#going into this life transition kicking and screaming

[thresholdbb]

Y’all, Voyager infinite rewatch is coming to a close

[homunculus-argument]

Being an adult and seeing other people with their kids really makes you understand why and how so many cases that you'd think are obvious examples of child abuse go unnoticed and unreported. It's not that they're not protesting loud enough when they're in distress, but because they also do that when there's no life or death situation at hand. You wouldn't notice a child being kidnapped when you've learned that they'll also fight their parents kicking and screaming when they simply do not want to go into the car. Not because being in the car hurts or because being in daycare is a traumatic experience, or because sitting in the car would be in any way a worse state of being than standing on the street next to the vehicle.

Just fuck this specific transition in particular.

[vax-merstappen]

keep coming back (mv1)

hi y'all, my first attempt at writing angst!! i feel like max verstappen angst hits different so i wanted to give writing some a try. lmk if you enjoy this and feel free to send fic ideas to my inbox!

summary: you forced max out of your life a few months ago. but when he keeps coming back into it, why can't you get him out of your head?

warning: swearing, alcohol, breakup, angst

Max Verstappen. 3 time world champion. One of the greatest Formula 1 drivers of all time. Red Bull Racing's star. Your ex boyfriend.

With his fame, you found that Max was becoming more and more insufferable to be around. Everything about his life focused at becoming a better driver, fine tuning himself to be even greater than great, a legend in the making. That usually meant that he wouldn't have time for you. Between long hours at the factory, various press appearances around the globe, and spending every spare moment on a simulator, you were in his life but not really in it.

The final straw was when he forgot about your birthday dinner and instead went out with the CEO of one of his sponsors, getting wasted on the company money. You had called him in tears, shouting that you never wanted to see his face again.

You had woken up the next morning to 32 missed calls from Max and a long string of drunken text messages telling you that he would do better. You responded by telling him that you were blocking his number and to stop trying to contact you.

You were done with Max Verstappen.

---

But of course life never goes to plan.

You had a life to live and you weren't going to let the breakup stop you from moving forward. You gathered all your girls to go out to the clubs in Monaco and forget about everything bad that had happened in your lives. You picked out a stunning, sparkly dress and a matching pair of heels, knowing that looking your best would help you feel your best.

Your best friend got an Uber to take you to her favorite club, the one where you all had spent her last birthday dancing until the manager kicked you out. The second you walked through the door, the loud music rushed through you like a breath of fresh air. This was what you needed to forget him.

After a round of shots, you and your friends rushed onto the dance floor. You swayed to the beat, your hands in the air. You screamed the lyrics to the song at your best friend and she screamed them back at you. Eventually, you two were holding hands and spinning in circles laughing, as if nobody could see you.

When the song ended, the group walked back over to the bar to get more drinks. Before you could order, one of your friends suggested you try another one of the other Monaco clubs that she heard celebrities liked to frequent. You happily agreed. What better way to rub it in to your ex than to meet up with a different celebrity?

It was a short trip to the next club and your friend got you in the door so quick that you didn't even bother to see which one it was. The music was just as good as the last one, and you quickly found your best friend whisking you out onto the dance floor again. Your heels were starting to hurt, but that didn't stop you from moving your hips to the rhythm and continuing to scream along to the songs with your best friend.

It was only when the DJ transitioned to a song you didn't know, that you excused yourself from the dance floor and went to grab another drink at the bar. You were having a good time, but you knew more alcohol would make it better.

That was when you saw him.

Of course Max would show up to the same club that you did. You averted your gaze and started trying to blend in with the crowd, but it was too late. He had seen you and was making his way over to where you were standing. You made a move to try to bolt away, but you felt a hand grab your arm.

"Fuck off, Max!" you shouted, trying to push away his arm.

"You're the one who came to my favorite club," he responded. You looked down at the napkin in your hand and mentally cursed when you saw his cat's name on it.

"Didn't mean I wanted to find you here."

You thought you could see him sigh, but the music was too loud for you to know for sure. "Look, when you told me you wanted me out of your life..."

"I meant it," you said, interrupting him before he could get any further. "So go away and let's act like I never saw you here."

The look in his eyes saddened and he let go of your arm. "If that's what you really want."

You peeled away from him before you could change your mind and you beelined for where your friends were standing.

"Let's go. He's here so I don't want to be. here"

Getting the message, your best friend began to lead the group back out of the club. As you walked, you couldn't help but look over your shoulder. He was still standing at the bar staring into an empty glass, the typical confident look that he always had seemingly gone. He looked as handsome as ever, though you wouldn't accept that your thoughts had wandered in that direction.

Fuck him for being so hard to forget.

---

A week later, you had decided to go on a date with a guy who you had met on a dating app. Your heart wasn't really in it, and maybe that wasn't fair to the guy you were meeting, but you needed to get Max out of your head.

Marcel was nice enough, but he had a tendency to ramble on about things you weren't interested in. And worse, he was a Formula 1 fan. You had been pretty private about your relationship with Max, so you knew he wasn't on a date with you to get with Max Verstappen's ex-girlfriend, but it was awkward to hear him go on about how if Charles Leclerc was given a great car, he could rival Max.

The fancy restaurant was the only thing keeping you there. Marcel had told you he would pay and there was no way you were passing up on dessert. Just as your Creme Brulee came out to the table, you happened to see the absolute last person you wanted to see walk into the restaurant and towards the private room at the back.

How did Max keep appearing? Monaco was a small country, sure, but not small enough that you should keep running into him like this.

But as Marcel began to talk about what DRS meant and how it could impact a race, you realized anything would be better than hearing him mansplain a sport you had watched for most of your life. You had deleted his contact from your phone, but his number was still in your call history. You excused yourself from the table and pressed tne call button.

"Hello?"

"I'm in the same restaurant as you. Would you take me home?

"I thought you never wanted to see my face again."

"Maybe that was a bit extreme. I need to get out of here and you're the only one I knew would say yes."

"Who says I am going to say yes?"

"Look, I know you. I know I hurt you when I broke up with you that night. And I know you aren't over it yet."

There was a moment of silence.

"Alright."

You went back to the table and told Marcel it had been great but that you didn't think this was going to go anywhere and that you needed to leave. He began to spew a long string of angry words at you, but halfway through he sputtered to a stop and his eyes went wide.

You felt an arm around your shoulders and you turned to see Max standing there. You couldn't help but smirk at the way he had silenced Marcel.

"Let's go," Max stated, pulling you towards the door. You waved at Marcel and followed your ex out of the restaurant.

"Thank you," you whispered.

"He was so bad that you called me?"

"If I had to listen to him talk about how Lewis Hamilton was robbed of his eighth world championship for much longer, I was going to lose it."

Max snorted. "I must have really surprised him then."

"He didn't know what to do with himself."

You spent the rest of the walk to his car in silence. There were no words that could repair what you had said to Max and what he had done to you. You still were mad at him, but you couldn't help but feel drawn back to him. After all, he was still the only person you knew would answer every time you called and would drop everything to make sure you were safe.

When you sat down in the passenger's seat, you took a deep breath. "Look, about what I said..."

"Don't."

"I just want you to know..."

"I said don't. I've been a dead man since you left. Don't give me hope of living now."

"Just let me at least apologize. It was too harsh."

"And I should have been there for you. I was so focused on myself that I forgot about you. I'm sorry."

A moment of silence passed as he pulled into the parking space for his apartment.

"You can't apologize, Max. I'm supposed to hate you."

"And you're supposed to be the one that got away."

You held back a sob that you had been keeping in ever since you broke up. "I don't want to get away."

"And I don't want to be the one you hate."

You pulled yourself together and opened the door to the car, grabbing your purse and stepping onto the street.

"Goodnight, Max."

"Goodnight."

---

Another week went by and you couldn't help but keep thinking about what had happened that night. He regretted not making more time for you. And he had felt dead ever since you had left his life. It was hard to hate him when he said things like that.

In one final effort to get Max out of your mind, you decided to get out of Monaco altogether, take a trip to London to visit some family who lived there. You booked a ticket on the first flight out, eager to get out of the place that reminded you of Max as quick as possible.

But fate wouldn't let you go.

Engine issues on the plane was what the woman at the counter told you when you saw your flight was cancelled. No other flights for London were leaving that day and so you were stranded at the airport, unable to get to your destination.

Annoyed at the situation, you posted on your close friends story about what was happening. You got a message from your best friend, commiserating with you about the situation. You saw a text message from an unknown number and you clicked on it.

Max.

Of course you had forgotten to remove him from your close friends. And of course he was flying to London today for some meetings at Red Bull's headquarters. And why wouldn't he have had room on his private jet for you if you wanted it.

It was either wait until the next day to fly out in a cramped economy seat or get on your ex-boyfriend's private jet. The choice was easy.

He had someone escort you to the private terminal of the airport and you soon boarded his jet. As you walked through the plane, he was nowhere in sight. The man who had brought you here had told you to take whatever seat you wanted, and so you picked one that looked unoccupied near the back. You put on your headphones and looked out the window.

A minute later, you felt a tap on your shoulder and looked over to see none other than Max. You knew he would be here because of course it was his jet, but you hadn't expected him to appear so suddenly. You took off your headphones to hear him.

"I was sitting in this one," he said, a look of slight embarrassment on his face.

You mentally screamed. Of course you would accidentally take the seat he was sitting in.

"I'm sorry, I'll just move..." you mumbled, grabbing your bag and starting to walk towards the exact opposite end of the plane.

"Wait!" Max exclaimed. You turned around. "Would you sit across from me? I would like that a lot."

You almost blurted out no, but something in your mind stopped you. This was Max, the man who would drive you home, who missed you, and who cared about you whether he showed it or not.

"Sure," you whispered and slid into the seat across from him. You put your headphones back on and watched as the plane took off and the city grew smaller and smaller beneath you.

The flight was awkward. He was avoiding eye contact with you and you were avoiding it with him. Every once in a while, you both would glance at the person across from you at the same time and lock eyes before immediately looking the other way.

Eventually, you couldn't take it anymore. You pulled off your headphones for the second time. "Max, we need to talk about it. I can't take not having closure anymore. Not after that night a few weeks ago."

"I haven't stopped thinking about it," Max admitted. "The truth is, I want you back so bad. I can't take seeing you live your life without me because of what I did. I fucked it up so bad and I hate myself for it every moment."

"Max..."

"Watching you pull away from me at the club, seeing you on a date with another guy, that killed me. You always used to call me baby and now you just call me Max. I've never hated hearing my own name so much. The fact that you are doing fine without me is so hard to accept."

"Max, I haven't been doing fine without you. I can't get you out of my head no matter how hard I try. I was going to leave the fucking country to get away from you and somehow I end up on your damn plane. Why are you so hard to leave behind? And why does it feel like I don't really want to leave you behind?"

He leaned closer and dropped his voice. "For the record, I hated every time I had to leave you behind for work. It might have seemed like I wanted to go, but I promise it hurt every time."

Tears began to prick your eyes. "You can't tell me that. Then I can't hate you anymore."

"Do you really want to hate me?"

"No," you whispered. "I don't want to hate you, Max."

"I still love you, if you still have anything left in your heart for me."

"I do. But I can't just get back together with you like nothing happened. Like our relationship wasn't falling apart."

Max nodded. "I understand. But I'll be here if you want to try again. I'll always be here for you, even if you don't want to try again."

"Thank you, Max."

And just like that, the man who you wanted nothing to do with ever again had made his way back into your life. And you knew he would keep coming back as long as you would let him do so.

[appleblueberry-pie]

sweet yan gojo eats darling out or first time with gojo? (๑･̑◡･̑๑) btw I love love love love love the way you write the yandere versions of these characters

Good Boy Treatment

Satoru didn't want to be too in his head about this, but he was confident from the start that he was the only one that could please you in the ways no one else could. And the way you just confirm this for him is enough for him to be sure you're meant to be together.

You were making excuses for coming to him with your problem. But it's hard not to take it seriously as if it wasn't fact. No one could make you scream like he can. No one can make you want more of him like he can. He can be whatever you want him to be and there's never going to be another one of him. And you're like a sponge, taking up whatever he gives you. That's why you two work so well together, right?

"...right. That's why I wanted you to be the one to do this for me....please." You shuffle a little, nervous of doing this for the second time in your life. Too long ago since the first time you've done it to be confident in how you're gonna react. You told him you didn't really trust anyone else with making you orgasm. So you went to the only one who really carries himself like he knows what he's doing. And to think he wasn't capturing your attention. Here you were underneath him.

You liked when he kissed your neck like this. When he held you like you were the love of his life. When his infinity was down for once and his hot skin touched yours occasionally. You liked the smell of his cologne and the silver chain around his neck. His deep voice praising you just for letting him do this. Thanking you, even.

He was heavy handed, putting pressure down harshly in his rubs on your clit, making your core ache way more than it would if you were doing it to yourself. Maybe you were desperate, but you wouldn't mind doing this again if it meant he could make you feel like this.

"Do you like when I rub you like that?" Yes.

"Want me to touch you here, too?" Please, yes.

