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#fluffy dumpling’s poem box
fluffyydumplings · 20 days
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Like A Painting - 그림처럼
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A/N: I wrote this a year ago.. the reason why there is a korean title attached here as well is because… well… the inspiration behind this poem was actually the saying 그림처럼.. a phrase used often when someone gazes upon something of beauty.. anyways.. anyhow.. happy women’s day.. I hope you enjoy
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She refuses to accumulate deep within her a child
You’ll regret it, they start with
What are you without your womb, they end indirectly with
What am I without myself, she thinks
For as she buttons up her skin and rises above their heads
She realises
They’ll never see her as the woman with wings as her reflection speaks
On the ground, in their convoluted minds she’ll always be
But what can a few convulsions and conversations of the what-nots and what-ifs not fix
And even if stagnant on the ground she remains
Standing is a feat that she can always beat herself to
And in that way
She’ll never be below them
For, even if she has to crawl her way back up
She refuses to lay lifeless on the ground
She’s been doing it for quite too long
After a while, you get weary and tired of doing anything
So, imagine not doing anything,
So, imagine being nothing but a pretty caricature on the walls
Imagine
Imagine how paralysing it would be for a human to stay still and play pretend
As a painting
As a picture
As an ideal
Her whole life she was expected to play a role
The altruistic mother who cradles her child to sleep,
The elder sister who stands as still as a mountain for her family to reach the sky
The deligent coworker who gets pushed aside despite building empires with her bare hands
But seasons come and go
And change is good for the heart
Therefore, she refuses to stick to the ground
Therefore, she refuses
No..
Therefore, she clearly will not be sticking to the strange principles that have been injected into her head
It’s all she has known
That was what she thought
But the world is broad
And all she has known is not all that is to know
They say that is how life is supposed to be for people like her
But everyday a tadpole learns how to jump and a caterpillar learns how to fly
For as they say, pain is the mother of success
Change is the mother of survival
Better and bolder
Brighter and Wiser
People grow
People age
People learn
People crawl
People walk
People run
People find ways to fly
They are peasants with high hats pretending to be Confucius
But filial piety is not much of a pity compared to all the bruises on her heart that they cannot see
So she leaps away
Away from the beautiful painting she has been entrapped in
For even with perfect strokes you cannot overlook the mistakes of this stupid ideal that have been glossed over with paint
She stares at the world she has known
She walks away
For all that she has known
Is not all that is to know
For all that she has believed to be true
Is not all that is true
This painting isn’t warm
This painting isn’t cold
Her forehead is warm
Her hands are cold
But..
She’ll recover
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fluffyydumplings · 4 months
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You Are Love
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You have brought upon me a sense of warmth that is akin to that of a boiling cup of tea
So many layers to your love and the words that you carry along with that beautiful crease of your lips
You don’t need a dash of cream or sugar for your grandeur to wash me away with awe
For only the sweet traces of the dried lavender leaves that is you has caved its way into the trapdoors of my intricate heart
And not the bitter lies and whispers people have deluded themselves into believing
My darling
A boiling cup of tea when waited for patiently
Eases me into a state of pure solace
The waft of the delicate layers that constitute who you are seeping into my very soul
Branching its way to my fragile mind and entangling a flower wreath into the twines of my unsightly thoughts
A water droplet of condensation ushering me into a pathway littered with bottled messages of ardency
So utterly compelling, I dissociate into puddles of love
My darling
A boiling cup of tea when consumed right away
Burns the width of my very tongue and leaves me in a state of bewilderment
The convoluted and concentrated love that you bring upon everyone that knows of you
So dauntingly illustrated in the presence of your burning gaze that it leaves me speechless like a gasping grey robin perching on the branch of a eucalyptus tree
My darling
A boiling cup of tea once rendered cold
Thaws its way to the burning heat of my apprehension and mistrust in mortals
The chilling truth of your very perspective and interpretation of life that I will never find anywhere else but in that of flowers that die for the sake of another to bloom in its beloved patch of dirt
So hauntingly incomprehensible that I can’t help but drip cerulean tears into the unapproachable cup of tea in my dust-cluttered hands
My darling
There will never be a being like you ever again
My darling
You have brewed and instilled all of the humanity and ideologies that make up all I am now
My darling
No words are enough to describe you
My darling
You are love
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A/N: This poem is written for Kim Namjoon, and only Kim Namjoon
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fluffyydumplings · 7 months
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QUEEN
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I’m the queen of this castle,
A heinous figure,
And yet they call me, your highness
This power within the grasp of my hands is the greatest feat of my life,
Yet as they bow at my feet,
I may be above,
But the crown on my head keeps me grounded
