#he falls in love with you and writes you a letter confessing. and then resigns from THE RESTAURANT HE OWNS (?!) and runs away

[hideyseek]

what. ? !

[khunyuki]

"I've lived my life with blade and you always in my mind"

ᴍᴀɪɴ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ: 2.𝙸'𝚕𝚕 𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑 you mean to me

Synopsis: Soshiro, who didn't notice just how much pressure Kagami was experiencing, felt extremely guilty. He thought he's been expressing his love for her clearly but it seems like it wasn't enough. So he better make sure his beloved fiancee will understand it all night long.

Pairing/s: Soshiro Hoshina x Fiancee!OC

Notes: This is the very first smut i've ever done in my entire writing career so please do enjoy you horny ppl. I already immediately apologize if it's inadequate cuz I don't usually write this genre huhu. ALWAYS ASK FOR CONSENT GUYSSS🫶

Warning/s: Minors below 18+ is NOT allowed,

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, NSFW

Masterlist: TOC, Previous, Next

↓↓↓ PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK AS THIS CONTAINS EXPLICIT CONTENT ↓↓↓

"Why don't we go somewhere else first. So you can do it comfortably?"

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This wasn't the first time Kagami visited her fiance's apartment. It was a 2 bedroom with a kitchen, living room, and bathroom apartment that is wide yet cozy enough for the two of them. She remember helping him choose among other options until he picked this particular place, saying that it would fit the two of them perfectly and he was right.

She sat down the sofa in the living room after removing her sandals and his jacket while he immediately went to the kitchen to get some refreshments. It wasn't often that she come here despite having a duplicate key to the place but she could still see the things she left behind during her visits, decorating his place. It fills her with warmth to see him have a special place for her things and the thought of how domestic it was. To her, his apartment felt more like home than the household she's been brought up.

He handed her a glass of water before sitting to which she gladly drank as it reminded her of how parched her throat was. On his other hand was a cold compress for her bruised cheek that she had long forgotten about. He placed her in his arms so casually yet making sure she was comfortable with it. His right hand keeping the compress in place as the other was playing with her hair as they relaxed in each other's arms.

To be honest, she'd fall asleep at that moment with how safe and protected he made her feel. It was late and they could still talk about it tomorrow but she might lose her courage if she didn't talk now.

And so, she began to tell him everything. She started with her insecurities about herself, her struggles at not being able to keep up with expectations, how her family uses it against her, how they kept forcing her to quit work to get married and bear an heir, how she actually did give in her resignation letter but was rejected, to the what happened earlier this day when their engagement was almost cancelled.

Soshiro just listened and let her talk. All this time, his fiancee was struggling yet he never really did anything to help her with it before making him angry at himself. He felt guilty because she would always listen to his problems yet he just let her keep all of this to herself. He would clench his jaw in anger at her family whenever she vaguely mentions the punishments and the treatment they gave to her. He knew she was still keeping things to herself despite saying she'll tell him everything, he just didn't know the extent of it. Perhaps she keeps it to herself as she knew just how he'll storm in their residence to give them a taste of their own medicine once he learns about it, with how she squeezes his hands during the times he felt pissed off. Most of all, he just felt guilty.

He could hear it in her voice just how lonely it was for her to endure it all alone. While she may not be blaming him, he sure was blaming himself. He should've been braver and more straightforward when it comes to confessing his feelings. Because he could correlate everything to each other, how her emotions, her family's actions, and his response significantly affects her entire well-being.

He hates how she doesn't cry from the treatment she receives from her family but she cried when they told her to leave him. He hates how she cried when he told her he loves her as if his words were her whole world. He hates how she couldn't be happy and how she thinks that calling herself failure is a normal. He hates how she could be content with just him. He hates how he's one of the root causes of her problems.

When she could be happy and have all of the great things in the world. When he would gladly give her what she wants and punish those who hurt her. He wants her not to be content with the crumbs of affection she gets for she deserved even more than that. He just want her to think of herself first and foremost. Her wants her to love herself and think of her happiness rather than anyone else's as nothing will be able to take it away from her. He won't let anyone take anymore from her.

Hoshina Soshiro doesn't know what to do to help her and he hates it.

.

.

"So yeah... That's all of it"

Kagami ended her speech in a casual tone, contrasting the heavy contents she just told. She felt lighter now that she told him but her heart sank when she saw how grave his expression was. She took away the compress he was holding that was unfortunately the poor victim of his irritation and placed it on the table.

"Everything I told you, don't blame yourself. It's not your fault"

She faced him and placed her forehead onto his, closing her eyes with a mellow smile. He hates how even after all of that she's the one comforting him instead the other way around.

"I didn't tell you about this because I wanted you to be my therapist. I just want you to know what to expect if you still... want to be with me. I have a lot of problems and I never want to burden you with it. This engagement was something our families have decided and it's perfectly fine if you chose not to continue with it. It was just my selfishness that made me do this because I want to stay by your side... but if you want to leave then I... "

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↓↓↓ PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK AS THIS CONTAINS EXPLICIT CONTENT ↓↓↓

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"I love you"

Soshiro said it firmly before kissing her on the lips. He put her in his lap, wrapping an arm on her waist and the other firmly on the back of her head. He kissed her with such passion as if to show just how much he loves her. Kagami was so surprised by his sudden action yet she still wrapped her arms around his neck and responded with the same amount of passion.

Soshiro slipped his tongue in her mouth and explored every nook and corner, battling with her own tongue and mixing their salivas. Kagami struggled to breathe at the intimacy and could feel herself getting weaker, letting him to do what he wants. She couldn't even move an inch since his hand was firmly placed on the back of her head.

She was feeling lightheaded with every second that passes by before he finally retreated to stare at her. The trail of saliva that hang between their tongue made her flustered as she recalled what they just did. She couldn't find any words as she gazed at him with a dazed expression.

"You're always so kind"

He moved his hands to her cheeks and kissed her forehead tenderly.

"So thoughtful"

Her right eye.

"So considerate of others"

Her left eye.

"So hardworking"

Her left cheek.

"And brave"

Her nose.

"You're always so understanding"

Her right cheek.

"So unselfish"

Her jaw.

"Yet so lovely"

Her chin.

"You're so beautiful"

He looked at her straight in the eye, his red eyes staring deep into her soul and pecked her lips. So tender, so gentle, in contrast to his passionate kiss from earlier.

His compliments are things he always says to her yet hearing it being said so lovingly like he was ingraining those words into her makes her so full. She couldn't stop her emotions as they fell down her eyes. His fingers wiping the tears away.

He leaned down once more and kissed her. This time it was slow and steady as he gently guided her body down the sofa. He trailed down her lips to her neck, his breath tickling her skin eliciting a sigh. His hands that had no longer to go reached for her own, interlocking their fingers.

"S-soshiro~"

His lips sucking and nipping on the skin leaving light marks. She couldn't help but call out his name as he keeps on doing so all over her neck. Her sense of touch has always been one of her most sensitive senses along her hearing so the combo of his gentle kisses, occasional licks and deliberate sucking was far too much. She couldn't keep gasps and moans nor could she keep her body from squirming under his touch.

The kimono she was wearing was loosening from all her squirming thus exposing her collarbones and the skin beneath it. The sight was enough to make Soshiro go crazy, as if her moans weren't taking a toll on his self control already. But not yet... He still has to shown her how precious she is...

He stopped his actions and looked her in the eyes to ask for consent. Giving her words of affirmations and comfort as he does.

"I can't even begin to know just how much pain and sadness you must've felt this whole time nor do I know what I can do to help you. But I promise to always stay by your side and be there when you need me."

"I want to show you just how precious you are... Will you let me?"

Touched by his affection and consideration, Kagami nodded her head. She may not believe in herself but she believes in his words. If it's him then she's fine with anything.

"Yes... I'm all yours"

She reached out to his head and brought them together in a kiss. He picked her up in his arms while maintaining contact and brought her to his bed. He only broke contact to place her gently on the bed, then topping her dazzled form.

"I love you, Kagami"

"I love you too, Soshiro"

He placed one more kiss on her lips then proceeded to untie the sash of her kimono. The hold that her clothes had on her body loosened and became non-existent as he threw the sash on the ground. There she was in her naked glory looking at him with eyes filled with innocence yet her body filled with seduction. He couldn't help but stare at the milky white skin that seemed to have never been touched by sunlight, riddled with faded scars from battle wounds and her past. He stopped himself from once again feeling the bubbling anger towards her family to focus on her only.

She tried cover herself after seeing the slight hesitance in his eyes but he stopped her from doing so.

"You're gorgeous"

Flustered from the new compliment, she stopped struggling but continues to squirm under his intense gaze. His red eyes seemingly memorizing her body in evey nooks and crannies. He looked at her mounds that weren't small nor big, just the perfect size for her physique. Her stomach that was so flat and sexy he couldn't help but caress it. He could see the abs hidden by her sleeper build whenever her muscles would tense and he couldn't help but trace it. Then down that was her womb covered by her purple underwear that was soaked wet from her continuous arousal. He couldn't help but lick his lips at how sexy it looked, feeling his own throbbing hard.

Her womb and stomach. If they were to have a baby then those two would be the most obvious place for it. He imagines her belly being swollen from the child they'll produce once he gives her his sperm. He traces that area, purposely slipping his fingers in the underwear and grazing her clit earning a gasp from her. Her thighs pressed so close to each other, he wanted to pry it open and...

"Soshiro, please stop staring already"

She looks so pretty and so sexy that he wonders how he got so lucky to have her. He wanted to touch her immediately, to make love and have babies but not yet. It's not the time yet.

"Tell me, Kagami. What do you want me to do?"

He leaned down to her ear and asked in a whisper. A wide smirk in his face at seeing the blood rush to it. She looked at him with a pout, her face filled with desperation due to his teasings. She bit her lips in hesitance.

"Please"

"Hmm?"

He mused, continuing to move his hands up and down her stomach, purposely grazing her breast with one while the other the place between her thighs.

"Please, Soshiro"

She gripped on his arm, pleading with her eyes. It was glistening from all the yearning and lust and he couldn't help but be captivated by it. He bit his own lips as he tried to resist but she makes it so hard for him to do so. Giving in, he once again devoured her lips participating in a battle of tongues. Then he moved down, licking and kissing her jaw to her neck then to her collarbones, kissing it and sucking on it. Both his hands now touching her breasts, squeezing it basking in how soft it was, with his finger pinching her nipples. His clothed knee finding its way between her legs and separating them as he presses it against her heat, grinding against it.

Kagami was a blubbering mess from how overstimulated she was. She's too sensitive to his touch, reacting to every little detail that she felt like her brain was a mush. She kept on calling out his name, moaning and gasping so desperately that he wonders how she'd react once they finally did it.

He traced a line with his tongue to the area between her breast after he finished placing hickeys on her collar. He kept on marking his way until he reached the peak of her left mound. With bated breath, he placed it in his mouth, sucking like a baby. His free hand now stroking her sides.

Kagami's eyes widened as she felt the soft, warm muscle on the bundle of nerves on her chest. As he kept on sucking on her nipple, biting it and circling around it after with his other hand massaging and pinching her abused nipple. The pleasure was too much as he keeps on stimulating her other areas that she could feel the knot of her stomach starting to come undone.

"So-ahh-shiro~ There's.. There's something coming out ahhh~ stop~"

When Soshiro heard that, he didn't stop but rather became more aggressive, his free hand foregoing her sides to touch the little bundle of nerves down there. He pressed on her clothed clit and circled around it with his thumb in a fast motion. That addition fastened the process to which she came with a loud moan. He stopped what he's doing to give her some time to rest and seeing her wasted expression boosted his ego. She was still recovering from her high, panting hard when he said...

"We're not done yet"

She glanced down at him to see him place wet kisses on her stomach. She didn't notice it before but he was clearly touching and kissing on her scars tenderly. Even though it was already fading he still chooses to pay attention to it and that gave her butterflies. But as he went down a bit more, she gulped.

He was in between her legs placing a soft kiss on the hem of her underwear then leaning back to observe the soaked spot. Earlier, it was just a small spot but now it was soaked after cumming for the first time. He placed a little kiss on her clothed heat, specifically where it was soaked before proceeding to remove her panties. As soon as he saw it, he let out a gasp like a child finding a new favorite toy, she could see the excitement on his face. She hurriedly tried to close it but her body was still weak from all of that pleasure that she couldn't fight back from his hands.

His grip on her thighs was strong as he bit and sucked on her inner slowly going down again. Getting nearer and nearer her unclothed heat this time. His tongue giving it a long lick starting from her hole to her clit. He sat back up to show her his expression as he savored her juices, licking his lips at the end.

"Yum~"

He gave her a final smirk before burying himself down there once again, this time shamelessly lapping up all the juices she's producing. Her heart was beating so fast from embarrassment at his eagerness and teasing but she couldn't do anything as her body trembled from the pleasure. Her voice music to his ears knowing that he was the cause of this symphony. The nectar she was producing was so addicting that he couldn't help but come back for more. He needed more so he removed his hands from her thighs to let it rub her clit and the other place a finger in her hole.

She gasped at the unfamiliar sensation inside her, how his finger moved around in whatever motions trying to find something. He pumped it inside out slowly to gauge out her reactions. Glancing back at her face, he could see just how much his actions were affecting her so he went back in to further pleasure her. He just wanted to give her so much love y'know.

He added another finger, scissoring inside and curling making her moan even louder. His tongue joining in despite how tight it was getting. Of course he never forgot her bundle of joy. He is taking his sweet time as he wanted to find that sweet spot, the spot would elicit an even louder moan. He pumped in and out maintaining a pace moving it around until he finally finds that gummy area. He inserted another finger and went faster, hitting that same spot over and over again. Partnered with her clit being tortured by the fast paced circling and rubbing, it didn't take long for her to come again. She clenched his hair and almost strangled him with her thighs yet he still didn't stop as he rode her high.

"Too much! It's too much!"

She could feel her hips trembling so hard yet he hasn't stopped at all, maintaining that fast paced pumping and wriggling, his thumb abusing her clit even further and his tongue lapping up everything.

She was seeing stars from the overstimulation, her eyes going to the back of her head as she kept of moaning, no longer able to form coherent sentences. She could feel another wave coming down, tilting her head back and arching her back, she released again.

Finally giving her mercy, Soshiro stopped it all at once. He removed his fingers from her heat and watched her body still trembling. He removed the restricting clothing that was now sticky from sweat in their workout. His pants unbuckled, freeing his member. It was throbbing red and physically hurting from the previous constriction. It was hard from arousal and has been leaking with precum since earlier wanting to finally have a release. He watched the woman he loves slowly recovering yet still out of her mind as he stroked his member, just watching her fucked out image was making it twitch and as he remembered her reactions from earlier, it didn't take long for him to pump out his own release.

Feeling something warm and sticky landing on her stomach, Kagami focused her eyes to see her fiance, now naked, touching his own member. She couldn't help but bite her lips at the sight, from how lean and muscular it was, even more so as she looked at his face full of concentration as he rode his high.

"You liking the sight?"

He asked her with a smirk, noticing her blatant oogling. It made her blush again before looking away, though she didn't hide her nod from him earning her a chuckle.

"Sorry I don't have a condom so..."

He completely removed his own clothing, proudly exhibiting his member. It was on the leaner side yet longer at around 6-7 inches. He was preparing to go and take care of his problem by himself.

"It's fine if we don't use one. I-I'm ready for it but if you aren't then I..."

She tried to sit up to go try and help him but was down again. She usually have a lot of strength and stamina yet this activity greatly consumes it all. He went to sit down beside her and hugged her, placing a kiss on her head.

"I'm also fine with it but are you sure?"

"Yeah though I... I can still try to help you with that"

Stuttering a bit about her offer, Kagami couldn't help but let out a shy look. Soshiro chuckled at her conviction and willingness to help but...

"Maybe next time"

They kissed each other passionately before he moved back on top of her and readied to position himself. They both know what this means are fully ready to accept what happens next. For now, they've got important matters to attend to.

Looking at each other in the eye, fingers interlocked together, he went inside. It was a complete different experience compared to earlier. Kagami could feel an even longer length than his fingers reaching far deeper into her hole, she let out a gasp from how it completely filled her up. Soshiro, though, had to give it his all not to immediately cum from how tight she was. He pressed his forehead on hers as his brows furrowed in deep concentration, letting out grunts. And when he finally got it all in, he waited for her signal before moving.

He started the pace slow and sensual, wanting their first time to be something special, to be making love and not just sex. He was going deep and accurately hitting her spot yet never changing the pace. Looking at each other in the eyes, giving out a smile despite the moaning and grunting. They were completely matching each other's movements, proof that they've known each other for a long time to know what to do next, despite this being their first time.

He would whisper to her sweet nothings, praises, and words of assurance. Rubbing her hand and bringing it up to kiss it. He's clearly proven to her just how much she means to him and it fills her with so much joy.

"I think i'm the happiest woman in the world right now"

With the tears falling down her eyes once more, never looking away from his, she thanked him to which he shook his head.

"You'll be the happiest forever, not just now"

He made her a promise, he said it with much certainty that she felt like it's true... She believe it to be true. They both share a laughter even as they both feel their orgasms coming closer.

"I love you, Soshiro"

"I love you too, Kagami"

With their lips pressed against each other, they moved their bodies in synchronicity getting more desperate after each stroke. Both wanting to reach their orgasms in a feral attempt, their feelings for each other so overflowing until finally... Finally, they came together, truly becoming one with each other. They ride their high together and stopped.

"I love you"

They looked at each other and let out another round of chuckles and giggles.

