#he's so absolutely correct

[bananapeeeeellssss]

I see your Bruce Wayne is dating Batman rumors and raise you this:

Everyone knows that Bruce Wayne is dating Batman. Everyone knows that Jason Todd is Red Hood. Everyone knows that Jason Todd is Bruce Wayne’s dead son. Everyone knows Red Hood hates Batman. This is all a very open secret. Everyone knows Tim Drake and Red Robin have a very public beef with one another. And that Red Hood used to have a very public (but much more violent) beef with the third Robin.

This leads to the general accepted truth being that Red Hood hates Batman because he is fucking his dad, and Tim Drake and Red Robin dislike each other because Tim’s brother beat up Red Robin, and, once again, Red Robin’s dad is fucking Tim’s. Everyone feels a little bad for Red Robin, being at the end of both Red Hood’s and Tim Drake’s distaste, because the former is a crime lord and the latter is *Timothy Jackson Drake*.

This, naturally, reaches the JL whom does not know Batman’s identity yet. Green Arrow makes a passing comment about having also fucked Wayne, which Batman overhears. Cue absolute bat confusion, which he does not show. And that was how the great Batman found out that he accidentally 100% enforced the rumors that he was dating himself by the way he replied to reporters strange questions that in hindsight were so incredibly obvious.

This whole time, Young Justice is having the time of their lives (while also becoming increasingly concerned) as they watch Tim switch between devices as he replies to himself on different accounts on Twitter to further his own feud with Red Robin.

And Jason is. Not sure how he feels. On one hand, Bruce is now very uncomfortable about many, many things. And people yell at Batman when he starts treating Jason like his son (especially when he yells “I’m not your son!” Because what kind of boyfriend would try to make their boyfriend’s kid their own when they clearly don’t want to be). That’s an upside. But on the other, this implies that he is *Bruce’s* son. And that brings up a lot of feelings he doesn’t want to deal with. And back on that first hand, people have mostly stopped making thirst traps of his dad (gross). And on the second once more, they have started shipping Red Robin and Tim.

And the others are just sitting back and enjoying the ride (they are absolutely a part of this, but I’m too lazy to type out and come up with ideas for the rest)

[hinamie]

shhhh

[catgrandpa]

I need a fic where Bruce realizes this kid who shoved his way into his sidekick roll will not be leaving anytime soon, and instead of emotionally distancing himself he becomes a combination Helicopter Mom and Shotgun Dad.

☆彡

Tim: Bruce, I’m headed out to meet my friends at the mall.

Bruce: Is that Kent boy going to be there?

Tim, rolling his eyes: Yes, Kon is going. And so is Bart, and Cassie, and maybe Bernard if he can make it.

Bruce: Hnn. Do you have everything? Coat, scarf, keys, wallet, tracker, pepper spray, dagger, kryptonite shard, emergency beacon, first aid kit, fire starter, extra pair of-

Tim: Yes, Dad! I already went through the list with Alfred. I’ll be fine.

☆彡

Kon: Hello Sir! I’m here to pick up Tim!

Bruce: Follow me.

…

Bruce: Sit down.

Kon: In your study? Is Tim on the way, or…?

Bruce: I just thought you might need reminding of the fact that I have a vault downstairs full of items specifically designed to take down a Kryptonian.

Kon: Whuh?

Bruce: You should probably ask your father about the time I was slightly annoyed with him for encroaching on one of my cases.

Kon: Why are you telling me this?

Bruce: Now just imagine what would happen if someone were to hurt my darling little boy.

*door opens*

Tim: Hey Bruce, Alfie said Kon was here, have you seen him? Oh! Hey, why are you two in here??

Bruce: Oh, hey sweetheart, we were just chatting. Have a good time at the carnival!

☆彡

Dick, pouting: I don’t understand, you’re not this protective over who Jason or I date.

Bruce: Don’t be ridiculous, Jason and I may have our problems, but he would never betray me by gallivanting off with someone I disapprove of.

Dick, who covered for Jay sneaking out to visit Roy Harper just last night: Mhm yeah, sure. And you’re not worried about me?

