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danisdistant · 1 year ago

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sunday - your past sins are meaningless now - part one

[intro blog] | [taglist] | [masterlist] | [table of contents]

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sunday x stellaronhunter!reader

although it was only three days, it felt almost eternal when you’re locked up in a dark room. it doesn’t help that hunger has been gnawing away inside his body.

jade had been checking up on him periodically from time to time to remind him that her offer still stands. even hours before the trial was in preparation, she gave him one last chance. granted, her patience was growing thin.

“are you really going to die like this, sunday?” she said, walking up to him as she lifted his chin. he was already pale-skinned, but even in the dark she could tell he was almost as white as a ghost.

even with this confrontation, sunday refused to maintain eye contact with her. “i’ve told you, for the past three days. i do not want your pity.”

“…well then.” jade sighed, releasing his chin and turned around for the last time. “i’ll go ahead and let the rest know that the trial is still under way.”

“you should already know that your death won’t be quick and painless.”

and just like that, the door shut once more, sealing his faith. sunday felt numb. he knew he could’ve accepted her offer in the first place, at least for robin. but right now, he couldn’t bare to see her face again. not after what he’s done.

he can’t run away from his sins, after all.

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“wow, golden hour is so… golden.” you mumbled, walking around the hustling and bustling city. “it almost makes me feel like i wanna spend all my money on the casinos.”

“yeah yeah. do that and you’ll get caught by the bloodhounds.” silver wolf spoke through the hologram as she crossed her arms. “oh yeah. kafka told me to remind you about her gift. seems like she really wants some new shades.”

“shades huh?” you placed your hand on your chin. “doesn’t she already have like fifteen pairs of them?”

“well yeah, but i’m sure she’d like some from penacony.” she looked around before pointing at a store on the side. “over there, they’re selling some sick looking things.”

“wolfie… that’s a game shop.” you stared at her in disbelief before shaking your head. “unless you want me to get kafka some shades based off some paper birds.”

“anyway, how much time left do i have till i have to break a bird out of its cage?”

“three system hours and twenty-five system minutes.” silver wolf typed something in the air before her relaxed expression turned slightly more serious. “you better start moving [name]. some bloodhounds are getting close.”

“alright. i’ll move and get something for kafka. and a new console for you.”

“haha, that’s what i’m talking about, [name]. alright, i’ll get back to you once you break in. try not to get spotted. i hope you maxed out your stealth points.”

“yeah yeah…” you muttered, turning off the hologram before placing the device into your pocket.

as you set your eyes on the game store, you wondered what kind of games they would be selling in a dream?

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“thirty system minutes.” silver wolf said in your headset as you started to walk to sunday’s supposed location. “apparently, his trial is in about an hour, so security in the area is a lot more tight.”

“should it really matter if i make a big scene or not when i break in?” you mumbled quietly into the mic as you passed by some people. “i mean after all, we’re here for one person. break in, save him from the cage or whatever, and leave.”

“eh, if you’re all in on min-maxing your bounty when you’re caught, i’m fine by it.”

“what?! no way, i’m stuck on 6.9 billion credits.”

you could hear silver wolf’s smirk over the mic. “nice. well, it doesn’t matter anyway. it’s about to go up to 7 billion.”

“hey! you aren’t authorized to enter here.” an ipc guard blocked your way to the entrance of an ipc building. “turn around, or i’ll have to resort to force!”

“7.1 billion. sorry, miscalculated.” silver wolf replied as you pulled out your weapon. “don’t worry, i have the screenshot of your bounty, and i’ll share it with the others. anyway, the guard just called back up. good luck.”

“thanks wolfie. i’ll take it from here.”

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sunday sat still. he was counting the seconds, minutes, and hours, he had left once jade closed the door. he had been stuck in complete silence, minus his own heartbeat and breathing, for four hours now.

as soon as he heard footsteps, he knew that his time was up. he stopped counting. at this point, he wondered if he should finally look at jade in the eye.

“dang it, it’s locked!” an unfamiliar muffled voice came from the other side. his wing twitched, suddenly curious at the foreign voice.

that’s… not what he was expecting at all. was someone else besides jade going to escort him? or is it someone unauthorized trying to break in?

“ugh, i’m just going to brute force it.” the voice said before a loud audible thud filled the room. sunday noticed only a small dent appeared on the metal door.

“dang it, it’ll take me forever to open this!” you groaned as you looked around for some kind of lock or code. you weren’t tight on time, but you did wish to get out of the creepy dark hall and room as fast as possible.

“tsk.” silver wolf clicked her tongue after a brief pause. “if you’d wait a second, you wouldn’t have made yourself noticeable to five other ipc guards. anyway, the code is six-nine-four-two-zero.”

“ok- got it.” quickly, you punched in the numbers and the door opened before you.

you weren’t exactly sure what you were expecting when you heard that sunday was locked up in a room. but, you certainly weren’t expecting him to be chained up in a chair.

“jeez.. the security on you is quite impressive.” you mumbled, causing sunday to finally look at you confused.

“…you’re not the ipc..” he muttered, trying to recall where he has seen your familiar appearance before.

right, you’re a stellaron hunter, specially [name]. he had seen you on the ipc broadcasting channel here and there after your interference with the company.

but, what exactly are you doing here? what exactly are you going to do with a man who’s going to be dead soon?

“nope, not with those suckers.” you smirked slightly, partly listening to silver wolf’s keyboard as she tries to find a way to release the chains. “i’m [name], one of the stellaron hunters if you haven’t heard about me before.”

“right now, your trial is upcoming in a couple of minutes, but i’m here to get you out.” giving a thumbs up, sunday shook his head.

“…don’t. i deserve what i’m going to be charged for, even if it means death.” he muttered, turning away as you looked at him surprised. you were honestly expecting him to be ecstatic to leave.

well, it doesn’t really matter how he feels. after all, the script did say to free him from the chains.

“uhuhh..” you said, listening to the footsteps outside that seem to be getting closer. “well, a little birdie told me to get you out of your chains, is to just snap them.”

“wait- you’ve.. disabled them??” sunday looked at his wrists to realize that the dull purple glow was gone. at a slash of your weapon, both of the chains snapped off his wrists.

he gasped, although he wasn’t sure why. surprise that the chains actually broke? relief that he’s free? or infuriated that a stellaron hunter is helping him?

“alright bird man.” you turned around as more ipc guards appeared at the door, aiming their weapons as you prepared to attack. “i’m going to save you, whether you like it or not.”

really, sunday himself wasn’t sure if he did mind being saved or not.

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“alright, that’s the last guy.” you huffed as the final body fell to the ground with a satisfying thud. “we’ll be leaving penacony as soon as we wake up.”

“and if you’re thinking about running away, i have a small bird keeping my eye on you.” you glared, causing sunday to respond with a small nod.

so, it seems she really is serious about breaking me out and taking me hostage. it’s no secret that the stellaron hunters are planning something.. yet, i’m in no condition to fight and resist. sunday said mentally as he followed you out of the area. although, i wonder who’s the other stellaron hunter she’s referring to as her bird…?

despite his suspicions, sunday believed that the best course of action is to do as you say as the two of you break out.

“alright wolfie, we’re at a safe area. get us out of the dreamscape before more ipc guards catch up to us.” you placed two fingers on your headset as silver wolf gave you the clear.

[previous] | [next]

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#honkai star rail #hsr #sunday hsr #jade hsr #silver wolf hsr #kafka hsr #sunday x you #sunday x y/n #sunday x reader #reader is gender neutral #no beta we die like misha

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captainlunaxmen · 1 year ago

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All for the Cameras

Chapter 1

Finnick Odair x reader

This is a repost since the old blog doesn't work anymore. 🥰

Chapter summary: y/n is the Capitol's Princess. Everybody in the Capitol loves her... unfortunately for her. This first chapter is a little introduction about her role as a "support mentor."

Chapter warnings: mention of rape, prostitution, and... it's the Hunger games... what can you expect

Masterlist

The Victory Tour is probably the one thing I like about the Hunger Games. The attention of the Capitol isn't directly at me, but at the Victor in question, especially the pervs' attention.

Everyone thinks that being President Snow's protégé is like being Capitol's Princess, well... that's just what the cameras catch, but it really isn't. I am no different from someone living in the districts.

I am a slave like anyone else.

Even though I won't have to deal with the creeps at the Capitol during the tour, I still have a job to do, I can't exactly let out a sigh of relief.

This tour is probably the hardest one I've ever had to experience. Turning a hunter into an actress for the Capitol is no easy job.

Katnis has many skills... many, but pretending to be in love with someone isn't her best. Unfortunately, her life, anyone's life, actually depends on it.

Snow made it clear to me.

I arrive in district 12 with Effie and the rest of the crew, ready to help the two victors make everything as believable as possible.

I decided to go to Peeta first, while Effie and Cinna went to Katniss.

"Yes?" Peeta calls from behind the door.

"It's Y/n," I answer.

He immediately opens the door to let me and his stylist in and pulls me in a big hug.

"I'm happy to see you," he says, almost relieved.

"Well, it's my job, pretty boy," I pull away with a smile, "how do you feel today?"

He takes a moment to answer.

"I'm okay, I guess, nervous too,"

"You'll be fine, trust me. You're a natural." I try to lighten the mood. He does chuckle, but I think it's not to make me feel bad. "Did Haymitch tell you what to expect, or did he offer a drink?"

"A bit of both," he actually chuckles this time, "more of the latter, but yeah."

"Good," I let out a small laugh too, "I guess a good thing about your situation is that maybe you two can help each other out."

"If she stopped treating me like a wounded puppy..." he bitterly says, shrugging.

"Yeah, well, try talk to her. Your situation is already hard as it is, dealing with it on your own... it's suicide."

He nods, so I decide to let his stylist work and go see how Katniss is doing.

"Hey there," I say once I enter the room Katniss is getting ready in.

"Hi," she says.

"How are you?" I ask, sitting on a chair.

"I've been better," she forces a smile in my direction.

"I figured," I send her a sympathetic smile in return.

I look around the studio, the atmosphere is quite cold despite the luxury, we are still in 12 after all. My eyes stop suddenly on the desk, that was pushed a little out of the way to make more room.

"That's..." I start, my throat feels tight all of a sudden, "That's a pretty rose."

I notice Katniss tensing at the observation.

Confirming my suspicion.

Snow's been here.

"Yeah," she flatly says. She turns to look at me, with a look that seems suspicious... or cautious, more likely.

I respond with a sympathetic look. Hopefully, she will understand I'm just as tense as her. She seems to, because she half smiles at me.

"It's showtime," Effie cheers, walking in.

"Break a leg," I say, hugging myself as I watch her heading to the door.

I take a deep breath and decide I need a drink, and the only person who can help me is a certain victor.

I sneak out from the back and walk to Haymitch's house.

"Haymitch?" I call as I knock at his door.

"It's open," I hear his grumpy tone from the inside, so I let myself in and look around for Haymitch.

"Oh!" He calls from the kitchen, "it's the Princess herself! To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Care to help a lady out? I need a drink,"

"Take whatever you want," he offers, taking a sip of his own drink.

I look around at the variety of bottles on display, finding my drink of choice. I take the whole bottle.

"You don't mind if I don't use a glass, do you?" I say, sitting down with him.

"Make yourself at home," he actually chuckles at that, and I soon follow after taking a big sip from the bottle.

This is what I like more about this tour, Haymitch's company. We can just sit in total silence and still be able to give each other comfort. He's one of the very few people who knows the truth behind the Princess facade, and I know about what happened to his family.

"Ready for the tour, princess?" He suddenly asks me.

"It's the only time I get to feel like my own person again, so... yeah, I'm ready," I answer with a bitter smile, "what about you?"

"It's gonna be hard for them," he simply says.

"I know," I deeply sigh, taking another big sip, "they need us... and we need them."

Haymitch just nods.

"Things are about to change," he says, almost solemnly, "better keep those eyes open."

I send him a questioning look to which he answers with a wink. Then, a knock on the door prevents him from elaborating if he even wanted to.

"Guess it's time to go," he announes, clapping his hands.

"Let the show begin," I take one last gulp before following him out and towards the train station with everyone else.

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We're heading to the first stop of this journey, distric 11. I already know this particular stop is gonna be hard for my Victors, especially Katniss. I take notice of her quietness and the tension in her body as Effie keeps in rumbling about all the fabulous things this tour will provide.