"Uzui Kagami, you are the loveliest woman I've ever met and I'm honored to be chosen to stay by your side"

"Hoshina Soshiro, you're the kindest man I've ever met and I'm thankful that you chose to stay by my side"

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[moonstruckme]

In a Week - send a character + au and I'll write a blurb for it (like vampire!Eddie, bodyguard!Sirius, etc.)

you made think of royalty au princess!reader x bodyguard!sirius mutual pining where they have both harbored a secret crush on each other but had to hide it for years because of their duty/position, only to find out that princess!reader is the queen’s illegitimate child and therefore unfit to marry the neighboring kingdom’s prince, delighted that her engagement has been annulled she goes to tell her faithful bodyguard and to confesses her feelings for him once and for all, while he (bodyguard!sirius) hasn’t heard the news yet goes to confess his feelings for her because he can’t take it anymore and is surprised by her confession

Thanks for requesting my love! Hope you like it :)

join the party

bodyguard!Sirius x fem!reader ♡ 1.8k words

Sirius goes a little bit crazy every time he can’t be with you. He tells himself it’s a side effect of his position, that every moment you’re out of sight carries with it the potential for danger, but he’s come to know better than that over the last few years. It doesn’t matter if another very competent guard is on shift with you, or if you’re being escorted by a whole team of his best guys—it’s torture nonetheless, not necessarily because he’s worried about you, but simply because he’s away from you. 

That probably explains the acute upset forming somewhere behind his sternum as he waits outside the doors to your parents’ room. Though far from a ceremonial meeting place, it’s the most secure room in the palace, so when your mother had said she and your father needed to speak with you alone, Sirius had no choice but to comply. You’ve been having a lot of these family meetings in the weeks following your engagement, though he can’t figure what about this one could call for such secrecy. Maybe confidential information on relations between your nation and your betrothed’s, or something like that. As much as he hates leaving you in there alone, Sirius is glad he doesn’t have to stand impassively by the wall and listen to plans for your marriage. 

He can tell you don’t love the prince, not that it matters. He doesn’t think the prince loves you either. All that’s required of either of you is the appearance of affability in public. Romance was never part of the equation, and you’ve long since accepted that even if Sirius hasn’t. He’s been thinking about it for weeks, how different his life would become once you're another man’s wife. He’d have to help you weave yourself into the prince’s life, deliver you to your shared bed every night and pick you up every morning as if he didn't know what might’ve happened there, watch as you potentially fall in love with someone else. And love probably would blossom between you and the prince in time. It’s not easy to avoid when you spend so long around someone; Sirius would know. 

He decided just last night that he wouldn’t be able to handle it. He wrote his letter of resignation this morning. He’s going to tell you before he submits it to his boss because it’d feel like a betrayal to do it without you knowing, but he's made up his mind. He’ll stay for a few weeks to train his replacement and then bow out the day before your wedding. Sirius hopes you’re still open to being friends, but he’s not foolish enough to think he’ll get to see you anywhere near as often while you’re running a kingdom thousands of miles away. He’s just going to have to nurse his throbbing heart while he searches for a new job. 

The door to your parents room opens softly, but Sirius stiffens as if it had screamed on its hinges. You emerge looking as graceful as you always do, but there are tearstains on your pretty cheeks. Sirius assesses you quickly, though there’s no indication there’s been any threat other than some sort of bad news. Your face isn’t blotchy, and the tracks are faint, as though you’d tried to wipe them away without a mirror to guide you. Whatever caused your upset, you seem to have mostly recovered from it now. Still, Sirius’ heart aches at the sight of you. 

“Everything okay, Princess?” he asks, and it’s a business question but put in his gentlest tone. 

“Yeah,” you say, and despite your prim appearance, the breathy quality of your voice gives away your discomposure. You glance out the window. “Can we, um, take a walk outside, please?”

Sirius has always appreciated that you’re kind enough to ask when you know you don’t have to, though he wishes you wouldn’t just now. “Of course.” He opens the door for you, nodding to the guard posted outside as he follows you through. 

The weather has cooled recently, signaling the beginning of autumn even though the leaves have yet to change colors. It’s your favorite season. (Another thing, Sirius thinks with some bitterness, which he knows and your future husband won’t.) You look to be enjoying it well enough, face tipped towards the sun and breathing deeply like you’re trying to rejuvenate yourself. Sirius decides to withhold his questions about your tears for the time being, to give you a chance to get back to your usual content self. 

“Is something wrong?” you ask without opening your eyes. 

“I…with me? No,” he lies. “I’m just a little worried about you, angel. Why do you ask?”

“You’re clicking your tongue like you do when you’re thinking hard.” 

Sirius almost laughs, it’s such a bizarre thing to pick up on. But you’re right, and he stops.

You grow used to someone’s presence when you spend eight hours of every day around them. Sirius knows which of your laughs is the real one, and which is put on for someone else’s benefit. He can tell which clothes you’re going to reach for before you decide what to wear based on how you’re feeling that day. He knows how you like your tea, and what dishes from the kitchen you secretly have to choke down, and that you prefer to use the servant’s passages when you can get away with it because you don’t always feel like being stopped to talk in the hallways. 

But Sirius is expected to know those things. It’s part of his job. What had surprised him was when you started revealing how much you knew. It had started small (“You okay, Siri? You seem quiet today”) but soon the stores of information you’d been covertly gathering on him began to spill out of you. You started making him coffee after lunchtime when you knew he'd be having his afternoon crash, you’d switched to candles when you’d noticed your incense irritating his allergies, he’d found the pantries stocked with his favorite foods and the chef told him you’d requested them specifically. You didn’t have to do any of that, but the fact that you did anyway just shows the kind of person you are. It’s part of why Sirius is so painfully in love with you. 

“I have been thinking,” he says carefully, “and there’s something I want to talk to you about, but it can wait. Do you want to tell me what got you so rattled in there?”

You take a breath, sitting down on a nearby bench and patting the space next to you. Sirius knows he should really stay standing, keep scanning the area, but he checks nonverbally with the guard nearest and, receiving a nod, sits beside you. You look like you’re steadying yourself.

“Hey,” he says softly, placing his hand atop yours. “What’s going on, sweetheart? Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” you reply, leaning closer to him in that familiar way he’s going to miss. “Yeah, sorry, I am. It was a mix of good and bad, actually. Um, I’m not the king’s daughter.” 

Sirius blinks, almost pulling away in shock. Of all the things he’d been expecting you to say, that one hadn’t made the list. “You’re not?”

You shake your head, looking distantly at the rose bushes in front of you. “No. My mom had an affair with some—some merchant, I guess. He’s dead now.” Your voice is detached, as if you’re talking of someone you read about in the paper rather than your biological father. “He died a few days ago, apparently. That’s when my mom finally decided to tell my—the king.”

Sirius turns toward you more fully, setting his hand on your knee. He can’t imagine what you’re going through, all this information all at once, the fabric of your life torn and revealed to be thin as paper. “What does that mean for you?” 

“I’m still a princess, but—” you blow out a breath, disturbing the pieces of hair around your face “—it’s weird. The royal line is through my father, so I don’t have any official power or anything. But I still get to live here, play the part. Like a figurehead or something.” You look at him for the first time, something surprisingly like hope in your gaze. “But since I don’t have royal blood, I can’t marry the prince.” 

Sirius freezes, not allowing himself any outward reaction. His heart contracts for your loss even as his own selfish joy makes him dizzy.

 “Are you okay?” he asks. It’s almost a whisper. 

“I shouldn’t be,” you reply, just as softly. “He’s a decent man, and the best alliance we could have hoped for. But honestly, I’m relieved.” 

Sirius lets out a breath, thumb stroking your knee soothingly. “That’s understandable, angel. You’ve just had your whole world shaken up, it’d be a lot to have to move to another kingdom after all that.” 

“I mean, I didn’t love him.” You shrug, and Sirius grins at the bizarre lightness with which you talk of your marriage. You’re coming back to yourself slowly, even if there still seems to be something holding you back. Then you begin to gnaw at your bottom lip, your dead giveaway that you’re feeling nervous. Sirius waits. “I don’t think I ever could have loved him, honestly. There’s…there’s always been someone else I’d rather be with.” 

Sirius thinks he’s stopped breathing. It’s a good thing he’d put another guard in charge of watching your perimeter, because he’s definitely not capable of it right now. “Yeah?” he asks quietly. 

You nod, and he feels awful for your lip, the poor mistreated thing. “Yeah. I, um, I understand if it’s too weird for you, Siri. I just, I’m sorry. I feel like I have to tell you.” You let out a little laugh, pitched high by nerves but real. “It’s a day for confessions, apparently.” 

“Sweetheart.” He squeezes your knee, and you jolt a little. He waits until you’re looking at him to speak. “I have loved you for so long, I couldn’t even tell you when it started. I never would’ve…” he shakes his head, feeling as though he’s in a dream. “I didn’t think there was anything I could do about it. I was about to hand in my resignation today—” your eyes widen in horror “—because I couldn’t stand to watch you marry someone else.” 

“Sirius,” you say sharply, taking both his hands in yours like he’s going to run off on you if you don’t secure him. “You can’t resign. You’re going to stay, now, right? You’ll stay?”

“Of fucking course I’m staying.” He grins, and you mirror it somewhat dazedly. “Angel, are you kidding me? They’re gonna have to drag me away from my shifts after this.”

“I could always hide you in my room,” you propose. “I’ll bring you food and everything.” 

“Tempting, gorgeous. I might take you up on that.” Sirius runs his thumb over your knuckles, relishing in the new intimacy of the familiar gesture. “Can’t believe you go to confess to me first. Typical of you to have all the power.” 

You scoff incredulously. “Shut up,” you say, but you’re smiling, and that’s all he wanted.

[eggs-can-draw]

various pregame shenaniganeries, including a baby shu because I missed him :) kinda long naegamigiri timeline thing under the cut that I made at like 1 am on friday

Hi hi hi sit down we’re gonna talk about pre-game naegamigiri because they’re kinda the reverse of how in-game naegamigiri ends up together in my head. HI hihihi this is Egg slightly later this kinda grabbed me and ran into the sunset so naegamigiri timeline thing lets goooooooo

So to start us out, we have the top two in the class, Togami sitting at no. 2 and Kirigiri sitting at no. 1. Togami being Togami, instantly turns this into a competition. His number 1 priority becomes rising to the no. 1 spot and shoving it in this dumbass detective’s smug face. At first, Kirigiri really couldn't be bothered, but sadly, she fell victim to Togami’s secret second talent, Super High School Level Drama Queen. So pretty quickly into their first year, Kirigiri and Togami are academic rivals! Both being naturally competitive, it rapidly evolves into full on rivals! Until…over time. They become reluctant friends. And suddenly class-78 has the world’s scariest power couple.  

BUT EGG! You may be screaming at me, WHERE IS NAEGI IN ALL THIS?? Well you see, as the shsl lucky student and self proclaimed Just Some Guy, when he quickly fell head over heels for the power couple, he instantly assumed both were waaaay out of his league. I mean, who wouldn't? Togami practically refused to give ANYONE the time of day, and Kirigiri is one of the most closed off people on the PLANET. And while he does make friends with them during the rivalry era of their relationship, he resigns himself to pining for both from the sidelines

LITTLE DOES HE FUCKING KNOW THOUGH. Kirigiri and Togami are definitely happy together, but their relationship as it is feels like it's... Missing something. After about a week of awkward tension, they both admit to having a crush on Naegi. With both of them on the same page, they make it their mission to confess to Naegi, and get him to join the polycule!

So yeah it's a lot of fluff from both Kirigiri and Togami, Very Obviously Flirting and Naegi pulling the classic “Ok But Did They Mean It As A Friend” that slowly gets more and more intense.

Like. Picture this. A fancy candlelight dinner, the three of them at an expensive Michelin star restaurant, Kirigiri and Togami both got Naegi flowers, afterwards they went on a walk through a local park and watched the sunset with just the three of them.

Naegi still didn't get the hint.

After almost two years of flirting with Naegi being (somewhat willfully) oblivious, they decide to bite the bullet and just tell him. The dynamic duo write Naegi an adorable love letter, laying all their feelings out in the open, but the day they give it to him, just happened to be the day that class-78 was barricaded inside Hope’s Peak.

He was going to read it in his room when he was called down for the memory wipe, and it just happened to fall out of his pocket as he was walking out.

But fear not! This story isn't over yet! The polycule is real and they do love each other!

Beginning the game, Naegi can't help but feel. Weird. Whenever he's around Togami and Kirigiri. His head feels light and his chest gets all fluttery and he stumbles over his words a bit more than usual.

While looking through one of the classrooms on the second floor, after the first trial, he finds. A letter? Its torn and damaged but when he opens it, the handwriting feels oddly familiar? Names have been scratched out but he can't help but feel incredibly hot in the face when he reads it. He doesn't know why, but seeing this gives him a boost of confidence! While Monokuma shows up to rain on his parade and take the letter, it doesn't work and he uses this confidence to approach Kirigiri. They have a heart to heart and both admit to feeling the warm fuzzies around each other for an unknown reason. They’ve known each other for what, half a week? Kirigiri can't help but be intrigued so they decide to hang out more, this leading the two into a soft and fluffy relationship.

As trial two comes and goes, they both come to a startling yet all to familiar realization. They ALSO get the warm and fuzzies around Togami. That bastard. While making sure to do so outside of the earshot of a certain shsl Murderer, they both approach Togami, who (begrudgingly) admits to feeling the same. While it starts out a bit rocky, the three form a solid and loving polycule.

AND THEN CHAPTER 5 HAPPENS. I could talk about chapter 5 for a million years. Honestly. The angst potential is so so so so so so so strong. Togami doesn't want to believe that he’s been tricked by the two people he promised himself he’s make it out alive with, Naegi refuses to believe that Kirigiri would kill anyone but also a dead body doesn't just appear out of nowhere, and Kirigiri is just TRYING TO SURVIVE.

Pov you are Asahina, Scissor System, Yasuhiro, and Junko and you are witnessing a brutal divorce. The fire is real.

After Naegi’s execution, Togami is a MESS, Kirigiri completely shuts herself off, her one priority being getting Naegi the fuck outta the trash and making up with her short boyfriend. Once the sunshine boy himself is back, tall boyfriend has grown some bad abandonment issues and is beginning his journey as the Super High School Level Mother Hen, so as he’s lecturing treating Naegi’s for his injuries from almost being executed, Naegi gets them all to kiss (literally) and make up. Things aren't perfect, but they're on the same page.

And then trial 6 happens, and they win the killing game. Things seem scary, but they know that whatever they face out there, they’ll have each other.

It doesn't take long for the future foundation to find them, the small group of kids like scared animals being thrust into a world they no longer remember. Naegamigiri refuse to let go of each other, even when the FF’s medic team try to give them a check up to make sure they weren't seriously injured (which in Naegi’s case, led to Kirigiri and Togami yelling at the medic team that tried to shove Naegi onto a gurney and deeper into the hospital wing without them.

Things are tense and scary and they are tired but no matter what they have hope. The world is big and scary and completely foreign to them but no matter what, they have each other, and they have hope for the future.

FLASH FORWARD! The three are official members of the Future Foundation, and have been working on their little pet project involving The Remnants of Despair. After a lot of long talks, they agreed that they wouldn't get married until the tragedy was completely over, then where they would all leave the future foundation to pursue their ambitions and live a happy life together. This agreement, however, does not extend to children. This quickly becomes very relevant when through a series of vaguely ambiguous events, they ended up with little Shuichi Last-Name-Pending! So things get a smidge more stressful. The middle of the apocalypse is the perfect time for a kid. I have no idea what you're talking about.

Then UDG happens. And the stress. Rises. To put it lightly. Almost losing Togami definitely shifted perspective for the power trio. Kirigiri and Naegi were terrified of the thought of not only losing their partner, but Shuichi having to grow up without one of his parents. Togami got progressively more mother hen, despite being the one who almost died.

On the happier side, Komaru was very happy to find out she was an aunt! Once the tragedy is over, she is going to spoil the ever loving shit out of him. I’m sorry sir, but my nephew asked for no fucking pickles!

Things get kinda vague for me after this. Sdr2 happens, with Naegamigiri once again almost dying as you do. Shuichi gains a surprise new uncle, he also gets babysat by Asahina, and once naegamigiri get back I remember that I haven't finished the dr3 anime.

Not 100% sure if I’m gonna keep the dr3 killing game who knows. Maybe things stay cute and fluffy and nothing huge happens for naegamigiri until the tragedy is officially over and Togami and Kirigiri leave the future foundation to pursue their passions (FF wont let Naegi leave, sadly, he did get to change his job to a stay at home one tho, mans basically does paperwork on a laptop all day and sometimes has to go on long business trips to speak to people all over the world to help restore hope and stuff)

One important detail: The HPA survivors are not involved in the resurrection of hope's peak. It's something that's bugged me for a while and it just. It doesn't sit right with me.

A long time later, Shuichi and his friends attend Hopes Peak (a certain gremlin has to lie to their dad to get there due to Bad Blood Tee Em but it's fiiiine they're all fiiiiiine) where shit hits the fan, and I’m not gonna reveal that until I finish v3 so for now, that’s it! Get out of my house! Come back later! You’ve had your food for the day!

[bored-storyteller]

uh I love your storys about Uta ^^. You write him so good and in character . Could you maybe write a story about him were him and the reader ( human) meeting at an auction like reader was captured and meets Uta there . But maybe they escape the auction house and meet Uta sometime after this again. I`m sorry I love Uta angst and fluff .

Dear anon. I'll tell you, your request inspired me a lot (that's why I did it right away), but I must confess that I'm not really satisfied with the result and I'm sorry (I rewrote it three times). I have to thank my poor summary skills for this defeat, I don't think I managed to really give you what you asked me. Feel free to send me clarifications or a further request for me to remedy!

43- Tokyo Ghoul, Uta x human!reader

“The bird of ill omen and the broken toy”

You are in front of his eyes, huddled in a corner of the cold and dark container. On your knees, tied up, you are the condemned to death ready to face the gallows, or rather you are a delicious dish wrapped in its most beautiful dress to entice the spectators.

"Oh, look here ... what a delightful creature."

You are not the main article, you are not the rare object, yet your smell has brought him there. Uta is not a glutton, but he couldn't resist the temptation to peek at whoever was carrying such an inviting fragrance.

