#healthy heart vs unhealthy heart

[jacquesthepigeon]

Re the stalking thing and the anon wanting to hear from people who have been stalked: Hi, that's me and a loved one who also watched this show!

For the most part, Marinette is not written like a stalker. She's written like an obsessed fangirl. She doesn't really follow Adrien around outside of school, she only shows up to public events/appearances, and all of the pictures on her walls are professional photos, not things that she took in secret. Her chest of gifts is all things for future birthdays, not things that she's bombarding him with constantly to make him feel unsafe.

I'm not saying that her behavior is healthy, it's one of my least favorite elements of the show and I can see why it would be triggering if you've been stalked. But in terms of what she actually does vs the behaviors associated with stalkers, she's either not one at all or in the very most proto stages of becoming one.

I don't think her actions are funny or even appropriate for a kids show (call me old fashioned, but I think main characters who are meant to win kids hearts should portray healthy behavior or have their unhealthy behavior addressed and corrected) I think they leaned way too hard into the fangirl thing, ignoring how differently that plays if you actually know the person that you're a fan of.

Her worst behaviors are also clearly exaggerated to absurdity. Like knowing his schedule for the next three years? No one knows their schedule for the next three years! This is clearly absurdist humor. The toned down, realistic version of this joke is that she knows when his weekly activities take place because of course she does. They're classmates and that stuff repeats every week. I knew my high school crushes schedule, too. I didn't actively seek it out. I just saw it repeat enough times to know it by heart.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[sciderman]

im so happy for you that you have a possible reason/cause for your brain itch!!!! i hope the tumor removal goes superduper smoothly. Do they know how long its been present/growing???????? how did you find out??? <- you obviously do not have to answer these personal medical questions lmao im just!!!! so curious and excited for you.

from what i've discussed with the docs it's been there for a LONG time... they say this sort of thing might take up to a decade to develop - it doesn't happen overnight!

i think i started noticing symptoms about maybe... 7 years ago? literally as soon as i started working full-time, maybe. my first job stressed me out so much and i cried underneath the tables at 8pm because i couldn't leave the office, i still had so much to do. i was leading up an entire ass animation department at 20 years old. bad. awful. that's when i started depending on things to get me through the day. my body started feeling awful. i thought it was anxiety, or me just being weak, i guess. i don't know if stress created the tumor, or the tumor created the stress - (well, it's the latter now) i think it's probably both, but all the research i've done and what the doctors have said is that there's just - some people with a genetic predisposition for it.

it's funny - i never miss a deadline, and i'm really really good at my job, always. i never let anyone down, ever, at the cost of my own sanity, and i seem to always, always have it put-together when i'm dealing with people - i have the constant consensus from everybody around me that i'm the most cheerful person to work with on this here planet earth - but apparently, my body was falling apart underneath it all - which i failed to recognise, because outwardly i was holding it together so well, and figured it was just normal to cry all the time when nobody was looking.

i started really noticing it after taking on a lot of freelance work on top of my day job – i was really doing very hot, and did these amazing projects for some really amazing clients who sought me out for being amazing (i am amazing) - but naturally, had consecutive nights of no sleep, and quick deadlines - and INVOICING... screams. and just, realised - after taking those jobs that - my heart did not stop pumping afterwards. my heart was still racing a mile a minute, even after all those jobs were done and dusted and ever-so-loved and appreciated by very happy clients. my heart. wouldn't. stop.

i figured it was MAJOR anxiety, and sought out some counselling sessions, hoping they'd help. i relayed my woes. i said i'm worried i'm not resting enough. i'm not sleeping enough. my heart rate won't go down. they said "oh. not everybody needs 8 hours sleep, don't worry about it. everyone's different." - for some reason that reassured me. i thought it was okay. okay. i don't need rest. maybe my body's just different and doesn't need rest. maybe that's why i wake up at 6am every morning without fail. i just don't need sleep, i guess. (bad advice.)

so – everyone is telling me i'm okay. i should just get on. you're barely sleeping? that's fine, you probably don't need it. your heart is pumping? that's healthy. your heart SHOULD pump, idiot. get back to work.

i felt very unhappy at work - i felt like i was stagnating - so i moved job, last year. i moved job to one that was so, so much more fast-paced. i thought the excitement and change would do me good - but i've been facing maybe - 3 deadlines a day? vs my previous one-deadline-a-month arrangement. and i think it broke me. i needed to depend on so many unhealthy habits to get me through the day. i needed like 6 energy drinks, 3 coffees, i'd have the shakes, i'd have the jitters, i'd feel like i was going to fall apart every single day.

and then, one day, i did.

one week last year i doubled over - my body was in so much pain that i couldn't sleep, i couldn't eat, and worst off - i couldn't work. it was the first time i'd taken sick leave - i couldn't function. after being on antibiotics that didn't work, i eventually went into the emergency room because i just couldn't sleep. i couldn't do anything. i didn't care if they put me down, i wanted the pain to end.

she was a kidney stone. her name was sharon (sharon stone) - i suspect it was all the energy drinks that made her. i've dealt with her now. but during the process, the doc pulled me aside, and he said "dear. do you have any pain in your other kidney?"

i said... no............... why?

doc said "ah. problem for another time."

so, once sharon was dealt with, obviously i had to chase up on that doctor's ominous warning. i said "WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY OTHER KIDNEY!!"

you have a tumor, dear. his name is lamar. he's on your right adrenal gland, and we suspect he's messing up all your hormones.

i did my own research, and turns out all these crazy, mysterious symptoms i've been having all line up - so i chased, and chased, and chased.

the doctors didn't take me seriously at first. because i guess i'm not in pain, and i handle it so well. i'm still so strong. i'm a fighter, i guess. whatever. but, turns out...

it's worth it to chase. your life might depend on it. i'm so glad i did, because there's an end to my suffering (dear god, i hope) - but, guys, if your heart won't slow, and you chronically can't relax, and you feel like there are bees in your brain - that's the time to do some research. it isn't normal, actually. and sure - it might not be a tumor, but - kid, you need some support. you need some help. you need to ask some questions. it's not okay for that to be your baseline. your body needs to rest. it needs to rest. even if i have to force it to. it has to rest.

right now i'm in a major stressed way, and i broke down and cried. i'm in the middle of a freelance job, and in the middle of an interviewing process for a new full-time job, and still working my current full-time job with 3 deadlines a day, and my surgery is next week. and i feel like crying. all the time.

i can't wait for rest. i hate that i literally have to be hospitalised to get it. but, i'll get it. i'm going to rest so fucking hard.

[bogleech]

lol remembering when tumblr chuds got mad at me for saying junk food is nutritious because they didn’t understand that “nutritious” simply means “rich in nutrients” and that the problem with certain foods is simply that those useful nutrients are harmful in excess. That, and having any visible fat was their sole personal measure of healthy vs. unhealthy so they based their personalities and morals around their keto diets, which would have been raising their bad cholesterol all along and I wonder how many of them learned the hard way to just eat normal. The ones who haven’t already died of heart failure, I mean.

[misfithive]

What Simon can teach us about boundaries!

Been seeing a lot of Simon hate again lately (mostly on other apps but i’m sure its here too) and it's getting pretty frustrating and honestly a little bit troubling that people think so little of Simon and his needs.

Simon hate feels like some weird connection to the patriarchy/heteronormativity where some people have just decided that it is okay for one person's needs to be ignored in a relationship in order to satisfy the other. Lisa seemed to intentionally try and create a dynamic in their relationship where they see each other as equals. They may struggle to see each others perspectives at times but that is true for literally ANY RELATIONSHIP where two people come together from different walks of life. Both their needs matter and their journey in the relationship is to figure out how to honor the other persons needs while honoring themselves or see if that is even possible.

Sooo I wanted to share some lessons about boundaries that people could learn through Simon instead of talking sh!t about him !!!

