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#he was a bat after all
nelkcats · 1 year
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Past Errors
While traveling through Amity Park, Jason was arguing with Bruce and said the forbidden word in the city "Since you didn't save me, I wish I could travel back in time to save myself!", this was unfortunately overheard by Desiree, who fulfilled his wish and made him travel in time.
The only problem was that instead of waking up in his child body as expected, he woke up as a Lasiurus bat, and how was he going to save himself like that?!? The little Jay was staring at him and he had no idea how to help him, Jason felt helpless and powerless.
On the other hand, in the original timeline Jason's audio had gone silence. Bruce was worried, Jason usually hung up the calls not just disappeared. And no matter how angry he was, he would not stop communicating with his siblings because of him.
When Bruce went to investigate the last place his son was, all that was left was Jason's motorcycle crashed in the middle of the road and without trace of the boy, it seemed the vehicle had exploded, Jason helmet and clothes were completely burned in the place where he should be.
Fearing the worst Bruce began to investigate, but he would have noticed if Jason had been kidnapped (or his body was). Had he lost Jason over an stupid argument again? His fears multiplied as he remembered the way he had lost him the first time, and the start was not much different.
Unknowingly, Jason was stuck in the past, with his family thinking that he had died a second time in the future.
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*watching live hostage situation on tv*
Jason: You call the insurance agent yet Alfie?
Alfred: The 10 million is already on its way Master Jason
Tim: We’re giving the kidnappers 10 million to let B go?
Damian: If Grayson would just let me—
Dick: We’re all insured for things like this Damian and—
Jason: Oh yeah? How much are you worth Goldie?
Dick:
Dick: 15 million
Jason: wtf??
Dick: Bruce values us more than him so we’re each worth 15 million in the event that we’re kidnapped!
*awkward British cough*
Alfred: actually, Master Richard… you are worth 20 million while Masters Timothy and Damian are worth 30 and 35 million
Dick:
Jason:
Tim:
Damian:
Jason: And since I died I guess I’m worth squat-diddily-nothing—
Alfred: 50 million
Jason:
Dick:
Damian:
Tim:
Alfred: Master Bruce wanted a 250 million dollar policy but that seemed rather excessive and—
Dick: Are you telling me I’ve been kidnapped three times this year and Bruce has only paid 15 million each time
Alfred:
Alfred: I’m saying Master Bruce loves you all very much and once the kidnappers have let him go you can discuss that matter further with him
Dick:
Tim:
Damian: Todd, what are you doing?
Jason: Arranging a kidnapping
Dick:
Tim:
Damian:
Jason: I wanna see if B will pay the full 50 million for me
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steddielations · 1 year
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We all agree Steve has the biggest praise kink ever, he absolutely does, but in the meantime, Eddie’s just getting off free, walking around openly saying that flattery works on him
Let's talk about how Eddie ‘hides behind his hair and holds back a smile at the smallest compliment’ Munson, would be fighting for his life dating Steve 'holds hands during sex, randomly says you're beautiful, turns on his charm like a secret weapon, confident sweet talker no matter how lame he looks' Harrington.
Eddie's probably used to people being entertained by him, but not being endeared, and now he has Steve fucking Harrington winking at him after Hellfire, looking at him like he’s something special even when he's sweaty and has Mountain Dew sticky fingers, casually saying, "Why did they ever call me the King when you look that good up there on your throne, hm?” It’s a miracle Eddie isn’t constantly falling to his knees. Sometimes Steve’s compliments get Eddie so flustered that he just has to hide his face in Steve's neck and bite him.
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luxaofhesperides · 3 months
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Soulmate AU: First Words + End of the World ; requested by @justwannabecat!
Duke has long since accepted that he doesn’t have great luck. Most things in his life tend to go wrong very quickly, or complicate situations he was already struggling in (see: being a meta and getting his powers in the middle of a fight). Having an incomprehensible soulmark is an unpleasant discovery on the morning of his nineteenth birthday, but not entirely unexpected.
He had been hoping for something simple, a common one like hi it’s nice to meet you or sorry, didn’t mean to bump into you.
What Duke gets instead isn’t even words. 
Scrawled across his left hipbone is a string of symbols glowing a faint green. They’re not in a language he recognizes, and the symbols seem to move, shifting ever so slightly so they look different every time he blinks.
