#harry styles interview concept

[harrysfolklore]

Harry Styles Answers the Web's Most Searched Questions | WIRED

this was posted on my patreon a few months ago, enjoy ! MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

"Hi I'm Harry Styles and this is the Wired Autocomplete Interview."

Harry introduced himself to the camera and you smiled, you were currently at WIRED Studios for Harry's long awaited autocomplete interview that he finally agreed to do thanks to yours and his fans persistence.

You were sitting behind the camera with the rest of the crew, watching him with a small smile.

A crew member passed the first board to him, he looked at it confusedly for a minute before speaking.

"Okay so. I'm answering what I think or what?"

Everyone in the studio laughed and the director quickly explained to him how the game worked once again, you rolled your eyes with affection and he sent a wink your way.

"Alright, how is Harry Styles?" he said after taking the little piece of paper off the board, "I'm good, I'm really enjoying being home in London, I was away for a while on tour and I'm going to stay here for a bit so that's exciting."

"How did Harry Styles," he paused to rip the next paper and reveal the rest of the question, "Become famous? Well, when I was sixteen years old I auditioned for a singing show called The X Factor, I got put in a band with four lads and we didn't win but we put out a song called What Makes You Beautiful," he smiled for a second, "that one put us on the map, we released a bunch of albums and now I'm here."

"How did Harry Styles meet his wife?" at this, he turned his gaze to you to give you a big smile, you immediately mirrored his and nodded your head, signaling that you were okay with him talking about it.

"We could say that it was basically a blind date, we had a friend in common who thought we would be a good match and set us up, we had an amazing first date but then I had to travel to Los Angeles for work so we couldn't really see each other after that but once I was back in London we hung out all the time, and now we're married."

He smiled at you again and you couldn't help but feel your heart melt, you had been married for 6 months now but the married life was still new for the both of you, and everything he called you his wife butterflies made its way to your stomach.

"How is Harry Styles still alive?" his eyes widened in surprise and he looked around the room, making a few present laugh, "Um, that's a weird thing to search on the internet, but I guess, I don't know if I can answer that, I don't think anyone can answer that we're just lucky to still be around and enjoy life."

He gave the camera one of his infamous "frog smiles" and handed the board to a crew member who was ready with the next one.

"Does Harry Styles have tattoos?" he revealed the first question of the new board, "Yes, he does. I have a lot of tattoos actually, they're basically all over my body. The most recent one is right here," he pointed at the back of his right arm, "It's my wedding date, actually, everyone might call me a sap but I was reserving this arm for tattoos about my wife a and future kids, so I guess it's finally time to fill it."

It was safe to say that  fans watching at home and everyone in the studio absolutely melted, especially you.

"Does Harry Styles have siblings? I do I have a sister, she's older than me and her name is Gemma. A lot of people claim she's cooler than me for some reason but I don't thing that's true," he shrugged and revealed the next question, "Does Harry Styles speak Italian? I would like to think that I do, I spend a lot of time there and I've learned how to communicate pretty decently."

"Is Harry Styles an actor?" he said after peeling the first sticker of the new board, "He tries to be an actor that's for sure," he laughed and everyone in the room did as well, "I mean, I've been in a couple of movies, I've auditioned for a bunch of roles and my agent has sent me scripts to go through," he shrugged "So I can say that makes me an actor."

"Is Harry Styles american?" he shook his head at that one, "He is not! He's Britain, born and raised okay? He's very proud of it."

"What's Harry Styles BeReal? I don't have a BeReal, but if I did I wouldn't tell you," he pointed to the camera jokingly, "What are Harry Styles fans called? I think they are referred to as Harries, but I don't like to speak on behalf of them, you should ask them."

"What was Harry Styles first song? My first song was Sign Of The Times, I wrote it with friends that I love, and that is my wife's favorite song I've ever written, right love?"

"That's correct." you said from your spot, pretty audible so you know it would make it to the final cut of the interview.

"What are Harry Styles songs about?" he peeled the last sticker of the board, "They're about a lot of things, life, friends, love, my wife," he shrugged, "I even have one about the female orgasm."

You quietly giggled, knowing that his fans would go crazy over that last sentence.

"Did Harry Styles go to college? He did not, he became a singer."

"Did Harry Styles win a Grammy? He somehow won Album Of The Year last year, which is absolutely insane if you ask him."

"Did Harry Styles finish high school? Oh I'm glad the internet asks," he laughed, "Contrary to popular belief I did finish high school, I completed my GCES and I graduated, I don't know why there's a rumor there that I didn't finish high school tho."

"Anyway, last one!" he comically threw the board to the floor and grabbed the final board a crew member was handling him, "Who is Harry Styles best friend? Um, I have a ton of best friends. Jeff who's also my manager, Mitch who plays in my band, my childhood best friend's name is Johnny, so yeah, I'm very lucky in the friends department, I love my friends."

"Who does Harry Styles look like? My mom, I would say. A lot of people point out that we have the same smile," he shrugged, "My mom is a beautiful woman so I'm flattered."

"Who did Harry Styles write Love Of My Life about? My wife and London."

"And final question," he slowly peeled off the sticker for dramatic effect, "Who does Harry Styles love? Okay, that's cute that people search for that on the internet, um, I love my family and friends, I love my wife that's for sure, I love making music and performing," he listed with his fingers, "And love love, yeah, love is great."

He smiled to the camera and put the board aside to say his goodbyes.

"I thought my Google searches were much more appropriate that I expected. I was fun to see what people wonder about me, so yeah thank you WIRED for having me."

[morganbritton132]

thinking of eddie one day on live saying he doesn’t get why the internet calls him a wifeguy, him being defensive saying he talks about steve a normal amount people just over exaggerate it cause they’re gay

someone then proceeds to link him a 40 minute long youtube compilation thats part 4 in a ongoing series of eddie always finding the strangest ways to bring steve up in interviews, constantly derailing conversations without realizing, just being absolutely disgustingly in love etc etc. the video also includes the interviewers’ confusion as they try to comprehend what on earth steve has anything to do with what they just asked + the series has a counter of how many times eddie is recorded saying “my husband” that is currently well past the 200’s

eddie ends the live in embarrassment

I think Eddie would be offended the first time someone called him a wifeguy.

Someone in the chat say that Eddie is such a wifeguy and Eddie is just like, “Ummm, no? I’m not a ‘wifeguy’ because I’m gay. I’m married to a man. A wife does not enter the equation. I’m a husband-guy. A husband-husband, if you will.”

Eddie goes to find Steve and tells him, “Someone on the internet called you my wife.”

Steve, who is just trying to eat his lunch in peace: Oh-kay?

Eddie to the camera: He’s offended. Look at him.

People in the comments explain to him that a wifeguy is just a guy who loves his spouse and talks about them all the time. The term is a bit heteronormative, but the concept is just guy that loves his spouse, like Eddie. And Eddie is cool with that until someone else comments about how a lot of wifeguys have recently cheated or left their wives and they don’t want Eddie and Steve to break up.

Eddie responds to that and says, “Yeah…I don’t want – I don’t want that. I don’t want to be grouped with the YouTube guy that cheated on his wife at a Harry Styles concert. And I don’t talk about Steve all the time. I just tell you guys funny little stories and he happens to be there.”

Commence everybody linking Eddie in YouTube compilations of him talking about Steve, dating all the way back to Corroded Coffins’ first interview where he’s purposely not gendering his partner while he talks about how they were the inspiration of their current single.

I don’t think Eddie would be embarrassed because I think he just owns everything about himself, but I do think that he would go and find Steve again and film him showing Steve part 4 of the YouTube series Eddie Munson Loving His Husband.

Steve, who is still just trying to eat lunch, is like, “Ed, this forty minutes.”

Eddie: Shh, look how much I love you. Look how much I express my love for you. I’m giving you a – digital copy of my love. It’s – it’s a gift from me to you.

Steve: …Did you forget my birthday?

Eddie: It’s your birthday?!

End of stream.

<- Last Post | Next Post ->

[mydearesthrry]

mydearesthrry masterlist ❥

hi bffs!! im jules and welcome to my masterlist <3 i write for harry styles and tasm/mcu peter parker and range from different aus! my requests and asks are always open unless stated otherwise, so feel free to send in anything here!

if you do choose to request something please do keep in mind the normal restrictions, and if u want something specific feel free to specify! (even the tiniest details if u want to see ur fic written w the utmost accuracy teehee) all my work has been written from july 23’-present!! {tags holy grail, s. reid <3, h nsfw, h fic rec, and peter <3 are fic recs}

**i do not condone any reposting of my work!!** if any links r broken shoot me a message or an ask and ill fix it asap!!

please enjoy my work, i love u and thank u thank u thank u sm for supporting me <3

—————

❥ - denotes fluff

✮ - denotes angst

✿ - denotes smut

✧ - reader favorites (over 600+ notes)

—————

harry styles <3

— oneshots —

trinkets on tour ❥✧

↬ in which you collect things from all of the tour stops, and harry loves you. (1.3k words)

harry’s house home ❥✮✧

↬ you miss harry, and he misses you even more. (2.1k) [1k+ notes]

obvious ❥✧

↬ when harry just can’t understand what you’re talking about, and he’s also your husband? (1.1k)

behind the scenes: daylight ❥

↬ a first date, a circus, and a horse named honey. (2.2k)

a compilation of ynrry on stage ❥

↬ y/n and harry are both in the band one direction, and although they aren’t allowed to publicize their relationship, their love shines through on stage in the tiniest moments. (1.2k)

sweet nothing ❥✧

↬ a very sleepy harry in an ice bath. (1.6k) [1k+, personal fave!]

love in secret ❥✧

↬ 5 times when y/n and harry just understood each other. (5.9k, check cw!) [1.5k+, author and reader favorite!!!]

a mutual understanding ✿

↬ y/n just cant stand harry, and he loves a chase. (2.6k, check warnings!)

hayday, braids, and chocolate ❥✧

↬ a lazy sunday at home with harry. (1.1k)

right back home to you ❥✮

↬ y/n trying to be cool about it (and failing)! (4.8k, check warnings)

— blurbs (<900) —

spill or fill your guts ❥✧

cloud watching ❥

sweetener (the zane lowe interview) part 1 ❥

the end ❥✧

forever ❥✧

honeyed bliss ❥✧

debriefing ❥✧

dynamic ❥

baby ❥✧

book (lovers)

— concepts —

new!gf Y/N seeing the ‘olivia’ tat for the first time <900

new!gf Y/N getting jealous at a party with fbh >1k

body shots with fbh <900

universes (h.s.)

honeyed moments

☀︎︎ a collection of home videos and moments of the styles family. [husbandrry, dadrry]

. . . .

[lcandothisallday]

jack harlow masterlist!✨

Blurbs/Concepts

Pranking him with a pretend BJ

Reaction to someone sliding into your DM

Tension turned more

Movie night 1

Goofing around on live

Freezing hands

First date nerves

Jack playing Santa

Playing with his PG ring 2

Making fun of his Rudolph claymation crush

Tattling on Jack

Friends to Lovers 2

Stay the Night

Communication

Jack jealous of Urban and Clay

Jack asks his mom how to know if you’re in love

Late night FaceTime

Silly Childhood Crush - y/n has the opportunity to work with Harry Styles

Aftercare

More like you - in which your daughter starts to look more and more like Jack as she grows

Jack accusing you of losing his PG ring

Naming your baby after Urban

Argument with Jack in front of his friends

Jack’s birthday

Play fighting with Jack

Jack spotting you in the crowd of his show

Princess- your older daughter is jealous of her newborn sister

Rough Nights - Pent up frustrations leads to the boys breaking down in your arms

Jack FaceTiming you late a night after having a bad day

Fics

Hesitant - where Jack asks you to move in

Perfect - late night drives

Funny Seeing you Here part 1

Different Light part 1 part 2

Storm into my heart

I’m Yours

Instagram Live part 2 part 3

Full time Home - Jack buys a house without consulting with you first

Unfair - reader hires Urban for a project (some f!reader x urban)

Glancing your Way - you and Jack keep making eye contact at a party

Red Carpet Lovers part 2 - going to the met gala with Jack

Highschool Sweethearts - Jack discusses on an interview how you and him met

Dancing Queen - Giving Jack head after his Grammys performance

Birthday Girl - It’s your birthday and Jack claims he isn’t able to make it but he actually has a few tricks up his sleeves

Fireworks - Joining Jack in Kentucky to watch the fireworks

Right Person Wrong Time part 2 - Jack has a history with Urban’s younger sister

Lil Secret - where a couple photos of you and Jack surface and he gets asked about it in an interview

Advice - Jack’s mom gives him advice

Moving On - You break up with Jack

Drunk in Love - Joking around on a yacht with Jack

Not that Simple part 1 part 2

Someone Better - Jack is in love with you and he has to see you with another guy

One Bed - Enemies to lovers have to share a bed

Cute when you’re Jealous - Reader is jealous

Hurt - Jack wants to keep your relationship secret

Pretty Views - Reader admires Jack while he reminisces on his accomplishements. Lead up to sexy times

Promises - Reader and Jack used to date and his mom tries to get you two back together

Court Side Butterflies

Wedding Season - where Jack is convinced to bring the reader (the girl he hates) as his plus one to a wedding

Ice Skating Date

jeremy wmcj✨

Blurbs

Couple's Yoga

Post ACL Surgery Confessions

Jeremy sees you at a pickup game and shows off to flirt

Jealous Jeremy

Juice

Fool for you

Silent Treatment

[pancakes4two]

surprise surprise… here’s a part 2 for private!y/n 🫶🫶🫶🫶 thank you for all the love on the first blurb and for leaving so many sweet comments!