He takes off your panties and cold air hits you, reminding you of how vulnerable you were to him. His cursed energy was strong, making the entire room stuffy, in a way. He moved in ways you couldn't and it just made you glad of who you chose to bring into your bed. But you'd have to kick him out soon. Doing sexual activities with one of your partners during a mission in a different city, hotel as well, was not on your list for tonight.

His touch lightens when he observes your beauty. His covered dick rubs against the sheets underneath him and he hisses, wishing he could take it further tonight, but you need time to reach that point. Satoru stares you deep in your eyes, his mind blank and blood rushing through his veins, making him feel hot. His mouth lowers and his tongue gently caresses you between your lips to get your slightly salty essence. His eyes close as his brain melts, slowly transitioning from calculated movements to letting his natural state of his sex mind take over.

He feels you flinch lightly and gasp as he molds into your fountain, his greedy mouth taking all it can provide. You let out hushed moans, wishing so hard that he won't make you lose yourself. But with each firm caress of his muscle on your clit, you feel your hips move to his rhythm and your hushed gasps turn into thick moans of you begging him to keep doing what he does best. He keeps the same beat, deciding to open his eyes to take in your beauty.

He might soil his pants. And as embarrassing as that is on his part, he thinks it's inevitable with how sexy you look using him right now. He wishes to talk you through it, but he would rather die than stop making you moan like this. His hands move from your thighs up to your hips, massaging the tense muscles underneath your skin. Then they move up your soft tummy to your breasts and your hands cup his, urging him to keep touching you like this.

He hears you whisper words under your breath, almost too fast to catch. Keep touching me like that. Please make me cum, you're doing so well, babe. Fuck, you look so good like this.

He never thought you'd have it in you to say any of these things, yet here he is, a wet spot on his boxers from constant humping and your random praises to him. He finally detaches his lips from your warm pussy and you sit up slightly. He takes one hand to lay you back down and the other prods at your entrance gently before he intrudes with two fingers, working diligently to find your spots. And before you could complain, his fingers began hitting that spot inside of you, making you whine out a moan and he smiles at your face. "There you go, baby."

The silent wet sounds it was making with his fingers inside, hot, comfy, and so wet makes him wish he was inside. He wants to feel you give to him not only with your words, but with your body. He wants to feel how you feel. He wants to give to you and take at the same time, but for now, this will suffice. You grabbed his free hand, intertwining fingers in a way only lovers do. You wanted the comfort and he felt like this could happen every day if you let him.

Face to face, he couldn't help watch you try to gather the words you wanna say to him, his one hand working hard to please you. His palm slick from his spit and your juices, rubbing against your clit constantly. His fingers inside creating that build up you were looking for. "You've been so good to me." "Not like how you are right now, Angel."

And then you smile before taking him by the cheek to kiss him, tongue and passion, slow and steady. He knows you don't kiss often, but this feels too domestic, even for him. He wants to be selfish this one time and take it further, just to let you see what you could have. To let you see how you're making him feel. You obviously have no idea. His hand changes techniques and he feels you buck your hips, swallowing your moan that you let out. He wordlessly keeps pace and lets you grind against him, finally squirting a mess on his hand, the sheets, and yourself. A mess of uncoordinated scratches make it's way from his back to his arm and other places he plans to let scar as a prideful memory. Are you gonna let him play with you for as long as he wants? Or will this end too soon?

[thrashkink-coven]

someone asked if I live with my parents, in regards to how I have such a large altar, and how they might feel ab it. I was working on a long post ab it but then it vanished into the stratosphere so idk what that was ab or where it went.

But to answer the question, making an incredibly long story short, I do not live with my parents, I live with my partner and a couple roommates.

Tea time :) ☕️ Hot piping tea time besties!!! 🤩

My mom used to be somewhat accepting of my transition and identity. She helped me in the medical care system and even got me testosterone (although she always seemed a bit iffy). However after she met her current partner that all fell apart. He is extremely, and I mean EXTREMELY Christian and extremely controlling. This man burned my bfs hoodie because it had a sigil on it. He red faced SCREAMED (and I mean SCREAMED) in my face that I was going to hell for being trans, that I was disgusting and that he didn’t want me anywhere near his kids. After which, my ✨mother✨ blamed me for pushing his buttons too much (by being trans) and told me she would no longer support my transition. She told me that she would rather burry me in the ground in the event that I lost my life to suicide than deal with having a trans kid. I will never forget that.

That was during the first lockdown at the height of the pandemic, so I was trapped in that house and it was torture. When I say that man is extremely Christian and conservative, I mean it. He forced me and his kids to watch religious videos every Saturday, which were basically just dudes screaming at you that you’ll go to hell if you sin over stock footage of clouds. He would try to guilt trip me for not wanting to participate. (Not to mention he contributed very heavily to my eating disorder by trying to force us all to be vegan and taking away all of my safe foods, despite cooking steaks for himself every night. If I could use one word to describe that man it would be “Hypocrite”. I was constantly anxious and starving, holy shit I could write an entire book about how terrible living in that house with that man was and how betrayed I felt by my mom for putting me through that)

The last straw for my mom was when I expressed to my gender therapists that I really want and need top surgery. She acted like I was springing it on her out of nowhere despite us having conversations about it since I was 14. She told me that I would not be recovering from that surgery under her roof and that it would upset her partner too much. Soon she started making little comments about how disgusted she was in the changes testosterone was giving me, how my voice was getting deeper and how I was gaining muscle, and I became terrified that she would try to force me to detransition.

For me, the final straw was after me and my mom had an argument about money (she took it from my bank account without asking and got mad when I asked for it back) as punishment she decided that I would start having to pay rent for my room in the house. I told her that I would not be paying to live somewhere where I cannot feel safe being myself or bringing my partner around. She told me to either get over it or pay up.

As soon as I turned 18 I started looking into programs in my school that help young queer people who are facing potential homelessness find housing. My mother never explicitly kicked me out (she’ll still say that to this day) but she made it impossible for me to stay. I do believe that her partner was actively trying to systematically get me and my older brother out of the house so he could further isolate my mom. He was the one that told my mom that I was manipulating her into “letting me be trans” by pretending to be suicidal. Yeah. Seriously. And to be honest, it’s fucked up and sad but I also see my mom as a victim due to some other things I won’t mention here (when I say controlling I mean CONTROLLING) But the abuse she went through does not justify her role as my abuser. As much empathy and understanding I have as to why she acted the way she did, I still don’t accept that behaviour. Constantly hearing about how you’re an abomination and how God will surely destroy you starts to take a toll after a while, especially when you’re not allowed to leave the house.

Through my efforts I landed a job but I still didn’t have enough money for even the smallest bachelor pads.

One night after having an extreme meltdown I just… ran away. I went to my bfs house because I didn’t know where else to go, but I was fully prepared to walk to a homeless shelter. I am so incredibly lucky that he and his mother are amazing and understanding people because they embraced me with open arms. They gave me a place to stay and never pressed me about money. I have never gone back to my mother’s house since. If it wasn’t for them I would not be alive right now. They genuinely saved my life and I am forever grateful to them for that.

After my bf and I finally got our own place after living with his parents for nearly 2 years , my mom decided that time passed is equivalent to an apology, and wanted to rekindle our relationship. However, after she tried to visit my place and was met by my roommates who are also all trans, things didn’t go her way. She kept asking for my dead name and misgendering me. My roommates stood up for me and told her that she should stop misgendering me and have some respect, that they didn’t know anyone by that name, and that it’s not cool for her to still be calling me that.

My mom gave me a very angry phone call, telling me that my friends are disrespectful and that they should know that she’s the only person allowed to disrespect me because she gave birth to me. Unfortunately for her that is not the case.

My response to that was this:

and her response was this:

So it was what it was. She tried to withhold my phone plan from me as punishment because it was the only thing left that I relied on her for anymore. I said fuck it, got a new phone plan and continued on with my life.

I’ve tried to have conversations with her to reach an understanding hundreds of times in the past, countless letters and one sided conversations, she was never interested. It is what it is. We haven’t really spoken since then and I’m content with that. Believe me, I have said all I could possibly say.

In terms of my paganism, my whole family subscribed to a certain genre of black conservative Christianity that sees all indigenous forms of spirituality as evil. I don’t know how much they know about my craft but I know they hate it, and that’s fine. My mom hates my dark art and wanted me to use my ✨talents✨ to make Christian art. The only person in my family who even somewhat understands me is my older brother and we have a good relationship. I am no longer concerned with trying to please people who don’t see me as a person. Those who are real will stick around, and those who won’t, wont.

I know that they probably think I’m lost and broken and using demons to fill the void, and they can think that. One thing I want to make incredibly clear is that I do not harbour resentment towards the Christian God, Christianity or Jesus Christ for the terrible actions of his followers. I came to peace with and forgave him long ago. I love him. My being a Luciferian is not revenge against my mom or God. That God has always been there for me and supported me for who I am through all of this, and he still does.

Since I was a child I’ve always been told that I don’t know who I am, that I can’t think or speak for myself, and since I was a child I have always remained 10 toes down on who I am. They won’t believe that I’m really trans until the day I die, they won’t believe that I lived a beautiful and fulfilling life as a devotee of Lucifer because they cannot fathom that I know and love myself. Oh well, they say success is the best revenge.

I love my family and I always will, but for their comfort and my safety I keep my distance from them. I’m pretty damn sure they wouldn’t want to be anywhere near me anyways with all their paranoia about the devil.

Funnily enough Lucifer has been excellent bigot repellent for me. He’s always protecting me from people who would hate me anyways. If my paganism is such an abomination that it prevents my past abusers from hurting me more, then that’s a bonus in my eyes. Stay the fuck away from me if it bothers you so much, we don’t have enough in common to have a productive conversation anyways. If ever my mother came to me honestly and sought true redemption, I would certainly forgive her, I don’t enjoy being estranged. But that would take effort and care on her part, and that simply does not seem to be her biggest priority right now, it never was and I never was. It izz what it izz 🤷‍♂️

So yeah, tldr, I definitely don’t live with my parents lol.

[animelovelover123]

Devil May Cry Boys Dealing With Your Violent, Emotional Breakdown

Parings: Dante, Reboot Dante, Reboot Vergil, Nero, V x Reader (reader is gender neutral but there are some comments that may seem to veer one way or the other)

This is a weirdly specific idea but it came to mind while trying to calm myself down from an emotional dysregulated episode. I’ve never gotten violent with people but I have trashed some things in my blind panic and rage, so the physical attacking aspect might not be too realistic. I tried.

Disclaimer: This story shouldn’t be taken as a serious representation of mental troubles or as a guide on how to deal with someone who is having an episode.

Trigger Warnings: Forceful confinement. Attacking others and (in one case) being attacked. Mentions of wanting to hurt others and yourself.

Dante

“Welcome home.” Dante greeted, fully expecting the glare you shot him considering he could hear your stomping and cursing from across the street.

Something on your mission had clearly ticked you off and Dante intended to stay out of it.

However, things change when he gets up from his desk and starts towards your shared bedroom, hoping to take refuge there while the storm passed.

You start accusing him of abandoning you and not caring about you.

“Hey now, you know that’s not what this is about.” He keeps up his joking tone, hiding the honest offense he took at your claims.

He knows that once this episode passes, you’ll apologize and tell him not to take the things you say in this state seriously.

But he also knew that right now, in this manic state, you do believe everything you're saying. He has seen it and, once upon a time, felt it himself, the overwhelming feeling that the world and every creature in it are against you.

So he stayed, still intending to let you thrash around to your heart’s content. That is until you yank a Devil Arm from the wall.

“Whoa there cowboy, no need for that.” Even in the hands of someone who couldn’t call upon the demonic power within it, a Devil Arm could still cause some serious damage. Dante may be able to handle quite a bit of abuse and any furniture crushed in your rampage could be replaced, but god forbid you hurt yourself.

He grabs hold of the hand guard and tries to pluck it from your grip but you hang on like your life depended on it, screaming, pulling, swearing, kicking, and clawing at Dante in an attempt to make him let go.

His quips and prods come naturally. He teasingly says things like “Feeling feisty today aren’t we kitten?” and “I didn’t know my sweet little kitten had claws” as the only damage you are able to do to him is giving him a few nicks with a jagged nail you had broken in your rage.

Eventually, he lifts the Devil Arm up and out of your reach.

Instead of hanging there you give up on that one. You let go and make a dash for another weapon lodged in the shop’s walls.

“Alright, playtimes over.” Dante drops the Devil Arm he had confiscated on his desk and wraps his thick, strong arms around your waist, pinning your arms down at your sides. “I’m gonna have to put you in time out.”

He lifts you off the ground with ease and carries you to the couch.

You can kick, scream, and struggle around all you want but there isn’t much you can do while in his lap, your back to him.

He holds you tight, only loosening his grip a bit if you start to wheeze, cough, hyperventilate, or any other action that suggested you weren’t getting enough air.

“That’s it kitten, let it all out.” He coos between your incoherent shouts.

When you aren’t thrashing your head around, he places gentle kisses along your shoulders and up the back of your neck.

As you settle, his iron grip transitions into soothing rubbing, messaging your arms and thighs.

When you finally relax into him and start muttering apologies for your actions and what you said his jokes soon come back in full force.