“Well,” he says after a solid five minutes of staring into the mirror, unable to rip his eyes off his soulmate’s words, “I hope theirs looks nicer than mine.”
He spends his birthday in a bit of a daze, enjoying time spent with the Waynes and his friends. It’s hard to be fully present when he’s all too aware of the soreness on his hipbone flaring up each time he moves. It’s hard to keep his mind off of it, wanting nothing more than to search for answers, unravel the mystery of his soulmate’s first words.
“Something on your mind?” Jason asks, as the attention shifts off of him for a brief moment as Harper and Cullen get ready to leave and everyone rushes to give their goodbyes,
Duke shrugs, carefully keeping his hands still so they don’t drift to where his soulmark is hidden beneath his clothes. “Yeah. Nothing you need to worry about, though.”
Jason looks him over critically, then nods. 
Duke resigns himself to being investigated by the rest of the Bats. If he’s off enough that Jason had to comment on it, then that means everyone’s noticed and are trying to figure out what’s happened. They’re not going to ask him, because they think he needs space to work through whatever’s got him so distracted, but they’re also not going to just do nothing. 
This won’t be the first time they’ve done this. Duke expects it. Frankly, it would be stranger and much more concerning if they didn’t try to dig up all his secrets the moment they caught wind of him hiding something.
He’ll tell them about getting his soulmark soon. Soulmarks can appear on any birthday between the ages of thirteen to twenty five; they might suspect he got his, but they won’t be able to confirm.
For now, Duke can keep his soulmate’s first words (whatever that gibberish means) to himself.
He makes the decision then and there, as his birthday party winds down, to tell them in a week.
And because his luck is abysmal, a world ending threat hits five days later and suddenly there is no time for soulmarks and first words.
Duke is the last to arrive at the Fortress of Solitude, hitching a ride from Superboy to get there. The biting cold and the harsh winds keep the place far from the reaches of the rest of humanity, surrounded by nothing but deadly white. 
Desolate as the landscape is, it’s still in better shape than the rest of the world.
Things would be better if it was alien invaders. It would be more bearable if some sort of cosmic colossus tried to eat their solar system. At least then there would be something physical that they could fight.
Instead, the world is breaking apart, the sky and earth both fracturing to reveal glowing green faultlines. Timelines are getting mixed up and muddled; just yesterday, Duke had to evacuate a building that had been demolished forty years ago, then stop a gang leader who wouldn’t be born for another eight years from taking over a neighborhood block and holding the residents hostage. Strange creatures are appearing out of nowhere, crawling out of shadows and tide pools and from beneath the roots of trees, all horrible, monstrous things that go after people with teeth and claws. 
The Flashes and the rest of the speedsters are nowhere to be found. The last time anyone get communication from them, it had been Impulse sending Red Robin a glitchy, barely audible video chat saying something along the lines of “trying to fix—unstable—keep us here—never been alive before.” All things that are very concerning to hear, made worse by the fact that no one had been able to contact them at all. 
The quiet loneliness of the Fortress of Solitude is a welcome change from the constant screaming, death, and destruction that’s taken over Gotham as well as the rest of the world. Last he heard, even Justice League China was at the end of their rope. 
“In here,” Superboy instructs, guiding Duke through the halls. There’s no time to look around at Superman’s secret base. All his focus is stuck on staying conscious for another few hours to see if this gathering of heroes is able to find a solution to the world breaking apart.
Batman stands besides Superman. Both nod at Duke when he enters the room. Wonder Woman is watching over John Constantine as he writes something on the floor, muttering under his breath. The rest of the Justice League lean against each other, visibly exhausted as they wait for Constantine to finish up what he’s doing. A few other heroes are here too, and Duke goes to join them where they lean against a wall, fighting to keep their eyes open.
“Hey,” he greets, voice low. “Hanging in there?”
Wonder Girl sighs. “Somehow. I don’t know how much longer we can do this. There’s just too much…”
“We’ll get through this. I mean, even without us out there, plenty of civilians have formed rescue and relief groups to help with keeping things under control,” Speedy says, gently knocking her arm against Wonder Girl’s. “We just gotta keep going. No giving up.”
