#he's so pretty and it's so interesting to see an fc my age??

[svejarph]

For the meme- Han Hyumin!!!

(credit @dreamrutine)

name: hak achojah (last name, first name) age: 22 ethnicity: korean & nigerian occupation: college student (teaching?) & convenience store attendant religion: agnostic location: seoul, south korea hometown: goyang, south korea

short bio that basically means nothing hjdfkdhsajkf (under the cut)

his name means “rise to the challenge” and that is exactly what he does! he’s been pushing himself to do great, and continues to try to be an optimist, but he’s for sure got some gifted kid and college student burn out. sometimes it comes to show, but never around those he’s teaching. he’s mostly prone to working and studying, which has led him into getting some pretty interesting friends along the way.

[lucy90712]

Can you please please please write a gavi imagine we’re the reader is like a publicist / media person for Barcelona and everyone loves her/ is friends with her and she has an Olivia pope moment and gavi fall in love

When I finished school everyone told me that I'd need to go to university to get into the job I wanted but I decided not to go and instead I applied for an internship with fc Barcelona. Somehow that month long internship turned into a a full time job and I couldn't love my life more. Since I joined I feel like more and more people have been relying on my skills and my role has just expanded but I don't mind one bit as I’m really enjoying the responsibility and it's nice to feel valued. As part of the many new parts of my job I am now in charge of filming days for the club which means I am getting to meet the players for the first time as usually I'm in my office or in meetings most of the day. 

Today is my first filming day and I'm actually really nervous but not about the work I’m nervous about meeting the players. I have never been that outgoing so talking to new people isn't my thing and knowing that these guys are top level footballers isn't helping my nerves either. It's not helping that I did once meet one of the players who's now left the club and they were really mean so now I'm worried about all of the others being the same. I have to put it all behind me though as I have to do my job and in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter what these guys think of me. 

Like always I arrived early to get everything set up like getting the cameras in place along with checking the schedule as we are supposed to be filming more than one video today to make it all worth while. All of that didn't take too long so I just sat outside answering some emails and getting some other work done until the first set of players arrived. When those players did arrive we got straight on with things as I know that these players just want to play so I want to make this part of the job as easy as possible for them. After the first few videos were done I was really started to get the hang of things and all of the players had been super nice so I was feeling an awful lot better then I was when I first arrived. 

Gavi's POV 

Filming days are always my least favourite as I would much rather be playing or training but it's all part of being in the squad so I've got a bit more used to it over time. Usually everything is really rushed and the people in charge are just incredibly bossy and seems to dislike everyone which is the part I dislike the most as I hate people who are like that. Today I'm filming with Pedri which always makes things slightly better as at least we can joke around together but I'm still not looking forward to it. 

We both arrived early as Pedri didn't want to be late even though I didn't really care. He made me go straight to where we were filming as well which begrudgingly I did but when we got out there I was very surprised to see that the usual faces I see on filming days weren't there. Instead there was this girl who looked really young even about my age talking to the filming crew and getting things set up. I've seen her around a few times before but never knew who she was although in the few glimpses of her I've got I have thought that she was incredibly pretty. Knowing that she was going to be in charge of filming changed my whole outlook it actually made me excited to be here and doing the part of the job that on any other day I'd hate doing. 

Pedri must have sensed that I liked this girl as all of a sudden he grabbed me by my wrist and dragged me towards her. He introduced himself to her which meant I had to do the same and I did manage to do it but with a few stutters which I cursed myself for. Pedri continued the conversation which meant I had to keep talking to her as well and I kept stumbling over my words like an idiot. She was polite and took an interest but I just know she was wondering why I was being so weird as I never act like this around anyone else. At some point she excused herself to get something from her office and once she was gone Pedri just laughed at me. 

"Stop laughing its not funny I just made myself look like an idiot" I said 

"Oh did little Pablito make himself look silly in front of his crush" Pedri teased 

"She's not my crush" I bit back 

"I don't believe that I saw the eyes you looked at her with and I don't think I've ever seen you mess up your words that badly in front of anyone before" he said 

"Whatever" I replied trying to end the conversation 

"There's no need to be embarrassed I'm sure if you talked to her she'd see that you aren't as weird as you've made yourself seem" he joked 

"It really isn't funny I think she's really pretty and I made myself look like an idiot in front of her she's not going to want to keep talking to me now" I said finally giving away my feelings 

"Its ok man I know you and if you just talk to her I'm sure you can use your charm plus she seems really nice I'm sure she won't hold your first meeting against you" Pedri said 

Our conversation ended there as y/n came back and told everyone that we were going to start filming so we all got into position where she told us too and the cameras started rolling. She kept directing us on what to do and asking the questions we were supposed to answer in the video but I wasn't focused on that I was just watching her as she looked so pretty with the sun shining down on her and the wind blowing her hair ever so slightly. To keep me focused Pedri had to keep hitting my arm but every time I found myself drifting back into a dream world where I actually had a chance with her. 

Your POV

The last video of the day was with Pedri and Gavi who others have told me are a nightmare to work with as they mess about but I think that is good for the video as people want to see the personality of the players so I was actually excited to meet them. Despite looking forward to actually meeting the golden boys of the team I was also slightly nervous because Pablo is my around my age and from the first time I saw him I thought he was really attractive. Up until now I've never had much to do with the actual players so it didn't matter that I liked Pablo but now that we are actually going to meet I have to be professional and just forget about my feelings even though it will be quite hard. 

While everyone was getting set up I felt a gentle tap on my arm so I turned around only to be met with Pedri and Gavi stood right in front of me. They both introduced themselves and I did the same before Pedri started a conversation between the three of us. The whole time I was trying not to stare at Pablo but it was so difficult especially as whenever he spoke he kept stuttering and messing up his words which made me worried that he didn't like me and just wanted to get out of the conversation. At some point I was feeling really awkward so I excused myself to go back to my office and grab something when in actual fact I just needed a minute to sort my thoughts out before we had to start filming. 

