#happy to talk books with u any time u need a rec or want to rec something to me

[explosionshark]

hiii i just wanted to ask two things: 1. how do you find so much time to read as much as you do? i have several books on my shelf that i'm going through at a snail's pace, lol. and 2. with as much music you listen to, do you ever get a song stuck in your head distracting you as you read? i feel like this happens to me all the time

Hey! The answer for the first question is multi-part, so I hope you don't mind me rambling a bit.

The shortest possible version is that it's a mix of routine and the fact that (aside from listening to music) reading is my primary form of entertainment. I mean, I DO watch movies and TV, but usually with other people. When I'm alone and relaxing after work, it's usually with a book.

Tbh over the last handful of years I've noticed myself having a harder time focusing on watching shows or movies without being distracted. I'll go into something with the intention to focus and absorb and find myself eight minutes in with my phone in my hand, having to rewind bc I got distracted scrolling through my messages or my Tumblr feed or whatever and I've missed something. Reading is easier for me to focus on when I'm by myself because I can't multitask it. I'm doing it or I'm not.

Another thing that helps is mixed mediums. I'm pretty lucky in that the job I have allows me to wear headphones, so I can take advantage of audiobooks. Reading shorter books and novellas also helps make that book count bigger at the end of the year and shorter formats like that can help if you feel like you're intimidated by or struggling with a longer work. At the end of 2022 my final count was 71 total books - broken down it's 36 novel-length books (ebook or physical format), 13 novellas (sub 200 pages) and 22 audiobooks.

All this is very practical but a huge part of this is like motivation, right? Part of the reason it's easy for me to make reading into a habit is I stay excited. And a big part of that is quitting.

I love quitting! I think there's no wrong reason to quit a book. It sounds counterintuitive but when I was first getting back into reading, allowing myself to seek out books that were entertaining to me and to drop books I wasn't enjoying very much was a huge factor. I'm not saying there's no reason to read challenging books or push yourself, but people read for different reasons and since I'm reading primarily for entertainment, it's nice to give myself the freedom of not having to meet some arbitrary standard for "important" work and just to read about what if a lady fell in love with her hot boss or what if there was a monster in your spaceship or whatever.

Lastly, I'm always looking for new recommendations. There's a few booktubers I like, there's some subreddits for horror and SFF I keep up with, a couple podcasts I'm into, book review websites I check in on and, of course, stuff my friends push in front of me. It's easier to stay motivated or hyped up to keep reading if you're plugging into a shared experience, right? It's fun to share in someone else's excitement!

Anyway I know that's a long, messy answer but hopefully it's thorough. If you're having a hard time bc you're not really thrilled with what you're reading, I'd try putting it aside for now and looking for something to get you really excited. If you're into it but struggling anyway, I think you could try starting small by just setting aside 30 minutes or an hour every day at the same time and reading as much as you can within that timeframe! Make it something that's just part of your day.

And as for the second question - not really. I like having music on in the background while I read, so I don't usually have songs in my head distracting me. The only thing I can't really tune out is speech - it's really hard for me to read in a room where people are talking. If you're struggling with this a lot maybe try listening to some ambient music in the background while you read? Could help with distracting your brain enough to stifle the part that wants music, but hopefully not enough to keep you from paying attention to your book. Idk. (If you want ambient suggestions I'd say The American Dollar, Rachika Nayar, Olafur Arnalds, and Helios are all good places to start)

Anyway hiiiii happy new year, I hope something nice happens to you this week 💖

[embossross]

hi!! just an hour ago i came across your work of the devotion of the girl in the mirror and i’m hooked. i am sucked in and there is no getting out. not that i would want to anyway after crossing the initial hesitancy over the subject i’ve only ever briefly read up on.

the way u write has my brain buzzing with colors and sending shivers down my spine over the interactions and relationships ur creating. several times i wanted to eat my fist over rindou not being real, other moments i had to pause when i noticed how warm my cheeks and neck were from blushing. then at times, which compete for my favorite, were the literature references (+ your overall writing) that made me want to send this ask. moments that helped give the characters life. what literature and music, of any and all kinds, would u recommend??

like rindou i like to balance work and life, keeping them separate, and would love to read/explore new content while waiting to see what happens next and what it takes for rindou to crack a smile or a laugh. (there were several descriptions and details that were favorites but “Rindou’s laugh is as deep as his speaking voice. It seems to break free from him, resonant and rich. Even more rare than his smile, though no less precious.” is one that made me buzz whether it’s from the progress or wish to read him laugh idk i’m rambling) GAH your writing has ruined me in the best way possible. it’s been lots of fun so thank u for writing this and sharing. cant believe i’m gonna think about coins while drinking coffee

it has your brain buzzing with colors?!?!?!?! oh that's just the most beautiful compliment my writing has ever received. i'm shaking now!

describing someone's laugh is - i think - literally one of the hardest things to do without either losing the magic that is laughter or being a complete cliche, so that is SUCH a compliment to have you call that out 😊 like i'm seriously giddy reading this whole review/ask.

but getting to your question about lit recommendations...i legitimately gasped. that's my bag. that's my moment. i need a read more!!!

thank you so much for giving me an excuse to share ughhh i love it so much. unfortunately don't have any real music recs (like tbh i live by taylor swift), but i'll give you too many book recs to make up for it.

the biggest direct influences i thought about in this story - other than the ones i quote at the end are:

Snow Country by Yasunari Kawabata – though this is a less happy outcome, explores intimacy and a kind of doomed love. (note: this is an almost embarrassing reference because I am like a kindergartner compared to his writing)

The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath - girl in the mirror is actually a reference to this one as that was the working title. My themes about branching choices and the future are directly inspired by this novel.

The Idiot by Elif Batuman - collegiate coming of age stuff for reader 😊

Fanfiction! lots and lots of fanfiction. i reblog my faves from the anime fandoms but honestly, i've been reading for like 15 yrs now and i have a lot of fanfiction-isms in my writing. it's the biggest influence because you can't have 2 characters just sit down and talk and fall in love in published books. that's such a fanfic thing to try to capture that dialogue and process in its own right.

these aren't as direct or references for devotion of the girl in the mirror, but they are books i would recommend anyone and all deal with like love or eroticism or character in a way that i think largely impacts my writing:

Giovanni's Room by James Baldwin - I literally read this while writing the 1st draft, so I think the influence is probably there

Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Mexican Gothic by Silvia Garcia Moreno - so sexy

Palimpsest by Catherynne M. Valente - best erotic writing, not best sex, best eroticism

After the Winter by Guadalupe Nettel

A Manual for Cleaning Women by Lucia Berlin - live & die for her writing and ability to convey rich characters

The Ten Loves of Mr. Nishino by Kawakami Hiromi

In the Miso Soup by Ryu Murakami - NOT SEXY OR ROMANTIC but does impact some of the writing about tokyo specifically, especially the criminal underbelly

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

~*~

1. I am searching for a time travel fix-it that wasn't on any of the three time travel rec posts. It was short (>2k I think) and didn't deal with how WWX/LWJ changed things but rather the after affects of remembering the way it *had* been before the time travel- the scene I remember is WWX in LWJ's arms having woken from a nightmare and LWJ reassuring him that none of the other timeline's things would happen. Any ideas? Thanks!

FOUND? Memories of a Life Never Lived by donutsweeper (T, 1k, wangxian, time travel, fix-it, hurt/comfort, memories, nightmares)

~*~

2. Hi for the next fic finder I'd really like some help finding this fic - it was time travel i think modern wwx travels back because there was a book sent to him and it said that only wei ying can use (?) it idk how he did but he ends up in a room or so with everyone including people that died. It was a few years after the siege before he was summoned. He wakes up confused cause he sees his husband but not his husband cause of his outfit and hair. I remember a scene where lwj cradled his head because he thought he saw red and his hair was cut and thought wwx was injured but it was actually wwx having an undercut with red hair dye. Then they all talk about what happened years ago and wwx tells them past wwx's pov cause the book was actually his diary/journal. Oh additional scene: wwx gets angry because ayuan doesn't call him baba after he realizes that lsz is his baby ayuan and why he wasn't there to raise him. Thank you! 

~*~

3. Hello, thank you for the hard work. I need help in finding a fic. It is post canon where WWX was kidnapped. LWJ and JWY, and a whole lot of cultivators from different sects where there to investigate. Chenqing was found in his room, in an inn. The room was wrecked, signs of struggles and all. Then people who are close to WWX tried to take his flute, because it rejected some arsehole who tried. LWJ ended up using it to locate WWX, only playing their song. He ended up with chapped lips. @aeszdjie​

FOUND! something wild calls you home by Fleetling (T, 9k, wangxian, kidnapping, injury, rescue, love confessions, first kiss, happy ending, Mojo’s post)

~*~

4. hi!! i rly cant find this fic so its p much set during the cloud recesses study arc but canon divergence? has some ocs as well but the only occurring ones r the lan sect ocs

i dont remember the specifics but lan qiren eventually talks to wei wuxian abt whether or not he feels challenged in his class n when wwx says no, lqr sends him off to a lan tailsman class

(beforehand the teacher of said class tested him n wwx went NUTS. the test was something abt protecting a wifes coffin? but the protection array didnt work at all n it got robbed within x amnt of months n the teacher said essentially what can wwx do to solve the problem of the array)

other prominent plot points are:

- nhs helps wwx at one point to dress up when wwx invited lwj to caiyi town (to find a thank u gift for lqr) n told him to say he forgot his coat n made his waist look smaller w a belt. on the date wx shares an umbrella, ate at a place both jades enjoyed, lwj ravishes wwx when wwx confessed n basically mauled his neck and lwj gave wwx his coat (white coat, blue embroidered cloak) — not in order

- lwj and wwx eventually got betrothed bc lqr caught them getting a lil too frisky in a hidden but public space for a second time (first time was the library). wwx had to publically secede from yunmeng jiang in order for the betrothal to go thru and he suffered a major panic attack bc jiang fengmian pulled him out during the alloted break to basically trauma dump on wwx — saying how he thought he could keep wwx at lotus pier but in the end he was still like his father, leaving him alone. jfm essentially saw wwx as an extension of cssr and wcz (more of the latter tho i think) n not as his own person. after jfm confirms wwx wants to do this and its not a joke he acts cold to wwx n calls him via courtesy name.