“What’s this plan, anyways? I just heard that they needed me here to some attempt to fix things.”
“Well, without the speedsters, you’re kind of the only one who can help with time and power related stuff,” Speedy says.
“That’s definitely a stretch. My powers don’t really have anything to do with time. It’s all just light and shadow.”
Speedy shrugs. “Well, you’re here, aren’t you? Too late to complain about it now.”
Duke doesn’t get a chance to say anything else when a loud clap catches his attention. The entire room goes still and silent as Constantine stands up and surveys the circle and symbols he’s written, taking up an entire corner of the large room. 
“Alright,” he says. “Time to get started. Remember, let me do the talking. If you have to speak, it’s only to back me up or when a question is directed to you.”
Batman nods to the other Justice Leaguers, and suddenly everyone is falling into formation behind Constantine. Duke hurries to join them with Wonder Girl and Speedy, taking a place on the edge of the group where he’s a little closer to the circle than the others. 
Constantine begins chanting. His voice is steady though none of the sounds make any sense, refusing to form themselves into recognizable words, and the air the in the room feels heavier. The chalk circle glows a blinding white and Duke can see magic swirling through the air, his power kicking in the let him watch as reality tears and a glowing star in the shape of a boy comes out of it.
Duke blinks, forcing his power down. The hypnotic swirls of magic fade from sight, but the boy still glows, bright and terrible as he floats above the circle and surveys them all. A crown engulfed in blue flame hovers above his head and the fabric of the cosmos is draped over his shoulders as a cape. 
Just from presence alone, Duke can tell that this figure is now the strongest existence in this universe. He hopes this boy king is kind; no one, not even Superman, would be able to beat him in a fight.
The boy king opens his mouth and speaks, but it’s not words than comes out. A strange static like sound emerges, but light and almost melodic. 
His left hipbone burns.
Duke gasps, hand flying down to it, and the boy king’s gaze snaps to meet his.
The world stands still. No one moves. No one dares to breathe.
And then the boy king drops to the floor and walks out of the circle.
“I thought you said that would hold him!” Batman hisses at Constantine, who is looking more and more distressed.
“It was supposed to! I wrote it specifically to hold the King of the Infinite Realms!”
The boy king glances at Constantine. This time, when he speaks, it’s in smooth English. “Did you name the king in your circle?”
“Yeah, I named Pariah Dark… Bloody hell, you ain’t him, are ya?”
“No,” the boy king smiles, “I’m Phantom.”
The cape and crown fade away, and suddenly it’s not an all powerful, terrifying king standing before them, but a young man with white hair and green eyes who looks Duke’s age. Like he could be any other new generation hero in the room. 
“Phantom,” Duke repeats lightly, just under his breath, but it makes Phantom look at him again.
He walks forward, ignoring the other heroes’ aborted attempts to stop him, coupled with Constantine’s frantic back off motion happening behind him. Phantom leaves the circle and the Justice Leaguers behind to stand before Duke, a soft smile on his face.
“Hi,” he says softly, “I dreamed of you.”
“You—what?”
“I dreamed of you. I have for years now. To think that being summoned was what made us meet—” Phantom breaks off into a breathless laugh.
Duke swallows, then drops his had from where it had been pressed against his hip. “So we’re really—? You have my first words too?”
In the corner of his eye, he sees Batman stiffen up. Maybe he should have just told them the day after his birthday, but in Duke’s defense, this is the definition of extenuation circumstances. 
“First words?” Phantom repeats, “Is that… Do we have different soulmate connections?”
“I think so. Here, everyone gets the first words their soulmates say to them appearing somewhere on their body.”
Phantom’s gaze darts down to Duke’s hip, then back up. “Oh. I get dreams. Where I’m from, we dream of our soulmates, and the closer we get to meeting them, the more we remember the dreams.”
“And you dreamed of me.”
“I did.”
“As touching as this is,” Constantine interrupts, and Duke gets to watch as Phantom rolls his eyes, “We summoned you here for a reason. Our world is falling apart at the seams and we need someone powerful, from the Realms, to help us fix it.”
“Okay.”
“...What do you mean ‘okay’?”
“I’ll help,” Phantom says.
“Just like that? No deal to be made, no price to be paid?”