"Fabulous food, fabulous wine, the massages, spa treatments." She explains, "I told them nothing but the best for my two victors. It all needs to be..."

"Fabulous?" Haymitch finishes for her with a hint of teasing in his voice, mimicking her demeanour. I try to hide my smile into my cup in tea.

"Exactly." Effie answer, not bothered by him, "Now, the schedule is a bit of a bear. 12 days, 12 districts. But it's mostly parties, celebrations, adoring fans to greet you at every stop along the way, and then wrap it up on the Capitol. All you need to do is give a few speeches, wave at the crowds, and enjoy your time in the spotlight. You've earned it."

Oh shit.

"What did you say?" Katniss, basically, demands.

Here we go.

"Katniss." Peeta calls, trying to calm her or make her drop the subject.

"I said, 'Enjoy it, Katniss, you've earned it.'" Effie repeats.

"By killing people." Katniss scoffs and stands up to leave, ignoring Effie's weak try at scolding her.

There's silence.

"Well, isn't this a good start?" I say, holding my hand out to Haymitch, who catches on and passes me a bottle of whiskey chuckling.

I ignore Effie's glare and pour some alcohol into my tea.

My eyes lock with Peeta's, so I take the opportunity to glance at the direction Katniss went to silently telling him to go check on her. He nods and gets up to follow Katniss.

Haymitch follows him with his eyes, then turns to me.

"Are you plotting something?" He asks.

"Not at all." I simply answer, "they need to stop avoiding each other like the plague when they're not on TV. It's better to pretend to be in love with a friend than a stranger."

He simply looks at me nodding, impressed.

Effie lets out an annoyed puff and walks away.

Once she's out of the carriage, I turn towards Haymitch.

"Anything to say about my eyes?" I ask, hinting at the conversation we had back at his house.

He simply smiles and pours some more alcohol into his glass.

"Just keep 'em open, princess," he says, "wide open, guard up."

I roll my eyes, "Alright, alright. I will. Anything else you wanna share?"

"Did you hear from a certain fisherman?" Haymitch asks, instead of answering my questions.

"I don't know what you're talking about. " I say shrugging, and I take a sip from my cup.

"Mh," he hums, "isn't he the first Victor you helped train?"

"Why all these questions?" I slightly snap.

"No reason. This is the first time we get to properly bond, don't wanna waste it,"

"You want to bond?" I let out an incredulous laugh, "why?"

"I just proclaimed myself your... father figure," he opens his arms to present himself.

"Okay..." I trail off, standing up, "Whatever you say,"

I start to walk off, too, shaking my head slightly laughing.

"Oh, c'mon!" I hear him yell and laugh.

I shake my head while I'm heading to my room to rest a bit before we arrive in district 11.

As I lay on the bed, my mind can't help but wander to said fisherman.

Finnick freaking Odair. Winner of the 65th Hunger Games.

That was my 4th time assisting the mentors in preparing the tributes for the games. At the time, Snow wanted the people to see me more involved in the making of the games since they 'love' me so much. The president saw this as an opportunity, I saw it as a punishment, having to help train tributes, some of them being my age only to see them get killed. Then the 65th Hunger Games came, and so did Finnick. We were the same age, bonding was inevitable, even though he was cautious... which was understandable, but we managed before he had to go into the arena.

When he won, I was the happiest I've ever been. Then when he came back he was changed, again, that's understandable, but he started to push me away... with no explanation.

Then we both turned 16. Then we were forced to be close again.

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A knock on the door pulled me away from my thoughts, Haymitch's voice warning me we had arrived in district 11, and it was time to go.

We get out of the train, expecting some people celebrating and stuff like that, but nothing of sort. Effie is quick to express her disapproval.

They lead us to a car and let us in, where Effie start to explain the situation to Katniss and Peeta.

"The mayor will make some introductory remarks. And then you just have to say a few words." She says, "it's customary, of course, to give a brief eulogy to the district's fallen tributes. For 11, that's Thresh and Rue. Here are the speeches."

Effie hands some piece of paper for them to take, I see Katniss' expression falling even more at the mention of Rue, predictable, so Peeta offers to be the one doing the talking. Katniss' grateful face almost breaks my heart, I'm... sort of used to see children die in the games, she wasn't... worst of all, she built a friendship with her.

"You got this." I say to them both, Peeta sends me a kind smile, while Katniss nods and takes a deep breath.

We arrive at the Justice Building, where we all wait for the mayor to call the Victors out.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the Victors of the 74th Hunger Games. Katnis Everdeen and Peeta Mellark!"

Once they are out, we get to see them through a screen.

"Thank you," Peeta says into the microphone, while Katnis is staring at something, I can imagine it's Rue's family. "We're honoured to be here with you today. And to be with the families of your fallen tributes."

There's a long pause, Peeta glances at the cards in his hand and... put them down...

"He put down the cards." Effie gasps.

Haymitch tries to shush her, and she slightly snaps, "Why do I bother?"

I lock eyes with Cinna, who's standing next to me, we share a questioning look before elbowing back at the screen.

"Though they fought and lived with honour and dignity until the end... both Thresh and Rue were so young. But our lives aren't just measured in years. They're measured I the lives of the people we touch around us. For myself, for Katniss, we know that without Rue and without Thresh, we wouldn't be standing here today." He really is a natural. "So in recognition of that, knowing that it in no way can make up for your loss, we'd like to donate one month of our winnings to the families of the Tributes, every year, for the rest of out lives."

Oh, oh...

"Oh shit," Haymitch comments, and I bring a hand up to my open mouth shocked.

"Can he do that?" Cinna asks, though, I think he already knows the answer.

"He can't. But he did."

"Why doesn't he just stick to the cards?" Effie sighs.

Peeta than thanks the audience, looks at Katniss, and starts to walk back inside.

Katniss does just a few steps backwards, but she keeps staring at Rue's family.

Then, she gets closer to the microphone.

"Oh..."

"I just wanted to say I didn't know Thresh. I only spoke to him once. He could've killed me, but instead, he showed me mercy. That's a debt I'll never be able to repay." Then her eyes are back on Rue's family, " I did know Rue. She wasn't just my allay. She was my friend. I see her in the flowers that grow in the meadow by my house. I hear her in a Mockingjay song. I see her in my sister Prim. She was too young. Too gentle. And I couldn't save her. I'm sorry."

I feel my heart breaking at her words. She's right. She's too fucking right.

Before Katniss could add anything, there's a whistle coming from the crowd.

A very familiar one.

A man does the same salut Katnis did on the arena after Rue's death. Everyone in the crowd soon follows, and the Peacemakers are quick to weapon up and head towards the people, who can't do nothing but clamoring.

They're clearly pointing at the man who started it all.

As Katniss tries to get to him, to stop the Peacemakers, she is sized by two of them and forced back inside.

The man was dragged on the stage, the people are screaming, terrified. Before the doors can close we see one of the guards shoot and kill the man.

"Fuck!" I turn around, Cinna a gently rubs my back. I hear Katniss screaming and trashing around, I look back at them and see Haymitch gathering both Peeta and Katniss to follow him, he nods at mw to do the same and I do.

Once we are out of sight and ears Haymitch just snaps.

"You two have a very simple task." He scolds them, angry.

"I never meant for anyone to get killed," Katnis cries, "he has to know that."

"What are you talking about? Who has to know what?" Haymitch asks.

Snow...

"Snow. He came to see me. He's worried about rebellion in the districts. He thinks that they don't believe our love story," she explains, breathless.

I run my hand through my hair, frustrated.

"So he wants you to make them believe it? Does he thinks it will calm this shit down?" I ask and Katnis nods.

"You know, Katniss, you should told me that before I went put there, and tried to give these people the money." It's Peeta's turn to snap.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do. He threatened to kill my family." She explains.

"Well, I have family, too" He replies, almost annoyed at her, "Okay? People that I need to protect."

"What about them? Who protect them?" Haymitch pressures.

I shake my head, still shocked and still infuriated.

"Katniss, what were you thinking?" Haymitch keeps going.

"I was thinking about Rue. Haymitch, please... please, just help me get through this trip. Please just help us get through this." Katniss begs, crying even more.

"This trip? Girl, wake up." He snaps his fingers to emphasise his words, "this trip doesn't end when you get back home. You never get off this train. You two are mentors now. That means that every year, they're gonna drag you out, and broadcast the details of your romance. Every year, your private life becomes theirs. From now on, your job is to be a distraction so people forget what the real problems are." He explains perfectly the 'life of a victor', it's so true it's nauseating.

"So what do we do?" Peeta asks, already composed him.

"You're gonna smile," I say, "stick to the cards Effie put effort into. And be the happy, forever in love couple the Capitol thinks you are... you'll get used to it." I say the last part with a heavy heart, knowing they don't deserve it. No one does.

Haymitch brings Katniss is for a hug, trying to reassure her, I squeeze Peeta's arm.

"We'll help you."

Peeta gives me a grateful smile, then they both take a deep breath and we all head back down.

"Eyes open, princess." Haymitch whispers to me, gently patting my back. I, again, look at him confused and just keep on following everyone back to the train.

And sticked to the cards they did.

----------

I feel like I can't breathe, I'm constricted, I can't move.

I look up and see the blue-haired guy on top of me, he's probably enjoying my terrified expression, because he smirks, he shushes me as if he's dealing with a child. He thinks he's being sweet and reassuring, while he's the complete opposite.

I try to push him away, in vain. It's like moving a wall... yet he's not that much bigger...

"Sshh, sweetie... it's okay, I'll take care of you." He says, caging me in even more.

I attempt to move back, but he's faster, he opens my legs with his in one quick motion.

----------

I wake up, shaking and panting. My heart is beating so fast I'm sure it's going to explode. I shake my head.

"Just a nightmare, just a nightmare," I keep repeating to myself like a mantra.

I get up from the bed and head to the bathroom where I wash my face to wake me up more. I look at my reflection and again I repeat that it was just a nightmare.

I get dressed, I figure there's no point in going back to sleep, I don't think I would be able too, so I exit my room and head to the restaurant car where I find Haymitch. Not so surprising.

He looks up as soon as he hears me, his expression almost asleep, but when his eyes meet mine, his expression turns into a worried one.

I sadly smile at him as I sit next to him, the car is still quiet dark except for the dim light coming from a small lamp next to him.

"Who was it this time?" He asks, he's trying to not make it look like it bothers him, but I know he's worried.

"The general's son," I say monotonously.

"Aah," he sighs, "the one with blue hair?"

"Yep."

"The loyal one." He nods to himself.

"The very one, the first too." I sigh, leaning back in the armchair. "The asshole thinks that just because we 'lost it' together means he owns me."

"Was that his first time too?" I know he wants to laugh at him, but he keeps it too himself, this time.

"Yap. His father thought it was 'right about time' so he talked to Snow, who, oh so kindly, accepted. Next thing I know I'm treated like a present. Everytime he achieved something big, his dad paid for my company, every birthday too." I sigh again, more deeply, bouncing my leg anxiously. "When he got a job, I was with him. Every month."

Haymitch takes a deep breath and hands me a bottle, which I gladly accept taking a big swig from it. He then takes my hand and squeezes it reassuringly, then lets go.

"He got daddy's job."

"Oh yeah. He couldn't do anything without daddy's power," I scoff out a laugh, Haymitch does too.

We, then, keep silent until it's time for everybody to come I'm and have breakfast and get ready for the final stop.

The Capitol.