I wasn't gone long before I was heading back and along the way I could hear Pedri and Pablo talking and I wasn't trying to listen but it was hard not to listen when thats the only noise. I heard Pedri laughing before I heard Pablo say that he really likes someone and made a fool of himself in front of them. To start with I felt hurt as I thought he was into someone else but then I heard my name and because of the situation I thought it could't be a coincidence. As much as I wasn't supposed to hear that it made me feel a whole lot happier as it meant that my stupid crush wasn't unrequited. The only problem is that nothing could ever happen between us as that would almost definitely get me fired although it could be worth it if I can be with Pablo. 

~~~~~~~~~~

After filming that one day Pablo came up to me and we properly got to know each other and since then he often comes to my office to hang out after training and we have even spent a few evenings together at his place but we are still just friends. He will make the odd flirty comments and I always reciprocate but nothing has come of it which I guess is alright but it just leaves me confused as to whether he's just leading me on or not. No one knows about whatever is going on between us either as I don't want to risk my job and he doesn't want the public to find out which means I haven't even told my friends out of fear of them telling someone else. 

Today is a big day as it's an el classico and for once I get to go to the game and actually watch instead of working as my manager has given me the evening off to enjoy the occasion. Being an employee of the club means I have access to all the behind the scenes parts of the stadium so when Pablo text me to meet him after the game somewhere private I started to worry as I just couldn't imagine it going well. No good conversation ever happens in a situation like this especially as he text me before the game so the conversation could go even worse if the team lose. If I wasn't nervous enough for the game now I feel like I'm going to be sick with nerves for whats going to happen after. 

The match was great with Kessie scoring a late winner but I couldn't let myself get fully excited as I knew that once the final whistle blow I had to go and find where Pablo wanted to meet me and find out my fate. Once I was inside the little room that I'd barely noticed before all I could do was pace back and forth which was only a few steps as the room as so small. So many thoughts were flowing around my brain and not a single one of them was positive it was just different variations of Pablo telling me that he didn't want to be friends anymore or that he's found someone else that he's fallen for. After what felt like an eternity the handle one the door turned and Pablo entered and then locked the door behind him which only worried me more. He looked at me with a big smile on his face which sent my mind spiralling even more. 

“Is everything ok what did you wan to talk about?” I asked just wanting to know 

“Will you be my girlfriend?” He just blurted out 

“Oh my I wasn’t expecting that of course I will” I replied before I really thought through the situation 

“Oh thank god I was worried you’d say no and you don’t have to worry I talked to your boss and he said that it was ok as long as we can still be professional when we need to be” he explained 

“Can I kiss you now?” He asked 

All I could do was nod before he leaned in and we had our first kiss which quickly turned into our second and third before we both pulled away with big smiles on our face. Before leaving to get changed Pablo asked me on our first official date which will be like all our previous hang outs but this time with a label and as a couple. 

[its-the-val-pal]

LF RP and RP Contacts!

Hey you there! Stop! Are you looking for RP? Do you want to make a new connection? You okay with someone returning to the game after a hiatus?

Hi it me! I’m Val! Pretty much everyone I played with is MIA and my character’s old connections are no more, so I’m looking to make new ones. To justify this, I’ve edited/changed the character a bit and I undoubtedly have a LOT of work to do to get back proper such as making a new carrd, glamours, mods, etc. But I’m working on it and taking it bit by bit! I have other characters and alts, too, that I’m going to be updating/posting about as well.

Here’s a sample of what he looks like now and, if interested, keep reading for a general bio/overview of what I’m looking for! 

Thank you so much for your time!

General Info

Name: Zheval Seltik (Val) Age: 36 Race: Viera Gender: Male (He/Him) Occupation: Mercenary/Bodyguard/Sword for Hire Timezone: CST, but I can make most things work as long as it isn't beyond 2AM CST. RP Style: I can do semi/multi-para and everything in between. I usually change my posting style to match the tempo of the RP. Ideally I'd like to get involved with others that also enjoy writing so I can improve my style and skill. A sample of my writing can be found here, having just recently posted it to get a feel for the character.

OOC: Hello! I've been playing since launch and RPing for far longer--as far back as old school Ayenee RP chats, through WoW (Silver Hand/Moon Guard - WotLK), and many others. I'm returning from a bit of a hiatus and pretty much all of my contacts are gone, so I'm starting over! Character rebuild, catching up in game, and so on. As for what I'm looking for--Zheval's always been a combatant. He can't read/write very well and it's a typical amnesia story to justify starting over. I love exciting RP-conflict, mystery, combat, adventuring, slice of life, mature, dark, etc. I'm happy to also do hangout/slice of life RP and take things a little slower, but I see him getting into tournaments for the thrill of the fight and, hopefully, being hired by an FC or individual as a guard, mercenary, or hired hand of some sort. All that to say I do have a carrd, but it's incredibly out of date. That's going to be resolved soon and is my first priority. The general idea of the character won't change, but obviously some things will be different as he's operating in a bit of a fog. Either way, to get an idea of who he was and what was left behind, you can find it here.

I Am Looking For

In-Game RP -21+ RP partners/friends to RP with in game. I'm okay with Discord, but I'd rather do within the setting/game itself.    

Long-term RP -So the character can naturally grow and evolve. I'm not looking for relationship/ERP for the sake of having one. He has priorities and, if those ever come to completion, then maybe the possibility will open up. But I want things to progress naturally and organically and right now it's not on his radar.

Themes -I'm up for just about anything! Dark, mature, casual, criminal, heroic, adventurous, whatever. I can fit this character into just about anything as-is and welcome it!

Hooks

Bodyguard/Merc - He has previous work as a guard and is currently doing that to make enough coin to live. 

Tournament/Arena - Host a tournament? Know one? He's down. Underground, seedy dives feel right to him for some reason. 

 Ul'dahn Native - Speaking of-does your character often visit Ul'dah/Central Thanalan? Maybe the bridge just near the Grindstone? That's his home when he can't afford a room in the inn! For some reason, it comforts him. 

Amnesia Experience - Does your character have experience with amnesia? Dealing with it themselves? Think they can help him learn who he was? He'd be more than willing to hear their story and form a bond. 

Exploration - So much of the world is a fog to him, and the littlest thing stands to awaken a memory or feel familiar to him. If your character either wants to help him dig through the fog or just an adventurous sort to explore the world, count him in! 

F.C. - Does your character's initials match F.C.? The ring is all he has to go on as to who he was, and any such person is immediately interesting to him. 

Enemies - A member of his past? Want to torment him? I'm all for it! 

Frienemies - A member of his past that used to hate him? Want to start a love/hate relationship where they’re constantly trying to one-up and cause problems for each other? Let’s go!

 Ideas! - I'm up for anything else so long as it isn't much more than lore-bending. There's likely a lot I missed and I'm more than open to new ideas! 

Please feel free to DM me either on here or via discord at itsthevalpal if any of this piques your interest at all. I'm looking forward to it!

[saint-sebastian-coded]

please tell me about the books you’ve read recently i would love some recommendations 👀🤲

okay!!!! im bored so heres my thoughts on all the books ive read (or finished reading) since the start of summer

all of murder most unladylike 5/5 its a middle grade series (9 books) about two girls in the ninteen thirties who go to boarding school together and solve murder. its so funny and i really like the historical perspective in it too. i read it originally when it was coming out but i decided to look at it again (can't remember the exact reason why but anyway). soooo fun and pretty clever too

monk and robot duology by becky chambers about 4.5-4.75/5 very interesting world building im not sure i fully understood it so im going to reread but i think its speculative fiction about a post technological world but a robot decides to visit and becomes friends with a monk

all of the locked tomb series. twice. 5/5. i feel i do not have to explain this everyone read it Now

priory of the orange tree 5/5 this is my fourth read through i'm currently on my second read of a day of fallen night (the prequel) and !!!! the prose !!! the world building !!! the characters. i kinda hate that very few people like niclays i love niclays he's so funny to me and a complete cunt

all of nevermoor. twice 5/5. its 223 days to the fourth book coming out and in the hiatus ive managed to write like 19% i think of all fic for it on ao3. so yk. i like it a normal amount its like its very fun middle grade series (im going into my junior honours year of uni so my summer reading was v self indulgent lmao) about a girl who is rescued from death at the last minute and has to compete to get into a specific society so she won't get deported and the world building is sooo good and i love the characters sooo much

fun home by alison bechdel 5/5 the way the narrative is presented in this like all the negative space where things arent said but we're supposed to understand its very good

the gilded wolves 3.5/5 i feel like its on me for like. starting this in june 2023 and reading little bits over the year bc i was a bit confused so im gonna try reading this again sometime but it was pretty fun ngl

transgender marxism 4/5 i found the ideas in this interesting but im not sure i understood all of it so im gonna read around the subjects a bit so i get it more

black leopard red wolf by malon james 3.5/5. i kinda lost where the plot was going about halfway through so this is another book on my reread list but the prose is soooo good that it kept me going

honey girl by morgan rogers 4.25/5 this is about an astrophysicist who has a vegas wedding after she goes out right after getting her phd and is kinda lost in what she wants to do so she strikes up a sort of friendship sort of relationship with her wife from the opposite side of the usa and i found it to be a really nice read

wolfsong by tj klune 4/5 this book is kinda long for what it needs to be tbh and i dont really like the omegaverse enough (its not omegaverse but like. omegaverse's third cousin basically like werewolves and stuff) but i enjoyed the writing style

