#he will absolutely admit if he's wrong and apologise then rectify what he previously thought

[gemkun]

i think something that is misconstrued is that ratio is always seen as abrasive and harsh. yes , he is a people displeaser and he is unflinching in his candour but there should also be emphasis on how he informs in soft tones and with room for questions if need be , because he seeks to educate and spread knowledge to those less fortunate and to those who simply wish to expand on what they already know. just take a look at the messages he sends trailblazer. so , i don't think he should be viewed as a coarse figure but instead , he's someone who filters out the nonsense and puts forth the purified truth.

[lumau]

This week has been sth else, so I apologize for a lack of editing. Before this whole story goes up on ao3, I’ll give it all another polish. I wanted to get sth sweet out there, hopefully changing the rest of this week for the better... so this has all the fluff. :)

This comes after the events at the beach, here: https://lumau.tumblr.com/post/658330266893434881/a-small-sunday-treat-interlude-ao-shun-in-skimpy

❄🖤🤍❄

Li Ming followed the king down the corridor leading to his private rooms. Ao Shun had not seemed to want to dismiss him yet, so he simply went along.

After the walk on the beach the king had shown himself brooding, and not another word was lost about the somewhat odd end of their conversation. Li Ming was still turning the thoughts over in his mind, when they reached the entrance flanked by a pair of guards. Ao Shun turned to him, as if only now noticing that he was still behind him.

“Ah, Li Ming,” he said, “I will retire early, and should not keep you. However, as you are here now, I would ask you to do my hair for the night. I am not entirely satisfied with the way Xiao has been doing it lately.”

Li Ming gave a polite bow. 

“Of course, my lord. I will speak to Xiao tomorrow.”

Li Ming graciously set down the little tray and unfolded the white towel across the king’s shoulders. He had not been entirely surprised when Ao Shun offered him another task, one that would not involve the presence of other staff. He had done his lord’s hair numerous times before, mostly when they were traveling, but the familiar movements seemed to gain a different quality to him now.

He took a deep breath and steadied his hand, when he reached out to undo the long braid, parting the strands with his fingers, loosening them with care. He looked down on Ao Shun’s back. The way he was perched on the leather and chrome ottoman he seemed suddenly small, so much more tangible and real. Of course nothing about him had changed - he was still the immortal king, the feared and beloved dragon god of legends, eternal, majestic and untouchable. The only difference was in his own perception. Those new, less and less subtle thoughts, the sudden wish to run his hands over his shoulders in front of him and the suspicion that his touch would be welcomed even. Maybe, if he offered a massage? He simply would have to reach out… 

“Li Ming.”

Li Ming felt caught, blushing at the ideas he’d just been indulging. He quickly took the intricate ebony comb from the tray and gingerly began working it through the tips of the long, black hair.

“I have been meaning to speak to you in private.” 

The low, soft tone of Ao Shun’s voice touched a part in Li Ming’s stomach and made it clench in a flutter. He focussed on combing Ao Shun’s hair, carefully, higher up. Combing it, and smoothing its soft lengths with his fingers, and combing it... If he didn’t focus on the task, he didn’t know what else he should do.

“I have been imposing my attention on you lately, acting on the attraction I feel towards you, and I presume you have become aware of it too.”

Li Ming swallowed hard. If his heart was not stuck up in his throat, making it impossible for him to bring out a word, what could he even have said to that?

Ao Shun sat completely still, looking straight ahead out of the window. Only the rise and fall of his shoulders gave a sign of his flattened breath. Somehow this little sign of agitation in the dragon king made Li Ming even more nervous. Ao Shun heaved a deep breath.

“I admit I have not done well, and my actions were not right.”

Li Ming’s hands stopped moving. Whatever he had expected, the low growl and the hint of guilt in the king's voice was not it. He stood stockstill, staring unblinkingly at the hair he was holding between his fingers.

“A man in my position needs to be aware of his influence,” Ao Shun said, solemnly, “and I have let myself get carried away, making advances on you without addressing the matter openly. You are bound by your oath to me. Naturally you would follow along with anything I ask of you. I should not have allowed myself to mingle your obligation with my personal interest.”

