving it a couple slaps as you bounce on his cock. You clench around him every time and it makes him so horny it hurts.

Finnick flips you over once more, wrapping your legs around his neck. His thrusts are much more powerful now. They’re aiming to hit your spot and it’s so good. His hands are fondling with your tits, pinching your nipples as his thrusts grow faster. His other hand is fixated on your clit, rubbing it just hard enough to make your back arch and leave scratch marks on Finnick’s biceps.

You can hear his breath faltering and his thrusts become sloppy. He’s whispering words to you, but you can’t quite comprehend exactly what he’s saying. Loud moans are leaving your mouth, but you can’t hear anything besides the slaps of your ass against Finnick’s hips, and his groans.

You feel his hand get faster, giving your clit just the right amount of attention it needs to feel your climax bubbling up in your lower stomach. You clench around him in response, and that’s what pushes him over the edge.

He pounds into you relentlessly, hitting your g-spot over and over again until you can’t take it. Your moans have become broken cries as tears flow from your eyes. The only words you can form are ‘Finnick’ and ‘faster.’ It doesn’t take much longer for your orgasm to reach its peak. Your body tightens completely, causing Finnick to release with you. He cums with a loud moan, even though your senses are still clouded from seeing stars, you can assume it was probably a drawn out ‘fuck.’

You pull him closer as his body collapses into yours. You give him another kiss before pulling the used condom off of him and tossing it into the trash bin. He gives you a weak smile as he breathes in your scent.

“You were amazing,” he mumbles against the crook of your neck. You pull the comforter over the two of you and close your eyes.

“You were perfect,” you respond smiling. He gives you another kiss on the cheek since he can’t stand not having his lips on you. The reality of your situation sets in very quickly. You’re about to be in the Hunger Games and you’ve just accidentally fucked your mentor. Accidentally may be a stretch.

You look over at Finnick, somehow putting your emotions aside. You give him a sad smile and place a soft kiss directly onto his lips. It confuses him, but he doesn’t question it. You’re clearly in a vulnerable state and he doesn’t want to pry too much.

You look into his eyes for far too long. The beautiful sea-green color that completely encapsulates the beauty of the ocean. You realize far too late how you really feel about Finnick Odair. The worst part is…

The clock just struck seven.

[miyahchan]

Yuji Itadori x Reader: Protector (Jujutsu Kaisen) (Part 3)

Part 1: https://www.tumblr.com/miyahchan/683632993653407744/yuji-itadori-x-reader-protector-jujutsu-kaisen

Part 2: https://www.tumblr.com/miyahchan/690357281008844800/yuji-itadori-x-reader-protector-jujutsu-kaisen?source=share

Author’s Note: It’s been a super long time since I’ve posted on here and I know this part is wayyyyy overdue. Life and college has been whooping my ass but now I’m finally at a point where I can focus on doing what I like to do :) So here’s part three of the “Protector” series! This part is definitely the longest part so far since it’s more plot heavy.

Synopsis: Yuji finally convinces you to take a trip to see your parents after years of no contact. However, the day takes a turn for both the better and the worst.

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, Toxic Relationship, Disturbing (?) Content, Smut (ofc), Oral Sex (F receiving), Vaginal Penetration, Multiple Orgasms, Creampie, Fingering, Manipulation, Vulgar Language, Alternate Universe, Reader Insert

Word Count: 4k +

Taglist: @lilithlunas @thesunxwentblack @coffee-on-a-rainyautumn @k0rndogz

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

          The drive to the outskirts of the city was a long one, one where you spent the entire time staring out the window and listening to whatever song came on the radio. 

          Yuji drove the entire time – even though you insisted on the two of you taking turns – seemingly enjoying the ride more than you were. He was always the one to find joy in the mundane things in life and, in a way, you envied it. While he seemed content with the situation at hand, you shifted in your seat with every mile that passed by. 

          You weren’t exactly sure how Yuji convinced you to do this.

          You remembered his words from that one night, the night you tried to push to the back of your brain: “Your parents hated you, you were all alone, and your life was just one screw up after another!”

          Those words only made this situation even more ironic, especially considering Yuji’s sudden change of opinion regarding your parents.

          “Seeing your parents again might help you get over everything in the past. And I’ll be there to support you, so you don’t have to worry about anything.” Was what Yuji said a few days ago and, while you did find the switch up odd, you chalked up his past remarks to pure desperation at the thought of you leaving him.

          That’s how you found yourself here, on a road trip to go visit your parents. 

          You arrived at the motel first; it was a shady place on the side of the road, but the two of you figured it would do for one night. You two checked in and Yuji brought the luggage in, like the true gentleman he was.

          You remained quiet, finding yourself stuck as you sit on the edge of the crusty bed. Of course, your boyfriend noticed your disposition.

          “Are you okay?” Yuji dropped a suitcase at the foot of the bed and took a seat beside you.

          Instinctively, you rested your head on his shoulder and let out a huff. “What if we just turned back around?”

          “It’s a little too late for that, don’t you think?”

          “We could go back to my place, cuddle up and watch a movie, and… other things.” Your mind wandered to a scenario that was much better than the one you two were currently in.

          Yuji hummed. “While I would love nothing more than to be cuddled up with you right now, I would just be helping you run away from your problems.”

          “Well, technically, we’re running to my problems.” You got up and started pacing back and forth in the room. “I don’t even understand why I have to do this.” 

          Yuji just watched you pace, not wanting to add to your distress. “If we’re going to be together for the rest of our lives, we should get rid of our baggage. I don’t want you stressing about your family situation forever.” 

          Now that you thought about it, you never knew anything about Yuji’s past. You figured he wasn’t close to his parents since he never mentioned them, but he’d never mentioned anything about who he was before he met you. It was like Yuji just appeared one day, crafted specifically for you. You figured he was right about this situation though, like he always was. You had to face your fears, even if those fears caused you years and years of trauma.

          The 30-minute drive to your childhood home felt like 30 hours and your dread only grew when you finally pulled into the front yard. In front of you was a blue, country home surrounded by an acre of land. A beat-up truck – one that you instantly recognized as your father’s – was parked in front of the house also. Everything was exactly how you remembered it, down to the dirty white fence that surrounded the house and even the tire swing on the tree in the front yard that laid unused for years.

          Yuji got out of the car first and you followed begrudgingly, all the way to the front door that you had to force yourself to knock on. You prayed that no one opened the door, that no one was even home, but that prayer fell on deaf ears when the door slowly creaked open and revealed a familiar face – your mother.

          Like the house, your mother looked the exact same as you remembered, though a bit more aged. She looked just like you, down to the eyes and the hair, like you’d walked through a time machine and got transported a few decades into the future. She was the first one to break the silence between the three of you.

          “(Y/N)?” Her voice was soft, a tone that felt so foreign to your ears. 

          You weren’t exactly sure what to say, so you squeaked out a mere, “Hi… mom.” But you weren’t expecting to be pulled into your mom’s sweater as she engulfed you in a hug. You were stiff at first, but you let go and let yourself melt into her touch. 

          “Come in. Your dad’s gonna be so happy to see you.” She murmured into your hair and, before you knew it, you and Yuji were being escorted into the house.

          The house seemed cozier than you remembered. It was adorned in warm tones of brown and as you walked through the living room, the couch was littered with cozy blankets and the walls were decorated with framed photos, a few of them being some pictures of you growing up. Yuji trailed closely behind you with an almost childlike fascination, his brown eyes taking in every detail of your childhood home. It was an intimate experience, to say the least, letting him dive headfirst into your past.

          Your mother brought you two into the dining room before leaving you two alone and wandering off to another part of the house. A faint smell of meat wafted in from the kitchen, and you remembered how hungry you were from the long drive there.

          “So,” You looked at Yuji, who was still taking in the environment. “How are you feeling?”

          “I think I’m supposed to be asking you that.” Yuji leaned closer to you. “How are you feeling?”

          “I feel… good, I guess.” That wasn’t necessarily a lie. Seeing your mother was nice and being back here was even nicer, but you couldn’t get rid of the nauseating feeling in the pit of your stomach. While your brain attempted to forget all the things you went through here, your body made sure you remembered. “It’s so much different than I remember, though. Mom used to hate decorating, but now she’s made the place her own.” Your eyes scanned all the knick-knacks that she had placed on the shelves, and you wondered why everything changed after you left. 

          Before you could entertain that thought, the sound of footsteps on the wooden floors echoed through the house –two pairs of footsteps, to be exact. Your mother entered the room, followed by someone else – your father.

          Your father, like your mother, looked the same as you remembered. You didn’t resemble your dad at all, though you did pick up your more reserved, independent nature from him. You didn’t have many memories with your dad, as he spent most of his time working, a trait that you inherited as well. 

          “(Y/N).” Was all he said before he focused his attention on Yuji. “You brought a guest.”

          You realized you hadn’t properly introduced Yuji to your parents and figured this was the perfect time to do so. “Yeah, um, this is Yuji, my boyfriend.”

          “Nice to meet you two.” Yuji reached out to shake your dad’s hand, which your dad surprisingly accepted. Perfect, you thought, work your charm.

          Your dad took a seat at the head of the table and your mom excused herself to the kitchen. “So, how long have you two been dating?” You never imagined that you’d be in a situation where your father would be interrogating your boyfriend, but here you were.

          “We’ve been together for almost 10 months.” Yuji took initiative in the conversation. “She’s a great girl.”

          Your father let out a grunt of approval and, though you expected more questioning, he didn’t continue. It was odd. Your mother ran back and forth between the dining room and the kitchen, bringing in plates, silverware, and, finally, pots of food.

          “I wasn’t expecting company today but thankfully, this should be enough.” She went around the table, fixing everyone their own portion of food. She’d made pot roast and mashed potatoes, one of your favorite meals coincidentally. 

          Yuji dug into his meal before you could even pick up your fork. You couldn’t remember the last time you had a homecooked meal like this, especially from your mom. Dinner began with everyone eating in silence except for the sound of clinking silverware. Mom’s pot roast melted on your tongue, and you let out a sigh. This was nice.

          “So, how was the ride?” Your mother asked, taking the tiniest nibbles from her plate.

          “It was nice.” You hated small talk.

          “I’ve never been out the city before so it was a pretty cool experience.” Yuji, on the other hand, was a master at it. “I’ve seen more trees today than I’ve seen in my whole life.” He rambled on. Your mother giggled at his response and your father only stared him down.

          “Never took my daughter for the city type.” You heard your dad mutter. 

          Like you would know anything about me, you thought. “I love the city. You get tired of grass and bugs, y’know?” You rubbed it in, and you felt even more gratified when your father only cut his eyes at you with no rebuttal. 

          “You did always have big dreams.” Your mother said. “I’m sure you’ve been making them come true out there, haven’t you?”

          “Well, I’m a nurse now. It was a hard road with school and everything, but I did it.” You glanced at Yuji, who stared at you with adoring eyes. You could be talking about yourself all day and his admiration wouldn’t waver.

          “Nursing?” For a second, shock was spread across your mother’s face. If you blinked, you would’ve missed it. To be fair, a lot of people who faced the things you faced in this house wouldn’t be in such a good position, but you worked hard, even if that hard work was driven by hatred for your parents. Though, as much as the hatred for your parents had been burning in your soul for years, in their presence now, you couldn’t find it.

          By the time dinner wrapped up, the sun was starting to set in the sky and everyone dispersed from the dining table. While your parents stayed in the kitchen, you had Yuji by the hand as you took him room to room. You showed him the room with the grand piano that your parents wanted you to learn so bad, the backyard where you used to have chickens until they escaped from their pen and ran away, and finally, the two of you went upstairs and you opened the door to your childhood bedroom.

          It was exactly how you left it all those years ago, though it had clearly been cleaned up, making you wonder who was spending time in it after you left. For a teenager, your room had been surprisingly bare. There were no posters, no artwork, not even curtains on the windows. There was just a bed, a tv stand, and a rigid bookcase with books that you didn’t even remember reading. You’d begged your parents to let you design your room the way you wanted to, but they were always too busy to accommodate you. And, after walking through a house decorated from top to bottom, seeing your drab room was a slap in the face.

          “I can’t believe this is where I spent all my time growing up.” You sighed, letting yourself crash onto the mattress. At least your bed was comfortable. Yuji crashed beside you and let out a yawn.

          “Yeah, this country stuff kinda sucks.”

          You laughed. “That’s not what you told my parents.”

          He laughed along with you. “I wanted your parents to like me, ok?” He propped himself up on his elbow. “But I’m enjoying myself. Sure, it’s a lot of bugs and it stinks a little, but I like seeing where you grew up.”

          “Well, next time we go on a trip, we’re visiting your parents.”

          Yuji paused for a second, and you feared that you accidentally hit a sensitive spot in him, but he returned to his normal, happy demeanor and, instead, placed a kiss on your lips. “Whatever you say.” He whispered against your lips. He tried to pull away, but you cradled his face and brought him in for another kiss. You then placed your hand on his chest and pushed him onto his back and then straddled him. It felt great having someone as strong and built as Yuji under you, letting you do whatever you wanted.

          You slipped your tongue into his mouth with little resistance and the kiss grew even more passionate. You felt yourself start to grind against Yuji, almost against your will, and his hands gripped your hips, only encouraging your movements. You felt him harden beneath you, and this only spurred you on.

          Finally, he was able to pull away and he groaned. “Are you sure you wanna do this? Here?”

          “We can be quick.” You punctuated it with a slow roll of your hips and Yuji’s eyes rolled back. “I promise.”

          “Fine. Just… let me touch you.” He peeled your shirt off your torso, and then your bra was next. He fondled your breasts, using his thumbs to rub circles over your perky nipples. You let out a soft sigh at these little movements, but your sighs turned into moans when he latched his mouth onto them, sucking and licking at the soft flesh. He flipped you over, pinning you underneath his body as he continues his assault on your chest. Your panties were getting wetter by the second, and your prayers were answered when his mouth traveled down your torso and to the edge of your pants.

          Your pants were the next to go and soon, Yuji was face to face with your clothed pussy, your wetness already soaking through your panties and leaving a sticky stain. Yuji’s eyes went dark as he licked a stripe up the fabric, teasing both you and him. You knew he wanted to dig right in, but he held himself back. He kissed your clit through the cloth, his eyes staying on you as you whined and writhed around on the sheets.

          “Baby… please…” You breathed out, wanting – no, needing – more. 

          Yuji slid your panties to the side and dipped his tongue between your folds. You let out a yelp and then clamped a hand over your mouth, muffling the moans that spilled out as Yuji finally gave you what you needed. His tongue slid up to and over your clit, lavishing it with slow, purposeful licks. 

          Oh god…

          He threw your legs over his broad shoulders and his hands stilled your shaking legs, gripping your thighs so tight that you knew he would leave bruises. He alternated between licks on your clit and capturing it between his lips and giving it a harsh suck, both of which had you seeing stars. Your words and moans turned into an incoherent mess, and you pressed your hand even harder onto your face, so hard that you feared you would accidentally suffocate yourself. Yuji released one of your thighs and brought his hand between your legs. He slipped a finger into your pussy and then a second when you grinded against his mouth. The hand that covered your mouth shot down to grip his pink hair as you felt pleasure building up within you. His mouth working on your clit and his fingers rubbing against your g-spot was enough to push you over the edge.

          You came all over his mouth and fingers, your body shuddering as the overwhelming feeling of pleasure took over it. You didn’t know what noise escaped from your mouth but you felt Yuji rush to smash his lips against yours with a light chuckle. “We have to be quiet, remember?” He whispered. You didn’t even respond – you only closed your eyes and let yourself relax in Yuji’s hold. He cradled the back of your head as he kissed you passionately. “You taste so good…” He hummed, and he slipped his tongue between your lips to let you taste yourself.

          Your eyes fluttered open as you felt your legs being thrown back over your boyfriend’s shoulders and you let out a gasp as you felt Yuji’s dick slide into you. You were surprised every time – he was so huge, but a perfect fit at the same time. You let out a breathy moan as he pulled all the way out and then filled you up again. This position lets him hit the perfect spot effortlessly, and you let out pitiful whimpers as he makes love to you. 

          He folded you in half as he leaned down to capture your lips yet again, swallowing your moans, and when you arched your back, he bullied himself deeper inside of you. At this point, your mind was numb and your body was on fire. Every touch made your body go crazy but, as overwhelming as it was, you couldn’t get enough. He fucks you faster, making the bed creak beneath your weight, but the thought of getting caught is pushed to the back of your brain. His tip prods at your g-spot with every thrust and, with a particularly hard one, you find yourself falling apart yet again. You creamed all over his dick as another orgasm overcame you, your toes curling and your thighs shaking underneath his firm grasp. 

          Yuji comes right after you, the feeling of your pussy twitching around him pushing him to his limit. A harsh breath escapes him as he fills you up, so much that his cum seeps out from your pussy and ends up on the thin sheets beneath you. He leans down and plants soft kisses on your neck as you both come down from your high, and your hand travels to fiddle with the pink hair on his nape. 

          You really didn’t want this moment to end.

          After tossing your clothes back on and sneaking back downstairs like nothing happened, the rest of the night goes relatively well. Everyone ended up in the living room, where your mother whipped out some photo albums and passed them around, and your father even made conversation with Yuji and they talked about typical guy stuff that didn’t interest you in the slightest. You couldn’t imagine the last time that you had talked to your parents without yelling or fussing – maybe right before you turned 15 – but this was nice. 

          Nighttime came quickly and as you and Yuji prepared to leave, you felt a hand wrap around your arm and you turned only to see your mother. “Just a minute of your time before you go?” She asks. You turn to Yuji, who is preoccupied talking to your father, then turn back to your mother and, with a simple nod, you’re following her to the foyer.

          “I’m so glad you came to see us.” She speaks so low that she’s almost whispering.

          “I’m… glad I came. Really.” You rub the back of your neck awkwardly, but before you can react, she’s hugging you for the second time that night. She smells sweet and citrusy, like a perfectly ripe tangerine. It reminded you of summertime as a kid, when you would run around in the backyard and entertain yourself for hours on end.

          “I’m so sorry.” She whispers into your ear.

          The words catch you off guard and you stiffen up.

          She takes a wavering breath and you feel a wetness on your shoulder. Was she-?

          “I didn’t mean to push you away. We didn’t.” Her voice shakes and you feel your eyes begin to sting. You bury your face on the sleeve of her dress. “I didn’t realize how much we messed up until you were gone.” She continues. “This house is empty without you here. We need you here.” 

          The material of her dress muffles your soft cries. “I… I forgive you.” You breathe and then take another sharp breath. You didn’t realize how much you needed to hear those words until now, and the words hit you hard. Your mind went back to the little kid who only wanted her mommy, and the teenager who hoped her parents would beg her to stay instead of leave. “I forgive you, okay?” All the years of arguing and butting heads didn’t exist in that moment – all you wanted was your mom and dad.

          The ride back to the motel with Yuji was quiet and the silence remained all the way to bedtime. He was already in bed when you joined him, slipping under the cheap sheets and immediately snuggling up to his muscular frame. He didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around you and pull you closer.

          “So, how did you like it? Today, I mean.” His voice is lower than usual, and you know he’s about to fall asleep soon.

          “It was better than I expected.” You said. Yuji lets out a soft “mhm”, urging you to continue. “But I need to talk to you about something.”

          “I’m all ears.” His response was slow. 