- drunk lan shenanigans. wx, jc, nhs and an oc went out to celebrate that wx and the oc r betrothed n wwx/jc/nhs convinced both lans to drink. oc went nuts n starts becoming loud n almost ran off to see his fiancee and lwj jumps out the window w wwx to do something that i dont remember.theres more but im p sure it could be tagged as explicit bc ykno wangxian as teenagers n courting… Yeah… thank u for ur help if u find it!! **I swear I have read this exact fic but for the life of me I can’t remember it :’) ~Mod L**

FOUND! Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 310k, wangxian, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, feelings   realization, getting together, fix-it of sorts, not JFM friendly, blood & gore, WIP)

~*~

5. Hello I have been following for a while for recomendations, I have lives many of them, but I can not find this fic that was an Adams Family au. It was si cure and fun and it was wangxian as the parents of an extended family with Minjue as a zombie, Meng Yao doing the business deals, and Xichen being a medium. Do You know it?

FOUND! The Altogether Ooky WangXian Family by FluffyHippogriff (T, 52k, wangxian, 3zun, JYL/JZX, BSSR/LY, Addams Family au, kid fic, comedy, found family, WIP)

~*~

6. not sure if this fic exists or is just a fever dream: Jin prison camp crimes are discovered bc Wei Wuxian is discovered in one— after having been presumed dead since sometime around the fall of lotus pier. Jins basically rolled up all the prisoners the Wen had who they didn’t recognize as being worth returning to someone valuable. Wei Wuxian of course basically adopts Wen Yuan in the camp.

FOUND? ❤️The Third Young Master of the Qishan Wen by KouriArashi (T, 139k, wangxian, xiyao, chengqing, romance, angst w/ happy ending, hurt/comfort, politics, revenge, families of choice, pining, Mojo’s post)

FOUND? ❤️Where the nightingales are singing, and a white moon beams. by Moominmammashandbag (M, 52k, wangixan, jin zixuan & lan wangji, no powers au, grief/mourning, aftermath of war, angst w/ happy ending, reunions, fluff & smut, Mojo’s post)

~*~

7. Hi, I need help in finding a LXC/JGY fic where jgy kinda orchestrates wangxian getting together bc wangji is pining and sad that is making lxc sad and jgy is done TM with wangji pining and wants is husband to be happy and focus on their relationship. He's worried that if lxc finds out his scheming he'll hate him but then lxc reveals that he knew and loves him for it. Jgy was married into Lan and I think he didn't join the Jin before, but if remember correctly jgs asks to legitimize him for political advantages after he marries lxc and he's really mad about it. Thank you!!

FOUND? a micro utopia born as the overture plays by tardigradeschool (T, 18k, LXC/JGY, wangxian, canon divergence, fix-it, marriage, fluff, scheming, everyone lives au, kid fic)

FOUND? No More Masks by KouriArashi (M, 63k, LXC/JGY, JGY/XY, wangxian, fix-it, angst w/ happy ending, slow burn, redemption, hurt/comfort, dubious consent, implied/referenced child abuse, implied/referenced prostitution)

~*~

8. Hello, im looking for a fic where WangXian was getting married and it was WWX's pov. All i remember was that LWJ insisted on wearing the veil. In the end, it was revealed that it was because he couldn't stop smiling and didn't want any one else seeing him that happy. @aeszdjie​

FOUND! I think this one is Thinly Veiled by thunderwear (G, 1k, wangxian, post-canon, weddings, fluff, tenderness, love, kissing, intimacy, LWJ smiling)

~*~

9. Hey, I am looking for a modern fic in which lan zhan and wei ying are friends and lanzhan brings Wei Ying to his apartment now and then where he meets lan xichen and they become close. Lan zhan sees Wei Ying and his brother being close and comfortable with each other when he comes home which makes Lan zhan think Wei Ying likes Xichen and Lan zhan is jealous.But Wei Ying later tells him that he loves lan zhan and he had misunderstood Xichen and him.

FOUND! Smile for Me by kuro (T, 9k, wangxian, modern, college/university au, jealousy, fluff)

~*~

10. Idk , if this is right time to ask or not ..even here to ask **Yes, this is the right place and anytime is a right time ^^ MIght take some time for it to be posted tho! ~Mod L** but I have been trying to find this fics for like months A) This have teen wangxian...alpha wangji and omega weiying . When weiying gets pregnant he think that his bf will left him in all this lqr hears this and support WWX  I think this one morden au  B) this one was like arrange marriage thing where the elders lan told wuxian that wangji wasn't sexually active and not wanted wuxian to touch  him and  other hand wangji thinks wuxian was forced to marry so wuxian doesn't come closer to him.. this one may have 4 chapters @selflovingmedj

10A)

FOUND? In which Lan Qiren eavesdrops and gets a new nephew (and grandnephew) out of it by h0peless_oblivion (M, 62k, wangxian, modern, high school au, ABO, teen pregnancy, shotgun wedding, fluff & angst, family feels, humor, family drama, WIP)

10B)

FOUND? a light hidden and singing by occultings (microcomets) (E, 48k, wangxian, arranged marriage, pining, getting together, slow burn, misunderstandings, miscommunication, blood & injury, happy ending, smut)

~*~

11. Trying to find a  fanfic in which wwx was bullied in lotus pier by the disciples. In addition to the bullying, wwx ran errands for teachers and madam yu banned any swordsmith to make him sword. If you have any ideas, I would appreciate it 

~*~

12. I’m looking for a fic where after WWX saves the people from the Qiongqi path and it’s found out that it wasn’t just Wens in there but also people from other sects.

~*~

13. hello! i’m looking for a wangxian fic on ao3 where there was a yiling wei sect leaded by cssr and wcz. wwx was the heir and he had younger siblings. the wei sect and the lan sect were enemies. also all the sect heirs and people were sent to yiling sect for studies. lans kill wwx’s parents when wwx is away and it’s v sad when he comes back… also there is art in the fic. wwx becomes sect leader and wangxian gets together in the end. it’s completed btw. Note: It’s not “Balance” by AnaraneSindanarie

FOUND? Song Unwritten by Kytrin & Mslead (E, 94k, wangxian, temporary character death, angst w/ happy ending, fix-it of sorts, cql meets mdzs, parallel universes, transmigration, yiling wei sect au, YLLZ WWX)

~*~

14. hello! I am looking for a fic, it's post canon I think, where wwx leaves mxy's body and my comes back in his body. I don't remember what happened after that but I think there was a scene where mxy was confused why he was in bed with lwj and lwj called him 'wei ying?' and mxy said he wasn't wei ying. I really hope you can find this fic. @archiiishaaa

FOUND? A New Lease on Life by pearliegloom (M, 6k, wangxian, post-canon, body swap, fluff & angst, established relationship, past abuse, disturbing themes, happy ending)

~*~

15. Hi! I'm looking for a fic for a while and could use some help.  Parallel world setting, with wwx growing up a nei who had just died (sucide?) off screen. The fic takes place when nhs grabs a wwx (coreless, after cliffside sucide), because  wwx is brother-shapped and only, like, mostly dead as opposed to his world's wwx whose soul was, like, shattered? No sunshot war, in this parallel, idthink. ... short fic. Any idea?

FOUND? Chapter 13: Love and Acceptance of Short Prompts by Vrishchika (Nie WWX, dimensional travel, canon divergence, NHS pov)

~*~

[jikookpancakes]

JIKOOK FIC RECS that no one asked for (2021)

but im giving anyway because THE TALENT IN THIS FANDOM IS INSANE

long post incoming!! this is probably just part 1 because i wont stop reading anytime soon so i’m inserting that link just in case i do make another one in the future

What’s a Soul Really Worth, Anyway? by thisneedsmorefilth - 130k words, fantasy, demon!jm, witch!jk, listen, this and the next one are my top 2 jikook fics of all time, so well-written, plot so exciting legit reads like a book, better than a lot of books tbh, the world-building is INSANE, jungkook and the gang accidentally summon demon!jimin and chaos ensue, especially for jungkook...and you know why!!!, so funny, angsty, cried so much, happy ending but listen to me: you gotta read the sequel too, YOU GOTTA.

Militat Omnis Amans: The Beginnings by edaen - 92k words, fantasy, werewolf!jk, vampire!jm, forbidden love, super slow burn but super worth it, JIKOOK IN THIS IS MY FAVORITE JIKOOK IN ANY FIC EVER EVER EVER, this is the ultimate all or nothing will freeze hell over for the other kind of love, and the way this is written is just so... how do i describe it. like you can just tell the author wanted to be very realistic with their feelings. you’ve seen the word count, this is SLOW burn. like you will legit feel their struggle to just be able to love each other and while it hurts, it’s also SO GLORIOUS. i love this one so much and if you like reading angst with happy ending but like cranked up to 200% then read this. bonus feels if you read the whole series

Until Dawn (series) by edaen - this is the long series where the previous one above is part of. highly rec if you love fantasy and you wanna read about bts being a rag tag group of supernatural beings fighting evil yay. also it makes the above fic more satisfying because you see more of jikook just being tgt and in love (with bonus angst because of course)

7 Signs by NamHyora - 27k words, secret spies au, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm who is always used as a raven in their operations aka they use jimin and his attractive self to attract people and gather information or acquire targets and all that spy stuff, and his bestie alpha jk is not too happy about it hehe, friends to lovers, iove this one so much i wish it was longer but i think the author is planning to write a sequel!

Drop Like Confetti by annie_vi - 110k words, ceo!jk, age difference, age swap, ahhh i love this fic so much cause jimin smart and mature and has this no bs attitude, and he can keep up with jk despite the age gap and the difference in status/experiences, jk sexy dilf in this one eheh, i love it cause the drama/angst tackles a very real concern for such couples, like there’s no angst just for the sake of having angst, it really makes sense where they’re both coming from, they’re so whipped for eo too so love that for me

Fold it Up Like Origami by annie_vi - 99k words, gamer!jk, model!jm, same author as above and jk is so boyfriend goals in this one and in all this author’s fics in general like wow my standards are so high now i will legit be single forever just reading jikook fics (with no regrets), secret relationship due to their celeb status, well-written as usual, dialogues/banter in this author’s fics are just YES

The Tournament by kinkmins - 34k words, prince!jm, bodyguard!jk, abo, i’ll paste part of the summary here “Prince Jimin gets ready to hold a tournament where 50 alphas compete for a chance to court him, his father the king hires a new bodyguard who is a little too blunt and a little too talkative.“, i really love this oneeeee

Screwed Up and Brilliant by annie_vi - 113k words, escort!jk, jimin needed a date for a work event and in comes jungkook, escort extraordinaire with a no sex rule and jimin is just dasdkjfhasl, a lot of that “is this real or is he just acting” kinda angst, fluff smut angst

Like Everything Glows by annie_vi - 180k words, merman!jm, aquatic vet!jk, ok this is like my 4th rec from this author just read all their fics you’re welcome, this is their first fantasy fic but soso good, i rec’d this to someone who doesn’t really read fics and she really loved it and said “their love is so pure hhh”, she’s right

Track one: I love you by honeydice - 30k words, they’re “just” best friends, lots of pining it hurts, there’s some yoonmin and mentioned past jinmin in this so just noting in case, angst, denial of feelings, siiiiigh

InYou by edaen - 4k words, pwp :), abo, the morning after jikook mating, more sexytimes ensue + fluff

Falling For You Again by Rose_gold715 - 30k words, amnesia au, jk forgets about jimin and idk just something about this hits right in the feels. btw i don’t support the jk hated jm before in real life agenda so i don’t like this fic for that reason but i like this fic because i love me some good painful angst with happy ending.