#the hunger games fic #the hunger games #the hunger games x reader #the hunger games x y/n #finnick odair x reader #finnick odair imagine #finnick odair #finnick x reader #finnick imagine #the hunger games imagine

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aching-tummies · 10 months ago

Note

Response to the hunger rp-starter! (Btw I love your hunger prompts you should totally do some more 🤭)

I’d take this little predicament you’re in as the perfect opportunity to listen to your tummy rumble. Since you don’t plan on filling it anytime soon, I’ve got all the time in the world to listen to it complain. I’d pull you into my lap and turn the volume on the movie down so I can hear your tummy better, and I’d keep both hands on it so I can feel the growls vibrate against my hands. I’d poke and prod at it a little when it gets quiet, we don’t want this perfect serenade to end, do we? If the movie ends and you’re ready for a snack, I’d tell you no. Maybe, if you ask politely, you can have a few popcorn kernels, I’ve already emptied most of the bowl by now anyways. I’d listen to your hollow gut continue to beg all night, and as a reward for letting me indulge in your angry tummy, I’ll make a nice breakfast for you. Something light and easy so it doesn’t get upset again. Maybe even keeping you a *little* hungry so I can hear that belly yell at me again 🤭

Response to this. Thank you for including which starter/post you're responding to! Makes it easy to link it. Also, just a reminder that provided you give me enough to find whichever RP-starter anyone wants to reply to--any of the ones on my blog are fair-game and I'll post/fill what I receive when I get around to writing something that's worthy of the responses ^^

I get up, intent on confining myself to the bedroom while you enjoy the movie. You grab my wrist, gently tugging me back to the couch.

"C'mere." You murmur, pulling me onto your lap until I'm seated between your legs. I watch your hand deftly lower the volume on the T.V., relegating it to ambient noise rather than the main feature of tonight.

"Babe--y-you like this movie though." I protest, wincing as my tummy snarls in the throws of a painful hunger pang.

"I love this a lot more." You whisper breathlessly, hands roaming over the oversized sweater I have on. Eventually, your hands snake their way under my sweater to make contact with my sensitive stomach.

My stomach roars, your massaging hands stimulating my organs and stirring up the hunger pangs. I can't help but wince and moan in your lap, squirming whenever a particularly painful cramp assaults my tummy.

After twenty minutes, I realize that this bout of hunger pangs has gone on far longer than any that I've had all day. Usually, the cramping eases after fifteen minutes and the growls only ever sound for about ten minutes. It's been over twenty minutes of griping, churning, and growling without any signs of easing up. On the contrary--the growls have only gotten louder and more frequent. The gnawing chasm-like feeling in my guts has only grown too--like a yawning maw or something.

"Babe!" I hiss, realizing what you've been up to as your left hand massages small circles in a line across my torso--just beneath my diaphragm. Your right hand rests firmly over my navel, a finger lodged deep into it and swirling occasionally, nudging at my sensitive intestines every time a hunger pang rolls through them. I don't have to see your face to know that you're grinning now that I've caught on to your little game.

You've been stimulating my digestive tract on purpose--left hand searching for and stimulating my pyloric valve while your right coaxes the hunger cramps into forming. It's no wonder the hunger hasn't ebbed, but only gotten more intense while sitting in your lap.

You turn up the volume on the movie as I squirm in your lap. I'm getting flustered as I realize that you're playing coy on purpose. Sighing, I lean back against you to try and at least appear unbothered by what's going on. I watch the movie, same as you, but my mind is 100% on the sensations in my abdomen. Your massaging hands slow down just a tad as your attention becomes split between the movie and what's going on beneath your palms. For the whole two hours, you keep massaging my stomach--pressing deeper whenever the growls get too quiet. Each time you press a bit too hard causes me to gasp, introducing more air into my system and creating more growl-fodder as it gets mixed into my guts by your massaging hands. Your right hand occasionally moves from where it's firmly planted over my navel to pinch and prod all over my lower belly. By the end of the movie, my intestines are thoroughly sore from all the pinching and prodding and my upper digestive tract feels like mince-meat from the firm massaging and pinching it has endured over the last two hours.

An ear-splitting growl punctuates the movie just as the credits begin to roll, tapering off only as the screen becomes covered in text.

"Nnngh…ooohhh��" I moan, squirming as what feels like a 7.0 on the Richter scale quakes across my digestive system--the epicentre somewhere around my stomach-organ.

I try to get up but your hands wrap firmly around my belly.

"Nnngh…b-babe…lemme up. 'm gonna…gonna find an apple or something 'cuz I'm not gonna be able to sleep with my stomach this active and empty." I mutter with a pout. You nuzzle against my neck, arms tightening around my noisy belly.

"Hm? No." You murmur against my neck.

"Babe--please! My stomach hurts!" Another loud rumbling shakes my digestive tract and I know for a fact that you had to have felt that one too. "See? I'm hungry and it's gonna wreck itself if I don't give it a little something. Water? Tea? Please, babe--I know tomorrow's a day off, but I really want to get at least some sleep tonight after the week I've had."

You shake the bowl of what was once popcorn at me suggestively. I look down into it and scoff.

"I'm not gonna swallow kernels, love. Popcorn in any form upsets my tummy on a good day and the whole point of fasting was to enjoy freedom from a week of indigestion." I tell you firmly, crossing my arms over my chest even as my stomach continues to snarl.

"Fine. Tea, then." You relent, letting me out of your hold.

I scurry off to the kitchen, quickly chugging a bottle of water from the fridge in hopes of quelling the gnawing ache in my guts enough to not be a distraction. The cold water trickling into it must anger my tummy because the cramps and grumbles it causes make me regret chugging the water straight from the fridge.

I bustle around the kitchen, setting the electric kettle to boil as I open the cabinets to hunt down a mug and to decide on which tea to brew. I settle on Ti Kwan Yin and put three scoops into a large French Press. You'd probably kick up a fuss if I tried using anything with berry or chocolate additives. Granted, I don't like those types as much as Chinese-style teas--but you'd probably nit-pick if I came back with something resembling hot chocolate or juice rather than leaf-water.

Once the water is ready, I rinse the leaves with a splash before letting the tea infuse in the next pouring, leaving the plunger on the French Press up to allow the leaves to dance in the water for a while as I select a mug from the cabinet. The creaking of our bedroom door lets me know that you've abandoned the living room and are waiting for me in the bedroom now. With you no longer watching me, I debate eating that apple. You'd probably be upset with me if I did. I know that you're already going to do your best to keep me up all night--endlessly entertained by your game of keeping my stomach in a constant state of 'hungry-and-noisy'. You'd probably do even worse to me if I put anything solid in my stomach so I refrain from eating that apple.

I do opt to chug a mug of the tea (adding cold water to cool it down faster) before I bring a refilled French Press of tea and two full mugs into the bedroom. Chinese-style tea isn't your favourite, but I'd feel rude for not at least offering you the second mug. Odds are that all of it will end up in my belly which is fine by me if it quells the gnawing, achy hunger pangs.

You've already rearranged our bed into a bit of a nest, patting my side of the bed suggestively. I set the items on the night-table and slide into bed, my stomach sloshing and letting out a watery rumble as the ice cold water and the lukewarm tea slosh about inside.

Before I'm even settled, you're already pawing at my stomach, pressing into it and sloshing at it. You're already using my stomach as a pillow as I finally get settled.

"Aw…do you hear the ocean, babe?" I tease as my stomach lets out a loud, watery burble right into your ear.

You spend all night alternating between dozing on my stomach and prodding at it. Shockingly, I manage to doze off for a couple of hours in spurts throughout the night. I wake whenever a particularly painful hunger pang quakes through my belly, often caused by your incessant poking, prodding, and sloshing of my tummy. Midway through the night, you wake me to have me chug the two mugs of now-cold tea and I manage to get through half of what's in the French Press as well before a sickly burble causes me to stop. I'm full--my stomach flooded to capacity with tea. Even as my stomach protests the fullness, hunger still ripples through the watery sack that is my stomach, organs convulsing and desperately searching for something with some substance to digest but finding absolutely nothing as I've refrained from swallowing anything solid for almost thirty hours now to allow the week-long bout of indigestion to pass.

In the morning, my stomach has finally quieted down. No more gas or excess tea to cause rumbles no matter how much you poke or pinch. Doesn't seem to stop you as I wake to you trying all manner of things to my belly. I wake-up to the sensation of you placing a hand firmly over the upper quadrant of my stomach and firmly pushing down as though to squash a gurgle out of me. A pitifully quiet, whiny rumble resounds through my stomach--whining for breakfast. Even though it's muted, it isn't any less painful than the loud grumbles that ripped through my gut throughout the movie.

"Oooh…nnngh…babe…c'n I…c'n I please have something for breakfast? Nnngh…stomach acid's gonna burn a hole through my gut if I don't." I whimper, rubbing at my stomach as it continues with the pitiful, whiny rumbles.

"Sure thing, sweetie. How about you wake up and I'll make us breakfast?" You suggest.

I nod, lazing about the bed as I try to find the energy to get up. I moan as you pat my stomach roughly before you go, triggering another slightly louder rumble. My guts are still sore from your handling of them and I guess that you've been teasing my pyloric valve while I've been asleep. That's the only explanation for why my torso feels like it was put through a meat tenderizer.

I sit up with a groan, emptiness amplifying as everything shifts. An urgency registers in my brain and I limp to the washroom. My stomach is dreadfully empty, but all that tea and water definitely went somewhere, resulting in another organ getting distressingly full. It's a miracle that we didn't wake to wet sheets--especially with you man-handling my torso all night.

Business taken care of, I stop to brush my teeth as well. The minty taste of the toothpaste is amplified as my taste-buds haven't had anything but the slightly metallic-tasting tea in almost 40 hours now.

By the time I leave the master bedroom to find you in the kitchen, my stomach has begun to growl in earnest again. It roars at the sight of half a slice of toast and a couple of strips of bacon on a plate.

"Sorry, darling. We're out of eggs. Welp--eat up!" You tease, finishing the last bite of the other half of the toast. Sighing, I pick up the toast and begin to nibble on it, hoping that by prolonging the eating process that I can trick my stomach into thinking that there's more than there actually is. I sigh as I feel you wrap an arm around my waist--clearly intent to mess with your favourite part of my anatomy all day.

"You'd better be treating me to something amazing--and filling--at some point today, babe." I warn you as my stomach growls angrily, indignant at the lack of food available to digest as I finish my last slice of toast.

#hunger kink #tummy noises #Tummy RP-Ask

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thgfanfictionlibrary · 2 years ago

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Active Authors Masterlist (3)

Part 1 / Part 2 /

***Active (on this blog) is defined as a blog/writer who has updated within the past year. Inactive (on this blog) is defined as a blog/writer that has not been updated at all in the past year+. On THG Writing Hiatus (on this blog) is a blog/writer who has updated within the past year but has not posted a fanfic in the fandom in the past year BUT they may return to writing in the future. Lists will be updated as needed based on activity. ***

Created: November 17th, 2023

Last Checked:----

ipsygrace :: ao3, ao3, tumblr

Popular Fic: Peeta's Games: The Hunger Games from Peeta's point of view. This follows the original work as closely as possible and much of the dialogue is taken from the original and owned entirely by Suzanne Collins. (@igsy-blog)

JHsgf82 :: ao3, tumblr

Popular Fic: What's Mine Is Yours: Peeta's POV. Post-Mockingjay/Pre-Epilogue. A pregnant Katniss is feeling sick and scared. Peeta does his best to care for her while dealing with his own fears. Response to the Fluff Drabble Prompt: “This was my lap. Now apparently this is your lap.” (@jhsgf82)

JLaLa :: ao3, ffnet, tumblr

Popular Fic: Two Wrongs: “Katniss, you’re my best friend and I love you but seriously-marry you?” A marriage for the unmarriageable. Modern Day AU, set in San Francisco. (@jlalafics)

katnissdoesnotfollowback :: ao3, ff.net, tumblr

Popular Fic: Wrapped in Red: Katniss is trying to be a good friend to her recently divorced pal. She really is. But this holiday season, fate, her own feelings, and Peeta��s daughter have other plans. An advent style Everlark story. (@katnissdoesnotfollowback)

katnissmellarkkk AKA VanillaCottonCandy :: ao3, tumblr

Popular Fic: Gravity: But he just stares at me for a long moment, his smile never wavering, then admits simply, "I'm just so happy that I threw you that bread." I feel my chest constrict, both moved by his words and exhausted from even standing inside this place again. And my eyes overflow then and all I can manage to say is, "so am I." / Katniss and Peeta, growing back together through a series of snapshots. Set Post Mockingjay. (@katnissmellarkkk)

LemonLuvGirl :: ao3, ffnet, tumblr

Popular Fic: Both of Us: An alternate ending to Catching Fire in which both Peeta and Katniss are rescued from the arena during the Quarter Quell. Our lips collide with gentle urgency, two half conscious minds struggling in the murky waters between sleeping and waking, layered with a need for comfort and something more. We kiss until he pulls back, panting, angling his hips away from mine. I know what he’s trying to avoid. He doesn’t want to scare me. But the thought of his body reacting to me isn’t nearly as scary as the idea that we almost never got to have this. (@lemonluvgirl)

