#for some reason i have been feeling anxious about this blog so using the queue will probably hep | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

whatiwillsay · 4 years

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submission: we need to talk about ttb (spade-riddles)

Hey Cam. Seeing that ask defending TTB’s doxxing has sort of pushed me to finally share some of my story on Tumblr, I guess. I haven’t had the opportunity to talk about this to anyone fully, so this will probably be long, but I hope you don’t mind me venting.

I’m one of the people that got emailed by TTB. I don’t feel comfortable posting this off anon, but I was in a Discord server with you and @bisluthq and some other people back in Dec/Jan. I don’t know if you remember me, but my name on there was one word and began with an L and ended with an S.

I want to share the full story, but I also don’t feel comfortable with sharing certain details publicly because I’m still very wary of getting outed further by her if she sees this, so I’m gonna be vague about some things

Request to her followers — If you see this, please don’t send this to her. Like I’m genuinely asking you not to because I don’t trust her not to cross any more lines. My dad is a major homophobe with serious anger issues who has literally been arrested for violence before, and she doesn’t really think carefully or maybe even care about how any actions she takes could lead to people being harmed, so I’m not eager to see how she might react.

Anyway, I first got an email back in December, and I was really freaked out by it at first. I spoke to one of my mutuals about it, and although we both agreed it was super weird and invasive and creepy, we ended up trying to see the funny side of it. So, I kinda just brushed it off and moved on. I was mainly just really confused about why I had been targeted because at the time, I thought it was only me who’d gotten an email like that. I didn’t understand why she’d specifically targeted me instead of other people who she clearly disliked a lot more.

About a week later, I saw someone on Tumblr mentioning a strange email, and I realised other people must have gotten them too. I spoke to Nat about what happened to me and ended up in the Discord

At the time, I felt like I’d gotten off really easy comparatively to others because I initially didn’t realise that she’d contacted anyone else. And so I tried to act chill about it because I didn’t want to make things about me, but honestly, I was extremely anxious. I felt on edge for over a week. I would keep checking her blog again and again because I was super worried that she would post our personal details publicly. I scrolled through my entire blog from start to finish and deleted a lot of posts that were either personal or that I just didn’t want anyone I knew in real life to read.

This part I have to be vague about because it would basically give away who I am, but it was only a while later when I thought I was in the clear that someone I knew in real life texted me and mentioned seeing a weird email about me. The email had been sent a while back, and they’d been shown it by the original recipient/s. Multiple people had been shown it, but luckily (kinda), only two of those people were actually people I saw on a regular basis

I’m mostly closeted, but I’m kind of technically out to a few of my immediate family members. But it’s very much a DADT situation because they’re not accepting, and they like to just pretend I’m straight. And so I basically have to act closeted even when I’m around them, and I can’t even ALLUDE to being gay.

But with my dad, it’s different. He’s very homophobic. I’m only gonna mention this next part so that people understand what kind of dangerous situation that TTB could have put me in. (And the other people that she doxxed too because she didn’t know how safe their individual situations were). It’s all really personal, and I wouldn’t ordinarily feel comfortable sharing any of this at all, even anonymously, but I think it needs to be said because her actions were extremely fucking irresponsible.

Right, so when I first “came out” to my dad, it was actually an accident, and he reacted… extremely badly. This was back in like… 2018 or 2019, I can’t remember the exact year

(TW // physical abuse, homophobia)

He was extremely angry, literally shaking. He yelled at me, he described in graphic detail how he was going to “break every bone in my body”, “strangle the life out of me”, “drown me”, etc. He kept telling me that I’m disgusting and going to Hell, you get the idea. He was having a lot of fun with making strangling motions and stabbing motions with his hands, and he kept slamming his hand onto the table. That went on for about 15 minutes, and then he stood up and threw a chair from the dining table at me. That was fun lol. And he punched me in the head pretty hard which kinda knocked me back. I felt dizzy, I had to sit down on the floor. At that point, my mum who had been crying and asking him to stop physically intervened, and he ended up storming out of the house instead. My mum’s a genuinely good person btw. She’s a little homophobic, but she cares about me a lot, and I’m very grateful for her. She hates him too, but she’s kinda stuck with him… It wasn’t her fault

He literally hates gay people. He complains about us on the regular. One time, he threw the remote at the TV and cracked the screen just because there was a gay male couple kissing onscreen. Another time, he threw a rock at a gay man on the street. There was also a time where he forced a few of my siblings (who didn’t want to do it) to throw peeled oranges out of the window at people celebrating pride while he drove past them and yelled insults at them. He found that really funny. Anyway, I’m sure you guys get the idea of what kind of person he is

He hasn’t laid a hand on anybody in several months though, so I do think he’s trying to be better at least. Like he’s still verbally abusive and controlling and awful, but I appreciate that he’s at least making an effort to calm down with the hitting and kicking and stuff

Anyway, with my dad, it’s less DADT and more that I think he’s got it in his head that he managed to scare me into “seeing the error of my ways” and that I’ve “stopped choosing to be gay” and that I’m now straight. So, if it had been HIM who had gotten that email, it would’ve been like… extremely bad. Like I’m getting anxious just thinking about it. And this is why I’m so angry at TTB. It was extremely, extremely irresponsible of her to not consider these kinds of possibilities before she sent out her stupid emails. She’s supposed to be an ally, but it didn’t even cross her mind that these emails would lead to people being outed and possibly even harmed?? It’s not okay at all. I’m just very grateful that she didn’t send one to him because I don’t even know what kind of situation I would be in right now.

Anyway, enough about my fucking awful dad… I feel uncomfortable that I even typed all of that out, but I wanted people to understand how dangerous her actions could have been. Like I mean, my dad’s got PTSD and extreme anger issues from his teenage years, so I do try not to judge him TOO harshly, but there’s no excuse for being a huge bigot or occasionally violent. The idea of him being the one who got that email is still so scary to me. Like my heart is racing just thinking about it

One of the people that DID read the email was the male friend I mentioned earlier though. He was shown it by someone else for a particular reason, and he was a very important person to me. Like he was a good guy, we were close, he helped me out with certain personal issues I have and is one of only two people that I know in real life that I felt comfortable confiding in about them. We’d always meet up once a week, sometimes twice, and we’d just talk about stuff and make an effort to help each other out with things. Like he was very important to me.

It turns out that he’d looked through my blog before I’d got around to scrubbing it, and he asked me if I was gay in person the next time we met up. I couldn’t lie because like… he’d have known I was lying right to his face. So, I told him I was, and you should have seen his face. It made me feel so awful about myself. He looked really stunned and shocked and kinda uncomfortable. Like it got so awkward, and I started rambling and making things worse. He was avoiding eye contact, and my voice was shaking.

I ended up making up an excuse to leave about 5 mins later and had an actual anxiety attack. Again, this is embarrassing and something I’d never usually talk about online, but I just want to get it all off my chest so that I can move past it all.

So, I was like on the verge of tears (I don’t cry easily), I couldn’t breathe properly, I was pacing around the building, and I just wanted to escape, so I headed straight for the doors. There was a queue of about 100 people lined up and waiting to leave, and I couldn’t think straight or breathe and just needed to be outside, so I tried to go out through the other exit which is for staff only. The security guard stopped me and basically publicly humiliated me in front of all of those people. He loudly shamed me and said I “didn’t have any decency” for attempted to jump the queue, lectured me in this really condescending tone, and then sent me right to the back of that huge line. Meanwhile, I was literally in the midst of a bad anxiety attack.

And then I eventually got outside and had to call my mum to come and pick me up instead of just making my own way home like I usually do. She’s amazing though tbh because she actually came to get me and didn’t even question why. I had to skip all of my plans for the rest of the day and instead just hid upstairs in my bedroom with the lights off until the next day. I refused to tell any of my family members what had happened even though they kept asking. I just felt so, so awful, and my anxiety was through the roof

To be honest, before that happened, my mindset was like: “I mean, if I get outed, it obviously wouldn’t be good, but I think I’d be able to deal with it fine”. But then, when it actually happened, and I saw the way my close friend reacted, I had like a whole emotional breakdown lol. It’s like, you think you’d be fairly chill in a situation, but when it actually happens, your reaction can be really unpredictable. I was so embarrassed by everything about that entire incident. I didn’t even want to show my face the next day.

It’s been almost two months since that happened, and in that entire time, my friend has contacted me once. We literally used to meet up once or twice a week (and during lockdown, we’d do video calls or phone calls instead), but since then, we’ve barely even spoken. Things are just so awkward now. I know this sounds stupid, but I feel like TTB’s taken one of my best friends away from me. I don’t think he’s a homophobe or anything, he has openly gay friends and is fairly accepting, but I think it’s just the way that he found out that has just made things so weird between us now. I feel like if I’d had the chance to come out to him myself in my own way, he wouldn’t have reacted like that. But I’m gonna text him next week and see if we can maybe try to fix our friendship, but I doubt it at this point

The other people who were shown the email, I mostly just avoid. I don’t really care about them knowing that much because I wasn’t close to them, but it’s just really embarrassing knowing that they probably scrolled through my Tumblr blog before I scrubbed it

And about Tumblr… This used to be the only place that I could fully be myself. It was like a “safe space” for me which feels ironic now. But I haven’t been active on my blog since December. I still lurk occasionally, but I just don’t feel comfortable here anymore. I did consider deleting my current blog and starting afresh with a new one, but I don’t think it’d make much of a difference… Like she’s kind of ruined Tumblr for me. I do still enjoy reading people’s blogs every now and then, but I don’t feel relaxed here anymore, I just feel on edge.

It’s mainly the fact that SHE’S still here. She still has a platform, she still has a bunch of followers. It’s been so hard seeing her face next to no consequences whatsoever for the horrible things that she’s done to so many different people. And it upsets me that she hasn’t even acknowledged that what she did was wrong. Plus, it makes me feel even worse that the Hard Kay blogs and some other people are still supporting her and pretending that this whole thing just didn’t happen. Like do they just not care? Or is it that she’s twisted things and made them believe that the situation was different to what it actually was?

And tbh, this whole situation has even set me back in my own sort of personal self-acceptance journey. I had such bad internalised homophobia when I was younger, and it took me so many years to get to a place where I had mostly accepted myself. But now I just feel ashamed again, and I’ve gone back to my old habit of trying to force myself to be attracted to men. Like I downloaded Tinder the other day and set my preference to men and was swiping through profiles. It’s kinda silly actually. I did snap out of it and delete the app the next day though. But I don’t know, I feel like this whole thing has just kinda fucked with me a bit. I am trying to work this stuff out and get back to normal though. I think I’ll be good again in maybe a month or so, hopefully.

And… yeah. I just really resent her, and this situation upsets me. Because the reason she did this was so petty and ridiculous, and I guess she didn’t even realise how much it would impact people? Like I do know that my situation wasn’t as bad as some of the other people’s situations, and I feel really bad for them, and I hope they’re all doing okay. I can’t imagine what it must have been like for them. But it still has impacted me a lot more than I actually thought it would. I thought I’d get over it within a couple of weeks. But it’s been like two months, and I’m still not completely over it

I know it might not sound like a huge thing, but being outed really does affect you, even if it’s only to a few people. Because to me, I feel like I’ve had my sense of like, security and comfort taken away, and it’s kinda distressing. Sorry if I sound dramatic with any of this, I just really needed to say all of this stuff to other people besides myself lol

Like her actions have literally led to me being outed to a few people. A close friendship that I had has basically been ruined. I don’t feel comfortable or secure on Tumblr anymore, even though it used to be an important outlet for me. I’ve had a resurgence of anxiety about my sexuality. Etc.

And again, my dad is extremely homophobic and literally made death threats to me and physically attacked me back when I accidentally came out to him in 2018 or 2019. And if he had gotten that email, I don’t even know what would have happened. I don’t think he would have like… SERIOUSLY physically harmed me, but there would definitely have been a repeat of the first incident. More throwing chairs at me and hitting and screaming and death threats. I don’t really want to think about it.

It just bothers me that she didn’t even consider that? Like did it not even cross her mind? And my dad is bad, but I’m sure there are people in the fandom who have even worse parents, and she could have got one of those people instead. It’s just so… I don’t know, it’s just so frustrating to me.

Anyway, I just hate her for what she did… Like maybe I shouldn’t, but I really do resent her so much, and I don’t think I could forgive her even if she apologised to us all (which I don’t think she even would because she doesn’t seem to have any decency whatsoever). The least she could do is at least express some kind of remorse, but she just genuinely doesn’t care, and that’s super messed up. All over some stupid Tumblr blog that is much less important than she thinks it is.

But anyway… I apologise for the whole rant, and if anybody read all the way down to here, I appreciate it. I do actually feel a bit better now that I’ve got this all typed out. And I’m sorry for the oversharing lol, I usually don’t do this, but I just felt like I really needed to tell people and get it off my chest so that I can try to get over it — L

submisssion⬆️⬆️⬆️

ok L i am trying to remain calm here because this isn’t about me. but i am very emotional right now. i am so so so infinitely sorry that you had to go through this harrowing and terrifying experience. ttb (now blogging under spade-riddles) is absolutely disgusting, lower than dirt, that she would put your life, safety, and well-being at risk over a fucking kaylor blog.

please please please im me or get in touch somehow because i want to offer you support. have you been financially impacted by this? we can raise money. do you need therapy? we can help you find the support you need. this community is unequivocally here for you. whatever you need, if it’s in my power to help you get it, i will. you have my solemn promise on that.

i am so deeply and desperately sorry that you have gone through this. i was shaking while reading your story.

i am in touch with other people and we are in discussion about the best way to let tumblr know what happened. this will be a safe space for you (and all of us) again if it’s the last thing i do. this community is 100% here for you in any way we can help, sending you all the support and love we have.

#submission #tw: abuse #tw: homophobia

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emzchaos · 3 years

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check-in tag ✅⭐

thankyou for tagging me @sulaniturtles🥰

why did you choose your url?:

Ahh ok well I started this blog off as Sharksimz, then changed it to seviies (after my sim SE7VEN) then I left simblr for a six-month break. I came back and hated seviies and wanted to be funny. Awkwardlyhere was taken so I mixed my favorite flower the Orchid and added a lyhere.. It's a fucking pun and I hate myself every day.

any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them:

orchidlyfinds - For CC I like but am not at my PC

emziasraccoonadoption - Raccoon Adoptions

how long have you been on tumblr?:

This is my 7th year.. it doesn't feel that long but it has been

do you have a queue tag?:

Queue? Whats that?

why did you start your blog in the first place?:

Well it was a mix of filling a void of grief and diving into a many simblr blogs like @neopixiesims, @ellemant (When it was josiesimblr), @penelope-and-wonders, @beverlyallitsims, @eslanes, @shysimblr and some others but they are no longer posting or active. These blogs were my welcome and inspiration to start my first blog.

why did you choose your icon/pfp?:

It's Oakley, I don't need a reason really

why did you choose your header?:

It's Millie & Oakley as Young adults.

what’s your post with the most notes?:

My Pride Month edit with 118 notes :o

how many mutuals do you have?

I have so many, I lost count over the year

how many people do you follow?:

how many followers do you have?:

Just slightly under 1000

have you ever made a shitpost?:

All the fucking time lol

did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?:

Ahh I rather not say. I don't want to bring shit up.

how often do you use tumblr each day?:

I should be in bed but still up on tumblr soo uhh too often

how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?:

Depending on what it is. I have just given up on a pretty blog it's just trash and I reblog what I want to

do you like ask games?:

Yess!!!

do you like tag games?:

Yes, I don't always get to them because I really suck and get anxious no one will like me after I post them..

which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?:

@warmsol, @amelettes have you seen their sims! @berrysweetboutique, @klodas. @literalite, @klayde just a few but honestly I think in ways so many people are tumblr famous for having unique sims and great stories so maybe all my mutals are tumblr famous

do you have a crush on a mutual?:

Yes!! Every single one of them, their sim and stories are more worthy than my terrible story and posts lol (Self hating)

My tag victims - @pink-chevalier, @sienna-simmer, @kouzeesim, @cyazurai, @amelettes, @simsstuph, @erosims, @theplumblob, @lunchsims, @leafykii, @skylarsimsstories and anyone who sees's this I guess (I still suck at tagging)

#Check in tag #about my shitty blog #ooft

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psg-est-magique · 3 years

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Tumblr tag game

Thanks so much to my loves @kingkyks and @too-multifandom-to-function for tagging me! I love these ask games so much! I love you both so much! 🥺☺️

1. Why did you choose your url ?

I chose this url when Ney first signed for PSG. It was such a special time and I will never forget how warmly he was welcomed to this team. In the press conference on the day he was presented as a PSG player, Ney said “Paris est magique” // Paris is magic. He then proceeded to laugh and run off. So that’s how I got my url! It was just such a precious moment, maybe I will look up the video and try to post it.

2. Any side blogs ?

Nope! ❤️

3. How long have you been on tumblr ?

I have been on tumblr since 2014 because during the 2014 Brasil World Cup, I absolutely fell in love with Neymar and football so I made a tumblr to join the football fandom. I had a old blog when Ney played for Barça and then in 2017 I made this one. But in 2017 I left tumblr for a while. Finally, in 2020 when my heart was crushed by PSG losing the ucl final I came back to this blog so that I could have company in my misery. And the rest is history baby.

4. Do you have a queue tag ?

Nope! ❤️

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place ?

I wanted to start fresh with a new Neymar Jr/PSG/Brasil NT blog because although I met amazing and sweet Barcelona fans, their fandom became a bit toxic for me especially when Ney left in 2017. It made me sad the way they would speak about him which is a big reason why I left tumblr for a bit around that time.

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp ?

Okay so I remember this photo perfectly! It was in summer 2020 when the players came back to France to play matches after the first quarantine and I was so excited!!! I just love this photo so much, I love it when Ney smiles so big and bright like this and his eyes get all scrunched up. I just love to see him smile, and I love it when he’s happy and healthy, I thank God for his smile, health, and happiness. Ney is just so precious!

Although I love this picture so much, I think I want to change it soon but I’m hesitant to because icons are like identifiers. Honestly I don’t think I’m going to change it for a while though.

7. Why did you choose your header ?

I chose this one because it is just absolutely gorgeous, have you seen it?! I love it and I’ve always dreamed of going to Paris. It is also a photo from our win against Dortmund in 2020 when we qualified to the quarter finals. This win and this day is one of my favorite memories as a PSG fan, it was such a special time.

8. What’s your post with the most notes ?

I am not sure at all honestly, I think it might be the post about Leo Paredes and Ney sharing a blanket and watching a PSG match together at Ney’s house. It was such an adorable moment, this team is really such a family and I love them all so much!! 🥰🥰☺️❤️

9. How many mutuals do you have ?

Hmmmmm I’m not sure, I would say about 5! But I love my entire little PSG family. You all have my heart.

10. How many followers do you have ?

93! Almost 100! But it’s not about followers, tumblr is just a really nice safe place to express myself about the what I truly love. And I have met some of the most amazing people on here! Like my best friend @too-multifandom-to-function ❤️❤️

11. How many people do you follow ?

I follow 79 blogs and before I follow someone I always make sure they are at the very least neutral about PSG and Neymar and don’t say nasty things about them because that honestly makes me really sad.

12. Have you ever made a shit post ?

Um I do not think so, I usually just rant about football related things that make me upset in some way. I guess that sort of counts as shit posting. 😅

13. How often do you use tumblr a day ?

I don’t know the exact amount of time but I like scrolling through tumblr a few times a day to check the out what’s going on in the football world. I also love coming on here to talk to @kingkyks !❤️❤️

14. Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog ?

I have had a few disagreements as I am very defensive of the people and things I love. So when people just unjustly attack Neymar or PSG or any of our players I usually get upset. Most times I let it go because I don’t like to be mean and I think energy is better spent by sending love to our players. But sometimes I’m like nah baby it’s on and I have to say something and defend my boys.