1. Boundaries are about what we want and need in a relationship. Sometimes people want different things and thats ok!

People love to say that Simon forced Wilhelm to come out. I even saw someone say that Simon was asking Wilhelm to "give up his family and the throne". No where does Simon ask him to do any of those things. Notice how Simon says "I don't want to be anyones secret"? This is not just about Wille. This is a boundary that he has for himself and the types of relationships that he wants to have. Everyone is allowed to have expectations or want a certain type of relationship. Saying you don’t want to be in a secret relationship is quite a reasonable request. It is also quite reasonable to say that you don't want to be in a public relationship. Sometimes in relationships, what two people need is incompatible at the time which is why it made sense for them to end things. That is the point- for both people to say what they need to feel comfortable and sometimes other people cannot meet your needs- you have to decide if that is a dealbreaker and for Simon at the time it was.

2. Boundaries ≠ manipulation

He tells Wilhelm he take as much time as he needs but you have to do it alone. That is a boundary it is NOT manipulation. He does not try to control Wilhelm or tell Wilhelm what to do. Saying a relationship wont work for you unless certain needs are met or that you dont want to do tons of emotional labor for another person is not manipulation. He is saying I am not okay with being a secret, I am not okay with having my trust broken, i’m not okay with being in a relationship where you say one thing and do another (Wilhelm made a promise he could not keep and even he has owned up to that to Nils). Simon is not saying YOU HAVE TO COME OUT RIGHT NOW OR ELSE. He is not playing mind games or trying to get Wilhelm to change his mind in order to be with him. He is willing to walk away even tho his heart is breaking because he knows it is not possible at that point for Wille and him to get on the same page.

Boundaries have become part of social media language lately thanks to instagram therapists and the like but a lot of people have misconstrued the meaning. Some people call something a boundary when they are actually being controlling. However the purpose of a boundary is about what you yourself are comfortable with, not what other people can/cannot do. Ex: “i am okay with holding hands in public but otherwise I don’t feel comfortable with PDA” (healthy boundary). Vs “you can’t have guy friends because I get jealous” (unhealthy boundary). Boundaries are healthy and necessary for a relationship to be healthy- they are not the same as manipulation or trying to control someone else.

3. What is okay for you does not have to be okay for someone else. Everyone’s boundaries are different because we are all different people with different traumas, needs, experiences, relationships, and limits. I have seen people compare the Wilmon to Narlie where Charlie is okay with Nick wanting to keep things “secret”. Besides the fact that this is a completely different relationship and context, the fun thing about boundaries is that what is okay for you does not have to be okay for someone else! Just because you would have been willing to be Wilhelm’s secret if he asked does not mean that Simon has to. Just because Charlie was willing to to do that for Nick does not mean that Simon has to. Not to mention !!! Nick also acknowledged that is not fair to Charlie and outside of not telling people they had a very loving smooth sailing relationship - people expect Simon to be like Charlie without acknowledging that Wilhelm is not giving the level of trust and security that Nick is. If you want to go there, I'm sure if Wille was acting like Nick being consistent not saying "i'm not like that", "delete my number" etc (regardless of the reason) then maybe Simon would have been more okay with it. This is not Wille hate bc i get it, but sometimes in empathizing with Wille people forget that Simon is a whole human with wants and needs. Simon needs to protect himself and his heart. We all do. Relationships should not require you to subject yourself to pain for someone else. It is healthy to have boundaries and know your needs and what you deserve. And at that point in time Wille could not give him that. Most people watching were quite proud of Simon for that so idk how the narrative got turned to him being selfish.

4. Boundaries can change

It is normal to reassess your boundaries, that does not make them any less valid. Clearly for Simon, once Wilhelm proved his trust more and and Simon reevaluated what he wanted, he decided that he was willing to be a secret if that meant having each other. If he never decided that, it still would have been totally valid. Also noting, there was no compromise/meet in the middle there in Simon deciding that he was willing to be a secret for Wille. It's just funny that Simon is getting the flack for not wanting to "compromise" or meet in the middle when in the end, Simon was willing to do exactly what Wille wanted and he gets ZERO credit from some people for that. Luckily Wilhelm sees what a sacrifice this is for Simon and does not leave Simon to sacrifice alone.

4. Boundaries protect the relationship, build trust and help relationships grow

If Simon had never stood his ground both in s1e6 and throughout s2 Wille would have likely continued the way he was going bc it was comfortable for him and he was understandably scared. They probably would have gotten in even more arguments and honestly i do not think Wille would have been forced to mature and consider Simons feelings in the way he eventually did. I know people resist Edvin calling Wille selfish but Simon has to constantly keep telling Wille “what about me? What about my family? Do you see how hard this is for me?” For some reason viewers are interpreting that as selfish ?? In a relationship you really should not have to be constantly reminding someone to consider you and your feelings.

Simon setting boundaries and saying what he wanted only made their relationship stronger even tho they had to take some time apart. Protecting yourself and wanting a healthy balanced relationship where your needs are considered as much as the other person’s is not selfish. And anyone who tells you that it is does not have your best intentions at heart. Simon is not saying his needs are MORE important than Wille’s he is saying that his needs matter TOO and are EQUALLY IMPORTANT to Wille’s. Which was the journey he needed to go on (as stated by his sister) and the journey that Wille needed to go on as well in order to create a healthy dynamic together.

Setting boundaries is hard but worth it in the end!!!

So yeah! I hope you all set some boundaries today or use this info to argue with simon antis 💖

—————-

Disclaimer// I am not a therapist i just do workshops with teens about healthy relationships and it is a passion of mine.

[rainytypology]

Enneagram system

A rewrite/more in depth post of the Enneagram system compared to my last post on it. Not an expert. May change later.

If you like kpop and typology, check out my blog. I do type analysis on idols and typology notes.

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What is Enneagram?

I mainly took notes from Riso Hudson theory.

A typology system that categorizes personalities into 9 different types. Each type is numbered from 1 - 9.

Each type has a desire and fear that motivates their actions in life.

Core and Wings

Core: Our main type. It is the foundation of our personality and does not change.

Wing: Acts as a complement to our core. Wing can be one of the two types that sit beside core type. E.g a core 2 can have a 1 wing (2w1) or 3 wing (2w3). But is not necessary to use since wings can change and/or can be balanced.

Levels of Development

Summary of healthy - unhealthy levels of personality

- Healthy levels -

Level 1: Liberation

Let go of self image so we are free to express ourselves however we want. Self acceptance of all traits.

Level 2: Pyschological Capacity

Begin to identify with positive qualities in our personalities and learn to improve ourselves with them.

Level 3: Social Value

Still strongly identify with our set self image and make effort to maintain image. Want to share our good talents and abilities to make a positive effect on self and others.

- Average levels -

Level 4: Imbalance/Social roles

Idealization of self image; have a major focus on either good or bad qualities, no in between. Fear is an obstacle here.

Level 5: Interpersonal Control

Insist on self image being accepted by others, which can cause conflict. Can lead to controlling and manipulation.

Level 6: Overcompensation

Overcompensate due to underlying negative feelings. Desperate for others' acceptance.

- Unhealthy levels -

Level 7: Violation

Desperation for acceptance leads to violation of one's self and others. Serious conflict can occur. May victimize themselves to excuse offensive actions.

Level 8: Obsession and Compulsion

May be overly obsessed with an image of who they want to be. Deceives others

Level 9: Pathological Destructiveness

Most unhealthy state, display very toxic traits and behaviours, may have mental breakdown

Disintegration vs Integration

Or basically Stress vs Growth

Disintegration: When under heavy amounts of stress, a type will go into their disintegration type. They will pick up the negative traits of that type and act like the unhealthy version of it.

Integration: When maturing/developing positively, a type will go their integration type. They will pick up the positive traits of that type and improve their character.

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* I will only give short descriptions for the triads. I will explain more in depth in individual posts.*

Centers of Intelligence

There are 3 centers of intelligence. Each center shows how and why we solve issues in life.

Gut/Instinct/Anger (types 1, 8, 9)

Gut center focuses on reacting and taking action immediately. This triad has an issue with control and anger.

1: Often perfectionists who repress their anger in order to remain morally good. They see their anger in a negative light.