The President’s Son by AmeliaBedelia - 55k words, bodyguard!jk, president’s son!jm, jk is assigned to shadow jm bc his life is under threat, and things develop :), jm is jk’s gay awakening :) :)

A Touch of Sin by pettey - 102k words, fantasy au, police officer!jk, supernatural!jm, shamanism, LOOK AT THE RANGE OF JIKOOK WRITERS YALL, this is such an interesting concept, so different from every other fic i’ve read, really well-written, sometimes you come across fics and you cant help but go “someone out there rly blessing me with this art for free”

Tears to the Tide by haromame - 65k words, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm, honestly there’s not a lot of abo elements it’s focused more on jungkook having ptsd as he just came from war, established relationship jikook, he comes back home to jimin and things have just... changed. except their love ok THEY LOVE EO SO MUCH this made me cry so f much ugh so good tho.

Zero Hour by edaen - 5k words, canon compliant, a little drabble based around rosebowl jikook, it’s part of a series/collection of canon compliant jikook so if you’re looking for more canon compliant here you go!!, also if you can’t tell already i tend to like several things from a single author, i haven’t read their other fics im legit saving for sad days but i am confident enough to say their other fics are also rec-worthy.

Wonder by wordcouture - 7k words, im sorry in advance, mcd :( pls take care of yourself, i don’t like sad endings ok i don’t, but this is so popular and i was like, ok let’s see what the hype is all about, i get it now, :((((((((((((((((((((, well-written tho, bc the author will manage to crush your heart in just 7k words ha ha

The Omega Revolution by PinkBTS  - 158k words, abo, alpha!jk omega!jm, dystopian au, the hunger games more specifically mockingjay vibes, angst with happy ending but there’s some...things... lost along the way and i think that’s realistic for a dystopian war au, well-written

Blind Switch - 226k words, jockey!jk, rich spoiled brat!jm, jm gets exiled to his grandparents ranch where he meets jk yeehaw, im sorry for the yeehaw, anyway fluff smut angst enemies friends to lovers hurt/comfort slow burn happy ending, all the good stuff, ugh jk so boyfriend goals, also the amount of fluff in the later chapters thank u writer

Finally by Rose_gold715 - 12k words, abo, alpha!jk, omega!jm, angst with happy ending, jikook mate out of convenience and jimin runs away from jk and his pack feeling unloved and outcasted, but jungkook goes after him :((

Park Jimin’s Guide to Good Housekeeping by Ashlyn17 - 235k words, fantasy au, when i say jikook has the best fic writers i mean jikook has the best fic writers because THE WORLD-BUILDING in this one?, THE PLOT TWIST?, yesyesyes, jungkook is a powerful fae and jimin is assigned to be his housekeeper hehe, listen my entire fic rec has several that could be great netflix shows and this is definitely one of them

A Spell That Reminds Me of Your Name by Chimneycricket - 42k words, wizards!au, enemies to friends to lovers and the development felt natural, well-written plus the author sometimes makes art of their fics and other jikook fics and posts on twitter, both their fics and art are so good, i’ve heard good stuff about their other fics too :)

that’s it for now!

just a quick one about my preferences: idc about tops/bottoms, i read just about anything but i prefer fantasy and multi-chaptered fics, i love established relationship jikook so hmu with recs anytime, i don’t like reading anything with cheating and mcd, i love fics where jk and jm are just so friggin in love they are just IT for eo, and at the end of the day even if there are elements to the fics i wouldn’t normally read, as long as they’re well-written then i’m all for it

[anythingtrxsh]

hi :) your blog inspired me to start my own fic rec account on twitter, so thank you for being so freaking cool!

i still wanted to ask tho, if you knew any found/instant family fics where taegguk become dads and/or if you know any good book/movie parody fics bcs i'm into that rn ♡

you wouldn't know any avatar, the last airbender fics, would you?

thank u so so so much again

YOU'RE ASKING ME FOR PARENTS AU??? oh thats NO biggie anon that's only like, my favorite trope, like ever. like. actually. wow. also, AAAAA good luck on your fic-reccing acc!!! do let me know the @ so i can follow you over there! fic reccing is fun as hell so i hope you have the best time doing it nonnie!

how to talk to other humans (and other valuable life skills) [148k] by drawingspaces {i dont know but just read it au-- theres nothing instant about this fic but man, the found family shit gets me EVERY . SINGLE . TIME}

refrigerator humming, chewing gum and instant karma [61k] by locks {mafia au– junseo my BOY i miss him sm like it physically hurts to not be reading him rn}

to always follow the sun [36k] bythruspring {set it up au-- it's more like a reimagining of that movie BUT its still the best fic ever, so. yeah}

bullet with butterfly wings [30k] by locks {{i dont know but just read it au pt. 2-- yujin's dad is everything to me}

here’s looking at you [23k} by smoltae {hospital au-- doctor tae is the hottest thing my brain ever came up with}

if you need even more dadfics do check out this tag, and as for avatar fics, you can check out these fics to see if any of them are to your liking!

happy reading!!

[weirdoldmanhoho]

do u have any fic recs?

Sorry it took me years to answer this! The truth was I really hadn't read many FMA fics (at least not since the FF days) and was waiting until I actually had some recs to give.

And now I have some! My list will surprise no one, I'm sure.

Soul Friends by KyberHearts

“They were not always, and simply, two minds in one body. Towards the latter part of their alliance, especially in the heat of battle and warmongering, their souls could not distinguish where the prince began and the sin ended.”

Ling Yao returns to Xing to seal his fate as the next Emperor and sets his plans for reunification and peace in motion.

Elsewhere, Alphonse Elric reconciles with the very Truth that stole his body.

I absolutely love the way this fic writes post-canon Alphonse and his relationship with Truth.

--

Damaged by xmypandabear

'"He's still in the hospital too, with the Lieutenant," Alphonse said dully. "Blood loss - someone slit her throat..." Ed stared up at the ceiling, remembered the scientist with the gold tooth, and shuddered at the image his brain conjured of the Lieutenant lying on the floor. "But Mei helped her! So, they're sharing a room - the Colonel and Hawkeye, I mean, not Mei, 'cause the Colonel can't use his hands yet, so she's helping him..."

"His hands?" Ed tried to remember.

"It's how they forced him to do it," Al whispered. "They pinned him down so he couldn't move."

Ed fought back nausea. The sense of wrong, wrong, wrong pervaded every sense of his being. How the fuck was any of that equivalent exchange?'

Love me a good post-promised day healing and processing fic. This one focuses a lot on how Al, Ed, Winry, and Roy are all doing immediately post-promised day and the relationships between all those characters.

--

Joining of Hands by ehmazing

If you're not breaking a couple of laws, is it really an Elric wedding?

Truly, the best thing about an AlMei wedding is all the hijinks and complications the come from foreign customs and marrying into royalty.

--

Legends by Elfpen

Alphonse Elric has been living and studying in Xing for a little more than a year and a half. Now, Ling has asked him - ordered him - to take on a new responsibility and fill the shoes vacated by Van Hohenheim four centuries ago. But what use are legends, really, when they're all frauds? The Son of Heaven and the Son of the Western Sage see it differently.

You ever find a fic that just feels completely catered to you and your interests? I love everything about this fic. Alphonse in Xing and the weird politics he has to maneuver as not only an incredibly skilled foreign alchemist but a close friend of the emperor's - all at a young age. His relationship with Hohenheim and the grief and confusion that comes from never really getting to KNOW Hohenheim and now having to come face to face with the lasting impact his father left on a foreign country. Ling scheming. It's all very, very good.

--

The Principle of Mentalism by The-Immortal-Moon (LunaKat)

There’s a woman with a wrench and a penchant for alcoholism, and what he doesn’t know is that she’s going to change everything.

Another fic that feels like it was written specifically for my interests. This one explores Pinako and Hohenheim's first meeting and how a rowdy mechanic from Resembool and a reserved guilt-written immortal from Xerxes ever became friends in the first place. Features Hohenheim and his one million soul friends and a young awkward Pinako who I want to give SUCH a big hug to. I love it so much.

--

We'll be Holding on Forever by zipadeea

"Hohenheim left them to save the world. But Dad loved them more than everything in the world."

AU where Alphonse gets his body back a little earlier on the Promised Day.

It changes nothing.

It changes everything.

Read this if you want to cry. It focuses on Ed and Hohenheim's relationship and it is full of pain but also healing and understanding. Great quick read.

--

ticket stubs and your diaries by nerdywriiterchild

Alphonse Elric is almost fifteen. He will never know Xerxes.

This one is short but packs a powerful emotional punch and a really interesting character study into only a few paragraphs. Explores the really interesting question: what is it like to mourn a culture you're a part of but will never really know?

--

Briding Her Time in Wait

The wedding date was set. Winry and Ling had screamed at one another for months during the preparation out of a mutual need for their childhood friend and half-sister to have the most incredible wedding in the history of either Amestris or Xing, and as a result the wedding canopy suffered from a unique blend of western and eastern traditions that left guests from both sides of the desert confused and requesting refills on drinks that didn’t exist. Still, the two wedding planners manipulated the day into running smoothly, Ling pulling his Emperor card when necessary, Winry pulling her, well, Winry card when necessary, while Ed and Lan Fan stood awkwardly around the food table making small talk that mostly consisted of complaints about automail. By the time the golden groom was ushered through a beautification process that left him requiring an escort to avoid the various women—and men—attempting to seduce him at the last minute, the guests were settled and the wedding was ready to roll.

Except no one knew where the hell the bride had gone.

I'm always a sucker for Scar and Mei's relationship.

--

One More Time, With Feeling

In the end the Elric brothers laughed over the irony: The traveller had settled to write books on alchemy while juggling two boisterous children blessed with Rockbell rockheadedness and Elric recklessness, and the settler had taken to travelling between Amestris and Xing for the remainder of his life. It came, really, with having two homes.

