#fuck j*s im not adding him lol

[dreamingamongthestars]

A Comprehensive List of Max's Dads

1. Christian (No. 1 Dad Ever. Adores him cares for him supports him celebrates him compliments him he's his baby boy and can do no wrong in his eyes <333)

2. Fernando (war criminals support war criminals. the only driver Max fanboyed over)

3. Jeffrey Dean Morgan now????? Parasocially?????

4. Does Helmut count as a theoretical peepaw

5. Seb, the only driver to wait for him after Silvertone 2021 to check if he's ok :,))) Also red bull golden boys

6. And who could ever forget GP. He puts up with maxs bs but he loves him for who he is and that's what matters 🥰🥰🥰🥰

[sempsimps]

Drunk Alastor x (fem reader)

oof here we go second fanfic ever, i loved the support i got from the first one and honestly i was confused and inspired (sorry if my writing sucks :] but im taking advice and using ,'s also this took me a week to write lol) also its a little head cannon of mine but i feel like Alastor would actually really like Shakespeare idfk

tags;

nsfw

angst with comfort

description of a panic attack (writing from experience oop)

sub Alastor soft dom reader (be gentle he's sensitive lmao)

drinking ikik shock horror

some biting and hickeys mentioned

blowing off steam i guess

might be ooc becuse I've never written (anything) Alastor before

more tags to cum :P

i hate to say it but mimzy was right, put on some jazz and pour some rye and alastor becomes a kitten, so i did just that. when husk left he was my only cover from mimzy so i was stuck with her. all she talked about was either alastor and her "amazing dancing skills" 'yeah right, yesh talk about self centred' it was so obvious she liked alastor more than a friend but t did apreaciate the tips even if she didnt know we were a thing, the whole loan shark situation clearly was the last straw for alastor especially after lucifers whole uh well "fight", he claimed to have to let off some steam with the loan sharks but i could see right through him, although i secretly cheered when alastor told mimzy to leave the hotel the irritation was clear on alastors face his smile seeming off and so with my newly learned information to use i turn to husk he seemed shaken as well.

"yo husk you wouldn't happen to have a full bottle of rye?"

he looked at me one eyebrow raised and turned around to a locked box with a padlock and everything from under the counter 'the fuck'.

"i know you and al are uh whatever the fuck you are but j-just don't tell him i gave this to you because well hell probably make me pay in some way"

"oh, okay then no problem i wont say a thing"

Husk handed me the bottle 'oh shit okay then he really loves ....' i turn the bottle to read the label, it said straight whiskey 'ah that makes so much sense, okay' i slowly nod at husk as he opened two more bottles 'oh shit that bad okay then' i gave him an awkward salute and walked off the bottle in hand, i headed to my room to grab a blanket and my speaker thing to play jazz/electro swing from my playlist with some of my favourites on there, after todays events i knew that he would need a drink and i wanted to save husk some trouble and ya know spend time with al. so i got to work setting up i had the only spare key to his private study and i thought that the swampy area would look nice, i brought a black and red plaid picnic blanket from my room to put on the ground using random rocks to keep the corners in place i found a short stool it was wooden and looked right at home in this room the deer accents on the legs added a nice touch i used that to place a candle, it said it was "black cherry" on the label 'that name isn't really fitting the candle its red, but it certainty dose smell like cherries' i placed it onto the wooden surface i stood up and walked towards the wooden side of the room looking back at my small display and smiled 'not as shit as i thought it would look, improvement !' i looked around the room and found some glasses they were cool looking 'oooo fancy' i set onto the stool along with the untouched bottle of rye, i connected the speaker to my phone Alastor disliked the fact i had it to begin with but accepted it as a safety measure if i ever needed it which he made sure i didn't, anyway the devices connected and the first song posing started to play i nodded my head along before i left the room i made sure to light the candle 'okay now to find the unusually grumpy deer' i exit his study and locked the door behind me, the rest of the staff and residents were off in their rooms or busy with somthing, it was quite late now. i heard the click of the lock and pocketed the key and off to search for the strawberry man, it didn't take me long to hear the static and loud screeches coming from the lobby i was now hurried in my steps i approached the sound of Alastor and seen him leaning over the bar half demon mode towering over husk his antlers protruding from his head and the green symbols slowly floating around him, no doubt dials in his eyes.

"husk for your own soul,where is it!?"

"i told you b-boss its not here"

'oh shit oh shit oh fuck, okay i fucked up' i seen husk slightly trembling ears pulled back, wings tucked behind him and our eyes meet he asked for help silently, i half ran and half jogged towards Alastor, i gently tugged at his coat getting a large radio feedback screech jumping a little at the sound, before he turned around around with an audible snap to see me and i reacted by rushing out my words.

"hey! al i know you hate being touched but i didn't know how to get your attention safely but that's not important right now! come with me"

i spoke rapidly briefly confusing the deer he froze. antlers going back to normal shape and size before i kinda dragged him out of the lobby towards his study by the tail of his coat giving husk a last look of apology, i felt a light tug at my wrist and i let him go immediately and i held my head down in slight embarrassment as we walked down a hallway.

"although i don't completely despise the touch from you my dear, but-"

"no no its okay sorry i know i pushed a boundary. just didn't know how else i was suppose to calm the situation and uh i have the rye Mimzy said you liked it so i asked husk for some that's why he uhh didn't have it...."

i seen his eye twitch momentarily as we walked. the silence was deafening low sound of static emitting from him echoing in the hallway eerily, but as we got closer to his study his ears fluttered up at the muffled soft sound of jazz that was coming from the room, his slightly strained smile fell into a smirk his whole face softening, he snapped his fingers to open his study greeted by the set picnic blanket and the sent of the candle wafted in the air masking the dead venison that was all around in this room with cherries instead.

"i know its not a lot but i thought it would help with the shitty day you've had, well i don't even know what to call the thing you got with lucifer.... b-but that's besides the point i just thought i would keep you company if you need too vent or just relax"

"thank you my dear, i appreciate the gesture"

his smile was soft as he walked over to the blanket and sat down i slowly trailed behind him, he took of his coat and folded in onto the stool his dress shirt looking a little dishevelled as he unclipped his bowtie resting it on top 'oh thank fuck i was scared he would be mad or kill husk, welp he isn't so ill take that as a win' i sat next to Alastor and he opened the whisky and poured us both a glass, his glass had more in it 'i guess he dose need this' Alastor sighed and took a large sip leaning back onto his elbows landing just at the end of the blanket i took a swig of my glass feeling the strong liquor on my tongue my eyes squinted at the taste.

"hey.....do you want to talk about it?"

the silence was now more comforting now the white noise of Alastor's static taking a soft spot within the wordless jazz songs, i still held my glass and decided to quickly down it i felt like i needed it for this conversation, it is liquid courage after all. he obviously felt the same taking a sip before answering.

"i didn't want to send Mimzy away.... we were in the same circles when alive... she's a dear friend of mine! but the danger she carries with her often causes trouble due to her very nature"

his ears pinned back to his head his smile straining ever so slightly his eyes showing his true emotion as he carried his rant i listened intently as he's now sitting up.

"and-and i just loath this feeling of being so controlled i was.... sad? to make her go but they made me! i feel that I've betrayed her my dear"

his head rested in his hands covering the sides his face, body hunched over suddenly his eyes scrunched closed in pain? 'wait pain!?' hands moving to his throat wrapping around like he was choking laboured breathing could be heard, his slight shivers running throughout his body, ears twitching, opening his eyes focused on the grass in front him the body movements seizing up smile ever present 'oh fuck uuhhh i need to do somthing' my voice slightly wavers as i softly spoke to not scare him.

"hey hey hey al its gonna be okay hey....'

i knelt to face him slowly putting my hands in front of were his eyes were focusing on the floor as to not scare him, the grip around his head and neck loosened and he removed his hands to place them gently in mine, they were shaking so i closed my hands around his softly. i looked towards his face his eyes were shut closed to try too banish the tears smile still present but barely holding emotion i knew he hated to show weakness so this was a very rare occurrence but the distress was clear. he moved my hands to his face i let him guide me so he could be in control, he reviled in the soft contact calming himself down, his breathing evened out and i felt heat leave his face and his body relaxed as he leaned back onto the blanket pulling me with him and i lay next to his form.

"heyyy al i know this is.... difficult but ill always be here. okay? ill always be here for you no matter what"

"t thank you...."

no words were said from there as we both had another glass clinking them before downing it each laying down again, i softly rub my thumb against his palm to be comforting 'im not good at this shit'. i sigh and i let go and reached out to refill my drink again i lifted it to my lips the smooth jazz ended and the next song on was "eat you by carnival of thieves" and i only had a sip of my fourth drink before i was on my feet 'when did he get up!' i placed the glass down on the stool.

"come on my dear lets dance!"

"are you sure?"

"why wouldn't i be?"

i looked to his face he seemed happier now 'ah alright then, glad he got that out' i linked hands with Alastor he pulled me into him almost crashing into his chest. i looked up to see in his eyes now looking at me with soft passion as we danced along the grassy area of the room, my feet not as accustomed to dancing as my steps were out of rhythm to the surprising fast pace of the song, Alastor just laughed in response and he carefully moved in step to guide me, hips swaying to the sound. our feet now moving in sync to the beat of the song, he looked happy as he started to sing to the song joining in staggering my steps and signing along to the chorus.

"i go hungry every night~ ,but not this time around~~.... I'm gonna eat you, your my desire~"

"im gonna sharpen all my teeth and build a fire~"

"im gonna eat you~ ,cook and defeat you~ ,gonna breath you in my lungs and make you mine~"

his hands loosened in mine as we gently moved across the grass together letting all the stress of the day be released in the playful dancing. Alastor spun me around with a fancy flourish carefully so his face could rest in my neck, as the slower verse played we began to slowly sway back and forth i accidentally stepped on his foot from the odd angle

"oh shit sorry"

"haha don't worry my dear it was an accident"

"okay still sorry though"

" l'amour ne regarde pas avec les yeux mais avec l'esprit, donc Cupidon ailé est peint en aveugle" (love does not look with the eyes but with the mind, so winged Cupid is painted blind)

"such a charmer as always my love"

once the song ended we continued to dance together for many more enjoying the time we had, until i tripped on a rock falling backwards Alastor caught me with one hand on the small of my back other one still in my hand he made it look like this was practiced and i wasn't a dumbass 'wow maybe I've to much to drink already' i was pulled back onto both feet before being lead to sit down.

"maybe that's enough for now my dear wouldn't want you falling for me again, the run of true smooth never love course. wait no that's not right"

i rolled my eyes as we laid together yet again having another drink each Alastor having two, i was feeling giddy from the whiskey and so was he showing his more comfortable loving side that was a rare sight, his hands resting on my hip tracing circles not that he doesn't do all of this already but he was letting me do the same guiding my hands to his side to mimic his movements tracing patterns as we just talked together enjoying the company but the funny thing is that Alastor is a lightweight when it comes to drinking so its not even after the 5th round he is slurring his words around.

"these mortals be fools lord what!"

"uh huh?"

"in shine ink my may black still bright love"

"al what are you talking about?"

we laughed and talked some more but Alastor rolled my body to lay upon his, maybe it was the drinks were getting to both our heads but Alastor face was slightly red and i was feeling a little hot under the collar myself, sighing adjusting my position on top of Alastor i moved down to feel somthing against my thigh 'oh what the hell?- OH' my eyes snapped back up to meet his gaze that was looking away ears pointed flat against his head face competing for his hair shade.

"oh shit i uh i can get off?"

only response i got was a tight grip at my hips when i was about to get off, i felt claws lightly scratching at the skin holding me in place my face getting red 'oh shit okay then' and a low static emitting from his chest it was similar to a purr 'heh like a cat cute', i attempt to sit up only to have a harsh grip on my hips, i lightly tapped his hand so i could do that i sat up my thighs on either sides of his form feeling his excitement more prominent against my thigh 'i did not think that's how this would go' i slowly move against him grinding my hips in a slow rhythm looking at his face for conformation his eyes darted away ears still back but he didn't look upset in the slightest.

"you okay?"

i leaned down softly kissing his lips his pressed hard into mine savouring every moment 'he was touch starved has to be' moving my hand down to unbutton my shirt once down i sat back up to slide it off my body before i unbutton Alastor's dress shirt looking to his face for confirming it was okay which he gave a nod still grinding in my body i moved harsher and then i heard it. i halted myself completely 'holy shit this man whimpers' wide eyed he stared at my face i started to move again eliciting another breathy gasp and whimper. i reached down between our bodies to undo his belt with little effort and let his arousal out, the heat from it was intoxicating, as the precum smearing on my thigh my hand wrapped around it surprisingly big, plenty to fill me 'Jesus fuck he looks amazing' Alastor whimpers a little as i slowly pumped his length more low and quite sounds spilling from his lips i leaned down hands either side of his face to keep myself balanced his tongue asked for entry and i allowed it as i swallowed every sound he made i was getting out of breath and pulled away from the passionate kiss my body still moving against Alastor. his hands claw at my hips silently begging asking me to speed up, i lightly grasp at his wrists with both hands before i gripped them and pinned his hands either side of his head, ears perked up the look of shock and "fuck, do i find this hot?" in his face was worth dying for as i continued the teasing slow pace against his length he could easily stop me. he was powerful enough to, but he didn't, he let me take the lead and overpower him. i increased my speed feeling his ever heightening arousal he was quite vocal I'm guessing it was the alcohol because he doesn't tend to be like this the endless gasps filling the room 'holy fuck who would of thought that the great radio demon would want to be under me' i suddenly heard a low growl from his lips.

"stop teasing me dear"

"okay i will"

i moved my shorts and underwear to the side and lowered myself onto Alastor both of us crying out in pleasure as i fully went down, i didn't move 'fuck this feels so good fuck' i stayed still letting us both get comfortable again looking to him for a nod, in which he provided biting his lip. i slowly moved up and down along his length eliciting gasps from both parties. i had only moved so much before Alastor thrusted desperately into me needing the release i matched his pace quickly approaching my climax as i felt his cock twitch inside of me, the slick that pooled between my legs serving more than enough to glide it constant praise falling from my lips the demon under me turning into putty, a string of i love yous and gasps mixed with moans the outside world oblivious to us. i felt my body shake as i was close to cuming my thighs shudder as i hit my high, body slumping forward to kiss his lips. Alastor kept thrusting up into me he growled and snarled as he back arched and teeth sank into my collar bone, cock twitching as he came into me we both laid there in each others embrace finding comfort in one other as he lapped at the bite wound in apology. i phased in and out of sleep listing to his heartbeat 'I'm surprised he even has one' i felt him sit up keeping my body pressed to his.

"eh bien, c'était du sexe splendide, ma chérie"

Alastor took his cock out of me pushing it back into his boxers before he picked me up and walked us towards the wooden area of the room and opened a door into his actual bedroom laying us both down on his bed peacefully sleeping in the warmth of our bodies.

sorry if the ending seemed rushed i am completing this before i need to be up in like an hour and this has been driving me mental for a week sorry if my writing sucks :]

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Its the end of the year! Which means its time to post the

Tags That Made Me Smile 2022

The following are a collective list of tags, author notes, and fic names that i saw on ao3 and tumblr that made me either laugh or smile. Ive separated them by fandom but a good amount arent actually fandom specific. Ive added the character names or fandom at the end like {name} to clarify who the tag is talking about

[2021's list]

Author Specific / Non-Specific

i saw canon; acknowledged it; And promply burned it in a dirty trash can thanks; Have this instead

Give me pain I need to feel something

this is self projection thank you coming to my ted talk

Whats that?? Overused tropes that everyone has seen before????? Pfffffffft. This fic is literally just a big mess of "how can I cater to myself and myself only"

you ever just look at your life and wonder how you got here; bc that's what this fic is for me

Don't underestimate me I DO NOT know how long this fan-fic will be

can you tell my target audience is myself

this is content specifically catered to me and no one else

these characters are my landlords and i pay them rent

P O L Y A M O R Y   I S   M Y   P O L Y J A M O R Y

cheek kiss warning

kidnapping isn’t sexy don’t do it

i've never read the archie comics but that's not gonna stop me {archie sonic}

not me writing a whole fic for a ship only i care about; that like maybe two other people ship; rowing this boat is hard but someone has to do it {scourge x fleetway sonic}

ankles don't heal this fast but fuck it i do what i want

no beta we die like men; or rather we drown like the sad shipper with a pool noodle we are

I'm afraid of the Danimals mascot and you should be too

if you're getting flood warnings, don't worry. It's just MY TEARS!

me at every character: anxiety be upon ye

Me (Grabs canon and runs a marathon with it)

Quote: Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he's created (Spy Kids) {tmnt crossover}

Alternate Universe - Monty Python and the Holy Grail

contains dangerous amount of bed based snuggling

(kind of its a very short very homosexual fight scene); and then they kiss.