"This is really a shame ..." his voice is sweet, calm, yet ironic and cruel. Yes, it's a shame that he has to give you to some miserly ghoul.

Uta doesn’t usually prefer a certain type of food, he is not delicate or picky, nor does he have problems eating even his similar ones. But he has to admit that while those bright eyes of yours, shining with tears and desperation, look at him, he really would like to be able to eat them. Yes, it is rare for someone to stimulate his appetite in this way, customers really have to thank him for his self-control.

You are so small in his shadow, and even if you tremble, even if you smell of fear, he sees no hope in your eyes.

You know you have no escape. As little as you may be when it comes to ghouls, you know you can't save yourself. You heard them talk.

You would rather die now than continue that torture.

He feels it, and oh, how tempted he is to grant your wish.

He leans over you, he wants to see you well, he wants to hear you. The demonic beak of his mask brushes against you, rubs against your temple like the muzzle of a mother cuddling his cub, or the muzzle of a lion that is playing with his prey.

Maybe, if he had met you in another situation ... maybe ...

No. He doesn't necessarily have to devour you. Nothing is ever said with Uta, even he knows it, he knows himself. Who knows what would have happened if you had met somewhere else. Who knows who you were, elsewhere.

In conclusion, you were both unlucky: you cannot survive, and he cannot be the one to eat you. You have something in common.

"Uta!"

Roma's voice makes its way, muffled by the metal container in which you are locked up - like a ready meal -

"I'm coming!" It's time for him to go on stage, for you it's time for the final bow.

He doesn't tell you anything anymore, he doesn't need to. He will say goodbye to you that same evening, but he feels a little happy that you are among the last items to be exhibited.

He still gives you a look, you, little shaking puppet, sweet broken toy. Who can fix you anymore?

After that, he leaves you behind, abandoned in the cold darkness of your last hours in solitude, as he plunges into the cold light of demons, ready to entertain his fellow men with his affable ways. What a crazy world you are both in.

. . .

Locked in your cold prison, if you could you would cover your ears in a desperate attempt to get away from the announcements and screams, but it's impossible for you. So you wait, trembling in your shell of panic, not knowing what to do. If only you had at least a vain hope, a false chance. If only you could save yourself, for some reason, any reason then yeah, oh, how dear life would be to you thereafter. But you can't even think now.

And you don't even realize that the noises change. The cries of the victims become the cries of the executioners, and the applause becomes breathless footsteps in search of a safe place. But you don't know it, or at least not until they get closer, more distressed. They are probably running away. But who can save you? Who knows you are there? Who can remember you?

And in fact, no one stops, no one frees you, and the footsteps and the screams brush against you and pass you, without bothering to kill or save you. At least you think so.

But as soon as the silence comes, the creaking of the doors opening makes you lift your face, towards the light.

He is there again, and you wonder if that Bird of ill Omen is not your hallucination. With that bizarre suit, that hateful mask, and those ancient letters around his neck that seem ready to strangle him.

He doesn't talk to you. He is simply looking at you, you feel him looking at you, behind that deadly beak. In the silence that surrounds you, whether it is a real silence or created by mutual presence, he suddenly occupies your every thought in those few seconds of eternity. Maybe it's the touch of death that wanders your mind, but suddenly unusual questions arise in you. Who knows who he is, what he does. What does he like and what not ... does he live in the alleys of the city, or maybe, instead, without that mask he pretends to be someone?

He came to take you and devour you. But it almost seems like a strange barrier is keeping him away from you.

And while you are suspended in this limbo of cold resignation, as he came he disappears, and with his disappearance he takes away from you that sad calm that had enveloped you.

The panic returns as someone approaches.

Don't scream. Don't scream. Don't scream.

"Hey, are you okay?"

Clean eyes, a clean face, no mask is looking at you agitated. You don't know how to answer, you don't even know if what you are seeing is true.

“I'm a human, I'm a CCG investigator. Don't worry, it's okay, we'll get you out of here. "

Without your being fully aware of it, you find yourself in warm, safe arms that take you away from hell behind you. You didn't even realize you were crying.

. . .

He recognized your smell right away.

Even if it's been some time since his meeting with you, it's hard to forget something that has affected him so much, especially if it is something that has particularly touched his sensitivity over that of others.

And it's not that Uta is then easily surprised, he is ready to expect anything from that crazy world, yet you manage to upset him without even knowing that he is there.

You are smiling. And that's not the fact, but at the same time it is. You are smiling sweetly, sincerely. Your eyes are clear and bright, and you are listening to someone talking to you about their petty problems without batting an eye.

That night, that night he met you, he came back to eat you. He was not a ghoul who got lost in gluttony, but given the situation he had a particular interest in the statement "carpe diem".

He hadn't, in the end. In the end he just looked at you. It would have been easy to swallow you, but he had left you there. He had told himself that he hadn't made it in time, but who knows what was really going through his head at that moment.

It doesn't matter anymore, however. What's a broken toy like you doing so quietly exposed? How can you smile at people like that, when surely the world around you has crumbled into millions of little bits?

You make him angry, you know? Humans like you, whom the world keeps getting back on their feet despite everything, provoke anger in him.

And you are there, a few steps away from him, and you do not realize that the one who had the task of trampling your life is watching you.

And no matter how much anger he may feel inside of him, he can't help but look at you, as you speak comfortable words to someone, while you give your attention as if you have no problem.

"Uta?" Renji's voice, intent on looking at him from behind the coffee shop counter, makes him look away from you.

"Nh? Ah… ”His gaze falls on his now coffee-stained lap. The stain is almost invisible on the black sweater, but it is damp and warm.

"Don't laugh ... can you give me a towel please?"

"I'm not laughing." Yet Uta could swear that in the serious voice of his trusted friend a note of amusement is audible even to those who do not know him.

Carefully he puts the cup back on the saucer, making sure not to do any further damage.

This then. When was he ever so distracted for a human?

But when he instinctively looks for you, after all that nice little theater, you're not there anymore. The table you occupied is empty.

Only one object remained abandoned on the shiny surface. A book lies alone, the bookmark sticking out in the middle.

It is placed on the side where you sat. Did you leave in such a hurry that you left it there?

It is not that he has a real reason to do it, yet, while he is about to leave :Re, with all the tranquility that characterizes him, he picks up that literary volume in his hands, hiding it inside his jacket. Even that printed paper is imbued with your smell by now.

. . .

You talk to books, apparently. The edges of the pages are filled with thoughts written in pencil. They are all yours, it almost seems like you use the books as your diary, but there is nothing so personal about you. They are just… points of view. The world told by you, depending on the inspiration that the phrases in the book give you.

"It must be difficult to live in a world where you can talk to your food about your favorite book."

When Uta's eyes had settled on that particular phrase, he had closed. For someone else it might have been a stupid phrase, probably, but for him it was like a punch in the stomach.

He doesn't know if you wrote it before or after the accident, but in any case that simple sentence arouses a mixture of emotions that he doesn't really know where to place. Even if you wanted to, you couldn't understand what it meant to be a ghoul in that world, but on the other hand, the utopia in which Renji seems so hoping could be made up of people like you. If only he believed it, Uta could like that world, as long as there was a place in that world for someone like him.

“Excuse me, did you happen to find a book yesterday? I'm afraid I left it here by mistake. " Your cordial voice betrays a note of alarmism as you speak to the young girl. Your hands grip the counter as if it were a rock of salvation, but your feet are ready to run elsewhere, to look somewhere else in case it isn't there.

"Oh ... no, I'm sorry, I haven't seen any books." Touka's voice is sorry, an apologetic tone hovers between her words.

"Oh, damn ... sorry, thanks anyway!" Your words are so hasty, so quick that he doesn't have time to interrupt them.

The bell rings and the door closes with a click.

"You have it, don't you?" Renji never misses anything - or almost -.

"Yeah, it’s better that I give it back to them before they run all over Tokyo on foot."

"How long have you been so thoughtful?"

Uta allows himself to take a last look at the silver-haired ghoul from over his sunglasses, as he prepares to leave the cafe: "I'm always thoughtful."

. . .

The snow has just started to fall. It is light and silent, the parks of the metropolis have not yet begun to turn white.

You would gladly stay and watch the show from the heat of your home, if it weren't for that damn book you forgot somewhere. Oh, you love your books, but they're so good at hiding. You were convinced you left it in the coffee shop!

"Excuse me…"

A cordial voice caresses your eardrums. It's so warm and peaceful, yet a chill shiver stops the blood in your veins.

Turning around, you meet a man dressed in black. He is strange, but it doesn't surprise you, there are a lot of strange people in such a big city, even people who wear sunglasses on a snowy day.

You had already seen him in the cafe, but you didn't dwell on him. Not because he doesn't get your attention, just… it was an instinct.

“I think you were looking for this. I found it yesterday by chance. "

Clear and tapered fingers hand you your much-desired book. On fair skin, intertwining dark patterns form inexplicable designs, at least for you, but you're sure they have a lot to say, don't they?

Slowly you reach out your hand, and hesitantly touch the cover, to resume what you were looking for.

The night of the accident did not disappear. You are scared. You are afraid of death, but even more of pain, of imprisonment. You are afraid of fear itself. However, you are also afraid of not living, of wasting, of losing.

You are in a limbo that does not let you escape, and you can not help but continue your life, savoring every second, waiting for the Bird of ill Omen to come and get you.

So you push back the mistrust again, and a grateful and kind smile goes to the one who helped you, without asking for explanations.

"Thank you very much." Your voice reaches his pierced ears with such unexpected sweetness.

"It was a pleasure." His smile, decorated with the piercing, is barely hinted at, but delicate - reassuring? -

And for endless moments you look at each other, in silence, without speaking and without thinking. And then, as if nothing had happened, the dances between prey and predator begin.

"Can I buy you a coffee?"

. . .

Your eyes look at him shiny, frightened. You are still in a cage, imprisoned by a body that will soon be ready to consume you.

Uta wonders if you really never anticipated this. All the times you've crossed paths, have you really ever been in doubt? Every time you looked at him, every time you smiled at him or laughed at his words, did you never guess the truth? No, maybe you've always known it from the start, broken toys never work too well.

The mask of that evening, like a macabre mockery - both for him and for you - is leaning on the work table, not far from you, looking at you placidly. It’s a coincidence that he pulled it out just in the morning.

Suddenly the images of that day come back between you two, like a dream. The incomprehensible to you tattoo on his neck has a creepy look overwhelmed by the shadows that the soft lights create on the ghoul.

Fear invades you, like a script. Yet, while the Bird of ill Omen looms over you, trapping you in the corner of the room with his arms, your terror is different from what he had already seen in you. Today it is almost more visible, less controlled, as you tremble beneath him.

Maybe it's the surprise of being caught in a trap by someone who – perhaps- you had slowly begun to love – despite everything-, or maybe, simply, inside you a little hope still survives.

Uta's head bends, and the tip of his nose brushes your neck, smelling the coveted perfume that had so attracted him.

If you're so scared, how did you smile all that time? How did you keep going? How did you keep loving that world?

Beside his mask, as a warning of future torment, your dear book lies silent, ready to say goodbye. You lent it to him last time, he asked you for it.

Your smell is as strong, sweet, delicious as ever - so why is his stomach closing up? -

His jaws open, and as delicate as cruel they enclose your fragile neck. In them, the accelerated beats of your heart, still alive, make him tremble.

One bite and you will be nothing but dead flesh, and he hesitates.

He had to kill you before it was too late, right? Uta should know himself well enough, he had to understand right away what was happening inside him.

A sigh, and then his lips pull away, his saliva stops wetting you. He is not hungry, he has already eaten.

He is still upon you, but now he is only looking at you, with his eyes of blood and darkness. You, like a frightened puppy, remain shaking in a corner for a few moments, lost in his pupils. And then, like a crazy lightning bolt, you run away, as you have always run away. You slip under his arms, and as fast as you can you reach the door of the shop.

Uta watches you go, swallows bitter air, and then bows his head, surrendered.

What will happen now? Will you shut up in fear? Will you tell anyone? Only time will tell.

He slowly gets up, his hands caressing each other's tattooed arms, in a distracted gesture of protection, as he approaches the table. His fingers touch it, and then squeeze it, while he looks at the book that is left alone again, without your eyes on it.

And then, suddenly, as if he had woken up from a dream, he notices something: your smell has not vanished.

Turning his view, he sees you. You are still there, or maybe you are back there.

Now it is you who are on the side of the light, and he is in the corner of the cage. The Bird of ill Omen has become the broken toy, left alone among his masks.

"What's up?" No matter the crack inside, Uta always looks so mature, peaceful, even after he has threatened to kill you.

You take a step towards him, but your outstretched arm continues to secure yourself to the door jamb. If you left he wouldn't follow you, you know that right?

"I ... I think I'm crazy, Uta ..." You too realize how much your behavior is against logic, how foolish it is to remain - to search - in your nightmare. But on the other hand, humans ... no, people, when they are desperate, lose the light of reason, and do wrong things. Things the world says are wrong. That world, which claims to be the only one, when it is nothing more than a facade, a corner of something much larger.

"Yes, I think so too." He really thinks so. You have to be crazy to still be there, at least as crazy as he is. "Why are you still here?"

You shrug your shoulders, hugging yourself more out of shyness than out of fear - yeah, you're no longer afraid, it's as if you've run out of batteries.

"I ... as long as I'm alive I can choose, right?" It came out of your lips so naturally that you didn't even realize it was you who uttered that sentence, yet it's a truth so deep, so intense that it has guided you from that damn night to this day.

"And what are you choosing?"

Your eyes cast a fleeting glance outside, at the glimmer of the city, and without hesitation you gently accompany the door to close, imprisoning you. Imprisoning both of you.

Maybe it's a prison, but this time it's really your choice. You are with that Bird of ill Omen, but you are not tied up, you are not thrown to the ground in a cold corner. You are with him, surrounded by works of art that stare at you impassively, but it was you who decided it.

"I choose not to ignore anymore ..." Your fingers intertwine with each other, you play with them as if you need to keep them busy as you approach him. He is waiting for you. "I want to understand."

"How can you understand?" He would like to tell you, but he doesn't say a word, because not even he can understand you. What kind of mask would suit you? Who knows, yet he has learned enough about you that he should be able to think of at least one. But no, you are always there, hoping for something, believing that after all, living is worthwhile.

So he stays there, even when you lean against him. Not a contact, but a fusion. Stomach against stomach, lungs against lungs, heart against heart. Your hands cling to his arms only to hold him closer, and as he looks at your closed eyes he knows you're listening to him. You're trying to feel his every breath, every twitch of him. You want to get inside him, and he lets you do it - isn't that what he wanted too?

The predator and the prey united in a single entity for an eternal instant.

It's all so against the moral and social rules, but what do you care now? You already know he could kill you. And in that world that goes round and round without stopping, a black writing in an ancient language that also goes around a greedy neck could be your starting point for putting the pieces back together. Maybe it's a disease, maybe it's madness, but deep down, why not? Why not go a little further? Better to die than to be afraid to live, right?

"How much confidence ..."

His voice further softened by his whisper makes your previously closed eyelids lift. His nocturnal eyes look at you slightly narrowed, a slight upward crease caresses his lips without even knowing it. It is difficult for Uta to do something without being aware of it.

He is very beautiful. Beautiful and awful.

"Can't I?"

The world out there, the crazy little world is gone.

"Well, why not ... you are my food, after all."

[attack-on-kiwi]

Hi! I really enjoy your writing and your characterization. Could I please request the rest of the fluff alphabet for post-timeskip Reiner? (whichever point is easiest for you to write from)

Check my master list for letters F, H, N, & R!

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

There isn’t much Reiner genuinely likes doing. He’s more than happy to just take part in whatever activities his s/o wants to do. At this point he doesn’t feel like he’s allowed to have an opinion or have any strong wants. This does bother his s/o, so they need to try and coax an answer from him.

They find out he enjoys going for walks. Reiner specifically likes going on long hikes where no other people are around. Sure, he enjoys walking around the marketplace, but there’s always a pressure that he’s going to be cut down at any given moment. Therefore, private hikes are more his scene. He’s able to relax and will be more willing to open up to his s/o during these hikes. 

If he had to pick another activity, it would be training together. He’d want to do something physical, such as sparring because it gives him an easy and familiar way to tease them in a more lighthearted manner, such as play wrestling. It’s one of the few times his s/o gets to see Reiner act his age and not put up walls. 

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Resilience. The fact that his s/o is able to push through being with someone like him and still see the good in this terrible world has him weak. He feels undeserving of someone so good, but he’s too attached to even consider letting them go. 

To Reiner, their laugh is the most reassuring and calming sound. No matter if their laugh is a gentle chime or a crashing wave, he can’t get enough of it. He swears to himself whenever he makes them laugh, he falls more deeply in love with them than he thought could be possible. 

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Reiner wouldn’t really know where to start. His mind is racing with thoughts such as “Is there an attack?” and “Did they get hurt?”. He lacks tact when calming them down, gripping their shoulders and forcing them to look at him as he near demands them to spill what’s going on. When that doesn’t work, he tries to rethink his approach. He’ll breathe and calm himself before smoothing his palms over their arms and gently asking them what’s wrong. 

He’ll hug them tightly and wait as they relax. Whether they just cling to him until their breathing calms or they ride out their panic, he’s pressed his lips to the top of their head, mumbling “everything is fine” even if he doesn’t believe it himself.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Reiner, like other warriors, doesn’t entertain the idea of having a future. This man has already resigned himself to the idea that he will be dead within a few years, so what is the point of him imagining a future? 

If he could have his way, he’d want a family. At least one child. Though, he wonders if his child would need a friend since he has no siblings that could provide cousins. Maybe two children, then, so they don’t get lonely. He thinks about how he wants a small, comfortable home away from the bustling of the towns. The seaside sounds ideal. Sometimes he imagines what it would feel like to have those children tucked between him and his partner while he told them exaggerated stories of the animals that lived in the forests. 