15. How do you feel about the ‘you need to reblog’ posts ?

I really dislike those posts, I feel like people are already so anxious, so why make it worse by getting into their heads. Plus it’s just annoying.

16. Do you like tag games ?

Yes I love tag games, I think they are so fun. Also I love it when think of me and tag me!!

17. Do you like ask games ?

I love ask games too, I like to send people asks for ask games. Sadly I don’t really get many asks when I do those things but it’s okay, it’s all in good fun!

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous ?

@holdmyhopeinyourhands @kingkyks @amelmajrii

I just love these three so much, I always checked their blogs even when I was off tumblr. They are my tumblr famous celebrities and I love them! ❤️

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual ?

I have a crush on all of my mutuals I love every single last one of them! Mwah! 😘

20. Tags

@tmnteshk @amelmajrii @sevyntwentyfour @msn-forever @holdmyhopeinyourhands and anyone else who wants to do this!

Love you guys all so much!! ❤️❤️

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blossom-hwa · 3 years

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I’m back! (07/24/21)

Hi everyone! It’s been almost three weeks since I went on hiatus, and during that time, I’ve thought about this blog/my writing and have decided what I’m going to do with this. I can’t keep going as I did before so I am making changes to the way I run my blog, which I will detail below under the cut. This includes updates about unfinished series and possible future events, so if you’re interested, please continue reading! Otherwise, just know that I am back :)

First things first, I have decided that I will no longer run a queue. The queue used to be a nice way for me to schedule all of the works I’ve completed so that I don’t have to monitor when they post. However, it’s since become a source of stress for me because I was getting inordinately anxious/worried when the queue started running out and I didn’t have more work to put up. From now on, I will still keep a list of completed works so readers can have an idea of what I may post in the future, but there won’t be any concrete post dates unless it’s a series that updates on certain days of the week or a special fic that will be posted for a birthday or anniversary. I will post when I like, but if there’s something you’d like to see posted first, send an ask and I’ll keep that in mind :)

Second, I have some updates on my writing. I’ll bullet the specific ones below.

Whispers of Nature is officially going on a pause. I love the series, I really do, but I haven’t had inspiration to write for it in a very long time (over half a year) and keeping it at the back of my mind only stresses me out. It’s really been on pause since I finished Brave, but I’m making it official now. I will return to it (or not) whenever inspiration hits again.

Angels and Demons is officially on hiatus, probably more permanent than Whispers of Nature, for similar reasons.

I still plan on doing a drabble game the last week of August before I move to campus. Not sure of the specifics yet, but it’ll probably be like my previous drabble games - I’ll just throw Ateez into the mix of groups as well.

There were about six fics left in the queue before I emptied it (excluding Light the Pyres). I’ll post those when I like, but I think No Air and Stardust will probably be first. Maybe this weekend or in a few days, I’m not sure.

In general, I likely will not be writing nearly as much as I have in the first half of this year. The past year has been unique because of the pandemic - I had so much time to write and at the same time so much mental stress because of remote school/work that I threw myself into writing as an escape and pushed out so much work in such a short amount of time. Given my schedule and all of the stuff I have to catch up on come the new school year (applying for internships, volunteer work, in-person school, etc.), there is no way I’ll be able to write as much as I did previously.

This used to be a source of stress for me. I worried what to do if the queue just emptied and I had nothing left to post. However, during these past few weeks, I’ve written far less than I used to, and it feels surprisingly freeing in a very good way. So I’ve decided that I will not force myself to write. I will continue writing, of course, but I’m not going to sit myself down and make myself try to finish my wips the way I have for almost every day of the first half of the year.

That being said, it will likely take me longer to put out works. Longer wips like Paradise or Where the Sea Sleeps are definitely going to take more time for me to finish, which means no guarantees on posting (thought I will do my best to finish them before their respective collab deadlines!). I think I may start writing more short works like my midnight blurbs or the Sword and Shield series - they’ve been fun so far, and it’ll be a nice way for me to keep writing even if I don’t have as much time to world build or put together plots. But I won’t hold myself to that. I’ll be writing as much as I have the time and energy and motivation for, and if that’s less than I’ve been writing previously, so be it.

With that being said, I guess this semi-hiatus will technically be continuing after I finish posting the stuff that’s already completed in my drafts?? Just by virtue of me not being able to write as regularly. But that doesn’t mean I won't be active here - I’m back on Tumblr and will continue using it to cry over kpop boys and give you guys dumb life updates, so there’s that :)

Lastly, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who supported me on my brief hiatus! My writing crash hit right about the same time I wasn’t feeling entirely mentally stable (just general stress) so I was going kind of downhill for the first week of my hiatus, but all of your well-wishes made me feel a lot better. I really appreciate all of you <3 thank you thank you thank you!

(Also, side note - I’m not fucking with the Tumblr plus or post plus whatever it is. One I’m not trying to get sued for creating content like I’m a broke college student there’s no way I can afford lawyer fees and two I do this for my own enjoyment and monetizing it would just take the fun away)

now if you’ll excuse me I’ve got to go and post all the reblogs n shit I left in my drafts over the past few weeks wow I have a LOT of my mutuals’ work to catch up on

#lina talks #nas #writing updates #going to answer my asks in a bit

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heademptynothoughts · 3 years

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Blog Tag

thank you @cantputitintowords for the tag! 💕

1. Why did you choose your url?

idk it’s a pretty popular phrase and just very accurate for me lol

2. Any side blogs?

yeah i’ve got a poetry sideblog: @sometimesiwritepoems

3. How long have you been on Tumblr?

not that long, i made my account in december 2020

4. Do you have a queue tag?

nope

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

i got really obsessed with jatp and wanted to interact with the fandom

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

i really liked this particular picrew of me, thought it was cute

7. Why did you choose your header?

i’m aroace

8. What's your post with the most notes?

willex reunion, 672 notes (for some reason it’s not showing up in my top posts tho)

9. How many mutuals do you have?

idk…

10. How many followers do you have?

102

11. How many people do you follow?

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

13. How often do you use Tumblr each day?

way too often

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog?

no comment

15. How do you feel about "You need to reblog this" posts?

they make me kinda anxious so i ignore them for the most part

16. Do you like tag games?

love them! i always get happy when i see someone’s tagged me in something :)

17. Do you like ask games?

yes! i rb them a lot 😅

18. Which of your friends/ mutuals do you think is famous?

@thedeathdeelers for sure (don’t even try fighting me on this imène <3)

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

no, but i do have a lot of squishes

tagging: @sunset-sweeerve @ghostlyaceline @unremarkablegirl @evilittlecrow (no pressure ofc)

#tag game

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mulderscully · 3 years

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✨ Blog Tag Game ✨ thanks for the tag bb, @chloexdecker💖

1. Why did you choose your url? i am that very witch. no, but seriously i have watched lucifer since day one and i love it sm and wanted as close to a canon url as i could get so here we are.

2. Any side blogs? yes lol. i own @deckerstardaily and @jafaelgifs. i am an admin on @lucifergifs, my poetry and other stuff blog @adalimon. also a member of @tgpgifs. i have a couple more that aren’t too active lol i’m trying to stop making sideblogs unless i really feel like it’s necessary for the content

3. How long have you been on tumblr? since 2011 :\

4. Do you have a queue tag? yes. #q lmfao

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place? i made it for some delena event when i was in the tvd fandom

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp? i’ve got these horror marrieds on my mind

7. Why did you choose your header? bc i love deckerstar and the color matches my new icon but rn as i type the gif won’t move and idk why

8. What’s your post with the most notes? prob something doctor who related from the dawn of time lol i remember i had one gifset w/ like 120k notes

9. How many mutuals do you have? i have never counted that?

10. How many followers do you have? 20.1k

11. How many people do you follow? 548

12. Have you ever made a shitpost? of course!! that’s our language on here.

13. How often do you use tumblr everyday? everyday, almost all day lol i’m unemployed

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? yes i haveeeeee

15. How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts? i hate them bc i don’t come on here to be guilt tripped and lots of times misinfo spread w/ those posts ngl

16. Do you like tag games? sure, i just feel bad if i miss them!!

17. Do you like ask games? i do but they make me anxious for some reason

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? tumblr famous is a myth. i have some super talented mutuals who run some v important source blogs but i don’t think there is fame on this site lmfao

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual? nope!

tagging, @yoursummerfrost, @tarysande, @rupert-giles, @lucymorans, @maxfenig, @lightbrng, @variantslokis, @softiescully, @verafarmiga, @inejsghafaa, @blairwitchz, @samcaarter, and anyone who wants to! feel free to ignore for whatever reason :)

#ask games

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eaion · 3 years

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tagged by @tennant, thank you! :)

Why did you choose your URL?

I wanted something that was short and contained a lot of vowels (because I just like them) and doesn’t mean anything (then later I learned that it is actually a name, but, okay, whatever. :D)

Any side blogs?

I had two for my messy photos, and another one what is just a try-blog, but contains nothing and back then in the early days, I did a sideblog that was multifandom, but then now this - the main - is my only blog that I use, I’m tired lazy to separate things...

How long have you been on tumblr?

Since the spring of 2012

Do you have a queue tag?

I don’t use queue nowadays, but when I used it, I just tagged as “queue” (I’m boring :D)

Why did you start your blog in the first place?

I came for the fanarts, stayed for the gifs, I guess. Back then I was very, very into Tron Legacy and one of my friends showed me that basically here is the Tron fandom and here are the cool fanarts, so that’s the main reason I joined here. :) Back then people talked more to each other and it was more of a family-like thing - at least for me. I can’t really draw, but I was fascinated by the gifs here (in 2012 tumblr only allowed like 1MB size only :)), so I learned how to do it (it wasn’t easy, I just found tutorials after that I found out myself how to make them :’D), and still amazed by other peeps’ awesome works! ^^

Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

It’s Captain Cold and I’m cool with him, don’t really want to change him. :)

Why did you choose your header?