LilyMaid :: ao3, tumblr, ff.net

Popular Fic: The Awkward In-between: Days after winning the 74th Hunger Games Katniss recognized her life was changing, not just her home. She was already mourning for that old life, when things were difficult, yet so simple. With a tightening in her chest and a fear she didn't understand, she wondered what would be left. Cannon Divergent AU- pre Catching Fire (@wistfulweaverwoman)

loungemermaid :: ao3, tumblr

Popular Fic: no grave could hold my body down (I'll crawl home to her): Finnick makes his way back to Annie, alive but in several pieces. He loses his right arm and leg to the lizard mutts in the sewer. While Thirteen can patch him up, he's going to have to go back, back to the Capitol, if he's ever going to get better. As it turns out, Peeta has to go too, has to try and pull his fractured brain back together. They help each other keep it together. Finnick is there to help when Peeta can't remember what's real and what's fake, and Peeta helps Finnick cope with limb loss (@loungemermaid)

MegaAuLover :: ao3, ffnet, tumblr

Popular Fic: Katniss Everdeen Is Not A Stalker: Canon AU- Katniss as a little problem, she can't stop looking through Peeta's window, trying to find a way to pay her boy with the bread back but as time goes on she realizes she wants more. But there is a problem the District is flooded with Peacekeepers and everyone faces danger as the Capitol tightens its reigns on the district. Can love bloom in the middle of adversity? Or will it shrivel in the face of surmounting danger? (@mega-aulover)

melissaeverdeen13 :: ao3, ff.net, tumblr

Popular Fic: give you my wild: a look into katniss and peeta's life as they grow back together after the war; their experiences with friendship, love, and parenthood. (@jenniferiawrence)

#authors #active authors masterlist #active authors #everlark fanfiction #thg fanfiction #everlark #masterlist #thg

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cooperscringezone · 2 months ago

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haii and welcome to the cringe zone !! heh (insert that smug ass tiktok emoji)

im cooper and ive decided to (mostly) make my tumblr about my ocs! below you'll find more info about me and all of my super cool and awesome creations

as you already know, im cooper! if you're tryna find me... well, anywhere, i likely go by cooperscringezone on any platform. speaking of other platforms, heres my toyhouse!! i try to keep it updated, and you can see every oc i have there if you're interested in more than the few I'll frequently post here,,

im super into portal, smg4, the hunger games, ena dream bbq, fallout, minecraft story mode, etc.. i have so many more interests but i think we'd be here all day so. this is all you get for now LMAO

i also have a neat lil tag system!!

cooper.txt = text posts

cooper.ask = ask posts

cooper.art = art posts

cooper.srs = serious posts

there will probably be more later,, theyre pretty straightforward so dont worry too bad GH

now enough about me... its time to introduce my ocs !!!

> KODY 🐵

lets start off strong with a familiar face if you've been to my blog before,, CONNOR!! or.. Kody, now? changed his name, oops. i named my pressure oc Connor and didnt feel like changing it so this stupid little monkey is Kody now ehhe

Kody is an smg4 oc!! he's introduced during lawyer arc and is sort of a little brother to Kong,,

he tried to help Kong and Nintendo against the smg4 crew but ended up joining the crew in the end!! bro hated doing legal stuff and thought they all seemed cool

he doesnt rlly have much lore after that!! other than smg3 is his best friend and Karen is basically his part time mom

his posts will always be tagged with "cooper.kody"

> HALE 🪶

moving on from Kody,, I'd like to introduce Hale!! shes one of my oldest ocs that i have record of and is still being actively used in a rp!! i think shes like? 4 years old now? crazy,, maybe longer ngl

ANNYHOOWWW shes an anti-hero who helped saved the world from some creepy insane eldritch lady so thats fun!! shes also currently being exploited by someone and used as a weapon,, extra fun! later ahes gonna go insane. love that for her 💕

her story is a mess, i cant lie. but ive restarted her rp like once or twice and i love her anyway bc i basically grew up with her and OUGH i just love her

i love slowly making her more complex as i piece together her story,,

i think shes my.fav in this list HEHEHEHE

her posts will always be tagged with "cooper.hale"

ok no more of me gushing over hale you guys will see that plenty enough later

> HAYMITCH 🌵

next up is Haymitch!! hes a fallout oc, his backstory shit primarily involving Cooper Howard (from the show) plus New Vegas plot,, timeline is kinda like not thought over at all during his rp canon so ignore the fact half of his plot could not feasibly work if i put him in an actual game.. BUT IM HAVING FUN so idc. hes a ghoul,, (turned when he was 18) and grew up with cooper howard as his mentor!! after like i think a few decades or so they part ways and Haymitch ends up working in new vegas under the CREEEPPP!! that Checkers is 🥀🥀🥀.. hes another oc of mine but i dont like him enough to give him his own intro. hes a very good gunslinger, often feared over his skills. he mostly works with the regulators after fleeing new vegas and deciding to chill in the Capital,,, he also has this STUPID cowboy getup and i love him for it

his posts will always be tagged with "cooper.haymitch"

enough horsing around (gahahahahha get it cause Haymitch is a cowboy), time for my last oc intro

> JUMBLE 🎭

meet Jumble!! my favorite jester,, hate this thing,, the creature,

Jumble is actually from the same rp as Hale!! they've just never interacted,,

Jumble is a devotee to one of the Gods in the rp, Dimentio, the God of chaos and misfortune!! whom is owned by my good friend toasty..

Jumble is way over the top with its faith and it's determined to spread as much chaos and misfortune as possible!! its lore is not super flushed out yet, as it was only recently introduced, but shhhhshshhsh its still one of my favs

its posts will always be tagged with "cooper.jumble"

OKAY THATS IT thank you for reading if you have !! plsplsPLS ask questions about them so i can be normal about them, ,,

if you do ask anything please specify who its towardss,, or specify if its a question for every character,

I'll also be posting normal ass content not just asks of them,, at some point,, trust

also dont be scared to ask ME questions!! i dont bite i promise

OKAYYY BYEE 💥💥💥💥

#cooper.txt #ocs #oc #ask me anything #intro post #introduction #smg4 ocs #fallout oc #cooper.hale #cooper.jumble #cooper.haymitch #cooper.kody

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babyrubysoho-maiden · 1 year ago

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Hello!

So, I watched the ovas, then read the manga and recently read the newly released version of the manga (I haven't read the doujinshis yet, maybe you can tell me if it was a mistake or not.) I'm torn regarding Taki and Klaus' relationship.

Do they have this game where Taki enjoys resisting, lusting over him and also along the same lines con non-con and obsession with Klaus and vice versa? The whole purity thing comes into play because of his status therefore having sex with Klaus defeats the purpose of it, yet Taki keeps doing it because is the only way the can be together now and in the aforementioned question? Also, Taki is shown to be very capable of defending himself (but with help? Like a mop, sword) The first few times Taki anf Klaus are seen to be intimate with each other, Taki had the choice to forbid Klaus to come near him but he doesn't and when Klaus takes Taki to his cabin it's explained how did they get there without nobody seeing them and in the manga of that scene Taki does say he can do whatever he wants in challenging way though he underestimates how serious Klaus takes it? Until Taki cries for Klaus to stop later on.

It would make sense for each of them to care for one another hence there are parts where Taki is shown to be concerned by Klaus' well-being, overall existence and tries very hard not to worry him despite what went down earlier and who's around them. Keeping his own bruised up and sore body a secret between him and his doctor.

Also, Klaus' hunger and demand for Taki's body and attention, ultimate time together, Klaus' disposition and usefulness and protection as a knight regardless the conditions. Klaus doesn't want to worry Taki either therefore he keeps popping pills but his new and old injuries never heal. Jumping from that point, I read somewhere in your blog I believe, that you mentioned that Klaus assaulted Taki because he was delirious; for context it was after Klaus was in the frontlines with the kid cadet. Did you mean because of those untreated injuries? Wouldn't that be too soon? And it doesn't start as an assault but it does end up like that. Taki asks for forgiveness for not fulfilling the promise or for not being properly together now? Taki later defends him from being tortured, let everybody know if Klaus did anything to offend him, he will take care of it himself and takes him away to his room. So, Taki says that he forgives him. Because maybe in his own way maybe he thought Klaus had no other choice? He thought he deserved it?

Later in the manga happens something similar where Klaus says his hunger for Taki is also filthy (Taki' status, Klaus' position, and their relationship?) and Taki slaps him, for a few panels more basically promising he wouldn't touch him again (and it's almost visible Taki' disappointment)Taki also makes sure that Klaus knows he belongs to him and he won't tolerate such behavior or disrespect (also referring to what happened earlier) But it doesn't last, I think chapters later, Klaus follows him into the showers, Taki tries to stop him but he retreats when he touches Klaus wounds then Klaus ties him up and feels him up and gives him chances for him to speak up (as Klaus has done in the past) and stop him, when Taki doesn't, he continues until Taki says 'no' and 'stop' but Klaus doesn't listen (he sees how turned on Taki is, as he had previously been but then again, the body reacts in one way but the mind/mouth does differently) Until he sees Taki's bruised body, a reminder of what he did to him, from when they were at his cabin, Taki's assault.

Maybe I answered my own question here but I also wanted to add it.

It's also curious that only then the bruises on his torso are visible but it might have been overlooked during editing and the timeline is confusing too (the manga jumps from toddler Taki, pubescent Taki, Academy Taki (18-19) to 20 year-old Taki)

Because that's how I interpreted it. Perhaps I missed something and trust me I really want to understand. If it's that way, I completely get it. I enjoy that kind of sexual chemistry/games/kinks (that can also go hand in hand with complex dynamics) in my personal life but if it's on a form of media, particularly queer media, I really would like clarification.

Then it also confirms my theory the fact that Taki goes to see Klaus, sees him tied up, banded up and unconscious, his doctor warns him not to untie him because he would be delirious and Klaus insisted it on Taki not see him for his own safety. Taki not only unties Klaus on his own free will but it seems to lock the door of the room and lays next to him fully knowing what could happen and when it does, he never shows any kind of distress, until it seems to be too much to handle and knows the doctor is outside but stops himself when Klaus asks him why. Why did he come? Why did he untie him? Then Taki fully lets go.

Later he sees all the blood and infection coming from Klaus injuries and of course he is worried and pissed because he never told him the truth and he is also mad at himself for never speaking up when he needed it. Alluding at the fact it wasn't about sex.

Can you see why I'm kinda all over the place?

So, first of all thank you for the ask! I can safely say it's the longest one I've ever had, and I don't know if I'm qualified to answer it🤣

I think a lot of your questions are entirely down to the interpretation of the reader, so any answers I give would be my personal opinion and general consensus reached in discussion with other fans.

First, I would say that the doujinshi are pretty much essential reading if you want a balanced view of their relationship. Because a lot of the doujin are stories of the two of them growing closer at Luckenwalde in a very sweet, natural and mutually respectful way. The development of their relationship that we see in the doujinshi serves two purposes: it makes their current dynamic even more painful to witness (because we know what a good relationship they're capable of having when they're outside the pressures of Taki's country), and I think precludes any idea that Taki might get pleasure in resisting. I don't think Taki gets anything from resisting but pain from guilt and remorse (because of what the two of them once were together, and because he feels he didn't try hard enough to explain what would be expected of Klaus once he became his knight). I don't think any of it is a game to Taki (although it might be a bit of a bitter and resentful game to Klaus sometimes).

As you said, Taki can defend himself perfectly well. I think maybe he doesn't because 1) Klaus is almost always injured when he attacks Taki, and Taki can't bear to hurt him, and 2) perhaps he subconsciously wants to send a message that he doesn't truly hate Klaus (just hates the circumstances that have brought them to this point). And yeah, to some extent I do think he thinks he deserves it. As Klaus comes to realise in the latest chapters chronologically, Taki is completely bound up with the idea of "sacrifice".

Klaus also feels huge amounts of guilt and remorse for what he does; problem is, it doesn't stop him doing it!