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He’s physically dominant when it comes to most situation. He’ll put himself before his s/o and make sure they are always in his view. When it comes to intimacy, he teeters between being timid and overbearing. It’s difficult for him to find a balance between wanting to be careful and wanting to have his s/o to himself, and they often find him coming on too strong then becoming reclusive for a few moments after due to the fear of having possibly crosses a boundary. 

Reiner sees himself as a natural guardian, so it’s only to be expected that he takes on more traditionally protective roles.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Reiner is extremely touched that his s/o would stay with a coward such as himself. He thanks them often and brings them gifts. Most of the time it’s food that would otherwise be difficult for them to get their hands on. 

He has a hard time getting out of his head but is able to see that his work and attitude does affect his s/o to a degree and tries to be as mindful as possible. Most times, this mindfulness is chalked up to a simple, “I don’t know what I’d do without you” which needs to be interpreted depending on the context of the situation and his emotional state.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

His s/o grounds him, but they haven’t made huge steps in affecting his personality. He is lost and needs to figure out how to depend on others, and unfortunately, he’s unable to do so credibly at the moment. His s/o hopes Reiner will one day be able to share his burdens with them, even if just a little bit. Reiner definitely teaches them to be patient. 

On the other hand, Reiner is happy to help them overcome their fears. He’s always got a solution and steps to help them get to their goals.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Yes. He’s insecure and is easily provoked by other people giving his s/o attention. If he sees them giving others intimate attention, he will become extremely suspicious and angry. Reiner tries to ignore it since he doesn’t want to cause a scene. Image is important to warriors, after all. He does cling to them more as he tries to calm himself, often holding their hands or hugging them close in private.

If he’s in a situation where he is allowed to make a move, he’s more than willing to use physical force to scare off anyone he sees as trying to get with his s/o.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Reiner’s a good kisser when it comes down to it. His kisses are hot and nearly suffocating. He always has a strong hand behind his partner’s head and another firmly on their back pressing them into him as deep as he can. His skin is warm and being so close to him increases that heat. 

His first kiss with his partner was desperate. Whether it was during an episode back in Paradis or when he got back home, his s/o found him uncharacteristically quiet. Serious. 

Their voice surprised him, causing him to jump as they made their presence known. It was an unusual sight- to see Reiner hunched in on himself. When they got close enough to sit next to him and ask what was going on, he simply told them that he wanted to kiss them at least once since he didn’t know if he’d ever be able to again. After their initial shock, his soon to be s/o agreed, letting him take lead. Reiner licked his lips and placed one hand gently behind their neck while the other rested on their thigh. He leaned ver, finally inviting them to his lips and as the two sought one another’s touch, he found himself pinning them down and nearly unclothing them. Whether his s/o allowed it to continue or stopped is up for debate.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Reiner would never consider confessing.

He would need to be near death or in an extremely stressful and dire situation to blurt it out. 

That, or during more recent manga events, Reiner would try to find a moment of peace where he and his s/o could speak in private. During a conversation where he finally explains his past, he would likely refuse to make eye contact and stare at their feet. His voice is shaking slightly as he steels himself for whatever the outcome may be. It’s his s/o who turns his cheek to look him in the eye, confessing they are in love with him. It’s overwhelming and as he’s embraced by them, he reciprocates it over and over in shaky whispers that are muffled by their neck. 

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

He likes the idea of marriage. Being with someone who is completely his and building a life together that’s peaceful and without pressure would mean the world to him. 

Reiner’s proposal is private. It would be during camp before the climatic battle. One evening, he’d take his s/o to a private area and reminisce their experiences together. He’s unsure why he’s bringing it up until his s/o asks what he wants to do after they win. He’s taken aback, wanting to say there’s not much left for him once the world is saved. “Will you marry me, Reiner?”

Reiner’s heart stops at that moment. It’s not a proposal, more so it’s just gauging his desires. He can’t help but nod. If they survive, even if he has little time left, he wants to spend it with them.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Reiner’s love is subtle. It’s not common for people in Marley to outright be romantic in public, so displays are limited. Though at some point when he was younger he would have taken great pride in being overly affectionate in front of others, he now takes solace in being a quiet and helpful lover. It’s difficult for him to really express his love verbally, so he takes action. He’s good with fixing appliances, running errands, and comforting them in private. To most others, it seems Reiner is distant with his s.o, but this is untrue.

He’s skilled in loving them. His holds are firm and comforting. His kisses are deep and true. His actions express his care more accurately than his words ever could. The way he puts himself before them is in itself his ultimate display of love. 

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Reiner prefers to keep his romantic involvement private due to fear for his s/o’s safety. Being Involved with him makes them a target which is something he’s unwilling to look past. This does not mean he is ashamed of them by any means. 

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

His hugs are all consuming. Something about being in his embrace helps wash away all anxiety. It’s truly difficult for his s/o to be upset for long when they’re in his hold. This becomes especially useful during high stress events, and it helps Reiner calm down.  

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Reiner’s focus isn’t on helping his s/o achieve any goals. His fixation is his mission to save humanity, so he doesn’t actually think too much about if his s/o has any goals they wan to achieve.

If his s/o shares a desire with him, he’s happy to help them map out a plan of attack. There’s not much he can do in ways of helping them if it doesn’t pertain to training or military affairs since most of his time is dedicated to his work. 

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Reiner prefers having a routine above all else. With how erratic his life is, a sense of peace is important to him. He suffers from PTSD and anxiety among other issues, so knowing where his s/o is during a certain time or having a specific ritual at a certain time every day helps him ground himself. He wouldn’t want to deal with any destructive routines when he has free time. It’s extremely important for him to focus on his healing, so a routine is best.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Reiner... does not know his s/o well. He knows what bothers them and knows about them from what they share. However, he doesn’t make an effort to learn more. He’s got too much on his plate, and the relationship is reliant on the physical intimacy to help each other blow off steam. He could stand to be more emotionally present. It’s something he’s aware of and feels like it’s too late to do anything about it. If he survives, he wants to build a stronger relationship where the two can equally rely on one another for the support that they need.

He’s empathetic to a degree. He listens to their problems and tries to offer the best support he can, but he’s not necessarily equipped to help someone deal with their own problems when he barely has a handle on his own shaky mental state.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Reiner is ridiculously obsessed with keeping his relationship. He knows he’s not the best partner that he could be, but he wants to selfishly keep his s/o because they make him feel human. They make him feel worthy of being alive, and he’s too scared of letting that go for who would he be without a purpose? His mission does come first, but he’d be more than willing to throw himself in front of his s/o if it meant securing their escape. 

He’s a natural protector as mentioned before, and couple that with suicidal tendencies and you have someone that’s problematically self-sacrificial. It’s not a good mixture, but it goes to show how dependent he is on his s/o for a sense of stability and how far he’d go to make sure they were safe. 

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

He likes lying face to face when the two are in bed. When Reiner is especially tired, his cheeks and nose flush  a dark pink. It’s always embarrassing when his s/o decides to tease him about it. Don’t you dare call him cute or coo at him because in his tired state he will have no methods of coping. He might even turn around to try and escape their compliments, but if they cling to his back and try to pull him back around, they’re somehow always successful. 

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Reiner doesn’t kiss often. He does like to hold his s/o’s hands. Clasping their fingers with his own and holding their hand sto his chest in moments of quiet vulnerability will be the most stripped down, vulnerable acts he will ever commit. 

He’s not opposed to his partner kissing him and holding him, he just doesn’t feel worthy of starting the act himself. Once they initiate, he’s more than eager to soak up as much touch as he can. He never wants to let go, meaning they can be in one another’s embrace for hours if they’re lucky.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

Reiner is good at compartmentalizing his feelings, so he will run on autopilot and just hope that his s/o is alive so he can see them soon.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

As mentioned earlier, Reiner is more than willing to put his life on the line for his s/o. He would run into a head on attack if it meant giving his loved one a moment longer to breathe. 

[kamyru]

Hi Kamyru! Hope you are doing well...

Can you write a fanfic where Kasumi marries someone else, and not MC?

You can't even imagine how much I wanted to write some angsty fics. So, if anyone has more, I'll be happy to write them. Hope you'll like it. Let's suffer a little. Enjoy! ❤️

P.S. I hope you don't mind that I made another character suffer too.

Shunichiro Tachibana marrying someone else instead of MC (Scenario)

Toshiaki Kijima understanding that he had lost his chance with MC at her wedding with someone else (Scenario)

The first Ayumu and the first choice (Ayumu Shinonome being in love with Hyogo Kaga’s bride) (Scenario)

Kasumi marrying someone else (Scenario)

Part 2 is here

Word counting: 663

MC always thought she had no chances with someone as wonderful as the EICU boss. Dr. Kasumi was the brightest man she had ever met. He was more beautiful than any Renaissance sculpture or painting. The talent he had gathered through his hard work gave her new goals every time she saw him performing surgery. How could someone like her dream about marrying the one and only Doctor Toshiki Kasumi?

Yet, there she was. Near Dr. Kasumi was a young doctor who finished her residency not long ago. Her portfolio was impressive, being one of the best in her university. Though, the country was filled with doctors who were the best in their universities. She wasn't easy to remember, blending in every group she met. The only thing that made her different was her loud voice.

MC looked at soon-to-be Mrs. Kasumi. No, at soon-to-be Dr. Kasumi. They were so alike that everyone who met both of them talked about the other one, insisting on them becoming friends. At first, MC thought that it was a good idea. They would be able to simp on 2D guys while taking breaks from intensive study. They would go shopping and compliment each other taste, a thing that no one else could get. They would give each other tips about how to act near other doctors. They would cheer each other up. They would... Though, none of this happened.

One of the first things MC found out about that other girl was that she was dating Dr. Kasumi. She was dating the same doctor MC didn't dare to confess. She found out that they started dating a few months after MC gave up on the idea of asking him out. She could have succeeded.

MC could have been the one to walk to him in that gorgeous white dress. She could have been the one to wear a matching wedding band the next day. His lips would have been on hers if she had enough courage to tell him that day that she loved him. MC obtained nothing while she heard Sen's speech about what a keeper Kasumi was.

Kasumi's tears weren't shed for MC. Takado's expensive gift wasn't for her blissful future. She didn't feel Hosho's honest hug. Matsunaga didn't give her days off to enjoy the first days of a happy marriage.

One thing that MC obtained was both Dr. Kasumis's friendship. Though, it wasn't enough for her. She wanted to be more than a friend for him and less than a stranger for her.

MC couldn't stay till the end of the wedding. The feeling that someone lied and robbed her was growing inside her heart. She clenched her hand around the resignation letter insider her pocket. Kasumi's happiness was what meant the most to her. Though, she wanted to be the one who gave it to him.

While walking to her lonely apartment, the violet tints of the sky painted her already red cheek. She looked at the sky that reminded her of him. Falling slowly on the cold pavement, MC pressed her hands against her eyes. She didn't want to see it anymore. The world was full of things that reminded her of him. She didn't need them. She didn't need anything.

MC felt someone's big hand on her hair. It couldn't be Kasumi's delicate palm. So, she didn't want to look at the person who tried so hard to ease her pain. If it wasn't Kasumi, she didn't need them.

The man knew about everything. He saw how his subordinate was looking at his boss. He saw how she wrote the resignation letter in the middle of the work-day when Dr. Kasumi invited them to his wedding. He knew what was happening inside her heart because it was the same thing with his heart. Though, he knew better than hoping. MC wouldn't meet Dr. Kasumi again, and he wouldn't meet her again. They had to go through this. But how?

[quercusfloreal]

Le 3e Gédéon

I was hesitating to talk about it but here we go. May I introduce you to the manga "Le 3e Gédéon".

Warning long post

What it's about ?

Manga in 8 volumes, it tells the story of Gédéon Aymé who dreams of becoming a deputy to the Estates General to save the people from misery. George, the Duke of Loire and his former comrade, also seeks to change the system, but instead use violence to achieve his goal. This is going to be a story where the two characters will fight each other, one wanting peace and peaceful change, the other a radical and violent change.

What did I think of it ?

I found the story good. It manages to mix fiction and French revolution. It's full of inconsistencies but somehow it works. However I wouldn’t advise this manga to everyone. There is psychological and physical torture, gore and nudity. The images can sometimes be very crude.

What about historians characters ?

Well, we have the most badass portrayal of Louis I've ever seen in my life, he’s able to detect the slightest lie. Marie Antoinette may seem shallow, but she knows perfectly well how to play her charms to turn the tables in her favor. Their couple is interesting because each of them can't really love the other completely. Madame Roland is an ambitious woman who we learn had a daughter with Gédéon. Saint-Just is the slightly confused teenager who will eventually grow up and assert himself. Charles Philippe, the sociopathic Count of Artois, wants his brother's place and Elisabeth, the king's sister, wants Marie-Antoinette's place.

But what about Robespierre ?

I said in an old conversation that Maxime had daddy issues. Let me explain. One of the main themes of this manga is family and father figures. We learn that Gideon's father is the duke and he has exchanged his son's place with George so that Gédéon can be closer to the people. George has a real grudge against the duke because when Gédéon will be older, he should have become a servant again. But by trapping Gideon he kept his place.

Maxime has a real grudge against his father and George will use this information to manipulate him.

The first time we hear about Robespierre is in the first chapter. George is looking for easily manipulated men who can help him destroy the old system. Saint-Just, recruited by George, tells him that Max would be a potential candidate. Maxime is invited to George's house and has to save a former peasant, now a bandit, from the death penalty because he attacked George. Of course Maxime succeeds but it was a test. Of course, George can’t deny Maxime's skills but I believe it’s hearing the conversation between Maxime and Gédéon about Gédéon’s daughter that made him decide :

Robespierre : Shouldn’t you start trying to be a good family man ? You should leave the Assembly to single people like me !

We see Robespierre again later in a rather amusing scene with Gédéon. Gédéon, drunk, says Saint-Just's erotic writings told the boy is a virgin and is amused. And who is the virgin in the same bar as Gédéon? Boom Maxime !

Their following conversation will confirm that Louis XVI is the father of the kingdom.

Yeah, but when does George act ? Well, Gédéon sees Maxime again when the Estates General stagnate and there is a talk about creating a new assembly. Since Gideon is now part of the King's police force, Maxime asks him if he can meet the King discreetly to solve the problem. But without clearly knowing it, George is already starting to manipulate Maxime.

Keep in mind the puppet representation. It will be important for the next step. Because it’s present when Maxime's words contradict a part of his thoughs and when this thoughs takes controls.

After Gédeon refuses to join Saint-Just, Maxime explains to him, if Gédéon continues to hang out with the royal family, there will be repercussions. And if Gédéon tries to find his lost daughter and make politics at the same time, he will lose both. Because for Maxime, children are burden to their parents. Maxime explains his childhood, his dead mother and his father who left. He is resentful of himself because he believes it was his behavior as a child that made his father disappear, that he was a burden to him. This is why he doesn’t want children.

But underneath this justification, even if he pretends the opposite, he has hatred towards this father who abandoned him.

Gédéon : You have the right to hate your father.

Robespierre : In this case, I have the right to kill him, right ?

On the day of the meeting with the king, on the way to the palace, Maxime admits to Gédéon that his father sends him letters. In this letters, his father talks about his new family. Of course he knows that this is probably a trap, but we feel that it’s a sensitive subject for him.

Robespierre : Over my shoulder, I saw myself when I was ten years old.

Then comes one of my favorite scenes, a scene of tension between Louis XVI and Robespierre. Louis explains there are three locks on the table, if he thinks Maxime is lying, he will break one of them.

Robespierre : Since that time, I have always respected you as a father.

Louis XVI : One...You were warned, lies don't work. Either you don't respect us, or you don't respect the concept of a father.

After two, Maxime admits being one of the instigators of the problems at the Estates General and to make it stop, Necker must be dismissed because he makes promises that the nobility will never accept. Louis accept to think about it.

And here comes the chapter where I most wanted seeing George to lose and die painfully because his plan is totally twisted. Maxime receives a letter from his father who tells him that Henriette might not have died if he had been there, implying that it is Maxime's fault that he left. Then Maxime sees in front of his house a woman abused by a man. He threatens to take him to court but the guy explains that Maxime has nothing to say about the correction of a husband to his wife, named is Henriette...Oh boy !

The next day, Maxime proposes her to leave her husband, that he can help her by offering her a place in the convent of Arras. There, she would be safe. But she refuses because her husband will find her and she is unworthy of his help. Maxime feels unable to do anything. He remembers his dying sister. In the evening, another intermission, but this time Maxime decides to act. He intervenes until the girl confesses her father married her.

At this words, Maxime becomes mad and releases all the hatred he has accumulated towards his father. George's plan to make him forget any peaceful method succeeded

Robespierre now lets his hate guide him. If Louis is the father of the kingdom and the father of his subjects, then he must pay too. He goes to see Necker, tells him to accept his resignation to become a martyr and harangues the assembly to join the people and take up arms. He explains the first attack will be at the Invalides, then the people need to take care of the Bastille afterwards, because it is a royal symbol.

Camille : Maxime notice me !

Gédéon doesn’t agree with Robespierre, he thinks it’s necessary to think of a more peaceful method because it risks having deaths. He no longer recognizes his friend

Robespierre : I assure you Gédéon, I haven’t changed. Gentlemen ! Listen up ! We've been trying to find a resolution through dialogue for a long time! Alas, all our efforts have been in vain...a pure waste of time...and why !?

Robespierre : You too, Gédéon, I bet you've seen abused children love their fathers so much that they fall apart. Gédéon: Yes...

We see him again only after the march of the women on Versailles. Gédéon tells him that George is the one who sent him the letters and played on his dislike for his father to kill the king. He wants to find the wise and peaceful Robespierre.

Gédéon : And this other one love his father.

But Maxime does not believe him. His hatred is still too strong. When another lawyer asks Maxime to save a man, Maxime takes time to think, because the man looks like his father. It’s the words of Saint-Just that convince him to give up this man because he had previously seen the damage caused by the Duke of Loire on his sons George and Gédéon.