The absolutely gorgeous fanmade movie: Detroit Evolution’s cast are just amazing and funny. :)

What’s your post with the most notes?

It’s the Wentworth Miller talking about how to deal with depression set (I’m very glad that this has the most notes. <3)

How many mutuals do you have?

I don’t know exacty. :) I don’t easily follow someone, but when I (finally) start following, I mostly never unfollow them.

How many follows do you have?

Ca. 1500? I try to block the pornbots, but I’m not sure I’m always succeeded in it. :D

How many people do you follow?

About 300-400

Have you ever made a shitpost?

I guess I made some. :D

How often do you use tumblr each day?

Sometimes too much - I’m so sorry, if I love something, I tend to spam it... :’)

Did you have a fight with another blog once?

Not exactly a fight, I just have some people who broke my heart...

How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

They make me a bit anxious...

Do you like tag games?

I love them, though I’m not very good at them, I guess, sometimes I don’t know what to answer and feel myself a bit dumb, so I pass the game. (But I always appreciate the tagging! <333)

Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

What does it mean exactly being tumblr famous? :)

Do you have a crush on a mutual?

I think I do.

Tagging: Yay, I could a lot of friends! @slimysuckers @mymycorrhizae , @ilivejustinmyownworld , @nixie-deangel , @queerghostie , @yamimana-ramblings, @igybeszelunke , @juniperluann, and of course everyone who’d like to do this! (no pressure, of course)

#tagging game #long post #maybe?

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moonsbeta · 3 years

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Thank you for tagging me @dandyvespa 💖! I loved all these questions!! And I also enjoyed reading what you said!

1. Why did you choose your url?

I chose this url cause I’m a huge moon enthusiast, I’ve always gravitated towards the moon ever since I was a child (it’s always calmed and grounded me). And beta well, for multiple reasons! When it comes to writing I like to beta, and drawing I find beta work to be amazing. And lastly with abo dynamics I would totally be a beta lol! So all around I’m a beta when it comes to doing things. So hence moonsbeta!

2. Any side blogs? If you have them name them and why you have them.

Nope! This is my only blog, and has been for awhile! Although this is not my first blog, I previously had two others (I think lol)

3. How long have you been on tumblr?

Since 2015 but on this blog since 2017, I believe!

4. Do you have a queue tag?

I do not!

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

I wanted to start fresh! I wanted to create a blog where I could post about ALL my likings and not just one specific thing! To be able to post about multiple things but be organized and make it look nice hahaha!

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

I’m just in love with this picture of Jungkook! It’s probably one of my favorite pictures of him ever! I love how he looks, with his pretty face and features! His pout and pretty hair and eyes!

7. Why did you choose your header?

I chose it cause I definitely wanted something animated/a gif, probably from an anime. I also wanted it to be pink to go with my pink theme. And so waves seemed fitting and I found this one that just fits perfectly! I love how it looks like the waves lap into the actual background because the colors are so similar!

8. What’s your post with the most notes?

It’s this post I screen-recorded of Jin’s birthday live! It was my favorite part of the live and I found it so funny! So I’m happy it’s this one! I remember sitting and thinking what I should caption it lol I was so shocked to see that many notes!

https://moonsbeta.tumblr.com/post/189454488206/as-soon-as-jin-left-it-became-a-jungjihope

9. How many mutals do you have?

Around 3-4! 💕

I’m always down to have more but I’m terrible at communication/responding 😔

10. How many followers do you have?

282! <333

11. How many people do you follow?

492!! Damn I didn’t even know I followed that many, but all of them are 👌🏻

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

Umm,,, I’m not sure! Maybe?

13. How often do you use tumblr each day?

I hadn’t been using it as frequently but recently I’ve been on here a bit more! Maybe once to three times a day!

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? Who won?

I haven’t! Not that I remember, even online I’m scared of confrontation LOL! I know that I have a private post that I made which is reallly long responding to someone that said some unnecessary stuff I disagreed with but I didn’t have the guts to post it publicly!

15. How do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

I don’t like it when posts have that or are being too aggressive with a “you’re ‘this’ if you don’t reblog” cause I don’t want guilt-tripping to be the reason for a reblog.

also it makes my ocd act up and I become anxious if I don’t do it or don’t want to reblog cause I feel like something bad might happen and I don’t want anyone else to feel bad because calling people things will only diminish the real meaning behind those words and actual victims of those kinds of people, and make innocent people feel bad about themselves in the end.

16. So you like tag games?

I do! It makes me feel good when I get tagged, I love it! And I really enjoy reading what my mutual said and then responding with my own things!

17. Do you like ask games?

I do! But I’ve never done it personally although I would like to!

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

I feel like all of them lowkey have a pretty decent following lol!

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

I don’t! I haven’t had a crush in yearss tho!

20. Tags?

Tag you’re it~ : @evannotoven @winwxn @jiminieloved @iuconic @soonhoonsol and anyone else who wants to do it (you can @ me too!!) I’m also adding @princebeomgyu <3

#this one was fun #I like these like short answer tags hahaha #you get to learn about the person and hopefully you learned something about me too #tag game #tag #me #moon🌙secrets

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sombreboy · 4 years

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Mused obsession (2)

Written by @sombreboy as Jungkook & @chimoona as Jimin Banner by @carly-bean-blog

[ masterlist ]

⇢Explicit (18+) ⇢Pairing: Jungkook & Jimin ⇢Genre: yandere, smut, mxm ⇢Word count: 5.4k ⇢Ch.warnings: Alcohol consumption, profanity, jealous jk, so much sexual tension, bending the overwatch rules for the sake of the story don’t come at me lmao, also this is the last chapter without any filth so buckle up honey

Industry famous Jeon Jungkook of GJK photography takes an interest in a model and up-and-coming fashion designer, Park Jimin. After an opportunity to study the man behind his trusty lens, he thinks he may have just found his new muse.

Jimin’s mind kept wandering to the young artist even when he was bustling backstage. He delegates tasks to a couple crew members and walks over to a standing mirror to check his appearance. He’s ethereal, dressed in a soft white shirt, wrapping high around his neck and tied with a loose bow. On top of that is a fitted jacket with large black lapels, covered entirely in dark gold accents. He wanted to be seen, and this would definitely do the trick. His guests haven’t even arrived and he’s already getting looks from the backstage crew and hired models. He adjusts his tight pants to hug comfortably, drawing just the right amount of attention to his toned legs and small waist.

“Park, it’s time.” His stage manager approaches with a waitlist in-hand. “Follow me to the entryway. It’s time to greet our guests.”

Guests trail in one by one, or in groups, filling up the venue. However, Jungkook is still on his way, in no rush. He hates to be in the middle of a cramped crowd. Although he knows he would most likely be allowed to pass through the line, he prefers to simply arrive a little later than everybody else. It gives him a grand entrance, in some type of way — always drawing the eyes of people, shocked that he actually would show up. He knows the game.

“We’ve arrived, Jeon.” The chauffeur announces as they park in front of the building. Jungkook’s slick black car is turning the heads of those curious to see who would show up late. With his type of car, surely it’s somebody of importance. Jungkook wonders if Jimin is anxious to see him, or maybe even a tad bit worried about whether he would show up or not.

Inside, Jimin floats from person to person as they arrive, thanking them for coming and receiving compliments in return. He was right about his choice in clothing as he began to attract a lot of attention, especially from his agency mate Taehyung.

Tae is best known for his work in accessory modelling, using his smooth hands, tapered wrists and long neck to his advantage. His physical assets are a prized commodity when displaying very luxe pieces of jewellery. His ads often display on Cartier and Rolex storefronts, in case you didn’t know. Like he’d ever let you forget. Being managed by the same company often meant Tae got the chance to work alongside Jimin, always taking the opportunity to shamelessly flirt.

“You should have asked me to model for you, Jimin.” He places his hand on the small of Jimin’s back and toys with the sequins there. He leans close to Jimin’s ear and breathes gently, tickling his cuff—“You know I’d do it in a heartbeat.”

Jimin clears his throat, trying to maintain his composure. “I’ll keep that in mind, Tae. Thank you for offering.” Taehyung cracks a sly smile and begins to walk away, turning to look over his shoulder, making sure Jimin watches. “Congratulations on the collection, by the way. Can’t wait to see how Jeon pulled off the promo shots.”

Jimin smiles back and nods as Tae leaves to greet their manager, then releases a sigh and looks around the room for Jungkook, wondering if he’d ever show up.

Jungkook steps out of the car as his chauffeur holds the door open, then heads towards the venue’s front door and is immediately allowed to pass by the small queue waiting to enter. Perks of being a celebrity, supposedly. As expected, he’s greeted with smiles, almost flocked by other celebrities trying to make a connection — mostly for business, others for personal reasons. He doesn’t smile, however. He simply excuses himself as he moves further, eyes searching for the one blonde he came for in the first place. Unsuccessful in his mission, he opts for alcohol, heading towards the bar area to lean against the counter. He orders a large pint of beer, never truly understanding those able to drink whiskey. As he chugs down a few gulps, his eyes finally spot the man he was looking for. Only question is... who’s that whispering in his ear?

Jungkook’s eyes spark in recognition when the mystery man pulls away to leave. Ah, Kim Taehyung. Another model that has been up his ass for quite a while to have his photo taken. Well, he just blew his chance on that one... The younger remains at his spot, halfway done with his drink and eyes fixated on the blonde. He’s fascinated by his effortless beauty, simply socializing with others. He quickly remembers he brought a small camera, just as high quality as his larger ones, but much more subtle for places like this. He places the beer back on the counter before aiming his camera at Jimin, snapping a few secret shots.

Absolutely angelic.

Jimin taps his foot to the music, leaning against the bar at the back of the room while he waits for his cocktail to arrive. He has no shame in ordering a cosmopolitan, loving the blushed pink color and sweet taste. He was craving something sweet after his photo shoot yesterday—banana milk still ripe on his tongue. He finds himself wondering if he should order something for Jungkook, pleading to make the impression of a courteous host, but decides he’d rather wait to see the man first. Drink in hand, he sways his hips to the music, combing through the crowd, shaking hands and kissing other fellow agency members on the cheek as he brushes past them. Now on his second cosmo, he’s feeling loose and a little impatient. His lips curl delicately around the rim of the glass to sip down the last of the pink liquid. He thumbs a stray droplet from his bottom lip and decides it’s time to head backstage and check in.

