#fuckinggggg weird

[hecaestus]

it is my bday

[thermesiini]

ugh i could say more but all that’s in the past and besides it was behavior that i also participated in

[ammyandissunbesties4lyfe]

loving how okamiden so far is just like. you are going to meet some weird kids and they are going to love you so much.

[transwolvie]

pearl clutching about rising crime rates and painting any urban center or large city as dangerous and crime-ridden is just racism it is literally JUST racism especially anti-black racism like that is all it really is

[readymades2002]

briefly confided in my mother (mistake i never learn from) about how i am very sad that my ability to have a social life in the world is tied entirely to my sibling, who will be leaving here soon, and how i do not have any other way to get out of the house and how i do not feel i have anything besides work and despite everything that came after, including an apology for saying it, the first thing she said was “well i don’t have anything else either” which is exactly what prevented me from saying anything earlier because i knew that and i know that she is very good at going “it is what it is” about the most miserable of conditions and so would never admit to being unhappy about anything even though there is so much to be unhappy about including having to raise me to begin with, and that she also gets annoyed when others complain or are unhappy about anything because SHE does it and so why can’t everyone do it. and. well. i am pretty nervous about what this means for my life (nonexistent) going forward

[istherewifiinhell]

another gross but satisfying body sensation

i dont know why i keep thinking of these. sorry. but on time recent ishly. i had like. ear weirdness. and it desensitized my hearing on that side. CONCERNING. and like. turned me all. dog with an ear infection mode. counted NOT shake me head and itch. so yes i did flush my ear at home. and several other more dubious things. but the flushing it what worked. BRUH. no fuckinggggg wonder i couldnt hear. musta. MUSTA BEEN. the whole of my ear canal in diameter. MADE A SOUND. AND EVERYTHING. could FEEL IT. working its way out. like. HORRIBLE. daunting. a fucking ordeal. but. CAN U BEAT THAT SENSATION. probably not.

[mndvx]

Feels like they made Maxine this weird psycho stalker murderer just for shock value and that's kinda boring and also FUCKINGGGGG lame as shit

[tomatoluvr69]

God. Goddddddd I had this weird premonition when interviewing for this job that a particular professor/my capstone and academic advisor from college would send her daughter here. And guess who I saw on day 2 picking her up 🙄 fuck my lifeeeeeeeeeeee the smallness of this city is killing me. And I think we had a good teacher/student relationship but she saw me flounder HARD in a particular aspect of fieldwork I can’t get into too much detail about without doxxing my field. But I only floundered because through the training, we had to participate as the participants a LOT, and it was really weird and traumatic for me even though I have led/facilitated this thing 1,000,000 times with no issue (as a WORKER— it was being a student that was difficult and weepy), and she saw me cry and fail and it was fucking tough, and when I graduated I was so relieved to be moving on and excited to blend into the sea of half-remembered former students in the rear view mirror even though a) the program was super small and I worked closely with her a lot over several years especially when I got to the upper levels and there were only a few of us and b) during my capstone year in 2020 a dear friend of mine at the college with whom I was planning to move in died in a traumatic and sudden way and she and I touched base a ton about balancing my academic demands as that and covid hit and whatnot. So there’s no way she’d forget me but Jesus Christ the last semester of senior year was heinous from all the terrifying fieldwork even though I’d been a model student up until then. Like memories of certain incidents have the power to stop me in my tracks with self-consciousness two years later. So to have her realize that someone like that is literally responsible for running through those things with her daughter…what on earth is the protocol for becoming the instructor of your instructor’s child???????????? Scream I hate this city so much lmfao. Oh AND to cap it all off I already know she takes her daughter to swim lessons one night a week while i am swimming laps which I fucking HAAAAAATE when I run into people I know. But to literally go from my job which is now person-I-know adjacent to my fuckinggggg safe space immediately afterwards is almost comical

[lesbiangiratina]

kat can I have a second opinion on this? is it weird if someone names themselves after your legal name after you haven't spoken to them in years? it's mad uncomfortable to be on the receiving end of this. my sister thinks it's understandable for them 2 do this to me 😭

I WOULD ? FEEL WEIRD ABOUT IT I THINK? But the severity depends on the vibe of the person i think like. Not to pry you dont have to elaborate but id feel weirder if we drifted apart for a reason and not just. Ships passing in the night. So like um. Id feel real weird if i didnt like them basically. But if it was Just someone i used to know if be like fuckinggggg okay? Sure? I dont know. ESPECIALLY like full legal first name wtf