Robespierre : He’s a complete stranger, there is no doubt about it !! Saint-Just : Wouldn't it be better if he were really your father? If he were condemned to death, you would be delivered from him.

Saint-Just : Destroying everything to build a new order, that's what I think revolution is !

Finally, Maxime is released when the king died. Gédéon has found the death certificate of his father, confirming Maxime has sent an innocent man to death. Maxime seems to be happy on the day of the king's death but when he saw George and reconised him as the girl he tried to save, everything gets destroyed. He cries because after all he has done, he cannot go back.

Saint-Just embraces Maxime who he’s crying : I will always remain at your side, until death separates us.

The last time we see him is when marie-Antoinette curses him and other revolutionaries at her execution;

I reconize Saint-Just, Robespierre, Desmoulins, Marat ? (right middle), Danton, Hébert, Mme Roland, Augustin ? (bottom right)

[thestraggletag]

Silver Tongue, a Rumbelle fic

Summary: Based on this prompt. Royce Gold is determined to confess his secret feelings towards the librarian. Unable to do it in person he sits down to write a letter but a combination of liquid courage and a determination to truly unburden himself made him perhaps a bit too ardently honest. And a bit careless.

This might have a sequel.

Rating: NC-17 

It had taken a long time to arrive at this point, but now that he’d made the decision Royce Gold was oddly calm, as if having made the decision had magically ended the slow-burning agony he’d been in since the library had opened three years ago. He hadn’t much thought he would be affected by the event, and had privately thought it wouldn’t last. He could not see there being any need for a library in Storybrooke, a town where most people had last held a book in high school, if even then. He had thought it would not last long, one of Regina’s many pet projects that was abandoned when it did not justify its constant spending of town funds.

He had been wrong, in the end, because he hadn’t factored in the librarian. Belle French swept into town with her high-end, short-skirted fashion and noticeable Australian accent and he thought the moment he saw her that she wouldn’t last. Too foreign for a small town like Storybrooke. He had been wrong, though. She had soon made friends with the miners, and Granny and Ruby, and even a few of the teachers from the local school. She also made sure to make the library indispensable, organising book clubs and other after-school activities for the children, offering computer literacy courses for adults and a place for the knitting club to meet, as well as regular table-game nights that surprisingly became wildly popular with certain crowds. And had made Granny an unbearably-cocky backgammon champion, two years running.

So she had stayed, and soon he had begun to notice the danger in it. The way he could not stop staring at her in the diner, or as she walked down the street. They way he got tongue-tied when in her presence, and turned softer, kinder. The way his smirks turned to smiles around her, and he laughed easier. She was smart, and learned, and had a delightful sense of humor. Dark, like his. And yet she was a being of light. Kind, always ready to help, and willing to see beyond the surface. Beyond the drunken escapades of Leroy, or the scandal surrounding Miss Blanchard and Mr Nolan, or his own sordid reputation. And it was that thing that made her so dangerous, how unafraid she was of him, and how determined she seemed to be in getting to know him.

He had been half in love with her before he realised it. The attraction he could deal with- after all, she was a gorgeous woman, and he a man with eyes- but the feelings scared the fuck out of him. It was too late to stop himself, however, so he resigned himself to being a besotted fool… from a safe distance. Only the more they interacted the less he seemed reconciled with the idea until it felt like he was choking on his unexpressed feelings. 

That’s why he had decided, in a fit of uncharacteristic emotional bravery, to unburden himself. Confess his feelings, likely be politely refused, and put an end to the madness. Or perhaps, if fate smiled upon him, be rewarded with a tentative acceptance to a dinner date, and perhaps more. It was always a possibility, albeit a small one, but enough to give him the push he needed.

He had decided it would be best to write her a letter. He got stupidly tongue-tied in her presence, after all, and there was something whimsically old-fashioned about a written letter, which he was sure she would appreciate. So on Friday night, after dinner, he locked himself in his study, fished out his Waldmann Tango and his best stationary, and…

Drew a resounding blank.

It was difficult to start writing with a blank page, he reasoned, so he tried at first simply to write the opening line, immediately falling into a ten-minute debate on whether to address the letter to “Miss French” or “Belle” and what to put in front of it “Dear Miss French”, on one end of the spectrum, seemed too dry and cold, and “Dearest Belle” on the other, too forward and presumptuous.

In the end he decided on “My dear Belle”. There was no point in writing a letter declaring his feelings if he could not even bring himself to call her by her given name and the slightly possessive edge to his greeting might come off as ardent rather than off-putting.

The opening paragraph seemed easy at first: “I am writing to you in order to express certain feelings I am sure have gone unnoticed so far, given the pains I’ve taken to ensure they remained hidden, in part due to our mutual circumstances and standing in town…” yet after a few times reading and re-reading it he had the odd, sinking feeling he might be writing the slightly-more-modern version of Mr Darcy’s ‘In vain I have struggled’ speech and that hadn’t gone over well the first time around. Luckily for him, at least, Belle had no sister he could insult while he was at it. So he scraped it and tried again, but soon felt everything he wrote sounded too formal, stilted and lacking in emotion. He was laying it all down like it was a contract to seal one of his deals, and it was hardly conducive to romance, or reflective of his true feelings.

He stood up, going for the wet bar he kept in the corner of the office. He selected a half-full bottle of Lagavulin and poured himself a generous three fingers into his favourite tumbler, deciding to forgo ice altogether. He needed to loosen up and good Scotch always helped in that. He sat down again, downed the drink in one go, and took another shot at it. He wanted to sound… Passionate, he supposed. It was the whole point of the letter, after all, to confess his true feelings. And his feelings were… ardent. Powerful. All-consuming, at times. Like a small, flickering flame that had slowly built into a veritable inferno. Though he did not wish to frighten her, he did wish to unburden himself and leave her with no doubt regarding his feelings.

“There hasn’t been a day since you arrived in Storybrooke that I haven’t felt your presence in some small way. You’ve taken a permanent residence in my mind and my heart, and there are days when I can scarcely think of anything else. All it takes is a small conversation or even a passing smile and I’m rendered useless.”

He fetched the Scotch from the bar and poured himself another drink, deciding it would be best to leave the bottle nearby. He felt he was finally getting into the groove of things, building up to something that sounded less like a legal clause. He downed his second Scotch, feeling the pleasant burn as it travelled down his throat, and took his pen again.

“You need not be concerned if you do not share my feelings. I will respect whatever decision you make. I simply wanted to tell you of the warmth you inspire in me, the way you’ve torn through all the walls I’ve built between myself and the rest of the world. And yet I know you to be, above all things, kind. More beautiful on the inside that you are on the outside, if that’s at all possible. I know that I am safe in your hands, whether you choose to give me a chance or not. Thank you for treating an old beast with kindness and humanity and know that, no matter what the outcome is, you have a friend and an ally across the street from the library, if there is ever anything you need.”

He signed it simply “Yours” because it felt apt. He certainly felt hers, in any case. Below he signed his name, trying to make his signature a bit more whimsical, give it a tad more flourish. Afterwards he stretched, poured himself another drink, and read it. It was… Good. Not too dry, not too passionate. Solid. Respectful but a good representation of his feelings at the same time.

Well… to an extent. He gulped down his third glass of Scotch and poured himself another, ruefully acknowledging that the letter was not quite honest. It was a bit restrained. Or a lot restrained. It felt like the gentlemanly thing to do, to tone down some of the more unbecoming feelings, keep those more intimate urges locked up for the time being. But perhaps, he mused, he could let loose a bit, to try and see if a more emotionally-honest letter would actually be preferable.

He could tell her, perhaps, a bit more about how it was hard for him to keep his eyes off her when they were in the same room. How utterly beautiful she was, small enough to make him wanna crowd her in, whisk her away somewhere and lean over her, feeling her breath on his neck. How he adored her high heels and flirty skirts and wished nothing more than to-

He removed his tie, and scratched out that last sentence, automatically fishing for his drink to try and cool himself down. He was beginning to get inappropriate and, anyway, he did not wish to come across as if he was solely enamoured with her physical appearance. Though he very much was enraptured by it, it was her personality that had made him fall for her. Things like her kindness, her understanding, her insatiable curiosity. He wished to share everything with her. Wanted to teach her all the secrets of his trade, have deep discussions on books they mutually liked, bare his soul to her inquisitive eyes.

“In my dreams, over and over, I am a willing slave to your curiosity, your insatiable need to explore and experience. When I close my eyes I see us in every way two people can be together, entwined till it’s impossible to decipher where I end and you begin. You let me press my mouth against every inch of you, drink from your cunt till I’m satiated, but it’s never enough. I wish to vainly attempt to quench your curiosity anywhere and everywhere you’ll let me, at any time of day. Over and over till neither of us can walk and I cannot remove your scent from my fingers, my mouth, my cock.”

He stared at the paragraph, head tilted to the side. The paper looked a bit blurry, so he checked to make sure he was wearing his glasses. He was. Odd. He reached out for his glass of Scotch, surprised that it was empty. He refilled it, noticing the bottle felt surprisingly light. He re-read the paragraph, trying to figure out if it was a bit too risqué. But, he reasoned, Belle was risqué, in her attire, in her reading choices. Sure she would appreciate him being the same, going out of his comfort sort in order to convey the depth of his affection.

“I dream of fucking you for hours on end. Slowly, with the care and thoroughness you deserve, till we’re both numb and spent. I want to make you ache in places where the pain bleeds into pleasure, and convince you that only I am worthy of making you come. That none of the boys you might have had between your lovely legs were worth a second look. I want to become your favourite toy, there for whenever you might need me, eager to please, to make you sigh and moan and keen till you are hoarse.”

He was hard, he noticed, but it was hardly a surprise, though he thought he might have drunk a bit too much for his body to rise to the occasion. He thought about touching himself for the briefest second, but quickly dismissed the idea. He was on a writing roll, it wouldn’t do to jeopardise that. Instead he poured himself another glass of Scotch, surprised when he had to tip the bottle all the way. He didn’t remember drinking enough to empty it, but he must have. Shrugging, he turned his attention back to the letter.

“I want to take you against the stacks of the library, amidst the books you love so much. I want to fuck you in the backroom of my shop so your smell lingers there. I want to go down on you in my bed for ours, till the silk sheets are ruined beyond repair. I want to consume you anywhere, everywhere, knowing that I will never be truly satiated, that it will never be enough. Have you splayed across my dining room table so I could eat you out as many times as I wanted, as much as you needed. I want to do everything to you, and have you do everything to me, till I can’t scrub you from my skin, the same way I cannot seem to be able to erase you from my heart and my mind.”

It was a bit of a sappy ending, but he supposed it balanced the more physical emotions out. He signed his name at the bottom with a flourish, smiled in satisfaction and staggered to his feet, determined to make it to his bedroom. He would get a good night’s sleep, wake up refreshed, and deliver the letter personally first thing in the morning.

In the morning, once he was done throwing up and had managed to shower, he shook his head at the idea he could’ve ever thought he would wake up anything other than terribly hungover. He popped a couple of aspirin, forced himself to swallow a few bites of dry toast, and dressed himself for the day. Before going out the door he remembered the letter, wincing when he recalled specifically the second draft he had made, clearly in a state of drunken foolishness. He picked up the sheets of paper, thinking for a second about ripping them up. He stopped himself at the last minute, though. The letter might not be fit to ever be seen by Belle, but he fancied the idea of rereading it later. He folded it neatly into an envelope and fetched a second one for the original, much more suitable letter. He would slip that one underneath the library’s door on his way to the shop. 

He was startled by his home phone ringing, picking up to see it was the tip on the estate sale he had been waiting for. He jotted down the necessary information, went back to his desk to retrieve the letter and was out the door a few seconds later. He hurried to the library and, before he could convince himself otherwise, slipped the envelope with the letter underneath the doors, feeling a mixture of relief and anxiety afterwards. He had done it, and though he felt unbearably nervous about the whole thing, he was proud of himself for following through.

Or he was, until he opened what he thought was the unsuitable letter and realised it was the original first draft. He had switched them up by mistake. Ice flooded his veins, and he felt like someone had punched him in the gut, leaving him gasping for breath. This couldn’t be happening. Not to him, not with Belle. The more he thought about it the more his mind recalled fragments of the letter, lingering in its uncouth language and vivid imagery. He was fucked, totally and completely.

Unless…

Maybe she hadn’t opened the letter yet. Or she had, but hadn’t gotten around to read it all. The first page or so was quite reserved. Perhaps he could sneak into the library and retrieve the rest, or swap it for the correct letter. He had the keys to the library, as it was his property, rented by the town. It would feel and likely be a terrible violation of the librarian’s private space, even though he did not intend to go beyond the library, but it would be worse to allow her to be submitted to such basic thoughts as the ones he had written down the other night. 

With that in mind he took the library keys from his safe and went out into the night. Storybrooke, being a small town, was deserted at that time, which was a blessing. Less people to see him slip inside the library using the back door, or hear him as he rummaged around inside, trying to be quiet and not use his phone flashlight, lest that alert Belle upstairs in her apartment somehow. Tentatively he made his way to her office, sure she would have surely put the letter, hopefully unsealed. But when he got close he noticed light coming through the windows of the office, where the blinds were partially-lowered. It seemed that, given his fucking luck, Miss French was still diligently toiling away doing something or the other for the library. Nevermind. He would take a discrete peek, to see if he at least spotted his letter atop her desk, and if he did he would hide in some shadowy corner of the library and wait her out. If he didn’t he would cut his losses and go back home, to try and figure out how he was ever going to face Belle again. 

He approached silently, drawing one of the slats down to peer inside. He spotted Belle right away, leaning back on her office chair with an ottoman propping her feet up. She was reading something and for a moment he appreciated her face, eyes focused on the page, cheeks slightly flushed and lips parted. Then he registered the rest, the shirt tossed above the desk along with her bra, the black silk camisole making her hardened nipples visible and her left hand, which disappeared somewhere beneath her rucked-up skirt. She sighed, head rolling back as she whispered something.

He didn’t know what registered first, whether it was the fact that she was saying his name or that it was his letter she was reading, clutched tightly to her right hand. There was no doubt as to what she was doing, and yet he could hardly believe that Belle fucking French was bringing herself to orgasm in her office while reading his letter. He pinched himself, unwilling to believe he was seeing what he was seeing, but the sting felt all too real. It wasn’t a dream, it was, somehow, reality. Sweet, sweet reality.

He needed to get out. As much as he burned to just burst into the office and let his mouth do what Belle’s fingers were attempting, it wouldn’t do. By some miracle she was not offended or otherwise put off by his risqué letter, but she sure would be by him breaking into the library. Offended and perhaps scared, unsafe, which was the last thing he wanted her to feel, especially in his presence. He would sneak out, quietly, and swing by the library tomorrow afternoon, right after closing time. As much as it would embarrass him to bring up his letter he would know she reciprocated his feelings, or that at least she was open to them, and that would give him the courage needed to ask her out. 

It was a solid plan, a great plan. And it would’ve worked, he was sure, if he hadn’t knocked over a banker lamp as he backed away from her office. The  antique bronze made a horrible noise as it collided with the floor, and the green shade shattered upon impact, making a mess.

“Who’s there?”

Fuck.

[inthewild-flowers]

Number 8 for the confession prompts with wolfstar? I have an angst deficit rn 🥲

prompt 8 was “don’t you see that there are people who care about you? that I care about?” hope u enjoy ur angst!!

“You can’t be leaving again!”

“I am.”

“Why?”

“Because Dumbledore wants me to.”

“And you just do anything Dumbledore says?”

“Right now? Yes.”

Remus still hadn’t turned around. Sirius needed him to turn around. He needed to see Remus’s face, because underneath all his anger was the worry that this might be the last time he saw Remus. He might not come back from this mission.

As if he could read Sirius’s thoughts, Remus turned to face him and said, “I’m going to be okay.”

“How do you know that?”

Remus didn’t answer. He turned back around and picked up his quill to continue writing his letter. Sirius hated his silence, his resignation. Would it really be so hard to just tell Dumbledore no? He voiced that thought, and Remus sighed.

“I can’t,” he said.

“Why?” Sirius’s voice was getting loud, but he didn’t care.

Remus turned around again, giving Sirius his full focus. “You know how much I owe Dumbledore. He got me into Hogwarts, he’s the reason I’ve had any sort of a decent life these past few years! So yes, when he asks for favours, I’m going to say yes.”

“There’s a million other things you could be doing! Why the werewolves? Why would he send you there, of all places? Why would you go?”

“It’s where I’m most useful, Sirius.” Remus sounded tired, defeated. Sirius hated it.

“It’s also where you’re most in danger!”

“And why should anyone care about that? I’m the best for this because no one would fucking miss me if I died!”

Sirius took a step back. “What the fuck, Remus?”

“I’m right.”

“Don’t you––don’t you see that there are people who care about you? That I care about you?”

Remus turned back to his letter. “You shouldn’t.”

“Fucking hell Remus, what do I have to say to convince you it’s true? I love you, and I don’t mean just as a friend I mean––I mean it in whatever way you’ll have me. I love you, Remus, far too much for my own good, and I need you to come back to me.”

Sirius watched Remus’s shoulders stiffen. He folded up his letter and tied it to his owl’s leg, then sent it out the window. He didn’t look at Sirius.

“Remus?” Sirius whispered.

“I have to go,” Remus said. He pushed past Sirius to get to the door. Just before he left he paused, and, with his back to Sirius, he said, “You shouldn’t love me. It’s not worth it. Especially now.” Then he closed the door behind him, and Sirius was left to stand there and try to hold back his tears.

On the other side of the door, Remus’s own tears had already begun to fall.

[gameofdrarry]

Wizards Hearts Recs: Holiday Fic

Wizards Hearts was a four-month-long Drarry reading fest. Players were given a playing deck of 52 tropes, and were asked to find 52 different fics to read and comment on to fill their decks. To prevent the same few fics from being read, fics were restricted to only being used for the game three times before being considered ineligible for further points. The tropes and submissions list can be found here.

Check out the masterlist of fics for this trope below the cut!