PREVIOUS PART | NEXT PART | MASTERLIST | SEND ME A REQUEST

harryleaked

8,828 likes

harryleaked leaked photos from harry’s rumored girlfriend’s instagram.

posted yesterday with the caption: “mother, father & son”

View all 1,355 comments

harryfan1 you shouldn’t be spreading this around. delete it please before more people see

harryfan wait what happened

harryfan1 she accidentally accepted someone’s follow request. they’re spreading all the pics from her instagram on twitter now.

harryfan oh wow

harryfan4 yeah they’re def dating it’s over for us

harryfan3 DELETE

harryfan2 guys stop engaging with the post it’s only going to gain more traction if you do. dm the account if you want them to stop don’t like or comment

harryleaked

9,977 likes

harryleaked more photos from harry’s rumored girlfriend’s instagram.

posted this july with the caption: “the wait was worth it for this v v v belated valentine’s day date”

harry also commented: “Better late than never?”

View all 3,567 comments

harryfan1 wtf she has the prettiest smile

harryfan5 so it’s confirmed confirmed

harryfan6 this july… he had a show in paris… he took her on a date in the city of love…

harryfan7 UR SO RIGHT WTF WHAT A HOPELESS ROMANTIC

harryfan guys seriously stop bringing attention to it. i know this is a shock to everyone but we’re helping nobody by talking about it so publicly. especially since harry and her clearly don’t want their relationship to be public right now

rollingstone

156,739 likes

rollingstone What is it like navigating relationships as the most wanted man in the world?

Harry Styles speaks to Rolling Stone about love and privacy, two concepts that are frequently in contention for someone who has reached the level of stardom that he has.

“It can feel a little voyeuristic, at times. I think obviously at the end of the day, all anyone wants to do is to be able to love freely and openly. That’s harder to achieve when you’re under the scrutiny of the entire world. So, I like to keep parts of my relationship to myself. We basically built a wall of privacy that we could safely love each other behind. And while that isn’t ideal, it’s what works for us. Obviously, I think it goes without saying that it’s disheartening when people try to peel back the layers we’ve carefully constructed to protect our relationship.” He says, hinting at private photos that leaked online recently, which forced him to go public with girlfriend Y/N L/N.

Visit the link in our bio to read the full interview.

View all 20,473 comments

harryfan1 DAMN y’all need to apologize to him right now bc he’s neverrrrr called us out this openly before and we’ve done a lot of out of pocket shit historically. he’s MAD mad

harryfan why do i feel like i just got put in time out

harryfan3 EVERYONE SAY SORRY HARRY

harryfan2 like what did i say? harries can never just be serious and look what happened because of it

harrystan y’all don’t know common courtesy and got yelled at because of it LOL

harryfan9 another day of harries ruining everything

harryfan8 anyways… he looks so good in this pic

yournewinstagram

Liked by harrysnewfinsta, yourbff and 10 others

yournewinstagram ok girls let’s try this again 🫵🏻❤️‍🔥🎀⚡️🌈

View all 5 comments

yourbff BACK & MORE PRIVATE THAN EVER

yournewinstagram that’s the first and last time you’ll see me on enews

harrysnewfinsta Hey can you see my comment? Is this working?

yournewinstagram yes harry it’s working.

harrysnewfinsta Ha! Tech whiz Styles

[lovecanyon]

ZANE LOWE INTERVIEW

dad!harry x reader

MASTERLIST

-

"Well I actually wrote Boyfriends about Y/N. Ironically she was in a relationship when we first met." Harry tells Zane who lets out a small chuckle.

"Oh god."

"Yeah I know. It’s something me and her always laugh about. I would be in the corner watching Y/N and this guy, who I didn't like by the way, laugh and smile together." Harry scoffs playfully at the memory that was imprinted in his brain.

"Harry Styles jealous? I can't believe that." Zane gasps jokingly making Harry laugh. "So does the guy know you don't like him? Because if not and he hears Boyfriends...."

"Oh yeah, he knows I don't like him. It was painfully obvious." Harry reveals.

"Basically the inspiration was shitty boyfriends?" Zane questions the musican who nods. "And how does Y/N feel about the song. I have a strong feeling she loves it." He lets out a grin wanting to know more.

Truly Y/N did love the song. When Harry played the full album to her she shed a few tears and let out a couple of laughs. It really meant a lot to her that he would dedicate another album to her. Even still, she had an emotional attachment to Fine Line and all the songs on it.

"Y/N does love it! She was the one that begged me to play it at Coachella and I couldn’t resist." Harry grins, beginning to fawn over his fiancé.

"She was the one?!"

"Yes! I wasn’t going to play any of the new songs—well not until she told me too." The singer beams.

"All your fans better go thank Y/N." Zane chuckles making Harry laugh along with him. Most fans loved Y/N but there were always a few people sending her hate which Harry despised.

"Without her I wouldn’t have Fine Line or Harry’s House. Being around her just gets me inspired to write a lot." Harry praises Y/N with a smile on his face.

-

"So you would say your life drastically changed after having children?"

"Well, I would say yes. Truly I changed for the better. It was something I worried about you know—if i have children then does that mean I have to quit music—you know stuff like that. But Y/N always reassured me to do what I wanted to do. And if she was fine with me doing what I wanted to do then I would do every single thing to protect her and our children." Harry reveals making Zane nod understandingly.

"Y/N is super supportive of you, I love it." Zane tells Harry.

"She is super supportive and very understanding. I love her so much." Harry says letting a large grin form on his face.

"I can tell. Every time we talk about her, you get all jittery and red in the face!"

"Oh god." Harry laughs hiding his face in his hands. Zane let out a few awes which makes Harry’s cheeks turn even more red.

It was cute the way Harry immediately started to blush after talking about Y/N. All throughout Harry’s life Y/N was the only relationship he could talk about freely, without feeling uncomfortable.

Being with her was truly Harry’s dream.

-

"I know Inez isn’t old enough to be aware of your life yet, but does Beau know what you do and who you are?" Zane asks Harry who perks up at the question.

"Beau sort of understands. Being only four, he still is confused about it all. He knows he doesn’t live a life like any other four year old, you know." Harry explains which Zane nods along to. "He will see all these children playing freely on the playground then there’s him getting photographed by all these people."

"That must make you feel some type of way right? People not knowing their boundaries." Zane pondered.

"I would say it makes me feel…uneasy. Just the thought of me not being there when something happens scares the living shit out of me." Harry furrows his brows not liking the concept that came out of his mouth.

The thought of Beau, Inez or Y/N getting hurt by fans or paparazzi made Harry sick.

"It’s understandable to feel that way. You being Harry Styles and having children will create a little bit of commotion in the world." Zane reassures Harry’s feelings.

"And that’s what worries me. But every single time Y/N puts those thoughts to rest. She makes me feel safe, she’s like my home." The singer lets a smile crawl onto his face.

"Every time you talk about Y/N you smile. Definitely smile!" Zane teases Harry which makes his smile grow bigger.

"Stop!" Harry laughs.

-

tag list : @harrysmatcha @harryspinkpillow @helen-with-an-a @florencepughily @peterparkerbae @toji-dabi-wife @fallonx @cherriesrae @alienorknight @valluvsu @drphilssoulmate @ivegotparticulartaste @ayeshathestyles @hazgoldenstyles @eiffelmezarry @tsukishimawhore @renatavieira @michellekstyles @eleanordaisy @shawnsblue @academiaghosts @japanchrry @agustdpeach @hannahnikohl @hrryscherrys @whoscamila @ch3rryrry @msolbesg @newyorker14 @futuristicpalacegardenpsychic @youusunshineyoutemptress @eunoiamaa @kaitieskidmore1 @gublerscherry @cherryfragrancx @ssuziess @milkiane @teenidlemuse @golden-hoax @helen-with-an-a @imthegoofyvillain @flwrmuse @leah2002 @sunshinemendes8 @your--sweetest--downfall @melllinaa @riverjane-d @iluvjj @bisouma @tenaciousperfectionunknown @vodka-is-gay-and-so-am-i @daydreaminrry @cashtons-wife

[alreadyjackbestfriend]

darkest secrets (part 2 of FRIENDSHIP TEST)

Pairing: jack harlow x famous!reader

Genre: fluff

A/N: i think you can read this part alone, but for more context it is better to read the first part. Also, originally this was going to be just one part, but I already wrote a third one today 💀, I really liked this concept of the interviews, so i'll post it soon!

PART 1 HERE

enjoy! hope you like it

Ever since the Friendship Test video, the world has gone crazy when it comes to your friendship with Jack. And not only the fans, obviously also the media: all the magazines, all the youtube channels, all the late night shows, etc, each and every one of them wanted a piece of you and Jack.

After thousands of calls, emails, conversations between your manager and Jack's, finally his schedule coincided with yours, and you agreed to give the world more of the two of you.

This sudden interest in your relationship was a great opportunity for both of you careers, but none of that mattered to you seconds from seeing Jack again.

your makeup artist was doing the finishing touches when you heard a knock on your dressing room door.

"come in!" you yelled, and saw the figure of jack appear behind the door. your heart skipped a beat, and you couldn't help but smile, as jack felt exactly the same, the butterflies in his stomach almost unbearable as you got up from the chair and hugged him with all your strength.

“I missed you” he whispered in your hair.

“missed you too” you said separating yourself from his body and looking at his eyes, you couldn't help but squeeze his face and he smiled harder.

***

“okay guys, the game it’s just questions and answers, there are cards face down on the table that have the questions, if the conversation flows from one of them, just continue, until there is nothing more to say, you pick another” the producer said and you both nodded.

first you recorded your greetings and then continued with the game.

“who goes first?” you asked

“ladies first”, jack answered and you rolled your eyes, but you picked a card.

“what is your worst fear?” you read, “uhh, we started off hard” jack smiled and thought for a few seconds before answering

“losing the people that I love” he said, and you pouted. smiling, he put his thumb to your lips, undoing the pout, "don't pout, luckily it hasn't happened to me yet" you smiled, but inside you felt your pulse quicken from the brief contact, too intimate for the cameras, but too natural between you. He picked his first card.

“how do you see yourself in ten years?” he asked and you thought for a few seconds.

“I hope starting my own family… with someone who loves me and that i can trust” you said.

“so cute” he commented, and you felt the heat permeate your cheeks.

"Which animal do you identify with?" you read, "ohh, let me guess please" you said, and jack nodded, the smile never leaving his face, "with a lion"

"I quite like that answer" he said, leaving you in suspense

"But is that what you were thinking?"

"yes", he confessed, "they are the king of the jungle... besides, I think I look a bit like them" he said, touching his beard and then his hair, you laughed loudly

"you're so stupid"

“but you love me”

“yes” you quickly admitted, making him smile

“love you too”

“I know”

“cocky” he joked, and you shrugged your shoulders, smiling. He picked another card.

“Who is your celebrity crush?”

“Ummm”, you thought, “well, I have two actually”, jack raised his eyebrows in expectation, "first one is leo dicaprio, but but I'm on the verge of failure, I only have a year to conquer him” you said, making the behind-the-scenes crew laugh. you smiled hoping not to get in trouble for that comment, “and the second one is harry styles, but this time i’m too young for him, since he likes older women” you said pouting and jack laughed

“obviously one of your crushes was going to be harry styles”

“are you saying I’m too predictable?” You said pretending you were offended

“nah, I’m just saying that he seems the type of guy you would like”

“Reallyyy?”