“Just like that. I’m not one for deals anyways. If I can help, then I will. But I do want to see what the problem is with my soulmate by my side, if you don’t mind.”
Batman steps in, fixing Duke with a steady gaze, a barely noticeable tilt of his head. “Signal?”
“Yeah I’ll go with him. Of course I will. The sooner the better, in fact, because everything’s gone to shit.” Duke turns to Phantom, taking hold of one of his hands. “It is really bad out there,” he warns, “If you need help—”
“I’ll ask for help from others in the Realms,” Phantom says. “No offense or anything, but if it’s really that bad, I doubt living mortals will be able to do much to fix things. It’s why I was summoned, right?”
“Right. Let’s get to it, then.”
There’s a flash of mischief in Phantom’s eyes, and cheeky grin stealing across his face for a moment, before he says, “Aye aye, captain!” and picks Duke up like he weighs nothing and flies up through the ceiling.
Duke is able to hear everyone’s surprised, panicked shouts before they’re outside the Fortress of Solitude and Phantom is flying them away. He only needs a few directions from Duke before he finds the first of the large fractures in the sky.
“Yikes,” is all he says, which is not a great thing to hear. “I think I know how to fix it, though. We’ll need to do a little investigating as to who, exactly, started messing around with reality, but once we find the source, it’ll be an easy fix.”
“That’s the best news I’ve heard all week.”
“Even better than meeting your soulmate?”
“I haven’t slept for more than four hours all week. Knowing there’s an end in sight beats everything else.”
Phantom laughs, throwing his head back and Duke can’t help but drink in the sight of him, so ethereal and bright and full of life. “Fair enough! Got any ideas as to where we should start?”
“I’ve got an entire crew of detective vigilantes,” Duke replies. He’s not taking any more chances. No more waiting to talk about important things; he messed up by keeping his soulmark to himself, so he needs to make sure everyone meets his soulmate before shit goes south again. 
“Let’s go find them, then!”
They take off again, soaring through the skies that are barely holding themselves together. 
The world is still ending, and every hero is being stretched thin, but held carefully in Phantom’s arms, racing head first into a solution, Duke can’t help but feel that everything’s going to be alright now. 
He’s had enough bad luck. Now, his soulmate with him, bearing the title of King with grace, things are finally starting to look up.
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ew-selfish-art · 3 months
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DP x DC AU: Danny desperately wants to find the explosion guy. Tim is really good at covering his tracks... he didn't account for ghosts.
The explosions make it onto TV as purported terror activity and most people haven't heard of that part of the world much less ever given a second thought to care about it. The only real reason it gets reported on has something to do with the Justice League and... Danny knows too much.
He's been in training for Clockwork's court (which he's suspicious of- feels like kingly duty bullshit- but Danny is playing along out of curiosity for now) and he's learned a lot about how the living and non-living worlds collide. That means learning about CW's usual suspects- one of which just happened to have a ton of bases around the area Danny was seeing on the news.
It didn't take long for Danny to try to piece together that whoever blew up Nanda Parbat was trying to fuck with the League of Shadows, and was doing it successfully. Less green portals in the world the better, same goes for assassins. But it gets Danny thinking... Maybe he can employ similar tactics on the GIW Bases that keep spawning on the edges of Amity Park. It would at least set them back while he and his friends navigated the help line desk to request Justice League intervention. None of them can leave Amity Park, so outreach is going to have to be creative.
So Danny figures he'll just find the guy. Call up some ghosts who were there, or er, came from there and get a profile and track him down. But the ghosts keep saying it was The Detective. Annoying!
Danny goes full conspiracy theory, gets Tucker and Sam involved, and begrudgingly asks Wes Weston his thoughts.
He hadn't expected Wes to garble out a thirty minute presentation (that had 100 more slides left to go before he cut it off) about how Batman totally trained with a cult and so did his kids. Danny kind of rolled his eyes but... hey, new avenue of searching in the Infinite Realms at least.
The ghosts confirm that Bombs is for sure not Batman's MO- But maybe his second kid would know? The second kid was already brought back to life though, so no way to easily reach him... Danny starts to realize that this might be the work of a Robin now. Wasn't the red one known for solving cold cases? (Sam provides this information- its a social faux pas to not know hero gossip at Gotham Galas- everything she's learned is against her will).