he who drowned the world by shelley parker-chan 5/5 its the sequel to she who became the sun and i love that zhu has such a good time in this book the second the narrative turns to her its almost a buddy comedy. amazing prose love the world building love the themes love the characters. banger. cant wait to see what shelley parker-chan does next

kemosha of the caribbean by alex wheatle 3.25/5 its about this girl who's a slave in port royal during the golden age of piracy and wins her freedom in a duel and joins a pirate ship as a cook so she can get the money to buy her brother's freedom. i liked it but i think im kinda past ya ig

the aeneid by vergil (cecil day lewis translation) 4/5 oh my goddddd oh my god. amazing. poem of all time

kyoshi duology by fc yee 4.5/5 on one hand i liked it more the first time i read it but like its still good its just ive read some really amazing books since but i love kyoshi and rangi so much and i really like the povs from jianzhu zoryu and yun also

the silmarillion by jrrt 3/5 i did not understand. i will read again im sorry tolkien fans

the mcga trilogy by rick riordan 4/5 this book series was my personality from the release of sword of summer to like two years ago??? on one hand i forgot how much i liked certain elements on the other hands certain elements did not. age well. or weren't good to start with. i feel like rr should like. get a better handle on his narrative arcs tbh

the histories by herodotus (tom holland. not spiderman translation) 4/5 this was very weird but very interesting

the two ministry of unladylike activity books currently out 5/5 this is the sequel series to murder mosr unladylike but about one of the main character's little sisters and her friends outwith the story (which is excellent) i like that it balances showing that the lives of the original characters are still ongoing without going full nostalgia bait

the kane chronicles by rick riordan 4.5/5 outside of the walt and anubis thing (too old to date a Thirteen Year Old jesus christ) very good honestly rr's best series in terms of worldbuilding, characterisation and narrative arcs

the annals by tacitus (yardley translation) 3.25/5 v good translation but holy shit completely boring im sorry im a tacitus hater i fear. interesting historical source tho

lives of the caesar by suetonius (edwards translation) 3.75/5 every single roman emperor is in hell

the aeneid (aeneid daily) 4.5/5 see above

daughter of the siren queen by tricia levenseller 3.5/5 this could be good but every single romantic scene was punctuated by me saying aloud that i hoped jakey died. i do not remember her boyfriend's name i just do not care. nothing special tbh

the woman of troy by pat barker 4.75/5 this is the sequel to her book the silence of the girls which is a retelling of the iliad from briseis' perspective. this book is still mostly from her perspective but (i believe) a retelling of the troades (i haven't read the troades in english except in summary and i only translated it for like two weeks as a seventeen year old so i forgor but i think it is) i usually hate classical retellings but i like barker's take on things and i just found out (like rn) that theres a third book coming out so im excited about that

the atlas six by olivie blake 2.5/5 this book was written to have out of context parts quoted on tiktok

dictator by robert harris 5/5 this is the finale to his cicero trilogy told through the perspective of tiro whom i love and admire (he probably invented the ampersand and other stuff we use as short hand. everyone say thank you tiro) very good

the eternal ones by namina forna 3.5/5 i really liked the first book in this series and i think i liked the second one too and i think the worldbuilding is compelling but im not interested in any of the characters especially her boyfriend sorry. i liked britta tho. also again i think im kinda past ya rn so

nevermoor graphic novel part two 5/5 i thought the art was beautiful but the story was kinda rushed and one fairly important scene was left out which i was really looking forward too and also messes up some of the relationships which was a shame (unless it got covered in dialogue but i dont speak french i was literally just there for the pictures)

task force z #11 & #12 4/5 nice

tiger tiger by petra erika nordlund 5/5 everyone go read this now its about a girl who steals her brother's identity and his ship to study sea sponges and meets god who is a tits out nonbinary lesbian along the way and also: sea sponge

the lightning thief by rick riordan 4.5/5 the fact that luke didn't say "western civilisation is a disease" in the tv show is a goddamn travesty. also i have many thoughts about the themes of nostos and kleos between luke and percy

a sky beyond the storm by sabaa tahir 4.5/5 i love the world building so much in this book and i had a really good time with the character development too. i want to reread the series at some point all at once bc i finished boom three in december and i think i forgot some parts lmao

cursed crowns by katherine webber and catherine doyle 2.5/5 this book is stupid. some of the dialogue is funny. like twice

the eagle of the ninth by rosemary sutcliff 3.5/5 if aiglemene in tlt isnt inspired by this in some way (eagles, ninth, leg injury) i will be genuinely surprised. good time

the dawn of yangchen by fc yee 4.25/5 not quite as fun as kyoshi but i found the politics very interesting

whale weekly 4/5 i lost the plot like back in 2022 but the prose is immaculate its so fucking tragic and it was so preventable i love the whole cosmic horror of the whale

amari and the night brothers by bb alston 4.75/5 this has the same vibes as nevermoor but like the main character is looking for her brother and accidentally finds out that shes a magician and also this is a bad thing. kinda cliché but very fun and i had a good time

[moved-aphmau-rewrites]

so lets start from the beginning

so lets talk pdh, right? cuz thats the very beginning. for the most part, im planning to leave s1 of pdh alone aside from upping the intensity of the bullying (to make it more realistic) and just generally feel more like a teen slice of life drama rather than a harem anime where the protag chooses the shittiest love interest imaginable.

im also adding some mental health stuff just to generally make this more realistic! so lets get into it, this is the structure of my pdh rewrite!

Let's start with our leading lady, shall we?

Aphmau Shalashaska is a 14 year old freshman girl who has been homeschooled starting from fourth to eighth grade. She starts the series off as naive, though not as innocent as many people believe. She is known as the school's sweetheart, though many people suspect that she hides her intentions with a saccrine smile. To the people who know her, though, they know that her words are true and her motivations are pure. She is a light in many people's darkness, though her own world is casted in shadow...

basically i changed little to nothing about aphmau's character, aside from changing the years she was homeschooled. i decided to make her more sheltered but not completely sheltered.

i think i'm going to tweak her backstory to make it make more sense. i want her to actually (kind of) know about her father. he sends sylvanna (barely any) child support for her, to which sylvanna just gives it to aphmau directly because it isnt enough to actually do anything with.

im also going to ramp up the bullying and make it actually effect her and how she interacts with people, especially her love interests and friends.

the ending arc for aphmau in s1 is that she grows more confident and learns to rely on her friends when she's having difficulties with things. she wont end up with any of her love interests, but the trio end up extremely close. her and aaron will also end up extremely close and he will be introduced to the friendgroup (i dont like how theyre all kind of seperate) but he'll kind of be the "friend by proxy" because it will take a little longer for them to warm up (not anyone's fault, aaron is just... harder to befriend because he's an awkward dude)

as for her realtionships, here's my general plan for them (i had to split it up so aaron, laurence, and garroth under the cut!!)

Aaron

"It's weird. I thought those two hated each other. But now they seem inseparable. I just don't get it."

"Aaron? Yeah he's pretty weird. He has this whole dark and broody thing going on but he's such a squishy soul! He's like a pitbull! ...People think I hate him? Why would I hate my best friend?"

Aphmau is going to have more of a brother/sister relationship with aaron, they will NOT be the endgame ship of this rewrite. i detailed this in my pinned post, but i will reiterate: i do NOT like aarmau for the creepy, predatory way it is written. therefore i will just simply not include it in my rewrite. dont like it, dont have to read it <3

their story arc will stay largely the same. they meet online as FC/Shu (although i probably will change their nicknames because those are LAME) and meet irl in werewolf class. despite aaron defending her in person, they heavily dislike each other and bicker constantly. aph doesnt know she becomes the alpha female and aaron doesnt know that she is the girl that he's been talking to this whole time.

as FC and Shu they become thick as thieves, absolute partners in crime. they ARE aware of their age gap and there is no romantic feelings. they see each other as siblings and treat each other as such. they banter and bicker and fight but they genuinely care for each other. "i hate you, FC!!!" "i love you too, shu" becomes a daily part of their conversations.

Garroth

"He's so stoic, but around her... He becomes so gentle that it almost feels like he's a different person. She's his world."

"I think everyone but Aphmau herself sees the way he looks at her."

garroth is the first person to fall in love with aphmau. he stays quiet about his feelings for fear of ruining their friendship although he does quietly dream of something more.

garroth was always the first person that aphmau called on. his quiet and more serious demeanor was sought out as a comforting shoulder to listen to. before they knew that they were childhood friends, they had always described themselves as "platonic soulmates" (the word platonic made garroth internally wither and die but he kept that smile)

after, though? they were practically joined at the hip. partly because of their mothers and partly because they just wanted to. there was a select amount of boys that sylvanna allowed in her house (the only others being dante and travis, after many trials of proving that they ONLY have platonic feeligns for her daughter and NOTHING more) and the only boy that doesnt get her heavy surveillance

and that's how aphmau falls. breaking down his serious walls and getting to see his silly and goofy side that he keeps hidden made her fall before she even realized that she was falling

Laurence

"There he goes again, another girl wrapped around his finger."

"Laurence? He's so sweet and gentle! Sure, he's a big flirt, but he means well. I know that he would be by my side if I ever needed him."

if garroth's love is a gentle misty rain, laurence's is a fucking typhoon. strong and loud and passionate. he doesnt fall as fast. he even teases garroth about falling for someone so easily, but he very quickly learns why garroth fell so hard.

when laurence discovers his feelings, he immediately made it incredibly obvious. however, if aphmau flirted back, he'd become a blushing mess.

there was always boundaries with his flirting when they were friends. he never touched her, not in a way that could be seen as romantic. his hands always stayed firmly to themselves. but once he falls? he cant keep his hands off of her (nonsexually, obviously). constant shoulder touches, brushes of the hand that he plays off "oh aphmau if you wanted to hold my hand, you could've just asked!"