“Yes”

“And how do you think is the type of guy I like?”

“physically? tall, with curls, light eyes. personality, well, i don't know what harry is like, so I don't know if I'm going to describe him or not, but i know you like to laugh a lot so he must be funny, and i know you like to have deep conversations, so he must be interested in different types of art and things like that”

“Wow, i didn't know you knew me so well” he winked at you and you laughed, “ok, who is your celebrity crush?” you asked, emphasizing the word "your"

“You”, he said without hesitation, you rolled your eyes

“Be for real jack”, you said and he laughed almost nervously

“Im being for real!”

“I know who your celebrity crush is” you said crossing your arms over your chest and jack had to use all his willpower not to look away at your cleavage

“oh, yeah?”

“yeah”

“And who is it?”

“Alexa Demie”

He laughed, “you caught me”, he said, and even if you didn't want it your stomach fell in disappointment, you would have liked him to keep insisting that you were his celebrity crush, but you knew you weren't.

“You know… if you had admitted that, I would have give you a free pass to be with her” you said without thinking

“Oh, you would give me a free pass?” He said, emphasizing the “you”, and you blushed

“Yes, because I own you”, you said quickly, trying to make your slip pass as a joke, not letting him see your nervousness. He laughed loudly.

“although you’re not wrong”, he said this time and you blushed harder, but rolled your eyes in an attempt to seem calm.

“It drives me crazy when you roll your eyes”, he said almost in a whisper, like only for you to hear, but he knew he was using a microphone. You gulped hard.

“Would you give me a free pass to be with harry styles?” You said, trying to ignore his comment, getting back on topic

“Oh, so you’re implying that I own you?”

“Maybe”, you said elevating one of your shoulders and one of your eyebrows, he smiled widely.

“I would not”, he answered, and your smile dropped.

“What!”

“I don’t like to share”

“I gave you a free pass! I take it back”

“Fine by me, I only want you”

“Jackkkk”, you whined, “stop it!” he just smiled at you, he knew he was making you nervous and he loved it, for a second you just looked at each other, and then you spoke, “you want to pick a card? Since I made the last question” you said, but he ignored your instruction, asking you directly

“Who was your first celebrity crush?” He asked, really interested to know the answer.

“Mmmm, my first celebrity crush was Daniel Radcliffe, you know who he is?”

“I don’t think so”

“The actor that played harry potter, I remember seeing him in the first movie when I was five or maybe six, and found him cute, but when I saw the third one, oh my god”, you widened your eyes and jack raised a brow, “I fell in love”

Jack was trying so hard not to show his jealousy, he couldn’t believe he felt this way about your childhood celebrity crush.

“then I saw the fourth one and I fell harder”, you said

“did you see any of the movies in the theater?”

“Yes, I did, the fifth, and wanted to see part two of the seventh, but I was too sad to do it, I didn’t wanted it to end, i even saw it three years later because I refused to believe it ended”

“I didn’t know you were such a big fan of harry potter”

“Oh, there’s a lot you don’t know about me”, you joked

“That’s not fair”

“Why?”

“You know everything about me”

“No, I don’t”

“Yes, you do”

“I don’t know your darkest secrets, just as you don't know mine” you said and jack thought for a second

“Well, I can tell you one, but since it’s a secret…” he said, removing the microphone from his shirt and indicating you to come closer, you did and he brought his lips close to your ear, “I’m in love with you” he said, and your breath hitched. Jack didn’t know where the urge to confess his feelings had come from, perhaps from the silly jealousy of talking about your celebrity crushes.

“Jack”, you said serious

“You don’t believe me?”

“No, but I'll still tell you one of my darkest secrets” you replied

“Ok”

You also took off your microphone and put your lips close to his ear, “I’m in love with you too” you confessed to him, hoping with all your heart that his had not been a joke, because otherwise the damage would be tremendous.

***

After the game was over and the goodbyes were recorded, you ran to your dressing room as if death itself were chasing you. jack asked his and your team to give you a few minutes alone before he came after you.

"why are you running away from me?" he said opening the door you had left unlocked, finding you in your chair looking at yourself in the mirror, “stop playing”, jack spoke again, approaching you

“I’ll stop playing if you stop playing” you answered, without taking your eyes off the mirror, and you looked at it through the reflection. he quickly turned your chair so you could look him in the eye, and leaned towards you, with each of his hands resting on the armrests, encircling you between his arms

“Ok, I’m being totally serious right now”, he said, feeling the nerves run through his entire body, “what I said was completely true”

“what I said too” You said completely serious, and Jack didn't wait a second before bringing your lips together in a hungry kiss.

Fortunately, Jack already had locked the door.

***

the video came out only a week later, and the comments were crazy again:

user 1: I WANT TO KNOW WHAT THEIR DARKEST SECRETS WERE

user 2: WHAT WERE THE DARKEST SECRETS? I CAN'T DIE WITHOUT KNOWING

user 3: he described himself as the boy she would like 💀 love him

user 4: IT'S SO EVIDENT THAT THEY LIKE EACH OTHER, JUST DATE ALREADY, OR AT LEAST FUCK

user 5: THE SEXUAL TENSION

Liked by yourinstagram, urbanwyatt, lilnasx, shawnmendes and 5.728.748 others

jackharlow we read your comments, and here is the answer… the darkest secrets were: we’re in love with each other 😚🥵🤤

jackfan1 I FUCKING KNEW IT

user1 it was so obvious bro 💀

jackfan2 THE EMOJIS AJLDK stoppp

urbanwyatt 🖤

yourinstagram 🥺 i’m so fucking in love with you

->yourfan Y/N 😭

->user2 I've never seen her in love before, it's surreal

jackfan3 WHAT IF THIS WAS MY LAST STRAW

jackfan4 this is my 13th reason

->jackfan5 girllll 💀

emmachamberlain BEST COUPLE EVER

yourfan2 mom and dad

troyesivan the IT couple

user3 hearts are breaking rn

yourfan3: WHAT ABOUT HARRY yourinstagram?

->yourfan6 LMAO

->yourinstagram my heart is big enough ❤️

->jackharlow yourinstagram stop playing

->yourfan7 she's so funny 😭

->youandjackfan LMAO LSADKJASDJ

[louisupdates]

[Translated from Portuguese]

LINK TO VIDEO INTERVIEW

Former member of the British boy band One Direction, Louis Tomlinson will perform, in May, three shows in Brazil. It will be the third time that the musician will perform in the country, an experience that, according to him, is always chaotic - and "in the best possible sense". This is what the singer said to g1, in an interview held at Allianz Parque, where he will play in São Paulo, on May 11.

The shows are from the "Faith in the Future" tour, in which Louis returns to his latest album, released in 2022. The setlist also involves songs from the album "Walls" and, of course, One Direction hits.

Fever among children and adolescents in the 2010s, the pop group was formed from the TV show "The X Factor" and lasted six years, breaking up in 2016. Since then, the musicians have followed a solo career. A fact that, in Louis' eyes, is inevitably competitive.

"Your only reference is to compare yourself with the other members," said the Englishman. "You start to think, 'If they're getting this, why am I not getting it?'"

On Spotify, the number of monthly listeners among artists differs a lot. The most popular star of the divorced boy band, Harry Styles has about 58.2 million. Next are Zayn Malik (27.3 million), Niall Horan (17.3 million), Liam Payne (5.7 million) and Louis (2.9 million).

But if success meters like this were once a burden for the musician, today they are no longer, according to him, who also made a point of reiterating that he has always been proud of his friends.

In the interview, the musician also commented on subjects such as the conspiracy theories that describe him as a partner of Styles, the changes of concept between his albums, a Brazilian remix of his "Kill My Mind" - from the funkeiro FP of Trem Bala -, and his interest in fashion

g1 - What is the main difference between the Louis Tomlinson of the X Factor, 2010 and the Louis Tomlinson of today?

Louis Tomlinson - There is a lot of naivete in the boy who appeared in the X Factor. I really didn't know what I was getting into. I didn't know how that would put me sitting here. I definitely had no idea what I was acquiring.

I think I feel much more fulfilled. More confident. It took me a while to have enough courage to say: 'I'm creative, I'm a singer, I'm a composer

Now, I'm just internalizing all these feelings. When you grow up in a place like Doncaster, where I grew up, it takes a while to believe in all these things. Because you only watched it from afar, on TV or on the radio. So, when you become one of these people, there is a whole process until you believe and understand everything.

g1 - And what is the greatest similarity?

Louis Tomlinson - Probably my appearance (laughs). Well, I hope my fans don't correct me here. I like to think that I've always had a very lovely relationship with them. I think that's the only constant thing.

g1 - Do you know any Brazilian singer or band?

Louis Tomlinson - We were talking today about Anitta. And hm... Fresh? Fre? Fresno? I'm learning. I hope [the confusion with the band's name] didn't sound disrespectful, it wasn't my intention.

Do you have any recommendations for me? I got some tips today. What do you have for me?

g1 - There is a Brazilian musician called FP do Trem Bala. He made a remix of 'Kill My Mind'...

Louis Tomlinson - That's cool! So far, you were the one who made the best recommendation. Definitely.

g1 - Can I show you?

Louis Tomlinson - Of course!

g1 - What's up? Did you like it? Is there anything you would like to say to the FP of the Bullet Train?

Louis Tomlinson - Yes, it's a vibe. Fun. Very fun. Thank you for making a remix of the song.

g1 - This is your third time in Brazil. What comes to your mind when you hear things like 'doing a show in Brazil', 'Brazilian tour', or simply 'Brazilian fans'?

Louis Tomlinson - Chaos. And in the best possible sense. I totally love it.

Live experiences are defined by the most chaotic moments. And coming here and always feeling this energy is as if from the first drum beat, the fans were already there. It's a really triumphant feeling.

g1 - In musical terms, how was the experience of creating 'Faith in the Future' compared to 'Walls'?

Louis Tomlinson - I felt much more fulfilled, confident. I had more understanding of what I wanted to do and how to do it.

[On the first album], there was the factor that I left One Direction. It was as if my head was a mess and there was so much to think about... It didn't have a clear direction. I had to go through the experimentation phase to, in fact, understand who I am as an artist. That took time.

Throughout my creation of 'Walls', this was happening, but I was in a clearer, more concise place going to 'Faith in the Future'. And I think that made [the second] album better.

g1 - Recently, you created 28 Clothing, a fashion brand. What is your relationship with this sector?

Louis Tomlinson - I've always had a very funny relationship with fashion. Without a doubt, I'm interested in clothes, I've always been. Since I was young. But there is a level of haute couture that goes far beyond my understanding.

You know, I like to dress well. The brand is something I've always wanted to do. It is also intertwined with one of my [greatest] passions, football.

Football and fashion have been connected since the game was a game. People's fashion in the stands and everything else...

I think it's a very interesting thing and, for sure, a culture in which I was already inserted when I was younger. So, the brand helps me tell my story.

g1 - You once mentioned that you felt a little uncomfortable and more competitive at the beginning of your solo career. You said you were a little upset because you kept comparing your level of success with that of the other members of One Direction. Do you still feel that way?

Louis Tomlinson - No, I don't feel like it. Really. But I think that anyone - and obviously, there won't be many people who can identify with it - but anyone who has gone through a similar situation...

Being in a band and leaving on your own will always make your only reference be to compare yourself with other members. That's literally all you have.

I think it's a matter of maturity, actually. It took me a long time to look at it for what it was. Because that's where petulance begins. You start to think: 'If they're getting this, why can't I do it?'. And that becomes a little toxic.

Unfortunately, this is the nature of the music industry. It is naturally competitive. We are all competing for spots.

But now I see it in a very different way. And as I said, this requires maturity. I also needed to succeed on my own to be able to get through this. To overcome this.

Now, this comes back as I feel a confidence in saying these things.

Oh, and just to reiterate, because it's important: while I felt competitive, or more competitive than I am today, it wasn't like I wasn't immensely proud of everything the boys were doing.

It was more about reflecting on my own situation. Just about thinking: 'Oh, I wish I had a little of that'.

Now, I feel in a very, very, different place. And it's a nicer thing to feel, because being very competitive isn’t always the nicest feeling.

g1 - I imagine you hear questions like this all the time, right? Does it bother you?