-------------------------------------------------------

A bird could love a fish, but where would they live?

This one explores Alphonse's relationship with Mei post-series and is VERY in line with how I picture it. Being in love with a foreign princess in line for the throne with a duty to her people and country would make for a very complicated and often strained relationship.

--

Magic and Mind by Preelikeswriting

Of all things Edward was prepared for as the day of reckoning grew near, being transported from one world on the edge of war to another was not one of them.

AKA: Edward gets accidentally summoned by Death Eaters, and neither party is happy.

(Pre-Promise Day, HP book 5)

Ok so preface: I rarely like crossover fics and I very rarely like HP crossover fics, but this one just works for me. I think what I like so much about it is that Edward doesn't just get thrown into the world of HP and join the golden trio / order and start fighting Voldemort. Oh no. He does not care about their fight at all. He just wants to get back home and will do anything he needs to to achieve that, even if it makes him look like he's working with Death Eaters or going against Harry and friends.

I think the fun of this fic is that it kind of plays around with the fact that the READER knows who the good guys are of each series and would expect them to join forces. Sure, Ed is the Good Guy of FMA and Harry and friends are the Good Guys of HP, but Ed's goals don't really align with Harry's goals and so they're not really working together, and Ed kind of comes off looking shady af to the HP characters despite the fact that the reader knows why he's doing what he's doing. It's a far more interesting take on Ed goes to HP world than "Ed immediately joins the fight against Voldemort."

The series has three works so far and I haven't finished it, but I really loved the first and what I've read of the second. It also eventually heads into Ed/Draco territory which is not a ship I would have initially read but.....kind of works for me here.

[hyenahunt]

Jun Sazanami - Idol Story 2

Writer:  Kino Seitaro

Season: Summer

Characters: Jun, Nagisa

Proofreading: 310mc (JP) & Skyress (ENG)

Translation: hyenahunt

Nagisa: ...What I'm reading now is a long novel titled "In Search of Lost Time", written by Proust. Have you read it before, Jun?

[Location: Cospro Office]

Jun: ......

Nagisa: ......

Jun: (Man, this feels weirdly awkward...!)

(It's just me and Nagi-senpai here... Usually we either gather as all four members of Eden, or as the two of us in Eve.)

(So it's pretty rare for just us to be alone together like this.)

(It looks like he's reading some kinda complicated book, so I probably shouldn't try to make some awkward small talk or anything, right~?)

(Seems like I'm gonna have to wait here in the office for another half an hour, so maybe I'll just pick out some manga and do some reading too.)

(If I remember correctly, we've got some free manga lying around here from a collab we did — )

Nagisa: ...Jun. Is there something you'd like to talk to me about?

Jun: Eep!?

W-what's up, Nagi-senpai? Hearing you talk outta the blue made me jump a lil'.

Nagisa: ...My apologies. I didn't mean to startle you.

...It's just that you seemed to be concerned about me in some way. I simply wanted to apologise if I'd done something to trouble you.

Jun: Nah, you haven't done anything like that. I was just wondering what kinda book you're reading, really!

I'm not all that familiar with big books like that, so I was just wondering if you wouldn't mind telling me what it was...

Nagisa: ...I see. Come to think of it, reading is one of your hobbies, isn't it?

...I believe you mentioned in an interview that you read a lot whenever Hiyori-kun isn't around, or something to that effect.

Jun: Yeah, absolutely! Whenever Ohii-san's around, he's so noisy that it's impossible to focus.

So I read a lot more when I'm alone in my room, y'see~

Nagisa: ...Is that so? You sound like quite the avid reader.

Jun: Ahaha. I wouldn't go so far as to call myself that, but you might be right there... ♪

(Whew, that was close...! Nagi-senpai might look like he's spaced out half the time, but he picks up on the smallest things~ Well, that's him and his perceptiveness for you.)

( — Wait, huh? Did I just proclaim myself an avid reader...?)

Nagisa: ...What I'm reading now is a long novel titled "In Search of Lost Time", written by Proust. Have you read it before, Jun?

Jun: Uhhh. Proo...?

Nagisa: ...Proust. He was one of the most influential authors of the twentieth century.

Jun: Oh, right. Sorry, I've never read it before. I'm kinda clueless about that kinda stuff, y'see.

Nagisa: ...Well then, would you like to try?

Jun: Wha?

Nagisa: ...I have no doubts about my own memory, so it's no issue if I were to lend this to you midway through reading it.

...I figured I'd try every now and then to read literature regarding the humanities, as you can gain a more thorough understanding of human nature from them.

This book is particularly interesting as it clearly depicts concepts of the human mind, and explores them, too.

...So if you'd be interested, I'd also like for you to read it, Jun.

Jun: Oh, um, well... I feel bad borrowing it while you're in the middle of reading, yeah~? And on top of that, it looks hella complicated, so I think I'm gonna pass.

I mean, I don't really read serious books like that... I don't have a clue about all those refined books you read, y'know~...?

Nagisa: ...Well then, what kind of books do you read?

Jun: Uhh, well. It's a lil' embarrassing to say...

Nagisa: ...If you've been merely playing the constructed persona of an avid reader for the sake of interviews, and all your answers were in fact falsities, then that would be rather disappointing.

Jun: N-noo, you've got the wrong idea...! Ibara's whole constructed idol character strategy's got nothing to do with me!

I do read books and all, but um, how should I put this.... What I read is manga, y'see.

Nagisa: ...Manga?

Jun: Yep. Sometimes I pick up the odd light novel, too, but for the most part I pretty much just read manga.

I'm real sorry for getting your hopes up. Even I've been thinking about how I really gotta educate myself a lil' more, you know?

Nagisa: ...I see.

...However, is there any issue with enjoying manga?

Jun: Come again?

Nagisa: ...Be it novel or manga, the fact that they are both works of writing doesn't change. Why do you feel the need to put yourself down for it, Jun?

...Personally, I believe one would derive the same kind of entertainment from either of them.

Jun: Wha—!?

Y-You're right~ That should be the case, huh...?

After seeing you read such complicated books, I felt a lil' self-conscious telling you I read manga, but...

You've got a point there — neither's better than the other, huh?

Nagisa: ...Indeed. Precisely because there is such diversity amongst people, competing for the merits of entertainment is a pointless errand.

...While we're on the topic, would you introduce me to what manga you read, Jun?

Jun: I'd be happy to give you some recs, but... I can't be sure if you'll like them, though?

Nagisa: ...Thank you. Rather than judging a book by its cover, it would surely be better to find out by reading it myself.

...I too will try to gain a better understanding of your interests, Jun.

...In exchange, I'll lend you Proust's works as I'd like you to read them.

Jun: G-gotcha! I dunno if I'll be able to read 'em all the way to the end, but since it's no fair if I'm the only one giving recs, I'll take on the challenge!

Nagisa: ...Fufu. If you are to learn the pleasures of sating your own intellectual curiosity, Jun, then I too would be delighted.

...Here you go. This is the complete set of "In Search of Lost Time".

Jun: U-um, pardon me, Nagi-senpai, but... The heck's up with this absolute mountain of books?

Nagisa: ...Why do you ask? There are merely a dozen or so volumes in total.

...You look rather surprised, though. Is there something wrong?

...Perhaps this number of books is indeed too much for you?

Jun: O-oh, um, not at all. Seeing such a huge stack of books was just a lil' overwhelming, I guess...?

I'm gonna give reading it a go so that I can grow as knowledgeable as you, Nagi-senpai~ But man, I dunno how many months it'll take me, y’know...?

✦✦✦✦✦

← prev ✦ all ✦ next →

[ruby-whistler]

Are you normal or do u sometimes go "IVE BEEN SCARED OF SLEEPING WITH THE LIGHTS ON(off? Idk its hard to decipher)"/lyrics -curious anon

me: oh boy, can't wait to try and make a tumblr blog! Before i do i should research it- *what in the hecking heck is an xkit*

djskdjsk i had no idea what an xkit was until yesterday and when i got it i got too confused and uninstalled it - dw curious anon i don’t use it either i just vibe and do whatever i guess. if you tag correctly and make good posts things should work out, can’t wait to see your acc around!

I got some sad-ist merch :DDD!!

yooo!! that’s so pog for you! it’s probably pretty comfy :D

me standing ominously in your askbox waiting to rec my fav fics:

fjsjdjsk i literally just finished passerine i still have 80 more (some of which are like 300k words long) on my to-read but uh if they have c!dream mischaracterized i’ll not be reading them anyways so it’s very hit-or-miss, will probably get through some of them quicker-

After many moons spent under the dsmp, seeing discourse and analysis alike, i have come to the conclusion i simply do not have the energy to care about any lore outside of c!tubbo and c!tommy's and will only defend them. And that is ok. It is ok to not watch or care about all dsmp or want to discourse about them or analyze. Idk man was thinking deep thoughts today

it’s ok to watch entertainment and enjoy it the way you want to! it’s great to want to enjoy or talk about your fav character!

the problems come up when you attack other people for their perspectives on the medium or spread misinformation about different characters based on only watching the perspective you like, but you know - if you’re not doing analysis, you really don’t need to look that deep into it.

it’s ok to just chill. your feelings about characters are valid! :D so yeah i agree with you! let people with different opinions exist if they’re also being respectful (e. g. tagging correctly).

Hey ik u worked with animgician's newest vid and i found a not-crit (i rlly think) little thought on it if u wanna see it

yoo feel free to send it in!!

No one: me: *shuffles around* wanna hear about my cool warden c!tommy au?

may i interest u in a little bit of my writing? If not that is ok i just wanna see if my writing is any good before working on a fic lol

Anyways if i am not in the askbox for a little it is because i am now writing a proper fic thing out. Wish me luck o7 -curious anon (i have three different lyrics i am going to be incorporating and a little analysis and just a smidgen of projection)

Ruby do u wanna read a little something i wrote? *does the little fingers thing* its really short just a headcanon with a little prose

i sure do! that sounds rlly cool - are you sure you don't wanna make a post about that on your own account though? i don't mind seeing it at all but i think the c!tommy tag would be able to appreciate that au better than my followers. you've gotta find the right target audience, y'know? /lh

though of course i'd love to see your writing, i'm sure it's great! looking forward to it :]

Ayo i remembered u talking about how punitive punishment doesn't work the other day so i want to discuss. What would u consider to be a fitting "punishment" for c!dream's canonic killing of mexican dream?/gen

i mean... we're not trying to - being against punitive justice is about the fact punishment is wrong, not just certain types of it. asking me what a "fitting punishment" would be is sort of very not getting the point.

hurting people further is not going to teach them anything and it’s not going to help anyone, why is it necessary?

so the answer is: none. he shouldn’t be punished, actually! he should learn on his own that what he did wasn’t right, and that’s about it. that’s the thing about transformative justice. him becoming a better person who Wouldn’t Do That again because it goes against who he is.

however, there’s also restorative justice, which is working to “make it up” to the victims. to which i propose; dream has the revival book and could literally bring him back once he is out of the prison. give him some powder maybe. md would probably be chill w/ that.