It does not humble me down,
But it reminds me of the feelings of the common,
But it reminds me to be prudent of whatever I do
Whether it be trepidation that lands them at my feet,
Whether it be veneration that lands them at my feet,
Whether it be obligation that lands them at my feet,
I am the bearer of this land,
But I too can be the harbinger of its doom
They compare me to Venus,
But my veins run cold,
They say I am akin to water,
But this is a slaughterhouse
And my kingdom is a well,
I’ll drain out one day,
And they’ll scoop fresh water over my remains
I’m the queen of this kingdom,
A courteous figure,
And yet my court is filled with traitors
I’m the queen of this land,
A lender of ascendancy,
And yet they believe I am a leader of competency,
One day my hand slips,
My crown crushes my skull,
And I can’t handle it all,
So I fall
I’m the queen of this facade,
An arcade full of flies,
And yet they believe I am a blooming flower,
But I’m wilted,
So I crumble,
And that is all
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fluffyydumplings · 10 months
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ALICE
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I sometimes feel like I’m in wonderland,
My borderline like a looking glass,
But unlike Alice,
I can’t seem to cross through,
For I’m already stuck at the other side,
I guess, I’m in borderland,
But, this isn’t Tokyo,
It’s simply my mind,
My consciousness,
My subconsciousness,
Whatever it be
Sometimes the mad hatter,
Sometimes the queen of hearts,
Yelling off with your head,
Screaming like that
Sometimes the Cheshire cat,
Sometimes the white rabbit
Grinning wide with teeth,
Running late like that
But most of all,
I guess,
I’m sometimes the eat me cookie,
That forgot to be baked
But then again why does it matter,
When I won’t realise I’m any of this,
But then again why does it matter,
When I won’t remember any of this
In my heart I’m just sitting on a field of grass,
Reading a book and having tea,
I guess,
All that is real,
All that happens,
Simply feels like something of dreams,
Something of nightmares,
Something in my head,
I guess,
I’m just like that
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fluffyydumplings · 11 months
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Time
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Time,
It’s hastily sweeping away everything I’ve ever known,
I feel it,
The tide of the moon that makes memories rise and fall,
The way of the waves that plunge me deep and fixed in remembrance,
Time,
It’s quickly washing away all the things I’m slowly becoming familiar with
Time,
It doesn’t strike me,
It doesn't bombard me with questions,
It doesn’t inform me,
Whether of its arrival,
Whether of its departure..
And as the moments of my life diverges from the deepest pits of my mind,
I cry,
While time.. it sighs at me,
Time,
It’s like a plane that sometimes silently takes off on time,
It’s like a plane that sometimes is late with no notice or remarks,
It’s like a plane that hasn’t landed but is already here
Time,
It’s like a plant that grows against the source of light,
It’s like a semicolon that keeps on flying forward even though I’ve already cut off one of its wings
Time,
I used to fold paper aeroplanes and pray they would fly further than I ever could,
Then one day.. I grew,
I laid down and the distance my paper plane flew was a quarter of the size of my dainty limbs,
My desk once filled with half-done assessments replaced with the half-empty visions of dreams I am yet to fulfil,
But this glass is full,
And as it tips over,
Time is cold,
Although sand is gold,
Stories unfold,
Memories untold,
I tuck my chin in and fold myself up into a ball,
For I am a crumpled piece of paper in the grasp of a puppeteer called time
Time,
It surrounds me,
Reaching the tip of my pelvis which would have been where my shoulders peaked at years ago,
I’m an electrode surrounded by molten liquid,
I’m a human in a field of tall grass ready to swallow me alive,
Time,
The last drop never comes,
The glass tips over again,
And the first drop begins again
Time,
So much of it has passed
Time
I’m now only semi-scared of you,
For what can I do,
Can’t stop a running man from running,
Can’t stop a colon that can no longer fly, from walking
Time,
Even if I strip you off of your wings,
Leave you with no limbs,
You’d still crawl your way to me somehow
Time,
You’re cruel,
But I’m no fool,
It’s already pass noon again,
It’ll be nighttime soon,
I guess,
I’ll just have to walk while you crawl
Time,
I shouldn’t be scared of you,
Nor will I be scared of you
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fluffyydumplings · 11 months
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Society
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A child who eats as though the world is out to get him,
For deep somewhere in what is left of his heart,
He knows that food on the table is not stable,
But one’s cradle against the hard-luck folks of the impoverished nations,
And he might as well get himself stapled to the dirt-ground,
For his famine is nothing but an example of someone’s never-ever,
Even if it’s as real as reality,
Even if it’s as real as his empty gut,
Even if it’s as real as his dormant limbs,
A hooker who taught herself how to fish,
For the world just couldn't let her live,
They call her a prostitute,
Say it's a bad attribute,
But isn’t the world made up of different institutes that leave people destitute,
So why have that attitude,
Always catching her in its faulty net,
But never consuming her whole,
Always letting her go,
But never letting her breathe,
Putting a tracker to trail every little plunge she takes,
Pointing rods to condemn every little dive she takes,
She has to feed herself though,
In order for her children to be fed,
So through the ocean she will never stop paddling,
Even if her eyes fade blue,
And even if one day they stop letting her go
A man who drinks as though he has nowhere to go,
