#fuck john mayer

[jamiethenerd]

my soul leaving my body when dear john (taylor’s version) comes on

[aspentr3e]

Foolish One hits HARD, love it tho

[byebyelullabye]

was saving this until speak now tv came out and i mean i would've, could've, should've but i don't really want to-

IF I SEE JOHN MAYER, IT'S ON SIGHT

[firefliesandfuckery]

i think being put in a rage room with a baseball bat and would’ve could’ve should’ve on loop would solve all of my problems

[zuzanda]

i can imagine sirius singing the line “give me back my girlhood it was mine first” from would’ve could’ve should’ve from the bottom of his lungs but instead of girlhood he’d sing childhood

[disastercomingfaster]

Can we talk about this amazing Taylor Swift pop up bar that I went to the other day???? Complete with a John Mayer dartboard!

[holiday-house-tehe]

"give me back my girlhood it was mine first."

[indeliblescarspivotalmarks]

i had to🤭

[topperscumslut]

currently obsessed with bill hader’s john mayer impression cuz it’s so unflattering and so accurate like yes daddy read him to filth

[anthroxlove]

Jessica Simpson Takes The Narrative Back From John Mayer, Who Seems To Be Even Worse Than We All Thought

The portrait of Mayer she creates is one that feels incredibly familiar in the worst way. John Mayer is That Guy — the one our friends can’t stand, but we can’t shake. Here’s but a small rundown of some of the revelations Simpson provides to cement her case that Mayer is the King of That Guys:

Mayer and Simpson met while she was still married, and in 2006, soon after her divorce from Lachey, the two began a secret relationship. 

Simpson worried she wasn’t “smart” enough for Mayer, writing: “He was so clever and treated conversation like a friendly competition he had to win. One minute he was explaining the start of his Rolex collection, and then another he was going on about a collector who he was jealous of, then the nature of jealous, then the concept of time and the heft of it on your wrist….” 

Mayer allegedly broke up with Simpson nine times, and each time it was over email. He apparently even followed up one break-up email by sending her the song “Angel” by Aerosmith which, NO. 

Simpson claims Mayer told her she drank too much, but rather than get her help he gave her Xanax. (In the book Simpson talks openly about her dependence on alcohol and prescription drugs, and details her long road to achieving sobriety.)

Simpson had collaborated and performed with Lachey a number of times, and though their relationship was over, she felt, sentimentally, that it was their “thing.” Once Mayer found this out, he allegedly tried to force Simpson to let him produce one of her songs. She was so overcome with anxiety that “her vocal cords became frozen” in the recording studio Mayer broke up with her again in an email (obv) shortly after.

While she was dating football player Tony Romo, Mayer insinuated himself into the lives of Simpson’s family via his friendship with Fall Out Boy’s Pete Wentz, who was at the time married to her sister Ashlee. Mayer became a regular at her parent’s home, confessing his love for their daughter – conveniently right after she was profiled in Vanity Fair. Dadager Joe, of course, thought Mayer was “charming”. 

After Romo broke up with Simpson for emailing with Mayer (she also alleges that Romo went through her cell phone), the singer-songwriter quickly invited her to his home. “I felt like I was in the closing scenes of an epic, sweeping love story, and the romantic hero had beaten out the star quarterback,” Simpson writes. But when she arrived at his house, Mayer said, “Oh, you don’t get me yet.” He then forced her to listen to him perform songs from his new album.  

“I almost puked,” writes Simpson. That — finally — was the end for her.

[anderperries]

the only problem i have with cyber bullying of john mayer is that i wish i could bully him in real life too

[int0themist]

hey when this meme went semi viral on twitter i did not expect john mayer to be next because of anything except speak now but damn was i wrong

[noshelfcontrol81]

Taylor's Version of Dear John comes out next month.

[supesideblog]

Do Taylor Swift lyrics ever leave you like: HE DID WHAT 😦👺🖕🏻

[kaleidoscopicbee]

so are we going to talk about the parallelism with promising young woman when she says promising grown man in would've could've should've?

[ursogorgeous-13]

‘now go stand in the corner and think about what you did’ TAYLOR IM DEAD YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME