#god creating this lil universe the last like five months or so has been so much damn fun

[tirednotflirting]

remind me how it used to be

we did it! we wrote a sequel to all too well jalex! (and by we i mean myself and the ever amazing and wonderful @reveriesofawriter)

alt title (aka meghna’s doc title): how you get the jack lol

once again it has been so much fun to build up this little world and write with meghna. especially in this where we got to play around some more with timeline and such like i feel like every time we would chat about or work on this fic i was learning so damn much. meghna, my love, thank you for making writing so much fun. this has been such a blast and i love these boys and this story so much.

lots of alcohol mention in this bc boyboy still owns a bar and i’m a total lush so as always there’s just lots of wine lol

if you wanna read the first part of this you can find it heeeeeere

and if ao3 is more your jam, you can find that for this part here

ps - bella we fixed it :          )

Jack pulls his door open expecting it to be Zack or Rian, but instead he’s face to face with someone who might as well be a ghost. Lightning flashes behind Alex as he stands two steps outside Jack’s front door, soaking wet with the first of the summer storms. His hair is plastered across his forehead, little rivulets running down his face from every strand.

The last thing Jack expects is for this obvious hallucination to speak, but as soon as he does, it’s a lot harder to believe he’s not real, a living breathing human, dripping with rainwater like he’s been out in the storm all day. “I wasn’t planning on asking this, but can I come in?”

Jack blinks a few times, thinking maybe it’s some kind of rainbow-type of mirage that’ll disappear with enough time, but Alex is still there. Jack wordlessly pulls the door open wider and leaves Alex in the hallway as he mumbles something about grabbing a towel and leaves the room. As if in a fever dream, he texts Rian that he might be going crazy. He grabs a towel and glances down when Rian replies asking wtf he means by that, but decides he should check and see if he really did imagine it all before involving other people in his overactive daydreams.

When he steps back into the hallway, Alex is still standing in front of the door, dripping water onto the hardwood floor. He’s wringing his hands like he’s uncomfortable, which makes two of them. Jack hands him the towel and tries not to watch as Alex runs it over his face and hair before wrapping it around his shoulders.

When Alex stops moving, Jack finally finds his words. “What are you doing here?”

Alex didn’t expect Jack to let him in when he got in his car half an hour ago and then sat there for a length of time telling himself it was worth it to drive all the way here. He didn’t expect Jack to let him in when the sky cracked open and started pouring rain the second he pulled out of his driveway – it was only a sign if he let himself think so, because it always rains this time of year. He didn’t expect Jack to let him in when he got a flat tire a couple blocks away from Jack’s house and decided fuck it, he was running the rest of the way if that’s what it took. He didn’t expect it even as he stood outside and rang the doorbell and saw the pure shock on Jack’s face when the door swung open.

And yet, here he is, drenched and cold and beyond uncomfortable for neither of those reasons after Jack said something about getting a towel and ran in the direction of his bedroom. Six months ago, Alex would have let himself in without knocking and made himself at home beside Jack wherever he was despite being wet, because Jack would be warm and annoyed but would cuddle him back.

Jack gives him a towel as promised and shifts awkwardly until Alex at least has his face dry. “What are you doing here?” he asks. It’s not an unfounded question, but somehow he doesn’t have this part planned out. Is this where he starts apologizing? For showing up out of the blue? Or for literally everything else?

Jack has been tiptoeing around him for nearly an hour, and of course he understands why, but it’s making his own restlessness that much worse. He’d called a towing company for his car and had made it clear that he planned on leaving as soon as they got there, but he hasn’t gotten a call yet and it’s only Jack’s hospitality keeping him from walking back to his car and sitting inside alone for who knows how much longer.

Alex hadn’t known how to start apologizing, so he hadn’t. He told Jack he got a flat tire and just happened to be close enough to drop by. He’d explained he’d been wanting to stop by anyway, but Jack was taking everything he said with a wary eye, and Alex couldn’t blame him, so he settled for small talk, hoping it would eventually stop feeling so forced.

“You’re teaching?” Jack asks. He’s sitting on a whole other chair, and it might as well be in another house.

“I am a teacher, that’s kinda my job.”

“I thought you liked having summers free. To explore the world and all that.”

Six months later and Alex wishes he wasn’t surprised that Jack remembers anything so minute about him. It almost gives him hope that maybe this isn’t just Jack being too polite to kick him out. “I didn’t feel like going anywhere. I guess I just wanted a distraction.” He hopes Jack knows he doesn’t mean he wanted a distraction from him, when Jack has been his distraction from everything happening around him in the direction of the future for as long as he can bear to remember. Almost the opposite, summer school is supposed to be distracting him from wanting to run. He’s made that mistake enough times to know when he has something strong enough and pure enough to hold onto. “Besides, paychecks from teaching only go so far.”

“I’m sure you would have managed.” Jack is still holding his empty mug even though he finished his tea a while ago. Alex hadn’t had to ask him to make it, but while he was on the phone, Jack had made them both cups and handed one to Alex as soon as he hung up. It was surely partly to give his hands something to do, but Jack still knows how he likes his tea, which isn’t nothing.

“I didn’t want to waste my summer when I had a reason to stick around.” Jack looks a little surprised, but otherwise Alex can’t read his expression. Alex switches which leg he’s sitting on so he’s leaning slightly closer to Jack. “I hate how things ended—how I ended things between us. I’ve regretted it ever since. You always deserved a better explanation, and I don’t- I didn’t leave. I always leave, but I didn’t, and it took me this long to figure out why. I’m sorry for everything I said. I wish I could take it all back.”

Jack has gone from surprised to shocked, and Alex doesn’t know if anything he just said makes sense at all. He’s supposed to be home modifying a power point about Henry VIII to fit the summer school curriculum, and instead he’s sitting in the heaviest silence he’s ever felt, because he can’t say sorry again until Jack says something. “I’ll be right back,” is what Jack finally says. He takes his mug when he leaves the room and Alex has a feeling he’s texting Rian in the kitchen, which is his cue to leave.

He pulls the towel off his shoulders and heads toward the bathroom where he knows Jack’s hamper is. It strikes him as he tosses the towel in that he still remembers where the hamper even is. It feels like lifetimes ago that he was in this house last. On his way back, he walks past Jack’s bedroom where the door is wide open. Everything looks the same; still warm and inviting and surprisingly tidy. The only thing that’s different is there are no more photos on the mirror. Of course Jack wouldn’t want reminders of him up on every wall. Of course he’d take them down after everything Alex did. In fact, he probably wouldn’t want Alex near his room at all, let alone staring into it feeling waves of bittersweet nostalgia that he’s still not sure he’s allowed to feel. He tears himself away from the doorway, heart pounding in his ears, and goes back to the couch.

By some miracle of timing, he gets a text from the tow truck guy saying he’ll be there in ten minutes, so Alex stands up. He wants to disappear and pretend he was never there, but more than that he wants to make sure Jack knows how sorry he is, that he’s willing to do anything to make him believe it, and mostly to let him know he never really fell out of love, not back then and not over the time they’ve been apart. Jack comes back without the mug and takes in Alex looking like he’s about to leave.

“Tow truck is almost there,” Alex says.

“I’ll drop you off,” Jack says, after a moment’s hesitation.

“You don’t have to-”

“It’s still raining, and you said you’re only a couple blocks away. It’s no big deal.”

Jack waits until they’re driving to say anything more, maybe so he knows Alex can’t physically escape. “Why did you really come over?”

It’s the simplest question he could have asked, all things considered, but it still catches Alex off guard. “I wanted to say sorry. In person. I want you to know I mean it. And I know it’s stupid to even ask, but I wanted to see if you’d be willing to give us another chance.”

Jack finds Alex’s car easily where he’d said it would be. “What’s different this time?”

If there’s one thing Alex knows about history, it’s that it repeats itself, but Alex is determined to stop it this time. He doesn’t know how, but Jack hasn’t said no, so as far as he can tell he’s on the edge of a second chance. “I won’t be afraid to tell you what I want, and I’ll try as hard as I can to make sure it’s the same as you.”

“What were you afraid of?” Jack asks. A pair of headlights shines at them as the tow truck pulls up from the opposite direction.

“That I wasn’t enough, I guess.” Alex blinks in the bright lights. He watches the faint shadows of the rain on the windshield warp Jack’s face. “So?”

“Come by the bar sometime. I don’t have an answer for you yet.”

Alex pushes the door open and heads back out into the rain to talk to the tow truck driver who looks less than thrilled to be there. Jack gives him a small wave as he drives away, and it’s not a no. It’s almost enough to pin some hope on.

-

“Lizzie, have you seen the inventory sheets anywhere? Rian needs them for the ordering tomorrow,” Jack asks his lead bartender as he steps behind the bar. He immediately ducks down to check on the shelves below the card reader since he swears he saw it there a couple days earlier when he hears a familiar giggle somewhere above him on the other side of the bar.

He quickly stands, the folder he was looking for now in hand, and feels his knees give out just slightly at the view he’s met with. “You’re back.”

“Had to come back,” Alex says, every syllable flirted. “Lizzie makes the best paloma in town.”

“Alex, please. I’m blushing,” Lizzie jokes back as she wipes down the counter. She lets out a laugh when her eyes catch Jack’s still stunned look. It’s the second time this week Alex has come to grab a drink after work. He’d been a lot more hesitant walking back into the bar earlier in the week, his nerves obvious at being back in another space that belonged to Jack. He had stayed sitting at the bar far past what Jack knows his weeknight bed time to be in order to small talk and more casually catch up while Jack organized behind the bar. Jack still hadn’t been ready to give him an answer to his question then. He wanted to be smart about this and having Alex back at the bar, smiling and telling stories from his classroom, had him so over the moon he was almost sure he was in a dream. It was one he had had numerous times in the first few weeks following the breakup. It had always been the small, casual moments with Alex that felt the biggest back then. 

Now, the more confident, easy going approach Alex seems to be taking tonight is far more like what Jack remembers Alex being like when seated at his bar, a tiny straw tucked between his lips and his legs likely swinging back and forth below the seat of his stool.

He clears his throat and leans against the counter in front of Alex. “Always in here distracting my employees.”

“Can I buy you a drink?” Alex returns while fluttering his eyelashes and leaning to rest his cheek against his palm.

Jack bites his lip as a small smile pulls at his lips. They’ve been here before. He knows what game Alex is starting and he’s not afraid to admit silently to himself this time that he’s missed being a player in it. “I literally own the place. You’d indirectly be paying me for my own drink.”

“You’re ruining my line,” Alex replies with a teasing smirk. He drums his fingers against the bartop and lifts a brow as if challenging Jack to reject his offer.

Jack lets out a short laugh and shakes his head before slipping the inventory folder under the cash drawer for Rian to get tomorrow. “Lizzie, can you get me a Tito’s on the rocks?”

The girl still standing beside him behind the bar laughs as she scoops ice into a glass before reaching for the vodka. “That going on his tab, boss?” she asks with a smile while glancing between the two of them.

“It is,” Jack answers while playfully rolling his eyes before walking around the bar to take the stool beside Alex. Instinctively, he reaches a hand up to flick at Alex’s recently bleached bangs that sit over top of the red bandana tied around his head. He thanks his bartender when she slides the drink across the counter to him and he can’t help but pinch himself again to be reminded that this is actually happening. That Alex is here, in his bar, smiling like the sun while sipping a fruity cocktail. That they might be giving this another shot.

It feels familiar and it feels good and Jack knows that they should, that they need to take this slow. That despite how serious he could tell Alex was about this last week, Jack needs to be checking in on things more often this time around to make sure he protects his heart.

“How was summer school today?” he asks before taking a sip from his glass. And then Alex turns to face him and launches into a story about trying to get teenagers to focus on the Revolutionary War when they would much rather be at a beach or the mall or anywhere that isn’t a high school classroom. He laughs along with Alex while he tells him about the elaborate excuses he gets for late homework and tries to ignore the electricity he feels run up the entire length of his body when their feet knock together below the bar.

They banter back and forth for long enough that all of Jack’s typical Thursday night patrons come and go before he even thinks to check the clock on the wall and see that it’s getting late. Once they reach a brief lull in their conversation, Jack reaches for their glasses to push toward the back of the bar to be collected by the bartender that came in to replace Lizzie.

“Are you going to be good to drive?” Jack asks as he turns back to Alex, the bright blush painted across his cheeks being the cause of the questioning.

(He wants to believe the blush is at least partially from the flirting they’d mixed into their back and forth tonight but he’s seen Alex mixed with tequila enough times to know it’s always best to check.)

“I’m just a little tipsy,” Alex says with a grateful smile while reaching for a pen to sign the receipt that’s been placed in front of him. “But I also Ubered tonight so I’ll be plenty safe.”

“I could give you a ride?” The offer leaves Jack’s lips without a second thought, his protective nature over the boy in front of him returning without a trace of hesitation.

The smile pulls further at Alex’s lips as he pulls on his denim jacket. “Sure,” he says with a nod. “If you wanted to keep me company while I grade quizzes, that could be nice too? Might help keep me awake?”

It’s a dangerous game they’re playing but Jack’s mind immediately starts wondering whether or not the bowl by the front door for keys is still the one Jack had painted at a studio on one of their earlier dates the previous fall or if Alex ever got around to alphabetizing the books on the shelves in his living room. There’s only one way to find out, Jack tells himself. And they’re bound to make it to this point again eventually, right? He had Alex back in his space last week and no kind of catastrophes occurred. 

“Let me grab my keys.”

-

The bowl sitting on the table beside the front door is the same though there’s a few more chips in it that tells him Alex is still prone to knocking it over after getting home from a night out or a shitty day at work. The cheap white wine he offers Jack once they’ve made it as far as the kitchen is also the same as well as the mug he automatically gets for Jack when he rejects the offer of wine but accepts a tea. 

Alex leaves him in the kitchen to go grab his work bag while the water boils. Jack takes a deep breath as he inspects the room, trying to note differences that show that some time has passed since the last time Jack was here. There’s some new polaroids up on the fridge, the gallery for candids usually taken during parties, of Alex and some of his coworkers. There’s a small succulent sitting on the edge of the counter that could probably use some water. A container of muffins with a heart drawn across the lid sits on the island and Jack assumes from the floral design around the edge of the clear plastic that it was likely sent home with Alex the last time he visited his parents.

Nothing is drastically different though. If Jack tried hard enough he could easily pretend no time at all has passed since the last night he drove Alex home after a night flirting across the bar. For a moment he lets his daydream run off and he can see himself trying to distract Alex while he checks his email with kisses pressed against Alex’s cheeks and fingertips drawing patterns against his shoulders left bare by whatever tank he’d thrown on practically the moment they arrived back. Jack can picture himself tripping over his own feet while shuffling through the kitchen to make them tea and he can hear Alex’s giggles at his tired movement as he pushes himself up onto the counter. He can see Alex’s rolling eyes and a smile when he finally gives up on trying to finish the last of his tea and lets Jack sleepily pull him down the hall. Jack is starting to think of kisses being pressed against the tattoo below his ear while trying to brush his teeth when present Alex walks back into the kitchen as the kettle clicks off. Present Jack remembers that he’s supposed to be taking this slow and being careful this time. (Rian would be proud Jack is remembering his words of advice given his current situation.)

“Think I’ve got that herbal tea you like if you want that,” Alex says with his back to Jack as he searches through a shelf in his pantry. Ironically, he’s changed into a faded band t-shirt cut into a tank and it’s really not helping Jack’s swirling nostalgia.

“Whatever you’ve got out already is fine,” Jack says while moving to take a spot at one of the barstools behind the counter, something about placing the structure between the two of them giving him a greater sense of control over the situation. 

Alex turns then, the familiar tea box Jack keeps on his own kitchen counter held in his hand. “Too late,” he smiles softly before turning back to the kettle and mugs. Jack watches as he moves methodically through the actions of preparing the two cups. He feels some tension he hadn’t even noticed lifting off his shoulders when he watches Alex move to the fridge and return with a couple lemon wedges and when he reaches for the bottle of honey in the spice cabinet. Because of course Alex remembers the exact way he takes his tea. He moves through the motions in the same way Jack had the night a soaked Alex had shown up at his door and he had instinctively made tea for the two of them. He feels two parts of his brain battling over the thought of how both of them kept the other’s favorite tea in their pantry, as though always wanting to be ready to welcome the other back into their spaces in a familiar fashion.

“Let me know if you want more honey,” Alex says while pushing the mug across the counter in Jack’s direction, the smile still pulling gently at his lips. Jack lifts the mug to his lips and immediately takes a sip despite knowing it’ll scald his tongue. It doesn’t need more honey because of course it doesn’t.

Jack keeps the mug close to his lips and blows cool air across the surface as he moves to take a seat on the couch. 

Alex sits in front of him on the other side of the coffee table, his laptop open to a spreadsheet beside him on the floor and a stack of the mentioned quizzes to be graded sitting on top of the table next to his own mug of tea. This exact setup crashes another similar wave of nostalgia over Jack. It had been a common occurrence for Jack to find himself on Alex’s couch to watch him grade on a Friday or Saturday night last fall after locking up at the bar. Back then he would have traded his work clothes for something comfy from Alex’s closet without thinking twice and he probably would have accepted the offered wine over a tea. It would only have been a matter of time before Jack convinced Alex to ditch his work in favor of making out on the couch until they somehow managed to drag themselves down the hall to the bedroom.

Now the other side of the coffee table feels like a mile away and Jack can’t tell if he wishes the distance were shorter or longer.

The question dancing on the tip of Jack’s tongue jumps out easily once he finally pulls his mind from the memories of how a night like this would have ended what feels like a lifetime ago. “What are we doing?”

Alex punches a number into his keyboard before looking up to meet Jack’s gaze. “What do you mean?”

“Why did you invite me over?”

Alex bites nervously at his bottom lip as his eyes look up to the ceiling. “I figured maybe we could talk? There’s only so much serious conversation that can happen when Lizzie is watching our every move.”

Jack leans forward and sets his mug against the coffee table. He folds his hands together in his lap to avoid reaching out from something else to hold on to. “Why did you end it?” he asks. He can’t help but feel annoyed at how quiet his voice sounds. “Everything was going so good, I still don’t get it.”

“I was afraid,” Alex says after a moment, his head shaking a little. “I felt like if I couldn’t keep pace with you I would just fall behind and then we’d just end up on completely different pages. It felt like I couldn’t see where we were going and I didn’t want to hurt you by questioning it.”

“So ending things altogether seemed like a better option?”

“At the time it felt inevitable. I couldn’t make sense of any other kind of ending and I didn’t want to drag it out. I know it sounds ridiculous in hindsight but that’s where I was.”

Several beats of silence pass between them. Jack runs a hand through his hair as his mind tries to make sense of what he’s being told. Before he can come up with a response, Alex takes a deep breath and speaks again, his tone more careful than before. 

“What do you need from me to consider giving us another shot?”

“I need you to be honest with me,” Jack sighs, aware that his voice sounds somewhat defeated. “I need you to tell me if you’re scared, if you want to hit the brake a little. I need you to talk to me about these things instead of running away. I wasn’t going anywhere and I would have been fine to slow down a little bit but I had no way of knowing how you were feeling.”

Alex opens his mouth as though to respond but this time Jack starts speaking again before he gets the chance. “But I also just need a little bit more time. Things were really rough for a while in the winter. You’ve gotta give me a minute to wrap my head around all of this, okay?”

Alex takes a shaky deep breath and nods slowly before picking up his red pen again. “I can do that.”

His eyes fall back to the papers in front of him and the pair of them fall back into as comfortable of a silence as they can manage, the sound of Alex’s pen against paper and his occasional typing echoing between them.

It’s maybe twenty minutes later when Jack finishes the last of his lukewarm tea and a yawn falls from his lips. He looks up when Alex quietly giggles and Jack watches as he tucks the now graded papers into a folder. “I’m going to go put these away but maybe it’s time we call it a night?”

“Think so, yeah.”

Jack watches Alex take his things in the direction of his bedroom and he pulls himself off the couch. He collects their mugs and takes them to the sink, quickly rinsing them and placing them in the dishwasher before heading to the entryway.

“You kept the bandana,” Jack states when he hears footsteps approach behind him while he’s pulling on his shoes by the front door, very aware that Alex is still watching his every move. 

“What?” Alex asks. Jack finishes with his laces and turns to face him again while leaning against the door, his hand absentmindedly reaching for his keys in the bowl.

“That bandana you gave me so we could match,” Jack explains, his fingers nervously playing with his keychain. He should have just left it, no point in bringing this up now, probably. “In that box you gave the most random shit back to me, even a ripped up picture, which I sort of thought was against your religion or something. But you kept that.”

Alex takes a couple steps toward him and Jack feels his back press further against the door, his body instinctively still trying to put some distance between them. “Honestly, it’s probably still in my car. I think I got so used to seeing it in there, I forgot it didn’t technically belong to me anymore.”

“But you remembered the pack of gum definitely wasn’t yours?” Jack says, his voice just barely teasing.

“I think it’s been well established I wasn’t in the best state of mind at that point,” Alex says with a sad smile pulling at one corner of his mouth. He looks down at the ground and sighs. “Do you want it back?”

Jack shakes his head with a short laugh. “No, don’t worry about it. I was just always curious about that. It’s okay.” 

He watches Alex nod and play with the hem of his shirt. Jack reaches for his jacket and pulls it on before turning to unlock the door. “I’ll see you around soon, Alex.”

“G’night, Jack. Drive safe.”