For that isn’t far from the life he carries,
Even the beer in his hand is starting to be far less cold than the icy truth,
It isn’t that he has no home to go to,
It’s that home doesn't feel like home ,
It’s that his head is a ticking metronome,
He swears there’s something wrong with his chromosomes,
He swears that his phylum isn’t chordate,
For he searches hard and wide,
But he for sure has no backbone,
Even his nerves are wired wrong,
Not the way the streets connect their bulbs,
Not with the risks of a short circuit like him,
So he sips slow and unhurried,
For what would the world want to do with a squashed date,
Can’t even plug his chords straight,
I guess, he’ll never belong
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fluffyydumplings · 1 year
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The Lost Souls Of Greed
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Gold is the sparkle of one’s eye
While dirt is what fills the empty cresses of one’s stomach
One will mine until the earth is sunken and void of anything
And another will scrape away to blossom their yield of spring
The saying comes and goes
You harvest what you grow
You receive what you give
But my dear, the earth isn’t hollow
And you reap what you sow
The gold you desire will come to a halt with the pieces of earth you assault
The blossoms you yearn for will come to an end with the trees that no longer bend
Desire is putting everything and anything as collateral with fate
But it isn’t a house that is in jeopardy
It is much more
It is much less
It is what keeps you breathing
It is anything that makes you happy
It is a single sliver of your favourite book
It is an entire shelf of your mismatched life
For a being that runs too deep into the woods
Is a being with lost limbs
For a being that climbs too far up into the mountains
Is a being with stolen breath
But, oh
What do you call a being who runs with both their eyes closed
Desire guiding them onto a broke cliff edge
A human?
A figment of your imagination?
Both you and I?
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fluffyydumplings · 2 years
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Iris
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You’re like a coniferous tree
Standing there
Beautiful, daunting yet blending in with a sea of others
But even in a sea of the same sunken symphony of greens
I only see you
For only you.. know how to bring light into my life
My beautiful iris
Even winter can’t make you wither away
Even winter can’t take your beauty away
The proof lies in my eyes
For without you I cannot see colours
Only light.. only light
Shades of grey and a multitude of broken things
You accommodate me to the world my broken soul cannot bear
You’re like a bear chasing away the nightmares in my life
You pull me tight
So I am close
You spread your love
So I’m far away from the rest of the world
And only relative to you, my beautiful Iris
I am hurt without you
I am alive but nothing without you
I can see without you
But am I but.. anything without you
You protect me from the world
You colour me purple
You colour me blue
And I sparkle in the rays of the burning sun
As water droplets refract
As the mimosas retract
As the rainbows reinact
The play of love
I see you by my side
My beautiful iris
Who said I’d have to get to the other side of the rainbow just to see you?
Fuck
Red
Orange
Yellow
Green
Blue
And
Indigo
All I care about is you
All I know is you
My beautiful Iris
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fluffyydumplings · 1 year
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Boxes of Hope
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You’d never expect for the sun to rise from the west
But if you close your eyes
You can pretend North is South
West is East
That the sun prompts darkness
And that the moon prompts light
You’d never expect for roses to bloom in winter
But winter roses exist and beyond your ill-wishing
They bloom
They blossom
And thrive in the cold
For if you close your eyes a little
And wish
And hope
And believe
Whether in the impossible
Or the improbable of life
One day they will come to you
True
And
Beyond the crater of your imagination
For in this box
There is sorrow
There is greed
There is death
There is madness
But most of all
There is hope
The hope in within you
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fluffyydumplings · 9 months
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Flowers of Resentment
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TW: Generational Trauma (please do not proceed if you are not comfortable with this topic)
Phew, Only a few of my misfortunes are back to haunt me,
I thought they would all linger in the air,
Diffuse from where they were last left,
Into my semi-permeable head,
And I’d let it all in,
Let it become part of me again,
Yet as I tilt my head closer to the beginning of all my pain,
Nothing comes rushing back to me,
Only the numbing residue of the iron that once scorched the delicate of my skin
Mother.. was like a doll trying to heal herself with a dull blade,
Stabbing in different places and angles to test the waters,
I was her little angel,
I was her little flower bud,
But I was also that terribly broken and dull blade
As she used me to close her open wounds,
Her lungs that she pierced became infected with thorns,
And around it blossomed the many flowers of resentment that she would forever foster,
The spring that comes and go stealing her breath away just as it did mine,
And not in the way that the flowers breathed of life
‘These flowers that you grow..’ she silently cried,
For as she bandaged up her chest,
She only reached for my hands and not for that of an embrace,
‘They are killing me..’ she sobbed,
And with that,
I bleed with ease
Mother.. was a doll dressing a human up in her clothes,
It felt like therapy,
It was a great remedy,
But it was an overkill,
An overdose of pills,
For her feet are tied,
And through the human she lives,
Vicariously...