I don't have the bandwidth to answer all your questions about Klaus' mindset, but you asked:

"I read somewhere in your blog I believe, that you mentioned that Klaus assaulted Taki because he was delirious"

That is the assault we see in the more recent chapters (new Vols. 3 and 4), when Klaus has a very bad infection after being exploded in no man's land, and is also in serious withdrawal from morphine. The time he rapes Taki after the rescuing-the-cadet and getting injured in the arm (Vol.1), he wasn't delirious. He knew exactly what he was doing. Also, the bruises on Taki's body are from that more recent assault, not from the attack in the cabin. If you want a super simple timeline of these events, it goes like:

Klaus rescues cadet, gets injured in the arm

Takes Taki back to his cabin and assaults him

Takes Taki to Suguri for treatment, Suguri realises what's been happening

Klaus almost gets killed by Hasebe for being a "spy", injured arm is ripped up even more by his torture

Klaus is recovering with Taki looking after him when they get the news about the Eurotean train

Klaus and Azusa go to no man's land, Klaus is taking morphine to cope with the pain

Klaus gets blown up and drowned, which causes a bad infection

Klaus is being treated by Suguri and says he wants to give up the morphine because he knows he's reaching his limit (because Klaus has a history of drug addiction as well as Taki addiction)

Taki visits the hospital after his various other duties, sees Klaus' condition and orders Suguri to leave them

Suguri ignores Klaus' wish to keep Taki away because he can't say no to Taki, but injects Klaus with one more dose (this was a big mistake!)

Klaus does indeed reach his limit and attacks Taki while delirious

Suguri obviously realises what happened, and Taki tells him not to say anything to Klaus

A few days later (while Taki is still bruised), the Western Alliance attacks and they go out to intercept them

Klaus notices Taki has an injury on his wrist, follows him to the shower stalls, and forcibly strips him

Sees the injuries, and realises that the vague memories he has of the attack weren't a dream, he actually did it

Drugs Taki and takes him to Suguri, demands to know why Suguri broke his promise

Klaus and Suguri have a fight about sacrifice and how Taki is treated by his people

All the above happens in maximum a couple of weeks, probably less!

By the way don't try to figure out the chronology all in one go, you'd have to read the manga and doujins multiple times over to get it, cos she is deliberately all over the place🤣. It does actually all make sense, it just feels like it doesn't unless you reread. (One of the fans might have made a full timeline, though! I'll give you the Discord link and you can ask. The Discord is essential to me, haha.)

"Taki not only unties Klaus on his own free will but it seems to lock the door of the room and lays next to him fully knowing what could happen and when it does, he never shows any kind of distress, until it seems to be too much to handle and knows the doctor is outside but stops himself when Klaus asks him why. Why did he come? Why did he untie him?"

This is a very major point in the development of both Taki and Suguri (his doctor). I believe Taki came because he simply couldn't help himself. He loves Klaus and feels a huge amount of responsibility and guilt for the state Klaus has ended up in. Seeing him was both his wish and (what he perceives as) his duty as Klaus' master. Untying him was a foolish, emotional act, and then he refuses to call Suguri because he knows Klaus would be killed if he made a public scene about being attacked.

From this episode, in the (chronologically) following chapters we finally see Taki break down, then get his ass together and vow to actually do something to protect Klaus (we don't really know what he's planning to sacrifice yet, though). I think that's why Taki wouldn't tell Klaus what he had done while he was delirious: he was trying to protect Klaus from that knowledge.

From this episode, Suguri learns that obeying his master (as he has Taki's entire life) might not actually be what's best for Taki, because Taki can't be trusted to act in his own best interests. That's why in new Ch10 (it hasn't been published in a volume yet), Klaus rants at Suguri about Taki acting as a sacrifice for everybody, and says that if things get worse he'll take Taki far away from all of them. Then Suguri orders Klaus to do just that and keep him alive at all costs, even if Taki doesn't want him to, because he now knows Taki won't be able to take the steps to save his own life.

So in conclusion, I don't think the current dynamic these two have is really mean to be enjoyed as non-con kink (although obviously it can be!). I think it's meant to be shown as aesthetically beautiful (cos everything she draws is) but painful and bitter, to be contrasted with their past relationship in Luckenwalde (although this becomes much clearer when you read the doujinshi, including the nekomimi ones set in Luckenwalde). And as readers we're hoping like hell that they can get back to that loving and respectful relationship someday!

Anyway, feel free to join our MR Discord, it's much easier to ask questions there as they come, and there are a lot of knowledgeable fans on there!

#Epically long ask!

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himeofshyness · 2 months ago

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𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐨, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞! (◍•ᴗ•◍)

Welcome to HIMESHAI'S SPACE, a little blog universe where I share the things I love most. My name is Aliyah, but you can also call me Hime. I’m someone who has a deep passion for literature, art, baking, and exploring the gameworld of Fields of Mistria, Stardew Valley, and their incredible mods, especially SVE, RSV, & ES. After thinking it over for a long time, I finally decided to join this platform. On this blog, you’ll find a mix of content across various fandoms, but my focus will mainly be about these two farming games, FOM & SDV and its expanded mods. I hope you have a wonderful time here! ✨

💜𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓💜

This masterlist features my farmer OCs and their backstories. Alongside them, you’ll also find my stories, skits, gameplay snippets, and glimpses into my modded adventures across Stardew Valley and Fields of Mistria.

𝐅𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐎𝐂𝐬 & 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐁𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝙳𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚐𝚗𝚜

𝙱𝚊𝚌𝚔𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝙵𝚊𝚛𝚖𝚎𝚛 𝙿𝚘𝚛𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚝𝚜

𝐇𝐢𝐦𝐞'𝐬 𝐅𝐚𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬

🌻𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚍𝚎𝚠 𝚅𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚢🌿

Lotus Blooms Over Scars

Lost Between Realms

Beneath the Scent of Silence

Lost in the Sunset (turning this into a full oneshot)

A Moment by the Sea (Sebastian X Aleia)

Walking the Wire (Sam X Yvonne)

From Spring Blooms to Winter Warmth (Sam X Yvonne)

Fortuitous Encounter (Lance X Rosemary)

Chocolate and Confidences (Jio X Cerise)

A Symphony in Spring (Sam X Yvonne)

Seasons of Connections (Sebastian X Aleia)

A Symphonic Spring Wedding (Sam X Yvonne)

Autumn's Entanglement (Sebastian X Aleia)

Beyond the Memories (Sebastian X Aleia)

Unbreakable Melody (Sebastian X Aleia)

Sunrise at the Summit (Sebastian X Aleia)

Moonlit Hunger (Sebastian X Aleia)

Reckless Winter (Canon X OCs)

Love Across the Valley (Canon X Ocs)

Beneath Crimson Ties (Lance X Rosemary)

Reckless Assumption (Canon X OCs)

Unlikely Brotherhood (Canon X OCs)

🌷𝙵𝚒𝚎𝚕𝚍𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝙼𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚊🌾

Woven in Stardust (Caldarus X Isaria)

Caldarus's Accidental Guide to Wooing a Farmer (Caldarus X Isaria)

𝐇𝐢𝐦𝐞'𝐬 𝐒𝐤𝐢𝐭𝐬

After SVE 2.0 Update

IsaacXFarmer on a date, after SVE 2.0

How my Stardew Farmers meet Lance

Farmer needs help

Married Farmer sees an attractive NPC

After FOM Full Update

Sterling stop flirting with the Farmer!

Awkward Serenade

Confusing Confessions

Swords, Sarcasm and Survival

How to summon every marriage candidates

Riddle me this

Mayo Madness

After Fields of Mistria Update

The Self-Doubt Catastrophe

From Stone Cold to Heartthrob: A Farmer's Priorities

The Mirror's Truth

𝐒𝐃𝐕 & 𝐅𝐎𝐌 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐬

A raccoon called me "idiot" in my own native language

Wren shoves your farmer down a Skull Cavern shaft to test the depth before jumping in

How do my farmers cuss?

Sterling's love gifts are 🌻🌻🌻

Reminiscing that one rainy night

Finished the Mastery Cave

FINALLY achieved True Perfection ❤️

I finally got the tea set!

Another Sam Immersive mod

Cute perler beads keychain

Cute perler beads keychain Pt.2

My Farmer's Inner Thoughts: Caldarus experience

If your SDV farmer was in Fields of Mistria then who would they romance

Dreams are getting out of hand

𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐬 𝐈 𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 (𝐞.𝐠. 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬/𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬)

Lance and Jio dynamic

LanceXIsaac getting married but who proposes first?

SDV/SVE Bachelors react to the Qi fruit

My Farmer in a nun outfit 18+

Lance and Jio's Reactions To Seeing Their Spouse In A Sexy Version of Their Uniforms 18+

SDV bachelors react to Statue of Perfection/True Perfection

How would the adventurers, mages, or even their spouses react to the Farmer, who used to be a former assassin

SDV Bachelors would react if they discovered their spouse is a former assassin

RSV bachelor/ettes react to farmer a former assassin

SDV/SVE bachelors/ettes with Farmer as a former famous singer

RSV bachelors/ettes reaction to their kidnapping for revenge/ransom, where their spouse Farmer, furious, comes to rescue them

𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 (𝚍𝚒𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚏𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚘𝚖𝚜) 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚜𝚎 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚖𝚜.

AO3 ➡️ HimeOfShyness

Wattpad ➡️ HimeOfShyness

Instagram ➡️ himeofshyness

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐍𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐭𝐞:

#himespace✧#hime's thoughts✯#hime's sdv headcanons✿#hime's farmers #hime's fanfics #hime's skits #sdv #fom

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christiansorrell · 1 year ago

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Play-By-Blog #18: The Isle by Luke Gearing

Welcome to my ongoing play-by-blog of The Isle by Luke Gearing! We are playing this adventure with its original system, The Vanilla Game (adjusted somewhat to fit the format). You can check out the Play-By-Blog Repository to get all caught up if you wish.

How Play-By-Blog works:

I write up the situation, NPCs, and more, just like a DM.

You vote in the poll to help decide the character's course of action.

I roll the dice, resolve actions, and write them up next week.

So on and so forth for the rest of the adventure!

Notation:

[Text in brackets is out-of-character/GM text!] "Non-italicized quotes denote text from the original adventure!" "Italicized quotations denotes NPC dialogue."

Our character: Medon Girou - Magic Cutpurse

Our maps: The Isle, The Dungeon (so far)

[You can use the links above to find Medon's Character Sheet and map of the Isle and the so far uncovered portions below the surface. On the Dungeon map, you are currently in Floor 2, in Room 12.]

Now, back to the adventure!

You pull your katana from your side and slash down at the eel closest to your feet. [Attack Roll (d20): 5 - Between your AV of 11 and the Eel's AC of 2 - Hit!, Damage Roll (d6): 1!] You connect, but only just slashing lightly across the side of its head as you quickly step back away from the water.

The eel attempts to wriggle forward and reach you with its teeth-filled jaws. [Due to the difficulty of the eel to attack and fight outside of water, you will get a +5 to AC. Attack Roll (d20): 10 - Between its AV of 11 and your AC of 5 - Hit!, Damage roll (d6): 2!] The creature wriggles forward, as if it has been a long, long time since it has had anything at all to each and will do anything to keep you from escaping, and bites into your calf. Blood trickles down over your boots and into the nearby water.

The two remaining eels, tasting blood, attempt to reach out and attack you in the same manner as the first. [Attack Rolls (d20 - both eels): 4 and 20 - the first is under your AC and the second is over the eel's AV - Miss!] They snap out at you but are unable to carry themselves far enough out of the water.

You bring the katana down once more on the first eel. [Attack Roll (d20): 6 - Between your AV of 11 and the Eel's AC of 2 - Hit!, Damage Roll (d6): 4!] In a single swift motion, you sever the eel's head entirely from its body. [50 XP gained!]

Despite the death of the eel, the others press on, driven solely by their hunger. [Morale Roll (brave): 9, 4 - Under their ST of 6 - They keep fighting!]

They ignore the body of the first eel, crawling over it, and lash out towards you. [Attack Rolls (d20 - both eels): 6 and 1 - the first is over your AC and below the eel's AV and the second is under your AC - Hit and Miss! Damage Roll (d6): 6!] The second eel digs its teeth deeply into your thigh and pulls down, slashing at your flesh as it goes. [You are now at 0 Grit (your first line of defense which can be quickly recovered during rest) and just 5 Flesh (your lasting hit points).]