It all comes to a head when Danny goes about the hard task of opening a portal for the guy to come through at just the right time, explain the infinite realms so he doesn't panic and then describe what the fuck was going on with the GIW. It takes months, just over a full year, of random (educated guesses) portal generating- Finally, Red Robin drops into the land of the dead.
"So, you're the guy I've got to talk to about explosions right?" Danny enthusiastically asks.
Tim thinks he's died and landed in the after life following 56 hours of being awake and plummeting off the side of a building into a Lazarus pool. Nothing makes sense about the kid in front of him.
"Yeah, I got a guy for munitions." Tim answers cooly.
"How do you feel about secretly sanctioned government operations that violate protected rights?"
"Gotta get rid of 'em some how. Need me to point you in the right direction?" This might as well be happening.
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puppetmaster13u · 2 months
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Prompt 217
Babies can die if they don’t have enough physical contact. This is something that is known, but Talia does not have time to spend with her twins, and it’s not like she carried them thanks to the false Lazarus womb, so she didn’t even have that excuse to use. 
What she did have, was a near braindead teen who could be taught things through muscle memory. 
Which is how Jason ended up caring for a pair of toddlers between any training, even after his dip in the Pit. Well, he cared for them until he left for Gotham, to enact his plans, even if he continued to call them every week. 
But that wasn’t enough for little Damian and Danyal.
Where had their caretaker gone? Away from them? Where is Baba? Across the sea? Unacceptable. They will not stand for this! 
Which in turn, is how Jason discovers his the twins outside his safehouse window, having somehow made it to Gotham on their own- what the fuck, kids!?
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DPxDC Prompt
Inspired by "Don't threaten me with a good time" by Panic! at the Disco
Alfred, Bruce and Dick are out of town so the remaining bats decide to throw a party in Wayne manor, it's okay because they've locked up all the entrances to the batcave and anything that would lead to any vigilante stuff!
Which leads to the biggest party Gotham has ever seen!
Not only are their friends there, other vigilantes arrived, rogues arrived, heck even rogues from out of Gotham showed up! It wasn't a surprise when things got out of hand, there was no alcohol at first but it became pretty apparent someone spiked all the drinks before the night really set in. People found the indoor pool, they found the theater room, heck they even found the hot tub!
The night was the most chaos the bats had seen that wasn't hero work, the rogues, heroes and vigilantes that showed up kept their truce through out the entire night and once the alcohol set in they were even friendly, Tim swears he saw Impulse napping with Harley's hyenas in the kitchen pantry when he went to look for something to drink that wasn't alcoholic.
By the end of the nights things blurred and when they awoke in the morning it was very clear there would be no hiding any of this from Bruce, Alfred or Dick…
The party had somehow begun contained to the guest wing and sitting rooms to all across the manor, the pool, heck there were even people through out the gardens and lawn! Someone had let Batcow out of her barn and she was upstairs peeking her head out of one of the bathrooms!
Groggy, the bat kids gather in the kitchen to begin the slow process of cleaning up and clearing out the guests before Bruce, Dick and Alfred return in the evening. Damian spots a head of black hair trying to sneak out with the guests and drags them back in stating they will not get out of cleaning.
It takes some work but they finally get the most manor back into rights just as Alfred returns and begins dinner prep.
Cut to them all sitting down to dinner surprised they have gotten this far without getting confronted about what happened over the weekend. The plates are served and everyone gets to eating, no one willing to start talking lest they give away anything to incriminate them once the cat is out of the bag. And it almost works, if not for one things.
Bruce "So, what happened this weekend that lead to this turn of events?"
Batkids sweating "What events?"
Bruce pointing to Danny "Our new guest"
Danny "Hi"
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The anti ecto laws go into effect just before S2E2 “Doctors Disorders”. So when Danny’s entire class, including Sam and Tucker, becomes sick with ghost flu and start exhibiting ghost powers, the GIW swoop in and cart all the sick kids off to a GIW facility. They claim the kids are all ecto contaminated and therefore fall under the anti ecto laws! And the GIW aren’t concerned with trying to help the kids get better. Instead they’re experimenting on them. Danny knows he can’t get into the GIW facility to rescue them on his own without getting captured. So he does the only thing he can do, he goes to the Justice League for help.
