#grieving without a heart
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The world dulled around the edges. “They say we can’t grieve,” Sul murmured. “That without our hearts, we can’t be sad our brothers are dead.”
Sul took Reese’s limp hand, his soulless hand. “They’re wrong. Who’s gonna have my back…?”
-Stoneheart
@alana-k-asby This is one of those lines that has carried through all three versions/re-writes of the book. It is and always will be one of my favorites.
#Stoneheart#Asby and Jones#George Sullivan#bounty hunter#writing#writers#writeblr#bookblr#books#book quotes#quotes#grieving without a heart
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Happy belated Collections Day! Hoping more new fans means more people will end up going just as insane over these two as I have
Mostly off topic ramble about AAI and Badd in the tags!
#ace attorney#gregory edgeworth#tyrell badd#gregbadd#proportions are too off to ink them without redrawing it :(#I need to draw them again to do them justice#also hoping more people will give the first AAI a chance!#especially if they've already played it#case 1-4 was so interesting already knowing the twist#the culprit's actions are a lot more interesting if you don't just focus on the murder and look at all of the little details#I feel like no one talks about the way the culprit treated Badd#how they targeted him and his emotions specifically before and during the case#why they chose to do it in the first place#how they manage to write Badd as being monotone#but also conveying that he's hurt and grieving#seeing him in AAI2 breaks my heart#obviously still hardened from years on the force even back then#but earnestly expressing his joy#and getting to be silly#it hurts knowing how his story ends#I need to draw him so I can make a dedicated post about this
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I know this might not be very popular but I would've loved to see Feyre ruling over the Night Court all by herself after acowar.
It would've been such an interesting concept and gut wrenching at the same time.
bonus: imagine her being also pregnant with their son... I'm making myself cry for no fkn reason help
#just imagine her trying to keep her court running but also grieving at the same time#going into the CoN and facing their cruel nature#misogynist and racist faes that lives there calling her half breed/human filth like they did with Rhysand and not taking her seriously#because she a woman#and that's when she becomes as cruel as every other courts think of Night Court's rulers#the IC moments that would ensure#and when she's about to give birth...#do you remember the bridgerton scene in s2 and violet screaming that her husbands should be there while being in labor?#that she can't do this without him?#yeah well now I'm full on subbing#someone should write a one-shot for this#because my heart can't handle a multi chapter for it#feysand#pro feysand#pro feyre#pro feyre archeron#feyre archeron#feyre cursebreaker#high lady feyre#high lady of the night court
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Okay but hear me out…
#i need him to have another role with this hair. he needs to play a villian.#or like the lead in a romantic drama. a tortured artist who is extremely talented but has his walls up emotionally and won’t let anyone in.#but then he meets this guy. this guy who seems like the exact opposite of him. he’s sunshine. sweet. Ryan’s character is drawn to him and he#can’t help it. then there is this whirlwind passionate relationship. then….the lover dies. he had a terminal illness. cue extra angry#artist who is mad that he opened up his heart again only to lose this person. he struggles with seeing the good in the world without his#person. fast forward to later in the grieving process he finds a letter from#the person and its all sad but also romantic and leaves the character feeling hopeful. the character starts creating art again after not#creating anything in the year or two since his lover died. cue end credits#this sounds like a nicholas sparks novel dont it? LMFAOOO#eddie’s host
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i only want love triangles if it's whatever fucked up polygon junmo kicheol and euijeong have going on