Yknow. In all my time in dsmpblr i can confidently say that the main differnece between c!dream apologist/enthusiants and c!wilbur/sam ones is that the c!wilbur/c!sam ones want their fav to have a breakdown and c!dream ones want theirs to get positive reinforcement /hj /lh

i’m pretty sure the sam and wil ones also want them to get better/get redeemed, at least deep down, but i get what you mean! you’re *glances at the 🟩⛏ gc where all we do 24/7 is write angst about c!dream being terribly hurt and then we cry about it* 100% correct. no angsters who like the pain here *nervously laughs* we all just want him to heal and be happy for the rest of his life with no heart-shattering breakdowns whatsoever! /s /lh

Hope ur having a great day m8 :]] -curious anon (also i have a new canon fact i wanna share. In quackity's alt lore stream yesterday he said (to the best of my memory) that "no law/juridsiction exists on the dream smp to prevent one from building anywhere" so i guess that clears up the big debate on wheather or not c!dream had a right to enforce rules (or basically the arguement that he owned the server by divine rule)

no i’m - i’m pretty sure that’s just how it works. dream still owns the smp, but he himself has said wayy back at the beginning “everyone can build and go wherever they want” and that was that. it was one of his rules on the smp, it was his main problem with l’manberg. being able to build anywhere were the rules that he “had the right” to enforce. and he did, not because he was a god, but because it was his smp, his home that he claimed for his friends. wouldn’t call it a big debate, it’s really that simple.

.AGONY. HURT EVEN. THIS IS HOW IT IS FOR CURIOUS ANON. I LAUGH, I CRY, I FIND AN ANIMATED GIF ON TWITTER THAT SQUEEZES MY C!TOMMY ENJOYER HEART INTO OBLIVION. (i am being dramatic btw for the funnies just so ya know) I AM NOT GOING TO FINANICALLY RECOVER FROM THIS. AAAAAAAAAAA UEEEEEEE

OK THAT FREAKING

O U C H-

also for the old phil ask. Hes a bad dad because of how he treated ghostbur. I will elaborate if u want

didn’t ghostbur just say “i’m not wilbur” and philza said “you’re not my son” and they went on with their day? weren’t they actually in agreement that he wasn’t the same as wil when he was alive? i don’t remember him really treating him badly tbh other than disowning him which seems fair to me, because ghostbur was a literal stranger to phil at that point?

wish you a nice day, curious anon! (i’ll be back on my essays and answering other asks now, so i might not reply right away :])

[witch-of-ren]

hi!! I saw your post titled "Hades' library" and was wondering if you've read anymore books with him since then? im a huge book reader and a Hades devotee that's trying to get back onto better devotionals for him since ive been struggling, so I thought I'd share that w him :) is the night circus good? id love more recs, im more into fiction books but anything u got I can try!! tysm

Hi! 

I have not read anymore books with him, or even finished Night Circus. I’ve been struggling to really get into books recently and reading has seemed like a chore rather than something fun for me recently. BUT that doesn’t mean that I don’t have a ton of books to recommend. I got carried away, so they’re under the cut. :P

The Night Circus, for one. It’s very good! Erin Morgenstern is one of my favorite authors and that book is beautifully done. It has magic, mystery, romance...pretty much everything you could ask for. Including POC cast (Tsukiko being one of my favorites) and LGBT characters. “The circus arrives without warning. No announcements precede it. It is simply there, when yesterday it was not.”

Next up...The Starless Sea. Another Erin Morgenstern book. I daresay this was better than The Night Circus. Again, POC cast and LGBT. The main romance is LGBT and done very well. Mystery, magic, witchcraft...it’s got a wonderful plot. I read it all in two days, the majority in one sitting and it felt like coming out of a deep sleep when I was done. One of the tattoos I plan to get is going to be related to that book.  “Strange, isn’t it? To love a book. When the words on the pages become so precious that they feel like part of your own history because they are. It’s nice to finally have someone read stories I know so intimately.”

It’s been awhile since I’ve read it, but Even the Darkest Stars (Heather Fawcett) was a good one. It has a sequel now and I keep meaning to read it. Another fantasy one. Magic, witches, demons, adventures. This is similar to the Grishaverse (Shadow and Bone series/Six of Crows) with its setting and some of the magic, but there’s some solid differences. The ending made me mad but I think it sets up the sequel well.  “I wanted to push against the world and feel it push back.”

The Deep by Rivers Solomon is a short novel, perhaps one would call it a novella. It’s POC centered and it has an intense storyline. LGBT if I remember, too. Gorgeous story about mermaids who descended from African people thrown overboard on slave ships as they came to America.  “What does it mean to be born of the dead? What does it mean to begin?”

While we’re talking about mermaids, here’s my plug for the Waterfire Saga (starting with Deep Blue). It’s actually really good and I adored reading it. I think I read through the whole series in one sitting while I was sick once. “One is not born knowing how to lead, one learns.”

These next few are going to be more in the realistic fiction, young adult fiction genre but there’s a reason for each. A piece of what, personally, working with Hades is supposed to mean and what he can represent in a relationship.

My Fairy Godmother is A Drag Queen (David Clawson). It’s a new take on an old fairytale in a modern age, but the message underlying is to be yourself and be that unapologetically. And that money and fame don’t buy happiness. It’s a humorous book and I really need to read it again. “I just felt like . . . me. And whatever “me” meant, that was perfectly fine and absolutely enough. Everyone should feel that kind of peace and self-acceptance far more often than I think most of us do.”

Starfish by Akemi Dawn Bowman (I’d say any of her books besides Infinity Courts, since that’s a different genre, but there’s two I’d like to talk about in particular). This book features POC cast. I believe Kiko, the protag, is half Japanese and half white? The message here is similar to the one above, but it deals more with breaking away from the trauma added on to expectations or an external force. I saw a lot of my relationship with my step-grandmother in this story and I sent a copy to my cousin. We both learned and grew and healed from this story and the lesson taught.  “I want to find self-worth without needing it to come from someone's approval.”

Summer Bird Blue (Akemi Dawn Bowman). This one is a lot heavier, topic wise. And actually, it’s really fitting for me at the moment. The main character loses her sister and has to figure out life without her. She goes through a period where she loses touch with her music, one of the most important things to her. It’s written partly in Pidgin (a mix of English and Hawaiian) so good luck, but it’s a beautiful story of healing and recovering from losing your other half. “Grief is a monster - not everyone gets out alive, and those who do might only survive in pieces. But it's a monster that can be conquered, with time.”

Broken Things (Lauren Oliver) Murder mystery! Uncovering the truth and laying an old friend to rest. But with drama and healing. It’s told really well and the ending caught me so off guard. I usually can’t read murder mysteries because I always guess the ending and am disappointed when I’m right. Couldn’t have guessed this one.  “That’s the thing about hearts. They don’t get put back together, not really. They just get patched. But the damage is still there.”

Finally...They Both Die at The End (Adam Silvera). Coming to terms with the inevitable end of life. This book follows to characters who know they’re going to die. LGBT romance in here as well. It’s a wild ride of a book and well, the title is completely true. There’s dealing with guilt, regret, anxiety, and other feelings that someone on their deathbed would usually have.  “Maybe it's better to have gotten it right and been happy for one day instead of living a lifetime of wrongs.”

I hope that gives you some ideas! Some of these deal with really heavy topics, so please look into that just to be sure so you’re not caught off guard. 

- Ren

[missmorosis]

hi! this is for the valentine’s day event :)

- the fandom i want is atla

- my pronouns are she/her and i don’t care what gender i’m shipped with!

- i’m an infj

- i think my love language is words of affirmation

- i look for a partner that has a good sense of humor and will have open communication with me!

- i have social anxiety so i’m usually really really shy, but i get out of my shell pretty quickly if the person i’m with is very extroverted if that makes sense?? but i’m also not afraid of confrontation and i will speak my mind if i feel it’s needed (sometimes i go a little overboard though, i’m really stubborn, oops). i think i’m kind of smart and would like to think i’m a kind person :)

- for my hobbies, i play guitar and piano and i sing! i also love reading

- three things i do every day: listen to music, read, and play with my dogs

i’m really sorry if this is too much ahhhh

u asked us to talk to u so how r u doing? what did u do today? and also could u recommend a show u really like? i’m looking for a new one and would love some recs!!

also a reminder to please drink water and eat if u haven’t yet today!!

tysm, wishing u a wonderful week :)

^^english is my second language so sorry if there are any mistakes

ENGLISH IS YOUR SECOND LANGUAGE YET YOU WRITE SO PERFECTLY?? IM SO JEALOUS 😭😭

ALSO SZJDJ IM GONNA CRY THANK YOU FOR SOCIALIZING WITH ME AAAAAAHHH!

im just kinda ehh HAHHDJ how about you??

i literally did nothing all day HAHFLSDK- answered my asks and hhnngg that’s pretttyyyyy much it LMAO

OOHH OKAY OKAY IF YOU DONT MIND A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE... TRUE BEAUTY AND HMMM ITAEWON CLASS!! they're both kdramas AND THEY'RE SO GOOD!!

i think you'll go well with...

SOKKA!

he's super extroverted, which would help you get more comfortable!! he's also pretty humorous sooo :)

how he asked you out

-> You were playing one of your favorite songs to yourself on your guitar, singing softly. Trying to switch chords, you groaned when you messed up, creating a dissonant sound. 

“What’s wrong, babe?” Sokka’s head popped into your room, and you waved it off.

“Nothing, I just messed up,” you laughed at his concern. You were glad he cared so much about you, though.

“Would it make you feel better if I asked you to be my valentine?” You rolled your eyes, but nodded nevertheless.

“Yeah, it would make me really happy, Sokka,” you said, somewhat hopeful.

“Alright then... be my valentine?” You laughed, and nodded.

how you spent the day together

-> Sokka had his chin on your shoulder, reading along with the book you had in your hands. You turned the page, and he clicked his tongue.

“Not yet, not yet, I’m not finished.” He turned the page back, and you laughed.