Unwittingly Li Ming laid the comb down and took up a crystal flask. He spread some of the mildly scented oil on his hands and once more began working them along the tips of Ao Shun’s hair in thoughtful silence. 

“Don’t you have anything to say to that?” Ao Shun spoke up again after a moment.

“My lord… I appreciate your honesty. I don’t think you have done me wrong, and you have not done anything against my will.”

Ao Shun gave a little nod, encouragingly, but Li Ming was not sure what else he could say.

“And about what else I mentioned -” Ao Shun inquired tentatively, when nothing more came from him, “About the interest I expressed in exploring a more personal contact between us…”

Li Ming continued to run his fingers through the king’s hair for a long moment. He wondered if Ao Shun could feel the slight trembling of his fingers, just like he could sense the electrified tension in his posture. He should have been prepared for this moment, after all that had happened lately. It was not out of the ordinary that royal dragons might request closer company from their subordinates. Growing up at court it was something one simply learned among other things. Yet while Li Ming had entertained the idea once or twice, and maybe slightly more often of late, none of his envisioned scenarios had involved the careful and earnest manner in which the king addressed him, or the blank space in his head where his mind should have been.

“How could I decline this from you?” he finally managed, and knew immediately that that was not the right answer. Ao Shun sharply drew in his breath and twitched his head to look over his shoulder. He frowned up at Li Ming.

“I want it to be absolutely clear that this is beyond your orders,” he growled, “If I have given you another impression, I will need to rectify it.”

Li Ming flustered. His face was starting to burn again, and he was growing desperate with himself. He had not meant it that way. Why was it suddenly so difficult to think, making it impossible for him to express himself?

“I want to know what you want, Li Ming.” 

Li Ming swallowed. The only thing he could think of to say was the truth.

“My lord, I don’t know.”

“You don’t know what you want?” Ao Shun asked.

“I apologise,” Li Ming said quietly and averted his eyes, “I am afraid I feel confused right now, and that is my truthful answer.” 

Ao Shun considered him for a moment, then his expression brightened again.

“Are you willing to find it out together?” he finally asked with a smile.

Li Ming blinked a little surprised, then he nodded and smiled back. The words ‘find it out together’ echoed in his mind, leaving a warmer feeling and making him more at ease. 

Ao Shun turned his head back, and Li Ming remembered suddenly that he was still holding the lengths of his hair.

“When I ask you for something that you are uncomfortable with, can I trust you to say no to me?” Ao Shun asked, his voice soft again.

“Yes, my lord,” Li Ming replied with a smile.

“And will you also ask for what you desire from me?”

There was a longer silence after that. 

“… I can try.”

Li Ming felt much less confident at that, but for now Ao Shun seemed content with his answer.

Li Ming found that he was still smiling, as he added a few more drops of oil to his hands, almost a little light-headed. The previously anxious flutter in his stomach had turned into something warmer, friendlier now.

He rested his palms on top of Ao Shun’s head, and began moving the tips of his fingers in small circles along his hairline. A head massage was not necessarily a part of his evening routine, but from the deep sigh and the slight sagging of Ao Shun’s shoulders he could tell it was appreciated.

He slowly ran his fingers along to the back, and feeling suddenly elated after their conversation, let them trail down behind the king’s ears, drawing gentle patterns on the soft skin of his neck. This was definitely not part of the regular routine. Ao Shun gave another sigh and let himself sink back against Li Ming, dropping his head slightly back to let it rest against him. Li Ming could see the serene expression on his face, his eyes closed and his lips drawn into a contented smile. He almost regretted that he had not simply said “Yes.” to his earlier question, and wondered for a second, if he would dare to ask to kiss him now.

Then Ao Shun’s smile turned into a grin, and he sat up again, the warmth and weight of his body lingering for a few more seconds where he had leaned. 

“Please, Li Ming,” he said, “don’t raise the issue with Xiao. I’d rather you do my hair every night from now on, if I get that sort of treatment.” 