8: The most open and comfortable with their anger. Uses it to assert boundaries, especially since this type fears vulnerability.

9: Often a passive type that dismisses or downplays their anger. They fear conflict and may worry being more assertive will cause a negative effect on themselves and others.

Heart/Image/Shame (types 2, 3, 4)

Heart center focuses on self identity and connections. This triad wants love and recognition and do what they believe is best to get that. They struggle with self worth.

2: They want to be needed and helpful to others. Pride themselves on being of service. Wants to receive love and to give love.

3: The most image oriented type. They always try to show their best selves and best efforts in order to seem admirable. Fears being worthless.

4: Wants to create a unique image for themselves, believes being boring will make them unloveable.

Head/Thinking/Fear (types 5, 6, 7)

Head center focuses on ideas, making rational decisions, and gathering info. This triad deals with fear and uncertainty.

5: The most internalized head type. 5's want to gather as much knowledge and resources as possible in order to stay secure and independent.

6: Quite an anxious type who seeks security through relations with others.

7: This type fears pain and suffering and seek out experiences in order to avoid negativity.

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Other triads

- Harmonic Triads -

How types handle conflict, coping mechanism

Reactive (4, 6, 8)

Reactive types are not afraid to show and speak about their true feelings. They may seem "dramatic" in a way.

4: Melodramatic and self absorbed in negative feelings, drowns in intensity

6: Will argue, stick up for the right thing, moody, anxious

8: Big and loud reactions, can be very fiery

Positive (2, 7, 9)

Positive types dislike negativity and conflict and have their own ways of avoiding such tension. Optimistic during hard times.

2: Actively tries to be a good and kind person, only tries to focus on the good aspects of people

7: Seeks out fun opportunities to make their life exciting (basically distraction)

9: Values harmony and peace, will not risk any type of action that will disturb these values

Competency (1, 3, 5)

Competent types are often perfectionists who want to show their best selves. Objective and rational.

1: Strives to be correct and right, wants to be precise in what they do

3: Represses softer emotions to keep up a certain image, thrives with work/passions so they can be the best at what they do

5: Detached from feelings to remain logical and objective, knowledge seeking

- Hornevian Triads -

Relationships with others, how they get what they want

Assertive (3, 7, 8)

Assertive types go against people to get what they want. Do not back down easily, can seem aggressive and forceful.

3: Pushes through obstacles for achievements, goal oriented

7: Asserts their right to have fun, refuse to be restricted

8: Asserts power and strength, places boundaries

Withdrawn (4, 5, 9)

Withdrawn types are very internalized and do not show their needs openly. Deals with things alone.

4: Feels something is wrong with them internally, feels misunderstood

5: Detached from others as to not drain their own energy, will figure it out themselves

9: Introspective, lets life happen

Compliant (1, 2, 6)

Compliant work with people to get what they want. Builds relationships for security, wants to be helpful to others.

1: Doing the right thing instead of one's own wants

2: Focus on other's needs more instead of self

6: Tries to build a safe and secure environment by getting ppl to work together

- Object Relations -

How we are affected by others, our own affect on others, how we react to personal wounds

Attachment (3, 6, 9)

Seek out bonds and companionships for particular reasons. Individuality vs adaptation.

3: Changes their image to suit whoever they are with in order to meet expectations

6: Creates support systems to help with their self doubt and indecisiveness

9: Adapts to the energy of the environment to keep harmony

Frustration (1, 4, 7)

Triad gets frustrated when their needs aren't met.

1: Has a need to improve every little imperfection they find

4: Dislikes shallowness, longs for depth and complexity

7: Not enjoying experiences, not feeling fulfilled

Rejection (2, 5, 8)

Their own needs feel unimportant to others, so they reject their own needs as well.

2: Rejects the need to receive love and guidance, instead focuses on connecting with others and helping them.

5: Ignores and minimizes all their needs, offers knowledge and expertise in some hope of being acknowledged for their intelligence.

8: Rejects by being never putting their guard down, wanting to appear strong and as the protector of others.

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Subtypes

Claudio Naranjo theory

There are three subtypes/instinctual variants that show our drive in life. There are 27 different subtypes in total.

Self Preservation (Sp)

Focuses on physical safety and security. Our physical health, financial security, obligations, and comforts.

Sexual/One - on - one (Sx)

Wants intensity and deep connections, one on one relationships are preferred.

Social (So)

Prefers to be in a community, wants to create good connections and bonds with others. Socially aware, focus on group goals and contributions.

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Tritype

Katherine Fauvre theory

A minor but still interesting piece of Enneagram. Tritype is formed of your 3 dominant types from each center. The first number will always be your core, followed by your other 2 dominant types.

E.g 369. 3 = core, heart. 6 = head. 9 = gut.

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Enneagram notes

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Side blog:

Kpop astrology @rainy-astrology

Kpop fanarts @rainy-artworks

[fairycosmos]

my ex girlfriend died a month ago. i've always found a lot of peace and recognition in what you've written about your grief but especially now, losing someone so young and who's bound to you in a different way than anyone else you've lost has been hits different and i get that now. she was 24. sending you lots of love and know that your presence on here has brightened my current darkness

i'm so so sorry to hear this. the one thought i consistently have about grief is that there are no adequate words to describe or comfort it, but still, i'm so sorry. i know exactly how unbearable it is, especially when it's still all so extremely raw and fresh. you just have no clue how you're going to get through it, and honestly you don't have to. focus on getting through minute by minute. this must be so awful for you and everyone who knew her - 24 is really no age at all. you're right, it's a very specific type of mourning. it's the hardest thing in the entire fucking world honestly. nothing really helps but if you can talk about it - whether it's with a friend, a grief counsellor, whoever - or write about it, then that sometimes enables you to process things a little more clearly. and with a smaller sense of loneliness. i sincerely hope you have good people around you who can help you through this, and that with time you're able to come up with small ways to honour her memory and keep her presence alive. at the moment i'm working on trying to find more ways to keep my sister around - like dedicating a plaque on a bench to her, and trying not to numb myself to the memories i have with her. which is hard, because it's so difficult to remember her. but i'm trying to keep her here and let her be felt everywhere, and i hope you find your version of that too. your ex was incredibly lucky to have been loved by you and you by her, and i'm glad you got to experience that, even if the inverse of that love is this. if you'd like to talk about her or discuss some of your favourite memories with her when you're ready, or even just talk about something entirely unrelated to the grief/her, please drop me a message any time. i'm glad me being open about my own grief has allowed you to find some sense of recognition and catharsis. i'm going to leave some resources for you to come back to as far as daily coping mechanisms go - they may be useful, they may not be, god knows they're certainly not a cure to the immensity of what you're going through - but they'll be there for you if you ever feel like you're truly at your wits end. sending so so much love back your way. i will be thinking of you and your ex girlfriend and keeping you both in my heart. x

bereavement and grief self-help guide / coping with grief and loss pdf / coping with grief pdf / healthy vs unhealthy coping mechanisms for grief / strategies to cope with grief / death is nothing at all by henry scott holland (a poem i come back to)

[yurnu]

I agree with you on the whole guitarhero vs adamsapple thing,

Rich and unhealthy devil's food cake is great and all but you can't really enjoy all the time,

Angel's food cake, on the other hand, is lighter and is more often than not, healthier. And sometimes, something healthier really hit the spot

||🔱🪹 Chimera! Adam AU🪹🔱||

I am a simple girl with a chicken heart. If I see a nice and healthy ship I take it and turn it into my hyperfixation.

[blueopinions49]

The SX3 dilemma

Meg March ESFJ 3w2 sx/so (From Little Woman)

Intro

Hello there! im sorry for not posting much I've been having a bit of hard time this semester with graduation and school admissions. Thats why my posting hasn't been consistent at all. However, im gonna try and at least finish the healthy/unhealthy enneagram series. Im writing this post cuz I've noticed that there is a bit of misunderstanding of what is the SX3 and how we identify them. As well as some differentiation between an E2 vs E3.