“Fine, you have ten seconds.” He nodded, and read as fast as he could. “One... two... three...”

“Wait wait, I need more time,” he said, and you shook your head.

“Your fault for being a slow reader,” you snickered as he pouted. “Four... five... si-” He kissed you on the lips to shut you up.

“Give me more time, I’m almost done.” You sighed, blushing.

“Alright, since it’s Valentine’s day... I’ll make an exception.” He smiled in approval, pecking you on the cheek in thanks.

ignore how the “how you spent the day together” HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH VALENTINE’S DAY SLKDFJLKFS

[eitelle]

Hey darling! Congrats on you follower count. I am sending this via Submit a post, since the asks have a word limit. I would like to request a Haikyuu boys matchup, if it doesn't trouble you too much. I am a 5'4 girl. I'm a Gemini, I am pretty smart, observing, caring and adptable person. I don't really like grand gestures of affection, but I don't hate them, it depends on my mood. I was made fun for pretty much 50% of my school life, so I am great at comforting someone. I use joking as a coping mechanism, but I come of as salty sometimes.I am also VERY VERY sarcastic. I can go without affection for as long as needed, but I'll also feel neglected after a while, I dunno if that makes sense. I love reading, watching horror movies and playing Sims 4. I could spend hours in a book, without noticing any of my surroundings. But as much as I love being inside, I also adore long walks in the park. I am both a cat and a dog person. I am a pretty happy person, being the youner sister of my firend group. But I also have days when I just need someone to be there for me, cause I cry whenever I feel insecure. Speaking of insecurities, I hate my body. Not only am I short, but I am also pretty chubby. I have big thighs, fluffy arms and belly. I was bullied by my own friends, so my reaction of hiding is only natural. I have three younger brothers, so I know how to handle a hyperactive person. Also my dream is to settle down with a dog and a kitten, 3 or 4 kids maybe. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this. Don't overwork yourself, stay safe, drink a glass of water and eat something. Have a great day!

ok everyone for this ask i made it pretty fluffy but sorta angst to fluff for the imagine. so pls pls pls if u struggle with the topics of hating urself, bullying, or panic attacks and they trigger you, do not read this. thank you :)

hi lovely!! im sorry but u just SCREAM gemini. in the best way possible bc i actually love geminis and im sorry ab what happened during ur time at school but i would like to say that ur body is beautiful, your bodily needs like eating and water are so u dont mf die so go eat and drink some water. ily and please take care of urself :( im ab to beat up those boolies ☺️🔪

ok so i match you up with: matsukawa (mattsun) issei best boy 🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️

alr so some headcanons:

THAT BEST LIKE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE COUPLE OMFG

in response to that the little shit would no joke just call u short stack

he has also tried to call u hot stuff.

it didnt work out

i hc him to give the best bear hugs so when ur crying hes there to give u the biggest hug ever 😩👍

mf is the best hypeman omg like you just breathjng hed be like “BABE WOAH OMG H ALMOST KNOCKED ME ON MY FEET BC OF UR BEAUTY”

u guys are that pinterest couple

yall hype up each others insecurities but u call him caterpillar to tease him ab his brows HELP SJSJSH

hes normally frowning but when hes w u hes always smiling

you actualky get a pep talk from mad dog and hanamaki ab treating him well???

def a lot of pda

for a gift he buys u those books youve been eying (send an ask if u want book recs i have soo many)

i also hc him to like more plus sized people like u and istg this mf will say and i quote “i like my women how i like my marshmallows. sweet, short, fluffy, and cute.” cute,,, but weird

a huge cuddler

youve got ur hands full oml

THIS MANS I- 🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️

ok so imagine:

its been a long day and all you wanted was to go home with your boyfriend, matsukawa issei.

“mattsun-,” you call out as soon as you get home, ur voice breaking as your feelings from the day start to pile up on you. you feel a heavy weight on your chest not even feeling the hot tears streaming down your face. you barely register issei hugging you, you just feel slight body heat and suddenly you cant see anything. this makes u feel suffocated and you realize hes touchibg you. as u shove him away he shifts to wrapping his arm around you while rubbing your shoulder whispering encouragments to let everything out. a while later you calmed down and woke up in your boyfriends arm by the crook of his neck.

“issei?” you ask poking at him to wake him up. as he groggily yawns and looks at you with hooded eyes you quickly scramble off him thinking youve crushed him.

“hey whered u go. im cold now come back here,” he says while pulling you back. as you mutter halfhearted protests and tell him that youre too big, or ur gonna crush him. he simply laughs and tells you hes strong and ur nothing compared to him.

the next morning u wake up to breakfast in bed with your amazing bf telling you everything he loves about you. from your height, to your eyes, to your thighs, your stomach, and even your thighs by lunch everything about last night is gone from your mind.

i hope you liked it even tho its kinda angsty :/

NO ARTBREEDER BUT I FOUND THIS SKSHSHDJDHCUHDJRHRGDHXHFH

now texts ‼️🥰👍

YUH I HOPE YOU LIKED @thatsarcasticgemini :)

[itoldsunset]

thanks soph @yihwas for tagging me! <3 i love your blog and thank youuu so much for the lakorn recs that will keep me occupied this winter break :)

nicknames: dawy [pronounced DAY-wee lol since everyone gets it wrong] is already my nickname! 

height: like 5′5... short enough that sometimes regular pants are too long but not short enough for petite pants to work for me :\

last thing i googled: lmaoo soph as a sociologist who has to read durkheim and giddens for work your answer cracks me up. i think the last thing i searched was “top indie non toxic candle companies” or something like that, going through a serious candle phase right now.

song stuck in my head: no body, no crime by tswift ft. haim. the country cheating murder anthem of my dreams.

amount of sleep: i actually need like 8-10 but lately i’ve been getting like 5-6 because i’m hooked on dramas and have no self-discipline :(

dream job: when it comes to a dream job i’m like oh-aew, but minus a teh in my life who challenges or inspires me to push myself. so i don’t know what my dream job is!! i used to always think i’d like to be a novelist but i have zero creativity. i think i’m ok with any job that’s not miserable, as long as it gives me enough money and time to do all the other things that make me happy (organizing, traveling, etc.).

currently wearing: blue polka-dot pajama pants and a gray sequoia national park sweatshirt.

favorite song: i don’t think there’s such thing as One Favorite Song. but i care 4 u by aaliyah is up there.

favorite instrument: i (very poorly) play the guitar and keyboard. in terms of sound and versatility, nothing beats an acoustic guitar because to me it’s so much more dynamic. but in terms of what i enjoy playing... the keyboard hurts less LOL.

favorite author: i no longer read for fun, but it would have to be samantha irby because she is HILARIOUS. i rarely ever laugh out loud when reading but i do it all the time when i’m reading her books.

favorite animal song: i literally have no idea what this means lol???? the only thing that comes to mind is... baby shark???? this can’t be right. but that’s all i got for you.

random: soph... your prof who talks about how society is a chicken we put on the table, reminds me of my bio teacher who talked about how life was like a soccer ball, except i think my teacher meant it in a touching, wanted-to-guide-us-in-life kind of way but i don’t really know what he meant because i spent my youth playing card games in the back of the classroom.

as for me, i am stressed because i have to write my thesis and study for quals and come up with dissertation ideas and all of this makes me want to sink further into a hole of kdramas and lakorns and not come out for another year or so. sort of like how last year i took a two-week road trip with my friends to national parks with no cell service and i never wanted to come back home, except right now we can’t go anywhere so dramas are all i have.

recent pic: i don’t feel like posting my own photos rn, so here’s the last thing i saved. petition for pp and tor to co-star as siblings in a new series!!!! i’m obsessed.

tagging @teh-ohaew, @shinjaeha, @jaehwany​, and anyone else who wants to do it!!

[nothingeverlost]

The Writing on the Wall (3/?)

Chapter 1 l Chapter 2

in which Meg shows up and Benoit is discussed (I promise he’s actually in the next chapter!)

II

Marta loved college.  She loved the classes, the library, the bio lab.  She loved the ivy that climbed up the wall of her dorm room even if she only spent half of her nights there.  There were nights when she stayed for a poetry reading or an extra seminar, or times when Alice was in a mood and it was easier to focus at her dorm.  Padma was certainly glad of a roommate that was not only quiet but also gone half the time.  She had argued that she might as well commute to Boston U, but her mom had wanted her to have the full college experience.  

What her college life didn’t include was dancing.  Marta wouldn’t have said she missed it at all.  She wouldn’t even have thought about it until five minutes ago.  There was a couple in the middle of the rec hall dancing, advertising for the lessons that were available to anyone that wanted to learn, and Marta couldn’t take her eyes off of them.  Him, in particular.  She’d seen a lot of muscles; one of her textbooks had three chapters on them this semester, but none so perfectly shaped or so well used.

“So do you think he’s gay? I mean from the way he swings his hips you have to really hope he’s not, but you know how those artists and dancers are.  Chances are depressingly high that he has a boyfriend.”  She was so distracted by the dancing that she didn’t hear anyone approach her.  She half expected Alice, but the woman standing next to her was older by a few years and not as familiar.  It took her a moment to realize who she was looking at.  

“Meg?”  She hadn’t seen Meg in almost five years, not since Joni had decided that southern California had a ‘better vibe.’ When she was little it was the one uncomplicated relationship she had with her papa’s family.  They had joked about Marta being an aunt only a year older than her niece.  They had played house and beauty parlor and watched cartoons together. As they had gotten older there had been slumber parties and trips to the mall and for a few years the same sleep away camp. “You’re here?”

“Grandpa called a week ago and said he’d pay for a room for me and mom if we wanted to come on vacation.  Mom hesitated but I convinced her that it was a good idea.”  Meg grinned, but the smile faded and she suddenly looked as young as she had the last time they’d been together.  “I was hoping... I mean I know I’m not very good with calls and stuff and it’s been a long time.  Too long.  But do you think...”

“I missed you, my friend.”  Marta was all too happy to accept a hug.

“Oh thank God.  We totally need to catch up.  After, you know, the dancing.”  Meg’s eyes strayed back to the dance floor and Marta had to admit she was distracted as well.  She’d never seen anyone move like that, or dance that close to someone else.  It wasn’t like the Academy where the nuns used Bibles to measure space between people.  And she’d yet to attend any sort of dance in her three years of college.  Her dating life was pretty nonexistent.

“Yeah, we should watch the dancing first,” she agreed.  From the healthy tan and the way his blonde hair caught the light she was sure the dancer spent time in the sun.  Did he only dance?  She could see him as a lifeguard.  If she was Alice she might even be tempted to fake drowning.