The mention of Ao Shun’s attendant brought Li Ming back into reality, and made him a little awkward at having slipped from his familiar role. He gathered Ao Shun’s hair in a loose bun on his vertex and fixed it with a hairband. He felt a small sting of regret when he was done and Ao Shun stood up. The king gave him a long look from under his lashes.

“Thank you,” he said simply, and Li Ming could tell that he only partly meant it for the hairdo. Once more he felt the sudden urge to reach out, or to say something to cross the space between them, but there was the ottoman in the middle and the lump in his throat and then Ao Shun blinked, and smiled, and Li Ming knew it meant Good Night.

Sitting in his own room an hour later, he was still too agitated to go to bed. He tried reading one of the new books on his shelf, but couldn’t bring himself to focus. Too much had happened today, and he kept replaying the events in his mind, alternating between furtive excitement and coy bliss and a bit of disappointment at what felt like a missed opportunity in the end.

When he had once more been staring at a page for an unknown amount of time, a polite knock on his door made him perk up. It was Xiao, who apologized for the late disturbance, but she had been sent by Ao Shun to call him up once more. While Li Ming had already shed his tie and loosened his collar, he had luckily not bothered to get ready for bed yet.

He found Ao Shun on his balcony, cled in his black and white silk robe and looking out over the nightly panorama. Li Ming’s heart had already begun to beat faster as he entered the apartment, but now his nerves seemed to stun him once more. How could it be that he kept finding himself lost for words so often these past days, with his extensive diplomatic training and experience? 

“My lord, you required my attendance?” he said, settling on a safe, formal approach.

When Ao Shun spoke, Li Ming could hear the smile in his voice and knew it was not an official call after all.

“The sky is so full of stars tonight. I thought you might appreciate it as well.”

He turned away from the railing to look at Li Ming unblinkingly, long enough to make him feel self-conscious.

“And I thought you would look beautiful in the light of the moon. I was right.”

Li Ming felt ice and heat rush through his veins again. He distantly heard himself stammer, “Thank you, my lord, it really is a beautiful night.” He was certain that his face must have gone deep red, and hoped it wouldn’t be too visible in the bespoke moonlight.

A slightly crooked smile curled Ao Shun’s lips, as he approached him.

“Allow me to be frank, Li Ming.” 

His voice was low and soft, humming with a deep tremor underneath it. 

“I could not get you out of my head. And I wanted to kiss you.”

The words hung between them in the air for a few long seconds. Li Ming’s heart was racing. When Ao Shun held out his hand to him, he automatically took it. There was comfort in the warmth of his touch and the slight shiver he could feel in the grasp. It gave away the king’s inner tension, while his expression remained one of calm confidence.

“You have not declined or turned away yet. I take that as a positive sign?”

Ao Shun took another step closer, until they were almost touching. Li Ming could sense the familiar energy he always radiated, felt the air between them prickle with electricity. He could see his dark eyes gleaming in the low light. He had never seen them so close up. He wanted to lose himself in their depth, but Ao Shun was watching him expectantly. He opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came out. Ao Shun pursed his lips into a smirk and tilted his head.

Li Ming swallowed and muttered, “Yes, please.”

It had to be his voice, as the words came from his mouth, but he did not recognise its tone. The soft smile was back on Ao Shun’s face, and when he leaned in and their lips met, Li Ming stopped thinking altogether.

As Li Ming opened the door to his private rooms, he still couldn’t stop smiling. He did not know how much time had passed, but the moon was high now and shone in through the windows.

A part of him had wondered if (and maybe even hoped that) Ao Shun would extend his invitation even further. But he had said that he wanted to kiss him, and that was what he had done. And then they kissed again, and again, and some more when Ao Shun had walked him to the door. And they had both smiled widely, and Ao Shun had thanked him before wishing him a good night.

Li Ming felt giddy and drowsy, as if walking through a dream all the way back. He was vaguely aware of a different part of his brain that would in some distant future start nagging him about all the potential trouble he was getting himself into. But for now, the only thing he could think of were the sensations of those kisses he could still feel on his lips.