#the worst of evil#ranting#idk how to articulate how juicy it is#junmo's fierce protectiveness of his wife - he trusts her but can't help his jealousy fear or frustration while trapped in the situation#euijeong hurting but putting her own life on the line worried for her husband while unpacking the memories of her first love#she can't help but sympathize with kicheol and what he's endured; haven't seen much of how she feels rn but it must be c o n f l i c t e d#(not necessarily even in a romantic way but wanting to root for a person chasing their goals who was once so important to you)#(all while grieving her mother without the support of her literal goddamn spouse by her side)#and kicheol. also grieving and trying to establish a place for himself and his crew yet drawn to junmo despite the red flags#his panic and desperation when jungmo bled out on him which must have triggered his own memories of losing taeho#junmo who has every reason to despise kicheol barely concealing his general rage but protects him like it's second nature at every turn#all while conflicted as a bystander to atrocities (and now willfully leaving another cop to die to protect himself his wife and the mission#getting mentally and physically pummeled left and right just bc his superiors demand it from him#all to please euijeong's family by using the promotions to prove himself and get rid of the stigma weighing him down#like !!!#and haven't even touched on kicheol wooing euijeong against his buddy's wishes and in such a pure heart fluttering way#accepting the risk for a second chance to bathe in the bright light she used to shine on his life#OMG AND BIBI'S ENTRANCE!! junmo realizing her interest gives him leverage and agency but struggling to use it to his advantage#it's soooo messy and i'm obsessed#that funeral arc is gonna haunt me for years#as is the tension during the pat down which def was supposed to be like a gang pride/dignity/lack of power against the jp folks thing#also testing their relationship and responsibilites as leader subordinate#but felt charged around whether kicheol would protest or junmo would accept the manhandling in totally different 👀 ways#goddamn i wrote an essay and this doesn't even scratch the surface of the meat of the show#tldr; i have many many feelings and for once the 'love triangle' isn't making me gauge out my own eyeballs#it's about power it's about raising the stakes and revealing things about the characters w/o dominating the plot
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Kusakabe, dear, you're too beautiful to be saying that kind of stuff
#jjk spoilers#All the prettiest characters were brought back from apparent death#Nobara was okay and it's true that when I read the lawyer's and Kusakabe's fights against Sukuna I thought it was being kept vague#but to pull a Nobara with all of them... idk#No one stays dead here except for the people who actually care for the kids and by that I mean 'including Yuuji'#kinda lowkey bitter about it#Don't get me wrong I like the characters and also they're super pretty but idk It makes death feel cheap? And the high stakes kinda fake?#Choso Gojo and Nanami actual only characters who died apparently#Well. Poor Itadori#And Kusukabe goes and runs his mouth that way in front of the kid. He is not entirely wrong but also he very much is#And yes he also says 'don't worry it's not for you to feel guilty over anything you're just kids' but also he did very much say that thing#about it all being Gojo's fault for not killing Itadori. In front of Itadori who feels guilty for that precisely#and in front of Megumi who asked Gojo to spare him and also went through the experience of Sukuna using his body as well#So Kusukabe's reassurance about them just being kids and not to feel guilty falls a bit empty#It does feel in character but man it truly makes one appreciate the way Gojo and Nanami dealt with the kids a lot more haha#Ui Ui seems like a dear#Anyway... this chapter felt a bit lame for the most part for me? I like the idea of the characters discussing the could have/would have#and feeling guilt and helplessness over their choices but the way it was done felt a bit lame and without any real emotional punch#It felt more like an explanation to the reader in an awkward way. And there's a lot of empty chat about guilt and grief#without any of the characters really giving off a grieving air about everything and everyone they've lost#And this is precisely what I felt was going to happen with this manga's writing haha#I truly don't understand this kind of writing choices. Contrary to some other shonen writers this author did seem to have the potential#to write this kind of thing well besides the worldbuilding and powers and fight stuff. It's truly a pity. It so breaks my heart#And still this is considered one of the good shonens. Well. WELL haha#I do think shonen can be good! I just think it falls almost always even when there's potential into bery shallow writing#I don't know. Maybe I should read that one Alchemist manga#I've been repeatedly told that one's good and it does seem like it doesn't do... this. But I find the art style so not to my linking#I wish I had never gotten into JJK for real for real. I absolutely adore it. I always end up frustrated. It could be so good. Genuinely good#And yet it's just okay in a sort of forgettable way. What a pity#Everything good ever is present but it never dares do anything to fully explore what it sets. It just does the typical shonen stuff
