#her backstory is one of the heavier ones i'm sorry

[mintsturniolo]

i did what i had to (m.s)

bf!matt sturniolo x f!reader

warnings: blood... idk

a/n: unedited. ya'll i was literally bored and making breakfast and this little blurb popped into my head. idk. no backstory... for this fic so ya'll can choose what you think led to this. anyways working on my other stuff too 🤍

“Are you sure you’re not hungry?” Nick asked, getting Charli out of her thoughts.

“Huh?” Charli asked. “Oh. No, I’m good. Thanks.”

Chris joined Charli at the dinner table and gave her a small hug. “He’ll be home soon. I promise.”

Charli shrugged as she rested her head on the table. “I know. He’s just been acting so strange lately. I’m worried about him.”

Nick sat on the other side of his friend and rubbed her back reassuringly. Charli was about to say something when the front door opened. She looked up and gasped when she saw her boyfriend. Matt was covered in scratches and bruises as he stumbled into the kitchen. Blood coated his hands and ran down the left side of his forehead. His white shirt was no longer white and he seemed to be in pain as he gripped his side. “Holy shit. Matt what the hell?” Chris gasped. “What happened.

“I did what I had to,” Matt replied leaning heavily onto the dining room table. “No one followed me, right?” he asked, panic filling his voice.

Nick looked out the windows and shook his head. “No. Matt, what did you do? Who’s blood is that?”

“I can’t talk about this,” Matt muttered before stumbling into his bathroom and closing the door behind him.

Charli glanced anxiously at Nick and Chris before following Matt. She knocked on the door as she listened to her boyfriend’s heavy breathing on the other side of the door. “Let me in.”

The door clicked and Charli went into the bathroom to see Matt standing in the bathroom staring at his bloodied hands. He was shaking, his breathing getting heavier by the second. “What happened?”

“I dunno,” Matt stammered. “He came out of nowhere.”

Charli ran her fingers through Matt’s damp hair and sighed. “Let’s just get you cleaned up.”

Matt didn’t respond. He couldn’t stop staring at the blood on his hands. Charli snapped her fingers, finally getting her boyfriend’s attention. “That shirt is ruined. Let’s get that off okay?”

“Hmmmm,” Matt hummed.

Charli gently helped Matt pull off his shirt and gasped. Bruises covered his entire stomach and chest. Charli reached for a towel and soaked it in the sink before wiping the blood off Matt’s hands. She saw the relief in his eyes the second his hands were clean. “Matt, I have to ask. What did you do?”

Matt looked away, not wanting to think about what had just happened. Charli gently wiped the dried blood off Matt’s bottom lip. Matt inhaled sharply when Charli started to wipe the cut on his head. "Fuck. Charli that hurts," he muttered.

"I'm sorry baby. I have to get this clean," Charli sighed.

When she’d finished cleaning up, Matt took a seat on the edge of the bathtub, covering his face with his hands. Charli sat quietly beside him, resting her head on his shoulder. She didn’t know what to ask. “Matt,” she sighed. “Who was it?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Matt replied.

“It does,” Charli replied. “Look at you. You came in covered in blood and shaking. I thought you were going to collapse. You still look like you need a hospital. What did you do? What did they do?”

Matt got up and started to open the door when Charli grabbed his arm. “Matty. Please,” she begged. “How can you say it doesn’t matter?”

“Cause he’s dead,” Matt snapped, tears forming in his eyes. “I didn’t want to. I had no choice. I was protecting you.”

Taglist

@adirtylittleheart @sturniolo04 @yourenogoodforme @flouvela @mattyblover07 @sturnioloveniamh

[tollingreminiscentbells]

RoCS Side Story: Simon and Harry

Since people sometimes ask about Simon and backstory and things of that nature, I thought I'd deliver with a little bit of side content! Specifically, Simon and baby Harry meeting for the first time. A little shy of 1,000 words below the cut, if Harry's early childhood, and Simon's take on how to talk to toddlers, is of interest to you.

“I’m here to see the boy.”

The older woman currently responsible for the care of Harry Potter looks at Simon with extreme skepticism. Simon doesn’t blame her—he wouldn’t trust him, either.

“Harry,” he amends, because he knows he wouldn’t appreciate being referred to as the boy and, even if Harry isn’t present for this conversation, it’s the principle of the fucking thing.

She still looks profoundly unimpressed, but nods. The Dark Lord must have let her know Simon was coming, though he can’t imagine she was fully prepared to be confronted with a skinny twenty-year-old who hasn’t slept in almost thirty hours.

In hindsight, that might have been an error in judgment on his part.

“This way,” she says stiffly.

“Thank you,” he says, following her down the hall and up a flight of stairs.

Their destination turns out to be a small nursery on the second floor, just off the landing. And there, sitting in a crib under the window, playing with a stuffed dog, is the child the Dark Lord inexplicably thinks Simon is fit to raise.

“I’ll be back in fifteen minutes,” the woman tells him. She leaves the door open on her way out.

Simon watches her go, then turns his attention to Harry, who is watching him with fascination, the stuffed toy forgotten. They stare at each other for a moment and then Simon says, “Hello.”

Harry waves. “Hi.”

“Oh.” Simon blinks at him. “You can talk. Sorry, I didn’t realize.”

Harry giggles and says again, “Hi.” 

“Albeit with a somewhat limited vocabulary.” Simon crosses the room and folds his arms against the side of the crib. “I suppose you are only . . . how old are you?” He shakes his head. “I don’t know why I’m asking you, you’re a baby. Or are you a toddler? Is there a discrete point where one becomes the other?”

Every word that leaves his mouth is just more evidence that he has no business even being here. Of all the wizards in Britain, Simon Glass might be the last one anyone should entrust a small child to, particularly a small child as important as Harry Potter.

Said small child is stretching his arms in Simon’s direction. “Up.”

“You want out of the cage? I don’t blame you.” 

He’s never picked up a toddler before, but the principle seems straightforward enough and he reaches down to wrap his arms around Harry and lift him up and over the side of the crib. He’s heavier than he looks, but Simon doesn’t drop him and instead gets them both situated on the floor, so he’ll consider that a success.

The bar is so low he’d have to start tunneling to go any lower.

And then they’re back to staring at each other because of course they are. Simon has never felt more out of his depth in his life. This is worse than the day he got arrested.

“I don’t know what to do,” he admits quietly.

Harry tilts his head curiously, but Simon’s uncertainty might be affecting him because his face is starting to screw up like he’s going to cry. In a tiny, plaintive voice, he says, “Mama?”

Oh. Oh no.

But Harry really looks like he’s going to cry now, so Simon does the only thing he can think of: he starts talking again. “She’s . . . she’s not coming back, I'm sorry. Neither of them are.” He tries to smile and is very certain he fails. “My mother died a long time ago—I don’t remember her very well. I wish it had been the other way around and my father died first, but no one asked me.” He reaches out and brushes messy hair off Harry’s forehead. “No one asked you, either, did they? I suppose we’re alike that way.”

The talking strategy seems to be working because Harry is once more looking at Simon with some degree of interest, the tears held at bay. He makes a noise that isn’t quite a word, but Simon has spent most of his life not being understood by the people around him, so he nods. “Just so.” 

Harry smiles at him, which makes him quite possibly the only person who has ever found Simon remotely amusing, and Simon sighs. “I’m not cut out to be a parent,” he tells him flatly. “The house is horrible and I can’t cook. I don’t know anything about children. And there’s no one else, so you won’t even be getting a proper family out of the deal. This is a terrible idea and I don’t know why anyone would even entertain it.”

Harry holds out a hand and Simon takes it, watching as pudgy fingers curl around his index and middle fingers. It’s kind of sweet, actually. Reaching out to Simon like he’s in any way fit to be here, like Simon is someone he might conceivably be comforted by.

Perhaps the Dark Lord knew Simon better than he knows himself because there really isn't a decision to be made, is there? It was made the moment Simon walked in the door. Or maybe even sooner. The moment he agreed to meet Harry Potter at all. 

Harry is alone in the world now, but Simon has an idea of what that’s like and maybe . . . maybe that will be enough to get them started. A foundation he can build on, if he manages to keep them both alive long enough to try.

Looking into Harry's bright green eyes, he finds that he wants to try.

“I suppose I should introduce myself, shouldn’t I?” When Harry smiles again, he smiles back. “I’m Simon.”

[davekat-sucks]

So I was listening to Doctor on loop yesterday, as my autism oft commands me to do, and I think I had something of an epiphany in regards to what I like and don't about this stupid-ass webcomic which consumes my brain every once in a while.

I think the reason I like the first 5 Acts and am decidedly mixed on the last 2 (bar the very beginning of Act 6 where the Alpha Kids get introduced and their relationships are set up) is that, IMO, as it went on things stopped being about Sburb and the game itself??? If that makes any sense.

And even then, I kinda prefer Acts 1-4 to Act 5, as Act 5 began the cast bloat that became real bad midway into Act 6 with the A1 Trolls. Also Murderstuck, but that's a whole other writing hang-up I have involving character deaths, which HS both does and doesn't fall victim too.

Also, I think I know why I like most of the Pesterquest Sprites bar Terezi, Jane, and Roxy's. And just to preface, no, it's not that the former two are on the heavier side. Please, I am too IRL, but that's not the reason.

Okay fine, it's *kind of* the reason in Jane's case, but I digress.

In Jane's case, and this is also kinda the case for Roxy, I kinda feel as if she doesn't... mesh as well with the other Kids, if that makes sense. Like the actual way she's drawn and the shading and all. Also making her chubby when one of her main interests is baking smacks vaguely of stereotyping, and I'm not particularly a fan of it.

For Roxy, my main issue is that I feel the amount of detail, again, doesn't make her mesh with the others. Like, I feel she looks... oh god, I am going to get hate for this, aren't I?... Too definitively black??? Is that even a thing? Like the other kids are ambiguous, keeping with Hussie's BS about that being the case and not all the kids being white like is all but explicit in the comic itself. And Roxy isn't.

Terezi being heavyset I don't like because of her overly acrobatic fighting style. Yeah that's about it. I wouldn't mind it otherwise, but here we are.

I do like Vriska's sprites though. I think the way they're styled fit her personality and how she is. Her writing on the other hand...

(In particular the "You see a girl who did nothing wrong" bit. which. I'm sorry, but No. You can't say that while Sollux, Terezi, Tavros, and Aradia (at the least!) still have their canon backstories)

Oh right this blogs gimmick.... Uh, fuckin...

Aromantic-Asexual Karkat is better than DaveKat.

There. Plus as an Aspec guy myself, I kinda think it would be funny if the guy all about relationships didn't feel that kind of attraction. Irony, I guess.

Aromantic-Asexual Karkat is better than DaveKat.

[silent-moons-camp]

Got some Q's for Stigandr Tavrinth pls and thank you!

Random selected but I like these questions: (if it's too much sorry!!! got excited lol)

-What is your character's favorite physical trait they possess?

-What is something your character would refuse to wear?

-What is something your character is proud to own?

-Who would your character ask first if they needed medical help?