-

Alex is sitting cross-legged on Jack's desk, waiting for Jack to get back from whatever meeting he was at. He hadn't told him there even was a meeting, but he’d had no reason to. Alex showing up at the bar is still new and sporadic enough that Jack shouldn't be able to predict his moves, and maybe that's how Alex likes it for now, even if it has left him a little bored. He'd walked in to see a party happening, and if Lizzie hadn't been behind the bar he's sure he would have been sent home. The place is currently being taken over by people in formal outfits for some kind of private event. There wasn't a sign anywhere saying what the occasion was. Lizzie had made him a vodka soda on the house and sent him into Jack's office to wait for him, saying he should be back in around fifteen minutes. That had been fifteen minutes ago.

He had started on Jack's spinny chair, and then he'd almost knocked a decorative glass bottle off a shelf by accidentally spinning into it. Therefore: on the desk. He's entertaining himself on his phone for the most part, even though school has left him a little stressed and he would love to be at home unwinding somewhere he can stretch out. The floor is starting to look inviting. He also has a quiz to write for next week, and since summer school moves faster than the regular semester he can't just reuse an old quiz. It shouldn't take that much effort, and yet he's been splitting his attention between his phone and a little dinosaur planter sitting on the shelf that isn't the one he almost knocked over.

 -

Alex hadn’t known what to expect from the moment they’d pulled into the parking lot of the strip mall. The only place here that had made an ounce of sense for a date had felt like the pizza place at the end of the strip, but they were parked far enough away that that felt improbable. He got out of the car slowly as Jack grabbed something from the back seat that turned out to be wine. The sign on the window said BYOB so at least one of them was prepared. Alex looked up. The Clayhouse. He wouldn’t have guessed Jack was this artsy, but he wasn’t about to turn down an afternoon with Jack and a bottle of red.

“A dinosaur?” Jack asked, laughter playing in his voice even if he wasn't laughing out loud. “Are you five years old?”

“I think he's cute.” Alex hadn't been set on that specific planter, but if Jack was making a big deal out of it, it had to be that one. Looking over the ones nearby – a hedgehog, a llama, a turtle – the dinosaur was the only one that made sense. All the other pottery options were very... grown up. There were some beautiful examples of artistically painted plates and bowls around the front desk, but he knew his skill level and it was not that. Jack had picked a bowl though, and Alex was intrigued by how that would turn out, especially after they uncorked their wine.

 Messy, was the answer.

“Don't laugh at me!” Jack said, wiping blue paint off his arms from tipping over his whole tray of paints onto the table. In his meticulous painting of his dinosaur's eyes and smile, Alex had missed the process, but somehow blue was the only color that got on Jack. The rest of the colors – and there were many colors – were slowly spreading across the table. Alex kept laughing as he got up to grab more paper towels before the paint creeped close enough to the edge of the table to drip off.

“I'm not,” Alex said, though he was biting back more laughter behind his grin. He wiped up the majority of the paint. The rest of it looked like it would stay on the table.

Jack sighed. “Did I get it all?” he asked, twisting his arms around.

Alex tilted his head. “There's still blue up there, behind your elbow.” He watched for a moment as Jack tried to wipe it off, but he must not have been able to see it because he managed to swipe at every bit of his upper arm except that one spot. “Let me get it.” Jack stilled the second Alex grabbed his arm. Alex got the paint off and then suddenly noticed how close their faces were, the way as soon as he looked at Jack's eyes he almost forgot to breathe, how he could smell the wine on Jack's breath, not to mention he was still holding Jack's arm.

“Is it gone?” Jack asked sort of quietly.

Alex glanced down and back up, taking a small step backwards but not letting go. “Um, yeah, you're not blue anymore.”

Jack lowered his arm out of Alex's grip. “Thanks.”

Alex cleared his throat. “What happened?”

Jack shook his head. “I almost dipped my brush in my drink, and then went to dip it in the water and almost knocked that over, and then knocked the paint over instead.”

“You've had one glass, how are you that clumsy? Or is that your natural state? I'm learning so much about you.” Alex grinned as Jack looked increasingly embarrassed.

“I'm not that much of a lightweight, give me some credit.”

“So you're just uncoordinated?”

“You tell me.” Jack gestured to the bowl in front of him. It was painted in uneven stripes going all around it, with a yellow splatter on one side where the spilled paint had hit it. The inside was still a blank canvas.

“That doesn't make you uncoordinated,” Alex said. “That just makes you bad at painting.” He watched Jack's face as he looked from the bowl to the half-painted dinosaur. “You know, I don't really understand your date logic. Why this? Because if you're trying to impress me with your painting skills...”

Jack laughed and picked up his drink. “No, my painting skills are not impressive. But movie dates are boring early on and I don't know what food you like yet so I didn't want to take you to dinner.”

“All true.” Alex picked up his glass too, sipping his drink at the same time as Jack. “You know what I am impressed by? This wine.”

Jack's smile grew.

“You brought me here to show off your taste in wine?”

“Well you've seen the bar and I didn't want to invite you over to my place on a second date to look like I'm trying to get you drunk—”

“For the record, I'd be okay with that.” Alex peered at Jack over the rim of his glass.

Jack looked at him curiously before continuing. “I drive past this place all the time when I go to get brunch with my friends, that’s how I knew about it. And it gives us something to do while we talk.”

“You really thought this through.”

“Some would say I thought about it too much.”

“Are ‘some’ your brunch friends? Fuck them. This place is fun, they’re missing out.”

Jack had stopped after one glass, not that Alex had noticed, so they took the rest of the bottle home along with their painted creations. Alex had them cradled carefully in his lap in the car so they wouldn’t fall and break. To his surprise, Jack didn’t drop Alex off but drove them to his own house where the bottle was reopened, and he asked Alex if there were any foods he didn’t like before ordering Italian. Over pasta and garlic bread, they agreed that Jack would keep the dinosaur and Alex would take the bowl with him. Alex took the bowl and as many wine-tinted kisses as he could before he got a ride home. The bowl had ended up on the table just inside his door where he usually tossed his keys and wallet. He’d never thought that table needed anything, but somehow Jack had filled in a gap he hadn’t been aware of. He did that more often than Alex had realized at the time, which explained the way he’d felt like his world was falling apart at the seams as soon as Jack wasn’t there holding it together. There was no reason for Alex to stick around, but there was nothing else he wanted to look for anymore.

The office door swings open and Alex’s attention is finally pulled from the dinosaur. The leafy plant growing out of it is nice and green, and bigger than Alex remembers it.

“Hey,” Jack says, surprised. “What are you doing here?”

Alex shrugs. “Wanted to hang out, but there was a party so Lizzie put me in here. She didn’t tell you I was here?”

“She was busy with the party. Why are you sitting on the desk and not the chair?”

“I almost knocked stuff over, but everything is fine.”

Jack looks around the room, probably making sure everything really is fine. “Well I wasn’t planning on staying long since Lizzie has the party under control. What were you staring at? You look… dazed.”

“Just… thinking about the dinosaur.”

Jack nods slowly. There’s not much else to say about that. And if Jack is going home soon, Alex doesn’t want to invite himself along, and he’s in no position to try and keep Jack here no matter how much he wants to break through whatever walls Jack still has up. He knows better than to try to rush it. He just has to keep asking for bricks until there are none left between them. “Rian didn’t know it was from you, or he would have sent it back with the rest of your stuff he pulled out of my closet.” He doesn’t ask Alex to move from his desk so Alex decides to stay until Jack leaves, or asks him to.

Alex thinks briefly about the box that had been left on his porch the day after he’d sent some random assortment of Jack’s things back to him. There was no reason for him to have been so cruel in hindsight, considering most of his memory ties to Jack were and still are stacked in a box that he’d almost sharpied a label onto, but he hadn’t known what to call it. There hadn’t been a way to make the breakup seem more official, he’d thought, than giving Jack back his things. Rian had returned masses more, answering Alex’s unasked question of where half his wardrobe had disappeared to.

He fiddles with his phone in his hands as he watches Jack put away papers and whatnot from his meeting. “You wouldn't believe how close I came to calling you on your birthday.”

Jack looks at Alex like he's speaking nonsense.

“Still birth-month though. Little late for birth-week.”

“Why didn't you?”

“I—” Alex almost spills that he turned his phone off the whole day so he wouldn't be tempted. “I didn't know if you'd want to hear from me, especially on your birthday. And I was scared. That if I called and you ignored me that I'd just never try again.”

“You don't have a very clear idea of the way you left me,” Jack says matter-of-factly.

“I mean, you took down the pictures on your mirror so I'm starting to get an idea.”

“Actually I burned them.”

If Alex's mind was a car on a track, that car just hit the brakes hard. “Oh.” He's emptied of words to say, as if he wasn't already reaching for small talk. He's never known conversation with Jack to be so stilted; from their first exchange it had been nothing but flowing back-and-forth which led easily to open heart-to-hearts. He's also never known Jack to get rid of mementos. He wasn't as bad as Alex, who still holds onto receipts from places he goes that mean anything to him, but those weren't just pieces of paper. They were gifts. Which means either Jack had no idea what it meant for Alex to give them to him at all, or… “I never meant for those to end up being painful. I know that's not fair, and don't get me wrong I know I have no right to feel anything about it, but I- I'm sorry.”

“In my defense, I didn't think we'd be back here.” Jack has a smile playing around his lips, and Alex feels better knowing he isn't making him feel guilty about it. Alex can't imagine how bad it must have felt for Jack to end up burning those pictures. He hadn't assumed the breakup was easy on either of them, but walking away from Jack always felt like the worst decision he'd ever made from the second he did it. It felt like the biggest injustice to think that Jack had felt anywhere near as bad as he had, or worse. “I’m gonna head out.” Jack pushes the drawer shut.

Something is falling just out of reach and Alex doesn’t know what it is but he knows he can’t let it go now. He swings his legs over the edge of the desk. “Happy birth-month.” Tries for a hopeful smile. "Thirty-three looks good on you."

Jack quirks an eyebrow, one hand on the doorknob, like he’s not sure where this is going. Fuck if Alex knows either. “Thanks.”

Alex wishes he knew how to handle being in the same space as Jack again. He wants to tear through the awkwardness by saying he owes Jack a present and then kissing him like they’d never missed a beat. “I’ll walk you out.”

“It’s my bar.”

“And I’m being a gentleman and walking you out.” Alex hops off the desk and waits for Jack to open the door. Jack gives him an extended look of confusion before pulling the door open. Once it’s locked, they wave goodbye to Lizzie, who’s still on the floor with the party guests.

Outside, Alex realizes he doesn’t have his car since he’d showed up planning on staying long enough to have a few drinks. He follows Jack to his car, trying to figure out whether Jack will offer to drive him home or if he should inconspicuously try to call a ride. Jack answers his question when he already has his door open before asking, “Are you getting in?”

“Are you offering me a ride?”

“That or I’m kidnapping you in broad daylight.”

“I guess that’s a risk I’m willing to take.”

-

Alex was sitting at the bar, swinging his legs back and forth to the music. It was considerably louder than it had been when there were customers, but Jack had locked the front door and told him to stay put so he could finish cleaning up. The nights when he had to lock up alone were rare, but Alex never minded staying longer. If he was more sober he might have been helping. But Jack had assured him that the best thing for him to do was not try and help, which was fair enough after the glass incident last time. Alex maintained that it wasn’t a big deal and no one was injured but Jack seemed to remember it differently.

So he was controlling the playlist, and as soon as the freshly mopped floor was dry he was up and dancing to the pop music he’d chosen. Jack kept looking up from cleaning and restocking under the bar and whatever else he was doing to give him very endeared looks, but it wasn’t as sweet as it ideally could have been.

“Come dance with me,” Alex said, leaning on the bar and giving Jack his best pout.

“I’m almost done and then we can go home and dance.”

“You’re boring at work, you know that?” Alex bounced his head to the beat and watched Jack roll his eyes fondly.

“You’re literally a history teacher. You wouldn’t dance at work.”

“Lucky you can’t visit me at work and prove it.” Alex started singing along with the chorus, hitting the harmony as he got back into dancing. Jack was still watching him with a smile, so Alex, still singing, went behind the bar and grabbed his hands.

“What are you doing?” Jack laughed. Alex didn’t stop singing. He swung their arms in a motion as close to dancing as he can manage without Jack’s participation. “I only have a couple more things to do and we can lock up.” Jack’s logic was taking them nowhere, so he gave in and let Alex dance him around for the rest of the song. Alex didn’t know how he did it, but right as the song ended Jack got him back into his seat, letting go of his hands and kissing his forehead before he went back to work.

Alex sat there and let himself just watch Jack work through cleaning the soda guns like it was all routine, and it was, and he’d been given a nice little spot in this world Jack had built for himself and cared about so much. He sighed a little, coming down from the burst of dancing energy. He reached over to grab his camera and snapped a picture. Jack didn’t even look up at the flash anymore, but he smiled to himself as Alex waited for the picture to print. He held it close as the colors set in. The bar was dark but Jack lit up the photo as much as he lit up the room. The music cut off suddenly and Alex looked up.

“Told you I was almost done,” Jack said, pulling his office door closed. He pulled on his coat and waited for Alex to do the same.

“You could have let the song finish.”

“I thought you were in a hurry to leave?”

“I was in a hurry to spend more time with you. We can do that here.”

Jack grabbed Alex’s coat and put it around his shoulders. “Or we can go home where it’s warmer.” He handed Alex his camera. “And there’s more room for dancing.”

-

Alex looks down at the box. He’s put a lid on it, but it doesn’t stop the feeling of homesickness overflowing from it. It’s sitting at the base of his throat like a cry that refuses to come out. It’s his own fault and he knows it. He knows the way he felt that night could have stretched out forever, and that’s almost worse than knowing their relationship might have had an expiration date. He can only reason so much that it was for the best, but if that was true he wouldn’t feel so broken. He wouldn’t feel like separating Jack from the rest of his memories was the same as trying to surgically remove him from his life. He wouldn’t be surprised if Jack hated him now.

He opens the box without looking into it and pulls out the very last photo. It’s all he can do not to look at Jack’s smiling face before he tears it in two, and then tears those halves into even smaller pieces until he’s left with the saddest pile of confetti to ever exist.

-

There was no good reason for the twinge of nerves he felt in his stomach when Jack had whispered that he hoped the new year was the start of forever for them. He knew they’d only been together for five months, and he knew with nearly as much certainty that Jack knew that too. He also knew he loved Jack more than he’d loved probably anyone ever, so why did Jack cementing that make him so uneasy? It was uncomfortably similar to the way he’d felt a few weeks ago when Jack had met his parents at his birthday, the way he’d fit in so seamlessly without Alex having to so much as facilitate an awkward conversation between the four of them. He’d told himself then not to follow that feeling, because there was no way it would lead anywhere good. He wasn’t sober enough to be second guessing himself now, but he also usually tried not to let himself dwell on the feeling so maybe now was the time.

Jack had given an enthusiastic and mostly comprehensible toast right before midnight. They all counted down and then right before kissing him, Jack had leaned over like he was telling him a secret. Alex’s nerves had been doing little circus tricks ever since. Luckily Alex wasn’t nearly the furthest gone, and then Jack was playfully yelling at Rian to get his dirty shoes off his bar. Rian complied by kicking off his shoes in two different directions, and then he pulled Jack up with him. Jack didn’t bother taking his shoes off. Rian gave another shout for a happy new year and everyone else cheered in return as he smacked a kiss on Jack’s lips. Jack shoved him away. They were both laughing.

“You okay?” Lizzie asked, appearing next to Alex. “Don’t go getting jealous or anything, they’re always like that.”

“No, I know,” Alex said. He took a sip of his drink, eyes still on Jack.

“I know the whole cliché about bartenders being therapists is fake but I’ve been told I’m a good listener.”

Alex considered it. The last thing he needed was to pull one of Jack’s employees into the middle of whatever storm was brewing in his mind. Not to mention, it wasn’t her responsibility to reassure him about anything. If he was so concerned, he could have a mature conversation with Jack later when they were alone. He looked over at her and she raised her eyebrows expectantly, bringing her straw up to her mouth. “It’s nothing,” he said finally. “Late night for someone who’s used to getting up at six for school.”

She didn’t seem convinced but thankfully didn’t press him on it.

 Later showed up sooner than Alex expected, when Jack pulled him into his office and shut the door. He was almost expecting to be shoved against the door, but Jack just wrapped his arms around Alex’s neck and hung off of him. Alex laughed a little even though he was getting slightly more nervous by the second just thinking about bringing up anything. Jack started pressing kisses up his chest to his neck and Alex decided that it was not the time for talking about anything serious.

“Thanks for not abandoning me to deal with my drunk ass employees all by myself,” Jack said when his wandering lips reached Alex’s ear.

“How was I supposed to kiss you at midnight if we went to different parties?” Alex joked. The music was still loud through the door, and he could have sworn it was getting louder.

“You didn’t save me from a kiss from Rian though.”

“No one told you to climb on the bar.”

“You didn’t stop me.”

“Like I could have stopped you.”

“Fair enough.” Jack kissed the spot right behind Alex’s ear.

“Jack—”

“I really love you, you know that?”

Any doubts on the tip of his tongue ran straight back inside. “I love you too,” he said easily. With the way he could feel himself overthinking everything else, he was glad there was at least one thing about them that’s solid. He couldn’t talk himself out of loving Jack, even if everything about them staying together scared him more than he’s willing to admit.

Alex went home the next day with two different pictures of the night. One was a group shot of everyone in their glittery party regalia that nearly everyone there took a photo of on their phones to post online later, and the second was from after they’d stumbled back to Jack’s house. They were lying in Jack’s bed, and Jack looked like a hangover waiting to happen, but Alex managed to keep their eyes open long enough for him to snap a picture of them cuddled together, Jack’s face half buried in Alex’s shoulder. He hadn’t waited to look at the photo before turning the lights out and falling asleep right there with Jack’s arm across his chest. The next morning, the photo was on the bedside table right beside his camera, kicking that cloyingly familiar twist back into his stomach.

Jack was still asleep when he tucked the photo into his jacket pocket so he wouldn’t forget to take it home with him. Alex had almost wanted to run out right there, but Jack deserved better than that. So they woke up and Alex pretended everything was fine as they went through the motions of breakfast, albeit much slower than usual. Jack had to go back to the bar that afternoon to look over the disaster zone they’d left behind, and Alex frankly needed more time to nurse his hangover, so they’d parted ways at Jack’s front door. He was bemoaning his headache at home over greasy fast food when he reached into his pocket and really looked at the picture for the first time. He couldn’t describe the feeling that washed over him. It was almost regret, except he knew that it wasn’t Jack he was regretting. It was just the feeling that now’s his chance to turn back.

-

Alex has always been able to make do with a general idea of when things happened in his life. It’s the reason he’s never bothered with labelling the boxes that he puts all his polaroids in. It usually doesn’t line up as one box per year, or one stack per month, or any other significant measure of time. Every now and then there will be a photo from a birthday or other event that works as a marker for the passage of time. Nothing has ever felt important enough to keep close track of. He’s never been part of anything world-changing or even life-changing that felt like it needed a date written on it to remember it happened. That is, until Jack.

He hasn’t been writing dates on all his pictures with Jack, but as soon as he’s gone two weeks without seeing him, knowing that he’s going out of his way to avoid seeing him again, it’s making him think maybe it’s time to start sorting his photos a little better. As soon as he’s home from grocery shopping, he drops the bags on the kitchen counter and goes straight to his bedroom closet. He pulls out the most recent box and knows just based on the pictures at the top of each little stack which ones were taken after he met Jack. He pulls them all out and sets them on his dresser until he finds an empty box to put them all into. They have to be separate. It gnaws at him that it feels more like a gesture of Before and After than just trying to isolate one person from his memories, as if it’ll help him forget and move on.

He does his best not to dwell on any particular pictures as he moves them around, but glimpses of moments flash before his eyes before he can stop them. Pictures of dates, of wine-drunk after-midnights, and more than he would care to admit of Jack only seconds before a flash went off to make him aware of Alex taking the picture. The one on top of the last stack isn’t the most recent picture, but it might as well be the last good one. It’s the last one he can remember taking before the feeling of being pulled too tight started being a constant in his life. He’s considered that he could have just talked to Jack about it, but there’s only so much Jack could have said or done to help. If Jack had held him tighter, he would have felt more constricted, and if Jack had given him space, they would have ended up exactly where they are now, as far apart as they can be without one of them leaving town.

-

Jack’s friends were still a few minutes away when Alex asked their server for four mimosas since he could practically feel Jack’s nerves from where he sat beside him. Alex sighed a gentle laugh and placed a hand on Jack’s bouncing knee as his head dropped to rest on Jack’s shoulder. “You good, babe?”

“Great, yeah,” Jack responded, though it sounded like he was further away than right beside Alex in the booth they were seated at just a few minutes earlier. He glanced around the restaurant, his eyes moving across everything in the room aside from Alex. His face scrunched up some as though he were trying to study the vintage posters and signs on the walls. All Alex could do was laugh. 

“Oh my god, you’re nervous about introducing your friends to the boyfriend,” he laughed, his tone gentle but teasing. He lifted his head and sat up while he turned in his seat to face him better. Jack bit his bottom lip against the small smile that pulled at his lips as he looked down at his lap, a bright blush painting it’s way across his cheeks. Whether it was from being called out on the cause of his nerves or Alex’s use of a title that had only been established a few days earlier, he couldn’t tell.