“Really wish there was a chance in hell the guy at the bar would let us have a couple of drinks.  Think they’d believe me if I said I was 21?  I’m getting warm just watching those two; I’ve fucked guys that have touched me less than they’re touching.”  

“Meg!”  Marta tore her eyes away from the dancers; his hand was skimming down her side in a way that was making Marta feel a little warm too.  The woman was leaning into the touch just a little, her eyes half-closed.

“What?  You’ve known guys, haven’t you, who skipped all three bases and went straight for the main event?  They’re usually the same guys you have to fake it for.”  Meg took a sip of water, wrinkling her nose as she looked down at the glass that wasn’t filled with the beverage of choice.  “Or maybe you’re not into guys?  Totally not judging if women are your thing.”

“I like guys.”  She felt her cheeks flush a little at the question.  Not even Alice had asked that, despite her rather dry dating life.  She’d gone to prom with a group of friends and had only been on a couple of dates in high school.  College hadn’t been that much more eventful, though she did go out occasionally.

Meg seemed to lose interest in the dancing, at least for the moment.  She grabbed at Marta’s hand and tugged on it.  “You have been with a guy, haven’t you?”

“I’ve dated.”  She liked the plan about watching the dancing.  It was safer, even if it was making her feel warm.

“Totally not what I asked, and you know it.  Not dating.  Not flashing a guy for mardi gras beads.  I’m talking full-on naked wrestling.  Naked Trojan wrestling, if you catch my drift, because safety is important.”  Marta looked around her.  It wasn’t a conversation she particularly wanted to have, but she certainly didn’t want to have it in a crowded room where anyone might be listening in.  As happy as she was to see Meg, knowing the rest of the family was around was another matter.

“I’ve never dated anyone that made me want to, you know, wrestle.”  Being one of the few non-anglo kids in her private high school as well as the daughter of a famous author had attracted a certain amount of interest, usually from the last type of guys she would be interested in dating.  The longest relationship she’d been in high school had ended because she had refused to go to a hotel with him after a school dance.  The next day her locker had ‘ice princess’ written on it in sharpie.  College was more diverse, but her name was still recognizable.  Too many of the people interested in her seemed curious about her dad’s writing, the movies made from his books, or how big of an allowance she had.

“You don’t have to date them to get the benefits.”  Meg shook her head.  “But it’s totally okay, whatever is right for you.  Let me just tell you from experience that you want someone who touches you like that guy is touching his partner.  Guys only interested in their own dicks aren't worth your time.”  

Marta wasn’t sure if she was embarrassed that Meg was so frank or grateful that she was so interested in really being a friend.  She’d wondered more than once if the move to the other coast was a convenient excuse to end their friendship.  She felt the same confusion when the song ended a moment later and the dancers began to leave. From across the room she could see her papa standing up, clearly ready to go back to their cottage.  She would need to join him in a moment.  “I have to go but I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Breakfast?  Mom and I have a room here in the main lodge.  Are you still an early riser?”

“Yeah.”  She’d always been the first awake in her family.  Mag had been an early morning person too, when they were younger.  Joni had loved to sleep in, and Meg had learned at a young age how to get breakfast for herself.  Weekends she stayed over for sleepovers had been the only time she’d had a hot breakfast.

“Awesome.  I’ll meet you here at eight-thirty and we’ll catch up over coffee, okay?  I have so many things I want to know about how you’ve been.”  Meg was quick to hug her again before looking over to the bar where her mother was holding a drink.  ”I better go too, before mom forgets where she put our room key. See you at breakfast.”

“See you,” Marta agreed as Meg moved out of hearing range.  This summer certainly wasn’t going to be dull.

[blu-eh]

peter parker’s field trip to stark industries fic rec list

someone asked me to do a fic rec for the “peter goes on a field trip to stark industries” and i am happy to oblige because i have read way too many of them and wrote one myself So. anyways these are all COMPLETE. im aiming to get some unique/newer ones in here but yknow

read more as alwayyys

like a bad biography by poisedwalrus

“Wait.” Peter looks up. “What?”

“We’re going to Avengers Compound,” Ned repeats dutifully.

Yeah.

That’s what Peter thought he said.

“Nope.” Peter drops his book onto the table. It shudders. “I’m not going. I’m not— I’m gonna call in sick. I’m gonna call in dead.”

In which Midtown’s Academic Decathlon team inadvertently ends Spider-Man’s whole career.

(Set between “hungry for a poke” and “to win this fight, side by side”)

starting this out with my absolute favorite spiderman series like. oh my god ive read this series several times and it hurts in so many ways but its so funny & well written and i just. ugh. love it. HOWEVER this story is part 8/8 of the series so like....u should read...the entire series first. i literally cannot tell u how good this series is. i have 244 bookmarks on ao3 but only 21 recs and this is still one of my favorites. please!! read it!!! im literally re-reading this series again rn bc im talking about it again

Disaster Field Trip by malynaa

“Please, remain calm,” said FRIDAY. Which was useless, because no one he could see was anything akin to ‘calm’. “The city is under attack from an unidentified threat. According to the law, no one is to leave the safety. Please, stay where you are, the threat is being taken care of. The building is in a lockdown for the time being.”

Right. The new law. In hopes of lowering casualties while the Avengers work, the new Accords included an alarm that immediately alerted all the public spaces, phones and accessible buildings about the threat. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket as the warning blare shot, and with his hearing, he could faintly hear the signal blasting on the streets. Which meant one thing.

Superheroes were needed in the city, pronto.

we! love ! competent peter parker! aka class gets locked down while a threat is happening and, well, peter isnt gonna let that slide despite the numerous protests he receives from his teachers.

The Ultimate Tour Guide by mauvera

Michelle was ready for the day to be over before it began. It was bad enough she had to be on a bus to go to Stark Tower, but now all her classmates were making dumb bets with each other and Peter wasn't even coming with them.

But then she saw just who their tour guide was.

Maybe the day wouldn't be quite as boring as she'd thought.

HOHOHOHHO peter parker is a tour guide in this one AND theres an identity reveal. bc i literally love identity reveals sm. i cannot tell how much i love this

Definitely Worth It by jennylarner

Peter doesn't want to go on a field trip to Stark Tower. It's a recipe for disaster. His class doesn't believe him, his teacher doesn't believe him. If he makes it through the entire day without being suspended, it'll be a miracle. Unfortunately for Peter, he's never much believed in miracles.

...

“This is a goddamn disaster.” Peter declared miserably. At least he hadn’t thrown up his food.

“Could be worse.” MJ said across from him. Peter lifted up his head.

“Oh yeah, how?”

MJ shrugged. “They could have expelled you instead.”

Peter gaped at her. “Thanks MJ, that’s really helpful. I feel so much better now.”

i very much love supportive/good teacher mr harrington but i ALSO love fics when the teachers dont believe peter. this is such a good fic & the author is rlly good about accumulating tension. very typical field trip fic but like. i love those. thats why were here

Of ID Badges and Artificial Intelligence by hblankm

On paper, Peter is, technically, a legitimate Stark Industries intern now. This whole visiting the tower every second weekend or so and actually getting to work with Tony Stark in his personal lab is a great improvement from being mostly-sort-of-ignored by Happy. And it’s not even all Spider-Man stuff! Which, okay, the Spider-Man stuff is definitely the coolest thing to tell Ned about and definitely the most important because it leads to him saving real, human lives - but this thing where Mr Stark seems willing (happy, even?) to just teach him about completely unrelated tech stuff? It makes it feel like Mr Stark isn’t just interested in spending time with Peter because he’s Spider-Man. Like he’s interested in spending time with Peter because he’s Peter. Which is honestly way more unbelievable and way more amazing than any of this superhero stuff.

But anyway, none of that is the point. The point is that Peter’s internship is 100% real.

AKA the standard Midtown goes on a field trip to Stark Industries fic.

very typical field trip fic but idk! i just like it. they do a rlly good job of getting to that low point--aka no one believes peter due to unfortunate circumstances--and then getting back up to the high.

Workplace Mixer by sameuspegasus

Ms Warren takes her class on a field trip to Stark Industries. The class all know that Peter interns at SI, but none of the Stark Industries employees do. Also, the Stark Industries tower in NYC is mostly just admin and everyone wishes they'd got to go on roller coasters like all the other physics classes.

Feat. tropes including Field Trip to Stark Industries, Peter has Weirdly High Clearance, Peter Doesn't Need ID, Peter is a Disaster Magnet, Haven't I Seen You Somewhere Before, Peter Parker's Unexpected Abs and many more.

Third in the Glowy Green Slime series. Contains major spoilers for Green Glowy Slime and Progress Report.

this one is also part of a series!! but it is a very good series so i recommend that as well. ft. competent teachers, realistic field trip, some tension w/ si not knowing peter but its all resolved very well & did i mention its realistic? bc i love that

[hrsloren]

HELLO EVERYONE ! i’m rlly excited to be here at hearsay. actually is a new kind of rp concept for me so if im a little slow in coming up with ideas please be patient w me, i promise i’m engaged and interested. i’d also love recs of your fav murder mystery stuff for inspo! neway some info about ren is under the cut (along w some plot ideas!) and ill message yall once i have a chance to read over the apps so that hopefully i can come 2 u with some thoughts for plots~ ur also welcome to message me first of course or hit that like or really anything else lol!! discord avail on request for plotting, too, if thats more your style. 

kwon loren is a 26 yr old scorpio, horror enthusiast, entrepreneur (cough, drug dealer), n webtoon artist and she’s never met a villain she didn’t want to write a redemption arc for.

yes i almost exclusively chose her name bc it can be nicknamed into ren which obviously sounds like wren and i thought it was punny / suitable lol. 

unfortunately the only one of those that makes any money is the entrepreneurial bit and that is a totally illegal path. so her day job is her night job as the overnight manager of the gs25 near her dingy apartment building.  she works sunday to thursday nights, usually, since she makes the schedule she selfishly schedules the part timers on prime weekend night slots.  she also draws weird commissioned porn for folks w strange kinks (tentacles?? yoikes no judgement but yoikes) when she needs the xtra won.

she was the black sheep of her family even before her personality really showed itself, and once she revealed herself to be a tomboyish, unruly, temperamental, reckless, passionate, and alarmingly contrary child the whole thing just got worse. rlly the only person she was ever very close with was her grandfather, who is a somewhat-renowned murder mystery / horror writer. sneaking peaks at his books and manuscripts was probably what kindled a lot of her weird proclivities as a child, which she carries forward to now.