-Who would your character say knows them best?

-Where is your character's safe space?

Aaaa thank you! Love answering questions about Stigandr because he's still not fully developed yet and these questions help me make decisions about him. No need to apologize!!!

-What is your character's favorite physical trait they possess?

Stigandr takes GREAT pride in his beard and hair. This man is hairy as fuck and probably has a whole routine he goes through every morning to ensure it's perfect. Stigandr is not a vain person, but appearances are important when it comes to being a Paladin. He's gotta strike a balance of being intimidating enough to his enemies and approachable enough from those he seeks to protect. (Maybe there's some personal backstory regarding his affinity for braids. My friend has a character whose culture holds great importance on braids and their meanings, and I've been inspired by that since, lol.)

-What is something your character would refuse to wear?

I don't think he's actually too picky on clothing. I would say clothing of the enemy, but I did put him in some Absolute apparel when the gang infiltrated Moonrise. I suppose... maybe he wouldn't want to wear lighter armors? I mean he would if he had to, but he prefers heavier sets of armor that are more likely to protect him.

-What is something your character is proud to own?

He is VERY proud of the Amulet of Greater Health that he snagged from the House of Hope. Not only is it super useful, but he finds great pleasure in stealing from Raphael.

(Considering I play on Explorer difficulty and with a no party limit mod... this amulet feels like cheating, even moreso than usual lmao)

-Who would your character ask first if they needed medical help?

He would probably try to take care of the wounds himself first. He has his own healing spells, of course, but if he's unable or out of magic, he'd go to Shadowheart. Stigandr is a humble man who knows he needs to be in good health in order to help others and find a cure, so he doesn't dawdle when it comes to wounds. If Shads is unavailable, he'll go to Jaheira or Halsin.

(Also, of course he'd go to Shadowheart. The inherent eroticism of being healed by your love interest is too great to pass up.)

-Who would your character say knows them best?

I would say that my yet-to-be-created Dark Urge character knows him best. Stigandr is a werewolf, and so is this Dark Urge character I'm rotating around in my brain. I think the two have been traveling together for some time in search of a cure for their lycanthropy, and as such, the two become good friends (in spite of her murderous thoughts and bloodlust, lol). Obviously him and Shadowheart grow close and I would say she ends up as one of the people who know him best, and in ways that my Durge probably never would.

-Where is your character's safe space?

Stigandr finds himself most safe within nature, or within distance of a religious site. Stigandr is an Oath of Devotion paladin, yes, but he is a paladin of Tyr also. While he spent his early years in Baldur's Gate, he spent most of his young life in Fortress Faithful, the Church of Tyr in Tethyr. Nature also because he just finds it to be beautiful, and of course, because of lycanthropy. (Image nabbed from the Forgotten Realms wiki.)

Thank you for the ask!!! I had fun answering these and providing some images :)

Ask me questions about my OCs from this post!

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

Writerly Question Tag

Stealing this one from @leahnardo-da-veggie but leaving it under a cut because it's really long :D

I'm tagging @starlit-hopes-and-dreams @pleasestaywithmedarling @writingphoenix and @sarandipitywrites if you feel like doing it (there's a lot of questions :D) and also an open tag.

About You

When did you start writing?

I probably "wrote" before, but I remember wanting to write some huge fantasy epic when I was around 12-14. Spoiler: I did not, in fact, write a huge fantasy epic.

Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write?

I read more things than I like to write. I only write romance-adjacent darkish fantasy (is it slice of life if the char gets sliced), but I love reading murder mysteries, some more mainstream romance, and lots of YA and fantasy that are heavier on the plot than what I do.

Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you’re often compared?

I don't actively try to emulate anyone, but I sure keep picking up things left and right. But even when I read something great and think "wow, I wish I could write like this" it often would not fit "my" style, whatever that may be. The one time I actively tried to soak up things was from my dearest @alittlewhump <3

Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)?

There really is just once space, which is my desk, because I do not have a laptop and I will not write on my phone. Also, I never leave the house, so. (It's a mess, and with the exception of several character prints on the loft bed in front of the desk, the decoration is gaming oriented.)

What’s your most effective way to muster up some muse?

Hahahahhaaha. *sobs* Sometimes ridiculous deadlines and pressure work.

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about?

Absolutely. For example, I have never had real contact to anyone in my family outside parents/siblings/grandparents (and the latter are long dead), so I tend to forget that families can be bigger and most of my chars have exactly one sibling XD Also sorry y'all (nonspecific) are fed up with the generic western european fantasy world with deciduous forests, snowy winters, and castles, but *looks around* yeah.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all?

Loneliness. Looking for a place to belong. Never being enough. Trying to figure out wtf love is. Haha. I am super surprised.

Your Characters

Would you please tell me about your current favorite character? (Current WIP, past WIP, never used, etc.)

We all know it's Damien, don't we? 😔 I can't just write like 300k words about a guy going through hell and back without loving him. He's perfect. Traumatic backstory. Lowkey morally gray even though he has such a good heart. He gets the pain, and the asexuality, and the self-hate, and the cool sparkly magic. For my active projects, there's Riordan, my aro-allo, ridiculously positive mercenary guy who has no manners - I really, really want to make him despair and cry for once. And there are Ross and Irina, and it's impossible to have one without the other, but I can't even say much about them yet, because they're still developing (we gotta get them out of the torture dungeon so they can have a personality.)

Which of your characters would you be friends with in real life?

Probably Merridy. I wish I could show her video games. It's a fantasy story and you can play it yourself? Sign her up. It would be hard not to be friends with Riordan, though.

Which characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

Except for all the bad guys, I think Lily would be too exhausting for me. Not so much dislike, just please get your early bird extroverted energy over there while I remain over here.

Tell me about the process of coming up with your characters?

I have a vibe, and that vibe grows arms and legs. Sometimes even a regular amount. By the time I put the char on (digital) paper for the first time, I know very little about them other than a few bullet points. They develop together with the story.

Do you notice any reoccurring themes/traits in your characters?

Asexuality. I have to force myself to write an allo char, and even then ... XD I also probably need a guide on how to write neurotypical chars, sometimes I look at one and am like... "oh no, not you, too." And almost all of them like books :D

How do you picture your characters?

I do not. (Aphantasia gang rise up.) I create portraits for them in the game I play, which works ok-ish. It doesn't have great options, but I'm stuck with it, because I have most of them as characters I play.

Your Writing

What’s your reason for writing?

I have to. There's things in my head. They need to leave.

Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers?

To be frank, I write about things that will alienate a lot of "normal" readers, be it the violence, the queerness, or disabilities. It means a lot to me if something like that resonates with someone, because if I don't reach that audience the only one that's left is the one that asks "but why would you include X, ew :/"

How do you want to be thought of by those who read your work?

While I wish my work to be perceived, I do not wish to be perceived myself.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I uh. Write. By which I mean, I don't need anything to start. No outline, no moodboard, nothing but 3 vibes in a trenchcoat and some random thought I had a few months ago. Sometimes I get stuck and lose interest, but I have a couple of finished works, so I'll keep going like that for now.

What have you been frequently told your greatest writing strength is by others?

I have no idea, but it's not prepositions.

How do you feel about your own writing?

It's good enough. (Except for the prepositions.)

If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write?

Probably. I mean, I hate writing by hand, so depends on how long electricity is running without any other humans around, but that's not the question, is it. I'm not sure it would take the same shape as it does now, if I never publish, I don't need to stress myself with the deadline of edits, but I would still have to put it all down, because I HATE when I forget my daydreams 😭

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy?

I mostly write what I want to read myself, but I would be lying if I didn't admit that I have added things multiple times in the past thinking "oh, I know who would like that". To be clear, that's not talking about an "audience", that's my dearest friends who could go for a little impalement or medieval execution :) Sometimes it's also "you know what we need more of?" posts, but let's be honest, none of those people will ever read it. I just happen to agree with them. On the other hand, I have censored myself in the past because I was afraid what others will say. It's great sitting on every single fucking squick list out there. Lastly, there's also that issue where sometimes, I want to write something, but the story develops in a way that it doesn't end up fitting, and while I am sad, I will bow to the will of the story.

[thestylesfamilysblog]

Take A Breather

Elodie Styles x Harry Styles

synopsis: the end of the semester hasn’t been easy on Elodie, and a few things are starting to weigh on her heavier than usual…

warnings: slight angst, insecurities, mentions of harassment, sad Elle

a/n: I wanted to write some backstory to the other day when Elle went missing, idk why I just felt like doing a little something and I haven’t written anything in a whole for her older self so why not!

The second year at Harvard had gone by fairly fast, truth be told Elodie had blocked out most of the year. It had never been this hard before but she was struggling to find her place within the university, of course she had a small group of friends and Teddy but when you weren't in the same program, sometimes finding time to get together was hard.

Elle really only had herself to blame in a sense, she'd gone from wanting to go out and get dinner on friday nights with friends, to just going home and keeping to herself in her room. It wasn't as if she was totally miserable, no she had a beautiful life, amazing family and an even more amazing boyfriend.

It had happened a few weeks ago in a lecture, Teddy was friends with everyone, his laughter and humour contagious, it didn't surprise her to hear people boast about him, especially the girls that sat near her in Romance Literature on Wednesday mornings. Normally she was a pretty confident girl but the more she listened to their conversation the more she almost felt undeserving of her spot in Teddy's heart.

To top off the current storm brewing in her head, she was also dealing with a teachers assistant that took any chance he could to make inappropriate comments, and ruin her work before her professor had a chance to view it, causing her to quickly need to redo it and submit it herself every time.

She just wasn't feeling her best, and after the fight with Elijah she just wanted to be alone. In hindsight maybe letting someone know where she was would have been a good idea, but all she wanted was a space to just be alone and let a bit of the weight off her chest.

-

Elodie had found this little cafe in first year, just a mere few blocks from Harvard's campus, no one ever came here, she and the owner becoming good friends, an elderly lady, Joanne, always happy to see her.

It must have been around 3 hours of her just sitting, trying to journal like her dad taught her, a few tears here and there, but the warm blueberry matcha was helping her keep it as together as she could.

Meanwhile Harry and Ro had been frantically searching for her with the help of their friends, it wasn't much longer that Harry had pulled up outside the cafe just as shed been walking out, the only person she could think to tip her father off would have been Teddy.

"Jesus Elle you scared the shit out of me.."

His voice wasn't filled with anger or animosity, more worry and a care only a father feels towards their child

"I'm sorry dad..I just-I'm sorry" she answered back softly, tears still being held back which only brought a frown to Harry's face

"Come here.."

Pulling her into a hug she began to cry, her hands gripping onto his coat as if he'd get ripped away from her

"Oh Elle...what's going on?"

"I need a break.."

Harry furrowed his brows before guiding her to get in the front seat of his range rover, the heat helping to warm her now cold hands up. He was quick to join her, remaining parked but turning his attention back to her

"What do you mean a break?"

"I-I'm not happy in school...Im struggling in one class where the TA is horrible to me, I feel so disconnected and alone from everyone, I just I'm not happy dad...and I feel like im not good enough for bear.."