[thegeminisage]

tng update time. last night we did "the child" and today i did "where silence has lease"

the child: GOOD. FUCKINGGGGG. LORD

first of all, i watched this after having been awake since 4am and working all day and then getting hate mail on my fanfics. i was so sleep deprived it's unreal. i dissolved into hysterics multiple times

the first time i think was after deanna got impregnated. i did say with my real mouth "i hope it's riker" and then regret it because i didn't actually hope that but truly i think we would have been better off

the second time i can't really remember. i think it was after the kid talked the first time. immediately my primal instincts screamed at me that the child was unholy and unnatural. anyway both times we had to pause for several minutes in order for me to collect myself

why did we have to have a meeting in front of all deanna's peers talking about the changes in her body and whether or not she should get an abortion...like im with worf, abort that thang, but what the fucj

at first i was kind of excited that dr crusher would be leaving because she is an exhausting character to contend with. now i realize i was a fool. with no dr crusher and no tasha yar deanna troi has to take on the role of Every woman. i made a joke in which the punchline was the mother the son and the holy spitroast but i don't think it's as funny without the leadup

also, on the replacement dr: i hate her forever for being mean to data. first mispronouncing his name and then being like ehhh who cares when corrected AND THEN being like wow this bag of bolts can actually get his feelings hurt! i'll kill her

am pleased to say i recognized her from tos not because of her face but because of her voice. score one for the ol' voice acting ear

anyway i kept going i be BEVERLY (upgraded from dr crusher) could have saved deanna's satan baby because at least she can FUCKING PRONOUNCE DATA'S NAME RIGHT. i hope beverly left because picard wouldn't stop making eyes at his ex it would serve him right

wesley was fine in this episode for once.

HIIII GUINAN HIIIIIIII wow she looks so young. just like in sister act, the primary thing i know her from. weird to have her playing shrink to wesley this entire time but i'm sure we'll get more from her later

anyway having deanna speedrun motherhood in 36 hours Because She's A Woman made me for the first time consider skipping some episodes on tng. but i couldn't do my skip/watch list that way so i will SIGH persevere.

where silence has lease: im blogging this as i go. first of all since the first few seconds of this have no dialogue i was excited and thought we were about to get a whedon-eqsue no-dialogue episode but alas. no.

secondly. "im worried about riker AND worf there are certain elements of the klingon psyche its best to be ignorant about" like girl are they fucking?? not quite but almost. riker was sooo dirty. paused the episode to inform cathy of this and got this gem

anyway, the skeleton prosthetics were good but i ca already feel that this is going to be a "klingons are so big and scary and savage" kind of racism day

worf automatically gaslighting himself about the klingon legend is SO sad especially bc we as viewers KNOW its gotta be true. get vored idiots

why is wesley always on the bridge now instead of geordi...is he just always in engineering now? that is Too sad

THIS BITCH JUST CALLED DATA "IT"?????????????? I WILL KILL HER MYSELF

like i cannot believe she is doubting DATAS ABILITY TO DO HIS JOB more than the fucking SIXTEEN YEAR OLD sitting next to him just bc wesley is human and data isnt. ill fucking kill her. i never thought id say this but i miss beverly

jonathan frakes has asked lots of questions this episode

this freaky ass unreality void thing that doesn't actually exist is sooooo fucking cool. stuff like this is what i like about scifi...sometimes the scifi premise is stupid but sometimes it fucks

WHATEVER RIKER AND WORF HAVE GOING ON IN THIS EPISODE. IS GAY. riker telling him to pull himself together and worf repeating his words from earlier...prolonged eye contact...i wish tng was like this all the time

actually riker is kinda fun in this episode...he keeps giving orders without waiting for picard's okay and he is soooo upset when he gets back from that freaky ship

WHOA THAT CGI FACE WAS FREAKY AND BAD

LMAOOO AT THIS ALIEN GOING AFTER THE DR FOR BEING FEMALE. WHEN DEANNA IS RIGHT THERE. like "your contruction is different" not to the half betazoid or the klingon but to the WOMAN. well if anyone deserves it

wow. love that they got ordered to fuck nasty on the bridge <3 riker and worf should volunteer

SIGHHH of course they kill the random black guy redshirt

started to have respect for picard when once again he was willing to blow up the ship rather than submit to enemy will but then he ruined it by going eeeh idk riker how much time do YOU think we need before the self-destruct? like how much time do they need to prepare to die?? and then riker was like uhh idk 20 minutes? like if you're gonna do it just do it. jesus christ. don't even tell them first it's so much kinder. there are FUCKING children aboard

AND HES JUST GONNA SIT IN HIS QUARTERS AND LISTEN TO MUSIC? INSTEAD OF COMFORTING PEOPLE OR DOING HIS JOB? it's always one step forward two back with this show

THOSE FREAKY HALLUCINATIONS TRICKED ME...it's just like data to ask about death. but it wasn't him!!