Hostage situation takes a romantic turn???? Not clickbait????

enemies to frenemies

Improper Use of Pool Noodles

stone cold stoicism meeting determined stupidity

Star Wars

Kanan Jarrus: The Daddening

platonic love is what healed his lonely existence {din djarin}

when in doubt: road trip with the besties {din, boba, fennec}

Soul Eater

found family at its finest {kid, liz, patty}

The Witcher

wife (platonic) {yennskier}

at first I was like haha geralt and Istredd should kiss as a joke…. but bro I don’t think it’s a joke anymore….

Sonic the Hedgehog

Movie!Super Sonic is made out of LOVE no one touch me

Sonics gay awakening I guess

sonic movie 2 made me make an ao3 account lol

Sonic was made to love people

Two Bros Chillin’ in an ER Five Feet Apart ‘cause they’re not gay {sonic x shadow}

the most dangerous thing is to love {shadow}

Trapped in a small box with just enough room to face some feelings {sonic x shadow}

the R in rivalry stand for romance {sonic x shadow}

The L in Rivalry Stands For 'Love' {sonic x shadow}

A Largely Platonic Cave

i love boom!shadow so naturally i made him even more insufferable

Sad-ow

Wachowskis holdin it down in the bg; Absolute champs

I love how Shadow is just so mindbogglingly utterly done with reality

Knuckles is a guardian of all things great and small

“Would you kiss a worm?" “If he was cute as fuck? Yeah.” {wade x stone}

"What is this made of, bendable titanium?!" "INCORRECT. IT IS MADE OF THE FRUSTRATIONS OF MOTHERS EVERYWHERE." {team dark}

featuring a scourge that trips far too much because it's my fic and I said so {scourge x fleetway sonic}

no thoughts just soft hedgehog moments

listen if im going to die at the hands of injured lancelot shit i might as well take advantage of it

Everyone has a crush on Lancelot and I'll die on this hill

fairy Lancelot Fairy Lancelot FAIRY LANCELOT!!!

TMNT

Slow Burn; mostly on april's end of things; casey and donnie are basically on fire right off the bat {tmnt 2012}

Rise!Donnie and 2012!Casey be out there committing arson together for their first date >.>

Please enjoy Casey, the fool, realizing his feelings for Donnie, another fool {tmnt 2012}

Draxum and Splinter are the turtles' dads (it's a reluctant partnership)

just two absolute powerhouses holding each other gently {raph x mona}

“There’s nothing wrong with the way you love, Dee. Goodnight.” {rottmnt}

Wondering what to do when the apocalypse happens? Easy: fly across the country and get Vegas-married. That's definetley an appropriate reaction that won't involve your complicated feelings towards your roommate at all {hypno x warren}

Look rise are weapons of war 12 were accidents and I play with that HARD in this fic

"GET IN THE TURTLE TANK BITCHES WE GOING TO FAMILY THERAPY" {rottmnt}

Donatello is now Dad-Atello {rottmnt}

The other [Casey] is out on a beach in Tahiti; It's what he deserves after surviving the Krang {rottmnt}

Leo is now actively being hunted for sport; (the only sport Donnie is good at) {rottmnt}

These turtles can fit so much trauma

2018 Karai lives because fuck Nick; Casey x Donnie x April are a healthy ship and also fuck nick again

I cant be the only one pissed by Leo's and Karais 'love interest plot'; Leonardo's weird feelings were simply gender envy...Yes that is canon now {tmnt 2012}

What happens when two "dudes" call each other 'girlfriend'; Transgender activities, that's what! {tmnt 2012}

splinter is twice divorced and never married {rottmnt}

Papatello / Dadatello {rottmnt}

draxum's gone from dadxum to grand-dadxum good for him

HOLY FUCKING SHIT YES YES YES YES; GRANDPA BARRY COMING IN CLUTCH

draxum just be like gramps still got it; and by 'it' i mean a complete lack of forethought for care when creating random children

Puts the Bi in Bitchless {rottmnt leo}

its because ninja turtles

feral mamatello {rottmnt}

Marvel

it's the anguish, the self flagellation, the audacity to love the man who annihilate ur nation and killed ur mother; your m o t h e r {black panther}

[beautifulpersonpeach]

HOBI IS WORKING WITH JCOLE I REPEAT HOBI IS WORKING WITH JCOLE AHHHHH

Our boys are really industry heavyweights at this point, aren’t they BPP???? They really just out here casually collabing with their favorite artists growing up like Hobi just dropped the news that he collabed with The J.Cole the day before his single drops 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 Am I wrong to think that they really earned these artists respect for them to even think to collab with them????Like I doubt J.Cole needs Hobi/BTS clout lmao and even Erykah Badu came out to do a song with Namjoon and I’m convinced Chris Martin is in love with Jin atp lmao like atp I’m convinced that RIHANNA X RAPLINE OR BEYONCE X JIMIN ISNT A FARFETCHED DREAM OF US DELULUS LIKE ITS NOT AN IMPOSSIBILITY BUT A REAL POSSIBILTY NOW

IM SO PROUD AND I LOVE THIS FOR THEM YOU GO BOYS

*

Ask 2: OMG I LOVE THAT TEASER MELODY!!!!!!! I think Imma love that song!! I'm so excited (and sad. AND WITH JCOLE HIS INSPIRATION OMMMMGGGGG I'm so happy. I'm SO giddy. lol I'm really glad to have this music. I needed them cuz I'm doing a competition on release day. I was feeling anxious. If it's going to be blue side esque, I'll just listen to this nonstop to calm myself down. Also Jimin Tiffany?? He looks fantastic. I hope there's ads, I'll go to the shops just to see him (I HATE both usually lol)

*

Ask 3: BPPPPPPPPP I'M CRYING THIS SONG IS EVERYTHING EVERYTTHING I LOVE HIM WITH ALL MY HEART

*

Ask 4: Jermaine Lamarr Cole respects Jung Hoseok and made a song with him fuck I'm gone. Bpp, how you feeling?

**

Hi Anon(s),

I don't even know where to begin.

I just wrote possibly what is my most effusively adoring Jimin post and maybe it's also the lack of sleep making me slightly delirious but I nearly burst into tears just now trying to reply to you talking about Hobi. Because y'all, my emotions are completely fried right now. Hobi has completely wrecked and destabilized me with On The Street. Part of the reason I'm here is because of how happy I feel, and it is 100% the result of his music, that song in particular, and what it confirms to me for the umpeenth time about who Hoseok is.

Y'all, I'm so happy for him. Like I'm sitting on my couch, wig off, feet up, running my hands down my face every two seconds through my hair clutching my fro to ground myself while On The Street plays on surround sound.

Everything about On The Street is perfect. I'll write an actual review once I've calmed down but Jesus it's so fucking good.

J Cole is an artist notorious for pulling no punches and being real with the music he makes and who he makes it with. Like Jermaine is one of a handful of rappers that Kendrick gives full cred to. I've been fighting the urge to scream since this song dropped like y'all have no idea how incredible, how legendary this collaboration is precisely because of the sort of artist both J Cole and J-hope are, and I can only imagine how Hobi feels right now.

All the guys are meeting their heroes and rather than it being an unpleasant experience, they've all developed so much as artists already that their first collaborations with their heroes is mutually satisfying and underpinned by mutual respect.

Everything about this song is so beautiful and I hope you're able to enjoy listening to it very often.

[hoodharlow]

blancaaaaa can we have like the full names of the dad!sos girlies and like what do they all do and maybe just maybe a lil background abt them. im just curious yk 😌😌

i'm assuming my oc's lol

Alexis Ximena->

Occupation- actress, model, Nico's mami, singer/back up vocals for Aaliyah, Aaliyah's bestie

From- Oakland, CA

Met Cal in 2019 when 5sos performed at the J*m*s C*rd*n show when she was promoting her show

Aaliyah ->

Occupation- singer-songwriter, producers, unofficial 5th member of 5sos

From- Oakland, CA

Met Luke 2019 when she was helping write Easier

Marina ->

Occupation- model later fashion magazine photographer/ stylist

From- Phoenix, Arizona

Met Ashton in early 2020 when they filmed a Tom Ford cologne ad

Fiona ->

Occupation- CFO of her brother and sister in law's tech company

From- Sonoma but moved to Connecticut when her brother got custody of her and went to school at MIT (Eliza went to school with Aaliyah's older sister and they're shook to see that they know each other lmao)

Met Michael in 2015 and hooked up with him at a show but they never kept in touch until a tech party in late 2018 where they fucked lmao

[arlecchno]

oh good lord , h i hope you know what youve gotten yourself into by asking for the fic … [insert evil laughter here] okay okay now actually , the fic series doesnt focus on serial killers it was just that one fic in the series , but the serial killer fic is Blind Mirror (linked) by StrangeDiamond on Ao3 !!!! i have the print copies of the series (behold my collection) i think i also have to mention that its not an xreader fic lol

songs of resistance isnt part of the series but yaknow whatever . the ragnvindr brothers are a passion of mine and theyre my favorites i love them so much SHIDJSKDKD AND WHILE WERE ON THE TOPIC OF FIC RECS if you just so happen to have my horrid taste in men (/hj ?????) and like alhaitham , heres another one of my absolute favorite fics , i just call it Summers Fic (i hope these links are working properly lmao) and its got our favorites !!! murder / crimes , slowburn , (kinda) enemies to lovers (i fucking love the banter the author writes between mc and haitham) , + forensics stuff !! which is totally my jam because im a stupid little science gremlin .

you saying my board looks cool is so funny to me because like its a literal stock image , and while i couldve gone without it , low quality stock images just make me giggle for no reason so .. its also a little surprising you think its detailed because when i was making it i felt like i had to condense so much information for textbox space😭😭

i actually do a handful of things in the arts department , ive written my own little short stories and poems , and every once in a blue moon (when i have enough motivation) i make games ! granted theyre not very good , because im pretty sure im jackshit at characterization LOL heres a silly authors note i put in one of my short story docs just cuz why not honestly

also , YES I AM A DAIN LOVER IM ACTUALLY HIS BOYFRIEND (REAL) /j . all the khaenriah boys in general are my little sillies (i say as if they arent older than me) SO IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK ABOUT DAIN WITH MY MESSAGES ARE OPEN (and i am more than willing to spout theorist nonsense about him and the other khaenriahn boys as well)

also you absolutely do not have to worry about your wording of anything , none of it came off negatively at all ! i think youre very nice lmao

heres a little question to end off because im running out of creative ways to signoff , do you kin anyone from genshin ?

hoping the images dont glitch out ,

- jellyfish

OHHH WAIT i think i've heard of that kaeya and diluc novel thingy??? i'm pretty sure i've seen them around twitter or tiktok some time ago and omg i should check them out then!!! those covers look so good maybe i'll actually get around with the whole series now that you've mentioned it

and omg that summers fic you just linked is already so amazing. you've captured my taste in genshin men perfectly (i say as i drool over alhaitham). i just finished with the first chapter and the author have really captured my heart with the bits of forensics and crime, adding on with the tinge of arab culture too!!! i'm gonna go ahead and read them when i have the time hehe

you do short stories... poems... AND GAMES???? hello am i seeing this right

(p/s: i low-key do those kinds of a/n in my google docs draft for ma too... but they just never made it to the finalized version 😔)

and actually dain is in bed with me rn idk what you're talking about 🙄🙄🙄 /j

me personally i am very interested in khaenriah lore but i really haven't gotten to it (tbh the overall lore of the game is a lot to take in) but i probably will someday,, if i am not lazy /hj

and honestly... i don't exactly know who i kin in genshin tbh. so i have decided to take this VERY extensive genshin kin quiz (as per what they've named their site) and surprisingly i got... collei?

though when i read this, it made me realize that, maybe i do kin her. whoops

okay i'm heading to bed now it's 1 am and i'm busy tomorrow 😔 it was nice talking with you again jellyfish !!! have a nice day 🫶

[bbybrainrot]

Oh shit my first post.

Hi my name is Claire and I present to you my A-Z fluff headcannons for Bakugou Katsuki. My king.

A= activites- what do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

— This boy enjoys anything where he has a chance to make you smile and see it happen. He doesn't enjoy things like going to the movies because he won't be able to talk to you, but things like coffee dates and going to the mall he would be totally down for.

— Bakugou is one the kind of person where even though they have free time, they still have things they may want to do. That being said, he always makes sure you are at the most 15 feet away from him while doing said thing. Even if he’s just trying out a new recipe and you're sitting on the couch fidgeting with your phone. That's all he needs.

B=beauty- what do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

— This may be weird but he admires how much common sense you have, being he's the one that runs head first into crazy ideas and issues, having you gives him the feeling of being balanced. He always trusts you to make the right decisions for the both of you.

— The thing he thinks is beautiful about you is your shoulders and your back. He enjoys how you relax around him when he pulls you into a hug. Again, you give him that sense of being balanced.

C=comfort- How would they help their s/o during hard times or when they need it most?

— LOL. This man can barely handle his own emotions, how do you think he is going to handle yours. But in all seriousness as soon as you started crying he would have not the slightest idea of how to help you. He would probably try hugging you, but in the most stiff and awkward way. So awkward in fact it even stifled a laugh out of you.

D= dreams- how do they picture their future with their s/o?

— As a person who really doubts himself deep down on the inside. He decided that once he found that someone who really loved him for him, he was never going to let them go. This being said he already decided he IS going to marry you, it's just a matter of when.

E= equal- are they the dominant one or are they more passive in your relationship?

— I see him as the one who is always on you about your well being and not about the things you do. He has enough respect to understand that just because you're his, it doesn't mean he owns you. Still, he just always wants to know you're okay.

F= Flirting- how often do they flirt or tease their s/o? How smooth are they?

— This smug bastard is a damn good flirt.

— He is the smoothes man on the freakin planet. He KNOWS what he's doing.

— Will not hesitate to drop his voice a few octaves, wrap his hands around your waist and growl in your ear just to get what he wants.

G= Gratitude- How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o does for them?

— Katsuki is extremely grateful. His mom raised him to be thankful if nothing else.

— He notices the things you does for him, and always expresses how lucky he is to have you

H=Honesty- do they have any secret that they keep from their s/o or do they share everything

— If there was one thing he would keep from you, it would be how he treated deku when they were younger. Although if you were to come and ask about it, he wouldn't lie.

I=Inspiration- did their s/o change something about them or is it the other way around? (it could be personal issues or just trying new day to day things)

— To him you make home feel like home. Before you moved in with each other, he would have never called the place where he lived home.

— But now you moved in and added a little bit of you everywhere. Your favorite blanket on the couch, your shampoo next to his in the shower, and his favorite pictures of you two on the wall. He noticed all these little things and loved them all.

J=jealousy- do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

— Whew… here we go.

— First off it's never your fault, most of the time you were completely oblivious. Just walking into places with you he could see the way heads turned to look at you, all the while you were playing with the veins on his hand as you held it. It made him content in a way. It warmed his heart how you were only focused on him.

— But also how dare those people look at you.

K=kiss- how do they kiss? What was the first kiss like?

—I love the idea the katsuki tastes like caramel and brown sugar and HEAVEN and im gonna fucking stand by it.

— He's very heavy on the tongue. But he's not sloppy and overwhelming about it.

— Kisses with him rarely stay on the lips. Kisses on your jaw and neck.

— Enough to leave you flustered but not needy.

— When he's done he always kisses you on the forehead.

L=Love confession- How did it go down?

— It was your sixth or seventh dinner date, this one was at your place because you were trying to convince him you could cook just as well as he can.

— There you guys are sitting on your couch after dinner snuggled up watching a movie. You had fallen asleep on his chest. Hair tickling his nose. He looks down to see you snoring, your serene face looking so content. He leans down and gives your forehead a kiss.

— “I love you y/n”

— The look on this man's face when you snuggle in closer to him and whisper.

— “I love you too Katsuki”

— Is one of pure bliss.

M=Marriage- do they want to get married? How do they propose? Wedding day description?

— When he proposes, he does without a care in the world. Just one late night on the couch when suddenly he asks

— “Can we get married now?”

— The way you choke on air is hilarious

— “LiKe right NoW!!?!”

— “No dumbass in a couple of weeks or months..i don't know,,ANSWER THE QUESTION”

— “Yes, we can get married sure.”

— And from that point you didnt lift a fucking FINGER. He called his mom the very next day telling her you were going to need a dress (completely ignoring the screaming coming from his mother's end) Called his friends and asked Izuku to do all the intense planning.

— There was lots of orange and green

N=nicknames- what do they call their s/o?

— “You look cute baby”

— “Love ya....dumASS!”

O=Obsessed- how protective are they of their s/o? How much are they worried about them?

— He would end the fucking world for you. NO questions asked. Whatever you needed he would do for you.

— He knows you can protect yourself, hell, you remind him of that fact constantly. However he likes to make in known that he is there as back up as extra consequence

P=PDA- are they obvious about the relationship? Do they talk a lot about his s/o? Are they okay with affection in front of others?

— A doesn't feel the need to hide anything. If he wants to kiss he's going to, and that just fact.

— Will definitely boast about how great you are and rub it in to his friends all the amazing things to do for him.

— Will not admit it out loud but this man is putty in your hand and your wish is his command.

Q= Quirk- some random ability they have in a relationship

— Gives the BEST massages. His hand are already so warm and huge and…(this is fluff and i almost forgot)

R=Romance- how romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o smile? Are their ideas rather original or creative?

— Not the most extreme romantic. Can be when the time calls for it, but mostly enjoys that fact that you are there with him, rather than focusing on anything else.

— He finds that when he complains and bitches about his day it make you smile. (he has heard that he has a very expressive face)

S=support- do they push their s/o to do better? Do they believe in them?

— Katsuki is the one person in your life you will alway be able to depend on.

— WIll do whatever they need to do to help you achieve your goals.

T=thrill- are they okay with a certain routine or do they need some spice every once in a while?

— Routine is this boy's best friend. He likes coming home knowing what to expect and what to prepare for.

— All though he doesn't hate surprises and is always down for some spur of the moment fun.

U=Understanding- how well do they know you? Are they sensitive to your emotion?

— To Katsuki keeping you happy is his number one goal. This means he knows all the things that you love and like to do, and he tries to bring them up as much as possible.

— That being said, your happiness is really all he understands. I mean he can tell you are upset. But would have no clue how to go about it.

V=Value- how important is your relationship compared to other things in their life?

— In his mind, as long as he has you, everything will be alright. Meaning he puts you above all else, because you lead him forwards.

W=Wild card-Random Fluff bomb!!

— Katsuki likes to spoil you. You mean the world to him, and he knows he doesn't say it enough.

— Which means clothes, shoes and maybe even that new mixer (which he kinda wants as well) will just appear in your house giving no choice but to accept them.

X=XOXO- how affectionate are they? Are they a cuddle bug or do they like their space?

— Shows you he loves you more physically than saying it out loud.

— Will take any chance he can to cuddle when at home.

Y=Yearning- how do they cope when they miss you?

— Like shit. You are a big stress reliever for him and he normally has you there to make him feel better. But if you're not there not only does he miss you but he also has no one to really talk to. Therefore turning him into a grumpy monster

Zzz- how do you both fall asleep/nap

— Is the big spoon.

— He likes to sleep behind you so he can place his head in the crook of your neck.

— Other times he likes to completely lay out on top of you with his hands around your waist and his face on your stomach or chest.

——————————————————————————————————————————

Thanks for reading babes.

MY REQUEST BOX IS OPEN PLEASE IM SO BORED AT HOME. ( I do Headcannons, short blurbs, and maybe scenarios) 

Also be chaotic in my ask box I don’t mind ☺️

[stronghours]

CUSTOMER SERVICE

E T S Y

Darling Fallon    Sep 3, 2013

Sensational (sin-sational!). i write on behalf of myself (S) and my lover (m). we have been ripped off by bulk-produced molded hoods before and i can only say HAND CUT LATEX ONLY never look back!! worth the money and will eventually pay for itself. neck fit like loving glove and adds dynamic intensifier to breathplay. Lovely proprietor replied prompt when “m” had questions re: breathability (she added extra breathing hole at no extra cost). class acts all around (and not just in our dungeon!) will return for more but “m” needs a break first if u get the drift lol1!! thanks to lady j!

Purchased item: DeMarco FetishWear – Latex Chrysalis Hood (translucent…

3 Helpful

  myMister   Aug 24, 2013

this one writes on behalf and with permission of MISTER. this one quaked with bliss when package arrived. truly awful to behold in the wise hands of MISTER. this one’s neck is small and delicate For His Pleasure and all item adjustments were made to order and did not affect shipping time. if this one could be so efficient For His Pleasure this one would be in heaven on earth. instead, this one is less than a hole. item truly enhanced <O sensation. without a doubt will be used over and over in this household for due punishments of this very worthless one. discrete pgk’ing. thanks to designer J for deepening this one’s service to MISTER.

(NOTE FROM MISTER – WILL PROPRIETER PLEASE PRIVATELY EMAIL TO DISCLOSE IF YOU ARE MALE/FEMALE/OTHER SO “myMister” (this one) WILL BE ABLE TO PROPERLY ADDRESS YOU IN ACCORDANCE WITH ITS FORMAL ROLE)

Purchased item: DeMarco FetishWear – Throttle Collar w/ attached Gas…

1 Helpful

  JulieJuice   August 3, 2013

LOL rip-off!!! cant believe all u ppl sucking this guys dick. says everywhere in product descript. (and you guys reviews!!) that custom sizing is no additl. cost but mine cost more!! only small alteration to titty holes cause of my cleave situation. bullshit. not buying from him again.

Response from J

Hi again Julie. If you check our many enlightening inbox conversations from 7/5-7/16 you will be reminded the additional cost was due to your request of more ring hinge insertions as the standard amount in pattern block “was not bling enough”. Cleavage was irrelevant. Sizing related alterations are always no added cost. Custom alterations requiring additional materials/effort and adjusted pricing will always be discussed and approved on client end before any exchange of payment.

Purchased item: DeMarco FetishWear – Hexagon Restrictor Harness…

HELPFUL?

  HannahCakes!    Jun 1, 2013

Hey Whats Up I’m Caleb (obviously don’t have an etsy) and using my lady’s account. She got the catsuit for my birthday and she looked so sexy like J-Lo or someone. Didn’t want her doin the latex stuff because I thought shed have to shave off all her pubes and personally i like that kind of thing a lot but no harm done. Anyway she was super sexy and the suit thing looked good and stayed together even when we started rockin. To other full bush guys out there if youre girl wants to wear the latex stuff SHE CAN KEEP HER BUSH she just has to use lube to oil up the bush that she has.

Purchased item: DeMarco FetishWear – Domina Catsuit w/ Pussycat Zipper (red…

7 Helpful

  HannahCakes!   3 months ago   Friend   Ignore

Caleb Review

Hi J,

Saw my boyfriend’s 6/1 review and I was like uh ohhh. I asked him to leave one because he went gaga over the catsuit, but I wasn’t expecting all the bush stuff. If you don’t want to be associated with that and want to delete, that’s ok on my end. A little embarrassing! – Hannah!

Reply from DeMarco FetishWear    3 months ago    Friend    Ignore

Hi Hannah. Please don’t worry about it, any positive review is welcome. His feedback has apparently hit a chord with some specific hesitations and concerns buyers have been experiencing but not confiding with me, so I plan on keeping it up for the time being. Enjoy your garment.

  JoeyoftheHerd    3 months ago   Friend   Ignore

Moo-cow snout muzzle thing – (idea i had)

Hi. Is this idea good

Reply from DeMarco FetishWear    3 months ago    Friend   Ignore

Hi Joey. Are you interested in a custom cow muzzle/mask, like the pup play masks on my page or are you just brainstorming for personal reasons?

Reply from JoeyoftheHerd    3 months ago    Friend    Ignore

idk it’s just an idea i had

Reply from DeMarco FetishWear    3 months ago    Friend    Ignore

It’s a cool idea

Reply from JoeyoftheHerd    3 months ago    Friend    Ignore

Thanks man i thought so 2

1234Brett10093456    3 months ago   Friend   Ignore

I REMEMBER YOU FROM RAWHIDE

JULES yes I know who you are and I know your name are you scared yet?? I remember when you used to hang with Roscoe out at Rawhide because Roscoe pretended to hire you because he secretly wanted to fuck and suck you till you cried and I saw all that. I have brown flippy hair, blue eyes and am tall/cut versatile but lean TOP. I know you faked being gay. You heard of bi-now-gay-later but have you heard of gay-then-straight-betrayer (you)? That is fucked up that you still sell stuff but pretend to be a gay guy because that makes your stuff sell better because the gay guys want to fuck you. I know you are faking because my muscle bud Tomas (latino) saw you making out with a ginger chick at the wet bar in Entrance last week. He said it was probably a joke but I know it wasn’t because he said he saw tongue. I wont let you be a breeder without a fight. I am willing to tell EVERYBODY YOURE SECRET. But I wont if you prove to me YOU CAN STILL BE GAY. Im attaching a pic of my cock so you know im not lying and can follow through. I will only believe YOU ARE GAY if we can see each other face/face (i can host only on fri- I have two roommates) and our cocks have to touch and you have to stay hard for at least five minutes while I suck and jack your cock and tongue your balls (shave or dont i will leave that up to you). condoms ok but if you want to be a breeder so bad maybe I will just breed your ass but if youre actually a gay guy you’ll like it and cum thick ropes as I fuck your dirty little slut hole and youll tell me youre a hole while I fuck it with the shiny precum head of my cut fucking cock (7inches erect). you will smell my hole and BECOME GAY again IT WILL HAPPEN  - Brett Costino

  TheSteelyDanMan   2 months ago   Friend   Ignore

Latex & Breastfeeding Concerns

Good morning, J I hope you are well. Returning customer, here. My kajira/wife and I are splinter Gor lifestylers (NOT KAOTIANS) [link] but are currently isolated due to our deviation from standard kajira beautification ideals and the arrival of our first child (girl - Gemma) two months ago. My wife’s submission has usually been expressed fashion-wise in various strict latex outfits, a few of which you have kindly provided us over the past couple of years. Naturally, the arrival of a mini-me results in some changes! My wife, insecure after birth, wants to return to strict full-coverage latex, but this desire is at odds with her physical situation of actively nursing Gemma and we both have worries. Does the constriction of latex effect or otherwise harm milk production, or could secondhand latex exposure harm our baby? I imagine you have catered to many lifestyle situations where this might be relevant so I thought I would ask. Thanks very much. LEO

Reply from DeMarco FetishWear    2 months ago    Friend    Ignore

Hi Leo. While I have catered to many lifestyles, I’m afraid I must exercise discretion in this situation, as it would be on par with giving medical advice. I will say any allergy is a possibility and one should exercise undue care with a very young infant, not just in matters of latex. I highly encourage you and your wife to discuss this with her doctor as frankly as possible. In the long run it might be worth reevaluating aspects of your wife’s submission and temporarily making do with latex pieces that do not restrict the breasts, while nursing is a part of her daily reality (I’m sure I don’t have to tell you examples are available on my page). Best of luck and congratulations on the new addition to your family.

  NoraBarnacle    2 months ago   Friend   Ignore

A sincere offer…

Several months ago, I bought a pair of latex gauntlet gloves from your shop. Since then, astonishing changes have come over me. I used to be high-powered, highly controlled, a formidable woman (natural ash blond, green eyes, 45”-40”-44”) I was determined to keep these feelings to myself, but I can no longer resist, as I wholeheartedly believe your Dominating spirit, imbued in the gauntlets, is leading me forcefully but masterfully into your care. If it pleases you, know I have not touched my aching slit for one month total as I am uncertain whether you desire me to feel pleasure that is not approved by you. There are no images of you on your site, but I have drawn an accurate picture of you in my mind and I know you are the Man that I never knew I was waiting for, the Man who will lead me, the Man who will hold my neck and strike my forehead to his knee in his insistence that I allow myself to be led. When I wear the gauntlets, they are your own gallant hands restricting my weak bones. I can no longer resist. I can no longer resist. I can no longer resist. I can no longer resist. I can no longer resist. I can no longer resist. I can no longer resist. I can no longer resist. I do not desire to resist. Please message back so I can properly present my acquiescence, body and soul, unto you. I squat disgracefully on my plump thighs, full of whorish tremor that makes me unworthy, but still I desire. I will service your home with my ardent hands and service your thick and striving cock with my wet tongue. Respond to this small soul. I submit to your gallant wisdom – A Secret Admirer

  RicoMetals   1 month ago   Friend   Ignore

Redhead Modle in Pic for Serve Her Serrated Corselette

Hey man-to-man who is she. I love redheads. Does she modle for other people/would she modle for my pieces? there’s no head in the pick – what’s her nose situation? we could all do collab and I think it would be hot. Let me kno - RICO

Reply from DeMarco FetishWear    1 month ago    Friend    Ignore

Hi Rico. I have not blocked you (yet) because said model wanted me to reply to you first and inform you, she’s already an established performer in her own right and does not want to model for a guy who “thinks I need some sissy seamstress to pimp me out to shitty welders online”. As I only have basic welding experience, I can offer no further comment or defense on your behalf.

  DerryBerry454   1 month ago   Friend   Ignore

Inquiry re: standard leather sleep-sack dimensions

Hello Miss J, quick question:

I will buy this item no hesitation no delay if you tell me right now about your vagina. Questions I prioritize:

1.     Color labia (outer)

2.     Color labia (inner – aroused)

3.     Clit length in centimeters or whatever measurement is most flattering to you

4.     Range of clit engorgement

5.     Depth of vaginal canal (I will allow ballpark figure as I know not everyone has graded speculums lying around)

6.     Percentage of clit orgasms v. vaginal orgasms – bonus points if you describe uterine orgasm, if that is your experience (no pressure to answer last part, as I understand it is not necessarily vagina-adjacent)

7.     Are you hairy? What color?

8.     When you wash your vagina do you douche or do you use fingers to rub through labia folds and that is it?

9.     Color of menstrual blood

10.  If you wear panties, do you find the crotch of your panties degrades due to PH of your vaginal discharge? (give me the qualities and I will calculate this for you)

While a picture of your vagina is welcome (and will only be for my private use) I really do like gathering these stats (I’m kind of a nerd) and would appreciate as much openness on your behalf as possible and you will benefit too because I’ll give you money for your lovely product. Talk to you soon! 😊

  B O A R D

[RUBBERVALLEY FIENDS THREAD 3/3 2006-PRESENT] TOPICS: 850 POSTS: 10,356

DungeonMaster (MOD 2): Hey people, we’ve reached the end of the summer and you know what that means – Ivan himself of the halls of Rubber Valley presents inaugural post of their annual sweeps week filming extravaganza – first photoset already up and we’ve got the goddamn brilliant LYDIA SUCKS sons! The greatest bitch on the face of the planet almost psyched us out but she’s here she’s low and she’s ready to blow. Vid upload will probably take till tomorrow to render but we’ve got some great pic galleries already. Ivan really spoiling us pigs lmfao. Seeing lots of setup and dress-up and behind scenes stuff for yall candid pervs. We’ve got full body latex and face coverage hoods and I see a breathing tube and the barn inversion setup. Possible inverted ceiling fuck? The boys can dream. Links to download pics results in PERMABAN – only official links to Rubber Valley site allowed, don’t know how often I have to say it. You want to pass ripped screenshots you do that through email *casts pearls before swine*

GOBgobGOB: no pic of lyds upside down yet ☹

LordJim: Not interested until I see Ivan haul out the FuckRacers from two years ago – wonder why he doesn’t bring those around more often? Great view stats on current vids and who doesn’t like a fat ass getting auto-fucked while she steers the go-cart supine?

SUCKPUNTER: lmfao all views are you bro

GOBgobGOB: D I R E C T H I T

SUCKPUNTER: hey lordjim where’d you learn the word supine

LordJim: Yeah “laugh out loud” very funny guys.

SUCKPUNTER: did you learn it at college

DungeonMaster (MOD 2): Lydia looks gr8 folks. Queen pristine and ready to cream. SUCKPUNTER – chill out because I’ve got my eye on you. Don’t take the bait Jim. You’re like thirty.

SUCKPUNTER: at least I don’t get off on bitches doing the pinewood derby

LockSTOCK2FUCKINGBARRELS: LYDIA!

GOBgobGOB: LYDIA!!!

McLovin: LYDIA LYDIA LYDIA

TheWorldofMartinAmis: Goddess. Wish she’d get her boobs done though.

LockSTOCK2FUCKINGBARRELS: same! I’ve been waiting for years for her to get into xtreme body mod. Right up her alley. If she’s at EXXXOTICA EXPO next year I’m going to try to get her meet and greet and ask. I know tattoo guys who’d pay HER to give her first tat.

McLovin: Lydia wouldn’t go. She’s like indie transgressive.

DungeonMaster (MOD 2): nice to see you again lockSTOCK. I see your POV but Lydia has several interviews where she says most of her viewers see her bod as a clean palate in the art of pain – as in, wounds have to go away in order for us to appreciate a fresh ruining ; ) tats and huge implants are a little tougher to work around. Anyway in my mind you can fix bad tits but you can’t fix bad attitude

ThatOneFootGuy: id suck her feet

McLovin: woah fuck 4th latex pic in dressing series with her mouth open and her eyes shut – who the lube guy with his arm right down her front?

SUCKPUNTER: lol hand clear to her pussy and hes not even hard faggot

McLovin: scope the ginger amazon in the background with camera – new girl? Don’t recognize. Didn’t know Ivan was bringing new people around this year’s sweeps.