“You’re the first guy I’ve ever brought to Sunday brunch, okay?” he mumbled, his right hand moving to cover Alex’s still placed comfortingly on his knee. Alex caught on easily and turned his hand to tangle their fingers together before letting their joined hands rest against Jack’s thigh. “This is a very sacred tradition. We’ve been doing it since college. It’s a big deal that they suggested you come along.”

Alex smiled and squeezed their palms together. “Then I’m honored,” he said before leaning over to press a kiss against the corner of Jack’s lips. “Now relax. This’ll be good practice for meeting the parents.”

Jack sat up then and laughed. “Meeting the parents will be a breeze. My mom is probably already picking out color palettes for the rehearsal dinner.”

Alex mentally brushed away the spiral his mind started to form at the mention of a wedding in any form and winked at Jack. “I can practically hear my mother arguing with florists.”

Jack’s face lit up with another bright laugh and then mimosas were being placed in front of them and thoughts of a future beyond the meal they’re about to have were forgotten. They had each only just taken their first sip when Rian and Zack stepped up to the table. Alex stood and extended a hand out to Zack. “Hey man, nice to meet you, I’m Alex.”

Zack returned the handshake and smiled. “Same to you, I’m Zack.”

“And good to see you, Rian,” Alex said with a grin as they all moved to sit. 

“Wait, you guys know each other already?” Jack asked while gesturing between Rian and Alex. Alex couldn’t help but giggle as Rian rolled his eyes. 

“Jack, we literally work in the same place,” he started before pausing to take a sip from his drink. “And he is sitting at the bar making tequila heart eyes at you like, at least two nights a week. You really thought I would never introduce myself to someone my friend was obviously dating?”

Jack blushed again before grumbling a quiet fair enough into his mimosa. Alex chuckled and turned to press his lips against Jack’s shoulder. “Don’t worry,” Alex said. “I wasn’t too drunk the night he decided to say hello. And Lizzie had my back to let him know that I don’t suck.”

Their server arrived at their table then to get everyone’s order (though really just Alex’s since the other three were there enough that they greeted the blushing teenage girl by name as she walked up with a pen and pad ready). The conversation flowed easily among them. Jack and Rian bounced off of each other as they told funny stories from things at the bar that week while Zack talked about the people he saw pass through the ER the night before which prompted Alex to ask a dozen or so questions about nursing (listen it’s never too late for a career change, guys, I’m curious). When prompted, Alex groaned briefly about grading essays and exams. Fall break was about to end for the kids so he hadn’t seen much of the world beyond his apartment walls while grading midterms for the last week.

As they started sipping on their second round of mimosas, Alex noticed Jack relax beside him and smiled when an arm was thrown around his waist and Jack’s head settled against his shoulder. He felt like he might actually fit in with Jack's friends, all of them still laughing easily over their drinks, until Rian turned to him.

“So what are your intentions with Jack?”

“Uh,” Alex said, feeling like he was getting too much attention all of a sudden.

Jack groaned and rolled his eyes. “We're gonna get married and have fifteen kids, is that what you want to hear?” He looked up at Alex through his lashes. “Ignore him.”

“Good,” Rian said. “I've always wanted to be an uncle.”

“We’ll try not to disappoint you on that then,” Alex replied, the smooth nature of his words influenced by the floatiness he felt from the drinks. “We’re having fun right now. That’s what’s most important.”

“Happy for you two,” Zack smiled at the pair of them. “It’s been awhile since we’ve seen this one so happy with someone.”

“Hush, you guys are worse than when my mom calls,” Jack groaned, though his appreciation at their comments didn’t go unnoticed by Alex. He sat up then, his arm still secured around Alex’s waist as he lifted his other arm to get the attention of their server. “Are we still watching the game at my place after this?”

-

Alex hadn’t considered when he started weaving his days with Jack’s life that it would be hard to pull the threads apart. If he’d let himself think about them beyond the next date, he’s sure there wouldn’t have been so much to untangle. Because there wouldn’t have been more than one date to speak of.

But he’d stopped counting dates, stopped counting days and weeks, and the only reason he could keep track of time with Jack at all was through school deadlines and holidays. He’d cleared photos off his dresser more often than usual, and every time he gave Jack a photo to keep, it felt like an accomplishment. He’d finally found someone who understood his weird mnemonic device despite having a pretty good memory – he does teach history after all. Jack hadn’t made a big deal of it so Alex hadn’t either, but Alex knows one of the photos lives – lived – in Jack’s wallet. The rest of them had started to frame the mirror in Jack’s bedroom. It was cute in the same way as Jack’s bartenders knowing his drink order based on the day of the week.

It’s a Saturday, and if Jack hasn’t changed his work schedule, Jack should not be at the bar that night unless there’s a special event, which there doesn’t seem to be based on the noise. Alex is not planning on drinking, and if he so much as sees Jack’s shadow he is getting right back into his car and driving in whichever direction he sees first. Jack had “promoted” Rian to weekend manager back near the end of fall, when he figured out it would line their free time up more without having to take time off sporadically. Alex hopes he hasn’t redone his schedule since.

He walks into the bar and it looks startlingly familiar. He doesn’t know why he felt like it would look different, but the tables and barstools are all exactly where they’ve always been. The only thing that’s different is Rian staring at him blankly, which is less terrifying than if he was glaring, and then Zack on the other side of the bar, jaw hanging open like the two of them were in the middle of a conversation.

Alex feels like he’s being pinned down by their eyes on him so he takes a step forward so he’s out of the doorway. He knows this isn’t a bad idea, and that as much as Jack’s friends are protective of him they’ve never been mean to Alex so at the very least anything they do to him will be justified. The thought is almost scarier than Rian’s stare. Alex takes a quick look around, mostly checking to make sure the lights are off in Jack’s office.

“He’s not here,” Rian says. Alex relaxes a little, which takes Rian from emotionless to confused. “Can I get you something?”

“Preferably to-go?” Zack says under his breath, and Rian pretends not to laugh.

“No, I… no.”

“Okay?” Rian says slowly. He keeps watching Alex. It’s unsettling. Alex feels like he should say something, but there’s no precedent for what to say to your ex’s best friends when you walk into their space unannounced less than a week after showing up on said ex’s doorstep in a thunderstorm. Alex doesn’t know if they even know about that, although it’s a safe bet that they do.

“You wanna sit down?” Zack says after an awkward amount of time. Rian gives him a look and Zack shrugs like he couldn’t think of anything better to say.

Alex walks up to the bar slowly and sits down, leaving a seat empty between himself and Zack.

Rian leans against the bar and fully stares Alex down. “What are you doing here?”

“Maybe I missed you,” Alex says, faking a smile. It works a little, because Rian snorts a laugh.

“We heard about your little car mishap last week,” Rian says.

“Yeah, bad timing.”

“Must’ve been, for you to go to Jack’s house instead of waiting in your car for a tow truck like a normal person. Don’t say you happened to be close by, you live halfway across town. What are you doing?” Alex feels like he should clarify that it had only been drizzling when he’d gotten out of his car, but that’s not the point he’s supposed to be making. “And don’t say you missed him. That’s not on him.”

Alex wishes he had a drink as an excuse to not talk, but instead they’re both still staring at him, waiting for him to answer. “I made a mistake.”

Zack frowns slightly. “Which was?”

“Breaking up with him.”

Zack and Rian exchange a look. “That doesn’t explain why you’re here,” Rian pushes.

“I want to apologize. To Jack. And to you for asking for your advice on how to get him back.”

Zack laughs. “You want us to give you advice?”

Rian shakes his head. “You didn’t ask for our input before breaking his heart, what’s different now?” There’s that question again. “If we told you to go back to his front door with a diamond ring, would you do it?”

“No, but only because I know it wouldn’t work.”

“Sounds like you don’t need our advice,” Zack says.

“I’m not going to go behind his back and tell you anything you don’t already know,” Rian says. “But he told you he hasn’t decided yet. Start there.”

He has no more answers than he arrived with, but it’s a good sign that Rian didn’t throw him out on sight, or that Zack didn’t physically throw him out as Alex knows he is fully capable of doing.

“You’re right, Jack’s more a flash mob guy than a diamond ring anyway,” Zack says. “He likes music more than shiny things.”

“Yeah, a flash mob or one of those planes that writes things in the sky?”

“Write him a song.”

“Buy him a new car.”

“What about a hot air balloon ride?”

Alex nods and stands up. “Nice to know I’m not rich enough to date either of you.”

“In your dreams,” Rian says.

Alex catches them exchanging another look as he turns to leave, and maybe he’s just hopeful but it looks a lot less unfriendly.

-

Jack knew he wasn’t going to get any more work done as soon as Alex walked in. He’d made a valiant effort for almost five minutes, but he could see Alex through his little window getting more and more antsy. He’d let Alex have a few drinks, and then let Alex’s fingers dance across his legs as he tried harder and harder to remember he was still at work, even if he clearly wasn’t working. His bartender, bless her, who also happened to be the manager that night, was doing her best to pretend she wasn’t eavesdropping even though she definitely was.

Eventually, Alex brought up that he couldn’t drive back home, and Jack took the opportunity to offer to drive him, which was why he was standing outside with Alex all but hanging off him as he patted down his pockets and realized his keys must still be in his office. Alex pouted when Jack told him to wait a minute, but he wasn’t driving without keys and Alex isn’t driving at all so he didn’t have much of a choice.

He hurriedly grabbed his keys off his desk and locked his office door behind him. He was about to let Lizzie know she needed to lock up when she leaves but she was one step ahead.

“So boss, you got a crush?” Lizzie raised her eyebrows and shot a look toward the door. “Who’s the guy?”

She’d been listening to them flirt all night, but Jack could feel his face getting warmer anyway. “Can I get away with playing dumb?”

“Try me.”

“What guy?”

“Not that dumb.”

Jack laughed nervously. “He came in a couple weeks ago when you were out sick.”

“Oh nice, I did you a favor then. Can I say you owe me one?”

“I think I did you a favor by providing entertainment for half your shift.”

She smiled and shook her head. “He’s cute. Touchy drunk though. I wonder what tequila would do to him instead of whiskey.”

“Goodnight,” Jack said pointedly as he left.

As soon as he was out the door, Alex was back at his side.

-

Jack is more familiar than he should be with this situation. Lizzie still seems to think they’re cute and that Alex looks like he’s trying, but Rian keeps telling him to be careful, and it’s not helpful that Zack is trying to be impartial but is clearly also on Rian’s side. He can’t blame them for it. They saw him at his worst just as much as he did. Almost.

Alex closes his door and looks over at Jack as he puts the car in reverse. “You don’t have to keep driving me home. Not that I don’t want you to, but you don’t have to keep going out of your way if you don’t want to.”

“I’d call you an Uber myself if I hated driving you home,” Jack says. It’s somewhat of a bar rule so that everyone leaves safely, but Alex would have ended up being the exception even if it wasn’t a standard. Besides, over the last couple weeks every time Alex has come in he’s let his walls down just a little more, as if Jack isn’t the only one getting used to the idea of them spending time together again.

Alex smiles a little as they pull out of the parking lot. They let the music fill the space for most of the drive until they get to the last light before Alex gets out. “I can tell you what’s different this time,” Alex says. Cars are driving across the intersection, heading a lot more places than anyone would expect this late at night. Jack isn’t watching the cars as much as watching the lights reflect off them as they pass. He turns a little toward Alex to show he’s listening. “My therapist says I need to stop trying to control how things are going to turn out because it’s impossible to know what’s going to happen all the time, and worrying about it is only going to make me too stressed to pay attention to things in real time. That I can’t stop caring just because it might not last forever. And then my mom told me I was stupid to let you go just because I was scared.”

Jack doesn’t realize the light has turned green until the car behind him honks. He swears he’s a better driver when Alex isn’t sitting beside him being distracting. He doesn’t know what to respond to first, but he takes the easy bait. “Your mom was right.”

“She was. They both were.” Alex pauses as Jack pulls up to the curb. “I don’t know why my reaction to being scared to lose you was to break up with you but I won’t do it again. If, you know. But I have to know, can you give us another chance? I know you said you needed time, but—”

“Okay.” Jack says it before he can stop himself but he doesn’t want to take it back. Alex snaps his head up to look at him. It’s not like Jack hasn’t been on the verge of giving him a second chance for weeks, but it does feel different all of a sudden, fuck what Rian thinks. It doesn’t feel like falling, it almost feels like butterflies.

“Really?” Alex says, expression caught between disbelief and almost too hopeful. Jack knows the feeling.

Jack nods and feels his growing smile mirroring Alex’s in the orange of the street lights.

“Are we starting over?”

“I don’t think we have to start over, just…”

“Slower?”

If they’re already back to finishing each other’s sentences, then slower is going to take a while for them to figure out.

“So you still have Sundays off? How about dinner?”

“Don’t you have school on Monday?”

“Why do you make it sound like I’m a student?” Alex asks childishly. “It gives us a reason to have an early night. A cutoff point.”

“Your bedtime.”

“A boundary. For starting slower.” Alex smiles.

Jack isn’t surprised by how thoughtful Alex is being without really having a conversation about it, but it’s reassuring to feel like he’s not starting another series of mistakes. “Are you cooking?”

“Only if you bring the wine.”

“Oh I see, you’re just using me for my connections.”

“Always have been,” Alex says, laughing when Jack does. He pushes his door open and then pauses and turns around. Leaning over the center console, he kisses Jack on the cheek, barely catching the corner of his mouth. He leans back, blushing slightly, but Jack reaches out and pulls him back in for a real kiss. It’s not exactly moving slow for them to be kissing like this before their first date, but Jack couldn’t care less with how much he’s missed Alex.

Alex pulls back to catch his breath and lets out a shaky laugh. “Is that a preview of Sunday?”

“If you’re lucky,” Jack says. Alex leans in for one last kiss, quick and sweet, before getting out of the car. “I’ll see you then.”

“If you’re lucky,” Alex repeats with a smile.

-

Alex is dancing around the kitchen in an apron, using a spatula in the place of a microphone, when Jack arrives on Sunday night.

He’s let himself up per Alex’s request with a bottle of wine and a bouquet of peonies. He leans against the counter and listens to Alex sing along to some pop song he likely learned from his students. He probably could have gone on watching for longer but then the song changes and Alex’s hilarious dance moves with it and Jack can’t help but laugh. Alex spins around then, his cheeks a bright red and his bottom lip pulled between his teeth. 

“Enjoying the show?” Alex asks, his sarcasm flowing, as he drops a hand to his hip and points his spatula microphone in Jack’s direction. 

“Excellent dinner entertainment,” Jack says with a smile. “Ten out of ten.”

“You’re a brat.”

Jack laughs brightly. “Yes, but I am a brat with the wine,” he says, and points in the direction of the drawer beside the sink. “You still keep your corkscrew in the same place?”

Alex nods. “Yep, and I’ll grab glasses.”

Jack opens the bottle and pours them each a generous glass of the red he spent far too long deciding on at the liquor store the night before. They catch up on how their weeks have gone since they last saw each other. Jack tells a story about some bachelor party he had to kick out on Friday night while Alex finishes the pasta thing he’s decided on making tonight. Alex talks about the truly ridiculous things he’s read in his student’s essays on World War II. 

Their banter and jokes come back without any hesitation and Jack can’t help the smile that’s been spread across his face since walking through the door a couple hours earlier because he forgot how easy it was with Alex. How even on days when all Jack wants to do is be alone and not speak to anyone that never includes the man sitting beside him at the kitchen island because conversation with Alex feels like breathing. 

Jack insists on doing the dishes since Alex cooked and Alex only agrees so he can hunt down a vase for the flowers. Jack is just finishing up drying a pan when he feels something get tucked behind his ear. He leaves the towel on the counter and reaches up and feels the petals from one of the flowers beside his eye. He turns to meet Alex’s bright gaze with own questioning one. 

“You look pretty,” Alex responds, simply.

Jack leaves the flower tucked behind his ear as he refills their glasses and takes them over to where Alex is sitting on the couch, his body sitting up as he adjusts the placement of the flowers now in a vase on the coffee table.

“Thank you again for these,” Alex says as he leans back and accepts the glass of wine being held toward him. He takes a sip and hums before dropping his head against Jack’s shoulder. “It’s been too long since I had something alive other than myself living in this room.”

“Kill all your succulents, then?” Jack teases. 

“Only that one I kept in the corner over there that you always said would die because the light couldn’t reach it,” he gestures toward the empty corner where the spiny succulent used to sit. “The rest I took to my classroom to brighten up that space.”

The conversation shifts then to inquire about the plants Jack keeps at his place (Did the peach tree make it through that frost in April?) and more back and forth about their jobs and activities from the last several months that they hadn’t hit during their exchanges at the bar during the few weeks prior. Eventually the conversation comes to a gentle lull as they lean against one another while sipping at the last of what’s in their glasses.

“Wait!” Alex jumps up suddenly and jogs in the direction of his room. He reemerges only seconds later, before Jack even has time to question his actions. In his hands is the familiar, scratched up instant camera and a permanent marker.

“Okay, now don’t move but smile,” Alex instructs as he hits the power button and brings the camera up to frame the shot. Jack only laughs as he feels a familiar (and god, greatly missed) blush paint across his cheeks as he looks toward the lens and smiles. The flash momentarily has him seeing spots as he hears the picture print while Alex tucks himself back into his side. He throws an arm around Alex’s shoulders, his fingers playing with the collar of the soft t-shirt while they watch it develop.

He looks goofy, as he always does, but happy. So damn happy. He watches Alex turn the picture over and scribble down the date and a small heart. “Since when do you write the date on them?” he asks. He never remembered Alex doing that before and he knows for a fact that all of the ones that got handed off to him don’t have anything added onto them.

“I figure if I label them then it’s less that I have to hope just sticks in my head, ya know?” Alex explains as he turns the picture back to the front, his thumb running up and down the side of the print. Jack watches him place it inside the pocket on his flannel. “I want to be more present. Figure this might help.”

Jack feels his eyes soften as he lets out the last bit of breath he hadn’t even realized he’d still been holding this entire time. He trusted Alex, he trusted that they could make this work again, that they would somehow be able to take things slower this time. But there had been just a sprinkle of worry still left somewhere in his mind about keeping this space-obsessed, dreamer of a man with both feet on the ground and his head below the clouds. And something about this tiny gesture and Alex’s reasoning for it told him all he needed to hear to make that last bit of worry blow away. 

He turns to face Alex more fully then and takes in his tired eyes and wine-stained lips. Jack lifts a hand to cup his cheek, his thumb tracing below his eye. “I’m really happy we made it here.”

Alex turns his face to press a kiss against Jack’s palm before looking back to meet his eyes and lean into Jack’s hold. “Me too.”

They spend another moment (or two or three) just sitting together in the middle of a moment that normally would have Jack’s mind racing with anticipation but instead just feels calm in a way he hasn’t experienced since the last time he spent a wine drunk night lounging on Alex’s couch. He’s starting to worry that they’ll fall asleep (and he knows that they’re both a bit too old to be falling asleep on the couch on a school night), when he gets an idea.

He sits up and a sleepy Alex follows the action, his confusion obvious as he blinks his further open. Alex points to the camera on the end table behind Alex. “Hand me that?”

Alex catches on to Jack’s plan and smiles as he reaches for the camera, hitting the power button again before handing it to Jack. He holds the camera out as far as his arm allows and throws his left arm back around Alex’s shoulder to pull him into his side. Alex lets out a gasped laugh as Jack presses his lips against the top of Alex’s cheek, and just barely notices the flash through his squeezed shut eyes. “You’re ridiculous,” Alex continues laughing as he lets himself get pulled impossibly closer to Jack while they watch the photo develop.

It’s a blurry shot since Jack is out of practice on keeping the camera still but the joy is obvious on Alex’s smiling face and even on Jack’s as he smiles into the kiss against Alex’s cheek. Their fingers brush as they both try to reach for the picture but Alex snatches it away while using his free hand to reach for the marker and scribbling a matching caption to the other picture onto the back. He turns back to Jack and holds the print in between them. “You should keep this one.”

Jack smiles wide. “Just like old times, huh?”

Alex’s expression softens for a moment and he reaches a hand up to the back of Jack’s neck as he brings their lips together briefly. Alex pulls away just enough the rest his forehead against Jack’s, and Jack can’t help but notice how for the first time in a long time he’s not swimming in nostalgia or making up a future he’s not even sure exists. Right now he’s just here, with Alex, and that’s all that matters for now. 

It’s summed pretty perfectly he thinks when he feels Alex’s laugh against his lips and whispered words. “Maybe like new ones, too.”

*

[willowbird]

Your writing is so amazing!! I feel like we don't deserve to ask for more because you already gave us so many great drabbles but if its no trouble, could you do 5 and 9?

This has been so much fun and it's no trouble at all!! Writing these lil kisses has been fun and fluffy and feel-good and honestly exactly what I need right now 🧡💙🧡

Throwing their arms around their other person's neck followed by a kiss so passionate and so long that they share each other's breath. 🥰

Oh and @alittlelately this is what I was writing when you asked.

-----

Seven months, two weeks, three days, nine hours, and seventeen minutes.

That's how long it had been since Neil had seen Andrew. Seven long months and some change, where he not only hadn't been able to see the man he loved, but had been barred from calling or communicating with him at all. It had been excruciating, but he had done it and each and every day he had told himself that it was worth it. That it would be worth it for this, this moment and every one that followed.