cupping her chin and cheeks, leaning in close so he gets an excuse to admire her face. the list goes on and on.

aphmau notices this, but she just thinks that theyre getting closer as friends. what makes her fall for him, however, was his gentleness. he was always the first person to tell her that she was beautiful, how kind she was, how thoughtful she was. he was her #1 fan, her absolute cheerleader. she had never had someone tell her that and now to hear it constantly made her heart flutter.

unlike garroth, she realized that she was falling for him pretty quickly. and that was about the time she realized her feelings for garroth, too.

[thaumatology]

Behind the Muse meme.

tagged(sorta) by @esotericjerks

Name: Nate

Age: 27

How old were you when you first started RP-ing: I'm pretty sure I started at 15, maybe 16. (That was a mistake btw, I do not recommend it.)

Height: 6'3"

OC’s or Canons: OCs, though I have a couple OCs who started out as borderline expies of canon characters just because I liked their vibe but I am allergic to actually playing canons because I feel like I will get them wrong.

Prefer to play females or males: I think if you looked at all the characters I have ever created there would probably be a slant towards male, but in terms of my currently active characters it's a pretty even split (though Colin still gets more of my attention than any of the others.)

Favorite faceclaim to play: I don't really use faceclaims, at least not directly. I'll often pick an actor with a similar facial structure to use as a reference when drawing a character from different angles, but I'm usually not trying to recreate them 1 to 1.

Least favorite faceclaim to play: N/A, see above.

Worst RP experience ever: Hard to pick. I've been in a lot of different rp communities and most of them have ended up eventually melting down over some OOC drama and it sucks every time.

Fluff, angst, or smut: Any and all as long as its interesting! (and tbh I'm kind of a sucker for domestic fluff even when its not.)

Most overused FC: I don't engage with the concept enough to know.

First character you ever made: God I don't know. I was making characters years before I ever started rping and I can only remember a fraction of them.

Worst character you ever made: If we're talking in terms of personality and morals then its probably my version of Beelzebub. The man responsible for Colin's birth and childhood is pretty up there too, but he at least had an (arguably) noble goal when he set out, he just lost it in the ends justify the means thinking.

Favorite type of plot: I love long term slowburn shit (not just in terms of shipping) that builds up on stuff established in previous threads over time. In terms of themes I really enjoy taking two characters where at least one of them is initially distrustful and having their relationship build into friends or lovers.

At what time of day is your writing the best?: In terms of actually putting things together, mid day. in terms of coming up with little tweaks that elevate what I've previously written? Just after I go to bed unfortunately.

Are you anything like your muse?: Oh for sure. A lot of my characters get little bits and pieces of my personality through osmosis, and Colin got more than most. In particular one thing I drew heavily on when writing him was how growing up with autism made it really difficult to relate to a lot of the experiences my peers were having, and while he is probably not autistic, he experienced a similar thing due to his condition.

Worst thing about RP (in general or on Tumblr): Imposter syndrome. I will spend like two hours writing up a starter or a reply and think I really cooked with it and then my partner will respond with something that feels like it just completely blows my stuff out of the water. I have to constantly remind myself that if someone is choosing to rp with me it means they probably enjoy my writing.

To end on a good note — best thing about RP?: Meeting people with similar interests and getting to see all of your writing (and especially worldbuilding for those who have it, please share your worlds with me I want to learn about them!!!). So many people here are super talented and creative and it's a joy to get to write with you all.

Tagging: Anyone who sees this and wants to do it!

[idcpxseur]

so lets start from the beginning

so lets talk pdh, right? cuz thats the very beginning. for the most part, im planning to leave s1 of pdh alone aside from upping the intensity of the bullying (to make it more realistic) and just generally feel more like a teen slice of life drama rather than a harem anime where the protag chooses the shittiest love interest imaginable.

im also adding some mental health stuff just to generally make this more realistic! so lets get into it, this is the structure of my pdh rewrite!

Let's start with our leading lady, shall we?

Aphmau Shalashaska is a 14 year old freshman girl who has been homeschooled starting from fourth to eighth grade. She starts the series off as naive, though not as innocent as many people believe. She is known as the school's sweetheart, though many people suspect that she hides her intentions with a saccrine smile. To the people who know her, though, they know that her words are true and her motivations are pure. She is a light in many people's darkness, though her own world is casted in shadow...

basically i changed little to nothing about aphmau's character, aside from changing the years she was homeschooled. i decided to make her more sheltered but not completely sheltered.

i think i'm going to tweak her backstory to make it make more sense. i want her to actually (kind of) know about her father. he sends sylvanna (barely any) child support for her, to which sylvanna just gives it to aphmau directly because it isnt enough to actually do anything with.

im also going to ramp up the bullying and make it actually effect her and how she interacts with people, especially her love interests and friends.

the ending arc for aphmau in s1 is that she grows more confident and learns to rely on her friends when she's having difficulties with things. she wont end up with any of her love interests, but the trio end up extremely close. her and aaron will also end up extremely close and he will be introduced to the friendgroup (i dont like how theyre all kind of seperate) but he'll kind of be the "friend by proxy" because it will take a little longer for them to warm up (not anyone's fault, aaron is just... harder to befriend because he's an awkward dude)

as for her realtionships, here's my general plan for them (i had to split it up so aaron, laurence, and garroth under the cut!!)

Aaron

"It's weird. I thought those two hated each other. But now they seem inseparable. I just don't get it."

"Aaron? Yeah he's pretty weird. He has this whole dark and broody thing going on but he's such a squishy soul! He's like a pitbull! ...People think I hate him? Why would I hate my best friend?"

Aphmau is going to have more of a brother/sister relationship with aaron, they will NOT be the endgame ship of this rewrite. i detailed this in my pinned post, but i will reiterate: i do NOT like aarmau for the creepy, predatory way it is written. therefore i will just simply not include it in my rewrite. dont like it, dont have to read it <3

their story arc will stay largely the same. they meet online as FC/Shu (although i probably will change their nicknames because those are LAME) and meet irl in werewolf class. despite aaron defending her in person, they heavily dislike each other and bicker constantly. aph doesnt know she becomes the alpha female and aaron doesnt know that she is the girl that he's been talking to this whole time.

as FC and Shu they become thick as thieves, absolute partners in crime. they ARE aware of their age gap and there is no romantic feelings. they see each other as siblings and treat each other as such. they banter and bicker and fight but they genuinely care for each other. "i hate you, FC!!!" "i love you too, shu" becomes a daily part of their conversations.

Garroth

"He's so stoic, but around her... He becomes so gentle that it almost feels like he's a different person. She's his world."

"I think everyone but Aphmau herself sees the way he looks at her."

garroth is the first person to fall in love with aphmau. he stays quiet about his feelings for fear of ruining their friendship although he does quietly dream of something more.

garroth was always the first person that aphmau called on. his quiet and more serious demeanor was sought out as a comforting shoulder to listen to. before they knew that they were childhood friends, they had always described themselves as "platonic soulmates" (the word platonic made garroth internally wither and die but he kept that smile)

after, though? they were practically joined at the hip. partly because of their mothers and partly because they just wanted to. there was a select amount of boys that sylvanna allowed in her house (the only others being dante and travis, after many trials of proving that they ONLY have platonic feeligns for her daughter and NOTHING more) and the only boy that doesnt get her heavy surveillance

and that's how aphmau falls. breaking down his serious walls and getting to see his silly and goofy side that he keeps hidden made her fall before she even realized that she was falling

Laurence

"There he goes again, another girl wrapped around his finger."

"Laurence? He's so sweet and gentle! Sure, he's a big flirt, but he means well. I know that he would be by my side if I ever needed him."

if garroth's love is a gentle misty rain, laurence's is a fucking typhoon. strong and loud and passionate. he doesnt fall as fast. he even teases garroth about falling for someone so easily, but he very quickly learns why garroth fell so hard.

when laurence discovers his feelings, he immediately made it incredibly obvious. however, if aphmau flirted back, he'd become a blushing mess.

there was always boundaries with his flirting when they were friends. he never touched her, not in a way that could be seen as romantic. his hands always stayed firmly to themselves. but once he falls? he cant keep his hands off of her (nonsexually, obviously). constant shoulder touches, brushes of the hand that he plays off "oh aphmau if you wanted to hold my hand, you could've just asked!"

cupping her chin and cheeks, leaning in close so he gets an excuse to admire her face. the list goes on and on.

aphmau notices this, but she just thinks that theyre getting closer as friends. what makes her fall for him, however, was his gentleness. he was always the first person to tell her that she was beautiful, how kind she was, how thoughtful she was. he was her #1 fan, her absolute cheerleader. she had never had someone tell her that and now to hear it constantly made her heart flutter.

unlike garroth, she realized that she was falling for him pretty quickly. and that was about the time she realized her feelings for garroth, too.

[harrison-abbott]

quite a hefty loan

My son Hamish got heavily into Led Zeppelin.

And he fell in love with Jimmy Page’s playing,

And he asked for an electric guitar for Christmas.

And I bought him one, alongside an amp and

Sheet music and I paid a guitarist friend I knew to

Come over to the house to give him lessons.

Hamish got bored of the lessons fairly quickly.

My friend said to me, “I don’t think Hamish is

Practising with his work. He needs to practise

If he wants to get anywhere.” And Hamish, after

A while, said he didn’t want to do the lessons

Anymore, and then he gave up the guitar altogether.

I asked him why and he said, “Because I’ll never

Be as good as Jimmy Page.”