          “So, I talked to my mom before we left. She apologized for everything, which is crazy to me. She cried. I cried. The whole shebang.”

          “I figured.” He shifts under you. “The two of you wander off and then come back with puffy eyes. I knew something had to happen.” He kisses your forehead. “That’s great though, babe.”

          You let out a huff. “That’s not it.” You sit up to look Yuji face to face. His eyes are half closed, but they’re still focused on you. “She said they need me there and… I’m not sure how to feel. What if I…” You pause for a moment and then shake your head. “Never mind.”

          “No, tell me.”

          You take a moment to process your thoughts. “What if I moved closer to them? So I could see them more often? I know it sounds crazy but I felt so good about today.” 

          At this, Yuji is silent, and you think he finally succumbed to his sleepiness. Then, he speaks. “You would uproot your entire life and move out here?” Oddly enough, his tone isn’t judgmental, but genuinely curious.

          “Honestly, I’m thinking about it.” You admit.

          “I know it’s not about me, but what about us? We’d have to do long distance. I’d barely get to see you.”

          “It’s not that long of a distance.” With every second that you entertain the thought of moving closer to home, the better the plan sounds. “I think we could do it.”

          Silence fills the room yet again, and you prepare yourself for a rebuttal from your boyfriend. But, instead, he mutters, “Whatever makes you happy. We’ll figure it out.” 

          You can’t stop yourself from kissing him in the dark and when you hear his breath become heavy, you know he’s asleep. You crawl off him and rest on your own stiff pillow before sleep overtakes you as well.

          Yuji woke up that night at 3 in the morning, drenched in a cold sweat. He didn’t know what woke him up, but he felt restless, despite falling asleep fairly quick earlier. He glanced at you. Your sleeping frame rose up and down with every soft breath you took, and your barely audible snores were the only thing to be heard in the motel room. Even in your sleep, you were perfect. 

          He remembered the conversation before he fell asleep. He remembered the joy laced in your voice as you revealed your plan to move back home. He remembered the way you dismissed his feelings toward it. He remembered how he held back on how he really felt, and just went along with it.

          How could you jeopardize your relationship for your parents? Parents that didn’t want a relationship with you? Parents that didn’t bother to make amends until you showed up at their door?

          He regretted bringing you there and, while he acknowledged that it might be irrational, he was angry that you would be so willing to throw him away for them. 

          Yuji didn’t know why he threw on his clothes and snuck out the motel room. He didn’t know why he cranked up the car and drove back to the farmhouse. And he didn’t know why he popped open his trunk and pulled out a crowbar before sneaking around the house and slipping inside through a window that was oh-so-carelessly left open. 

          The house was entirely different, now adorned with shadows and moonlight that slipped in through the windows. Yuji was careful with his steps, remembering how the old floorboards creaked when walked on with too much pressure. He passed through the dining room first, the table that was covered in plates and pots of food now bare and wiped clean, and then he passed through the living room, which was less homely at night, before he tip toed up the stairs.

          The upstairs was quaint compared to downstairs, so your parents’ bedroom was a breeze to find. Yuji pressed his ear against the door and held his breath – an almost comically loud snore could be heard inside, but nothing else that alarmed him. He turned the doorknob and slowly slid the door open. Your parents were statues in the bed, blissfully unaware of his presence. He crept to the side of their bed and stands over your mother. You even sleep the same as her, he notes.

          He raised his crowbar and prepared to strike her, then he lowered it again.

          This felt familiar.

          It was familiar, he remembered. A memory flashed in his brain, but it wasn’t his.

          He stood on the side of a bed, but instead of your mother being the one in bed, it was a little boy. The boy slept peacefully, the covers pulled over his head and the only thing peeking out being strands of pink hair. He looked down at his hands. Well, they weren’t his anymore. Thick black stripes – tattoos, he assumed – circled his wrists and, instead of a crowbar, the hands held a knife, which was already drenched in blood. He knew who these hands belonged to – his father.

          He – no, his father – runs the knife across the bedsheets, over the boy’s sleeping form. The blood stains the sheets as it travels up to the boy’s head and when it reaches it, the hand raises the knife for a second, but it shakes and drops the knife. The knife, thankfully, lands on the floor and there’s no attempt to pick it back up. The boy was spared. His father sits on the floor beside the bed, watching as the boy continues to sleep with no knowledge of the horrors he was almost succumbed to. His father glances at the knife and retrieves it again but he doesn’t turn it on the boy this time.

          The out of body experience comes to an end and Yuji stumbles back as he comes back to reality, and he catches himself before he can crash into the wall. He tries to catch his breath as he looks around. Your parents are still in bed, the crowbar is still in his hand, and he’s still at the farmhouse. Why did that happen? He didn’t remember much about his father, except…

          His grip on the crowbar tightens and he focuses on the task at hand. He had to do this. It was in his blood.

          He raises the crowbar over your mother and, unlike his father, he brings it down.

          The next morning, Yuji wakes up in the motel room. He doesn’t remember how he got there, but he’s glad nonetheless. You’re not in bed, but he hears movement in the bathroom. He’s happy that you’re not there to see him; he doesn’t know how he’s going to look you in your face after last night. 

          He heard your phone ring in the bathroom, and he heard you answer it. Your voice was inaudible through the bathroom door, but he heard you gasp and your tone became serious. He heard you hang up the phone and the door swung open. You stood in the doorway, your face blank.

          “What’s wrong?” Yuji asked.

          You hesitated before saying, “You remember my coworker that stood me up?” 

          Yuji’s face dropped and he felt his heart hammering in his chest. “Yeah, I remember you telling me about him.”

          “Well,” You started putting on your clothes and packing your suitcase. “He got attacked. They’re saying he’s been in a coma for a few days.”

          He… survived? 

          The next sentence you spoke spiked Yuji’s nerves.

          “And…

           He’s asking to talk to me.”

[madschiavelique]

𝐆𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐨𝐧!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐌𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐀𝐔

This au was first talked about on 04/11/2023 with my amazing bestie @sunflowersandsapphires and I thought it could be cute to share these thoughts !! (I'm gonna post several AUs ideas we had and discussed on throughout the months because DAMN the thoughts are delicious)

please note that english is not my first language and that there might be some little grammar mistakes here and there !

word count : 2,2k

We’re all familiar from up close or far of the myth of Medusa, also known as one of the gorgons. People often tend to forget that there were 3 gorgons on this myth : Medusa (of course), but also her sisters Euryale and Stheno. 

To give you a bit of a refresh on the myth of Medusa – just from memories okay, the versions of each myth vary in mythology and this is the one i remember best – she was in love with Poseidon and the god decided at one point to bring her to one of Athena’s temples so that they could make love there, her two sisters helping her getting in. 

The two lovers were taken during the act by Athena herself who cursed the 3 women by making them gorgons, creatures with snake hair (and body too I believe) that could turn to stone anyone that made the mistake of looking at them in the eyes.

So my mind went like “huh, wait a minute you’d have to be able to see to actually turn to stone right ? So what would happen if-” and it all clicked.

I think somehow Athena’s magic on the gorgons would make them prone to often get reached by men that are ill-intended. So who knows, what if reader is one of the gorgon sisters, hum ? 

What if men in the past have tried to come and attack you, what if men in the past successfully killed your two sisters and that you’re now all alone ? What if you lost faith in the possibility of anyone being nice to you, or of anyone not considering you as the monster that you are ?

You lived bitterly, secluded in an area people never walked by in fear of getting attacked by you. You're just so used to people coming to you with the intention of killing you that you expect everything to be a threat. You know better than to be afraid, your powers serve you well enough that you don't have to live in fear.

Until one day, Matt gets lost. He’s never passed through that area before, and the surroundings are so different to his sensitivity. There’s a certain presence, an aura that makes his senses blurry as he walks hesitantly.

Of course, you notice his presence. You’re used to living underground, and the vibrations his footsteps and his stick send through the earth are enough for you to come to the surface. You get out, ready to fight, ready to stare, ready to kill.

He hears you, turning around and simply asking “Hello ?”

But ironically, you’re the one to freeze this time : he is looking in the void, and the usual signs of petrification are not lining up on his body. You frown, and the gut wrenching feeling of fear takes you as much as the weight lifting sensation of relief.

Maybe your powers aren’t working anymore, maybe this is your last moments of torment, maybe you will join your sisters in Hell, maybe you’ll die and get humiliated once more. 

But maybe you’re finally free from your curse, maybe only the snakes remain on your head but you can’t turn anyone to statues anymore : maybe you can finally get out of this situation where you’re all alone.

You just want to make sure though, so you step forward a bit, not entirely in case he tries to attack you by surprise, and ask “Why have you come here ?”

He tilts his head towards the sound of your voice, a curious gleam passing his eyes as his eyes won’t settle on you.

“I’m lost.” he answers.

Now you scoff, thinking it’s another trick to make you fall. You’ve had wise men trying to kill you in the past, using their wits to trap you in enigmas or other stupidities that would bring your downfall. 

“I don’t fall for tricks and traps,” you say as you step closer to him.

He doesn’t seem to step back, nor does he seem afraid, not in the slightest. You tilt your head a bit until your eyes bore into his, making sure your gaze is aligned with his own.

He frowns, tilting his own head to the side, “Tricks and traps ?”

Your eyes go wide and your shoulders fall as the realisation hits you : he’s blind.

The fear dissipates, but gives its place to disappointment. Of course your curse is not lifted, of course the possibility of you going back to a semi-normal life is purely impossible. You step back, looking at him as if discovering him for a second time.

“You’re not here to kill me ?” you question as you cross your arms over your chest.

He’s the one to scoff now, placing both of his hands on his stick.

“Kill you ? Why would I do such a thing ?”

There’s genuine confusion in his tone, but you’re not ready to let your guard down about all of this.

“Don’t play ignorant, you know why.”

“I assure you I don’t.” he answers. 

Now you’re both confused.

You are mostly because it’s the first time your powers don’t act on someone, as well as the first time someone isn’t here to kill you nor is aware of your existence.

As for him, he’d just arrived here because he had lost his way, and now here he was in front of a woman that was claiming he was here to kill her. So who could she be that people came so often here with that purpose only ? 

There was something different about you, your smell indicated a strong presence of wet stone, but of something much different. Something that smelled like warm sand, like diluted metal, like scales of snakes. He wondered if perhaps you had one on you, or if the area had plenty of them he had to beware of.

You couldn’t tell if he knew of the legends, for who knows : maybe your sister’s tale had gone forgotten. If he was aware of your story however, he looked like someone pretty calm about it, which made the word ‘unusual’ turn into a euphemism for your situation.

“You’re simply lost ?” you end up interrogating.

“I never used this passageway before,” he conceded, “I wanted to use it as a shortcut, but I’ve never gone this far away from the places I know by heart.”

You continued looking at him. He was well built, enough that his physique could be considered as one of the many heroes that had tried harming you. Yet the more you looked at him, the less the thought of him being here to cause you pain and kill you faded. He only had a bag, and his walking stick. 

Your silence perplexed him.

“Why would people want to kill you ?” he asked again, pulling you back from your reverie.

The question made you feel weird, because it seemed like such an evidence to you that seeing an alternative to this interrogation seemed impossible on the spot. Why would they not want to kill you ? They had plenty of reasons anyway.

“Doesn’t matter,” you answered on the spot as this being somehow the only thing your could provide as an answer.

“I think it does,” he interjected, and your parted your lips.

In all these years of being a gorgon, never had your had much of a conversation like so. He surely didn’t care about your life, and maybe was this another ruse to lure you in and make you easier to kill.

Guessing how answering these questions wasn’t one of your fortes, he sighed.

“Could you help me find my way back, please ?”

You’re hesitant on the case of his demand. Every man before him had wronged you, had turned against you to try and bring some glory to their pathetically short lives while you remained eternal and undefeated. 

What if it was another trick by Athena ? What if this was her final resort to bring glory to humans ?

And in any case, men had taken away your sisters, how could you not be angry at them and not wish to help them ? 

But this one… He seemed kind, disinterested in any kind of glory in any shape or form, just a blind man lost in your woods.

Not daring to be closer to him or even touching him in case this could ease your way into death, you grabbed the foot of his stick and rose back up.

“Hold on to it,” you mumbled as you started walking towards the next path.

You turned a second to him, a grin plastered on his face. Not a vicious one, to your relief, but a grateful smile.

“Why’s a lady like you all by herself on this desertic passage ?” he questioned, walking at your pace as he tried to make sure by waving his arm in front of him that he wouldn’t be hitting anything.

You weren’t here to make friends with men, but you hadn’t talked to anyone in a while. The sight of him having so much trouble directing himself because of your gauche handling of his stick sent you a wave of pity. You dropped the wood, and he stopped, surprised.

“Already there ?” he asked in surprise.

But you came to him, taking his hand and have it circle your arm so that he could still use his stick.

“Thank you,” he softly smiled as you both started walking again, your mind trying to chase away the way his arm against yours felt. “So, why are you all alone in here ?”

“Because bad men chased me until there was no place other than there for me to live,” which wasn’t far off the mark.

“Exiled ?” he interrogated.

“Feared.” you breathed.

“How could you be feared ?” the question rang wrong to him.

“How could I not,” you almost laugh as your free hand comes to caress the neck of a snake.

“I don’t find you terrifying,” his lips came to form an inverted smile as he rose his eyebrows.

“It’s because you are safe from my unwanted danger.” 

“Am I holding the hand of the most dangerous person to ever be ?” he laughed, the lack of seriousness in his tone making the situation all the more ironic for you.

“You just might,” you answered, a bit less tense than you were seconds ago.

“Well, it pleases me,” he admitted and you stiffened.

Trying to play it cool and not get nervous that this could be your last conversation ever, you asked : 

“To be in danger ?”

His head turned to yours, his gaze still lost somewhere you could never be in.

“To be in good company.”

Your walk with him came to an end, and Matt had by now remembered the way to get to the path. He wished you goodbyes, and you came back to your cave thinking how much of a strange situation it had been. 

He hadn’t tried to kill you on the way, but maybe had an acolyte of some sort of his placed a trap in your cave. You meticulously made your way back to your place, but nothing different was to be found.

What an odd encounter.

And thus he came a second time to you.

“I’ve lost my way again,” he had explained.

“Have you got the memory of a goldfish ?”

But nevertheless, you had accompanied him back again, and had chatted again, and waved goodbyes again.

But still, he kept getting lost, and kept coming back to you for your guidance. 

You had the full conviction by now that he had the worst sense of orientation a man could have ever gotten.

And he had the full conviction that you were not a monster, so he pretended to not know his way although he now knew it by heart just to have an excuse to meet you again and talk to you.

“Seems like I really can’t remember my way anymore.”

“Matt, you always come to me with the exact same path, you know that right-”

“Really can’t remember it anymore, such a shame, looks like you’ll once again have to accompany me.

“It’s the second time you’ve come to see me today.”

Of course he tries to play it off and placing this on his atrocious sense of orientation, but there are some moments where he accidentally lets the cover slip.

“It’s near a huge rock.” you explain again.

“You mean the one shaped like a heart that is about 300 steps from here ?”

“Yes exact- wait a minute, if you know the placement so well, how come you always get lost ?”

“...”

“...?”

“Amnesia has taken me, what were we talking about ?”

“Matt you’ve gotten ‘amnesia’ three times this week. You need to speak to someone about that.

“You shouldn’t worry. Actually I feel like I have most of my sense in your presence lately, your company cures me of my own obliviousness-” he says as he trips over a rock immediately.

And you’re quite oblivious to this, but also the more you understand about this, the least do you complain about it. 

Maybe loneliness started slipping away from you after all.

(I could continue on this au but I have WAY too many others in mind that I want to put out there !!! I'd love to see any of the thoughts you'd have on this au besties <33)

[teaberrii]

Cupid's Match

You've been Cupid for as long as you can remember. You've brought countless soulmates together, yet you've never found love.

When you're assigned to bring two childhood friends back together, it should be simple until you unexpectedly catch feelings for the mysterious and cold Ph.D. student, Dan Heng, the man with a soulmate… the man with answers to your past.

Dan Heng/You

Notes:

Cross-posted on Ao3

Female reader

Chapter index at the end of chapter one

Chapter 1: You’re My Soulmate

You heard a building collapse behind you.

Yet, you kept walking.

An innocent man ran toward you. He stopped and collapsed just as an arrow pierced his heart.

Yet, you kept walking.

You could smell the rotting, burning flesh around you.

Yet, you kept walking.

Suddenly, you felt something stop you; it was the first time you looked down. A young girl was bleeding from the head, her eyes wide and her lips dry.

“...Please,” she whimpered. “...Please help me.”

You lift your foot, shrugging her hand off your blood-stained boot. Then, you raised the spear in your hand. And, as you stared into her eyes, you aimed the spear directly toward her heart.

“Get up!”

You wake with a start. Your heart is pounding; your hands are slightly shaking. Strands of hair cling to the sides of your sweaty neck. You’re still reeling from your nightmare when a small, dark gray and white rabbit wearing a conductor’s outfit walks up to you.

“Another nightmare?”

You look down and see Pom-Pom, your partner-in-crime, looking up at you with his large blue eyes.

You sigh. “Take a guess.”

“Well, maybe this will take your mind off things,” he says as you get out of bed. “You have a new assignment!”

“Oh, goody,” you say dully, slipping on a jacket.

You open the door and see the Milky Way out of one of the windows of the Astral Express, the mysterious train that travels non-stop in outer space. You don't know how you ended up on this train, only known and inhabited by Aeons, who are Gods and Goddesses that embody a specific human trait.

You, of course, are one of them.

You are Cupid—the Desire. The one who’s supposed to believe that love can overcome all obstacles. Yet, you almost roll your eyes at the thought. You don’t know how you got here or why you’re who you are when you don’t really believe in love. But this is your fate. You hope that by bringing couples together, you will figure out who you really are and why you're here.

At least, that's what you're promised.

“Hey, Cupid, long time no see.”

The last person you want to see is Nanook, the God of Destruction, known for his ego. But you're not surprised. The man is shirtless with—dare you say it—a great body. His black pants sit snugly around his waist, and you can clearly see his defined V-line. It's kind of annoying how physically attractive he is. If only his personality can keep up.

“I wish it would stay that way.”

You walk past him, but Nanook suddenly grabs your hand and spins you around.

“Why do you hate me so much? We would match so well.”

"Because when one thinks of love, they think of destruction," you deadpan.

Nanook smirks. “It would certainly be a passionate romance.”

Pom-Pom loudly clears his throat. “She has a job to do, Nanook! Let her go!”

When he doesn’t, you frown. “I’m going to give you three seconds.”

“Or else what?” Nanook challenges. “Himeko can wait.”

“Desire itself is an ugly form,” you say. “It can make people do the wildest, strangest, things. I don't think you'd be able to live with what you'd do if I released that to the world.”

Nanook slightly narrows his eyes and lets you go. Then, he slides a hand into his pocket. “You’re a feisty one.” He dismissively waves his hand. “Our budding friendship can wait.” Pom-Pom climbs onto your shoulder and sticks his tongue out at him. The God points at him and says, “Watch it, rabbit.”

You turn around and continue towards the conductor’s cabin.

Once you arrive, and before you knock on the door, you hear a woman say, “Come in.”

You open the door and see Himeko, the train’s conductor, sitting at a large table. From the outside, one will assume they’re walking into a small compartment, but that’s far from the truth. Planets float above you. The ceiling feels and looks like an endless galaxy. The room is illuminated with floating stars. There's also a light fruity scent in the air.