LordJim: I wondered too when I saw. I’m sure DungeonMaster mod understands if I copy/paste following from Ivan (no pics, text w/actress info):

Newcomers are always welcome in RUBBER VALLEY (especially if they’re lovely, and especially if they’re ladies!) and this old goat is pleased to welcome DOMME LUX, our friendly neighbor down south in that little town called Chicago. Mysterious as she is alluring, you’ll see her shining light sampling tidbits of delight off our Valley Girls throughout the uploads this month (or even taking a crack at a couple!) We’re just getting to know her, but I have a feeling she’s a generous gal at heart as she kindly offered us the services of her Personal Valet, Jules DeMarco, who himself spoiled us all year with devious latex devices for our steadfast daring dollies after the unfortunate 2012 passing of our beloved torture designer Merrick Marvel (memoriam post 03/04/2012). Check out Jules’s Half-Bag Breast Mummifier in scheduled post 7/22 (Heather Bunny in the inverted Wench Wrench) the diabolical Arachnae-Hood (Lacey Jane, spinning in our trusty Landscape(her) Rolling Pin 7/16) and the Double-Fuck Full Body Boa Binder with eerie inflatable bubble hood (Lydia Sucks, finale post 7/31, don’t miss it, SUBSCRIBE). I must confess, we took advantage - the poor fella ran himself ragged helping us with film prep all week. So as an apology we let him get up close and personal with Rubber Valley’s reigning heroine LYDIA SUCKS fitting her in a custom four-limb black latex catsuit with half-face hood, made especially for her brave beautiful bod. He takes a good long time greasing her up before Ivan and Barry get her hoisted and joisted and in her best bitch-bat position among the rafters of the exalted Rubber Valley barn, where we leave her to squirm in terror! (but let’s get real – what scares Lydia? We’re wracking our brains!) Uh-oh, is Domme Lux looking jealous in the background? Is she plotting a little comeuppance for our Lovely Lady Lydia? Only one way to find out – SUBSCRIBE!

DungeonMaster (MOD 2): Np lordjim, if you hadn’t posted I was going to. Looks like we’ve got fresh meat in the valley.

TheWorldofMartinAmis: very pretty girl, but always bummed when a new one turns out to be top. Call me old fashioned, I come to the Valley for slaves.

SUCKPUNTER: firecrotch

GOBgobGOB: brb too busy crankin it. milky gingerbread titties come to daddy

McLovin: @TheWorldofMartinAmis, Ivan always has at least one femdom around. Room for everybody in the valley

LockSTOCK2FUCKINGBARRELS: holy shit I know that guy.

SUCKPUNTER: lmfao faggots know faggots

LockSTOCK2FUCKINGBARRELS: no for real. His real name is Jules Marinelli. I worked with him one summer lifeguarding beaches for the park’s district. Our boss found his website where he sells his sex stuff, and it was this whole big thing. Found the kink club Entrance through that (check it out if you’re in my hood ever – huge, clean, not too much gay shit, great ladies of all stripes hanging around, but limits on drinking if you’re trying to access certain levels). He’s bi. He’s either secretly Domme Lux’s slave or Domme Lux is his slave and it’s mega on the DL because it’d hurt her career if it got out she could ‘verse. There’s all this gossip.

SUCKPUNTER: bi guys r fags

DungeonMaster (MOD 2): SUCKPUNTER – that’s strike one. lockstock – not deleting your post because from what I can see JDM doesn’t/isn’t acting in explicit scenes, but let’s cool it with doxxing info. Looks like he’s had an experience with that before, and as a small business owner myself, I know how it can suck. We aren’t gossiping high school girls. Settle back and enjoy what Ivan gives us.

GOBgobGOB: *sees dudes in the chat and stops jacking off*

LockSTOCK2FUCKINGBARRELS: NP mod, feel free to delete it later before it causes problems.

TheWorldofMartinAmis: going back to previous discussion – don’t think a breast job automatically constitutes body modification

DungeonMaster (MOD 2): think about it martinamis, it’s a slippery slope – you want to see some swollen battered fish get destroyed, or a fresh natural girl get destroyed?

SUCKPUNTER: i am not a faggot and a whore’s a whore and im here to see whores fucking destroyed

GOBgobGOB: *tony soprano voice* she was a HOOOOER

SUCKPUNTER: fag or cunt all whores get fucked

LordJim: Mod, step up. This isn’t going to get better. With all due respect

SUCKPUNTER: fag or cunt ALL WHORES GET FUCKED

DungeonMaster (MOD 2): yeah, already done. That should be the last of him. Don’t know why I expected that situation to turn out differently.

  FROM: lydias-verified@terrorproductions.com

TO: JulesDM86@gmail.com

Subject: Debrief – valley week

Jules,

As discussed, attached is current info for my old webmaster service from when I had to run my own fansite. Decent price and decent vendor system. Can only be an improvement on what you have now. That is not an insult, but I know it sounds like one. Stay with me.

[link] [link] [link]

And above, the top three most trafficked boards I’ve found following my own career and the rubber valley gang. We’ve caused quite a stir already and its only July 15th. I wouldn’t count on this causing an uptick in your business, but I think you know that. The standard gentleman at home spending twenty bucks a month for guaranteed links to a woman being fucked inside out while wearing a sensory deprivation hood simply doesn’t translate him to spending 100-200 dollars, contacting a seller, taking measurements, and going through the effort to order he and his special girly the hood itself. But I know you believe you’ve chosen your life the same way I believe I’ve chosen my life and won’t whine. I will say, if your ego is bruised, that your clothes are wonderful. They feel maybe half like death. I’ll wear them again and again.

On a funnier note: I have accounts myself on all the above message boards and post semi-regularly. It might amuse you to do the same thing, but you need to be careful regarding your identity. Feedback from viewers is never relevant, but it needs to be pure (don’t ask me why – my brains are fucked out). I won’t tell you who I am, and you won’t tell me who you are. Maybe we’ll find each other.

I wouldn’t tell your Cathy, since some sensitive (if inaccurate) information is flying around. Your instinct towards privacy, while cute and old fashioned, is an apt instinct. Looks like the good people of Chicago can’t keep their fucking mouths shut. Will you be able to find a straight job if your work now goes up like a dead dog’s gut? Don’t despair. Your nice long cock dropped so well down my throat while your Cathy beat my clit with the edge of your belt (nice touch – whose idea was that?) so while you might not get another chance to perch in a lifeguard’s throne, you might very well have a future in film. You’re vigorous, discrete, disciplined, clean, and a cutie-pie. Have your Cathy make some films of you alone or you two together. It’ll excite her, so you have no choice but to be excited yourself. You’re excited reading this. You believe you chose this.

Anyway – Cathy! Don’t be insulted on her behalf. I loved playing with you both. She’s kind and a lot of fun, which are virtues I still let myself appreciate in others. Let her know I appreciate how she let me use you. She’s a good girl and has a good future in store, especially with her personal valet running her life. Pick her outfits, pick her makeup, pick her clients, pick her laundry soap – is it already like that? I want to be buried alive, but you want to be buried in chores. Please dream big, Jules.

Rubber valley is where I have the most fun out of all the shoots I have in a year, but I really was lucky that you two showed up. Poor old Merrick Marvel (not even that old – colon cancer). But out with him and in with you. I enjoyed our river talk and I felt very safe in the car with you at the wheel, though I know I tormented you a little (but I’m pretty sure Cathy helped you out later with that – will you write back to me what she did to you, and if she let you come?) At one point you were with Ivan in the garage, and I tried to have a little talk with her about oblivion, but she either understood my point and got scared, or simply didn’t understand. It’s unfortunate, kind of soul-sucking, how our dominant “loved ones” transform into necessary evils. Adjust the tube. Grasp the handle. Move the thigh. Use the vocal cord to form the order. But what do they know? I never knew how to explain.

I’ve attached some personal pictures of me. I like knowing that you have them. I won’t contact you again except under strict business purposes, so let me sum up. Serve Cathy well. Don’t let her get bullied. Flourish creatively. Keep that belt. Fuck as often as your body commands you to fuck (if I suspect that sometimes your body is Cathy’s body by proxy, then this number will double, perhaps triple, but the choice is out of your hands because she owns your cock). You have a lot of growing up to do. Don’t despair. More to come.

We won’t see each other soon, but we’ll see each other again. Ciao! 

I expect improvements.

XOXOXOXOXOXOX

Lydia S

[ghiblibat]

Thoughts on episode 24 in no particular order

1. I LOVED that circling shot as kazuma is confronting Kyo . UGh. The music, the acting, camera angles, the everything. You could really feel the tension in the air.

2. THE TRANSFORMATION SCENE bRUh it was so much more intense this time around. Absolutely phenomenal . The shot of Kyo’s head half transformation had me S H O O K. And seeing him cry as he screamed in pain broke my heart, man.

3. The character design for his true form was much better as well. I felt it looked much scarier . Also !orange ! eyes!

4. I feel like we saw a much more vulnerable Kyo this time . The way he was talking about how he couldn’t lose more people and how tired he was of all the pain Like oh my god. You can really feel just how broken,damaged and emotionally drained he is.

5. J E R R Y J E W E L. MY GUy my DUde. He did such an amazing job. Every line really packed a punch. I was really impressed. Laura also was just amazing!! 👌🏾❤️❤️❤️❤️

6. I love how strong tohru was this time. She wasn’t some damsel in distress. Yes she was scared, yes it was hard but our girl came through. She knew if she turned her back on him he wasn’t coming back and she was NOT having that. She was bringing her man back no mater what. Best part? No one had to encourage her. She did it on her own because she loves him and can’t imagine a life without him. She’s seen the good the bad the ugly but she still wanted to stay and she was determined.

7. The romantic subtext was STronG . Way more then the original anime. They are such OTP I CANNOT

8. Small detail but Idk I liked seeing kagura overhear the convo between shigure and kazuma. Also yuki’s smile when greeting kazuma. My rat son is so beautiful ;u;

9. Kagura closing the blinds 👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾 unlike the original it really gives us a glimpse into their relationships character arc. Sure she cares for him but Her intense Romantic love is fake. Unlike tohru kagura can’t stand to see him in his true form. She doesn’t want to face it.

10. Everyone stayed the fuck home!! This is Kyo and tohru’s moment stay away! 😂 although..listen I’m glad it didn’t happen cause it was NOT yuki’s place to be there. But I always low key really liked the “is that all we do? Run away? I don’t wanna do it anymore!” Line In the og. And just like Kyo thrashing Yuki around 😂

11. kazuma is such an A++ dad. I’m so happy Kyo through all the suffering he’s faced at least had a dad that loved and cared for him so much. Kyo would have been lost without him.

12. KYos little smile while he’s talking to kazuma in his room OMG BABY 😭

13. Kyo as a child 😭😭❤️❤️

14. The part were little Kyo was yelling at his bio dad was like so intense. Cause just think about it this is a 5/4 (?) year old at his own mother’s funeral yelling at his father he’s gonna kill another kid then kill himself so his dad will be happy like that’s ROUgH. And having everyone tell him his mom’s suicide was his fault, like that’s horrific for anyone but can you imagine the added suffering that has to cause a child?

15. The way they changed were the cats are kept. LIKE ITS A LITERAL CAGE IN A BASEMENT YA’LL. Bitch boy akito really wants to make our boy live his life in that thing. Can you imagine Kyo in that? Breaks my heart

16. THIS EPISODE this is the moment Kyo falls in love with tohru and my heart and soul can’t take it. How can you watch this episode and Not ship them? Loool ❤️❤️

17. HE JUST YEETED HER IN THE WATER??? Like I was shook 😂 lol I was watching the episode with my mom and we both just gasped and looked at Each other like oh my GOd I know he scratched her in the manga so I was prepared for that but that really took me by surprise.

18. THE CHANGE IN KYO’S VOICE IN HIS TRUE FORM? *CHEF KISS*

19. I think the only only thing I like a little more in the originally anime was the “She saw me, it’s all over now, there’s no hope” line. The way it was delivered in the og anime you could really feel the hopelessness he felt so much more. And having him desperately run instead of jumping through the trees feels more impactful as well. Also kind I find this shot looks a little weird? The anatomy a little wonky? Idk

20. You know when I first watched the episode I didn’t feel as impacted as I thought I was. It felt like so fast. However I think that because I watched the og episodes directly before it that messed with my judgment. After rewatching it like nah it hit hard. It’s done right and I love It

21. Like many of you Im a fruba veteran. I have waited 10 years to see this story done right. And The reboot certainly hasn’t let me down. I loved this episode. The bond tohru And Kyo share is so heart warming. I’m so happy to finally see this arc done right. I watched this series when I was 12 years old and now I’m 21 and I’m in love with it all over again. This is just the beginning I can’t wait to see the rest of the story.

[cupidmarwani-archive]

The Med Groupchat

Summary: The title speaks for itself.

WC: 1.5k

[crickett has renamed the chat “SEXY BITCHES”]

crickett: my city now

[Maggie<3 has renamed the chat “Gaffney ED”]

Maggie<3: Absolutely not

J. Lanik: Dr. Marcel, I can just kick you out of the chat if you cannot take this seriously.

crickett: rude

[J. Lanik has changed “crickett”’s username to “Crockett Marcel”]

[Crockett Marcel has changed “Crockett Marcel”’s username to “crickett”]

[crickett has added “HUBBY” to the chat]

HUBBY: Hi this is Ethan Crockett made my username and I don’t know how to change it

J. Lanik: I can change it in the chat for you I have admin privileges

crickett: no fun

HUBBY: Please change my username

[J. Lanik has changed “HUBBY”’s username to “Ethan Choi”]

crickett: how come u have all the power

J. Lanik: Because I’m an adult.

FreeWilly: who acts like a five year old lmao

J. Lanik: YOU KNEW I WAS SAVING THAT SORBET FOR FRIDAY NIGHT AS A TREAT FOR MYSELF

crickett: no need to yell

[crickett has sent an image to the chat]

FreeWilly: WHAT THE FUCK CROCKETT

J. Lanik: HOLY SHIT

[Maggie<3 has left the chat]

[crickett has deleted a message from the chat]

crickett: sorry babes i meant to send that to @EthanChoi

Ethan Choi: I’m breaking up with you

[J. Lanik has added “Maggie<3” to the chat]

Ethan Choi: You’re safe now, Maggie

Lesbian’s Wife: hey google how do i bleach my brain

Lesbian: Seconded

Maggie<3: Remind me which one of you is which

Lesbian: I’m Ava

FreeWilly: I remember cos Sarah never shuts up about being Ava’s wife

Lesbian’s Wife: I’m Ava’s wife <3

[J. Lanik has changed “Lesbian”’s username to “Bekker”]

[J. Lanik has changed “Lesbian’s Wife”’s username to “Other Bekker”]

crickett: not that i dont love and support dr bekker but this is the ed chat 

crickett: since u wont let me name it the sexy bitches chat

J. Lanik: She’s married to Sarah and cardiology is always down here.

J. Lanik: WAIT

[J. Lanik has added “connor” to the chat]

[J. Lanik has added “MommyPower” to the chat]

Maggie<3: I love you, Nat, but please change your username

crickett: give me admin power

[MommyPower has changed “MommyPower”’s username to “Nat”]

Nat: I’m in a mom chat leave me alone

Maggie<3: How’s Owen btw

crickett: @J.Lanik give me admin give me admin

Ethan Choi: do not give him admin I’m begging you

[J. Lanik has promoted “Ethan Choi” to administrator]

[Ethan Choi has changed “J. Lanik”’s username to “BooBoo the Fool”]

Nat: Owen is great thanks for asking! He just started soccer.

[Ethan Choi has removed “BooBoo the Fool” from the chat]

Ethan Choi: YOU FOOL

Ethan Choi: I HAVE ACCESS TO ETHAN’S PHONE

Ethan Choi: AND HE IS EASILY DISTRACTIBLE!

crickett: He locked himself in the bathroom with my phone. But now I have his

Ethan Choi: WAIT NO I HAVE PRIVATE STUFF THERE

Maggie<3: More private than your dick pics?

Connor: his WHAT

[Ethan Choi has added “BooBoo the Fool” to the chat.]

[BooBoo the Fool has changed “BooBoo the Fool”’s username to “Lanik”]

[Lanik has demoted “Ethan Choi” from administrator]

Lanik: This close to removing you from the chat, Marcel.

crickett: u love me too much

Bekker: Crockett sent us all his dick earlier @connor

crickett: NOT ON PURPOSE

connor: ...is it a good dick

crickett: i mean yeah? i hope so 

Ethan Choi: I’d like to stop talking about my husband’s dick please

Ethan Choi: (but for the record @connor it is a good dick)

Other Bekker: can we not talk abt his dick

Other Bekker: not unless i can talk about the strap but lanik said thats not allowed

Bekker: So he can send nudes but Sarah can’t talk about our new strap?

[Lanik has added “Dr. Charles” to the chat]

Lanik: Will this make you all calm down?

Dr. Charles: I don’t want to be involved here.

[Dr. Charles has left the chat]

Other Bekker: DAD

connor: lmao daddy issues

Bekker: @connor is this the hill you wanna die on?

[connor has deleted a message from the chat]

FreeWilly: can we all calm down lol

crickett: no. @connor dm if you wanna see my dick

Ethan Choi: …

crickett: i was kidding!!

crickett: haha unless……..

Lanik: Please do not plan threesomes in the work groupchat.

April: @Lanik bitter because you weren’t invited

crickett: OOOOOH burn

Ethan Choi: Does @no-ah have us on mute

April: yes

crickett: I’ll dm him some booty pics

Ethan Choi: Do not dm him booty pics

crickett: doing so is a public service

FreeWilly: to be fair Ethan he does get naked anywhere and everywhere

Nat: Including my birthday party >:(

crickett: in my defense u and april and sarah were also naked

Other Bekker: i remember that lmao

Lanik: This is a work chat.