At the sound of her voice breaking he sighed, grabbing her hands and holding them gently

"Well first things first, if you need a break then take one my darling, defer a semester, a year, whatever you need, mum and I will support you, I'll even look into getting the TA fired"

"Dad, the school didn't do anything.."

"So? I'll make them do something, no one messes with my baby girl and gets away with it right?"

He waited until Elodie nodded before speaking up again

"Now, why are you feeling so down about bear, has he said something?"

She shook her head

"No, he's perfect in every way, it's me...I just I feel like I'm not good enough for him, the girls I see talk about him are so beautiful and I guess I don't know I just feel so insecure and its nothing to do with him...its all me..."

Harry went to speak until Elodie sniffled and continued

"He's so perfect to me, and he loves me so much...I can be myself around him and he's everything and im just me...I feel like I just don't deserve his love...and I have never felt like this about anyone before, im just scared I'll lose him"

Harry could understand where she was coming from, it was hard to be a girl growing up, he'd had his fair share of insecurities himself and he only wished he could take all of these negative feelings away from her

"Well for one, you are enough, you always have been and you deserve every ounce of love Teddy gives you, i've seen that boy with you, he looks at you like you hung the moon and stars. I know sometimes with other girls it can be hard and you compare yourself to them but I promise you, Elle you are beautiful inside and out, and I hate to hear you think any less of yourself."

Harry knew it might not have fixed everything but it was enough to have her nodding, a small smile creeping up on her face. Harry knew Elodie would get another good talk with her mother that same night but for now he did the one thing he could think of to cheer her up.

Milkshakes and a drive filled with her favourite music, just like they used to when she was a little girl.

[geekordaus]

Ok, time for Katherine's backstory:

Masterpost

Katherine is the daughter of one of the most famous Superheroes couple of Empirestown. So she has been under a lot of pressure from them for her to become a hero too, thing that she does.

Her power is plant manipulation, well, when she can control them, cause when she looses control, another power manifest, life energy absorption. A power that has provoked a few accidents throughout the years, accidents that have make her parents somewhat disappointed of her.

It all goes relatively well for a time, until a battle with the WRA happens, battle in which, an interaction with Paradox's (Pearl) powers, makes her cursed powers to become more problematic.

After the battle, her inhibitions become... weaker, impulsive thoughts that appeared during her power outbursts, become stronger, her morals start to shift, and all the resentment against her parents, becomes heavier.

"No!" She thinks "This cannot get me..." In an alleway she finds a bike. "I'm sorry." She presses her hand, and a vine crushes the bike. She laughs- "No!" She runs out of the alleway.

A few months passes, where she commits some acts of vandalism in her hero hours. That is enough to satisfy her new thoughts, right?

One day, she is contacted by non-other than Queen Bee (previously known as Flame)

"I have see your little acts of vandalism, and how you get enjoyment out of them." Queen Bee aaus to her ear, in the top of a building. "Isn't it fun to let your destructive needs come out. To not be bound by all that moral nonsense?"

"I-i-- No! I mean... mayb-- I don't know." Katherine said. "I still want to be a hero, to help people, but..." She smirked. "Committing crime really sounds fu-" She slapped herself. "No, that's wrong."

Queen Bee smiled, and extended her hand. "Come with me, and I can help you have the best of both worlds"

Katherine looked at her hand. She hesitated a bit, hovering her hand over hers. Until she finally accepted the offer, and reached Queen Bee's hand.

A week passed, and a new villain appeared in the city, Spree. Curiously she only was active the days when Fairy Queen isn't active.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Hi! I hope you’re doing well. This spring most of my peers are graduating college and the fact that I have yet to start (or even decide if I want to go) has me feeling like a total failure. I could really use recommendations for your favorite lighthearted/fun romances. Thank you!

I'm sorry that you're feeling down. Honestly, take this time to think really hard about it and don't conform to what seems "right", do what's right for YOU. College was always a given to me--I "had" to go, even though it was basically entirely up to me to pay for it... and I did, with some scholarships but mostly loans, and now I'm in massive debt with a degree I didn't really think through (however much I loved what I studied) because I was 17 and had basically zero guidance and felt obligated to begin college ASAP.

I also had a total mental breakdown during my first semester and had to take over a year off before I was ready to go back. I still graduated, and though I have regrets about not thinking through the money and major stuff, I did genuinely enjoy my college experience after I went back. I think I would've enjoyed it even more if I'd taken time to decompress and figure my brain out. So sincerely, no pressure, no rush, in terms of timelines you can do this at any point. One of my favorite classmates was in her 60s.

ANYWAY. Soapbox over, I've got you!

Generally, I would recommend Tessa Dare if you want a fun historical romance. Some of her books do deal with heavier topics--from what I recall, The Wallflower Wager touched on childhood sexual abuse, and that's the heaviest one I think I've read from her. But if you want to try her out, read A Week to be Wicked--it's fun, it's a road trip, the hero makes an amazing joke about the heroine being a sword swallower... And they're really hot. I also love When A Scot Ties the Knot, Any Duchess Will Do (though heads up, this one does discuss the loss of a child) and basically the entire Spindle Cove series.

Talia Hibbert has some really fun contemporaries. Her Brown Sisters trilogy is great; usually they touch on serious topics like mental health and chronic pain while not getting TOO heavy. Act Your Age, Eve Brown may be my favorite--it's light enemies to lovers and both leads are on the autism spectrum. There's a scene where he finds her dildo that's both hilarious and hot?

Alexis Hall is HYSTERICAL, and I would super recommend Something Fabulous and Something Spectacular, his historical romcoms. The first one is a m/m road trip romance where this stuffy duke proposes to a woman horribly, she goes on the run, and he has to track her down with her sparkly fun twin brother... who he falls for... Something Spectacular has a nonbinary genderfluid lead try to help her ex get the attention of a famous castrato soprano, only for the soprano to notice her rather than her friend. These books are literally laugh out loud reads for me.

Heated Rivalry and The Long Game by Rachel Reid. M/m hockey romances, light enemies to lovers--these two dudes are the biggest hockey rivals in the league, but they've been secretly hooking up since their rookie season. Hot, romantic, emotional. It does deal with themes of homophobia and internalized homophobia and there is some "can we make this work" angst but it's really such a lovely and loving duet. It makes me SO happy, and they're two of my top "pick me up" reads.

Annika Martin's The Billionaire's Wake-Up-Call-Girl!! Such a fun contemporary romcom, but it's also sexy? The heroine is supposed to set up wake up calls for the billionaire CEO of her company, but she fucks it up and can't afford to lose her job, so she does them herself and he really likes her caustic attitude and doesn't realize she's an employee, so they get... dirty? It's so frothy and fun. The next book in the series, Most Eligible Billionaire, is also fun and light, but the heroine does have a backstory involving attempted SA that's heavier, so heads up. Aside from that, it is ridiculously funny.

A Witch's Guide to Fake Dating a Demon by Sarah Hawley if you're open to paranormal. A witch who's supposed to have untold power accidentally summons a demon who needs to collect her soul, and they enter into a stalemate that does involve fake dating. Hot, also?

The Queer Principles of Kit Webb by Cat Sebastian. Local lord needs to steal a special book from his evil dad, so he tries to hire a retired highwayman who's like "fuck no but I'll teach you how to do it". They fall in love. So funny but also emotional; Kit (the highwayman) is desperately besotted while Percy (the lord) is like "UGH I CANNOT HANDLE YOUR EMOTIONS".

Georgie, All Along by Kate Clayborn is a great "I am stuck in life and need to figure shit out" book about a 28-year-old who returns to her small town after losing her job as a celebrity's personal assistant. She uncovers this notebook where she wrote all her hopes and dreams as a young teen, and begins to try to live them out with the help of the older brother of the guy she had a crush on (and of course, he's a former bad boy).

Praise by Sara Cate, if you want an adventurous contemporary that has some angst but nothing super heavy? The heroine is 21 and recently broke up with her cheating boyfriend. She goes to his estranged dad's place to pick up the rental deposit the bf owes her, and the dad.... who is 40... thinks she's one of the girl's sent to audition for the role of his professional (not inherently sexual) submissive? And she thinks being told to kneel on the floor is just something he's doing for a bit so she does it and LIKES IT? And he realizes who she is and is like FUCK but feels bad so he hires her as his (platonic, super professional) secretary? And he is the partial owner of a sex club?

Never have I read a book where I felt more "God I wish that was me", I won't lie. The whole series is very good, explores some deeper topics but isn't SUPER heavy.

The Nanny by Lana Ferguson is a contemporary about a woman who takes this nanny gig working for a hot single dad chef... only to find out that he used to be a huge fan of her on OnlyFans. Hot and light and I liked it A LOT.

I also would sooo recommend India Holton's Dangerous Damsels trilogy. I love them all, they're hilarious and romantic and have a great world of flying pirates and witches and spies.

[lesamis]

have you watched the second season of shadow and bone? what are your thoughts?

oof, anon, i hope (and honestly kind of expect) that my opinion on this isn't given any weight at all. i'm genuinely not invested enough in the books or the show or the fandom to really have the right to voice much of an Opinion, but i did watch season 2! it made me feel a million different ways, but mostly it didn't make me feel anything, which still bothers me.

there's a special kind of frustration to watching something that you're convinced has the necessary ingredients for a good show, but simply doesn't land with you. i talked my long-suffering friend's ear off trying to figure out what that was as we were watching. what i ended up understanding is that if a studio wants to target as broad an audience as possible with an adaptation, they have literally no incentive to prioritize depth over breadth. combining two fundamentally different book series - both of which come with very large character casts and a ton of plot baggage! - was always going to be a bad choice from a storytelling perspective. the second season kind of drove home to me just how far they were taking the commitment to trying to preserve every storybeat despite having a cast far too large to do heavier plotlines justice, and having a timeline that doesn't accommodate some of the slower developments that made emotional beats land in the books.

what you end up with is a very well-designed (oh the embroidery!) and well-cast (daisy head emmy when!) show that dips into complex and worthwhile characters in the most shallow way possible. inej has one of the most horrific backstories in canon, and the lynchpin of her trauma is taken off the playing field in the blink of an eye to advance a different storyline. a character arc like hers, or genya's, deserves space and resonance. if you got up to get a drink twice throughout the show at the wrong moment, you could have literally missed the resolution of both, that's how little space they take up. given how good these actors' performances are, and how much affection there clearly is among the cast and crew for the project, the lack of substance in the storylines you can actually see in the show makes me feel a bit jaded and cynical.

very sorry to go off on a tangent there, anon! i'm not sure i gave you a very uplifting answer. the blowing-out-of-proportion of adaptations for the sake of hedging every possible bet was a sore point for me in the rings of power last year as well, so consider all of the above as a personal shortcoming much more than like, an Intelligent Critical Assessment :')

[monsterslament]

I would like to preface this by saying that I haven't seen Jigsaw or Spiral so if this was explained in either of those, I didn't see it.