Louis Tomlinson - Yes, it's okay. As I mentioned before, I understand the obvious public interest in One Direction. That's obvious. And you know, I appreciate that these things are interesting. I suppose [that they are].

g1 - Louis, many fans believe in the conspiracy theory that you’re dating Harry Styles, even though you describe this story as ridiculous. Why is this conspiracy so famous?

Louis Tomlinson - What I realized a few years ago is that there is nothing I can say, there is nothing I can do to stop those who believe in this conspiracy. They are so connected with what they believe they will not see the truth for what it actually is. I'm sure many people look and find all these little conspiracies that happen in life interesting.

I would be lying if I said it doesn't annoy me a little, but it's the nature of the work.

There are times when it gets very personal. I have my son, Freddie. He's the most important person in my life. And occasionally, [these theories] end up addressing things that are kind of unfair.

That's what we have now. There's nothing I can do about it. Nothing I can say to stop people from inventing what they want to invent. So, so be it.

g1 - Finally, what is your favorite song at the moment and why?

Louis Tomlinson - My favorite album is Paolo Nutini's last. It's great, amazing. He's an amazing singer, maybe he's my favorite singer. It's indeed an inspiring album.

And favorite music... I can't remember the name, but it's from The Libertines, a band I've liked since I was young.

[g-xix]

favourite sidemen videos?

AGHHH I LOVE ASKS LIKE THIS!! Ty for asking this :)

In order of oldest to newest...

Sidemen Fear Pong - Featuring Harrry's doggo Herb and the iconic "DRIVERS OF LONDON!"

Sidemen Yoga - Featuring "PHIL!", prime sexiness JJ and zesty Harry... This video gave me sm ideas of making smutshots for Phil (but i thought nobody rly wants to see hardcore Phil smut and decided against 💀💀)

The Sidemen Show Ep4 - Haunted House - Literally just a Sam and Colby vid filmed by British idiots also featuring my fave JME

Hide and Seek at Wireless - Genuinely SO GOOD, like, Wroetostar combo goes SO HARD, Hide and Seeks were at their peak when they filmed this, they had sm energy and clearly were enjoying this shit so much... Plus all their charity match hairstyles are such a throwback to see

Sidemen Bowling - So goofy, loved this era where they were all just enjoying making budget ass content together which they somehow always found a way to violate

Sidemen Olympics - Tbh i just loved comparing my sporting ability to them + knowing i can throw a discus farther than all of these mf's and their highest scores

Christmas Football Challenges - Pervy Santa!JJ will also never be topped

Try not to Laugh: w Jack Whitehall / Shocking edition / Bad jokes edition

One word Interview - Shoutout Simon, one of the best YouTube series imo... He's got way more on his channel w each member + these answers are j so iconic

James Charles Makeup Challenge - featuring Click house, KSImon, and Harry's gay panic era

£10,000 vs £10: first holiday / roadtrip / Europe holiday / song

Sidemen Go Back to School - Literally the video that first introduced me to them. Absolutely iconic. Featuring Phil, Stephen Tries and Babatunde, this and the Sidemen Bake Off are their 2 vids that go hand in hand for most iconic atl imo

Worst Outfit Wins - not the exact title but summarises it better. Didn't like this thumbnail initially and put off watching it for a looong time but honestly it's too jokes to skip

Sidemen Become Parents - Literally the way that they descend to chaos and slowly become worse and worse parents is something special that everyone needs to see, full fuckin stop.

24 Hours Handcuffed - trust me.

Make a Christmas Song - Love these songs sm, literally have them on my acc Xmas playlist

Sidemen Dragon's Den - Featuring Niko, Max Fosh (Bosh), BambinoBecky, Chi With A C, Cal² and more

Hot Wings Challenge - Lol, love seeing their pain in this + JJ's Reddit absolutely peaked when this video came out

Sidemen Pub Golf + Europe edition- Just iconic, first post!lockdown pint with the boys where absolutely everyone got involved... and it ended badly for everyone except Harry and Ethan. Europe edition features Harry's birthday and just a lot more chaos i suppose.

Sidemen Gogglebox - Harry and Ethan are fresh off of a night out and cba, KSImon is released once more, and Josh, Vik and Tobi are just fulfilling their duty of watching the programs 🤷‍♀️ Thrilling post!lockdown entertainment imo

Sidemen Silent Library (1) and (2) - super new n unconventionial concept which was just really enjoyable to watch

The Cube - They're missing half the Sidemen but have Big Randy and Stephen Tries instead. They just get drunk to cope with the depression and it turns out for a pretty good vid.

Sidemen Hole in The Wall - solely for Waterman tbh

Forfeit Blind Dates - Ethan's pervy clown character, Deji's sheer energy (litr made me girl-crush on him) and that leng last lady, whole vid was a rare Sidemen banger

Japanese Gameshow - Loved the style with JJ as the host tbh he really fit it, and ofc the Deji feature was an added bonus

Weirdest Hotels - Featuring the Chrismd on a team w Harry n Vik, this rly was an absolute banger honestly

Mystery Box Challenge - idk something j felt very authentic excitement and interest about this vid

Sidemen Become Farmers - brought out the most wholesome and sexy side of the Sidemen all around

SMALLEST VS BIGGEST CAR - Hands down SUCH a banger, the chemistry between all these TERRIFIED mfs and the surprise guest (ᴉɾǝp upside down) ik the sidemen often feel overproduced, but this felt like such a genuine shiggles vid. Oh, and that kiss between Ethan and mystery guest was err... yeah.

Lol that took an hour of my life.

Anyways, if you're ever bored and wanna binge the unanimously decided best vids of the sidemen- I've collated these vids (and a few more) into a YouTube PLAYLIST which u can add to your libraries n watch whenever - or just check out to see whether you've watched all of these or missed any

anyways, hope you've enjoyed that bc that was LONG

And those are j main channel SDMN vids, but there's sooo many good vids on the moresdmn channel on top of these... MoreSidemen has sm mf hidden gems man, one day you'll see 🙏🙏

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

thank you for your work in the Taylor Swift trenches, i find her so psychologically fascinating. i think i remember you enjoying 1d back in the day so i’m curious what you think about harry styles seemingly being the one bf she feels lingering nostalgia for after all this time

so glad you asked. my deepest belief about her and harry is that they have an understanding about each other as people whose incredible gift beyond any question of artistry or musicianship or creativity or stage presence is simply being preternaturally good at being famous and navigating the waters of fame. they go about it in different ways but their kinship on this matter transcends trivial surface matters of style (heh). i think they spent the whole time watching each other’s post-haylor PR shenanigans and embodying the concept of game recognize game. so if she has actual nostalgia for him as opposed to merely being on good terms (which i think she is with the werewolf kid these days too, and the jonas brother till she sided with his ex in the divorce) i think it’s because that kind of mindmeld can’t be easy to find when you are in possession of such a rare gift. it’s like sherlock and moriarty on elementary, you know? he’ll never go back, but god, what it meant once to be understood!

also i’m too lazy to find it now but during the 1989 press cycle she def did an interview where she alluded to some of the songs being about “a relationship” that was like, so off and on that it was the kind of relationship where at your wedding some part of you would wait for them to interrupt…. ok i typed that out and was like, did she really say it like that or am i projecting? but yeah she did. her little wink wink “i never have to name names :)” in there is so funny too because in another 1989 press interview when asked about “style” she said “we should have just called it ‘i’m not even sorry.’” people cry “unhinged behavior” when she writes songs about dudes NO! this right here is the true derangement of taylor! this is the same interview where she’s like “bad blood is about this woman celebrity who was always super weird to me and then tried to sabotage a tour by hiring everyone away from me” which she years later retconned to be like “i said it was about a friend and i can sleep at night knowing i never pointed fingers at anyone :)” lolololololol.

sorry i got distracted by her serial killer antics. anyway. so there is some relationship where she never had a real sense of closure, and like maybe she still feels this way about this person 9 years later - sounds bonkers but It’s Taylor - but equally probably i think she just finds the narrative of the one that got away to be romantic and dramatic in a way that is compelling to return to artistically.

my other insane haylor conspiracy theory i don’t really believe is that they are true blue PR4PR soulmates (see above) and while i think they probably wrote some stuff about each other i also would not be surprised if they have a mutual agreement that it’s cool to use each other as a misdirect to write about other people while hiding in plain sight. when one direction taylor swifted taylor swift with “perfect” young harold DID say “if you’re looking for someone to write your break-up songs about…” this would align perhaps with the whole matty healy Situation which who knows what ever happened there but which i do kinda think she was planning to Launch as a the-one-that-got-away-returned-to-me type narrative based on their shenanigans this summer (mouthing “this is for you you know who you are i love you” in concerts a few days apart). oh my god i have spent soooo much mental energy on this woman this year but it was just so funny how 36 hours after the break-up was official she was like “remember how i spent six years talking about how much i love being private and hiding my real life away? well i fuckin LIED.” anyway. so there’s a part of me that’s like, well taylor knows if she puts green eyes in a song everyone will go “harry” and that’ll be that and harry won’t mind because game recognize game. and this will always work because they never go out of—[forcibly dragged offstage because of giant cartoon hook]

[foxes-that-run]

Coney Island

To Zane Lowe (at 36mins) Taylor talked about Coney Island being about male regret and place everyone wanted to be but now with the lights are off. In this Lyric video Taylor referenced Harry's winding wheels, a metaphor for soulmates. It is co-written with William Bowery, Joe has no credit.

Winding Wheel

The Winding Wheel is a Ryan Adams’ song. (Ryan made a rock cover album of 1989). There is a post about it here. Ryan described it as a metaphor for an “ultimate soulmate”.

13 December 2013, Harry posted 'better still be my winding wheel' on Taylor's birthday. Say don't go was written 2 weeks later.

27 February 2015, the first photos of Taylor with Calvin were posted and Harry posted an overgrown winding wheel to IG

11 January 2018, Taylor put a Ferris Wheel in the open of End Game

11 December 2020, this Lyric Video has a ferris wheel

This is very long, this song hits so many classic Haylor themes that its dense. When it is all written out like this it boggles my mind people would think it is about another muse or several.

Taylor also said on radio about Coney Island:

"Aaron Dessner sent me this track that he created with his brother Bryce, and I wrote the lyrics and the melody with William Bowery. I was coming from a place of somebody who’s been in a relationship for decades and wakes up one day & realizes that they have taken their partner for granted. It speaks to people who are trying to communicate - but they’re two ships passing in the night. They’re trying to love each other but their signals are somehow missing each other.”

She also said ships in the nights about Exile in that interview and in the lyrics of Willow.

Live performances

Coney Island has been played live once, 28 April 2023 in Atlanta. This is one day before the High Infidelity anniversary of April 29. The other song was The Other Side of the Door which has similar theme of wanting a lover back and regret for ruining a relationship.

Lyrics

[Verse 1: Taylor Swift] Break my soul in two looking for you But you're right here If I can't relate to you anymore Then who am I related to?

The opening verse does not pull punches, it ends with 'if I can't relate to who then who am I related to?' Taylor and Harry have a lot of shared history, similar careers and while no one is as big as Taylor Harry is in a small group who can relate. They have respectively sung about being each others soulmate. To loose that is devastating.

Breaking her soul looking is similar to:

Don't blame me "For you, I would cross the line / fall from grace"

Illicit affairs "And you know damn well / For you I would ruin myself / …a million little times"

Slut! "And if they call me a slut / You know it might be worth it for once"

And if this is the long haul How'd we get here so soon? Did I close my fist around something delicate? Did I shatter you?

This again refers to this concept that even apart they are each others person, so to feel they aren’t connecting is a loss

Closing her fist around something Delicate is a reference to the song, which is also about Harry, more on why here. Shattering him is a reference to Falling, to be so lonely. and possibly renegade. Shattered pieces are also in mirrorball.

[Chorus: Taylor Swift] And I'm sitting on a bench in Coney Island Wondering, where did my baby go? The fast times, the bright lights, the merry go Sorry for not making you my centerfold

The fast times, bright lights describe their life, the place to be:

I Know Places: "Lights flash and we’ll run for the fences"

Wonderland: "Flashing lights and we took a wrong turn and we fell down a rabbit hole"

New Romantics: "We’re all here, the lights and noise are blinding"

Is it Over Now: "And did you think I didn't see you? / There were flashin' lights"

Merry-go round, and lost again with no surprises, disappointments refers to the cyclical nature of their relationship.