What is an SX3

Sexual Three "Charisma" or "The Cheerleader"

"Sexual Threes seek to experience Essential Value through their desirability and the magnetism of their attraction displays. Sexual Threes want to be the most magnetic person in the room. They feed off of generating intrigue, mystique, and even controversy, and they aren't much concerned with being liked or pursuing practical achievements. Competition in Sexual Threes revolves around being the most attractive and having the most captivating sexual display, and they're most likely to have cultivated a striking personal flavor meant to stand apart from others. People of this type are not interested in generic beauty, so some Sexual Threes, especially performers, play with attractive yet experimental personas or go for an overtly sexy image.- (P.209 John Lukovich, The Instinctual Drives& The Enneagram)

However, while I really like this definite of SX3 id like to add that the attractiveness of the SX3 isnt necessarily physical. It can be like the materialism of the SO3 or the Humility of the SP3. The SX3 desires to find an ideal partner in which they can find success and love. The SX subtype is ALL about interpersonal connection.

How to differentiate them from other types

I think the easiest way to different two types from each other is usually through core desire and triads. most people usually confuse them due to the squishy nature the SX3 has. Imo unlike the SO3 which are usually easier to spot due to their leadership, ambition and overall way they carry themselves. The SX3 is somewhere in between the SO3 and the SP3. The SX3 MAY have the assertiveness of an 8. However, they can also have the playfulness of a 7. The timidness of a 6, the calmness of a 9 or the desire of love of the 2. Which is why I think relying on the look of the type can fall short a bit when it comes to looking for traits. So I think the more important aspects of them can be seen as:

Love+Validation+Status

I think allot of people forget that the E3 core desire is validation so they create an image (a performance if you will) to show the world.

Unlike the E2 the SX3 will NOT sacrifice their own needs in those for the partner. The 3s desire is their own and so are their ambitions. The SX3 is an idealist romantic and what doesn't fall in that image will be cut out.

NOTE: The relation to the other individual doesn't need to be romantic necessarily.

Image

yes, they are an image type BUT unlike the other two heart types the 3 has a need to attract through conventionality. Unlike the SX4 they don't pose as hurt, broken and sad individuals or the SX2 more sacrificing nature the SX3 will use "whats in" or what their target of desire likes.

Characters that are SX3

Charlotte York 3w2 sx/so

Finnick Odair 3w2 sx/so

Lestat Di Lioncourt 3w4 sx/so

Amy Dunn 3w2 sx/so

Dionne Davenport 3w2 sx/so

Johnny Storm 3w2 sx/so

Steve Harrington 3w2 sx/so

Fiona 3w2 sx/so

Sansa Stark 3w2 sx/so

Lady Dimitrescu 3w2 sx/so

Dennis Reynolds 3w2 sx/so

Emma Frost 3w4 sx/so

Ino Yamanaka 3w2 sx/so

Rosalie Hale 3w2 sx/sp

P.S This post came to mind cuz im low-key regretting making that SX3 Azula post. As well as rethinking my typing of Tomie.

[throneofsapphics]

Have Your Little Girlfriend is thoroughly breaking my heart 🤧 It's such an emotional roller-coaster, and I don't know how to handle it.

I just want to share some of my thoughts about the fic with you:

First, the mated-triad concept is so fucking messy, I love it lmao! The concept itself has so much potential for angst, and you absolutely hit the mark with every chapter you release. The way you write angst scratches that angsty itch in my brain 😆

Second, the complete lack of communication between rowaelin and the reader frustrates me to no end (in a good way, I promise). And the idea that, even if the reader were to communicate their feelings to rowaelin in a healthy way, rowaelin probably wouldn't listen anyway, makes me want to scream 😀

There's such a clear and unhealthy disconnect between rowaelin and the reader - it's very much Rowan and Aelin vs. the reader, instead of Rowan, Aelin, and the reader navigating issues together. I have read very few fics that include this dynamic written as well as you write it. I'm in absolute awe of how well you've written this fucked up relationship dynamic!

Third, and most frustratingly, ROWANS BEHAVIOR IS PISSING ME OFF. There, I said it. Every time we get a glimpse of Rowans inner thoughts and feelings, it makes me want to kick his ass. I get it, he's literally blood bound to ensure Aelin is happy, healthy, and unhurt, but, fuck, he could at least pretend to care for the reader as much as he cares for Aelin. (Because, from what I've read, it doesn't feel like Rowan cares for the reader beyond the fact that they're mated - it seems like he just feels obligated to "care" for the reader.) I swear, if I have to read Rowan thinking, "If the reader makes Aelin cry, I'm going to make their life Hell" ONE MORE FUCKING TIME I'M GOING TO REACH INTO MY PHONE AND THROTTLE THAT DUMB BIRD. Especially when Rowan and Aelin's actions in the fic have literally pushed the reader into multiple mental breakdowns. Like, what the fuck dude?!?!

ALSO. Fenrys reducing the reader to just Rowans "other mate" in this newest chapter absolutely tore me apart. Without context, it's not necessarily untrue, but with context, it just feels so derogatory and diminishing and it made me want to pull my hair out.

Anyway, sorry for the rant lol, I just felt the need to share my thoughts. You're awesome, your writing is awesome, keep up the awesome work, and please add me to the Have Your Little Girlfriend taglist 🩷

Thank you so much for sharing all of this with me! I seriously love love love it and I'll absolutely add you to the taglist.

I agree their relationship dynamic is fucked, and if everything it would take some major revamping for their relationship to work in a genuinely healthy way.

PLEASE THROTTLE HIM!!!! honestly he deserves it.

Fenrys's "other mate" comment was genuinely an accident and he doesn't really believe it, but with how reader's been feeling I imagined it as a gut punch to her, even if she knows he doesn't think it's the truth either.

Please don't apologize! I absolutely loved reading this, you're awesome and thank you so much <3

[blues-valentine]

HSMTMTS: Ricky’s story arc as told by his songs. From I Think I Kinda You Know to Love You Forever (Part 2).

I’ve been thinking about how every song Ricky has performed on the show (my focus will be mostly on the original songs) tell us what his journey has been in the course of the show.

Ricky’s journey has been about changes and the future, leaving his childhood behind, how his parents relationship affects his own as well as the ability to be emotionally open. How he viewed love at the start of the show vs how he views love now. About new starts. About how happiness is a process and something he also needs to create for himself. And his songs reflect this journey very well. For this post. I'll focus on Season 1 and Season 2 for Part 1.

Read Part 1

As a continuation to my analysis on Ricky and the songs narrating his journey on the series. I mentioned how Season 2 closes part of Ricky’s arc with Second Chance. A song that in Ricky’s side talks about moving on after a relationship ends (Nini) and finding new beginnings. He also finishes the season saying he isn’t sure of who he is yet but it’s getting towards happiness. He had understood to an extent a lot of things and how he reacted to them wasn’t healthy for himself and those people in his life. Season 3 opens a new chapter for Ricky to start again but as an improved version of himself. It is his “second chance” in all capacities, which is why I said (x) Season 3 feels like a new start and by putting Ricky in similar situations but having him deal with it differently will show how much he has grown from his past mistakes and fears.

And before we start we have to mention the Lily story line. I think it was clearly a plot device to get to some realization. Ricky thought Lily was a good person that just needed some friends. And he saw an opportunity for something new. But the storyline simply fell flat and it made it seem like an useless rebound instead of giving Ricky (and the audience) a satisfactory arc. She was a copy of Gina 1.0 and I believe Ricky was trying to see Gina in her, and a lot of their parallels (x) feel intentional. And we know by now nothing about Rina is done carelessly. I remember Tim Federle’s interview for the finale saying Ricky is sometimes too naive for his own good. And I am sure the story line was going to make sense but as confirmed by Tim himself a lot of the things in Season 2 were rushed and the finale was rewritten (it was originally going to feature a lot of flashbacks) but the safety precautions due to covid changed those plans. Regardless, I am glad that arc got removed. Lily wasn’t an interesting character and I didn’t want her to take space from other characters. Now, with that out of the way, let’s move on.

Ricky opens this season as well as being given the first song of the season: Finally Free. This song really expands on Second Chance and tell us where Ricky’s mindset is before going to camp: embracing new starts, not going back to the old ways he used to handle all his feelings.

Some important parts: “Give me empty pages, just give me something new” Season 1 Ricky would’ve never wished for something like this. “Breakin' away from the broken hearts (Nini). No more mistakes, no more empty starts (Lily). I'm finally, finally free, finally, finally”. He follows with “Buildin' out from the bottom. Now there's no way to go but up” meaning he has to rebuild himself again. And another one that is important is: “And I'm going down a road that I don’t know. Yeah, I let it take me anywhere but home”. This takes us back to him calling Nini home (at his childhood home) on Season 2 in a matter that felt like attachment to his childhood (and old times) so this references him not going back to that unhealthy mindset.

In a way, all the events that happened lead for Ricky to have this realization. This is the Ricky that could’ve been ready to be with Gina. But Season 1 and Season 2 Ricky wasn’t ready for that and was denying it, when he allows himself to not be afraid of changes, his feelings take a whole new perspective. This is why he is able to understand his feelings for Gina were always deeper than he allowed himself to admit before. And very fitting with the theme, Ricky and Gina vow to just “start over” with their relationship. This season is not just about Ricky rebuilding himself but his relationship with Gina as well.

This season doesn’t have as many solo songs due to the limited episodes, but did a good job in paralleling the overall arc with the roles they were playing for the musical, especially with the “love triangle” (x). Gina represents Anna’s naive perspective on love due to EJ being her first relationship so a lot of her interactions with him felt very rose colored and passive (x). I did said before EJ isn’t exactly Hans but they drew a lot of intentional parallels between them, such as Gina not knowing EJ’s real name (and that line being in the WDYKAL duet about Hans). Ricky representing Kristoff in a way that he is also learning a new way to love someone. Plus, them having Gina and EJ dress like the actual characters in a dream like sequence was very much in the nose about those references.

In this season, Ricky is starting to discover the intensity of his feelings for Gina but he handles it very differently from Season 1. He isn’t trying to cross lines but remaining respectful of her relationship with EJ. I already spoke about how this is an intentional contrast to showcase Ricky’s growth (x). From trying to help both of them, from apologizing to Gina when he feels like his feelings might’ve been too obvious. To selflessly be there for Gina, because he is now discovering love isn’t selfish or has some gain. Love is about sacrifice, sometimes putting the person you love first despite what might come.

Now, here it comes Ricky and Gina’s first duet: What Do You Know About Love. It seems fitting for them because in a way, it reflects how they perceive love at that moment. In the song Anna has a very rose colored perception of love. She thinks it’s worth it even when they clearly aren’t on the same page and she’s idealizing it, and for Kristoff, love isn’t easy, and it requieres a lot of commitment. Ricky and Gina’s version is a lot more flirtier than the Broadway version, but the question “what do you know about love?” is what they ultimately learn from each other.

In the following episodes, Ricky helps Gina plan her promposal to EJ, despite his own feelings. I saw someone saying that a lot of Gina’s season 2 heartbreak was about thinking it was never going to be between her and Ricky. And a lot of Ricky’s heartbreak on Season 3 comes from regret, from letting Gina walk away, from letting something great slip through his fingers. At this point, he can’t turn back time but it’s willing to be there for her in any capacity Gina allows him to be. In the 60’s prom episode, Ricky could’ve told her what he feels for her but realized that it would be selfish to do this to Gina when she’s harboring her own heartbreak. His own growth has been great to watch throughout Season 3.

I also love how Ricky’s sub-plot involving the bucket list he wrote when he was a child of things to do before turning 18 is a metaphor to leaving his childhood and entering adulthood. I already spoke (x) how Nini being the person to help him complete his very last item represents how Nini was his childhood and him only ever getting with Gina when that transition has been done is very important for him as a character.

And this isn’t a Ricky solo, but I just love how this moment and this lyrics are used exactly for this scene because this is the moment Gina realizes it’s always going to be Ricky and what also makes her realize that she isn’t getting the love she deserves or wants for herself with EJ.

As all of us theorized, with WDYKAL, Ricky was going to sing “Kristoff’s Lullaby” because is a direct response to the duet. And he did. This is probably his most important solo song from the season because it puts into words what he feels for Gina and how much she has changed what he thinks about love. I’ve explained this before. (x) Gina has represented change from the very moment she came in (and she was described as such multiple times). She was new, different, and represented the changes Ricky was afraid of. But what they didn’t know is that they are able to give each other what the other needs. Gina made him put into perceptive the idea that he can move forward, that he can deal with his life falling into different directions. Gina has made him understand that he can and will be ready for when changes knock at his door because loving her isn’t about holding back.

Important parts from the song are: “You light the world for me. You live life fearlessly, braver than the bravest of us do. You trust, you hope, you dare. You choose to feel and care. I thought that I was strong 'til I bumped into you” I think this is the perfect way to describe Gina’s effect on Ricky’s life and how brave Gina has been about her feelings for Ricky despite her fear about forming attachments. And I’ve always said “Everything I thought I did. You've gone and changed it, kid. You're what I know about love.” is really the climax of the song and by Ricky singing this directly to Gina (while Nini is also on the audience) is makes a full circle. (x)

This season, Ricky learned to love theater and commit to it, not just because he enjoys it but because he wanted Gina to shine. He created a good friendship with the group, as opposed to Season 2, where he was disconnected to the drama club he now has his own space within. He called himself “a theater guy” and was able to guide Jet towards it. He knew Jet had to find a place to help him cope with his home life and Ricky’s arc comes to a sweet full circle for this.

Ricky ends the season in such a good place. He has grown a lot and allowed things to just be. I like the fact he remained respectful of Gina, even when his feelings were quiet obvious. And I spoke about how important it is that their relationship started by Gina setting her own boundaries. She needed to set the lines and be like “I have feelings for you but I am also okay if it doesn’t happen between us” because a lot of Gina’s journey on Season 3 was about coming into herself and discovering her expectations in a relationship. Her telling him what she feels for him but not allowing it to weight her down and it being a parallel to 206 was also intentional. It was also important for Ricky. He needed that reassurance and initiative to finally give it his all. As he proves on Season 4, he knows and now learned his lesson. He is committed to not mess things up with her. He is committed to improve.

Season 3 ends with Ricky and Gina’s right time. Both on the same page. It was important for them to experience all of that individual journey to get together in a romantic relationship that can be fulfilling and healthy for them both.

Season 4 starts the season with Ricky and Gina in a very happy relationship. You can see that Ricky is motivated to share things with her and do things for them as a couple. A lot of Ricky and Gina’s relationship works because they embrace each other’s personalities and love languages. Gina encourages and reciprocates Ricky’s dorky behavior. As I said, she doesn’t feel suffocated by it like Nini (x) but she wants that level of commitemment and gestures.

At the start of the season, Ricky and Gina are keeping their relationship a secret because Gina is worried about the negative comments from people (mostly her mom) and she doesn’t want the bubble they’ve built together to crash. It’s understandable that we know how controlling her mom is. Ricky agrees despite his own fears. In the first episodes, we can see that a lot is changing for Gina in a way that might take her away from Ricky. This is an opportunity for him to be tested by old insecurities but make it right and not going back to his old tendencies. So, instead of trying to hold Gina back and wishing for the opportunities to disappear, he is happy, encouraging and supportive despite the odds. This thing is reflected in their very first original duet and song of the season: Maybe This Time.

It’s a song about hoping this is the right time for them to get it right after all of the missed opportunities between them and their old relationships. They’re finally in a place where they can be together but as foreshadowing for the season a lot of things are going to change and threaten the stable place they’ve created. But not matter what the future holds they promise to be together and enjoy the ride instead of trying to control the uncertain future.

Part of the lyrics: “Maybe this time is all that we get but we've still got lots to figure out. I’d love to control what happens next I'll give you my all right now. Don't look back, just pull me closer. Hands up on this rollercoaster”. I explained (x) but having Ricky and Gina deal with similar experiences in their past relationships is to not just show how much they’ve grown and learned but also to show how committed they are to be together and be with each other as a team.

In 403, Ricky experiences a bit of insecurities over Mack but despite that he prepares a date with Gina and also apologizes for the comment he made where he sort of dismissed the impact Mack’s show had on Gina’s childhood. It might have been silly but I think it shows Ricky’s self awareness and that he takes seriously all of the things that make Gina happy. In the following episodes, Ricky tries to be supportive of Gina’s life changing opportunities and trying to find a way to make it easier for her to handle both the musical and the movie, but it starts getting a bit too overwhelming and when he finds out Gina hasn’t told her mom about them, it awakens his insecurities. This is where Speak Out comes. Although it is supposed to be for EJ to also speak about his fears, it’s about how Ricky hasn’t said some things out loud, how his mom abandonment issues have created a lot of fears into his life and has made him feel like he isn’t enough of a reason for someone to stay.

Part of the lyrics are: “I'm so sick of my past breakin' me like glass shackled by my emotion.” (…) “Don't wanna walk away from this. Don't wanna be a sinkin' ship. The anchor on my tongue won't let me swim. Don't wanna waste a moment more. Don't know what I've been waitin' for. I'll never get a chance like this again.”

I think this moment was an outlet for Ricky to speak about things that are the root of his insecurities. How his mom decided she wanted a new life in a new city and left Ricky. How Nini didn’t think Ricky was enough for her and even how emotionally difficult it must’ve been for him to hear The Rose song and how Ricky’s entire attempts makes her feel trapped. The reason Ricky was running away is because he thought Gina was also going to leave him for bigger and better things and didn’t want to anticipate it. He never thought he is enough of a reason to stay because frankly, no one had really taken Ricky seriously or believed in his potential, except for Miss Jenn and Gina.

After that much needed conversation with EJ, Ricky goes to see Gina only to see her with Mack. I feel like in Ricky’s mind, he feels like she decided and he’s nothing compared to him. Luckily, Gina sees him and runs after him and tells him she has told his mom about them. I feel like people don’t understand that since a lot of Ricky’s fears have to do with him feeling like he isn’t good enough to be a secure option he doesn’t except people to actually chose him. In his relationship with Gina, he puts efforts but so does Gina for him. She wants him in her life and in her dreams. He isn’t an obstacle or stops her from achieving those dreams, he’s always been a motivation for Gina to pursue them.

In the last episodes, there’s still so many things Ricky has to address, not just about Gina but his college plans and their future. At this point, he has convinced himself that Gina most likely will go to chase her dreams and that it doesn’t involve him. He learned his lesson before, he told Nini he wanted her to stay only for that to be reasonably met with distaste. But the thing is, all of Ricky’s gestures where always meant to be received by Gina, who wants to be asked to stay. I explained this before. Had Ricky asked Gina to stay, she would have done it. But I love how she didn’t have to chose between her need for stability and her wants to be successful.

407 is great at paralleling Troy and Gabriela’s dilemma with Ricky and Gina’s very own issues. “Scream” comes at the moment Ricky is torn between letting Gina go and his unclear future. He feels time is running out. Later, we have them singing Right Here Right Now, a song about how the future is coming soon and they should make every second last. In a way, it also parallels Maybe This Time but less hopeful.

And as an expectacular full circle moment, Ricky says in his speech how thankful he is about the drama club changing his life and getting him through a hard situation. As of Season 1, Ricky came in being a cynical skate rat that didn’t seem to have many friends and was pessimist about love. It didn’t seem like he had hobbies or prospects outside of skating. He had a very troubling home life and dealing with a lot of anxiety. His relationship with Nini was in the verge of ending like his parents relationship and so were his last remainders of childhood. He had to let go of things that were holding him back and accepting of changes and by the end of Season 4 we have seen Ricky become a man in so many ways. He basically let his childhood go by the end of Season 3. And this final season was about him asking questions about his own future and how that would look like for him.

And we are finally here with “Love You, Forever”. The last song Ricky Bowen ever sings on the show and how perfect of a full circle moment it is for his growth. It starts and it ends in the same place: the auditorium. Just in very different situations and a whole new Ricky.

He starts Season 1 singing “I Think I Kinda You Know” to Nini but being unable to say I love you to her face or in front of people. Mostly because his own insecurities involving his parents and how he wasn’t secure enough. I also said that when he finally did say I love you, it was still swimming in his fears of attachment and his parents divorce. It was a confession that felt like desperation to hold onto something steady and safe. And he does say this with “not net, not fear, right here in this moment”. But now, Ricky sings Love You Forever to Gina, and this time very clearly saying the words “I am in love” and “I love you” to her face and in front of his friends (and the world). He say it because he not longer associates love with something scary and that’s also thanks to Gina. He isn’t saying it to Gina to make her stay either. He is saying it because he feels it. He doesn’t know what the future holds (at that point he didn’t even know Gina changed the movie location to SLC) but he loves her and he isn’t afraid of saying it despite the unknown circumstances.

The lyrics says it all: “I been wishin' on a fallin' star for too long. I been runnin', I don't know what from but you and I've become a sacred kinda home. I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love and I know it. No net, no fear right here in this moment. I've never been more sure of what I got, yeah. Cause this is so much more than puppy love, so. I'll say it first, no matter what the cost. Here I am, full heart, full stop. I love you” and one important lyric that didn’t make it to the show but is in the full version: “I never knew that I could feel so sure and so strong how can three old words feel so brand new? Ooh, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love and I know it. Mm, so rare, so real right here in this moment. I've never been more sure of what I got. And I'm starin' at the only thing I want, so” because as I said, it’s not just about him saying I love you to Gina and being sure about it but to tell his parents and his friends. Gina’s love has made Ricky so much more emotionally open.

I would describe Ricky’s journey like this:

Season 1: Attachement, fear of changes and sticking to the status quo. Season 2: Denial, isolation, reconning and letting go. Season 3: embracing new beginnings, self improvement and passage to adulthood. Season 4: Growing, learning and embracing the future.

Ricky’s arc has always been incredible because it’s something that took time and effort. Ricky’s arc wasn’t a 180 of one season, it came with ups and downs until he finally managed to do it right not just for himself but for those he loves.

[thyofthee]

Remember kids, many companies who are trying to ‘help’ with the obesity epidemic are payed off by major sugar companies; such as Nestle, Hershey, Mars, General Mills, etc; to say that lipid-fatty foods are the ones causing the epidemic.

While just like anything a heavy amount of fatty foods is not good for you, simple sugars that are pumped into the foods and drinks meant for people and especially children, are way worse for people.

The idea that a diet should contain more Carbs than proteins, dairies, and fats is what causes mass obesity especially within children, tooth decay, gum decay, strokes and chronic heart conditions.

A healthy diet is mainly protein, vegetables, fruits, with limited carbs. There’s a reason once humans started mass farming of rice, wheat, and rye we also saw all these conditions appear.

This isn’t just American consumerism, this is world wide. Even if people talk about how Europe doesn’t have as much sugar in their foods, candy and chocolate companies dominate.

And by allowing these companies to continue, we see an increase of human rights abuses (especially Nestle in Africa) and monopolization.

Nestle is trying to monopolize water, stealing it from reservoirs from Africa and selling it back to the people at extreme mark ups. They’re distilling of this water is leaving these countries with no other option than to by or drink contaminated water.

Coca-Cola is Mexico while yes does not use corn-syrup (one of the most unhealthy inventions by mankind) still holds a monopoly over entire Mexican states. They take the water for their bottling plants leaving people to have to buy Coca-Cola as a way to not die of thirst. This is why Mexico has some of the highest tooth decay rates and childhood obesity rates in the world.

And if you’re the type of person to blame this on GMO’s you don’t know what you’re talking about. All human agriculture is genetically modified that’s how we have most fruits especially citrus plants. But we have grown these plants to have an exuberant increase in sugar to the point that zoos have to stop giving things like apples and bananas to their animals because they’re getting cavities and dying of obesity related heart conditions.

The reason nobody does anything about this is because sugar companies are the biggest companies in the world. They use fake rivalries (such as Pepsi Co. Vs Coca-Cola, Hershey Vs Mars, etc) to make you buy more products and fuel them. Almost all companies are owned by these major brands.

[starryeyed-spacegirl]

Beauty as Types of Daylight:

The Pale Dawn:

Quiet, gentle, and peaceful; her pace is slow and steady; her light is a pale glow that grows - you must take the time to sit with her to fully appreciate her beauty; isn’t very active on social media; tentative, like a deer- easy to startle and anxious; a worrier; she sits like patience on a monument; often approaches silent and unnoticed; takes the time to appreciate the little things in life; her pace is slow, and is often perceived as a person who lacks ambition (but remember the hare vs. the tortoise); often appears indecisive while in groups; hates being the center of attention; gives off a glow that permeates the air with peace and comfort; rarely asks for attention; content to live her life without reference to anyone; when comfortable, reveals a colorful personality and wonderful sense of humor; whimsical and charming; prefers to mind her own business; under the radar; has a specific morning ritual; doesn’t like to rush; in tune with nature; has her comfort person, and reveals herself exclusively to this person; talks softly; tries not to take up space (has a hard time accepting that she is allowed to take up space); appears withdrawn but is simply careful with how she spends her energy; surprisingly independent; in her mind exists a deep well of thoughts (which she rarely shares with the class); doesn’t like loud music; hates arguments and will do anything to stop them — including stuffing her own wants and needs; constantly seeking a harmonious environment; is tired out easily by people; retreats when stressed, anxious, or fatigued; easily becomes melancholy; careful and methodical; deceptively easy going; genuinely happy to go with the group; prone to passive aggressive behavior; secretly stubborn; when unhealthy: takes things too personally and makes people walk on eggshells; when healthy: extremely understanding and thinks the best of people; is the most loyal and understanding companion you could ask for; lives in the shades of grey; a soft, warm soul; appears delicate but is strong in spirit; love language: time spent.

Vibes: fairy circles in a meadow in the forest; Wes Anderson films; Hayao Miyazaki, Victorian England; Class: Druid; reading at a quiet coffee shop on the coast; barefoot in a field of flowers; cats curled up in a patch of sunlight

Colors: pastels: mossy green, butter yellow, robin’s egg blue; earth tones

Personality Profiles: Arwen; Hobbits; Elves; element: water; Anne (Persuasion); Master Yoda; Cinderella; Snow White; Hufflepuff; Type 6 and 9; Professor Lupin

Songs: “Kristofferson’s Theme” by Alexandre Desplat; “As Needed” by Beirut

Noonday Sun:

bright, bold, and strong; unflinching and unapologetic in her approach to life; her energy polarizes others like a magnetic force; Powerful: a bulldozer when unhealthy, or a fierce protector when healthy; she has no time for your bullshit; she is who she is; mood swings; loves hard; can be perceived as blunt or harsh: there are no blurred lines, only light and shadow, love and hate; tells things like she sees them, with little to no filter; volume control problems; tends not to catch subtle signals/ appear oblivious to certain social rules; enjoys life to its fullest; excellent at self care; will ignore you if she thinks you’re stupid and your opinions suck; cares about honor, chivalry, and justice; not afraid to make a mess; will break a few eggs to make the omelette; would rather learn first hand by making her own mistakes; jaded by life’s unfairness; a romantic at heart; easily overcome by her feelings, and cannot NOT express them with the same level of emotion she feels; interprets things more literally; unique and stylistic in her view of life; may have difficulty coming to terms with her power/ others have difficulty coming to terms with her power; if you abuse her trust, she’ll never forgive or forget; seeks (and often struggles) to find her own unique path in life; often misunderstood and mistreated; leader of procrastination nation; will invade your space; will take up space, no apologies; her sarcasm often comes off as serious; has savage burns; once you earn her loyalty, she will burn the world down for you; hates fads (is low key hipster, though she hates that too); drowns her feelings of they feel too big; either looks pulled together or pulled apart; will fight like a bulldog for what she believes in; blazing eyes and stubborn chin; hyper fixator; stubborn; she is valuable and loved because of her strength - she is also often pushed away because of it; Loves big; A feeler; vibe checker; love language: physical touch.

Vibes: Medieval times; Arcane (League of Legends); Vikings; the 1980-1990s; Class: barbarian; thunderstorms; late night drives to the beach, windows down music blaring; doc martens

Colors: CMYK

Personality profile: element: fire; Gryffindor; Type 4 and 8; Thor Odinson and Valkyrie; Anakin Skywalker; B’Elanna Torres; Mandalorians; Sirius Black; Ginny Weasley

Songs: “Middle Finger” by Bohnes; “Seize the Power” by YONAKA

Golden Hour:

Soothing, warm, supportive; she knows how to make people feel good about themselves; cares about people and wants them to feel seen and heard; a great listener; popular and friendly; prefers to shine the spotlight as opposed to being in spotlight; supportive of dreams and ideas; often runs out of energy for her own problems because she’s too busy worrying about everyone else’s problems; despises exclusivity- everybody should be included; toxic trait: claims she doesn’t need the credit for her hard work, but becomes resentful if her work is not acknowledged; supportive; when healthy: wise and balanced; when unhealthy: self important and self righteous; understands people/ compassionate; has a hard time being vulnerable; hates being seen as inept/ careful not to make any missteps; feels selfish if she talks about herself for too long; thinks self care means only doing productive things; had difficulty setting boundaries; love language: acts of service; sees the world as a mission field; dry, quick wit; savior complex; excellent at noticing the little things about people that are often overlooked; attention to detail; often thinks her way is the best way; grounded and stable; easy going confidence; prefers a supportive role as opposed to a lead; hard on herself; perfectionist- and often projects that onto others while under stress; has an obsession with how she’s being perceived; she glows with a light that gilts all she touches in gold; struggles with wanting to control everything; committed to a strong belief system; isn’t interested in the theoretical; a servant leader; has trouble sitting still to enjoy the present; thinks she has to do things in order to be worthy of love and attention; the biggest heart you’ll ever see; quick to laugh and smile

Vibes: Joshua Tree at sunset; the Renaissance; The Way, Way Back (film); sunshine breaking through the trees; the afterglow of a core memory being made; a protective hug;

Colors: jewel tones

Personality profile: Phil Coulson; Pepper Potts; Obi Wan Kenobi; class: Paladin; element: earth; Type 1 and 2; The Jedi Order; Captain Janeway; the mom friend; Mon Mothma; Dumbledore;

Songs: “A place Only You Can Go” by NEEDTOBREATHE; “Roslyn” by Bon Iver

[limeade-l3sbian]

i know this question is kind of odd probably but i’m curious since it’s a sentiment i’ve seen shared a lot in more progressive spaces and something i degree with on most sides.

before i begin i want to say i’m very fat, as in clinically highly obese. i have not always been so and so i have seen the obvious change in the treatment i receive due to my current fat body vs my past skinny one. i know there’s intense fatphobia within society and within most people to unpack. this is not the place what i’m saying comes from.

however, i’ve seen a lot say the desire to lose weight, not even to be skinny/thin, but simply to want to reach a healthy weight, is fatphobic in itself. and this is something i highly disagree with. i’m not trying to speak for every fat person. but speaking for myself it genuinely sucks to be fat. even taking all the societal stuff away, the discrimination in public and healthcare, it’s not fun to be in such a heavy body. you sweat more. you chafe. your body builds up bacteria/smells easier bc of the rolls trapping sweat. it’s harder to move overall. i’m not a very tall woman and yet i weigh more than a 190cm tall, buff man. the bigger the body, the larger the appetite, so even as i’m losing weight, the cravings for massive amounts of food is hard to get past. the sore, massive and permanent stretch marks everywhere. the sped up aging as i’m losing weight, despite being young. i could go on. then there’s the fact that even if i do manage to lose enough weight to reach a more average size for my height and built, my brain will now forever fight to make me gain weight bc it does not get that me losing weight was for my health and fear of dying of heart disease or other. it will simply see me losing weight as starvation, despite not actually starving, and scream danger and do everything to keep anything i eat, increase my appetite, even shedding muscle to keep fat. it will be a constant battle from now on. there’s a reason obesity is seen as a chronic health issue bc even if your weight isn’t categorised as obese anymore, your body still works like one, still wants that body back - it doesn’t understand why you wanted to lose that weight.

i’ve had a painfully thin mom my whole life, i don’t see skinniness as a necessary sign of health. hell, i even know most bodies can technically live longer with extreme obesity than extreme thinness/under eating. but me wanting to reach a more average weight, me wanting to lose weight and train and become more fit is genuinely seen as a fatphobic mindset to many within some spaces.

my question to you, what’s your opinion on all this?

