#god this is such a stupid idea

[ashanaxe]

I’m sorry but everytime i come across evil peppino

i think of him.

[onnahu]

I want a batfam fic where Jason dissapears, so Steph and Cass break into his place to investigate, and all they find is a note like that:

I got married and am now on a space honeymoon, where we get married at every single planet we can.

Xoxo

Jay

Ps.

Whoever found it - Get everybody's (especially B's) reactions on camera and give to me as the best wed gift in the world, and you'll be my favourite forever.

If you're B - Fuck you, you always ruin my fun, and you're not allowed at my place, so if it's you I hate you. Fuck you, B.

Is it a joke? Did he really eloped? And with who? Because he sure as hell didn't tell anyone. Like, WAS HE EVEN DATING?

Anyway, Steph and Cass have a blast out of it.

[kitamars]

im not immune to mermay it seems

[katabay]

”—ah. seems like mother goose has been playing around in your egg salad. if you won’t dance to that tune, I got others.”

honestly, the would you kindly scene is whatever to me*, code yellow is the more interesting violation/betrayal of the body because of how beautifully it escalates the Fontaine reveal/betrayal and shows how ugly some of those ‘locks and keys’ that Tenenbaum mentions are. not only have you been a tool in another man’s hand this entire time, it goes deeper. your body is not your own.

*there used to be a meandering thought here about the would you kindly scene, but it was really just talking around the fact that I spent way too many years seeing people discuss it in the most insufferable and reductive ways possible when it’s a combination of three or four other things that make that moment compelling lmao

collage credits: heart one/heart two

⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / tip jar!

[writer-room]

Listen when people say they want Percy to go on a villain arc most times I see it as they want him to go dark, want him to start murdering, maiming, going full Luke, etc. And I support that. If anyone deserves to kill people it's this kid.

However, let us be realistic for a moment, because I quite like the other alternative. Villain arc Percy usually entails "he's finally had enough of the Gods bullshit & will do things his own way". Let us think on this. What would Percy most likely do in this situation? Would it really be murder right off the bat?

I think he'd be the pettiest, annoying little shit there is. And because one can't usually threaten the Gods in a way that truly matters, but they can make them sweat really hard.

This goes beyond ignoring their calls and leaving them on read. He refuses to give food offerings unless it's the nastiest shit known to man. Bribes the cyclops into hucking huge objects up Mount Olympus before they all scurry off. Finds the olive tree Athena gave to Athens, and while he wouldn't have the heart to destroy it, he'd for sure rip off a branch & mail it to her (Annabeth nearly had to put them in witness protection).

Eventually it gets to the point he has Nico on speed-dial and offers him a shit ton of fast food & a 'get out of Percy's quest bullshit free' pass if he could hop into the Underworld and yoink up some annoying spirits or dead monsters to piss off the Gods. When the Gods get pissed at him Percy just silently pulls out some safe-for-demigods phone like "hang on I wanna see how many happy meals I owe Nico for bringing Typhon back up". They know he is not bluffing.

Could the Gods counteract him? Yeah, sure, Hera gave him amnesia and it was like 90% effective for a while. However, he kind of went off the rails, everyone else went off the rails, and then they had even more Roman nonsense to deal with. If anything it both solved but also made even more problems. And a much angrier Percy. So, frankly, they're very confident it could work, but they're a little worried about what the aftermath would be.

Ares suggests just killing him. Poseidon takes offense to this. Artemis scoffs and says even Ares couldn't beat him. Everyone stops for a moment. The question is not asked verbally. But it is seen in the darting eyes and shifting seats.

Can they kill Percy Jackson?

Well, sure, they must be able to. He's a powerful kid, no doubt, with powerful allies, but they are Gods. Of course they can kill him. So that's not the real question, they wouldn't dare really entertain such a thing to ever confirm if it was true, but this is rather the layer of frosting hiding the real atrocity of a cake underneath it.

What will they lose trying to kill Percy Jackson?

What will remain standing in the face of some 18-year-old who lived one of the hardest knocks of life, loves so much it makes them sick, is so completely unaware of his own strength not even they know its full extent, and currently has absolutely zero fucks to give about the end of a reign longer than he will ever understand?

They decide to quietly shut the lid on that whole fiasco and let Percy do whatever he wants.