Blank Space: "But you’ll come back each time you leave"

Style: "And when we go crashing down we come back every time"

Cardigan: "And I knew you’d come back to"me"

OOTW "We were built to fall apart / Then fall back together (back together)"

Sorry for not making me your centerfold breaks my heart, meaning sorry you were not her end game when she thought he would stay with Joe. Lets take Labyrinth as a nice sequel.

Over and over Lost again with no surprises Disappointments, close your eyes And it gets colder and colder When the sun goes down

Maroon "How the hell did we lose sight of us again? Sobbin' with your head in your hands Ain't that the way shit always ends?" The chorus ends sadly, with it getting colder and colder the longer it goes on like that.

Taylor has referred to watching sunsets with Harry, usually in happy, wistful times, but here it is sad, the sun is setting on them. Sunsets are also in:

Out Of The Woods: When you started crying, baby, I did, too, but when the sun came up I was looking at you

Wildest Dreams: "Say you’ll remember me standing in a nice dress, staring at the sunset, babe"

It’s Nice To Have A Friend: Light pink sky up on the roof, sun sinks down, no curfew

Harry and Taylor also posted Sunset photos in Cannes a year apart, which Taylor referenced in the promotion for Cruel Summer, Slut!'s music video also had a similar sky.

[Verse 2: Matt Berninger with Taylor Swift] The question pounds my head What's a lifetime of achievement If I pushed you to the edge But you were too polite to leave me?

The lifetime achievement having no meaning without this muse reflects a theme that Harry and Taylor have sung about the cost of fame in Mirrorball, your on your own kid and Sign of the Times. In Suburban Legends Taylor sings "I didn't come here to make friends We were born to be suburban legends" which to me plays into the idea that they put their careers first and the relationship suffered.

Suburban Legends "I broke my own heart 'cause you were too polite to do it"

And do you miss the rogue Who coaxed you into paradise and left you there? Will you forgive my soul When you're too wise to trust me and too old to care?

Taylor describes Harry as a rogue is a troublemaker Harry has been in IKYWT, "you were trouble", 22 "you look like bad news" Style "James Dean daydream" and Ready for it? "Knew he was a killer first time that I saw him". Harry has also described himself this way in Trouble "You know i’m trouble / I’m trouble with you"

He coaxed her into paradise and left her there in the Virgin Isles in Now that we don't talk and famously the boat.

[Chorus: Taylor Swift with Matt Berninger] 'Cause we were like the mall before the internet It was the one place to be The mischief, the gift-wrapped suburban dreams Sorry for not winning you an arcade ring

Taylor talks about the line of the mall before the internet because it was the one place to be to Zane Lowe, linked above. I love this line, they were the one place to be, the two biggest pop stars in love. I also find a parallel in this line and August, "And say, "Meet me behind the mall" August being the other person, not Harry and Taylor, they meet behind the mall which Harry and Taylor are.

Gift-wrapped suburban dreams refers to Suburban Legends, where Harry and Taylor are the idols of suburbia. "We were born to be suburban legends [...] We were born to be national treasures/ When you told me we'd get back together"

Similar to the centerfold line, not winning you an arcade ring is saying sorry for not getting back together as they had thought. Falling is Harry's perspective on this belief that Taylor would stay with someone else. This time I will choose SOTB as my sequel track. ;)

[Bridge: Taylor Swift, Matt Berninger, Both] Were you waiting at our old spot In the tree line by the gold clock Did I leave you hanging every single day? Were you standing in the hallway With a big cake, happy birthday

In the unreleased Hunger Harry indicates they may have broken up on his birthday "We could ruin a perfect night / On my birthday I made you cry". This may have been in 2015, they had been seen together in late 2014, up to 2 weeks before Harry's birthday. Then Taylor was in Nashville on his birthday and she met CH 3 weeks later.

Hallways are also in 10 songs, generally meeting in them, but here they break up. Taylor also mentioned the birthday line to Zane Lowe as the album came out just before her birthday.

Did I paint your bluest skies the darkest grey? A universe away And when I got into the accident The sight that flashed before me was your face But when I walked up to the podium I think that I forgot to say your name

The accident is a reference to the Snow mobile accident in Is it over now? and OOTW: "Remember when you hit the brakes too soon / Twenty stitches in a hospital room / When you started crying, baby, I did too / But when the sun came up, I was looking at you"

To me, I forgot to say your name at the podium is a reference to Taylors 2013 VMA speech where she said "I'd like to say the person who inspired this song, you know exactly who you are, and now I have one of these!" Harry and Taylor were both musicians, the inspired each other and as evidenced by still writing to each other 10 years later this speech diminished that.

Harry’s unreleased Talk and includes “You forgot my name / Sick and tired of me, I can feel the heat” which, no one forgets his name so I take it as referring to the podium.

[lonelycowgirls]

Leather Bomb

I read Daisy Jones and the Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid last year and much like pretty much everyone else on the planet, I loved it. The concept really inspired me and I've had this piece saved to my laptop for months, so I got home today and thought, "why not post it, we'll see what people think."

This is a little taster for it, I'm not 100% on a name for the series, I just wanted to test the waters. Of course, this is a work of fiction, so it's not tied to real-life events and timelines. It's just a bit of fun.

Enjoy, like and reblog.

Nel xo

~

Warnings: None

Word count: 1.7k

Interviewer: Veronica Styles… thanks so much for joining us.  I think I speak for everyone when I tell you how much of an honour it is for you to agree to a chat with us.

Veronica: The pleasure is all mine.  You have my rider… Styles gives me a wink from across the coffee table between us.

Interviewer: I’d love to go back to the beginning.  Your story is so fascinatingly illusive it seems almost a crime to not delve into the origins.  You’ve had an almost Priscilla Presley level of intrigue present in your life, tell me about how you dealt with that when you first met Harry.

Veronica: Well, it’s quite funny actually… to be here talking with you about this in this format.  It definitely makes me feel old.  Harry always used to say, ‘I’ll open up about our life when I’m old and grey and all this is a memory.’  She gestures to her white hair, as curly as it was when she was in her 20s.  Her husband famously said he would retire from the spotlight at 50 years old.  The musician has since recently released his 30th album at the age of 72.  It’s your lucky day, darling.  I suppose I can see how you would get to that comparison but it feels very strange to connect myself with Priscilla.  Elvis is an icon and was a real change of pace for pop culture in the 60s.  She pauses and then a cat-like smile slides itself across her face.  I suppose Harry was, is, very similar.  I know it’s reductive to think of him as simply a husband and a father but that is who he is to me, it’s difficult to see him as anything else.  To acknowledge your question, I simply didn’t deal with it.  It was very much a head stuck in the sand situation for me.  Harry was not an easy person to deal with in those days.  He’s mellowed out a lot now, granted he’s in his 70s and, if anything, more stubborn than ever.  But you see, Harry was a package deal.  To love him, was to love his lifestyle, his job, his fame, his manager, his publicist, and his fanbase.  She chuckles fondly, reminiscence present on her features.  We used to joke about how we were one step away from having his personal assistant in bed with us…  I dealt with that in my own way, and I suppose I have regrets when it comes to that.  I was very young… She answers coyly and open-ended; a Styles trademark.  I have a feeling I may have touched a slightly exposed nerve with my question.

Interviewer: You were 17 years old when you and Harry met.  Can you remember what your first thoughts were during that meeting?  People often talk about a shift when they meet significant people.

Veronica: I think I have a slightly tainted point of view on that sentiment.  It’s almost…  artificial.  Because, when we met it did feel very significant because everyone was telling me how significant it was.  So, while I absolutely agree that I knew I’d met someone special, it’s because I truly had.  I’d met someone that was incredibly famous, successful and who was culturally disruptive.  I suppose it wasn’t until later on that I realised it was a different kind of special.  A special that was going to have a personal effect on my life.

Interviewer: You couldn’t possibly have known at that time that you would marry this man and have children with him.  Did you have any inkling in yourself that you would even meet him again?

Veronica: I hoped that I would.  I used to always laugh when reading about people who fall in love with their future partners at the first meeting because I just didn’t think that was possible.  Harry and I were electric, we didn’t realise it at the time, but looking back it was truly a match of souls, as lovey-dovey as that sounds.  When you’re young, everything feels colossal in terms of importance.  Because as bad as it sounds, your world revolves around you.  And, I don’t know, hormones are raging and in abundance.  So, your reactions to things are super-powered.  I thought of nothing else after I’d met Harry.  He’s an old man now, but you have to understand the level of sexual magnetism he held, the charisma.  He was incredibly wanted and lusted after.  He was everything young girls wanted and dreamed of.  I was never immune to that, the usual trope is, ‘I liked her because she was different, she didn't fawn over me’.  I’m not admitting that I fawned, but I didn't have the cool girl demeanour people often attach to me.  I was very aware and receptive to his effect on me as a young woman.  So, yeah, I was desperate to meet him again once I had.  But more in the way of a teenager wanting to see her crush again; it was natural.

Interviewer: Can you remind us of that first meeting?

Veronica: Oh, gosh.  Okay, so Harry’s story is always different, to be honest, I don’t think he even remembers fully because parts of it change every time he tells it.  I laugh as she rolls her eyes.  All I know is he took a liking to me when we first met, but he didn't make much of an effort to follow up on that.  At that point, women were queuing up to offer him anything he wanted, and he didn't have time to pursue someone he didn't know or who wasn’t game for it, if you know what I mean.  His time was taken up, let's just say that.  So, anyway, we met at an arena; my friend and I had signed up for agency work at a hospitality company and we’d been sent out to Manchester International Arena, and they were hosting the Brits there.  So, we’d been put on VIP drinks service, Harry at that time, was not at VIP level, he’d get there eventually as we know.  But it was an odd time because he was very famous and beloved within his fanbase, but the general public were taking time to, kind of, catch up to that.  But his friend, Ed Sheeran, was enjoying the VIP experience and took Harry as a sort of unofficial plus one, I say unofficial but he was never kicked out so I don’t think anyone had a problem with him being there.  I was working the bar and I saw him standing around a tall table, chatting and laughing.  But he has this nervous tick, where he scratches the back of his neck and when he had long hair he’d toss it all forward, ruffle it up and then flick his head, kind of, off to the side and smooth it through his fingers.  He did that A LOT.  And I remember thinking, ‘this guy is gonna get a crick in his neck if he does that anymore tonight’.  But he did, and each time he did it he’d glance around him and then try to look interested in the conversation he was supposed to be having.  I only learned this was a nervous tick when I noticed his hands were shaking.  And I mean, shaking.  Anyway, I think I must have watched him do that about seven times before he looked around and caught my eyes.  I was very shy so I looked away immediately, I was so embarrassed but I couldn’t help but glance back and I saw him still looking with a smirk on his face.  But he also had this quizzical look in his eyes.  I always say to him, you looked at me like I was a crossword and you just couldn’t wait to get the last clue to complete it.  Very whimsical of me, I know.  She laughs again and fiddles with the ends of her hair, shaking her head thoughtfully.  She hasn’t made much eye contact with me by this time, choosing to glance just past me.   He didn't speak to me until the very end of the VIP service.  He came up and asked for my name.  I told him and he drew it out long in his accent, but not like my accent, I knew immediately he was from Cheshire.  It’s like a posh version of a proper northerner, he hates when I say that, so definitely put that in.  I bet you can’t believe how much I remember.  It’s sad, isn’t it?

Interviewer: Absolutely not, this is gold.  I don’t suppose you remember what he said to you?

Veronica: Not completely.  Probably something smug ‘cause he’s a cocky git when he wants to be.  She properly laughs.  I just know that I felt warmth when he was close.  He was very attentive and very easy to talk to… but very hard to actually draw anything significant from, you probably remember that from his interviews.  Before he left he decided to down his drink, not very impressively, and he stared at me while he did it.  He slammed his glass down on the bar, gave me a nod and then he was gone.

Interviewer: Okay, so you meet Harry at 17.  Then most people will be shocked to hear that you didn't meet him again until much later, is that accurate?