📜 East of Eden by  WriteSprite Rated:  Explicit Words:  41,122 Tags:  Explicit Sexual Content, Explicit Language, Parseltongue, Dirty Talk, Rimming, Biting, Drinking Games Summary:  When Harry receives a dodgy brochure for an island vacation, he isn't sure he should attend. After a bit of a push, he decides to go for it and winds up spending the week in paradise. At least it would be, if it weren't for that pesky blond git. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Take My Hand by daisymondays Rated:  Explicit Words:  12814 Tags: Summer, Summer Romance, Pining, Mutual Pining, Getting Together, First Kiss, Drinking Games, Harry Potter Has Dimples, Draco Malfoy Can't Cope, Fluff, Sharing a Bed, Auror Partners, Draco Has Feels To Spare, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Flirting, Friends to Lovers, Meddling Friends, Touching, Soooo Much Touching, HP: EWE Summary:  Draco has long resigned himself to pining after Harry... that is until an invite on the annual Ministry holiday gives him a chance to change everything. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 December Never Felt So Wrong by MaesterChill Rated:  Explicit Words:  50001 Tags: Post-Hogwarts, Angst, Mystery, time skip, 00's Music Sung Badly, Fluff, Amnesia, A niffler, 25 Days of Draco and Harry 2018, curse magic, Knitting, Sex, Cuddles, Blow Jobs, First Time Sex, wanking, Advent Fic, Christmas, Magical Artifacts, Falling In Love, Magical Theory, drarry dads, Rimming, Memory Loss, A tiny bell, Sharing a Bed, Dad Jokes, Cursed objects Summary:  'Twas the month before Christmas and sixteen year old Draco Malfoy had never felt worse. His attempts to kill Dumbledore were failing and, as usual, Harry Fucking Potter was a constant thorn in his side. All that suddenly changed when Draco woke up 15 years in the future and discovered that not only was he allegedly shagging Harry Fucking Potter, he also had thinning hair and a five year old son, and no fucking clue how he got there. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Tell Me the End at the Beginning by harryromper Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  36591 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Hogwarts, St Mungo's Hospital, Healer Draco Malfoy, Auror Harry Potter, Auror Hermione Granger, Christmas, Christmas Tree, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Christmas Presents, Christmas Decorations, 25 Days of Harry and Draco, Food Hall Turkeys, Advent Calendar, Healer Luna Lovegood, Kreacher, Minor Neville Longbottom/Ginny Weasley, Yule Logs, Misheard Christmas carols Summary:  St Mungo’s is the last place anyone wants to spend the festive season. Harry finds himself there anyway. Or: Harry's an Auror suspended from duty, Malfoy's wearing the hell out of three-piece suits, Hermione is entirely over everything, and Kreacher just wants to be left alone to decorate for Christmas. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Too Cold Outside (For Angels to Fly) by gracerene Rated:  Explicit Words:  62688 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Second War with Voldemort, Post-Hogwarts, Creature Fic, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Veela Draco Malfoy, Veela (Harry Potter), Auror Partners, Auror Harry Potter, Auror Draco Malfoy, Aurors, Case Fic, Murder Mystery, Mild Gore, Advent Calendar, Christmas, Drinking, Scotland, United Kingdom, Muggle London, POV Alternating, Coffee Shops, Past Character Death, Past Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Minor Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Minor Dean Thomas/Ginny Weasley, Crime Fighting, Duelling, Burns, Blood and Injury, Bars and Pubs, Getting Together, Romance, Light Angst, Happy Ending, Bisexual Harry Potter, Gay Draco Malfoy, Anal Sex, Riding, Shower Sex, Hand Jobs, 25 Days of Harry and Draco, 25 Days of Harry and Draco 2019, Switching, Wings, Wing Kink, Veela Mates, Mating Bond, Anal Fingering, Bonding, Dirty Talk Summary:  The Auror Department and the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures are working to create a new division partnering human wizards and Magical Beings in order to more effectively police crime involving any and all classifications of Magical Creature. Auror Harry Potter jumps at the chance to join the pilot programme, but he starts to regret his rashness when he discovers who he's to be partnered with: Draco Malfoy. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 If the Fates Allow by Saras_Girl Rated:  Mature Words:  80957 Tags: N/A Summary:  What's that crackling in the walls? Harry has no clue at all. He'll eat some cake and drink some wine Because he is completely FINE. --A story about life's disregard for our plans. [2017 advent story] ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 A New Peace by MalenkayaCherepakha Rated:  Explicit Words:  5566 Tags: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Semi-Public Sex Summary:  Of all the people Draco expected to walk into his cafe in Muggle London, Harry Potter was not one of them. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 flashback, warm nights by warmfoothills Rated:  Mature Words:  13068 Tags: Deathly Hallows AU, or more specifically, the godric’s hollow christmas shitshow of 1997, but with ron and draco!, and no snake-animated corpses!, instead:, Grand theft auto, a lot of blood, teenage fugitives, a time loop, Horcrux Hunting, one psychopathic quinquagenarian, Bodily Injuries, the ~power of love, Breaking and Entering, hospital food, questionable headwear, kissing in the backseat, kissing in the freezer aisle, Kissing in the Snow Summary:  “What’s killing me is that I actually quite fucking like Christmas, festival-for-a-personally-irrelevant-religion-turned-commercialised-garbage-holiday though it may be, and now I’m stuck in the perpetual almost-there of it all with an idiot who gets himself cut up every time no matter how differently I try and do things!” “Killing you?” Potter asks. “I thought I was the one who’s about to get my torso sliced into?” ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 All Must Draw Near by Saras_Girl Rated:  Mature Words:  61080 Tags: N/A Summary:  Harry doesn't have time for rumours; he has a shop to run. Which is just as well, really. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 With A Little Help From Hermione by naarna Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  6983 Tags: N/A Summary:  Secret Santa at Hogwarts with every House participating in the name of unity... And Hermione suddenly finds herself in the position of a matchmaker. ❤️ Read on Fanfiction.net

📜 Faint Indirections  by ignatiustrout Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  29793 Tags: University, Wizarding World of the United States of America, Americans, Post-Second War with Voldemort, Librarian Harry Potter, Harry Potter Has a Pet Snake, Parselmouth Harry Potter, College Student Draco Malfoy, Redeemed Draco Malfoy, Anxious Harry Potter, Baby Gay Draco Malfoy, Bisexual Harry Potter, Friendship, Family Dinners, Halloween parties, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Romance, Misunderstandings, Internalized Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, H/D Fan Fair 2019, Secondary Theme: Book Fair Summary: Draco Malfoy is the last person Harry expects to turn up in Boston, Massachussetts. But now he's here, and he won't stop requesting books from the library where Harry works. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The 12 Dates of Draco  by Drarryismymuse (Hatchersn) Rated:  Explicit Words:  16808 Tags: 12 Days of Christmas, Light Angst, Christmas Smut, Anal Sex Summary:  Holiday dialing, desperate attempts at reconciliation, and 12 blind dates with Draco Malfoy... oh my! OR The day Harry just can't seem to get past. But what is the universe trying to tell him? And when did Draco Malfoy get so bloody fit? He's got 12 days to figure it out. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Christmas Is For Sex (and Love), So Give It To Me by GoldenTruth813 Rated:  Explicit Words:  53218 Tags: PWP, Established Relationship, Christmas, Bondage, misuse of frosting, making gingerbread houses, coming without touching, Blowjobs, Fingering, anal penetration, Rimming, misuse of fairy lights, Praise Kink, Nipple Clamps, erotic massages, Lingerie, Harry in Lingerie, Butt Plugs, Masterbation, Dirty Talk, Overstimulation, Topping from the Bottom, Ice Play, misuse of snowballs, misuse of brandy custard, veritasium, Public Sex, misuse of christmas candles, Wax Play, floating blow jobs, bubble baths, Candy Canes, misuse of candy canes, sex with feelings, Clubbing, naughty letters, babysitting teddy, Edging, healing past trauma, really so much more than sex, but lots of sex too, spiked hot cocoa, Drunk confessions, Anal penetration with a foreign object, french!draco, Switching Summary:  Draco buys Harry an Advent House, intent on helping Harry create all new holiday memories, and have a lot of great sex in the process. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 As it Should Be by leo_draconis Rated:  Mature Words:  5670 Tags: N/A Summary:  It's Christmas Eve, and Draco's world has just shattered around him. Will a Christmas miracle give him a second chance? ❤️ Read on LJ

📜 Dream by the Fire  by GallifreyisBurning Rated:  Mature Words:  11431 Tags: Fluff, Christmas Fluff, Non-Explicit Sex, No Angst, seriously no angst whatsoever, Getting to Know Each Other, Getting Together, Coffee Shop Owner Harry Potter, Writer Draco Malfoy, Tattooed Draco Malfoy, Magical Tattoos, Memory Magic, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Wizarding History (Harry Potter), Friends to Lovers Summary:  When Draco Malfoy resurfaces in England after eight years abroad—tattooed, pierced, and wanting to take over a corner of Harry's coffee shop to work on a writing project—Harry can't help but be intrigued. Where has he been? What is he working on? Why here? And why does he have to look so stupidly hot with all those tattoos? ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The best Christmas he ever had by gnarf Rated:  Teen And Up Words:  1965 Tags: Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, Post-War, Fred Weasley Lives, Christmas at the Burrow (Harry Potter), Mutual Pining, Drinking, Dancing, Family Feels Summary:  Christmas had never been less appealing to him than this year. That was until Arthur Weasley showed up at his door, dressed as Santa, inviting him to the Burrow. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The One Where Ginny Keeps a Secret, Sort of  by Theartfulldodger Rated:  Teen And Up Words:  4039 Tags:  Fluff, Christmas, Established Relationship, Non-Linear Narrative, Group Vacation Summary:  Harry is determined to have a good time with Ginny and Pansy for a trip to NYC over the winter holidays, even if Draco can't join them. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Adventures in Truth and Texting by fluxweed Rated:  Explicit Words:  7981 Tags: Texting, Drunk Texting, Sexting, Veritaserum, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Auror Harry Potter, Drinking, Christmas, Advent Fic, Awkwardness, everyone has phones, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE Summary:  Former Death Eaters are being targeted with a Veritaserum curse – it’s permanent, and makes victims speak aloud their every thought. Luckily, it’s easier to control when writing – and Hermione is trying to introduce Muggle technology to the wizarding world. An advent fic featuring texting, identity struggles, and a Draco Malfoy who will literally not stop talking. ❤️ Read on AO3

[liss-99]

Hey, I saw your post about Taylor Swift prompts. Could you write Colin/Penelope + Paper Rings? Or Hey Stephen? Or Enchanted?

I think Hey Stephen fits them so well!!!! Here you go :)

Penelope never considered that the man she’d one day fall in love with would also catch the attention of other young ladies. But, at sixteen, when she realized the dashing Colin Bridgerton had captured her heart as well as many other girls’, she resigned to just be his friend. She’d been convinced she was not a worthy marriage match by the Ton, so instead, she would enjoy being in Colin’s presence however she could. He deserved all of the happiness in the world, and if that meant being with someone other than her, Penelope was determined to see him to it. 

Despite his good looks and charms, many people regarded Colin Bridgerton as nothing more than a third-born son. Penelope, however, saw a light in him that she thought others didn’t. He was intelligent, funny, charismatic, adventurous. So much more than a third son. 

She wanted to express that to him whenever possible, but she often found herself not saying half the things she wanted to when she walked with him. His stories and livelihood captured her and made her fall more in love with him. How she wished he would realize that of all the girls tossing rocks at his windows, she would be the one that was waiting there even when it was cold. 

With Colin, even as his friend, it was not difficult for her to imagine that she wouldn’t always be alone. So often, she wanted to just grab him and tell him how she thought he looked like an angel, or how she wanted nothing more than to kiss him in the rain and make him feel the magic she’d been feeling since she met him, and especially how she couldn’t help but feel there was no one else for her. 

One day, she even wrote her feelings down in a letter. With the feeling of paper under her hand, she wrote: 

“Hey Colin, I’ve been holding back this feeling, so I’ve got some things to say to you. I’ve seen it all, so I’ve thought that I’d never seen anybody shine the way you do. The way you walk, the way you talk, the way you say my name. Colin, it’s beautiful, wonderful, don’t you ever change. I know people are always leaving, but I think you and I should stay the same.” 

It was a letter she never sent but instead kept in her desk drawer. 

For years, she let her feelings for Colin fester, silently keeping them to herself, writing him notes she never sent. But one day, something deep within her compelled her that they were meant to be together. Penelope felt in her soul that she needed to confess her love for him. She grabbed the stack of letters that had piled up in her desk and darted out of her house. The street lamps were dimming and the rain was pouring down, glistening the streets in a hazy mist. 

She marched over to his lodgings and knocked on the door. When he opened it, she drew in a quick breath and let the feelings of so many years pour out. 

“Colin, you’re perfect for me. I could give you 50 reasons why I should be the one you choose. All of those other girls, I know they’re beautiful, but would they write all these letters for you,” she said, revealing the hundreds of letters she had written for him. She expected him to be confused, but instead, a wide grin took over Colin’s face. 

“Took you long enough,” he laughed before he grabbed her hand and drug her out into the dim streets, kissing her in the rain like she’d always imagined. 

Taylor Swift Bridgerton One-Shots

[chiefest-and-greatest-calamity]

Chapter Twenty-Eight: Cracked

Genre: Slow burn, I think

Pairing: Miya Osamu x f!reader

Warnings: Grief

A/N: I have been wanting to start writing again for weeks, but between physical therapy, surgery, and school, I have not had any motivation. Finals are officially over, but I’m still in the early stages of recovery so I cannot promise I’ll be able to post more :((

Prev. Masterlist

Hearing it on a breeze behind strangers felt awful. Hearing it from the mouth of a friend made the world spin around you. You wanted to find who started it and deal with them before the team had heard it, but why would you be so lucky? 

“..is that true?” The question sounded so loud and it echoed in your chest.

“No! Of course not!” The nausea was nearly overwhelming. You knew the rumor was so far from the truth, but what would that matter if no one believed you? Your sight was becoming distorted by the tears that were threatening to fall. Before you could process anything, your body ran you out of the room and into the bathroom where you put your breakfast into the first toilet available. 

There was a silence that fell into the place you stood. The team knew how vicious rumors could be and they all trusted you, but after their last manager, there was hesitancy to dismiss it. 

Osamu remembers the look in your eyes when you showed up on his doorstep the night you confessed. There was nothing about it that held a secret. He remembers how apprehensive you were about starting a relationship with him. He knows that you are not the kind of person to do something like that, but rumors start from somewhere. 

You went home before first period, claiming illness. You could not face the twins, nor the team, after what had happened. You knew what you had to do; there were no other options on the table. 

How long did you stare at your phone? How many times did you rewrite that text message? You didn’t want to do this. You didn’t want to give up the things that gave you a reason to get up in the morning, but you had to. 

You cried yourself into dry heaving as you sent your resignation to Kita. You couldn’t possibly turn in a physical resignation letter. You weren’t even able to leave your bed and when it came to sending a text to Osamu…

Your phone was across the room, underneath a dent in the drywall. The screen was shattered, the LCD a painting of color blocks with its ugly colors flashing against the wall with every text and call sent to your phone, but you couldn’t answer them. 

You didn’t text Osamu after you had sent in your resignation. Your body reacted to the thought of drafting a breakup message by throwing your phone as hard as it could across the room before crumbling on your floor and forcing out the last bits of water left in your body. You gave up one thing you loved; you weren’t ready to give up another. 

You found yourself sitting in your dad’s closet, wrapped tightly in your mom’s old robe. You’ve been living in disbelief that she’s really gone, but that denial has been ripped from you. You’ve never been through anything without her. Being surrounded by the faint smell left by her without her there made the ache in your chest turn into burning pain. How are you supposed to make it through this if she’s not here with you? How are you supposed to do anything without her? 

Even without tears, sobs trashed your body. Your voice was beginning to grow hoarse. Your dad wouldn’t be home until it was late, allowing you more time than you needed to unabashedly cry until you could no longer stay awake. 

The sun was setting when you exited your dad’s room, leaving your living room and kitchen in a blue haze. In the dim light, you accidentally kicked one of your cats, resulting in a broken meow. You started crying again when you saw the look of betrayal on their face.

Next

[oceanera12]

Linked Wilderness (Part 3)

Part 1

Part 2

Wild get’s the present of his sister. And then she gives him a present.

Alright! This is the last focus on Wild I SWEAR. You are not the only boy I need to make suffer.

It was a week since her brother and traveling buddies had left, when she got the letter. How she got said letter was a mystery in itself (mail had been a bit spotty since the Calamity), and she had no idea how it was coming through time but there it was!

The letter was short and sweet.

“Rhea, Wind told me that I need to start writing you. I told him I do not know if these will even find you, but the postman hasn’t failed us yet so here we go. Things have been pretty quiet with us. Killed a few moblins, but nothing too major. I hope you are well. Wild Link”

Rhea felt like jumping for joy. She hurriedly wrote a response.

...before realizing she had no idea how to mail it to him.

-------------------------------------------------------

Wild was surprised when the postman arrived with two letters for him. One was from Flora. The other was Rhea’s. Wild opened it very carefully, Twilight on one side and Wind on the other.

“Dear Link, Normally, I would ask how a letter from you reached me here. But with everything I heard during your visit, I suppose it is not the craziest thing I have heard. Or seen. I am doing well, thank you for your concern. The neighbors brought me an apple pie yesterday. I shared it with Epona.”

Twilight scoffed. “You two spoil that horse.”

“And you don’t?”

“Just read, cub.”

“I found myself wandering outside the village the other day. Do not worry, I stayed away from Guardians and hid whenever monsters came by. I know how to take care of myself. It was quite peaceful. I see why you enjoy traveling. I am placing this note on my doorstep, along with a baked apple. However your letter arrived, I hope this one will find its way to you. Rhea.”