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JETKO ANGST EDIT sorry
romantic homicide - d4vd
#zuko hates jet for leaving the world too soon without a proper goodbye (or so he thinks)#this is the time period when zuko is grieving over jet thinking that he died#but he is in fact not dead….#jetko#zuko never stopped thinking about that boy from the ferry#love happened on that boat#their broken hearts became one#zuko#jet atla#atla#ok bye#jetkostorm edits
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A letter written by Elvis for Frances Forbes (pictured right) in 1958
“ Well I don’t know what ever made me decide to write a letter but I guess it’s because I am so homesick and lonely. I just want to tell you that I miss and love you all very much and I am just counting the hours until I can return and we will all be together again. I can hardly wait till I am back singing and making movies, and above all seeing the old gang again. I guess I miss mother more over here than anything because I am just now realizing that she won’t ever be here anymore (…) Well I will go for now just wanted you all to know that I was thinking of you. All my love, Frances. P.S. Have a merry Christmas kid, I wish I was with you, we’d have a ball, but maybe next Christmas ”
#no matter how many friends or girlfriends he surrounded himself with#no one could fill the hole in his heart that Gladys’ left with her passing#he would always feel lonely without her#and he never even got to grieve properly as he was shipped away to Germany so quickly#god it breaks my heart to think about how much he was hurting 😭#elvis presley#elvisaaronpresley#elvis#gladys presley#frances Forbes#army Elvis#elvis fans#elvis history#elvis photos#elvis letters#50s#50s elvis
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"I didn't want to believe it either.
...He's the brother of a good friend."
#khdr#invidia hort art#kh hoder#kh vidar#khdr spoilers#kingdom hearts#kingdom hearts dark road#screams cries explodes etc etc. you get the idea#hey did you ever notice that their outfits match by being asymmetrical on the same side#something something (insert rambling about how both baldr and vidar (and vala vali) specifically as charas were actively grieving and how#vidar's Big Emote Moments are interacting w/ odin and only starts showing stuff post the 'never coming back' thing in agrabah.#also the. 'didn't think he'd turn on you' line <-implying he fully expected that baldr would strike him down without a thought. bottom text#in general my opinion is people should write more prequel stuff re: vidar and hoder's friendship and upperclassmen stuff in gen#invidiatech art
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today is my brothers 21st birthday. instead of taking him to his first visit to a dispensary i’m on a flight to california to be in the same room as the person who was responsible for his death. and all of the fbi and doj motherfuckers who have continued to destroy my families lives
#y’all have no idea i was on a hiatus when the first one happened#technically it’s the third hearing the other twos sentencing hearing in april this is the third#the fourth and final one will be in either august or december#i didn’t even tell yall the fuckery that happened after the last one#it’s been a literal nightmare and it’s a mess#new trauma every time these mother fuckers do anything#*the fbi i could give a shit about this defendant he’s#he’s going to prison the fbi and doj walk free and they’ve caused#even more trauma than just the trauma of losing him#i am a mess and not ok#i don’t even know if i’m gonna say the same victim impact statement i might just talk from the heart bc im so tired of all of us#i want to grieve my brother without extra trauma that the u.s. government has given my family#i’ll be dissociating on here for#the next 24 hours i’m so not ok and i can’t believe i have to be in a federal#courthouse for a second time :)
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I love you all so much, and if there ever is anything, at all, that you need to get off of your chest or scream into the void, I'm here for you. My anon asks and DMs are always open from now until the end of time.
No matter what, you're never truly alone. ❤️
If you're looking for additional support and/or want to talk to a professional on behalf of yourself, a loved one, or even a stranger:
CDC Website for Mental Health Resources in the U.S.