Veronica: Yes, a lot of people think that we are somewhat childhood sweethearts.  It was nice at the time for people to believe that.  Harry doesn’t like to talk about relationships at all in the public sphere, that’s why I’ve never actually spoken much to the media before now.  We didn't start actually seeing each other romantically until I was about… 23, I think?  So, he was 25, he’d left his band and gone out on his own.  Height of fame and success, he was seeing Camille Rowe, yeah… all that good stuff.  She seems uneasy again but shakes it off with a smile in my direction.  I’d just completed my degree and I was training as a nurse.  So… She pauses for a long time, almost a minute, staring and thinking.  This is a story that I don’t think anyone has heard before… it’s going to be odd telling it.  All I’ll say to preface it is that it is and was a real source of emotional turmoil for everyone involved.  I nod and try to ensure her that as a journalist, I personally cannot in good conscience take on a story that she doesn’t want to tell.  She reassures me.  I’m not getting any younger, it’ll be somewhat... freeing to finally open up about it.

Let me know what you think!

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Harry Belafonte on His Artistic Values and His Activism

In interviews and articles in The New York Times, Mr. Belafonte, who died on Tuesday, spoke about the civil rights movement and his frustration with how Black life was depicted onscreen.

Harry Belafonte, the singer, actor and activist whose wide-ranging success blazed a trail for other Black artists in the 1950s, died on Tuesday at age 96.

A child of Harlem, Mr. Belafonte used his platform at the height of the entertainment world to speak out frequently on his music, how Black life was depicted onscreen and, most important to him, the civil rights movement. Here are some of the insights Mr. Belafonte provided to The New York Times during his many decades in the public spotlight, as they appeared at the time:

His music

Mr. Belafonte’s string of hits, including “Day-O (The Banana Boat Song)” and “Jamaica Farewell,” helped create an American obsession with Caribbean music that led his record company to promote him as the “King of Calypso.”

But Mr. Belafonte never embraced that sort of monarchical title, rejecting “purism” as a “cover-up for mediocrity” and explaining that he saw his work as a mash-up of musical styles.

He told The New York Times Magazine in 1959 that folk music had “hidden within it a great dramatic sense, and a powerful lyrical sense.” He also plainly conceded: “I don’t have a great voice.”

In 1993, he told The Times that he used his songs “to describe the human condition and to give people some insights into what may be going on globally, from what I’ve experienced.”

Sign up for the Watching newsletter, for Times subscribers only.  Streaming TV and movie recommendations from critic Margaret Lyons and friends. Get it in your inbox.

He said that “Day-O,” for instance, was a way of life.

“It’s a song about my father, my mother, my uncles, the men and women who toil in the banana fields, the cane fields of Jamaica,” he said. “It’s a classic work song.”

His views on film and television

Mr. Belafonte’s success in music helped him become a Hollywood leading man. In the 1950s and 1960s, Mr. Belafonte and his friend Sidney Poitier landed more substantive and nuanced roles than Black actors had previously received.

Nonetheless, Mr. Belafonte was left largely unsatisfied.

Writing for The Times in 1968, he complained that “the real beauty, the soul, the integrity of the black community is rarely reflected” on television.

“The medium is dominated by white-supremacy concepts and racist attitudes,” he wrote. “TV excludes the reality of Negro life, with all its grievances, passions and aspirations, because to depict that life would be to indict (or perhaps enrich?) much of what is now white America and its institutions. And neither networks nor sponsors want that.”

Mr. Belafonte emphasized that his 10-year-old son saw few Black heroes on television.

“The nobility in his heritage and the values that could complement his positive growth and sense of manhood are denied him,” he wrote. “Instead, there is everything to tear him down and give him an inferiority complex. He will see the Negro only as a rioter and a social problem, never as a whole human being.”

Roughly 25 years later, Mr. Belafonte was circumspect, suggesting in an interview with The Times that little had changed.

“Even today, on the big screen, the pictures that are always successful are pictures where blacks appear in the way white America buys it,” he said in 1993. “And we’re told that what we really want to express is not profitable and is not commercially viable.”

His politics and activism

Even as Mr. Belafonte was in the prime of his entertainment career, he was intently focused on activism and civil rights.

“Back in 1959,” Mr. Belafonte told The Times in 1981, “I fully believed in the civil-rights movement. I had a personal commitment to it, and I had my personal breakthroughs — I produced the first black TV special; I was the first black to perform at the Waldorf Astoria. I felt if we could just turn the nation around, things would fall into place.”

But Mr. Belafonte lamented that by the middle of the 1970s, the movement had ended.

“When the doors of Hollywood shut on minorities and blacks at the end of the 70’s,” he said, “a lot of black artists had been enjoying the exploitation for 10 years. But one day they found the shop had closed down.”

Mr. Belafonte remained outspoken about politics in his later years. In 2002 he accused Secretary of State Colin L. Powell of abandoning his principles to “come into the house of the master”; he called President George W. Bush a “terrorist” in 2006, and lamented in 2012 that modern celebrities had “turned their back on social responsibility.”

“There’s no evidence that artists are of the same passion and of the same kind of commitment of the artists of my time,” he told The Times in 2016. “The absence of black artists is felt very strongly because the most visible oppression is in the black community.”

In 2016 and again in 2020, he visited the opinion pages of The Times to urge voters to reject Donald J. Trump.

“The vote is perhaps the single most important weapon in our arsenal,” Mr. Belafonte told The Times in the 2016 article. “The same things needed now are the same things needed before,” he added. “Movements don’t die because struggle doesn’t die. ”

[pebblysand]

Behind the scenes fic item: 18?

Also hello and thank you and please 💕.

hi there! apologies for the delay in answering this (and, in advance, for the length of this). for those who aren’t privy to mine and @turanga4’s DMs (lol), i was a bit stumped on what to write about, for this ask: what is a line/scene you’re really proud of? give us the DVD commentary for that scene. i kind of feel like i’ve talked at length about all the scenes i’m proud of in my fics, and additional commentary is a bit unnecessary and/or boring. so i asked @turanga4 what she wanted me to write about and she said the AK lesson scene, or the “conversation” with Giulia at her grave. as i’ve not yet gotten to the latter in my most recent re-reads, i’ve chosen to talk to you about the AK lesson scene. 

that said, i think that to talk about this scene, i need to take a broader view on the origins of castles as a story, and particularly on the genesis of the castles!auror!harry plotline. this is because i think this scene was one of the very first i had in my head when i picked up my early drafts of castles and decided to give the fic a real go in 2020, and it is really fundamental to the canon i’ve established about harry’s career. 

as you probably know if you follow me on here and have heard (read) me talk about castles before: when i started to write castles, it was very much in reaction to other post-war fics i was seeing in fandom. and, particularly, it was a reaction to the fics i wasn’t seeing. there was this strange thing of: whilst i was reading good fics, none of them were what i saw the post-war world to be. either the fics were heavily hinny-filtered (meaning that the romance was the main focus and the rest of the world was secondary) or they were filled with magical lore and worldbuilding, which is interesting but not always my cup of tea. i’ve always said that my dream HP spin-off would be a west-wing-style, political drama on post-war rebuilding, and i wasn’t finding the “real” and raw, wizarding-world-filtered social commentary that i wanted to read. and, while i didn’t land on the west-wing per se, i knew that i wanted castles to explore that world, and be more about the realistic rebuilding efforts and struggles for harry & co, both on a macro, societal level, and on a more micro personal level, for all of them.

i’m not going to get into the debate of whether castles is canon-compliant and/or “realistic” again, as framed within the HP universe. i’ve said this before but i think the concept of realism itself is obviously something that is influenced by a myriad of factors, depending on the kind of fiction you like, who you are, your sensibilities, your experience of the world and what reading you have of the series. i also think that no fiction is meant to be totally “realistic” or else it would depict real life and would be really, fucking boring. so this is a conversation for another time. but at least in my head, the ethos of developing this story was: okay, what would a realistic post-war take on the world look like to me?

obviously, within that, there is a massive part of the post-war established canon (which i was determined to stick to) that is: harry becomes an auror. according to JKR’s interviews, he not only becomes an auror but he does so more or less right after the war, determined to catch the last remaining death eaters and bring “peace” to the world. and, i don’t think i’m expressing a particularly radical take in saying that most people in fandom don’t always love this. either because they wanted harry to lead a quiet life after the war, or because they see him as a quidditch player, a teacher - or because (and, i think - personally - this is the most interesting one) the fandom is mostly made up of liberal millennials (and gen z) who don’t particularly like cops. 

when reading a lot of post-war fanfic in 2020, i saw a number of ways people coped with this difficulty in fanfiction. some just completely ignored canon and had him pursue alternative careers. others leaned more into the detective side of law enforcement, solving crimes and investigating like in a 2000s CBS procedural, sort of ignoring the qualms one may have about whether or not all cops are bastards. others still had him turn completely dark, going on murdering sprees, eating donuts and beating people up. 

now, another thing that you probably know about me (and about this fic) if you’ve read this blog before, is that i have the most annoying iteration of what we call, in france, an “esprit de contradiction” (or, contradictory spirit). i am the kid who, in school, read none of the books on the compulsory reading list, but read all the “suggested reading” ones. my natural inclination, when someone tells me to do something, is to do the opposite to prove i can also make it work. so, obviously, having read all of the above, i wanted to do none of the above. and, so, i think another guiding principle i’ve always had for castles is: what hasn’t been done before? like: if i’ve already read ten fics doing harry-the-detective (and doing it rather well),  i don’t feel the need to add my version to that. so, it’s like: where do we go from here? what haven’t i seen? 

and so, i determined that in writing auror!harry in castles, there were two things i wanted to explore. 

1) getting back to realism, i wanted to know what would it mean for harry, in actual fact, to become an auror? what kinds of things he’d have to see, what kind of crimes happen in the wizarding world, what kinds of things he’d have to learn that you wouldn’t really have seen elsewhere? 

to be honest, as a story, i think that for all that i (and some of you) call castles “realistic,” it’s a bit of a shorthand to say that castles is a story that actually exists as a perpetual balance between fictional clichés and realism. it’s not “realistic” because… i’m not a researcher. i’m not here to read all the books and watch all the documentaries about what it’s really like to be a cop. i’m not here to write about it and debunk people’s visions. i think other people do that much better than me. what i (humbly) think i’m quite good at, is taking the cliché version of something (here, what it’s like to be a cop), as well as looking at what people have previously written for auror!harry, and turning that on its head. 

so, for example, i spent most my teens and early twenties being fascinated by legal and police procedurals. like: if it came out in the 00s and talked about lawyers or murder - you name it, i’ve seen it. and obviously, having seen that, i know that as a society, we tend to focus our police fiction on the big stuff: the murders and the human traffickers and the cocaine trades. if you look at most of what’s been written for auror!harry out there, that’s also what you’ll find, and people write it quite well. 

but, to me, turning that on its head is like: okay, but what about the boring stuff? we all know police statistics. we all know that there’s: the traffic offences and the domestics, and the drunks and the petty thefts. so, if you assume that harry would be starting at the bottom of the ladder in the ministry, are those the kinds of things he’d have to deal with? what do those look like, transposed into the HP universe? to me, exploring that isn’t about research or realism per se, it’s more about looking at the issue a different way. again, i don’t care about what it’s actually really like to handle all those smaller issues. what i care about is: what would you, my reader, think about these smaller issues?

to be honest,  i reckon you’d think two things: 

that it’s BORING af

but maybe that the recurring and omnipresent level of low-stakes violence that is informed by the various social and financial pressures in society would get to your morale a bit, if you had to deal with it on a daily basis (yes, in my head, you’re also a socialist). 

and so in castles, that’s why you get scenes like the domestic in chapter four, where harry’s all unsure and lost about what to do when the violence reaches the intimacy of the home, rather than large-scale death eater stuff. it’s also what informs this permeating low but constant state of social exhaustion in act two, with poverty and inflation being a driver for all kinds of crimes that feel endemic and unsolvable. it’s lastly what creates the whole issue around the brixton bombings and the wall that exists between wizards and muggles. what i’m looking at here is: knowing that my character, harry, is an idealist, someone who’s rather black-and-white and also someone who’s not use to more “normal” levels of violence, what does it look like for him to experience that, and what is the opportunity for further character development. how does someone like that fare as a “cop” in that environment, what interests him and what makes him stay? 

additionally, 2), another thing that i’ve always been very interested in exploring, and that i thought would be interesting to relate to re:auror!harry, is that: in canon, harry’s actually someone who’s quite… violent. this is something that is a bit glossed over under the guise of “well, they’re mean and they deserved it” but for years, violence is pretty much his only means of conflict-resolution. sometimes, the violence is verbal (we see him lashing out in anger at ron and hermione on multiple occasions), but oftentimes, it’s physical. in seven years, canon harry ends up more duels and fights that i can physically count. 