Not quite immediately though as he first assures you that “It’s alright, your fine. I’m not going anywhere.”

I briefly considered writing separate entries for different stages in Dante’s life, but I felt that the only thing that would really change was how moody he got in response. So instead, I made this general scenario and slipped in some angst. Also, I had no intention of having ‘kitten’ be your go-to nickname but the quips I came up with just fit the name so well so I kept using it ^^;.

Reboot Dante

Mocking each other, playfully arguing, and coming up with creative insults were just a part of your guys’ relationship. Being able to take smack talk and throw it right back was something Dante loved about you. And from your two’s bubbling anger came rougher kisses and better sex so it was usually a win-win.

This, along with having anger issues himself and being a generally confrontational guy, resulted in Dante not realizing that your mood was more severe than any other time you got pissy. If anything, he takes this opportunity to toy with you, having fun lighting your short fuse as you worked on a mission together.

“Aww, you didn’t get that? You know, I’d spell it out for you, but that’s assuming you know your ABC’s.”

“Oh ya, you’re totally glowing babe. But I think it’s from the radiation coming off your toxic ass.”

“You're worth every penny babe. That being said, let me show you to the discount section because I found a spot for you.”

It was all fun and games for Dante until you started making crazy claims with an all-too-serious voice.

You screamed about how much you hated the world, the people in it, and yourself. That was all relatively fine. He agreed with a lot of what you said about the assholes in the world, though not about yourself. But then you started hinting at wanting to hurt yourself.

He tells you to chill out in what may seem like his usually cocky tone but anyone who knew him well enough would have caught the twinge of uncertainty and fear that crept out.

Dante turns away from you, whips out a cigarette, and lights it. “Let’s just get this shit over with.”

Once the two of you were done with this mission and out of limbo then he could get you both something to drink to calm down. Or maybe he would hand you off to Kat.

Out of all the moments for Kat to split off to do something else, why did it have to be the time Dante needed her help the most?

He can hear you stomp after him screaming your lungs out but he isn’t in the mood to yell back anymore.

Dante keeps his glaring eyes straight ahead, his shoulders tense up, and the pinch hold on his cigarette grows stronger, denting the filter.

Then, everything escalates all too suddenly.

His shoulder is grabbed. He is spun around. His cigarette snaps and tumbles into his hand where it quickly burns a hole through his glove and skin. You’re screaming in his face, asking if this is what he wants. Theirs a gun between you two. Dante’s fight or flight reflexes kick in and his instincts choose what it always did.

He slams his clenched fist up into your gut, knocking the air out of your lungs. You drop your gun and crumble to the floor, hands wrapping around your stomach as your desperate attempts for air turn into violent coughing.

“Shit! Fuck! I’m sorry I-” Dante reaches down to you but when you, whether intentionally or not, jerk away from his shaking hand his heart drops into his churning stomach.

“Kaaaaat!” Dante turns and takes a few steps away from you. “Kat! Where the hell are you?”

“I’m here Dante.” Kat's white lucid form comes sprinting around a corner at the rare sound of panic in Dante’s voice. “What happened? Are you guys okay?” She quickly notices you curled up on the ground fighting for breath and rushes over.

“Get them out of limbo.” He orders, unable to look at your now crying face out of shame.

“What about you?”

“I’ll stay here and finish the mission. Just get them somewhere safe. Help them.” Because God knows Dante can’t. He’ll just fuck up more than he already has.

I believe that reboot Dante would, by far, be the worst at handling violent emotional breakdowns. This man can’t keep himself in check when walking down the street half the time. There is no way he can navigate someone else’s emotions. But now that he has you, Kat, and Vergil (people that he wants to protect and keep a positive relationship with) he is trying to reign in his anger around them. Bad habits die hard though. That was my thought process.

Reboot Vergil

It started with you and Vergil worrying over something having gone wrong on your recent mission. This includes your own failings, which he will point out and calmly instruct you on how you could have done better.

When he notices that you are getting far more riled up about this than usual his own negative comments lessen and eventually stop when you take on a doomful mindset.

At first, he stays calm, telling you that “things will be dealt with”, “everything would be fine”, and “no need to get so worked up”.

But as you kept yelling and start stomping around, he grows impatient, telling you to go cool off somewhere else as he tries to gently lead you out of the room.

Not taking this well you fight back, getting up in his face and screaming at him.

He doesn’t back down though, standing up straight and glaring down at you. He shouts your name at you like an angry parent trying to assert dominance and instill slight threat.

When you suddenly start physically attacking you catch him off guard and get a single good hit on him, a punch to the jaw. Any attempt after that though he easily blocks or evades single-handedly, his other hand holding his sore jaw.

He doesn’t try to grab or restrain you though, not until you turn your violence onto the objects around you two.

Ungodly amounts of irreplaceable documents were spread around the room. Terabytes of data on encrypted memory sticks. Stacks of incriminating papers. Ancient and fragile books. All were so easily destroyable and it was all the same to you in your blind rage.

So, begrudgingly, Vergil retrieves one of the pairs of handcuffs used by The Order from a draw and wrestles you into a sitting position. He cuffs your hands behind your back and around an unpowered radiator mounted to the wall.

As you thrash and scream Vergil tries to do something to distract himself, some work or making a drink. All the while one of his hands rubs his already-healed jaw as if it could soothe his non-physical pain.

Once your adrenalin runs dry and you are left sitting slack against the wall, Vergil approaches you. He goes down on one knee in front of you, making himself less threatening, though still above your slouched form.

“I’m going to take the cuff off now alright?” He doesn’t proceed until you respond with a quiet affirmation.

He unlatches each cuff separately, taking the time to gently slide each of your hands free, delicately holding your soar wrists which were red and limp from the struggle.

“Would you like something to drink?” He offers as he stands up, still gently holding your wrists, urging you to stand. When you don’t move, he places your hands on your lap.

“I’ll be right back.” He promises, stepping out of the room momentarily. He returns with a mug of water, an orange, and an ice pack.

He lays them in front of you like an offering to a goddess. He doesn’t ask for an explanation or an apology. He doesn’t ask you to leave nor does he leave you. He’ll let you reflect in silence for as long as you need while he works close by.

“If you want to talk, I’ll be here to listen, always.”

This is the first of the set I wrote (though not the first one I thought up) so it is a bit different from the others as I was still trying to settle on a style. He is also the only one in this group that would probably have actual restraining equipment on hand to use on you and would know how to do it. The order does some shady shit so you’re not the first person he has had to tie up. Though you are the only one to get such nice treatment after ;).

Nero

Despite the fact that Nero is guilty of violently lashing out at people and things, he is wholly unprepared for your breakdown.

To him, it started like any other argument you two had. Your voices grew louder, your brows knit together in glares, and baseless claims, threats, and swearing spilled from each of your mouths recklessly. Kyrie was fussing in the background, trying her best to calm the situation with her words.

But then you started to hit things. You punch a wall, breaking through the drywall and knocking things off it. You kicked at tables and shelves, rattling the things on them into falling over or to the floor.

“The hell is your problem?!” He more so accused than asked.

He doesn’t approach you though, yelling back at you from a distance as he felt his right arm flex as the adrenalin in his body was making his arm crave violence, but he wasn’t going to lay a hand on you.

That was his intention, but then you started throwing things. In your blind rage you were just flinging things around randomly, but then you threw a cup in Nero’s direction.

He easily doges with a lean and it sores past him. It shatters against the wall… right beside Kyrie.

She lets out a surprised shriek, jumping back as the broken shards graze her dress though do not cause any damage.

Nero snaps, his protective brother instincts kicking in as he storms over to you.

“Nero, wait.” Kyrie pleads, reaching for his arm but he brushes it away.

“Stay back Kyrie, I’ve got this.” Truthfully, he wasn’t sure what he was going to do but he had to stop you.

“Please don’t hurt them.” Kyrie cries though she heeds Nero’s demand and backs out of the room, knowing that she would just be in the way.

Of course Nero wasn’t going to hurt you. He could never. And that’s the problem. He doesn’t know how to stop someone’s violence without resorting to it himself.

As he watches you scream and throw things, which he makes sure to catch and drop on the floor, while also crying and shaking he is reminded of an angry and frightened child lashing out. You remind Nero of his childhood self.

As a child… what did people do to stop him?

A distant memory of himself and Credo flashes in Nero’s mind.

Now within arms reach you take a wild swing at him. Nero uses your momentum against you, spinning around you and pushing you forward while tripping you so you fall to the wood floor.

You hear the stomp of boots on either side of you. As you prepare to lift up onto your hands and knees, a massive weight lands on your lower back, forcing you back down.

Nero was sitting on you, pinning you to the ground.

Though not totally understanding what had you acting like this, Nero could tell that you weren’t in your right mind and you weren’t able to communicate coherently until you calmed down. So he kept you under control until you two were able to work things out together.

Though he is unable to use his legs, as they were straddling your hips, his hands are free. He doesn’t want to use them though, worrying about hurting you with his overpowered right arm. However, he will stop you from hurting yourself by tossing any sharp object out of your reach and holding your head steady if you start slamming it against the floor.

He also responds to a lot of your accusations once realizing that many of them were, whether directly or indirectly, self-deprecating.

“Broken? What the hell are you talking about?”

“You’re not a failure.”

“You just need to calm down, you’re fine.”

“Of course I love you.”

Like Reboot Dante, Nero has an attitude problem and is prone to starting/egging people into fights. However, Nero has enough self-control to not hit things he knows he shouldn’t. Like, no matter how pissed off he got at Kyrie (unlikely considering she is a saint) he would NEVER lay a hand on her. I wanted to implant that feeling here.

His solution to this is childish (fun fact I got this idea from a past experience where a family member did this to child me when I was having a tantrum) but he grew up having his anger funneled into combat training for The Order of the Sword so he doesn’t really have many experiences dealing with anger any other way.

V

You leave a scratch on the side of Nico’s van by how forcefully you slammed the door open.

“So you’re gonna bust up my van now dickhead?” She screamed, trying to follow you to continue your guys’ argument but Nero wrapped her in a Nelson hold to stop her before she started a fistfight she wouldn’t win. “How about you shove a tampon in before coming back!”

As Nico thrashed, shouting stranger and stranger insults, and Nero attempted to get her to chill out, V silently slid out of the van.

He had stayed silent through the argument, observing the situation unfold but not feeling the need or right to intervene. This decision had been solidified when Nero tried to interject and had only made things worse.

His lack of action, however, did not equate to a lack of concern for your well-being.

“Are they done yet?” Griffon said wearily as he was summoned, having evaporated to safety the moment his mocking comments had gotten him grabbed by the leg and tossed into the front windshield of the van.

In his defense, according to himself, that attack wouldn’t have worked on him if his master didn’t ban him from hurting you.

“Scout ahead for demons,” V instructed while calling Shadow out from the floor. His eyes stayed glued to your form as you stomped down a dirt path leading away from the city and into a lightly forested area. Though with it being the fall season many of the trees were close to bald of any foliage. “and lead them away from any danger.” V added with a stroke to the top of Shadow’s head.

Shadow darted back into the ground and slid after you.

“Alright lover boy,” Griffon took off from V’s outstretched arm. “but I’m gonna keep high. I don’t feel like becoming Thanksgiving dinner.”

“Oh,” V called Griffon’s attention again who had already risen higher than the sparse trees. “and keep an eye out for anything… derelict.”

“Oh-ho! Now we’re talking.”

And so, you were tracked and led through the woods. Griffon zoomed around overhead, signaling to Shadow whenever your path would lead to a pack of demons while looking for an abandoned structure you could ‘play’ with. Shadow didn’t so much push you into any direction, but more so shepherd you through acts like blocking your current path and making attention-grabbing sounds and/or movements along safer roads. And V studied you from a distance, keeping you in earshot while casually avoiding your line of sight.

Though he was following you out of a desire to watch over you while allowing you the space to vent your frustrations, he also found a sort of fascination in your outrage.

The lover of art in him was attracted to pure, intense, unfiltered emotions. As if he was watching an interpretive dance or a slam poetry performance, V studied your movements, your posture, the words you spoke and how you said them, trying to decipher them to understand the underlying feelings from which they originated from.

By the time you finished tearing apart the remains of what was once a cabin, he had a firm grasp on what had truly set your heart ablaze.

He doesn’t approach you until you slump to the floor in exhaustion. Your head lolls back as your tired muscles surrender to your weight. You start to fall back but are quickly caught by V’s arm sliding around your shoulders and supporting your neck.

He flouts down to one knee as he lowers you onto the awaiting Shadow, the feline’s warmth and silky coat cradling around you as your new support in this almost laying position.

As your body and consciousness fight over whether or not to sleep here and now, you feel a soothing warmth glide up your cheek.

“Rest now love.” V’s fingers glide up the side of your face and into your hair. He could discuss his theories on what feelings deep in your heart had caused you this pain after you had recovered your strength, even if that meant sleeping under the fall sunset somewhere deep in the woods. “I’ll be here to watch over you.”

This was the last one I wrote since I am still getting a grasp on V’s, and his familiar’s, mannerisms. I think I did okay. This one ended up the longest and I blame this on integrating Griffon and Shadow, which I also think I did okay writing.