Jungkook keeps his eyes fixed on the elder the entire time, enjoying the opportunity to observe how Jimin acts when he isn’t aware of the younger's eyes. A cosmopolitan, huh? Jimin would order such a drink. Kook wants to taste for himself — having never tried one before. He normally goes for beer, which he finishes off and sets down on the counter with a clonk. He’s still watching Jimin, the social butterfly that he is. A beautiful, gorgeous butterfly...the way his plush lips curl around the rim of the glass — mesmerizing. What’s even more devastating is the subtle swipe of his thumb across his lower lip.

“Park Jimin, you are dangerous...” Jungkook mutters to himself as his cautious eyes follow the man. He glances down at his watch, knowing it was almost showtime. He decides to announce his presence beforehand, sauntering over, keeping his gaze on Jimin until he’s next to him. He gives his arm a light nudge with his own.

“Hey.”

It takes Jimin a couple seconds to register that the nudge was coming from Jungkook, then stops dead in his tracks by the man’s dark suit and styled hair. He can smell a woodsy musk coming from him, enchanting his senses. Jimin is so impressed by how well Jungkook has cleaned up that he can barely take his eyes off him.

“Hey, you,” Jimin smiles and wraps him in a friendly hug—perhaps a little too friendly given his liquid courage. “You look great,” he gushes and gives the man a light kiss on the cheek like he did with his friends — just a little longer than the rest. “Decided to finally show up, huh? Fashionably late—I get it.” The model teases, enjoying how wide Jungkook’s eyes get when he doesn’t treat him like a big-shot. “Let’s get you settled in, Jeon.” Jimin loops his arm into the younger’s and leads him to the bar to buy a new round of cosmos. “The show is about to begin. I saved you a seat at the front.”

Jungkook is no stranger to friendly kisses on the cheek from acquaintances, but this was the first time when coming from another man — that it made a shiver run down his spine. Jimin’s lips are soft, plushy, and feel like a kiss from an angel itself. It is, unfortunately, addicting . A part of him can’t help but wonder how they’d feel on his own lips... Jungkook shrugs off his continuous thoughts; there are more important things to think about than kissing the man holding him close... right? He lets the smaller man guide him towards the bar, eyes immediately falling on the sweet drink and licking his lips at the sight. It looks delicious, so he decides to get one as well, then picks it up and tilts his head back, tasting it with a larger gulp than one normally would . T he sweetness coats his tongue and leaves a small layer of liquid on his lower lip.

“I’m technically not late...the show hasn't started yet.” He smiles, the mix of beer and cosmo slowly hitting his system. Kook glances up at Jimin. “Shall we go, then?”

Arm in arm, Jimin guides Jungkook towards the runway. He holds him close to navigate through the dense crowd. Heads turn as the two of them enter the room, some trying their best to network with the photographer as he passes by. “You’re getting more attention than me,” Jimin comments over the sound of bustling gossip. “If I was smart I would have offered to dress you in a suit from my collection. You’d fit right in with the models.”

“That would have been a smart choice,” Jungkook jokes, eyes continuously falling back to where Jimin holds his bicep close, and where their bodies pressed together. He barely notices the passing words of others and they completely go over his head. His focus is solely on Jimin’s sweet tone, trying to keep his eyes up to look around. He isn’t usually comfortable in crowded areas, so he’s grateful to the model for keeping him grounded. “Maybe I would’ve accepted.”

“Then it’s settled,” Jimin says with a squeeze to his arm, noting how the tall handsome man melts into his touch. “And it’s not going to be just any suit, obviously. It has to be custom .” He leads Jungkook close to the stage and takes a seat next to him, keeping his body close for comfort in the hectic bustle of celebrities. “Think of it as a tip for your hard work these past few days,” he adds.

...Or an excuse to run his hands over more of the photographer’s toned body as he takes measurements. Either way, it would give him another opportunity to have the man alone.

“I wouldn’t expect anything but custom,” Jungkook scrunches his nose as he smiles, joking on his own expense. “That, or I wouldn’t be Jeon Jungkook.” He slumps down on the chair as Jimin follows to take a seat next to him. Their sides are still pressed together tightly — not that the younger has anything against it. Rather the opposite. He enjoys the close proximity. His gaze continously steals glances at the elders flawless profile. He knew he was admiring the man already, but up close...it’s next level. Jungkook’s eyes travel down the soft slope of Jimin’s nose until they land on the plush, tinted lips that are blessed with a natural pout. ...it should be illegal.

Jimin may not have noticed Jungkook’s covert photos earlier, but he’s not blind to the man’s roaming stare as it fixates on every facet of his face. Jimin sneaks a few glances for himself, or rather, unabashedly eye-fucks him. Everything about the guy is alluring—the long dark hair, the sharp jawline and slightly exposed chest under his low-cut black shirt. Jimin almost salivates at the thought of claiming his mouth in front of all these strangers. It must be the third cosmo in his system. He’s feeling loose and uninhibited, even more now that he knows his interests aren’t misplaced. If Jungkook keeps staring, Jimin might have to fast-track that personal fitting.

The lights dim to indicate that the show was about to begin.

“Excuse me,” Jimin leans close to whisper, purposefully pressing his glossy pout against Jungkook’s ear, anxious to see how it affects him, “I’ve got a speech to give.” He then stands and gracefully floats to stage to find his footing in front of the microphone.

Jungkook forces himself to tightly swallow down the groan threatening to escape his lips when he feels Jimin’s breath fan over his ear. The scent of alcohol mixed with the elders sweet perfume is intoxicating. One turn of his head and his lips could’ve been on Jimin’s. The thought was awfully tempting, but before he was able to react in any way, the blonde withdrew himself to stride towards the stage. Jimin’s ring-clad fingers delicately wrap around the microphone stand, and the younger straightens his posture — gaze still fixed on the gorgeous angel before him. He reaches down his pocket, fingers gripping around his camera. He really wants to capture the moment.

“I thank each and every one of you for attending, what I hope to be, the very beginning of a successful launch.”

Cameras flash from the crowd—a few media sources, fashion bloggers and excited industry mates document the moment. Jimin gulps down a small wave of nerves and continues on. He’s a professional. He can do this.

“My team and I are excited to share a first look at the ‘Be Your Light’ collection, created to evoke confidence and empower those who wear it to show their true selves.” He clasps his hands together in thanks and gives a small bow to the crowd. “Enjoy the show and please look forward to more in the coming weeks...” He looks over to Jungkook, as if speaking directly to the man as he delivers his finishing statement — “...there’s much more yet to come.”

Jungkook doesn’t hesitate to lift his own camera along with everybody else, snapping a few closeup shots of this big moment. It’s huge, and Kook can’t help but smile with pride. He’s gonna go so far, especially with his assistance. As soon as their eyes meet, Jungkook lowers his camera to truly see Jimin as he finishes on stage. His heart flutters — excitement evident as he flashes the gorgeous angel a toothy grin followed with a nod of approval. There surely is much more to come. And, hopefully, more projects together.

Jimin can’t wipe the smile from his face. The applause of the room carries on as he walks back to his seat. But barely there, he’s tugged to the side by a familiar pair of smooth hands.

“Loved the speech,” Taehyung slurs, urging the model to sit beside him instead. The scent of dark rum is heavy on his breath. He was never very good at staying composed during events like this. Deep bass thunders from the rafters as the first model hits the runway.

“Thanks Tae, but I’ve got to—“ Jimin is silenced by the man as he grips his face and tries to kiss him roughly, missing by an inch.

“You’re such a TEASE tonight,” Tae snarls. “Come home with me.”

His proposition is blunt as per usual. Jimin politely shakes his head and smiles as if nothing happened, trying to reduce the amount of attention they’re already drawing. To his relief, their manager intervenes and coaxes Tae to sit back in his seat, allowing Jimin enough time to slip back to his rightful spot beside Jungkook.

Jungkook saw everything. Watching Taehyung attempt to kiss Jimin was probably one of the most frustrating feelings he had ever felt. That’s when he knew he didn’t want anybody else to have a chance with the blonde. It also meant...Jungkook really has an interest in the man. It’s obvious, but he wouldn’t acknowledge it — not until he saw Jimin almost kiss somebody who wasn’t him. The very moment Jimin sat down next to him, his tongue continuously prodded the inside of his cheek in annoyance. One arm quickly wraps around the elders shoulders, pulling him closer to talk to through the loud music. “What the hell was that?”

“Nothing,” Jimin mumbles, crossing his legs. He and Tae have unfinished business but his fashion show is far from the appropriate venue to address it. In the past, Tae’s everlasting propositions would often bring him to his knees and he knew it well. Behind the curtain of a runway, to the filthy floor of a club bathroom. But that was the past. Jungkook probably doesn’t need to know that part, not when he’s already so annoyed. “He just had too much to drink,” Jimin clarifies, “it’s fine.”

Jungkook doesn’t even attempt to hide the way he scrunches his nose in annoyance. Maybe it’s due to the alcohol, but he presses Jimin closer to himself and fans his breath over the elders ear as he speaks. “You’re not required to stay any longer, right? You did your speech...”

Jimin leans his small body tight to Jungkook, needing to be closer as well, blood warming to his dominant aura. He still feels the white hot stares of neighbouring attendees after the little stunt Taehyung pulled. His stage manager is more than capable of handling the rest of the show, he’s sure of that. If he wants the attention back on the garments and the rest of the show to be a success, it’s best he slips out.

He keeps his voice low enough for only Jungkook to hear — “Get me out of here.”

The words roll off Jimin’s lips, and they’re more than enough for Jungkook to spring into action. A smirk curls on his lips as he stands up, grabbing the elders hand shamelessly.

“Let’s go, then.”