Amanda Young was cleared as a suspect in Det. Kerry's death because, according to the investigators, Amanda wouldn't have been strong enough to lift Kerry into the angel trap. Hoffman was behind that one.

So it's implied later on that Amanda is the one that attacks and kidnaps Adam from his apartment. But Adam lives in an upstairs apartment. If Amanda supposedly wasn't strong enough to pick Kerry up, she definitely wasn't strong enough to carry Adam down a flight of stairs.

It's possible that she got help from John with that part, but the thing that bothers me is they never said who the second apprentice was. There's no rigid timeline set, so I suppose it's possible that they kidnapped Lawrence first, then went back for Adam later.

Like I said, this might have all been cleared up in another movie, but I haven't seen those and I wanted your opinion :)

I think for Kerry's death it's implied that Hoffman lifted her as he was already working as an apprentice. In i think saw 5 or 6 (maybe even 7 I forgot) they show flashbacks to John and Hoffman together watching either the razor wire trap guy or the the candle and the safe guy, both from saw 1. that gives us the context that Hoffman's been working with John for the majority of the jigsaw case, probably coming in right after John convinces Amanda to an apprenticeship.

Carrying someone down a flight of stairs isnt as hard as carrying someone up them. you just push them down yk. but you can just. kind of drag them behind you as you walk down? so there isn't too much heavy lifting there. Lawrence was taken to the bathroom second (as seen in either saw 2 or 3). and since Adam was living alone and not making much money it's very likely he was underweight. John was still somewhat healthy in saw 1, as we flashbacks later on that show him standing and lifting heavier things, ect. also the scene in saw 1 where it displays his agility during the confrontation with sing and tapp.

I also haven't seen jigsaw or spiral, partially because jigsaw messes up the timeline and reworks John's backstory in a way that doesn't make sense to the other 7 films. I've heard a lot of good about spiral and I still want to watch it but I don't have the time right now :( sorry for answering this late bc I was. busy. last night but!! I'm here now :)

[chaoticspacefam]

Saarai for love headcanons?

The other twin and my unashamed new favourite, I could talk about her all day tbh! Thank you for asking! :D

From this ask game: [x]

Trigger warning: brief mention of past trauma/assault (I guess, I’m never sure what to tag it as but I think thats the best thing to call it), emotional manipulation and gaslighting in the fourth and third-from-bottom question(s) - regarding past relationships and effect on current ones. Nothing is described in detail but it is mentioned, so if this is triggering or otherwise upsetting to you please skip that part or this ask/answer entirely. I won’t be offended, and because of this I’m gonna toss the text under a read more just as an extra precaution, stay safe! <3

Everything else is pure unadulterated fluff to make up for everything else bad I’ve/they’ve done to her tho :’3

When they discover they’re got a crush: Fully embraces it and rolls with it, she’s a romantic at heart (and also needs to go to horny jail a fair bit of the time), crushes are a wonderful, exciting thing to her. Daydreams a lot. Will give it a go and test the waters nearly immediately (depending on some factors ofc), but backs off equally as quickly if they seem uncomfortable or otherwise uninterested by her advances.

How they confess/hint: Makes quite the nuisance of herself, always popping up to check on them, wanting to sit near/be around them, chatters about anything and everything she can think of, plenty of flirting including anything from more chaste compliments on things she likes about them, to subtle and/or not-so-subtle innuendo at times, depending on what they’re most receptive to.

Big gestures of love: Cuddles (she can be the clingiest lover known to the galaxy and her octopus arms are inescapable XD) and/or kisses, even if it doesn’t lead to the bedroom, long walks together, picnics in the wilderness, listening to each other and talking things out (whether to do with their relationship or something else that either one is struggling with and needs support for, and this goes both ways), sitting quietly when they don’t feel like talking “just so she knows they’re there”, falling asleep together

Little gestures of love: Flirty banter, inside jokes, pet names, stroking or playing with her hair (she purrs and leans into it like a cat, her partners like to joke that she’s a “Cathar trapped in a Pureblood’s body” because of this), silly “arguments” over whose turn it is to do the chores (though she sulks when she loses and her partner insists on doing said chore(s) instead of letting her do them XD), tucking their head under her chin when they cuddle

How to win their heart: Be honest, respect for boundaries, communication, communication, communication, including calling her out on her shit if she says or does something that upsets/bothers them and be clear about what (so she can fix it and hopefully not repeat whatever it was a second time)

How to break their heart: Lie to her, or try to manipulate her for your own gain. No respect for boundaries she tries to set and trying to push her into something she doesn’t want, or even letting her do that to you because you weren’t brave enough to say something - she wants you to tell her these things, she’ll never be angry if you tell her “no”, no matter what or when, but she will be heartbroken if she finds out she did something that hurt you because she didn’t pick it up and you didn’t tell her it was hurtful.

Tiny little turn-ons: subtle little touches like a hand on her knee under the table, flirty banter again,  sideways glances and holding eye contact for a moment before looking away and pretending it was accidental, tracing patterns across her knuckles or the back of her hand while she holds theirs, dancing closer together than is necessary just to have as much contact between them as possible

Big turn-ons: Husky voices, even if you’re only saying her name, fingertips or kisses brushed along her jaw spurs (if she’ll let you touch them), nips/nibbles between kisses, whispered or purred words against her skin, leaning in for a kiss only to pull away at the last second and make her go to them instead

Things that make their heart flutter: Standing up for yourself, even if it means yelling at her when she’s being stupid (and sometimes especially then), coming to her defence when you think she needs it, seeing someone she cares about genuinely happy and enjoying themselves for whatever reason, excitement when talking/telling her about their favourite thing

Their type: Shorter than her, reserved and soft-spoken but also able to hold their own when it’s necessary. Playful and open to joking around and bantering (without being hurtful about it)

Ideal date: Anything at all. She’s not fussed as long as she’s with someone she loves. It can literally be “sit on the sofa and eat takeout”, as long as they’re together it’s perfect. For something lighthearted and “fun” while still going out, a karaoke bar will always be a hit. ;)

Past relationships:

Ty’s father, Tsâhis: In both verses/renditions, though not her first experience with a man, he was her last physically intimate one, and her first experience with a long-term relationship. Unfortunately it was not a good one. Without going into too much detail about it: he was emotionally manipulative, pushy, gaslit her constantly and  essentially blackmailed her to keep her in the relationship so he could trick as much information as he wanted out of her, he didn’t care about her at all, only about what she could give to him and about the fact he could boast that he had a pretty lady on his arm that would do whatever he asked her to do. It ended very badly when she finally realized that wasn’t what real love was and tried to leave him and he tried to kill her so she couldn’t leave and . She fought back and survived (obviously), but it’s left her with a lot of emotional (and physical - most of the scars on her body and the main one on her lip come from that struggle) scarring.

Xerid Ferral: exclusive to the Zephyrverse AU, as they wouldn’t cross paths in Subterfugeverse. Xerid was the alternate Wrath for that verse/timeline and Saarai’s only other long-term relationship (other than Tsâhis) before Sash. While it wasn’t toxic like Tsâhis was, it was certainly unhealthy due to being fairly one-sided. Saarai loved Xerid but, although she was loyal to Saarai because of her family name and her connection to D’leah, the feelings were not reciprocated and Xerid viewed the relationship very much as “I’m protecting you because I swore an oath to do that but the sex is just a bonus and there aren’t any emotional feelings attached”. Xerid later dies to protect Saarai and Vano during a fight so that ends the relationship and after grieving for a while she starts getting closer to Sash and eventually ends up with her, although if Xerid had lived they would have again gone their separate ways (though more amicably) once Saarai and Sash met, because Sash is able to give Rai the kind of relationship she wants and Xerid wouldn’t have held that against her either.

Various other one-night stands, all women, and none particularly worth mentioning. She never trusted any of the others enough to stick with them longer than needed to scratch an itch.

How they might affect current relationships: Tsâhis in particular has had quite an effect on her relationships, because of the things that happened on that night, she just can’t be intimate with men, it’s not something she’s comfortable ever doing again after that. In fact it takes her a long time to trust men as anything other than an acquaintance, much less romantically; Koth becomes an exception to this as thanks to his easygoing and empathetic nature and the fact that he never pushes her into anything she doesn’t agree to, she does end up trusting him and developing quite a deep emotional bond with him. It took her a long time (and in fact the party in the cantina at the end of KOTFE is the first time she really starts to properly relax around him and the first time she’s comfortable doing typical “couple-y” things with him like holding hands or cuddling up with him)  and although they’re never physical in that way, in some ways she’s a lot closer to Koth than she is to Lana because he’s just easier to talk to about those sorts of things.

It affected her relationship with Sash in the Zephyrverse AU too, though not quite as extensively because Sash is a woman, but there were a lot of times early on in their relationship where Saarai overreacted to simple little gestures or touches because of a flashback and they both had to learn to adapt to that; Sash had to learn what was and wasn’t okay, Rai had to learn to trust Sash and realise that she wasn’t trying to hurt her. They do eventually get through it together, but it was a big challenge for them in the beginning <3

‘Goals’ in a relationship (marriage, kids, a house, etc): Marriage is a nice end goal, but what’s most important to Saarai is a healthy relationship built on mutual trust (both when together & apart, she’ll worry and she understands they will worry about her too, but there shouldn’t be unhealthy levels of suspicion or distrust) and regular communication.

Any other love headcanons: Always says “I love you” to her partner(s) before they a) separate for different missions or b) go into battle, just in case she or they don’t come back and it’s the last thing they ever remember her saying to them.

[ranalatus]

In a House, Not a Home

The city of freedom's winds are suffocating

You learned this the hard way, and Diluc and Kaeya had to accept it no matter how much harder it is

spoilers - Diluc and Kaeya Backstories (mostly just Diluc)

genre: angst, platonic

characters: diluc, kaeya, jean, ragnvindr sibling GN!reader, implied venti

warnings: reader gets a few wounds and scrapes but nothing too bad, reader hates mondstadt

notes: hello i'm back and with angst :DD this work is mostly inspired by me scrolling through the platonic genshin x reader tag, but specifically its based off of @kazewhara's diluc and kaeya younger sibling fic autophobia, so inspiration credits to faer!

(sorry if the mention bothers you, and if you feel uncomfortable please tell me so I can remove it!)

The title is derived from the song Brother by Madds Buckley

Mondstadt isn't the same anymore

After that day, after the past few years

You walk through the lonely roads of Mondstadt, once the city you had so much pride for as a child of the Ragnvindr house, now just the source of all your miseries

How long has it been since your brother had come home?

How long has it been since you avoided your adopted brother's gaze?

How long has the air and wind you used to love so much felt like poison in your lungs?