-------------------------------------------------------------

“Rhea, Twilight is very disappointed in you for sharing the pie. I cannot say the same because I would do the same thing. Wind wants me to ask about any embarrassing stories from my childhood. I would prefer to hear the not so embarrassing ones. Link.”

--------------------------------------------------------------

“Dear Link, To prevent Wind’s temper, I will share one of each. When you were five years old, you climbed a tree as high as you could. And then you were too afraid to climb down. Father would not help you down. He told you that you had to conquer your fears. You were stuck up there until the sun started to go down. And then you jumped out of the tree with a korok leaf. To this day, I still do not know how you did not die, or even break a bone. The first time you ever taught me to cook, you showed me how to make baked apple. I had difficulty with it and ended up burning most of the apples. By the end of our lesson we had one “good” apple. The rest were a dry, burned, lump. We ended up sharing the good one. I thought I would tell you that monster activity has started to go down the past week or so. Not enough for people to travel, but enough to notice. So whatever infection is spreading through the monsters, it does not seem to be here. Rhea.”

---------------------------------------------------------

“Rhea, Your last letter earned me a scolding from both Time and Twilight about my reckless nature. Wind and Legend could not stop laughing for ten minutes. Wind would like more stories. I am resigned to whatever my fate is. I am happy to hear you do not have to deal with the infected. They are rather a pain. Link” P.S.- The postman will arrive soon so I do not have a lot of time. I finished this letter last night. In my dreams I remembered baking apples with you. You used to wear a bright pink dress, right? It had a white flower design.

-----------------------------------------------------------

“Dear Link, Yes, I did wear a pink dress with white flowers. I must admit, when I read you remembered something about me, I felt very happy. I know you cannot control what you can and cannot remember. But I cannot stop the hope of you remembering more. Call me selfish, but I want you to have a family you can remember. If not ours, then the current one you are in. I do not know if you remember Fenton, your old Knight friend. He was a year or so younger then you and wanted to be a knight in the service to the king. But he was born with one leg twisted so badly, it is impossible for him to walk long distances. You still taught him the best you could in swordplay and archery. The reason I bring him up is he just got married this past week. The girl is not from Hateno so no need to worry yourself on her. I went hunting and found a deer for their wedding feast (and also my present to the happy couple). Your sister, Rhea.”

----------------------------------------------------

“Dear Rhea, You must be wondering why I have not written in over a month. The answer is complicated. To keep it short, let’s just say I am having quite the adventure. My dreams have been a lot of memories lately. It took a bit, but I remembered Fenton... at least, I remembered a memory with Fenton. I remember teaching him archery and thinking he was quite good. If only the army had let him try, I am sure he could have made an excellent archery captain. Then again, it is probably for the best he missed the war. The likelihood of him surviving the Guardians would be very low and then we would not be talking about his wedding. I remembered something with you, a few nights back. You woke me up from my dreams because of a nightmare. I let you sleep with me so you knew that the monsters would not get you. It felt familiar. Did that happen a lot? Your brother, Link”

-------------------------------------------------------

“Dear Link, Yes, I had many nightmares and you let me sleep with you when I was afraid. I am embarrassed to say that I still wake up afraid. I have the remains of an old cloak of yours and use it as a blanket, during those nights. It is falling apart now, but I cannot bear to throw it away. The monster’s are increasing again. I had to take out a few that came too close to the village. Fenton helped from a distance. He still in an excellent shot and one of the best archers in town (excluding me, of course). Your sister, Rhea”

------------------------------------------------------

“Rhea, I remembered mother last night. She was showing me how to make bread in the coals of a fire. She was also coughing a lot. Link. P.S.- I am sending you another one of my cloaks to replace the old one.”

------------------------------------------------------

“Dear Link, Mother died from an illness the doctors did not know how to treat. She was sick for the last year of her life, with the last few months being bedridden. She loved you very much and would be proud of you today. I know that I am. Thank you for the cloak. I will take it with me everywhere I go for the rest of my life. Love, Rhea.”

--------------------------------------------------------

“Dear Rhea, This letter has a surprise for you on the next page. I hope you like it. Four, Warriors, and I almost burned down a forest yesterday. Time and Twilight were not happy. It helped me remember that time I almost burned down the house. Father and Mother were not pleased with me. Or you. You had something to do with it, didn’t you? Love, Link.”

“To Rhea, Sister of the Champion We never got to meet, to my deepest regrets. I am writing to thank you for your sacrifices to the kingdom of Hyrule. I am sorry that I was unable to stop the Calamity from claiming your brother and father from you. I am also sorry you will never get to see the land free from the Calamity. I am sending a picture I have of your brother from the Sheikah Slate. It is not much, but I pray that having an image of him will help you remember him for who he is. Link mentioned that he ran into you on his current adventure. It is fascinating that these portals not only travel between different worlds but also times. I wish I could study them, but alas, Link has forbade me from getting near them. Apologies, I got off track. Along with the photo, I am sending 500 rupees. Link is not happy with this gift, but I insisted upon it. Please use it for whatever you wish. Rhea... you did make a difference to Link. I am grateful for your help, past and future. I thank you for your devotion to the kingdom. At your service, Princess Zelda”

---------------------------------------------------------

“Dear Link, Please thank the Princess for the letter, photo, and the rupees. I confess, I was actually in dire need of some. My bow is getting old and I know it is going to break soon. Weapons are not cheap in these times. And before you get any ideas, you are not sending me any of your bows. I already bought one from a traveling Rito. The remaining rupees I gave to Fenton and his wife. He confided to me that his wife is expecting. I am very excited for them. As for almost burning of the house down: I have no idea what you mean. I certainly had nothing to do with it. And nothing will get me to say otherwise. Link, I am leaving you something under the floorboards of the house. Consider it a final gift from your little sister. All my love, Rhea.”

-------------------------------------------------------

“Dear Rhea, I do not know when I will be home in my time again, but I will be sure to stop by the house. I look forward to seeing your gift. I remembered something. I think it was the last day we spent with Mother and Father. We had a picnic outside. Father carried Mother to the blanket and we spent the day playing games and making food. When night came, we looked at the stars and we fell asleep hugging Mother. When we woke up, she was home in the sky. Love, Link”

----------------------------------------------------

Dear Rhea, It has been a week since my last letter and I am still waiting your response. But I thought I would share with you that I remembered the last time I saw you. Before the Calamity. I will not remind you of that day’s events. But I will tell you that I was very sad to leave you and Father. I hope Hylia will unite us again on the journey. If not, then I am grateful I was able to see you again. Love, Link”

----------------------------------------------------

Dear Rhea, It has been almost a month since your last letter. Is everything alright in Hateno? Last night, I made everyone Mother’s stew. I remembered the recipe... or at least most of it. Call it my version, I suppose. Wind would like me to ask you for more embarrassing stories. Please write soon. Love, Link

--------------------------------------------------------

Rhea, I am getting worried. You still have not written back. It has been over a month now. Please let me know that you are okay. Link

---------------------------------------------------------

Dear Rhea, The postman has informed me that my letters have not moved from the porch of the house. He has returned them to me, with the promise that he is looking for where you are now. Rhea, I am scared. Please let me know you are okay. Your brother, Link.

----------------------------------------------------------

The moment Wild’s slate began to ping, Wild pulled it out and quickly tapped a few things. “I’m teleporting to Hateno. Any objections?”

No one did. Time pointed at the nearby stable. “We’ll stay there for the night. If you are not back by morning, we will be coming after you.”

“Agreed.” Wild tapped a few more things before vanishing in a trail of blue ribbons.

----------------------------------------------------------

The house looked exactly how he left it. Wild didn’t know why he expected any differently. It took him five tries to find the right floorboard under the stairs. A dried flower laid on top of a sealed envelope. The now familiar handwriting had scribbled, “To Link,” across the front.

Wild sat back right there on the floor and tore the seal off.

“Dear Link, If you are reading this, then I am not here. Truth is, I will not be coming back to this home. Most likely for the rest of my days, however long that may be. I have been thinking a lot about you. Ever since the Princess’s letter, my thoughts have been drawn to you. More specifically, where you are in my time. Right now.”

Wild stared at the page, his dread starting to grow.

“That is why, tomorrow morning, I am leaving Hateno.”

“No...” Wild gasped aloud. His grip tightened on the paper.

“Fenton and the others are more than capable of protecting this place. I am sure that the Shrine of Resurrection is guarded well, but I would feel much better if I was there as well. In a few days, I will be finding my way up the Great Plateau. Perhaps I will see the ghost of the King. Perhaps not. Either way, when you wake up in a hundred years, I will be near.”

Wild let out a broken sob. Tears began to fall onto the paper, blurring both his vision and ink.

“You protected me all of my life. Now it is time for me to protect you.”

’No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,’ Wild shook his head, praying this was just a bad dream.

“Besides, you have to find an empty house when you wake up. Otherwise, you will not find this letter.”

“Rhea, please don’t...” Wild begged, despite the fact this had happened a hundred years in the past. Nothing he said could change it.

“You may never remember me. You may never remember our family. But always remember that I love you, big brother. That is something that I will never forget. All my love for all my life, Your little sister, Rhea.”

Wild flipped the page over, desperate for more. He searched the floor boards for another note that might have been left. Nothing.

He bent his head and wept.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Personally, I think Rhea survived on the plateau for at least five years. She probably got killed by the Lynel. And if you thought this would be a happy ending-- HA! Hylia was nice enough to let Link remember his family. She’s not kind enough to let him keep it.

And if you thought that was sad, just imagine Rhea wrapped in her brother’s cloak, clutching her broken weapon, and facing her death. Her last thoughts are to the comatose brother that she was hoping to see one last time. But she knew he would see her. And that was all that mattered to her.

Up next: Uh... Sky is the plan but Four is starting to scratch at my brain so we’ll just have to see.

[degrassi-fanatic]

I have a prompt! A hotchreid fic that starts as an alternate ending to the Chester hardwicm episode. Or: if you are feeling particular au-ish, when jack is born Spencer volunteers to babysit him to make extra money because he spends all his money on his mom and can hardly make rent. As Hotch’s marriage falls apart and Spencer’s past is revealed, they become confidants through the struggle

Even more angsty if your ready: Spencer faces the harsh relality of drug addiction after hankel, which includes selling everything he owns, and his body, for drugs. When Hotch finds out what he’s doing he does everything in his power to get him clean.

All of these could either be heid/hotchreid or dad Hotch I guess

Okay you gave me so many options (which i love!!) so i decided to write a one shot about reid’s addiction but, it’s not quite the prompt you sent in (which i hope is okay!!) because i wanted to get this finished fast and bring it to you and i had already wasted a day writing the first suggestion only to realize i had no plan.

Warnings for themes of addiction and substance abuse.

The moment Hotch had noticed Reid’s resignation letter amongst the scattered paperwork on his desk, he had known that something was irrevocably wrong. 

He had known something was wrong when Reid began to sneak off during work hours only to come back almost rejuvenated, when he would show up late to case briefings, when he began to snap at everyone and anyone only to grow quiet for the next coming days.

Hotch knows. He’d be a terrible profiler if he didn’t. God, he knows and he’s let it go on for far too long. He should have confronted Reid the day he noticed what was going on. 

Reid is a substance abuser. He’s addicted to drugs. An addict. 

It’s such an aggressive word; it sounds so harsh and hostile. Especially so, when Hotch takes into consideration that he’s talking about Spencer Reid, the least aggressive person he knows. 

Sighing, Hotch shakes himself out of his thoughts as he walks up to the front door of Reid’s apartment. He brings his hand up to rap against the wood when he realizes the door is left slightly ajar. 

Without hesitation, Hotch slowly pulls out his gun from his holster before nudging the door open all the way. 

Once he’s inside of the apartment, Hotch wades through every nook and cranny of the space to try and find any immediate danger in the form of a person. As he walks through, he notices most of Reid’s books are gone. All of the numerous shelves Morgan and him had hung up are uncharacteristically empty. Only a few paperback novels lay about.  He also notices the empty space where he knows a chessboard used to occupy. 

Ignoring his observations for now, Hotch pushes several doors open to find each room empty on the other side. As he’s a second away from holstering his gun, he hears the sound of water running in the direction of a door he has yet to open. 

Keeping his gun close to his body, Hotch places his hand on the doorknob. He gives himself a moment before he shoves open the door to the bathroom. 

He’s greeted by the sight of Reid lying in the bathtub, still dressed in the clothes Hotch had seen him in earlier that day. His eyes are closed. His face looks years younger. 

Water is flowing over the edge of the ceramic tub, and pooling into puddles onto the tiles of the bathroom. On the granite counter of the sink, he spots an empty vial and a needle. 

Right away, Hotch holsters his gun as he rushes over to kneel beside the tub. His hands come up to shake Reid awake. 

The first time he doesn’t wake, Hotch pays it no mind and repeats the action, with much more vigour. 

The second time he doesn’t wake, his vigour is replaced with desperation. His eyes well up with tears. 

He doesn’t bother to try and wake him a third time, His hands simply rest atop of his shoulders, clenching into fists before unclenching. Hotch knows Reid will not stir. He knows that he’s too late. He knows that he let everything go too far.

He knows that he’s failed this man one final time. 

His mouth contorts into a sob that rips out of his lungs, as the tears begin flowing down his face freely. 

Hotch killed him. 

He killed him and now Reid couldn’t do any of those things he wanted to do. He couldn’t go visit his mother in Las Vegas. He couldn’t try and bring Elle back. He couldn’t go to that Criminology Conference he had been raving about before Hankel took away the bright and beautiful man Hotch had become accustomed to seeing.

He couldn’t do any of that anymore because Hotch had killed him. 

He may not have been the one to plunge the needle into his veins but, he didn’t bother helping him pull the needle out and away. 

He lost him. 

Just like how he lost Elle. Except this feels a million times worse because at least Elle was alive and well. 

His arms come down to lift up Reid’s limp form as he cradles him close to his body. Uncaring about the way his shirt is getting wet or how the water is now flooding into the hallway or how he was supposed to call JJ after checking up on Reid. 

None of that matters because the person that did matter was dead. 

Trailing his hand from Reid’s back up to his neck, Hotch pushes his face into the top of his damp hair. 

“Spencer.” he croaks out, “I’m so sorry.”

Then, he feels a frail hand clutch at his shoulder. 

“Aaron.” he hears Reid rasp out. 

Only pulling back the distance necessary, Hotch finds an exhausted grin playing across Reid’s features as he stares up at him, his eyes hazy for reasons that make Hotch’s stomach church with guilt. 

But, Hotch would rather have him like this, high and wholly alive, in place of a corpse.

Wordlessly, he gathers up Reid’s lithe and shivering body in his arms. As he stands up with the man in his hold, he uses his foot to flick off the faucet of the bathtub. He feels Reid’s own arms wrap around his neck sluggishly, and Hotch has to bite back a wince at the feeling of freezing skin pressing against his. 

“Aaron,” Reid mumbles again as Hotch steps out of the bathroom, “I think my dealer laced my stuff.”

“Hey, it’s okay.” he murmurs as he heads over to the bedroom. 

Once the two of them are inside Reid’s bedroom, he makes way towards the bed in the centre of the room. With the utmost care he can possibly manage, Hotch sets the man down onto the edge of the mattress. 

Before searching for a set of warm and clean clothes, he makes a small detour to the bathroom in order to find a dry towel. After he’s done that, Hotch wanders back into the bedroom and heads over to Reid’s dresser. He pulls open several drawers until finds everything he was looking for; t-shirt, sweatpants, socks.

As he turns around to walk back to Reid, he finds the man smiling up at him absentmindedly. 

Hotch settles himself on his knees in front of Reid. His fingers reach up for the soaking wet tie around Reid’s throat. He struggles with the sopping material but eventually he undoes it. It’s a similar feat for the sweater vest clinging to his thin torso but, nonetheless, he manages to pull it up and over Reid’s head. 

“This is not how I imagined you would be taking off my clothes.” Reid jokes.

“Hmm.” he hums non committedly, as he focuses on unfastening each button on Reid’s dress shirt. 

“Can I tell you a secret?” Reid asks.

“Sure.”

“I’m in love with you.”

If Hotch already didn’t know that Reid was high on drugs, this unbidden confession was surely confirmation enough. 

Much to the presumed chagrin of Reid, Hotch was quite aware of the younger man’s feelings for him. He had been since the day he met him. Even a highly skilled profiler like Reid couldn’t control his microexpressions. 

It certainly didn’t help matters when Gideon told him to ‘let the kid down easy’ once Reid had joined the B.A.U officially or when Elle advised him to ‘be gentle with him’ before she left. 

“Thank you for telling me.” he says, sincerely.

Soon, the shirt is shrugged off Reid’s shoulders and Hotch wastes no time in drying off his torso. Once he’s sure he’s done a decent job, Hotch gets the t-shirt he picked out.

“Arms up.” Hotch requests softly.

Obliging him, Reid raises his arms up to allow Hotch to guide his limbs into the respective holes of the shirt before tugging it down over Reid’s head.

As Reid fiddles around with the hem of his shirt, Hotch switches his attention over to the top of his pants. He unbuttons them quickly and zips down the fly before drawing the garment down his hips to his ankles. With gentle hands, Hotch maneuvers each foot out of the pant leg before tossing it aside. 

“Are you mad at me?” Reid asks meekly, “For being high?”

Hotch could never be mad at Reid, not for something like this.  

No, he’s mad at Charles Hankel for abusing his son. He’s mad at Tobias Hankel for not being strong enough. He’s mad at the world that thinks the only thing Spencer Reid was good for was pain. 

He’s mad at himself. For not being there for Reid, for not being enough for Reid. 

“No.” he reassures Reid as Hotch heaves off the long socks from his calves, “I’m not mad at you. Not for this. Never for this.”

Balling up the socks, he drops them down to the ground. He plucks up the towel once more and dries off each of Reid’s legs down to his feet before helping into his socks first, then his pants.

Once he’s done assisting him, Hotch gets up off the ground and steps closer to Reid. With the towel still in his hand, he attempts to dry off Reid’s wet locks only to find that it’s fruitless with how damp the towel had gotten from the rest of his body. Without another thought, he pitches it aside. 