Also, I debated whether to have Griffon present as you fell asleep, maybe cuddling up on you for warmth, but I feel like he would talk your ear off and not let you rest so I left him out.

[monkey-papermoon]

Goblin HRT day 1

Knock!

kNOCk!!

knocK!!!

Dr Erian looked up from the piles of documents on his desk, confused at the unnecessary noise "Um... Come in?" The door slammed open "Ma'am you can't jus-" <lemme through!> "It's alright, Nurse, let her in" Dr Erian mustered, pushing his glasses upwards. The nurse sighed and shrugged before leaving a short disheveled girl in her place. The girl stomped forth excitedly "Ah. you must be Maxin-" <Monkey.> "Right to it, eh? Well, monkey would be a very easy transition process. Afterall, Humans are Prim-" <No, my name, Monkey!> Dr Erian cleared his thoat "Okay... Well, Monkey, how can I help you today?" Monkey sat in the chair awkwardly and grinned as she steepled her fingers on the doctors desk <Goblin. No matter how hard, Goblin.> Dr erian pulled off his glasses and rubbed them with his coat "this is getting out of hand... Okay. But I must warn you, races from a more fictional realm make for a significantly harder transition. You must also realize there are many risks, including but not limited to - Lowering of intelligence, worse attention span, inability to blahblahblahblahblahblahblah." Monkey stared off into space, drool falling from her mouth slightly.

"Did you catch that? I - Miss Monkey?" Dr. Erian softly laughed in disbelief "Nevermind... I see you'll fit right in. Sign here! Wait - did you live as your perferred species for at least 2 y-" He trailed off, returning his sight to Monkey, who was still distracted "Nevermind, a silly question." He snapped his fingers at Monkey and she snapped back to attention "Sign here, Miss" <Oh! that easy... Really!? I'm so happy! You're a life saver Doc!> She squeeled and flapped her hands. Dr. Erian returned the glasses to his face and mouthed 'wow' before responding "Don't mention it. But we're gonna have to take bloodwork before we can prescribe these medications as to prevent complications." <Hey, I said no matter how hard, didn't I? Go for it.>

Monkey entered her home and rubbed her sore arm before quickly kicking off her boots and replacing her clothes with an oversized hoodie, her height always felt wrong, anything that made her feel shorter helped.

She let out an exhausted sigh and layed down amidst her pile of stuffed animals, she greeted every one of them and rolled to stare at the cieling. Pausing for a time before her lip started trembling <babies~ i'm... it happened. I'm... i'm gonna be me!!> She screamed ecstatically, tears flooding her eyes before she pulled a pillow over her face and squeeled into it.

This won't be easy, she knew it, and this would be a long road with difficult changes. But even still. It felt like a massive weight has been pulled from her shoulders. Like she has been running towards something unreachable for years and can finally rest.

She is to pick up her new prescriptions the day after, and she couldn't contain her excitement. With her friends all by her side, she sobbed into the night.

[Thanks for reading! I genuinely hope you enjoyed. This is part one of Goblin HRT, a concept that means a lot to me since realizing my identity. In it's essence it is a lot more comedic in tone but there will be parts that get a bit graphic or gloomy.

Bonus info! This story if it wasn't clear focuses on Monkey, a stand in for me, but I excel at Third person pov. The pov switches between Erian and Monkey to get the full picture, though i'm used to writing limited 3rd person. The arrows '<>' are a callsign Monkey uses online that are meant to look like the outwards facing ears that Goblins are usually depicted with, it became such a main stay that when she thinks or speaks in sentences she imagines the arrows around them.

Also I will likely reupload in the future with art attached and when I make another part but I wanted to get this out sooner rather than later.

If you're willing i'd appreciate if you would repost! , Follow for more, it helps me spread reach! ]

[newx-menfan]

NYX # 1 Review

*Spoilers!*

After weeks of waiting, spoilers, comic leaks , and “The Krakoan’s” identity being very brutally obvious…it’s FINALLY HERE guys! The CLOSEST we will probably EVER get the a NXM book!! JK!!😆

The issue starts with Kamala monologuing about her recent acceptance to an after school program in NY to Bruno, who is currently in Amsterdam. (I’ll fully forewarn everyone and be transparent that I only read Kamala when G Willow Wilson was writing the book 😬…so Kamala fans MAY need to help me out a bit, lol) 

Kamala literally runs into Sophie and they go to Prodigy’s lecture…(no offense to Prodigy…but Sofia’s a bit right…the lecture COULD use a little more finessing, lol…)

Sophie gives him shit and Kamala realizes she’s friends with the “cool kids” now, who pointedly go out of their way to embarrass and humiliate their teachers (not that Bruno or Miles isn’t cool, Kamala…)

It’s interesting that in some ways DAVID is going the academic, “through proper channels” route…but it also makes sense considering some of his characterization during NXM: AX…(and why a certain character is the PERFECT FOIL for him, in this storyline!…)

David- who, while calling out characters like Josh…was also a bit of a “rule follower” in a way that certain OTHER characters DEFINITELY weren’t…

Any, Sophie convinces Kamala to go clubbing with her and they run into Anole bartending. Anole gets accosted by some patrons screaming about a mutant “terrorist”. (Also…I really LOVE Sophie swearing all the time 😂🤣…I guess her polite way of sassing has changed after “Riot at Xavier’s” and being dead lol)

Kamala and Sophie get kicked out of the club while defending Anole (I guess they’re not having a “brat” summer….☹️). Kamala then dons her Ms Marvel suit and calls David…sorry… Professor Alleyne… to help unlock a phone (the interaction IS super adorable!) and we learn that the guys at the club are committing crimes and pinning it on mutants. (Or so it would SEEM! Foreshadowing!!)

While on the phone, Laura attacks and brakes Kamala’s phone, because Laura is kind of a dick, telling her she’s chasing “ghosts”. (This is why Laura doesn’t have consistent friends guys 😒🤣)

Laura’s characterization…isn’t great… (Laura you were LITERALLY ON a teen X-Men group…you LOST the right to call anyone “kids”!)

Kamala then tells Laura she needs to get a life (which is kind of TRUE…). 

FINALLY…after all the filler…we get to the STAR!…who people have been desperately WAITING FOR…

KRAKELLION! (Sorry @ thestomping-ground …but I’m stealing the name because “the Krakoan” sounds terrible lol)

In one of the COOLEST, MOST AWESOME panels ever (I am really NOT biased)…Krakellion ARISES…ready to enact revenge on the FLATSCANS!!

In HANDS DOWN, ONE OF THE BEST SCENERY CHEWING MONOLOGUES EVER WRITTEN (told you, I’m not biased!), Hellion more or less just calls into question Kamala’s movie to comic book mandated retcon… (Feel like he should have leaned more into the “Emma/Ms Marvel call out of 2006”…but I am not judging, Hellion…)

Kamala then saves the helpless flatscans on the subway- but is then forced to reckon with the fact that humans will ONLY support her because they don’t know she’s a mutant. The minute she’s outed- that hero worship will ultimately go away. ☹️

Kamala then meets up with Sophie and they talk and have coffee (Wait a minute… Kamala is an inhuman too? I thought that couldn’t happen and that’s why Quicksilver had such an identity crisis while married to Crystal??…I told you guys I’m kind of out of the loop on Schrödinger's newest mutant/inhuman…🐈‍⬛😬😂🤣); Kamala also having a mutant friend is adorable…

We transition to the Krakellion walking in some shadowy penthouse, giving Empath shit on the telecom (Brownoses shouldn’t throw stones, Empath! Also Hellion did LOTS of COOL stuff in NXM, OkAy Empath?!) and we see the new….Hellfire Club?…Hellions?…Council??…. Hopefully that gets cleared up in the next issue….

(Also…I bet you 100 bucks Empath FORCED Hellion to drop the name “Hellion” because he couldn’t stand being “Hellion and the Hellions” to Julian lol- Not Julian’s fault he picked the superior name! 😂🤣🤣)

(Also- can anyone tell me what the QR code is- it won’t scan on Kindle and I am waiting on my paper copies ☹️)

Review:

Obviously… I am biased; but this has been one of the few X-books I have been excited about in a while! 

I know people LOVED “Krakoa era” X-Men… but I am personally happy to see return to a more “Astonishing/Mutant Town/Morrison X-Men” type of story.

I am also happy to see a return to a more “Tom Taylor/Tamaki” street level Laura; as much as I whined about Taylor’s representation in the past… Laura really does work better when she’s more low key…

After years of sitting through “Wolverine and the X-Men” style books…it’s nice to see characters like Prodigy or Hellion being treated AS ADULTS and with narrative care.

The writing is fine; there are moments where I think it could be tighter, but I do think it definitely has its moments and will definitely get better as the writing team goes on and gets more used to the characters voices.

I KNOW people are going to complain that this seems more like a stealth Kamala solo…and while I DO think there’s some validity to that argument (it’s focus is DEFINITELY on Kamala and getting stubborn “Inhuman fans” like me to accept her as a mutant….); I am mostly fine with it, since that seems to be what it takes for fans to get a “New X-Men: Academy X” book.

The biggest complaint I have is unsurprisingly Laura- we’re still sadly in the “Talon-esque”/ “Laura written as Wolverine” representation. Hopefully this gets better the more they feature her…but I do fear this era

will be very disappointing for Laura fans (I haven’t heard much about the Gabby/Laura mini either!)….

Question/Theories:

More and more I am thinking Laura and Julian are in cahoots- possibly Laura didn’t want Kamala involved because of her emotional connection with Julian…. It may just be that she wants to try and reform him; to give him the same chance he gave her…but I think more than likely she’s using Julian to spy on Empath. (Also because I can’t envision Manuel and Julian standing each other for more than five minutes lol)

Is Tag helping Hellion? I feel like Tag SHOULD be helping him, since they’re bros and Tag literally got blown up in a school bus… (Also his powers are cool…)

The BIGGEST question is- Is Hellion blasting “brat” through AirPods under that helmet? Is he having a “brat summer”? Is “Mean Girls” his favorite song? …(someone needs to make a “Hellion/brat YouTube fan vid” like they used to in the 2000’s 😂🤣… @romulanslutempire …?)

[autisticlancemcclain]

Okay so I haven’t read lance angst in forever and decided to read some and I have just binge read all of the Beauty and the Beast klance au you just made and I absolutely ADORE it!!! It is so amazing and I love it so much!

It did make me curious what the whole ‘rescue’ scene is going to be, is the three people in the family who didn’t want Lance to marry the prince try to save him? Or is it going to go the totally different direction?

Cause I can imagine a scene where the village sees that Lance and Keith are actually going to work out and the family gets worried that Lance is going to try to get revenge on them/the whole village so they try to take Lance away from Keith. Or try to make it so Lance wouldn’t become King when they actually get married!

But anyways yeah I love this story, and how you’ve changed it up a bit so it’s different that the original Beauty and the Beast! Thanks for listening to my rant!

anon i am kissing you for asking. you are the love of my life and the wedding is this spring.

HERE WE GO:

important to remember: lance’s family, although not conventionally, care for him deeply. he struggles to conform to what the town expects and they are scared for him, so they struggle to make space for him in a way that makes him feel loved and included. he can’t keep up with his fathers or brothers on the farm, he gets along with animals better than people (and as such refuses to hunt them, despite his stellar aim), he has no friends because he is an Odd Person, he gets obsessive over small things, he cries all the time, he’s headstrong, he argues with everyone, he’s a klutz, just…so many things. he has skills and they know that but his skills aren’t helpful in the context of the farm. he is, however, helpful in that he can send back money from marrying the prince, and if he’s married to the prince, his family knows he’s safe and cared for in a way they maybe can’t provide for him.

with this in mind it’s obvious that there’s a lot of tension and complication between lance and his family, but lance KNOWS that they love him. take the first chapter with lance and marco, for example. it looks bad and it is bad, and lance is hurt, and marco refuses to help lance do what he desperately wants — go home. but marco isn’t doing it without guilt, and he’s also doing his best to make lance’s transition easier: “You’ve always wanted to live in a castle, right?”. despite the fact that his home life isn’t perfect, lance is in that castle missing his family. he wants his sisters and nieces and nephews and brothers. he wants his mom. they may not understand him but they love him and he knows that, and in that castle with, and i can’t say this enough, NO OTHER PEOPLE, he is going to miss shit like getting hugged, for fucks sake. lance is a touchy person and as close as he and hunk are doing to become hunk is a Literal Block Of Wood, and keith is going to be too closed off to provide any tactile affection for a While.

my plan is that after a few chapters of slowburn and building friendships, lance is going to get all morose and miserable. and keith, who is well beyond whipped at that point, is going to want to help. so one day lance is going to muster the courage to ask to have his family for a visit (“They’ll stay outside! I swear! They’ll have no chance of even seeing you, Keith, please, I missed bothering my brothers so much —”) and keith won’t even come close to denying him.

and because chekhov’s gun is the only thing i’ve got locked and loaded, obviously one of lances family members (probably one of the kids) is going to go wandering inside. and lance is going to try to stop it but it will be Too Late. they’re going to see keith and freak out, and since keith’s freak outs are very scary, it’s going to make the whole situation worse, and they’re going to drag lance back home kicking and screaming and when they come back with with the town and pitchforks.

the gaston of the story is going to be james, i think, and i’m gonna change the story a bit bc i’m gonna spend longer with lance back in town and he’s sullen and furious and desperate to convince everyone that keith is kind and soft and loving, really, and they have him all wrong. which of course does not help his case. but you all know how the rest of the story goes

but yeah!!!! i’m really very excited i love this story too, and changing it was inevitable but it’s been super fun to plan how i’m gonna adapt it!! i’m rly looking forward to writing all the sappy falling in love parts teehee

[bargainoriley]

The Dark Side Of The Moon (1973)

Here are my thoughts on the alleged best album of all time, TDSOTM! Before I even begin to write my thoughts here on the songs, I want to comment on the album title! The title already makes the album very intriguing, since the dark side of the moon title here is (probably) a metaphor for the hidden dark sides of humanity we don’t always see, at least in my opinion! Since the dark side of the moon is a side of the moon we never see when looking up at the sky, but it will always be there, along with the light side we see (just like humanity)! Anyways, here are my thoughts (which turned out a lot more lyric-based than I thought, oops)!