You stop in a secluded corner near the Knights of Favonius headquarters, staring at the training grounds with an empty gaze

In the past, you and your brothers would train there all day. You'd all make bets on who'd win a spar, and you'd laugh as you and Kaeya bantered about who would gain their visions next after Diluc

It was a childhood filled with hope, with love, with family

It was a childhood that seems like but a distant dream in another worldline

Maybe, in that other worldline, you and your brothers are still a trio

Maybe, you still had family, at least

Maybe, you still had freedom

Ever since Diluc's departure, a part of your life became a pre-written destiny. To take over your family's business, to decide what to do with your father's belongings, to be thrust with responsibilities your free-spirited mind was just not ready for

Your life became a novel with chapters among chapters of events that already existed, but still has yet to happen

The city of freedom became the shackles binding you to the suffocating pressure of the world. And eventually, the city you used to love became the city you hated the most

When the fight happened, how many times did you pray to the Anemo archon?

When your father died, when Diluc left, what did the Knights of Favonius do for you and your family?

When the streets of Mondstadt became riddled with rumours and gossip spread like dandelions, didn't the wind only help deliver those words further?

You grew a hatred for everything you've ever loved. You grew a hatred for the winery, a job you never wished to work for. A hatred for the Knights of Favonius, the place where you met all the people you cherished. A hatred for the city you grew up in and the archon you were raised to always believe in

You grew a hatred for your brothers, who threw away years worth of siblinghood and left you all alone in the biting cold of the wind

In a way, you ended up exactly like those brothers you hated the most

And that realization hurts

The tears fall from your eyes faster than you can collect yourself. You hurriedly turn away from the training grounds, pulling your hood further down your face after realizing the wind pushed it back before quickly dashing back to the house you no longer call home

Unaware of the gazes stuck on your retreating figure

Jean sighs at the scene not unfamiliar to her. You often visit during the nighttime, when her workload gets heavy and she has to work overtime. The sight of you only makes her heart heavier. Always, she's wondering how to make things right between you three again, especially as your childhood friend

Her eyes land on the one watching the same scene as her. His expression is just as cold as his vision

Her tongue darts to her lips, trying to find the right words not as the Acting Grandmaster, but as Jean, his childhood friend

“It's not too late to repair your relationship, you know?” Her words don't work

Maybe it's because the childhood Kaeya that Jean knew died during the fight with Diluc

Kaeya stares, and that's all he ever does in that room. He stares at the spot where you cried. He stares at the training ground that held dear memories for the part of him that no longer existed

And he leaves the room without uttering a single word

How cruel of the Acting Grandmaster to summon him there under the pretext of urgent business, only to show him the sight he dreaded to see the most

His hand grazes the cryo vision hanging from his belt. He catches it in his grasp, and clutches it tight

A few days later at the winery, you are doing the exact opposite

The anemo vision that shines on your window ledge is a curse

It's a mockery from the heavens, from the gods who witnessed your life and from those who know you detest everything related to the city of freedom that shackles you

Of course. Right as you decide to run away from everything Mondstadt related, you were blessed by yet another shackle. Another chain with too many locks and too little keys

Is the Anemo archon messing with you? You glare hard at the vision. Then, you pick it up from the window ledge and throw it away as far as you can

No, you will no longer be bound by anything relating to this damned city of freedom. You will no longer be a character of this unhappy novel

You sit on the ledge, grabbing onto the wooden bars of the walls. Then you move your feet until you feel a barrel

While still clutching onto the wooden bars of the outer wall, you carefully climb down the stacked barrels of wine. You wince multiple times at the splinters that enter your hand, but you ignore them for the sake of finally, finally leaving the suffocating winery

Only, you misstep

And you land right on your back, the wind brushing past your figure as you fell, as if the god of freedom himself was laughing at you

“Fuck..” You curse under your breath. The splinters on your hands hurt and— you hurriedly look up —the barrels are falling

You barely manage dodge the avalanche of wine barrels, your heart rate picking up as the sound draws attention from the maids and workers still awake in the dead middle of the night

A corner of the wooden barrel grazes your ankle, but the only thing registering in your mind is that you need to run

And so, that's what you did. For the first time in four years, you devoted yourself to a single action, one that you made yourself

Running for your life

And as you jump over the stone fence, as you hide among the grapevines and run along the path towards the stone gate of Liyue with the wind carding its hands through your hair, you realize

This is freedom

You're hurt with the ache on your back from where you fell earlier, with stinging wounds and scrapes all over your body due to how fast you're running, due to the fact that there are people chasing after you right now and calling out your name for you to come back

You're leaving behind the only world you've ever known

For the first time in four years, you let out a heartfelt laugh. A laugh full of hope, a laugh full of love, the winds carrying your voice seemingly throughout the entirety of Mondstadt

The gleam of an Anemo vision shines in your peripheral vision, and you see a bunch of Cryo slimes bouncing around it

You run straight towards them

“Young liege!” You hear their worried voices. “Please, come back! It's dangerous!”

A smile graces your face and you swore you could feel the wind boosting your tired, aching feet

Nothing has ever felt more in place than the Anemo vision you picked up in your hand, as circling blades of Anemo whirled up on your feet like roller skates

With the servants blocked by the Cryo slimes, and the Anemo roller blades helping you travel across the path, you allowed yourself to be wholly, rightfully free

The tinkling of the wind resounds around you. This time, it seems like the Anemo archon is laughing alongside you

Laughing as you leave behind the people you've known all your life. As you leave behind the Cavalry Captain waiting for you to arrive at your shift at the tavern. As you leave behind the red haired man who disappeared to who knows where for four years, leaving you behind in the suffocating airs of the city of freedom

Their only remaining family remains in that childhood from another worldline and you're alone yet again

But this time you choose to be

And you'll never let another being chain you down ever again

— Usually I don't like outwardly telling the readers what vision they have since I like to keep it pretty open in case one of you wants your own vision, but its necessary for this story, so here!

[isaac-lahey-imagines]

Imagine #70 | Request #31 (Part 3/3 of Isaac Lahey x Alpha!Reader)

Catch up here: Part 1, Part 2 (might need to rewrite these two though)

Can I just say that you guys who stuck with this blog (and the Wattpad imagines) are the best? And to think I haven't posted in years and we've hit 6k+ followers when I came back?! I don't even know how you people are still here and loving the pieces I put out when I'm here cringing over the old works back in 2015!

Warnings: The usual when it comes to the Teen Wolf series, specifically the Dread Doctors' season, mentions of blood, bones breaking, drugs, needles, a few curse words, idk if this is angst? whump?

Word Count: 6k+ (it's probably the longest I've written omg)

Not much of a flashback or backstory (I'm out of words, I can't squeeze anymore juices out of my brain, my bad). As usual, this is note beta-ed and sorry for any mistakes! English isn't my first language :(

~

“No more, please,” weak cries fell on deaf ears as you were dragged down from one hall to another, the smell of disinfectant and rust overpowering your already sensitive nose and magnifying the headache that was present from when you took a beating earlier.

The sound of bare flesh skidding on the polished floor bounced off the walls as you tried to pull away and run from your captors, you did not care of the stinging sensation that radiated from the pads of your feet - the open wounds left untreated by the people who kept you in hopes that whatever was inside of you can take care of it on its own.

You were repulsed at the thought of them still being considered as people after what they have put you through - they were monsters.

“Just a little more, my dear.” One of the figures that held your arm sneered, the grip on your bicep tightening making you clench your jaw. You internally scoffed at this knowing well that it won’t be ‘just a little more’ with how long and how frequent it happened and will happen.

“She should be able to go through another round.” A voice, deeper than the feminine one from earlier, spoke up as you entered through the heavy double doors of a room - an operating theater you guessed from the setup. “Prep her.”

“Her vitals are stronger now.” The third person declared, their fingers flipping through the pages of the clipboard in their hands before glancing towards the monitor to one side of the room - an image of your anatomy on display with different colors corresponding to each system in your body.

“The less you struggle the faster this will be.” One of the doctors, the Geneticist, who dragged you to this hell hole hummed as she was met with resistance on your end while she strapped you down on the cold metal table, the leather rubbing your already raw skin.

Her patience with you was at a limit, she was close to just ending it - ending you. But they have already achieved so much with their craft that it would be such a waste of time and resource to start from square one.

“Remember,” The Pathologist warned as he walked closer to you once you were settled down. “The louder you scream, the more blood we take from you.”

The tears that fell from your eyes to the sides of your face tickled your ears at the threat, small whimpers coming from you were ignored.

“Might I remind you that the btch wakes up?” The Geneticist interrupted, irritation in her voice as she steadied your shaking right hand before inserting an IV cannula in a vein at the back of your hand and taping it in place. Looking up to her left, she reached for the device below one of the two bags that hung on the pole and unclamped its tube letting the mix of anxiolytic, hypnotic, and anticonvulsant start to flow down to you. She then turned her attention to the other bag beside it, a mix of amnestic, and myorelaxant drugs, and did the same - a near-perfect cocktail mix they specifically designed for you.

She reminded the other doctors that no matter how much benzos, relaxants, or other drug concoctions they pump in your veins, you will wake up in between operations screaming your head off while attempting to break free of the hold you are currently in. “No matter how much sedatives we put in her, her wolf is too strong-”

“It’s an animal-” The Surgeon spoke up.

“She’s an alpha, a pure one-” She argued again, almost growling at the hard-headedness of her co-doctors before she was cut off by the same person.

“An animal.” He spoke in finality. “We are humans - gods even! We are at the very top of the damned food chain.”

The room suddenly fell silent, your whimpers, the beeping of a monitor, and the hum of the machines somewhere in the room were the only things that could be heard as you started to feel the effects of the fluids injected into you.

The tension you felt from earlier began to leave your body just as your vision started getting cloudy, your eyelids feeling heavier by the minute. You didn’t notice the Pathologist holding up a syringe to the light, flicking the bubbles away with his middle finger and thumb a few times before the taste of rubber invaded your mouth with such force that hurt your lips, gums, and teeth.

The Surgeon that was above you, blocking the light for a few moments, had shoved the mouth guard in before he continued securing your head in the metal gear positioned above you. Your neck followed suit with a hard metal clamp attached to the table effectively locking you in place and soon, your whole body was completely immobilized with a loud click from the double lock clamps.

The tears continued to flow down the sides of your face as you fought the sleepiness, praying for this to just end. The dread of what is to come overwhelming you and making your body shake as much as the drugs and table’s hold on you would allow.

“I’m surprised the smart one hasn’t figured it out yet.” They exchanged small talk over your muffled screams as soon as you felt the sharp sting of a needle puncturing your skin and into your cervical spine; expelling whatever it was they created into your system for the nth time. Your ears hurt from the ringing in your head while your throat burned as the pain from the syringe radiated all over your body.

“I’m surprised her mate hasn’t.” The Geneticist replied with emphasis.

“My friends, let us not be complacent.” Their leader ended their conversation as he now concentrated on looking at the x-ray on the monitor showing the movement of the serum as it spread in you.

“We continue our routine - clean her up, wipe her to an extent and then return her. ” He added as he pushed more of the liquid in you with a press of a button by your head.

“Marcel, they will know, soon enough.” She pointed out. “She will start to have withdrawals if-”

“We won’t let that happen.”

~

Sneakers skidding on the floor as everyone seemed to scramble out of the way towards the door, eyes wide with fear looking at the figure in front of them.

“Y/N?”

“Alpha?”