“You look well," Himeko says.

“Did you call me here to ask about my well-being or because of a job?”

She chuckles. “Cheery as always, I see."

"Oh, of course. Because seeing people get lovey-dovey just fills me with joy."

Pom-Pom pulls at your cheek as if forcing you to smile, and you turn to him with a deadpan look. “Sorry," he says. "I thought I’d help you out.”

Himeko slides a wide envelope toward you. You take it off her desk and open it. They’re profiles of your latest… victims, you like to call them. This time it’s a man and a woman.

“Childhood friends?” Pom-Pom asks, reading their profiles from your shoulder. “This should be easy!”

Childhood friends, huh? As Pom-Pom says, this should be easy. You've dealt with getting two complete strangers together before, and it was exhausting. But it's all part of the job. You'll do anything to complete it, which often includes interfering with their lives. How many human jobs have you worked? How many people did you impersonate? You've lost count.

You take one last look at their profiles. Dan Heng is a Ph.D. student at Xianzhou University, one of the most prestigious universities in the world. His soulmate, Stelle, is a singer-turned-actress.

"I have a little more info on them if you're interested."

You look up and see Himeko looking at you. Then, you slide their profiles inside the envelope. “Enlighten me.”

“They went to a private school,” Himeko says. “But… Dan Heng's family began facing financial difficulties when their business started doing poorly. During that time, they transferred him to a public school, which is also when Stelle left to start her career as a singer. They kept in touch for a little while but drifted apart."

“Well, what about now?”

Himeko smiles. “That’s for you to find out.”

You sigh. “I guess I shouldn’t have gotten my hopes up.”

“Well, good luck.”

A small pause.

"...When will I start getting answers?" you ask. "You promised I would."

"Of course. I am a woman of her word."

You stare at her. She stares back. Guess she isn't going to answer your question.

So, you turn around. As you open the door, she says, "I think you'll find the job a little more... exciting this time."

You look over your shoulder and see Himeko smiling at you. "I'm not doing this for excitement. I want my answers."

And then you're out the door.

“...Do you think we’ll be doing this forever?” Pom-Pom asks as you head toward your room.

“We'd better not.”

That's right. You're abiding by your responsibilities because of Himeko. She'd promised you'll get all the answers you were looking for when she found you. You'd also met Pom-Pom on the Astral Express. He was just as lost as you. Why is he a talking rabbit while everyone else is an Aeon? You aren't sure how you struck up a friendship, but he'd somehow felt that by staying with you, he'll learn something about himself.

“Isn’t that just an excuse because no one else would take you?” you asked.

"How rude!" Pom-Pom huffed. "I want to stay with you because I feel you and I are connected!"

You laughed.

“If you’re going to treat me like this, then—”

You patted his head and smiled. "I'm counting on you, partner."

Pom-Pom sighs. “...But we still don’t have any answers so far."

As soon as you and Pom-Pom arrive in your compartment, he hops onto your bed and makes himself comfortable. You, on the other hand, start packing for another trip to Earth.

“Honestly, I can’t imagine you as anything else but a talking rabbit.”

Pom-Pom immediately stands and puts his paws on either side of his hip. “But I’m not a rabbit!" His ears droop. "I… I can’t be.”

You chuckle. “Right. You’re also a cat, dog—”

“I get it,” he says flatly.

While Pom-Pom’s form on the Astral Express is a rabbit in a conductor’s uniform, his appearance changes when he’s on Earth. Sometimes he’s a cat. Sometimes he’s a dog. At one point, he was even a car. You have to admit it’s a little exciting to see what form he takes on every job.

You swing a bag over your shoulder. “C’mon, partner, we have a job to do.”

Once Pom-Pom climbs into your bag and pokes his head out, you leave your compartment.

“So? Do you have any ideas?” Pom-Pom asks. “You’ve dealt with the silent brooding types before!”

You raise a brow. “Are you talking about Dan Heng?”

“Who else?”

You almost smile. “They can be a pain, but some celebrities aren’t that much better.”

You should know. You had to match one before, and the man was so high maintenance that you almost murdered him in his sleep.

“Who are you talking about?”

You and Pom-Pom face forward and see Idrila, the Goddess of Beauty, who doesn’t have a permanent appearance. Instead, she has a combination of features that different cultures find attractive, and it changes from era to era.

“It’s so nice to see you out and about, Cupid! I was getting worried.”

“You don’t have to worry about her with me around,” Pom-Pom says confidently.

Idrila notices the envelope in your hand. “Himeko has a job for you?”

“Yup.”

“Ooh, can I take a look?”

You hand her the envelope, and she slides out the sheets.

“I must say… the man looks quite charming,” she says. “Fair skin… a defined jawline… oh! And that gaze! He must be quite the ladies’ man.”

Should Stelle consider herself lucky, then?

“Anything else you can tell about him?” you ask.

“I doubt he’s very social.” She slides the papers back inside the envelope and hands it back to you. “Might take a while for him to open up to you.”

"I guess that's a sign for you to approach Stelle first," Pom-Pom says to you.

“Let’s see how it goes."

Idrila chuckles. "Good luck! Oh… but if you get close to him… introduce me."

You raise a brow. “You? Become friends with a human?”

“You’d be breaking the rules,” Pom-Pom says.

“I know you two are an exception but”—she winks at you and Pom-Pom—“rules are meant to be broken.”

When you get to the carriage that acts as instant transportation to Earth, you're surprised to see Lan—the Hunt—standing in front of the door.

He doesn’t turn around when he asks, “A job on Earth?”

“Bingo,” you say. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here. Where are you headed?”

Lan turns around. As usual, you can't see his eyes. Well, you can't see what he is, actually. His form is like a Centaur, except his back legs are like wheels. His form is illuminated by an even mix of purple and blue. If it isn't, no one can tell what he looks like.

“Xianzhou.”

Pom-Pom looks up at him. “What a coincidence! We’re heading there, too!”

The carriage doors open.

Lan gestures for you to go first. “...After you.”

You step into a dimly lit space, where it's full of floating clouds. You turn around just as Lan enters something into the system. Then a familiar, mechanical voice says, "Destination: Xianzhou."

Soon, everything goes black.

The next time you open your eyes, you're standing in a technologically-advanced elevator whizzing to the bottom floor. The windows are glass, allowing you to see the view of Xianzhou City behind you. Tall skyscrapers as far as the eye can see. Trains running in the sky. But it isn't just the view that has you stunned.

Lan—or at least you think it's him—stands beside you as a tall man with long hair and a defined jawline. His eyes have a sharp look to them, and he's wearing glasses. Coupled with the dark dress shirt and pants he's wearing, his appearance almost makes your jaw drop.

“Lan?” you finally say.

“Yes?” he asks, not turning towards you.

“Y-you’re… human!”

Well, he looks like he is. You know that an Aeon's appearance will change when they get to Earth, but you've never seen Lan in this form before… ever. You're the only Aeon whose appearance never changes regardless of where you are. You've always looked human.

He pushes his glasses up from the bridge of his nose. “...And?”

And? And he looks… kinda hot. Not that you'd admit it.

Then, he looks past you. “...I’m not the only one you should be paying attention to.”

That’s when you turn and see another man standing on your other side. His dark hair is slicked back, and he’s wearing what looks like a butler uniform. Is that who you think it is?

He suddenly grabs your shoulders and spins you to face him. You're staring into his blue eyes when he cries, “Cupid! I’m… I’m human!”

Suddenly, the elevators stop and the doors open to reveal a crowd. The silence is almost too loud as they stare at you and Pom-Pom.

Lan lightly clears his throat. “...Well, I’ll see you two around.”

He’s the first to leave. You quickly shrug off Pom-Pom’s grip and exit the elevator. He hurries after you.

You're still not sure where you ended up, but it looks like the building of an institution. There are a lot of people with backpacks. Some are in groups with books and papers scattered on the tables. You assume they're students.

“I can’t believe this!”

You turn to Pom-Pom, who's still marvelling that he took on a human form.

“You’re drawing attention to yourself,” you say, seeing people whisper amongst themselves as they walk past Pom-Pom.

“...Can we stay here forever?”

You give him a deadpan look when you hear, “Oh, there they are! Dan Heng! Gepard! Over here!”

You and Pom-Pom turn toward the voice and see two men walk toward a small group of other people.

“Looks like we hit the jackpot,” Pom-Pom says.

You instantly recognize Dan Heng, but he looks much better in real life than in his photo. He's tall with a slim and lean build. Wearing a white coat with a black turtleneck and pants, he looks like a model.

“Should we jump him?”

“Because that’ll definitely get him to talk to us,” you deadpan.

“Um…” You and Pom-Pom turn around and see a couple of students. “Are you two here for an event?”

An event? What makes them say—

That's when you notice their clothes. They look so well-dressed while you look like you haven't updated your fashion in over a century with your black and white silk robes.

“Can we get a photo with you?”

You and Pom-Pom glance at each other, but you quickly notice Dan Heng is leaving. You can’t let him out of your sight. So, you turn to the students and say, “We’re a bit busy.”

“Aw, but one photo wouldn’t—”

You don’t give Pom-Pom a chance to finish as you drag him away.

You and Pom-Pom discreetly follow Dan Heng and his classmates around while brainstorming ideas of how to approach him. Eventually, you end up in another building where there are a lot of restaurants and stores selling used textbooks, knickknacks, and the like.

"...Maybe we should change into something a little more... appropriate," Pom-Pom says as you and he peeked out at Dan Heng from behind the corner.

You sigh. “Yeah, maybe you’re right.” You happen to see two men look at you and then whisper something to each other.

You never thought the fashion in Xianzhou would be so different. Or, maybe you've been living on the Astral Express for too long, where beings roam shirtless or in random clothes from all different walks of life that no one bats an eye. Regardless, it's not just the students from before who are well-dressed. Everyone looks as if they're about to go on the runway.

You dig into your bag and find some clothes that can work for you but definitely not for Pom-Pom. You never would've guessed he would take a human form, as it's never happened before. Pom-Pom taps your arm and nods toward a nearby store selling university merchandise including sweats and t-shirts.

“I guess that’ll have to do for now,” you say.

“Repping a university I never went to?” Pom-Pom chuckles. “I’m ready.”

You find a washroom nearby and quickly head inside to change into something more… normal looking. However, now you look underdressed and don't know which is worse.

Eventually, you find Pom-Pom in the store with a basket of clothes.

“...Don’t tell me you’re going to get all of that,” you say.

“We have the money!” A small pause. “Right?”

You cross your arms. “We aren’t here to shop, Pom-Pom.”

Then, he looks behind you. “Yeah, you’re right. We’re here for a job.”

You look over your shoulder and see Dan Heng and Gepard walk into the store. Pom-Pom leans forward and whispers, “By the way, the lady at the counter has been eyeing me ever since we got here.”

"...I wonder why."

"Hey, I'm not the only one who looks like I'm someone's servant!"

“I guess we match then," you deadpan.

Pom-Pom clears his throat. “Okay, but listen to this. Maybe… I can convince her to give me a discount.”

“...Convince her how?”

Pom-Pom gestures to himself. “Look at me! I’m devilishly handsome! This has to be my true form. Why not make the most out of it? I can live as a human!”

“...So, are you saying you’re going to flirt your way to a cheaper price?”

“Exactly.”

“That’s not what humans do,” you say. “Not… ones that have a conscience at least.”

“But…”

The rest of Pom-Pom's words fall on deaf ears when you notice that Dan Heng is just a few feet away from Pom-Pom. Suddenly, you grab Pom-Pom's shirt sleeve, making him stop. You nod behind him, and he turns. Then, he looks back at you.

“...What? Don’t tell me you’re going to flirt your way into his life?” he asks quietly.

"Seriously, Pom-Pom?"

“Right. I forgot. The kid has a soulmate already. Well, go work your magic, and I’ll take care of my stuff. How’s that sound?”

“Just don’t go overboard,” you say. “I don’t want our next destination to be the police station.”

Then, you and Pom-Pom go your separate ways.

You’re hoping that Dan Heng will look in your direction when you walk up to him. At least it won’t be as awkward to say hello. But he doesn’t. So, you’re forced to take the initiative.

“Hi.”

It’s safe to say that Dan Heng isn’t normal. He doesn’t even look at you until a moment too long. There’s a calculating look in his eyes when he does.

“...Hi,” you say again. “I’m a student here… and—”

“Why were you following us?”

Did he know? How long did he know? You and Pom-Pom weren't even following him for that long. Maybe it's the clothes. But he didn't even look in your direction—

“I… think you have the wrong person,” you say calmly. “I’m a new student here.”

The indifferent look in his eyes doesn’t change. “You’re a new student?”

You cross your arms. “Yes. Is that a crime?”

A small pause.

"You didn't answer my question. You being a new student has nothing to do with you following us."

"I did answer your question," you challenge. "I wasn't following you. You might've mistaken me for someone else."

He slightly narrows his eyes. "...I know it's you. Your clothes make you stand out."

Did he just diss you... politely?

You smile. "Well, this is a university and not a fashion show, after all. I'd rather dress comfortably."

"...Yet, it seems like you prefer spending time following people rather than studying."

You clench your fists. What is up with this guy?

“Hey, Dan Heng, you ready to go?” Gepard, a man who’s just as tall as Dan Heng with blonde hair, blue eyes, and fair skin, walks up to him. Then, he looks at you. “Who’s this?”

Dan Heng is still looking at you when he says, "...Good question."

"I'm going to go," you say.

As you walk away, you can still feel his stare, which almost makes you bump into Pom-Pom. 

"Oh, Cu—"

"Let's go," you interrupt.

You grab his wrist and continue walking out of the store. Pom-Pom looks over his shoulder and then turns back. Then, he slightly leans down.

"Why is Dan Heng staring at you?" Pom-Pom asks.

"Good question," you mutter.

Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24 Chapter 25 Chapter 26 Chapter 27 Chapter 28

Tag list: @suoshiii @lordbugs @lxry-chxn @seirenspinel @tanspostsblog @theprinceofkhaos

[lady-harrowhark]

Hello! I saw you mention that Pyrrha remembers pre-resurrection, and I totally missed that!! Do you have any theories as to why?

I have a few thoughts!

Just for context - because I didn't catch that on my first read either until I started going back through! - there are a few instances that seem to suggest Pyrrha remembers at least some of her life pre-Resurrection. Off the top of my head, I know there's one point where she refers to G1deon as G--, just like John does. Nona also says that Pyrrha calls her "Hairy Maclary", which is referring to a series of children's books by a New Zealand author. Here's a link to a picture and some info about Hairy Maclary... I can definitely understand why Pyrrha would call Nona that lol. This one's super interesting to me in that it's such a fantastic example of the way Tamsyn uses memes and references so skillfully! In the previous books, most of the references are fairly organic in that they're things that could conceivably be, you know, just things the characters say; the readers catch it (if they also know the reference! otherwise they're fairly unobtrusive) but the characters themselves aren't intentionally making a reference. This would be the things like "You can't just ask someone why they want to be a Lyctor" and "a hunger that only thumbs could satisfy," etc. The exception, though, is John. The "none Houses with left grief" particularly is SO fun from an exposition perspective (but if I start on that one I'll never stop), and then of course we have Commander Wake Me Up Inside. The implication here being that John remembers these specific things and is intentionally making those references within the context of the story. Pulling that same expository trick with Pyrrha sets them up as both remembering... at least to some degree. The hints that we get from Pyrrha are such that it's pretty unclear to what extent she remembers, leaving a lot of room for juicy speculation :)

I initially touched on it over on this post where I rambled about names, memory, and the Eightfold Word, but I'm copying over the Pyrrha-specific paragraph so that you don't have to dig for it:

When assisting with Harrow’s lobotomy, Ianthe tells her, “If you push your brain too hard, any surgery could simply heal over.” And in NtN, Pyrrha tells Palamedes, “You should be draining and replacing her fucking brain fluid... When Gideon and I designed that trial, I used to crack his skull and sieve it myself, just as a control variable... The only other people I put through that damn trial were Mercy and Cris, because only Cris didn’t mind being trepanned on the regular.” I don’t know exactly where the threshold is for pushing one’s brain too hard, but I suspect frequently draining and replacing one’s brain fluid is in that ballpark. Which is to say, it’s very possible that Mercy and Pyrrha (and potentially others) could have healed over from anything John had done to their brains.

Also, I don't know why this didn't occur to me as I was writing up that other post, but when Pyrrha's telling Palamedes about how dangerous their uhhhhh living arrangements are, and how they're risking brain damage... Pyrrha and G1deon were operating under somewhat similar circumstances for thousands of years. Cumulatively, it's possible that G1deon's brain was racking up damage that eventually eroded away whatever John had done. Another thought is that maybe the fact that G1deon died and Pyrrha didn't is at play here.

It could very well be less dramatic than that, though. We don't know much about how Lyctorhood impacts the brain, although to be completely fair, we also can't say for certain how a typical human brain would function after ten thousand years of runtime either. Our brains are constantly wiring new neural pathways and rewiring and revising old ones. After thousands of years, might we be reaching a Ship of Theseus situation with regard to the neural circuitry impacting pre-Res memories? Which is a fancy way of saying, "Maybe it wore off."

It could be all of the above, too. Assuming that Lyctor brains retain plasticity like we see in typical human brains (and I'm not letting myself think too hard on implications either way, because in sci-fi/fantasy make-believe land, neuroscience can be whatever you want it to be), we'd probably see that effect happening with the other Lyctors at roughly the same rate, but at least as far as we can tell (and that wording is intentional because I'm not taking anything off the table with this series), the others don't seem to remember. So that might be contributing, but not sufficient on its own. BUT perhaps ten thousand years of rewiring PLUS ten thousand years of cohabitation PLUS however long of being "trepanned on the regular" PLUS G1deon dying might override John's meddling.

We've still got so many open questions here regardless of what the specific mechanisms are. Like, I'd love to know when Pyrrha started to remember exactly. And did G1deon remember anything, then? It seems like he was Straight Up Not Having a Good Time so if he did remember, he might not have been relying on those memories much. Whatever's going on, I'm sure it's just as bonkers as the rest of the series!

[aerynwrites]

Hey! I have a Tech x Reader request.

Only if you're comfortable with it of course since I know many don't like the topic, but I would like to see:

AZI revealing that the reader is pregnant when they go to SID after Techs fall.

A fix it in which they are all reunited is of course welcome but is not necessary. Choose how you like it :)

I was sitting here hoping for a request like this!!! Bc fuck that ending - that ending doesn’t exists. They are all happy and together and amazing and Cid didn’t do what she did and the empire didn’t come after them and they are all planning to live on Pabu for the rest of their lives okay? Okay cool.

Thanks for the request my friend! Had such a good time writing this! ❤️

Unexpected Endings

Tech x Fem!Reader

A/N: please suspend your disbelief with this one lmao. Didn’t go into the gritty details of how reader saved tech she just did. Happy ending Bc it’s what tech and we deserve lol. Hope y’all enjoy!

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: talks of pregnancy || reader being pregnant || talks of babies/children and raising them || surprise pregnancy || discussions of death/death scare || but mostly fluff , fluff and more fluff!

**apologies for any grammatical errors, wrote this and posted from my phone, also haven’t written in a while…**

The memories come in flashes.

Flashes of emotions and fragmented pictures as you blink in and out of consciousness.