now, obviously, there are explanations for this behaviour (his upbringing, the violence that is also directed at him, etc.) but there’s this duality in his character that i’ve always found fascinating. he’s very principled. he prefers expelliarmus. he doesn’t want to hurt people. he feels awful when he crosses the line with malfoy in sixth year and almost kills him. but then, he feels no remorse about umbridge and the centaurs, about marietta edgecombe, or even about dudley. when he threatens mundungus during DH, ron and hermione are a bit taken aback, but he doesn’t hesitate. he hates that sirius is being fed to dementors when he knows sirius is innocent. before that? the more violent and ruthless the punishment, the better. and lastly, when it comes to the prophecy, he worries about his technical abilities in defeating voldemort, who is a highly skilled wizard, but he very much doesn’t mind the ethical fact that he’s going to have to kill someone. and, i personally believe (though this is arguable) that when he casts expelliarmus against tom riddle at the end, he intends it to kill.  

and so, i think: when you look at this canon violence, there are two ways you can handle it, narratively, if you want to assume character growth. either, you write a story in which harry goes to therapy, realises that he’s violent, feels bad, makes amends and all’s well that ends well; or, you write a story in which he reckons with his violent side but doesn’t disavow it. instead, he learns to… use it? lean into when he needs to? and, yes, it’s a bit morally murky and uncomfortable but i also think it fits in quite well with the idea of him becoming a wizard cop. because, whilst i don’t actually think all cops are bastards, i do think that in order to join the police force, you need to believe that violence (especially if it’s controlled and state-sponsored) is sometimes morally right and justified. and, as someone who personally very much struggles with this concept, that’s what i chose to write about. 

which, at long last, leads us to avada kedavra. because, if you combine items 1) and 2), meaning the vision we have of cops in our collective imagination and harry’s violent tendencies, you logically get to one hard fact: cops kill people. and thus, what does it look like when harry, as part of the wizarding state, has to kill people? 

now, as a caveat, i want to state that no, all cops do not kill people. especially in europe (where the story is set), the instances of that level of violence exercised by law enforcement are incredibly rare (though, they are becoming more and more frequent, but that’s a different issue). that said, again, i’m not looking for realism here, i’m looking to exploit the vision we have of cops and confront harry to it, which is why the concept of harry casting avada is a thing in castles. i also think that it’s safe to assume that in a post-war society where poverty is on the rise and crime is rampant and endemic, the levels of violence in wizarding society would be more important than in current western europe. so, is there a realistic take you could write on the aurors where harry never has to kill anyone? sure. especially with magic, you could take the view that often, a neutralising spell like petrificus totalus would be enough. but, that just wasn’t the reality i wanted to write about. 

i will also caveat the below by saying that there’s a massive “peer pressure” element to violence in law enforcement. a lot of the violence we see is institutional, meaning that it resides in the overall culture of police forces, who either turn a blind eye or actively encourage such behaviour. whilst that is present in castles, it’s not heavily touched on. the first reason for that is that i am a one-woman enterprise and cannot possibly touch on everything (lol), and the second is that i think harry as a person is someone who is quite immune to peer pressure. he’s not going to open fire just because “it’s the culture”. i do think it might become more of a thing for him to be concerned about once he reaches higher levels of management and has more of a big-picture, institutional view of how aurors behave, but again, he is not always super wary of institutional violence if it targets actual criminals. he also has good relations with his coworkers, which encourages him to “side” with them when something goes wrong. a little bit like his father taunting snape, he doesn’t always want to believe that people he likes can do what he perceives as bad things. 

having said all of this, on the AK scene in particular (yes, i am finally getting there), the thing to note is that it does not exist independently.

it’s part - again - of this much broader arc on harry and his relationship to violence, particularly used as a punishment. it’s an arc that starts with the early reckonings he has in chapters 1-4 about cruciating amycus carrow and killing tom, which then evolves into giulia basically telling him that he can’t fix the past and it’s okay if he’s done shit things as part of fighting in a war (another massive question in castles being on the violence we are all capable of when placed in exceptional circumstances). this then becomes the AK scene in training, which then turns into the AK scene IRL, after giulia dies, which then raises questions about state violence and imprisonment with umbridge and the malfoys, and the ruthlessness of his actions against alecto carrow. later, it morphs into this reflection on him accepting his more ruthless tendencies and choosing to become a hit wizard in order to do something productive with them, and… well, you’ll have to wait for chapter 18 (and beyond) to find out the rest! to the very end of this fic, this is one of the big character ‘journeys’ that we have embarked on and it is obviously very layered. 

and, to me, i see the AK training scene as perhaps the first time where harry truly starts to consciously reckon with this intrinsic potential for violence he has, and the first time where he actually sort of… exploits it. when you see him in canon with mundungus or amycus carrow, they’re all very spur-of-moment instances of violence, which sort of overpower him and he reacts instinctively. he may later question them and feel uneasy about them (see malfoy in sixth year), but that’s later. the AK scene in castles is the first time where he’s being asked to trigger that violence on purpose. and, obviously, that’s going to be hard. first, because of his morals and this question of right-and-wrong, but also because he’s a victim of it. he’s a very clear victim of this violence, of this particular spell, which has not only traumatised him and killed him, but also killed his parents (and other people he loves). 

so, i knew this scene was going to be big. i knew it was going to be important in terms of character development, especially knowing where else i wanted to take this journey. and i wanted it to be part of the training programme because:

i reckon realistically, if you accept that aurors do engage in state-sponsored violence and that they do use avada kedavra, that would totally be a thing they’d need to learn in training

i needed him to “learn” to cast it because at this point, i already knew giulia was going to die and that he was going to cast it in the line of duty, that that was going to be part of the ‘journey,’ and i needed to build up to that moment. i didn’t want the first instance of him casting avada to be after giulia’s death because i don’t think it would have felt “earned” as part of his character development. 

lastly, there is an aspect of auror training, thus far, that harry’s been finding very “safe” at this stage in the story. he says in chapter four: It’s a strange thing, too: being in a classroom again. Being able to make mistakes that won’t cost anyone else’s life. and, so, it was time to make him a bit uncomfortable again, you know?

and, because i wanted it to feel “earned” and be a “slow build”, i naturally gravitated towards this low-key sort of build up where harry knows what’s coming, and the reader kind of guesses what’s coming, but no one outright says the words avada kedavra until the end. i wanted it to be a bit spooky. i wanted it to be disturbing. i wanted it to feel weird and strangely procedural and methodical, for something that is, actually, to harry, incredibly hard and emotional. to be strong because this is very difficult for him, with this sense of having to reckon with something that is inevitable, that you don’t like, but that you also know is necessary. in my head, it’s a little bit reminiscent to that walk into the forest where he knows he’s going to die but has to do it anyway. it’s a very “harry” scene, in that way. 

.

and, so, because of all of the above, it ended up looking like this:

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In the end, the whole scheduling predicament is (somewhat) resolved over the first week of December, which brings the 'kids' to their last lesson with Robards to Monday, the 7th. That day, Harry sits at the back of the class. Ron barely mutters a ‘Hello,’ when he sits next to him. This confirms Harry's intuition that Hermione also had him look at the curriculum in advance.

now that you know the background to this, i think you can see how this part is already building the “dread” element to this. harry’s got this mood: alright, let’s just get through this. he sits at the back of the class cause he knows people will be staring, and he doesn’t like the attention. ron is probably nervous both for himself (he’s seen his bets mate die, all that) and for harry (like, is he gonna flip? how is he going to react?). hermione’s probably been fretting for months, she probably thought it was the right thing to warn them, probably tried to talk to harry, being like: are you sure you wanna do this? you could probably ask for an exemption, especially considering his post-war mental state is fragile. but, 1) he doesn’t want to be treated differently, and 2) as i said above, i do think he feels a bit curious and attracted to the violence, actually. enough to want to be there, although he’d never outright say it.  

This last module spreads over a full day - a theory lecture in the morning, followed by a four-hour practice slot at the spell-casting range in the afternoon. 

i remember re-writing this line twenty times trying to say this. it’s the boring scheduling admin parts that i never know how to convey. 

Over the past few weeks, Harry’s learnt that there are spells that they have to learn to resist (Imperio), spells that they are simply never authorised to cast (Crucio), and spells that they just can’t practise on each other without running the risk of inflicting serious, bodily harm. This obviously falls into the last category.

again, building up and trusting the reader to understand without actually having the narrator saying the name, because he doesn’t feel ready to. 

Sometimes, it’s silly stuff - setting fire to mountains of crap, controlling and increasing the power of the flames at will. Sometimes, it’s inflicting pretty unfortunate injuries to rats. Once, Parvati boldly asked why they didn't just fire them at dummies and Robards simply glared at her and snapped back - ‘You really think that would teach you anything?’ Harry almost countered him on principle, but Ron sent him a memorable warning look like the fate of lab rats wasn't one particularly worth getting fired over. Perhaps, it is a sign that he’s grown into an adult, now, that Harry reluctantly let that one slide.

again, this is a) hinting to the reader what we’re talking about and b) establishing the lab rats thing that will become important later, because this is a killing curse, and thus, for effect and important, i wanted it to kill something. robards’ kind of right, there, it’s not the same when you fire at a dummy. and, also, it builds into the wizarding world’s institutional lack of consideration for beasts and other beings that aren’t wizards. 

For their last lecture, Robards writes two words with his wand, in capital letters, onto the blackboard, and Harry stares straight ahead, motionless, because he can tell the man’s gaze is on him. Scratch that, everyone's gaze is on him. And what honestly feels strange, that morning, above all else, is that there even is a theory to the spell, something to be learnt. It hadn't even occurred to him. 

by this point, i think as a reader you’re kind of like: god, it can’t be that can it? oh yeah, god, it is that. again, it’s this sense of dread and realisation, and then the suspense created of: how on earth is he gonna deal?? especially because everyone is looking at him and i reckon you really feel for him, in that moment. 

‘It’s a bit like a Patronus charm,’ Robards starts. The comparison makes Harry nauseous. ‘Except, instead of hope and happy memories, you summon fury, or hate. All the anger you can come up with is welcome, here, ladies and gents.’

i’ve had loads of comments on this comparison, which is chilling. it just sort of came to me. i have no explanation for this, it just felt sort of obvious.

Of course, they go over very the strict conditions upon which the spell can be cast - an immediate risk to your life or the life of others - other methods of restraining the individual have been materially attempted, to no avail - fleeing or retreating through Disapparition or any other means is either unsafe, or impossible

funny story: getting those bullet points to show up on AO3... almost as impossible as getting them to show up on tumblr lol. i considered putting them in a sentence but i wanted it to physically look like class notes. and, also more recently, you’ll know that those are… flexible. like, they apply to certain aurors but not the hit wizards. a ministry of magic classic. and when harry totally breaks them in the next chapter, it’s all sirens and shite and no one cares, right?

Harry kind of listens but also kind of doesn’t, like the whole lesson happens behind one, big cloud of smoke.

this sentence is stating the obvious, but i do like it.  

At the range that afternoon, he finds that can’t take his eyes off the rat. They always use two 'sets.' An enlarged rat to practice the spell itself, first, then a bunch of tiny ones that magically appear out of thin air, running around in an enclosure, to practice their aim. So, this is it, Harry thinks, staring as his assigned rat. It stands there, looks back at him, bound to a table, about eighty feet away. There’s something in its gaze that Harry can’t quite shake off, like it already knows what’s coming to him. He loosely wonders if the rat is actually a thing transfigured into an animal or if the little guy had little rat parents, once upon a time, siblings or – God forbid – rat children. You’re being ridiculous, get a fucking grip.

this paragraph is: part admin i rewrote fifteen times to make that rat-explanation sentence sound less cumbersome to read (lol) and part this thing that i love to do where harry’s just randomly thinking stuff in his head while telling himself he’s fine and he clearly isn’t.

In fairness to her, Opal is the bravest of them all. She’s first to actually say the words. In the silence, there’s almost an apologetic tone to her spell, though, and her wand produces absolutely nothing.

i could write an entire book about opal and my vision for her which never saw the light of day in castles, but this post is already too long. just like castles itself lol. 