Isaac watched as the massive wolf in front of them let out a deep growl with its teeth bared at the people that called her attention, the fur on her back and chest standing up making her look even bigger than she already is.

“Y/N,” Isaac knew that Deaton was the best person to handle all kinds of supernatural cases, hence, the title of Emissary to their pack. “It’s Deaton.”

Letting out another growl as you licked your lips, your tail flicked lowly behind you as your eyes darted to each person present in the room before landing back to one in particular who was too close for comfort.

“Y/N, hey,” His voice sounded softer, it almost made you feel a sense of comfort until his hand reached out to you and made you snap back and almost bite it off.

This instinctively made Scott pull Isaac back by his shirt to a safe distance, struggling a bit in his grasp as the beta did not want to be moved further away from you despite the situation.

“Isaac, move back,” Deaton warned when he noticed that the curly-haired werewolf was not backing down, a hand gesturing for him to move away from you. “She’s scared.”

“No, Deaton, she heard me. She’s there - Y/N,” Isaac argued before turning his attention back to you again, blue eyes already glassy as tears filled the rim of his eyes. “She heard me.”

Isaac tried to hold on to the hope that you were present underneath the wolf because he was sure he saw that familiar glimmer that was distinctly you.

Just as he attempted to reach out to you again with a whisper of your name on his lips, the same frequency you heard before rang in your ears making you seize up and drop to the ground.

“Agh! What is that?” Liam winced as his hands reached up to his head to cover his ears, eyes scrunching shut as he tried to will away the incessant ringing.

“What’s what?” Mason asked with confusion etched on his face as he looked at his friend then to Stiles and the others, the werewolves in the room in particular, doing the same.

Isaac did not care for the ringing he heard, witnessing you looking like you were being kicked or beaten as you struggled to stand up, the sound of pained screams, whines, and whimpers coming out of you pulled at his heart making him drop to his knees beside you.

His hands hovered over your form trying to figure out what to do while he avoided getting scratched by the large clawed paws that writhed with your body, Scott and Thor doing the same and looking over you trying to see where exactly were you hurting.

“Deaton,” Isaac called as he carefully placed his hand on your shoulder before hissing - you were burning up and the black color that coursed through his veins upon touching you wreaked of disease. “Deaton what do we do?!”

“What is that?” Thor asked in bewilderment as he saw what was happening with Isaac’s arms.

“Hold her still as much as you can,” The vet’s voice was calm despite the mess, going to one of the counters in the room and asking Stiles and Mason for assistance as he tried to collect what sounded like glass vials from the way it clinked in their hold.

Isaac heard Thor mutter an apology to his alpha as he tried to hold your hind legs down as much as he can, Scott doing the same by your torso and Isaac by your neck.

“Y/N,” Isaac continued to call for you as he tried to hold your front legs down. “It’s Isaac, baby - it’s me.”

“Hurry!” Scott called to Deaton as his eyes scrunched and a sheen of sweat already present on their foreheads, the ringing still present in their ears making it difficult for them to concentrate.

Just as Deaton returned and knelt by your side, carrying a stainless steel tray that contained what looked like multiple large syringes in it, the static ringing noise started to get louder making the supernatural beings in the room let out a pained groan and lose their grip on you.

It grew too much too quickly to bear, causing the lights and windows above your heads to shatter and engulf the room in darkness. As everyone ducked for cover, Isaac stayed by your side and tried to shield you from the onslaught of sharp glass descending on you.

It took a few moments before the ringing stopped and the feel of cold air entered the room, snapping them back to their senses as their eyes opened at the smell of blood it carried with it.

Isaac immediately sat up as he felt the cold tiled floor and not your warm body underneath him.

“Y/N,” was all he said before he sprinted out of the room, the others following behind him.

“How did she get out?” He heard Stiles behind him once they reached the outside of the clinic, Thor already looking around the perimeter of the establishment for any signs of you.

Isaac’s brain was running a hundred miles at what he saw and what had just happened inside, his lips quivering as he ran his hands through his hair and pulling at the roots in frustration. He sniffled as he tried to stop the tears from running down his cheeks with the heels of his hands. Exhaling, he closed his eyes and tried to even out his breathing before turning to Scott.

“She’s not gone,” his alpha spoke, already reassuring him. “We’re going to find her.”

Just before Isaac could reply and shoot down the optimism his alpha had, a car screeched to a halt in front of them.

“Where is she?!” Lydia asked as she got out of the driver’s side, a frantic look in her bloodshot eyes.

“Hey, hey, what happened?” Stiles was immediately by her side, cupping her face in his hands. But Lydia only moved out of the way and turned to Isaac and asked again.

“We don’t know where she is. She disappeared right before Deaton -” Lydia was close to tears again as she groaned in frustration.

“They can’t get her back.” She said, sounding more of a beg as her voice shook a little.

Everyone in front of her stopped what they were doing and looked at the Banshee.

“Who’s they? And where do you think Y/N is?” Stiles asked before a few seconds later, realization hit him.

~

It was on the way to Eichen House that Lydia explained everything she saw that made her break all the traffic laws implemented in Beacon Hills just to rush to the vet clinic. Isaac could not shake the feeling that Lydia, a banshee – a herald of death, had visions of you in his arms already in eternal slumber. His wolf broke more than a little as she spoke more of what she saw, only a few words registering to him – Y/N, doctors, experiment, and torture.

Everything was a flash for Isaac now, he did not even realize that they were now in a tunnel under the mental facility planning on who was going where.

But once their strategy was laid out, Isaac wasted no time in trying to locate even the faintest of your scent in the damp and moldy tunnel he was walking through. He heard Stiles and Lydia speaking on the phone in his pocket that they'd found an office that had files strewn everywhere – files that specifically contained information about you and what they have done with you so far.

“Any luck finding her?” Lydia asked as Isaac heard papers being flipped on the other end of the line.

“Nope, not yet,” Liam replied.

“No, she’s not here.” Thor was next then Scott, all claiming to find only empty rooms and dungeons.

“Isaac?” Lydia asked after not hearing from him.

“None,” he answered, sounding defeated as he rounded another corner with you nowhere in sight.

Isaac could hear collective sighs as they continued their searches, his ears already drowning out what Lydia and Stiles were doing - occasionally spitting out questions of why’s as they continued to browse through what they found in the files.

His breathing became labored as his mind started to play tricks on him the further we walked down the tunnel, the source of light slowly fading the deeper he went.

Just as he was about to turn another corner, the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. He felt as though soft fingertips touched him, making his skin crawl as he turned around quickly only to find an empty space. But as he directed his attention to the other corner of the room, the colors on his face drained.

Amidst the mess of metal chains and torn blankets, Isaac watched closely as the figure on the floor took a raspy breath, eyes moving behind closed lids, lips mumbling incoherent words.

“Y/N?” Isaac slowly approached, the other members of the pack on the other line calling for his attention and asking if they heard him call your name.

At the sound of your name being called, your body went rigid. Your eyes flew open, widening as you saw a shadowy figure in front of you moving closer.

“Please, no more.” Your voice cracked from the overuse as you begged, the sound of heavy metal clinking together echoed in the empty room as you backed away slowly. “I’m sorry! I won’t do it again, please!”

Your frame quivered as you continued to plead, sweat mixed with blood trickled down your body as you attempted to make yourself smaller against the corner of the cell; failing from the sudden pain on the back of your neck that restricted you to move any further away from where you were.

“Y/N, it’s Isaac. I’m not going to hurt you.” Isaac ignored the voices over the phone calling for him, asking if he really found you. “You’re safe now, they’re not going to hurt you.”

Isaac almost expected for you to cower further away from him, but you didn’t – instead, you relaxed a little as his hand landed on the small of your back and the other on your shoulder effectively pulling you into an embrace.

As Isaac felt you release a breath before melting against his chest, his scent effectively calmed you down as your wolf recognized her other half. You both stayed like that for a while before he went back to examining you and what was behind you, more so what was attached to you.

Now, more diligent in his movements, his hands hovered over what seemed to be a tube attached to the back of your neck. He shifted in his kneeling position, careful not to jostle you, before taking his phone from his pocket.

“Something’s attached to her, I need to get it off-.” He informed more to Stiles and Lydia than to others present on the call.

“Don’t!” Lydia exclaimed, panicked at what Isaac was planning. “Not yet.”

“But she’s already hurting!” Isaac’s hands returned to your shoulder and back, holding you closer - as close as the tube permitted.

“That’s connected to her spine, Isaac,” Stiles added, warning him of what might happen. “If you remove it you might do some serious damage here.”

His attention turned back to you when he heard you whimper his name.

You were testing to see if Isaac was really there with you or if you were merely hallucinating again, not sure anymore of what was real after everything that happened to you for the past few years.

“Isaac?”

“Hi,” he smiled down when he pulled away from you a little, his voice shaking as he cupped your face in his hands. “I’m here.”

Your eyes focused on his face, blinking a few times before-

“No.”

That, he did not expect.

“No, no, no.” You mumbled repeatedly making Isaac more confused- were you not happy or relieved to see him with you?

“You shouldn’t be here.” As you came to your senses, you moved out of his grasp and pushed him away at the same time with the little strength you have left.

“Y/N, we came here for you. What are you talking about?” Isaac was hurt, you can see it in his face the way his brows furrowed and eyes already releasing a few tears down his cheeks.

Before you could answer back, the same ringing sounded again.

“Isaac, you have to go, please.” You cried, your own tears flowing down your cheek as you tried to pry his hands that held on to your wrists away, wanting to get out of his hold on you all the while fighting the heavy ache in your body to turn against your own will.

“Isaac, you have to get out of there!” You can hear Stiles over the phone, can hear Scott and the others running to where your werewolf was located.

“I’m not leaving her,” Isaac growled at them but his eyes stayed on you.

“You have to, plea-”

“Y/N!”

A blood-curdling scream left your lips as your body started to tremble on the floor, your bones were visibly breaking and morphing under your skin against your will yet again. The jagged edges of the broken bones breaking through skin and the movement causing purple and blue patches to decorate your flesh, all the while the liquid inside the tube that was still attached to you bubbled angrily.

“Isaac!”

Turning to the person who called his name, he suddenly felt himself being tugged down to the floor as the sound of electricity zipping past them blasted onto the steel bars of a small window on the wall overcame your pained screams.

“Y/N Y/L/N,” the static voice called.

“It’s the Dread Doctors.” Stiles’ voice over the phone can be heard, more papers can be heard being flipped and thrown somewhere. “They’re the ones doing this to Y/N.”

“I need to get it off of her!” Isaac spoke to the phone as he watched Thor lunge at one of the doctors in front of them, his clawed hand not holding back any hits he let out. Scott was next when another appeared much closer to where you and Isaac were.

Once your cries quieted down and your body settled down to small shakes - appeased from the onslaught of transforming against your will, Isaac’s hands hovered over the tube.

“You have to go before they hurt you.” It was barely a whisper when the words came out of your mouth, your body was getting too tired to fight it anymore.

“No, I’m not leaving without you, you know that.” Isaac spoke it with a voice that left no room for arguments as he held the tube in his hand and attempted to pull.