You took the first eel out easily enough. You and your katana can certainly do the job, but as the pain shoots up your body from your leg, you can't help but feel like you are closer to death than you may think. They are close enough on you now that you know turning to run would ensure they would bite at you, at least one time each, but a single strong bite from them could bring you down... [Mechanically, each eel would get a Free Attack if you do anything but attack back during your round (this means casting a spell, running, etc.). Still, it may be worth the chance, but then again both eels are also bested by you with a single, strong attack each.]

[This is tough choice! Either way could go quite bad or quite good. I'll leave the decision in your hands! See you next week! - Christian]

PBB #19 is up now!

#meatcastle pbb #ttrpg #indie ttrpg #ttrpgs #rpg #fantasy #luke gearing #play by blog #play by post #the isle #choose your own adventure #polls

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catastrxblues · 2 years ago

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INTRODUCTION !!

currently shadowbanned which means i can't interact in ANY way at all through this blog so sorry if you replied to my posts or mentioned me and i haven't responded 😭

“our sheer capacity for a feeling has got to be so unwieldy that we staggered under it, like atlas with the weight of the world.” — oliver marks, if we were villains.

palestine : masterlist | to help | thepalestineacademy | boycott | free palestine

⛧ okay so hi! i’m nadine. she/her. muslim. student. apparently an isfj. virgo. afternoons enthusiast. #1 full machine by gracie abrams enjoyer. think about everlark a lot.

┏ i like to read, watch, and sometimes write. but nowadays i really just prefer rotting and decaying on my bed because school is absolutely exhausting and i have no better idea than to use all my spare time for simply sleeping.

┏ STEM at heart, but sometimes all i really want to spend the rest of my life doing is reading, pondering over poems, learning to bake, crying over songs, writing in an immense amount and is good at it, working at a bookshop, collecting so many books that i have sagging bookshelves on the walls of my room, watching the moon, examining the stars, and enjoying the afternoon sun in a meadow or hills or somewhere with running creeks and flowers (but that's unrealistic so)

┏ i come on here to reblog, read fanfics, and rant about my obsessions (and also my life so sometimes this actually does feel like my little messy personal diary- that's a warning by the way)

──────────────────────•

-> currently reading : the ballad of songbirds and snakes by suzanne collins, six of crows by leigh bardugo,

-> currently watching : gilmore girls s2, brooklyn nine-nine s1, the summer i turned pretty,

-> some favorites :

(books) the hunger games, percy jackson / riordanverse, a good girl’s guide to murder, hp & the marauders, nevermoor, if we were villains, anne of green gables, djats & tshoeh, keeper of the lost cities

(artists) taylor swift, gracie abrams, phoebe bridgers, lorde, conan gray, sabrina carpenter, olivia rodrigo, maisie peters

(movies) mcu, romcoms, little women, thg adaptations, legally blonde, clueless, bridge to terabithia, lady bird, barbie, heathers, before sunrise

(tv shows) bridgerton, stranger things, heartstopper, jatp, asoue (show), disney channel shit (both), alexa and katie, nhie, lost in space (2017)

*(the italic ones are the ones i currently actively (and sometimes intensely) hyperfixate on on this blog!)

(+) fictional characters

[ i also will like to add that i am a peeta mellark, katniss everdeen, percy jackson, annabeth chase, anne shirley, jo and amy march, pippa fitz-amobi, and ravi singh enthusiast & i will defend them to the end of the earth thank you <3 ]

──────────────────────•

sideblogs & others

┏ i have a writing blog!! (@kitchentablebillsaredue) it’s not exactly a fanfic blog, just a blog to post all of my miscellaneous semi-personal mess <3 (it’s collecting dust right now because i didn’t realize how hard it will be to get myself to post some writings on even a small corner of the internet whoops)

┏ i created another (actual) sideblog because i was bored and i thought why not. it’s @andillwatchh (as in a reference to that famous little women 2019 scene) and it’s for some movies/shows insanity etc.

┏ another one thank you. @iborrowlibrarybooks mostly for bookish things & moodboards.

by no means this is a consistent fandom blog by the way, i'm just really annoying and can't stop talking. but yeah that's it!

#look i made it!!#(i ended up spending the entire afternoon making this instead of continuing my reading but oh well)#i’m not sure how to tag this though #blog intro #intro post #fandom shit #<3 #will be updated as needed #nadirants

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delewlew · 5 months ago

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meet the team principal ༘⋆༄.°⋆

i'm getting back into writing on this acc + i've had this blog for a few months but never made a meet the admin post so here it is!

name: four (yes like the number, no 1-3 weren't taken)

age: 22

birthday: august 1 (i'm not into astrology so idk my birth chart)

pronouns: she/her

sexuality: queer

non-f1 hobbies/interests: kpop, reading books, crocheting, crosswords/sudoku, coloring, baking, cooking, travelling

yes i'm a fantasy book girlie- mostly poc written but not exclusive to it so lmk if any of yall be reading books cuz i'd love a book friend!

favorite shows/movies: avatar the last airbender, legend of korra, marvel, star wars, hunger games, harry potter, she-ra, the owl house (basically anything gay, nerdy/dorky, or slightly loser-esque 🤌)

favorite singers/groups: sabrina carpenter (i'm an OG veteran stan of 10+ years!), sza, tyla, twice, aespa, nct 127, many others

how'd i get here: i needed something to watch bc i just finished the live action ATLA series and got bored. i saw DTS sitting there in my suggested cuz season 6 had just come out so i tuned in. then i tuned into the actual races and realized just how great they are, 2024 season was actually a great time to come in cuz wow the drama!

when did i start writing: i had a few kpop fic accs where i wrote wlw content for about 5 years but i lost interest from lack of engagement and a lot of my friends left. so i turned to ao3 and posted a few things there for ATLA and my old sideblog where i wrote for marvel characters. but once i got into f1 i just made this blog and started writing for a few drivers because i didn't see too many black fem reader fics so i write to help add more.

when do i post: whenever i can really. i don't like to pressure myself too much because then i get overwhelmed and it's not fun to write. so when i get the ideas or energy to write i do, but there's no set schedule as of right now

favorite drivers: lewis, lando, and charles are what i call my podium or top 3. however oscar has wiggled his way up in the mix and mick has my entire heart plus ollie and kimi are my sons...i also love our honey badger. i could go on really.

favorite team: honestly i'm just going to say mclaren but i'm not too picky about teams i just don't like redbull at all (not the drivers the TEAM)

any other motorsports: i did watch Born Racers and thought it was neat so i may tune into MotoGP at some point. i didn't watch F2 or F3 much last season but i'll be tuning in this year cuz i want my money's worth ($10.99 a month ain't cheap). i watched F1 Academy though and kept up with it closely.

are messages open: i love a good internet friend. as long as you're not a minor or a big effing weirdo then feel free to message me to be friends, i need more f1 friends but if we share any other interests that's fine as well!

any last thoughts: one thing i will note is that i don't keep up with the drivers personal lives like it's my own life. i don't stalk their IGs, locations, etc. i don't know when max's private jet took off and when it landed, i don't know all of the drivers friends and family names and who knows who and who's what to who. i don't keep up with the tea between WAGs. and most importantly i don't bash drivers for nonsensical reasons like their team building a better car or not liking the way someone said three words to someone else. it's really just not that serious to me so just a heads up that if you're that kinda fan i won't match your energy in conversation 😅

#meet the team principal

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twistedpagesbookblog · 1 year ago

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Best Young Adult Books

Hi guys, today as my first blog post I wanted to recommend the best Young Adult Books!

Percy Jackson By Rick Riorden

Genre: Fantasy

This is a Young Adult Fantasy story that pulls from Greek Mythology. This book has such an awesome adventurous plot and the urban fantasy world is to die for! And even though this book is written for a middle school or children's audience, teens and adults can enjoy this series all the same.

This is the story of troubled Percy Jackson who is going to a boarding school in New York. He’s always been able to see things that other people can’t. Until one day he is sent to Camp Half Blood, a summer camp for children of the Greek Gods, he is sent there in order to escape the Minotaur, which is a monster he has been seeing. He then discovers that the father he has never known is a Greek God. And someone has framed him for stealing Zesus’s lighting bolt. With the help of Annabeth the child of Athena and a satyr named Grover, they sent out on an epic adventure across New York to find the real lightning thief.

I thought this book was good so I rated it four stars.

The Hunger Games By Suzanne Collins

Genre: Fantasy

This is a young Adult fantasy/science fiction novel. About a teen girl in a post Apocalyptic world. This book is filled with action packed scenes.

This is the story of sixteen Katniss Everdeen. She is living in a futuristic world called Panem, where the whole country is divided into 12 Districts. Originally there were 13 but the last district was destroyed by the government for starting a rebellion. And because of that rebellion the government started the Hunger Games. In each district, a random boy and girl are chosen to fight to the death with each other, in order to survive and to get luxuries for their district. The government does the Hunger Games to control the people, so they wouldn’t rebel again. Anyway Katniss Everdeen goes to the reaping (the random selection of the Hunger Games) and her twelve year old sister Prim is chosen. But Katniss volunteers to go in her sisters’ place in order to save her life. Once Katniss is in the games she will have to fight for her life including against Peeta, her crush.

I thought this book was also good, I rated it 4 stars.

Twilight By Stephine Meyer

Genre: Fantasy

This is a fantasy book for Young Adult Audiences with a heavy romantic plot. This is a paranormal/supernatural story with Vampires. This is an urban fantasy story with teen characters.

Bella Swan has just moved in with her father, away from her home in Arizona and to Forks, Washington. A sleepy old town with a secret. On her first day in biology class she sits next to Edward Cullen, A mysterious boy who is utterly cruel to her at first. But then, suddenly, he turns kind. And Bella develops feelings for him. But soon she realizes Edward isn’t human.

I gave this book four stars.

The Fault In Our Stars By John Green

Genre: Contemporary

This is a young adult contemporary novel. The teen characters are very realistic. The novel deals with coming of age themes as well as love and death.

Hazel Lancaster has Lung Cancer. And her parents want to get her out of the house and make new friends so they send her to a cancer support group where she meets Augustus Waters, (or Gus for short). They become friends and fall in love. Hazal loves to read and has a book that she adores and wants to learn the ending of. But the author lives in Amsterdam. Gus uses his wish from the Make A wish foundation, which allows him and Hazel to go to Amsterdam together. But then tragedy hits.

I gave this book four stars.

The Mortal Instruments Series By Cassandra Clare

Genre: Fantasy

This is a fantasy book made for Young Adult audiences, with a heavy romance subplot. This book is also a paranormal/supernatural book with an urban fantasy setting. This book also has vampires and magic.

15-year-old Clary Fray is at a teen club for a halloween party with her guy best friend Simon when there is a murder by a bunch of teens with strange tattoos. Even more strange is that only Clary can see the teens. And then Clary's mother is taken by unknown forces. Clary then discovers that the teens are Shadow Hunters, (Basically demon hunters.) And Clary learns that the murder was them taking down a demon that looked like a human and that a demon took her mother. Clary learns that she is a shadow hunter and tries to get her mother back.

I rated this book four stars.

Okay guys that is all for this post, please like and repost and follow if you enjoyed it! Bye!

#bookworm #books & libraries #books #booklr #bookish #book review #book blog #bibliophile #authors #young adult books #percy jackson #the hunger games #twilight saga #the fault in our stars #the mortal instruments

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districtxii · 1 year ago

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it's not hard to fall when you float like a cannonball (everlark fic from 2012)

Posting this here on the new dedicated Hunger Games blog. It's the only complete fic I ever posted for this fandom, for a fic exchange back in 2012, even though I spent many hours in private RP.

Link to AO3.

Rating: T Warnings: none Word Count: 6,019 Post-Trilogy hurt/comfort everlark

it's not hard to fall when you float like a cannonball

🌿

My eyes follow the marks Peeta makes on the page, opposite a long burst of painstakingly neat handwriting that belongs to me. I can see where the pressure of my writing darkened and thickened the lines, corresponding with the moments when I clenched my teeth in anger or struggled for deep breaths that wouldn't turn into easy, overwhelming sobs. Some days it's harder than others, to write down those things that I refuse to forget.