So I sold the electric guitar and amp on eBay. And

I lost a lot of money as a result.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Hamish became interested in a girl in his school.

Then he was going out with her, and she would

Come around to the house and they would go into

His bedroom for hours, with a shut door, and it

Was all a bit weird.

Hamish was a goodlooking kid and I suppose

The girl was pretty as well. And they were only

Fifteen, the both of the, so I thought it was fairly

Innocent. It was in November when they hooked up

And then in February Valentine’s Day was coming

Near, and Hamish knocked on my office door

And coyly asked me for some money so he could

Get her some gifts for the day. I ended up giving him

£40. Because he kinda sweet talked his way into

Describing the gifts he needed to get. And I regretted

It afterwards because he’d fucked me over. I shouldn’t

Have given him that much.

And what made it worse was that he broke up

With the blooming girlfriend one week after Valentine’s

Day. He didn’t tell me about it; told his mother

About it. And he was all blue and depressed in

His room, despite it being him who pulled the plug on her.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Hamish got into soccer for a brief spell, after watching

Liverpool FC win the Champion’s League. He said

He wanted to try out at the local team, wanted to get into

Football. He’d never been sporty and he wasn’t particularly

Athletic and he barely knew the rules of soccer.

He asked for a Liverpool top: and I said no.

But I got him a pair of football boots and drove him down

To the local park where some middle aged men

Ran a amateur squad. They said they’d give him a

Trial of four weeks to see if he showed any promise.

Hamish went to the first practise. He was totally

Exhausted: I picked him up at the park and there

Was dried sweat and mud all over his face.

He went to the second practise and he played

A game or two with the team. I asked him how

It had gone, on the drive back home, and he responded,

“I didn’t get much of the ball.”

And on the third time, I didn’t drive him home,

Because he walked home from the park by himself.

He went up to his bedroom and shut the door.

When I asked what was wrong he said he had chucked

His boots away and that he wasn’t going back to

Training ever again.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Those were all in his youth. These stories.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Hamish did pretty well at university and then he got

A job and then he met this woman and got engaged

To her. I liked his fiancé as well. She seemed good for him.

Hamish asked me for a loan of money [quite a hefty loan]

In the lead up to his wedding.

It had been a long, dragged out affair with the engagement.

And the wedding event was supposed to be this huge affair.

Extravagant, and Hamish said he was struggling to pay

For all of it, but if I could lend him some money then he

Would be able to pay me back after his honeymoon?

So I sent him the money.

And, ten days later, he and the fiancé had had a massive

Fight. And she had stormed off and gone to stay with her sister.

It turned out that she and Hamish had been bickering for

Months and that their relationship was in freefall.

So why the fuck did Hamish ask me for all of that money

If he knew that she and him were headed for Hell!

They split up. And the wedding was called off.

Two years after all of that, I called up Hamish and asked him

If he could send me that loan money back from the event.

He got offended and aggressive and told me that he didn’t

Have the funds for it at the moment. But he could send it

Back in the future. … He never did.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I’m an old man, now. And Hamish is approaching his middle ages.

He has a new, actual wife. Has had one for a while and he

Has a son too and so that makes me a grandfather.

Last Sunday it was Father’s Day. I’ve never really cared about

Card company holidays. Meh, I don’t mind them. But, Hamish

Got in contact with me on the weekend before that to say

He would drive down to see me on the Sunday. I was looking

Forward to seeing him and was touched that he had made this vow.

And on Sunday morning he texted me to say that he had the flu

And wasn’t able to come. He was so sad. Sorry Dad, he said.

[covingtonrp]

WYATT ABHRAMS is looking for his SIBLINGS (2 SISTERS AND 1 BROTHER). For more details and how to contact the player, read below.

THIS CONNECTION (3/3) ARE TAKEN.

Character Name: Wyatt Abhrams

Connection Name: Liam Abhrams (brother), Olivia Abhrams (sister), Scarlett Abhrams (sister)

Age Range: 36-30 with Scarlett being 32-30, and Liam and Olivia depending on who is older being 36-34 and 32-34 respectively.

Type of Connection: Siblings (Younger Brother, Younger Sister 1, Younger Sister 2)

Suggested Faceclaims: I'm really bad with faceclaim suggestions so I'm not really tied to any one FC and will be happy with whoever you feel fits the character best. A few suggestions below based on my very limited knowledge of FCs!

Olivia - Emily Vancamp, Brie Larson, Rebecca Rittenhouse, UTP TAKEN

Liam - Dan Stevens, Hunter Parrish, Glen Powell, UTP TAKEN

Scarlett - Lili Reinhart, Elizabeth Lail, Brianne Howey, UTP TAKEN

Details: 

The Abhrams are pretty much political royalty in Covington. From the time the town started, every generation in the Abhrams family has run and won their mayoral bid every single time. Benjamin Abhrams, the siblings' father, also went into politics. They were a pretty happy family so long as Benjamin was winning the elections he was running for. He was a bit self-absorbed (as politicians often are) and rather absent in terms of parenting. He wasn't a bad father the times he was there, but he was not that connected to his children. He was more of a floater in their lives in those initial days, spending time with them during his euphoric highs, but holing himself away from the family during most of the other times. He lost his second mayoral bid and that shook him to his core. He was the first in the entire line of Abhrams to have lost. After two years, in an interim election after the mayor at the time stepped down, he won again and he was positive that the previous loss had been a fluke. When he ran in the following election, he lost once more and that changed the course of the Abhrams family.

Benjamin got really touchy about everything because he felt like a failure. He started to take it out on his children, mostly Wyatt for the time that he was there because Wyatt's temper matched their fathers at the time. The others still received some level of his anger too, and after Wyatt left, he doesn't really know too much about how his father behaved. Anytime the conversation went towards him, Wyatt would redirect the conversation away. In May 2023, Benjamin went missing which has shaken the family, especially their mother. They have no idea where he has gone but rumors were that he was considering another go at the upcoming mayoral election before his disappearance.

In terms of the siblings, I like to let the player sort of shape the muse as they see fit. I imagine that after Wyatt left, things didn't improve completely but probably got a bit better. I imagine that Benjamin tried to push Liam towards politics and considering running for something in town down the line as well. Scarlett would have been the one who saw the least of their father's best days. Olivia I imagine was their mother's favorite because she took on a caretaker role while their mother tried to handle their father over the years.

I'd really love to have the siblings around so if you're interested, please reach out to me here!!

Contact the player at: @ahalyaxreddy

[darkdoverpseeker]

🕊️⛓️ hiii all! i am on my hands and knees for an obsessive, tension-filled, lots of pining and generally depraved (legal) age gap dynamic! mxf and ocxoc is what i’m currently looking for (although i could be swayed to canonxoc if someone’s fitting!). i’d like to play the younger female! the actual dynamic itself is still up in the air! i have a lot of ideas of potential ones — power dynamics, mafia boss, boyfriend’s dad / dad’s best friend / best friend’s dad, etc. we can discuss what we like best! but in terms of the relationship, i would really love for y/c to be sort of hard, stoic, uncaring to those he doesn’t have attachment to, harsh even? and for m/c to be the opposite, a sweet girl who’s genuine and maybe a little naive. i’d love for it to be almost like a she fell first but he fell harder dynamic. where maybe she becomes infatuated with him and he can clearly see it and he’s dismissive at first but the more time he spends around her, the more obsessed he becomes with both preserving her innocence and corrupting her? there could be a little cat and mouse vibes when maybe she realizes that he wants her too?

a tiny little bit about me: i’m 21+, she/her, est. i’m a pretty active partner meaning i can reply at least once if not multiple times a day and i’m always around for all the fun ooc stuff! i like to be friends with my partners because i find that it’s easier to both get invested that way. be prepared for headcanons, musings, playlists, boards — the whole lot! all i ask is that you’re 18+, comfortable with nsfw and darker material generally and use realistic fcs. i’m always happy to take suggestions of fcs from my partners so it would be great if you’re the same too. let’s build a dynamic for us both to long-term obsess over! if this is your vibe, like this and i’ll be on my way to you asap!

like if interested!

[bronzeshadows]

Location

Panaema is a (boarding) school for the children and descendants of the divine, hidden beyond a veil of mist, of magic. Named so because the school was built upon a blood soaked field. To get there, one needs to find a patch of nature. In this day and age, a park will do (provided that there aren't any prying mortal eyes, even though the existence of mythological monsters, deities and creatures is kind of an open secret at this point). Once there, one only needs to sing the song that Orpheus sang when he attempted to free his wife from the Underworld. If sung correctly, the Earth weeps, and the entrance to Panaema will reveal itself.

Monsters

All the monsters are real - from the Aeternae to the Ketea Indikoi - but the one who causes the most trouble is Cacia, a daemon with ties to Hercules. In Panaema canon, she is not just a daughter of the night but also a daughter of magic.

Major Characters

Khalida Samay: adoptive granddaughter of Geras Senectus, descendant of Pandaie, daughter of Hercules. (FC: Iman Vellani)

Chthonia "Thonia" Argyris: an amazon in training and the daughter of a giant that Hercules killed, who has nightmares about Amphritrite turning her and her siblings into birds after they pitch themselves off a cliff. (FC: Ally Ioannides)

Alcides "Al" Hasapi: a gargarean in training, who has yet to prove himself and strongly prefers peace over bloodshed despite the fact that his name essentially translates to strong butcher. Gargareans are pretty much the male equivalent of Amazons. (FC: Odiseas Georgiadis)

Eryx Bellini: the son of Aphrodite, who shares his first name with an ancient son of Poseidon. Not a huge fan of boxing, despite what others might say. Khalida's love interest. (FC: Gavin Casalegno)

Kassiani Jeong-Demopoulos: descendant of the oracle Xenoclea. (FC: Lola Tung)

Ione: descendant of Asclepius, has healing powers. Is also Thonia's ex. (FC: Elena Kampouris)

Agreus and Nomios Katsaros: twin sons of Pan.

Descendants of Macaria, Eucleia and Manto (all of them are daughters of Heracles in Panaema canon): they form a group of three.

Other important characters