No, wanting to lose weight and wanting to be healthier is not fatphobic and if anyone gives you shit for that, then they're an idiot. it is not "diet culture" to want to be healthy. I dislike this notion so much because it really warps the thinking around weight loss and weight retention.

I think if you told me that you would not feel beautiful until you were your mom's weight, that wouldn't even be some form of internalized "fatphobia" since to assume that any physical change will equate to immediate happiness is unhealthy. I have been chunky my whole life and for each doctor visit I've gone to, they have never insinuated that the extra pounds were negatively affecting me. It was just...a thing. "The sky is blue and you're ___lbs overweight. Anyway..." But I still want(ed) to lose weight for the reasons you listed. I'm not crazy about the chafing, I love to thrift shop and I want to have more options, and I didn't like being out of breath so quickly. I've also been dreaming about having strong ass arms lately. Like, a lot lol.

Do you, anon. There is nothing wrong with wanting to get healthy.

[marcomarconii]

👀Must Know: Nutrition Tips and Tricks 🥗🍽️

📌 Today, we're into must-know nutrition tips and tricks. Good nutrition is the base of a healthy life! Let's get into how you can make the most of your diet. ⬇️

1️⃣ Tip 1: Include Whole Foods

Whole foods like fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins are full of nutrients. Unprocessed foods give you the vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants your body needs to function correctly. Eating whole foods reduces your intake of added sugars, unhealthy fats, and preservatives. Whole foods are naturally lower in calories and higher in fiber, which helps you maintain a healthy weight and digestive health.

2️⃣ Tip 2: Understand Macronutrients

Balance your macronutrients: carbohydrates, proteins, and fats. Carbs give you energy, proteins support muscle repair and growth, healthy fats support hormone production and brain health. Aim for a balanced plate at every meal. Carbs should come from whole grains, fruits, and veggies. Choose lean proteins like chicken, fish, beans, and legumes. Incorporate healthy fats from nuts, seeds, and avocados. This balance gives you sustained energy and overall health.

3️⃣ Tip 3: Incorporate Micronutrients

Micronutrients like vitamins and minerals are important for many bodily functions. Make sure you have a diverse diet to get a variety of micronutrients. Leafy greens, nuts, seeds, and colorful fruits are excellent sources. Vitamin C from citrus fruits supports the immune system, calcium from dairy products strengthens bones, and iron from spinach and lentils prevents anemia. A varied diet covers all your nutritional bases.

4️⃣ Tip 4: Hydrate

Stay hydrated! Water is for digestion, nutrient absorption, and toxin elimination. Aim for at least 8 glasses of water a day. You can also include herbal teas and water-rich fruits like watermelon and cucumber. Hydration is good for skin, weight management, and physical performance. Carry a water bottle with you and stay hydrated throughout the day. Listen to your body and drink when you're thirsty.

5️⃣ Tip 5: Fiber is Your Best Friend

Fiber is for digestion, weight management, and chronic disease prevention. Incorporate soluble and insoluble fiber from oats, beans, fruits, and veggies. Soluble fiber from oats and beans helps control blood sugar and lower cholesterol. Insoluble fiber from whole grains and veggies helps with bowel regularity. A fiber-rich diet is good for your gut microbiome.

6️⃣ Tip 6: Limit Processed Foods

Processed foods contain unhealthy fats, sugars, and sodium, which can lead to obesity, heart disease, and diabetes. Opt for whole, natural foods whenever possible. Cooking at home allows you to control the ingredients and avoid additives. Read food labels to make informed choices. Reducing processed food intake means better long-term health outcomes.

7️⃣ Tip 7: Eat Mindfully

Be mindful by paying attention to your hunger and fullness cues; eat slowly and savor each bite. This helps with digestion and prevents overeating. Mindful eating enables you to enjoy your food more and recognize true hunger vs emotional eating. It helps you make healthier food choices and the eating experience. Put away distractions and focus on your meal.

8️⃣ Tip 8: Plan and Prep

Meal planning and prepping help you eat balanced. Set aside time each week to plan your meals, grocery shop, and prep ingredients. This saves time and ensures you have healthy options available. Planning reduces the temptation to grab unhealthy convenience foods. Batch cooking and storing meals make busy days easier and consistent healthy eating. Make a grocery list to avoid impulse buys.

➡️ These tips will make a big impact. Remember, consistency is key. Small changes add up over time.

📌 P.S. For more nutrition tips and tricks, consider joining my newsletter. 📬📬 https://marcomarconii.ck.page/18360dce95

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

I see u sometimes reblog stranger things stuff, was wondering if you can share some opinions on it? Any strong opinions on the mileven vs byler war

Lol I knew somehow when I put on my Stranger Things sweatshirt today that I would get this ask lol. Super fun question, thanks for asking! I love talking about any of my other fandoms. I've been pretty involved in the Stranger Things fandom from the jump, I liveblog every new season which you guys do not have to worry about for a while but you can totally backread my ST tags (melissa liveblogs st and melissa on stranger things) for my content or feel free to blacklist if you don't want to see it. I was also active in a few discords for Stranger Things and It, so if you were in any of those you might've seen me around. Met some great people, a few of which are still active on here @sorenserotonin and @milfnightshade loyal mutuals 🫡 who I always appreciate. I'll tag them in case they feel like returning to discussing Stranger Things with me like old times lol.

As for byler and mileven, I don't have super strong opinions. The two mutuals I tagged are both byler shippers (actually I forget if Deidre is, I'm pretty sure). EDIT: DEIDRE IS NOT! I personally have always been into mileven, they were the heart of the first season to me in a way that's really unmatched. The following seasons they have had their really moving moments, particularly for me the third season, but never the same spark as that first season. I do think they are endgame though, because that's just the path the show is on. I don't think the narrative makes sense without them, and wether that is effective writing is a whole separate post. That being said, I will always always never have beef with an lgbtq ship in any fandom, unless it's with a very unhealthy character and I think the ship is straight up abusive. Fandom is a largely queer space because we create the content we lack. That's important and should be respected regardless of ship wars (and I'm a person that gets into those lol). I have a dear friend who will ship anything as long as it's two women, even if they never interacted. I've never understood this. I want the writing to be strong and the relationship to be healthy. But I understand why she feels the way she feels and I'd never judge her, that's what fandom is for.

Some other Stranger Things opinions; I think the writing really has suffered since the first season. It is still a great show, but they struggle with consistency in their characters which is a huge issue for me. They also cave to fandom, which is another huge pet peeve of mine.

I also think Billy Hargrove is one of the most damaging popular characters in a long time, in terms of fandom and the impact on culture. I might just be biased however, I'm on some Billy fans blocklists.

This season was the best one by far since the first. I know that's a hot take, but I think it's true.

Max and Lucas were the only characters who were effectively developed and utilized this past season, which was a breath of fresh air for them to not waste Caleb McLaughlin again.

I do not like Jonathan Byers, but that being said the time for stancy has long come and gone and returning to it is insane.

Oh, final take, we've been giving the Duffers far too much credit for Robin as a character when a lot of it should go to fav nepotism baby Maya Hawke.