Peter: Hey Tony, what are you doing for Peppers birthday?
Harley: are you at least cooking it?
Tony: I quite like the tower not in flames thanks
Peter: So you did nothing?
Tony: I got her a card too. Here, look
Harley: *reading aloud* Roses are red, violets are blue
Peter: *reading aloud* whiskey costs less than dinner for two
Tony: *holding up a bottle of whiskey* I also got this
Peter: Pepper is gonna be so mad
Harley: Friday, save all recordings of Tony and Pepper interacting for the rest of the week
Y/n: *walks downstairs*
Steve: Hey Y/n! How was prom?
Y/n: It was awesome, dad! Stacey and I stayed after to clean up and I got to meet next years trig teacher!
Tony: That’s not the prom I remember.
Harley: I have such a bad headache
Tony: That’s the prom I remember
Bucky: Steve, we raised a good kid
Y/n: You two didn’t raise me, HYDRA did. Everyone knows that
Tony: what is going on here?
Morgan: *dressed in a red frilly gown* we’re playing princesses! Peter is taking his carriage very slowly by his rivals home, so that he can see his latest hat.
Peter: *driving a toy car, wearing a sequined ￼blue dress with a matching blue hat* Eat you’re heart out Harley, you toad-eating hag.
Harley: *sipping tea from a plastic tea cup, dressed in an abysmal￼ yellow gown* Peter, you must surely be aware that I am unable to view the roads from my castle due to the vastness of my estate.
Peter: oh, please do forgive my mistake, Harley, I had only assumed you could see from that ostentatiously high pedestal atop of which you have placed yourself.
Morgan: Ohhhhh! The girls are fighting!!!!!
what in the house of sanity is happening.
1) Tony is not responsible for Wanda. She's an adult and she is responsible for HER SELF. Stop treating her like she's a baby who needs someone to cuddle her. But if we want to take a look on how he treated her sure... let's do it.
She didn't faced any consequences after Ultron. Who do you think made sure she wasn't arrested and imprisoned for the rest of her life? Pietro's Ghost? Tony took care of every avenger's reputation and payed for everyone. He let her stay in the compound AND when she was accused and people wanted to incriminate her he wanted her to stay safe in her house. Not a room with only a bed, a whole building with the man he loved. Just to protect her from hate.
But yeah, he's an horrible person.
2) HE WAS ABUSIVE TOWARDS PETER?
idk if I should laugh or not at this... he literally made Peter's life safer because if he never met him Peter would still wearing that unsafe pajama fighting the crime. Or maybe not, he would directly be dead.
If we want to blame tony for bringing a child during a fight, then we are all dumb. THAT-WAS-NEVER-MEANT-TO-BE-A-FIGHT.
Peter just had to web Team Cap to make sure they didn't escape (AND THEN BECOMING CRIMINALS Y'ALL, TONY WAS SAVING THEM), it's not tony's fault if Steve didn't changed his mind. Was it kinda irresponsible? yes. He is a bad model because he brought a kid to Germania? no. Peter was already a superhero, Tony didn't make him one. And Peter was excited to be there, so I don't really know what's y'all problem.
In homecoming was he distant? yes, but because he needed time to heal. at the same time, he was always looking after Peter and always helped him when he needed it the most. He just wanted Peter to be safe and to be just a friendly spiderman. Y'all wanted Peter to be like Raimi!Peter but when Tony also wanted that, you get angry. Ok.
I won't speak about infinity war and endgame because all he did during that movies was to care about Peter, protect him and save him from death. But yes, sure, he's abusive.
Have we watched the movies or...
Let me start with saying Harley didn't need Tony like Peter needed him. Harley had a mother and a sister, what should have Tony done? Staying with him and leaving everything behind? let me remind you that he HAD to leave him, or, y'know, not a big deal, Aldrich would have won. Also, we're all forgetting how Tony payed for Harley's house and his little sister's watch. Yeah he didn't care about him either.
Second thing. Did you watch endgame funeral? Harley was invited. Pepper would never invite a kid tony met ten years earlier. they must stayed in contact during the time. But no, let's say he's a bad model because he didn't adopted a kid who he just met and who already had a mother and a sister.
Was the comment about being a pus*y kinda cruel? Yes. But it's a joke. J-O-K-E. And it doesn't look like Harley was crying because of this. Just because he made some jokes, he gets hate. Okay.
4) This one is the worst.
Y'know, I can almost see why you can say the first three things. Almost. Because you only saw what's bad about their relationships, okay.
But on this one I don't really understand.
Every interaction they had was showing how much tony cared for the kid. You're saying pepper had to take care of her, but we didn't even see a scene of them before the funeral. Tony was a Caring and lovely father, not like his own father. Morgan loved her dad, she didn't act like a kid around an absent father and I myself have an absent father since I was born and I never acted like that with him. He treated her like a princess, and he was ready to not help everyone because he didn't want to risk his daughter's life.
Are we watching the same movies or
Peter: And she even gave us the same book!
Harley: When she gave it to you, did she say-
Peter and Harley: It's one of a kind, just like you? *groans*
Peter: At least she wrote Peter in mine and Harley in yours
Harley: Yeah, wait. Mine says to Harry!
Ned: Maybe she's dating a third guy named Harry
*Everyone stares at Ned*
Ned: Too soon?
Y/n: Now that we know Liz is a stinking cheater, let's talk about revenge, once again, I offer the butter sock and knife
Sometimes Family is just a genuis billionaire, his hot ex-neurosurgeon turned sorcerer husband, a kid with spider powers, the ceo of your company who is dating your spouse's ex, your spouse's ex, your superhero best friend and a random kid you met in tennessee one time who helped you fight baddies. And I think that's fine.
peter parker deserves to have a boyfriend. idc which version of him, or if it's harley keener, harry osborn, johnny storm, wade wilson, the male!mj andrew garfield was talking about or anyone. just get him a boyfriend.
Tony: Peter, have you ever heard of the trolley problem?
Peter: I mean it’s not much of a problem anymore.
Tony: What do you mean?
Peter: I can just stop the trolley with my bare hands.
Tony: Ok, well, for the sake of the question, pretend that you can’t.
Peter: But I can. Why wouldn’t I factor in what I’m physically capable of?
Tony: Sure but we’re talking hypothetically-
Harley: Hypothetically I’d step in front of it because I can’t handle the pressure of decision making.
Tony: Harely no-
Peter: Don’t worry, Mr. Stark. I’d stop the trolley with my strength before he could do that.
Tony: Why did I even ask…