Unfortunately, they can't exactly ignore everyone else. And everyone else is who Percy cares about the most. So, think of it more like leaving a grenade in a locked box in the attic. Just hope and pray you've moved out before something gets curious and starts rummaging around up there.

[buwheal]

do you think theyll notice

[palossssssand]

Bingewatched fullmetal alchemist brotherhood and my fav is this pathetic beast

[soarrenbluejay]

Can’t remember where I’ve seen the idea first but I’ve had this idea of Regular Clowns taking offense to joker’s bullshit for a while now and exacting Vengeance. The man doesn’t even has an egg! His ass never been to clown school! He’s a disgrace to them all!

So four buddies leaving the traveling circus business decide as people who have loved every second of this and are Deeply Insulted by this wanker to Do Something About It.

Three of them are showmen- an acrobat, a juggler, a fire fanatic, the works.

The last one, Jerry, is a stage hand. He is their most powerful member- not only does he have the superpower of self care, but he’s a meta! Minor telekinesis is actually really useful when shuttling stuff around in a stage in a hurry! (And that whole thing of our idea of ninjas coming from stage hands in all black being ‘invisible’ yeah. Cryptid vibes, except it’s just Jerry)

So. A clown car pulls up in Gotham, in the middle of a Joker attack, presumably despite ever Gothamite on the road who saw it making their best effort to take one for the team and mow them down. This is a no good awful sign for Gotham.

But it gets better.

Because out does not step a bunch of goon reinforcements in masks, or some jokerified poor soul, but instead someone in one of those historical jester costumes, bells and dramatic ass sleeves and all. Also, they’re bright orange. It is slightly eye searing. In one hand is the end to a long line of tied together handkerchiefs in clashing neon colors which appears to be infinite bc it just keeps coming. In the other is a comedically oversized hammer with a squeaky sound effect installed but no spring to soften the blow- it in fact has spikes with little Mayfair banners hanging off.

They immediately attempt to strangle/bash Joker to death with a winning smile firmly in place, and actually survive the attempt of which by apparent virtue of being made of rubber or something. And out slides our fire master, in all teal for contrast, who promptly throws smoke bombs at the crowd of goons around and starts all but boa staffing them down with his fire wand, paired with a dramatic speech about how Joker is in insult to the idea of circus and also the most unfunny bitch to ever walk the earth.

Lastly, the juggler. They have come armed. With glitter and hackysacks. A dramatic beatdown ensues, with much shrieking and yelling on all sides. A gif is made of Joker being bonked right through a concrete wall with a move right out of a video game. Several goons get concussions a la bowling pins. It’s all being live streamed by someone through their apartment window and is rapidly going viral. It’s a good time mostly because this attempt at vengeance against the Clown Bitch Gotham did not immediately involve some one getting very anticlimacticly shot.

No really takes note of the guy in all black and ski mask, calmly standing in the middle of the flaming chaos. He occasionally holds out a new set of props for the juggler, an oversized great sword for our acrobat jester, some nitroglycerin for blowy uppy efforts, the works. Until he starts calmly putting together a three story set of scaffolding for the gang to use for the purpose of beating the crime king’s skull in in even more ridiculous ways and also so jester can showcase their absolute lack of a spine.

And Jerry goes back to standing in the middle of this chaos, apparently unaffected by Literally Everything going on. His friends are fucking crazy, he’s used to it.

Meanwhile, Ghost King Danny gets a new urgent appeal at his ghostly royal desk- someone is attempting to enact vengeance against the joker and move approximately 46363883 souls along doing it, except it’s not the Red Hood this time! It’s Some Random Guys that a minor mischief god is now attempting to fast track layering with blessings! Said minor god is officially appealing for the Ghost Monarch’s support. Danny is conflicted- on one hand, he Fucking Hates Clowns. And has a major hero worship thing going on for Red Hood, a fellow supernatural hero (in the dead’s eyes) much his senior. However, the idea of a bunch of nobody’s beating the joker to death at the same time as declaring how shit of a clown he is IS pretty hilarious.

He gives it the stamp of Yes, provided others seeking vengeance (aka red hood, the thousands of joker victims in Gotham, anyone who wants to go spectacular viral) can still intervene to catch some own hands, a minor merriment/will of the people god does a jig on the spot, and back with the Justice Circus Brigade, ghouls and Spectors alike start popping up to join in on the fun! Which our beloved ren faire rejects are actually pretty okay with- big enough circus events in the DC universe have a bad habit of becoming possessed/very obviously haunted/Ooky Spooky like, every few months. And these guys look much friendlier than whatever the hell has been in the house of mirrors these last few months!