The Justice League, and the Justice Dark are all together in the watchtower for a meeting when Danny shows up. He’s an absolute mess because his friends and classmates have all been taken by the GIW. And he latches onto the first person in the room that he sees. Which just so happens to be Batman. Now Batman has a sobbing hysterical ghost child clinging to him! Everyone is super confused. It takes them half an hour to calm Danny down enough that he can explain what the problem is.
When they find out about the anti ecto laws and what the GIW have done they are all horrified and pissed!! They immediately set out to rescue Danny’s classmates. And if they just so happen to accidentally destroy the GIW facility along the way well none of them are to broken up about it. After the kids are all rescued, cured from the ghost flu, and returned to their parents, the Justice League sets out to get the anti ecto laws repealed. They reveal to the whole world just what the GIW did to a whole class of innocent human children while using the anti ecto laws as cover to do it! The whole world is outraged! It only takes two days for the laws to be repealed, and for the GIW to be permanently disbanded.
A few days later Danny Phantom does a live tv interview where he answers questions about ghosts and the ghost zone. He hopes that this will help people better understand ghosts and their true nature.
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tezzzzza · 1 year
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#something something steve harrington bloodied and bruised #something something stroke his hair after licking him clean
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spacedace · 23 days
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Maybe I've just missed it, but I feel like there's not enough discussion on Catholic Jason Todd and his feelings on being seemingly resurrected by God Jeesie-Chreesie style.
Like, we as the readers know that it was a reality bending punch from Superboy Prime that brought Jason back, but in canon no one has any explanation at all for how that happened.
The Lazarus Pit fixed him, but he was already alive (just in super bad shape) to be fixed. He woke up in his own coffin and had to claw out of his own grave and no one in-universe can explain how or why it happened.
And that alone would fuck someone up, but add in Catholic Guilt (TM) and references to the resurrection floating around every Easter and Jason's gotta wonder at least a little bit if the Big G brought him back and if so has to absolutely agonize over what he's done with his big second chance.
I just wanna read 100k words of Jason's complicated feelings on his death, rebirth (resurrection?), Red Hood, God, Bruce and what it all means, if anyone's got any recs please share them I'm begging 😭
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klatchshy · 2 years
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nelkcats · 1 year
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Ghost Doctor
Danny became the new underground Gotham's doctor, unlike Dr.Leslie he treats anyone as long as they're willing to find him (and it is hard if is not the right time) and pay the price.
This may sound extremely sinister but the reality was that Danny was not interested in money; he was already King of a dimension and his funds were not going to run out while he was on vacations.
The treatments vary, along with the reviews, but this is due to the prices he give. When Danny treated the Joker, the clown ended up shaking and almost regretting his actions, falling into a laugh full of madness (Danny's price was simple: Face the same thing you put your victims through)
But when Dr. Freeze knocked on his door, tearfully begging to treat Nora, Danny cured her, his price being a smile and a plea "Live happily with your wife for as long as you can."
With all the knowledge that Frostbite teach him combined with Clockwork showing him all human advances on the future (is not illegal if your ghost parent show you) he rented a warehouse and with the help of some ghosts he dig a hole the same size as the warehouse but meters underground, after that he used his powers and sinked it directly into the hole; he developed all his machinery there, turning it into a Bunker that he was the only one who could access.
Therefore, Danny was a mystery, a danger, his prices were varied and he treated anyone: villain, hero, anti-hero, mafia, criminals, innocents, metas, etc. but your values ​​and actions were what whispered your charge and not even an extremely high amount of money would convince him of giving you a different treatment.
Of course, when Jason jokingly visited him asking to cure the pits (He knew it had no cure), his slightest hope was rewarded when the Doctor simply smiled and accepted (His price? A date).
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phoenixcatch7 · 11 months
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The Wayne doll house
Have some haunted doll au, since it's been bubbling away in my mind.
The bat cave is large and sprawling, many layers and tunnels and hollowed out cracks in the walls. It takes many years to fully reinforce to prevent stray kids from tripping into stagnant waters or fall down crags as he once did. The doll cave, as it becomes known, is in one of the deepest, darkest corners, one where the lights of the furnished caverns above don't reach.