FreeWilly: we should have a nude exchange

[Lanik has removed “FreeWilly” from the chat]

crickett: ooooh drama. are yall gonna break up

[Lanik has muted “crickett”]

Maggie<3: It’s so… quiet

Ethan Choi: Please unmute him he’s whiny

[Lanik has unmuted “crickett”]

connor: anyways 

connor: who wants to talk about their trauma

Bekker: @connor Like when you accused me of murder

Other Bekker: when i was a kid my mom really hated me and ive never really felt loved and maybe thats why im in a constant state of loneliness and being unfulfilled and even though im the happiest ive ever been i constantly feel like im on the edge of a cliff and at any moment im gonna fall over the edge and die

connor: that was loaded

Other Bekker: you asked

Maggie<3: I was traumatized by seeing Crockett’s penis

connor: lucky :(

Lanik: Jeez kids can you lighten up a little

Nat: HE KNOWS MEMES HE KNOWS MEMES

crickett: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING THIS JIMOTHY

Lanik: Don’t call me Jimothy.

Ethan Choi: @connor why are you thirsty

[Lanik has added “FreeWilly” to the chat]

Lanik: It’s worse without you

FreeWilly: that may be the nicest thing youve ever said to me…

crickett: hey baby

crickett: baby

crickett: baby

crickett: baby

Nat: Use dm

crickett: baby

crickett: baby

Ethan Choi: What

crickett: since ur going to the hospital tonight can u pick up my meds uwu <3

Ethan Choi: Only if you promise to never say uwu again

[Other Bekker has renamed the chat “uwu”]

Nat: uwu

connor: uwu

Other Bekker: uwu

Bekker: uwu

April: uwu

Maggie<3: uwu

FreeWilly: uwu

Crickett: OWO

Ethan Choi: I want a divorce

[Lanik has renamed the chat “SHUT THE FUCK UP MARCEL”]

connor: lanik snapped

FreeWilly: hot

connor: WAIT CROCKETT DID YOU DO THAT ON PURPOSE

crickett: ;)

Bekker: What did he do

connor: i saw the dick pick. @EthanChoi you were right its nice

Lanik: Please stop planning threesomes in the chat

Ethan Choi: @connor I’ll set up a private chat

connor: yesyesyesyesyes

Nat: I wish I could get laid this easily…

April: You can

Maggie<3: I’m with @Lanik can you guys not be horny in this chat

Other Bekker: my two modes are horny and depressed

Bekker: Actually you have a third- hungry

Other Bekker: fair

No-ah: This is why I have the chat muted

[No-ah has left the chat]

[Lanik has added “Queen Elsa” to the chat]

Bekker: Rounding out the lesbianism I see

Queen Elsa: Is this even a chat I want to be in?

Ethan Choi: No

Maggie<3: No

crickett: yes

Other Bekker: to summarize: crockett sent a dickpic on accident and connor was disappointed he didnt see it and now hes gonna sleep with ethan and crockett and also i think nat and april are gonna get laid and also in case you didnt know yet will and jimmy are dating

Other Bekker: AND @Bekker IS MY WIFE!

Maggie<3: There it is

Lanik: Hi, Ms. Curry. This is the groupchat for the ED and I trust that you’ll treat this respectfully unlike some of the other doctors have been

Queen Elsa: Did you just call me a doctor?

crickett: do not listen to him this chat is all fun and games and dickpics

Queen Elsa: If that last part is true, I’m leaving the chat.

crickett: it only happened once and it was an accident

[Other Bekker has sent an image]

Other Bekker: look at my wife look at my wife look at my wife

FreeWilly: @April @Nat are you guys still here

Maggie<3: It looks like they both have us on mute

crickett: good for them,, we been knew they were in love

Ethan Choi: Please act like a person

crickett: bold of u to assume im a person

[connor has renamed the chat “tinder for lonely gay doctors and nurses”]

Other Bekker: DOES THIS MEAN WE CAN HELP ELSA GET A GIRLFRIEND

Queen Elsa: I have one.

Other Bekker: omg omg omg spill

Lanik: I feel like none of you are taking this seriously.

[Lanik has promoted “Maggie<3” to administrator]

Lanik: Never let it be said that I did not try.

[Maggie<3 has changed “Lanik”’s username to”BooBoo the Fool”]

[BooBoo the Fool has left the chat]

[vaguely-concerned]

I’m back! Temeraire Let’s Read:Tongues of Serpents

- Tharkay literally shows up at the beginning of the second sentence; STRONG start, I highly approve, great improvement on every level

fsdafhsadkjlfh cooly tossing tables and throwing people’s drinks in their faces in the bar brawl fkjsdhfksdalfhasdj this ain’t his first rodeo huh

- these dumbasses having to clean up from the bar brawl before going home so their dragons don’t go out there and demand to have a word with the dudes who bullied their lil boys... oh my  g o d 

- “it was true, if one wished to be very particular about such things, that laurence was a convicted felon”  t e m e r a i r e... ~*technicality schmechnicality*~ it was barely treason at all really  

also temeraire being in super protective mother hen/older brother mode over the eggs is perfect  

- Jane Rolands bluff, jovial letter writing is Everything

- “Have Temeraire throw him overboard,” Tharkay had suggested laconically, when Laurence had escaped to his quarters for a little relief and some piquet . . . “He can fish him out again later,” he added, as an afterthought.

A VISIONARY. An unmitigated joy. “Have Temeraire throw him overboard”. He says what we’re all thinking. 

- AAAAAAAAH MUTUAL FIRST NAME BASIS!!!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL WTF HAVE THEY BEEN DOING ON THIS TRIP TELL ME IN DETAIL WHEN THE SWITCH HAPPENED PLEASE (also I really like that the first instance we see is “But Tenzing, I cannot trust myself” b/c that was literally the whole point of that scene in VoE. laurence... yes you can. tfw your crush is the goodiest of twoshoes and can barely move for it and doesn’t even knoooow)

- y’know if Laurence could get over this thought that asking a direct question to a friend is just ~*intolerably rude*~ he could get so much shit done 

(I guess tharkay, clearly a follower of the rosa diaz school of ‘no one is ever going to know shit about me’, is like fuck yeah I’ve struck gold with this one)

- “So spake the pot” oh I do love Actually Pretty Chill Dad William Laurence finally letting the snark out more frequently, it suits him very much (I guess his main claims to fame in a lot of circles is a) treason and b) spoiling his dragon rotten)

- rankin’s name is mentioned and everyone’s like HIIISSSSSSSS and RIGHTLY SO FUCK THAT GUY JUSTICE FOR LEVITAS

- temeraire is talking to the egg about consent and saying he’ll make sure it won’t have to do anything it doesn’t want to fjklsadhfkaslhfsd my heart

- lol lol lol weeeell in hindsight who could’ve guessed captain and second in command of the dragon pirates would have a materialistic superficial kid huh

- . . . Granby said, with a look half affection and half exasperation oh granby baby still carrying that torch huh

- lol lol lol just the implication of sara maden and laurence silently tops up his drink and he’s like ‘cheers’ and they’re both quiet for a moment flskdfs 

if you think about it that must’ve been such a wild day in his life tho -- like first  Laurence furiously fires him for being gone at a crucial moment and then immediately unfires him when it turns out he’s been chasing a lead and being the only goddamn person really working on solving all their problems (as is his wont), then he finds out his ex is getting married and steadfastly pretends it doesn’t even bother him, lol what are feelings I heard only losers have them (extremely relatable -- I guess he must have known it was in the cards though, because he specifically tells Laurence at the beginning he didn’t intend to go back to Istanbul, so it’s been over for a while?) then they go on a life and death chase through the sewers, and THEN, before he knows it, after half a book of being kind of a mistrustful dick to him, Laurence does a 180° and is there offering eternal friendship with big soulful eyes after seeing him get upset one time and y’know I guess I see why that got to him lol 

- aw man I know it’s never going to happen but I am getting sort of wistful and teary-eyed over this pirate (cough cough I mean legally sanctioned privateer of course) AU that’s going entirely to waste

here are some tags I left on this superb piece of fanart: #I just got to the part where tharkay makes the suggestion and like... I know it's not happening #but what a shimmering tender mother of pearl dream to carry in one's heart lol #just a lil pirate family out there wrecking shit #temeraire would get wind of what the east india company actually does and they'd inevitably turn against them and fuck 'em up... *sigh* #fix it fic: the boys kiss and the east india company is stopped from committing further atrocities! all is well

so that’s basically my position on that

- “I’m sure there’s nothing too dangerous out there, in the fucking untamed Australian wilderness,” Temeraire said, tempting fate to a frankly anxiety-inducing extent 

- hell yeah demane is the only one with presence of mind to actually find some food; you go buddy <3

- my boy tharkay slinking off in the middle of the night without telling anyone and solving everyone’s problems... *dabs at eyes* just like old times

- oh wow rankin really is just a piece of shit in every way huh

- fhasdklhfsadfsad temeraire being like ‘I know tharkay is a strong independent human who is perfectly capable of making his own decisions and don’t need no dragon... but also he’s clearly one of my humans tho why is he riding on another dragon :(’ THE CUTEST SHIT

- temeraire silently dissing his dad over refusing to believe in ghosts ~*except*~ for the holy spirit adslfhaskjdlhfs

- demane taking in the strange little hatchling... im crey... he truly hits me straight in the heart every time

also laurence steadfastly Doing The Right Thing and following his convictions is so deeply healing after all that bullshit he went through in the last book... makes me feel all safe and calm inside haha

- actually when you think about it it’s so fucked up that they apparently just straight up murder dragons with birth defects in england as a matter of course b/c like. dragons come out of the egg fully sentient and capable of understanding what’s being said around them. kulingile literally understood every word they were saying as they discussed whether or not they should be KILLING HIM.  j e s u s  thank god for demane and laurence’s stubborn insistence on being good

- temeraire going straight from mother hen to extremely impatient and jealous older brother the moment an egg hatches never gets old. all these dumb little babies just complaining and stealing his crew ugh (HOW FUCKING CUTE is him deciding kulingile could be a scholar or something tho #dragon rights)

- “I wish,” Temeraire said to Laurence, “I do wish that other dragons were not always thinking me peculiar . . . it makes one doubtful.” BABY BOY NOOOO he’s just so sweet and he’s so secretly scared that laurence might resent him a little after the whole treason business and OW right in the parental heart that fucks me up

- Temeraire’s indignant “Oh!”s always soothe my soul it’s so adorable

- little emily roland yelling “damn you all for cowards!” after a bunch of grown men fleeing while she reloads her gun and takes aim again is incredible poetic cinema (and also demane joining her... I love the bond they’ve got going on in the background here)

- aw poor sipho :( at least he still has temeraire to nerd out with and stuff but that’s some difficult shit to process for a kid

kulingile bobbing around tethered to temeraire like a small balloon at a fair is such an image, what a blessing, temeraire’s exasperated brand of babysitting is so funny

- laurence being a Dad to the kids in his crew... mana from heaven

- YESSS they crossed the endless miles of DEADLY AUSTRALIAN WILDERNESS so laurence could be MORTIFIED as the emperor’s adopted son at a party this is the content I am here for

- hell yeah let’s play a round of pimp my captain!!!!!!!!!!

“And,” Laurence said. “And you are certain that this should be appropriate for the occasion; not, perhaps, excessive?” I can’t  b r e a t h e  he can’t even say shit because his dragon boi is so happy fsaldfjsldhfasjlh and then granby making fond fun of him what a beautiful cherry on top of this sweet sweet laurence being embarrassed sundae 

- william ‘I’m here to kick ass and describe menswear in fastidious detail and I’ve already kicked my own ass twice today’ laurence strikes again

- this description of the dragons sitting around squabbling as they watch shiny sparkly things is the most endearing few pages in modern literature do not @ me

- it’s kind of fucked up that the emperor of china is giving laurence more of the sort of warmth and validation a father should than his actual dad ever did lol. u did good curing the dragon plague, weird european adopted son I am proud of you

- every time temeraire is really upset about something my soul suffers a small wound

thank god he doesn’t actually know what opium is really used for most of the time yet (also I am obligated to divulge that I am entirely charmed by tharkay’s sardonic yet clear eyed cynicism on the issue, I cannot be anything but what I am and he hasn’t had enough proper page time in this half of the book so I will take what I can get)  

- ...I kind of just realized that I imagine the sea serpents basically as long-ass gyaradoses... OH NO

I will say I respect the ‘give no fucks’ vibe they give off -- it’s a real ‘we’re here to eat fish & party and if you try to get in our way we’re gonna have you as a snack’ mood and I cannot fault them for it

- iskierka is such a fuckboi it’s glorious 

- nOOOOOO tharkay is leaving again fuck ;_______; is his life just an endless procession of semi-unwillingly having to go back to istanbul again these days 

Temeraire did not see why Tharkay should have to go so far, only to deliver news; and particularly when he did not seem as though he wished to go, very much. DDDDDDDD: THIS SUCKS you know that when a) he’s letting it show and b) temeraire notices it that he is dragging his heels big time over this lol

‘there can be very little to call you back to this part of the world any time soon’ LAURENCE YOU 24 KARAT IDIOT YOU ARE HERE HE CAME TO AUSTRALIA FOR YOU ALREADY WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS

all that said whenever I see a ‘Tenzing’ on the page my heart does a happy little dance. ah well now let’s settle in and wait for what horrible catastrophe will happen now that tharkay is gone... come back soon buddy

- ooooooooooooh that is so good, using the last chapter + epilogue to show how the... idk moral wound I guess laurence received victory of eagles has finally healed, that’s so reassuring. he just wants to do good things for good causes and can’t be badgered, cajoled, threatened or convinced to do anything less anymore and it’s all so sweet and well earned. that’s some good development through this book too, from ‘tenzing I cannot trust myself’ to this. excellent stuff

- while I did quite enjoy this book for the character moments it is incredibly weirdly structured? like the beginning drags a bit with the quite uninteresting colony politics and stuff but then they’re finally travelling and then... nothing really happens plot wise before the sea serpents freak the fuck out at the end there lol. I’m mostly a character-oriented reader tho so I’m pretty fine with it.

ETA: actually now that I think about it I’d say that my biggest gripe with this book is that it doesn’t engage at all with the perspective of the native australian people? even though one of the dragons settles down with one group? god knows it’s not like there was no time to dive into it, considering all that time spent in the fucking wilderness lol

we’re going to the inca empire next tho apparently fuck YEAH!!! that’s such an underexplored and extremely interesting part of history, my body is Ready

[kellinquinnaf]

A bi girls story

As a teenybopper I remember fantasizing about boys and coming up with senarios in my head. One day it was randomly a girl in my thoughts.

In summer 2015 I kissed a girl “A” (my bestfriend at the time) idk why part of me just really wanted to and she kissed me back, a boy saw (an ex it’s a small town) and was SHOCKED but we played it off. Later the “A” and I are home alone and I totally kissed her, pushed her up against the wall and everything. She was my first make out too. Throughout the summer we would have sleepovers and make out and it got as far as being shirtless and grinding (and I came wtf??) The whole time we would ask eachother if we’re straight or not and I was so like mind boggled that I was like “im straight, and we’re just friends who kiss” looking back now we were totally girlfriends that summer.

After that summer I was at a sleep over (in the city now) with my straight best friend “B” (100%) and another girl “S” and we were all friends. For some reason we started giving eachother hickeys and my straight bff “B” thought it was hilarious but I was like so into giving “S” hickeys that after I got sooooo nervous. We were all laying in her big bed together and my bff “B” fell asleep and I was so nervous that I kept shaking uncontrollably and she kept asking why. We were cuddling and so close and I can’t remember what I said but I think I told her I wanted to kiss her and we did and it’s was so amazing. Then weeks later we all had another sleep over and I was more confident this time and I kissed her and she kissed me back but out of no where “S” got up and was all nervous and I was sad that it ended but scared that she was not happy about something. After that she moved schools and I heard from my bff “B” that she felt really awkward about it all. Then she’d start posting about her “gf” (it was supposed to be platonic to the rest of the world) but as she posted pics or vids of them kissing I knew it was real for one of them at least.

In grade 11 a new girl came into the school, she was short and had the best but ever.. I couldn’t help but look. We ended up snapping and FaceTiming a few times and she wanted me to sleep over and she talked about us doing shit. She had a boyfriend at the time and he said he was ok with her experimenting. I was so excited to go over, and she started snapping me her in the bath and then her tits but she started snapping me just her vagina and I was not ready for that. The sleepover never happened :/. Yearssss later I’m in the city at the club and she’s there. I dance with her can call her hot and she says something like it’s been a while. We part ways.

I had a few boyfriends / flings in between then and finally made out with some boys and it was all really amazing too! The next summer I didn’t want to go back to the small town cause I had met this guy “D”! But I went back anyways.

I got a boyfriend in this town in summer 2016 and we told eachother we loved one another a few weeks into dating. During this summer I had a little fling with a girl “J” who at the same time was dating my ex-crush of 3 years who his letter is “V”. We tried kissing in front of both our boys they were just like wtf ok.