Isaac held back a sob as the screams you let out shattered through the noise of the grunts and punches being thrown. But before he could successfully pull it out, a force had hit him and sent him across the room hitting a wall with a loud thud.

“Near-perfect.” Another doctor, the same one who threw Isaac off of you, had appeared next to you with a device in his hand that, from the looks of it, controlled the tube that was pumping the liquid into you.

“Stop, please!” Your hands flew to the contraption attached to you just as Isaac charged at the doctor, sending them both to the ground.

Blinking away the heaviness of your eyelids, you tried to move from your position on the floor only to fall back down flat on your stomach. The wolf in you whined in panic, barking almost as she nudged you with her head to stand up - that you still had strength in you and she was there to anchor you herself.

“Give her back to me,” You can hear Isaac from across the room, the sight of him swiftly landing blow after blow at the doctor caught you off guard. The blood that ran down his temple to his eyes only added a level of intensity to his yellow glowing gaze as he gave a growl that had an unnerving timbre to it. “Now.”

On the other end of the room, you watch Scott claw at the doctor he was against before the mask fell off and revealed a face that was mottled, wrinkled, and scarred. If the true alpha was disgusted, he did not show it as he put his arms up to block the hit the doctor threw his way.

At the sound of a device dropping to the cemented floor, you felt the vibration of the tube behind you stop - the bubbles silencing as it halted its actions. This immediately cleared your head and relieved you of the pain, the fuzzy veil finally lifting as you took another deep breath and attempted to sit upright again.

Successfully sitting up with a few labored breaths accompanied by a wince, you lifted your aching arms and took hold of the tube attached behind you - the stinging feel of the needle made itself known as the small movement you made just from holding it jostled a little.

Taking a couple of ragged breaths again, trying to gather the courage and strength to pull the thing behind you when the air was suddenly knocked out of your lungs. The sensation of a sharp jab radiated from your side, the groan you let out echoed to the other end of the room making your eyes dart to where Isaac was.

“No,” you let out a gasp at the sight of your mate wide-eyed as he stared up at the doctor in front of him - the pain you felt on your side mirroring where the Surgeon’s swordcane embedded on Isaac’s side and giving it a twist for good measure. “Isaac!”

Your wolf’s painful yips turned to a low dangerous growl.

Feeling the familiar throb in your gums as your canines grew longer, you heard a banshee’s piercing scream all the way from the other wing of the Eichen house while a true alpha’s growl filled the place you were in.

“No more,” You say through clenched teeth, Thor’s knees buckling at the command in his alpha’s voice, Scott and the doctors they were up against stood in awe at the willpower you displayed.

“Perfect,” one of them said under their breath, the final push for perfection.

Finally standing tall, the tube attached to your neck earlier now clutched in your hand, you did not waste time as you took down each person who did you wrong.

Going for the closest antagonist in your life, Thor immediately scrambled out of your way as your claws wrapped around the Geneticists neck. You let your body move past her without letting go of your grip on her before using the momentum to lift the doctor up, the weight and force effectively disconnecting her head from the rest of her body before hurdling her to the Pathologist who was clambering away from Scott and the fight.

Everything was a blur to the other occupants of the room as you zipped past them and took down each one before you finally lunged at the Surgeon who finally released his grip on both his cane and on Isaac.

“My child-” he managed to say as your grip on his neck tightened, his feet barely touching the ground - your eyes glowing a dangerous color as you stared up at him.

You can finally see through the mask, raw pink flesh with stitches decorating it was what the steel mask protected. His mouth opened to say something but only a gurgled gasp came out as your other hand embedded itself in his chest and pierced through skin and muscle. You felt your wolf puffing up with pride and anger - you were their greatest creation and downfall.

Silence enveloped the room as the lead doctor took his last breath before you haphazardly threw him to the ground.

With his nose scrunched and eyebrows furrowed, Isaac pulled the swordcane out of him. His jaw clenching before he let out a pained groan at the feel of the weapon sliding out before leaning heavily against the brick wall while clutching his side.

Your attention was immediately drawn to your other half, managing to wipe off some of the blood on your hand before tending to him.

“Hey,” Isaac greeted as he tried to not lean all his weight to you as you wrapped your arms around his waist, careful not to touch the stab wound on his side. You felt tears playing at the edge of your lashes as you buried your face against his chest, the scent signifying home.

“Can’t really ask you if you’re okay,” You managed to say once you pulled away and looked up at him.

“You’re one to talk,” Isaac replied with a chuckle, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear before placing a soft kiss on your forehead.

You smiled, wiping the stray tear that ran down your cheek with the back of your hand as Isaac’s lips returned to your forehead for another kiss.

“Y/N, look-”

“No!”

A loud bang and the pain that came with it suddenly broke the bubble of peace you were in.

Clutching you to his chest, you saw the same confused expression that reflected on Isaac’s eyes before they darted from you to where the smell of gunpowder was coming from.

The Pathologist’s hand shook as he held the gun up, a crazed look in his eyes as he attempted to stand up from being buried under his colleague's lifeless body. He muttered incoherent words as he aimed the gun at you again.

But before he can pull the trigger, another loud thud took you all by surprise as you witnessed the man fall down flat on his face.

“Damn.” Lydia was behind him with a bloodied metal bat clutched in her hands - Stiles’ hands were up in the air, his eyes were wide as if he couldn’t believe his girl just did that.

“Well mark me down as scared and horny,” Stiles muttered under his breath, his brain replaying the moment Lydia all but took off with his metal bat and ran down the hall as fast as her heels allowed her to where they were now.

~

“Thank you, Thor.” You hugged the larger-built werewolf, his arms wrapping around you tightly but still being mindful of your current state. “But I don’t think I’m fit to be your alpha - to be the pack’s alpha anymore.”

“I will never understand how you and the others accepted me after what had happened.” Your feet dangled as you sat on a bricked fence outside of the Eichen house, the jacket from Isaac wrapped around you securely to act as a buffer against the coolness of the night.

You can hear Thor’s wolf whine at your words, his face already reflecting the sadness you both felt at what you were doing as he leaned against the fence you were sitting on.

“Alpha, please don’t discredit yourself.”

You looked up at him, not really believing his words with how much damage you’ve done to the pack - to your family.

“You are more than worthy - especially at your age.” He added, pointing out that most of the alphas out there were a hundred years older than you. “You are strong.”

“Thank you, again - for everything,” your lips quivered as you gave your best smile before glancing up to try and prevent the tears from spilling down your cheeks. The thought of leaving your pack broke your heart, they were family. But you needed to have someone better to lead and handle pack-related things -- you needed to recover.

A comfortable silence settled around the two of you before you heard Stiles and Isaac walking towards you.

“Jeep’s good to go, big guy.” Stiles said - more to Thor than you - with a tilt of his head to gesture to where they were parked as Isaac helped you to your feet and walked you towards Lydia’s car.

“You okay?” Isaac asked softly as you both settled in the back seat.

His eyes double-checked the graze on your shoulder from the bullet that hit you, his arms never leaving your side as he let you lean on him - exhaustion already catching up to you with the way your body sagged against his.

No, not really. You wanted to say as he only tugged you closer to him, the drive to Deaton being quieter save for the soft tunes the radio played.