Peeta had reached out and squeezed my shoulder, his thumb running up a cord of tension in my neck, his hand as steady as it is now while he draws on the paper. He asked me if I wanted to stop and I snapped at him, but his hand stayed in place for a while anyway. Finally, I wiped roughly at my face, drying beneath my eyes and against my cheeks and kept writing, causing yet another of the dark marks on a line.

I can't stop writing, even when it's harder to write down the things that had felt like hope, that had made me smile at the time. The things that I might say made me happy are the ones that bring me most dangerously close to stopping. They're all gone now, those moments, taken away or simply over, but I can't forget them. Peeta has forgotten too much, lost too much in his mind, for the both of us.

The sketch begins to take shape from the initial, seemingly random soft lines that look a little chaotic to me. I rub beneath my strained eyes and lean forward across the kitchen table against my elbows to watch more closely as the page becomes something almost living, the ghost of a moment I recalled on the page beside it. When I glance up at him, there is a faint smile on Peeta's lips and I know I'm not returning it. Instead, my mouth is a little agape and I reach for the book impulsively. The edge of the cover brushes against my fingertips as Peeta slides it over to me so I can see the image in the direction it's meant to be seen. I can't help but marvel at how deep the piece of paper has become, as if I could step into it. He captures the past as easily as any photograph, more easily. The drawing looks, feels real, and it's not even finished yet.

“It's good,” I say, remembering that I should probably give Peeta some kind of positive feedback for simply being here with me, for holding onto what he knows. It's more than that, though. It's so easy to forget. For such a long time I was without him. First he was left behind, taken by the Capitol, while I spent all that time in District 13, wishing for a person to be safe, to be there with me—a person who would never really come home. Then Peeta did come back, different, and then gone forever. The boy with the bread, the boy on the beach, not mine anymore and unreachable. Even with the pieces of him that seem to come back and to become a bit more real, natural each day, it's easy to lose just how much of it he was there for. I spent so much time trying and failing to steel myself against the raw, painful truth that the steady, naively adoring, real Peeta was gone, dead, killed in some cold sterile room in the Capitol, that I still don't dare let myself believe that he'll really come back, stay with me. But he was there for so much of what has happened to me, since that first reaping, and what he has drawn matches what's in my head, but he hasn't drawn it just from my writing. It's in his head, too. It belongs to him and he's sorted it free from the shiny, false memories the Capitol gave him.

“Thanks,” he replies in a leading tone that I'm sure is trying to draw a returned smile from me, like he doesn't believe I mean the compliment, but only in jest.

“... I'm going to get some air,” I announce abruptly, pushing the book back firmly into Peeta's possession and getting up from my chair.

“I'll come with you,” Peeta asserts, getting up with an urgency that almost startles me and still makes me worry about his leg. We just stare at each other for a moment and he reaches out to carefully close the book and set it out of harm's way. It's just a reminder that there's no one ever there besides us to spill anything on it or to damage it at all. The world is so still now.

“I'm going out into the woods,” I tell him, almost hoping that it will deter him from following me, but I guess it might be a bit of a test, too. I'm just not sure what I'm testing for.

“... And I'll make too much noise,” Peeta supplies, not quite a question. He looks down, away from me, apparently disappointed.

“No,” I say quickly and then wonder why I did. Now I've trapped myself, though, and have to keep going with the train of thought. “... No, I'm not going to hunt. If anything it might... keep anything from wanting to sneak up on me.”

Peeta's expression brightens a little and he pushes up the chair I had been sitting in, too and moves to follow me out the door. There's a little spark of satisfaction that runs through me when I see some kind of life go back into him at the promise of coming into the woods with me, but I don't trust it. I take a few backward steps and then turn around, tensely leading the way out the door, my thumbs sliding down into my trouser pockets for a moment until I pull them back out, compelled to fidget.

I'm meandering toward town and eventually on to the fence, so Peeta easily catches pace with me and we walk along in silence for a while. It only occurs to me after several minutes to glance over at him to see whether he seems to be enjoying it. I remember the last time he and I walked into town together. I'd asked him if he would run away with me—not just with me, though. My family, his, Haymitch—all gone now except for Haymitch who has enough liquor to last him at least another week or two. For a moment I want to hide my eyes from what remains of the 12 I knew, from what they're building back on top of it, but I keep my feet moving, going through the motions.

“Are you alright?” Peeta asks.

“Great,” I reply, a little breathlessly. I'm a little surprised at my attempt at sarcasm, but then I'm too busy worrying about seeing the raw earth above the mass grave that the Meadow has become. It still isn't much easier and Peeta being with me makes me even more aware. Soon we're passing by where the bakery once was and I notice the momentary falter and subsequent quickening of his step. All the things I know about his family with the exception of his father are somehow negative and fill me with resentment. His bruised face, the way the one brother who could have didn't step up to take his place, but if he had then I'd never have known Peeta at all. The thought gives me pause and I wonder if I should ask him if he misses them, but I know he must and I don't want to talk about all the things I miss anymore today. Instead, I reach out and brush my fingertips along the edge of Peeta's hand, not quite taking it in mine but drawing his attention down to my fingers and then up to my face. I expect some conversation to follow but instead Peeta takes my hand, apparently perceiving some invitation, and I don't revoke it.

When we finally reach the edge of 12, Peeta finally lets go and reaches down to hold up a section of the fencing for me as if I hadn't been crawling under on my own for years. This earns him a strange look from me for a moment, but I'm about to just accept it and squirm my way beneath to show him how at the very least when he speaks up.

“Finally getting out of the district with you... Running away,” he muses lowly, offering a sad smile in place of the hopeful, searching one I've gotten almost used to getting sometimes. The thought that his thoughts run along the same tracks that mine do, that the moments that make up my memory of the past are so entwined with his, makes something catch in my throat and I try to swallow it. I search his eyes for a moment and then look abruptly down at the ground at the looser section of the fence down at the bottom that's familiar.

“We can't run away anymore, Peeta,” I say simply, not sure why his name rolls from my tongue. There's nothing left worth running from and what's left of 12 is all that's left of home. Then I take a deep breath and get down closer to the ground to step through and roll my body beneath the fence to the other side. “Like this,” I say, settling my balance once I've gotten through to the other side. Peeta listlessly lets go of what he'd been trying to hold up for me and instead reaches out for the loose one and tries mimicking my movements with as much grace as he's ever managed. He makes it through, but when he's trying to get his balance again, I hear a metallic snapping that makes me terrified that the electrical current in the fence has gone live again even though I know better. Instead of being electrocuted, Peeta just stumbles back a little and I instinctively reach up to stop his progress backward. My hand against his back seems to give him the stability he needs to stop. He's holding the fencing still when he's much too far out from it because it has snapped away from one of its posts. I stare at it and at the slacked gap that it's now left just above the ground, a window between two places, the woods and the district, that I still can't imagine ever really touching.

The breaths that follow from me are a little halted and I find myself looking back at Peeta and wondering just how it was that he survived two arenas, even with my help—and then without it. I swallow hard and try forcing the kind of tentative, hopeful smile he gives me.

“Are you okay?” I ask.

Peeta nods and looks down at the fencing he's holding and lets it down gently, as if it might minimize the damage. While he does this, I look out beyond him and try to decide where to take him. The idea of taking him to the place where Gale and I looked out for such a long time seems wrong, off, so I set off to guide him deeper into the woods toward the only other landmark I can really think of.

- - -

“I didn't know this was here,” Peeta comments with some measure of awe when we're at the edge of the lake, surveying around it, focusing for a moment on the ancient, untouched building hidden away by time.

“You didn't know any of this was out here,” I remind him. Peeta exhales in the same halted way I had at the fence and hearing it from someone else, I realize it's some attempt at a laugh that something broken within each of us blocks from escaping. “... My father brought me here. That's... how I knew how to swim,” I tell him with the most careful confidence I can, as if someone else might be around to hear us and I don't want them to. There's no one else, but I still feel some kind of vulnerability as I admit it.

“I still don't really know how to swim,” Peeta replies after a moment I realize was filled with some acknowledging reverence.

“I know,” I say quietly, giving him that same attempt at a smile and this time we both manage it at the same time. I walk a few paces around the lake's shore and find a gap in the trees were unobstructed sunlight touches down, warming the earth. Then I sit down, leaning back a little against the heels of my hands and nodding for Peeta to do the same if he wants.

He joins me after a moment and I notice that he's looking at me in the light with startling clarity, his gaze moving down until it falls against my stomach. I straighten a little and draw up my knees, tugging down at my shirt but finding that an extra fold of fabric bunches against my thin body. I'm not actually emaciated the way I got dangerously close to being at one point since we got home, but I'm not wearing the clothes that still hang in my closet that were from Cinna, tailored for the girl I used to be.

“I could teach you,” I decide quickly, looking up to Peeta's face and hoping to catch his eyes, to steal them away from my body.

“What?” he asks, startled.

“I could teach you how to swim,” I say more idly, hugging my knees and then leaning my chin against one of them.

“Are you sure--” Peeta starts to ask dubiously, looking out at the water contemplatively.

“I taught Gale,” I say quickly, cutting off any argument and staring out at the water, my face flushed with something I tell myself isn't shame. There's no reason for it to be, but I can't deny that there's a tightness in my stomach that no longer feels like confusion, really. Gale's gone, too, and I don't need him. When silence is what follows, I finally furtively glance over at Peeta and am relieved when I realize he hasn't become angry. Instead, I see him nod if only to himself and then shift to get back up to his feet.

“Okay,” he agrees as he offers me a hand I don't need to help me up. I get up on my own anyway, dusting my hands off on my pants and glancing at the water as I consider what I need to do. Again I've volunteered for something without thinking it through, without letting myself think it through because I can't stand the alternative. Now I've put Peeta's life in my hands again without any hesitation. For a moment all I can see in the water is the potential for him to sink beneath into the shadows provided by the trees. Even if I could get him back to shore, I don't know how to do the pressing on his chest, the kissing him that Finnick had known how to do to breathe air and life back into him. I simply can't let that happen. I can't let Peeta drown, can't let him die.

“You've got to do everything I tell you,” I insist when I face back to him, cementing my demand with a stern expression.

“Yeah,” Peeta agrees with some kind of dismissive reassurance, widening his eyes at me a little. “I know... I've got no idea what to do in water much deeper than a bathtub.”

I catch my breath and nod, first at him and then toward the water.

“Take off your clothes,” I tell him, not making eye contact as my hands go down to the bottom hem of my shirt. I realize too late that I hadn't really thought through the idea of distracting Peeta from looking at me. The only way I can get myself to proceed with taking off my shirt is steeling myself with as many layers of defiance as I can to remind myself why it shouldn't matter. As the fabric catches on my fingers and drags up across my stomach, I remember how I'd once tried everything to insist that I not take off Peeta's pants to examine and clean an almost certainly fatal wound. Now my body is scarred, lines running across it where surgeons have left marks where once different doctors had removed all traces of everything I'd ever touched, but Peeta has scars, too.

“What?” Peeta asks, breaking my resolve with a single syllable and causing me to quickly lower my shirt back down just as it had made its way midway up my abdomen. I look at him, nearly glaring but then realize that it's pointless. He hasn't suddenly grown shy or reprimanding or squeamish I gradually realize. He's just surprised, confused.

“... So the water won't drag. You're less likely to get hurt if you're not all weighed down.”

Peeta considers and smiles wryly.

“Just never thought I'd hear you say that to anyone.”

“You can leave your underwear on if you want,” I say calmly, having resolutely decided to keep mine on. There had been no secrets about my body between my stylists and me, but Peeta is different. He's seen me nearly naked quite a number of times and I think of the way my last arena outfit had torn. Only then does it occur to me that I've brought Peeta back to another shore, another beach, but even as I narrow my eyes at him I cannot imagine being the girl, him being the boy that had lost themselves to something I still can't name in one another's kisses. It just makes my skin flush and a lump of regret weigh on my chest and then my throat.

“Deal,” Peeta agrees and then he's pulling off his shirt and I decide to let mine join his at the same time. I get mine over my head just seconds after he's dropped his to the ground and then I'm glad I am wearing a real bra rather than simply wrapping my chest the way I had done before I'd ever gone to the Capitol. I'd owned one bra before then. When I hear my shirt fall down against his I look up for a second and catch him doing the same. I'm not sure if it makes it easier or harder, to have our knowledge of the state of one another's bodies become experience and reality. We don't approach each other and there's nothing said about it, but scarred we are but he's remarkably the same. I just momentarily let myself wonder if he thinks the same about me. Then under some silent agreement we look away from each other again, not quite making full turns toward the water as we both remove our shoes—it takes Peeta a little longer with his artificial left leg but not much anymore—and then our trousers join our shirts on the ground in a mingled pile.