The last solid thing you remember is lunging from the rail car before Tech could fire his blaster. After that…most of it’s a blur.

You remember vaguely shooting your own grapple line into the still attached portion of the rail car, a searing pain in your shoulder as you grasp the tail end of Techs own grapple line, his weight being almost too much for you to hold alone.

You remember the wind whipping around you as the rail car finally speeds away, Wrecker and Omega shouting your names as they try to haul you both to safety.

Then came the screaming of metal, a deafening smash and then, blackness.

A darkness that ebbs and flows but never fully goes away or stays put. You think you hear shouting at one point, your name at another, Techs voice from far away.

Tech.

That stupid idiot!

That’s the first thing you manage to coherently think once consciousness finally decides to grace you with its presence.

When have we ever followed orders?

What would have been his last words replay over and over in your head as you slowly work your eyes open. Trying to gain sense of your bearings.

Your name comes from somewhere to your right, and you want to turn to look at who it is, but a shooting pain in your neck stops you.

“Don’t move.” They tell you, a gentle hand coming to lie on your shoulder. “You and Tech got the worst of it.”

Tech?

“Tech?” You murmur, lips sticking together, mouth parched. “What…? Is he - did I get to him? Is he…?”

The words come out in slurred whispers, your mind moving too fast and your cotton mouth too dry to produce anything louder.

Finally, a familiar tattooed face appears in your line of sight, brows pulled together tightly despite the way the corners of his lips tug upwards.

“He’s alive. Thanks to you.”

You sag with relief, a small breath puffing past your lips as your eyes slips closed.

He’s alive. He’s alive and he’s here, and he’s okay.

“I’m gonna kill him,” you whisper again, opening your eyes just as Hunter lets out a small chuckle, grimacing slightly at the action as he clutches his middle.

“Yeah, well…get in line.”

You want to respond, but Hunter stops you, instead moving to help you sit up.

The movement is awkward, and reveals to you just how extensive your injuries are. There’s a cast on your leg, bandages wrapped tightly around your midsection, and another cast wrapped securely around your wrist.

Hunter is as gentle as he can be when he helps you sit up, stuffing pillows behind you to help support the action, but every little movement causes a wave of pain to wash through you.

Only when you’re situated and Hunter hands you a small cup of water does the pain start to ebb away, leaving behind a dull ache all over.

You look over to the Sergeant, watching as he seems to mull over something.

“Where’s Tech?” You ask, desperate to see him after everything that happened.

Hunter sighs, “He’s in the other room, probably arguing with AZ over his bed rest orders.”

You huff out a small laugh at that, rolling your eyes. “That sounds like him.” You say, fingers fiddling with the cup in your hands. “But he’s…okay, right? I know you said he’s alive, but-“

Hunter cuts you off, reaching over to take the cup from you before placing a reassuring hand over your own.

“He’s fine. Pretty banged up, but nothing a few weeks of healing won’t fix. Same goes for you.”

You nod, finally relaxing back into the pillows. “And everyone else?”

Hunter smiles. “We’re all fine. All of us. Even Omega, who’s been hard pressed to leave your side by the way. The only reason she’s not here now is because Cid convinced her to go out for some Mantell Mix.”

The mention of Omega brings a smile to your face. “Well, I’m just glad to hear that-“

“You’re awake!”

the chipper voice of AZ interrupts you as the familiar silver droid practically flies into the room.

“Hi, AZ,” you greet the droid, unable to stop your smile from growing at the little guy.

“Recognition processing seems to be functioning normally,” the droid says, hovering closer to you as he does other scans. “No signs of significant Brian trauma or bleeds. No progression of spinal injury. Vitals are holding stable. No signs of other internal injuries…”

You sit patiently as the medical droid rattles on for several more minutes, listing off your injuries and what he’s been doing since you’ve been asleep. Hunter has moved to the corner, talking softly into his comm link to who you assume is the rest of the batch. Probably to let them know you’re awake.

“Do you understand?”

AZ’s questions pulls you from your observation and you look back to the droid.

“I’m sorry, could you repeat that again AZ, I wasn’t paying attention.”

The droid nods and points to a data pad he placed in your lap.

“Your care instructions are listed on there. My main recommendation is bed rest and very low activity levels until your spinal injury and concussion have subsided. Drink lots of fluids along with the medications I’ve recommended and you and your baby should be perfectly fine!”

Your eyes snap up to where AZ still hovers, chest frozen as the breath inside you seems to be sucked from your lungs. Frantic eyes dart to where Hunter still stands, his own eyes wide at the droids words.

You finally manage to stutter out just a few words when you suck in uneven breathes.

“Me and my…baby? Baby?”

Kriff…I think I’m going to pass out again.

AZ’s head cocks to the side, an otherwise adorable gesture if he hadn’t just given you life altering news.

“You’re heart rate is elevated and your breathing is erratic. Are you experiencing distress?”

As much as you love AZ, you want nothing more than for him to leave right now. His presence adding to the anxiety spiking within you.

Hunter must sense this, because he’s immediately stepping forward and ushering the droid from the room despite his protests.

Soon he’s by your side again, eyes searching your own.

“You didn’t know?” He asks.

You shake your head, closing your eyes as you force yourself to take steady, even breaths despite the ache it creates in your ribs.

“No, no I - I didn’t think it was - I never…” you trail off, the reality of the situation sinking in.

The burning of tears at the backs of your eyes comes on quicker than you can anticipate and soon you’re trying in vain to blink them away.

Hunter reacts instantly, standing up and moving towards the door. “I’ll get Tech.”

You don’t have time to respond before he’s gone, his presence soon replaced by the man you thought you were going to lose.

He looks just about as good as you do. He’s dressed in his civilian clothing, but you can see the bandages peeking out from beneath the collar of his shirt, and he’s leaning heavily on a makeshift crutch.

And his goggles are missing.

But none of this even matters when his eyes meet yours. He’s on the edge of your bed faster than an injured man should be, your arms wrapped as tightly as you dare around his middle.

All the words you had for him. All your scathing remarks and scoldings and angry names disappear the moment he wraps his arms around you - and you can do nothing but cry as he holds you.

Finally, after several tear filled moments, you manage to speak through your cries.

“Why would you do that?” You ask, pulling away enough so you’re able to see him. “What were you thinking?”

You emphasize the last word with a hard squeeze to his shoulder, lips tugging down into a frown.

Of course, he has a response ready, probably having already said half a dozen times to his squad mates.

“It was the only logical thing to do in order for the rest of the squad to survive.”

You huff, “obviously not, since what I did worked and we’re all alive.”

Techs brows furrow, his own lips thinning before he speaks. “What you did was illogical and reckless. It had less than a five percent chance of being successful-“

You pull away from him then, eyes wide with disbelief. “But it was successful!” You reiterate, “We’re alive because of it. All of us. You were just ready to throw it all away!”

You’re angry now, angry and sad and heartbroken that you almost watch the man you love die, because of fucking statistics. So, before Tech can talk any sense into you, you continue, needing him to know how much his decision hurt.

“You would have died, Tech. You would have died and left me behind. Left us behind…” your hand falls to your stomach instinctively as you trail off.

“It was the only thing that guaranteed your best chance at survival,” He says again, softer this time as he reaches out to take your hand in his own.

You shake your head, “I don’t care, you can’t…you can’t do that again. Ever. Not anymore.”

He looks confused for a moment, before moving to give you what you’re sure is a rebuttal. Some excuse about how the squad as a whole matters more than one member. But you cut him off before he can, squeezing his hand tightly in your own.

“I’m pregnant, Tech.” You tell him, the words shocking him just as they had you.

He’s silent for a long time, his eyes darting from yours to various places around the room before finally landing on you again.

You don’t know what you expect. Part of you, the romantic part of you, hopes for some grand gesture of love. A mind melting kiss, him to jump up and down in joy, a huge smile to spread across his lips as he spins you around.

Yet, the response he gives you is better than all of that combined. Because it’s Tech, and you should have known he would be logical above all else.

“I think I can refrain from any life sacrifices from now on.”

His words, words only Tech would utter at a time like this, bring a watery smile to your lips as you lean in to embrace him once more.

“You aren’t upset?” You ask, voice small from where your face is tucked into his neck.

He holds you tighter, hand running soothingly up and down your back.

“Quite the contrary,” he says, pressing a kiss to your temple. “I never expected for this to be a possibility, so…I’m still processing.”

You can’t help but laugh as you pull away from him, wiping away any stray tears. “That’s normal…I think. I’m still processing too.”

You shake your head, looking down at where your fingers are now laced with his.

“I thought you said clones couldn’t have children.” You say, looking up at him in question.

He shrugs, and you can practically see the gears in his head turning.

“Technically speaking we should not be able to. The Kaminoans engineered all clones to be infertile, for obvious reasons, but…” he trails off for a moment before continuing. “Clone Force 99, we were an experimental batch of clones. Our inhibitor chips were rendered less functional due to our mutations. Perhaps this is similar.”

He reaches quickly for the data pad on your lap, pulling it up closer so he can see as he taps away at the screen.

You smile. “What are you doing?”

“Looking at your medical information regarding your pregnancy. ” He says plainly, pausing his tapping as he seems to find what you’re looking for. “The baby seems to be healthy,” he says, reiterating what AZ had told you. “However, it’s too early to tell much else without more advanced equipment.” He looks up at you, a rare teasing smile on his lips. “AZ estimates that you are approximately two weeks along in gestation.”

You do the math quickly, cheeks reddening at what it adds up to.

“Pabu?” You ask, unable to stop the smile when Tech nods.

Of course that’s when it happened. It was the first time in forever that any of you in the batch were able to have a sense of normalcy. The first time you weren’t running around on missions or saving each other.

It was…peaceful.

Tech starts typing again and you tug him towards you, urging him to sit next to you on the bed as he does whatever it is he’s doing.

“What are you looking at now?” You ask, sinking down in the pillows so you’re able to rest your head against his shoulder.

“I’m searching for articles on how to take care of an infant, as well as searching for nearby space ports where supplies for children are available.”

His tone is so matter-of-fact, so sure, as if he didn’t even think twice about this sudden change in his life. Like he’s accepted it readily and without trouble.

But you have enough worry for the both of you. Something you make known right away.

“Do…do you think we can do it? Raise a kid with what we do?” You worry the blanket between your fingers. “You almost died today Tech. We all came so close, and I…I can’t do this without you.”

The data pad is set aside as soon as you start talking and his hands come up to cup your cheeks before he brings his lips to yours.

It’s not heated or rushed or heavy. No, this kiss is slow and tender and so full of love you have a feeling you know what Tech wants to say before he even speaks.

He pulls away from you slowly, resting his head against your own as he drops his hands to take yours.

“Missions have always been my top priority,” he begins, and you worry about what he will say until he continues. “Just consider this my new mission, and the only one that matters.” He tells you, bringing one hand to rest gently on your stomach.

“I will speak to Hunter about returning to Pabu, as soon as I’m done.” He says, leaning back into his position beside you as he picks up the data pad once more.

You settle in next to him, holding his free hand in yours as you watch him work.

“Done with what, exactly?”

“Research, of course.” He says, bringing your hand up to press a kiss to your knuckles. “I refuse to be unprepared.”

The next few moments follow in relative silence, both of you just relishing in each other's presence. Only Tech’s periodic baby facts and information interrupt the comfortable silence.

When Tech is discussing the various types of cribs and their different sleep functions, you finally interrupt him.

“I love you, Tech.” You say, stopping the man in his tracks.

He smiles, squeezing your hand in his own as he looks down at you.

“And I, you, darling.”

The words are simple. To the point. Just like Tech.

And when he’s back to telling you about cribs and the best baby formula, you have a sense of all being right with the world.

[brookbee]

I know people are either following me because I used to post about Star Trek constantly or because I post about Bowie a lot, so here’s some random David Bowie and Star Trek connections I’ve been collecting for the past year or so. This is purely self-indulgent, but if you find this sort of thing interesting, here you go.

This is from an unpublished interview for Zygote magazine from 1971 where he was discussing the meaning of various songs. The particular song he's talking about here is "The Supermen." In case you don't want to read the full article for context, he mentioned Star Trek to act as a comparison, he was not saying that that was the initial inspiration/meaning.

This ad has song notes that Bowie wrote for the album Hunky Dory. The one of relevance is “Bewlay Brothers,” which is at the bottom of the list. It says, “Another in the series of David Bowie confessions — Star Trek in a Leather Jacket.”

You might be wondering what this means, well Bowie never really gave a consistent answer as to what this song was about. And according to Ken Scott, the producer of the album, Bowie purposefully wrote it to give a song to Americans who were reading too much into things (this was in the era of the Paul McCartney actually died and was replaced conspiracy lol). Bowie did say at different points that it was more or less about his own half-brother, but who knows if he changed his mind about that.

Although as a side note I will say that some of the lyrics sound like they could be describing Star Trek episodes lol

My Life With Bowie: Spider From Mars by Woody Woodmansey (drummer for the Spiders From Mars, Bowie’s band during the Ziggy Stardust era). He’s describing the bar in The Rainbow Room, as they were rehearsing for the most elaborate of the Ziggy Stardust concerts in August of 1972.

Mick Ronson talking about the Ziggy Stardust boots, the clip is from the documentary Beside Bowie: The Mick Ronson Story. Angie, in case people don’t know, was Bowie’s first wife.

Side note about this one though, Bowie compared his own boots to wrestler boots (see image below). But Mick’s shoes weren’t far off from the Star Trek boots.

Book page from Moonage Daydream: The Life and Times of Ziggy Stardust, which was written by David Bowie and photographer Mick Rock.

Bowie in Brussels in 1978 doing (his best attempt at) the Vulcan LLAP salute, photo by Gie Knaeps.

Because I’m me, I’ve been trying to figure out what song he did this during—with certainty I can say it was during the second half of the set after the intermission. That would make it so that they were either songs from Ziggy Stardust or from Station to Station.

My guess (and it really is only a guess) is that it could have been during “TVC15.” When he performed it live he’d often sing “she’s my main creature feature” and sometimes do devil horns with his fingers and whatnot. Seems like a plausible spot, anyhow. The other one is potentially the song “Ziggy Stardust,” but just based on how he usually performed that one, such as where he’d add gestures and how he tended to convey the emotions of the song, I find it more unlikely.

But I wasn’t there and these are literally just guesses. On the off chance someone was there and that they inexplicably remember this, I would love to know.

Gates McFadden, before being Beverley Crusher in Star Trek: The Next Generation, was the choreographer for the film Labyrinth, where of course Bowie played Jareth the Goblin King.

And to avoid possible confusion, she was not the choreographer for "Magic Dance" at least when it came to Bowie's moves, as that was Charles Augin. She was, however, the choreographer for "As The World Falls Down" with the ballroom scene.

Lyrics from one of the Tin Machine albums (Bowie’s band in the late 80s-early 90s, which Bowie wrote most of the lyrics for, minus a few songs).

Additionally Iman, who Bowie met in 1990 and married in 1992, was in Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country as Martia. She was on set filming at least in April of 1991 in LA, as you can see in this filming schedule I found on an auction website. I don’t know how long she was filming for, though.

(Side note, Bowie was in LA at least towards the end of April/beginning May as he talked about how he and Iman saw the riots that happened then. No I’m not saying he visited the set, since for one Shatner says he never met Bowie, but I still think it’s neat he was generally around when she was filming).

And a little snippet from one article (the screenshot is from one of those interview compilation books).

It’s not actually that much in the grand scheme of things and more than anything just shows that Bowie was a fan of the show. It should also be remembered that Star Trek wasn’t ever really cited as a huge influence for him in terms of aesthetic, which is a rather common assumption people make, but I thought that these were fun nonetheless. I’m sure I also missed/forgot stuff, so if I come across more I'll probably add to this later on.

[fourthwingfan]

Madness - Chapter 13

Hi, everybody. I hope you all had a pleasent Easter! Now, we continue our story. Threshing is just starting. It's a really short chapter, I'm sorry, guys. :( But I plan to post the next one on Saturday.

There is nothing quite as humbling, or as awe-inspiring, as witnessing Threshing…for those who live through it anyway.

—Colonel Kaori’s Field Guide to Dragonkind

October first is always Threshing.

Monday, Wednesday, or Sunday, it doesn’t matter where it falls on any given year. On the first of October, the first-year cadets of the Riders Quadrant enter the bowl-shaped forested valley to the southwest of the citadel and pray they come out alive.

I will not die today.

I didn’t bother eating this morning, and I pity Ethan, who’s currently heaving up the contents of his stomach against a tree to my right.

A sword is strapped to my back, the hilt jostling against my spine as I bounce, stretching my arms across my chest one at a time.

“Remember to listen here,” Professor Kaori says from in front of the 147 of us here, tapping his chest. “If a dragon has already selected you, they’ll be calling.” He thumps his chest again. “So pay attention to not just your surroundings but your feelings, and go with them.” He grimaces. “And if your feelings are telling you to go in the other direction…listen to that, too.”

“Which one are you going for?” Liam asks quietly.

“I don’t know.” I shake my head. At this point, Mira knew she wanted to seek out Teine.

“You memorized the cards, right?” He asks, lifting his brows. “So you know what’s out there?”

“Yes. I just don’t feel connected to any of them.” I shrug. “And what about you? Do you have this ‘feeling’?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.” He says. “I thought I felt something.”

“Which one was it?” I smile at him. He totally deserves to be chosen.

“One of the reds.” He grins. “I felt strange when you dated with the greens.”

“Hey! It wasn’t a date. I really thought that I’m done for good.” I narrow my eyes at him.

“Yeah, I shouldn’t have called it a date. I don’t want to upset a certain wingleader.” He winks.

“Liam!” I hiss and elbow him in the ribs.

And he just laughs. God, he’s annoying. A little. But I like him.

We’ve only seen professors this morning, but I know the second- and third-year riders are scattered throughout this valley in order to observe.

„If you go in groups, you’re more likely to be incinerated than bonded,” Professor Kaori argues with someone near the center of the valley. “The scribes have run the statistics. You’re better off on your own.”

“And what if we aren’t chosen by dinner?” a man with a short beard to my left asks.

Looking past him, I catch Jack Barlowe running a finger across his neck at Violet. So original. Then Oren, Rio and Tynan flank his sides.

So much for squad loyalty. It’s everyone for themselves today.

I better watch them. They’re a nasty group.

“If you’re not chosen by nightfall, there’s a problem,” Professor Kaori responds, his thick mustache turned down at the ends. “You’ll be brought out by a professor or senior leadership, so don’t give up and think we’ve forgotten about you.” He checks his pocket watch. “Remember to spread out and use every foot of this valley to your advantage. It’s nine, which means they should be flying in any minute now. The only other words I have for you are ‘good luck.’” He nods, sweeping his gaze over the crowd of us with such intensity that I know he’ll be able to re-create this moment in a projection.

Then he leaves, marching up the hill to our right and disappearing into the trees.

My mind whirls. It’s time. I’ll either leave this forest as a rider…or likely never leave.

“Be careful.” Liam pulls me into a hug and he tightens his arms around me.

“You too.” I squeeze him back and am immediately swept into another pair of arms.

“Don’t die!” Ethan orders.

That’s our only goal as what’s left of our squad separates, each heading in our own direction like we’ve been flung apart by centrifugal motion, at the mercy of a spinning wheel.