That had been the deal after all:

One last job for his uncle. One last push to secure the Hatfords' hold on the isle and its alliances with their sister syndicates in France and Germany. Andrew had gone to Germany and Neil to France and had promised not to contact each other until both Dame Lucille and Der Gärtner had agreed to a very binding truce with the Hatfords. Once it was done, then both Neil and Andrew would be free -- Neil of his familial obligations and Andrew of his debt to the syndicate. They could leave, walk away with no shadow, no leeches on their shoulders, just a long open road ahead of them where they could go wherever they wanted, be whoever they wanted, together.

Seven months, two weeks, three days, nine hours, and seventeen minutes.

Neil hadn't even know it was going to end today, not until he got the call from his uncle about an hour ago.

'Are your bags packed?' he'd asked when Neil answered the phone.

'What?'

'Well, I'm just assuming you two plan to hit the road the second he lands, so I thought I'd check to make sure your bags are--'

'When? Where?' Neil had interrupted as soon as his brain had caught up with the information he was being given.

His uncle's voice had softened, not quite to warmth but to something like understanding. Neil knew his uncle loved him -- but his loyalty was always going to be, first and foremost, to the Hatford Syndicate. Since Neil wanted to leave it, he couldn't afford to give him much of that care. At least, not outwardly.

'His plane should land in about an hour. The apartment is yours for as long as you want it. You'll always be family, kid. But... I understand if you want to disappear. It's up to you, and I will respect your wishes.'

And now, here he was. Standing on the remote private airstrip belonging to the family, watching as the small jet rolled to a stop. It took every fiber of his limited self-control to keep himself from breaking into a dead sprint and scaling the outer shell to be there when the fucking door opened.

Somehow, he managed.

Well, at least until the the stairs were rolled up and the door did open. A shadow fell across the opening from the inside, and then a man emerged - dressed in dark jeans and a black jacket, long blond hair in a simple queue over one shoulder, reading glasses still perched high on the bridge of his nose from whatever book he'd been attempting to read on the flight. Attempting, because Andrew had always hated flying, and any distraction was only ever partially effective.

The second Neil saw him, he was moving -- though it wasn't a decision he could recall consciously making. One moment he'd been standing back beyond the safety lines, lingering near the hangar, and the next he was moving forward. Then he was jogging, then he was running. Sprinting. Racing.

But he wasn't the only one.

No one had probably told Andrew that Neil would be there, because he froze at first, the second he saw Neil, and even from the distance Neil could see the shock on his usually too-poised face. A beautiful, cold face that warded off every nuance. A stunning mask of indifference, shattered as he saw who was waiting for him.

For first came surprise, then another thing entirely -- something that might have been pain or wonder or hope but was really just... love.

He took one tentative step down the stairs, then another. Then he took the rest in two leaps and was moving toward Neil with long, powerful strides.

They came together like the birth of a star. Fire and life exploding in a vacuum, creating gravity and the potential for and entire world to exist just within the realm of their touch. One moment they were twenty feet apart, then ten, then five, then a breath, and then not even that much. Two halves of a whole universe, expanding and contracting in the aura of their singular connection.

Neil's arms instantly went around Andrew's neck and Andrew's hands wound about his back, clutching him like he'd bring him so close as to protect him behind the armor of his ribcage, sheltered right beside his beating heart. Then their mouths found each other and oh it was like coming home. It didn't matter where they were. England, France, Germany, fucking Tasmania -- mouth to mouth and soul to soul with their hearts matching a rhythm they could dance to in their sleep, as long as they were together they would be home.

They kissed not only as if to say 'hello' and 'I missed you' and 'this was far too long'. They kissed to remind each other, but not because they needed to remember -- because how could you ever forget yourself? No, they reminded each other of their touches and their taste and the feel of their heat. They kissed to remember that this... This was forever and finally, finally, forever began today.

When the kiss finally broke neither could bear to pull far. Neil felt Andrew tremble in his arms and he was sure the other man was feeling the same of him. Their lips remained lightly grazing as they gasped for air, sharing breaths, shaky and light-headed and a little bit overwhelmed.

Neil's voice was rough when he spoke, and all he could manage to say was, "Andrew." Then, because he could finally say it, he said it again, and again.

"Andrew. Andrew. God. Andrew. I.. A-Andrew."

"I know," Andrew rasped quietly, putting only enough distance between them for their eyes to meet. Neil could still feel Andrew's breath against his cheek and was not let willing to let go of that sensation, would not surrender that nearness. Not yet.

So he didn't. So he held on. He looked into the most beautiful honey-sunrise eyes he had ever seen and he did not let go. He held on and he said, "Andrew." He held on and he put eternity into his grasp as he held on tight and promised, promised, with each breath he took and every ounce of strength in his body, that he would never, ever, let go again.

Andrew looked back and held on just as tight, and with the shake of his soft gasps and the fierceness of his gaze, he promised too.

[legionofpotatoes]

alright here’s ma thoughts on that flick I mentioned

we hatewatched a*my of the dead because we were CONVINCED “zombies in las vegas” would be an impossible concept to screw up, but in so assuming we obviously invoked a holy wager with the universe and got reminded, once again, that hoping for improvement from someone who’s dependably put out bad art is never a wise choice 😐

but we were honestly kinda roped in by the marketing??? and expected a goofy fast-paced flick with the odd traditional undead metaphor thrown in, framing some sort of relationship drama maybe or hell even nothing at all! we’d have taken pure indulgent storytelling, idk italian job with zombies in las vegas, I don’t know fucking anything but??? whatever this was???? spoilers below for it is time for One Of My Rants

I mean the main reason I really want to write all this and complain. this film here probably has the most unappealing cinematography I have ever experienced in my life and that is saying something. who the fuck signed off on that CONSTANT shallow-ass depth of field that imprisons your eyeline and turns every shot into bokeh paste???? and I mean every shot almost!!!! I promise if you think I am overreacting just throw a dart at the seek bar and watch twenty seconds from wherever it lands. it is horrifying to look at. at least it gave my girlfriend a good visual shorthand for what it’s like when I lose my glasses

why was sean spicer in this movie. did they pay him to be here. was sean spicer paid hollywood money for his scene in this film because fuck everyone who was involved in that decision

the legitimately baffling hints at the extraterrestrial origins of the infection that went absolutely nowhere and had no dramatic or plot-level bearing. we love to see the franchise sprouts fellas

yet another big budget waste of everything hiroyuki sanada has to offer. and bautista too I guess? I like him but man was this an odd career move

what was the crux of his conflict/resolution with his daughter btw. I understand it was rooted in miscommunication over their forms of grief irt mom but uhh… it was all rather clunky and didn’t land for me. I tried I really tried to buy in but something was wrong fundamentally with the groundwork there, it did not click and their catharsis felt unearned. I know there’s massive amounts of tragic baggage being projected there from the author so I’m not slapping any judgment down really;

but again it would be an easy thing to wave off if they just had a vibrant cast of lovable simpletons with good chemistry and the kinetic sense of plotting the trailers promised (and this premise never discounts good drama, either). but instead it was just two and a half (!) hours of meandering into situations the filmmaking instincts had no idea how to flow in and out of

to wit. I know talking about “bad pacing” is associated with armchair bullshit but consider the example of the scene were dieter does an out of nowhere little dance after childishly screaming but then still-killing a zombie, with the film framing this as a micro character triumph, and not a second later the bg soundtrack instantly fades into an orchestral score dramatizing a nearby mcguffin reveal, completely 180 degreeing the tone without a semblance of deft insert shot stitching or even I dont know a fucking jump cut maybe. now imagine this whiplash for 2.5 hrs uninterrupted

I will keep complaining about the length yeah because this was not a story requiring this much real estate to be told. Uhh in my humble and personal opinion, of course

[man sees zombie tiger] “this is crossing the line!” you can in fact write dialogue that is not utter nonsense that falls apart once you drill down its single fickle layer of referential meta winking. what line are you talking about. you have rules in this insane situation you’re in? total nitpick moment I know but it got burned in my brain for some reason. like a microcosm of the mismanaged dramatic instincts paired with weird writing that dots this movie. I am sure the director calls this either satire or genre deconstruction. I am SO sure

tumblr domino meme that goes from “dude getting sucked off while driving” to “entire las vegas literally nuked”

tig notaro is always great to see but once you know she’s been filmed as a separate greenscreen plate months after photography wrapped - cause she had to apparently replace some abusive asshole but that’s a whole other pig not worth fucking - it becomes impossible to unsee her odd detachment from everyone else in the movie lmao. it doesn’t really “ruin” anything on its lonesome but it is hard to unsee

why. was. sean. spicer. in. this. movie

a very simple key ingredient missing from fully turning lip service sympathy for main uruk hai dude into actual empathy that would generate meaningful conflict with hero family would be to spend a bit more time articulating what he internally wanted the most. because he was obviously trying to do something here with pointed agenda. a family, to have kids, build a caste system, save his wife’s head, return to his planet??? all of these could represent the bigger context in his psychology that spurred his vengeance but none of them are dramatically emphasized long enough for you to cheer him on. I’m not asking too much I promise. Articulating interiority of a mute character is pretty doable with deft cinema language, just gotta linger and hold a shot here and there for a few seconds, frame as his POV, donezo. I know this is also one of those like. “who cares” moments but the movie does, very evidently so, in making this guy an actual character. you can kinda piece it together and create a framework of sympathy for him, sure, but then again he ultimately becomes a foil to be killed and not defeated, so. Ehh whatever

quarantine zone stuff was not a wildly childish covid allegory quarantine zone stuff was not a wildly childish covid allegory quarantine zone stuff was n

the rooftop helicopter fakout at the end was such an ass-backwards, manufactured moment of what could be a simple setup/payoff it just pissed me off??? you gain nothing by giving sad dad five seconds of pointless crisis that flips right back to previous status quo ANYWAY, except for a weaksauce waste of runtime, which could be used instead to get inside notaro’s head and actually SHOW the remorse form as she took off, literally maybe even a frown playing on her face as she’s headed for safety right before we cut back to drax and the kid. just a simple-ass, minimal, momentary setup for what is the most basic filmmaking trick of creating macro catharsis moments. Just???? g o d if you can’t even land that shit why are you even doing any of this

that lil run final pam did was very very charming and super choreographed in a way that was the tiiiniest bit overdone

the whole intro with the simul-backstories and posing with family photos was just… oddly motivated. what was the goal? “here’s what we’re fighting for” vignettes? why? it’s not a functional setup in that vein. what was all that

also I am sorry if this is insensitive but the reasons most characters end up articulating to justify going back into the hell that destroyed their lives makes them sound seriously insane

I dont like complaining about CGI (honestly) but so much of it in modern movies can achieve higher fidelity if the animation is simply subdued. Do not overengineer and over-apply 2D cell methodologies and kinematics to each tiny twitch and movement in a hyper 3D model and I promise you. it will look a thousand times more natural. look at thanos in those last two movies. your rendering and detail are absolutely perfect with the tiger you just have to let stuff sit instead of constantly simulating swaying hair strands and firing off all facial muscles at once. great moment at one point where makeup zombie horse and CG zombie tiger are both in one shot together and just by unnecessary amounts of movement alone you can tell who doesn’t belong. again; detail, rendering, compositing, lighting, all picture-perfect; but y’all just gotta let the animation breathe sometimes, and chill it out

plot holes don’t really matter to me but it was kinda funny how lilly decided not to mention the enormous wrinkle in intel pertaining to an actual territorial tribe of intelligent zombies that require human offerings to let you pass, just so that reveal could play out in real time through the joyous punishment of the cartoonishly misogynistic dude

total chad move for mister uruk hai and final pam to rule from a rusted swimming pool complex

the ending with vanderohe oh my god. with the. cash stacks at the airport register. and specifically them working in his favor. that is literally something you do to get arrested under suspicion of theft. it was almost played for laughs and I respect that. coulda been goofier. make these movies goofy ya dorks

anyway, weird, weird movie. bad marketing. message unclear (something something sins of the father???), baffling editing instincts, literal worst-looking cinematography I ever laid eyes upon. Confidently dying on that last hill

[the-irish-mayhem]

Fosterson Fic Rec Masterlist: Oneshots

The Main Reclist has been split to fix the links that tumblr decided to break if there were too many of them in a single post. I’ll be keeping the main reclist updated (even if the links appear broken) as well as maintaining this list and the list for multichapters.

I need help expanding this list! If you have any favorites or fics of your own of your own you don’t see included in this list and you’d like to submit for consideration, please drop me a line.

List updated April 2020. New additions marked with **

Updated during this wild quarantined time, which should serve as a reminder to everyone to APPRECIATE YOUR CONTENT CREATORS! Leave all the comments and kudos to show our love for everything they do. Big thanks to everyone who recommended and/or created content for this amazing ship.

Rated G/K-K+

**Promise by igi_pigi: Thor visits Jane to say goodbye before he leaves for Asgard. Rec: Bittersweet but lovely post-AOU, semi AU pre-Ragnarok. | 1.1k

**Spooky Nights by igi_pigi: "So what is it about?" Thor asks. "Or are we to go in uninformed?"Jane's eyes instinctively flick towards the blank tv screen. Darcy was insistent about it being a horror movie this time - as they serve as "perfect romance fodder", according to the maniac. Jane has decided to go with the recent one, 'The Conjuring'. [Set a few months after Thor2] Rec: Just sweet, dumb, wonderful fluff. Not an ounce of angst to be found. Also Thor learning about Earth is always sweeeeet. | 3.2k

**Stars and Solitude by igi_pigi: It's Jane's first night in Thor's home, however unusual the circumstances. He wishes to show her somewhere. She thinks it's his room. [Set during Thor2] Rec: A nice lil add on, Thor inviting Jane further into his life. | 3.3k

**Can’t Go Back the Same Way You Came by gumbridge: Loki lets go. This is what happens after. (post-film; basically a fixit fic.) Rec: This is pretty Loki-centric, but Jane is fabulously written, the family unit that Loki gets inducted into makes me very happy, and the fosterson is understated but so important and wonderful. | 20k

**spring will come by LadyCharity: As if grieving over the death of her husband wasn't hard enough, Jane has to deal with Thor's angry, bitter, emotionally shot little brother. Rec: This is literally all pain but god it is so good. You can feel the love binding Jane and Loki and Thor and it is so, so well written. Holy shit. | Content Warning: Major Character Death | 12k

the universe in your hand by amonkeysue: For the free day of Fosterson Week 2019, Thor's finally taking the right chance to propose to Jane. Rec: an adorable little bite-sized proposal fic. | <1k

Who Lives, Who Dies by MissChrisDaae: When the dust settles, who is left? Rec: Post-Infinity War, semi-kidfic. Pretty cute, and brings Jane into the story like she should’ve been. | 1.2k

Morning by MissChrisDaae: Thor and Jane's morning is interrupted by their kids. Rec: Fluffy fluffy FLUFFY Jane and Thor with a whole gaggle of children. | <1k

Trending by MissChrisDaae: Jane and Darcy's work session gets a little derailed. Rec: For the Social Media day of Fosterson Week, a fluffy and silly bit, and feeds into the 2012 Avengers Fic nostalgia. | <1k

ever on and on by often_adamanta: Darcy has to correct three separate people at the reception about their relationship, not younger cousin or sister, but college professor and boss and finally best friend. Jane thinks about their surprise, the second glances they give her, and wonders. Rec: Jane deals with the implications of immortality. Her friendship with Darcy is so potent and real in this. | 3k

Before the Thunder Shook Us by niobium: #6, “Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?” #14, “Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always.” Rec: This is such a wonderful canon-insertion/canon divergence. Just enough fluff and bittersweetness to seem real. | 1k

Private Jokes by MissChrisDaae: Before his return to Asgard, Thor and Jane have a talk. Two years later, Thor misses a chance and Jane has to carry on. Rec: An AOU coda and a Ragnarok fix-it all in one. Feisty Jane and apologetic Thor. My bbs. | 1k

On the Physics of Magical Space Hammers by shinyopals: ‘So what does it mean to be “Worthy”?’ Jane asked. Jane doesn't mind sharing her life with Mjolnir. She just wishes she understood it a bit better. Rec: We’ve all wondered about Mjolnir and worthiness. Jane finally takes the initiative to find out with amazing results. | 4k

Fives Times Jane and Thor Broke Up and One Time They Didn’t by shinyopals: I didn’t know you were in the country, Jane,’ said Jane's grandmother. ‘Of course, nobody tells me anything.’ ‘It’s just a very last minute thing,’ said Jane, which Thor knew to be a lie. ‘I only arrived yesterday-’ another lie, ‘and I’m just on the way to work and thought I’d stop by and see Mom.’ This too was not true. ‘This is my friend Thor,’ she added, almost casually. ‘He’s been helping me with some work so we’re driving into the university together.’ This seemed the most flagrant of all the lies, but Thor decided not to let it show. It's not always convenient to be a relationship, so sometimes Jane and Thor have to make sacrifices. Rec: A giant SUCK ON THIS FEIGE that takes the “Jane and Thor break up” concept to the best possible places. | 12k

Hours Long and Short by shinyopals: The first night, Thor does not sleep. (Written for a post-TDW prompt for Fosterson Week 2017.) Rec: A really wonderful slice of life fic post-TDW. Deals with their trauma so wonderfully, and includes some lovely soft moments. | 4k

#7Days7Hobbies by shinyopals: Thor wants to try out some of Midgard's finest hobbies and turns to Twitter for suggestions. Jane isn't really sure how this is now her life. (Prompt for Day 4: Domestic, for Fosterson Week 2017.) Rec: One of my favorite things that’s ever been submitted for Fosterson Week. I love reading about Thor fully embracing Earth customs, particularly social media, which opal KNOWS is one of my weaknesses. | 5k

A Question of Honor by shinyopals: ‘Paintball?’ said Steve. ‘We could do… that…’ ‘What is that?’ asked Thor. He nuzzled into Jane’s hair. His mead-breath was giving her a headache. ‘It’s a thing- a game… thing. With paint.’ ‘Rogers, stop explaining stuff to Thor, you’re embarrassing me.’ Tony’s voice was remarkably coherent. Must have been drinking sensibly. Bastard. When it comes to deciding whether Earth or Asgard has better warriors, the stakes are high, and Jane is wishing she'd kept her big mouth shut. Rec: TEAM BUILDING EXERCISES FOR THE WIN. | 8k

The Gift Horse by fartherfaster: Sam and Darcy are formally introduced for the first time. Sam says “formally” with some flexibility. And a couch. A couch and a great deal of flexibility. Nevermind, he’s said enough. They met, is what he’s trying to say. Or, Sam's early days with the whole gang. Rec: Mostly a teamfic from Sam Wilson’s POV, which is awesome because how often do you see that. Fosterson is mostly background, but it made me smile so much. | 3k

on the verge of understanding something extraordinary by dirgewithoutmusic: “Jane, you’re an astrophysicist, not a storm chaser,” said Erik Selvig, and he was wrong. She was just an astrophysicist too. (A Jane Foster character study) Rec: I’m relatively certain I read this before and loved it, only it somehow didn’t make the reclist. An amazing, touching, wonderful, stunning portrait of Jane Foster. | 9k

starlight in her eyes by jdphoenix: “You,” she says, voice strong with accusation. “You’re the one who attacked me!” Thor really must laugh at that. “You are the one who attacked me. Or is it considered polite among stars to crash into one another?” Rec: A really awesome take on a Stardust fusion AU. Full of inquisitive Jane and cocky Thor. It gave me really hard vibes from the first Thor film. | 1.2k

a true lady of Asgard by jdphoenix: It's not uncommon for Jane to fall asleep working when she's chasing a new theory or hunting down evidence but the middle of a battle for the future of Asgard is not the time. Rec: Jane becoming a fixture of sorts in Asgard is one of my kinks. Also Jane being friends with Thor’s friends and the people of Asgard. Kink. | 3.5k

Afterwit by RC_McLachlan: Good with patients, bad with relationships. That's what she told Thor before she ripped the name tag from the shirt in his hands and crumbled it in her palm, relishing the way the sticky back clung to her skin before she threw it in the waste bin. She'd never been so right in her life up to that point—the rightest she's ever been was when she decided to offer the crazy blond guy a ride to his mysterious non-satellite in the desert. Or, the one in which Jane and Thor run into Donald Blake. Rec: I am such a sucker for the “running into the shitty ex with the New and Improved Partner” trope and this is that. All of that to such a wonderful degree. | 2.7k

drabbles by freshexes: Rec: Some really fantastic little bits of prose. Great voices of Thor and Jane. Some fluffies, some angst. | 1k

The Good Times are Killing Me by alwaysaprilia: Rec: Modern royals AU. Jane and Thor are perfect in this. The dialogue is sublime, and the interactions made me squee really hardcore. I only wish there was more. | 3.6k

College AU by anthropologicalhands: Rec: It’s kinda more meta/heacanon, but it’s really adorable. | 1k

all’s fair (in love and war) by sweetwatersong: This is what you fight for. This is what you yearn to feel: this moment, this passing of every second, this rush of life and the indomitable strength of the present. Thor is a warrior, born and bred, and he is glad of any battle - and yet, as with all things, even this can change. Rec: A Thor introspect and a really well done second person perspective. | 1k

Five Times Thor Gets His Shirt Off FOR GREAT JUSTICE And One Time He Doesn’t by shinyopals: Sometimes Thor’s armour is more useful when not being worn by him. He definitely doesn’t end up in these situations on purpose. Rec: Please bury me in every single five times fic shinyopals has written. This one might be my absolute favorite. So many fantastic interactions for Thor, not just with Fosterson (which is BEYOND perfect), but the whole team. Plus: naked Thor fighting bad guys in an apron. Also the SamSteve is so strong and I’m in love. | 9.8k