It's one late night sitting at the computer when it suddenly occurs to Bruce that his first encounter with a doll was at the well entrance, many levels above.
There was nothing there when he went back.
-
The justice league stared at the subaru. The subaru, having no eyes, did not stare back.
The seven of them had just finished a very long, arduous mission, and narrowly escaped government censure after the base they'd been raiding had turned out to belong to some corrupt official. With the alert up, they couldn't escape through city airspace, or even in their hero suits.
So civilian it was.
Batman had hotwired some bloke's car while the rest of them ducked into alleys and shop bathrooms, but the problem remained. There was seven of them. And five seats.
"I can shift into something more suitable for being carried," suggested j'onn, "but I believe one of us might have to hide."
"Foot well?" Hal tried, and everyone looked around at the tall, bulky, broad heroes.
"Think they'd have to go in the boot," Barry finally said. Everyone immediately turned to him. "No."
Batman spoke up before the discussion could devolve.
"I think.... I would be best for that."
The team stared.
"Batsy?"
Having no lungs meant he could not drag in the tired sigh he wished, but whatever force allowed this body to talk was capable of approximating something suitably resigned.
"As I am, I am... incapable of fully passing as human. It would be best if I remained out of sight."
"So just? Go change? I swear we won't be weird about whoever you are under the mask. Even if you're like, bald."
"Thank you, Wally, but I'm afraid I'm being serious." Reaching for the mask in broad daylight was unpleasant, but the glue and wires held as he gave it a few thorough tugs. "It doesn't detach."
Everyone stared. Clark reached out as if he wanted to check, but withdrew.
"Do you even have a civilian identity??" Oliver eventually asked. "Because at this point I'm genuinely not sure."
Wayne Enterprises and Queen Industries had a meeting that same evening. "Hn."
"Can we go back to the 'incapable of passing as human' part?!"
"We can discuss it in the car," he snapped, stalking past Barry and popping the boot. "In case you haven't forgotten, we're on a time limit."
For once, that seemed to encourage them, and batman, with great dignity, folded his joints and cape into the small space, ignoring Hal's mutter of 'what kind of contortionist -' as he slammed the lid. With a little shuffling he managed to activate his comms.
"I will inform the watchtower of our delay."
"Batman, they're tapping all outgoing signals, you can't -"
"It won't trigger," he interrupted, before he twisted his consciousness and sent it spiralling across the country.
Bruce awoke with a groan, stretching his limbs and taking a moment to marinate in his annoyance before he reached for the comm and voice modulator on the beside table.
"Batman to watchtower, we've encountered delays. If the Texan state government calls we haven't entered the state in six weeks. Batman out."
-
"Alien?"
"No."
"Reanimated corpse?"
"No."
"Uh... Demon?"
"Hm. No."
"You're not just a meta human, are you?"
"No."
"Vampire?"
"No."
"Robot??"
"No."
"Batsy, please, someone's got to win the bet eventually. How do we even know you're not lying?!"
"You don't," Batman said, not looking up from his paperwork and Flash groaned, letting his sticky notes fall to the floor as he buried his head in his arms.
"One day," he bemoaned to the keyboard, "one day we'll figure it out."
"Until then please keep your eyes on the monitors."
Flash groaned again.
-
Robin ducked under superman's arm as he scuttled down the corridor, laden with the night's haul of snacks. The real problem wasn't getting them - stopping league members from raiding the kitchen would be extremely counterproductive - but keeping them until he could return home to his human body to eat them. Batman had started searching him each time they left and it was really cutting into his daily sugar intake. Unfair! Just because he didn't actually use energy to stay up my night to fight crime, it felt like he did!!
'Oh, you're broken, Robin, oh, don't go out until the glue has fully set, Robin' his arm was fine! It wasn't like there was much crime to be fought on the watchtower anyway! At least not physically.
So he was pretty pleased with himself until he went to set the snacks down and found that the tar like glue they used had soaked through the sleeve and gotten all over his chocolates.
With his other hand, he tried to pry them off, wincing as the wrappers tore and stuck. He tried to shake it, ignoring the way his elbow rattled in the joint.
"Come on, come on - aw, cheezits."
The arm fell off. Robin stared despondently at the limb, surrounded by torn wrappers and dripping black glue where it connected to the elbow. The sour stink of formaldehyde filled the air.