she’s quite excessive in a lot of ways. too much smoking, too much drinking, too much feeling, too much dreaming, too much scheming, too much writing.... basically the only thing she doesn’t overload on is sleep?? so check out those atrocious under eye shadows sometime bc its a yikes from me yall. 

u can track her moods pretty easily despite the fact that she’s got a hard to read face. once  you get used to her habits and mannerisms its rlly clear to see that she’s an open book. the only thing that can throw it off is that she’ll try to stop smoking abt once every 3 months, at which point she becomes a complete nightmare w very little notice. it usually doesn’t last very long unfort for her lungs.

speaking of smoking shes the kind of person to immerse herself in things easily and get totally wrapped in them. like, she’s v prone to addictions or obsessions. this can be with things, people, television shows, etc. she’s never known a good series she didn’t binge as quickly as possible, a good book she didn’t read cover to cover, sleep be damned. this means she’s often kinda grouchy or trying to sleep something off. she’ll also talk ur ear off about whatever she’s fallen into at the moment. 

just for a weird fact, she has a complex about her hair. its naturally relatively coarse and bushy and curly and frizzy. her mum used to pull it back every morning in a rlly tight ponytail and pin down all the unruly bits with bobby pins or barettes and she hated it, it always made her head hurt and obviously it made her feel like her hair was ugly.  so for a long time she chemically straightened it and did all kinds of treatments, but now she’s trying to maintain it more naturally. so yeah sometimes it looks like a birds nest but at least it’s healthier. 

she’s very picky about her surroundings and organizing her personal space, especially when she wants to work on something. she gets picky about things being in a good visual order, and if she notices something is out of place around her, she’ll hyper focus on it until she can fix it. this can be something meaningful (noticing she didn’t do the dishes) or something absurd (noticing someone left a napkin on the ground at the cafe, across the room, and having to go throw it away before she can focus on anything else). 

just like with her surroundings, with aesthetics, and with substances or media,  she hyper focuses on people too. when she decides someone is ‘hers’ she will go all in on them, becoming loyal to the point of honest to goodness fault. this isn’t to say she’ll tell them they’re the best at all times or be unrealistically enamored with them. she’ll still be fully cognizant of and happy to point out faults, but she won’t turn her back on them. she’d help you bury a body, basically, but she’d tell you what a goddamn psychopath you were as she did. 

FOR SOME PLOT THOUGHTS

her only real established canon relationships have to do w her drug trade or her much better cousin (just ask anyone in her family) so she’s very well open to just about anything. she’s canonically close to magpie and cousins w swallow, of course, and sells to an established handful. i’d love to get her a bit wrapped up in things these days, maybe some secret trading or ferreting things out. i imagine she feels loyalty to magpie and resents those who might come out with accusations against him. 

i’d love her to have an outcast ride or die best friend from high  school, someone who was also on the black sheep side of things. she did participate in the high school literary magazine (layout) and on the newspaper (though not as seriously as one might have hoped) and certain undesirables spread rumors about the english teacher “favoring” her (at least some guiding figure finally liked her dammit). so bullies from high school are fully possible. she was kind of a weirdo (duh) so i imagine it would have been pretty normal to pick at her here and there, though she did try to fly under the radar a lot. people who used to harass her coming to her for pills now could be a thing to explore, or someone who dated her in high school but didn’t really want to be “out” about it due to you know like dumb high school social differences so resentment grew and it was a whole teen movie drama that ended up without the happy ending and now its weird when they see each other, which could go many ways. those she’s befriended or so forth since coming back to town down on her luck, also, would be welcome! 

anyway if you made it to the end of this ily very much and i hope we can plot asap huhu

[creatingnikki]

Dearest Atlas,

That is a really fun choice for a pseudonym. Perhaps, your actual name? Unlikely but for the sake of this letter and me you’re Atlas irrespective. So, hello! You’re almost a decade younger to me and I must admit, I’m a little nervous to write you this love letter. I’ve never had an issue writing or interacting with people older to me by 3-4 decades even. But talking to someone younger always takes me back to when I was their age and how much I hated older people acting as though they knew better.

Of course, now after growing up I have realized that it’s just natural for you to know more and learn more as you live more (exceptions exist always and there’s not an equal increase in age and knowledge/wisdom, as we all know). I mean, compared to a 5 year old, you know so much more. But I think the one place where most adults go wrong is that instead of looking after those younger to them, they either patronize them or exploit them. Shouldn’t we, by default look after those younger to us? Protect them, so that they don’t lose their innocence and heart due to this shit world as early as we did? This sentiment is why I love a classic that most people don’t – The Catcher in the Rye by J.D Salinger. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it. I will warn you that the narrator is annoying but his heart is in the right place and that’s the most important thing.

I guess since I’ve already started writing this letter my nervousness is out the window. Do forgive me if at any place I come across as preachy or pretentious. Know that isn’t one bit intentional.

You know how I know I’m no longer a teenager? Because I just spent 10 minutes looking up what LB(BT) means. I still don’t know but as per Google this is what it could mean:

Let’s be bored together (doesn’t fit the context as you said ‘I’m LB(BT)’)

Something related to LGBTQ+ (Is it?)

Lembaga Bela Banua Talino (Which is an Institute for Community Legal Resources Empowerment – umm probably not?)

When older people would be so clueless with slangs like LOL and TTYL and BRB 10 years ago I would think, ‘Are they serious? What’s not to get in that?’ But this is a WTF moment for me because I have crossed over to the other side, clearly. Anyway, now I’m quite curious so do let me know, please! Haha

Though, I do have a really embarrassing and silly story related to internet slang and ‘brb’. So this was back in 8th grade – 2010 – when I had just joined Facebook and had started to talk to this senior in school who I soon developed a crush on. Now, you need to know 2 things for context:

Back then everyone in school would type in “chat language” which was very “cool”. For instance, ‘What is up with you?’ would be typed as ‘wht is up wth u?’

This guy would use terms of endearment for me like sweetheart, darling, etc. *pukes*

So, for a whole week when we would chat, and he would use ‘brb’ during our conversation I had no idea what it was but I just assumed it was another term of endearment. Oh my god. Shall I even say it? Okay…so I thought it was….barbie. YES WHY WOULD HE CALL ME THAT. It’s bloody weird but my 14 year old brain worked in weird ways, and yes you’re a whole lot smarter than I was at 14, and I just assumed that. Why I continued talking to a guy who I thought called me ‘barbie’, I do not know. From entering the world of social media at 14 and not knowing slangs like the back of my hand to reaching here – writing a letter to a 14 year old and not knowing another slang’s full form – a I believe I have reached a full circle. Thank you? I think it’s very humbling but also grounding to realise how old you are or just how much time has passed by. Adulting is quite disorienting and moments like these are needed.

And thankfully, I know what you mean when you say you’re Wiccan. And I think that’s pretty cool! Around when I was 16 I read a Jodi Piccoult book about teen Wiccans and I was so fascinated that post that I did 3 things:

Convinced my friend to become Wiccan with me

Installed an app for spells

Convinced my mom to let me get a tattoo with a sentence from the Wiccan Rede

My friend ditched me, the spells on that app needed things that weren’t accessible to me and I was too much of a chicken to actually get inked (still don’t have a single tattoo!) and none of those things ever really materialised.  In yet another way you’re so much smarter than I was back then. I keep saying this not to be weird but to admire you and just express how in awe I am by certain things you mentioned.

Shall I just paste the Wiccan Rede here for everyone to see how beautiful and solid it is? Or perhaps the end of it that hit me the most?

“With a fool no season spend or be counted as his friend.

Merry Meet and Merry Part bright the cheeks and warm the heart.

Mind the Three-fold Laws you should three times bad and three times good.

When misfortune is enow wear the star upon your brow.

Be true in love this you must do unless your love is false to you.

These Eight words the Rede fulfill:

“An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will”

And the sentence I wanted to get a tattoo of? Any guesses?

Well – An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will.

While I didn’t get it, I do want to talk about it.

People will always tell you what to do and what to be and what to think and how to behave and what to not wear and what to see and what to not talk about. These people will be your friends, parents, teachers, siblings, relatives, strangers, lovers, the government, employers, enemies and bullies. A lot of them will be well-intentioned and that’s where it will get tricky. But you should always do what feels right to you. No matter who says what. Stand up for what you believe in no matter who or how many people are against it. That’s from the book To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee and another book that I highly recommend.

As you grow older, the lines between good and bad, black and white, brave and weak will quickly and confusingly blur. You’ll have to make a million choices, a lot of which won’t matter in a few years while some will stay with you for the rest of your life. And sometimes it will feel like you’re in a maze and thick fog (all the confusion between what’s right and what’s wrong) is surrounding you and there is this loud, piercing noise (other people’s voices) that won’t stop until you find your way out that maze. What’s waiting for you outside? Some people think it’s success, money, love, or even death. It really depends on how you see things and what’s the most important to you.

To me? I think what’s waiting out there for me is peace and truth. Lately, I’ve been able to find my way out but it’s only seconds until I’m dragged back inside. So, how to figure a permanent way out this maze is my journey next. I don’t know anything. No one knows anything. But yet people insist on pretending to know. And sometimes that’s important too (like at work). But I hope when you’re on your journey of figuring things out for yourself, you do what feels right to you and only remember – An ye harm none do what ye will.

A picnic with your friend family where everything was so happy sounds like such a precious and beautiful memory. I’m glad you got to experience that and I can only hope that while you navigate your way through the maze, you find such absolutely lovely and blissful moments in plenty. And as for your ex who sent you anon hate – so glad that such an ass is out of your life. As someone who has received a lot of nasty anon hate on tumblr, I know it hurts the most when you suspect (more like just know it) that it’s someone who used to be close to you. I guess that’s the other stuff hiding in the maze – bitterness and pain. But I think as long as you have a few people who have the best interests for you at heart who hold your hand and figure the way out together, you’re going to be okay.

So, Atlas, I do think this turned out to be a tad bit didactic but know that’s only because the part inside of me that’s still 14 is cheering on for you and sending you much love.

xoxo

Nikki

PS I know I’ve given you 2 book recs already but here’s a third one cos I think you’d quite like it – Undead Girl Gang by Lily Anderson. It’s a book about two high school best friends who are Wiccans and one of them kills herself and the other uses a spell to bring her back to live temporarily to figure out what really happened.

Guys, February is 29 days of love letters. I’m writing love letters, as part of The Love Project, and if you’d like me to write one to you, drop me an email at creating.nikki@gmail.com

There are 10 more spots left, and you can still be a part of it if you’d like :D

I wrote this letter for Atlas based on some questions they answered. You can read their answers here.