‘All right!’ Robards bellows out from behind them, walking up and down the range. ‘Now, the lady’s shown us all where it’s at, will you lot stop fucking about and get on with it? We don’t have a whole month, here!’

as we now know, robards is … a little bit more complicated as a character than some of his early appearances suggest. i think he’s just being tough because he doesn’t know how else to handle this. he’s never had to train a class of traumatised eighteen year olds who don’t know wtf they’re doing but who desperately want to help. like, i think what transpires in this scene is that it’s not just harry who’s traumatised by AK. they’ve all seen people die in the battle. a lot of them were tortured in hogwarts. and, most importantly, it’s awkward because harry's there and he’s their friend and they’re all wondering how he is going to react if they cast it. which is also why opal goes for it first, imo, it’s because she’s the only one who doesn’t have that past with him. and, i think robards is like: well, we have to do this anyway so let’s see how he fares and we’ll cross whatever bridge needs to be crossed when we get to it.  robards also has this sort of old guard cop language where he calls women “ladies” and the trainees “kids.” he’s just - old, you know? i don’t think he means it badly. and, on the “kids” thing, there’s also this recurring theme in early castles chapters of being young in a new job where you’re not taken seriously by older people, just on the basis of age. which is definitely very robards. 

This does seem to shake most of the trainees around Harry into action. Perhaps, it's easier that way. At least, it’s a hubbub of voices shouting stuff, rather than just one, very distinct spell. In his head, he cuts the noise out, focuses on his rat. It's nothing like Wormtail, and yet everything like Wormtail, which just makes the whole thing worse. 

yeah, i remember i had the idea for the rats before i realised the comparison you could draw with wormtail. and then it just hit me in the face when i was editing and i was like: wow. 

Robards goes around the room, Harry vaguely notes, correcting posture and shouting instructions at people over the tumult; Harry notices that he purposely avoids his booth, going from the person to his right to the person to his left. He supposes that since he’s probably the only one who hasn’t uttered a word since they came in (has Ron? he wonders), there’s not much to be said.

lol, obviously not. robards is just leaving him alone and giving him time. our boy can sometimes be a bit dim. 

Interestingly, the first to actually produce something of substance is Seamus. His booth is right next to Harry’s and suddenly, there’s a flash of something green and a loud, ‘Fecking hell!’ Harry figures that Seamus must have dropped his wand in surprise because his spell adopts an odd upwards curve and hits the ceiling. ‘Oh, fantastic, Finnegan! Great one!’ Robards’ voice echoes from somewhere far in the fog that seems to surround Harry’s brain but all that he knows, right now, is that he needs to get out of there.

there are a lot of things in this very tiny paragraph. first, seamus being the first one to get the spell out. this ties into his character in the fault in faulty manufacturing (which i’d already started to think about when i first wrote this) and the hatred he is able to summon. if you’ve read the fault, you know.  second, there’s robards saying ‘great one!’ although the spell went completely the wrong way, which is another early hint that robards is actually a pretty good trainer and not a complete dick. and third, there’s harry running away in a panic while, predictable, is just very heartbreaking. 

Shoves his wand into his back pocket and practically runs out the door. It’s only then, safe, between the white walls of an empty Ministry corridor that Harry realises that his hands are shaking. That his legs are shaking, knees threatening to give out, breaths coming out staggered and ragged, heart racing and pumping adrenaline through his veins, and fuck, he hasn’t had one of those in a while. 

i used to not quite like this moment because i always felt like i hadn’t laid enough groundwork in the early chapters for him to be able to sort of identify a panic attack (although he doesn’t name it) and have coping skills, but i have since edited the early chapters and fixed it. 

Suddenly, he closes his eyes and all he can see is Tom. Not Voldemort, just Tom. Handsome and sixteen, and the moss of the forest underneath his fingertips, and – Breathe, a voice whispers, in his head. It sounds like wind in the trees and last summer. Breathe. In and out, and in, and out. Slow, Harry, breathe.

that’s obviously ginny. and, because they’re broken up, then, it’s significant. 

It’s a good ten minutes before the panic truly recedes. By then, Ron’s also come out, sat next to him and said nothing. He sets his jaw, feels his body tense next to his. ‘I can’t get it out either,’ Ron says. ‘Yeah?’ Harry snaps back. His breaths are still coming out short. ‘Why the fuck not?’ He's being mean. Should know better, by now, than to slip into another one of those you-don't-know-what-it's-like-to-be-me arguments, and he's never known what it was like to be Ron, either. He makes a ball of his fist to keep his hands from shaking. ‘It's a spell,’ he adds. Wants to get up, leave. A beach and an ocean far away. All Ron has ever needed is confidence. ‘You've always been a much better wizard than you think,’ Harry stresses.  A beat passes; Ron says nothing. Then, he looks up to the wall in front of them. ‘Physically, yeah, but -’ ‘No,’ Harry shakes his head again, stronger this time. Shut up, he thinks. And, maybe, fuck you, it's easier for you. There's an uncharitable thought again. ‘That's all it is,’ he quickly corrects. ‘It's physical.’ The words ground him. This is better. ‘Your heart beats, then it stops.’ And so, it is physics – only physics – that he has nightmares about. Could have been as simple as formulas that calculate the speed at which the Earth rotates. ‘They’re right, though,’ he adds. Tries to think rationally, like Hermione. Ron usually lets himself get convinced by Hermione. ‘Being able to get it out, out there, it could save loads of people.’ ‘Harry -’ ‘I’m fine,’ he says. He is. ‘And, I do think that. Really.’ Because, truth be told, while he did cast Expelliarmus at Voldemort back in May, Harry also knows he'd have done anything, if it’d been needed to save his best mate. Or, for that matter, save anybody else. He laughs when Ron asks, ‘Do you want to go back in?’ ‘Maybe “want”’s a strong word.’

see, i wanted to comment, but i didn’t want to interrupt them. i’ve written a number of versions of this scene, but i think i’ve finally landed on the version i’m happiest with. i think it’s both harry and ron knowing each other so well, both of them being a bit distressed, and still trying to be a good friend. they’re both trying to put each other first. with ron trying to share things so that harry opens up, and harry sort of reassuring him that he’s okay, and also that he’s capable of doing it, too. i also want to comment on these two sentences: it is physics – only physics – that he has nightmares about. Could have been as simple as formulas that calculate the speed at which the Earth rotates. which i’ve always adored. it’s not only harry minimising his trauma in the first sentence, in order to reassure ron. it’s also minimising in the second because tbh, formulas that calculate the speed at which the Earth rotates are actually not super simple either, you know? and, of course, there’s dark humour too, at the end, because it’s these two.

Eventually, they do re-enter the room, the two of them. The moment the door opens, the place goes dead quiet. People always think they're being subtle when they're talking behind your back. All of their looks are on Harry, pretending not to stare as he walks back up to his booth but this time, he barely notices them. Sometimes, he just needs to be who he is.

this is a bit bigger than this specific scene, obviously. chapter 5 is also the chapter where harry comes “out” and starts talking to the press and telling his side of the story as well, and growing into the skin of the famous “boy who lived”, so it obviously feeds into this. 

And, now, that's an Auror. He's going to save lives. And have to end some, too. He looks at the rat and breathes. In, out. His hands are steady. He mutters, ‘I’m so sorry.’

it’s the ‘im so sorry,’ that breaks by heart every time i read this. it’s so harry. he doesn’t want to do this. to kill this rat, especially this innocent rat. but, he’s got to. 

Shuts his eyes. Opens them. In his head, Tom Riddle murders the mother who called him brave. ‘Avada Kedavra,’ he just says.

i know, i know. i’m not even gonna comment on this again. it’s the castles quote that you all love. don’t worry, i love it too. although i sometimes think it’s a bit too in-your-face, i almost deleted it before publishing the chapter because of that, and now it’s weird to think about because it’s one of those quotes that people always quote back to me. as to how i thought of it? idk. as i said before, there’s loads of element in this scene that are very reminiscent of the forest, and so that just came to me. and obviously, i had this whole idea of how when harry casts avada kedavra (and the reason he’s so “good” at it) is that he’s done it before, when he “was” tom. and it was just… the way i found to signify that.   one thing that i will note, though, is that i’ve always loved the “just” in “he just says”. i think it’s one of those instances where it’s not just filler. it’s the contrast of that “just” and the sheer magnitude of what comes before it. 

There is a flash of green light and the rat falls dead. The target table turns and three more rats appear, running around it. Harry’s aim has always been on point so really, once he’s mastered the spell, that part’s not really a challenge. ‘Avada Kedavra,’ he repeats and this time, his father falls, wandless, at the bottom of the stairs. It’s seconds before the rats all lie dead.

again. just, the ruthless instincts in this, correlated with the obvious pain and violence of the scene. i am noticing that it’s literally not his father that falls “dead”, it’s the rats. i don’t think that was intentional but i feel like it’s the kind of wording that people who write meta could write articles about lol. 

(Later, people tell him that he’s the first trainee in history to ever master the spell on first try, to ever kill all four rats in under thirty seconds with a methodology and focus that rivals that of Tom Riddle himself. He’s not sure what to make of that.)

yeah… that. lol.  

Robards materialises behind him, as though he'd actually been there the whole time, waiting. 

lol, that’s because he was. he cares. 

Faded blue eyes set on the dead rats. All the noise around them is muted; Harry hears the Head Auror inhale, exhale, like steps echoing against the marble floors of an empty cathedral. He waves his wand; the rats vanish.  'Alright, Potter,' Robards breathes out. 'I heard you're a good teacher. Go and help the others.'  Harry pockets his wand and nods.

and again, this is my boy robards doing just the right thing. the aftercare harry actually needs. people not making a fuss about him, and getting to help others. robards for the win!

[wellthatwasaletdown]

He's the most marketable. // only if by the most marketable you mean was prepared to do anything he was told. That’s the reason he was ear marked as a potential solo star. He had the least vocal training, which you can tell from his audition, he was terrified of performing live, he preferred partying to working or improving himself, he performs poorly in interviews and he also isn’t very talented as a songwriter or musician. However he did have curls and dimples and was prepared to go along with anything he was asked to do (including larrybaiting).

Every single member of 1D has some flaws as an artist. Harry probably had the most. I think they have had to work really hard over the years to hide them. But he did have that one redeeming feature.

Marketability has absolutely nothing to do with talent.

That was the whole concept behind the show The Voice. It was to take the bias out of the selection process and have the judges pick the contestant solely on talent at first.

When he auditioned for X Factor, Harry Edward Styles was a record company's dream: young, conventionally attractive, charming. They knew that they could sell him to teenage girls. The fact that he could sing was a bonus.

[flodaya]

What did he say about gay sex? And would you elaborate on his case? I’m so torn and I’d love your opinion on his “queer baiting or not” issue cause I keep seeing arguments from both sides that I very well understand

rather homophobic rhetoric implying gay sex scenes are inherently not tender

anyway, on the more general issue

“Queerbaiting” is the concept of marketing and implying a queer romance to gain a queer audience but in order to not alienate homophobic conservative viewers they never actually make the queer relationship/character explicitly queer, supernatural is a prime example because they’ve very clearly implied more than platonic bond between dean and cas on multiple occasions but they also have a huge conversation (gun obsessed) viewership they didn’t want to sacrifice so we ended up with the infamous turbo hell ending*

I still think no real person, no matter how famous, owes us a label or a coming out or any true detail about their private life for that matter so someone’s personal identity isn’t a marketing strategy, just because they choose to not disclose it doesn’t mean they are queerbaiting, they don’t owe us anything, someone not using a label is not a marketing strategy but rather they’re right for privacy

but in harry style’s case I can’t help but start to question if his identity is a very clear marketing strategy, his newest interview very much reads like “playing both sides” and while I still believe he doesn’t owe his fans or anyone else a label I’m starting to feel like he’s using a lot of queer aesthetic and leaning into the vagueness and speculation around his sexuality to attract a queer audience while not at all understanding actual queer identities, he is trying to stay as undefinable as possible while making straight up homophobic statements like (paraphrasing) “gay sex in movies isn’t tender”

additionally, denying his current relationship with a woman just to (maybe accidentally) give his insane larries even more fuel did not only make me upset on behalf of the woman who is constantly being harassed by his fans but also to me feels like once again trying to give his queer audience enough to imply he is queer while still keeping plausible deniability

to me it feels like he is marketing himself as queer, it’s starting to seem less like people are assuming something about his sexuality but rather him encouraging the speculation which to me is marketing so it is queerbaiting

and again, i don’t think he owes us a label, I’m just saying in this instance it feels like he is stringing along a queer audience who hope that he will one day explicitly say he is queer

*i want to make clear I personally have not watched more than 3 episodes of spn but I’ve been on tumblr since 2012 so I know