He tugs the blonde along, scuffing through the crowd. On the way out, his eyes meet Taehyung’s sharp gaze as it flickers between the two men hand in hand. Jungkook flashes him a shit eating grin, knowing Tae would simply have nothing to argue about, especially if he ever wants a slight chance to work with the photographer in the future.

He could forget about it, Kook muses to himself.

He leads Jimin to his car, already on cue to leave at Jungkook's say so. He holds the back door open for his company, letting him get seated before joining inside.

Jimin settles in close as the driver begins to take them away. He’s not sure where they’re going and doesn’t care to ask, content as long as it’s far from prying eyes. He slips his hand under Jungkook’s as he misses the feeling of skin on skin, then looks up at the younger with a small smile on his pouty lips. “Thank you,” he says, mentally musing over the many ways he’d like to show him his gratitude. The way Jungkook took command of that situation wrecks Jimin, to say the least. He can’t blink away the image of Jungkook’s jaw tightening, nose scrunching, or how hot his breath felt like fire against his neck as he asked about Taehyung.

Jungkook shrugs lightly, a small smile on his lips at the simple words of gratitude. It’s cute, the way Jimin suddenly seems to shrink beside him when they’re alone. Apparently an audience makes him cocky, but the one-on-one moments together make him look almost... innocent . The duality is exactly why Jungkook feels such a strong pull towards him. The car slowly pulls through a large gated area, turning into a driveway next to a grand mansion. Kook doesn’t wait for the chauffeur to open the door and simply does so himself without a word, waiting for the elder to follow. He hasn’t bothered asking Jimin if he wants to go with him to his home. Then again, Jungkook often does whatever he pleases.

Jimin follows him obediently, noting that perhaps chivalry isn’t dead. He hasn’t had a man open a door for him unless he was paid or obligated to do so. He nods in thanks and marvels at the house he’s about to step into. Just from the outside, it’s beautiful and meticulously landscaped.

“Is this all yours?” Jimin asks, mouth slightly parted in awe. He’s considered himself to be well off for his age, but the younger man takes it to the next level.

Jungkook cranes his neck to observe his house, giving a light nod before he strolls towards the grand front door, fumbling in his pockets to fish out the keys. “All mine.” His lips twitch in a smile, glancing over the shoulder at the blonde. Kook remembers buying his house — the excitement back then was comparable to that of a child on christmas. However, with time, material things grew worthless. In a sense, he’s used to it all, but seeing Jimin’s admiration sparks a pride — an appreciation for his own wealth, perhaps. “Wanna come inside?” he asks cheekily, as if that wasn’t already the plan.

Jimin nods again and follows him in. It isn’t normal by any stretch to have as much self-built notoriety and materialistic gain before the age of 30... or any age, really. It makes him even more curious to know the young photographer. It’s not the fame or fortune that draws him in; it’s the reminder that Jeon Jungkook, GJK-branded icon, photographer to the stars, is also the milk-sipping boy with manners and a childlike glimmer in his eye. What a conundrum, Jimin thinks. His eyes flick to Jungkook’s ass as he walks through the grand doors, noting for the first time just how toned it is. A very...alluring conundrum.

Tonight may be the night he discovers even more about the semi-mysterious younger man. He’s almost jittery with anticipation, wondering what he has in store for their evening together.

The doors automatically close behind them — the loud click of the lock echoes in the hallway as Jungkook slowly saunters towards the open space of the living room, gesturing towards the couch to offer Jimin a seat. Kook paces through the room to reach the open kitchen, stepping behind the only thing separating the two rooms — a large marbled counter, which frames the space deemed a kitchen. He opens the fridge and scans his various beverages with a hum.

Yes, he has a fridge solemnly dedicated to drinks...

“Want something to drink? I have alcohol, soda, energy drinks...even bananamilk. You liked that, right?” Kook’s oddball mind almost craves to mix alcohol with his favorite sweet drink. It could be the best of both worlds, as a kids show once told him.

Already three cosmos into the night, Jimin decides to stray from the sweet side of the flavor spectrum, at least until he’s a little more drunk.

“I did like the banana milk...” he’s almost tempted to take him up on the offer just knowing how pleased Jungkook would be by the decision, but no, he needs something that will make him a little more... uninhibited . He taps his fingers against his chin in thought, taking a seat on the big couch. “I’ll take a glass of wine. Red, if you have it.”

Jungkook hums as he crouches to the bottom of the fridge. His stack of unopened wine bottles is finally coming to use as he doesn’t normally drink wine too often himself. He supposes he can indulge in some as well. “Does the brand matter?” Kook asks, but not really waiting for an answer before he picks one that he remembers getting as a gift from... well , he doesn’t remember. All he knows is it’s of decent quality. Pricey, to say the least. The bottles clonk together as he grabs the one he thinks fits Jimin best, forgetting about his craving for the milk as he returns to the couch with the large bottle and two glasses in hand. “If you want anything specific I can always have it delivered.” He murmurs as he places the glasses down and pulls up his sleeves to open the bottle with a pop. Pop is also an accurate description of what the veins in his hands did as he works the cork out of the bottle neck.

Jimin cannot help the gravitational pull he has towards hands, especially those that do hard work and reflect the fruits of their labor. When Jungkook raises his sleeves, it’s the first time Jimin gets a look at the tattoos that wrap around one arm and down his long fingers. He watches as Jungkook uncorks the bottle and swipes his tongue across his lips to wet them. “Thanks for the offer,” he says quietly, too engrossed in the task at hand. “I’m sure we have everything we need right here.”

Jungkook’s eyebrows tightly draw together as he focuses on pouring the drink into each glass, having no care for the etiquette of ‘filling halfway.’ No, Jungkook fills the glasses until the transparent material is completely red, seeing no reason in being stingy with the drink. When satisfied, he places the bottle on the table and sits down to hand Jimin his overfilled glass while treating himself to the same. He wastes no time in taking a large gulp as he’s not the kind to ‘savor the taste.’

Jimin watched the process and throughout and thought how cute it was that he didn't know how to pour wine. It was just another moment Jimin savoured as unexpected yet endearing. He follows Jungkook’s lead and greedily gulps down a mouthful of the dry merlot. He can tell it’s expensive because it drinks like water and bursts with fruity flavour. He takes another gulp and already feels his alcohol levels rise.

“What do you do around here for fun?” Jimin asks, looking around the room.

Jungkook’s eyes twinkle with excitement at the question, quickly pointing towards the large TV hanging on the wall. “I like video games…” He takes another gulp of his wine, already having downed most of it. He feels the alcohol loosening him up a bit with cheeks a hue of red, puffing up with a smile. “Do you play?”

Jimin swivels to look at the TV and surveys the gaming setup. There’s no doubt the photographer likes to indulge his interests given he owns every console imaginable. He stands with his wine, drinking it steadily as he walks over to the selection of games.

“I’ve played Overwatch before,” he notes, plucking the game and walking it back to Jungkook. “But I won’t go easy on you, Jeon.” He smirks, holding eye contact. He wraps his full lips around the rim of the glass to polish off the rest of his wine, even braver than he was a second ago. “In fact, let’s make this interesting.” His confidence is back in full swing. “Weaker player has to do whatever the other wants, no questions asked.”

Jungkook’s fingers curl around the gamecase — the small pull on his lips quickly turn into a playful smirk at the elders' words. “You won’t go easy on me ?” His smirk morphs, surprised by Jimin’s challenge. He quickly closes his mouth, processing his words as the alcohol amplifies his curiosity about all the possible outcomes of when he wins. Because, obviously, there’s no way Jimin could beat him in overwatch. “Oh... really? ” Jungkook purrs as he stands up, stepping closer to the blonde until their chests merely graze together. His warm breath fans Jimin’s face as he waves the game in the air. “Deal...no questions asked.”

Jungkook quirks an eyebrow and wastes no time in turning the game on, then returns to the couch with two controllers and hands one to Jimin. He’s confident, however, a part of him wonders what Jimin would come up with if he did win…

“D-deal,” Jimin repeats softly, blushing. He grips the controller to focus on something tangible. His heart thunders in his chest as Jungkook’s warm breath still lingers on his flesh. “Before we get started,” he slightly slurs and waves his empty glass in the air, feeling loose. “...Refill time?” Overwatch isn’t necessarily the model’s forte but perhaps he can get the upper hand if Jungkook is just a little more inebriated. Not that he’s trying to take advantage…or maybe he is. The opportunity to do whatever he wants with the man, no questions asked? He doesn’t even know where he would start. He almost feels lightheaded by the thought of guiding Jungkook’s tattooed hand to wrap around his throat, punishing him for being indecisive.

Jungkook’s eyes land on the empty glass in Jimin’s hand. …He wants more? One bottle down, and even the younger man can feel that he’s leaning way past tipsy. But , he thinks, what the hell . It’s a night of celebration, after all. Besides, he may not get another chance like this, alone with the gorgeous blonde. There’s no use in wasting it.

“Okay.” He stands up once more to grab another bottle, returning to fill the glasses up to the brim. There isn’t a single bone in Jungkook that can be described as stingy. He’s very generous. “Don’t blame the wine if you lose though,” he slurs out the words and slumps down on the couch. His fingers tightly grip the controller with one hand as he tilts his head back to chug more of his beverage ; throat muscles flexing as he does so.

Who is he kidding? Jimin has never played the game before. Knocking back a large gulp of his drink, he sets the glass aside to focus. It’s already starting; Jungkook eagerly bounces in his seat to kick his ass. Jimin has already accepted defeat—his drunken mind circling the various shenanigans a man like Jungkook could be interested in. He combs a hand through his styled hair and ruffles it, relaxing into the couch.

“Let’s get it,” he smiles, biting down on his lip.

Jungkook’s nose scrunches up in a snort at Jimin’s words, repeating them himself in a breathy laugh — “Let’s get it!”