Red Hood isn’t sure how he’s suddenly in the middle of upper Gotham when he’s was decidedly Nowhere Near three seconds ago, but that’s a problem for later when the Bitch Ass Clown Extraordinaire is Right There!! So he tables it to be very paranoid about later, shrugs, and starts shooting. Jester starts shouting out points for accuracy/comedy, Jerry calmly asks if he wants some of their backup silver bullets just in case The Target really is an unholy being of some sort. (They have taken Precautions. For Everythinf. Or at least Jerry did.) Jason can’t say no to free extra ammunition and also That’s Hilarious, man he has to hire these guys!

Then fire juggler molotov’s the joker, and he decides these idiots are ABSOLUTELY worth saving from the big bad bat. Fuck it, this morons are the BEST.

[pup-pee]

he is the dirt under my fingernails

[indilaras]

process of elimination

this is the kind of quality content that happens when you're an Alhaitham main with Cyno's sense of humor.

Also here's the unobscured joke ramble:

So I've gone over the 'elimination' as in eliminating enemies already. While simple, it is genius in how easily applicable it is in every fight, from Spectres exploding to Treasure Hoarders escaping. Other than that, the full phrase 'process of elimination' itself refers to a logical method to identify an entity of interest among several others by excluding all other entities; this is likely the obvious meaning that you want others to catch first. After all, you once went on about your strategy in combat being "finding the weakest link" before letting everything else resolve itself, so it seems like an obvious connection. Hence why I didn't start from there. We also can't forget the use of the word 'process' is also relevant, since typically you start the fight with your Burst, hence this line starting the process of eliminating your foes.

[firbolgfriend]

Im just yapping but there is this fic on fimficton called Discord of Tomorrow that’s about s2 evil discord traveling forward in time right before he can be turned to stone to switch places with the version of himself (reformed discord) that exists when the elements of harmony are gone, so reformed discord gets stuck in the past and has had to snap away and hide the elements of harmony from the mane 6 so he can focus on trying to get back to the future without getting turned to stone, all while dealing with the moral dilemma of him realizing how easy it was to take the elements and how easy it would be to seriously just take Equestria over again vs being worried about what evil discord is currently doing to his friends in present time. It’s only like three chapters but I think the plot is so funny and the author didn’t even get to the part where evil discord is in the future and the mane 6 is trying to figure out wtf his problem is, thinking he has amnesia or something. I want to make a comic expanding on it so bad I’m like seriously obsessed with it I can’t stop thinking about it

[quirkle2]

i have GOT to stop drawing things for fics i haven't written yet

[jesterjaxx]

Peak duntrent pining stupidity hours of Trent writing love songs that are very obviously about Duncan but just switching the pronouns

and Trent asking Duncan what he thinks and Duncan the fool that he is tells him he hates them but in reality hes just absolutely burning with jealousy he refuses to acknowledge

[moongothic]

Okay okay okay, so, during Marineford when Sengoku announces Luffy's heritage to the whole bloody world right in the middle of the war, we see everyone important react to it except for Crocodile. For Crocodad Truthers, this could be because Crocodile's reaction to the news (finding out that the idiot child who beat his ass was actually his own son) could have been very telling and Oda couldn't show it to us at the time

And this kind of begs the question then; what did Crocodile's reaction actually look like? Did he just freeze in the moment in cold sweat and utter horror, trying to process the words Sengoku had just said? No, it can't be, that's impossible, Strawhat doesn't even look like Dragon, there's no fucking way it's him! ...But, it's not like he could know for sure, he didn't know what Dragon named the child, and Strawhat was unusually sturdy, and how did he get Ivankov to help him anyways, unless--!!

But also Crocodile's reaction could've been just

[finalgirlgretchen]

if one more person tries to claim that the oh hellos are no longer christian i am going to lose my shit

[waywardskychaser]

Okay so maybe I’m stupid but I just wanna clarify:

Taliesin = Wildmother

Ashley = Everlight

Laura = The Raven Queen

Noshir = construct sent by the Lawbearer

Abubakar = The Arch Heart

Nick = Dawnfather

Right?