A Discussion of Hypotheticals by shinyopals: Jane and Thor talk about their future. Hypothetically. Rec: I am so glad we’ve made Fosterson Week a thing because this fic is WONDERFUL. Great communication makes me weak, and also so many squee-worthy moments. | 5k

Jane Foster Versus the Internet. Or: Five Times Jane Allegedly Dated An Avenger And One Time She Apparently Did Not by shinyopals: Jane discovers that the internet is The Worst. Rec: It’s the thing I loved so much I made graphics for it because it’s so good. Jane’s interactions with all the Avengers are delightful, not to mention her steady relationship with Thor that is so grounded and real. It’s also freaking hilarious. | 10.4k

Untitled by polyamoryavengers: Rec: Angst and fluff and Jane comforting Thor. *cartwheels into the sun* | 1k

Sexiest ‘Something’ Alive by Niobium: Tony is bound and determined to make sure a human is awarded the title of Sexiest Man Alive (he even has a solid candidate in mind); Jane just wants media outlets to get their science right. Rec: This is absolutely fantastic. Just the right kind of blend of humor, sweetness, and meta criticism ever. | 7.5k

The Hours Filled by websandwhiskers: Ritual and comradery are basic human needs. Rec: Focus on Jane, not a ton of Thor, but pregnant Jane is always a delight. | 1.7k

First Dates? by hariboo: Jane’s not really sure what her and Thor’s first date is? The party or the barbecue? In end does it matter? Rec: I am not a big fan of high school AUs, but if they float your boat, this is definitely worthwhile. | 1.4k | Part of Let’s Be Young Forever series

Of Car Crashes and Coffee by hariboo: “you bumped my car and I’m so piss- oh wow no you’re hot let’s go for a coffee” au prompt. Exactly what it says on the tin. Rec: This made me giggle. Super duper cute. | 1.3k

Tactile Perception by RC_McLachlan: “The day I met you, I knew you would see me.” Her hands find his face, sliding over his jaw, his cheeks, and she brings their foreheads together. “The day I met you, I hit you with my car. Twice.” Rec: *dies quietly* Teasing and cute story telling and just so many good things. | 2k

Clarke’s Third Law by shinyopals: “Of all the people to knock down the stairs, she would pick the practically-seven-foot-tall son of the Minister for Magic who just happens to be the Gryffindor Quidditch Captain.” Jane’s just trying to read every single book in the Hogwarts library in between classes, and she’s not quite sure how Thor happened to her. Rec: I never read Harry Potter but damn it this makes me want to. I just love this. So much. I don’t know how but it happened. I actually really wish there was more? | 3.8k

The Most Daring Prophecies–Dr Jane Foster at TED Talk by Rozilla: A transcript of Jane giving a TED Talk on her experiences of crossing the cosmos, Asgard and her hopes for the future of interstellar travel - as reported on WHIH. Rec: I can’t tell you how badly I wanted this to be real. Fosterson is mentioned a bit, and it makes me smile a lot. | 5.1k

Paradigm Shift by jdphoenix: “Jane’s implementing a ‘new organizational paradigm.’ She does this like once a year, usually when she’s extra stressed. Like after that time your brother messed up NYC.” Rec: cute domestics plus Jane is worthy. | 1.5k

Raging Storm by jdphoenix: Thor knows the moment he touches the hammer that it is not Mjolnir. Rec: A brilliant continuation of Paradigm Shift (above, previously recced) wherein Jane bests Loki and is worthy, plus Jane talking down berserker!Thor. So many of my Fosterson hot buttons. | 4k

Overlap by littlestardust: A moment between Thor and Jane. Alternative summary: Thor is respectful of Jane’s life choices, and also there is cuddling. Rec: Teeny tiny fic, but super cute. | <1k

amazed & confused by tashlae: Dating an alien/god/man who fell from the sky isn’t something to take lightly. Rec: Jane/Darcy centric with lots of talk about fosterson and a kinda sweet moment at the end. | 1k

untitled by ifilovedyouless: jane/thor, modern royals. Rec: Oh my god, the sweetness overload was too much. Also YAS Thor in military uniform. | 1k

Fosterson - dancing by batsonthebrain: Rec: Introspective, sweet, and with a heavy dose of mutual respect. | <1k

Unplanned by hariboo: The first person to hear Jane is pregnant isn’t Thor. It should be, but extenuating circumstances. This happens a lot when it comes to living in Stark Tower. Rec: Very much toeing the crack line. Baby!fic, obviously, plus fabulous Clint, and a semi?redeemed Loki. | 1.2k

clash of the (scientific) titans by anthropologicalhands: Thor brings Tony to meet Jane. Thor admits he probably could have thought it through a little better. Rec: this fic always makes me giggle. Fosterson is mostly background, but the interactions between everyone makes this worth it. | 1k

Through Doors by nayanroo: The Jedi Order knows a good team when they see it, but unfortunately even the best-planned missions always have something go hilariously wrong. That’s when the true strength of any bond is shown. Rec: A Star Wars fusion is always a good idea. The way Jane and Thor play off each other and their bond through the Force is lovely. | 4k

Straight On 'Til Morning by arsenicarcher: Thor and Jane are having a baby. Tony’s conflicted about the whole thing. Rec: Kinda Tony-centric, but I’m always up for a fosterson baby. | 4.4k

hard to keep the rainclouds out by veliseraptor: Rec: A unique view on Thor’s grief and Jane’s struggle to be there for him. Very lovely, very angsty. | 2.1k

Perils of an RPF Life by hariboo: Look, it isn’t that she isn’t excited for Jane, sure she is. But Darcy wonders if Jane ever thinks about that. The fact she’s dating the sexiest E.T. ever. Rec: Darcy’s voice in this is hilarious and touching all at once. Jane and Thor’s caring for each other is so clear and endearing I audibly squeed a few times. | 2k

amazed & confused by tashlae: Dating an alien/god/man who fell from the sky isn’t something to take lightly. Rec: Jane and Darcy friendship is a lot of fun. Jane’s pondering of their relationship seems very characteristic of her. | 1k

On The Unsubtle Nature of Fish Ties by Niobium: Fancy clothes shopping for your alien boyfriend should be easier than this. Or, how Thor got his red velvet jacket. Rec: Fosterson is mostly background, but cute Jane/Darcy/Pepper interaction. | 3.3k

Be Safe by MissChrisDaae: Thor and Jane have a contingency plan for emergencies. Rec: Speculation/AU for Age of Ultron. Baby!fic, and is just so damn cute. | <1k

It All Happens Here by MissChrisDaae: Her very first year of teaching, Jane Foster gets an unusual bonus in the form of one of her students’ extremely attractive father. Single dad and his daughter’s kindergarten teacher au. Rec: super fluffy and just adorable. | 7.5k

Remembrance by Are_you_ever_not_going_to_fall_for_that: Thor and Jane take a walk and come across something that sparks memories. Post The Dark World. Rec: Jane and Thor talk about Loki, and the lack of heavy angst is refreshing. | <1k

Traffic jam by kes: When you’ve been fighting omnicidal aliens and the bureaucracy, a getaway is in order. Unfortunately, flying from A to B isn’t always possible… Rec: domestics. cute domestics EVERYWHERE. | <1k

nothing is ever convenient (except to make things uncomfortable) by anthropologicalhands: After Thor returns, there is still the matter of responding to Richard. Rec: The awkwardness of dealing with Richard made me smile. A very smile inducing fic. | 1.3k

Jane on Top by Rozilla: Jane Foster is asked to lecture at the SHIELD Academy, but she feels her old anxieties and worries begin to creep in- but it’s okay. Darcy has her back, not to mention it appears she has a fan club at the Science and Tech Division of the SHIELD Academy! Rec: An unapologetic Jane-fest, which is my favorite kind of party. Fosterson is background, but very relevant. Darcy is a cool friend. | 4.1k

leave this star crossed world behind by anthropologicalhands: Sif visits Jane with an offering. Rec: Jane/ Sif friendship, and they talk about immortality. Great interactions and insights on fosterson. | 2k

Measured Uncertainties by plushbug: Gap-filler, applying to the 2011 Thor movie. A shot at what might have gone missing from the rooftop scene between Thor and Jane Foster, after his 'rescue’ from the SHIELD base. Fits between “…and Asgard. That’s where I come from.” and “Thank you, Jane." Rec: A good fill for the movies, explains some comic-verse continuties. Curious Jane is a lovely person, and Thor relishes in giving her knowledge. | 4k

halfway between the gutter and the stars by verity: Thor pulls his phone out of his pocket and lifts it above them to capture a picture of the moment, their hair lit by the sun, Jane’s soft smile next to his beaming grin. The Rise filter suits the image perfectly. “I shall title this 'THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE,’” Thor says, typing carefully on the touchscreen. “With the small image of your planet, flanked by sparkling stars." "Well, we abandoned a geocentric model of the galaxy hundreds of years ago,” says Jane. "'THE CENTER OF MY UNIVERSE,’“ Thor says. He amends his caption and selects the options to crosspost from Instagram to Twitter and Facebook. Rec: Okay I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE this. So much. I love the world-building that Avengers + social media allows for. Also, cute Thor and Jane and team stuff plus Neil Degrasse Tyson and George Takei. So much good stuff. | 2.2k

Catalysts by Niobium: Meeting people winds up being a catalyzing event in Jane Foster’s life more often than not. Rec: Well-written Jane, and super supportive boyfriend Thor. I love it when he treats her like a genius. | 2.1k

The Reconstruction of the Mind by Niobium: Jane Foster’s introduction to astronomy doesn’t start with a backyard telescope or a shooting star or the arm of the Milky Way strewn across the nighttime sky, but with an Alexandrine woman named Hypatia. Rec: Jane-centric, and very well done, as per usual with this author. Fosterson is more background, but they have some lovely moments. | 4.6k

Asgardian Cautionary Tales for Young Maidens by Niobium: Jane discovers that Asgardian love stories aren’t exactly romcoms. Rec: Jane and Thor sharing love stories. I audibly squeaked at their cuteness. | 2.3k

the new millennia by hoosierbitch: Thor’s life was measured in centuries, not days. Rec: Post-Dark World, very Thor oriented and introspective. Jane helps him through his grief over Loki. Angst on angst. | 1.1k

the drumming inside her by hariboo: she can feel everyone looking at her, waiting for her to break or give up. they don’t understand. she made a promise too. Rec: oh my god Jane being determined, Thor pining a bit, Heimdall being awesome, and a super sweet reunion. | 1.3k

Starchild by empyrean: One night Jane teaches Thor the basics of Western astronomy, and Thor tries to describe Asgard. Then the Bifröst breaks, and Jane isn’t having that. Rec: Jane and Thor bond over the stars, and Jane doesn’t take it sitting down when the Bifrost breaks. Love the simplicity and the power in this. | 1k

There by Barkour: Jane has found Thor and in the finding, she has gone somewhere she’d never dreamed she’d see. Rec: Jane geeking out over Asgard, plus some really cute banter, and Thor being a gent as always. | 1.9k

Numbers and Lines by Sheeana: Jane Foster visits Avengers headquarters to help install a program she designed, and gets caught up in helping with their latest problem. Rec: Jane and Natasha get some great action together, and the Fosterson is handled well. | 4.9k

Important Meals of the Day by hariboo: or alternatively: Five Breakfasts With Jane and Thor and them feeding their family and friends. Which sometimes lately seem to be the same thing. Rec: domestics! Fluff that makes me want to stay there forever! I love this author’s way of writing fosterson. Also Darcy is so great in this. | 6.2k

Fire in the East by Maat: He finds that there are sweeter things than mead and glory and the fierce bright colors and rich textures of Asgard. Rec: Best Thor-being-on-Earth-longer fic that I’ve read. Short, poignant, sweet, and painful. This is beautifully written and left me wishing this was how the canon story could have gone down. | 1.1k

Few So Generous by galaxysoup: After Odin falls into the Odinsleep, Frigga takes up her husband’s spear and the rule of Asgard. Rec: Jane and Thor from an outside perspective, and a different version of events. Though the focus is not on fosterson outright, it is still a very good fic. | 2.7k

we fall like stars by jadeddiva: All that is left of him now is the extra chair pulled up to her makeshift fire pit, which she never sits in and hasn’t had the heart to move. Jane, and the search for Thor and a greater understanding of herself. Rec: A character study of Jane and how Thor affected her life. Lovely and poignant. Fluid writing style. | 3.1k

Not "Functional” or “Elegant” by Niobium: Jane Foster has worked some bad jobs in her career; working with Stark Industries’ R&D is a vast improvement. Rec: Jane-centric, and gives her a great backstory. She and Thor are adorable as always. The author clearly respects Jane as a scientist, so that shows through a lot, which is amazing. | 1.6k

Jane Foster’s High School Reunion by Niobium: Jane Foster has a high school reunion to go to. Rec: Jane and Thor are adorable. Thor is a gentleman, and Jane gets to laugh in the face of a jerk. Very satisfying. | 5k

Nature and Nurture by nayanroo: What’s better than solving a physics problem that may well get you another Nobel Prize nomination? Having a baby on the same day. Rec: Part of an amazing series (full rec with multichapter fics below) but can be read as a standalone. Featuring pregnant!Jane and adorable and far-too-accurate expectantfather!Thor. The fluff is lovely. Features all of the Avengers with some lovely domestics. | 7.4k | Part of in progress series, The Kingsverse

don’t we all want happy endings? by hariboo: Thor is thinking about Jane, Steve cares (because Steve has Feelings about Lost Lady Loves*), and in the end it’s a team effort. Rec: We get the closure on Thor contacting Jane after the events in New York. Sweet and painful and just lovely. | 3.4k

Legacy by me: A generation later, a budding social scientist tries to figure out Jane and Thor. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. Both Jane and Thor have passed away in this fic. | 2k

Rated T

**Heed the Signs by igi_pigi: Thor wakes up from a nightmare. Is it just a dream, or something more? [Post Thor2, Pre Thor3.] Rec: A heavy, meaningful setup to a Thor 3 that never was. | 4.8k

**Heartless by igi_pigi: Everything reminds her of him, it's funny. Wherever she looks, whatever she thinks of, usually and especially to get her mind off him, will eventually lead to him. [Set the night before Jane's date with Richard in Thor2.] For Day 6 of Fosterson Week - 'things that make you think of them' Rec: A really interesting and fabulous rumination from Jane about Thor’s impact on her life. | 1.4k

**Her Healing Touch by igi_pigi: Jane doesn't really realise that the Aesir are a bit relaxed when it comes to physical hurt. And freaks out over what Thor thinks are just petty bruises of battle. Ending with a little confession from Thor. [Set after Thor2] Rec: A neat take on Asgardian culture, love the way Jane’s care connected to Thor’s past. | 2.5k

**Qeryana by Domenika Marzione (domarzione): Thor and his efforts to live on Midgard, as opposed to just defending it. Rec: Thor’s visceral struggle of living in a culture not his own, but is ultimately still hopeful and positive. | 3k

**First and Foremost, Red by RC_McLachlan: There's a reason Jane and Thor break up. It's not a great one but it's the right one. In the year that follows, Jane carries on, doesn't win a Nobel Prize, defeats Thanos and saves the universe, and finally allows herself to be a little selfish. Rec: YAAAAAS I want ALL the Jane Saves Everything in Infinity War/Endgame fic. ALL OF IT. It’s so satisfying and good. | 9.7k

**Gangráðr, Faðmbyggvir Friggjar by tsukinofaerii: Less than a week before her wedding, Frigga warns Jane of ancient Asgardian rituals she and Thor must undergo before her marriage ceremony. Jane and Thor call on their friends for help as they face what might be the challenge of their lives. Rec: Just an absolute fucking delight from start to finish. Hilarious and amazing. Absolutely the best of the 2012-era Avengers fics. | 19.1k

The Courage of Stars by always_a_queen: Half the universe turns to dust. Thor goes to find the one person who is his whole universe. Thor/Jane Post-Infinity War and during/after Endgame. Spoilers for both movies and Ragnarok. Rec: god this is so heartbreakingly perfect. A wonderful fix it that gives a perfect little taste of what we might’ve had if Jane had been rightfully included in these movies. Jane does pass away at the end of the fic. | Content Warning: Major Character Death | 4.3k

Family Values by shinyopals: ‘It would have been kinder to leave me dead,’ Loki informs her one day. Jane Foster, who’s just revoltingly kissed Thor goodbye, told him she loves him, and called him a disturbing pet name, snorts derisively. ‘He brought you lunch; quit whining,’ she says. Loki isn't sure how he feels about his family, these days. Rec: The best take on Loki ever. His relationship with Jane is fabulous, and the interplay between him, Thor, and Jane is AMAZING. What a freakin treat this fic is. Post-Infinity War AU. | 3k

The Second Law of Thermodynamics by shinyopals: ‘What have you done?’ he asks. He still attempts to sound grave, but with Jane it is hard not to give into smiles.‘Done? I haven’t done, well. I mean. I have done some things. But it’s not bad. I was just curious! And nobody stopped me. I mean, they even welcomed me. So. I didn’t do-’‘Jane,’ he interrupts, laughing and leaning down to plant a kiss on her mouth. ‘You are absurd. I missed you. Tell me.’ Rec: Pardon me while I try to physically scream this fic into existence. It’s perfect. Jane loves science, and Thor loves Jane. Post-Thor 2. | 1.8k

Storm Warning by shinyopals: Then he strides to her and presses a kiss to her lips, taking her face in his hands as he does and holding her close. ‘You planned this?’ he asks. ‘Your morning’s work was not astrophysics, then?’She gives a guilty smile. ‘I wanted to, you know, surprise you.’ Thor gets ~romanced. He kinda likes it. Rec: GOD THE FLUFF. THE. FLUFF. PURE AND GOOD. | 3k

Sakaar by MissChrisDaae: Jane's been stuck on Sakaar for a year and a half. So Asgardians are a welcome sight. Rec: A really original way to get Jane involved in Ragnarok. Jane + science for the win. | 1.3k

Lab by MissChrisDaae: Thor likes spoiling Jane. Rec: For the Jane on Asgard day of Fosterson Week, a short and sweet lil tidbit! | <1k

Domesticity by MissChrisDaae: Little moments around Avengers Tower. Rec: I literally gasped in delight with how much this made me nostalgic for the fluffy Avengers Living in the Tower fics of 2012. | <1k

The Prince(ss) and Me by asoulofstars, MissChrisDaae: Prince Thor of Asgard just wants a little time to feel normal before he has to marry the mysterious Princess Jana of Ameos. So, he runs away from home and enrolls at Harvard University as Donald Blake, where he meets Jane Foster. Jane is clever, kind, and everything he wants, but can never have.Princess Jana of Ameos has spent her whole life studying incognito, getting the best global education possible under the alias of Jane Foster and trying not to think about romance, or the fiancé waiting for her back in Europe. Then Don Blake comes along and throws that plan out the window. Rec: A funky Modern Royals AU. Charming in some nice ways, and I like the slow-building tension. | 17k

Misunderstandings by writerblocked: She looks up at Thor, who grins warmly at her, and looks at their surroundings again. “This isn’t my apartment,” she says. Thor’s grin grows wider. “I know,” he says back. Rec: Newlywed!Fosterson fluff. | 1.8k

Turtures in Aeternum by shinyopals: ‘Legend tells that some unlikely souls are known to pause in their work for reasons of leisure,’ deadpans Thor. ‘History does not say what trials they faced.’ Asgardian science is giving Jane a headache. Thor persuades her to take a break to see some of the sights with him. Rec: Asgardian worldbuilding (literally) via Fosterson field trip. I love everything in this. | 5.5k

Five Times the Bad Guys Interrupted Thor and Jane's Date Night and One Time Tony Freaking Wishes They Had by shinyopals: ‘I have told Steve,’ Thor says to Tony as he’s leaving to go back to his rooms, ‘but I thought I should tell you also. Jane and I plan to institute the ritual of ‘Date Night’.’ As always, Thor sounds like someone’s severely uncool father trying to be hip when he uses any slang invented since the Civil War. Tony's been an Avenger long enough to avoid deliberately tempting fate, even if he doesn't actually believe in fate. The universe is just plain cruel. That's why he knows to be prepared for the worst Hydra can throw at them whenever Thor and Jane make evening plans. Rec: IT’S SO FUDGING CUTE. I CAN’T. IT’S CUTE AND HILARIOUS AND PERFECT AS ALWAYS. | 4.7k

Unexpected Arrival by shinyopals: ‘Jane-’ Thor cut himself off, opening and closing his mouth without managing words. Her name on his lips sounded so familiar; warm and deep and like nothing else mattered. An undercurrent of nerves there that she could still hear after all this time, that she didn’t think anyone else would be able to. She wanted to run to him, bury her face in his neck and jump back in time. Back before the break up - not enough time for each other with the universe in peril. Back before the baby. The baby she still sometimes wondered if she should have terminated to save them both this moment. Rec: The angsty and painfully yearning babyfic that you never knew you needed. | 2k