the ending to this was actually a little anticlimactic but i did enjoy the journey. too bad it wasn't a big klingon ship eating monster though

one down, five to go 😤

[foxtriestobiteandmaimandkilland]

ok yknow. there have been 3 times smth rlly fucking. weird. has happened 2 me. bc when i first got into toh, i didnt rlly follow any specifically owl house related blogs. but one blog id followed 4 a dif fandom started posting abt toh and i was like. wow funny coincident. then a few months later after i got into hollow knight, a blog (who may or may notve been the same idk) also got into hollow knight, even if i yet again hadnt followed any hollow knight specific blogs. and now that im getting into jrwi riptide, theres been a few posts on my dash from a blog i followed for a different fandom. of jrwi. and im just fuckinggggg. surrounded in coincidences. like the same thing happened a while back not on tumblr but id started reading a book anddd. i dont remember what it was only that it happened. but ik it was specifically a book bc it was important it was a physical media that couldnt take my data. but after reading this book i started seeing a buncha stuff online abt the book. altho it couldve been coincidence or like that one thing w the errr. that one toothpaste post. wait no it cantve been bc i borrowed this book from a friend BUT i think it was that friend who sent me a buncha stuff abt this book and THEN i saw all the stuff abt it ok. yea. anyways. coincidences.

[autismonauta]

Ranting time:

It is me or do a LOT of people get so uncomfortably cozy in just freely saying the stupidest fucking shit ever and like being all grand standy about it? When in turn, it’s just a greater reflection of the negatives to whom you had slung back at you. It’s weird, very weird—how people can get so hung up on the most meaningless shit imaginable from either ends of the spectrum. Like does it just not compute to the greater mind? Doesn’t help I wanna slap the shit outta some especially dumb fucks for just…making nonsense of things that more personally hit close to home for me wether it’s my brain business, cultural background stuff, or just anything within my hobbies and passions.

Like jeez almighty, bitches just LOVE assuming shit about without checking if whether their made up version of you or whoever matches up with what they’re or yourself is actually like. Honestly I’m not even sure why I’m getting all up in a tangents rant about it but it just really fucks me up how often I witness something either way outta pocket or sneakily disguised as o the wizened when it’s just a bunch bullshit. Good, be uncomfortable by my presence and existence. My brain ain’t normal and I sure as shit am proud for it. I often forget it ain’t normal like 70-80% of the time!

Man, I gotta text post more. Only like a small classrooms worth of people will see this shit. Even funnier is I’m pretty sure a few of the attendees are just like little mannequin robot dolls with a face taped to the front. What would I even talk about? I got a new bird and hot cash so that’s sweet; even got new furniture. The bird is sweet but also…when will the fuckinggggg birds bond—sure is taking awhile. Plus I’d rather not be like one of the few people who hangs with em. For as often as they ask about the birds some family don’t seem too keen on interacting with them. He’s a little guy, a little guy! Anyways…enough of this, I got a license to renew this morning and I’ve only passed out for a few hours yet.

[depressedfungus]

Why out of all the harry potter characters did I have to get attached to the one I had no idea died.

[pretendinglovechanginglies]

ED thoughts

This time last year I was just scaling the 65kg range. I wasn’t fat fat (especially comparing myself to what I weigh now). I was overweight but still fit. I had muscle and a smaller waist. 

This year, I’m approx 80kgs, bigger waist, rounder face, double chin, fat legs, weak as fuck.....fuck my life hey. I’m trying to get used to this body, but tbh I feel like my body is hating on me. Its like it knows I’m heavier. My back hurts when I sit down too long and I am pretty much out of breath when I go upstairs. Do I hate the change? Yes, Yes I fuckinggggg hate the change. I’m a person who hates change in general so this was something big to adapt to. I’m still not used to it and I think I never will be. I’m trying to incorporate exercise without it being a negative experience and that has been challenging also. But I’m trying. And trying is better than nothing right now. 

I’ve put all my smaller sized clothes away and my style has become loose and baggy. I don’t care for my appearance as much and I’ve deactivated my ig recently. Its weird being without it, but I feel like its doing me good. I’m not prioritizing my appearance like I used to. I’m not basing my worth on my looks. I’m trying to get over it. I’m sure I’ll be back soon. Eventually...But if it brings up these feelings again, its better that its not in my life right now. I’m trying to be better than last year. 

[lifeiszestyy]

*i always get confused when i see visuals for wicked because uase it’s always from the musical, which is fine on it’s own

*i just......... vastly prefer the book because it deals with loss and themes of good and evil and prejudice in a more complicated way

*also the prince had blue skin and he was very much described in his behavior and culture in a way more similar to poc, so seeing him as a white boy is fuckinggggg weird to me

[pasteliume]

i expected a kiss tonight just not the one i got. life is so fuckinggggg weird haha ha hahaha