***

Guessing by the position of the sun, it’s been at least a couple of hours since the dragons flew overhead, landing in the valley in a succession that sounded like thunder and making the earth shake.

I’ve come across two greens, a brown, four oranges, and—

My heart stumbles and my feet freeze to the forest floor as a red steps into my field of vision, its head just under the canopy of enormous trees.

This is not my dragon. I’m not sure how I know, but I do.

I hold my breath, trying not to make a sound as its head sweeps right, then left, and my gaze plummets to the ground as I bow my head.

For the last hour or so, I’ve seen dragons launch into the air with a cadet—now a rider—on their back, but I’ve also seen more than a couple of plumes of smoke, and I have no desire to be one of those.

The dragon huffs a breath, then continues along its path, its daggertail flicking upward and catching one of the lower-hanging branches. The limb falls to the ground with a monstrous crash, and only after the footsteps recede do I finally raise my head.

I’ve now come across every color of dragon, and none of them has spoken to me or given me the sense of connection we’re reportedly supposed to feel.

My stomach sinks. What if I’m one of the cadets who’s destined to never become a rider? One who’s thrown back time and again to restart first year until eventually something puts me on the death roll? Has this all been for nothing?

I don’t want to die. I don’t want to be useless. I don’t want to be seperated from my friends.

I feel happy with them. For the first time in my life I feel important. And I don’t want to lose them. Liam. Violet. Ethan. Not even Xaden, despite our strange relationship.

The thought is too heavy to carry.

Maybe if I could just see the valley, then I’d get a feeling like Professor Kaori was talking about.

I spot the nearest climbable tree and get to work, scaling branch after branch. Pretty sure the higher branches aren’t going to support my weight, so I stop about three-quarters to the top and survey the immediate area.

There are a few greens in plain sight to my left, standing out against the fall foliage. Oddly enough, this is the one time of year when oranges, browns, and reds have the highest chance of blending in. I watch the trees for movement and spot a couple more directly south, but there’s no pull, no aching need to head in that direction, which probably means those aren’t mine, either.

Relief hits me embarrassingly hard when I count at least half a dozen first-years wandering aimlessly. I shouldn’t be so happy that they haven’t found their dragons, either, but at least I’m not the only one, which gives me hope.

There’s a clearing to the north, and my eyes narrow as a flash, like a mirror, catches the sun.

Or like a golden dragon.

Guess the little feathertail is still out here appeasing its curiosity.

There’s another movement. There’s a woman with wihitis hair. Violet.

Then I spot three man entering the clearing.

Shit. They must be Jack and his group.

I climb down and keep my footsteps silent and race across the forest floor as fast as I can.

I am thankful I grew up playing hide-and-seek with Violet in the woods. This is one area of expertise I can confidently claim.

The clearing is closer than I realized, so I kick up my speed, my gaze darting between the leaf-covered path I’ve chosen and where I think they are.

The meadow is big enough for ten dragons, ringed by several large trees, but the golden one stands alone in the center, in front of the dragon is Violet.

I was right. The group I saw was Jack’s. They surrounded Violet.

Four man against Violet, and a dragon. Probably a baby if based on it’s size.

I feel my anger rising. I will kill them.

I unsheathe my sword but before I can say anything or take a step, I hear a low threatening voice.

„I would strongly recommend you rethink your actions,” a voice—his voice—demands from across the field.

My scalp prickles as each of our heads swivel in his direction.

Xaden is leaning against the tree, his arms folded across his chest, and behind him, watching with narrowed golden eyes, her fangs exposed, is Sgaeyl, his terrifyingly beautiful navy-blue daggertail.

[suzdin]

Mad Max Phillips

(Vampire!Max Phillips x f!reader)

Summary: When trying to deliver a message to Max Phillips doesn’t go according to plan.

Warnings: no use of y/n but use of a nickname/pet name, violence/gore, blood kink, fingering, unprotected p in v (he’s dead it doesn’t matter), squirting, biting (obviously), kind of soft Max at one point

Notes: Basically wanted an excuse to write something about vampires to exercise my knowledge of vampire lore, that’s all really. Enjoy!

18+ MDNI

——

You aren’t sure what compels you to knock on the door to Max’s office. It’s after hours and you should be sitting in traffic by now, chugging down your third or fourth iced coffee of the day, mentally preparing yourself to go to the bar for St. Patrick’s Day celebrations with Alice and Tristan later. Not standing on the fifth floor, where you definitely don’t belong, with some name and phone number scrawled on a post-it note because asshole Max Phillips wouldn’t answer his goddamn phone.

You got the call right as you were about to clock out—a client called ManeGain that sells hair growth products for men. Needed to talk Max Phillips about their account. Fine, you thought. Last one of the day.

Let me direct your call, you’d told the voice on the phone. One moment.

You thought you were home free after that. That is until another call rolled through right as you were slinking into your purse and jacket, fingers hovering over the keyboard to log your hours for the day.

He isn’t answering and I need to talk to him immediately. Please see to it he gets my message, the voice said.

You’re under no obligation to hand deliver messages. Your job is to man the front desk, answer and route phone calls to the appropriate recipients. Direct visitors to the bathroom down the hall. Be a smiling face—or not—as people you barely recognize wash past you and into the building for a long and exhausting 9 to 5 in corporate America.

You had a vague idea of what Max looked like. By and large, he ignored you. As if you weren’t really there. Which was fine by you; the less interaction you had to endure throughout the day, the better.

So you aren’t sure why you’re here, on this empty floor crammed full of cubicles by yourself, hand delivering a message to a man you couldn’t care less about right now. Especially after hearing what sounded like screams as you stepped off the elevator into the hall; and especially after said screams had fallen stagnant and the only other noise audible to you is the crescendo of your own breath as it warbles out of your chest.

You rap your knuckles softly against the door, a lingering sense of dread snaking its way up your spine. “Mr. Phillips? I’m from downstairs. From the lobby? I have a message for you from a Jim Hicks with ManeGain?“

You wait patiently and you’re met with silence so heavy your ears ring. Not even the creak of an office chair or the tapping of fingers on a keyboard can be heard. Perhaps Max has already gone home for the day? You don’t recall seeing him, but it’s possible you missed him in the rush to complete your end of day tasks.

Now that you think about it, you don’t remember seeing him much at all lately.

You could just stick the note to his door and be done with it. After all, it isn’t your job to play delivery person. You’ve done more than is necessary already.

But there’s a persistent intuition rising in your throat that something is off. That something is wrong—you’re sure you’d heard screams. What if Max is hurt? What if you could help him?

The smart thing to do would be to call 911 and vacate yourself back to the safety of the lobby while you wait for emergency services to arrive. But if Max or someone else is injured, they may only have precious few seconds to live, so if you could just check that everything is alright first for your own peace of mind…

As you raise your hand to knock a second time, the door abruptly whooshes open in front of you, an arm shooting forward to hook around your neck and snatch you into the confines of the office, a second hand clapping over your mouth to dampen the horrified yelp that works its way up from your lungs. Your back collides harshly into the door as someone you can’t see spins you, pinning you between themselves and the wood. This all happens within fractions of a second.

At first you think you’ve lost your vision; the room is black as pitch and you can’t even make out the edges of the space around you, much less whoever is inches from your face. Once your vision adjusts, you pick up on the faint blinking glow of a modem against the wall; aside from that, you’re completely blind, your other senses going into overtime.

The first thing you notice is the smell. A thick coppery tang, it almost seems to cake the inside of your nasal passage, overburdening your senses. You think you know what it is—it can’t be though, right? Why would it be?—but you can’t be sure without your sight.

And then you hear something…dripping. Whatever it is, it isn’t far. Few feet, maybe. It seems to be low, which means the source of the sound isn’t coming from the ceiling, where you would suspect. Possibly a desk. Perhaps someone spilled a drink?

Everything happens quickly, within split seconds of one another, and it’s only then you’re acutely aware you’re still being pinned by a faceless assailant, and that whoever it is is breathing against your neck, their breath rife with the same copper stench of the surrounding room. You make a pathetic, mewling sound, your muscles pulled tighter than a snare drum over your trembling frame.

“I can hear the blood coursing through your veins,” murmurs the phantom voice. Then, a dark chuckle. “Fear makes it taste better. Lucky for you, I just fed.”

You feel a shift in your bodies as he manipulates you into a position more advantageous for him, lining his pelvis up with yours. You feel the hard pressure of his erection prodding at your center, dragging your seam through your thin leggings. You relinquish a small sound, one that sounds more gratuitous than you intend it to be, your core throbbing at the sensation in spite of—or perhaps as a consequence of—the spikes of fear and adrenaline currently threading their way through you.

“Did someone like that?” the voice chuckles. You feel the sharp hook of his nose press against the flesh of your neck, skimming along your pulse point. He groans salaciously and rolls his hips against yours, your own utterance of pleasure reverberating your lungs and dying in the meat of the palm still clamped over your mouth. Fuck, this shouldn’t feel good, it shouldn’t, it shouldn’t, but it does—

—it’s the fear, you think. Your mind is trying to help you cope by flooding your body with endorphins. That has to be it. It must be…

“I can smell your blood, sweetheart. Smells so fucking sweet and intoxicating,” he asserts, his tone heady and full of longing. “Never smelled any like yours before. What is your blood type?”

His hand moves away from your mouth, sliding down to circle the underside of your jaw. “Make a sound and I’ll snap your neck like a toothpick,” he warns. Max knows he isn’t above fucking a corpse. Hell, he is a corpse.

You could scream now if you wanted, and you most definitely should. But in spite of yourself, you don’t. You know as well as anyone there’s no one in the building who can save you. And even if there were, they’d never make it in time; the firm press of his hand against your jawbone confirms your suspicion that his threat is anything but idle. You vaguely remember your crisis training and know that compliance is key to survival in hostage situations, if that’s what this is.

“AB negative,” you answer, your voice quavering. Hot tears collecting along the rims of your eyes. “R-rarest… rarest blood type,” you finish.

Max grins and pulls back to study your face. Unlike you, he doesn’t need light to see, his supernatural senses honed now that he’s grown accustomed to using them. He recognizes you as the pretty face from downstairs, the first and last he used to see every work day. Although not so much lately; not since the shift and that pesky allergy to sunlight that would render him to a pile of ash if he tempted it.

“Excellent,” he croons, licking a slow stripe along your neck, simultaneously drunk on the blood in his belly that is making his head swim, and the way he can feel your artery pulsing under his tongue.

“Maybe I’ll have a taste anyway. Always room for dessert, right?” His hand travels from your jaw to the curve of your waist, then to your thigh, where he grabs your leg to hitch it up against him, slinking you around himself so he can deepen the angle of his erection against your core. He needs to be inside you sooner than later, the high of his recent kill making him insatiable.

You let out a sob. It isn’t exactly loud and you hope it isn’t enough to get you killed, but you can’t help it, panic now taking the wheel. A taste of what? Your blood? Does he think he’s a fucking vampire?

You’re definitely the kind of weird girl to believe such things—vampires, aliens, ghosts and the lot. But now that it actually appears to be happening, you’re paralyzed with disbelief, your heart telling you there’s no other logical explanation, but your brain not wanting to accept.

“Shhhh, shhh. Quiet now. I’m going to turn on the light so you can see. And again, you will not make a sound. Right?” he implores.

“R-right,” you mumble, your tongue feeling like a dead lump of flesh in your mouth. “W-won’t make a sound,” you promise.

“That’s a good girl,” he praises, flicking on the switch that you discover is only inches from where your head meets the door, reminding you that you could have turned it on at any point yourself.

You bring a hand up to shield your eyes from the onslaught of luminescence and Max does the same, his eyes far more sensitive than your own. You adjust faster than he does, your gaze already pointed at his chest as your hand lowers, and the first thing you notice is the smattering of blood adorning his suit, staining his white dress shirt. He’s wearing a green tie for Saint Patrick’s Day and you can’t help but think grimly that it looks like some sort of macabre version of Christmas.

Only after you gather your bearings do you allow yourself to look around fully and what you’re met with is nothing short of a horror show. A lifeless man is draped across Max’s desk, both arms displaced from his body, tendrils of sinew dangling gracelessly from the sockets where his arms should be. A gaping chasm decorates his chest which is devoid of a heart as far as you can tell. A smaller but similar impression is found in the stem of the man’s neck, which you deduce is the source of the dripping you heard, the shape and jagged edges of the wound indicative that Max took more than a generous bite out of him.

Rivulets of blood stream down the sides of the desk, collecting in a puddle which is still slowly spreading dark vermillion across the tiled floor. You inhale sharply, your tears flowing freely, thinking to yourself how you’ve never seen this much blood in your entire life. How you may be next.

You will yourself to look at the man’s face. You recognize him from earlier when he’d come up to you in the lobby to ask for directions to Max’s office. His eyes are glazed open in a perpetual loop of his final moments, his jaw slack, mouth ajar in a silent scream. Your stomach turns and you release another sob that you’ve been holding in your chest, but you don’t dare make any other sounds lest Max rips you asunder.

You find one arm on the floor next to the desk, your gaze pulling directly to it. Your eyes search with urgency for the second one, as there are very few places it could possibly be, but you don’t find it on visual inspection alone.

Max forces your visage back to his, black and endless as they scrutinize you. His face is streaked in blood, a goatee of red flowing down from his curved lips, which is splayed into a tilted smirk. You sniffle, your chest shuddering with effort as you attempt to collect your breath and your faculties.

“He wanted to pull his account from our company,” Max explains with a shrug, waving a hand dismissively. “There were some…choice words exchanged. Things escalated. I was hungry. It worked out.”

Max drags you backwards, twirling you toward the wall opposite the door as he releases you, turning the lock behind him. You swallow, dread hammering hard in your chest, doing all you can to regulate your pulse rate but easily failing, pinpricks of sweat breaking out on your skin.

You’ll make it through this. You’ll make it out alive. You won’t end up another meal for this… vampire, incubus, deranged cannibal. Whatever he is.

He steps forward, slipping out of his jacket and waistcoat, discarding them in the bin in the corner. They’re ruined, anyway.

“Fear makes…everything better,” Max intones, giving you a cursory once over as he licks his lips. “On both sides.”

He begins rolling up his sleeves on each arm, pinning them at the elbow, revealing a twin set of thick, toned forearms. His tie is last, which he removes deftly, stepping closer to you to loop it around your neck. You shrink away, or try to, your backside bumping against a cabinet. Max laughs when he effectively corners you again, your mingled scents driving him to madness, threatening to turn him into some sort of savage beast; he can smell the fear being excreted from your adrenal gland, the heady arousal pooling amid your thighs, the invigorating scent of blood pulsing in your veins. It’s enough to make any vampire crazy.

He cinches the tie around your neck, wrapping the other end around his fist. He knows he could use his mind control powers to will you into submission, but there’s no sport in that. No challenge. He prefers when it feels more like a game of cat and mouse and so far, you were being plenty acquiescent, stunned into submission like a timid little dormouse. He can’t help but wonder what you’d let him do to you. How far you would go.

He pulls you against him using the necktie for leverage, causing you to stumble into his chest. He can feel how hard your nipples are underneath your green blouse. You hate how much your body is betraying you right now.

“Taste,” Max quietly commands, lifting his fingers to your lips, the digits still slick with the drying blood of his victim. You whimper and shake your head, tilting away from him.

“N-no, please,” you beg. “Anything but that.”

“Anything? That’s a dangerous proposition, dollface,” Max tuts, smirking crookedly.

“I don’t think I c-can,” you reiterate, shaking like a leaf in his grasp. “I can’t.”

“Sure you can. It’s easy. And it tastes fucking amazing.” He places his fingers against your soft lips. “Open. Now.”

You ultimately resign yourself, knowing you shouldn’t fight him. You’ve seen what he can do—did do—the last thing you need is to antagonize him further. Your lips part softly for him and his fingers delve into your mouth, pressing down against your tongue.

You note the distinct coppery tang of blood right away and it makes you gag, sending you into an inadvertent coughing fit, your own hands pushing Max’s away before you’re aware you’re even doing so, more tears crowding your eyes. If it was your own blood or Max’s, you’re sure you could handle it. But knowing where it came from is enough to make you want to wretch. And you almost do.

Max chuckles, shaking his head at how easily you succumb to your pathetic human morals. “Not good?” he asks.

“Tastes like…rusty pennies,” you spit, swiping at your tongue in anguish to get the taste out of your mouth. In your peripheral, you can almost see the dead man’s eyes watching you. Rightfully judging you.

Max grins, musing over how easily he can make you fall apart, but satisfied that he got you to try, which is good enough for him. For now, at least. “Suit yourself. More for me,” he says with a flourish of his shoulders, licking the remnants of blood from his fingers. “Tastes like the best fucking drink I’ve ever had. I bet you taste even better, though.”

He’s pushing into you again, tightening the tie a few more inches until it’s just barely flush against your throat. His words go straight to your core, his nostrils flaring when he smells more arousal creeping into your panties.

His hand coils tighter around the other end of the necktie, a wry grin playing on his features. He studies you, memorizing all the different shades of your eyes; the curvature of your lips, of your soft cheeks. “I should make you my pet. Would you like that? Being a pet for a vampire?” he asks, his free hand cupping your cheek. “I would like that.”

You attempt a nod. You don’t dare say no. Part of you thinks you would like it, though. But the killing? The constant slew of bodies? You aren’t sure you could get used to that.

“That’s what I thought,” Max muses with a small puff of air from his lips, his opposite hand traversing the curves of your body at a agonizingly leisurely pace.

His hand finds your sex, fingers stroking along your folds through the cloth of your leggings. He can feel you’re soaked through already. His mouth dips to your neck, tongue trailing your pulse point, eager to taste you, but allotting you ample time to get used to the feeling of him there. His teeth tease across your pebbled skin, but he doesn’t clamp down yet, his vampire canines still tucked away for now.

He notices the way your muscles tense and your heart flutters each time his teeth graze, anticipating being bitten, being fed on. He wishes he hadn’t already gorged himself on some jerkoff right before you showed yourself at his door—you would have made a far more delicious meal than this guy. Not that he would have given you the same treatment. Unlike the corpse still cooling on his desk, he’d rather keep you around for future feedings and other forays.

“My pet likes this, doesn’t she?” he coos, nipping at the delicate intersection of your neck and shoulder with his human teeth, causing you to jump. He chuckles. “Relax, baby.”

There’s a sudden tight pull in your lungs, an inexplicable rush of air, and you start to panic when it feels like you can’t breathe, the oxygen punched out of your lungs. Everything goes static and you almost black out, the edges of the room slowly blotting away but then quickly coming back into focus, and you feel an inexplicable chill roll up your spine as a blast of cold air stings your skin.

There are two fingers tapping at your entrance and you look down in time to see Max’s thick digits sinking deep into you, all the way down to the meat of his hand. It occurs to you that you’re completely naked, your clothes discarded into a hasty pile on the floor. You look at Max with a quizzical expression, but before he can answer, your head is rolling back to brush the wall as he furls said fingers inside of you, slowly pumping, a moan departing your lips.

“Super speed. Comes in handy sometimes,” Max explains with a low chortle. “You get used to it.”

If there were any doubts before that Max could be a vampire, you definitely have none now. Unless you’re going insane, which is a very real possibility at this point, there is no other logical explanation for how expeditiously he was able to get you undressed.

He continues to fuck you slowly with his fingers, watching the way your expression transitions from horror to pleasure, your mouth dropping open in a small “O”.

He can tell by your scent that you haven’t been with any other men recently, indicating that you most likely don’t have a regular suitor in your life. He would be right, your last boyfriend out of the picture for several months now. That’s a good thing, because Max doesn’t do competition.

“Would you like to know the other ways it’s useful? My super speed?” Max questions, curving his fingers into a spot that makes your body roll into an arch against him.

“Y-yeah,” you stutter. “Please.”

It’s fucked that you’re enjoying this. Max is a killer who’s cloaked in another man’s blood. Said man wasn’t particularly kind to you—was in fact, curt and rude—but that doesn’t mean he deserved such a fate.

Whatever conflict you’re currently having over the whole ordeal hastily disperses when it’s almost like Max switches on a vibrator between your legs, the edges of his arm blurring away, an exquisite tingle pooling amid your thighs, spreading through your abdomen.

Max doesn’t use his advanced speed often as it takes a lot out of him to do so. Vampires were not as invulnerable as everyone perceived them to be, so he only used it when it was its most advantageous, such as now.

Your head droops forward to rest on his shoulder, blood and all, biting back a moan between your teeth. You think he’s probably even better than your vibrator back home, as you can’t recall something ever making you feel this good.

He lifts your eyes back to him and bites down against the side of your neck—once again only human teeth, which still hurt by all accounts—your muscles clamping down around him with a whimper. You feel the familiar stirring growing low in your core, and you know your orgasm is not far off.

“Max—“

“That’s it, sweetheart. Quiet now. Cum for me. Cum for me, but don’t make a sound.”

His eyes are dark, brow pushed down into a stern line. They bore holes straight through your soul, unmoving from your face as he watches you. You close your eyes to concentrate on the impending orgasm and he snaps the tie against your neck, making you gasp, bringing you back to the present.

“Don’t take your eyes off of me.”

His thumb finds your clit, anchoring itself there and that does it, the coil inside of you unfurling, euphoria peaking as you struggle to keep your sounds to a lower pitch.

And then a not-so-recognizable sensation overtakes you and you’re suddenly gushing around his fingers, your eyes going wide with shock as you realize what is happening, knowing you’ve never done that before, you never knew it was something you could do.

“Messy little thing,” Max muses, fingers slipping free with another rush of fluids that trickle down your inner thigh.

Mind somewhat foggy now with over exertion, he can’t help but think how much it was worth it as he tastes you on his fingers.

He hikes your leg up once more, wrapping it around his waist like a belt as he undoes his pants, pulling himself free. His cock springs forward, rock hard and twitching eagerly, flaring red at the tip, more than ready to bury himself in your depths.

You can’t stop your eyes from wandering and you marvel at his size, swallowing in anticipation of it, but your gaze quickly whips back to his when he tugs harshly on the tie.

“Eyes stay up here, dollface.”

He swipes the head of his shaft through your folds, gathering your slick. He admires the cluster of stars you have tattooed on your inner thigh, dragging a thumb over it. An impulsive thing you did as soon as you turned eighteen simply because you could.

You notice as you watch him that Max also has a tattoo—a small bullseye no bigger than a dime on the side of his left hand.

“My pet needs a new name,” he hums as he aligns himself with your entrance. “How about Star? Would you like that?”

You nod in affirmation. “S-star, yes. I like it.”

Max grins. That wide, self-important grin retained from his former self, blood still staining his lips and chin. “Good. Because if you’re a good little pet, that is what you will be. My Star.”

He starts to push into you, slow at first so you get used to the stretch of him, and then snapping forward the last inch or so, sinking until his hips slot against yours. He lets out a groan that sounds almost demonic in its ardor, causing your heart to skip a beat or several.

“I can…hear your blood…moving. Fucking hot,” he growls.

The first thing you notice about Max as he begins thrusting inside of you is how cold he feels. Not ice cold, but for sure not the warm bodies you’re used to sharing yourself with. Oddly enough, you kind of like it.

You wrap one hand around his neck to steady yourself as he ruts into you. He isn’t going any faster than you’re used to, but that’s probably for the best. If he went even half as fast as he did with his arm, he might actually rip you in half.

You’re the first human Max has been with since the change. He missed it, the warmth of it. Sex with other vampires was too cold, both physically and psychologically, too cunning and dispassionate. He much prefers this, the warmth of your skin sinking into his, making him feel almost like his mortal self again; your little moans and mewls of passion bringing out the monster in him.

You have to hide your face in his chest to muffle all the various sounds of being fucked you’re making, which he surprisingly lets you do without retribution this time, each thrust of his hips jerking you halfway up the wall, the cloth of his nice dress shirt damp from blood, not sweat. Strangely enough, there is no sweat aside from your own, his skin smooth as porcelain.

He slants his hips to deepen the angle inside of you, causing you to whimper louder than intended, his hand tightening around your hip, bruising. If not for the previous expenditure of his energy and the fact he was going easier on you than usual, he could do this all night and then some. You’re making him absolutely ravenous and his self-control not to taste you is waning by the minute.

He pins you in place with the span of his body, increasing the speed and power of his thrusts, and within seconds your walls start to clamp around him, another orgasm building low in your belly.

“That’s it, Star. Cum for me. Cum on my cock,” he beckons.

His face tilts to your neck, aquiline nose nuzzling in the small hollow at the back of your jaw, the soft area that bridges your neck and throat. Grazing his teeth over the warmth of your skin, the heat of your pulsating artery.

The feel of his teeth dragging your skin, teasing, testing, making you clench, and then you’re cumming again with a muted whimper lost in the wide breadth of his chest. You feel his mouth part against your skin as you come undone, a sharp pain suddenly blooming hot in the muscle of your neck.

You feel liquid pooling in the dip of your collarbone, and you realize that Max is feeding on you, sharp canines sinking deep into your neck, tongue laving across your skin with a deep, guttural groan as he feasts upon you. The sounds he’s making are lascivious and lewd, sending a fresh new wave of arousal through you despite your panic, amplifying your orgasm.

Lips still locked to your neck as he feeds, Max’s hips stutter and then draw to a halt when he begins to spill himself inside of you, unable to fully contain himself now that he’s gotten a taste, an unholy, inhuman roar erupting from him so terrifying in its potency that you nearly scream.

Max pulls his face away, lips dark and shiny with a fresh coat of blood as he looks down at you, half-cocked grin playing there. There’s something unsettlingly alluring about it.

You begin to sob softly, you can’t help it, your adrenaline and endorphins dwindling now that all is said and done.

“Shhhh, my Star. It’s okay. You’re okay. You did so well for me,” he consoles, tracing your cheek with the back of his hand.

You see his fangs now, which you’re positive weren’t there before, sharp and pointed and slicked in red. He pricks a finger on one of them and squeezes it, blood beading at the end of his fingertip. He smears it over the punctures in your neck, and you feel a small tickle as they close up almost instantaneously.

And then you see his teeth retract, not dissimilar to a cat’s claws. There one second and gone the next.

He leans forward to clean up any remaining traces of blood, gently pulling you off of him. “See? Good as new,” he says with a wink.

“W-what do I do now?” you ask with a tremble in your voice. You start fidgeting with the tie to see if he’ll let you take it off. He cocks his head curiously.

“You stay with me,” he explains. “You’ll live with me. I’ll take fabulous care of you, my pet, don’t worry.”

“C-can I take this off?”

He shrugs. “Sure.”

You take it off and hand it to him, although it’s stained beyond usefulness, so he tosses it to the floor. He bends to gather your clothes, meticulously redressing you, placing a small kiss to your neck where he fed.

“You taste so fucking good, Star,” he pines with a stretch, sucking air through his teeth. “Best I’ve ever tasted. Now that I’ve had you, I’ll never be sated.”

He wraps his arms around your torso in an uncharacteristically tender embrace, skimming his lips along the shell of your ear. “Sleep, now,” he whispers, and you slip away just like that, Max lowering your now-limp body to the floor as he tucks his discarded jacket under your neck.

——

When you wake up—you don’t know how many minutes or hours later—Max is standing over you. Your eyes dart about the room and the man’s body and every trace of him is gone, as if he never existed. Max offers you a hand to help you up and you take it.

“What time is it?” you ask.

“Just before sunrise. It’s too late to leave. You can call in today and I’ll keep you hidden in my office.”

You frown. Calling in after St. Paddy’s Day isn’t a good look, but what other choice do you have? You just hope you don’t lose your job.

“Okay,” you reply, nodding your head in confirmation. “And at the end of the day?”

“We wait until sun down,” Max begins with a grin, “and then we go home.”

[comradekatara]

hello, since you did a mitski+gaang post, which mitski songs would you associate with yangchen, kavik and korrasami?

i should’ve done these in chronological order by album but I didn’t so please excuse the disjointedness. also this got kind of long so im putting it under a readmore…

“i’m your man” is SUCH a kavik & kalyaan and asami & hiroshi song. ugh

“bug like an angel” korra alone anthem

also “i don’t like my mind”

“when memories snow” is so yangchen and her past lives…

“the frost” kavik/yangchen breakup song (you’re my best friend, now i have no one to tell, of how i lost my best friend)

“I love me after you” asami & hiroshi and also korra & zaheer song (they’re king of all the land!!!)

“remember my name” is THEE ultimate korra song to me.

“me and my husband” is also an asami & hiroshi song. to me.

“a pearl” is such a yangchen and her past lives song….. (nobody told me it ended)

“why didn’t you stop me” the kavik/yangchen post-betrayal breakup anthem

“old friend” is a mako & korra & asami song…. reconciling with your ex moments

“come into the water” is so asami needing korra to make the first move…. (maybe i’m the same as all those men writing songs of all their dreaming…)

“liquid smooth” is also. you guessed it. an asami & hiroshi song.

as, of course, is “wife.”

“abbey” is another extremely existential korra song about legacy and identity

“brand new city” is asami’s internal monologue but she just never shows it

“pearl diver” is the ultimate chaisee song ever. i know you didn’t ask about her but like. this is THE chaisee song. if you even care

“real men” obviously another asami & hiroshi song. of course

“fireworks” is a korra song bc it’s literally the depression anthem of all time and, well.

“my body’s made of crushed little stars” is also a korra (alone) song. she’s not doing anything!

“a burning hill” is also an asami & hiroshi song. you might be thinking i’m insane at this point, but then i invite you to remember. that yasuko was literally killed by fire.

“goodbye my danish sweetheart” obviously a kavik/yangchen breakup song (kavik’s pov of course) i mean duh.

“strawberry blond” asami pining for korra moments…..

“class of 2013” another korra alone song and god what a song it is!

“valentine, texas” is a yangchen/kavik song no i will not elaborate on that

“working for the knife” WOULD be an asami song if lok understood that capitalism is bad. and yet. alas.

“stay soft” is a yangchen & kavik & chaisee & kalyaan song. naturally.

“everyone” another korra alone song.

“heat lightning” another existential korra song.

“the only heartbreaker” another kavik/yangchen breakup song from kavik’s pov

“texas reznikoff” is sooo korrasami (but i’ve been everywhere and it’s not what i want… i wanna be still with you…)

“first love / late spring” is, again, an asami & hiroshi (and kavik & kalyaan) song

“francis forever” is a korrasami and yangvik pining from a distance anthem

“I don’t smoke” is soooo asami & hiroshi and kavik & kalyaan. sorry

“jobless monday” yet another korra alone anthem

“I will” is SOOO korrasami it’s like the korrasami thesis statement

“carry me out” yangchen & korra (and every avatar’s) existential crisis moments. also a perfect note to end on bc it’s my favorite mitski song <3

[yourmidnightlover]

nevermore…

chapter 2: research

pairing: xavier thorpe x fem!reader

summary: you uncover things about yourself and where you got your powers from.

warnings: a bit of fluff, talking about/another panic attack kinda thing, xavier is a simp as usual, i think that’s it?

a/n: i’m so sorry, some of the tags for the list aren’t working! i’m also sorry that it took so long to get this out! i just want to make sure everything is as good as i want it to be. it’s not proofread very well, but i was able to skim it. anyway, if you want to be added to the taglist feel free to message me or comment on this post :)

chapter 1 here

your dad died when you were young. three, to be exact. at the ripe age of 31 your father took his own life. perhaps that’s what made your mother so temperamental, losing your father.

because you were so young when he passed, you never really learned to miss him. how do you miss someone you don’t remember? your mom boxed away all photos of him and doesn’t mention him very often at all. perhaps that was so you wouldn’t ask any questions, or maybe it was because she was angry with him leaving.

sometimes you wonder what he looked like, if you looked like him. maybe he would have loved you. but, if he loved you then why did he leave? he wouldn’t have.

to be honest, there was always the option of googling his name to see what would pop up. maybe he was some tortured genius. maybe he was an artist or at least someone who loved his child.

maybe you preferred the mystery.

you were used to being alone and not having someone. you weren’t used to someone trying to make you comfortable. you weren’t used to someone making you a priority. you weren’t used to someone being around. being there.

maybe the feeling was growing on you.

“how was your first day?” yoko asked as she seemed to be making her bed for the night. “sorry we didn’t get to spend much time together, i guess our schedules just don’t match up.”

“oh that’s alright,” you assured her as you finished unpacking your half of the room. “it was… good? i kept running into that xavier guy.”

“ahh,” she chuckled as she plopped down on her bed.

“what’s ‘ahh’ for?” you stopped hanging up your clothes to face her. “what’s that mean?”

“just means ‘ahh’,” she continued to laugh at your reaction. after hearing you sigh, she continued, “xavier thorpe doesn’t normally engage with people. ‘loner’ type, remember?”

“i remember,” you nodded, picking up another shirt and putting it on your hanger. “so… so when he insists on being my dance partner, what does that mean?”

she laughed heartily this time, “that means he probably has the hots for you.”

you remained quiet. it didn’t make much sense for him to want to get to know you even in the slightest. you didn’t know him and there was no doubt in your mind that there was nothing special enough about you to draw someone as hot of a commodity as xavier to want to be near you. of all people, it was you.

“yea, whatever,” you laughed with her, hoping she was merely joking about his possible interest in you. “i’m sure he has a few girls lining up at his door, being the tortured artist of nevermore and everything.”

“he used to date bianca, the ‘it’ girl,” she got comfortable in bed, shuffling underneath her blankets and pillows. “not anymore. other than that there really isn’t anyone that any of us know about.”

“what happened between them?” you asked as you finally closed your closet, getting your own bed ready for you to go to sleep.

she took a deep breath, “well, she’s a siren. and rumor has it that he couldn’t trust that his feelings for her were real. again, simply a rumor,” she shrugged as she began to hug one of her pillows.

“hmm,” you shut off the light and got in bed.

maybe tomorrow you would learn more about his need to know you. maybe you would somehow understand it. but, this wasn’t the point of coming to nevermore.

you couldn’t get off track so early. you needed to make your mom proud. you needed to go back home and live your life normally like you had before this entire mess. so you can leave magic and powers and abilities behind you.

“goodnight, yoko,” you said only loud enough to ensure she could hear you.

“goodnight, y/n.”

-

the next morning you woke up feeling more rested than you expected. you were anticipating a sore body and tired eyes but you were only welcome with the dim light from outside peaking through your window.

“it’s saturday,” yoko informed you. “a few of us are going into jericho to get some fresh, not-nevermore-flavored air. i think you should come with us!”

“when are you guys leaving?” you rubbed the sleep from your eyes as you sat up in bed, clad in only your little nightgown.

“about an hour?” yoko had finished brushing out her hair before plopping down at her desk.

you stepped out of bed to stretch before you heard a knock at the door. yoko got up to answer it, you could only see her smile from the door covering whoever this person was.

“is she coming?” you heard the familiar voice ask in a rushed, trying to be hushed, manner. “is she even awake yet?”

“oh, she’s awake,” she stepped out of the way to let none other than xavier walk inside of your room.

you stood there, now crossing your arms as he simply smiled at you from the door. “good morning,” he seemed extremely happy.

“mhmm,” you went into your closet to grab some clothes and shut it, walking into the bathroom to change.

you heard their muffled talking from inside the bathroom.

“dude,” yoko’s voice rang out. “what the hell?” she was chuckling, her voice very lighthearted.

“what?” his voice rose an octave as he responded. “maybe i just wanna spend more time with her?”

“but why?”

“because…” you heard pacing.

“what about her is so intriguing to you?” she chuckled once more, this time humorlessly.

“you do know there are some things you don’t need to know, yoko,” his voice seemed cocky, joking in a manner.

once you came out, now fully clothed, xavier was now sitting on yoko’s bed as she continued to write, you didn't know what, on her desk. this would be your first outing in the town, and you were only hoping for it to not go terribly. avoiding all gazes and stares would be the goal of this little excursion, and you could only pray it would go as planned.

it wasn’t even a half hour later when you and a bunch of other students were boarding a shuttle bus to jericho. the drive was shorter than you expected, which made you feel better about the school’s surroundings. you were terrified of feeling as though you were isolated from the entirety of the outside world. 

“your first outing in jericho has to be perfect,” xavier insisted as he began to walk with you down the rather ordinary street. perhaps you expected something more… nevermore-y. “Which is why i think we should go to weathervane first, my treat, of course. they have pretty decent coffee there."

"oh, coffee," you groaned with excitement as you continued down the small streets. "where's everyone else going?" you pointed behind you where everyone else began walking.

he looked behind him as they began their tread towards the library, "ahh, doing some research at the library i guess."

"i should probably be doing some of that too, research," you clarified. since you were coming into the school already late, you had some work you had to catch up on. you had plants to research, potions to memorize and reading to do. "i'm a bit behind."

"i can help with that," he smiled as you turned to face him, a grin that didn't take up his face but merely told you he would enjoy the time. "i'm kinda top of the class, aside from bianca, of course.”

"hmm," you nodded. you were top if your class back in the normal high school, but things were clearly run differently around here. “i might need that help if i’m being honest.”

his eyes continued to look back at his friends who entered the library. you weren’t sure why he was so interested in the fact that they needed to do whatever research interested them, but he was. perhaps you should’ve been a bit more interested in his interest in their interests.

regardless, the coffee at the weathervane was delicious. xavier ordered what you had ordered, which was a simple vanilla macchiato, and claimed to like it as well. back home, you had truly enjoyed coffee of all sorts. you even had an espresso machine that you treated as careful as you would a child.

“do you know if there’s anyone that could help me?” you spoke bravely as he walked with you to the antique store. “like with the mind stuff?”

“telekinesis?” he offered the proper word for it.

“and i think telepathy too,” you added before glancing up at the tall man. “i can sometimes read minds. it’s just that i have no control over any of it. it scares my m-people. it scares people.”

he looked back down as your eyes began tracing the sidewalk, “my roommate has telekinesis. i can see if he knows much about it if you’d like?”

“has he always had it?” you were dying to know more. you mostly just wanted to know why your powers only started now, rather than when you were born. “his powers? mine started a few months ago for no reason and… i need some answers.”

“i think he was born with it,” he shrugged apologetically. “if you need help learning to control it, i might be able to help. my art, i can make it come to life. it took me a while to be able to control it, and sometimes it still gets out of hand, but i can definitely try to help.”

“why would you do that?” you stopped walking and tugged on his jacket, forcing him to stay with you. “why are you so adamant on-on helping me? you don’t even know me.”

“i could know-or i could get to know you,” his brows rose as if he was trying to convince you. “you could call it a hunch.”