Linus: son of Apollo, teacher at the school. Fears dogs. Loves astrology. Always wears gloves. Ione is his favorite pupil and she swears up and down that he's actually not that bad of a guy, just the human equivalent of a grumpy cat. Turns out that he can make people sick with just a single touch.

Hercules: The man, the myth, the legend.

Notes of importance

All the myths are real. All the lore is real. The focus in this story will be on how Indian and Greek lore intersects. And also on Hercules.

The government(s) know(s) about everything being real and they struck a deal: their help against monsters and in turn, they are granted a safe space to train the heroes of tomorrow. Think Motherland Fort Salem x Percy Jackson x Legacies.

In regards to fancasting the characters: I'll try my best to go for Greek actors and actresses where I can but seeing as this is my big brain baby, I'm also just going to fancast my favorite actors and actresses.

Some of the characters mentioned have died in their myths. How are they alive again? They resurrected people through the Adonis programme: souls were snatched from Elysium and Asclepius made them new bodies. Hercules being one of the first.

The mathematics probably doesn't add up timeline wise but I have dyscalculia.

More kids / descendants of Hercules will pop up at some point.

Tracy Spiridakos, Marie Avgeropoulos, Adele Exarchopoilos, Athena Karkanis and Melina Kanakaredes will also be fancasted into this project as teachers at some point.

[wynterlanding]

RULES & GUIDELINES >>

Welcome to my single muse blog for fandomless original character LANDON B. WYNTER: a photojournalist ( or filmmaker depending on verse choice) featuring various aus. This blog is written by a 25+ mun, known as ash, she/her @ est timezone. Ya gurl is a bi disaster boo here to write & create with other people. Been writing for ages and used to do forum groups. Tumblr is a 5+ year writing experience now. My blog is rated 25+ so any future followers/writing partners must be at least this for me to follow and interact. This space is highly selective & private. Please do not follow if you never plan to reach out or interact. I’m mutuals only so if you unfollow me, I will unfollow you so PLS softblock so we are no longer mutuals if you wish to break. I will hardblock those who do not follow this or anyone I do not want to see in my sphere. It’s nothing personal. I PREFER NOVELLA. I write detailed, continuous stories. Short threads and short back & forth don't do it for me. I lose interest fast.

If you have my fc banned I block for both our comfort & if you interacted at one point & ban my fc that’s a perma blacklist for my comfort. Zero interaction equals me breaking mutuals by softblocking as I’m upfront about being an equal energy roleplayer. I don’t drop threads often but I will if I feel you are no longer interested. I thrive on ooc communication & interactions on my posts. I gladly return the energy. Mains are prioritized with affiliates always being a focal point. Transparency in how I run my blog is important so I stop replying as frequently if: I feel you lost interest, never communicate, ghost in messages & stopped communicating as often, or I just do not get anything back frequently. It’s pretty telling. I will also reply to what I have muse for from now on & most often it’s those who show me equal interaction, replies and ooc. Equal energy means putting forth effort so actions speak louder than words in this rpc.

Read my exclusives linked on my opens first before responding. If you use someone already on there I will ignore the response. For posts: I use small text, a few bolded words in red here and there. I WILL interact with mobile users as I always cut posts anyway. Use gifs, gif icons, static icons it’s cool with me! I can go gifless as well. You don’t need fancy aesthetics I personally just like making them. Format + use whatever you’re comfortable with.

There will be serious topics & darker themes that Landon may cover, investigate & explore as a journalist. He may create & produce darker horror oriented fare in his filmmaker universe. THIS BLOG IS PARTLY A HORROR BLOG. Horror themes will be present so be cautious of this while following. There are a few things I will not write: s.exual a.ssault, r.ape. No cheating / love triangle plots due to Lan’s past toxic relationship. These are triggers for the character and it will honestly not give much in terms to work with. Cross shipping is a big no and if happens I will end the interaction. No interest in heavy kink stuff or abo. Smut will appear only with established ships. I won’t do it for first interactions & we can fade to black, imply, write it out or whatever you prefer. I’m honestly selective in following smut only blogs so if it’s smut only all the time I won’t be following.

I practice reblog & meme karma. If you send me things I will send things. So pls REBLOG FROM THE SOURCE. Keep in mind my inbox is the slowest part of my blog. I much prefer threads / plotting over memes. They tend to sit a while. If you send me a meme for a first interaction & haven’t actually talked to me with ideas it’ll take much longer for me to respond.

Following me over and over will get you a hardblock. I won’t follow back those who write child muses, if all your muses are under 21 (Landon is a grown man so if it’s not one of his ship universe kids no thanks); I will not follow blogs that post a lot of irl politics. I run an rp blog and it’s my hobby escape. Call outs and vaguing will make me unfollow. Keep ooc drama out of my realm please. Due to experiences from now on I will not follow blogs first.

Dms are open to mutuals only. Yes I have discord, no I will not give it out randomly. We have to talk a lot ooc and if we gel + you have genuine interest in writing together then I’ll feel comfortable to. I DO NOT WRITE ON DISCORD so please stop asking.

Straight up I am someone who practices exclusivity with others. It’s a huge preference. I have had to unfollow people for face chasing/collecting or making me feel uncomfortable seeking my muse’s face AFTER we have plotted and/or interacted. So consider this me saying I do not rp with others using my muse’s face. He is part of a bigger universe I have created connected with my side multi @wyntertales reserved for mutuals from this blog only. If you already write with my fc and follow, I probably will not follow you back. It’s nothing personal but I’m good with my current space of writing partners.

Lan will have romantic relationships with female presenting/f/nb muses. Preferably won’t ship under 24 & never below 21. Gifs are dropped on smut threads. Smut is tagged: usfw, usfw tw, suggestive tw, as i whisper in your ear i wanna tear you apart. smut.

Banned thangs. This list is short & I truly ain’t vibin or wanna follow:

Amber Heard Ariana Grande Ezra Miller Gugu Mbatha Raw Ed Westwick Madelyn Cline

others using Penn Badgley (for obvious reasons)

blogs writing celebs as themselves

child muses

personal blogs

rp groups (some have followed before and I don’t know why lol)

[starburstfloat]

The Female Gaze in 2521: On Empowered Female Characters and Healthy Masculinity

Y’all I’m so excited to dive into this!

If you’re a kdrama fan, then by now you’ve probably caught on that kdramas often incorporate “the female gaze”. While it’s debated what’s considered the female gaze, we can all conclude that it is different from the omnipresent male gaze in media.

The male gaze describes the visual or aesthetic presentation of women in a way that depicts them as sexual objects, with personalities that tend to center towards men or their fantasies of how women "should" behave. That’s a bit of an oversimplification, but if you watch literally any popular show or movie, you’ll quickly notice the male gaze because it’s woven into the camerawork, the characterization, or body language of the characters on screen. See if you can catch it here.

Not so subtle, right? Kdramas are not free from it, either, but it is worth noting that kdramas do tend to pull an opposing card, namely the female gaze.

This tends to center female characters as being a spectator rather than an object, and typically holding more agency, meaning they lead their lives and choices. The male characters are often characterized as charming, sweet, polite, and romantic.

I see two forms of the female gaze in 2521: first, the empowered female characters and their depiction on screen; second, the portrayal of healthy masculinity in the leading male characters. 

Since this would actually become a literal essay if I tried to encompass every instance or relevant detail, I’m limiting it to just a few observations. But trust me, this show is abundant with many more. If you want to discuss it more, feel free to message me - I’m a nerd for this shit haha

Anyway, leggo~

Let’s start with our empowered protagonists (abbreviated to FC for Female Character from here on)!

Hee Do’s character is a take on the classic “I’m not like other girls” trope but thankfully the writers have spun it into a refreshingly animated and enlivened perspective. She is loud, sometimes adorably obnoxious, a little childish, and passionate. Contrary to the typical loud kdrama FC, she is innocent but not naive. Also contrary to other FCs, she does not seek a love interest. Her main goal is to improve her fencing and transfer to the school where her idol trains.

I like how Yi Jin’s presence in Hee Do’s life lifts her up and helps her accomplish her goals, but he’s not an absolute necessity. This kdrama could very well have orbited around the high school friend group and Hee Do would still succeed. This is pretty poignant, since Yi Jin being there merely enriches her life. She still ultimately has agency over her choices and dreams.

Also, let’s highlight how none of these FC are sexualized, be it their school uniforms, fencing gear, or the beach scene. Yes, Korea is much more conservative with these things, and yes, I think the writers and directors were cognizant of the thin line they were treading with the age gap and Hee Do being a minor for a while. But still! I think it’s worth celebrating and pointing out that they often show her wearing her red tracksuit pants under her skirt while no one else does. 

Seungwan is another FC who shines so well with the female gaze. She’s the one who makes an active effort to call out the abuse of the teachers at her school. She is an active participant in her life - she makes a clear stand that she will no longer tolerate witnessing abuse. Her agency is clear: she’s not backing down, and not stooping down to threats of being expelled.

Instead, she whips a reverse uno card and goes fuck this place, I’m leaving. That’s not to say empowerment comes without vulnerability and emotion. I think that’s what I enjoy so much about FCs done well in kdramas contrary to western media lately, because western media female empowerment these days seems to be “see, I’m a heartless bitch, watch me stand up for my beliefs and not even cry”. So when Seungwan explains the situation to her mom and says she’s sorry and starts crying in her mother’s embrace, it makes her moment of courage to leave and stand for her values that much stronger.

It’s brave because it has a toll. It’s brave because it’s an unfair situation to be put into. Crying about it makes that reality crash down on us much harder. Also, can we celebrate how this drama doesn’t attempt to give us beautiful crying scenes? A lot of male gaze centric media will make even women’s suffering an aesthetic viewing experience. But this? Not at all. We got runny noses, snot, creased eyebrows and sobbing breaths and shaking shoulders. Beauty isn’t the focus. It’s the feeling. 