Directory of International Mental Health Hotlines (9 Countries)
Local Websites and Emergency Contact Numbers (Global)
International Mental Health Support
Global/Regional Mental Health Resource Hub
#i love my brother so much and I would be truly lost in life without him#my heart aches for the family and the fandom#i wish that the family and fans can grieve and find peace someday ❤️
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🌺 (Il’lyana to Nisha, and Rei to Leon)
Send 🌺 to hear what my muse likes about yours | Accepting!
@fctedivided
"I do not like, nor love, nor hate anything or anyone; I must admit she's efficient though. But...if she steals my mark a second time, I will dissect her alive and make sure she feels every sharp edge of my blade."
"Leon is...nice. Perhaps too nice. I hope nobody tries to take advantage of that fact..."
#ღ: a grieving girl wishing for retribution (rei)#ღ; without heart; without soul (il'lyana)#fctedivided
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Honestly I get so emotional about Franziska von Karma because she’s just such a great character. But she can so easily be seen as one dimensional and it hurts my soul when that happens.
#she’s got so much love in her heart you just don’t get it old#and yeah she gets mad but like it’s s human emotion.#and her anger comes from love#she’s mad about injustice#she’s mad that her brother was hurt#she’s mad that her father is the reason why her brother is hurt#she’s mad because her brother and father are gone#she’s mad because she’s grieving#she’s mad because she’s hurt#she’s mad because she’s afraid to be without her family#I love her so much and i could write essays.#instead I cry#ace attorney#Bailey post tm
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.
#its dumb of me but a few days ago i went with his deadname on google to see if i could see more stuff about his dead#since his friends who were alqo supposed to be my friends did a 'ceremony' together without telling me#even tho i rly wanted to go to be able to grief and to cry it out properly#so since i havent been able to grieve well i did that. search for his deadname. i just wanted to know#and i found out that a page for him was made on the tdor website. there were a ton of details on what was happening#before and after his death#many things i didnt know about. because i was a shit friend and never kept contact. and also because he was secretivz#i feel awful since then. who was i to him. why couldnt i help him. why am i even sorry for myself. he was the one suffering#i keep crying and i cant sleep at night without reading comics until i feel too tired to open my eyes#because otherwise im thinking too much about him. its just too awful. too unjust#i have. weird cravings for alcohol. ive never even drinked much before. im scared of starting to get addicted#but sometimes i wanna get somethibg anything and just drink until i pass out since people say its good to forget#i wish he were still alive. i wish i could hug him and help him. i wish id visited him in the hospital after his 1st mental breakdown#he had sent me a text to tell me he was there but i had work and i was tired and honestly too lazy to go. and now i regret it so bad#its all so unfair. death is so unfair. grief is so unfair. i was afraid i had no heart before because people who died around me didnt#phase me much. i didnt cry. but now that ive experienced the deaths of 2 actually very close people counting one i couldnt grieve forproper#i just wish i had no emotions. that i wouldnt cry when i think of them. but especially him.#and i cant stop thinking about how awful ill be when my parents die. ill be a wreck.#im just crying in my bed and its 4am. everythibg sucks. im so sorry to everyone whos ever met me. im awful#negative /#death m /#suicide m /
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"he told me how much he hoped you'd be happy too. get tired of being just a pure cold detective. be human instead." i hope you DIE i hope we ALL DIE. IN WHAT WORLD IS POIROT A COLD UNFEELING UNCARING LONER. ROMANTIC LOVE IS NOT A REQUIREMENT FOR BEING CONSIDERED HUMAN. explodes
#HE HAS FRIENDS!! HE HAS QUIRKS AND IDIOSYNCRASIES AND THINGS HE FINDS FUNNY AND THINGS HE FINDS HORRIFYING!#literally how do you make this mistake. it's not even like with sherlock holmes where i can conceivably see#how someone would think he's cold and unfeeling. poirot has always been a fun quirky character!#he laughs at jokes he makes jokes he admires his own moustache for his in the mirror#he comforts the grieving and bereaved and wronged every way he can on MULTIPLE occasions#he has friends including a BEST FRIEND that he mentions often in conversation#and who he's very fond of and who he's so so delighted to see again in his last adventure#poirot's last words. his LAST SPOKEN WORDS to ANYONE in the ENTIRE series before he dies#are 'cher ami!' to his best friend hastings. and it's just after a fight too as hastings is storming out.#he never gets to hear it back. yes i cried really hard when i read that book for the first time what of it.#my point is. at no point in christie canon has anyone ever had reason to consider poirot a 'brain-without-a-heart' type#and by jumping on the heartless detective bandwagon this movie is committing#some pretty heartless character assassination. he's not MEAN in this i'll admit#but the charm isn't really there. god. kenneth branagh has never been a good choice for poirot at all
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This is just a random venting post but I love how I was able to perceive the difference between my maternal and paternal families respect for one another, and in turn what it meant to TRULY love someone.