Steadfast as the Stars Above by jdphoenix: It was not meant to be like this. With him so small and weak, fighting every second to find purchase on a tiny world that spins faster than he can fathom. He wanted to be strong for her. Rec: A fabulous use of the Soulmate AU that completely slots itself perfectly into canon. | 8.3k

too poor for silver, i have a copper tongue by venndaai: “Maybe you don't have the perfect words all the time but, you always have something to say, right? You never have to, have to stop and think about it, and you never stumble over your words or anything.” He squinted at her. “I thought such things simply aspects of Midgardian speech, which you know I am not well versed in.” Jane sighed. “They're not supposed to be.” Rec: A story featuring an explicitly autistic Jane Foster. So wonderfully done. Full of empathy and love and kindness and warmth. | 1.3k

Gift by spikewriter: Jane looked at the brightly colored rug on the floor of the farmhouse in the Hudson Valley they were still moving into. “I like it,” she admitted with a bit more enthusiasm, picturing how her six-year-old self would have run screaming around the room in glee at such a gift. Rec: Some post-TDW fluff with bonus Darcy inclusion. | 1.5k

to candle incandescent as you pass by sweetwatersong: The legacy of King Tristan and the Star Queen Yvaine is not a mere tale in Stormhold, a fantastical portion of the kingdom's history. It lives and breathes in the blood of their descendants, in their long lives and graceful aging, in the ruling King Odin and his son, the Crown Prince Thor… Rec: A Stardust/Huntsman/Thor fusion that isn’t so much a full fic as it is, as the author describes, “a sketch.” Still a really lovely read, a great blend of the films. | 5k

Raiment of The Gods by randomcelt: They say the clothes make the man ... or the god. But sometimes, they do the most for his friends. (Or, a tale of all the times someone else wore Thor's clothes and the adventures necessitating such a development.) Rec: A great Thor character piece. A heavy emphasis on Thor + the team which I love. Runs you through the full gamut of emotions in the best way. | 10k

How to Quantify by Rozilla: It turns out Jane has a personal top ten list of favourite equations - and a nice expanse of hot Norse God to write them on. Rec: Super sweet and also contains the phrase ‘who said science never got you laid’ so. Yep. | 2k

this new bravery by hoosierbitch: For alfadorisawesome, who requested Thor/Jane “about to hook up with someone who doesn’t know.” This is my favorite piece so far. <3 Rec: Incredibly well done Trans Jane Foster. I am such a sucker for open lines of communication between partners, and that’s exactly what this is. Thor is incredibly sweet, and this story establishes his very nonbinary opinions on gender which I LOVE, but he still makes an effort to understand Jane’s experience. I love this fic so much. | 1k

The Hammer and the Ice by grav_ity: In the course of her short and mortal life, the heart of Jane Foster has been twice touched by the sons of Asgard. Rec: I adore AUs where Jane was in the Avengers. This is a short flashfic, but really lovely. | 1k

A Royal Wedding by MissChrisDaae and Science_Thunder_Lightning_Love: After three years, ten months, an alien invasion, a cosmic event, and a baby, Thor and Jane finally make it to the altar. Rec: Ridiculously cute fluffies. | 7.5k | Part of the Convergence series

The Thunder God Job by fuzzy_paint: Jane and Thor are thieves. Rec: Oh lawd, the AU I never knew I needed. Beautiful characterization with a rich world they’re placed in. I only wish it was 200 chapters. | 16.2k

there was a star danced by tosca1390: This is the familiar rhythm of her days; the coffee shop until one pm, five days a week, then class and the lab, then home or the library. Here, in her last year with a future dark ahead of her, she doesn’t see anything to change her ways. Jane and Thor, meeting at a coffee shop. Rec: College/Coffee Shop AU. Bless the AU gods. Sly little Shakespeare references. Thor and Jane being cute, sweet idiots. | 6.2k

Proximity Alarm by fayedartmouth: Thor comes back to Earth. Jane thinks it’s great. Except all the times it isn’t. Rec: It’s a great writing style. Jane and Thor are awkward, adorable, and passionate in a realistic way. Them navigating how to be together is a challenge that not all authors can rise to, so this is a great piece. So much yes. | 13.7

Never So Empty by iwillavengeyou: Thor has traveled the nine realms and seen many things in his centuries of godhood. What could possibly make everything seem so empty? Rec: Wow, just no. This hurts. This is not cool. Ow. Ow. Transcends angst and ends up somewhere much worse. Read if you’re into self-flagellation or are making a reclist. I literally yelled “Wow rude” at the conclusion of this fic. Major Character Death | 1.5k

An Ancient Gesture by Niobium: Jane and Thor come up with a tradition for dealing with situations where a social function gets to be a little too much for either of them. Rec: Super smiley, stomach flutter inducing fic. Fluff upon fluff, but also Asgard culture/worldbuilding! Yay! | 2.8k

Five Times Jane Kinda Sorta Accidentally Slept With An Avenger, The One Time She Didn’t, And the Many (Many) Times It Wasn’t Even a Little Accidental by shinyopals: Some people collect Avengers trading cards. Some collect action figures. Jane Foster, almost entirely without meaning to, has them all beat. Rec: If you’re not convinced by that title and summary, I’m not sure I can help you. Hilarious, in character, and kinda cute. | 9.3k

Well Remembered by Rozilla: Jane’s met Tony Stark before. Rec: Cracky and hilarious. | 1.1k

you may end up wanting more from this life by tosca1390: Everything is cold where it was once warm, and Jane is at a loss. Rec: Not sure why I haven’t put this beautiful thing on here yet. Deals with their separation, and a great character study of Jane. Angsty. | 1.6k

The Hearts of Stars and Thunder by MissChrisDaae, Science_Thunder_Lightning_Love: Rec: A Snow White and the Huntsman/Thor fusion. Really great use of characters, and all of the medieval battles and fosterson abound. | 7.7k

You Get One Phone Call by MissChrisDaae: Following the Battle of Manhattan, Jane gets a phone call. Rec: Post-battle strain, but then suddenly fosterson cuteness hits you like a wrecking ball. | <1k

Abs of Thunder by Unknownnobody32: During a flight on-board Stark’s jet, Jane learns how turbulence, pasta sauce, her Thunder god boyfriend, and his rock hard abs can soon become a recipe for embarrassment all thanks to bad timing. Rec: Takes washboard abs to another level. God, this is just too funny. | 2.1k

London, underground by Maybug: Clint Barton meets some familiar faces and has a very bad day hunting the jotunbeast left behind in London after the convergence. Rec: an awesome outside POV on fosterson, plus badass science Jane and her science assistant Thor, and awesome Clint. | 2.6k | Part of the Fosterson Files series

We have loved the stars to fondly by Maybug: Jane and Thor are up to something on the roof of the Tower. Tony thinks he knows what it is, but doesn’t see why he should be the one to tell them to stop. Rec: Outside POV of fosterson. Basically Thor does cute/dangerous things for Jane’s happiness. | 1.8k | Part of the Fosterson Files series

change places by coffeesuperhero: Jane and Thor get in the way of a Stark experiment. This goes about as well as you might expect. Rec: Body swap madness. So many cute moments though, plus some implied sexytimes with swapped bodies “for science.” So much yes. | 3.1k

Slowly, We Adjust by katsumi: Jane Foster leaves the lab on Friday exhausted, overworked, and petrified that she won’t get the grant proposal for her wormhole experiment finished in time to get funding. So, of course she gets rear-ended, because that’s just the kind of week she’s having. Rec: Protective/Worried Thor is best Thor. Reassuring Jane is best Jane. So much angst/cute. | 1.4k

Put a Ring on It by fuzzy_paint: Jane makes Thor a wedding ring. Rec: What it says on the tin. | 3.9k

The Pretty Birds Have Flown by beanarie: "Jane never pukes, not when she first wakes up, not at any other time of day. She has a cast-iron stomach and wicked stable inner ears, and morning sickness doesn’t stand a chance.“ The one where Thor knocked Jane up that night they chilled on the roof, and offscreen Frigga swore Heimdall to secrecy in the interest of protecting everyone involved. The All-Father’s house has a lot of enemies, okay. Rec: Heartbreaking, fluffy, and feelsy. Batten down the emotional hatches. | 2.2k

Jane Foster and the Impossible Library by Niobium: Jane, Darcy, and Thor find a peculiar library, and their afternoon takes a turn for the bizarre. Rec: This one’s wild from start to finish (I say that lovingly), but as always, Niobium delivers on fantastic characterizations. Not super-duper shippy, but so worth the read. | 12.4k | Part of the Jane Foster Works series

Northern Climes by Tyranusfan: Six months after the Avengers saved New York from the Chitauri invasion, Thor must convince Odin to return him to Earth. Rec: Jane and Thor doing cutesy couple-y things. The author captures well the eager awkwardness of a new couple while remaining true to their characters and story. | 4.3k

nowhere to go but up by anthropologicalhands: It is not uncomfortable, waking up with Thor’s arm draped over her waist, their legs entangled under the sheets. It is inconvenient when she wants to get out of bed or, at the very least, look over last night’s data. Rec: So very fluffy it makes me want to roll in it. Adorably domestic, too. Jane at her scienceing finest. | 2.3k

Late Night Waiting by hariboo: Jane didn’t often get home late. Rec: A very sweet and simple Jane/Thor that makes their relationship seem very grounded and real. Also, it is so sweet it makes my teeth hurt, and then I just want more. | 2.1k

Uru by sheffiesharpe: Thor cannot look after Jane, no matter how he wants to. Hogun offers a solution. Puente Antiguo receives another unexpected visitor. Rec: The author makes a really strange concept work brilliantly. Jane and Thor’s pining is frustrating and well-written, and the writing sizzles with unresolved sexual tension. | 6k

Star-Crossed by websandwhiskers: A vignette taking place during "Avengers”, after shawarma, before Thor returns to Asgard with Loki. Thor and Jane have their reunion, and discuss their future. Rec: Jane is an awesome person, and Thor respects the hell out of her. One of the best portrayals of Jane Foster that I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading. | 1.7k

The Morning After by fuzzy_paint: "I can’t believe we’re doing this,“ Jane says. "Can you believe we’re doing this?" Rec: Even without much in way of dialogue, Jane and Thor’s devotion is plain. We get a little view of domestics, too. | 1.7k

The Observable Universe by Sarea Okelani (sarea): As an astrophysicist, Jane studies the observable universe for work, but in her free time what she likes to study is a bit closer to home. (Or: Jane has a low tolerance for stupidity. Clint and Natasha take exception to being called stupid.) Rec: Not a ton of overt Jane/Thor, and is mostly an outsider POV on Clint/Natasha, but there is lots of team shenanigans and there is definitely a lot of affection for Thor from Jane’s POV. | 10k

Deal by GreenVelvetCurtains: Jane introduces Thor to the great Midgardian tradition of being made to remove your clothing when you lose a hand of poker. Everybody wins! Rec: I got a huge kick out of this one. Toeing the line of becoming crackfic. Oh, how I wish there was a smutty follow up. | 2k

Before the Fall by verily-thor: Jane helps Thor prepare for Ragnarök. Rec: Oh god, if you’re in the mood for some sadness, come on in here. Tragic without being grotesque, stripping it down to the bare emotions, and two people who love each other more than anything. | <1k

top gun is not a movie; it’s a lifestyle by hariboo: jane and thor got that loving feeling. Rec: an AU that is reminiscent of Top Gun, which is a fab movie. Awesome Jane, and adorable Thor. | 2k

A Brief Introduction to Asgardian Dinner Parties by jonesandashes and pentapus:  This is the first Earth-Asgard bonding opportunity since that time Loki punched interstellar relations in the face, twice, and the king and queen of Asgard are here, and they are her boyfriend’s parents. Jane is absolutely not going to get drunk at this party, is the point. Rec: This fic makes you smile, then laugh, then cringe, then do it all over again. | 4.5k

Destiny, Disrupted by me: Loki never sends the Destroyer to Midgard. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 3.5k

Rated M (these won’t contain the smuts unless otherwise noted)

**The Teardrop by igi_pigi: Post-Infinity War reunion of Thor and Jane. Forewarning - heavy angst. [Set right after the movie] Rec: Angst, melodrama, and desperation ahoy. Contains some smut | 4.2k

all the best distractions by fuzzypaint: They've found a rhythm when they share Jane's lab, Jane with her science and Thor with his own work, and though it is easy to be distracted by each other, usually they're both very capable of avoiding such things. Usually. Rec: Cunniligus in the lab ;) | Contains smut | 1.8k

Patience and Poker by Rozilla: Jane and Thor sneak off from one of Stark's parties for a quiet chat. Nope, just kidding, hot tub sex. Snarky hot tub sex. Best kind. Rec: What it says on the tin and it’s delightful. | Contains smut | 4k

A Deal with the Duke: An Epilogue by hariboo: Thursdays were busy days around the house, but today was the first day of winter much. Thankfully, the skies were clear, without a hint of storm, but the wind was sharp and bit into his cheeks. He was looking forward to a warm meal and seeing his wife, curling around her in bed for rest of the evening. Rec: Historical romance AU. A nice slice of life bit. Contains minor smut | 2.8k

Ray of Light by evieeden: To Thor, Jane shone brighter than any star in the sky. Advent fic for 18th December. Rec: A sweet, introspective fic from Thor’s POV. | 1.5k

just memories to hold by tosca1390: When the dust and light and smoke clears, the roof of Stark Tower is still intact. Jane can still feel the surge of power in her fingertips, thinks she could hear the songs of Asgard, feel the chill of Jotenheim, as the bridge built itself through Yggdrasil, Thor calling her name across realms. And then, a shadow falls over Jane. Rec: A really, really great post-Avengers reunion fic. Contains some smut | 3.6k

set with the stars by hariboo: jane tries to teach thor earth’s stars. tries, being the operative word. Rec: Jane and Thor getting distracted by each others’ sexy is my favorite thing. Contains some smut | 1.5k

It Could Be Sweet by hariboo: Jane and Thor traverse their last year of high-school. However, they didn’t expect it to be together. Rec: I am not a big fan of high school AUs, but if they float your boat, this is definitely worthwhile. Contains some smut | 7.8k | Part of Let’s Be Young Forever series

Thunder Whispered Low by Niobium: Rec: I love it when Thor talks about his magic, and the bridge that makes between him and Jane. Contains minor smut | 1.5k

Specularity by Niobium: Jane’s bad day improves significantly with a little reflection. Rec: A great slice of life fic, really, really nice interactions. Contains very minor smut | 3k | Part of the Jane Foster Works series

My Blood is Singing by Niobium: Sometimes Thor pushes a storm a little too far. And, sometimes, the storm pushes back. Rec: Jane and Thor at their domestic finest, with some internal angst and the simple comfort found with another person. Contains smut | 2.9k

All my faces are alibis by agirlnamedchuck: Thor is strong and stubborn and she thinks she could be a good king. Maybe even a great one. Besides she’d never seen herself as queen anyways. Rec: Genderswapped Thor. Fosterson is minimal, but amazing insights into Thor’s character. | 6.5k

Leaving On An Airship by Rozilla: To escape to a better life, Jane Foster, maid to a cruel villainous Baron, must leave her lover and disguise herself. But not before one last goodbye. Rec: *cartwheels into the sun* FOSTERSON STEAMPUNK WITH SMUT AND FEELINGS OH GOD SEND HELP. Contains some smut | 2.6k

Unrememberance by letthesongtakeflight: Before he became the Huntsman, he was a prince. Rec: Marvel/Snow White and the Huntsman fusion. Prequel of sorts to SWatH. Angst on angst. Major character death | 1.2k

steal my heart 'til kingdom come by tosca1390: Her eyes stray over reading upon reading; she thinks she can taste the tang of energy and ozone even now, and that strange sense of pine and smoke that she associates with Thor. Rec: AU post-Avengers where Thor goes to visit Jane who has remained in New Mexico. Yay for a great collision of two characters who absolutely did not prepare for any of this. Contains some smut | 2.1k

fingerprints that leave me covered for days by tosca1390: It is not all lost, to be stranded here. Perhaps, he could make something of it. Rec: Another AU in which Thor is on Earth longer in the first movie. Great development for Thor, and the relationship he has with Jane feels very real. | 5.5k

journeys end in lovers’ meeting by tosca1390: Solitary moments in snow; it sounds conducive to rest, to a time of rejuvenation before her research resumes. Rec: A really cute AU based on the movie The Holiday (which I’ve never seen before). Just adorable holiday fluff wherein Thor is human. Contains some smut | 19k

Bound by Medie: It was ironic that his and Loki’s greatest mistakes had led to her. Rec: Some tame bondage featuring dom!Jane. Contains smut | 1.1k

Rated E (these will contain the smuts unless otherwise noted)

**Ambush by orphan_account: Jane isn't into violence, but there's something about those SHIELD debriefings, something primal and raw about hearing how the bad guys got their asses handed to them by the good guys, something that inspires her to act on instinct alone. Rec: If you’ve got a thing for Thor’s armor.... mmmhmmm. | 1.1k

Is This More than You Bargained for Yet by Anshin Archives: Thor and Jane's first go at sex. Jane's expecting Thor to have a cock, and is surprised when he doesn't. It doesn't take her long to adjust. (Pure porn for the excuse of writing Thor with a vagina.) Rec: Genderfluidity and completely accepted queerness for the win. | 2.5k

When Jane Pegged Thor by waldorph: They raise them slutty in Asgard. Rec: What it says on the tin. Pretty damn hot if pegging is up your alley ;). | 1.4k

Practical Magic by Rozilla: Freya’s flowers can do funny things to you. Rec: Roz is the queen of smut so this is amazing. Kind of a play on sex pollen, but takes it in a totally new, refreshing direction. Asgardian sex magic for the win. | 2.8k

built on the old rivers by fartherfaster: You catch her wrist and delicately kiss the bone of it. “Nothing to be sorry for,” you tell her. She composes her reality in absolutes and theories and the true phenomenal names of things. Colloquial language is not her means of communication. You like her hard lines, her curiosity, her determination. Jane would never call Mjolnir just a hammer, and that puts a small, needy part of you to rest. There is a storm in the desert, and Thor comes to terms with all of his changes. The one where human-Thor has Lichtenberg figures. Rec: Incredibly poignant and the author makes a second-person POV work incredibly well. | 3.3k

Tell Me Something New by hariboo: "Compile the data of the reading we took during Convergence. The gravitational–“ She trails off, can’t finish the sentence out loud or in her mind, her voice catching on the words as Thor’s mouth latches onto her throat. Rec: Cute and hot and perfect because smart Jane is Thor’s biggest turn on. | 1.5k

On the Throne by murdur: His insistence that she should sit on the throne had been in jest and merriment, but the sight of her sitting upon the seat now makes his heart beat quick and steals his breath. Rec: Oh my god, Thor goes down on Jane while she sits on the throne of Asgard. I have nothing else to say. *dies* | <1k

Experience Counts for Something by Rozilla: Jane was surprised at Thor’s new female body- but pretty keen to explore it. Rec: Bisexual Jane and Genderfluid Thor are great. Some hot femslash fosterson. | 2.3k

Just Get In The Van by paxnirvana: Written for a prompt on Anenko’s Bad Sex & Awkward Romance: a comment-a-thon that got away from me. Rec: All first time sex is gonna be awkward, friends, even if you’re Jane and Thor. Might as well enjoy the ride. | 6.3k

close your eyes and count to ten by fuzzy_paint: Post battle, Jane and Thor make sure the other still lives. Rec: Reassurance of safety sex is hot. Sue me. Still manages to be angsty too. | 2.4k

We Woke Up In The Kitchen by hariboo: He didn’t think he could miss someone as he missed her, but there is something singular in Jane that pulls at him and threatens to overtake him. Rec: post-TDW sexies that are adorable and awkward and hot all at once, plus some really nice conversation at the end. This author just really gets Jane and Thor in a way that is always awesome to read. | 3.7k

A Helping Hand by fuzzy_paint: Jane can’t sleep. Thor has a solution. Rec: Some nice, cute sleepy!smut to help Jane to relax and stop thinking. | 1.5k

The Scientific Method by Serious Snugglebunnies: Thor is much too honourable to have meaningless sex with Jane - but will he do it for the sake of science? Rec: Cracky, hilarious, and hot. | 3.3k

A Thorny Situation by GreenVelvetCurtains: Jane has a problem and she’s not afraid to try and solve it. Rec: A hot fantasizing/masturbation piece starring the lovely Jane Foster. | 2.7k

Detours by ancarett: Life is a highway. Jane takes Thor on the detours. Missing moments from the movie. Rec: Some mildly awkward sex which is actually kind of adorable and works out for everyone in the end. Not my favorite smut ever, but worth a read. | 3.9k

Say It’s Okay by theleaveswant: Darcy gave her a sympathetic pout and walked around the table to put both hands on Jane’s upper arms. “Okay. Honey? I know this isn’t your preferred way of handling things, but it looks like you’re going to have to talk with him.” Rec: Big premium on 'consent is sexy.’ Jane teaches Thor how to pleasure her. Not my favorite smut, but worth a read. | 2.1k

Accretion by RC_McLachlan: "You are burning inside,” Thor whines, rolling his hips again, and she rides it out helplessly, eyes rolling back, lungs cramping with envy for air. “Like a star." Rec: A seriously hot look at the simple difference in size between Jane and Thor. | 1.6

Salt On Your Lips by Barkour: The strawberry daiquiri is indeed a drink worthy of adulation, but Thor prefers the taste of Jane Foster. Rec: For it’s sense of fun that comes with the sex, and the pure happiness of two people who simply enjoy being in each other’s company. | 2k

Good Morning by me: Jane wakes up with Thor between her legs.My addition to Fosterson Week’s smut day. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 2k

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year by me: Jane and Thor do Christmas. (Finally.) Tis the season for holiday smut. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 5.4k

Your Highness by me: Jane wants something in bed and Thor is more than happy to oblige. For the first day of Fosterson Week, post-TDW. Rec: It’s not a true reclist without a self plug. | 6k

Not Your Average Star Trek Fanfiction by me: After several years of unresolved sexual tension, Jane and Thor are in quite a rush to rectify the situation. Takes place immediately following TDW. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 3.7k

[sarasfm]

Sarauniya “ Sara ” Davies, 24, pansexual, cisfemale, ISFP Enneagram 9w1; Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Pisces rising 1st year Advanced Encryption Major; did not go to a spy prep hs

Imma keep it real with you, chief, I have absolutely no idea what’s going on. I mean, obviously, I know what espionage is ; I’ve read books and articles, and I’ve seen Spy Kids and all the Charlies Angels and James Bond movies, but I genuinely think I need a minute to wrap my head around everything. Make that two weeks, because what’s this I hear about two murders ?  I literally just got sent here to be safe, I — I’m sorry, I’m freaking out. Give me five seconds, and we can start again, because I promise I can totally pretend this is all normal. @gallagherintro​

full name: sarauniya “ sara ” davies

dormitory room: 105

birthday: 20 march 1995

soundtrack: “ go gina ” by sza

favorite dish: efo riro

aesthetic:  when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of light reflecting from her earrings, eyeglasses perched on top of her head, and a caviar iphone always in her hands

Bio Points

her mom’s a nigerian baddie billionaire & her dad’s a soft academic brit

she grew up between london and abuja where their family’s business is based. it’s a trading enterprise, the largest industrial conglomerate in sub-saharan africa

she’s the eldest of three siblings, was raised to be prim & proper and groomed to run their family’s business. her family’s not pushy though and they’re really cool. very healthy dynamic so she doesn’t mind ; she loves her fam and would do it w a smile !