The next time our eyes meet, I hurry over to the edge of the water, feeling the more coarse soil beneath my bare feet. I kneel down and brace myself for the feeling of water completely surrounding my body for the first time since the last arena and am helplessly reminded of Annie for a second. It won't be abrupt, though, or terrifying, to wade out into the water until it's deep enough to lose my footing. I look up when Peeta joins me and my eyes run along the complex artificial limb that he hardly seems to notice at all now.

“What do we do first?” he asks.

“Are you afraid of the water?” I ask, getting back up as I feel less compelled to curl my body in against itself.

“I'm afraid of drowning,” Peeta quips but he doesn't seem very nervous. He trusts me now. He's always trusted me, even when he shouldn't have, as long as he could remember that he wanted to.

“Don't be,” I demand, then let my expression soften, looking over at him less intensely as I swallow down the anger I feel at the suggestion. “I'm not going to let you,” I say more quietly. I reach for his hand again, a little less reluctantly than back in town, taking it gradually with my fingers. “First we need to get you used to the water. We can wade out for a little while, but let me keep a step ahead so I can feel for where it drops off,” I explain, taking the first two steps out into the water. I take a deeper breath, surprised at how cool it is on the warm day. Peeta follows me and I glance back and see his jaw tighten a little once we're deep enough for him to feel the water up to his right knee.

“Colder than you'd think,” he comments.

I look up at the canopy of trees that almost completely surrounds us and nod in that direction as I look back down to meet his eyes.

“Lots of shade and it's not really into the summer yet. We can go in a little faster,” I suggest with a bit more of a smile that I feel tightening my cheeks, almost instantly making them ache. “If you think it'll help.”

“You're the mentor,” he replies easily and for a second I wonder if I should give into the stinging the word causes. Haymitch isn't a mentor anymore and the word doesn't hold the same meaning it did in the world before. I guide Peeta a little further into the water, focusing on its rippling surface to keep him from noticing how my brow has furrowed. I catch our reflections anyway in the part of the water that's illuminated by our gap in the trees and I remember the way Finnick would joke about dying so easily with a rope, how it made us laugh. Laughing then might be one reason I'm alive, we're alive, today even though Finnick is gone. I frown a little more tightly and then all at once I'm letting myself smile again and nodding as I look back up. “Don't let yourself tense up. Your muscles cramping is one of the easiest ways to drown if you can't stand up,” I warn patiently.

Peeta nods and looks apprehensively further out into the lake, but he just tightens his grip on my hand. He trusts me.

He trusts me, so I take his other hand and feel my feet backward along into the lake, letting myself trust him a little, too. Sometimes I feel a tiny plant snap beneath my feet but my feet are tough enough for it to not cause me any real pain and when I'm confident about how far we can go back I try and get a little momentum to draw us both into the water about chest deep. The sound that's drawn abruptly from my mouth is a shrill gasp as the sensation of unexpected cold overwhelms me for a moment. I know I'm breaking the rule I just gave Peeta, my body tense as I try not to shiver, but we're both still firmly on foot. I open my eyes, letting them refocus on Peeta's face and he's grinning but his breath has quickened, too, and I think one of the reasons his teeth show with his smile if that he's trying not to chatter them.

“Try kneeling down,” I get out, leaning a little until I've bent at my knees and feel them knock his, the water rising higher against my body. Peeta follows my instruction and I can feel his body heat and then a faint indication of his heartbeat as I move my cautious grip up from his hand along his arm until I feel the firm muscles just beneath his shoulders. We search each other's eyes and then Peeta's teeth do chatter once and I'm breathing fast, but this time it's that same thing I had recognized earlier as an attempt to laugh. This time I try letting myself and a faint sound comes out and it's unfamiliar, foreign even, but it catches Peeta's attention as much as mine and he smiles in return. “It gets easier after a few minutes,” I try telling him, reminding myself as I find myself wishing that the rest of the water were as warm as I feel where my skin almost touches Peeta's.

He moves abruptly in the water and I flinch, but then he's just reaching for my hair, catching some of it that has come loose on the side opposite my braid that falls along the side of my face. He draws it out a little and examines it quietly before tucking it behind my ear, his hands a little less steady than they usually are. He's still trying not to shiver and so am I. I feel my eyelids closing when his damp fingertips brush against the dry skin of my ear, but I quickly try to just move past it and swallow down what I'm afraid might be sadness coming back again.

“The next thing you need to do is get out where your toes barely touch, and--”

“Katniss,” Peeta interjects, a soft plea. It catches me off guard so I stop and purse my lips to listen. “It's too cold,” he explains without delay, laughing softly without that broken hesitation.

“No, it's--” I try to persuade him gently but then my words catch because I'm breathing deeply again against the cool water. It's not warm enough to just get used to comfortably. Then I'm laughing too and run my hand up to his shoulder on his right only to lightly push. I don't push hard enough to let him go, though. Even though there's no danger, I'm not about to let him think there's any either. I don't want to frighten him and that's also when it's the worst for him, more likely that he'll forget for a while again and have to find some focus, some kind of pain to hang onto what's real. “Okay. We'll try again in June.”

Then I let go of him and wait long enough to make sure he's headed out of the water too and make my way back to the shore. At the edge, we both sit down and I still stubbornly try letting my toes dip into the water. I know that I could swim in it if I needed to, but the season hasn't warmed enough yet to teach Peeta. Peeta must read my expression as disappointment or something because he immediately tries to reassure me.

“I don't think I really need to know how to swim anyway,” he says.

“You should know if you ever--” I start to snap in reply but then I stop arguing and won't even let myself follow that thought through to conclusion. Peeta looks over at me expectantly but doesn't demand completion. Suddenly weary, I look behind us and move a little closer to the pile of our clothes and decide to let my skin dry a little before I put mine back on. I lie back against the ground, feeling grass against my back and the sun warming my skin. Peeta's eyes follow my movements and this time I don't try covering the network of scars on my skin or anything else, deciding that it really doesn't matter.

“Thanks for letting me come with you,” he says, taking a deep breath that isn't quite a sigh before he follows suit and lies down on his back. I wonder if he's disappointed somehow and about what before I realize that I am. There's an emptiness that settles into my chest again and I'm thinking of being back on shore, back on the edge of something I can't have anymore. I look across the space between us, the full width of the pile of our clothes. I've lain beside Peeta so many times now, shielded from nightmares and darkness by his arms, but the light of day somehow chases away his regained freedom to hold me and all at once I hate it.

“Peeta--” I start, not quite sure what I want to say. I'm not very good at saying something, not even when I need to desperately. His name gets his attention, though, and I lock eye contact with him and try and let it invite me in the way I'm certain he'd been trying too so many times before we lost so much, back when I couldn't see. I crawl the short space over to him and inch by inch settle into my place at his side, easing into the feeling of his skin's warmth the way I'd tried to ease into the water's cold.

“Katniss,” I'm answered when I feel him tensing again.

“Shh,” I try to insist, but then I realize that I'm in his space as much as I'm drawing him into mine. I lean against my arm and look down into his eyes and glance down his chest for a moment before I manage to ask. “Is this okay?”

Peeta nods and shifts to tentatively put out his arm for me and I lower myself down, even more drawn to lying beside him now that I have started to feel some sense of relief now that I've begun the slow, arduous process of working through countless seemingly impossible questions so painlessly. For the first time in a while, I'm too tired to resist a feeling so good as relief and I try tucking my head down against Peeta's damp chest, my ear pressed to the place were I can hear his heartbeat. He moves, though and grabs his shirt from the pile of clothes.

“Wait a second,” he instructs quietly, placing the soft fabric over his shoulder and one side of his chest. “It's dry,” he explains when I look at him with a slight frown. Agreeing to what I feel deeply, almost viscerally is a compromise, I nod and finally find the place against him where the old Katniss would have fit with the old Peeta, more than she ever knew. I can't get comfortable against the shirt, though. I let my arm extend over him, feeling his body heat move through me at each place where I can find contact. A breeze blows across the lake and I roll over slightly toward Peeta and he wraps his arm protectively around me. The real Peeta still wants to protect me. I look down at the color of his shirt and take a deep breath, smelling Peeta's skin on it and deciding that I'd rather see it, too, scars and all.

“Peeta, it's okay,” I tell him. Then I look up at his face and catch him looking quizzically at me. “It's okay,” I repeat. “We can still--” But then I stop talking, face flushing as I realize at least in part what I'm asking for and feel ashamed.

“... Katniss, what's wrong?” Peeta prompts, reaching up and touching the bottom of my damp braid, the way he had touched me before. “What are you talking about?”

I don't want to talk about it because I don't know what to say, so I pull back and think about moving away from him again but then remember something that had worked a long time ago. My lips press to his and I can't quite remember what to do. I'm not the girl who simply, clumsily did back on the beach. Instead, it's so unnaturally still for a moment that I'm not sure it counts as a kiss and that it might even be worse than the first time I'd tried for the cameras.

Then Peeta's hand moves from where he'd pinched the very bottom of my braid to the side of my neck where he steadies me gently and his lips move against mine in turn. His movements are tight, halting as my own, unfamiliar and learning how to do it again, even though it'd always come more naturally to him. After just a moment he tilts his chin down and breaks the contact. I can feel my breath mingling warm and damp with his but he doesn't try for my lips again and I don't know if I should start feeling an even deeper ache of regret. I don't know if we've lost everything as much as I thought he had.

“It's okay,” I plead this time. I'm answered with a light peck of a kiss against my lips that doesn't last at all and a nod that I can feel brushing against my own forehead.

“Yeah, Katniss. Of course it's... okay,” he says, once again taking for granted something that terrifies me a little. I nod and pull back enough to meet his eyes and he smiles at me and I do too. “... I just... don't know what you want, sometimes,” he apologizes, glancing down.

“Neither do I,” I say quickly, a little bitterly but then I realize this isn't the place, the moment for that. There actually is a time now for something else, something a little better. “... Stay with me,” I supply after a moment's searching my mind, the threatening hollow in my chest for the words. I grip at the fabric of his shirt with my fingertips but then realize that he can't feel the tugging and instead pull it back down to the ground beneath us. “Not just... when I have nightmares. When we walk through town or... anytime you need to, it's okay. Stay with me.”

Peeta examines my face so intensely that for a moment I wonder if he recognizes me at all and I have to look away.

“... Always,” he says, an echo and a reminder that he does remember. Then I can't look at him because I know my eyes are wet again but this time not because I'm sad or angry. Instead I press a kiss to his bared shoulder and another a little lower, water from the lake touching my lips. Another breeze blows across the water and over us and I hide from the cold against his body's warmth and feel his hand against the skin between my shoulder blades. When my eyes have stopped stinging, I press my cheek down against his chest, my ear down over his heart again, this time without the shirt between us.

“I'll teach you how to swim when it's warmer,” I insist.

“Yeah?” he prompts, sounding almost amused.

“Well I can't teach you to hunt,” I reply and realize I'm teasing. He laughs again, though I know it's not very funny.

“I'll teach you how to bake when we get back,” he offers, bartering.

“I know how to bake,” I argue, rolling toward him a little firmly and then back since I can't push him but he's undeterred.

“Knowing how to make bread isn't the same,” he teases and I can hear the smile in his voice.

“Fine,” I agree. “I'll let you teach me how to bake, or try. Later,” I try to appease him because I want him to be quiet. I hear him start to reply but I quickly hush him and turn my lips down to kiss lightly against his chest again. He starts to speak again and I sigh wearily and press another slightly more sure kiss to his mouth which he returns and I can feel him smiling against my lips. I wonder if he'd lured me into the kiss on purpose, but I decide I don't care as I break it again and feel my nose brush against the side of his. After a few more tentative, shared kisses I finally lie back down against his chest and he's content to be quiet so I close my eyes and let his heartbeat lull me half to sleep, not hidden away, cold in a cave but warm against his skin in the sunlight.

#everlark #thg fic #the hunger games #the hunger games fic #the hunger games book fic #prix op #prix writing

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