My boyfriend and I went long distance for a year while I went back to the city for school. During this time I went to a party with a bunch of people from my grade and idk why but I started talking to this girl “H” and straight up asked her (while drunk) if she ever thought about being with girls and she admitted yes and I kissed her. People saw and she got awkward about it. Another friend who saw got awkward around me after too. Another friend knew I’ve kissed other girls and I told her I was thinking about this party girl “H” and she told me that “H” felt weird about it after it happened. I let it go. During this time I also kissed a boy “J” at a party. And more girls at a different party (including my straight best friend “B” while she was drunk. I convinced her to kiss me I just wanted to see how she kissed lol). When prom came boy “J” had a girlfriend and we saw eachother at prom with our dates (“J” knew at the time that I had a boyfriend when I kissed him at the party) he just said hey Sam and looked at me with side eye but flirtation??? I said hey back .. my boyfriend knew that was the guy.

Fast forward a year and I moved in with my boyfriend in the small town. We were completely in love until we moved in together. Things get hard when you graduate high school and move 15 hours away with your boyfriend the day after. I cheated on him with a man “K” a year later and again 6 months after that, with “D” from years after he and I were a thing.

During the second time I was back in the city at the club dancing with the cheat “D” and my bffs sister “K” (guy “D” had a huge crush on girl “K” for the longest time). I’m between them both, my front grinding this girls ass and my ass grinding on this guy. This is the moment I felt true complete bliss and I knew then in that exact moment that I was bisexual. I then admitted it to my bestfriend “B” days later, the first person I told out loud and she said “I’ve known that since girl “S” in grade 10” (at this point we’re on our second year out of high school) Guess I must be obvious.

This guy “D” though he accepted my bisexuality in the moment and made me feel empowered and turned on by it. He was turned on by it. It just felt so good to be with someone so open. Actually I had another boy “C” who felt the same and it felt so good to me for them to enjoy me just being bisexual me. (Funny story this boy “C” dated the girl I had kissed in the sleepovers “S” and so I told him about how we kissed the same girl and he was so horny over it ahhh!)

Bring us to one month ago and (6months after that last cheat with “D”) and I go to another party in the small town now. I’m fucking plastered but I somehow scavenge out the lesbian from the pack of girls who is “M” 😍. We start talking and I guess I’m totally attracted to her. I think I kissed her without her wanting it at first. I kissed her a lot that night. Everyone saw too. We walked home with everyone and I held her hand the whole way. We added eachother on snap.

I told my boyfriend long ago that I’m bisexual and he told me I’m not. I tell him again and he says we could have a three sum. After kissing “M” I got weird cause he considers it cheating and I felt horrible for doing it again. I told him and my boyfriend said “I’m sorry but Im not into that. I know some guys are but I’m not” I told him my fantasy of having us be in a three way relationships with a girl. He could have two girls to fuck and I could have the best of Both worlds. He could get us both pregnant and our kids would be siblings. He was not intrigued by this idea at all.

“M” and I want to hang out but now I feel like I can’t hang out with her cause I know I won’t be able to control myself. She came into my work the other day for a dental appointment. She walks in wearing all black, her blonde hair shimmering in the light contrasting to the black. She has a big leather jacket and a helmet in hand, wearing big black boots. Her colourful tattoos showing on her arms making her look so tough but artistic. We get to chatting as I show her to her exam room. She forgot that I worked there and I commented on the fact that she rides a motorcycle. A Honda 500 (can’t remember the model) - I tell her I’ve always wanted to ride but my parents never let me. I’m leaning on the counter trying to look chill and cool. She said riding a bike is the gayest thing to do (I thought she meant like “gay insult” but she meant “gay homosexual”). I bet the whole office could hear the flirtation and I only hope that they think it’s just banter. She’s getting ready to leave now so I pretend to busy myself with paper work at the front so I can watch her leave. As she’s leaving I walk to the back and turn over my sholder, us making eye contact and waving to eachother. I watch her ride her motorcycle with one hand after saying she just started riding and is getting used to it. She looked like a dream.

I snap her the next day asking how the work day is since I of course work days and she works nights. She replys with something calling me cutie and sending heart eye emojis. We flirt a bit more and she says she wants to hangout soon since she’s leaving for college again. I leave for vacation so I tell her aug 25th and 26th I’m back and can hang out. She said she leaves the 27th but can chill the 26th. I ask her what she wants to do (idk if she knows I have a boyfriend but I have to tell her). She says “I don’t think we’ll be bored😉”

Now I’m day dreaming about her and I have a boyfriend. I don’t know what I should do but I now know that the term “once a cheater always a cheater” is true. I know my desires will win. But can you really blame a Gemini; we are so torn between being two people and leading two different lives that we are greedy and take as much as we can of everything.

I also have a crush on my boss, a smart, intelligent, artistic and wholesome girl dentist, who is also a Gemini and born a decade and two days before me. This life is a struggle.

—

I’ve been thinking lately of talking to a therapist. My life is fucked up. I’m so torn between where I am and where I want to be. I don’t even know where I want to be .. I thought right where I am was it but I’m not so sure. I want to leave this town and go back to the city and go to school but I’m living the life I wanted here. I just don’t want this settled down family life just yet. I’m dental assisting without having gone to school for it so I feel like I can’t be proud of what I do. I’m a dance instructor with someone I can’t even handle anymore because of their greed and want to have my own control over it. I’m torn between wanting to be in a relationship and wanting to be single. Between wanting to be with a boy and with a girl. I miss my family but I moved here to get away from that toxic household (not toxic when not living with the parents). I have not been officially diagnose but I know I have OCD and trichotilomania (a disorder causing you to involuntary pull out your body hair). I only pulled my eyelashes but when I tried to stop I just started picking my skin and now I have the worst acne and scaring. I need help. My house is either spotless or a complete disaster. also I’m in the closet for most of everything and I’m nervous to what my family and coworkers will think/feel. Everyone else idgaf but when you’re so close and personal and you come out it shocks people and then the women don’t want to get to close to you in fear that you’re attracted to them. And the parents would be ok with it but they’d just be shocked.

I’m gunna ask the girl to hang out tonight and we’ll probably make out. Hopefully we fuck.

#horrible person

[ain-t-bovvered]

14x10 Commentary

Zeta and Giuls scream together, and then die.

Me & Zeta will watch together season 14′s episodes as they come out and we’ll do our commentary while watching.

1 2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9

14x10 Nihilism 

-I did not want to see Jack like that again thanks

Zeta: true

- And there was a need for some wings there honestly .

[ comes back crawling]

HERE

Zeta:  the bar sceeeene

-.....THAT’S A DAMN SQUIRREL WITH A AVIATOR CAP ON ( also I re wrote squirrel four times before getting it right) 

- MOOSE!!! 

-......The Moose has a tag with “FAMILY BUSINESS” written on it----lol Jensen

Zeta: What’s her name

- PAMELAAAAAAAA . Damn woman I went a bit Bi there

Zeta: OH YES.

- [Music: and I’m searching for a rainbow] .....WOW

-[on the counter] Daphne loves Fred.

 my monkey dirty brain: Daddy loves tips. 

-hot. want that.

Zeta: the tequila or the bartender?

Bitch please . both.

- D: “ What are we, savages?”

Zeta: Oh the lips

-Cosmic Cowboy. *chokes*

-FB

-why is it always a ghoul case?

-Lol but who’s the drunk guy tho

Zeta: Bitch, look at her biceps

- some Bi slippage there too I see. FOCUS

Zeta: also indeed. Who is he?

-D:”I’ve never had anything this nice”

Also....I would be like Dean if I had a bar. One for the costumer and one for me! woohoo .

- D: “How come you always have a boyfriend?”

  P: “How come you always want what you can’t have?”

[looks into the camera like in the office]

- D: “This is my dream” 

I kinda see it tho....old grumpy Dean Winchester being the Bobby while running a bar like that. Yes....I like it.

- I knew it . I wanna see someone closed behind that “closet” *wink wink*

Zeta: Oh oh

Zeta: the slo mo.

-NICE .You are welcome for this gif where I let you enjoy the full over the count jump. Nice healthy middle age man over the fence jump ( nevermind this is an italian oil ad ).

-The blood. So cute

Zeta: I’m famous

- mmm

Zeta: shit

-Hello M boi, I missed you fam

Zeta: Changed clothes

- OMFG are you saying that the Archangel Michael macVanity von DramaQueen really just angel mojo changed into his Peaky Blinder wanna be in front of them?

He’s so flamboyant , I love him .

Zeta: The close up

- M making three men kneel with so much as lift his hands.  WHAT A MOOD. WHERE CAN I GET THAT? I WANT 10.

- M : “ I saw everything”  Yeah no shit we kinda see that coming too

-DoN ‘T IntERrUPt mE 

Zeta: Don’t interrupt me

-I’m-

I’m so bothered right now. Dom Michael for the win

-OH WOW

- Sam just “assbutted” Michael lol.

Castiel : Sam....did you just molotov my brother with holy fire?

Sam: uh ....No?

- HE ANGRY

- Dean’s not home right now...

Zeta: Please leave a message

*giggling* I love him

Zeta: His voice GOD DAMN

-yes

- Castiel hair tho.

Zeta: Do you? Cocky much

-but needs to play it cool. Can’t risk to mess up the pomaded hair.

- S:” We the angel cuffs on , Michael is under control”

 M: “Keep telling yourself that “  ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

I *clap* LOVE *clap* HIM *clap*

- S: “Dump him in the trunk of the Impala” ... DUMP HIM .ahahahahaah

-Garth is in the trunk

Zeta: it’s a big trunk

-M: “ It’s a party!”

- J: “ It’s not like any of us can fly”

 M : “ Well one of us can”

 S: “ STFU”

- J:” Sam, are we gonna die here?” ... wow Jack...babe...stfu

-Yes OMG I forgot about the stalky reaper

Zeta: You mess up so many things

- it ain’t wrong

- [in john Mulaney’s Trump voice] we locked Death away and enslaved the reapers

Zeta: Poor Cas

- ok but WHO....death? Michael is asking himself that too.

-Yes , put him in the dungeon. HOT

Zeta: shit

-I can hear you

Zeta: Shit

-Ahahahahahaahah

Zeta: SHIT

-I’m loving this

Zeta: Bring back Crowley.

Zeta: We left Garth in the trunk looool

- that....everytime we don’t see a character for long that’s it...they are in the trunk.

Zeta: Castiel

-CASTIEL . so strange, I love him, he’s such a sarcastic asshole.

- M: “Yes, uh, put a chair against the door”

Zeta: This pretty smile as I rip you apart

-I’M SHAKING. YAS.

Zeta: Control yourself

- S: “Cass this is all we’ve got”

Zeta: Again?

- well it is a loop.

-MORE SHOTS.  (me)

Zeta: The only thing missing is “heat of the moment”

- what if the woman is his conscience trying to get him out and if he sign he’s out? ...like....testing his resolution?

-Little insulting

Zeta: you’re nothing

Zeta: Why is he so perfect in this?

- J: “Dean---is strong”

  M *disgusted face*: “ Is a gnat “ . WOW

-OH SHUT UP OOOOH

Zeta: Emotional abuse.

- M: “ he was not happy, but he didn’t care-- Cause you are not Sam, you are not Cass.” 

[ me looking smiling to the Castiel/Misha hateclub]

-M: “You are a weak helpless thing”

- Jack , babe ....get away tho 

Zeta: LISTEN TO YOUR DAD

- M: “no I’m not and I can still hear you”

Zeta: Prick

- Love that prick..... literally 

- I care so little for the others I swear

- M: “Look at you, play nursemaind for a nephilim”

-C: “You are confusing loyalty and compassion for weakness”

Zeta: Damn what am I watching?

- [looks into the camera like in the office] Sexual tension

Zeta: so done. this. Close up

- M “and now...that I’m in here, I know why” 

-CHUCK

Zeta: He churn our draft after draft

- M speaks like he’s singing and mocking you at the same time. He has this musicality in his speak and I love it

- C: “Why would he do that?”

 M: “BECAUSE HE DOESN’T CARE!”

- good lord I swear all the angels are just brats throwing temper tantrum because they have a trash dad.

- M: “But now , I just want to burn every one of his little worlds until I catch up to the Old man”

Zeta: Even god can die.

- oh ok....overachiever much

Zeta: Hurt Jack

- No no Jack babe...keep your fucking soul .

Zeta: Cool science project

- Michael’s mind: if you mess up my perfectly combed hair Cass I swear-

- M: “ I give it a solid B- .....uh oooh”

 me nervously: .....wtf lol 

- M: *snorts* Oh Cass, I believe in you.

So rude...so nasty 

- j: “ What should I do?”

Zeta: Pray

-Thanks Cas, that’s-......that’s great

Zeta: You are all mine

- ..... YESSIR TAKE ME

Zeta: Dean’s mind.

- ..... if it was a funny episode they could have made so many jokes about being empty lol.

- me looking around haters mind ^

Zeta: This is what you are gonna become

-omg

- THAT WAS DEAN IN HELL.

- Dean’ “NOOOO “ at Castiel death is vibrating into my bones.

- S: “Dean is strong”

- C: “Sam, we’ve been through a lot and Dean is more than strong”

- S: “Dean thrive on trauma.” 

WE’VE BEEN KNEW

Zeta: Smart moose

- Somebody has been reading some meta tumblr posts

- P: “You really know how to talk to a lady don’t you?”

 me already at Castiel’s feet : wha

- That’s us fans watching 14 seasons of supernatural ^

-Bloody Cass is 100. *licks lips*

- P: “get me a shot. With your braaaain”

Zeta: Well hello.

- C:” That was- that....DeAN ThAt WaS An ACcidENT”

Zeta: Babyyyy

- them baby faces

- C:” WE NEED YOU TO COME BACK”

- S:”POUGHKEEPSIE”

- Dean’s mind : [ old modem sounds]

-M [Slow clap it out.] : Hey Fellas

-AND THE HAT IS BACK

Zeta: I’m you

Zeta: He gripped you tight and raised you from perdition

-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAH I’M DYING SO BAD.

-BITCH I’M DEAD AND GIGGLING I CAN’T.

-but also....but the fuck is Mary at?... like wow.

- also....everything that Micheal is saying right now is causing me actual fucking pain.

- Ok and both Sam and Cas faces? well thanks

Zeta: He’s buying time

-WOW. Slow smile, oooooH

-S: “So in here, you are all talk”

- oh that’s why he doesn’t use his powers. Serviceable .

Zeta: So happy. Fuck

Zeta: Prove it

- Um...yes hello 911? 

Michael getting his hands dirty is too hot for me.

-Fucking Tiger man.

-Come on baby 

Zeta: Jack will do something “stupid”

- Well he is his parents’ son *shrug*

Zeta: that

- D:” Then we don’t kick him out, we keep him in”

-oooooh M goes in the closet, lol

Zeta: Oh my god.

- ....Well that was stupid AHAHAHAAH 

- I can’t stop laughing .

- M [ROAR] 

  me: ....

Zeta: I’m the cage.

-HE IS THE CAGE. That doesn’t seem right tho...come on.

Zeta: So now Dean has Michael locked up

-ooooh the magic hurt him. Forgot about that. My baby.

Zeta: Concerned Dad.

- The way Cass say : “you understand?” killed me....so soft...so worried...

- The little smile! Kill me now.

Zeta: He’s not ok.

-Dean is not ok.

Zeta: [henley alert]

-He’s like....naked. ( still has another tshirt under it tho)

-Oh he’s mad 

- I’M CRYING . HE LOOKS LIKE MY CAT WHEN I REFUSE TO LET HIM OUT .

amazing.

( Sorry for the not that clear gifs but I wanted to cut and past all the bits of that because it’s amazing)

Zeta: He’s suffering so much.

-That troat

- That door is not that sturdy tho

Zeta: Oh hell no

- oh hello death . 

-Aw hell naw.

- Death :” Except one”

-AW HELL NAW

Zeta: Which one?

- UGH

Zeta: No

-NO

Zeta: NOOO so much hurt

-OH FUCK

Zeta: Actual literal pain in my chest

YA KNOW WHAT?....I DON’T LIKE THAT LOOK .

NOT ONE BIT.

.

- lol I don’t even wanna look at tumblr now

Zeta: well you know me....I have

- of course you did

post gifs comment: I didn’t do my crack gifs for now, but they will be done in a separate post.