Coding is her Passion though. total dork. stayed up all the time just sleuthing and being an internet geek since she was a youngin’

loves education and is the type who would willingly stay in school to learn. has a degree in economics from harvard and was almost done with her mba when her littlest sister got abducted !  was it about business ? money ? who knows ! the sister’s fine now but her family sure is Scared especially since sara’s alone in the big bad united states

her mom made some calls and went “ gimbiya, look, u aint safe n we sorry. we’ll work something out to make sure u get ur mba degree somehow but shit is wild so we gotta get u somewhere near that’s safe asap. u like studying & ur a geek with computers right ? cool beans, go back to school & welcome to gallagher, babe ”

she enters gallagher in the middle of the spring semester very overwhelmed & inwardly ignoring how unhappy she is about having to be here bc she is not & does not want to be a spy. she just tryna distract herself by looking at this entire thing as a weird vacation where she can do stuff she wasn’t able to before because it’s literally detached from the world. she is mostly probably in way over her head, but let’s see ! 

Other Information

Nicknames: Sara (to everyone), gimbiya (to family, means princess in Hausa)

Languages: English (native), Hausa (native), Arabic (C1), French (B2)

Strengths: is money a strength ? also coding. and being the sweetest. and a general smartypants but that’s in a university setting & gallagher probably doesnt give a fuck

Relationship History: only has one (1) experience. ( well,,, 2 if a three-second drunken kiss w kass counts ) his name’s royce and they’ve known each other since their bougie secondary school back in britain. started dating at sixteen and went to harvard together. they’re long term as fuck. he’s like her best friend and their families adore the couple & each other. got engaged last september and sara broke it off before leaving for gallagher, oof. she deadass milked the opportunity but lbr she wasnt rlly Feeling It so she’s kinda glad for the ‘valid reason’ to appear bc it rlly wasn’t Love for sara so boy bye

Physical appearance: 1.76m, 55kg, long black hair, slim and toned build

Classes: GEN 105, GEN 206, AE 101, AT 101, PE 101

Personality

the sweetest. v charming & sensitive to others & curious about things. enthusiastic too ! loves adventures & is very passionate. queen of empathy. 

she’s not stuck up even tho she loaded. she doesnt rlly talk abt her family having 12B or the fact that she’s an ivy league girl, bc she’s just generally very uwu 

easily stressed and flustered and overwhelmed ! man, gallagher’s gonna shook this goddamn academic dork to her core for the love of god someone pls get the aed ready

rlly fun !!! can be a lil unpredictable bc it b lyk dat for rich girls. loves her independence which she hasn’t maximized bc of her ex fiancé & responsibilities but it’s chill so chill totally chill, no ounce of further longing exists in the crevices of this girl’s heart

she is so not good with confrontation and is so allergic to conflict ok. she will sweep discomfort under a rug and lie on it ‘til it’s flat which makes her a queen of repression & conforming

is she easily overwhelmed & stressed ? yes, but she’ll try not to show it so much. it’s all mostly an internal monologue so don’t underestimate her pls. she’s v smart and competent. can be so competitive ( albeit mostly inwardly ) and a boss ass business bitch like her business momma bc that’s what she’s been training for altho she is still generally a soft bab so ... yeah, if u would be so kind as to Estimate her, that’d be grand

she needs to always be on top of her game. maybe not the best in the class, but definitely pushes herself to be her best, so a lot of late nights studying & won’t settle for bad grades ever. gonna be rough in gallagher bc she is not spy material ok, she’s just a pretty rich geek behind a computer

just imagine her as the nice girl in ur ap classes who’s a lil awkward & just so happens to be super hot & stinking rich

Fun Facts

has a six-month old rescue pup named sooty ! who kinda looks like a sheparnese

has a tendency to ramble if she’s comfy w u enough or mayhaps if it’s too much man 

is v diligent w keeping a journal & does it everyday 

likes to dance ! not super good but she likes it. hits da clubs for dat shit 

is a lil instagram famous bc she’s a gorgeous rich harvard girl & all that jazz. queen of selfies & of looking hot but doesn’t actually get to play around rip ffff 

doesn’t drink much bc she is an extreme lightweight and 2 is her tap out limit

if she’s had more than 2 drinks, she is Very Honest but still very ramble-y 

she is physically active but mostly just runs and does yoga. knows very basic self-defense. is not sporty, definitely not a fighter, may god have mercy on her soul

isnt a virgin but is not sexually experienced lmao lbr she kinda Itching to get out there 

don’t ask me what her accent is because i have no clue it’s all over the place

Established Connections — just bc i think y’all would like to know

kassandra sutton — internet friends ! loves kass to bits. have known each other since sara was 14. when kass was 18, sara took her on a grad trip to montreal and became a lil lowkey into her. doesn’t help that kass drunk kissed her & doesn’t remember lmfao. poor sara told her then-bf & they had a lil fight but they made up bc sara didn’t talk to kass for months. eventually they became friends again & now sara’s in gallagher w no idea that kass is a mf sutton & honestly, my girl is just very shook w everything 

Possible Connections

crushes — she does not know how to flirt. she is ,,,, p pathetic tbh but a real heckin cutie. will be super nice to ur bab ok  

flirtationships — sara and i r gonna continue to keep it real w u chieves, her ex fiancé royce was vanilla and bland as fuck. can u believe she has not been single in a decade ? ? someone give her love & attention & fluster this soft innocent child. get her Experienced but also dont hurt her

enemies/angst !!! —  or maybe do ! maybe hurt her. maybe obliterate her. maybe smash her poor heart to pieces, because tbh i would love that.  so someone pls for the love all things holy and divine, someone hurt her !!!!

fwb — probably just one (1) bc she’s still a romantic ? and she’s probably gonna want something exclusive even if it’s no strings attached and will surely want to ,.,. get to know them a little bit more first ,,, at least ideally , idk , maybe impulse & thirst gets the better of her one of these days who knows lets find out !

friends !!! — sara will love u ok. she may be a lil easily flustered but she’s doesn’t rlly give up on ppl quickly. as i’ve said, queen of empathy. probs feels v sorry for majority of the gallagher & georgetown kids bc, .,.,., this environment just screams highkey Trauma to her and she’s valid bc she’s right

mentors !!! — she hates feeling dumb ok she Always has to be on top of her game, so u can bet ur ass after her first meetings in her classes she goes to ppl going “ hey could u help me out w working out ? boxing ? firing a gun ? literally everything & anything ? ”   

anything & everything — meaning just come @ me & let’s talk about it uwu 

( did i just create georgina’s antithesis ? fuck yes, and i am sooo excited to have a child that’s not always plotting & scheming & being mean like y’all have no idea ;_; nywy, that was long bc shutting up and brevity are things i do not possess. whats up it’s ur og flower garden girl rose here aka bugleweed aka fiancée of many and lover of all, and i am open to anything and everything ! just drop an IM or hit dat like & ill slide in ur dmz w love, plots & sanitized hands x )

[scaredofrobots]

Nightmare Before Christmas

Shout out to @petalstofish for BETAing and explaining Tumblr and @beks21 for telling me it didn’t totally suck. 

Prompt for Jily October:  It’s Halloween at Hogwarts but Lily’s already humming Christmas music on rounds and James wants to kill her.

also on FFN

It is a fact universally acknowledged that come October, people can be divided into two factions.

Those who live for leaf piles, pumpkin patches and Halloween.

And those who turn the calendar to October 1 and begin the 84 day countdown to Christmas.

Now, James Potter always paid particular attention to Lily Evans. Somehow though, October had always been an exception to this rule. Because James Potter lived for the bliss of cooler weather, the beginning of quidditch and planning the annual Halloween prank. In the month of October, James had other things on his mind thankyouverymuch and couldn’t be bothered to know what kind of October person Lily Evans was. 

He knew, of course that her eyes sparked the most in the winter. She practically glowed in January, especially on her birthday week. He knew she was melancholy in March, whimsical in April and that she would take any dare she was given and make you regret it in July.

Through no fault of his own, James had missed the inaugural pronouncement of “84 Days until Christmas” on October 1st in their first year due to an unfortunate accident with the giant squid; missed the distribution of “pre pre Christmas cookie taste test” on October 11th their second year (detention); the Christmas tree catastrophe of their third year (quidditch); the Christmas knitting party in fourth year (quidditch); the mistletoe mishap of fifth year (holding a leaf in your mouth for a month sucks); and he was unaware of the failed 84 day advent calendar of sixth year (the giant squid really needed to give a man a break).

So when James picked Lily up for rounds he was taken aback when he heard her singing “Good King Wenceslas” in their office.

 “Lily… are you ready? It’s time for rounds!”

 As she flung the door open James swore he smelled pine, gingerbread and plum.

 She responded with too much enthusiasm for a Tuesday, “Oh yes sorry! Lost track of time. Tis the season, you know?”

“Right. Well shall we take the usual route?”

“Of course!” She said with a overly cheery laugh and off they went. 

Rounds were the usual banter and discussion of quidditch, classes and gossip. Near the end of the second hour however, Lily began to hum. Now, Lily always started humming when they’d run out of typical conversation and normally James enjoyed it. She’d introduced him to at least five new bands in the few months they’d been dating. But tonight, tonight surprised him. He swore he must be having some sort of auditory hallucination. At first it was “Good King Wenceslas” which he figured could be a tune that had a variety of lyrics. By the time they got to astronomy tower though, James was positive Lily was humming “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas.”

He racked his brain on how to approach this. They’d entered a tentative friendship at the beginning of sixth year and had fallen easily into something more than friends over the summer (a man can only stand being bested in Muggle poker for so long before he has to make a move). They hadn’t had a fight since they started dating and he didn’t want to start now.

“Hey Lils…what’s today?”

The humming stopped. “October 3rd- only..” 

“28 days until Halloween I know”

“Right! I forgot! I was going to say only…”

But they were interrupted as was typical of rounds by an excited couple and the conversation was cut short. After losing rock-paper-scissors (14/25) James had to fill the appropriate paperwork, owl the heads of house and create the rounds schedule for the next two weeks.

He was halfway to the kitchens for a pick me up when he decided he needed to seek the advice of one Remus John Lupin.

The dorm was a mess as usual and he was unsurprised to find Remus studying, Sirius braiding his hair and Peter trying to beat himself in Wizard Chess.

“Ah ha!” Exclaimed Sirius “The prodigal Prongs returns”

“Did we have a meeting planned?” squeaked Peter as his knight destroyed his other knight. 

“No, no. I just finished rounds.”

“And how were rounds?”

“Interesting”

 Sirius twisted his expression, “Interesting, what did you and Evans catch Filch and McGonagall in the astronomy tower or something and felt the need to tell us all the gory details?”

“No! God No…I just….” He can’t quite define why he is so bothered by the events that transpired so he starts, “Well rounds were great as usual… but then Lily starting humming”

“alas-“ exclaimed Sirius “not the humming! Not the waxing poetic ‘Pads I swear it feels like home’ humming!” 

“How shall you survive the humming?” Peter agreed dramatically, following Sirius’ playful jest.

“I never thought humming could be beautiful until rounds with Lily Evans.” Sirius mimicked James’ voice and James frown deepened.

Peter clasped his hands like he was praying and said through snorts of laughter, “And I just keep thinking I could hear that humming to our child as she puts them to sleep.”

“Oi! I never said the bit about rocking a kid to sleep”

“Yes you did” was the chorused reply

“Right, well normally I enjoy her humming. But tonight she bloody well went through every Christmas tune known to man.”

The response was not what James had expected. He had expected protesting, outrage at the blasphemy and Sirius dramatically storming toward the head suite to have one of his “chats with Evans”.

 He did not expect Remus to simply pick his book back up, Peter to laugh and Sirius to say “Right. Well- you know how Evans gets”

 “No I do not know “how she gets”. It’s October 3rd. We are nowhere near the reasonable time to begin singing Christmas songs”

 Remus shrugged, “I’m with you mate, but for Lily that timeline is different. I mean the girl begins knitting Christmas jumpers in July”

“I think the worst was in third year when she tried to teach me how to knit”

“Honestly Wormtail it isn’t that hard to cast off. Evans did turn your monstrosity into a lovely scarf” 

“I do love that scarf” Peter said wistfully.

 “Personally I think her worst attempt was last years advent calendar” Remus added, unhelpfully.

Just as the conversation was about to spin totally out of control James countered “What. The. Bloody. Hell. Are. You. Lot. On. About.  I know everything about Lily Evans. I would know- I would have to know if she was a - a- “

He couldn’t finish his sentence so Sirius finished it for him, “Pumpkin abusing, Halloween skipping, heinous pre Christmasophile?”

“YES! How could I miss such a glaring flaw?”

 “Lilytober” they chorused again

“Stop speaking all at once!”

“Remus you tell him” Peter motioned pathetically to James.

 Calmly, Remus set down his book and started “Lilytober is the great and time honored tradition where one James Potter does not mention Lily Evans for 31 days because he is manically preparing for quidditch, the annual pumpkin carving contest and the Halloween prank. In his absence, Lily Evans pushes her pre Christmas agenda on all of us but we do not mention it because it’s a fair trade to have 31 days of rant free bliss”

“We, of course, knew that this year would be different since you finally got Lily to agree to go out with you” Sirius said, “Lilytober- may it live in our hearts forever and ever”

Ignoring this James said “So, you mean to tell me….everyone…..everyone in Gryffindor tower knows that Lily Evans is an absolute Christmas nutter who ignores the sacred month of October and all that autumn holds except me?”

“All of Hogwarts knows Prongs”, Peter added unhelpfully.

James pressed his fingers to his temples, “I need a drink. Or 5. Or to reevaluate the kind of woman I fall for.”

How there always seemed to be a stockpile of Firewhiskey in the dorm, James would never know but he was appreciative of Sirius and his ability to keep a constant and much needed supply. 

On the 5th shot James had an epiphany , “I’ll just convert her!”

On shot number 6 Sirius responded “Convert her to what? You’re talking crazy mate”

“No, no, listen. I converted Lily from borderline hating me to being my girlfriend. Making her see that October is for spooky things and not Christmas should be easy. I just have to show her all that October can offer. Pumpkin carving, setting off explosives, scaring first years. Come October 31st we will never remember Lily unnecessarily singing ‘Good King Wenceslas’ on October Third Again”

“Good luck with that mate” Sirius said into shot number 7.

The next morning dawned bright and early and although they had planned a lie in to deal with their hangovers they were awoken by the smell of coffee and someone singing

“Good Christian men rejoice

With heart and soul and voice!

Give ye heed to what we say

News! News!

Jesus Christ is born today!

Ox and ass before Him bow

And He is in the manger now

Christ is born today!

Christ is born today!”

 Amidst the groans and complaints of “Fuck, Evans, it’s only Wednesday” James heard the love of his life respond “Wake up gents, I’ve got coffee and hangover potion and Minnie is already looking for you Sirius so you better get up and at them” before she kissed him on the head told him “see you in potions” and whisked out the door. 

“How does Lily always know when we’ve been drinking?” Peter asked, pulling pumpkin pasty from nowhere and taking a large bite

“James never tells her goodnight on our drinking nights so she always prepares a ‘Hangover Cart’” replied Remus grabbing the sole cup of tea.

Sirius’ grey eyes looked at the hangover cure lovingly, “Moony, if I ever leave you for someone it will be that mad Christmas bird. We’d be dead without her”

James chucked his sock at Sirius playfully, “Oi! That’s my mad Christmas bird”

After a day of too many loud noises, bright lights and general discomfort, James decided that Operation Spooky Lily could wait until the weekend.  He had much too much homework, his quidditch team was looking like rubbish and they didn’t even have a draft of the big Halloween prank. So it was on the way to Hogsmeade on October 7th that operation October went into effect.

As they walked down the path to the village James took Lily on a detour to Hagrid’s pumpkin patch.

 “I thought we could skip Hogsmeade today and celebrate the beginning of October properly, by carving pumpkins and roasting seeds” James told her as he pulled her from the usual path.

“But James, I wanted to go to Madame Puddifoots and snuggle- we haven’t  been to Hogsmeade since we became official” Lily whined, but with a twinkle in her eyes that made him retaliate with a slight pinch on her side.

 “I don’t know why I started dating someone as sarcastic as my best mate.”

“Because your best mate was already dating your other best mate and Peter is just there as a cute accessory?” Lily guessed.

“I’ll have you know Peter brings a lot to our group dynamic.”

Lily just rolled her eyes, let go of his hand yelling “race you” before running to the pumpkin patch. 

James Potter learned that afternoon that Lily Evans had never carved a pumpkin or eaten pumpkin seeds. After recovering from this shock, he promptly showed her “the proper way” to cut and gut her pumpkin (he was glad Sirius wasn’t around or there would’ve been a 4 hour debate). After two hours of carving, throwing slime on each other and catching roasted pumpkin seeds; they revealed their masterpieces to each other.

James had carved an elaborate black cat wearing a witches hat that looked suspiciously like McGonagall. Lily had carved a shape that looked suspiciously like Santa Clause. 

“Lil- is that”

“Santa? You know him? I wasn’t sure if it was just a Muggle thing or-why are you looking at me like that? I know his beard is a little off but I think the hat is clear enough”

She looked so pleased with herself and worried about his approval, the rant bubbling up from his core died on his lips.

“It looks brilliant. Now let’s go drop them on some Slytherin’s heads” 

After thoroughly checking off “pumpkin carving prank” on the Operation October checklist, James knocked out “haunted house” , “leaf piles”, “dying Mrs. Norris black” and “charming all the cauldrons into jack o lanterns” with Lily at his side in no less than two weeks.

Things were going so splendidly James often forgot there was an operation unless one of the boys asked. It was October, he was pretty sure he was in love and his Quidditch team had never looked better. Nothing could take James Potter down.

That was of course until the morning of October 21, the day of the Gryffindor/Slytherin match when his beautiful girlfriend came to breakfast, not in the agreed upon James Potter quidditch jumper she had worn to matches since February 6th year after an unfortunate accident at breakfast but a blinking twinkling jumper that had a red nosed deer embellished on it.

Taking a deep breath, counting to ten and trying to not curse James prompted “Lily, dearest…what are you wearing?”

“My October 21 jumper. It’s Rudolph the red nosed reindeer’s birthday and I wear it every year”

“Lily” James said through gritted teeth,  “It’s a Quidditch day”

“You’ll survive one game without me wearing your ‘lucky jumper’”

“Rudolph will survive one year without you wearing a bloody Christmas jumper in October!!!” 

Lily drew back, “James Potter I do not like your tone.”

This, for some reason was the last straw, “Look- if you’re not going to wear my jumper and insist upon wearing that blasphemy in October then don’t even come to the match, alright?”

“Fine” Lily said coolly, “but don’t expect me to show up to the post match party either”

And then she left. James watched her go.

Miraculously and despite his girlfriend’s absence and refusal to wear the proper attire- Gryffindor won. James was so thrilled (and trashed) he had completely forgotten why and what they had fought about until he asked Marlene “where’s Lily?” and Marlene started shouting about reindeer and birthdays and “if you can’t love October Lily you don’t deserve Summer Lily” and shouting until his head hurt.

His only response was “It’s bloody October and no reasonable person should even look at a Christmas jumper until November 1 and you can tell her that.”

The party died down soon after and James did not emerge from his room the next day. He was doing what any reasonable bloke in a fight with his girlfriend would do, hide and avoid.

This was going remarkably well. He only ate in the kitchens, arrived to all classes at the last possible second and left as soon as the bell rang. He even switched with Remus to do

Wednesday night rounds so he wouldn’t have to be alone with Lily that Friday. He was sure he could successfully avoid her until graduation even instead of Benji Fenwick waiting for him in the great hall, there in a hideous Christmas jumper stood one Lily Evans.