Disclaimer: I have already listened to this album before, so these technically aren’t my first time thoughts like with other albums!

1. Speak to Me

The heartbeat intro is very intriguing, and I love how you can hear snippets of later songs on the album here (e.g., Money, Time, and TGGITS), already showcasing a theme of life here (birth of a child, especially because of the scream borrowed from TGGITS, which sounds like childbirth). 

2. Breathe in the Air

And then we get this gorgeous transition into this song! The guitar work here is particularly lovely, along with the bass and keyboards! Makes you feel like you’re floating. David’s voice here is also lovely! I love the reference here already to Eclipse in the lyrics! The lyrics already set a very interesting theme of life/a person being born and parents giving their kids independence and showing a person’s childhood. 

 3. On the Run

Love how ominous this feels! It gives me video game OST vibes! The synths here are just awesome as well! Very futuristic sounding still in 2024! As the song title says, this song is probably supposed to represent someone “on the run,"  maybe from time, considering it’s the next song? But you can’t run from time, which Time will later go into more. This person on the run here is imo definitely the same one that was born in Speak To Me/Breathe in the Air.

 4. Time 

This song…. Omg it’s so freaking good!!!!! I love the intro here, since it makes you feel like you’re out of time with all the clocks ticking and ringing (the person running from time in the previous song, of course, didn’t succeed; at least I think that is what it’s supposed to represent). And then comes the rest of the instruments along with a heartbeat!! Godddd this intro is so freaking badass and really sets the mood for how depressing/ominous this song really is (the keyboard in this intro is especially so cool). The keyboards here really make the song this good, along with the guitar! Then the guitar kicks in, and along with it the very meaningful lyrics. These lyrics about time always being there and it isn’t going to stop for you even if you’re young/the passage time/you shouldn’t waste time are so freaking good. And then Rick’s ethereal vocals hit in the interludes (I love his voice so much; also, only now with this listen, I actually know this is Rick singing here; previously, I thought it was David singing the entire song; it makes me realize how far I’ve come in terms of PF lore). Then the guitar solo starts after the lyric “You missed the starting gun!" Godddd the placement of the amazing amazing guitar solo directly after that hard hitting verse is really really good! (It shows the despair of having wasted important time imo). The background vocals in this song are also just so goood and really showcase the ethereal/omnipresent nature of time. Then the rest of the lyrics hit! With the “closer to death” and “hanging on in quiet desperation” lines being particularly heavy hitting and meaningful here!!! I just love the combination of the hard hitting instrumental and lyrics! Also love how the melody here goes back to Breathe In The Air to showcase the person being born returning to their childhood one last time (forgot to mention that this is still the same person from the previous songs here)! One of my absolute favorite Floyd songs and one of my favorites on this album! Along with the next song!

 5. The Great Gig in the Sky 

Goddd the transition here is already amazing. And then you get the absolutely divine piano playing by Rick here, making you feel like you’re floating again! And then the beat drops with the absolutely incredible vocal solo by Clare Torry! This song is just so freaking powerful and good sounding it’s amazing!!! The melody here is divine as well! I also love how melancholy this song is and how the vocal solo is technically just a guitar solo being sung instead of played on a guitar! This song, in my opinion, represents the afterlife/death, especially because of the quick monologue here of “not being afraid to die” (and also the fact that it follows up Time, which is about trying to cheat time and being afraid to grow old). The way Torry sings the vocal solo also kind of sounds as if she is dying and giving it her last all (screaming in frustration and in fear of dying—the person from the previous songs desperately doesn’t want to die). Additionally, the end of the song is about accepting death imo since Torry stops singing as powerfully as she did before eventually stopping and thus showing that the person who’s dying has accepted their fate (this is probably still the same person from the previous songs, this time dying). TGGITS is probably my favorite song off this album ngl (and one of my all time favorite Floyd songs).

 6. Money

And here is another one of my favorite Floyd songs ever! The bass/guitar riff here is so iconic and good (fun fact: I learned how to play the bass line to this song!) along with the cash register noises. The groovy vibes here are just so good, and the 7/4 time here makes the song really unique and cool! And the lyrics about how money/capitalism/greed corrupts people here, of course, are amazing as well, though it doesn’t connect with the end of the last song well… Maybe this is a flashback to when the person was alive and succumbing to greed?? (After all it’s been said that your life flashes before your eyes when you die). The guitar and sax solo here, of course, are just sooooo good and groovy as well (especially the guitar solo, omgggg, I was blown away when I first listened to this song)!! The melody here is amazing as well, and I just love how intense this song is! Not to mention, when the solos hit, I was head banging hard! David’s voice here is also so good and soulful! Along with his guitar playing, of course, as well (love the wah wah effects). Also, Nick's drums here are a highlight!! He has such good drum fills here!! The outro here is also so cool (David’s “aways”/vocal scatting is just sooo good, always makes me sing along, in fact, this whole song always makes me sing along).

 7. Us and Them

And then we get this gorgeous keyboard transition!! It's been a long time since I listened to the second half of songs on this album, so let’s see how this turns out! I love the guitar and drums here already—very ominous but pretty sounding! And then we get a soulful sax! I’m also just noticing how well the band plays here on this album as a unit! Then an absolutely beautiful and intense beat drop hits and it’s so good!!!! And I also really like the lyrics here about the negative/dark side of the military and the horrors of war, and the guitar playing here is sooo good as well (sorry for repeating myself so much, I have nothing else to say but that the guitar playing on this album is simply incredible). And then we get a lovely little piano solo from Rick (my comment from my obscured by clouds review still stands: I love his piano solos!) And then there is a lovely sax solo as well! I adore how intense this song is and how full it sounds (even though it makes it very hard to hear what lyrics are being sung in the beat drops—at least imo since I’m not a native speaker and didn’t have the lyrics available to read at hand because I listened to this album on a flight, so I had to listen very carefully for what lyrics were sung on this album)! I also love the echoe effect on David’s voice here! As if people were imitating what he is saying (just like the lyrics are writing about in terms of conformity -> “which is which and who is who”). Surprisingly one of my favorites as well (haven’t heard this song in a while and was surprised at how good it is)!

 8. Any Colour You Like

And then there’s this absolutely incredible instrumental!! I love love love love the synths and guitar here!!! I especially love the synth solo here! It’s very ahead of its time! The guitar effect here is just so cool sounding as well. The fact that this is after Us and Them could maybe show how a soldier is pushing away his issues/negative feelings about the military/war with drugs (especially since this definitely sounds like a drug trip, imo). The bass here is also just sooo good! I’ll repeat it here: the band is playing really well together in this album!! This song also just sounds so otherworldly and divine as well! One of my favorites off this album as well!

 9. Brain Damage 

Love how ominous this already sounds!! I really like Roger’s voice here (and also his harmonies with David omgggg) and the lyrics about mental illness are also powerful (especially in the choruses). I think this song is definitely based on Syd imo (especially since this song’s lyrics about mental illness kind of resemble Syd’s experiences with Pink Floyd imo and also the fact that this song is placed after the drug trip song (definitely a very deliberate choice)). The lyric “the band plays different tunes” also adds to my assumption since this is exactly what happened after Syd got kicked out, and it also resembles lyrics from Jugband Blues here about being replaced. Additionally, the “lunatic is in my head” line could refer to the fact that the way Pink Floyd treated Syd still haunts Roger and the rest of the band (which is something that will come up more in the next album). The melody is also so good, as is the synth at the end. 

 10. Eclipse

And here comes the climax of the album, shown with an incredible transition!! This song is so good and really shows off everybody’s best playing here! The vocal harmonies are also so good and really hammer home that we are not alone in this world: everyone experiences bad things in life/the experiences mentioned here in this album! Also, the lyrics here are such a powerful and meaningful ending to this album! And then the heartbeat starts again, showing the endless cycle of life (and maybe even reincarnation, imo) and that the experiences in this album are bound to happen again and again until humanity no longer exists. As I said, very very powerful!

 

In general, this album is just as good as I remembered it to be! The instrumentation is absolutely incredible, along with the lyrics; they’re both equally good here!! I also love the implementation of the darker experiences of life theme here, and it was also really well done and executed! Every song here is simply incredible: there is no filler, in my opinion, and every song serves its purpose! Not to mention the transitions here are immaculate, and the whole album feels like one very good, very unique experience! As much as I love this album, though, I have to say Meddle is still my favorite (even if it has one filler song), because it just sounds more raw and improvised, and I really like its sound more than TDSOTM’s sound (it’s very polished sounding, I like my music sounding a bit more raw). But TDSOTM is definitely my second favorite album so far (and it’s also a close one at that). Next up is another album I’ve already listened to (a while ago, probably 2 years ago for the first time just like with TDSOTM) but never wrote my thoughts on: Wish You Were Here! Excited about that album as well, since I remembered it to be very good!

[peachymilkandcream]

Written In Blood|Part 13|Modern Yandere Levi x Evelyn

WARNINGS: noncon/dubcon, graphic descriptions of violence, domestic violence, manipulation, mind breaking, yandere behaviour/themes, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, wishing rape upon someone, misogyny, mentions of child abuse, blackmail, revenge porn, murder, etc.

===============================================

Levi stumbled back as she brought the book down on his head, trying to catch himself on the bedside table and falling.

Evelyn was more adept than he thought, she kicked him in the stomach while he was down and ran out the door.

She furiously ran through the apartment, trying to find the way through the maze to the door. She was disoriented, this whole time she had invited him into her home so he could learn the ins and outs while she had never once step foot in his own apartment.

All of his doors were closed so she couldn't easily see in and move on. She heard footsteps behind her, coming fast and strong, she had to wait until he passed.

Evelyn ran into a room and shut the door as quietly as she could, it was dark inside, but a steady drip into what seemed like porcelain indicated she was probably in a bathroom. Meaning there could be bigger and heavier objects to attack with, like the top of the toilet. She could do this, she could escape, she had written and researched so much about murder and kidnapping that she was confident she would be the one who wouldn't become a victim.

Footsteps came closer and stopped in front of the door. Evelyn held her breath, hoping he didn't hear the panicked gulps of air she was taking in. Hopefully he would just move on and she could slip out behind him and go a different way.

"I know you're there. I'll give you five seconds to come out willingly, or else I'll have to teach you a lesson."

Her heart pounded in her ears as he spoke through the door. Not wanting to reveal herself in case it was a bluff, and he was going to go to every door and say that hoping she'd take the bait.

After the allotted five seconds passed he spoke again. "Have it your way."

Suddenly she heard the door lock, sealing her inside. She went to the door and tried it but there was no way someone dehydrated and weak like her could open it by force. What little strength she had left and adrenaline had forced her through his hallways, but now that she had stopped it was drastically leaving her.

"You had better be more willing when you come out."

The light suddenly flipped on, making her squint and blink while she still tried the door, his footsteps fading as he walked away.

As soon as Evelyn turned her eyes took in the dripping sound.

And then she screamed.

===============================================

Levi smirked as he heard the blood-curdling scream. It seems his little project had found Stephanie, the hooker who he had brought into his apartment a few days ago as a celebration for the transition into his new life. He had gotten a tad lazy and forgot to dispose of her, but now the psychological torture of spending hours alone with a corpse would bring Evelyn around.

While he heard her cry Levi sat down at his computer with a light snack while scrolling through the fuel he had added to the scandal fire.

He had completely changed the narrative from Evelyn being a cheater, manipulator, horrible friend, to a victim of slander.

Some even hoped that Levi and her would get together and start dating after surviving the trauma of being so attacked.

His smirk grew wider, it was all falling into place. Now even his relationship pursuits had public backing, as if that were his sign that it was meant to be.

Levi couldn't help himself, he laughed and laughed, not believing his luck. Especially when he saw Petra's name flash on his phone when she sent him a text.

"Oh...what now-"

When he read her message, his smirk just grew wider.