“is that why it was so easy for you to help me the other day?” you knew your eyes held desperation for his answer. they were pleading. your mom always told you that your eyes held all of your emotion. “because you have good instincts?”

“yea,” he nodded as he let his eyes dart all over your face. “maybe that’s why.”

with a nod and a sigh, you grasped onto the fabric of his jacket to lead him back down the sidewalk, as if you knew where you were going. he grasped your hand to lead you to the inside of the sidewalk before continuing the walk to uriah’s heap.

“y’know,” he began as you searched the odd store. “you’ve barely decorated your room. how about we go to one of the good thrift stores here and revamp your room, pun intended.”

“revamp, haha,” you smiled as you looked at stuffed roadkill on a shelf. “i don’t have the money. i didn’t really expect to come here so soon and my mom hasn’t been able to-“

“i’ll pay,” he insisted as he gently grasped your shoulder. “i want to. my dad gives me this allowance type thing. i think it’s to subside his own guilt for never talking to me, but you might as well benefit from it.”

“i can’t,” you refused as you walked away and down a different isle.

“it’s really not a big deal!” he insisted with a smile as he followed you down the rows. “i have it but i don’t want it. please let me help you? i want this place to feel more comfortable for you.”

“i don’t want to get comfortable,” you rephrased as you slammed a trinket back down on its shelf. this place isn’t supposed to be home for you. you don’t need to ‘get comfortable’ because you should be leaving as soon as you can. as soon as it’s safe for you to be in public. “and i don’t want to be some charity case for you.”

“that’s not-“

“i want to leave now,” you promptly walked out of the shop and took a deep breath of the fresh air.

“hey,” his hand pressed gently against your back. “i didn’t mean to upset you. i just want you to know that we all want you here. i want you here. i want to help you.”

“i don’t want to be your charity case,” you argued back as you took another step forward so he would remove his hand.

“you aren’t, you aren’t,” he assured you as he rose his hands.

you felt your breath picking up, your heart began to rapidly beat. “xavier, it’s…” you breathed out. “it’s gonna happen. my head, it’s-“

“okay, remember what i said,” he took this moment to hold onto your hands. “breathe and focus on something, anything.”

“can i-look at me?” you breathed out. “or you look at me. i need to…” his hands went to your face now, cupping it gently. you held onto his arms.

“let’s get somewhere more private, yea?” you nodded as you looked into his eyes once more. he guided you to an alley right around the corner. “in, two, three, four…” he guided your breathing.

“i’m,” you sighed as your grasp on his arms tightened. “i’m okay. my head just… it hurts now.”

“let’s go, yea?” he nodded with you as he wrapped an arm around your waist. you rested your head on his shoulder as he led you to a shuttle bus.

“this is the second time i’ve nearly had a breakdown around you,” you sighed as he helped you off the shuttle. “that has got to be a record or something.”

“what do you say we try to work on controlling those powers if yours?” he paused before looking down at you with a smile.

“i um,” you paused while thinking. “i found an old shed that weems is letting me fix up. maybe we could practice there? i mean, we would need to fix it up a bit more as we go, but-“

“that sounds great,” he agreed as he let you lead the way. “so we have to fix it up, huh?”

“well, yea,” you said as if it were obvious. “i might even let you use it as an art studio, as long as i can still go there whenever i please,” you said smugly as you dragged on his coat sleeve once more. “i already have some pretty cool plans for the place! i mean i haven’t written anything down yet, but it’s all up here,” you used your free hand and tapped your temple.

“well, tell me what to do, and i’ll do it,” he didn’t even know what he was getting himself into.

“ahh, the perfect guy,” you sighed as you led him through the woods to the shed you had already cleared out.

once you opened the shed, a breath of relief flew through you. you sat on the concrete floor and insisted he sit beside you by patting the ground. he took your queue with a smirk, his long legs crossing underneath one another into a cross-cross applesauce position.

“lots of potential,” he nodded as he watched your face glow with creativity.

“i know,” you smiled for once. “i can’t wait to get to the good stuff in here. it’s gonna be great! i was thinking about stringing some lights along the trims up top,” your hands motioned to what you were talking about. “and maybe even mrs. thornhill would let us borrow some non-carnivorous plants to help decorate! and then some nice vines trailing along with the lights…” now both of your hands were motioning towards the ceiling. “and your art could decorate the whole place! and then a few chairs, or maybe even beanbags for the aesthetic, with a nice, antique table for your art supplies and then a few easels for your art! it’ll be wonderful.”

“have you done this before?” he chuckled at how eager you were. “you seem so excited about it all. it’s cute.”

“i used to help my mom restore things,” you nodded before simply picking at your own nails. “my grandmother used to do that with her, and her mom with her… you get the point.”

“that’s nice,” he grabbed one of your hands to stop your picking. “so you and your mom are close?”

“we… we were,” you let your fingers intertwine with his in a moment of weakness. “she’s a bit indifferent about my new abilities. i dunno why… but i never really knew my dad. he died when i was young. so it’s always just been me and her. now, it’s just me, i guess.”

“i’m sorry,” both his hands cradled your own. “i’m honored that you’re letting me help, though,” he was interrupted by his phone ringing. “i’ll be right back.”

he stepped outside for a few minutes to take the call. you simply waited for him with your head thrown back against the walls of the shed. you hadn’t told anyone about your dad. your mom barely even talked about him. you never knew why.

“sorry, that was yoko,” he entered the shed once more. “they’re all on there way back, and they have some information for you, about telekinesis.”

“is that what they were doing at the library?” he nodded. “what’d they find out?”

“i dunno yet, mystery,” he smiled. “but we’re about to find out,” he grasped your hand and helped you off the floor.

once leading you through the school and to a statue of edgar allen poe, he simply snapped twice. the statue moved to the side, revealing a spiral staircase leading to some sort of secret library. his hand remained in yours the entire way.

“hey!” yoko greeted with an eager wave. “so, we went searching for some things for you… regarding telekinesis. of course, we had to go to the library in jericho but that’s only because they have this secret-anyway we found some information!”

“okay,” you nodded as you got to the bottom of the staircase. “what is it?”

“well,” yoko began to explain. “there has only been one other person who became telekinetic throughout their life. turns out, it happens when the life around you most needs it.”

“who was this only other person?” you wondered out loud.

“his name was john y/l/n,” kent, a siren, informed you.

your face went blank. it can’t be. there’s no fucking way that your father had these powers. why was your mother so frightened of you if your father had the same gifts?

“that’s my…” you felt tears in your eyes.

“what is it?” xavier’s hand held onto your shoulder worriedly. “what’s wrong.”

“that’s my dad.”

taglist:

@honey-with-tea @let-love-bleeds-red @katiemrty @im-done-with-this-im-out @princess-depresso @thequietreader90 @dakotali @xlittlemissydjx @l4venderia @whiteboycarlgallagher @darknessgirlgachalifeoficieel @krispybearbouquet @lilipop1226 @czeniess @gardensofivy @iloveurgf @lwesodra @pauphs @nctma15 @evernycto @lydeebugz @erens1andonly @juno-1610 @yourfavoritefangirl @panicattheeverywherekid @cmac-writes @wilddxchildd @arunaposeidondottir @sp1ng @pygmy-huff @bisexual-and-intellectual

[shironekil]

My love for Tokyo Ghoul.

I cannot express how much I love Tokyo Ghoul.

I finished my first reread last Saturday, and I’ve been experiencing classic TG brainrot. There has been so much going through my mind related to TG and I wanted to put it all down, somewhere, anywhere. I thought jotting it down into a tumblr post might be nice. I haven’t ever done this before, and I often find it hard to put all of my thoughts and feelings into words. Honestly, I didn’t expect everything to hit as hard as it did compared to when I first read TG. Considering I already knew the major reveals and plot points, I didn’t think they would make me feel the same way they did on my first experience, but I was very wrong. From start to finish, I loved every bit of it, probably even more than I did on my first read. Remembering the main aspects of the story and the different arcs and plot points actually gave me the chance to focus on and appreciate everything about TG so much more. Be it the characters or the art or the themes and symbolism. Also, I definitely think reading it at a slower pace helped, considering I bingeread it the first time. Without a doubt, Tokyo Ghoul is my favourite piece of fiction ever.

Tokyo Ghoul had everything I could ask for. The aspect of TG that I treasure most is the cast. It has a wonderful, wonderful group of characters. I can’t emphasize how much I love the TG cast. I probably have a special spot for almost every single one, at least among the significant characters. Be it Hinami, Tsukiyama, Hide, Eto, Juzo, Urie, Amon, Saiko, Akira, Nishiki, Takizawa, Renji, Ayato, Arima.. Ishida just presented them in a way where I could do nothing but be heavily invested in them. I can’t really think of any other manga that made me love the characters this much. Granted that stories like One Piece, HxH, JJK, and Jigokuraku each have an amazing cast with characters I love, I just feel different about the characters in Tokyo Ghoul. It might be because of the deep level of empathy I developed for each one of the characters? Maybe I could better relate to or understand what they went through? I personally think Tokyo Ghoul combined fiction with reality so well. When I say fiction, I mean in the sense of fantasy. When I read manga like One Piece, I feel immersed in the world and it takes me out of reality when I’m reading. Even for manga in real world settings, such as JJK, I get so caught up in the outwordly story that I don’t really have a grapse on reality. What I’m trying to say is that with TG, I really felt that many things depicted in the story were directly applicable to the real world we live in. It gave us a two-sided story where we constantly had a perspective of the Investigator and Ghoul world, and how their actions impact everything. It felt like this could be something happening in real life. In fact, many things shown in the manga are happening in real life but in the context of only humans. I’ll probably elaborate on that further after I finish talking about the characters or on another post. What I noticed is that I grew so much more fond of some characters I grew during this reread, who I didn’t really care much about before. Ui, Hanbeh, Hirako, Naki, Hairu, Hsiao.. I could go on. One of Ishida’s many strengths is his character writing and development. Kaneki is on a special tier of his own, to the point where I would say he is the best written character in manga. It might be a stretch for some, but the complexity and depth of Ken Kaneki is just something I haven’t gotten over since I first read TG. Aside from our MC, the way Ishida developed our side cast was amazing. Notably, I felt the strongest character arcs (aside from Touken) over the course of two parts were Arima, Eto, Suzuya, Amon, Shuu, Hinami, and Yomo. In relation to :re, Urie and Mutsuki probably had my favourite character arcs. Every character got a share of magic. On the reread, I got to appreciate certain characters a lot more.

The concept of investigators coming from the Hakubi Garden piqued my interest in Hairu, Hsiao, and Squad 0. I barely noticed them when I first read TG. When Hairu debuted, I had no clue she would be such a menace with her quinque. My first impression was that she was a cute and mysterious airhead. When she faced Matsumae and the others for the first time, I was blown away by her skills. Arima was very different, as he was built up constantly throughout the entire story. Kishou was literally named the “Reaper”, I don’t know what else you could to build that lethal, frightening aura he had. When I saw Hairu battle with such ease, I was instantly a fan. In an exagerrative sense, it felt like we were somewhat seeing a female version of Arima. That is where I really understood how special these Hakubi Garden children were. My appreciation for Squad 0 jumped up from then on. Hirako, similarly to Ui, had my attention from the 20th ward anteiku battle, and I really liked the bigger role he had to play in :re. Hsiao was the “new” quinx that immediately grabbed my attention. I loved her character design and reading that she came from the Garden meant I was going to read in joy whenever she was action. Hairu and Hsiao gave me some of my fav moments during the Rosé and Dragon arcs.

Ayato is someone I absolutely love after the reread. The way he matured reminds me a lot of Urie, although each of them did so differently. When we first met Ayato pre time skip, I couldn’t think of him as anything but an annoying rat. He wasn’t nice, he was aggresive, and I can’t really blame him because he was just one of many victims of the cruel world. I immediately caught onto how much Ayato had grown by TG :re. The panel where he tells the Torso, in calm and reasonable fashion, that him and his gang are nicer than the other Aogiri ghouls. I instantly remembered how he told Kaneki the same exact thing while he was repeatedly kicking him. The contrast in how Ayato acted in these two situations made it clear that Ayato had changed, from someone filled with rage and violence to someone composed and rational. Renji did say, during his fight with Arima, that the Kirishima siblings were like their mother - out of control. Touka undergoes a similar transition. I understood that both of them had let go of the past, which previously filled their hearts with hatred and anger. All his future actions and mannerisms displayed further showed us that Ayato has really grown up. I definitely think that Hinami played a key part in helping Ayato change. When Ayato first met Hinami, he still seemed somewhat unapproachable, like he was when he dealt with Kaneki. When Ayato got angry at her and Hinami laughed, it was probably the start of a new path for Ayato. Similarly to Touka, I felt that he was dealing with the despair of being alone in a cruel world. Parents gone, sister not there. Ayato dealt with it different to how Touka did, but they both felt alone and angry. Hinami gave Ayato the opportunity to feel that warmth he was missing - to fill that void in his heart, similarly to how Kaneki did with Touka. I could talk a lot more about Ayato. “Keep going Kaneki” will always give me goosebumps. He had accepted Kaneki, not only as his King, but as his brother in law.

I was dragged into getting all sympathetic and attached to Naki. He might be “bros” with that psychopath Jason, but I just couldn’t shake off how I felt about him. The loyalty he showed was second to none. Whether it was that panel of him mumbling his comrades names or when he protected Miza or when he pledged loyalty to the One Eyed King, on top of the fact hes a goofball, I couldn’t help but like the guy. I won’t forget how he improved his vocab through reading because Ken advised his people to do so.

The Quinxes shined ever so brightly, which I expected as I only had good memories of them from the first time I read TG :re. Every single Quinx left a lasting impression on me. All for different reasons. I could talk constantly about each Quinx. Kuki Urie, who had one of the best character arcs I’ve ever seen in animanga, will always be a hero for me. I cannot get over how he turned from an egotistical and self centered dog to a considerate and thoughtful leader. What I really loved about Urie is that his character development was extremely visible. You noticed it in the story and you would notice how you changed from “I hate this dude” to “I love him!”. So much about him had changed, which was conveyed through even the smallest details. I noticed how little he would smile before losing Shirazu, and how much more he smiled when he became Qs leader. That moment where Urie just smiles at the sight of Saiko crying tears of joy after finding out Maman is still alive is so heartwarming. Saiko is the most precious character in TG. I could not get enough of how adorable she was. When she saved Urie after framing out, when she saved Mutsuki on the dragon, when she was hugging Maman when he was still in a coma, or when she was holding Touka’s hand as they waited for Ken to return. On top of giving us heartfelt moments, she was incredible with her kagune and I’m so glad she was the Quinx who had the ability of using her kagune so freely, I felt it really suited her character. Toru Mutsuki probably has one of the creepiest character arcs I’ve ever seen. Normally, I don’t get too affected by fictitious violence, in the sense that I don’t let it lurk in my mind later, but I just could not get over Mutsuki and her story. Chapter 79. No exagerration, Chapter 79 is one of the most sickening and provoking chapters I’ve ever read. Pre Rushima, I loved Mustuki. She reminded me so much of Kaneki before he had met Jason and tragedy occured. The parallels between Mutsuki and Kaneki were very clear throughout the story, even during Rushima and especially during Chapter 79. I could say so much about what that chapter meant and how it made me feel. Kaneki was an example of someone who was able to overcome his demons, whereas Mutsuki was an example of someone who couldn’t. She went onto an absolutely hopeless path as some sort of psychopath which was really painful to see. I could talk endlessly about Mutsuki. As a character, I love her as much as many of my favs. Urie and Mutsuki are perfect examples of side characters that just stick to your mind. I hadn’t read TG in two years, but whenever someone talks about well-written side characters, they spring to mind.

Furuta was an unbelievable antagonist. Ishida managed to create the TG version of the Joker. Nimura managed to be evil and heartless while running a troll gimmick. I couldn’t help but laugh at his trolling, even in the most serious situations. In addition to the Joker, he reminded me of Aizen. The fact that he has basically planned everything that has happened in the plot, from the moment he dropped the steel beams to the moment Ken eats all of the Oggai, was just so Aizen-esque. As bad as Furuta was, his backstory still broke my heart. The despair he felt stemmed from the world he had to live in and he decided to destroy it all.

I just have to leave a special mention in this post for Tsukiyama and Hinami. I adore both of them, especially with how :re went on and concluded.

Kaneki and Touka have a special place in my heart forever. I absolutely adore them and I love them so much. My favourite characters in all of fiction. I can write pages of what I feel and think about them. My sweet eyepatch and darling rabbit. Ishida gave them royalty treatment in every way possible. Everytime they were together in a panel, my heart just filled up with joy.

TG art is unrivaled. I haven’t and I doubt I will ever come across anything with art like this. It just isn’t something you can replicate or imitate. Every drawing manages to convey different feelings and ideas.. I never truly understood the beauty of art until I read Tokyo Ghoul. It isn’t just a drawing or depiction of a certain scenario. It bursts out at you with emotion. There are obviously other manga which have got amazing art. Berserk and Vagabond come to mind. I just feel TG art contains so many thought and emotion provoking layers to it while simultaneously being aesthetically pleasing. The art is obviously one of the main appeals of TG. You could pull almost any panel and I guarantee it would look amazing. A panel may provoke fear, sadness, despair, joy, amazement, or a bundle of different emotions in you when looking at it. Chapter 145 is a perfect example. An entire chapter with no speech at all. An entire chapter of nothing but beautiful spreads and panels depicting the destructive and chaotic nature of the dragon. “A picture is worth a thousand words.”

What I really love about Tokyo Ghoul and what I believe attracts me to it the most are the themes and ideas that Ishida is constantly trying to convey, and how so many of them are directly applicable to the real world. Tokyo Ghoul gave me so many life lessons on so many different things. Whether it was related to loneliness, relationships, discrimination, inner peace, normalcy in life, the purpose of life and moving forward. It all comes to mind when reading TG. Each theme or idea is obviously interconneted with the others, and I really feel that they’re directly applicable to the world we live in. We obviously don’t have to deal with ghouls, but many of the struggles and conflicts that our beloved characters faced reminded me of the things we face in our everyday lives. I could relate to some of the things that they showed in the manga in relation to these ideas. “This world is wrong.” I haven’t come across any line in anime or manga that stuck with me like this did, until I read :re. “The world isn’t wrong. It just is.” The way grey morality was depicted in TG in relation to what is right or wrong is an issue I feel strongly exists in our world, especially in today’s day and age. This is probably because the setting and events in Tokyo Ghoul remind me so much of the things happening in our world. TG just had the perfect mix of fiction and reality. I was immersed in a different world that was filled with ghouls and humans while somewhat keeping me linked to reality. I don’t really know how to put it into words. If I had to explain it, I guess it kept me fully engaged in this fictional setting where ghouls existed, where I would just constantly think about and get anxious, sad, or excited over the characters. At the same time, the events and dialogue taking place in the story constantly made me go back and think about the real world and how it relates or applies to reality. I was absorbed by this fictitious world while always thinking about how it relates to our world.