After not long at all , t he younger isn’t surprised to see that Jimin has no fucking idea what he’s doing. His cocky attitude was simply for show. Kook barely has to try, half-focused on glancing over at the blonde’s reactions and attempts to figure out the game. A small crease forms between Jimin’s eyebrows, so endearing. The pout on his rosey lips is... alluring . With the bet in mind, Jungkook’s mind wanders…

As the game continues on, it becomes very apparent that the blonde is going to lose his own bet. He keeps running into walls and firing at trees. With a frustrated sigh, he releases the controller and lets it flop pathetically in his lap. “The tree moved, I swear!” To think, he did it to himself. What a fool —he should have chosen something more his speed like Katamari Damacy. He scrambles to pick the controller back up, steadfast in upholding his air of perfection, but it’s too late. …it's time for his punishment.

Jungkook’s toothy smile grows, moreso at the reactions he draws out of the man next to him rather than the actual victory of the game.

“What a dumb tree, huh?” He snickers, putting the controller on the table before turning his whole body towards Jimin, swirling the wine glass in hand. Jungkook rests one arm behind Jimin and leans in real close. “Now, who lost the bet?” He clearly knows, but he really craves hearing it. Call it an ego boost, but hearing the blonde accept his loss in a flustered manner is an incredibly amusing sight.

Swallowing his pride, perhaps a little too easily, Jimin concedes with a light pink blush adorning his cheeks.

“You won, Jeon.” He finishes off the rest of his wine glass and enjoys the floaty euphoric feeling of being out of control but still very present. “Fair and square,” he breathes, inching forward, resting his hands in his lap obediently. “You hold all the power. What would you like me to do?”

‘You hold all the power.’ The words made a shiver run down Jungkook’s spine. It could be innocent, but with the tension between them, that was highly unlikely.

Jungkook’s mind wanders further as his senses amplify and unhinge by the amount of alcohol running through his system. He places his wine glass on the table, now daring to settle his free hand on Jimin’s thigh to give it a soft squeeze. His eyes never waver from the blonde as he tries to draw more reactions from him.

“No questions asked...right?”

#fic: mused obsession #yandere jungkook #jungkook x jimin #jikook #yandere bts #bts mxm #chimoona #sombreboy #boymeetsmxm #jikook fic

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elinaline · 3 years

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I hot tagged both by @sunny-day-sky and @breadstyx so I guess I'm forced to do this game

1. why did you choose your url?

it's my name and then some, and also because I can't get back my old url @gallicisme :'(

2. any side blogs?

yeah ! there's @thisisreallyanartblog for all the art that really fucks, @aniledotpng for my original art, and @life-like-game where I used to make fun of all the reddit shower thoughts about how life is a video game but I kinda abandoned that one

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

five years ! I joined in 2016. I've been lurking since 2014 tho

4. do you have a queue tag?

yes ! I haven't used it much lately it depends on the mood I guess. It's #is it a queue or am i still awake, because i started using it last year during the lockdown, when my mental health was at -2 and my sleep schedule was terribly fucked. I'm still trying to unfuck it, too

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

I was into kpop at the time, and kpop tumblr is more bearable than kpop twitter and that says a lot lol

also I wanted to make foreign friends

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

it's art by @trowan-art !!!!!!! It's so good !!! they made a portrait of me and it's so good !!!!!!!!!!!!!

7. why did you choose your header?

pretty sunset brain goes brr

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

so I guess it would be a reblog I did of Emily chef-pyro on that one gifset of spiderverse... original post I think it's the second Caretaker dance ! either that or one of the posts I made about the french protests that got turned into riot porn :/

9. how many mutuals do you have?

A Bunch

10. how many followers do you have?

a bit under 500

11. how many people do you follow?

A Bunch² a lot actually but about 80% of the people I follow are artblogs that are active like two or three times a year. And a good portion of the rest are mutuals

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

does that not just mean a joke post. have I- have I made a joke yes I did

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

too much if we're being honest lol, but it really depends on the days also ! days where I'm feeling like absolute shit and everything makes me anxious I'll be on tumblr more because I literally cannot focus on anything anyways

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

there was that guy once who tried to harass me when I told him raccoons are wild animals and not pets but I blocked him and reported him after like two anons. I generally don't fight people on here: if they come with a fighting mentality that means everything will come out of bad faith and I don't have the energy to talk to a wall that does not listen but punches you

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

I filtered "need to reblog" so I wouldn't have to see them anymore, I'm not coming here to be guilt-tripped by strangers

16. do you like tag games?

depends ! some like this one are really fun and some are less

I also tend to forget to do them because they get buried in my notes, contrary to asks that stay in my inbox until I have the disponibility

17. do you like ask games?

fucking love them, but wish they had less "what is your favorite album/movie/book/quote/author/whatever" question that I can never answer which always stresses me out for some reason, and more specific/philosophical stuff

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

oh A Bunch again ! idk how but two writers I like a lot have decided to become my mutuals, there's an Original Tumblr Funnyguy... it's really funny because I don't have many followers, but sometimes I have posts that have a huge impact because of them. Also I know a couple of them became mutuals through me, like seeing each other's posts on my blog, and I find it hilarious. I am the cupid of friendship. I am creating a polycule of cool people and they are all falling for each other as well

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

don't you ? I mean it's always a bit complicated with me to know like... what type of feeling I am experiencing, and also acting on it, but there's definitely a couple whom, if I could and if my brain let me (I think that's the biggest obstacle), I would kiss a little maybe 👉👈

20. tags?

it's gonna be difficult to tag people who weren't already tagged uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh @whowasarchituttleanyway @hatcrufle @rayisahuman @hurlumerlu @i-is-void don't feel pressured to do it tho

#ask game #long post

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on-maars · 3 years

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Tagged by: @honestlydarkprincess thank you 🥰

Why did you choose your URL? I wanted to change but didn’t know what to pick and I was listening to mars by yungblud, that’s just it.

Any side-blogs? Nope

How long have you been on tumblr? Since 2013! But I left during a few years and only came back with the disaster that was the Supernatural finale and then i started watching 911 and next thing I knew it was a buddie blog.

Do you have a queue tag? I don’t. Either you don’t see me during three days straight or I reblog a thousand stuff in an hour, there’s no in-between.

Why did you start your blog in the first place? I think my sister was annoying me about it so I eventually gave in. I don’t think I had a particular reason or fandom that made me join in.

Why did you choose your icon/pfp? This is the drawing I received from my sister @ode-tothemoon for Christmas. Her art is amazing and you can give her a follow on Instagram if you want (@/sleepersart_)

Why did you choose your header? Because Castiel is an angel and he lives among the stars 🥰

What's your post with the most notes? Just me ranting about the SPN Finale

How many people do you follow? 153

Have you ever made a shitpost? I have no idea what that is.

How often do you use tumblr? Everyday.

Did you have a fight/argument with a blog once? Who won? No. I literally hate conflict and I will run away from it every chance I get.

How do you feel about 'you need to reblog this post'? Makes me anxious and uncomfortable.

Do you like tag games? I love them very much.

Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? I don’t feel like there’s much weird unhealthy competition in here as you can see on Twitter and the fact that you can’t see how many followers your mutuals have is probably one of the things I like the most about Tumblr. So idk and idc, I just love everything I see on my dashboard :)

Do you have a crush on a mutual? I met some wonderful people in here and one day @cyllaeth and I started screaming about buddie and we never stopped. I guess t’was definitely a platonic crush cause we’re kinda talking every single day 🥰

Tagging some people I absolutely love to see on my dash: @emeraldcas @cyllaeth @ace-diaz @a-beautiful-struggle-of-life @loveyourownsmiilee @christopherismybuddie 🥰 if you see it and wanna do it, consider yourself tagged.

#tag games

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fencesandfrogs · 3 years

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‘twas tagged by @strawberrah in this!

1. why did you choose your url?

making puns about matthew, math, and matter is the core of my existence. i’m in several people’s phones as it. the concept of matter-as-in-stuff is a very quiet nod to my first homestuck aspect (space, altho i consider myself blood now), back from when all my handles were things like spaceyace.

also, it’s different from all of my other handles.

2. any sideblogs?

@mallowstep for warriors content <3k

i’m considering making one for cat photos.

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

uhhh many a year. maybe like. six or seven? across several different accounts, tho, this is my third or fourth account.

4. do you have a queue tag?

yeah, #q. but almost everything goes through the queue anyway, so like.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

heck if i know.

i think my last blog was a studyblr? and i wanted to get away from that? but i still follow a lot of studyblrs so like.

6. why did you choose your icon?

i was tagged in a picrew and liked the outcome.

7. why did you choose your header?

it’s default dots and that’s all i have and that’s all i want.

my blog theme is all purple colours because i like purple. it’s not my favourite colour but it meets the aesthetic i want.

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

some more things from growing up in a neurodivergent family

9. how many mutuals do you have?

i have no idea & no idea how to count. uh. at least three. at least three, yeah. look if u want to talk to me go for it. /gen

10. how many followers do you have?

158

11. how many people are you following?

too many

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

i used to tag them, but yes. i’m not quite sure what the definition for shitpost is tho.

13. how often do you use tumblr every day?

i don’t really track, but slightly more than is reasonable.

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

yes but bringing it up made me super anxious so now i'm not doing that.

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

i hate them. they make me feel Very Guilty for not reblogging them, even though i’m trying not to inflict that guilt on someone else.

16. do you like tag games?

yes! love them. if i ever tag u in one tho and forget to say: no obligation to participate.

17. do you like ask games?

yeah, but i do them with my sideblog more. i think i’m just. my main blog is more atmosphere and vibe.

18. which of your tumblr mutuals do you think is famous?

uhhhhh i’m...not sure? a lot of you feel famous to me lmao.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

not really.

20. tags

no pressure tags! especially if you’ve already done it. also anyone who wants to.