[poseidonsdaughterthesiren]

The Daughter of Poseidon: Chapter Ten

                                                     🌊🌊🌊

The sun drooped in swirls of pinks, oranges, and purples. The birds and the frogs sang their transitional duet. A gentle breeze settled across the waves of the lake.

Della sighed and pushed her soft curls behind her ear. She sat at the edge of the dock kicking her feet back and forth in the water. Back and forth. Splish. Splash. Backwards than forwards. Splish. Splash.

She stared blankly at the images the clouds created. A few of them resembled horses and pegasi. Other appeared like silhouettes of people fighting–Della tried to ignore those. One, if she squinted, almost looked like Perry the Platypus–huh interesting choice there Zeus.

“Del?”

Della stiffened at the sound of his voice. She turned her head and there he was in his orange camp shirt.

“Luke?” she breathed out. Her lips curved up into a soft smile.

He grinned back at her and took a seat by her on the dock.

Della turned to him. He looked like he had when they first met.

“You changed your hair,” he said. He reached a hand out and played with one of the many little braids in her hair.

Della laughed and and grabbed Luke’s hand in her hair. She held there for a moment not quite sure what to do next. Her eyes met his brown ones.

They were soft and full of love. Love he never got to show her–not really.

He cupped her cheek in his hand.

They were so close their noses were touching.

“Gods,” she whispered, “I wish you were actually here.”

“I know,” he whispered back. “But you better take the sign Aphrodidite is throwing at you?”

“What do you mean? Della gave him a puzzled look.

“Thalia’s brother.”

Della sighed and closed her eyes a tear slipped out

“Hey none of that,” he said, “I know you like him.”

Luke removed his hand from her cheek and pulled back a bit.

“But–”

“Del, we’ll meet again for real one day–but for now–be happy.”

“Okay,” she whispered.

“That’s my girl,” Luke grinned, “Now do me a favor…please wake up.”

🌊🌊🌊

Della wakes up to the feeling of chains around her body and Piper’s voice. Someone stuffed a cloth in her mouth and by the taste it might as well have been a dirty gym sock.

“Leo, help!”

But Piper’s lips were not moving, no she was close by struggling in her own bonds.

The Cyclops from earlier was imitating Piper’s voice to trap the only remaining person in their little party.

Wait–where’s Jason?

Della glances around to find the blonde konked out to Piper’s left. He has a giant welt on his left eyebrow.

Della tries to shimmy around in her restraints but to no avail. They were too tight. She let out a muffled cry as the restraints seemed to get tighter. How could she have been so stupid? Monocle Motors with a single red-eye symbol? She should’ve thought about it harder–then again she has a concussion.

“Leo?” The Cyclops says again less certain. “See told you it was nothing,” he grumbles in his normal voice.

Della grunts and struggles in her restraints again.

“Leo, help me!” it screamed.

“Help–” “Piper’s” voice cut off turning masculine again, “Bah, there’s no one out there. No demigod could be that quiet.

Della stops struggling and takes a deep breath. She closes her eyes seeing if maybe just maybe there’s some water nearby.

The other cyclops chuckles, “Probably ran away, if he knows what's good for him. Or the girl was lying about a fourth demigod. Let’s get cooking.”

Snap. A bright orange light sizzles to life. The cyclops in a chain mail loincloth waltz over to Piper, who squirmed and tried to head-butt him in the eye.

“Can I take her gag off now? I like it when they scream.”

The question is for the third cyclops, apparently their leader. They grunt in response and loincloth removes Piper’s gag.

To Della’s relief, she doesn’t scream. Piper takes a shaky breath like she’s trying to keep calm.

“Scream Girl! I like funny screaming!”

“Oh, Mr. Cyclops, you don’t want to kill us. It would be much better if you let us go,” Piper says with that rich silk voice.

Loincloth scratches his head in thought. He turns to the other cyclops Fiberglass-Toga. “She’s kind of pretty, Torque. Maybe we should let her go.”

Torque growls, “I saw her first, Sump. I’ll let her go!”

Sump and Torque square up on each other but the third cyclops rises and shouts,

“Fools!”

` Shit, she’s female…Tyson once commented that the females were usually smarter than the males. That also meant they could be taller too….

Della’s wide eyes snap over to the she-clops. Intelligence sparkles in her singular red eye. She towers above the other two and her chainmail dress scratches the cement as she moves.

She clops stalks over and pushes Sump aside. Torque backs up in response.

“This one is Venus’ spawn,” she snarls, “She’s charmspeaking you.”

“Please ma’am–”

` “Rarrr!” The lady cyclops said. She grabbed Piper around the waist. Della struggles and yells through her gag. “Don’t try that pretty talk with me girly. I’m Ma Gasket! And I’ve eaten heroes tougher than you for lunch!”

She drops Piper to let her dangle. Ma Gasket turns to Della a wicked smile coats her features.

“Now this girly will be one of my highest achievements! A daughter of Neptune! A very rare cut indeed!”

Della glares at Ma Gasket and struggles a bit more in her bonds. She is not a piece of meat–wait Neptune…oh yeah Dad’s Roman name.

Ma Gaskey laughs and turns around to chew out Sump.

Piper, who is now only lightly swinging back and forth, glances at Della. “You okay?” she mouths.

Della gag in mouth nods but winces at the action.

Damn her for getting a concussion and then making it worse by getting clubbed by a cyclops…speaking of she needs to figure out an escape plan and quick.

“–eat her last, Ma?” Sump asks.

“Idiot!” Ma Gasket booms. These “fine” gentlemen must be her sons. “I should’ve thrown you out on the streets like proper cyclops children! You might’ve actually learned some useful skills! Curse my soft heart I kept you!”

“Soft heart?” Torque mutters.

“What was that you ingrate?”

“Nothing, Ma. I said you got a soft heart. We get to work for you, feed you, file your toenails–”

“And you should be grateful!” Ma Gasket bellows. “Now, stoke the fire, Torque! And Sump, you idiot, my case of salsa is in the other warehouse. Don’t tell me you expect me to eat these demigods without salsa!”

“Yes, Ma,” Sump stutters, “ I mean no, Ma. I mean–”

“Go get it!” Ma Gasket screams. She picks up a nearby truck chassis and slams it over Sump’s head. Sump crumples to his knees. This must be a regular occurrence for Sump because he manages to push the chassis off his head. Then he staggers to his feet and runs off on his quest of salsa.

Della glances around trying to find a way out of this. There were a few ideas but then Della notices a certain curly-haired crouching behind the machines. Thank the gods.

Piper notices him as well and lets out a gasp.

“What’s the matter, girl? So fragile I broke you?” Ma Gaket asks. She turns to Della. “Let's hope you don’t taste like seafood Girly. I don’t think salsa can take care of fish. That last hero we ate–remember him Torque? Son of Mercury wasn’t he?”

“Yeah, Ma,” Torque says, “Tasty. A bit stringy, but good.”

“Said he was on medication but he tasted fine.”

“Tasted like Mutton,” Torque recalls, “Purple shirt. Talked in Latin. Yes, a bit stringy, but good.”

Della freezes and glances at Jason, who is still out like a light. “Purple Shirt?” Della asks.

“Spoke Latin?” Piper asks at the same time.

They glance uneasily at each other.

“Good eating,” Ma Gasket says. “Point is, we’re not dumb as people think. We’re not falling for those tricks and riddles, not us Northern Cyclops!”

Northern Cyclops?

“I never knew you were so big and clever!” Piper exclaims.

“Flattery won’t work either,” Ma Gasket says. Though she sounds quite pleased. “But it’s true you’ll be breakfast for the best cyclops around!”

“But aren’t cyclops good? I thought you made weapons for the gods?”

“Bah! I’m good at eating people. Good at smashing things. And good at building things yes, but not for the gods. Our cousins the Eldere cyclops, they do this yes. Thinking they’re all high and mighty, cause they’re a few thousand years older.”

Della glances at the machines below, hopefully, Leo finished whatever he was doing down there.

“Then there’s the Southern Cyclops, living on islands and tending sheep. Morons! But us Hyperborean Clan, we’re the best! Founded Monocole Motors in this factory–the best weapons, armor, chariots, fuel-efficient SUVs! And yet bah! Forced to shutdown! Laid off most of our tribe. The war was too quick. Titans lost. No good! No need for cyclops weapons!”

“Oh no,” Piper sympathsizes, “I’m sure you made amazing weapons!”

Torque grins. “Squeaky war hammer!” He picks up a large pole with an accordion-looking metal box on one end. He slams it against the floor cracking the cement but there is sound like the world’s largest rubber ducky getting stomped on.

“Terrrifying,” Della says.

“Can I see it?” Piper asks. “I’f you could just free our hands–”

Torque steps forward excitedly but Ma Gasket stops him.

“Stupid! She’s tricking you again! Enough talk! Slay the boy first before he dies on his own. I like my meat fresh.”

“Hey, wait,” Piper says, “Hey can I just–”

Della notices a wire spark where Leo was.

Unfortunately, so did the cyclops as they hurled a car at him.

Leo, somehow, rolls out of the way. He gets to his feet and Ma Gasket spots him.

“Torque, You pathetic excuse of a cyclops get him!” she yells.

Torque barrels towards him while Leo frantically guns the toggle on a makeshift remote.

Torque was fifty feet away. Then forty. Twenty.

Then a robotic arm whirs to life. A three-ton metal claw slams into Torque so hard he lands on his face. He tries to scurry up but the robotic hand grabs him by one leg and hurls him up in the air.

“AHHHHHHH!” Torque screams as he rockets through the air. THUD! The ceiling was too high up and too dark to be exactly sure what was happening.

Della guesses that he hit a support beam judging by the noise.

Yellow dust rains down instead of a body. Good one down two more to go.

Ma Gasket stares at Leo in shock. “My son…you…you….”

As if on cue Sump staggers back into the room a jar of salsa in his hand.

“Ma I got the extra spicy–”

Leo spun the remote toggle and a second robotic arm whacks Sump in the chest. The salsa explodes like a piñata onto the concrete floor. Sump falls back into a third machine. This arm slams into him he explodes into a cloud of yellow dust.

One more to go.

Della and Piper cheer Leo on. Ma Gasket, on the other hand, roars and grabs the nearest crane arm and rips it off the pedestal.

“You busted my boys! Only I get to bust my boys!”

Leo punches a button and two more arms spawn into action.

Ma Gasket catches the first one and tears it in half. The second arm smacks her in the head, but it only seems to make her even more mad. She grabs it by the clamps, rips it free, and swings it like a baseball bat. It misses Della, Piper, and Jason by a mere inch. Ma gasket lets it go spinning towards Leo.

Leo yelps and rolls to one side as it demolishes the machine next to him.

Ma Gasket stands twenty feet away from him now, next to the cooking fire. She clenches her fists and bares her teeth. She looks ridiculous in her getup the pigtails and the chainmail dress bu the look of revenge was not a look to laugh at.

Della knew that look all too well.

“Any more tricks demigod?” she snarls.

“Heck yeah I got tricks!” Leo shouts, “Come any closer and I’ll destroy you with fire!”

Della moves her hands in the bonds trying to connect with water just in case–just in case she is right and he has no control.

“Would you? Cyclops are immune to fire you moron. But you wish to play with flames let me help.”

She scoops red-hot coals from the fire into her hands and flings them at Leo. They all land around his feet.

“You missed,” he says incredicously.

Ma Gasket grins and pciks up a barrel next to the rucks and hurls it at Leo.

Coals spark and Leo closes his eyes.

Piper screams, “No!”

Della watches and waits–

A firestorm erupts around Leo, swirling twenty feet into the air. Ma Gasket screams in delight, but Leo doesn’t offer the fire any good fuel. The Kerosine burns up dying down to a small patch on the floor.

“Leo?” Piper asks.

Della smiles so she's right.

Ma Gasket gasps. “You live?” She takes an extra step forward. “What are you?”

“The Son of Hephestus,” Leo says, “And I warned you I’d destroy you with fire.”

He points a finger with a look of determination and shoots a bolt of white-hot flames at the chain suspending the engine block above Ma Gasket;s head.

The flames die. Nothing happens. Ma Gasket cackles. “An impressive try Son of Hephestus. It’s been centuries since I’ve seen a fire user. You’ll make a spicy appetizer!”

The chain snaps–the single link heated beyond it’s tolerance point–and the engine block fell, deadly and silent.

“I don’t think so,” Leo says.

Ma Gasket didn’t even have a chance to look up.

Smash! No more cyclops–just a pile of yellow dust under a five-ton engine block.

“Not immune to engines, huh?” Leo says, “Boo-yah!”

The curly haired boy crumples to his knees.

“Leo!” Piper yells, “Are you alright?”

Leo stumbles back to his feet. He’s never used that much of his power before, Della can tell, he’s pale and sweaty.

It takes him a long time to get Piper and Della out of their chains. Della scampers over to Jason, who was still unconcious.

Piper passes Della nectar.

Della manages to trickle a bit into his mouth, and he groans. Thank the gods. The welt on his head shrinks and he gets a bit more color back in his face.

“He’s goit a thick skull, he’ll be fine,” Leo says.