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If you want to get tagged in the future ones send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

TAGS: @supernatural-teamfreewillpage  @destiel-honeypie   @mariekoukie6661   @dragontamerm    @closetspngirl @rainflowermoon @mattiecat   @bunnybaby121115  @aliaitee @jacks-word-of-the-day @4evamc

[parkaiur]

(Un)popular Opinions ep 9!

wowowoow so like... this whole thing was a R O L L E R C O A S T E R and like ten times worse cuz im so emotionally fragile after all of this is over djfhjkhfggj

this turned into “what i liked abt each performance” instead of unpopular opinions BUT i still added some throughout so :^) 

OK LETS GET INTO IT :D 

so honesty hour~ i was scared when Seunghun was joining treasure 5... NOT that i think hes untalented in any way shape or form, but he’s the oldest and it seemed like the group would be seunghun + the kids LMAO 

BUT I WAS SURPRISED (not rly) that he fit so well into Going Crazy ??? Like i was so shook that seunghun could sing any song and totally slay it ,, like wowowow he keeps surpassing my expectations

i screamed when he appeared on stage

BOOMERANG PERF ! : ) 

ok ok okokokok for those who dont know... jihoon .... is my bias and this performance i have been dreading looking forward to the entire week

i know YG edited it and made it seem like Boomerang was too powerful and strong for dohwan and yeongue, but honestly, out of all the groups, i think boomerang was most suited for this team ,,, 

like yeongue??? singing daehwi’s parts?? i didnt know i needed that til now... their voices are so similiar (like tone and style) and their dancing was similar as well !! 

 all of them were so good? like dohwan is an amazing dancer + vocalist and yoshinori..... really.... wearing that... rapping like that.... sgjdfghsfdjgh

plus,,, where are those ppl who were calling jihoon untalented?? BOY WAS LITERALLY THE MAIN VOCAL IN THE PERFORMANCE U HOES

anyways, choi hyunsuk......... he is an amazing leader wowow like when he was leading the boys in the rehearsal and shouting at them while they were literally on stage kdfjdhskd  that was a side of him we hadnt seen before

and the fact that he choreographed the dance breaks ?!?!? like he couldve asked jihoon to help him, but the fact that he carried that on his own is AMAZING ... they truly had the hardest dance to learn and when they made it themselves,, it made everything 10x cooler 

GROWL TEAM !

well ,,, this was depressing cuz i knew only one of them would survive ... 

tbh my pick wouldnt have been junghwan, it wouldve been jongseob, but i agree that junghwan did very well !! like he has lots of stage experience and knows what to do on stage ,,,, i mean jongseob too but idk man he is underrated : / 

anyways , DUMB AND DUMBER PERFORMANCE !

ok like from that teaser... we all knew they were going to win ... it was just expected with confetti guns and backup dancers 3 members of team a +mashi and yoonbin,, all very talented boys and mashi has been training for a long time as well 

in my opinion, this song suited Byounggon and Doyoung the most! they really caught my eye in this performance !! like i knew they were going to win as soon as Byounggon yelled “PARTY PEOPLE~~” like...ok byounggon if u wanted my attention, all u had to do was just ask ;-;

byounggon looked really good in this perf... like really good..... too good *chokes*JFGKDGJKJSGF

im usually not fond of that “wet hair” style,,, but it looked so good on him...... /i cant breathe/

ALSO Doyoung’s singing??? i knew he was a good singer but this song really suited his voice and i got chills when he sang 

anyways, DNA TEAM ! :D 

they were amazing as well !! :D but their stage wasnt as flashy cuz DNA isnt really a flashy song,, its very straightforward LOL

anyways,,,,, yedam and seunghun’s high note was a literal out of body experience like i cant even function thinking abt it cuz it was so beautiful ... it was so flawless as well ... 

they sang so smoothly together ... i’ll never be over it ... 

i wish i could actually see them tho wtf was that green lighting

also can we appreciate how hard yedam works? i know lots of ppl say yyg exaggerates yedam’s talent and basically calls him a God LMAO ,,, but like,,, after this ,,, he truly is a genius cuz i cant even fathom learning a dance and song in an hour tops wowowow on top of studying for exams??and how much stress that is ?? i can barely eat when im studying for exams oml

.... he really is amazing ... and doesnt deserve all the shit yg throws at him 

OVERALL ! 

ok ok ok so now it gets controversial 

ELIMINATIONS : ( 

ok so as expected, Keita and Seunghun were eliminated which was such a shit move on yg’s part :/ like Keita is the longest running japanese trainee and seunghun is the longest running korean trainee... like wtf

and before i get shit for this, obviously i didnt want any of DNA team to be eliminated (i dont want anyone to be eliminated period),,, but c’mon ,, a 14 year old who has been training for not even a year VS 9 year and 5 year trainees ... ,, i’l admit, i think seunghun deserved that spot, 

and jeongwoo thought so too ,, like the look in jeongwoo’s eyes were not “oh yay i won!!” they were “me park jeongwoo??” kdfjdgkhsfd ,, he looked at seunghun immediately which was so sad cuz these trainees dont even have the time to be happy for themselves cuz they are too busy feeling sad for their friends... ... /sigh/

ok boomerang elimination time freaked me TF out cuz jihoon is my bias of like the entire show and ;-;;;;;;;;; jihoon ;-;;;;;; like obviously hyunsuk was expected, but i was thinking yoshinori or jihoon? really dont know with yg :/  

bUT IM SO HAPPY JIHOON MADE IT AJFKDFJSKGJ  like yes i love Yoshinori but ugh my heart hurts for jihoon .. he’s been through so much ... (but later i felt better keke)

and after those eliminations were over,,, like hyunsuk’s crying really got to me... he was crying ever since seunghun was eliminated and we all know hyunsuk cannot hide his emotions for shit so he was covering his ears during DNA eliminations and he apologized multiple times to the boomerang team and looked SO guilty... my heart ached hearing his sobs... they sounded so child-like and pitiful. it really put things into perspective ;-; 

before this, i was unsure if hyunsuk was fit to be a leader, not cuz he cant lead, but cuz he’s so emotional ... but after boomerang team, i think he really can lead Team A if/when they debut... like wow he was a really amazing leader and sometimes showing/feeling emotion can be good as a role model ... but ofc all team a members are amazing leaders LOL (also jihoon aka leader of team b)

ok i already said my peace abt growl so yeet ,,, was expected and i heard spoilers... /sigh/

and ok ok ,,, so i truly think Dumb and Dumber deserved to win,, but all the groups did so well ! i enjoyed all of them except growl tbh (maybe cuz that song has been covered so many times and im lowkey sick of it sdlkjfhdsjgs) but !! they all worked so hard :’(    

ALSO THAT ENDING AHAHAHAHA :))))

i believe the trainees who come back are Seunghun (i know it is LMAO) and Yoshinori(??) i say that cuz the camera zoomed on Treasure J members and Haruto opened his arms up for a hug !! and i feel like he would do that for another one of his members kldsjfdgahfjd 

PLUS Hyunsuk looked so happy and i know that happiness was directed at Seunghun too, but Yoshinori was also on his team which probs made him feel so much happier !! 

****** Another side note: Seunghun is LITERALLY SO UNLUCKY & HAS IT SO BAD ... like first, he lost against Mashiho when he was chosen by the 100 treasure makers (mashi was chosen by yg). then he won against yoonbin and yeongue, but was called out by everyone by being a popularity contest (which no one is complaining about now even tho these performances were all chosen by the fans ahah funny weird lmao ahah more sarcasm) + YG didnt even compliment him and/or Byounggon ?? :///  

AND ON TOP OF ALL THAT, he gets chosen to be in the Treasure 5, which i was initially SO excited for, but then D&D wins over the Treasures, leaving seunghun to be eliminated...he can never truly win ... + the only time he got complimented was right before he was eliminated, so waht the fuck...

we really though yedam was the protagonist of this show but UHH we thought wrong: it’s Seunghun !! :)))

also my inbox is open to im open to debating/talking/crying/screaming over all of this dksflhdsgkjhasf also fangirl/boying is allowed :^) especially about jihoon 

[readbythestarlight]

c2e36

So this will be 10 episodes since the one where we lost Molly. Just throwing that out there.

Also it’s apparently my 9 (NEIN) month anniversary for being subbed to G&S which means it’s also my 9 month anniversary for watching CR and also the show has been going for 9 months as of the 11th so. That’s cool.

I like that jacket, Sam.

Broadway advert lol

“Andrew Loyd Website”

“I could have backed up all night” and “I’ve grown accustomed to her encryption” I’m dead

Okay that was hands down Sam’s best ad he’s so goddamn creative

NEW YORK NEW YORK I’m so excited I loved the last live show

A SLEEVES ARE BULLSHIT SHIRT?!

I need it

Oh wait it doesn’t actually say sleeves are bullshit

I still love the shirt tho and I want one

And the bumper sticker

“It makes it sound bad when you say it like that” guys it WAS bad xD

Poor Caduceus is having an Experience

Cad: “You keep leaving”

Y: “They keep finding me”

Cad: “I think you might have the right idea”

THE FUCK? NO

guys you need to convince Caduceus to sTAY

HE’S ALIVE?!

HE HAS AN AXE IN HIS HEAD

Oh no don’t get Cad he’s sad and tired right now

I mean y’all almost left him behind which was crummy

Caleb really wanted to yank that axe out

Also how does healing work? Like does the guy have permanent brain damage in the are where the axe wrecked now? If it had hit somewhere vital to like, say, memory, would his memory be gone? Enquiring minds want to know.

When Caleb tries to be intimidating it both makes me laugh but also freaks me out a little

I LOVE when Matt has cool props

So does Travis lol

J: “Have you heard of THE Traveler”

Galen: “….Oh no not another one”

Nott and Jester building up Galen like “no no you’re totally special!!!”

“Missed all the major organs” sAM xD

“The Mist…ake” I’m crying

lol promoting this guy to first mate I’m crying

“We got a new pet!”

“Let’s call him Professor Thadeus the second!”

They forgot they had someone tied to the mast too what nerds

They cut up his nice shirt xD

I adore that Travis has totally got the islands and shit memorized so he can be super in-character

Also Cad is being too quiet it’s making me sad

Caleb The Navigator

Captain Fjord

First Mate Galen

Oh oh oh they should have a guest to come aboard and sail with them

Oh noooo they left the magic invisible cart

YES THANK YOU MATT y’all need to talk to Caduceus thank you Matt for pointing out that poor Taliesin has been silent for 30 minutes

Oh no have they somehow fucked over Cad’s mission?

I’m curious about this. Because obviously Taliesin knew this was exactly how the M9 were, so I can’t believe that he would have made Cad to be wholly incompatible with them.

He’s feeling really low and lost I think it’s time for a group hug

Him almost dying really freaked him out (and I think it really freaked Taliesin out too)

I’M HAVING A LOT OF FEELINGS RIGHT NOW WITH JESTER AND CADUCEUS YOU GUYS

Caduceus is the ship’s cook

Mmm Beau is starting to feel like Caleb is trying too hard to excuse the bad things they do

I think the dock thing was a disaster for sure but I don’t think it was necessarily that they REALLY did anything wrong?

I’m not sure what exactly Beau is feeling bad about? Like freeing the genie wasn’t wrong, the boat thing was a mistake built on bad choice but it wasn’t them being inherently bad, and they didn’t kill Algar, so?

Ah, she’s feeling like she didn’t leave Nicodranus better than she found it

I like this whole “why didn’t we try to talk it out first” thing because it’s nice that two of them are having some moral conflicts. I also like what it says about Fjord and Beau as far as character development.

I mean I don’t think boiling it down to “like we were justified in our actions” really covers what Caleb said. He did say they could have handled things a lot better, but that they did what they had to to survive a situation they could have but didn’t handle better.

“I don’t want to drive you guys away” BEAUUUU my heart

Yasha staring off south “looking for a storm”

Caduceus cooking for the group is literally just my favorite thing. They totally needed a group member who could like make them slow down and eat and just like… take care of themselves, even just for the length of the meal.

Beau went from “I’m sorry for killing these guys” to “fuck those guys they’re dead anyway let’s smear their name”

We should not split up

There’s no way any of this could go wrong

Awwww Caleb showing Nott the stars and planets so sweet

SEE Caleb understands that things went horribly wrong. I honestly think he’s just trying to keep their spirits’ up.

Nott honey you don’t have to be okay with him using suggestion, I understand you both admire and need him but you can be mad at him

“Nott is a one-earther”

Have I mentioned how much I love Caduceus?

Fjord’s just like “please tell me you mean you talk to alive grieving people and not the dead people”

Oh no

They’re coming for them

You should NOT go back

Sam is like “why the fuck are we going back” and I agree so hard

Fjord should not stay on the ship Nott is right

N: “Oh, oh, what other languages do you speak?!”

J: “I speak Infernal”

Everyone cracks up

Oh this is going to be another disaster

Although I guess the guard guys wouldn’t be expecting them to immediately come back?? Maybe??

“YOU’RE THE SAILOR GUY THIS IS YOUR WHOLE EPISODE” lol sam

“I’m gonna bake, fuck it” I LOVE CAD

“I look like Captain Crunch btw” I’m crying can’t breathe omg

Except isn’t the captain dead lol

“Unknown do-gooders” well that wasn’t the reputation I expected

UH HEY I HOPE MARION DIDN’T HEAR ABOUT THE BLUE SKINNED TIEFLING KILLING HERSELF

These lies are getting more and more ridiculous

“The little devil girl who drowned a hundred years ago” Taliesin and the idea of a ghost story is just… so perfect.

Beau stop xD

If this ghost story isn’t in campaign 3 someday I’m gonna cry

I’m so glad that Orli is coming along

They hired the tortle! :D

Nott is really being adorable with the “we are a team and you are important” thing. Obvious, but adorable.

Taliesin wanted ghost stories and now we’re getting islands people avoid because strange ancient unnatural stuff

Okay quick aside but this conversation with Yasha and Caduceus makes me think — I love how there’s this group of people who seemingly should have nothing in common, but in a lot of ways they have things they can understand about each other. Struggles they can related to. It’s really nice.

Jester and her multiple message spells lol

I’ll miss you Marion!

Oooo a glow in the water?

Awww Matt that’s really pretty!

“Sometimes the things that are the most beautiful are the things that can hurt you the worst” that’s very profound, Jester.

I’m gonna cry I don’t want Jester to be sad don’t be sad (Laura needs to stop looking like she’s gonna cry because it’s gonna make me cry)

And the way she does this little laugh like she’s trying to brush off how sad she is like STOP IT IM EMOTIONAL.

Marion was gonna leave with Jester’s dad but then he didn’t come back and I’m thinking at some point they had better kick the Gentleman’s ass for abandoning her

The way Fjord is so sweet and soft with Jester is so cute I can’t decide if I ship them or if I just want them to be soft and close but not romantic I think I’d be happy either way but my god Fjord’s being so gentle with her is killing me

“There are vegetarian options as well”

Marius: “Thank you, thank you, it’s very good—they’re crazy aren’t they?”

Cad: “Oh yeah, they’re completely crazy.”

I desperately hope they get attacked by a sea monster at some point

“Captain Tusktooth”

Tiny elf-owl Frumpkin omg

He’s loaning her tiny owl Frumpkin for a week I cry

M: “I poke him to see if he bites me”

Tr: “He’s dead”

“I’m gonna probably start talking to fish at some point in the near future” Caduceus Doolittle

When Nott is sincere like when she’s talking to Caduceus right now is so sweet

I take it back it’s too soon to talk about Molly Sam

“Between you and me, Jester’s a really bad cleric, so…” and Laura almost spits out her drink lol

I want to meet the rest of the Clays someday I hope some of them are still alive

“A sign that there could be, for all of us, another chapter” Nott is getting me in my feelings tonight

Matt: “You get the sense that the fish would be happy to”

Cad/Tal: “I’m a lunatic aren’t I?”

M: “Yeah.”

C/T: “I’m sorry.”

M: “Yeah, no, it’s great! :D”

The fish: “sure, sure, suresuresuresure sure”

Oh godddd sky monster?

Bird?

WHAT IS IT

“Professor Thadeus…?”

Oh. Fuck. Creepy flying humanoid thing.

lol Beau making sure it’s not Yasha

Oh jeez poor Yasha

…Okay Matt that wasn’t cool because it’s past midnight and the windows are open and I’m feeling weirdly paranoid now

HERE WE GO

Harpies omggggg

Caleb’s really not gonna be able to use fire for this without risking the ship

Oh fuck don’t get the deck hands

Okay the sail isn’t that big a deal Jester can probably mend it, so save the deck hand first

Harpies are not sirens that shouldn’t be allowed to do anything

Oh poor Nott

SAVE THE CREW PERSON FIRST BEAU

I love Cad’s beetles

“Snack time” Cad you’re so creepy sometimes xD

15pts of beetle damage hell yeah

Okay I take it back Beau might have done the best thing saving the sail.

Okay this is too easy of a fight tho what’s coming that’s worse

Oh daaaaamn snapped her neck with the sail rope

Caleb Nott this isn’t nice xD

“We saved his life with the power of friendship” I’m crying

F: “How do we prevent further heart episodes?”

N: “MORE FRIENDSHP. MORE FRIENDSHIP.”

Awkward friend hugs are best hugs

Nott please don’t eat harpy meat

Cad’s gonna compost the harpy

Beau is keeping Frumpkin in her pocket of course she is

Poor Travis just like “I DIDN’T KNOW ID ACTUALLY HAVE TO KNOW HOW TO CAPTAIN A SHIP” poor guy

Oh god the ship is gonna sink

They’re gonna end up stranded on the cursed island just watch

Gonna try and block the hole…. with a mattress

I’m shocked they managed to patch it bless Galen for that Nat20

Caleb being clever to save the ship with his magic bubble

I hope they don’t get Orli killed

They gonna get sunk

Oh wait

Does Caleb have to stay inside the bubble?? I hope it doesn’t start to fill too much

YAAAAAS what a good episode!