@pissbenderr @acaciapines @kizulu

#mine #txt #2nd #July #2021 #July 2nd 2021 #tag game

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razanartuk · 3 years

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about me tag game thing

i was tagged by the wonderful @nothingunrealistic! thank you very much ily <3

under read more bc i was not capable of keeping my answers brief this time around

why did you choose your url?

this...was supposed to be a short explanation but it turned into quite a tale so strap in i guess because we are going on a ride. back in 2017 i was just getting into musical theatre rp and i was still feeling too shy to really talk to anyone ooc so i would just wait for people i wanted to interact with to post starter calls so i could just do things in character with them the easy way. So i did this with my friend cam, who posted a starter for me using a lyric from If I Could Tell Her. she linked the song so i could listen to it, so i did and i went ‘wait a minute, is that Ben Platt from Pitch Perfect?? (and other things too, but i only recognized his voice at the time bc of the acappella girl movies)’ and yes it certainly was.

i had zero idea what the plot of Dear Evan Hansen was about at that point, and for some reason based off Just That One Song and the poster art of who i assumed was Some Guy in a Polo Shirt i started to think it was about some jock guy who broke his arm and had an emo/goth friend who had either died or gone missing under mysterious circumstances. also i intuited that Evan had a crush on his friend’s sister but he couldn’t tell her that directly or his emo friend would kick his ass. so i was like mostly wrong, but a little bit right.

oh and i knew jared and alana were characters from the show bc cam said that they were i think?? but i had no idea what their role was. so after listening to if i could tell her, i listened to good for you and all i really got out of that was that evan the apparently not-jock guy had done...something... that really hurt jared and alana. and at that point i finally decided to go look up a plot synopsis and i found out i was waaay off base. but honestly this is why cast recordings should include scene dialogue in the songs bc otherwise you just get soundtracks like dear evan hansen where the songs have like. zero context. we really just go from waving through a window to for forever to sincerely me without like. any reason as to what is happening huh. It’s honestly not a surprise anymore that all those people on twitter had no idea the plot isn’t about gay teenagers.

anyways. cam was writing jared and she made a post at one point about wishing somebody would write alana and i was like ‘oh i could do that!’ (after i had actually Seen a bootleg and finally knew what the whole story was, of course) so i made a multimuse rp blog featuring alana beck, nabulungi hatimbi, chloe valentine and some other characters, and cam started sharing her headcanons with me that alana is trans, jared and alana were close friends when they were little kids but they sort of drifted apart as they got older and their priorities in life changed, jared was the first person alana came out to when she realized she’s trans, etc.

one night i started talking about wanting to pick a more theatre-relevant url for my blog and trans-[character name] urls were getting pretty popular, and at least 3 of the friends i made through rp had changed theirs to coordinating trans-[character name] and i think it was cam suggested i should make mine be trans-alana so i did. eventually i realized the unhyphenated version was available so i changed it to transalana with no hyphen and i have lived here ever since. sometimes i think about changing it but i feel like transalana has become a part of My Brand and i am not so great with coming up with cool names for things.

any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them

in theory, i have sideblogs... i don’t really use them, but of the ones i do have, there is:

emsbookblog - this was supposed to be where i would post excerpts of the book that i’m working on, but i think i did that maybe one time roughly 2 years ago and then promptly forgot about it/got nervous about my writing and was scared to share anything else. the rest of the stuff that is there is assorted writing tips. i don’t really know what to do with it now. i probably should post all my little thoughts about em and anita and caleb there instead of infodumping on my main from time to time, but if i do that then i have to promo a sideblog and direct people over to it which is always annoying to me when i could just do it on this blog which is much easier

dearnovelhansen - this is basically no longer used, but was a sideblog i made specifically to talk/complain about the novel adaptation of Dear Evan Hansen which was about 3 years ago?? maybe? i can’t be trusted to understand the passage of time. but to summarize: i thought it was an honor just to have the story be made more accessible since many of us couldn’t see the stage performance, but i hated a lot of the creative liberties that were taken. my main grumbles are that everyone who isn’t evan or connor is done so dirty in the novel. connor’s still kind of done dirty in the book, but not as much as like. heidi, alana, jared, and zoe are.

horseisle3 - this one was meant to be a place where i could just enthusiastically post screenshots from hi3, but instead it turned into a blog where i occasionally reblog other players’ hi3 content and bitch about how bad the game admins are bc hi3 is the tumblr famous (infamous?) homophobic horse game. the game where it was once okay to call your club store the gulag bc according to their head of hr, ‘it’s just a russian word for prison’ but you can’t say ‘im gay’ without somebody accusing you of corrupting young children who play the game. unfortunately there aren’t very many good interactive horse games out there, so this one is still about as good as it gets. it’s either that or star stable and i don’t care about star stable.

mlaenie - i’ve had this url saved for i don’t even know how long. way way way back in the day when i wanted to escape from the clutches of the onceler fandom i abandoned my first blog where i basically had an alter ego i guess?? and i decided to just be myself on the new blog. i don’t fully remember who came up with it, but one of my sister’s mutuals suggested that if you scrambled the letters in your name you could come up with aesthetic-looking urls. so lauren’s url became lrauen, and to match with her mine became mlaenie, which i abandoned on tumblr after about a year or so? but have continued to use as my main username on twitter, reddit, youtube, xbox, steam, and discord. i barely ever use any of these accounts aside from twitter, steam, and xbox, but yeah. so i’ve decided to try and turn this empty sideblog into a place for video game thoughts maybe. we’ll see how long it lasts this time around.

how long have you been on tumblr?

i made my first tumblr account in december of 2010, but i didn’t understand how to use it at all or how to customize my theme to look cool and unique so i quickly abandoned it. i made a new account in september of 2011 after some kids at school and my sister told me i should and i have been trapped here with varying degrees of activity/inactivity ever since. i have witnessed the rise and fall of the lorax/onceler fandom, hyperfocused on lord of the rings, star wars and back to the future all at the same time, and for the past 4 years i’ve mostly been a musical theatre blog with assorted other fandom stuff mixed in. i feel i have seen everything and nothing, but mostly i’m just tired and bored.

do you have a queue tag?

no bc i don’t use a queue. i’ve tried using it in the past but i irrationally feel pressured to sustain a coherent theme to queued posts and my brain simply does not vibe with that so i just don’t use it at all anymore. Instead i instantly reblog or post several unrelated thoughts in succession and then don’t post again at all for 3 days. the way god intended

why did you start your blog in the first place?

my very first blog was intended to be a place for me to post all of my petz 5 animals’ profile info, but i didn’t have any understanding of how coding worked at all and i don’t think i really wanted to learn, either. so it just sat there, unused. my second attempt at blogging was as a classic rock fandom person, so as you can probably imagine i was pretty pretentious about ‘modern pop’ vs the beatles, the rolling stones, the who, the monkees, and so on. and then i slowly devolved into a lorax fandom blog and everything went to shit so i made a new blog for lord of the rings/the hobbit which later evolved to include star wars and back to the future blogging. and then for the past 4 years i’ve been mainly a musical theatre blog with other random stuff i like thrown haphazardly into the pot. wonderful.

why did you choose your icon/pfp?

because my url is transalana and two of my most prominent lgbt headcanons are that alana beck is trans and a lesbian. i gotta be shouting out @kinqmike though bc she’s the one i adopted the trans alana beck headcanon from in the first place!

why did you choose your header?

in 2017 i was hyperfixating on Dear Evan Hansen (and Be More Chill, but there weren’t many gif-able videos then considering it ran for a month in New Jersey in 2015 and there was only one yet-to-resurface 35 minute bootleg) so i just grabbed a random gif off of google. i really should get to replacing it with a new header of my own though. i just don’t know what i should do for it.

what’s your post with the most notes?

i have lost track of how many notes it has (i think it’s somewhere around 200 now?) but when Will Roland and George Salazar performed Two Player Game on Good Morning America, i posted a screencap of their Jeremy and Michael along with that one quiz answer meme that says stuff like ‘i want to see it grow up healthy’. i didn’t tag it with any ship names or anything because i was anxious about having it show up in the tags, but somebody who reblogged it from me did tag it as boyf riends and i firmly believe it took off because of that. i don’t think i make posts that are relevant enough to amass thousands of notes, even by accident. which is probably a good thing bc if i did i would have to block so many of them.

how many followers do you have?

on this blog? 175 according to the counter. how many of those are still real people and how many are bots and abandoned accounts? i have no idea.

how many people do you follow?

i try to keep it somewhere around 200. i think i’m sitting at 180 right now but i kind of need to go through and clear out the really inactive blogs.

have you made a shitpost?

let’s think about this for a second. i’ve been on tumblr for nearly 10 years. you might even be able to say i’ve made more than one. they’re just not what you would call...popular shitposts.

how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ post?

that stuff makes me so incredibly anxious that i have to fight the urge to want to yeet my laptop or mobile device through the closest window whenever i read it, so i try very hard to avoid any sort of ‘if you don’t reblog this, i’m judging you’ posts. i find them very manipulative and not particularly helpful

do you like tag games?

yeah babey!! i just frequently forget to do them, but please know that if you have ever tagged me in a tag game i felt incredibly touched by the gesture and the @mention even if i completely forgot to do the thing afterward

do you like ask games?

i do! but also rip to literally anyone who has ever sent me an ask meme bc it takes me so long to answer them. i’m still working on a micro fic prompt from a few weeks ago. also, horrified to realized that it has in fact been a few weeks and not 3 days anymore.

which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

i don’t know that any are tumblr famous as a whole. but probably @neverheardnothing

do you have a crush on a mutual?

in any sort of romantic connotation? no. not that i’m aware of. there are mutuals that i have friend crushes on where i want to be friends with them but i get so anxious when it comes to meeting new people that usually nothing ever comes of it. i’m really not good at small talk or other casual conversation either which, as you may or may not be able to imagine, sucks. i just wanna skip over all of the awkward introductions and ‘hey how are you, how is life, what are you doing with yourself?’ stuff. not because i don’t care about it. i do, but i think most of my friends/the people i want to be my friends are also depressed and anxious so asking these basic questions about life tends to uh. make us all nervous. and i don’t do much with my life so i always have the most boring answers anyways.

i’m not tagging anyone officially bc the @ thing has just completely given up on me at this point, but if you want to do it, go for it. and then say i tagged you so i can read it c:

#mel.rtf #abt me #tag games

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