This feels like a good transition into part 2: healthy masculinity! Because! Let me tell you!! We have plenty of kdramas with men crying, sure. But I’ve never seen performances like this where 1) male crying is filmed in such an intimate way and 2) where the female lead is framed as the dominant comfort - but not an emotionless hero, either.

Let’s talk about Jiwoong’s crying scene on the rooftop when he found out Seungwan was leaving.

The camerawork doesn’t shy away from showing the growing hurt and welling tears in his eyes. She comes over to hug him, swooping her arms over his shoulders even though he’s the taller one. We see him cover his face but not shy away from letting it out. She pats him on the back. It’s refreshing to see a male character cry without him having to throw things or break shit lmao like men can just stand there and cry and allow women to see them like this. 

Transition into Yi Jin’s crying scenes (oh man, Nam Joo Hyuk is my favorite actor for a reason: you can read his face so perfectly without him needing to speak). Yi Jin’s crying scenes are also devoid of being overly dramatic while still encompassing the intensity of his feelings and the weight of the moment. The scene that stands out the most to me is in episode 8 when he’s doing the live reporting via the hotel room but his computer crashes.

The deafening silence hits the audience hard. It’s meant to feel like a slap in the face because we’re meant to sit in his shock for a bit. The shock, denial, anger, and sadness washes over him as the camera centers a closeup of his face. He shakily puts down the phone, gets up, collapses next to the hotel bed, lifts up the sheets, and shouts - and I mean fucking shouts - into the duvet. This happens as the camera pans out so we all go from feeling caught up in his emotional turmoil to feeling the spaciousness of the room around him; how he’s so alone, how he has no one to rely on in this moment.

I fucking held my breath man. Because this felt so intimate. We don't normally see male characters on screen break down like this. And if so, it might be framed in an aesthetic or artistic way or even sexual way, like crying in the shower. This was just...plain hard truth. That shit was intense. Can I just say? Oscar worthy, my dude. 

The second moment that stands out combines the two observations! We get an empowered FC and a representation of healthy masculinity all in one! That’s right peeps, I’m talking the tunnel crying scene.

God, what a performance. Note how the camerawork highlights that he is collapsed and lower than her.

Hee Do is the one holding his face. She’s the one who caresses his tears away. And mind you, even though we’re talking the Very Handsome Baek Yi Jin here, he is still a snotty crying mess. In traditional media, this visual is very much a male-dominant gaze: a helpless woman being saved by a heroic male protagonist in her moment of vulnerability, held in his arms, her tears being wiped away. This scene flipped the script, though. It’s beautiful to see a female character in this role. And again, just like with Seungwan, it’s not to say that she, being the hero in this moment, is devoid of emotion either. No, she cries too. She cries because she sees him, sees his pain. She doesn’t let it eat away at her and let her spiral. It isn’t an overly dramatic moment of hysteria and tears. It’s an acknowledgement: I see you. I understand you. Which is why their romance is all the more special. These are two people who have now seen each other at their worst. And they still choose to be gentle and soft and caring because the world around them is cruel enough.

What are your thoughts? Overall, I keep finding ways to celebrate this kdrama. Be it the writing, the visual directing and color theory, the character development and character arcs…….there’s just nothing quite like it. And I don’t think there will be something like it for a while. Hopefully this sets the new standard.

Love you fam :) Thanks for reading!

Peace out~

[belmottetower]

Ask meme: Sam/Rebecca

When I started shipping it if I did: In the first episode where all the team walks past Rebecca and Sam and Roy are the only two to greet her.

Ok, ok I didn't quite ship it this early, but the seeds were definitely sown when they sent Sam to get Rebecca to come along to the curse breaking ceremony. Why Sam, huh? WHAT DID THE REST OF THE TEAM SEE?!

My thoughts: Sam/Rebecca are my favourite endgame ship for both of them. I love that before their relationship starts they do already have some really nice moments in S1 - the above corridor hello and office scene, and then in the last episode of season 1 during Ted's speech, Sam and Rebecca sitting next to each other in the dressing room. And when I say sitting next to each other I don't mean Sam is near the front so Rebecca ends up sitting next to him randomly, I mean he is right in the middle so she clearly sought him out. Please see her looking at him in concern as he has his head in his hands, and then in a later shot HER HAND ON HIS SHOULDER and the other resting on/by his thigh! She has her arm around him!

And then in season 2, their relationship starts in such an organic and open way. They don't know who they're talking to, they just know that they have a connection and a spark. And then when they realise who the other is yes Rebecca is hesitant due to the age, but Sam doesn't pause for one second, he is just fucking thrilled!

I know that there are people with concerns about age, but I think Sam is shown to be one of the strongest, most firm in his convictions and frankly the most mature of all the team - and I include Roy in that much as I love him. Rebecca didn't seek him out, it just happened and they worked.

There are other concerns about her being his boss. Aside from the fact that the club owner, day to day, has far less say over the players than the manager does - and players have pretty tight contracts and agents to look after their interests - there is a precedent for this relationship in real life. When Karren Brady was managing director of Birmingham FC she met her husband, a player, married him - and then he was transferred by the club twice during this time, a fact that makes me laugh whenever I think about it.

I do not know if they'll be endgame, they probably won't be, but I really love the way their relationship developed. Also "for next time" and "I'm only going to get more wonderful" are extremely smooth lines. Sam has game.

What makes me happy about them: I love how their relationship started, I love that Sam is so kind and generous - Rebecca deserves that after Rupert. I love that they are so easy and relaxed around each other right from the start. They have great chemistry and I think they are - and would - be so good for each other.

What makes me sad about them: That they will probably not be endgame. But I'm glad I got to see a little bit of it anyway.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: Their relationship being ignored or completely written off as a giant mistake that one or both of them regret People thinking it's problematic because Rebecca is his boss, without minding that Rebeccca is Ted's boss and has far more of a say over Ted's career than she does Sam's

Things I look for in fanfic: Any fanfic about them wherein their relationship is the focus point, and not just a stepping stone or a moment to regret.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: There isn't anyone else on the show I really ship either of them with strongly, but there also isn't anyone I would be uncomfortable with either of them ending up with.

My happily ever after for them: I would like them to get married and live happily ever after and Rebecca doesn't care about a single shitty double standard tabloid article written about her because she has an extremely hot husband who loves her so fuck them.

Who is the big spoon/little spoon: I think Sam is probably the big spoon, but he'd like to be spooned from time to time.

What is their favourite non-sexual activity: Watching films together - Sam wins her over to Ratatouille. They eat out at his restaurant a lot. He does not hire a rat as a chef though.

[axwalker]

CREEP: I’m a creep

HIGH SCHOOL AU 

Pairing: Drake Walker and Lexie O’Brien -- Book TRR 

A/N 1 This came up to me after I got an ask from @nestledonthaveone

I was listening to my iPod on my way home from work yesterday & Radiohead's Creep came on. One of my favorite songs, and I think the lyrics are great for an angsty Drake fic. It reminds me of him. Could you please write an angsty fic inspired by the song? I love how you write angst!!

I used to hear this song when I was a teenager, so when I read this ask, I immediately wanted to write something angsty but situated in high school.

This is part one of two. 

I hope you enjoy it @nestledonthaveone 💕

A/N 2: Because they’re younger than usual, I decided to change my  FC --just for this fic. I’m still picturing Michiel and Valerie when they’ll be older though. 

A/N3: I’m participating in @wackydrabbles Prompt #105   It's definitely ... interesting.”

Thank you ladies! 

WARNINGS: Parental abuse. Eventually some lemons.  ALL MY FICS ARE 18+ 

Tags in the comments. 

LEXIE 

I’ve always loved sunsets. The entire sky is painted orange and pink, streaking with white light and many other colors; I can’t take my eyes away from it. Sunsets remind us that no matter what is happening in our lives, the sun will be out again tomorrow. It’s raw, beautiful, and comforts me—the thought of the sun watching over me. I sit on my porch, my knees against my chest. I’m wearing a white tank top and jean shorts to fight the intense heat that invades Cordonia in early September.  I fix my eyes on the sky, wishing a miracle. Something that takes me away from my father and his new wife. Away from the pain of losing mom.

“What are you doing?” The voice is so resonant, deep, and rasping. Slowly, I sit up and look around, pushing my long, brown hair out of my eyes. I raise my head, and I see him. Drake Walker. 

 My breath catches, and I cross my arms over my breasts, knowing the thin material of my shirt isn’t keeping me remotely modest. What is he doing here? At this time, no less. I go to school with Drake. We’re both sophomores at Valtoria High School. He’s six foot two, with strong shoulders, and has a knowledge of life in his eyes that boys our age simply don’t possess. We have five classes together, and he sits through them like a statue, his chocolate eyes unreadable. Tall, dark, and angry. Handsome in a hard way that makes the other girls nervous when he walks down the hallways. Not me, though. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve stared at him from behind my locker door, breath trapped in my lungs, wondering what he’s thinking of behind his brooding eyes. 

“I asked, what are you doing? This isn’t a safe place to be alone at night. You should get inside.” 

“Inside is no safer.” Why would I say that? My first time talking with this boy, and I tell him my deepest secret? His eyes narrow at me.“I mean, there’s not a lot of crime in this part of Portavira.” That loosens the tension in his broad shoulders. “I’m looking at the sunset. I love it. It’s so beautiful and wild.” I bit my bottom lip noticing his eyes dip to catch the action. 

“It’s definitely ... interesting,” he says, noncommittally. “There are things I like more.” 

“Like what?” I ask. 

He shrugs but looks back down at me, wrestling with something. He lifts a hand, brushing the very tip of his fingers down my cheekbone. “You,” he rasps.