I just have to mention how special the writing and storytelling in TG is. I noticed such things individually and got to do my research on them, in addition to discovering other aspects to his writing and drawings from reddit. In Tokyo Ghoul, it was clear from the start that every single panel, drawing and piece of dialogue served a purpose. There was always some sort of significance to whatever Ishida was showing us. A panel could include either subtle details in his art, such as the constant tarot card hints or the habits the characters had like Kaneki touching his chin or Mutsuki clenching her arm. A panel could directly imply something, such as making a literature reference. This added more depth in relation to the story, the characters and what Ishida wanted to convey through various methods of symbolism. Reading about the context of the tarot cards, literature references and metaphors made the story much more interesting. It helped us understand the TG characters on a deeper level in terms of what themes they symbolize and what role in the story they represent.

I feel like I’ve written a good share on Tokyo Ghoul for now. I understand that much of what I said might seem all over the place, but I just wanted to speak from the heart. I have so much more to speak on, which I will probably do in other posts. I guess my final words on this have to be:

I LOVE TOKYO GHOUL!

[fubukiswifenoimnotjoking]

MAJOR ONE PUNCH MAN MANGA AND WEBCOMIC SPOILERS BELOW!!!!

I haven’t sorted my thoughts about the new chapter yet but I’ll prob post about it later, but for now I really want to highlight this major difference between manga and wc

Wc:

Here, Saitama stands in the desolate (unflooded) ruins of Z city, very alone and numb. He’s left to face the destruction of his home with a bitter, cold feeling. It’s one of the most serious moments in the wc for our unserious main character and it’s not fun, seeing him punished just for living in Z city. (Note—it’s assumed he leaves Genos to be picked up after this fight by Kuseno’s drones, or if he does pick up Genos himself then it’s not on screen.)

Now, I wanna juxtapose this with the cover art and final page of chapter 169–

In the manga, Saitama isn’t alone. He and Genos face this together after everything they’ve seen because they’re the only person each other can rely on right now. Another thing, unlike the wc—Saitama focuses on Genos needs first, saying he wants to get Genos fixed up first before they focus on the apartment, where in the wc he didn’t even tell Genos this, he just kinda poetically walked off. (Also, I find it really nice that Saitama is showing concern for Genos even though he forgot everything about Genos’ death and stuff, it’s like a little of his future self’s realization of how much Genos means to him is leaking through.) I mean, the fucking cover art has them painted in such hopeful sunset colors, literally facing the desolation together despite how overwhelming it is.

Not only is this change indicative of how manga Saitama is superior (yes I said it), but it further strengthens their already beautiful relationship (u can take that as ship or not, I see it both ways). It’s a really sweet cap off to the whole omfg-Genos-is-dead-I’m-losing-my-mind-gonna-literally-kill-everything scene.

Does this mean I think their reunion was well done? God no. I hate that Saitama forgot everything, that comes dangerously close to just making the whole thing have no point. I’m at least glad Genos remembers, but he can’t even explain it to Saitama bc it’s so confusing and convoluted (I don’t blame Saitama for being confused lol), and yes, I know Saitama will probably remember later on and it will be a huge relief for the audience while adding to his understanding of his care for Genos, but dammit! I just want them to have a sweet crying beautiful reunion!!! ONE WHY CANT YOU JUST GIVE US SAITAMA CRYING AND TELLING GENOS EVERYTHING???? WHY CANT GENOS BE TAKEN ABACK BY SAITAMA’S ABSOLUTE DEVESTATION AND WHY CANT THEY HAVE A TENDER HEART TO HEART ABOUT HOW THEY DONT WANNA LOSE EACH OTHER???? FUCK!!!!

Point is, I really love this change, it makes their duo even stronger from going through this together and it’s just loads more fun. Hope that was comprehensive LOL I ranted a lot.

WHOOOO this arc is finally over after literal years!!! Lets GOOOOOO!!!

[myonedream]

⋆⋆‧̍̊ ·̊ ~⋆ ✦ ⋆~ ·̊ ‧̍̊ ‧̍̊ ·̊ ~⋆ ☾ ⋆~ ·̊ ‧̍̊ ‧̍̊ ·̊ ~⋆ ✦ ⋆~ ·̊ ‧̍̊⋆⋆

“That’s My Good Boy.”

⋆⋆‧̍̊ ·̊ ~⋆ ✦ ⋆~ ·̊ ‧̍̊ ‧̍̊ ·̊ ~⋆ ☾ ⋆~ ·̊ ‧̍̊ ‧̍̊ ·̊ ~⋆ ✦ ⋆~ ·̊ ‧̍̊⋆⋆

✦ ⋆DNI Minors & Ageless Blogs⋆ ✦

A/N ~ Hello loves! If you don’t already know, this is my first fic on here! My name is L (more on me in my pinned post if interested), I’ve been on Tumblr for 10 years and writing in general for even longer so I’m definitely not new to either, though I’ve never written smut before so this is my first time for that. I really wanted to write this fic in particular as it’s something that plagues my mind every since this -> post/ask from @napofamoon. Even though now I made this about Hyuka hehe (tbh imagined it as him every time I read it after reading it the second time because he just gives me giant puppy vibes). I did use the ear thing here as well so credit to anon for that! This fic is actually the inspo to start this blog, along with the amazing TXT smut community on here that I’ve been secretly following for awhile. And I have to admit, this is quite self indulgent so… guess y’all caught me in 4K 😂. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it regardless and please let me know of any errors/thoughts you have! I know I’ve read this like 9 times and I think it’s pretty good, but I’m still nervous that there are some errors and y’all might not like it. Especially since it’s hybrid smut. But I don’t think there are any errors and I truly do like it, I just got hella anxiety so y’know. But enough of my rambles and happy reading :)

CW ~ Idol Wolf Hybrid!Hueningkai x afab!reader (not specified as a girl), Subby Top!Kai, breeding kink and a lot of it, creampie (remember this is just fantasy so don’t be silly, wrap ya willy), praise, uses of names such as Pup, Baby, Master & Mommy, definitely a petite reader so size kink for sure (he kinda manhandles her even though not intentionally cause he’s just a big ol’ puppy at the end of the day :(), pantie stealing, good bit of dirty talk, some pretty soft moments, consent is sexy type vibes, choking, biting, cockwarming at the very end, boy lowkey desperate and a bit of a perv. If I missed something, let me know!

~⋆ ✦ ⋆~Smut Under Cut!~⋆ ✦ ⋆~

You’ve known Kai for a long time, having met when you both were 6 years old so him being a hybrid was never a secret to you. It was basically his opening line when he approached you during recess, barking at you and exclaiming that he had a tail, which he then promptly showcased. Being so young, you found it incredibly interesting and because you desperately wanted a dog more than anything when he asked if you wanted to be his master you of course said yes! Unbeknownst to you all that entailed, and how different a wolf, especially a wolf hybrid, was from an actual dog. But you didn’t care because your friendless and petless self basically now had both!

So for years you remained his master and as time went on you began to realize how big of a job it actually was. You didn’t even know how big of a deal having a master in the hybrid community was until many years passed. You were essentially a glorified babysitter that didn’t get paid. Hanging out with him 24/7, keeping him out of trouble when his animal instincts kicked in, letting him sleep curled up next to you on your bed, taking him on walks, being woken at 6am sharp with puppy kisses all over your face to take him on another walk. The boy basically lived with your family at that point. If he wasn’t so cute you would’ve wanted out a long time ago but he became your best friend you could tell anything to so you found it endearing having him be your shadow, even if his own shadow was much bigger than yours. So when he started to pursue his dream of being an idol of course you came along for the ride.

When he was finally in a group and they had plans to debut him, he begged the company to allow you to move in with him and his group mates, the leader, Soobin, the eldest, Yeonjun, Beomgyu and Taehyun. Then of course he begged you, to which you put up a fight and “reluctantly” agreed. Though truly you wanted to live with him just as much as he did with you, even though you’d never tell him that. Eventually debut came and after that a new place, bigger company and a lot of fame and well deserved recognition. Him and his members, who you became good friends with, were on top on the world.

Then he began having…hybrid issues. Essentially every hybrid reaches full maturity at a different age and what effects you the most is your sexual drive, making it an incredibly difficult time, especially to hide it. It’s like one day you wake up and your heat is so incredibly painful it’s nearly impossible to even walk or sleep comfortably. Kai is a late bloomer, he’s 21 and is just now starting his maturity cycle, making performing and recording content for the fans extremely hard. They already know he’s a hybrid but they don’t need to know when specifically he’s in heat and being the fact his ears pop out when he is, it’s not like he can hide it any. Though there has been one thing that’s been keeping him from losing his marbles: you.

He keeps telling you how much he loves you and how your comfort is the only thing keeping him sane at every opportunity. Cuddled up in your bed, in your lap, in your arms, as if he’s the one who’s 150cm. You just think the love and support is what’s helping him and that it’s not that horrific since he seems to be keeping himself together well and you know it’ll all pass soon enough. But truthfully, he’s absolutely losing it. Sure, you’re helping, but not how you think you are. The reason he’s constantly curled up to you or in your lap? Your scent. And not how you as a whole smells, how your pussy smells.

He’s a wolf deep down (even if he acts like a giant puppy) so he has an incredible sense of smell. Unlike how others can’t smell you down there without having to stick their whole nose up there, he just has to get within a few feet to smell it. Usually that is. But with how bad his heat has been as he’s now finally reaching full maturity, he can smell your pussy the moment he enters a room with you in it. If you’re arroused or on your period, he knows. And when you ovulate, it sends his instincts into overdrive. Which is why his head is always in your lap, he’s taking in deep breaths of your scent as close as he can get to your pussy without it being weird. You would think your scent would drive him more mad but somehow it’s comforting as it’s familiar but lately it just hasn’t been cutting it. So he comes up with a plan whilst you sleep next to him, completely unaware, in your basically shared at this point bed, to help him get the purest whiff of you in the morning. He then manages to contain his excitement and nerves of acting out his plan and proceeds to fall asleep, nuzzling into your neck.

You wake up the next morning to Kai lovingly cuddled up against you, holding one of the giant plushies you got him years ago as a birthday gift. It’s his day off so you don’t bother to wake him as you get out of bed, you pick out your outfit for the day and head into the bathroom. You sit your clean clothes on the sink then proceed to have your morning pee, washing your hands after. Now you turned on the shower to get it heated up before you enter and begin to remove your oversized shirt that once belonged to Kai, exposing your bare breasts to the cold air of the AC vent above you, hardening your nipples instantly. You take off your pretty royal blue panties and drop them down onto the floor on top of your shirt, now completely naked, you enter the shower and begin to clean up.

Once Kai hears the water running he wakes, taking time to scroll on Weverse before eventually getting up to act out the plan he made last night. He approaches the bathroom to come inside, at this point you’re not sure how long it’s been since you got in when you hear the door open but nonetheless you instinctively call out “Kai?” He freezes in fear that he’s already been busted but tries to remain as quiet as possible. Eventually his fear is alleviated after he hears you whisper to yourself about how you just must be hearing things. Then he spots them, the pair of royal blue panties you left on the ground. Instantly he can begin to feel his heart beat out of his chest as he carries out with his plan by picking them up and stuffing them into the pocket of his pajama pants before leaving the bathroom as quietly as possible.

You’ve always taken a long time to shower so he knows he has plenty of time to do the rest. So he sits himself down on your bed, pulling your panties out of his pocket and lifting them up to his nose, taking in all of your scent. The divine fragrance making his ears pop out and big cock grow in his pants instantly. He begins to lick the wet spot on them from the access slick due to your ovulation, relishing in the taste of you and fantasizing what it would be like to have his head in between your thighs, lapping away at your warm pussy as you moan under his tongue. Before he knows it, he’s pulled his pants and boxers down and is fisting his leaking cock as he has the panties up to his nose.

He takes his precum and works it around his shaft like lube, moaning at every touch, and begins wrapping the panties around him, using the bright blue material as friction. Unable to help it as his mind starts to wonder about it being your hand around his cock right now, getting louder by the minute. “A-ahh… master… mmm fuck…” He’s so fucked out already he doesn’t even realize the water has turned off, you’ve finished your shower and quickly you put on your towel to go wake Kai, who you think is sleeping. Noticing whilst walking out your panties are gone and quickly as you open the door you notice exactly where they went. Your missing panties wrapped around his throbbing cock. Kai, too far gone and eyes shut, doesn’t even notice you watching, “Ooh fuuuck, m-master.”

For some reason seeing him like this is unexpectedly turning you on and you can’t help but stand and watch as he works your panties around his fat cock. He’s much bigger than you expected, the sight of him playing with his cock and the sound of his moans making your pussy wet. “Mmm… oh shit… fuck, oh master,” he moans out loudly and shamelessly and just hearing him moan master that one specific time makes your body need release. You lift the towel and begin gathering your slick, bringing your fingers to your mouth to suck them clean, enjoying the taste before rubbing circles around your clit. You lean back against the wall, watching him intently, you slide two fingers into your hole easily and slowly. Once you hit your G-spot you can’t help but let out a soft, but just audible enough, “Aah, pup.”

The moment you do, Kai’s ears perk up and his eyes fling open to look at you, who is now the one unaware of the other since your eyes are closed. Slowly he gets up, getting close to you, watching in awe for a second as you touch yourself. You jump slightly as he leans into your neck and leaves a soft kiss, whispering into your ear “You know, master, I had a whole apology ready for being a bad boy if you caught me, but now you seem to need me almost as much as I need you.” You say nothing as he lightly tugs at the towel “May I please take this off?” You stare at him for a second, he was always so polite, now not being an exception as he awaited your answer, circling his hand around your inner thigh. You let out a giggle at the tickling touch before saying “We really shouldn’t… but… please do.”

That’s all the wolf needs to hear as he removes your towel and picks you up gently to then lay you on the bed, underneath him. He lets out a light moan at the sight of you, his beloved master, all exposed for him. In almost a pathetic whimper he goes “Fuck, finally, I’ve wanted you like this since the maturity cycle started, master.” Then not even a second later, he shoves his head in between your legs and begins leaving sweet puppy licks in between every fold of your wet pussy. “O-o-pup,” you almost shriek at the sudden stimulation “all you had to do was ask if you needed help.” You say as you run your fingers through his beautiful blonde locks and leave light scratches behind his ears as he eats you out the best anyone ever has. The boy lifts his head up, eyes already glossy, his face soaking wet all around his mouth to ask “Really?” before sticking his face back into your pussy. “Y-y-yes, anything for you baby.” You say lovingly in a near moan. “Then cum for me” Kai says into you, going back and forth from sucking harshly on your clit and teasing your hole with his tongue, his nose rubbing your nub when focusing on your hole. Watching your every move. “F-fuck, oh shit, pup, you’re gonna make master-“ “Please, cum for me, mommy.” Between how well he was eating you out, his words vibrating on your clit and his sudden use of mommy, you absolutely lost it, coming undone around him and cumming intensely on his tongue. Feeling your eyes roll back into your head, screaming his name so loud you knew if the other boys were awake they knew exactly what was going on. But that didn’t stop him from sucking your clit until it was swollen, until he knew you were coming down from your high.

Before you could even say anything he looked up from in between your legs, desperation in his voice, “Please let me make you a mommy.” You didn’t even know what to say to that but Kai didn’t leave any time to respond before saying “Please, I wanna fill your pussy up with my cum, mommy.” He began to get closer, moving up the bed, sounding even more desperate to the point he was basically whining “I wanna give you my puppies, wanna cum in my mommy’s pussy so bad.” Words you never thought you’d hear your sweet little pup say but you’d be lying if you said it didn’t turn you on immensely, making your pussy throb for him. Instead of letting him know that you just chuckled and went “Oh? You wanna make me a mommy? Want your cum dripping out of my hole, pup?” In a teasing voice. Kai bit his lip, nodding quickly as he stared into your eyes intently with those big brown puppy eyes of his. It was hard to believe at a moment like this he was a wolf hybrid and not just a dog hybrid. “Fuck, please.” He said, as he sank his head to leave kisses in between your breasts. “Okay, but you have to be a good wolf then.”

“I’m always good” he said in an almost upset voice, as if you were implying there are times he is not. But his near offended nature quickly went away as he ripped his shirt off and lined up his big, throbbing cock with your entrance. He began to slowly insert himself, being as gentle as possible, but due to his size, just his tip alone made your eyes roll back into your head. At this point you were also becoming desperate, moaning out “Just get it in there, already.” “Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you.” He said. “You won’t, trust me, I’ll tell you if it’s too much.” Kai looked at you as he gripped onto your waist with his big hands “Promise?” “Promise.” “Now just make me a mommy please.” Those words alone was enough for him to absolutely unintentionally manhandle you as he bottomed out in you, stretching open your walls to take him. You screamed which instantly made Kai have a worried look on his face. Until you moaned out “Oooohhhhh fuuuuck… good boy.” When the worried look turned to a grin of pride that he could make his master like this.

“You like that?” He asked as he started speeding up his thrusts. “Yes…” you muttered out barely audible between yours and, mostly Kai’s, moans and loud squelching sounds of his fat cock in your wet pussy. He began to hold your hands down and lean over your body so he could kiss you and whisper in your ear how beautiful you’ll look as a mommy as he borderline abused your cunt. His blonde locks becoming wet and falling into his eyes as his pretty ears and tail began to twitch. Speeding up so much, you genuinely feared that he might break the bed with all the creaking. At this point he had you in a mating press, breeding you so deep and fast, hitting your G-spot every time with the fat tip of his cock, making you wail. You could feel yourself dangerously close to cumming and so could he as your gummy walls clenched around him. “F-uck, I’m close!” “Me too” he groaned in response. “Go on pup, impregnate master, make her a mommy.” You yelled. And with that you came undone, and so did Kai, releasing his seed into you with a sharp thrust, leaning into your chest as your walls fluttered around him.“O-oh master, fuck, there you go, take my puppies.”

With so much stimulation he collapsed onto the bed next to you, his cock slipping out of your hole on it’s own. Despite it being very, very good, at this point you became needy for more so without a second thought you begin stroking his cock to make it hard again. Dazedly he looked up at you and asked “Not enough? You need more, master?” You felt something take over you as you responded with “The name is mommy.” Quickly you got on top and put his cock back in your now creamy hole, beginning to bounce on it. “I’ll take that as a yes then, mommy.” He giggled as he watched your pussy spread his cum on his cock like lube. “Well, I have to make sure you got me pregnant, pup” you say. Kai nodded and sat up, wrapping his arms around you, nuzzling his face into your neck so he could leave bright marks on it, squishing your boobs against his broad chest in the process. Slowly reaching down to grab your ass whilst thrusting up into your hole. “God, my cum makes the best lube, but now I fear it’s leaking out too much.” He said softly into your ear. “Guess I’ll just have to fill this cunt up again.” He said in a near growl whilst bouncing you on his fat cock, furry ears tickling your face as he sucked on the sweet spot on your neck. “Fuck, right there” you whined as his right hand came up to wrap around your throat. At this point he was slamming your pussy so hard that his cum from before was splashing out onto his lap. That’s when you felt him shake, “Breed me full,” you said and before you knew it his warm load filled you up again as he bit your neck. You then screamed and began to cum yourself, pulling his mouth off your neck to look him in the eyes, “That’s my good boy.” You said as your hands cupped his sweaty face before leaning in to press a passionate kiss on his lips.

At that point you both were so tired you laid down onto the bed, your body still on top of Kai’s, him in still your hole. “You feel better now, baby?” You asked hazed. “Much.” He replied. To which he covered you both up with a blanket to take a nice needed nap. But not before you exchanged mutual ‘I love you’s,’ certain that definitely fixed his issues as you both fell asleep. More than happy to help him again if he ever needs it.

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