Carelessly..
Hopelessly..
But,
I don’t hate mother,
It’s impossible to do so,
For even,
As she watches me bleed till the brink of death,
She cuts away a piece of her torso to keep me content,
She was selfless yet selfish,
Not knowing that all I needed was the warm caress of her hands on my heavy shoulders
Mother.. Was a doll who did not understand the language of humans,
Nor, will she ever learn,
But she tries,
I.. Was a human who did not understand the language of dolls,
Nor, will I ever learn,
But I try
Mother… was a doll who tried living vicariously through me,
But.. mum,
She isn’t a doll..
She’s only human
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fluffyydumplings · 2 years
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My Spring Lies in You
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You’re like flowers descending from the sky to my lane flooded in grim,
The fact that you exist is good enough to paint my empty eyes with vibrant colours of hope,
Your hands that I cannot feel in mine are probably warmer than a cup of hot cocoa,
Just like your heart that radiates warmth the sun cannot match,
For as the blue lilacs continue to bloom in spring,
You envelop me in utter satisfaction and fondness
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fluffyydumplings · 3 years
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A Butterfly’s Beauty
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You spread your wings so wide that the sky is a mere bystander to the phenomenon that is you,
Is it because of how you’re tired of your days as a caterpillar?
Or is it because it’s in your nature to be beautiful and beguiling as you are?
For now that beauty is yours you use it ever so wisely,
And I’ve fallen for every inch of you,
Not just the bewitching creature you have become,
But your spirit, essence, and existence as a being in this world filled with beasts ready to slaughter me,
For your beauty is encapsulated within you,
And not the vibrant colours that decorate you,
Or the way you carry yourself ever so elegantly across the horizon,
It's the way you pollinate the flowers around you with kindness,
And how you warm up my soul like the sunlight heats the ground in tenderness
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fluffyydumplings · 2 years
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Flower
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The tip of my pen is permanent on paper, just as you are in this head of mine
The crack in your heart that is filled with gold,
And the love in your eyes that goes oceans deep,
They all might wait for sakuras in spring,
But I have you right by my side,
The flower that has honey dripping from its lips,
The flower that is worth a decade waiting for,
And the flower whose petals etch my skin with its undying fragrance of hope
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fluffyydumplings · 3 years
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Sky
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The stunning shade of blue and orange that intertwines,
The soft strokes of white paint across your tainted surface,
Like fear and anger combined your beauty outshines even the brightest constellation of stars,
My heart feels tender and warm at your presence,
For as you hover above me I am contented,
The undying hues of your nature beyond what I can fathom,
The unpredictable shift of your ambience leaving me in awe,
For you bewitching sky far from my very grasp enchant me beyond my control
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Poem Box
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fluffyydumplings · 2 years
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Midnight
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If I smile, will I be happy?
If I laugh, will I be okay?
Is happiness something I can achieve to begin with?
For as the clock strikes midnight
My empty eyes and passive face remains the same
Tomorrow is a new day, but will I be able to fall asleep tonight?
Will I be able to live to see tomorrow?
Does tomorrow even exist?
For as the clock strikes midnight
My heart just gets emptier and emptier
What have I done today?
What have I done in this life?
I can’t do anything
I can’t do nothing
Even the poem I poured my soul into lacks sincerity
For as the clock strikes midnight
I contemplate whether I deserve to live
What if I can do so much more?
What if there’s someone I could have met?
These things stop me from tying a rope around my neck
For as the clock strikes midnight
I decide to live for another day
Even if it’s painful
And even if I don’t want to
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