Drake’s deep brown eyes look at me with something I’m only on the cusp of understanding. Is it…lust? His fingers move down my jaw, traveling slowly over the hollow of my throat to tease one of my tank top’s straps. “I like you. I can’t seem to stop…wanting. Wanting you to look at me. Wanting you…period. It’s why I sit behind you in all your classes, O’Brien. You don’t know that?” My knees start to tremble. I’ve always wondered how we end up in the same classes every single semester. He’s arranged for it to happen? He…likes me? That much? Say something, dork. Don’t act like it’s not mutual. 

 As if I haven’t lain my bed after school, when no one is at home and touched myself while thinking of Drake Walker. I must be doing a terrible job of keeping that secret to myself because Drake’s breath begins to grow shallow. “O’Brien.” He drops his forehead to mine, the pads of his thumb rubbing the soft skin of my neck. “Have you ever been kissed?”

I can’t talk, so I shake my head. 

“Please,” he groans. “Let me.” 

My head is spinning. “Let you what?” 

“Kiss you. Finally.” His hands move to cradle my head, making me feel delicate, like something special. His minty breath is close to my ear, setting off an ache low in my belly. “I need to kiss you, O’Brien. I need it.” He leans down and kisses the corner of my lips in the most torturous, exquisite way. My heart is beating wildly in my chest when he puts his soft lips on mine for the first time. My first kiss is an amazing one. He bends his head, and his mouth finds mine with soft pressure. I thought he would be rough or impatient may be clumsy, but I didn’t expect the gentle way his lips caress mine. The way he coaxes my own lips apart before I’m even aware of it. My knees buckle, but he holds me firmly against him. He kisses me as if this wasn’t our first time but our last. It’s the most erotic moment of my life, but all too son Drake leaves my lips. I only feel urgency. Want so deep that it burns inside of me.  It has existed between us all along, hasn’t it? Not one-sided. A yearning pull between two people, orbiting each other in the earthly, incongruous setting of school. 

Drake opens his mouth to say something, but my name is shouted in the distance. From inside the house. With glittering eyes, Drake drops his hands to his side, though it obviously pains him to do so. He gives me a chaste kiss on my cheek. One second later, the back door of my house opens, revealing my father, his imposing frame backlit by the interior. 

“Alexis!” I start to tremble; I try to speak, but I can’t. ““What are you doing out here this late?” There’s a tight smile in his voice. “Did you come out here to retrieve the handyman?” I do a double-take, noticing the strain forming around the corners of Drake’s mouth. 

“Handyman?” 

“Yes.” My father chuckles, coming forward to clap a hand down on Drake’s tense shoulder. “He’s here to repair a leak in the attic. Liam called you by the way.” Drake can’t look at me now, his gaze cast over my shoulder. Empty. A minute ago, we were equals. But my father’s words have called into focus one very important thing. I’m rich, and he’s very poor. It just didn’t matter. To me, it still doesn’t. But the economic divide between us is deepening by the second. 

“Why don’t you get to it?” My father suggests to Drake, his tone hard. “Alexis has to study. She is going places.”

 I down my gaze to the ground, humiliation burning up my throat. My father is an expert at belittling people, and he’s just done it to Drake. I want to say something to make it better, to defend Drake, but I know I’ll only be making it worse. I’ll have to wait until tomorrow to offer Drake an apology. At school. I’ll talk to him then. 

“Yes, sir,” Drake responds stiffly, turning on his boots and stalking toward the house. Behind his back, my father reaches over and digs his thumb into my bicep until I double over, releasing a silent scream. He lets go a moment before Drake glances back over his shoulder, eyes hooded, and my expression is serene. Because I know better than to let anyone see the pain. My father has never been physically abusive, but his temper is getting worse. He hated mom and he’s taking it out on me. As soon as we’re in the house, I run up the stairs to my room and lock the door, leaning back against it. Listening to Drake’s boots walk back and forth in the attic. More than anything, I want to go up there. Feel his hands on me again. Cherishing hands, instead of hateful ones. I ache for that. For him. But an hour later, Drake leaves, and that’s when I face the consequences. My father knocks on my door. When I open it, the look on his eyes let me know it’s going to be worse than usual. 

“If I ever see you talking to that boy again, so help me God, I’ll kick you out of this house.” His face is contorted with rage. “Then, I’ll ruin him, too. I’ll make his life even harder in this town. You know I can do it. I can have him cast off that filthy land and no one will ever hire him again. Is that what you want?” 

“No,” I whisper. 

“No,” he sneers, mocking me. “Never look at him again. Do you hear me? My daughter does not associate with penniless dirt. The only boy you’re allow to date is Liam Rys. No one else.” 

“I won’t. I promise.” 

“See that you keep that promise. Or you’ll both pay the price.” And I pay a good deal of it that night when dad slaps me for the first time. The next day at school, I don’t look at Drake in the hallway. I don’t pause in the doorway of our classes, absorbing the sight of him waiting at the desk behind me. I simply keep my head down and try not to show the bruise on my cheek. On my body and my heart. I could never have predicted he would hate me for it.

 Drake

 Two years later 

I walk past O’Brien in the hallway and slam my fist against the locker to her left, making her jump. Shame, frustration, and resentment have been like a poison inside me, rotting my bones every second of the last two years, ever since that night in her garden when she tricked me into thinking she felt the same. Maybe she did. Until her father reminded her that I’m nothing but a poor handyman. Yeah, she remembered pretty quickly that she’s better than me. Good enough to date a rich quarterback like Rys but definitely not a low life like me. Rich, stuck-up brat. What’s worse is that she fucking ruined me with those lips. She brought me to my knees. Made me reveal myself in ways I’ve never done with anyone. And now? Now she’s left me lonely and fuck-starved for two years. Obsessed with her, unable to let her go and hating her guts for it. Because she won’t even look at me anymore. I’m nothing but the dirt beneath her spotless sneakers. Two years ago, I decided that if she was going to make my life hell by ignoring me after what we shared, then I could return the favor. So I do. By tormenting her. That’s the only term for it. I torture her, and I hate that—I fucking hate it—but so be it. My jaw is close to shattering as I watch O’Brien calmly collect the books from her locker and hurry toward our next class. On top of being a bully, I’m also a masochist because I still trick the school into having the same five classes every year. My aunt Leona works in the front office, and she feels bad for me because of my dad dying and my mom abandoning me when I was still in middle school, leaving me in the trailer alone. Not bad enough to invite me to live with her family, but bad enough that she slips me O’Brien’s schedule every semester so I can match it to mine. Before I follow her, I stop at her locker, sliding something in it, and continue on my way. When I walk into class behind her a moment later, I slow to a stop in the doorway at the sight of Rys kneeling to speak with O’Brien where she sits at her desk—cajoling a smile out of her. She refused to date him two years ago, but fucking Liam didn’t get the memo. No one has as much money as his father in this town. If  Rys is asking her out again, she’d probably say yes. If I let it get that far, which I won’t. I never do. She’s mine. Only mine. 

[magatsunohana]

Getting to Know the Mun

Basics

Name: Kei

Age: Too old. 32

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her/They

Sexuality: Demi

Zodiac Sign: Pisces

Take or Single?: Yes.

Three Facts About Me

1. I... absolutely love Alexander the Great. I've been collecting so many books on him that I even have one about the logistics of his army. In the books that I've read, there are mentions of books and plays that he enjoyed reading, so I did my best to find copies of it. From Historical Fiction to Historical Non-Fiction I try to collect as much as I can so I can delve into his personality better, and how he's portrayed by different writers overtime. I try to get as many historical sources as well both from people who write him in a positive light and a negative light, so that I can understand him better. Just coz I like him doesn't mean I condone some of the heinous things he's done throughout history... and there are some that are very atrocious. But you can't expect a perfect ruler to exist. That's simply not possible. But it doesn't mean that he wasn't a good ruler. He has his ups and downs, like every one else. But him being very hands on and leading his troops personally always garners my respect. Aaaand annoyance when that almost kills him.

2. Locally, I have one story that was published as part of a Mythology Anthology series. My contract with the publisher ended a long time ago so we're able to post it and do with it as we please. If ever you're interested, you can check it out over here.

3. One of my dreams is to one day be able to read Cuneiform/Ancient Sumerian Script because I want to read directly from the tablet where The Epic of Gilgamesh is inscribed. So, there is a channel on Youtube called the Digital Hammurabi which teaches you how to read Ancient Sumerian script. ADDITIONALLY, tiny thing I found online. Caster Gilgamesh's Noble Phantasm, Malammu Dingir doesn't make sense as a phrase, generally. As 'Melammu' is the borrowed Akkadian of Melam/Melim, while Dingir is Sumerian in nature. If I remember correctly, for it to make sense it should be phrased as 'Melamdingira' which would then mean "A Deity's Splendor". As Melammu Dingir, these are just two nouns strewn together.

How long [have you been roleplaying?]: I am too lazy to do the math, but I started during 2006.

How'd you start?: I actually started in a forum. Back then, Animelyrics.com had Roleplaying forums which were pretty easy to get into. So I mostly did stuff there. Eventually, I'd transfer to Yahoo Chatrooms for real time roleplaying. It's very fun. Buuut there were issues and the Yahoo Chatrooms had to be shutdown.

Muse Preferences

Female or Male? Both?: Both~

Favorite Face: Aaaah, my favorite face is Hori Kyouko. But I usually use her as my mun Icon. I love Hori. Along with the entire Hori Household. Specially Kyousuke because he's so stupid.

Least Favorite Face: I don't really think I have a least favorite face... AH. I hate Malty's face... if I have to choose. I mean, he design is pretty and I totally support anyone's use of her as an FC, but it's just her character, how she did Naofumi dirty. I see her face, it grinds my gears.

Writing Preferences

Fluff, Angst, or Smut?: Mostly, fluff and angst. Depending on my mood though, I usually gear more towards angst. Let's hurt each other when we plot. UwU

Plots or Memes?: Both. Both is good. Both is definitely good.

Are you like your muse(s)?: I guess there are some things that are similar, but I wouldn't say we're very much alike. At the very least, I wouldn't do majority of the atrocious things that my muses will do, if the chance was offered to me and no consequences will be suffered. Sometimes, I like to think that I'm actually a fairly nice person compared to my muses. But my muses would beg to differ, and call me a sadist because I put all of them through hell.

tagged by: @twisted-legacies, @xpeculiariity (Thank you!)

Tagging: Steal it from me~ and tag me when you do~