Bruce: Chum, I’ve known who you were going to marry since you were 12 years old.

Dick: WHAT?

Bruce: I have the whole ceremony already planned. I’ve got Gotham’s best wedding planner on standby. You have a very nice house waiting for you both, 20 minutes from here. A modest 7 bedrooms on 5 acres of land.

Dick: I’m not even dating anyone?!

Bruce: I can’t wait to meet my 3 grandbabies:)

[m4rs-ex3]

i am so obsessed with the fact that out of everyone, runaan is the one who is so fucking Done

i can literally hear him thinking "yeah i've gathered. the walls in this house are only so thick."

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Get Their Ass.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[fannyspammy]

Also is it just me or… did Elrond suddenly get really hot?

Like he was always attractive but… Something about him this season is just whew 😮‍💨

[melljam]

gitae sinisterly devouring food

evidently very evil !

[iridescentmirrorsgenshin]

living for alhaitham's inherent curiosity about kaveh being the catalyst for an odd textual mystery...??

he already read the Very Bad novel in the house of daena before kaveh got hold of it? but then seeing it in their study and knowing kaveh must have checked it out, he... opened it anyway despite already knowing the contents?? 1) because he knew kaveh wouldn't mind, and 2) because he was curious what kaveh thought about it?? considering that he knows kaveh makes annotations in books??

he saw kaveh circle the killer's name in permanent ink, effectively spoiling the novel, no matter how terrible, and joined in by circling a name to create a red herring, but also because he thought circling names was funny <3

he put the book in the same place in the study and didn't say anything to kaveh when kaveh went to return it, and kaveh went about believing alhaitham knew nothing about it, until the quest comes full circle and kaveh returns to alhaitham to tell him the news, only to find out that he and alhaitham were jointly the instigators for the conspiracy.

the quest is THEIR fault!! but.. the conspiracy wouldn't have happened if alhaitham hadn't made the second circle,, so… if he hadn't been curious about something that occupied kaveh's time..., that’s so !!??

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[OLD ART ALERT] A COLLECTION OF SCENES FROM THE GILLIONS CATSCRATCH ARC THAT BROUGHT ME GREAT JOY. i love fishy chips especially when its just gillion being delirious and violent and hostile

[lizzybeeee]

Solas addressing current day Thedas about his plans to bring down the Veil:

[pencildragons]

commander fox wearing big fluffy tooka slippers and the tattiest handmade dressing gown you have ever seen . that's all !

[estebunny]

esteban ocon's post race radio message

via F1 Multiviewer transcript

[kkoct-ik]

some vaguely on model doodles as i try to work out what is wrong with them (what they look like)

[reddeadsredhead]

One thing I feel like people don't understand is Charles shooting one of the poachers. I see so many people saying how he's only standing up against poaching and animal abuse in general. I see people say he was cruel and cold.

But they're ignoring a huge part of real-world history; the fact that bison hunting was many natives' livelihood, what kept them fed and warm in the winter. Charles even mentions at the very beginning how important bison were to not only their culture but their very survival, and the mass killing and poaching of bison was a deliberate, calculated attempt to wipe out indigenous populations. Bison hunting was strongly encouraged by the government.

And sadly, it worked.

This is why Charles's rage feels, at minimum, somewhat justified. He's staring genocide straight in the face and he feels nothing but pure disgust and seething anger. I can't blame him for reacting the way he did.

[greenteaandtattoos]

the sheer unfaithfulness of laudna's argument of, "i gave you a bruise, you gave me gashes" in trying to undermine orym's validity as if she wasn't the REASON he had attacked her, thinking she was an enemy because he couldn't SEE her after she cast darkness and she wouldn't SPEAK UP to assure him that it was her and she REFUSED to back down after he woke up and chose thievery and lashing out and risking his life AND his trust instead of COMMUNICATING, left me completely and utterly FLABBERGASTED at the AUDACITY

[robntunney]

Don't use rational thought as a defense with me, not after all you and I have seen. Vaughn, you and I live and breathe madness every day on the job...there is no...rational thought! I can't even pretend to have a conversation about anything else with you. What it comes down to is faith.