“Good,” Piper says. Then she looks at Leo with something that resemebles fear. “How–did you–the fire–have you always…”

Leo looks at his shoes, “Always,” he says, “I’m a freaking menace. I’m sorry I should’ve told you guys sooner–”

“Sorry?” Della and Piper laugh.

“That was amazing, Valdez! You saved our lives. What are you sorry about?” Piper asks. She smiles at him with pride in her eyes.

“You did awsome Dude,” Della smiles, “I had a feeling about this.” she gestures to the fire thing.

“I bet you did, Katara,” Leo teases. His smile fades when he notices something by Piper’s foot.

Della sees it too.

Yellow dust–the pulvarized cyclops remains, shifts across the floor like an invisible wind was pushing it back together.

What in Hades–

“They’re forming again,” Leo says, “Look.”

“Impossible…” Della mutters. She’s seen monsters die they never do this.

“I thought you said they go back to Tarturus?” Piper asks.

“They’re supposed to,” Della says.

“Well, no one told the dust that,” Leo says.

“Oh gods,” Piper says, “Boreas said something about this. When–”

“Death holding up horrors, When monsters no longer stay in Tarturus and death is no longer confined to Hades,” Della finishes for her. “Let’s get out of here. Now.”

“Don’t need to tell me twice,” Leo says. 

[sunshinescribes]

All I Wanted Was You

Pairing: Okoye x Attuma

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Alt!Attuma & Alt!Okoye, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Second Chance Romance, Makeup Sex

Summary: Attuma never let anything go easily. Never did anything too small. Except Okoye. Beautiful, incomparable Okoye. Where had all that fight been when she began to slip away?

Attuma had always been a fighter.

His mother often told him so, recounting how he had come into the world kicking and screaming, so full of life despite the uncertainties of her doctors.

She had whispered his name as he cried in her arms.

Attuma. Mighty one. Warrior spirit.

And how right she had been as he slowly grew from a temperamental baby to a young boy fierce enough to chase away the older kids. From a boy to a man who had been graced with imposing height and a thick build that made his family joke about his legitimacy.

His transition to adulthood had been surprising, especially to his mother who fondly remembered how Attuma once fit in the palms of her hands. He had grown, but his nature remained the same.

Attuma never let anything go easily. Never did anything too small.

Except Okoye.

Beautiful, incomparable Okoye.

The love of his life.

Where had all that fight been when she began to slip away? When the space between them grew until it was impossible to cross—until it felt like they were miles apart, and words couldn’t mend what had been lost?

It had happened slowly like all painful things do.

The arguments came first, petty little debates that somehow managed to go beyond what either of them had expected. Okoye would switch to Xhosa halfway through, and Attuma would stomp away muttering in his native tongue. They’d find each other later, murmuring their apologies while at the height of their ecstasy—Okoye rendering Attuma speechless with her mouth, Attuma turning her into a quivering mess with his thick fingers.

Distractions.

A way to wash away the tension without facing the actual issue. Little moments of peace disguised as salvation.

Next came Okoye shutting herself off, slowly pulling away. She became too busy with work. Too busy to be around. Too busy for their trip to the Yucatán Peninsula. Attuma had seen it for what it was, saw the cracks long before everything shattered, but he held onto the hope that if he gave her the space she seemed to seek so desperately, all would be well in the end. If it was what Okoye wanted, he would give it to her. He would have given her anything.

She needed you. She needed you, and you weren’t there for her. Not really.

Attuma could see the fault of his inaction now. Months later, miles away from her. He laid awake thinking of Okoye. Thinking about her cold exterior that hid a sweet, soft soul. Her love was not given freely, and what a gift it was when it was earned.

Attuma could hear her laugh echoing in the corners of his cousin’s apartment. Could feel her fingers running through his long hair as he laid in bed, felt her nails scrap his scalp in a way that always put him at ease. He hummed her favorite song to himself throughout the day, the soft lullaby she had grown up with.

Attuma had tried to push the memories away, tried to rid himself of anything that smelled of her, but it was nearly impossible to get her shea butter and gardenia scent out of his clothes. He tried dating again…that had been a bust.

His silent nature was a turn-off for some, his clear disinterest discouraging for others—and he found that it didn’t matter.

They weren’t her.

Nobody would ever be what Okoye was to him.

His equal.

The love of his fucking life.

The revelation was enough to make him a little hopeful—reckless even, as he made his way to the home they once shared.

Attuma wanted Okoye back. Wanted the life they had once shared before it all went wrong, but he could settle on her knowing that he still loved her—that he could never stop loving her…and an apology. One he had swallowed for months. The same apology he had debated texting to her in the middle of the night when everything came crashing back to him, like a wave hitting the shore.

It was late when he left his cousin’s apartment in the pouring rain. Attuma had hardly noticed, and it did little to deter him as he drove through the night until the roads became familiar, and the sight of a house that held everything good in his life came into view.

Attuma was a born fighter—he would fight for Okoye. Fight for her love. Fight for a life that only made sense with her in it.

Raindrops trickled down his face, soaked his dark hair as he approached the front door. His knuckles seemed to tap against the glass door of their own will. The sound of rain hitting the roof and splashing against the pavement did little to ease the rapid beat of his heart.

He knocked again and his heart caught as he heard Okoye call out.

“I’m coming! One sec—”

Okoye stopped as she pulled the door open, her eyes going wide as she stared up at Attuma. She blinked, as if her eyes were playing tricks on her.

She was beautiful—more beautiful than Attuma had even remembered, and he wondered how that was possible. Her rich, darkskin was radiant under the soft glow of the porch light. Her head was still clean shaven, displaying the traditional tattoos that Attuma had found so fascinating the first time he saw her. His eyes lowered. Okoye wore a simple dress shirt and a pair of shorts that exposed her long, thick legs.

Itzamna, how had he allowed himself to ever be away from her?

“Okoye.”

Attuma’s voice was a low, comforting rasp that ripped her from her own surprise—but it also brought back memories she had been desperately trying to forget.

She leaned back, crossing her arms over her chest as she stared up at him with a guarded look.

“Attuma.” She glanced at the raindrop dripping down his jaw. “What do you want?”

You.

Attuma held his tongue—he could get to that in time, but for now he needed to speak the words she should have heard from him months ago.

“I’m sorry Okoye.” Attuma could see the flash of surprise in her eyes, the subtle lift of her brows. “For not fighting for us. For turning away when you needed me the most.”

Her arms fell at her side, and Okoye was silent as she considered him. Her eyes searched his, as if attempting to discover any evidence of dishonesty in him.

“You’re soaking.”

She turned back into the house, leaving the door open as she discarded her slippers and walked out of view. Attuma was hesitant, slowly pushing through the threshold, and instinctively dipping his head before it hit the top of the door frame.

The house looked different, more barren than he remembered it, but then he supposed Okoye had done the same thing he had—tried to rid herself of any evidence of a life they once shared.

She sat on the black couch in the living room, her legs pulled close as she cast him a curious look as she held out a towel for him.

Attuma took it with little urgency, drinking in the image of her before him. The memory of her head against his chest flashed in his mind, the book she’d been reading forgotten on the floor as Okoye slept silently against him, warm and soft and completely his.

“You stood in the rain to tell me you’re sorry?” She arched a brow at him, “a text wouldn’t suffice?”

Attuma huffed lightly. He never did anything too small.

“I needed to see you.” He draped the towel over his shoulder, ignoring how uncomfortable his wet clothes felt sticking to his skin. “Needed to tell you I love you. I never stopped loving you.”

Okoye stilled; her breath caught as Attuma stared at her with so much sincerity it made her heart ache.

She averted her eyes, slowly lifting from the couch.

“You’re still wet. I might have some of your old clothes in th—”

Attuma reached out for her hand, his thick fingers catching her wrist as he pulled her back to him. His hold was gentle, light enough that if she wanted to be free of his touch she would.

“Okoye, please tell me what went wrong between us.”

Okoye started down at Attuma, taking in the soft vulnerability in his expression, the clear concern as his dark eyes searched hers, and her heart ached. Ached to know he believed it had been his doing.

“It was me,” Okoye whispered as her eyes began to sting, “Not you Attuma. It was never you.”

His brows furrowed as he stared up at her. He rubbed comforting circles into her hand, a gentle gesture meant to put her at ease—he had always been so good at that.

Where he found words lacking, Attuma turned to gestures. Thoughtful touches, a hand on the small of her back, the brush of his knuckles against her cheek—anything to remind her that he was there. He was there and he loved her wholly.

How could she have ever thought otherwise?

“I was afraid,” Okoye confessed, “I thought…I thought you would be like W’Kabi. Like all the people I have loved, and who have discarded me.”

Okoye could feel the tears rolling down her cheeks before she could stop them, feel the barely contained sob that wished to crawl from her throat.

“You were wonderful, and I was scared. If I allowed myself to love you anymore and you decided one day to leave…It would have ruined me.” She sniffled, rubbing away her tears as quickly as they fell.

Okoye hadn’t always been a cynic, but life had certainly made her one. Heartbreak had become so familiar, so expected after W’Kabi and Ramonda. Both people she loved fiercely—one as a lover, the other as a daughter loves her mother. Both had tossed her heart back at her, tattered and bruised.

She refused to add Attuma to her list.

She had done what felt necessary.

She had been a fool.

“In k’iino…” Attuma sighed, cupping her face softly. “My heart is yours. Always.”

Attuma leaned close, his lips brushing against her cheek, kissing away her tears.

He muttered his adoration in his native tongue, each word a declaration as he kissed a trail to her lips.

When their lips touched Attuma knew he could never go back—never be without Okoye again. Never be free of the taste of her soft, plush lips against his, or her demanding tongue running along the length of his bottom lip. He would never be able to do without the feel of her fingers threading through his hair, pulling him closer, as if he might slip away.

Okoye pulled away with a sigh as she rested her forehead against Attuma’s, “You can’t imagine how much I missed you.”

“I can. It was the same for me.”

Okoye hummed softly, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips before glancing down at the damp shirt that clung to his form.

Okoye could not stop herself from thinking of what hid under beneath. “Take this off.”

Attuma grinned, eager to do as Okoye wished.

He pulled the shirt over his head, carelessly discarding it to the side.

Okoye’s eyes dipped, cataloging his body as if she were committing it back to memory. Her eyes followed the lines of the scars across his stomach, the same ones she used to kiss gingerly before taking him in her mouth. Okoye’s fingers trailed a path from his neck to the waist band of his sweats.

 Attuma practically shivered under her touch.

“And these.”

He moved with speed he didn’t even know he possessed, pulling his sweats down his long legs and kicking them to the side as he sat beside Okoye in nothing but his draws. The stark contrast between her clothed form and his nearly naked one was enough to make him dizzy and painfully needy for her.

Attuma pulled Okoye to him by her waist, groaning softly as her thick thighs straddled him. She whispered something about his lack of patience as she slowly unbuttoned her dress shirt.

Patience had never been his strong suit.

Attuma pulled her shirt open abruptly, caring little for the buttons that popped and fell to the floor. His sole focus where her beautiful breasts that spilled out. Okoye gasped, slapping Attuma playfully on the shoulder but he only laughed.

“Impatient man.” Okoye tsked, feeling the evidence of his arousal brush against as she grinded against his lap. Attuma cursed in his native tongue as he cupped Okoye’s breasts, groping her soft flesh as she continued to grind into him.

It felt so good, but it wasn’t enough, not with how badly he wanted to feel her again—hear her chant his name as he brought her to her sweet release.

Attuma placed his hand on Okoye’s stomach, pushing her down on the couch as he crawled over her body. He dipped down, kissing her jaw as he worked to undo her bothersome shorts.

They were swiftly discarded besides his wet clothes and long forgotten as he stared down at Okoye, absolutely mesmerized.

Attuma brushed his hand across her clothed pussy, earning a soft groan from his love.

“You’re beautiful.” He slid her panties down her legs. “So beautiful.”

His lips found hers again as he brought his thick fingers to her soft pussy, teasing her has he drenched his digits with her sweet arousal.

Okoye proved her patience was just as limited as his.

She reached inside his boxers, freeing his hard dick—the sound Attuma made was sinful—delicious, causing her pussy flutter. Okoye’s mouth watered as she thought about how good it would feel to have him where she needed him most, stretching her in way that nobody had ever been able to do before or after him.

Okoye pumped him with a firm grip, grinning wickedly as Attuma continued to groan into her neck. His hips stuttering, chasing the feeling of her fingers around him.

If Okoye kept it up he would finish all over her beautiful fingers, and as appealing as the thought was, Attuma wanted to bring her to the brink of ecstasy—wanted to feel her velvety walls clench around his dick. He wanted her sweet release coating him—marking him.

“Want to show you how much I missed you.”

Attuma pulled her hand away, before lining his throbbing dick along her entrance. He slid his hard length between her lips, glazing his dick with her wetness while teasing her soft nub.

Okoye whispered her encouragement, and it was all Attuma needed to sink into her.

They both gasped, acclimating—remembering just how good the other felt, how well they fit.

“My Okoye…” Attuma sighed as he thrust into her. She was so soft, so fucking wet. The squelch of his dick thrusting in and out of her sopping cunt was obscene in the most delicious way, spurred him to pound into her harder.