SO MUCH SAILING PIRATE-Y FUN

Oh please wear pirate outfits I’m begging

I’m so excited for next week

[the-mf-bread-babies]

1/8/20

VOLUME FOUR, PART TWO~!

WHO ELSE IS WRITING IT?! ROCCO NORTH, BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CHAPTER ONE

I CHANGED MY MIND HE DOESN'T GET KIDNAPPED lmao

After their work in protecting the house, the family went to bed. Well, except for Aaron, who watched Damon sleep just in case he died or anything.

The next morning, they woke up peacefully, to the sound of–

EXPLOOOSIIOOONNSSS!!!

Well, SHIT !!! Aaron, passed out from tiredness was still sleeping on the floor, though. “Aaron!! Wake the hell up, there's bombs!!” Damon shouted, repeatedly slapping Aaron's face. “Huh…?” Damon gave up and dragged his dad across the bedroom floor. “Hey, hey, I can walk, dude,” Aaron assured, slowly standing up.

A loud boom echoed throughout the house, alerting them even more. Although, it didn't seem like it came from an explosive, but rather, an impact. Their first thoughts were that NULL was using a battering ram on their front door.

The family assembled in the basement, equipped with weapons and protection. “So, what the hell's goin’ on now?” Gabriel asked. “Man, I thought you were gonna explain it or something.” Damon sighed as he looked at the others. “Dennis?” “I literally was friggin’ shaving when I heard the sounds?” he uselessly explained. “I was performing satanic rituals for the plants.” Lan confessed. “Okay, dad, but seriously, where are these guys?” Aaron grumbled, rubbing his forehead.

CRASH!

A hole formed in the stone basement ceiling as it came crashing down, sunlight shining into the area. A small woman whose grey hair covered her whole body to her knees swiftly emerged from the rubble, dusting herself off and hopping back outside.

“Who. Who was that.” Gabriel asked. “Do we have banshees here?” Lan added. “To my knowledge, the only ghosts related to Irish folklore in this house are the deer leg ladies and the lady who keeps using the washing machine to wash medieval armor.” Aaron explained. “Other than that, nada,”

The family halted their conversation as they heard the sound of multiple people screaming for their lives. “Okay, well, what's that?” Gabriel asked. “I– Dad, I don't even know where the rubble lady came from!” Aaron whined, the screaming still in the background.

ace: “die, bitches!”

“Yeah, pretty sure that's not NULL,” Lan pointed out. “Their agents get shot on sight after using foul language.” He revealed. “Really?” Damon asked, thinking about how bad of an agent he would be if he was recruited. “No, I just made that up.” Lan confessed, smirking. “Why…” Gabriel questioned, looking at him with a disappointed face. “Why not?”

nova: “OOH, A STUN GUN, OH NO!”

“HOWEVER WILL WE MAKE IT OUT ALIVE?!”

“HELP~!”

The four paused, noticing a third person in the fight. “Rude.” Damon commented at the girl's behavior.

sarah: “guys i accidentally fricked up the floor”

“do we have to pay insurance or whatever”

“also whats insurance”

ace: “it's a scam designed for you to die.”

Andre: “What Ace said. Also, pretty sure we don't have to do anything, since this place is a ghost town, anyways.”

jake: “mhm also theres probably horses or w/ever so watch out for that lol”

orc: “I SAW A PILE OF FROGS EARLIER”

j: “or that sometimes yknow”

The family peeked their heads out from inside, eavesdropping on the conversation.

o: “YEA BUT THE THING IS”

“I DONT KNOW HOW TO HOLD FROGS”

sar: “you have to like. gently carry those gentlemen around. palm at the side, fingers supporting their body and your thumb keeps them in place, orc, my friend,”

a: “ALSO SPRAY THE BITCHES!”

s: “yea spray them they like it it's fun n stuff”

andre: “Where. Where's the little froggies.”

j: “idk im scared”

a: “coward”

o: “ALSO SCARED OF FROGS”

“THEY ARE METAPHORICALLY CHILDREN”

s: “explain”

o: “SMALL AND CAN DIE EASILY ALSO WEIRDLY SLIMY AND SOFT”

andre: “Babies aren't slimy tho…”

o: “FLORIDA”

an: “oh ok”

“NULL doesn't usually talk about frogs.” Dennis pointed out. “They don't.” Damon agreed. “Also, they don't have members that tall. Or short.” Aaron commented. “Rebel gang?” Lan suggested. Gabriel squinted his eyes, staring at the group. “Last time I checked, undercover NULL agents, even if they exist, don't hide that kind of hair under their helmets. That kid next to the banshee there definitely does not have helmet hair, I mean, the volume and all…”

“hmm? i think those are peeeoopleeee” “guyss” The stylish hair kid pointed out. “cuz i dont think horses look like that!!!!!!!” they exclaimed, strutting towards the basement. “im scared” “help” “yall” “yall means all” they continued, facing their group. “Well, damn, Ace, if it's a horse, give it a carrot or something.” another voice said nonchalantly.

“meanie” “ill kill u” Ace threatened threateningly. “I CAN GO WITH YOU IF YOU WANT!!” A voice offered politely. “thanks nova!!!!!!! andre u can choke” Ace thanked, proceeding with Nova to the basement, the family anxiously awaiting them.

Ace had a normal, skinny, 5'7"-ish body, and they had a sharp jaw and small eyes. Their hair was brightly colored, with brown roots turning into an orange and then into a red, with yellow tips. They were wearing a gray vest above a loose black sleeveless shirt. Also jeans and shoes. Ace is not naked or something.

Nova, on the other hand, towered over Ace. She wore a trucker hat that pushed down her thick hair enough to cover her eyes, and it was tied into two big puffs. Her hair was dyed different shades of green in small spots, making it look like a small, bright shrub sitting on her head. She wore a denim jacket with lots of enamel pins stuck to it. Beneath that was a grey t-shirt, and below that were ripped jeans and UGG boots… somehow, in the amalgamated world.

“Hi! We're the Russell family!” Aaron welcomed, nearly giving them heart attacks by LOON∆ i should listem to that again. “What the fuck?!” Andre remarked, leading the rest into the basement. He was wearing a silky-looking black button-up shirt with a red tie with dress shoes, and his dreadlocks were neatly tied back. He certainly wore a fancy look for raiding NULL bases.

“Yeah, I'm Aaron, this is my dad Gabriel, my dad Lan, my husband Dennis, and my son, (no matter what,) Damon. We have 36 cats and countless ghosts here. Please proceed with caution, most of these babies are strictly indoors-only!”

The group stared at them in shock, unable to believe anything Aaron just said. “How… do you get… 36 cats…” Andre asked. “We used to have a pet shop. It fell down, though, so that's that.” Dennis answered casually. “like. how. like fell down into space” A blue-haired man asked, earning him Damon's full attention.

“Yeah, into space.” Gabriel said. “Just straight down.” Lan elaborated, “No stops or anything, just ZOOP!” “Yeah, that's why we moved into a haunted mansion.” Aaron added. “So, what group are you guys in?” he asked, making a head shoot up in surprise from one of them.

He had gelled blue hair parted in the middle, and his right eye seemed like it had something inserted in it. He wore a dark blue denim jacket with ripped off sleeves and very short, tight jorts. He also had black wristbands, indicating a past emo phase. Or one that's still ongoing, as made obvious by his combat boots.

“oh its kinda indie u guys. u guys probably dont know it :,(” The blue-haired man said sadly, pouting. “We're called the…” Andre began. “C'mon, Jakey, say it.” “no its dumb” he grumbled. “skullsmashers. it's because we smash people's skulls. metaphorically.” Ace explained, asking Jake for confirmation. “right, 8-ball?”

“we really dont......” Jakey/8-Ball said sadly. “Oh, you named us this, Jakey, honey,” Andre contested. “So why can't we smash people's skulls? Like, clearly, I can take the emotional trauma or whatever, as long as it's NULL, or hell, maybe even some dipshit, I can do that.” he added softly.

“Ah, pretty sure they're not NULL,” Lan said, smiling. “So, did you kill them all of them or what?” he asked as he raised his weapon, a mace he was somehow managing to hold with ease. Like. A mace with spikes. Ace nervously played with their hair, sporting a terrified face. “what!?” they exclaimed in a high-pitched voice. “We can definitely take care of them. How do you think this place is officially a ghost town?” Gabriel asked. “Setting up traps and making friends with the local ghosts go a long way, y'know,”

“There's fucking ghosts?!” Andre exclaimed, pulling out daggers from under his arms. “Yeah, but they're nice, so it's okay.” Damon explained with not a trace of fear in his eyes, making Andre slowly put the daggers back in. “Oh, by the way, if you guys see an arm there, could you get it for me?” he requested politely, “And honestly, I'd like to make a pun with lending hands, but I can't seem to put my finger on which one I'd make.” He added, raising his bandaged stump.

“Oh, Jake, don't–” Andre warned before Jake fainted instantly from seeing the bloody bandages on Damon's wound. “I'm sorry,” he apologized. The fainting had sent Aaron quickly went to the operating room, just now realising that he hasn't changed the bandages yet. “uh lemme go check if theres any” the small woman said, scuttling away. “Thanks,” Damon said before following Aaron.

Dennis, Lan, and Gabriel stood awkwardly in front of The Skullsmashers, not knowing what to do. “So, uh, whaddya do?” Dennis asked, folding his hands together. “gamign” Ace quickly responded. “Well, we each tend to go our own ways, but occasionally we team up to raid NULL bases and stuff.” Andre explained, ignoring Ace's statement. “What about you guys?”

“Ah, so I like gardening, and also do some baking from time to time, and Gabriel here used to be a traveling psychic, but now he tends to help me with errands and chores and sometimes we communicate with the ghosts here. Dennis and Aaron used to run a pet shop near here, but now Dennis does some farming, and Aaron spends his spare time caring for our pets.” Lan explained.

“And I do the groceries! And all the other stuff that involves going outside,” Damon intervened, coming back with an anxious, squeaky-clean Aaron. “Which is why my arm got cut off.” he revealed, sitting down on the wooden floor. “ok im back did i miss anything :'//” Jake asked, waking up from his faint earlier. “… we'll catch up later.” Andre replied.

“arm!!!” The banshee yelled out excitedly, waving a cooler back and forth. “Great! Just toss it down,” Aaron said happily, reaching his arms out. Seeing this, Damon ran to the operating room. “Last one's a rotten egg!” he shouted, snickering. “Well, while they work on that, do you guys maybe wanna come in and grab a snack?” Gabriel suggested politely, eager to learn more about the group. “yea sure!! thanks!!” said Jake, who was joyfully running to the front door.

A large figure stood patiently outside the door, belonging with the Skullsmashers. It seemed like a gentle giant, tapping its index fingers together. It was definitely from another world. It had greenish grey skin, and its head was blocky and looked like it was separate from his large jaw that had two moles on it. Its eyes were big and white, and above them were thick eyebrows. And it was wearing what seemed to be a large, furry, ruff reaching his knees that were covered by jorts. Its shoulders were completely covered with a large spiky red boulder on each one. The creature was ten feet tall, and was very strong.

At last, the large doors opened with a creak, the sunlight from outside shining brightly into the house. It was the first time in years that the front doors were opened, and it was for good; they had stayed in there for too long.

CHAPTER TWO

A PROPER INTRODUCTION

The family and the group were sitting in the dining hall, awaiting the arrival of Aaron and Damon. A shit ton of homemade potato chips were strewn across a long plate in the middle as the main course. Lan had prepared a variety of dipping sauces and some napkins. They sat in silence.

“I don't mean to be rude or anything, but how… are you guys still alive?” Andre asked cautiously, starting a conversation. Gabriel dipped a chip in cheese sauce, then thought of a simple answer: “We really just hide and plant stuff. Also, we were really lucky.”

Nova played around with a fork, debating whether these people were real or not. Yes, NULL couldn't possibly use their precious budget to make intricately designed haunted houses with personal touches and residents whose personalities were very unique, as well as their relationship with each other, but, hell, maybe they can.

NULL always had a way to worm themselves everywhere, down to the place she stayed in, the people she knows, and, well, really, everywhere. Even if this family was what they presented themselves as, NULL could do lots of things to not only dishevel Nova and the group she was in, as well as this family, they can manipulate both of them to destroy each other. After all, that's the kind of thing they do– get someone else to do their dirty work.

Nova made up her mind, opting to ask them directly. “I also really don't mean to be rude, but given the large amount of undercover NULL agents and all the different ways they come as, I just have to ask… and this is a very dumb, and useless question, but are you guys in any way… involved with NULL?”

Dennis smiled lightly, understanding that this group was in the same deliberation as they were. “To be honest, we were gonna ask you that too at some point, but I personally don't think NULL agents would look this…” “well, they wouldn't, like… have wrists this limp.”

The room was silent for a while, before erupting with laughter. “You– you fuckin’ thought we weren't NULL because–” Andre struggled, wheezing. “No NULL agent would dress like that, Andre,” Gabriel pointed out, snickering. “Yeah, you think those idiots can achieve this level of interior design?!” Lan added, gesturing wildly towards every piece of furniture in the hall.

“… But really, to answer your question there, yeah, we are technically involved with NULL,” Dennis said, completely changing the atmosphere of the room. “We're classified as Class-4 criminals for, um, giving some of their agents here some mild inconveniences.” he added in a serious tone. “And by mild inconveniences, I mean a few cases of attempted murders, robberies, hauntings, and other stuff like that.” The group sighed a breath of relief, knowing they were both on the same page.

“I have to say, 45 cases of attempted murder and two cases of successful murder does sort of count as a bit more than a mild inconvenience, though, Dennis,” Lan said jokingly. “Oh, and remember when someone planted poison ivy that somehow mysteriously completely wrapped around the whole base they had here, down to the basement?” he added, grinning. “Okay, well let's not compare our crimes here, dad,” Dennis teased. “Everybody knows mine was the best attack yet when I trapped them inside the base by encasing it with raw eggs! somehow” he added, cackling.

The two families had a great time together, laughing and talking about their experiences in the new lives they lived caused by the amalgamation. Meanwhile, Aaron was carefully reattaching an arm to an unconscious Damon. After some hard work, he succeeded, and did his best to celebrate in the operating room.

However, at this point, he became too tired to do so, considering the fact that he alone performed an entire surgery. Still, it was a miracle for both of them. He waited for Damon to wake up and see the finished product, but he ended up passing out while making a celebratory coffee.

The two slept well and endlessly. The rest of the family, however, were faced with a tough decision to make. Dennis, Gabriel, and Lan had the same question echo in their minds:

“Would you like to consider joining us, The Skullsmashers?”

It was a question Andre always asked to those who he saw potential in, no matter who– or whom, no idea. They could be two friends living in a dilapidated house with rats and mice, or three odd creatures in a grocery store, or even some nervous teenager who suddenly asked him to kill someone in the middle of his New Year's Eve party.

It's not that he simply sees something out of the ordinary happen and immediately hands out flyers, but it's that Andre has been gifted with an eye for this type of thing– take, for example, the situation at hand.

Andre raids a NULL base with his friends. The fight continues into the abandoned city the base was in. His friend lands into a basement of a house. Sarah, the friend, points out that there are people living in said house. Said people are clearly weird.

Resident asks for his arm back. Very weird. Still little to no potential, except maybe for interior design. Residents invite them for dinner. Residents have knives and shit.

Potential spotted. nah jk lemme do this again lol

[TAKE TWO]

Okay, okay. Andre doesn't just see people doing weird shit and immediately hires them, contract and all, but instead he observes them further.

If he sees someone hurling flaming batons into the sky, that person does have potential, yes, definitely, but what kind? This style of combat could definitely be a possibility in their attacks, given the practicality and the ostentatiousness of it.

However, it's an art one could hardly practice. The perils one could face are far too much for such a display. But, even though it's inconvenient, it's still very useful. If there was a good amount of accelerant on the baton, an enemy could not only receive a strong blow, but the added accelerant will most likely set them on fire too, rendering them not only useless in further combat (unless they're a very determined individual) but also a potential threat to anyone near them.

And the fact that a person is employed as the weapon is more convenient than, say, a large flaming baton-throwing machine, which would be difficult to program and to bring to an attack.

However, Andre also has to consider the person (itself? themselves? idk man) in an approach. Maybe they're NULL, or maybe even just someone who wants to throw flaming stuff into the air with no deeper meaning or intent. Maybe this person is unsuitable for combat; maybe this person is an enemy or a rival.

The approach is like a job interview– ask them about their experience in the field, if they have any other [good points?? is good points the word], if they're okay with joining the group– but sadly, he lives in a world where anything wildly good or wildly bad can happen, and it makes the whole process a whole lot more harder.

So, maybe these people inviting them over for a meal might give them a new addition or two. Or, sadly, remove some members.

Will the Russell family join The Skullsmashers? The decision has to be made any second now.

• end •