“I will be.”

~~~

Isaac didn’t know what exactly woke him up.

Staring back at the ceiling, his ears strained to hear bed sheets rustling beside him. With the little light that passed through the curtains of the room you shared, he ran his hands down his face before turning to his bedside.

His eyes squinted when his phone awoke and flashed the time, 3:01AM it read - the phone’s screen showed a picture of the two of you together during a weekend picnic Lydia had arranged a few weeks ago. You had your eyes closed and lips smiling - a genuine smile after so long - against his neck as he had his arms wrapped around you tightly while he made a face to the camera.

Isaac stared at his phone’s lock screen a few moments longer before movement on his side and the feel of cold skin touching his leg took him out of his reverie.

Putting his phone back on the nightstand, he curled back down the covers and turned to face you. For someone who’s a warm-blooded supernatural creature themself, you sure have cold feet.

Isaac cupped your face before tucking a stray hair behind your ear, you were lying on your stomach facing him with your hands tucked just a little under your pillow. You were still in deep sleep but it did not look as peaceful as he remembered - your brows were furrowed, your lips moved as if mumbling something and an occasional hand twitch was what he observed.

“Y/N?” Isaac asked, his voice croaked from the lack of use as he leaned on his elbow and tried to coax you awake.

It didn’t take too long before Isaac finally understood what you were saying.

Please, no more...p-please.

Leaning over your side of the bed, Isaac flicked the switch to your bedside lamp open and tried to call for you again. He could now see the thin layer of sweat on your forehead, the sheets bunching up in your grasp as your knuckles turned a lighter shade from how tight your grip was.

I can’t t-take it anymore...

“Hey, baby,” Isaac gently ran his hand down your back a few times, trying not to ‘jolt’ you awake. He knew what methods to use in waking you up when things like these happen, though it took multiple trials and errors with a few bumps - more or less scratches - in the way. But god, he’d take you screaming and lashing out at him any day than this.

I’m sorry, I won’t do it again...

“Y/N, please wake up for me.”

It broke his heart more at the thought that while you were already together, even if in that span of time you were simply friends at first, they’ve already done a multitude of things to you.

“Y/N, I’m here - you’re safe.” He tried again, the soft kiss to your temple lingering a little longer in hopes that it might help - let you sense that he was present and you were not in danger anymore.

“Y/N, no one’s gonna hurt you,” He spoke softly.

Covering your clenched hand with his, it was all it took before your eyes flew open with a sharp gasp of air. It took some strength and swiftness from Isaac to hold your wrists when you sat up so fast - almost bumping his chin in the process - that you almost fell out of the shared bed.

“Hey, hey,” He called for you, your eyes were dilated, blown wide and looking around frantically as if you were searching for the threat that plagued your life a year ago and giving you these night terrors that prevented you from having a good night’s sleep.

“I’m here, you’re safe.” He repeated, waiting for you and not letting go.

“Isaac,” He waited a little more before you finally settled down and realized where you were, your voice shook a little as you spoke his name; eyes glassy as you looked at the familiar blue eyes that called for you.

“I’m here.” Isaac gave a small smile as his hold on your wrist loosened before sliding his hands in yours and holding onto them on your lap - the soft yellow light from your bedside lamp gave his face a soft glow; his eyes looking more kinder that it already was.

Not again. Your lips trembled as you held back a sob, you shook your head as you stared down at your joined hands.

You felt trapped.

That was the only thing you felt and you wanted out, you wanted this to stop; you want an end to this thing happening to you - you don’t deserve the man in front of you.

Having known you for so long, Isaac can already see it on your face, he already anticipated it.

“I love you,” He spoke.

Absolutely no room for arguments, “I won’t leave you.”

You felt Isaac’s hands rest on your hips as you withdrew yours from his hold and tried to stop and wipe as many tears as you could with the heel of your hands. He let you lean your head on his shoulder, the feel of his lips placing a comforting kiss to your ear should’ve given your heart a little leap but it didn’t.

“How much longer will you tell me that before you finally get tired?” You did not mean to say it out loud, you hiccupped once your tears finally settled down with your head and heart.

“Never,” Isaac said as he pushed you away a little to look at you, cupping your face in his warm hands to make you look up at him, a glint of playfulness present. “You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

You could only sigh and give a soft smile.

“You’re too good for me, Isaac.”

Bringing your hands to his lips to kiss your knuckles, he let them go before cupping your face again and leaned down to plant a kiss on your forehead, then your nose and lastly a chaste kiss on your lips.

“You deserve good things, Y/N.”

You deserve them after everything you went through. Isaac gave that smile he reserved only for you when he pulled away.

Lying back down, Isaac pulled you closer to him before pulling the covers up just below your chin.

“We’ll be okay, remember?” Isaac reminded you of the words you said to him when he asked you a year ago.

You did not miss the way he said ‘we.’ You did remember what he told you, that you were in this together - you’re it for me.

“I remember,” you answered, curling as close as you can to his side. The tip of your nose resting against the warm skin of his neck as he rest his chin on top of your head, arms tightening around you before they relaxed.

~

Feedbacks are always appreciated! Especially since I miss writing. But again, I won't be doing much writing anymore since I've somewhat lost touch with both my imagines blogs. I might just rewrite/refurbish some of my old imagines/drabbles.

Again, thank you so much for those who stuck by this imagines blog (and for Brett as well). You don't know how much I appreciate it, again, I'm sorry for not being active (read more here)

[done-dm]

Talks Machina Summary, Episode 62

Sorry about missing out on the last episode, but finals and AP tests are dragging me through the mud and sometimes it's nice to just enjoy the episode. Without further ado, let's get to the summary.

No more GIF of the week contest. From now on, there will be a cosplay of the week starting next week. Only individual photos will be submitted (no group photos). The submission process has changed: visit critrole.com/submit to submit fan art and cosplay.

Jester has cast sending 38 times, making it her second most used spell after cure wounds.

It's been roughly 3.5 months since Nott and Jester sent their letter to the Soltryce Academy.

Ashley wants the audience to know she's there because everyone else was busy.

Jester likes having a roommate, and she thinks Beau likes it too. They talk at the end of the day, so they wanted to stick together.

Yasha is looking forward to commune with the Stormlord again after their last interaction. Her choice of the room with the balcony was because she's not used to sleeping in her room and to make communicating with her god easier.

Ashley considered rooming with Caduceus, but didn't want to steal his thunder (since he worked so hard on it). Yasha might sleep in there occasionally.

Jester's attempts to make people happy come from fear of disappointing others. She grew up with expectations for herself and equates her actions with love and keeping that love. It wasn't really an intentional character choice on Laura's part, it just popped up naturally.

Yasha is struggling with the love people are giving her. Before Jester decided to paint the room, Yasha was not going to decorate or add anything to the room. She doesn't feel deserving of it but wants to stay with these people. She feels trapped under a roof and does not have much experience with it.

Feeling undeserving is a common theme.

Laura has ideas for decorating the rooms of the others except for Fjord (since he specifically asked her not to do it).

Blindspot is getting one more season.

Yasha doesn't feel like a full member of the M9, but Ashley says a lot of that is on her. She's getting more dialed in with the group, but it might still be uncomfortable for her for a while.

Caleb makes Brian nervous.

Jester is the real villain now.

Dani thinks every character in the party could become a villain. Every one of them has the potential to turn on the group.

Jester wanted hole in the wall to spy, then to talk through, then to make a door.

A discussion of Fjord's perception check.

Henry and his pineapple.

Yasha told her backstory to the group partially because Ashley won't be around for long and partially because they needed to discuss it. Yasha did feel comfortable enough with the group to reveal that information willingly.

Jester feels comfortable with the fact that she and her mom hide their names well enough to avoid suspicion. She's still a little worried. Jester blames Nott since she didn't know anything about Astrid at the time.

Yasha won't ever be able to live down her choice to leave Zuala. It did mean something to Yasha that Beau called her a survivor, but she thinks Beau might not actually mean it.

Laura doesn't know if it's possible to avoid Nott eventually leaving to be with her family. Yasha would be very understanding if she did leave. Laura says there's no world in which Nott would choose the M9 over her husband and son.

Jester wouldn't hold any animosity towards Caleb for the sins of his past. Unless it was, like, something really bad like killing his parents or something.

The fan art of the week is seriously gorgeous. And there's a hidden dick.

If Fjord was acting suspicious, Yasha may decide to follow him at some point.

Jester has been very forward with Fjord and he hasn't returned any of it. If anything it made him close off from everyone. Jester is backing off a little bit, especially now that she realizes that she doesn't really know what love is. When Fjord was acting out all of her fantasies during the flirting scene, she doesn't really know what to think anymore.

Graph paper married.

Ashley wants to avoid heavier armor since it would change the way she plays the character. Ashley has discussed potential ways to increase her AC with Matt.

Jester loves playing telephone for everyone else in the party (aka using sending to contact others). But it is a little annoying to lose those spell slots.

Yasha spoke ill of Xhorhas due to her experience there, but also so the group would avoid it. Problems await her if she runs into her tribe.

Ashley's mom had an interesting way of getting rid of hiccups.

Ashley as the player is excited to go to Yasha's home. Yasha is not. She will continue to avoid her tribe until she can't anymore.

Jester is very sure that the Gentleman is her dad. She wont believe he's intentionally ignoring her. Also, Laura has a plan for meeting with the Gentleman if they ever go back.

Ashley isn't sure what Yasha's favorite flower is. Xhorhas was so barren that all of them are beautiful, and there are still more to discover. Yasha has lots of flowers pressed into her book.

Zuala is the proper spelling. Ashley has declared it.

"Trust me, I'm your fiancee" are famous last words.

[finnyisanactualrayofsunshine]

ohh!! how about the ask thing for ronald??? :D ((this is actually my first time doing smth like this, I'm nervous and excited!!! :D)) and mybe Grell and Lau if you wanna???

Thank you so much!! I love getting asks so feel free to send them, and I'm honoured to get your first one of this sort! Someone else sent me grell so I'm gonna answer that one there but I'll do the other two here (sorry I'm so late, I've been super exhausted lately because I've been working a lot the past week, I'm not ignoring these though) Give me a character and I will answer: Ronald Knox edition Why I like them: I was talking about him with my irl friend once and she was like "is he just a fucking meme" and I really think that sums it up. He's just. A fucking. Meme. Also he talks about having a lady friend and honestly? Iconic.Why I don’t: this isn't necessarily reasons I dislike him but maybe reasons he's not as important to me as some other characters. I feel he hasn't had as much development as some other characters so I haven't gotten like super emotional over him (yet). Also this sounds weird but how I feel about characters tends to directly correlate to their relationship with Ciel and since he doesn't have much of one I'm also not as attached as I hypothetically could be. I don't think there's anything I actually dislike about him though.Favorite episode (scene if movie): uhhh I really like that episode in BoC when grell has just been let of reaper court or whatever the fuck and she's swinging her death scythe around and thanking him for getting it approved and they're just chilling? That's a good episode I forget what number.Favorite season/movie: BoCFavorite line: honestly just any line where he refers to someone as his lady friend Favorite outfit: he...he just has one...OTP: I really ship him with grell lately tbh. Like I didn't used to but then I suddenly fell into the ship and here I am. I'm 100% sure he has the biggest crush on her (and once got drunk and called her a milf) and I don't think she reciprocates it right now but it would be really cute to have a classic rom com moment of realizing all she wanted was right in front of her, falling in love with her best friend, etc. It's just. A pure and good ship.Brotp: him and will I guess? Honestly I haven't thought about it that much but like they've got a good chill dynamic. I also really want to see a brotp with him and othello, or him and Lau.Head Canon: in a modern Au he has a YouTube channel and always opens with WHHHHAts up guys Unpopular opinion: okay this is probably the only time I'll ever make a headcanon like this but. I see him as being completely straight tbh. Idk, I just. He seems straight. But in like a pure and supportive ally way. But still. Idk. It's a risky opinion. A wish: I wish we get a scene of him having like a deep convo with grell and being emotionally supportive that would be cool An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: hmm I'm honestly not sure? I don't think I actually have anything like this for him.5 words to best describe them: iconic. Smooth. Wild. (a) nerd. Loyal.My nickname for them: Ronald McDonald Give me a character and I will answer: Lau edition Why I like them: I think he's one of the most complex and interesting kuro characters. He has a lot of depth that has only been slightly touched on but is definitely there. I also like him in relation to Ciel, in that he provides a different dynamic than any of the other people in Ciel's life. Hypothetically I could say I like him because I relate to him but also to be fair I project myself onto him so much that I may have forgotten what's canon and what's headcanon. Why I don’t: I don't think there's actually any reasons I don't like him. Don't get me wrong he's a HELLA flawed and problematic character but if anything those things make me like him more. I'm a sucker for characters who are suffering and make bad decisions and aren't always right or moral and have ugly moods and emotions because that just makes them more real and tangible for me. Favorite episode (scene if movie): I really like the first episodes of both BoC and BoM with him. They have lots of great scenes. The good Lau content. Favorite season/movie: BoM because he was a consistent character in itFavorite line: okay I've got a few but for lighthearted one, the one where he's describing Ciel to Arthur. Also when he calls Ciel a bully in a really adoring way is pretty adorable. For heavier ones, I really like both the one at Madame red's grave where he says that if Ciel doesn't ask for help he'll sink in the mud, you know that one? Also the one where he goads Ciel on about whether he'll be able to handle looking at the corpses of JtR victims and when Ciel brushes it off he says the thing about how the look in Ciel's eyes is good, and he sounds really like. Impressed. Favorite outfit: his crop top in Weston arc is very cute. Also the outfit he wears when visiting UT. OTP: I'm a loyal cielau ho, y'all know this by now Brotp: him and sieglinde, Lizzy, ran Mao (look he just seems like that guy who's friend group is 90% girls), Madame red, GRELL, kinda want to see him interact with finny, yeah probably a few others but you get the idea. Head Canon: I may or may not have mentioned this before but I hc that he has PTSD and that comes into my other hcs a lot so. Yeah. Unpopular opinion: he's not a comic relief character or a villain. The fandom reduces him to either a villain or comic relief a lot and then acts like that's what Yana wrote but he actually has a lot of depth and complicated sides and I wish people could see more than a one dimensional view of him. A wish: he has a quiet bonding moment with Ciel. We get a development arc including his backstory. He's confirmed bi. We get to see him kill people in dramatic ways and then be covered in blood. Any/all of the above. An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: either him dying or him betraying Ciel. I honestly don't know which would be worse. Because him dying means no more content of him, but him betraying Ciel means me dropping him as a fave and since I love him a lot that would kind of suck so. 5 words to best describe them: moody. Childish. Needy. Aggressive. Unstable. (I say a lot of negative things about him tbh.)My nickname for them: that lanky noodle of a Chinese man