Her fingernails dug into the flesh of his back as she anchored herself to him, moaning as he fucked her like he was apologizing for leaving her without this—without him.

Attuma brought his arm around Okoye, pulling her closer as his other hand found her clit, lightly teasing her sensitive nub. Her eyes fluttered shut, her mouth hung open as she chanted his name, and Attuma was lost—completely and utterly drunk on the feel of her.

“I’m never leaving you again.” He rolled his hips harder, thrusting into her as deeply as he could manage. His dick throbbed inside of her, painfully ready to explode inside of her.

“Say it again,” Okoye pleaded against his lips.

She was clenching around him, and words were beginning to get caught in his throat, but Attuma still managed for her.

“Never…leaving you.” He grinded into her sweet pussy, rubbed her clit while she quivered beneath him. “Never again.”

Attuma pinched her clit and she unraveled. Okoye cried out his name, fingers digging hard enough to leave marks as her pleasure washed through her. Attuma fucked her through it, felt mindless as her walls held him, demanding his release.

He got one final thrust in before he was spilling inside of her with shaky legs. His vision blurred, his mind lost in the haze of his euphoria as he came down from his high with a groan.

His eyes fluttered open, glancing down at Okoye with a hopeful smile. She glanced down at where they were still joined, before glancing up at him with a sultry look.

“I see you’re still ravenous as ever.” She playfully chided.

Attuma laughed a full, hearty laugh. Laughter had been rare occurrence during his time spent without Okoye, but now it felt as if he couldn’t do anything but.

“For you? Always.”

Okoye rolled her eyes, and Attuma lowered himself beside her on the couch. He brought Okoye flush against him, kissing her shoulder as he murmured his affection.

Everything had fallen back into place, and for the first time in a long-time things felt just right.

[bruinhilda]

Whining ahead, feel free to skip.

I am tired of American healthcare.

Yes, we know your parent collapsed and needed to be rushed to the ER, but they're not *that* bad, so we're not going to admit them. No, we don't know exactly why, but they're obviously out of danger now, so fuck off already. Come back in five days for their unrelated appointment. Be sure to call EMS and pay for another ambulance ride if it happens again because we kicked them out too soon.

Go here. Go there. We want you to come in tomorrow for a 15 minute test. Your appointment is at 11am, but since we're shit at scheduling, we'll actually call you in anywhere between 10:45 and 1pm. Oh, we're booked, so instead of being in the hospital that is aware of your condition and risks, we're going to refer you to some random clinic to do that all-day outpatient surgery. Yes, you are going to have to become a bitch and snarl and yell and constantly have to remind us that you don't have a car and have to arrange your parent's pickups 72-24 hours in advance, because we are absolutely incapable of wrapping our brains around that fact. No, we're not going to schedule their next procedure right now, while you've got a 3 hour wait for the ride back - we'll call you while you're running for a bus tomorrow. Oh, that procedure we scheduled carefully for you earlier? We had a cancellation, so we're going to insist you instead somehow come in before your transport service starts running for the day, and will be incredibly put out and nasty to you for pointing this impossibility out and refusing.

Followed up by people with helpful advice about how you have to be aggressive and combative to deal with healthcare, and here's an array of ridiculous hoops to jump through that might trick your provider into providing healthcare instead of screwing you over. It's all on YOU, you can't expect THEM to actually accommodate you unless you PROVE you really and truly want and deserve it.

It's been made abundantly clear that my parent has only lived this long because of my fighting. And that if I reach their age, I will be utterly screwed because I will be alone, and broke, with nobody to "advocate" for me. And people will say, "that's so sad," and be baffled that nobody stepped in and helped when help was so obviously needed. But I will ultimately be blamed, for being TOO needy and not being able to jump through all the hoops required and navigate these 27 point plans to ask for help that has a fifty-fifty chance of being refused on account of a minor technicality.

I'd march in the streets screaming and waving signs about it, but I'm exhausted, and if I don't get back to work, there will be no healthcare at all. Or food. Or shelter.

The truly scary thing is my parent and I have better healthcare than a fuckload of other people in this country. That hospital made a top ten list of best in the nation. There's a social safety net of sorts in this state. I talk to people or read posts from them, and they have nothing at all. Except maybe massive debt from the one time they needed healthcare to not die, so they're going to be punished for the rest of their (shortened) lives for daring to experience a moment of weakness.

I'm afraid I don't have a point or a message. I'm just tired and coming off a bout of massive anger that's transitioning into sadness. And I'm waiting for The Next Bad Thing to happen to further destabilize my life.

[oramn]

i am waiting for my tylenol to kick in, so here is an unpleasant experience with a coworker (who i am neutral dislike with). i traded my coworkers shift and i did a midday. I ended up working with three other people, here is the cast:

coworker 1: first gen bosnian american, she is going into her freshman year of college, she is going to play soccer there. she is muslim and her family fled bosnia during the genocide and settled where I live. she isn't too religious, but her family is

coworker 2: idk much about her, she's not very relevant to the story, but I like her, she doesn't do much at work but she's chill. she is like in her early 20's and she is married to a 50 year old that's the only interesting thing about her

coworker 3: our main antagonist. she 24 i think and is very loud and can be very obnoxious. she has been working here about as long as me (about 1 year maybe a little more a little lesss) i go back and for between liking her and not liking her. she has screamed at multiple people and has issues with controlling her emotions because of either bipolar or borderline personality disorder, not sure which.

Now lets set the scene, it's like 1pm, the tail of the lunch rush, we're in drive through, which has it's own little section unlike most paneras where it's just one production line. I'm with coworkers 1-3, i'm doing my thing, making salads when coworker 3 brings up politics and she's talking about voting.

coworker 3 is a very "tell it like it is" person but not in the blunt and honest way, but the "i don't care about other people's feelings i'm gonna say shit and not read the room" type of way. she also has said in a training thing that she thinks her biggest fault is that she's "too nice" when i know she has screamed at multiple people, giving one a panic attack (over soup).

she says she's voting for trump and starts getting very brash about it (she's maga). Now, i don't get into political conversations at work because 1.) i don't know enough to hold those conversations 2.) i'm not a very confrontational person. I do, however, interject when she says "i'm voting for trump because he's gonna make us all richer" i say "no what he's gonna do is he's gonna cut the taxes for the rich and raise the taxes on the poor"

and then she keeps going on about how she doesn't know much about politics but her dad and grandmother do so she's voting the way they're voting and also says that she doesn't think people who don't understand politics and aren't inclined to want to know more about politics should vote (which like ok girl i disagree).

at this point i'm very quiet and very uncomfortable, coworker 1 (my beloves) is also very uncomfortable and she notices that I'm uncomfortable so she tells worker 3 "hey can we not talk about politics."

coworker 3 keeps on talking, and is told 3 more times to stop talking about politics. now she ends up bringing up how she's not apart of the "woke left" right next to me: an 18 year old, gay, transgender man who transitioned as a teenager. people who repeat the rhetoric she is repeating believe that i am a little girl who was groomed by my parents into ruining my body. and she says that right. next. to. me.

now i don't know if she knows I'm trans, a lot of my coworkers don't, a lot of them just assume I'm really fucking gay, but still. she ends up stopping talking about politics later but I'm still very uncomfortable for the rest of my shift.

I gave her a hug as she was about to leave work because she was crying as she was stressed because her car was broken and it costed like a thousand to fix it and she is in a very rough spot in life right now and I hope shit gets better for her.

the end

[nako-doodles]

i need your thesis on all the songs in the album i'm being so serious rn 😭 i'll rb it once a day for months and months don't deprive me like this of things i didn't even know i needed

ioaefjerjgioajo ill try my best aiofjoerjgiojao i was so annoying to my friends over my first impressions over all the songs so im gonna try my best to summarize my thoughts on these songs

joonie said this entire album was a recollection of everything hes done in his 20s aka the transformative years of his life and you can ABSOLUTELY hear the member influences (at first i heard the sope influences bc they have the biggest body of work so their style is most distinct but upon relistens its really a love album to his younger self (you can really tell its an evolution from rm and mono) and his members. ALSO i love how he modulates and changes his style and timbre to fit the style and quirks of his featuring artist? hes so fucking cool????? oh my GOD?????? anyways heres the impressions by song:

track one: yun ft. erykah badu very hot of him to start the entire album w 'FUCK THE TRENDSETTERS' the bassline the restraint of a laidback soundscape the reverb set to max the lines 'I wanna be a human / ‘Fore I do some art / It’s a cruel world / But there’s gon’ be my part' is so fucking insane? fuck. this song lyrically is all about uncertainty and the soundscape has a lot of space for growth and white space for art to be exhibited dare i say, its like the debut group's first stage? full of promises and expectations and uncertainty, but you march ahead regardless......what a sexy first song on the track track two: still life ft. anderson paak

BRING IN THE FUNK HELLS YEA VHOPE IS VIBING SO HARD RN I JUST KNOW IT now the empty space and reverb bassline is given some direction and happiness here. still life is a form of art and thus begins rm's first piece of art here in his lil art collection and joon accepting that things will come as they are and ppl will try to reduce him down to one thing, but hes still a fully realized human moving forwards like us all

track three: all day ft. tablo

ok this bassline and instrumental SCREAMS yoongi to me. the lil kick between verses the beats w the bassline the high melody line the bridge that sick transition from verse to chorus like no wonder tablo is here. i know yoongi draws lots of inspiration from epik high so it makes sense. sonically speaking this song takes the funky sounds of the previous track and condenses it and brings a hint of melancholy just in time for our next track. speaking on less fun notes, tablo is really the only other person who survived such vicious tonguelashing and emerged more powerful and a better person and im just glad joonie has someone to look up to.

track four: forgetful ft. kim sawol oh our queen of folk here to deliver some nice kindie chill vibes thank you i need it for our coming song mwah. here we slowly start to hear the funky bright poppy merge to a chill sound this song was for tae i just know it!!! sonically theres some fun stuff going on but it feels like a cooldown piece for the rest of the album. joonie really said i can pull off ALLLLLLLL genres.

track five: closer ft. paul blanco mahalia

the rnb influences the syncopation the pop beats i bet jk is having the time of his life singing to the chorus. the guitar and the beat and the piano makes me an immediate fan. also they modulated the message beep to be in the same key??? as the song?????? AND it gives us a diving board into the electronica of the next song and then the sound expands when joonie comes in???? i love it.

track six: change pt. 2

OOF KIM NAMJOON DID SUM NASTY WORK ON THIS SONG ITS SO GOOD ok ok ok so this sudden electronica synthpop isnt jarring bc joonie did a fantastic job ordering this album BUT you know whats the fucking kicker???? the way he arranged this song. on paper this song should NOT fucking work but it does bc they used the same chord from the synths as the piano that comes in later even tho it turns to double time half way thru the song and it would be amazing at there BUT(dont quote me on this) change and change pt 2 are either in the same key or are on relative keys AND if you listen to change ft wale which starts on the piano and goes to electronica, he does the exact opposite here???? fuck and the lyrics mirror each other as well????? fuckK

track seven: lonely

this is the love song to mono the reverb on that guitar the upbeat melancholy the tokyo forever rain vibes are THERE BUTTTTT hes added more complex transitions and layering? like even in this short amount of time hes grown exponentially fuck kim namjoon ur so sexy track eight: hectic ft colde

THIS IS THE HOBI SONG OF THE ALBUM YES KING GIVE ME THAT BOUNCY BASS AND HIGH AIRY SYNTH CITYPOP VIBES YES KING i NEEDD someone to give me a just dance x seesaw x hectic remix asap it would sound SO good. also as someone who listens to a lot of colde/offonoff, this collab is SO FUCKING good bc you can hear coldes influences as well? its so good my god the sax the lil touches the production FUCK. ANNNDDDDD they switched to double time again for this outro so the next song doesnt come in too jarring??? mr kim how did you fit so many genres into this album and yet they all belong together????? im in so much fucking awe man!!!!!

track nine: wildflower ft. youjeen

ive told you pretty much everything i wanted but fuck the production on this song is just so fucking good. the details. the expert control of the soundscape. the arrangement. i cant wait to hear vocal line sing youjeen's lines. i also love that he put his title song at the end bc hes at the end of his 20s. this is him currently. hes still growing and growing roots and stretching to the sun fuck man i cant believe this song took over my most played joonie song forever rain in a week.

track ten: no 2 ft. park jiyoon

and here we are returned to the starting spot but slightly to the left, like when you've walked thru the museum exhibition and am spat out the exit right where you started, but w the new insights and experiences that the you from an hour ago didnt have. joonie is a masterful curator and this song ouroboroses us right back to listen to this album again. the tongue in cheek of ending w 'no looking back' when im ready to replay this album again like you literally inviting me to replay this album youve made it a point to end like this?????? lmfao kim namjoon who do you take me for hmmm?????

if youve made it to the end here i love you nothing makes sense anymore i only know that i love kim namjoon and that ive had this album on loop and i STILL hear new things in it i have no words for how much respect and awe and love i have for this man. and when he said 'fuck the trendsetters' he really did it. he dabbled in ALL of the most popular sounds and genres you hear in the music industry, pulled it off w aplomb, and moved on. anyways i love kim namjoon.