“You should get some rest.” Hotch murmurs as he strolls over to the lightswitch beside the door, “I’ll clean up the bathroom.”

Before Hotch can take another step, Reid lets out a whimper and reaches his arms out in his direction. His brows drawing together in worry.

“Can you lay with me?” he asks, “Please?”

Never being one to deny Reid, Hotch lets a little exhale before flicking off the lightswitch and making his way to the bed. As he toes off his shoes, Reid gets himself comfortable underneath the covers. 

From the second he gets beneath the covers, Reid huddles closer to his body and Hotch can feel the chill emanating from his skin. Bearing the brunt of the cold sensation, Hotch forces himself to wind his arms around Reid’s midsection, nestling him against his chest.

The two of them go quiet and Reid is well on his way to falling asleep but for some inexplicable reasons Hotch has a burning question on his mind. 

“What happened to all of your books?” Hotch asks quietly, “Your chessboard too?”

“I sold it.” he whispers, “And some of my other stuff.”

“To buy more drugs?” he asks.

At that moment, he’s not sure if he wants Reid to answer him at all. He’s not sure if he could handle the confirmation of what he had inferred. 

“I know you want to believe that I’m better than most addicts,” Reid starts off as he tilts his face up to look at Hotch, “But at the end of the day, I’m still a junkie with track marks on his arms.”

Immediately, “You’re not a junkie.”

A quiet chuckle makes its way out of Reid’s throat and the sound distracts Hotch because he cannot recall the last time Reid had ever laughed so freely. 

It must have been before Georgia. 

“Sometimes, my dealer gets me to sleep with people in exchange for drugs.”

The admission cracks against Hotch’s heart like a whip and the flinch is visible in his face. 

He thought he knew who Reid was. He thought he knew who his friend was but, the Spencer Reid he knew would never do that, would never subject himself to intimacy with strangers for an ounce of euphoria. 

God, how could Hotch let this go so far?

“Spencer…”

“I’m sorry.”

Reid sounds so small at that moment. It makes Hotch want to swaddle him up in all of these blankets to make sure no one could ever hurt him again.

In the end, though, Hotch knows the only real protection Reid needs is from him. 

“Are you disappointed in me?” Reid continues. 

“I think I’m disappointed in myself.” he says truthfully, “I think you should be disappointed in me.”

They fall in a silence. The only sounds that can be heard are the inhales-exhales wracking through Reid’s lungs and the whirring noises from the apartment above them. 

Hotch should have done something. He should have done anything. 

But, he didn’t. 

In his arms, Reid jostles around before wiggling up the bed to be eye to eye with Hotch. The glazed look and the dilated pupils brew bile in the back of his throat but, he forces himself to maintain eye contact nonetheless.

“Ask me why I left my front door open.” Reid requests.

Fulfilling his request, “Why did you leave the front door open?”

“I was hoping you would walk in.” he confesses as his cold fingers slot up between Hotch’s warm ones, “You saved me from Hankel. I thought maybe you could save me from myself.”

Tomorrow, Hotch promises himself. Tomorrow, Hotch will clean up the water in the hall. Tomorrow, they can have as many screaming matches as they need before Hotch convinces Reid he needs to get clean. Tomorrow, Hotch will help him detox, and he’ll be there for all of the bouts of vomiting, shivering, and sweating.

Tomorrow. 

Tonight, Hotch just wants to hold Reid close to him and remind himself that he’s still alive.

[profoundnet]

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The Masterpost is open for all creations by ProfoundBond members which are posted in their entirety during that month.

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Masterpost below the cut.

DragonSgotenks - DragonSgotenks

Getting to Know You (E, 9.1k)

When picking up his new company assigned laptop to work from home Castiel Novak meets IT tech Dean Winchester, who's a little flirty and a lot drop dead gorgeous. After Dean gives Castiel his phone number Castiel calls for help with his computer and Dean, well, Dean is VERY helpful.

Tags: TopCastiel/bottomDean, strangers to lovers, condoms, anal sex, meet-cute

~

one_more_offbeat_anthem - @one-more-offbeat-anthem -  one_more_offbeat_anthem

A Barely Functioning Adult’s Guide to Beekeeping (T, 10.7k)

Dean Winchester and Cas Devereaux, seniors, are roommates and best friends. Cas is the president of the beekeeping club, and he eventually cajoles Dean into coming to a couple meetings. Meanwhile, Dean is struggling with his relationship with his estranged father, whether or not he’ll get to graduate, and the fact that he’s maybe, kinda-sorta, almost definitely in love with Cas. Pair those things with his lack of confidence, a sudden road trip home to Kansas, a nosy creative writing professor, and the fact that he might be drinking too much—Dean’s a wreck who believes he has no future. But he might be wrong.

Tags: College AU, First Kiss, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, the Impala, Angst and Fluff

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Lovemuppet - @haybibiboi - lovemuppet

15x03 Where’s your head at? (T, 979 words)

Prompt: take a sad scene and try to make it sadder. 15x03: the breakup

Tags: angst, episode related

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kitmistry - @kitmistry - Kitmistry

Stumble and Fall (E, 42k)

Castiel was raised to do one thing: serve his country, whether that was fighting a war or becoming an expert spy. But when his lover is charged with treason and executed Castiel defects. He has evidence that can destroy the KGB’s entire spy ring in New Mexico, he has names of scientists involved with atomic weapons who send information to the Soviets, and he won’t stop until he has revenge. Putting all his trust in the Americans, Castiel finds himself under the protection of U.S. Marshal Dean Winchester, who is too cocky and attractive for his own good, but at least seems to know what he’s doing. When a routine transfer to a safehouse goes horribly wrong, Castiel and Dean narrowly escape with their lives. With the Marshals compromised and Castiel being framed for murder, he and Dean are on the run from KGB and law enforcement alike. They have no one to trust except each other, and nowhere to go that their enemies can’t reach.

Tags: Cold War AU, Soviet Spy Castiel, US Marshal Dean Winchester, Enemies to Lovers, Suspense

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latter-alice - @latter-alice - Latter-alice

pressing the issue (M, 2.2k)

"So," Dean shifts closer, "what's the big one?" It's obvious, and he isn't stupid. There's only one reason to ask this now. To press the issue. His answer is short, to the point. "You." The night before they leave to fight Chuck, Cas and Dean keep each other company.

Tags: First Kiss, Confessions, Cas is stressed

Sweet Insanity (G, 709 words)

"So," Dean draws the word out as he gives Cas a once over. "Did it hurt?" End of series fluff

Tags: fluff, first kiss

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Maleyah - @maleyah-givemetomorrow 

“Dean” (SFW)

A Cas drawn for Ineffable Impala's DTIYS. Sparked a companion piece Dean.

Tags: Destiel, Mobster!Cas, DTIYS submission

“Heya Cas” (NSFW)

Companion Dean, who may or may not be praying to Cas, while he's busy.

Tags: Destiel, DTIYS submission

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Kait - @kingbirdkathy - kait

Don’t leave me (SFW-ish)

"Don't leave me.“

Tags: things that Dean can never say out loud, hint of butt

reverse destiel (SFW)

reverse destiel DIY, original by gabester_sketch.

Tags: Hunter Cas, Angel Dean

smut time (NSFW)

just some smut

Tags: bottom dean, riding

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MandalaRose - @a-mandala-rose - MandalaRose

The Shots You Don’t Take (E, 57k)

Still nursing the tatters of a broken heart and trying desperately to stave off the terror of his impending graduation, college senior Cas Novak decides it’s time to blow off a little steam. Not just any hook-up will do, however. The last thing Cas needs right now is a distraction. On the lookout for someone he can enjoy a steamy night of passion with before leaving them behind entirely, Cas thinks he’s found exactly what he needs in cocky university hockey star and well-known playboy Dean Winchester. Dean is gorgeous, doesn’t date, and is the singular most infuriating person Cas has ever met. He’s the perfect one night stand...that is, until Dean decides he wants an instant replay of what was supposed to be a one-time event. Will Cas’ offer of friends, sans benefits, convince the arrogant love ’em and leave ’em hockey defenseman to find an easier score? Or will Dean wear down Cas’ defenses and lure the sexy nerd in the dorky trenchcoat back to his bed?

Tags: Hockey AU, College AU, Hate to Love, One Night Stands, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Injury/Hospital, Briefly described (non-graphic) violence, Panic Attack, Fake/Pretend Relationship, THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED.

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nickelkeep - @nickelkeep - nickelkeep

Sometimes You’re the Sea (M, 10.2k)

When a freak storm overtakes the Lebanon, and Dean is knocked overboard, he's considered lost at sea. That is, until Dean wakes up onshore, with the bluest eyes he had ever seen watching over him. In a matter of days, Dean's world is turned upside down. He's falling in love with the man who saved him. A stranger appears, demanding his hand in marriage. And Dean's pretty sure that bird just called him a Dumbass.

Tags: AU - 1700s, AU - Fantasy, AU - Creatureverse, Sailor!Dean, Cecaelia!Cas, Dean POV, Little Mermaid Elements

Dog Days are Over (M, 7.8k)

It was cold. Dean shivered and reached for a blanket before snapping awake. He wasn't in his bed. He wasn't at home. For fuck's sake, Dean was still shifted. He whimpered, hating how pathetic he sounded, and tried to push himself up onto all fours. As Dean tried to put weight on his front left leg, he yelped out in pain and fell back onto the cage’s cold metal floor. He was either at the shelter or at the Vet. And he was so screwed.

Tags: AU - Modern, AU - Creatures Exist, Animal Shifter!Dean, Animal Injury, Hurt!Dean, Hurt/Comfort

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FriendofCarlotta - @friendofcarlotta - FriendofCarlotta

A Fear of Falling (E, 40k)

After his partner’s tragic death, Dean Winchester resigns from San Francisco PD to work as a private investigator. Dean’s first case is a make-or-break opportunity: tailing the youngest brother of powerful shipping magnate Nick Novak. Castiel Novak, estranged from his family by choice, lives a quiet life 30 miles north of the city. His lonely but peaceful existence comes to a rapid end when he’s drawn into a plot to fake his brother’s death. As Dean and Castiel’s paths cross and they grow closer, the noose of a dangerous conspiracy tightens around them. Will they discover the truth before it’s too late?

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Private Investigator Dean Winchester, Accountant Castiel, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Discussions of Past Suicide, Discussions of Past Drug Abuse, Minor Character Death, Inspired by Vertigo (1958), Acrophobia, Angst with a Happy Ending

Stranger Things Do Happen (T, 852 words)

Dean invites Cas to experience the human ritual of watching horror movies to get ready for Halloween. Cas soon realizes that watching scary movies with Dean may come with unexpected... opportunities.

Tags: Domesticity in the Men of Letters Bunker, Movie Nights in the Dean Cave, Getting Together, Dean Winchester Has a Sexuality Crisis, Gratuitous References to 70s and 80s Horror Movies

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Ahurston - ahurston

Yarrow, Lilac, and Foxglove (E, 10.4k)

Dean, Cas, and the magical garden down the road.

Tags: Fluff but give it feelings, domesticity, post-season 15, explicit sexual content, established relationship

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allmystars - @allmystars-i - allmystars

Feels Like Nothing (G, 700 words)

Newly Human Castiel feels the weight of human existence for the first time. Dean is there to get him through.

Tags: Canon Universe, Human Castiel, Depressed Castiel, Supportive Dean Winchester, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Holding Hands, Hopeful Ending

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sketching-fox - @sketching-fox

The Black Trenchcoat (SFW)

Artworks done for the fic “The Black Trenchcoat”, written by spnsmile in our partnership on spncanonbigbang!

Tags: winged cas, kisses, fic art. Accompanied by fic by @spnsmile.

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Endellion - Endellion

If Tomorrow Never Comes (E, 1.4k)

Dean promised Cas wouldn't die a virgin and he's going to keep his promise.

Tags: Bottom Dean, Top Castiel, anal sex, anal fingering

What We Want and What We Need (E, 1.3k)

Cas is angry, Dean is sorry. They go to the bar's bathroom to work it out.

Tags: Angry sex, Top Dean, Bottom Castiel, anal sex, spit as lube

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writerposer - @writerposer - writerposer

Croat-Ville (E, 27k)

When Castiel stumbles into the Winchester's survivor camp, one of the few safe havens left after the Croatoan virus ravaged the earth, he had thought he lost everything. What he found there, who he found, would change his life, and maybe the world.

Tags: Endverse, Age Difference, Canon-Typical Violence, Time Skip

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Destielshipper4Cas - @destielshipper4cas - Destielshipper4Cas

Fake Bite, Real Love (M, 2.7k)

To show his ex that he has moved on, Cas wants to fake a claiming bite on his neck. Painting it on doesn’t work, but luckily, his best friend and long-term crush Dean steps up to the task. Keeping a lid on his feelings is getting difficult, however, when the alpha is nibbling on his mating gland.

Tags: Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Fluff, Best Friends, Idiots in Love, Omega Castiel, Alpha Dean

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Shadowkat83 - Shadowkat83

Drowning in Guilt (T, 4k)

Bot Prompt: Dean is having another slice of pizza; Cas is polishing his angel blade; Sam is at the library Summary: When Sam discovers a case of people drowning after leaving the local bar. They head to check it out, what they didn't expect was to lose Dean to the creature. Now Cas and Sam need to find Dean before its too late.

Tags: monster of the week, angst, flirting, jealously, hurt Dean, feeling realization, two parts, confession of feelings

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goldenraeofsun - @goldenraeofsun - goldenraeofsun

A Thousand Lies (E, 73k)

Dean Winchester is the best con artist in the continental US. Conscripted into the life after a stupid mistake as a teenager, he works for a man only known as the Lightbringer. He specializes in the marriage con, tricking his marks into falling in love with him and bolting after the honeymoon with everything they own. But the morning before his meticulously planned meet-cute with his newest assignment, he runs into an adorably clueless accountant named Cas in a coffee shop, and Dean’s entire view on life implodes.

Tags: con artist Dean Winchester, accountant Castiel, mutual pining, slow burn, Dean Winchester has self-worth issues, minor Dean/Crowley, angst with a happy ending

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andimeantittosting - @andimeantittosting - andimeantittosting

Honour Undressed (E, 15.3k)

Among his friends, Castiel, Lord Milton is everyone’s confidant and, along with his trusted valet, the fixer of problems. But there is one secret Castiel has never shared: he is in love with his valet and has been for years. Born in the gutters, Dean Winchester was assigned as Castiel’s batman in the war, and when Castiel travelled home to take up his title, Dean followed him as his valet. To assist Castiel, Dean is not above a little burglary or blackmail. But the one thing he wants for himself is Castiel’s heart. When Castiel’s closest friends become the target of a blackmailer, certain truths come out. But while Dean determines to seduce Castiel, Castiel is adamant that he must resist, for if there is one rule a gentleman must follow, it is never to dally with his servant.

Tags: Alternate Universe - Regency, Class Differences, Blackmail, Mutual Pining, Happy Ending

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starprincecas - @starprincecas - cuddlesandcas

Tell All The Truth, But Tell It Slant (T, 35k)

A cursed object gets touched, truths start coming out, and emotions reluctantly with them.

Tags: Canon Divergent - Post Season 8, Truth Spell, Bunker Fic, Human!Castiel, Drama, Humor

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ArielAquarial - ArielAquarial

Hidden in the Sand (G, 5.4k)

Dean tries to drive down to Palo Alto as often as he can to spend quality time with Sam. This time, things are different. Not only is he secretly apartment hunting only a city away, but he's finally getting the chance to fish on the beach instead of a rickety old pier. Despite Sam's warning about stingrays, Dean insists everything will be fine and heads into the water without a care. What could go wrong?

Tags: Fluff, Cockblock Sam Winchester, Brotherly Bonding, Day At The Beach, Vacation, First Meetings, Flirting, Alternate Universe, Lifeguard Castiel (Supernatural)

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spnsmile - @spnsmile - spnsmile

Destiel Prompt August Collection 2020 (G, 29k)

Collection of short Destiel stories prompt of August writer's month 2020

Tags: Romance,  AU, fluff,  established Castiel/Dean, First Meet,  Cute-Meet, Profound Bond,  Idiots in Love,  Boys Kissing,  Soul Mate

SKID (E, 24k)

Dean Winchester swore off love after getting dumped and fired from his job the same day. Badly drunk, he ended up balcony-hopping until a pair of hands snatched him inside a darkened room. But it's no hero, it's someone with deep voice whispering threats with a gun pointed at his back. Dean’s too drunk to deal with life but one good look at his hot assailant plus enough beer sold him to his accursed fate. The next morning, he found himself engaged to the most notorious leader of a powerful clan, Castiel Novak. Married life in the compound for a month was not as blissful so when he could, Dean fought for that freedom. Castiel relented and as Dean tried to put the pieces of his normal life together, getting a bike messenger job and dealing with pain in the ass clients, he now also needs to deal with the dangerous presence of his very jealous and very protective husband watching over him. Is his life ever going to get back to normal?

Tags: Alternate Universe-Gangster, MAFIA, Arranged Marriage,  Romance,  Hate/Love, Protectiveness,  Established Relationship,  Domestics,  Hurt and Comfort,  True love

Black Trenchcoat (E, 23k)

When Dean found out Castiel was working with Crowley to open Purgatory, he had no choice but to leave the angel in the ring of fire with nothing less than a broken heart. But instead of plotting against his friend, Dean takes a literal sense of fire vs fire. He decides to kill Castiel with love. Or that story where Dean convinces Castiel to look into their future to see if Castiel's plan against Raphael succeeds, only to find the world in chaos and an angel donning a black trenchcoat emerges to take Dean away.

Tags: Canon Divergence,  Romance,  Time Travel,  Protectiveness,  Possessive Castiel, season 6, Profound Bond, Kidnapped Dean Winchester,  Wings,  Kissing. Accompanied by art by @sketching-fox.