He was going to be in such trouble with Bruce.
The click of the door jerked his head up.
Flash stood in the doorway, wide eyed. Robin stared back.
Flash screamed.
Oh yeah @dehydratedmockingbird have a thing
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shower-phantom-ideas · 6 months
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Another DPXDC post for the first time
Yall remember winged danny? Yea me too the good ol days lads
But imagine Danny in Gothem cause hes either on the run from his family or the GIW you decide boys on the run and probably alone.
He gets picked up by the Waynes at some point and eventually he goes to have the “im not normal talk” but they all know. He is a meta or something. They have been waiting for him to be ready to tell them, if ever. They would accept him no matter what.
Except the time comes and he just “I have wings” and like everyone is shocked™️ Danny gets the idea hes about to be rejected and starts to fold in on himself and someone better snap out of it before the kid cries. Alfred is the one to speak first probably.
Just everyone so shocked but I mean it’s more a shock that they missed this instead of that Danny has wings. After that they fully accept him and apologise. Someone says the “we thought you were about to tell us about your powers!” Danny just has his own little moment before shouting “YOU GUYS KNOW I HAVE GHOST POWERS!?!?!!!?”
Anyway they move on and Danny hardly brings the wings up again but he does get seen around with them every once in a while. But eventually they find out hes not taking care of them as he should. It’s probably Duke who sees Danny with his messy wings and offers to help him.
Let Danny get help with self care ok. The Bats would all go nuts learning how to take care of Danny if he ever asks.
Now imagine the reverse of this and they all know he has wings but not that hes the High Ghost King Phantom.
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iammyowncryptid · 1 year
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Most dpxdc fics say that in the alternate timeline where Danny becomes Dan, Dan is ridiculously overpowered killed the entire JL. The problem is that idea only works if you ignore Batman entirely. Batman has a contingency plan for everyone. You could say that Dan caught him off gaurd, but tbh that’s kinda boring.
The only universes where someone managed to kill Batman, he was either killed by another Batman or by one of his children. Other Batman’s managed to kill him bc it’s a Batman v Batman battle and they’re evenly matched. For the other universes? Batman wasn’t fighting back all the ways he could.
Because here’s the thing about Batman: he has contingency plans upon contingency plans for Superman, for his rogues, for the entire JL. Superman goes evil in about 50% of the universes he’s in, and even with his friends he isn’t willing to let sentiment get in the way of saving the world from a potential threat.
But for his family? Batman doesn’t make contingency plans for his family. Even when he arguably should, even in universes where it leads to his death, Batman never makes a single contingency plan for any of his children.
What I’m saying is this, the only universe where Dan could successfully kill Batman is a universe where Dan is Bruce’s son.
And that, my friends, is a far more interesting story to tell.
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bluerosefox · 1 year
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Todd and Phantom, Mostly Ghostly Shenanigans
That one Danny Phantom episode “Life Lessons” but its Phantom and Jason Todd tied together in the Ghost Zone.
Danny is confused why he’s tied to Jason and trying not to detransform while navigating the Ghost Zone and avoiding some of his enemies (They do stage another jailbreak after getting caught by Walker and steal Johnny 13 bike during the adventure) but Danny debates on making a detour to the Far Frozen to get Jason looked at, he doesn’t know whats making this random dude feel like he bathed in sewer water for a year but whatever it is should get looked at. Oh, and due to some reason his powers are on the fritz as well for a while (maybe due to a misfire from one his parents machines? Maybe the cuffs are shorting his powers out? or maybe Danny’s going through like a ghost growth spurt)
Jason on the other hand is trying not to freak out that he’s in the land of the dead basically and tied to some ghost guy. Last thing he remembers was trying to fight some green flaming Mohawk metal guy saying he is “a rare prize” and will be hunted for sport along side with his other rare quarry (The Most Dangerous Game much dude) before being knocked out and waking up in what is apparently the Ghost Zone. He’s also gotta pretend to be civilian Jason Todd as well. He doesn’t have any of his Red Hood stuff.
Basically they both try to keep their real identities a secret (doesn’t last long tbh) and get into some shenanigans in the Zone while on the run from Skulker and other of Danny’s rouges.     
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