“I thought Remus had rounds” she said in her Best Head Girl voice.

“He did. We switched”

“If I was going to be stuck with one of your lot for rounds I wanted Remus”

 “Your lot again, is it?”

“Let’s just do rounds I’m too tired to do this now.”

“Nice jumper.”

 “Thanks. It’s my ‘two months till Christmas’ jumper” 

Rounds had never been so awkward. Their interactions had never been so awkward. Total silence. So when Lily started humming James was almost relieved. That is until he realized what it was.

 “Can you stop humming please?”

She did. Two minutes later however she started singing “Oh the weather outside is frightful”

“Lily”

“But the fire is so delightful”

“Evans”

 “And since we’ve no place to go”

“Please.” he asked weakly.

“LET IT SNOW. LET IT SNOW. LET IT SNOW!”

“WOULD YOU BLOODY STOP. I don’t understand how the girl I’m dating could possibly sing that song on October 25.”

Lily crossed her arms and smirked, “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud to all to hear!”

“ITS OCTOBER.”

“it’s only -“

“I don’t care how many days it is till Christmas. I don’t care about your ruddy jumpers. I just care that Halloween is in a week and for no discernible reason you have decided that my favorite holiday should be besmirched with Santa and Rudolph!”

Lily tossed her red hair over one shoulder, “I just love Christmas. Christmas is my favorite” 

“Christmas has enough! It has a whole church season! Halloween doesn’t have anything.”

Lily scoffed, “IT’S THE BIRTHDAY OF JESUS!”

Taking a step back, James said “maybe we should just- take a break until November”

“No,” Lily stated, “if we can’t even resolve this fight we should just end it. It was good while it lasted but maybe this is a sign.”

For the second time in less than a week, Lily left and James let her.

 The next 7 days were transformative. It felt like 5th year again. Lily and James existing in separate bubbles. She was as good (if not better) than James at avoidance a fact he was more aware of because Sirius kept complaining of “that red-headed banshee trying to get out of our much needed ‘Chat with Evans’”

On Halloween morning, James couldn’t even be encouraged by their impending Best Prank Ever when the final nail in his coffin was delivered by Lily Evans flirting with Some Ravenclaw Bloke. Lily Evans who was a vision in some Christmas jumper that he was sure she called “her Halloween Christmas jumper”. Some Ravenclaw Bloke has just made her laugh and she was leaning over his shoulder to look at something. James realized he hadn’t looked at her in over a week and he had forgotten how lovely she was.

“That is it!” Sirius exclaimed.

Sirius threw down his bacon and stalked over to Lily, told Some Ravenclaw Bloke to “get bent” and dragged the redhead from the dining hall to what James was sure would be the most terrible “Chat with Evans” of all time.

As he started to imagine the lecture Lily was sure to get regarding Some Ravenclaw Bloke his thoughts were interrupted by Remus

“You know I hate to meddle Prongs but maybe you need to rethink this whole argument”

“It’s October Remus” 

“I know but maybe this is Lily’s Thing.”

“Thing?”

 “The Thing you have to accept and then maybe try and understand. Lily didn’t get quidditch and was against it until she became our friend. She doesn’t like that you broke the law to help with my furry little problem but she respects it. You’ve got Things that she accepts about you.”

“She never told me she had a problem with any of that.”

Remus stared at James pointedly, “Because she loves you, you idiot, and didn’t want you to feel guiltier than you do.” 

James swallowed deeply, “I’ve fucked up.”

Returning to his crossword, Remus said “I’d dare say you have.”

 “What do I do Remus?”

 “A grand dramatic gesture should do the trick.”

“But when?”

“The post feast party tonight. I’d say the actual feast but Lily is taking Samuel’s shift for rounds.”

“Who the bloody hell is Samuel?”

“The Ravenclaw she was talking to- he’s a prefect and wants to enjoy the feast with his boyfriend. Honestly, I thought you were head boy?”

After the realization that Some Ravenclaw Bloke was alright, James and Remus started plotting. Peter joined them after divination and at their lunch break in the kitchens Sirius arrived looking grim but smug.

“How was the ‘Chat with Evans’” Remus asked

“Bird is bloody stubborn. I also told Some Ravenclaw Bloke to leave my mates girl alone”

“who?” Asked Peter the same time James said “she’s not my girl”

“Samuel” Remus responded and there was a firm “Yes she is” from Sirius

“She won’t be if we don’t get the fuck to work” mumbled James.

The feast was excellent, the Best Prank Ever went off without a hitch and got a standing ovation from all the houses and professors. The fireworks were successful and didn’t catch anyone on fire. In the Gryffindor Common Room the Halloween Costume Party was in full swing. The Grand Romantic Gesture was all set up but the lady to woo was nowhere to be found. James felt absolutely ridiculous in his costume but Remus assured him it was the right choice. He was ready to abandon all hope when he heard a “trick or treat” from behind him.

He turned around to see the sexiest pumpkin of all time. Lily was wearing green tights and a ridiculous pumpkin costume. She was perfect and all James could say was “Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas” through his pull on beard. With these words all the floating pumpkins began to sing

“We wish you a Merry Christmas

We wish you a Merry Christmas

We wish you a Merry Christmas

And a Happy Halloween!”

“I’m sorry” they said together

 then, “I love you”

Lily said with a laugh, “Happy Halloween, Potter”

“Happy Christmas, Lily”

And then they kissed.

Once James took off the beard.

[thecuriouscrusader]

Destiel prompt: sick day! Just fluff or whatever

A/N: Oh God, I’m so sorry. I actually posted this on Ao3 a couple of months ago but somehow I forgot to post it here :S I’m just really sorry and I’m not gunna bother listing off excuses, but I hope you like it x

In Sickness

WhenCastiel woke up he almost cursed the decision he had made to give up his graceso that he could live a mortal life alongside his beloved Dean. He had apounding in his head and a soreness in his throat which he could no longer makevanish in an instant; and somewhat ironically it was all his beloved’s fault.

Dean hadcomplained of similar symptoms the previous morning, and he had sneezed soloudly that Castiel was surprised that the bed posts did not shake. The hunterhad grumbled about catching a cold off a ‘snotty little brat’ who belonged to afamily they had saved from a vengeful ghost. 

Castielhad insisted that he rested for the day, and after thinking about the effort itwould take just to put on a pair of pants, Dean had obliged. He had then whineduntil Castiel agreed to stay with him, and somewhere in-between the cuddlingand cups of tea the germs had been transferred. 

 Castielsat up rather suddenly when he felt a strange sensation course through him;like his body had seized up. He sneezed loudly and Dean shot up next to him.

“S'atan earthquake?” He mumbled, his mind clearly still caught in a sleep idledstate. “Cas, get down!”

“No,I sneezed” Castiel huffed and he pulled a tissue from the box left on thebedside table and blew his nose solemnly. “This is so unpleasant.”

“Crap,I’m sorry, baby” Dean said as he placed a empathetic hand on his husband’sback and rubbed it soothingly. “When you said you wanted us to share stuffmore I don’t think you meant this.”

“Absolutelynot. My head and my throat hurt too." 

"Ah,well, I guess we’ll just have to spend another day in bed together” Deangrinned. “And ain’t that just awful?” He added sarcastically.

“Youare enjoying this far too much” Castiel scolded, but there was also a hintof a smile as he allowed Dean to pull him back down under the covers.

“Hey,I barely get to spend any time with my baby because of all those monsters wehave to worry about, and if we have to be a lil’ sick to do that then so beit.”

“Alright”Castiel conceded. “But I need to get some medicine first.”

“Nope”Dean said sternly as he quickly spooned Castiel from behind and gripped tightlyonto his waist. “I’m not letting you out of this bed” he murmured ashe nestled his face into the crook of Castiel’s neck. 

“I’llonly be a few moments, my love.”

“Toolong” Dean stated. “Besides, we have a giant man-child who owes meafter years of taking care of him myself. Sammy!” He yelled and instantly regrettedit as it caused him to cough harshly.

Theyheard footsteps coming down the hall before Sam cautiously stuck his head intothe room.

“Yeah?”

“Cashas caught my cold so we’ll be in bed again today. Get us some more medicineand a pot of tea, would ya?" 

"Sure.Will that be all, Master Winchester?” Sam sarcastically retorted.

“Yes.Thank you, Jeeves.”

Samrolled his eyes despairingly before leaving.

“Dean,you shouldn’t exploit your brother” Castiel reprimanded. “Surely youare feeling better today?”

“Alittle” Dean confessed. “But not so much that I feel like lifting afinger." 

Castielsmiled lightly. "I suppose some extra sleep would be beneficial, andhuddling for warmth would also be…nice.”

“Thensay no more” Dean urged.

Castielrolled over to allow his husband to pull him into his arms. He nestled into thewarmth and safety of Dean’s chest and closed his eyes with a contentedsigh. 

He feltDean press a gentle kiss to the top of his head before he drifted offagain. 

WhenCastiel woke up he found that Dean had switched on the TV to a low volume andwas mindlessly mouthing along to the words of a Dr. Sexy episode. The hunterhad managed to pull himself more upright, but he was still stroking Castiel’shair affectionately. 

“Dean?”Castiel said groggily.

“Hey,baby. Got the meds for you” Dean said as he grabbed the bottle.“Well, Sam did.”

“Thankyou” Castiel said as he took the cap full of gooey liquid from Dean. Heswallowed it with a grimace. “I think.”

“Sorryyour tea has gone cold; I didn’t want to wake you up.”

“That’salright” Castiel sniffed. “Although, I am rather hungry.”

“Noproblem. I’ll ask Sam to-”

“Dean”Castiel said sternly.

“Alright”Dean sighed. “I think I can muster up some tomato soup.”

“I’llhelp” Castiel said; he would feel guilty if he was the only one still inbed.

“No,you have to stay here” Dean insisted as he got up and pulled on his 'deadguy’ robe and slippers. “Because if I’m leaving this bed then that meansthat you are left with one of the most important jobs in the universe.”

“What’sthat?” Castiel asked with wide and fascinated eyes like a child being tolda fairytale.

Deanleaned across the bed and looked his husband directly in the eyes.

“Keepthis bed warm.”

Thehunter grinned and planted a kiss on Castiel’s cheek before heading out of theroom.

Castielsmiled from amusement at his husband’s antics, but he was also going to take onthe task which Dean had set him with great seriousness; the former angelappreciated anything which made him feel like he had a purpose.

He daredto briefly leave the bed so that he could use the bathroom, but on his returnhe stopped at various spare bedrooms to gather as many pillows and throws as hecould carry.

As soonas Castiel returned to his and Dean’s own bedroom he made quick work ofconstructing a soft and warm nest for them.

Once hewas satisfied that every pillow had been perfectly placed, Castiel scrambledunder the covers and spread himself out so that his body covered as much of themattress as possible.

He smiledwith delight and could have easily fallen asleep again as he closed his eyes,but Dean returned only a few minutes later with a tray supporting two bowls ofsoup and a fresh pot of tea.

“Awesome,you made us a nest” Dean grinned.

“Well,I tried” Castiel replied. “Although, it is somewhat better than theone I had in heaven; I’ve always been a better solider than a craftsman.”

“Itlooks super cosy to me” Dean said as he handed the tray to Castiel so thathe could snuggle down next to him. “And well done on completing yourmission.”

“Thankyou” Castiel said with a smile before placing a peck on his husband’scheek. 

Castielpoured them each a cup of tea to set on either bedside table and then passed abowl of soup to Dean.

“Itsmells wonderful, my love” Castiel commented. “At least…I think itdoes. My nose feels so stuffed.” He put a spoonful in his mouth andrelished in the warmth it provided, the creamy texture with a hint of spice.“It tastes wonderful too.”

“Thanks,it’s kind of my own creation” Dean said. “I call it 'whatever thehell we had left in the refrigerator’”.

Castielchuckled. “Catchy.”

“Youwanna find something else to watch?” Dean asked. 

“No,I have to find out who stole Doctor Sexy’s cowboy boots.”

Dean’sface lit up and he opened his mouth to say something but Castiel put a fingerto his lips.

“Nospoilers.”

Deansighed and pouted as Castiel lowered his finger and smirked amusedly.

“DidI ever tell you how much I love you?” Dean asked.

“Everynow and then.”

A littlewhile later and two empty bowls and cups with the last dregs of tea in thebottom were placed forgotten on the floor. Dean and Castiel were huddledtogether in the centre of the bed surrounded by used tissues and still feelingworse for wear, but content with simply being in each other’s company.

They hadmanaged to get through a full season of Dr.Sexy which Dean considered a daywell spent.

As theevening drew on Castiel was beginning to feel drowsy again; as he restedagainst Dean’s chest the rhythm of his steady heartbeat was very lulling.

With thebunker being such a huge place made of concrete and stone it easily grew coldat night and it was hard for the heat to circulate, and now with his illnessCastiel found himself shivering easier than usual.

“Youalright, sweetheart?” Dean asked concernedly as he gave his husband a softsqueeze.

“Justa little cold.”

“Howabout we take a bath?” Dean suggested.

“Yes”Castiel said with a soft smile. “That would be nice.”

“Alright,I’ll look into my secret bubble bath supplies and you get naked” Deangrinned eagerly.

“Dean,we are not using this as an excuse to have intercourse” Castieldeadpanned.  “I really don’t feel up to it.”

“Iknow” Dean replied innocently. “You wanna get in the water with yourjammies on?”

“No.”

“Giveme five minutes” Dean said before mustering up the strength to leave thesoft and warm sanctuary which they had created.

Castielwatched the clock on the wall tick until exactly five minutes had passed beforehe removed his clothes and put on his robe and traipsed down to the bathroom.

He foundDean reclined in the ceramic clawfoot tub which was filled to the brim andtopped off with a thick layer of bubbles. 

“Comeand join me” Dean said with a smirk as he dragged his arm through thesuds. “The water’s fine.”

“Willwe both fit?” Castiel asked with a frown.

“Wellif we don’t then chick-flicks have lied to me about the size of bathtubs.”

Castielstill seemed skeptical but he tentatively stepped forward and removed his robe.Dean had to remind himself that this was not about making a sexual advance ashe took in his beautiful husband in all of his glory.

“Bestseat in the house” Dean promised as he brought his legs up and pressed hisknees against either side of the tub so that Castiel could sit between them.

As soonas Castiel stepped into the warm water he felt every ache he was feeling beginto melt away. He sat down so that his back was leaning against Dean’s stomachand rested his head on his husband’s firm chest.

“Wefit perfectly” Castiel concluded as he closed his eyes.

“Good,because otherwise I’d have kicked you out” Dean teased as he started tomess about making bubble beards on Castiel’s chin; he couldn’t tell if Casdidn’t notice or he just didn’t care. “This is my best stuff.”

“Whatare you doing?”

“Seeingwhat you’ll look like when you’re old” Dean said he as added bubbly muttonchops to Cas’ new look. “I’d still do you.”

“That’sthe most romantic thing you’ve ever said to me” Castiel responded lazily;his eyes were still closed as he was actually finding the whole thing soothing.

“Wasthat sarcasm, Mr Winchester?” Dean asked with mock surprise.

“Itcertainly was, Mr Winchester. Besides, I’m already very old.”

“Iknow, but now you have the pleasure of becoming wrinkly and gross likeme.”

Castielsmiled. “As long as you keep taking care of me then we’ll bealright.”

“Throughsickness and in health” Dean reminded him as he wiped Castiel’s faceclean; he didn’t want to push his luck. “Speaking of, how are you feelingnow?”

“Warm…relaxed…happy”Castiel murmured; Dean could tell that that he was on the cusp of fallingasleep again. “You?”

“Youtook the words right out of my mouth” Dean said as he wrapped his armsaround his husband’s waist and sunk a little further down into the tub himself.He delicately kissed the base of Castiel’s neck and across his shoulders.

Castielsighed with content.

Perhapshis decision had not been as regrettable as he had originally thought.

[ladyymontilyet]

drace, do you have any idea what you've done?? i'll ask for 01, 02, 04, 10, 12, 13, 21, 28, 32, 33, 39 and 50

bunder a read more bc i talk!!!! too much!!!

1. When did you first start writing?

Uh. Ok so I have two technical starts-- if you mean writing and sharing my writing, I was maybe ten or eleven, and I posted MLP fanfic to quotev and soon after got into RPing in the Hetalia fandom. If you mean writing as a hobby in general it wasssssssss grade five. We had to write short stories and I know mine was probably pretty bad (all I remember is it was some sort of retelling of the whole King Arthur mythos, or what I knew of it at age 8/9 lmao) and I really, really liked it. Which is why I still write, and also definitely a direct result of my reading habits when I was small bc I was. super far in reading as a kid to the point teachers were frustrated that I walked into grade two with my dad;s old copy of The Hobbit and could explain Harry Potter better than the student teacher. That’s off topic, tho, but what I’m saying is I’ve always been really proud of my lit skills lmao

2. What was your favourite book growing up?

This is going to come as a shock to anyone who has spoken to me for more than five minutes but I loved The Hobbit by J.R.R Tolkien with my entire being growing up. I also loved this lil information book I had on beluga whales bc I had a thing for beluga whales.

4. Have you ever thrown a book across a room?

Like from reading it and getting a plot twist??? No. I’ve probably tossed a textbook to pass it to someone tho??? Usually when a book hits me with shit I close it and take a few seconds to be like “F U C K”

10. What’s your biggest writer pet-peeve?

From a writing standpoint or a reading standpoint??? Both. Ok both uh from a writing point I hate wanting to write, and having the motivation and time and words but when I put things down and it all feels wrong and I slowly get more frustrated at myself and my writing until I doubt if I’m even a decent writer at all. From a reading standpoint it’s when authors don’t fucking use commas. they exist. use them. continue. a. sentence. for. more. than. two.. words. if. ur. not. making. a. point. (im looking at u hunger games u piece of shit)

12. Who is your favourite author?

god dont do this to me elfie shit ok uh. I’M NARROWING IT DOWN TO TOP 3 bc I really dont have a favourite???? I like authors and stories but rarely would I follow an author just for their writing. 

1 J. R. R Tolkien (shocking, I know)

2 V. E Schwabb (I BOUGHT ADSOM ON A WHIM AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH I preordered the collectors edition despite it coming out in like. 7 months)

3 Rick Riordan (listen i love his style of storytelling it’s got quirk and its relatable in that it doesnt force jokes or sarcasm, ALSO the pjo series is??? prime for OCs)

13. What’s your favourite writing quote?

I’m taking this a lil liberally but. Directly related to writing and story-telling, I really love this one from Varric Tethras in Dragon Age II (its also the quote that like. solidified how much he resonates with me as a character like gosh) and it’s “ There’s power in stories, though. That’s all history is: the best tales. The ones that last. Might as well be mine. “

And talking more liberally for creating in general, it’s that longass one from RVB15 where Vic talks about creating, and that a world without stories is empty space and im tearing up typing these quotes oh gosh

21. Do you outline?

oh no. ive done it once maybe??? but that was for a class project so. i wing it and sometimes i go back and edit but mostly if i post something it was a one run thing haha

28. Which do you find hardest: the beginning, the middle, or the end?

Beginnings for sure 100% 

listen i can jump in and get to it and put things together and plan for them if i need to and i can wrap things up so im satisfied but???? for some reason not setting the scene up while running with it is hard for me and i always find the beginnings i rite feel awkward and clunky and i dont like that when the rest of my writing feels mmore flowy. bleh.

32. How do you feel abut friends and close relatives reading your work?

first rule of my writing is that i dont show my family because i dont. idk i just dont. thinking of showing them makes me uncomfortable and even my dad, who im close with, doesnt get to know anything bc i know he’ll make it a joke and hurt me without meaning to

as for close friends im???? it depends. My online friends have seen my riting a lot, most of them I became friends with through roleplaying, so I’m super lucky to have seen that same side of them as well, and I’m always willing to show them my writing. Real life friends is.... mroe iffy. I’ve had some of them read my writing in person, and usually it makes me really anxious and flustered bc I’m a mess. the only person irl that I really trust with my writing without feeling too iffy on is my best friend but. first of all I’ve known her nearly a decade, and second of all she knew weeb me in person, and put up with that every day, so I know she’s seen me write worse. Idk immore open showing my work online thatn I am in person.

33. Are you interested in having your work published?

outside of fanfiction, I’d like to one day. I’d like to pt a story out there and have people like it and fall in love with my characters because writing means so much to me, and???? it’d be fucking magical to touch someone like I was as a kid in books but first of all I can’t carry a plotline and second of all I doubt that anything I could write would be worth it. there’s always gonna be something better, and that’s fine but especially since I focus on fantasy whenever I write my  own ideas it wouldn’t go far.

long and short of it is I’d love to because I’d love to be able to reach out to people like authors did to me with their work as a kid, but I doubt I’d ever get there.

39. What’s the weirdest story idea you’ve ever had?

I’ve had this idea kicking around for the longest time about how the universe unravelling was an accepted problem in life and ive thought of ways to branch it in but. usually it just sits lmao

50. If you could live in any fictional world, which would it be?

Now, normally I’d sayMiddle-Earth right away, and don’t get me wrong I’d love to live there too, but at the same time, Red London from A Darker Shade of Magic is really appealing too lmao. Maybe Thedas, even???? Gosh. I’d love to live in plenty tbh