My dads side of the family was very toxic with one another, my grandfather hid a secret child (who they left in their home country when they immigrated((don’t worry we came into contact with him about 40 years later and they are wonderful people))) and my grandmother (who I truly loved but was never extremely close too) had some toxic hangups when it came to giving and/or expressing her love for us (for example hating and belittling my mom and not showing any interest or care, honestly straight up ignoring, my baby brother while showering me in gifts that, admittedly, were never in the realm of things I would use/like ex. Diamond earrings or extremely frilly dresses((I have no peircings and was extremely tomboy-ish)), my dads sister I have met maybe 3 times in my life and could barely tell you anything about her.
Compared to my maternal family it’s honestly impressive that I have never once had any questions about what it meant to be cherished and loved. My grandparents on my moms side doted on me and my brother, and all of our cousins equally, we all have personalized nicknames that we call them by (papa and hammer, when I was a baby I couldn’t say gramma so I said “g…hammer” and that’s been her name ever since lmao) and are called by them (I’m cricket… honestly love it even though it’s a bit silly). We spend every major and minor holiday with them, my mom and her sister in law (my aunt who aka is my favourite family memebr) helped raise each others children and helped overcome the loss of my uncle and baby cousin. I can’t stress enough how impactful it was to know that my mom and my aunt banded together to help take care of my aunts two young girls in the face of this loss, only for my aunt to turn around and help my mom raise me and my brother! For gods sake, I was almost born in the back of my aunts brand new sports car because the doctors didn’t believe my mom was in labour, I was very very premature, but my aunt insisted she drive her to the hospital (that’s why my middle name is her name haha) and I am very excited to have a hand in raising my cousins baby girls! We all have family reunions every five or so years and the 80+ of us will all gather and exchange birthday gifts and catch up on each others lives.
I just think that’s it’s beautiful that you can form a bond so strong with people who don’t live near you or that you rarely see, because that’s the real meaning of family. It’s not the people you have blood ties too but it’s the people you care about who step up and support you in the toughest or times.
#honestly I could go on a rant for days about how amazing my maternal family side is#keep in mind this is not restricted to blood relations#my aunt Katie died extremely young and unexpected from a heart defect#and my aunt and cousins (keep in mind this was just a very good family friend) took in her horse and raised him because they knew how much#he meant to her and that her family would need some reprieve to grieve her terrible and sudden loss#I’ve taken care of kids who I don’t even know how I knew them but I knew they were FAMILY#hell my cousin (once? twice?) removed lives with us for a year#idk man it’s something about rural areas in BC that just bring people together without spreading hate#if any of y’all need a supportive redneck family hit my fucking line we can vibe#just knowing that I have people in my corner no matter what is so liberating#they are also (somewhat shockingly) very lgbtq+ friendly#learned that when my grandma was talking about the verbal smack down she got into with a distant relative who was disrespecting#a trans relative we had (apologizes for the vagueness we have such a huge fucking family)
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